Get Me To Bentonville!

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On this episode of the Commercial Break,

2024 starred Lizzo, Backstreet Boys, Peyton Manning, and Robert Downey Jr.

Wow, was like an MC of the event.

Okay.

But this year,

pop country superstar Post Malone.

Okay.

They're bringing in the big guns.

Yes.

Post Malone,

Noah Kahn,

Camilla Cabello,

and Jimmy Fallon

were in attendance to entertain the good folks of Walmart.

Starting at 8 a.m.

in the morning.

It's a day-long celebration where Post Malone is playing for you at 8.15 in the fucking morning.

The next episode of the commercial break starts now.

The party of the morning!

Oh, yeah, Cats and Kittens.

Welcome back to the Commercial Break.

I'm Brian Green.

This is my dear friend and the co-host of this show.

Christy Joy Holy, best to you, Chrissy.

Best to you, Brian.

And best to you out there in the podcast universe.

How the hell are you?

Thanks for joining us.

I got some schmutz in my throat.

I know I've had it in mine.

Yeah, every time you walk into the studio, you start coughing.

I know.

Yeah.

Maybe it's the studio.

Maybe it is.

Maybe all the years of wires and

God knows what else in here is just, it's time for a change of scenery.

It is time for a change of scenery.

Just let you know that Chrissy and I will soon be doing some in-person recordings with some of our guests thanks to the good people at Odyssey.

Odyssey is our network.

They essentially

handle a lot of stuff on our behalf, but you know, when you're a podcast, you can't do everything, although we try, you can't do everything.

And so they do some of the business stuff for us, including, you know, find sponsors and put them into the show show and all that.

But they're wonderful people, all of them.

And Odyssey has hundreds of local radio stations across the country, or maybe thousands, I'm not sure.

They have one here in Atlanta, and they have offered the use of their studios, their professional studios, for Chrissy and I to host people in person.

So we're going to be starting that in July.

We'll be in person.

And so here's what I want to say.

God, it's been a long time since I've stepped into a radio studio.

It's going to be really weird.

it's gonna be really weird i you know we got a video last night from one of the operations people

and uh yeah just looking at the video made me feel weird

because it does there are some similarities

i just hope we don't run into anybody we used to work with

yeah

like you two idiots i think uh i think we do know

a friend yeah okay but those people we know and we like right i hope we don't run into anybody we don't like how's that Yeah, anybody that made our radio experience so miserable, I hope they're long gone out of this town and not at Odyssey.

I don't think they are, but um, and the people at Odyssey are great, so maybe we'll give them a pass if they are with Odyssey.

But here's why I bring this up: I think in the future, not anytime soon, but I think in the future, we may there may be an opportunity for people who live close to see us record in person.

So, do us a favor: 212-4333 TCB, 212-433-3822.

If you live like within an hour of the Atlanta area, let us know and we'll start putting a list together.

And if that happens, if it comes to fruition, if we're allowed to do it, if we decide to do it,

we'll pull out that list and we'll start emailing.

So 212-433-3TCB, let us know you're interested in seeing a live taping of the commercial break.

Also, we're going to be doing that on Twitch and Kik, and we'll start that probably in July at some point too.

So stay tuned.

Follow us at the commercial break on Instagram.

If you would, if you could, if you don't mind.

So one of the weirdest things I've seen in podcasting in a long time, I found this morning.

I passed it around.

This is crazy.

And this parlays into another topic I wanted to talk about.

So there is a guy here in Atlanta who claims to be the podcast guru, you know, launcher podcast, whatever, with a million and a half Instagram followers.

But, you know,

like sidetrack just for one second, Chrissy sent me this article the other day.

And she's like, oh, I guess now they're just telling you where to find fake followers.

Chrissy sent me me this article that appeared that it was from the AJC or an adjunct like, you know, the AJC can own these smaller newspapers around town or business.

Rough draft or something was the name of it.

Something.

And she sends it to me.

It takes a keen eye, but you would realize that this is really just an advertorial, which means that it's, it looks like it's a real article, but what it really is is an advertisement for a service where you can buy fake followers.

And it's giving you the pros and cons to buying fake followers.

Like, oh, if you're a business, then juicing your followers could lend some credibility.

If I thought that was true, I would have done that a long time ago.

No, because fake followers are only going to get you so far.

People are going to realize they're fake followers, and then they're not going to want to follow you because you have a bunch of fake followers.

I'd rather have 7,000 real followers than 7 million fake followers.

I mean, let's be real.

I'd rather have 7 million any followers, but I'd rather have 7,000 real followers because

at least we know that they're out there somewhere.

And

know, it is what it is.

Okay, we have 7,000 followers.

So pathetic.

Tens of thousands, tens of thousands, hundreds of thousands of listeners.

And only 7,000 of them

could see fit to go to Instagram, which I know you have, to go to Instagram and press follow.

Please do that.

And that's the only way you're going to find out if we do special stuff like live recordings at Odyssey or on Kik or Twitch.

So go follow us, please.

And I know some of you have done that over the last couple of weeks, and I appreciate that.

Thank you very much.

Okay.

So I find this guy who's got a million and a half followers doing podcast launches.

And he has reposted someone from Franklin, Tennessee, another podcaster, walking into her local Walmart.

And just like I found casinos at my local Kroger, she found a podcast studio.

Yeah.

Like a real

studio, like real studios.

And they have these all around the country, by the way.

There's nothing new about for-rent podcast studios.

A lot of people have them.

They're studio spaces, couple microphones, couple cameras, table chairs.

A lot of people do them with the

shared workspace.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And

but now they have one at a Walmart in Franklin, Tennessee, which is just crazy to me.

There has to be some angle here from Walmart.

There has to be some angle.

I don't know what it is.

I will, but I don't know what it is.

I don't know why they're involved.

Is it just I'm just renting the space from my local Walmart?

Or is this Walmart is putting their hands on this because they see some value in having their own podcast network?

I'm not sure what it is.

I

hate to say never, but it's highly unlikely, Chrissy, that we will ever be showing up to a Walmart to do our podcast recording.

That is insane.

Now, if you live in Franklin, Tennessee.

Which is right outside Nashville.

Right.

And you have limited access to equipment that you need to do a podcast.

I guess you could go rent the studios.

By the way, they're for rent.

You have to pay for it.

You don't just walk in and do a podcast.

