TCB Classic: The Meta Best Of Frankie B!

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Speaker 1 Hey there, cats and kittens. As was completely predictable, absolutely unavoidable, and probably much needed, there is no way in hell you're getting a new episode of The Commercial Break today.

Speaker 1 There's 13 of them that we just did over the weekend, so go listen to one, if not all, of those if you haven't already. To be frank, TCB's Endless Day kind of went off without a hitch.

Speaker 1 That is very much unlike anything we have ever done outside of the box. Well, let's be honest, inside the box too.
Usually the episodes of the commercial break don't go all that well either.

Speaker 1 But Chrissy and I just want to say thank you one more time to the hundreds of comments and text messages, phone calls, and well wishes from across the states and across the world, if you will.

Speaker 1 Yes, that's right. One guy in India texted in to tell me I was doing such a good job.
He read my resume and has a job for me where I make over $10,000 an hour.

Speaker 1 And if I wasn't obligated contractually to do this show, it's likely I'd take him up on the offer.

Speaker 1 When I asked the new encyclopedia of the commercial break, Chat TCB, what is the most talked about and requested topic on the commercial break?

Speaker 1 Coming in at number three was our good friend, Frankie B.

Speaker 1 It's no surprise that during the endless day, we got a lot of text messages early in the day asking us if and when we would touch on Frankie B. And we did toward the end.

Speaker 1 And while there hasn't exactly been a waterfall of new content from Frankie B, we did get a few short videos from him over the last month.

Speaker 1 However, there was a a time in Frankie's history and in the commercial break's history when there was a new video out almost daily. As my grandfather said, that made for good groceries.

Speaker 1 And Chrissy and I ate on those groceries and ate on those groceries and ate on those groceries.

Speaker 1 So when I asked Chat TCB if I was to run a classic episode to give the listeners exactly what they want, it referred me to this episode, episode number 73, which is kind of meta because episode number three is a best of TCB.

Speaker 1 Maybe one of our first. And the best of is all about Frankie B.
It's essentially all the segments of Frankie B that we had done up until that point in one episode.

Speaker 1 So at the expense of being meta meta, I am gonna run that episode almost unedited. So everything you hear after this intro is from early 2021.
I will only adjust it in two ways.

Speaker 1 I will cut out the old phone numbers so you don't call them, and I will add in Rachel's liners where she tells you where to go currently, so you're not texting some guy in Iowa named John who won't give me my phone number back.

Speaker 1 Anyway, that's a joke you won't get unless you listen to TCB's Endless Day.

Speaker 1 I'm gonna be screaming right in your face from the very start of this episode, and excuse the audio quality because in 2021, we are a long way from where we are today.

Speaker 1 We will be back tomorrow with a brand new episode of the commercial break. Until then, bye.

Speaker 1 what is going on everybody whoa

Speaker 1 whoa

Speaker 1 what's going on everybody i've been taking steroids since i was 27 years old and i just did two lines of cocaine and i took some red bowl right before i got out of here

Speaker 1 and welcome to another video if you're new here welcome my name is frank bernardo that's two welcomes in one minute just want to let you know that this channel is geared frank bernardo is who we're listening to i just i want to make sure that we know who we're listening to.

Speaker 1 I want to do a double welcome. Yeah.
Welcome. I'd like to welcome everybody.

Speaker 1 We want to welcome you.

Speaker 1 How welcoming can we be? Welcome. Just say welcome.

Speaker 1 For all guys out there, 50 and above, who want to up their game, look and feel better about themselves.

Speaker 1 So, gentlemen, at any time during a video, if you like what you see, if you find it informational, hell, if you even get a good laugh out of it, do me a favor, give it one of these and hit the subscribe button.

Speaker 1 Not only do I want to subscribe, but I'm horny. I'm just horny because of this guy talking.

Speaker 1 I want you to know that Frank's chant. If you can find Frank Bernardo's channel on YouTube, he's got many, many videos.

Speaker 1 He on, like, his, I can't, you can't see it because you're listening to this on a podcast unless you're watching YouTube, and I can't play it because it's someone else's YouTube video.

Speaker 1 I mean, I guess I could, but

Speaker 1 he has a channel and he focuses on entertainment,

Speaker 1 fitness,

Speaker 1 food,

Speaker 1 women, grooming, fashion, styling. Men with low T.

Speaker 1 Men with low T and erectile dysfunction. This guy, his opening montage has all, it just comes up and it says, Frank Bernardo, fashion.
Frank Bernardo, grooming, fashion, fashion expert.

Speaker 1 He's an all-round expert on everything over 50. If you have a dick, here we go.

Speaker 1 So you don't miss my upcoming videos. So guys, you found this video for a reason, all right? Maybe you are suspecting your wife is cheating and does it happen? Absolutely.
You see,

Speaker 1 absolutely. Absolutely.
Is your wife cheating on you? Absolutely. You found this video for a reason.

Speaker 1 You found this video for a reason. Your wife asked for a divorce.
Yes.

Speaker 1 Unfortunately, we always get labeled as cheaters, but guess what? Our wives are actively cheating as well. This is like a huge assumption to make.

Speaker 1 Maybe talking to me. I think he's talking to everybody.
Oh, well, let's not even bring Henry into this conversation because then we got two fucknuts talking at the same time.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah, they're sexting other guys. They're going on base.
They're having full-blown affairs. Guys, she wait, women are having full-blown affairs.
Is this true?

Speaker 1 Not in my country.

Speaker 1 This guy's out of his mind. What is he talking about? Women are sexting and having full-blown affairs.
Women do not even have phones. This is crazy talk.
This is crazy business.

Speaker 1 This guy is out of his gourd. Keep going.
I'm having good laugh over here. Okay, okay.
Cheating is cheating. If you feel that something's not cheating is not cheating.
Let me tell you something.

Speaker 1 Cheating is a way to a better marriage if you're a man, and cheating is

Speaker 1 not even a thing. I don't think there's a word for it in my country.
If a woman's doing it, I think it's called jail.

Speaker 1 It's called jail.

Speaker 1 Not quite right. Come on, guys.
Use your head. You got instinct.
You're feeling in your gut. Chances are, she's cheating on you.

Speaker 1 If you know the signs of a cheating wife, you can figure out what to do before the bad news hits you.

Speaker 1 Wait, hold on. Wait.
Figure out what what to do before the bad news hits you.

Speaker 1 If you find out your wife is cheating, you can find out what to do before you find out your wife is cheating. You can literally roll back the hands of time.

Speaker 1 I'm going to show you how to time travel right now. You're not like a paranoid husband.
This guy sounds like

Speaker 1 a mix between Alex Jones and Dr. Phil.

Speaker 1 And he's saying it as if all women are cheating. Women are out there sex messaging.
They're having full-blown affairs. They're literally

Speaker 1 sucking dick on the street corner. What's going on, Dave?

Speaker 1 Your wife's vagina is getting pounded right now in the gym, and you don't even know it. This guy sounds like he's been through many failed marriages, finally.
I'm just making an assumption, Frank.

Speaker 1 I'm sorry if I'm wrong. Without further ado, let's get into tip number one: that you might have a cheating wife.
You disappeared from her social media. There used to be pictures of you and her.

Speaker 1 Well, he does.

Speaker 1 I would say that Frank's probably right about that.

Speaker 1 If

Speaker 1 you are not on her social media anymore, and you're not. Now it's a new dude.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Now it's the mother. If you've been replaced by another guy on social media, your wife's probably having an affair.
With that guy.

Speaker 1 You probably also missed the divorce proceedings with the paperwork still in the mail. I mean, come on, Frank.
What are you talking about? Now, listen to how Frank talks about social media.

Speaker 1 This just cracks me up. I mean, vacations, daily stuff, grandkids, children.
Grandkids? Grandkids.

Speaker 1 She's got grandkids with another wife? With another man? Grandkids.

Speaker 1 If your wife has grandkids you don't know about, she's probably cheating on you.

Speaker 1 You don't say, Frank. Tell you it isn't.
So

Speaker 1 sudden, you're gone. Why is that? You're being ghosts.

Speaker 1 You're being ghosted. By your wife.
You're being ghosted. It's ghosted, Frank.
It's ghosted, not you're being ghosted. What is this? This is an episode of Casper.

Speaker 1 I know.

Speaker 1 If you have Nico on your your homepage,

Speaker 1 you're getting cheated on.

Speaker 1 Your wife is having an affair with a ghost dog.

Speaker 1 She's literally taking it up the ass from a dog that doesn't exist.

Speaker 1 Why is that? Well, she wants to appear single. She wants to appear that she's not having a relationship.
That's always a monster sign.

Speaker 1 If you get ghosts on social media, you're getting cheated on. Social media, chances are she wants to appear single and something's up.
Tip number two that your wife might be cheating at you.

Speaker 1 We were just on one? Yeah, we were cheating on.

Speaker 1 Okay, now we're going to check. I felt like we had like five different things in there.
This video is only four minutes long, by the way.

Speaker 1 But the second I started watching it, Hoadly, I was just like, I was sitting here at midnight last night, laughing out loud. I'm sure my children woke up because I was laughing out loud at this guy.

Speaker 1 These videos are, they're all precious. We're going to have to check in with Frank many times.
This is the beginning of a fruitful relationship with Frank. I love you, Frank.
Call me. 470-584-8449.

Speaker 1 Leave a message. Look at her cell phone, gentlemen.

Speaker 1 Now, if she's always had the ringer volume up on loud, which I'm sure she had for years, especially if you have kids and you're out at a restaurant, you're out at a function, she's going to want to hear that phone ring.

Speaker 1 And then all of a sudden,

Speaker 1 hold on.

Speaker 1 If your wife has ears, she's cheating on you. Wait, I mean,

Speaker 1 the assumption that

Speaker 1 you're what, like that all women want their phone on loud all the time.

Speaker 1 And then all of a sudden if she starts turning her ringer to silent to you in a restaurant? In a restaurant. I mean, all of all of a sudden she's courteous and she's cheating.

Speaker 1 If you're watching Ave Maria at the local orchestra and she's turned her phone off, she's fucked man.

Speaker 1 Call the divorce attorney. Quick, take a picture and post it to Facebook.
That's right. Post it to Facebook, the two of you, because you've been ghosts.

Speaker 1 I dated this girl, she never called me back. I got ghost.

Speaker 1 Ghosted.

Speaker 1 Put an ED back there, you fucked one.

Speaker 1 He's okay.

Speaker 1 Just let me continue because

Speaker 1 he's funny in and of himself. We probably don't even really make sure.
Notice that that phone has been on the silent mode for quite a while. So she switched.
There's a reason why.

Speaker 1 Because she doesn't want you asking questions. I thought he was going to say he doesn't want, she doesn't want you asked.

Speaker 1 If your wife doesn't want you,

Speaker 1 if your wife doesn't like you, it's likely you're being cheated on. She doesn't want you asking.
Just the audacity. I mean, this is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard.

Speaker 1 He says, if your wife has her ringer on and then she turns it off. That's like his personal story.
It is his personal story. Of course it is.
Look how charged up this guy is.

Speaker 1 I mean, again, he's been on steroids and cocaine since the 80s. He's been ghosts.
Yeah, you should see this guy. He is just like...
built like a rock house.

Speaker 1 He's from, I bet $1,000 he's from Chicago with that accent. Hi, guys.
Hi, guys. He sounds like my mom.
He's like the male version of my mom.

Speaker 1 So if that ringer is on the silent mode, chances are she's hiding something. And if you are at a function, she's hiding the ringtone because she doesn't want to hear it.
You're an idiot.

Speaker 1 Everyone turns on and off their ringer. That's not a thing.
It's not a thing. Mine's off right now in the studio.
If I am... Yeah, if you're cheating on you.
Mine's probably off. I can check that.

Speaker 1 You're cheating on me.

Speaker 1 If I turn off my ringer, if you're having an affair, I'm not saying that I am, but if you're having an affair,

Speaker 1 it's not about turning on and off the ringer. It's really not.
It's really not. You're missing the whole fucking point, Frank.

Speaker 1 It's about not calling them, you know, not making evidence whatsoever, right?

Speaker 1 You have a secret phone number, like 470-5848-449. Call me, Frank.
I want to talk to you live on there. If you are at a restaurant and you see her fidgeting on that phone a little bit, all right?

Speaker 1 She grabs it. You don't hear it ring.

Speaker 1 She feels the buzz. She feels the hum.
She knows she's getting her call in there. And then 10, 15 minutes, she's going to wait.
She's going to want to go to the bathroom.

Speaker 1 She's going to want to contact that person. Oh, let her take her phone.
Get her reaction out of that. See if she gets jumpy.
See if she gets fidgety. Tell her, just leave the phone right here.

Speaker 1 Go to the restroom. See if she gets jumpy.
See if she gets fidgety. Kidnap her.
Hold her hostage. They're at the restaurant.

Speaker 1 What a showman is. What a fuck.
Go to fuck. Oh.

Speaker 1 I cannot imagine the drama would be caused if I told Astrid to leave her phone at the table when she went to the bathroom for no particular reason except for my fucking paranoia.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I I would be like, okay. Yeah, that's crazy.
Weird. Holdie, I want you to leave your phone right there.
And if you get fidgety about it,

Speaker 1 I know you're cheating on me. That's great dinner time conversation, by the way.
You should do that at Christmas. He grabs it real quick.
Grabs it real quick. Yeah, I know.
Can you imagine this?

Speaker 1 Exactly happened to him.

Speaker 1 This whole thing happened to him. And only in hindsight did he realize that all of those things were signs that he was being cheated on.

Speaker 1 After he's had five years and six 20-year-old girlfriends to think about it. Yes.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 You'll watch it. And if she does, that's your chance to go through her phone and see who's calling her.
That's your chance to break the law right there.

Speaker 1 Number three days. Your wife might be cheating at you.
Number three. All of a sudden, she's at the gym every day.
She only used to go maybe one or two days a week.

Speaker 1 Frank, Frank, Frank, Frank, right.

Speaker 1 Right. It's all coming together now, Frank.
I starting to understand what exactly happened to you.

Speaker 1 Your wife wife was fucking the pool boy right in front of you. You were a trainer at the gym.
Exactly. Right in front of you.
And you were too busy at Hair Club for Men.