You have to book the time and rent it.

But they have some pretty legit looking technology.

Like, it doesn't take a lot to make a podcast.

Look, look at this.

Look at me.

You think I figured all this out on my own because it was hard?

No, because it's easy.

But it's just beyond me why Walmart has decided to get into the podcast game.

Are they going to run podcasts like they run Rachel in the middle of their stores?

I mean, you know what I'm saying?

Yeah, probably not because they would need to filter what people were saying.

Yeah, but there's lots of podcasts out there that are pretty.

But I guess you're right.

I mean, anybody could take objection to anything.

Yeah, yeah, so probably not.

But, you know, like I pointed out, hey, if you need a wire, you're right there.

Yeah,

if you need anything, if you need to put together a Western Union telegram, you're right there.

If you need

a quart of oil for your car, you're right there.

Cheap Tupperware, you got it.

No problem.

Mile seven.

So you could, you know what, Chrissy?

We could get an oil.

We got a quart of oil, cheap Tupperware, and episode number 1600 of the commercial break all in one trip.

I'm going to meet you there.

And you're out of the house, right?

That's true.

Yeah.

Actually, the commercial break will now be exclusively recorded at Walmart

in Franklin, Tennessee.

You know, the thing is,

for a place like

a show like the commercial break, it actually might not be a terrible idea to go to the Walmart because we'd probably have content for days just watching people walk in and out of the Walmart.

Yeah, that's true.

We'd get guests that were crazy to come in the door.

We'd just pick the characters, just pick them, pull them in.

They sit with us for 15 minutes.

Someone's going to think of this idea.

The people people of Walmart podcast at Walmart.

Uh-huh.

Yeah, there's an idea.

I gave it to you.

Go forth and prosper.

Because our local Walmart doesn't have that yet.

Not to my knowledge.

I think they only have one in Franklin, Tennessee.

That's it's just insane to me.

It's just insane to me.

I went to Walmart,

I don't know what it was.

It's a week ago or something.

I went to Walmart.

You know,

I'm not high on my horse about Walmart.

They provide cheap groceries and other sundries in one location

that's very accessible for the middle class, lower middle class.

I thought the same thing because I hadn't been in one in a long time and I had to go the day we were doing our endless day.

I ran over.

I needed to get a light bulb and some gardening soil and like a couple other miscellaneous things and they were all in one place.

You can get it all right there.

So Walmart has really defined what a big box retailer is, all the things in one place, and then Target, and then all these other things.

So, I'm not precious about Walmart.

I understand it's a huge corporation, and it doesn't do all the things good all the time, because a corporation is just a money-making machine, and money doesn't care, just doesn't, right?

It's never going to.

The shareholders are never going to care about whether one particular associate has health care or doesn't, has

makes enough money to pay their rent or doesn't.

That's just not what it's, that's not what it's built to do.

That's the downside of consumerism, of capitalism.

But when you need something cheap, when you have 12 to 15 children and you need to go buy something and you don't want to pay a premium for the premium brand or whatever it is, or you need to buy multiple things from groceries to Tupperware to a cord of oil to potting soil or a light bulb, there's one place to go do it.

Let's go do it there.

It's like Home Depot.

They have all the things I need for my house.

I go to Home Depot, right?

Exactly.

And they're competing with Amazon.

They're really trying to get people away from ordering.

And I saw that Walmart's going to be doing drone delivery in Atlanta.

Drone delivery?

Drone delivery.

Say, what?

Wow.

Cool, dude.

Yeah.

That's going to go horribly mad.

That's going to go horribly mad.

They're part of some company called Wing.

Yeah.

Wings.

Yeah.

Wings.

Wings.

Yeah.

It can only do two and a half pounds.

Yeah.

What are you ordering two and a half half pounds?

Can I get a

Bic lighter and a box of camel lights?

Two and a half pounds.

There's nothing that's like an apple is a pound.

I mean, what are you going to do?

You're two apples?

Can I get two apples, please?

But listen, yeah, Amazon tried this and it failed miserably.

They've been trying this for years.

They said there was going to be drone delivery 10 years ago, but they couldn't do it.

Dominoes tried drone delivery.

I forgot about Domino.

And they kept crashing the pizzas into people's houses.

I mean, I guess this is going to go bad.

I just see it going bad.

Atlanta is not a real place, by the way.

Have you ever seen this online?

You don't do, you don't do social media too much, but there are a number of accounts that are Atlanta focused, and they keep saying the tagline is Atlanta is not a real place.

And then some craziness that's going on in Atlanta that clearly debunks.

ATL Scoop.

ATL Scoop does it a lot too.

Atlanta is not a real place.

It's not a real place.

It really isn't.

Drone delivery, less than two pounds.

God, it's two and a half pounds.

Can I get a half a pound of ham

for a loaf of bread?

Right.

Yeah, that's what you get.

I mean, how are they, how are they going to make money doing that?

They said it's, they're trying to up the you know the weight limit.

Yeah, but then you got to have bigger and bigger drones.

Then you get FAA.

That's so weird.

Yeah, it's going to be weird to see the drone landing in my neighbor's house with a

what?

I don't know.

Lube, I'm not sure what they're going to do.

I want to try it.

Just like I want to try that self-driving car.

I have no interest in the self-driving car, but I'll do it for the show.

If we, if we can record it, it.

I'll do it for the show.

That's what we need to do.

Yeah, I get it.

I'm a little nervous about that, to be honest with you, if I'm being real with you.

But Walmart is this big, huge bad boy corporation that makes a ton of money that has been around forever and ever.

I went to grade school with a kid whose father and uncle were some of the original executives

at the

family.

What was the name of the store before Walmart?

It was called the,

I I Can't remember the name of it.

Kmart?

No, Kmart.

No, Kmart was a different thing.

That didn't succeed.

Hold on,

let me ask Chad GPT real quick because I want to make sure I get this right.

I want to make sure I get this one thing right on the commercial break.

What was the original name of the Walmart stores?

May I also point out that you were very against AI and now Chatty is your best friend.

That's right.

Yeah, you're right about that.

Yes, Walmart discount city.

And I think there was a couple of Walton discount cities too.

Those were originally in Arkansas, right?

That's where Walmart is based in Arkansas and Bentonville.

But they had the original stores, I think, were in the Little Rock area.

But his uncle, this kid Tony that I went to school with, his uncle and his father were original executives at that store, at that chain of stores when they started to suck up all the other discount stores and then build these huge discount retailers.

And so I don't know where Tony is today.

I'm sure he's in Majorca

on a cliff somewhere, but they were well-to-do back then when I knew them.

And I'm sure that

they've only gotten more wealthy because of the incredible expansion of Walmart in the 80s, 90s, 2000s, right?

We all know it.

We all have one.

We all have been there.

And we've all seen that it's a magnet, not only for middle-class folks looking for stuff that, you know, on a budget, but for everybody.

And Walmart can be kind of a crazy place.

It's not real.

Walmart is not a real place.

You know what I'm saying?

So I go to Walmart

a couple of a week ago, and I'm in there looking for whatever it is I'm looking for, and I can't find it.

I'm looking for, oh, like a dish towel or something like that.

So I asked the lady, do you have like just a regular white throwaway dish towel, like a rag, cheap rags, right?

And she says, oh, this was after the baby threw up.

Okay.

Oh, yeah.

And so she says, yeah, you had to stop at the Walmart.

Yeah, go to this aisle.

And I say, say, okay.

So I start walking toward that aisle and I look down the aisle and there is a lady who's probably in her 50s or 60s, heavy set, maybe 250, 300 pounds in a string bikini

with a wig on that's a mullet.

Yes, that's exactly the kind of person you would want to talk to.

Yes, that's the kind of person you would get.

And I did not,

I bailed on the rags because I was like, not going to do it.

Not going to get in an interaction here.

She was right where I needed to go.

And I was scared.

I just was scared.

That was it.

But Walmart is this big, bad corporation with

hundreds of thousands, maybe a million employees

throughout the world.

And some people argue that they don't always treat their employees well.

Well, of course, you can't when you have that many employees and some of them are making less than a living wage.

You know, part-time, full-time, there's a a big distinction of whether or not you get benefits and all that stuff.

I thought they were trying to change that a while back, but they did.

I think during the Obama administration, they had some big flub up and Walmart decided, okay, we're going to, you know, give people a living wage.

Pay better and do insurance.

And then during the Trump administration, they get rid of all protections for everybody.

I mean, it's just

a corporation.

They are pandering to the administration because that's what they have to do for survival.

And survival means making the most amount of money possible.

So, you know, I don't know, good, bad, or indifferent.

That is the world that we live in.

That is the thing that happens.

Like, people are always, I get in conversations with people and they're like, and I agree with you 100%.

Jeff Bezos, Mark Zuckerberg, who I never thought had the best interest of anybody in mind, but okay, you know, they're pandering to the administration.

They pandered to the last administration too.

Yeah.

Because they don't give a shit.

Their companies don't give a shit.

A company is a money-making machine.

It does not have feelings.

It does not care.

It will not care.

It will never care.

Its whole job, its whole responsibility, its whole life, if that, if you could call it that, it's an it is just to suck up as much money as possible, distribute it to the shareholders and the executives, and move on to the next day.

That's it.

So Walmart, millions of employees all around the world, but they have one special day.

or week where they celebrate some, a few of those employees.

Have you heard about this?

Walmart Appreciation, Employee Appreciation Week, or whatever it is in Bentonville, Arkansas.

And make no mistake about it, Bentonville, Arkansas is a company town.

That's what it is.

It does not exist.

It's not on the map in its current form or in any form unless Walmart is there.

And apparently, it is a very well-to-do, very posh, very lovely city because of Walmart.

Of course.

You know, hundreds of thousands of suppliers every year come into Bentonville.

They stay the night or the week.

They try and convince Walmart to just put one of their items on a shelf so maybe they have a chance at making money.

And then Walmart beats them up for every penny until, you know, they decide that they are or not going to give them shelf space.

It's a, it's, Bentonville is like, it's the mouth of the lion, so to speak.

People going in there and look at, I saw that like Paris Hilton had something in Walmart when I passed by a shelf when I was in there.

Oh, really?

Yeah, she's got, God, I can't remember what it is.

Is it, is it like

kid DJ?

Like, do your patient.

Like, really?

Ferris Hilton.

Yeah, listen, I like

the Zach Brown band.

You know, I like them.

And then I was on Zach Brown's Instagram page.

You know, Zach Brown was here in Atlanta.

He started here in Atlanta

with the Francisco Vidals and the Angie apparels of the world.

Yeah.

I don't get it on my Jacob.

Get him band on a Friday night.

He used to live close to where I lived, and I would see him riding in his Jeep down the street when that song became popular.

And I was like, wow, there's a famous guy with his Jeep riding down the street.

Um, anyway, I'd love to have him on the show.

We'll see.

He's been doing the podcast rounds lately.

So I thought, well, hey, Bella.

Yeah,

Atlanta Connection.

Yeah, we'll see.

So, anyway, so I saw that Zach Brown, he had

a wine or a cooler or something, like the lemon something.

And he had to go to a Kroger where they're selling them.

And he has a mascot that's a lemon.

Really?

This lemon is like dancing around this big display of Zach's wine, and Zach's standing there.

You know, by the way, he's so cut and ripped now.

He's like, he's just, he looks like a wrestler, honestly.

And he's standing there and he's trying to like make it.

Sometimes you got to do what you got to do, right, Zach?

You got to make that those big boys, those big bones.

All right, let's take a break, and I want to tell you about Walmart appreciation because the whole point of the whole segment, and I can't even get to it.

All right, we'll be back.

Could be around a Friday night.

Something else that tastes just right

with the radio moon.

We'll be back.

Okay, you're probably wondering why I, Rachel, have taken over the voice duties at TCB.

It's pretty simple.

Astrid asked me to shut Brian up, even for a minute.

Well, lovely Astrid, your wish is my command.

Do you want to help Astrid too?

You know you do.

Leave a message for her or me or Chrissy at 212-433-3 TCB.

That's 212-433-3822.

You can be on the show too.

Just call and say something.

Anything.

Or text us and we'll text you right back.

Promise.

Then head over to tcvpodcast.com and get your free sticker.

It's your constitutional right to a sticker and we must abide.

You get the point.

Follow us on Instagram at thecommercial break and watch all the episodes on video at youtube.com/slash thecommercial break.

Best to you and Astrid, especially

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As I was saying, Walmart Associate, Walmart Associate Week, also known as Shareholder Week or whatever, is a week that they put on every year.