Speaker 1 That you didn't realize what was going on until it was too late. But that doesn't mean that every woman that goes to the gym is cheating on her husband.
That's a ridiculous connotation. Oh.

Speaker 1 Does connotation even make sense in that? Yes. Okay, thank you.
40 minutes, okay? In and out. Now all of a sudden, she's up the game.
She's there five days a week. Five days a week.

Speaker 1 She did go to the gym. She really didn't care what she looked like.
She had her frumpy clothes. Hey, hold on.
Just pause this for one second.

Speaker 1 Let me just say this. Clarify.
So if she was just going one or two days a week, she didn't give a shit. Shit about who she looked like.

Speaker 1 That's why she was going to the gym. Right, right.
To get fatter. You don't go at all at all.

Speaker 1 You don't give a shit what you look like. You're never going to.
By the way, going to the gym one or two days a week is a big fucking effort, right? It is. Yeah.

Speaker 1 To get out of the house and go to the gym. Yeah, absolutely.
First of all. And now he's saying.
And then maybe she got into it and likes it. Yeah, maybe she's feeling good about herself.

Speaker 1 Maybe she's a human being, Frank. Maybe she wants some self-respect.

Speaker 1 Maybe she wants to get out of the hole that you've dug her in the backyard to live. Maybe she's married to you.
Yeah, a true story. Frank.
No makeup, hair pulled up.

Speaker 1 Didn't give a crap what she looked like. Now all of a sudden, she's bought some new gym clothes.
She's got her makeup all dialed up.

Speaker 1 She has her own money. She's using a credit card.
She knows how to go. She knows how to pay a bill.

Speaker 1 This is is crazy. Signs.
Yeah, I know. Signs.
A woman is cheating on you. She learned how to drive a car.
She learned how to speak. Yeah.
She talks in sentences.

Speaker 1 She can write a text message.

Speaker 1 She uses the bathroom without permission.

Speaker 1 She gets out of bed before you tell her it's okay.

Speaker 1 She doesn't say yes when you tell her to put on her handcuffs.

Speaker 1 She speaks in public without

Speaker 1 approval. Yeah.
Hair is pretty. She's taking more time and getting ready to go to the gym, all right? There's a reason why.
She's trying to impress someone, but don't get too hung up on that.

Speaker 1 She could

Speaker 1 get too hung up on that part. Don't get hang up.
What you just said was the worst, was like the worst part. But don't get hung up on that part.
Has he got a fourth one? He's got a seventh one.

Speaker 1 Oh, okay.

Speaker 1 We're only halfway through. I'm sorry.
But it's just, it just gets funny. It's so funny.
I feel bad for people that believe it, though. Baby.
There have got to say baby like you're my wife.

Speaker 1 I'm sorry about that. That was so fucking rude.
You're cheating on Mastery. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And you're cheating on Joe.

Speaker 1 We've been busted. We've been having an affair this whole time.
In front of everybody. This whole time they thought we were doing a podcast.

Speaker 1 Her routine in the gym because she wants to impress somebody outside that gym.

Speaker 1 therefore she's not going to care what she looks like at the gym she's still up in her routine why because she's trying to impress somebody else that's what women do all of a sudden they find a guy might be a younger guy oh my god i'm a little bit overweight they're gonna get in there and they're gonna they're gonna pound it they're gonna pound it They're gonna pound it.

Speaker 1 It might be a younger guy. I mean, this is this guy's life story, literally.
This is literally, this guy is telling you what went on. What happened? Yeah, this is the case.
This is why

Speaker 1 started cheating on someone with,

Speaker 1 started cheating on him with someone from the gym that was younger and

Speaker 1 that would get up and he would, she would go to the bathroom and talk to him. You are spot on.

Speaker 1 This guy is so emotionally immature that the only way that he can deal with the emotions of what happened to him, which is unfortunate, Frank, if your wife really did it.

Speaker 1 Yeah, sorry about that. Sad times.
But now you're just so angry and bitter about it that the only thing you can do is go on YouTube and make public videos that showcase you and hot young women.

Speaker 1 Welcome. Yeah, welcome.
Hi.

Speaker 1 all i was waiting for him to break through a wall like the fruit punch guy

Speaker 1 the kool-aid

Speaker 1 to the brick wall

Speaker 1 gonna want to look their very best pay attention to that sign gentlemen number 40 your wife if your wife is pretty that's on the

Speaker 1 bad sign that's terrible and when you say pay attention gentlemen it sounds like frank you there's nothing you haven't paid attention to i mean being with you must be like 24 hour a day school monitoring or something Yeah.

Speaker 1 If she takes off her

Speaker 1 ankle monitor

Speaker 1 without giving you notice, you're in trouble. Yeah.
Wife might be cheating on you. So all of a sudden, she's not telling you what's going on in her life.
There's a disconnection.

Speaker 1 You know, a woman who is cheating, subconsciously, they disconnect from you. They're worried about the other person.
You're the last thing on their mind.

Speaker 1 So if you feel that disconnection, chances are, gentlemen, her mind's on someone else. Tip number five.
If you feel a disconnection from your wife, you have bigger problems.

Speaker 1 I would feel a disconnection from Frank if I was married to him.

Speaker 1 I feel a disconnection from Frank, and I'm just a, yeah, I'm just a guy listening on his, on his YouTube channel. I don't feel disconnected from him.
But I want you to hear. So

Speaker 1 I've left this whole thing intact, basically. So I want you to listen because there's a reason.

Speaker 1 He just said, if a woman stops paying attention to you, then you're in real trouble.

Speaker 1 But listen to a, we'll listen to a future point and see how why Frank is contradicting himself all through this video. I bet your wife is cheating on you.
All of a sudden, she's dressing a lot nicer.

Speaker 1 I don't care if it's for work, again, the gym, or going out with friends. Before, it used to be very casual.
Again, the gym. Yeah, again, the style.
Again, the gym.

Speaker 1 So we know that his wife

Speaker 1 met her

Speaker 1 mistress. Mister at the mistress.
Or mistress. Could have been a mistress.
You never know.

Speaker 1 Frank is really... He's so horrified.
Frank, maybe the woman just has some self-respect.

Speaker 1 Maybe she just wants to dress up nice. Did you ever think about that? No, Frank didn't think about that.
Because Frank has an emotional block right in his head. It's like a two-ton barbell

Speaker 1 sticking through Frank's spinal cord. He's Abdullah mum jumlada.
Flats, casual outfit, conservative top,

Speaker 1 nothing crazy. All of a sudden, guys, all of a sudden her dits are hanging out.
She's got cleavage. She's got nipple rings.

Speaker 1 Summer. She's wearing badge chats.
She's not wearing her overall prison uniform she's got a thong bikini that she wears to pick up the kids from school

Speaker 1 just went up that's the sign

Speaker 1 we got some heels some hot slacks maybe a nice shirt

Speaker 1 a little cleavage well guess what guys is that for you hell no she's trying to impress someone else tip number six is your wife might be cheating on you all of a sudden she's misgenerous

Speaker 1 you're getting some home cooked dinners you're eating random gifts.

Speaker 1 You're getting blowjobs at the dinner table. The mashed potatoes.
You're getting mashed potatoes left and right.

Speaker 1 You're getting a pinky in the asshole.

Speaker 1 That makes no sense. That makes no sense, Frank.
You just said that if she stops paying attention to you, if you feel disconnected,

Speaker 1 that's a sign. But now the sign is

Speaker 1 if she's paying attention to you,

Speaker 1 it's a sign. Ding, ding, ding.
That's right.

Speaker 1 You know, right before Frank's, one of Frank's ex-wives delivered him. I feel like this probably happened multiple times to Frank, actually.

Speaker 1 I feel like Frank is like a six-wife kind of guy, and they get younger each time he gets married. Totally.
I feel like right. Yeah, right.

Speaker 1 Larry King had nine wives. That's crazy.
Nine wives and nine wives.

Speaker 1 I feel like right before she handed him the divorce papers, she gave him a blowjob with a pinky in the ass, and he was like, wow, I've never had that before. That's great.

Speaker 1 By the way, why are you going to the gym so much?

Speaker 1 I noticed your phone was on silence. You got those hot slacks on.
Yeah. I've been seeing you wear those hot slacks.
I can see Frank's head just like struggling to figure out what's going on.

Speaker 1 You know, you were cheating on me? Really? All those silent messages, all that time at the gym,

Speaker 1 all the nipple-showing outfits you wore, all those times you went out with your friends and you forgot to tell me. I'm not silent.
Oh, my God, Frank. You're getting special treatment.

Speaker 1 And you haven't even argued. Well, why is that? And you haven't even argued.
Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 This guy. Living with this guy must be like just a roller coaster.
I I just was asking where

Speaker 1 did he does he profess to have any kind of degree or experience. Oh, no, no.

Speaker 1 No, not that I saw. Just the experience of being.
I'm only a couple of episode

Speaker 1 episodes? There's episodes. I'm only a couple episodes into Frank.
Like, Frank has 75 videos. Oh, my God.
And so there's so much more to dig in here.

Speaker 1 And so I have a feeling that in season two, we're at least three Frank episodes. Yeah, we got to.
I'm putting it on the calendar.

Speaker 1 We got to be three Frank episodes, whether that be a Patreon episode, a regular episode, whatever.

Speaker 1 This is just classic.

Speaker 1 Classic Frank. This is like classic douchebaggery.
This is the definition of a fucking lug nut.

Speaker 1 Why does he have so many videos and why does he think he's because he's talking about fashion and dining and grooming? He literally talks about grooming. Like, he cuts his own hair.
I mean, this is.

Speaker 1 Oh, wow. Okay, let's continue with this, and we'll get to more Frank videos at a different time.

Speaker 1 Gentlemen, she's guilty. She feels guilty, and she psychologically needs to make this up to you.
So, this makes them feel better by doing things for you. Tell Tim.

Speaker 1 I have a feeling, Frank, that whoever cheated on you

Speaker 1 had no urge to feel better about themselves. They were probably like, You're getting what you deserve, you chauvinistic fuck twi.
I mean, he's on the YouTube doing videos all day.

Speaker 1 Well, he's doing that to get back at all. The women have cheated on him to show them that he's doing fine.
Hi, I'm Frank.

Speaker 1 Welcome. Welcome.

Speaker 1 I feel great about myself.

Speaker 1 Welcome, welcome. Do you have low tea? Do you have low tea? Are you suffering from erectile dysfunction? Try out the Pravacour 3000 penis bump.

Speaker 1 This video is sponsored by Pravacour.

Speaker 1 Oh, hair jackrabbit vibrating cockream with the extender.

Speaker 1 With the extender. I love it.
No sign. If she's all of a sudden doing all this stuff for you, pay attention because that's a backdoor cheating sign.
Tip number seven that your wife is cheating on you.

Speaker 1 And guys, this is obvious as hell, but we're going to talk about it anyway. If she's upped her going-out game, whether it's with friends or at work, all right, that's a huge.

Speaker 1 If your wife gets friends, you're if you're in trouble. She's going to work every day, boom.

Speaker 1 I have a hard time believing that Frank ever let his wife out of the house for work.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Sure, you can have a job, honey.

Speaker 1 Polish my balls,

Speaker 1 polish my balls.

Speaker 1 You make this rather snappy, snappy, won't you? I have some very heavy thinking to do before 10 o'clock.

Speaker 2 Hi, cats and kittens. Rachel here.
Do you ever get the urge to speak endlessly into the void like Brian? Well, I've got just the place for you to do that. 212-433-3TCB.
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Speaker 1 You deserve mental health care that works with you, not against your budget.

Speaker 1 Red flag. That is the number one single, biggest red flag is more going out time.
They could come up with excuses that they have work-related duties to do after work.

Speaker 1 But if she's never done them and all of a sudden she's required to be there, I would definitely check.

Speaker 1 She's got a promotion.

Speaker 1 All of a sudden,

Speaker 1 her friends want to see her more.

Speaker 1 All of a sudden, she's making her own money, you're fucked. Yeah, she's got friends from the gym.
She's got friends

Speaker 1 from the gym and from life and school friends.

Speaker 1 If you allow her to have friends, you're screwed.

Speaker 1 Bury her back in her hole in the backyard. Make sure the ankle monitor has extra batteries.

Speaker 1 Charge that ankle monitor while she's in bed.

Speaker 1 Double check the GPS. Make sure it's working.

Speaker 1 Backup generator on the ankle monitor.

Speaker 1 Tie a backup generator to the ankle monitor.

Speaker 1 You could get ghost.

Speaker 1 Get ghost.

Speaker 1 It's like get lost, but get ghost.

Speaker 1 That's our new term. We're going to say, get lost, and somebody will be like, get ghost.

Speaker 1 That means take me off your Facebook page forever.

Speaker 1 If you're married and your wife takes you off her Facebook page and blocks you,

Speaker 1 you're probably getting cheated.

Speaker 1 Your wife blocks you on Facebook.

Speaker 1 She doesn't want to wear the handcuffs out to the grocery store. Goes to the gym and has friends.
Yeah. You're a shit crazy.
Fucked. Man.
Just deciding to go out. It doesn't happen, guys.

Speaker 1 That'd be just like you doing that. You know we can't do that as men because women going to pick up on that, you know, one, two, three.
But they think we're stupid, okay?

Speaker 1 Use the same psychology they use on us back at them.

Speaker 1 What in the good fuck is he talking about? I don't know. I just tried to

Speaker 1 block it out. No, I tried to follow him, but I couldn't tell.

Speaker 1 Come here, honey. Give me a kiss.
She wanted to give me a kiss.

Speaker 1 She wanted to smell if I had alcohol on my breath or if I had any type of perfume. Pussy on my breath.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 1 If If I had crack hole on my breath.

Speaker 1 By the way, if his wife is asking him if he has alcohol in his breath or wanting to smell his breath,

Speaker 1 he's had a problem before. He's had this problem.

Speaker 1 He's been sober five years.

Speaker 1 Five years after my fifth divorce. I learned my lesson after my 12th DUI.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's not the first thing you go to. No, no, it's not.

Speaker 1 There hasn't been an issue in the past. Yeah, and listen, if you need to come home without alcohol in your breath because that's a demand of your wife, you got bigger problems than what or not.

Speaker 1 She's cheating on you. You got to go to rehab, dude.

Speaker 1 It just makes no sense. This is not adding up, Frank.
You're telling your life story. She's made a home-cooked dinner for you.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 She's giving you a blowjob.