They've been doing it for years.

And apparently, how it works, this is from like Reddit posts and social posts that I read, is that if you are an outstanding employee or they think you're an outstanding employee, other people then vote you or vote some people from the store to be allowed to go to Bentonville, Arkansas to take part in Walmart Associate Week, where they have shareholder meetings and rah-rah sis boombah.

You did great.

Here's the numbers.

Congratulations.

Yet another year of insanely crazy profits.

I think I read that they made $681

billion in gross revenue.

Now, of course, that's not profit.

$51 billion in profit.

That's, you know, please.

Commercial break makes that on a Tuesday.

Some change.

Yeah.

Yeah.

What?

Profit?

Profit.

What's that?

It's a means to an end.

So they do this whole number.

And apparently it's a very big deal if you get invited to go.

As one person on Reddit put it, quote, you haven't lived until you've been to Walmart Week in Bentonville, Arkansas.

Really?

It's a week filled with, I can only imagine debauchery and hotel rooms and parties and drinking.

I mean, this is Walmart Associates.

That's a tough fucking job to have, no matter what position in the store you have.

Maybe

what do you think a general manager of a Walmart makes?

A couple hundred thousand a year?

A couple hundred.

What does a GM of a

Walmart

make a year?

I bet it's not.

Because I mean, imagine a Walmart store probably makes $40,000, $50,000, $60,000, $100 million a year.

A general manager of a store can make $100 and oh.

we are

so wrong about that.

I was gonna say around a hundred

at the high end

a superstore GM

can make around five hundred and fifty

thousand dollars a year.

Wow,

holy shit, what am I doing with my life?

We need to go

let's go get shops at the wall.

No shit, that's less than the commercial break took on last year.

That's crazy.

That is crazy.

Whoa.

Good for them.

Good for Walmart.

Paying them.

Wow, wow, we wa.

Okay.

A market manager makes about $620,000 a year.

That's multiple stores.

But it also does say that some of the

smaller

grossing stores, like the smaller stores and smaller markets, average about $117,000 to $170,000 a year.

So, okay.

So, either way, if you're a GM, you're doing okay.

You know, you're not rich unless, I guess, you have one of these superstores.

Like, there's a superstore near my house.

Yeah, no.

I bet that person makes $400,000, $500,000 a year.

Geez, I'm going to go talk to them.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Matt, we're going to be podcasting from Walmart.

That's basically what I want to say because Brian's going to be a Walmart superstore GM, and Chrissy's going to have to come there on my lunch hour to record the commercial break.

That's crazy.

All right.

But by and large, the average pay at a Walmart is nowhere near $117,000 a year.

It's probably $40,000, $50,000.

Well, for what, like the cashier?

Yeah, let's see.

What is the average

associate

pay?

Yeah, I bet it's probably $30,000, $40,000, $50,000 a year.

Let's see here.

And now they have those self-checkouts too, which makes it easier.

Yeah, that's true.

Now they don't need as many people.

Well, you know, the average wage here

in Georgia is about $17

an hour, right?

So let's say you're doing 17 times 40 times 50 weeks a year with two weeks vacation.

So you're making about $35,000 a year.

Not a lot of money, right?

That's that's it's tough to live on $35,000 a year.

Yeah.

And you're working 40 hours a week.

you do get i'm sure benefits you know health and all that other stuff when you're working full-time um but okay so you're making forty thousand dollars a year let's say you've been there for a while you're making forty fifty thousand dollars a year and you get voted to go to bentonville arkansas all expenses paid for a trip to the whoop-de-boop dee do

big

walmart parade time party time chrissy This is probably fucking debauchery.

I have to imagine.

If you've ever been to one, 212-433-3TCB, we have to hear about it.

Your name and your voice can be.

I mean, I'm very intrigued with that.

You haven't lived until you've been to this party.

I mean, that's a big statement.

I know.

That's a big statement to say you haven't lived until you've been to that party.

I've been to a lot of parties, some of them wild.

I once saw a tiger eat meat, raw meat,

in the middle of a party.

Jeez.

You know what I'm saying?

Like, I've been to some pretty fucking wild parties.

But this,

from all accounts on Reddit, from people.

of the things?

And like you said, it's just debauchery?

Just debauchery.

A lot of alcohol.

I think it's some people were saying that they do have like company-sponsored.

I mean, basically, like any company retreat.

Exactly.

But Walmart is the biggest company.

So they probably have a lot of rules around, you know, drink ticket type bullshit, right?

You have a wristband, they scan you, you can't have too many.

You probably put alcohol sensors on you or some shit like that.

But you know, there's always a way around anything.

There's the company-sponsored stuff, but that's not where the real action happens.

The real action happens

after parties.

That's right.

Two in the morning, three in the morning, four in the morning, and you're just

wazooed in some, you know, Marriott in Bentonville, Arkansas, or stumbling around this beautiful town trying to find your way back to wherever it is you're going.

We've all been there.

I've been to a few podcast conferences where the same thing has happened.

It always happens at the work events because that's where you don't have your spouse

or whoever, and there's no responsibility.

and it's almost like the company is sanctioning you just getting as ugly as possible and it'll be okay because you you were at the event right it was all under the umbrella and the warm coddling nature of walmart

clear channel or wherever Even the small companies I've been, the small companies are the worst because there's no big umbrella, but then there's also zero chance you're getting fired because you're snorting lines with the CEO.

Yeah.

You know what I'm saying?

But we've all been there.

If you've worked for any kind of corporation anywhere, then you know that these sanctioned events are often the ones that get the most disgusting.

That's just it.

You know, people get crazy.

Romances blossom.

Yeah.

Affairs happen.

People get embarrassingly drunk or high and they do something that makes them a legend or fired one of the two.

Yeah.

You know,

I want to to know.

I want to know.

I want to know all about it.

You have to call and you have to let us know.

But here is the real rub.

So at the end of the week,

capping off this entire, you know, big party, right?

Let's, I think it's, I think it's a week.

I'm about to tell you what they did.

What is

Walmart?

Associate week.

I want to know.

I want to get a little bit more color

on the, you know, like color commentary on this.

Yeah.

I read a lot of Reddit posts, but some of them weren't as clear.

Week-long celebration that coincides with Walmart's annual shareholders meeting, typically held the first Friday in June.

The highlight is the Friday Association Celebration, a pep rally-style event featuring top executives, entertainment, and motivational messaging.