Speaker 1 But she needs to smell your breath. She needs to smell your breath first.
Frank, you're telling your story in a top 10 list, and it's so transparent. So transparent, man.

Speaker 1 You do the same thing to them. See if they get nervous.
See if they're giving you resistance, okay? Check out their see if they're giving you resistance. This is 2021.
Where are we living? In Iran?

Speaker 1 See if they give you resistance. See if they give you resistance.
Hit them over the head with a hammer.

Speaker 1 God.

Speaker 1 Whoa. Clean up the evidence.

Speaker 1 Call the state police. Tell them it was an accident.

Speaker 1 Your demeanor. You're going to pick up on that right away.
So we conclude today's video. Oh, thank God.

Speaker 1 I've been waiting.

Speaker 1 I don't know how much more I can take, Frank.

Speaker 1 Oh, my God, dude. That's the creepiest, creepiest, creepiest thing.
I mean, listen, it's great entertainment. You got to here.
It is.

Speaker 1 Frank Bernardo, for those of you that don't know, is an expert in all things over 50. He's an all things over 50 kind of guy.
He's going to tell you about grooming, style, the gym, women,

Speaker 1 love, low T, high T, under T,

Speaker 1 estrogen. Frank has lived a life and Frank wants to share those experiences with everybody, with all 1,200 of his subscribers.
And so he puts out these videos on a regular basis.

Speaker 1 And I just find them to be the funniest fucking thing I've ever seen. Not because I don't believe that men over 50 should live a life.
I mean, I'm right around the corner, right?

Speaker 1 Before I know it, I'll be there.

Speaker 1 He's the man to tell them how to do it. He's the man to tell them how to do it and with horrible advice to boost.
You ready? Let's get into this video. We're going to talk about dating in your 50s.

Speaker 1 Ready? Here we go. Gentlemen, in today's video, we're going to talk about dating over the age of 50.
Let me ask you a question.

Speaker 1 How many guys out there between the ages of 50 and 60 are hitting the dating scene again? I know. At this time of our life.

Speaker 1 I know. At this time of our lives.
Yeah, it's crazy. It's as if we're dead.
Hey, man, don't feel bad. There's millions and millions of men our age out there that are hitting the dating scene.

Speaker 1 Frank has done the research himself, and he knows that there's millions and millions of men over 50 that are hitting the dating scene right now as we speak. Nothing to be ashamed of.

Speaker 1 But let me ask you a question. Are you prepared to date? Do you remember how to date?

Speaker 1 Does your dick still work?

Speaker 1 Do you remember how to date? I mean, I get it. I get the premise of the question.
Yeah, yeah. But are you prepared? Like what? You got to get a kit together or something? Pack a back?

Speaker 1 Make sure you get a lunchbox. Get a lunchbox.
Get a backpack. Get ready for dating.

Speaker 1 Get a prescription for me. Back to dating time.
Back to dating. Here we go.
Do you remember how to look? Do you remember how to

Speaker 1 look?

Speaker 1 I mean, unless you're blind, I'm sure you remember how to look, right?

Speaker 1 Is that how it works? Dress. How's your grooming?

Speaker 1 How do you smell? I mean, it's a whole thing that he's checklist. Do you smell like a

Speaker 1 horse's throat? Don't do that. You've been taking care of your body.
Are you in shape? Are you ready to make a great first impression? Are you ready to make great first love? I'm here to show you how.

Speaker 1 Do you remember the mating ritual? Real quick. Get in shape.

Speaker 1 Get in shape. Shave your body.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's right. Get your Viagra.

Speaker 1 Get your nose hairs. Get a lunchbox together.
Sounds like Frank is going to climb Mount Everest, not go on a date.

Speaker 1 Well, guys, if you're...

Speaker 1 Well, by the way, if the intended purpose is to make people relax about going back out into the dating scene, Frank, you're doing the exact opposite, you're making people scared of going in the dating scene.

Speaker 1 I don't remember how to look. I don't remember how to look.
I'm not in shape. I haven't put deodorant on since 1983.

Speaker 1 I don't even know what a boner is. I'm living in a cave.
What do women look like? A vagina? What's that?

Speaker 1 You mean they're flower?

Speaker 1 Women are showing things above their ankles. Well,

Speaker 1 that's amazing.

Speaker 1 You're not doing all the above. Then you're already behind the eight ball.
Remember. Sounds like Frank knows what an eight ball is.
I'm just

Speaker 1 being honest about it. Women you're seeking at this age, it's not their first rodeo.
Their expectations, they're through the ceiling.

Speaker 1 They're all looking for their dream man, the last man, the man to finish out their life with.

Speaker 1 What are you talking about, Frank? They're ready to die.

Speaker 1 They would die with a man. They're looking for someone to come to their funeral.

Speaker 1 They're looking to go casket shopping with you.

Speaker 1 They're looking for you to pay for the retirement village. The fuck, Frank.
Come on. Give somebody some hope, man.

Speaker 1 Here's another big pitfall that you're going to run into. If you do get on the dating scene, what are you looking for? Probably a woman.
That's a good one. That's my guess.
Yeah. Or a man.

Speaker 1 Why not?

Speaker 1 You're looking for a younger woman, right?

Speaker 1 Okay, here we go.

Speaker 1 Now, Frank automatically starts going off the charts. Now, I want to preface this by saying, I've seen this video a couple times.
Frank is going to start talking about a younger woman in the

Speaker 1 by saying that if you're looking for if you're 60 and you're looking for a woman in their 50s, but we all know what Frank means. Frank means if you're 50 and you're looking for a 22-year-old.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Right. Because if you watch his videos, that's all he hangs around.
He's like, you know, girls in their 20s and 30s.

Speaker 1 So Frank is trying not to be creepy, but trust me, there's, there's a creep factor here. Come on, we're human in this video.
Come on, we're human. He says human? Yeah, human.
He also said a shame of.

Speaker 1 There's no ED on the end. It's like a shame of.
Don't be a shame of.

Speaker 1 So Frank goes, come on, you know, we're all looking for younger women. Come on, we're human.

Speaker 1 Come on, we're pedophiles.

Speaker 1 I mean, what the fuck, Frank? I get it. I understand, right?

Speaker 1 We're all looking for the younger model, right?

Speaker 1 When we're single.

Speaker 1 But it just starts to sound a little creepy when you put it like that. Come on, we're human or oomen.
It's like that guy from the Oatley commercial. It's like Malk.

Speaker 1 But for oomens.

Speaker 1 I'm going to show you just how hard it is to get the younger woman in this video. I'm going to set your expectations to where they should be in this video.

Speaker 1 There's a couple things about a YouTube video that you should know, these type of YouTube videos where you're giving information like this.

Speaker 1 You have to set up, first of all, you should make your intro much shorter than this. I mean, he's been already talking for two minutes and we haven't even started the video yet.

Speaker 1 Second of all, you set expectations about what you're going to deliver during the video, right? Like we set expectations that we're going to deliver nothing.

Speaker 1 So everybody is clear that if nothing comes out of it. Correct.
But Frank is now setting the expectation that he's going to show you, you know, how to date, how to groom, how to do all this.

Speaker 1 I promise you, in the next six minutes of this video, Frank is going to show you none of that. He's just going to start talking and go down a rabbit hole.
So just get prepared.

Speaker 1 I'm going to teach you how you get these and how you won't be disappointed chasing the younger girls. Don't miss it.

Speaker 1 Okay, now here's Frank's theme song, which is like

Speaker 1 if you could just see the beginning of it. I mean, I'm going to put it right up here in a little box right here.
So if you're seeing this little box right here, go to YouTube.

Speaker 1 What's that? Is it metal? It's metal, but it's more like Foo Fighters type bullshit, right? But it's not Foo Fighters, I can guarantee you. I don't know of it.
Foo Fighters cover it.

Speaker 1 If you want a date when you're 50 years old, yeah, Frank's gonna show you how.

Speaker 1 If you want the dance right in your face, yeah, Frank's gonna show you how.

Speaker 1 No erection, no problem. Frank's gonna show you how.

Speaker 1 I mean, this is something straight out of 2001, right? This is like

Speaker 1 Limbiscuit type bullshit.

Speaker 1 What are you waiting for? Get out there and live your life. Yeah, get to the bars.
Hit on younger, attractive waitresses.

Speaker 1 It'll never fail.

Speaker 1 You'll never fail if you don't. But I'm never going to tell you.
That's right.

Speaker 1 I can't tell you because I have the inability to do it. You're going to have to buy my kit.

Speaker 1 I practiced this video seven times in front of the mirror. Still don't know what the fuck I'm talking about.
I'm just angry my wife left me for the pool boy.

Speaker 1 Oh my God, such bad music. So bad.

Speaker 1 What's going on, everybody?

Speaker 1 Wow!

Speaker 1 Right. I got scared last night when I was listening on the headphones.
I was like, whoa!

Speaker 1 Don't yell at me, Frank. Because he's like, he's got this little opening and then he comes right at you and his face is like, what's up, everybody? Welcome to the video.

Speaker 1 If this is your first time here, my name is Frank Bernardo. This channel is gear.
Okay, Frank, you already said welcome to the video a couple times earlier.

Speaker 1 And I know that, you know, you're just trying to put it all together. And I've done the same thing.
I'm guilty of it, right? Saying welcome and hello a couple different times.

Speaker 1 But you don't need to welcome people to the video when they're three and a half minutes in, Frank. Don't do that.
Everybody got distracted. Yeah, call me, Frank.
I'll consult with you.

Speaker 1 I'd love to have you on the show, actually. If you somehow have seen this video, I'd love to have you on the show at the commercial break on Instagram.
Hit me up on DM.

Speaker 1 All guys out there 50 and above who want to up their game, look and feel better about themselves. Who want to up their cock

Speaker 1 about themselves in grooming fitness, fashion, and lifestyle? Grooming, fitness, fashion, and lifestyle. Yeah.
Guys, before we get into this video, you know the drill. Oh, my God, Frank.

Speaker 1 We're already like, we're six and a half minutes in. Can we already get to the video? He's made us a promise.
We're getting to the drill. We don't know the drill.

Speaker 1 We don't know the drill because Frank just keeps on saying we're getting to the drill. Like, let's get started.
Let's get started. Let's get started.
You You know the drill. You know the drill.

Speaker 1 No, I don't know the drill. I don't know.
You haven't told me. Come on, get to it.

Speaker 1 If you found this information useful, give it a thumbs up. Subscribe so you don't miss more videos in my series of dating over 50.

Speaker 1 So, gentlemen, I just wanted to put together a quick hit video for you.

Speaker 1 Just so I can save you lots. Frank, if you...

Speaker 1 A quick hit video. A quick hit video that's already six and a half minutes in.

Speaker 1 You've welcomed us four times. You've promised us what you're going to tell us.
You've told us what the story is. You've told us to subscribe to your channel.
Now, let's get to the content.

Speaker 1 Come on, Frank.

Speaker 1 I'm so interested. How do men under 50, over 50, get that 20-year-old woman they're looking for?

Speaker 1 Time, a lot of aggravation, a lot of embarrassment, and to save you a lot of humiliation, because these are all. I'm going to save you humiliation by doing it for you.

Speaker 1 I'm going to be humiliated for you. All the things that you're going to incur, you know, when you're looking for a younger woman.
So let's set some parameters right here.

Speaker 1 When I say younger woman, let's go realistically here. 10 years younger? That's a good number? Frank, we know what number you're really talking about.
It's 30 years younger.

Speaker 1 Yeah. No man in his 50s or 60s who's like Frank is sitting there going.
Who's subscribed to this channel? Who's subscribed to this channel? That's right. Good one, Chris.
High five. All right.

Speaker 1 I like that. Yeah.
Catch us on YouTube. Catch out that high five on YouTube.

Speaker 1 Welcome to the video. Welcome to the video.

Speaker 1 Welcome to the, it's like a Dr. Phil show.

Speaker 1 He just keeps going to break. Never get to the point.

Speaker 1 You're right. People who have subscribed to this video, I can guarantee you when you say younger woman, what is in their head is not somebody in their 50s.
It is somebody in their 20s or maybe 30s.

Speaker 1 Maybe 30s.

Speaker 1 Let's say you're a man 60, so you're looking for a 50-year-old. Come on, Frank.
Don't bullshit us. First and foremost, if you can get a girl 10 years younger, God bless you.
You're doing quite well.

Speaker 1 If you can get a girl five years younger, you're doing quite well. All right so you're going if you can get a girl 40 years younger you're doing awesome

Speaker 1 there's a gold star yeah

Speaker 1 you're my hero

Speaker 1 after that younger woman how hard is it how small i don't know how hard why do you have to go younger that's what she said what's that why do you have to go younger why do you have to go younger why can't you go older well he explains later on in the video why you can't go older

Speaker 1 can you get her You can,

Speaker 1 but it's hard. And this is why it's hard.
Let's reverse this. You're on a dating site and let's just say a woman 10 years older than you clicks on your dating site and she says, you know what?

Speaker 1 I find you interesting. I find you sexy.
How do you feel?

Speaker 1 What? She says, I find you interesting.

Speaker 1 I wish that opening line would come my way when I was in dating. I find you interesting and sexy.

Speaker 1 About that. How do you feel about a woman 10 years older than you? Looking at you, coming after you.
Fuck that. She's close to the grave.
I don't want to have anything to do with her.

Speaker 1 I'm not going casket shopping with that old witch. If you're subscribed to this video, and you can get any woman, we're talking any age.
You're doing well.

Speaker 1 If you get something with a vagina, I consider that a plus section. Yeah.
But hey, or a penis. Who knows? Who knows what? Oh, yeah.
Listen, I think this advice pretty much,

Speaker 1 this kind of advice, this kind of clarity from a man with such wisdom transcends sexual preference. It doesn't matter.
Transgender,

Speaker 1 gay, straight, whatever it is, Frank's advice is stuff you can take to the bank. You can't.
Consider it gold.

Speaker 1 Ew, you get it? What's your thought process? Are you going to respond to her? Are you going to say, fuck no?

Speaker 1 Fuck no, you old hag.

Speaker 1 If some woman texted me and said, I find you interesting and sexy, and I went, fuck no.

Speaker 1 What if I could just see Frank at the bar, like at the bar, and he's got, you know, these 20-year-old waitresses just basically taking his money right out of his hand, you know, and straight tipping them a hundred dollars at a time because that's who frank is and that's how i get younger women right and then some old lady comes up and goes wow frank i've been watching i find you sexy and interesting fuck no get out of here get out of here you old hag who do you think i am i'm frank fernardo

Speaker 1 have you seen my youtube channel i have 600 subscribers and 400 videos

Speaker 1 All highly produced. I spent 10 grand a piece on those videos to get a camera crew and everything.

Speaker 1 And the cover band from the Foo Fighters. Yeah, and the cover band.
Yeah, that's right. And the Foo Fighters lookalike band.

Speaker 1 I wonder how we licensed that music. Like, you know,

Speaker 1 YouTube's very strict about that stuff. I wonder what song that actually is.
I'll look into that. It could have been created

Speaker 1 for Frank. Yeah.
Yeah, I guess it could. Like an out-of-work band from the 2000s.
And Frank's like, can you guys get back together and do that one hit that was awesome?

Speaker 1 I want that to be my theme song. Because Frank was 30 back then.

Speaker 1 She's too old. I don't want anything to do with that.
I don't want anything to do with that dried-up vagina.

Speaker 1 What do you got going on in there, Coblabs? Gross?

Speaker 1 I want to get with his hot tail right here. That's probably the response you're going to do, right? A 70-year-old coming after you and you're 60? I don't want anything to do with that.

Speaker 1 Jeez, okay, Frank, we get the point. God damn.

Speaker 1 Make everyone feel warm and fuzzy.

Speaker 1 I mean, please, Frank, you're not dead. You're 70s.
Like,

Speaker 1 fucking Christ. What dating advice do you give to those who are 70s?

Speaker 1 You're dead. Don't bother.

Speaker 1 Oh, my God. I think that probably half of the 1,200 subscribers are doing exactly what we're doing.
What we're doing. Yeah, I would imagine that there's many other podcasts

Speaker 1 that have Frank on the radar.

Speaker 1 It's just too good. It's too good.
He's setting up jokes every five seconds, and you just can't help.

Speaker 1 And you get that. What do you think that woman 50 year old is thinking when you click on her dating site that you like her, that you find her interesting? What do you think she's saying?

Speaker 1 She's probably

Speaker 1 really analyzing Frank. I mean, Frank.

Speaker 1 What she's thinking is, oh my God, a man my age is actually not looking at 20 year olds. He wants to have

Speaker 1 a meaningful relationship, possibly. But here's something that I would suggest to Frank even before we get to the profile clicking on.
And that's how do you set up a profile?

Speaker 1 I mean, if you're of a certain age, how, I mean, that would have been helpful to have maybe a little tutorial on that. You know what?

Speaker 1 I think you and I should do a show where we combat some of Frank's bullshit. Right.
We should do a seven signs of a healthy relationship that you're not being cheated on.

Speaker 1 And then, you know, how to date in your,

Speaker 1 you know, whatever, 30s or 40s. Listen, here's the point.
Frank is like, Frank has made us a bunch of promises at the beginning of this video.

Speaker 1 We're already through with any of them. We're already seven minutes, six or seven minutes into this, and he has yet to talk about any of them.

Speaker 1 All he's doing is giving his opinion about what would happen if a 70-year-old decided to click on his profile. Not your profile, his profile.
Because one thing Frank is very transparent.

Speaker 1 If Frank is saying it, it means he feels it, right? Not that the whole world feels it, but that he feels it. Okay.

Speaker 1 You think she's calling up her girlfriends?

Speaker 1 Oh, Allison, guess what?

Speaker 1 A 60-year-old after me.

Speaker 1 Do you think a 20-year-old is doing that? Guess what? I got this old hags giving me $100 of pop every time he comes to the bar.

Speaker 1 You know that guy with the greasy hair

Speaker 1 and he's wearing.

Speaker 1 Says he knows Foo Fighter 2. He's wearing the Tommy John jeans.

Speaker 1 He's got that band that follows him around playing music all the time.

Speaker 1 Frank just has a band behind him, like the mariachi band, but like the old Foo Fighters, like the cover band. I'm on a Getting Complete the Moon.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 hey guys can you play my theme song real quick i could there's a hot girl over there i'm gonna walk into the room with my tight jeans and my my muscle shirt

Speaker 1 my hair slicked back i'm wearing drakar noor

Speaker 1 oh remember drakar i do what a scourge on the earth yeah i don't even think it exists anymore does it it must there must be somebody with an old bottle of jakar if you've got a bottle of jakar can you please send it to me i'd like to remember how it smells because I remember that my friend got his, like, I was 12 or 13 years old, and my friend Philip got a bottle of Jakar from his parents.

Speaker 1 But I didn't wear cologne because my parents didn't give us cologne, right? And that's that we couldn't, it's just that we didn't. Yeah.
And like, we sprayed that shit on it.

Speaker 1 I remember young guys doing that around the age of that's right. We thought that it was like a light for insects, like it was a magnet.

Speaker 1 What it really was was a force field against getting laid. Exactly.
It was like, whoa, whoa, that is really strong.

Speaker 1 You stay over there and I'll talk. Yeah, that smells like donkey picks.
What is that?

Speaker 1 Did you rub bear shit on yourself? Because I don't know. It smells a little weird.
That's Jakarner.

Speaker 1 I never even know how to say it. Jakarnuer.

Speaker 1 I can't believe it. It's my lucky day.
I got a 60-year-old jumping for joy. She's calling family members.
Do you really think that that's happening? Do you really think that she's getting excited? No.

Speaker 1 But if you are a good-looking man,

Speaker 1 why are you throwing in the family members?

Speaker 1 He's calling family members. Frank's just like over-exaggerating to make a point here.
But the truth is, it doesn't matter what age you are and what age you're going after.

Speaker 1 If you're excited about someone, you're excited about someone. Exactly.
Doesn't matter how old they are. Interesting, sexy, sounds like a good starting point.
Doesn't matter. Yeah, absolutely.

Speaker 1 I agree with you 100%.

Speaker 1 That takes care of himself.

Speaker 1 You might get a response. But how many guys our age look apart, are in shape? You better be spot on to even

Speaker 1 gross. This is all gross.
It's all so gross. You better be spot on.
You better have a rock-hard penis the second you walk in the door. Muscle shirt, totally.
That's right.

Speaker 1 Absolutely, Holy. You do your testosterone regimen.

Speaker 1 Yeah, double up on your testosterone regimen. Take two of Viagra.
That's spot on. That's spot on.
Yep, you better have it. You better shave every hair off your body.

Speaker 1 You better look like a 20-year-old porn star when you get into the bedroom so she knows you're rock hard and ready.

Speaker 1 How excited she's going to call her friends when she finds out you can get a full erection.

Speaker 1 Family,

Speaker 1 he can get a full erection.

Speaker 1 No penis bump or anything.

Speaker 1 He's not a cat.

Speaker 1 The only downside is there's a huge grease stain on my pillow. Yeah, there is.
Hey, listen, you know, you give a little, you take a little.

Speaker 1 You can't do that, Frank Bonato. It's against the rules.
Read the rules. Read the rules, Frank.
Get that woman to respond to you. You know what I like to compare this to?

Speaker 1 How many of you gentlemen out there have a business? Did you ever send out mail? Oh, my God. We still haven't answered one question.

Speaker 1 He still hasn't answered one question about how you prepare yourself. He said you better be spot on.
What exactly does that mean? You told him to get in shape. What do you expect?

Speaker 1 Everyone's just going to get up and start lifting weights. They don't have a fucking life.

Speaker 1 They're going to start spending all day at the gym, at the hairstylist, making videos about my ex-wife cheating on me. I mean, like, come on, Frank.
Mailers. Let's just say you sent out 100 mailers.

Speaker 1 If you get one. Mailers? I sent out mailers.
What are you talking about? What kind of business do you own?

Speaker 1 Laundry. A pizza.

Speaker 1 A pizza place.

Speaker 1 A dominoes. Yeah.
Mailers only work very, very strategically these days.

Speaker 1 You put a picture of Frank Bernardo on there naked.

Speaker 1 You're going to get everyone to open it to see what's in that package. Look who's mailing me.
Yeah, look who's mailing.

Speaker 1 It's Frank Fernardo with the erection.

Speaker 1 One response out of 100 mailers, you did real good. That's a law of average.
I like to compare this dating stuff to sending out mailers.

Speaker 1 For every hundred girls you click on that are 10 years younger than you. If you get one of those women to respond, you did a good job.
Oh my gosh. Okay.

Speaker 1 Got it. But what tell us

Speaker 1 how we do it? How do we do it? You promised us.

Speaker 1 And guess what? It's just a response. It's not a date.
Now you got to work it and convince them from that point.

Speaker 1 What makes you at 60 so different,

Speaker 1 so special than any 50-year-old that day can get? What are you talking about? You are talking in fucking spiral. He's spiraling.
Yeah, he's way spiraling. And

Speaker 1 the part that makes me upset, Frank, is that you probably paid a production company a lot of money to record this video and edit it for you, right?

Speaker 1 I could be wrong about that, but I'm just assuming the quality of the video. And we have friends that do this, and it's like $10,000 for three videos, right? And so that's

Speaker 1 $3,300 of video. And no one has told you that you're just rambling on and you're not getting to the fucking point, right? You get a response.
It's just a response. Now you got to work really hard.

Speaker 1 Now you got to convince them you're not an axe murderer. Contact a direct mailer.
Okay, so tell them how to convince.

Speaker 1 When you send out mailers for dates these days, you get very little response. I don't know what's happening.
Back in the 80s, I used to get a ton of pussy just sending out mailers.

Speaker 1 I'd put a picture in my face and I'd say,

Speaker 1 I'd say, no low-type here. And I'd just...
Call now. Call now.

Speaker 1 1-800-Frankie V.

Speaker 1 You see how hard this is? No, I don't because you're not telling me.

Speaker 1 You see how the window's real small? What I'd like for you guys to do is... Oh, here we go.
Okay, an action plan.

Speaker 1 Here we go. An action.

Speaker 1 You ready? I would love for you to set realistic goals. Okay, I'm with you.
Let's go. Let's set some goals.
Okay, here it comes. Realistic expectations.
Yeah. Okay.

Speaker 1 You could start out at 50 on the young side, but maybe go. This is going to sound crazy.
Maybe go 50. 60.
You lost me again, Frank.

Speaker 1 Oh, my God, Frank. You just keep on giving me the same example.
First of all, we know you're not talking about 50-year-olds. You're talking about 20-year-olds.
First of all, second of all,

Speaker 1 what is some magic number between 50 and 60? Why do you keep on saying that? There's some magic number between 50 and 60. There's a small window.
Let's set some goals. You're not doing any of it.

Speaker 1 I haven't learned a shit. Oh.
I haven't learned a fucking thing, Jackie Weebo.

Speaker 1 He hasn't even told us what brand to use for like a shaving tool. That's right.
I mean, just start there, Frank. Give me something.
Give me something. What kind of testosterone should I be taking?

Speaker 1 Give me something. I can tell myself.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 She's ready to hook her dad up with Frankie B, but Frankie B so far hasn't given us jack shit.

Speaker 1 Except told us that if a woman checks her phone at dinner, she's cheating on you.

Speaker 1 And the 50-year-old woman that's getting hit on by a 60-year-old is going to call her parents and tell her, hey, you, mom.

Speaker 1 I got a 60-year-old on the hook.

Speaker 1 I can die in peace.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's great, Jill. He's my forever man.

Speaker 1 That's great, Jill. All I wanted for you was a 60-year-old man.
Now I can die in the middle. I've done it.

Speaker 2 Okay, you're probably wondering why I, Rachel, have taken over the voice duties at TCB. It's pretty simple.
Astrid asked me to shut Brian up, even for a minute.

Speaker 2 Well, lovely Astrid, your wish is my command. Do you want to help Astrid too?

Speaker 1 You know you do.

Speaker 2 Leave a message for her or me or Chrissy at 212-433-3TCB. That's 212-433-3822.
You can be on the show too. Mm-hmm.
Just call and say something. Anything.
Or text us and we'll text you right back.

Speaker 2 Promise. Then head over to tcvpodcast.com and get your free sticker.
It's your constitutional right to a sticker and we must abide. You get the point.

Speaker 2 Follow us on Instagram at thecommercial break and watch all the episodes on video at youtube.com slash thecommercial break. Best to you and Astrid.
Especially Astrid.

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Speaker 1 55. That opens up a 15-year window.
Can you find good-looking, beautiful women in their 60s, early 60s? You can.

Speaker 1 and here take it from me you could find women in their 60s that are far better looking and in far better shape than women in their 50s they're

Speaker 1 take it from frank

Speaker 1 you can take this advice to the bank what advice i don't know because he hasn't given anybody

Speaker 1 take it from frank

Speaker 1 There are hot women in their 60s, 70s, and 80s. It sounds like a radio station.
He's giving a there's a radio contest.

Speaker 1 Hot women from the 60s, 70s, and 80s.

Speaker 1 We're playing all day hits from yesterday and today on Frankie V.

Speaker 1 Fashion, lifestyle. Fucking grooming.
Cheating. Grooming.

Speaker 1 Dating women in their 50s.

Speaker 1 Out there. There are women out there that take care of themselves.
So open up. There are women out there that take care of themselves.
You don't say. You are such a fucking chauvinist, Frank.

Speaker 1 Count the parameters because you might find the woman of your dreams in her early 60s. You notice how his voice raises the more bullshitty he gets?

Speaker 1 I'm also confused because I feel like in the very beginning he was saying just target the 50-year-old. He did.
Now he's

Speaker 1 going to open it up. Yeah, he said

Speaker 1 you want to date the younger women because we're just human. That's all we're going to look at is the younger women.
Now we're going to open it up. Now we're not going to go 10 years.

Speaker 1 We're going to go 15 years one way or the other. So you can get down to 45 or you can get down to 70.
All of averages is older than that. Oh, my God, Frank.

Speaker 1 You're just dying you're killing me bud hey that's only two years older than you just open up everything and you're gonna save yourself so frank is basically doing a complicated math problem with women and he's teaching us here online how to do algebra with mat with women's agents

Speaker 1 and still i don't know what the answer is because i never figured out what the question is

Speaker 1 a lot of disappointment from not getting a date and let's just say

Speaker 1 You are able to land that date. How hard do you think it is to get a second date with a 50-year date?