Meeting and educational sessions happen throughout the week, expos and activities.

There are games, vendors' booth, networking opportunities, and sometimes fun attractions like petting zoos.

Petting zoos.

For adults?

Yes.

Okay.

Okay.

So are you ready to hear who played, who was at this year's

Walmart Association Week?

Okay.

You're not.

This is going to blow your fucking mind.

Was it the guy from Creed who I saw at the Belond Stakes?

Oh, no.

But we'll talk about that in the next section.

I love that.

Okay.

Here we go.

This year, well, 2024 starred Lizzo, Backstreet Boys, Peyton Manning, and Robert Downey Jr.

Wow.

Was like an MC of the event.

Okay.

But this year,

pop country superstar Post Malone.

Okay.

They're bringing in the big guns.

Yes.

Post Malone.

Hold on one second.

I just had it.

Noah Kahn.

Oh.

Kamiya Cabello

and Jimmy Fallon

are in attendance to entertain the good folks of Walmart starting at 8 a.m.

in the morning.

It's a day-long celebration where Post Malone is playing for you at 8.15 in the fucking morning.

It's crazy.

Now, I get it.

Listen, all of you are out there, you're saying, holy shit, Post.

Like, you know, you used to be like a real one.

You are are a real one.

And here's why Post Malone cannot turn down, first of all, probably the $2 million that they paid him.

I was going to say, yeah, the money for all of the

people.

Yes.

Including Jimmy Fallon.

Yes.

But here's why you really can't turn it down.

Because first of all, Jimmy Fallon, for those of you that don't know, is an entrepreneur.

He has a lot of different businesses outside of that tonight show gig he has.

But Post Malone sells albums.

And believe it or not, people still buy albums.

They buy CDs.

They buy records.

A lot of people buy records.

A lot of people.

There's even a tape business out there.

Some people are going back to tapes.

Why?

I don't know, but okay, let's do it.

The number one

seller of CDs and records in this country is Walmart.

In the world is Walmart.

And if Walmart chooses to put your album on its shelves like any other product out there in a Walmart, it means sales and probably a lot of them.

Post Malone, Camilla Cabello, they cannot say no to Walmart because they need Walmart to sell those albums.

Because believe it or not, there still is money to be made in the music business.

And a lot of that money can be made selling CDs and albums.

It's one of the few places that musicians can still make money.

You can't make money on Spotify.

You just can't.

You have to, what.

What?

Most like the average royalty check from Spotify, even for the big players, is like $100,000 a year.

That goes to the lawyers and the agents.

That's it.

Bye-bye.

See you later.

So I understand why they feel the need to say yes to this.

But then also, they're playing to a crowd of people who are consumers of their music.

The associates didn't, because the associates are not the Walmart executives making millions of dollars a year on stock options.

They're just regular Joe Schmotts like you and me.

Right.

And they're, you know, hanging out and they're being appreciated and celebrated for the hard work that they do.

So you can buy, you know, skirt steak for $1.25 a pound.

So I can appreciate that Post looks at this in

some and he goes, yeah, this is a good thing for me to do because this is my crowd.

First of all, these are my people.

They buy my albums.

Second of all, I'm getting paid $2 million for a half an hour worth of work.

That's not a bad deal.

Third of all, I get to go to Bentonville, Arkansas for Walmart Associate Week.

And according to some, you haven't lived.

I imagine Post Malone was showing up at some of those parties.

I got to imagine.

Yes.

I got to imagine Post is at some bar in Bentonville, Arkansas, probably doing karaoke.

I hope so.

Yeah, me too.

Smoking cigarettes, doing karaoke with the associates.

Yeah.

But third of all, I need Walmart to put my next album on their shelves so that I can get that sweet, sweet CD money.

I wonder if people go to go to this, like people that don't work at Walmart.

I wonder if some people go to Bentonville around this time just to be amongst

the party.

You got to imagine that they do.

You got to imagine that there are associates out there who ask for the week off or some time off just to be in the mix.

Just to go there and be with their friends, even though they're not sanctioned to be there.

But I also think that Bentonville is probably a company town in the sense that I bet there's a lot of like security and police officers and stuff like that.

They probably have their own Bentonville FBI out there.

You know what I'm saying?

Like WBI, the Walmart.

But just to swirl around the bars, hotels, that kind of thing.

Maybe we should do that.

I just thought you read my mind.

I've been wanting to do the

gathering of the juggalos for years, but it's already been done.

But I haven't seen anybody do the Benville, Arkansas Walmart Associates.

It's out there for the taking.

Listen, we should do this, and then we'll record an episode about it in one of their stores at their podcast studios.

It's all coming together.

That's the job that needs to be done.

I just laid it out, and I think we're going to do that.

If you work for Walmart, and I have to imagine, out of all the tens of people that listen to us, one of you work for Walmart.

If you do and you know about this and you'd be able to share, you'd like to share, right?

I don't want anything that's going to get you in trouble.

We can disguise your voice, your name.

You can write it down.

I can read it.

Whatever it is, no identifying information.

I want to know about all the dirt, all the jam.

I want to hear about it.

What is it like to be at Walmart Associates Week?

Because

I knew about this.

I had read about it in years past, past but i had zero interest in finding out more like it was just kind of like a blurb in a in a online rag but then when i started digging this year i i thought to myself holy shit this really is a jam this is a fucking party and people are out there and these are not you know crypto bros with their private planes running around cooking crack in a fucking easy bake oven these are like normal people like you and me just doing their thing and they get shoved off to bentonville to get drunk and bang their head against the hotel wall.

How awesome is that?

Listen to Bose Malone.

I wonder if there are a lot of,

let me see here.

Hotels, Bentonville,

Arkansas.

Let me see.

Let's see.

Okay.

Let's see what kind of hotels they have here.

I'm just, okay.

There's the Avid Hotel, which looks like one of these nice long stays, Staybridge Suites, Candlewood Suites, The True by Hilton, Embassy Suites, Holiday and Express, Doubletree, Hilton Garden Inn, Home to Suites.

Yeah, they've got a lot of hotels.

No Ritz.

No Ritz.

But, you know, there's only so much you can ask for in Bentonville, Arkansas.

You know what I'm saying?

Yeah.

That's not to say there won't be one one day, but you got to imagine the crowd that they're catering to.