Speaker 1 Oh my God, Frank, you just, you got to give people advice here, but you got to step in with some actual like advice.

Speaker 1 You're assuming that someone can get a first date based on the non-information that you've given them so far. They've opened up age rate.

Speaker 1 Basically, what they have to do is they have to take and make a graph chart, put their age right here and go 15 ways this, 15 years this way, or 15 years that way.

Speaker 1 That's the advice you've given them so far, Frank, is a math equation.

Speaker 1 Again, you better be spot on.

Speaker 1 What does that mean? What does it mean to be spot on?

Speaker 1 Everything has got to work. It's got to be perfect for that woman to jump up to that level.
What level? I don't know. What are you talking about? What happened?

Speaker 1 Where are we on the ground? I bet Frank is like, for a woman to jump up on this cock, you got to be spot on. By level, I mean my bald penis.

Speaker 1 And I've been working with the pump every day.

Speaker 1 Raising my tea and raising my pee. You know what I'm saying, Chrissy?

Speaker 1 That's advice you can take to the bank. There you have it.
I look how he says it. There you have it.
No, there you have nothing, Frank. All right.

Speaker 1 And a lot of women, you know, a lot of guys think just because they got the money, you know, they start flashing the money.

Speaker 1 I would not go there because there's a lot of women that are, they're on to that game. Oh, they're onto the game of a rich guy spreading it, showering them with money.
I'm on to you.

Speaker 1 You want to take me to the mail dies this weekend? I am on to you. No, sir.
I'm not going to be tricked by that one again. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Do you know how many? Nice gifts.

Speaker 1 Yuta. Good dinner.
That's right. I had a man who bought me a yacht once, and I will not be fooled again.

Speaker 1 I will not be gifted one more Mercedes.

Speaker 1 You got me.

Speaker 1 I will not be gifted one more Mercedes. That's right.
It will not happen. Okay, they're not going to be bought.
So I would. There are women out there that will, okay?

Speaker 1 But the majority of them

Speaker 1 won't.

Speaker 1 I contact you. So keep it on.

Speaker 1 I'm going to

Speaker 1 disagree with you, Frank.

Speaker 1 I'm going to disagree with you, bud.

Speaker 1 And that works both ways, by the way.

Speaker 1 Your money,

Speaker 1 especially if you do meet a woman 50 years old or, you know, 10 years younger than you,

Speaker 1 don't start talking about money. Don't start talking about what you got.
You're trying to buy them. You're trying to impress them.
Let them ask you when they're ready.

Speaker 1 How much money do you make?

Speaker 1 How much money do you have?

Speaker 1 You're rolling right now. This is stick-up.

Speaker 1 You thought it was a second date. You were so spot on I gave you a a second date, but now it's just a hold up.

Speaker 1 What the fuck are you talking about, Frank?

Speaker 1 Oh, that's really cool.

Speaker 1 You drank too much Red Ball this morning or whatever it is you do, man.

Speaker 1 This guy has non-linear thought. This is literally word vomit right now.
Because what they're going to do is they're going to feel you out. They're going to ask a lot.

Speaker 1 Oh, I bet they're going to feel you out, Frank. They're going to feel you right out the door.
Yeah. A lot of questions.
They're tricky. They're sneaky.
They're women. Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 Whoa.

Speaker 1 Frank, Frank, Frank, Frank, Frank. Frank, what are they even being sneaky about? Frank.

Speaker 1 They're sneaky.

Speaker 1 If you're giving them money, they're going to take it and use it. They're sneaky.
They're women.

Speaker 1 They're going to ask you questions. Trust me.
I know a lot of women and they ask questions. Yeah.
When they say brains. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Trust me. Watch this.
They walk in the door for the second date. First, they're going to ask a question like

Speaker 1 how is your day? Don't say a fucking word. It's a trap.

Speaker 1 They know you have money when they ask you those kind of questions. When you say, my day was great, they're going to know you're loaded.
But they're on to you. They're on to you.

Speaker 1 They know you're about to give them money.

Speaker 1 Frank, you're out of control, bud. First of all, I want to say, you're kind of cute, Frank, and kind of funny until you make comments like, they're women.
Yeah, they're sneaky. They're women.

Speaker 1 You're a douche. So there you go.
You're Frank. You're Frank.
You're Bernardo. You're a douche.
Yeah. Come on, Frank.
Leave that kind of shit out of the videos. They're going to surprise you.

Speaker 1 Sneak attack. Sneak attack.

Speaker 1 Bam!

Speaker 1 Bam. Bam.

Speaker 1 They're going to jump through your window

Speaker 1 at all hours of the night and day and surprise you with questions

Speaker 1 to give you that money back that you gave them. They're going to come in with the keys to the Mercedes and go, I'm on to you.

Speaker 1 You're going to be like, whoa.

Speaker 1 That shit didn't work. I was was going to give her that Mercedes.
She jumped right in the window. Scared the hell out of me.
Stink attack. Stinky.

Speaker 1 I've had two heart attacks already from women jumping out of the rafters.

Speaker 1 They just come out of nowhere and ask you a question.

Speaker 1 Yeah, how was your day? Wow!

Speaker 1 But he said specifically, don't tell them. Let them ask you questions.
But then when they ask you questions, was that when you're supposed to back off? Or I don't know.

Speaker 1 Where are we on the ground? I'm having a hard time following Frank here. I don't know.
I'm trying to keep up, Frank. I really am.
This is how they do it.

Speaker 1 But if you're a guy that presses money, money, money, money, you're going to be gone. All right.
Because you're going to be gone. You're going to be gone.
What?

Speaker 1 I don't think he said you're going to be good. No, you're going to be gone.

Speaker 1 You're going to be good. No, he said you're going to be gone, which is the opposite of what's going to happen.

Speaker 1 Yeah, come on, Frank. You know, anybody wants to have a partner that's stable.
And that's, I mean,

Speaker 1 if you have no money, you're in there

Speaker 1 you're one step ahead of the game if you're living in your ex-wife's apartment like i am

Speaker 1 you're good

Speaker 1 but if you got plenty of money you're fine

Speaker 1 if you have a yacht and two cars women are gonna go i'm on to you they're sneaky they're sneaky

Speaker 1 they can tell when you got money.

Speaker 1 They're going to leave real quick.

Speaker 1 They're going to be gone. Yeah, you'll never get that second date if they know you have money, so hide it.

Speaker 1 Dress like a homeless person, but you know,

Speaker 1 a homeless person that smells good with muscles.

Speaker 1 Oh,

Speaker 1 my God.

Speaker 1 It makes no sense. It makes no sense.
I love Frank. These are the best videos that I could go on all day on.
I'm trying to buy them, and they're going to be on to that.

Speaker 1 So all I'm trying to say here is

Speaker 1 he's trying to wrap it up. What? Yeah.
What are you trying to say, Frank? Please give us a clue.

Speaker 1 If you open up your parameters, okay, you're going to get dates. If you pin it to just 10 years younger,

Speaker 1 guys, you're going to be disappointed. You're going to be frustrated.
Oh, my God. So the whole thing is about the date range.

Speaker 1 Date range and surprise questions and sneak attacks. And money.
And money.

Speaker 1 Because you're not going to get a lot of dates. So, all I'm trying to do is get you to open up your eyes, be realistic.
Okay. Don't be so hell-bent on finding someone 10, 12 years younger than you.

Speaker 1 You might find someone your age, two years younger, two years older, that's going to work and it's going to be very compatible for you. So

Speaker 1 I hope that kind of be so hellbent. Don't be so hell-bent

Speaker 1 on finding someone your age.

Speaker 1 Oh, get your mind straight on, especially if you're new to the dating scene. All right.

Speaker 1 Trust me, Frank's been on the dating scene for a long time.

Speaker 1 He has the ends of them. Yeah, and there's a reason why because he hasn't learned a fucking thing.

Speaker 1 Guys,

Speaker 1 when you first get on there, yeah, we're going to go attack the younger women, and you're going to be done.

Speaker 1 Attack

Speaker 1 with your money and your questions.

Speaker 1 Disappointed. So take it from me open up your parameters get some dates uh and just have fun with it so guys that concludes today's video oh my god thank god thanks thanks for nothing

Speaker 1 yeah that was a quick hit video just doing a quick hit video real quick get out your graph paper 22 minutes of your time

Speaker 1 Do you have your projector? And I don't mean the kind that actually projects. I mean like the projector for math problems.
Remember? Yes, yes, the circle. Yes, the circle.

Speaker 1 Can you get out your calculus calculator? Yeah, you're going to need it. If you found it informational.
Well, I found nothing informational, Frank. I found it highly entertaining.

Speaker 1 Ready? There we go. So gentlemen, in today's video, we're going to go over five more sneaky signs that your wife just might be cheating on your ass.

Speaker 1 Whoa.

Speaker 1 Woo!

Speaker 1 What are you waiting for out there? Get it done.

Speaker 1 I just imagine that Frank is like, this is his, like, when his phone goes off in the morning.

Speaker 1 Is this the song that wakes him up and he's like, what am I waiting for? I gotta go get it done. I don't know what it is, but I'm gonna get it done today.
I haven't worked in 12 years.

Speaker 1 I'm gonna go polish. I'm going to go polish my Corvette again outside with my shirt off.

Speaker 1 Oh, God. You just got out of this song.
I'm so excited. What's going on? What's going on, guys?

Speaker 1 I love that in the last part. He said, cheating on your ass.
Cheating on your ass. Wait, Frankie, this is so transparent that Frankie has been cheated on in this manner.

Speaker 1 Anything that Frankie says in any of these videos, I just imagine that Frankie has an ex-wife that did exactly what he's saying you should look out for because how else would he know this information, you know?

Speaker 1 Yeah, and it's so specific. If she takes out her phone at Ruby Tuesdays on a Thursday night at 7:45 p.m.
in booth number three,

Speaker 1 she's cheating on you

Speaker 1 in Rosdale, California.

Speaker 1 If you've got David Thompson, the pool boy, cleaning your pool every Monday and Wednesday,

Speaker 1 and you working, and those are your workout times.

Speaker 1 If she goes to the gym, if she, remember that was one, right? If she goes to the gym,

Speaker 1 she goes to the gym.

Speaker 1 Half the women in America. What are you talking about?

Speaker 1 If this is your first time here, my name is Frank Bernardo. If you're a virgin, call me up.

Speaker 1 This channel is geared for all guys. I'll be gentle.
All guys over the age of 50 who want to up their game look and feel better about themselves in grooming, fitness, fashion, and lifestyle.

Speaker 1 How many more things can you focus on, Frankie? Like, it's just stick to one. Grooming, fitness, fashion.
Grooming, fashion, focus, lifestyle, photography, theme parks,

Speaker 1 Mediterranean cuisine,

Speaker 1 ring lights, cameras, televisions, soundproofing, guitars.

Speaker 1 Yeah. and chairs.
I'm just now just naming things in the studio,

Speaker 1 lots of wires,

Speaker 1 fire hazards.

Speaker 1 Remember the time the panel came down? Yes, I do, or the fan was falling apart, screws were falling from the fan.

Speaker 1 Oh, there's probably that kid who you guys are fucking dicks. I hope you die in your studio.

Speaker 1 I hope your fan decavitates you.

Speaker 1 Woo!

Speaker 1 It's true. My son comes in here and he has a shit fit every single time we come into the studio.
It's true.

Speaker 1 He just can't get, he doesn't, the only thing that he wants to do in life is be in the studio with Chrissy and Daddy. I know.
It's the things you can't have. That's right.
You want the most.

Speaker 1 So we had to lock the door. So we have a little lock at the top that you slide, right? And my biggest nightmare is that the ceiling fan sets on fire.

Speaker 1 And we can't get out. All the soundproofing goes aflame and we can't get out.
It's like a white snake concert.

Speaker 1 And then it's being broadcast. TCB episode 3312.
The gang dies.

Speaker 1 You guys are fucking... Oh,

Speaker 1 it works. Wow.

Speaker 1 I wanted you guys to die and it worked.

Speaker 1 Back to Frank. You know, but if you're a gentleman in your 40s, you know, don't turn the video off, you know, because...

Speaker 1 I know. Yeah, listen, I know that I'm really, this content is geared toward people in their 70s, but if you're in your 40s, wait, wait, wait, wait, hold on.

Speaker 1 I need your subscription. I'm almost there.

Speaker 1 I'm almost to 1,000.

Speaker 1 You know, when the odometer rolls over to 999, I've been there for 12 miles.

Speaker 1 Don't worry, Frankie. So it's the commercial break.
Exactly. We feel your pain.

Speaker 1 You know, 40 years old, you think you're the men of the world and you know everything that's going on out there. And nothing can be further from the truth.

Speaker 1 When you're 50, that's when you know everything.

Speaker 1 Well, way to really, really. Yeah, real.

Speaker 1 Wait, if you're 40, hold on, I got to advise you. You're an idiot.
You're an idiot.

Speaker 1 Look at my body.

Speaker 1 You're the kind of dumbass no one cares about. Excuse me.
You're the kind of badass that no one cares about.

Speaker 1 There are two kinds of badasses in the world. Me and all you other shitheads.

Speaker 1 So, take this information, absorb it, utilize it, and what is it, a vitamin? Absorb it.

Speaker 1 I'm in the Frankie tank absorbing the information. It feels so good on my Skundal sack.

Speaker 1 Can I dip my balls in? And that advice. It really absorbs better that way.
Yeah, it does.

Speaker 1 That's right.

Speaker 1 It gets your blood faster.

Speaker 1 Your tasty testicles.

Speaker 1 Your taste buds? Your testicle taste buds. Put it into play because it just might make you a little bit more wiser when you're a guy my age.
How old is that,

Speaker 1 you never stayed? Yeah, is that 50? I'm guessing 65,

Speaker 1 probably. And he looks good for 65.
Yeah, no, he does.

Speaker 1 That's why he wants people to look at his mouth. I guess whenever he's drinking like amniotic fluid or something and splashing it on his face every morning.
I use fearful slenta

Speaker 1 on my eyes.

Speaker 1 gentlemen. So, before we get cranking into this video, and anytime you like it, anytime you like the information, anytime you think that this information is going to help you catch your cheating dog

Speaker 1 wife, then smash that like button and don't forget to subscribe. Oh my god, it's okay.
So, Frankie is constantly talking about on other videos that are not as good auditory-wise, or I would play them.