First of all,

a company like Walmart, even the executives are probably having to stay at the Hilton

Garden Inn, right?

They don't want to give the appearance that they're just blowing a bunch of money on the four seasons every time they show up into town.

And second of all, most of the people who come in there, even for business, are small entrepreneurs looking to put their products into a Walmart.

And my understanding is, listen, I had a friend who was trying to do this for years.

And then I knew a lawyer who,

this is weird.

So you know Shark Tank?

Yeah, of course.

There was a guy named,

I can't remember his name.

The very first set of sharks, Kevin

Kevin O'Leary.

No, not Kevin O'Leary.

It was Kevin somebody else.

There were two Kevins and one of them, one of the Kevins, like the first sharks.

There was a shark that sits

in Mark's seat, where Mark sits now, and he was part of the first season of Shark Tank.

And he was one of these infomercial guys.

He would take your product and he would put it on an infomercial.

He would sell millions of them.

That's what he did.

That was his thing.

And he made millions and millions of dollars doing this.

And he became pretty well known for it.

So well well known that when Shark Tank came together, they asked him to sit in that seat.

He was there for the first season.

I can understand why he wasn't the most interesting character.

Like he didn't fight hard for some of the deals.

Maybe he didn't have the connections of the other people.

He just wasn't maybe,

I don't know, telegenic enough.

Let's put it that way.

But I knew a lawyer who worked with this guy.

And he called on a friend of mine and I to work with him to vet out these opportunities.

So they would get leads that would come in the door.

I would help them vet out these opportunities by contacting the inventor or the entrepreneur and figuring out, seeing if it was right for this kind of opportunity for Kevin to then invest in and take to the next level.

So I kind of got a little taste of this world.

I only did this for like six months because, quite frankly, it was very hard.

And every entrepreneur thought they had the next thing.

This one guy had like a cookie dipper straw, like a straw you would put a cookie in and dip it in the milk.

And then you could suck.

Okay.

Okay.

How about your fingers?

Yeah.

Okay.

All right.

Right.

So, I mean, not maybe, maybe, I don't know.

And that was the other thing.

It's like, I'm not qualified to know whether or not millions of people are going to want this.

It's not, I know, it just wasn't interesting to me.

Anyway, I got a little taste of all of this.

Apparently, you walk into a Walmart boardroom, you pitch them this opportunity.

They say, yes, it changes your life almost overnight.

But almost overnight, your margins are shrinking minute by minute because Walmart really does beat you up to make sure that their customers are getting the lowest possible price.

That's part of the discount store motto.

That's how Walmart became what it is.

And so, yes, it can change your life.

You can get a million purchase orders overnight, but you go from 30% profit margins to 3% profit margins.

It can change your life in ways you didn't expect.

And then there's this whole financing that goes on behind the purchase orders and all of this behind closed doors that apparently can or cannot be predatory or whatever.

So, you know, Walmart

is a machine and it all lives in Bentonville, Arkansas.

That is the machine.

And once a year, one week a year, everybody turns up and turns out.

And Brian and Chrissy have to know about it.

So you call me so that I can figure it out.

And then maybe next year, Chrissy and Brian will be in Bentonville, Arkansas.

I think so.

Probably getting arrested by the local Walmart police for showing up in the first place.

You know what I'm saying?

They probably don't take too kindly to

out there to do our podcast in the Walmart.

True.

I mean, a year from now, they'll probably be out there.

So we've got business.

We got business.

We're here to record the podcast and we need stories.

We need clients.

Yeah.

Or Walmart,

if you want to pay us $2 million,

we'll be happy to make this the best story that's ever been told on the commercial break in your favor.

I am not above selling out.

Sorry.

I got a family to feed.

We'll be back.

You make this rather snappy, won't you, huh?

Somebody gotta be thinking to do before 10 o'clock.

Hi, cats and kittens.

Rachel here.

Do you ever get the urge to speak endlessly into the void like Brian?

Well, I've got just the place for you to do that.

212-433-3TCB.

That's 212-433-3822.

Feel free to call and yell all you want.

Tell Brian I need a race.

Compliment Chrissy's innate ability to put up with all his shenanigans.

Or tell us a little story.

The juicier, the better, by the way.

We'd love to hear your voice because Lord knows we're done listening to ourselves.

Also, give us a follow on your favorite socials at the Commercial Break on Insta, TCB Podcast on TikTok.

And for those of you who like to watch, oh, that came out wrong.

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Okay, I gotta go now.

I've got a date with my dog.

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Okay, ready from

Reddit.

I was selected to go for my store.

As far as I was, it was explained to me.

There will be presentations for us to attend from representatives of our store, as well as fun stuff to do once all the presentations are over.

Someone earlier in this thread mentioned the performers they have had in the past.

I'm not 100% sure.

I'm relatively new to the Walmart world, and I have a ton to learn, I'm sure.

I just got registered to go today from speaking with someone who went in 2023.

She basically said that they have different meetings and tours set up to learn about the business.

Plus, they have lots of activities to do.

And when she went, they even had a petting zoo.

She said it was definitely a big learning experience meeting people from all over.

The best time of your life.

Last year, Lizzo, Backstreet Boys, and etc.

played.

It's the opportunity of a lifetime.

Everything is paid.

They feed you.

They They booze you.

You get to talk to associates around the world.

There's lots of walking, though.

It's the best time I have ever had

in my entire life.

Whoa.

It's the best time I have had.

Jeez.

In my entire life.

Oh, God.

Wow.

That's.

I said we decamp.

Yeah, we got to do this.

We've got to be in Bentonville for a week next year.

Let's see.

Forget about Disney kids.

Yeah.

I want to hear what the real dirt is, though.

I mean, give me the real dirt.

I'm sure that they have fear of getting,

of getting fired.

It's very laid back.

Quote unquote.

Take that.

I'm speaking in code.

Take that for what it is.

Yeah, I was going to say you could make it.

I'm sure you can make it any way you want it.

Yes.

It's also worth mentioning that.

Oh, it's also worth mentioning that you get free food,

but but I'm lucky it to get this lady.

Goes, I'm lucky if I get a bottled water and a PBJ during the afternoon.

Oh, come on, just being ungrateful then.

But I mean, listen, if I made, you know, if you're making $35,000 a year, you're really watching all your P's and Q's.

I can't think of, you know, the only like

true,

I guess,

worker appreciation thing that I ever went to that I thought was worthy of conversation.