Speaker 1 He is always talking about older men trying to be younger. Like, he's in Mexico and he's talking about the right-length bathing suit, right?

Speaker 1 And he's like, you know, I see these guys wearing them down around their ankles. That's a young guy.
You're not a young guy. You know, don't try and be a young guy.

Speaker 1 And then I see guys that wear them way too short. That's a young guy.
Don't try and be a young guy. It's got to be the right length, right in between.
And I'm like, what are you, a Catholic nun?

Speaker 1 You like checking girls' skirts or something? I don't even mean the right length for a bathing suit. Who fucking cares? Right.
He's always talking about.

Speaker 1 Yeah, the bathing suit length isn't going to be what the turning point is. No,

Speaker 1 yeah, I know.

Speaker 1 Some girl's not going to sleep with you based on your bathing suit length. I can guarantee you.
Right. Because when you get to that age, it's just like

Speaker 1 bathing suit length.

Speaker 1 Hot dog. Ooh, sex at mama.

Speaker 1 But he's always talking about how you shouldn't try and act younger. You should try and act your age, like be your age.
And then what he says is,

Speaker 1 if you smash that like button. What are you, 12 playing Fortnite?

Speaker 1 Smash that like button.

Speaker 1 Smash your face, Frankie.

Speaker 1 Let's get cranking into this video. If you say let's get cranking one more time,

Speaker 1 you are dating yourself by saying let's get cranking. Let's get cranking.
Let's get cranking. You know what? Let's get cranking means.

Speaker 1 It's like when they had to crank the cars, they would actually start them for the front day.

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 1 There's a lot of you guys out there that are saying, you know what? My wife ain't cheating on me. Look at this.
Look what's going on here. Why would she cheat on me?

Speaker 1 I guarantee you're not just watching a Frankie B video

Speaker 1 randomly if your wife is not cheating on you. That's right.
That's right. Frankie.
No, what he's saying is. Look what I've got going on.
Look at what I've got going on. Look at this package.

Speaker 1 Look at the full package.

Speaker 1 That's right. I get up 13 times a night to pee.

Speaker 1 Got gray hairs on my pubes.

Speaker 1 I've been going to the tanning bed for 40 years, so my skin is like leather.

Speaker 1 I've got bulletproof skin.

Speaker 1 Why would she not want me?

Speaker 1 I get half an erection.

Speaker 1 Half an erection is full erection.

Speaker 1 It only goes to five.

Speaker 1 It's like that old speaker that's broken where you just need it to turn up a little bit louder, but it never does. It's like my cock.

Speaker 1 Why would she leave that? That's right. I've got a penis pump to help me get it there.

Speaker 1 I don't know. Do you pay attention? What was that?

Speaker 1 I don't know. I don't know.
Do you have attention to her? Are you affectionate? Are you romantic? Are you giving her what she needs financially?

Speaker 1 Sexually.

Speaker 1 Think about it. I will think about it.

Speaker 1 Financially. Have you paid for last night?

Speaker 1 Your credit's no longer good here, sir.

Speaker 1 You're four fucks behind on paying us.

Speaker 1 Oh, Frankie.

Speaker 1 Financially, what does that mean?

Speaker 1 What is a woman supposed to leave you the second you can't afford everything? Yeah, I guess so. I think we're getting into another specific here.

Speaker 1 Frankie still lives with his mom in a one-bedroom south side of Chicago.

Speaker 1 Are you? Are you?

Speaker 1 Best of you.

Speaker 1 What kind of shape are you in? Are you changing? I'm pretty bad shape. Things are not going great for me right now, Frankie.
It's a really bad situation. I'm in bad shape, man.

Speaker 1 I'm playing Dungeons and Dragons in my dad's basement. Finding your videos? Yeah, I've been watching your videos on repeat for three years.

Speaker 1 Bad shape, Frankie. Taking care of yourself.
Are you making sure you're the best possible you

Speaker 1 you could be for your wife? What generalized bullshit is this? Are you the best possible?

Speaker 1 You sound like one of those life coaches on clubhouse are you the best you did you wake up this morning being the best you you can be what is the best me I can be what the fuck does that mean exactly I mean I get the general premise of it I do come on like you yes like get up be a good human like you know smile let people in and traffic I get all that bullshit but what a bunch of fucking generalized bullshit like tell me exactly what I need to do to be my best yeah we need specifics and what does it mean if you can't work out you're not like you your women shouldn't be with you I don't get it it's just like it's just, Frankie, here you go again.

Speaker 1 Just giving us a bunch of pylon bullshit, you know, a bunch of platitudes that don't mean anything. And I guarantee you're not going to get to a point here.
I guarantee you never get to the point.

Speaker 1 You want her to be that way, right? You want her to look good. You want her to be able to get it.
But she can't go to the gym. Yeah, of course.
But I'm the man.

Speaker 1 But I'm the man. That's the way it's supposed to be.
I was built like this. I can't help it that God made me.

Speaker 1 You're being your best self. Yeah, you're being my best self.
I'm being a man. I can't help it that God wants me to be the king of my territory.

Speaker 1 You're just lucky we're letting you vote.

Speaker 1 Her dress nice. You want her to be sexy.
You think she doesn't want the same to you? Guys, stop being complacent. All right.
That's how you get yourself in trouble. Here's the facts.

Speaker 1 Facts. Oh, here he comes with the facts.
He's breaking out the Google machine.

Speaker 1 I can guarantee no facts are going to follow. 53% of all wives cheat on their men.

Speaker 1 What was was that 33

Speaker 1 okay 33 percent

Speaker 1 geez astrid are you still here

Speaker 1 i'm gonna go check her phone immediately three percent so let's talk about wait he said 53 53 53

Speaker 1 i think that's a little high

Speaker 1 Okay, now you got my attention, Frankie. Okay, now go.
Tell me more.

Speaker 1 If I got you and nine of your buddies together and I interviewed all 10 of you guys and I asked you, do you think your wife is cheating on you? Well, probably

Speaker 1 I would say all ten would say no. But guess what? Five of you guys are wrong.

Speaker 1 Whoa.

Speaker 1 Facts lay in the facts. Where did you get this information from? Does the CDC give this information on their website? Because I don't know.
That just seems like a high number. It does seem like.

Speaker 1 50, like five out of ten women cheat on their husbands? No. Huh.

Speaker 1 I wonder how many men cheat on their wives. Yeah.
That's a good question.

Speaker 1 But he doesn't have those facts readily available. That doesn't fit the narrative of this video.
No. Five of your guys.
So room of 10, at least five of the wives are cheating on your husbands.

Speaker 1 Now, think about that. Here's a figure.
Think about that. 67% of all guys cheat.

Speaker 1 67%. So 7 out of 10.
Wow. Wow.
We are a bunch of fucking cheating

Speaker 1 fuckers. I know, and I'm thinking, like, are the cheaters also cheating on each other?

Speaker 1 Yeah, because then the math doesn't work out. So some of these guys are going to switch a menu,

Speaker 1 which is nothing wrong with that. Absolutely.
But I mean, you shouldn't do it while you're married, but okay.

Speaker 1 But the statistical thing is kind of feeling more like there's the wife is cheating and the man is cheating. Yes, the man is cheating and the wife is cheating.

Speaker 1 In that case, that's a whole other episode. That's just swingers.
That's just, yeah. That's just swingers.
Polyamorous. Which, by the way, we get a ton of traffic on that episode from

Speaker 1 search results on Google. I just want you to know.

Speaker 1 53 of all women cheat 39 of men get caught you want to hear something alarming 48

Speaker 1 of all cheating wives get caught and in this video i'm going to show you how you catch them tip number one wow we've been listening to this video now for 12 minutes and he we're just getting to the part where he's actually and he said he was going to give us facts but i'm not sure that those were facts i just want to let you know that i have no idea that that information didn't cite any kind of stuff

Speaker 1 of course he didn't. He cited his own life.

Speaker 1 93% of my wives have cheated on me.

Speaker 1 If you got five, if you got 10 of my wives lined up in a room, five of them cheated on me. 5.3.

Speaker 1 One cheated twice.

Speaker 1 Oh, 10 of my friends. That's crazy.
That's crazy. Yeah.
Wow.

Speaker 1 I don't feel so great about marriage anymore. Now I'm kind of like, eh.

Speaker 1 I was feeling great about my wife. Now I'm like, eh, she's half of her's cheating on me.
Half of her is

Speaker 1 your wife has become more judgmental towards your marriage or your relationship.

Speaker 1 One thing to note about a cheating.

Speaker 1 Maybe you're just a dick, Frankie.

Speaker 1 Maybe she's more judgmental because you're a cocksucker. Yeah.
And spouse. She's always going to try and rationalize her behavior.

Speaker 1 Always going to try and make out that your marriage is far worse than what it is. You know why? Because it makes makes them feel like cheating wasn't an option.
I had to do it. It was so bad.

Speaker 1 They're getting all.

Speaker 1 Frankie has been in this conversation. Absolutely.
He's repeating what he heard.

Speaker 1 I had to do it, Frankie. You're a dick.

Speaker 1 You're a misogynist. You're a fucked wad.

Speaker 1 You're an overgrown oaf.

Speaker 1 Justification. I know.
Poor Frankie.

Speaker 1 Theatrical and dramatic on the marriage. They're judgmental.
Everything you do is wrong all of a sudden. Because women are irrational and can't

Speaker 1 be crazy. That's right.
They only think with their emotions. They think with their vaginas, not with their heads.

Speaker 1 Women, man.

Speaker 1 They're like, I don't know. They're like

Speaker 1 crazy monkeys just running around your jungle.

Speaker 1 Screaming at things and you're being irrational. I'm cheating on you.
Yeah, we're men. We're like, we're like like dogs.
We sit and we roll over when we're told to. And we cheat.
67%.

Speaker 1 We cheat 40%

Speaker 1 more than women do.

Speaker 1 Because sometimes you just got to find another dick to be with. You know what I'm saying?

Speaker 1 Why? Why all of a sudden? You know why? Because she's trying to rationalize her thoughts. She's wrong.
She's trying to rationalize her thoughts.

Speaker 1 What does that mean? I'm trying to rationalize my thoughts.

Speaker 1 I'm trying to think my thoughts. Okay, Frankie.
Frankie, he's screaming, too. I know.
Oh, he's hot, dude.

Speaker 1 It's emotional. It's visceral.
Oh, God. Poor Frankie.
He just can't help himself.

Speaker 1 You know, women are a strange breed. They can actually train themselves in their mind to fabricate.

Speaker 1 Women are from...

Speaker 1 Strange breed. Women are from a third universe.

Speaker 1 Strange breed. They have lizard people DNA.

Speaker 1 I heard it on Alex Jones. They've trained their brains.
They've trained their brains. They can train their brains to make shit up.

Speaker 1 Where we guys, we know, we got everything clear. We see it clear as day.

Speaker 1 That wasn't a riot. That was some people having a nice day at the Capitol.

Speaker 1 What are they thinking? These women. They're out of control.
They are.

Speaker 1 This marriage that just ain't working, so they can justify their ass cheating. Pay attention to that.

Speaker 1 They're ass cheating. They're ass cheating.
That's what it sounded like. They can justify their ass cheeking.

Speaker 1 You have to justify them. They're just there.
Don't worry about it.

Speaker 1 Frankie, you're on a roll today.

Speaker 1 Frank, my god, he's out today.

Speaker 1 Two. The intimacy has faded.

Speaker 1 Hello.

Speaker 1 Hello. Who's Richard Simmons walking walking in the door? The entity has faded.
Hello.

Speaker 1 Don't call me Shirley.

Speaker 1 Now, this could be for a lot of reasons. You know, women are very moody, so.

Speaker 1 What the fuck, Frankie?

Speaker 1 You are so bad, man. You are so bad.
This is so awful. I know.
Can you imagine like sitting down with Frankie and on a first date? And he's like, well, you're just moody and irrational.

Speaker 1 You're trying to think your thoughts. You're a strange breed.
Yeah, you're a strange breed. You're trying to think your thoughts.

Speaker 1 I don't think them.

Speaker 1 Literally, I don't think anything.

Speaker 1 When I go to sleep at night, not a thing. Crickets.

Speaker 1 You're just a whole bunch of moody bitches.

Speaker 1 You make this rather snappy, won't you?

Speaker 2 Hi, cats and kittens. Rachel here.
Do you ever get the urge to speak endlessly into the void like Brian? Well, I've got just the place for you to do that. 212-433-3TCB.
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Speaker 2 Feel free to call and yell all you want. Tell Brian I need a race.
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Speaker 2 The juicier, the better, by the way. We'd love to hear your voice, because Lord knows we're done listening to ourselves.

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Speaker 1 Telltale sign. You know, if you're sexual telltale sign that your wife is sleeping with somebody else is if she's sleeping with somebody else

Speaker 1 and not you.

Speaker 1 You're going safe, Ranky. Life has just been fading on a regular basis.

Speaker 1 Why is that all of a sudden? It's very easy, gentlemen. Open your eyes.
She's getting laid from someone else. Oh, man.

Speaker 1 Could it be that marriage is a marathon and not a sprint? And there are times when, hey, listen, you got to spice things up in the bed. There could be emotional problems.
There could be depression.

Speaker 1 There could be problems. Money.
There could be kids. Fucking kids.

Speaker 1 Yeah, have a kid.

Speaker 1 You want to really put a kibosh on your sex life?

Speaker 1 Have sex and make a child.

Speaker 1 It's unbelievable. Then try and have sex while a child is sleeping in between the two of you.
My dick isn't that long.

Speaker 1 Honey, put your vagina over here. I'm just going to hop over from Tias for a second.
I mean, come on, Frankie, get it together. There could be a million reasons why your sex life is slowing down.

Speaker 1 It's just, if you've been married for a long time, don't expect that you're going to get late every second of every day. That doesn't happen like that.
No. Take it from a guy who's been married twice.

Speaker 1 I'll leave it there. So she's constantly rejecting you? Open your eyes.
So, Tim. If she's constantly rejecting you, you've got bigger problems than sex, man.

Speaker 1 I mean,

Speaker 1 like, if you're if you're like, hey, baby, you want to have sex? And she's like, that thing?

Speaker 1 Don't bring that thing near me. You're just moody.
Yeah, and you're just moody.

Speaker 1 Ah, you're just moody.

Speaker 1 Don't bring those, roll those testicles back up from the floor.

Speaker 1 Put them back in your fan.

Speaker 1 Best to you.

Speaker 1 Scrundlefish.

Speaker 1 Scrundlefoot.

Speaker 1 I just had the thought of Freaking taking down his pan

Speaker 1 and his testicles roll out like one of those

Speaker 1 cartoon tongues.

Speaker 1 Woo!

Speaker 1 Oh, best to you, Frankie.

Speaker 1 Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 His advice is really all. Frankie, just you're a cartoon character.
I don't know what to say. That's it.
I think that is it. Number three, they're constantly asking you to go take that trip.

Speaker 1 Why don't you go get away? Why don't you go visit

Speaker 1 possibly asking you to take a trip? Take a trip. Why don't you leave the house and take your furniture with you?

Speaker 1 Why don't you take half the stuff and sign this paperwork and take that trip you've been wanting to the other side of town in that apartment where you still live?

Speaker 1 Take that trip? What?

Speaker 1 Take that trip.

Speaker 1 Possibly. Who says that? Hey, honey, I really want you to take that trip.

Speaker 1 Start watching what you're drinking because she's probably poisoning you. Honey, I want you to get in the car and drive away right now.
Test the brakes.

Speaker 1 Oh, my God. What the fuck?

Speaker 1 Emily, how about the golf trip with the buddies? You need to go. Gentlemen, there's a reason why she wants you gone.
So she can spend more time with the person she's cheating with. Oh my god, Frank.

Speaker 1 This is so specific. This had to have happened to him.
Oh, this had to have happened to him.

Speaker 1 He is. Here's the thing.
He went on a golf. He thinks that his ex-wife is watching this, right? And he thinks, because he's that self-important.

Speaker 1 He thinks his, because he doesn't think much of women, obviously, and he thinks that he's that important.

Speaker 1 That his wife is now going to be watching this big YouTube star with all 672 of his subscribers, right? As he describes without describing.

Speaker 1 He's not literally watching and laughing and laughing and going, thank God. Thank God.
I got half the house.

Speaker 1 Thank God I didn't sign that prenup

Speaker 1 because he was the douche I thought he was.

Speaker 1 Well, you know, it's kind of strange how I met him anyway. I was just sitting at the bar and he came up and said, Hey, I'm your blind date.

Speaker 1 And I was like, No, you're not. You're like, I know I'm not.
I'm no, I'm not your first. Look at me in the eyes.
Yeah, look at me in the eyes. Look at my body.

Speaker 1 Look at my body.

Speaker 1 He came in the bar like the Kool-Aid man. He busted through the wall.
He busted through the wall with his shirt off and was like, look at my body.

Speaker 1 Hey, I know I'm not your first choice, but I'm a choice.

Speaker 1 Oh my God.

Speaker 1 So she's constantly push, push, pushing for you to take a trip constantly. What? Push, push, pushing.

Speaker 1 I've never in my life, have I ever, I've had lots of people cheat on me, but I've never had had anybody push, push, push for me to take a trip constantly. Take that trip.
Go. Are you back?

Speaker 1 You leave again.

Speaker 1 I bought you tickets to Mexico.

Speaker 1 They're on the table.

Speaker 1 I don't.

Speaker 1 Don't unpack.

Speaker 1 Don't unpack and don't look in the shower because the pool boy's there.

Speaker 1 Go back. Go back to Mexico.
You know those whorehouses down in Costa Rica?

Speaker 1 Go to those. I want you to go experience that.
You only live once. Get out of here.
See you later.

Speaker 1 I bought a ticket for you and the 19-year-old babysitter to head out to Mexico together. Take the kids.

Speaker 1 They only had one room available. King Bed.

Speaker 1 Take the kids with you. Leave them at the airport.
I don't give a shit.

Speaker 1 Billy, the pool boy's got a dick that's 12 inches long

Speaker 1 and it's curved

Speaker 1 like this.

Speaker 1 Not your flat,

Speaker 1 half-hard cock.

Speaker 1 The fire's not working. Take that trip.
There's a reason why. Oh, I bet there is.

Speaker 1 Do you ever notice that the routine might be changing? Especially if you've been in a long-term marriage. Do you ever notice she's spending more time with your divorce attorney?

Speaker 1 Yes. I mean, that the routine.
Do you ever notice she's moving stuff out of the house on a Saturday morning

Speaker 1 and packing the kids up to go on a nice long vacation with you without you without you

Speaker 1 something could be up changing the routine did you ever know she's changing the routine

Speaker 1 that's right

Speaker 1 she meets your next-door neighbor for sex in the morning

Speaker 1 she could be cheating on you might be

Speaker 1 possibly possibly

Speaker 1 I mean,

Speaker 1 don't let your thoughts run wild. Don't be moody.
Yeah. Listen, I don't say this to get you paranoid.

Speaker 1 I just want you paying attention to all the 300 different things that could mean your wife's cheating on you. Oh, marriage.
Let's face it. You have a routine and your wife has a routine.

Speaker 1 If all of a sudden that routine starts changing, well, there's a reason why. Because she's making.

Speaker 1 I can't imagine that he's been in a relationship before. I mean, obviously it's not successful.
No, yeah. I mean, he would.

Speaker 1 Everything he's saying just doesn't make the sense. Doesn't make I mean, listen, could all of this be construed as something to be concerned about?

Speaker 1 I'm sure the cheaters have displayed some of these things. Sure,

Speaker 1 in history, yes, I'm sure. But it's not an immediate, like, she's cheating.
Wow, this is. You change your routine.
What about living your best self? Yeah.

Speaker 1 What about living your best self and doing your thing?

Speaker 1 And what about not having a routine, you know, that set of a routine that if she doesn't brush her teeth at noon, you know, at four in the morning every day, she's cheating on you. Exactly.

Speaker 1 Sounds like you're just ultra-paranoid, or this this has happened many times to you.

Speaker 1 These are all the different ways you have been cheated on, and you thought back on it and was like, Oh, that must have meant I should have paid attention to that.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I mean, if she changes the routine change, she's pushing me to go on trail.

Speaker 1 If the routine change includes someone else's dick, then yeah, I can understand why.

Speaker 1 But otherwise, maybe she's maybe she's just a human and people need to change routines. Don't ask

Speaker 1 time for the person that she's cheating with. So, you you need to pay special attention.
Don't blow it off.

Speaker 1 Don't blow it off. Get a private investigator.
Put a tracker on her car.

Speaker 1 Like, why did you change your routine? What are you doing? Frankie said it.

Speaker 1 Frankie, I was watching this YouTube. You start with the right upper quadrants usually when you brush your teeth and now you're at the left quadrant.

Speaker 1 Are you fucking our son's teacher?

Speaker 1 She's a woman. I know.

Speaker 1 Is that pubic hair? Is that pubic hair? In your mouth. In your mouth.

Speaker 1 Or dental floss. I can't tell.
Oh, it's dental floss? All right. Then just checking.

Speaker 1 That's funny.

Speaker 1 That's funny.

Speaker 1 She usually gets into the bed around 7.05 and 7.12. You whore!

Speaker 1 You good for nothing slut.

Speaker 1 It's happening all over again. It's happening all over again.

Speaker 1 Oh, shit.

Speaker 1 I bet Frankie's life is actually pretty sad outside these videos. I know.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Seems pretty rigid, too. Yeah, I mean, for, you know, for a guy who seems to get laid a lot or thinks he gets.
It's like, that's, you know, people who are paranoid like this only get laid a lot.

Speaker 1 They don't have relationships that last for a long time because they're so jealous and so paranoid that

Speaker 1 they can't hold a relationship because it doesn't work that way. Fuck yeah,

Speaker 1 not to mention it's exhausting. It is.
It's exhausting. It really is.
Why are we doing this forever? Okay, pay attention if she's doing things different. Her routine varies.
She's going out more.

Speaker 1 She's dressing different. She looks different.
She's coming home a little later. If your wife looks like a different person,

Speaker 1 if your wife is a different person,

Speaker 1 if your wife has hired an actress to come in the door, it's likely something's going on.

Speaker 1 Pay attention.

Speaker 1 Pay attention. I'm exhausted.
I don't want to pay attention anymore. In my marriage, I don't want to pay attention.

Speaker 1 I don't want to pay attention to anything that Astra does that's out of the ordinary. I chalk it up to she's a human being.
Exactly. And I go, I love you.
That's what I do.

Speaker 1 I go, I love you no matter what.

Speaker 1 Whatever.

Speaker 1 She got stuck at the office where she never got stuck before.

Speaker 1 By the way, who gets stuck at the office? You don't have the code to get out the door? You know what I'm saying? I got stuck in the office. I'm stuck in the office.
They won't let me out.

Speaker 1 Maybe she got a promotion. Maybe she got a promotion.
Maybe it's a big project she's been working on. Or maybe she's fucking Bob and accounts payable.

Speaker 1 Could be. I mean, it could be.
Could be. Yeah.
Possibly. Could be.

Speaker 1 Telltale signs. It could happen once in a while.
I get that. But just pay attention to the pattern.
You're going to bust her ass out. Before we get to that.
You're going to bust her ass out.

Speaker 1 What is that?

Speaker 1 You and your friends making up words now?

Speaker 1 You got phrases over there and Frankie V-Land busting her ass out. I'm gonna bust your ass out.

Speaker 1 If you broke like one more time,

Speaker 1 I'm gonna bust your ass. Your ass is busted.
If you brush your teeth from right to left one more time, I'm gonna bust your ass out. I got a tracker on your toothbrush.

Speaker 1 I know which way you're brushing.

Speaker 1 Bust your ass out.

Speaker 1 Jennifer, we have to talk to you.

Speaker 1 Why is Patty from HR in here? We should have to have a conversation with you. Last night when you were working late and Frank busted through the door without his shirt on

Speaker 1 and two ring lights

Speaker 1 saying, look at my body,

Speaker 1 and I just busted your ass out.

Speaker 1 It really disturbs some of the other employees. I'm afraid, I'm afraid things aren't working.

Speaker 1 Oh, this is the third job in six months.

Speaker 1 Oh,

Speaker 1 when When Frankie showed up with a camera and a dolly,

Speaker 1 when a key grip and two soundmen showed up in the office to set up for Frankie busting through the wall, saying,

Speaker 1 I caught you cheating.

Speaker 1 I really am picturing this. I mean,

Speaker 1 like, with a bunch of cameramen around him and a dolly, like one of those dollies that just pushes him to the wall

Speaker 1 So it looks like he's flying to the wall with his shirt off

Speaker 1 Look at my body

Speaker 1 I caught you cheating

Speaker 1 Nope, just doing invoicing

Speaker 1 Well, this is embarrassing

Speaker 1 I'll be at the house if you need me. I'm gonna go back and make some dinner Feel like Thai tonight, honey

Speaker 1 Don't worry, I'll pay for the damage.

Speaker 1 Oh my god, Frankie.

Speaker 1 Oh, Frankie, you're one of a kind, man.

Speaker 1 I'm gonna bust the wall out in your office trying to figure out what's going on.

Speaker 1 It's me, Frankie B.

Speaker 1 Smash that like button

Speaker 1 Smash that like button while I smash to this wall and find my wife cheating

Speaker 1 Nope, it's just inventory. Ah shit

Speaker 1 Hey honey, sorry

Speaker 1 I'm really sorry.

Speaker 1 I apologize. I apologize everybody.
Hi, I'm Frankie B.

Speaker 1 Have you seen my YouTube channel? It's for guys over 50 minutes of fitness fashion fun. I don't know.
Maybe you're not. Photography.
Photography.

Speaker 1 Home improvement projects. Maybe you've seen it.
Here's a card.

Speaker 1 Smash that like button. Smash that like button.
Okay, thanks, everybody. Bye.

Speaker 1 And then the dolly pulls backwards, and all the guys file out of the hole.

Speaker 1 Janine, we're going to have to talk about your husband again. I know.
That's the third wall this month.

Speaker 1 Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 Woo.

Speaker 1 Into tip number five. Let's talk about it.
Thank God it's almost over. I can't laugh at you.
Most guys, when they get into their 50s, up their 50s, they get very complacent.

Speaker 1 They're not really paying attention to what's going on. The obvious signs, because you're so caught up in your own life, your routine.
You often

Speaker 1 all involved in yourself, thinking about yourself all the time.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he makes this sound, it makes it sound like when you're 50, like someone turned off the switch and you're just like,

Speaker 1 I can't think about anything else.

Speaker 1 I used to be like, look at my body, and now I'm like, look at my body.

Speaker 1 I'm so involved in myself.

Speaker 1 We turned 50 and they put you in a wheelchair in the old people's home. It's like you're 50.
It's 50.

Speaker 1 Harrison Ford's making Indiana Jones doing his own stunts. He's 90.

Speaker 1 Come on, Frankie.

Speaker 1 Your wife spouse for granted. And that's probably not a good thing to do.
You know, if you choose... It's probably not a good thing to do to take your wife for granted.

Speaker 1 Your wife's spouse. Yeah, your wife's spouse.
Your wife's spouse. Hey, spouse.

Speaker 1 Hey, spouse. What's up with the cheating? What?

Speaker 1 I just noticed. I noticed that you put your hair in ponytails yesterday.
That's not usual.

Speaker 1 I'm coming to your office again. Okay, fine, but don't bring the movie crew this time.

Speaker 1 But I already paid him for 12 videos. We're up to 900 subscribers.

Speaker 1 To ignore all the telltale signs, if you're good with that, then that's fine. But if you're not, you need to open up your eyes.
You need to start paying attention to what they're doing. All right?

Speaker 1 Especially if they know you're very complacent, very lethargic, very not carry.

Speaker 1 Look at Bob! Bobble kid!

Speaker 1 Look at my husband, that fat Bob on the couch playing NFL Madden.

Speaker 1 Go ahead, whip your dick out right here. He's not going to notice.
He doesn't notice shit. Since he turned 50, he just lays on the couch eating Doritos, mumbling to himself.

Speaker 1 Something about the good old days.

Speaker 1 I remember when I used to get lots of pussy.

Speaker 1 No, no, I don't care.

Speaker 1 Go ahead, fuck the pool boy. I'm just thinking about myself.