I got hired by a consulting company one time.

I was pretty young, you know, at this time.

This is, we're talking like 15 years ago.

You're such a renaissance man.

I am.

I've really done it all.

I was working with Raphael.

We were selling the websites.

We got a client.

That client was a large consulting company.

They consulted on CRM automation,

which is now like the world that we live in.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Everybody does it.

Customer Customer relationship management tools like Salesforce and Eliqua.

And they would

essentially consult with huge companies like Post, the food company or Kellogg's or whatever on how to integrate these systems into their existing systems to capture customer data, use that data in ways that back then we could see coming down the pike, but weren't quite there yet, like

AI and all this other stuff.

So we would go in there, you would go in there for a couple of months.

You would help them mesh these tools together, integrate them, train, teach, right?

And I knew little about this, but I think the guy who owned the company liked me, the person, and thought that I was a good talker.

So he put me as a salesperson as a consultant.

So within two weeks of being hired there,

oh, this is the time that I went to the, I go to the interview.

It's at his house.

I have a car

that has half a front.

I'm not even kidding.

One half of the car is missing, basically.

It's like a 2006 Honda Accord.

Two-door Honda Accord.

Gray.

Okay.

Oh, I'm riding that car.

This is like 2012 or 13 or something like that.

And you parked on the other side.

I parked on the other side of the cul-de-sac.

So if they looked out their window, they could only see the good stuff.

And then I sat in the car and made sure they weren't looking out the windows before I drove away.

But I get to their house.

It's him and his wife who run the company.

They were interviewing me.

And then at the end of the interview, they're like, you got, actually, I was so scared of showing up to my car that I canceled the first interview at their house because I didn't, I wanted to see if I could borrow Raphael's car to show up there.

Well, he couldn't let me use his car.

So I just made up this excuse there was too much traffic to go up there.

And they kept on like, it's okay.

It's okay.

Just come.

Like, you know, we'll wait for you.

And I'm like, no, no, no.

There's so much traffic.

It's going to be all day.

I can't go.

I'm sorry.

They wanted me so bad that they were like, well, come tomorrow.

And Raphael's like, can't do it tomorrow either.

Anyway, so I get there.

I do the interview.

Great.

They're lovely people.

And he says, I want to hire you.

And I'm like, okay.

And he's like, what's your number?

And I'm like, 75.

And he goes, I was thinking 125.

And I was like, that is exactly what I was going to say.

75 plus 50.

I I didn't even give a chance to finish my sentence.

And I was just so thrilled.

Oh, my God.

I'm going to be making this crazy amount of money.

Cause at the time it felt like a crazy amount of money to me.

Right.

And so within two weeks of being there, so I get set up.

You know, it's a remote company.

And this is my like first real, like, kind of remote job, you know, having to check in and all that.

And they give me a computer and they give me a credit card, all this stuff that I had no idea, you know, it was kind of crazy for me.

And then he goes, all right, well, I need you to book your tickets to San Francisco because we have Company Appreciation Week in San Francisco, in

Oakland, actually, across the bay, but it was at this nice resort that we were really going to be in San Francisco.

And I said, oh, oh, my gosh.

Okay, cool.

And I'm like, a week?

And he's like, yeah, you go there for a week.

And, you know, we're going to hang out.

We're going to feed the homeless.

We're going to go to the food bank.

We're going to do a couple of adventures.

We're going to go in the hills.

We're going to have some company meetings.

We're going to train.

We're going to learn.

We're going to talk to each other.

We're going to drink.

We're going to have fun, dinners, all this other stuff.

Yeah, it's fun.

And I go, oh, okay.

And this company has like 70 people that work for it.

So it's not a particularly big company where it's the one time a year they get together and they get to see each other.

I had no experience in any of this.

None of it.

The traveling, the none of it, right?

And so I say, okay, great.

At the time, I had a girlfriend and that girlfriend was a little wacky.

Oh, Lord, was this the San Francisco trip?

Yes, this is a San Francisco trip.

So she comes home and I say, I'm going to San Francisco.

Can you believe this?

I got the trip to this.

aren't you going to invite me to go?

I'm like, it's a company trip.

I don't think it's like that.

And she's like, it's like a company appreciation trip.

I'm sure that other spouses are going.

And I'm like, you're not a spouse.

You're my girlfriend.

And I just got hired.

Yeah.

But it becomes such a big deal that I have to ask them, right?

I have to then ask, can I?

And they're like,

yeah,

okay.

I mean, some of the spouses are going.

They've been working here for a long time, but okay, sure, but you know, she can stay in the room.

I just would appreciate it.

Maybe you could pay for the flight, right?

And I was like, Yeah, of course.

He's like, Listen, I just, the owner of the company was like, Listen, I really don't mind.

It's not that big of a deal, but you got to attend all the meetings.

Of course, some of them she's not going to be able to come to.

All the company events are just for company people.

If she wants to be there, some other spouses are going to be there.

I would fly her out there, but it's just a bad look on the company, you know?

And I was like, No, no, no, I hear you.

I got you.

Okay.

Pay to go out there.

Her and I go out there three days ahead of time.

So we're there for like three days just dicking around and doing this other stuff.

And the very first night that everybody else showed up to this resort, we're in this beautiful resort in Oakland, and everyone met downstairs at the bar to have some fun.

And so we, but I don't know whether or not it's appropriate to bring my girlfriend at the time.

So I go, listen, I'm going to go down and I'll text you.

I'll check out the scene.

I'll check out the scene and I'll text you.

I'll call you.

I'll let you know.

So, like, three hours later,

I'm like, everyone's just wasted.

And some spouses are showing up and I'm like, yeah, come on down.

Chrissy, first of all, it was one of the funniest, funnest weeks I have ever had.

And it was.

You haven't lived.

You haven't lived.

Yeah, until you've been to a small company retreat.

But it was the worst.

I mean, it was the worst ending to any trip I've ever had.

It's painful when you talk about it.

I can't even.

I didn't.

You know, I saw recently, I saw a post.

Those who have listened to the commercial break for a long time will have heard this story that

the girlfriend that I brought,

about

three days into the five days of this trip, ended up going out with one of the other spouses while we were all at a company meeting.

They went, they had sushi at a place

somewhere in San Francisco, and that night, she got violently ill.

And this was not a joke.