Speaker 1 You're gonna walk all over your ass.

Speaker 1 You're like... Wow, what's up? Frankie's charged up in this video.
Super charged up. Super deep.

Speaker 1 It's very close to home. Clearly, this has happened to him.
Walk all over your ass.

Speaker 1 Jeez, Frankie. You're like shooting fish in a barrel.
Okay, you're easy. All right.
Start calling them out.

Speaker 1 Start asking what they're doing. Start calling them out.

Speaker 1 Shooting fish in a barrel. Shooting fish in a barrel.

Speaker 1 What's up, Janine? I know you can smell dick on your breath.

Speaker 1 Bust your ass out.

Speaker 1 Bust your ass out.

Speaker 1 What's up with the bite marks on your dits?

Speaker 1 That's a floral print bra. Oh, okay.
Just keeping.

Speaker 1 Just want to keep you on your toes.

Speaker 1 I'm like a ninja.

Speaker 1 My eyes are open. That's right.
I'm like a private eye ninja.

Speaker 1 When she walks in the house,

Speaker 1 I jump from the top of the balcony and I'm like, what's up with that dick on your breath?

Speaker 1 Let me smell your breath. Is that dick?

Speaker 1 Is that the neighbor's cook?

Speaker 1 You're suspecting things, okay, guys? Just

Speaker 1 open your freaking eyes. All right, guys, we're at the climax, and that is.
Oh, we're at the climax.

Speaker 1 Jesus, the climax is the most important part, not the end,

Speaker 1 Frankie.

Speaker 1 But whatever. Tip number five.
And this is going to be the last tip. But you just gave tip number five.
No, I think that's two tip number five. And then he said something about 12 tips.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 No, I think it's five. but he said he did 12 tips earlier that's the one we covered a couple months ago

Speaker 1 in this video but it's the most obvious tip all right let's talk about these other ones haven't been obvious this one's obvious about your wife's cell phone have you noticed

Speaker 1 oh

Speaker 1 here we go

Speaker 1 frankie with the cell phone unbelievable frankie it's like women can't use technology as they're cheating on you anything different in the way that she's being guarded towards that phone where before her phone was laying out on the counter when you go out to a restaurant or a bar that phone is laying on the bar top or the tabletop not hiding anything didn't care all of a sudden she sticks it in her vagina

Speaker 1 it's like contraband in a jail it's like she's smuggling drugs through mexico

Speaker 1 Oh my god, Frankie. I mean, I really am.
Put your phone on the table.

Speaker 1 I didn't see your phone right now. I didn't didn't see your phone right now.

Speaker 1 I'm sorry. Who are you? I'm sorry.
I'm Frankie B.

Speaker 1 I'm Frankie B. I'm your blind date.

Speaker 1 I don't have a blind date. Oh, you don't.
You do now.

Speaker 1 Is that dick on your breath?

Speaker 1 Sorry, just trying to keep you on your toes. I'm a cheating ninja.

Speaker 1 I know when women are cheating.

Speaker 1 I wish Frank could make a cartoon. Like, Frankie's just like jumping all over the walls, like

Speaker 1 in the bathroom. He's like on the zip holding his hands on the ceiling, and then he just jumps down while you're taking his shit.
And he's like,

Speaker 1 Let me see your vagina, press the trolls.

Speaker 1 Bust in your ass.

Speaker 1 I knew it. You're changing your routine.
You never shit in the morning.

Speaker 1 Who are you fucking?

Speaker 1 You're cleaning your bowels for anal sex. I knew it.

Speaker 1 That'd probably get us kicked off fireside. Just that's an example.
I wanted to throw that out there.

Speaker 1 That that phone is hidden. It's in her purse and it's on silent.

Speaker 1 Isn't that the respectful thing to do? Actually, when you're asking me, I don't get it. I don't get what's going on.
Yeah. Why? Why? You don't want your woman.
You don't want anybody. Your woman.

Speaker 1 I know I sound like Frankie is drumming off on me. You don't want anybody.

Speaker 1 I mean, listen, leaving your phone on the table with the down over to the side is appropriate, right?

Speaker 1 But if you have a purse, if I had a purse, I'd put it there. Because that's

Speaker 1 a dinner, yeah. And with it on silence, Frankie's so afraid of getting cheated that he needs to see what's going on 24-hour.
He's your phone right now.

Speaker 1 This guy, I mean, the therapy bill this guy must have is huge. He does go to therapy, though.
He probably thinks he's fine.

Speaker 1 He's giving self-he's teaching the rest of the world how to be just as paranoid as he is.

Speaker 1 Instead of realizing that maybe he's taking a little bit over the edge, he's making other people feel exactly like he does so they fit his motivation.

Speaker 1 See, told you everyone else feels the same way, too.

Speaker 1 You're just a crazy seventh wife.

Speaker 1 So moody. So moody.

Speaker 1 With all your feelings and emotions and vaginas. Yeah, stop bleeding everywhere.
Okay.

Speaker 1 Go somewhere else.

Speaker 1 Going on. Why is that all the sudden? Does it make sense? I don't even have to tell you another word because you already get it, but we're still going to talk about it.

Speaker 1 I have to say another word, but I literally can't shut up.

Speaker 1 We're still going to talk about it.

Speaker 1 Since I was born, I literally can't shut shut up. It's a problem.

Speaker 1 Thank God you found a YouTube outlet.

Speaker 1 Oh, 1,600 people. She's doing that because she's expecting a text from her significant other.
If she's got a code, if she's got a code on that phone, a lockout code, to her, she never had it before.

Speaker 1 Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 Whoa, they come like that.

Speaker 1 They come like that. That's not her.
That's Apple.

Speaker 1 Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 That's not her cheating. That's T-Mobile.

Speaker 1 She's testing her significant other. That's best on a man.
That's Verizon.

Speaker 1 She's not cheating. She's paying her ATT bill.
I mean, come on. What the fuck?

Speaker 1 Oh, Lord, Frankie.

Speaker 1 Open your eyes. Call her out on that.
Ask her why. All of a sudden, there's a lockout code.
Well, in case

Speaker 1 you want to sit, I want to make sure no one gets my information. No problem.
Give me the lockout code. What about the lockout code?

Speaker 1 First of all, it's not called a lockout code. What are you talking about?

Speaker 1 What, are you working in jail? The lockout code. This is like an 80s movie where they're, you know, they're projecting technology in the future.
What's the three minutes for the lockout code?

Speaker 1 The world's going to blow up unless we have the lockout code. It's one, one, two, two, three.

Speaker 1 I can't even imagine dating this guy. I mean, seriously, I would be like, whoa.
I mean, get your phone out of your purse now and give me the lockout code.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I want your lockout code. We just met.

Speaker 1 I know, but you're cheating on me. I mean, you don't.
But I know, but we're on the first phone call. I know, but I want to write it down just in case.

Speaker 1 I'm the cheating ninja. I'm looking in your window right now.

Speaker 1 I just see Frankie like sticking to the window.

Speaker 1 Frankie with his shirt off. Just says that's like pressed body pressed up against the window.

Speaker 1 Busting your ass.

Speaker 1 I'm getting her lockout code.

Speaker 1 She won't give it to you or she'll give it to you and she'll change it again. So she's

Speaker 1 heavily guarded.

Speaker 1 Super heavily guarded. Fort Knox is super heavily guarded.
The phone lockout.

Speaker 1 He's giving a lot of jail signals. Oh, my God.
I know.

Speaker 1 Guarded, bust her ass out. Super heavily guarded.
He's been to the super. Lockout code.
That's right. Oh, my God, Frankie.
Chill out, dude.

Speaker 1 And she's never on it when she's anywhere around you. Think about that.
It's it's the number one giveaway is a woman with that cell phone. So guys, that that's it, man.
That that's all I got for you.

Speaker 1 Wow, I learned a whole bunch of nothing.

Speaker 1 Maybe you should do the opposite. I feel so impressed.

Speaker 1 Let's see if he says smash that like button one more time.

Speaker 1 That's my favorite thing he says.

Speaker 1 I do got more. But that's for

Speaker 1 proper English.

Speaker 1 This is the King's English, right there.

Speaker 1 I do got more. So smash that like button.

Speaker 1 Secret tips. Secret tips.

Speaker 1 Secret tips.

Speaker 1 This wisdom has been passed down from cheating ninja to cheating ninja.

Speaker 1 I'm the sixth generation of cheating ninja in my family.

Speaker 1 We have caught all of our wives cheating on us.

Speaker 1 The curse of Bernardos.

Speaker 1 The curse of those cheating Bernardos

Speaker 1 has been passed out.

Speaker 1 Ancient Chinese wisdom from Bernardo to Bernardo.

Speaker 1 Gotta catch your wife cheating on you, because you know she is.

Speaker 1 I could imagine if I was married to you, I'd be cheating too. Yeah, Frankie.

Speaker 1 I'd be cheating just to make him try and do all this stuff. I know.
This is just fun at this point. Yeah, let's see if he asks you for my lockout code.
I'd hire my own YouTube crew.

Speaker 1 Let's watch Frankie as he asks for the lockout code. He unravels.

Speaker 1 As he comes unglued.

Speaker 1 A real-time experiment to watch a man literally lose his shit.

Speaker 1 Let's watch him ask for the lockout code for the 43rd time tonight. Can I ask your lockout code? No.
Please? No.

Speaker 1 Can I guess it? No. If I get it the first number right, will you tell me? No.

Speaker 1 I'll take care of you financially no

Speaker 1 i'm just a hooker i'm only here for the night

Speaker 1 you don't need my lockout code

Speaker 1 go on that trip you've been planning

Speaker 1 you know what you should do get out get out you know what you should do leave

Speaker 1 if my favorite is if your wife changes a routine like if the moving truck is up front when you wake up

Speaker 1 No,

Speaker 1 cheating on you. Again, you know, guys, when we get into our age, we get a little bit complacent.
We take our wives for granted. We're not always looking at things.

Speaker 1 I think it's just time to open your eyes. A little homework assignment for you guys.
Oh, homework from Frankie. Let's

Speaker 1 do it. I'll see if it works.

Speaker 1 When she comes home tonight, tomorrow, whatever you see her.

Speaker 1 Tomorrow.

Speaker 1 Or just whenever you see her next. Next time you see her.
When the restraining order is lifted.

Speaker 1 When the judge lets you see her again.

Speaker 1 just do this.

Speaker 1 Assault her again with your verbal abuse.

Speaker 1 Start thinking about the things I talked about. Just look.
Just observe. I'm going to be like this with Asima.

Speaker 1 She's going to be like, what's that look? I'm going to be like, cheating ninja. Ancient Chinese secret.

Speaker 1 Ancient cheating wisdom from the Bernardo family. I'm looking at your lockdown code.

Speaker 1 Got me thinking. It's got me thinking.
Tick on your breath.

Speaker 1 Nerve. And if one of the five fall into place, it's like, okay.

Speaker 1 If two of the five fall into place, it's like,

Speaker 1 okay.

Speaker 1 Right? And if three are there,

Speaker 1 I think you got her.

Speaker 1 Today's video. If you liked it or you thought this information was pretty darn good,

Speaker 1 smash that.

Speaker 1 Oh, my God. Who is he? Logan Paul now?

Speaker 1 Come on, Frankie. You have to hit that subscribe bell.
And guys, I always bell. Subscribe.
Bell. What's that? What? It's a button.
It's not a bell, Frankie.

Speaker 1 Back to the jail record. Yeah, I know.

Speaker 1 I bet Frankie has a bell at his house that he rings every time a new subscriber comes. He's like,

Speaker 1 I got another one.

Speaker 1 And his neighbors are like, we don't care.

Speaker 1 Go fuck yourself, Frankie.

Speaker 1 Stop looking through my window.

Speaker 1 You can't have my wife's lockout code.

Speaker 1 I just want you to remember one thing. Uh-oh, another thing.

Speaker 1 He never ends. He just never ends.
He just keeps on going.

Speaker 1 Guys over 50, we're not dead. We're just getting started.
Oh, you're getting started getting dead.

Speaker 1 What was that creepy laugh?

Speaker 1 I'm Frankie B

Speaker 1 the cheating ninja.

Speaker 1 Just getting started. This is the song I think of whenever I hear Frankie B.

Speaker 1 Ready?

Speaker 1 I bet we could just

Speaker 1 take Frankie for a couple days around his apartment and just fast forward it and play this.

Speaker 1 That's a good way to do it. Oh my God.
Frankie, you are honestly, you are my best friend, buddy. You just, I just get endless amounts of entertainment out of you.
It's great.

Speaker 1 I don't know what else I can say. I don't know what else to do.

Speaker 1 It should also be noted that that is the longest episode in commercial break history. Not the longest day.
That was Saturday. But the longest episode.
Clocking in it almost two hours long.

Speaker 1 So very early on in the show's history, we had two hours of Frankie B material.

Speaker 1 You can never claim I don't know a good thing when I hear one, and you can also never claim that I don't beat a dead horse because I do all the time. Settle down, not a real dead horse.

Speaker 1 I mean, not unless the horse was dead already, then the horse isn't going to feel it, right? I don't know. Anyway, I'm opining, because I'm still a little stir-crazy, from putting out 12 episodes.

Speaker 1 Go listen to them, TCB's Endless Day. They're all in your inbox.
And don't worry, TCB's next stupid stunt is right around the corner.

Speaker 1 Lest you think Brian is out of really bad ideas, I have a ton of bad ideas. And I'll tell you just right before I tell Chrissy.
We'll be back tomorrow with a new episode, but you know what to do.

Speaker 1 Go to tcbpodcast.com. All the audio, all the video, right there at one location.
Also, get your free TCB Endless Day sticker.

Speaker 1 Go to the Contact Us page, hit the drop-down menu that says I want my free sticker, send us your address, and we will send you one. At the commercial break on Instagram, please please follow us.

Speaker 1 TCB Podcast on TikTok and youtube.com slash the commercial break for all of the episodes, including TCB's Endless Day on video. And one last thing, if you're feeling froggy, 212-433-3822.

Speaker 1 That's 212-433-3TCB. Not 1888.
Call TCB because John in Iowa has that phone number. Fuck you, John, and fuck the dead horse you rode in on.
All right, cats and kittens, until tomorrow. I love you.

Speaker 1 Best to you. And until next time, I will say, I do say, and I must say, goodbye.
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