This wasn't dramatized.

She would, it was the most, it was the most horrific thing I've ever seen in my entire life.

Coming out, both ends, door wide open.

I literally had to help clean her up.

I mean, it was a bad, bad kind of sick.

And bad kind of sick to the point where we took her to the hospital.

So I was at the hospital till like 3.30 in the morning.

I needed to be at a company meeting at like seven.

It was just, the whole thing was just shitty.

But then we had to go home.

And going home and trying to bring her through the airport was insane.

So,

and I just remember she was like so fussy and screamy at the airport, you know, everything heard.

She didn't want to be here.

Which was not just in this isolated incident.

No, it was not.

No, it wasn't.

It was all the time she could turn on the dime.

That's just the personality that she had.

But so you saw a post.

I saw a post where

someone's at an airport and there's a guy and a girl and they're recording this interaction that's going on between the guy and the girl.

And the girl is screaming at this guy, screaming, young girl screaming at this young guy you know you don't love me you don't care about me you only care about yourself and la la la la la It gave me like instant PTSD.

I was like, that's me.

They recorded me.

That's me years ago.

Oh my God.

I'm in a loop.

I'm in a feedback loop.

It was crazy.

And I thought, how did Instagram know?

They served me up the post that put me back into the feedback loop.

Anyway, it was terrible.

Company Appreciation Week.

Hey, listen, we should do that here at the commercial break, but it'd just be you and me

in Bentonville, Arkansas.

That's what we're doing next year.

Petting Zoo.

I want to go to the petting zoo.

Have you been to a petting zoo?

I'm good on the petting zoos.

I have been to many petting zoos, and I'm good.

Astrid hates them.

Oh, I don't like it.

Astrid hates them.

Yeah.

Listen, I can appreciate that.

We went to a llama farm like a year ago, an alpaca farm, excuse me, not a llama farm, an alpaca farm.

And we went with my in-laws.

And everybody's, some people are really excited to do this.

Other people are kind of like, eh.

I learned at the alpaca farm that petting zoos are not as exciting as

sometimes you make them out to be because you actually have to touch the actual animals, like the animals that don't have the level of cleanliness that you would expect of a human being.

And they're not always nice.

No.

You know what I'm saying?

Yeah, they can be quite.

They're being ped by a bunch of people.

Yeah, they're being ped by a bunch of people.

They're cranky.

They're being hand-fed.

Those alpacas,

they're weird looking.

I like them.

They're cute from a distance.

But then when you get close to them, they smell really bad.

And then they want to lick you.

No, thanks.

There's a lady on television on that Thousand Pound Sisters.

She got bit by a camel.

Like she was at one of those drive-through safaris, and the camel put its head in the car and tore off a chunk of her flesh.

And no fault of her own, right?

The camel did.

But then she got arrested by the local Arkansas police

because when the cops came, they searched her car and found drugs in her car.

Do you remember that saying that?

Yeah.

So anyway, she got put on probation.

And I guess all's well that ends well,

I suppose.

You get bit by a camel and then you end up going to jail.

Oh, and to add insult to injury, so the judge, so they have this big dramatic moment where is she going to go to jail?

Is she not going to go to jail?

And the prosecutor does a plea agreement, but the judge has to sign off on it.

And there's a pregnant pause while the judge reads over it.

And everyone's like, Will she go to jail?

But you know, she's not in jail because, you know, this was filmed seven months ago.

But this moment, and the judge goes, I will accept your plea deal.

No jail time.

You will have to be under probation in your own state.

You know, good luck to you.

And then they're like, Thank you, Judge.

You know, as they're leaving out the courtroom, he goes, Oh, one more, one more matter.

I'm sorry.

I forgot to tell you.

The Arkansas Children of God petting zoo will permanently trespass you from their property.

You're never allowed to go back there again.

And I'm like, she said it, I didn't have to, but like you'd ever want to go back there again.

You got eaten by a camel.

The animals are so hungry here that they chew on people's arms.

Fuck you.

Yeah,

I'm good on the petting zoos.

Yeah.

No, thanks.

But one of our kids loves them.

But when you're a kid, it's a whole other

Past 15, I think, maybe.

Not the same.

I think past 10.

Yeah.

Listen, I love animales.

I want to be all around them.

Yeah.

But the petting zoos can be a little weird.

Let's just all say it.

Those goats have weird eyes.

You know what I'm saying?

Like the mountain goats, they have those weird devil eyes and they want to...

I saw a reel where there's...

They got one at the zoo.

You guys just went to the zoo a little while back.

Yeah, we purposefully walked around.

We didn't do that.

We saw the signs and we were like, go this way.

Because we went last year and we had to hose the kids down for an hour.

Yeah.

Because the animals were like getting a little rowdy.

They were like, you know,

knocking.

You talked about that.

Yeah, what's that?

I remember you talking about that.

Yeah, they were like knocking the kids around.

And I thought, let's get out of here.

That pig's going to eat my child.

I saw this reel where this kid had a pet goat with the horns and he put out a helmet.

Every night he would go out and bang heads with the goat.

I thought there's parenting of the year right there.

Developing brain.

Yeah, exactly.

So stupid.

But then it said he loves his goat so much that he wants the goat to feel like he has friends.

I don't know.

Oh my god.

So stupid.

But have you seen the reel of the elephant pulling the antelope from drowning?

I have not.

I'm going to show it to you.

Puts a tear to my eye.

An elephant grabs an antelope by its antlers and pulls it out of of the water because it is drowning.

A baby antelope.

So sweet.

Unbelievable.

The animal world is great.

They're going to revolt against us if they aren't already.

The whales are eating people out in the ocean.

That's crazy.

All right, 212-433-3TCB.

212-433-3TCB.

You got any scoop on the Bentonville, Arkansas Walmart Associates Week?

Let us know.

We'd love to hear from you.

Or if you're in or around the Atlanta area and you want to be put on the list for future live recordings, let us know.

At the the commercial break and Instagram, TCB Podcast on TikTok, and youtube.com/slash the commercial break for all the episodes on video the same day they air here on the audio.

Go to tcbpodcast.com for more information about the show, audio, video, and your free sticker.

Okay, Chrissy, that's all I can do for today.

I'll tell you that I love you, and I love you.

Best to you, and best to you out there in the podcast universe.

Until next time, Chrissy and I will say, we do say, and we must say, goodbye.

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