TCB's Endless Day #9

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Speaker 2 On this episode of the Commercial Break.

Speaker 3 Listen, you've made it this far. Why stop now? Let's go the distance together.
We're eight hours in with four more to go. Why don't you call us? 212-433-3822.
212-433-3822.

Speaker 3 We're here recording now, and we might just be streaming on Twitch and YouTube. Think about it this way.
If you call in, Brian has less talking to do. Less Brian, more fun.

Speaker 3 See where I'm heading with this? Let's get it going. The ninth hour of TCB's Endless Day starts now.

Speaker 2 The next episode of the Commercial Break starts now.

Speaker 2 The 30 of the morning!

Speaker 2 Oh, yeah, Cats and Kittens. Welcome back to the Commercial break.
I'm Brian Green. This is my dear friend and the co-host of this show, Chris and Joy Hoseley.

Speaker 2 Best to you, Chris and best to you, Brian. Best to you out there in the podcast universe.

Speaker 2 Episode number seven, just a walk in the park, episode number seven of TCB's Endless Day, sponsored by 5-Hour Energy. 12 episodes no one asked for, but everyone's getting.

Speaker 2 Probably many people unfollowing us now as they got seven notifications that the Commercial Break has dropped an episode, another podcast episode for their delight.

Speaker 2 Tickling your

Speaker 2 fancy. Tingle Buds.
Yeah, there you go, Chrissy. Tickling your fancy.
Saying hello to Sean and Sandra and William and

Speaker 2 other people that I cannot remember. I had this memorized, Chrissy, and then we went one break.

Speaker 2 Todd, Sandra,

Speaker 2 William, I already said that. Julie

Speaker 2 and Tina. Not our Tina, but that was Tina.
But, you know, that begs reminding here. There are a couple people that I think need a special hello and shout out.
Yeah, of course.

Speaker 2 The five years of commercial break. By the way, we're celebrating five years.
You're joining us on Twitch, which there's zero people watching us on Twitch. Jeff and John.
Jeff and John.

Speaker 2 Shout out to Jeff and John. Jeff and John.
Hello, guys. How are you doing on Twitch? We're on Twitch right now.

Speaker 2 It's Jeff Hoadley, my boyfriend. My man friend.
My first boyfriend. I have a new boyfriend.
He's at Starbucks. It's Jeff.

Speaker 2 And he's rich, so fuck you.

Speaker 2 you might be able to get me a a tent at Mempho next to the portaltes

Speaker 2 but he has a

Speaker 2 hummer a hummer

Speaker 2 god

Speaker 2 no he's got one of those I don't know what it who cares who's good a shit a couple people bear camel hair tote or a camel hair camel hair tote a camel hair coat a camel hair coat you have a camel hair coat no your boyfriend he does he's well he smells good yeah he's he's an older gentleman he smells good Shout out to Lance.

Speaker 2 Hi, Lance. This is my boyfriend.

Speaker 2 Here we go. Ready? Special accolades for TCB's five years.
Number one, Astrid. This was all your idea.
She's in the studio with us.

Speaker 2 This was all your idea. Thank you so much for kicking me in the pants, getting me off my ass, and putting me on a microphone.
Many, many tens of listeners later. Hundreds of dollars in debt and

Speaker 2 a thousand wires that go nowhere in this studio.

Speaker 2 We've completely taken over children's rooms.

Speaker 2 Here we are. But I will say one thing, regardless of how many people have listened and chart rankings and money that's come and gone and gone and gone, regardless of all of that, I will say this.

Speaker 2 We have 890 hours of this show. Not many people have 890 hours of anything.
So I will say that I do feel accomplished in that sense. But I guess anybody could fart on a microphone for 890 hours.

Speaker 2 Like it's your job.

Speaker 2 It is our job. Only we don't get paid.
Most people get paid at their job. We don't get paid, but that's okay.
So Astrid, I think, deserves high accolades. Number one.

Speaker 2 Number two, Jeff, who has put up with all the comings and goings of the commercial break. So I think Jeff gets a special mention, an honorable mention to Jeff.

Speaker 2 Tina.

Speaker 2 Let me say the third person is Allison Hare. Allison Hare is another person who kind of kicked this all into gear.
So Allison, you're out there. You're listening.
She got the juices flowing.

Speaker 2 Big thank you to Allison. Always supported the show.
Tina has always supported the show. Marianne has supported the show.

Speaker 2 Roxanne Reagan. Roxanne Reagan has supported the show.
So those people deserve honorable mentions. And there's so many more that I am probably forgetting.
Will the Champ.

Speaker 2 I don't know where Will is, but he was a big listener for a long time.

Speaker 2 And so, and Marianne, I think I said her name, but let me repeat it again. Marianne has also been a big fan and a listener and a helper and a worker and a content

Speaker 2 creator, researcher. She knows every oh, and oh, let me not forget.
Let me not forget. You ready for this?

Speaker 2 I've been waiting all day to pull this out, actually.

Speaker 2 Not I, but I am. Where is where are you?

Speaker 2 Um,

Speaker 2 I'm looking at you, Vu. That's my Gustavo.

Speaker 2 Oh,

Speaker 2 and there's a dance section.

Speaker 2 A remix.

Speaker 2 Love my Gustavo. Love my Gustavo.
Disappointed he's not here. And he knows why.
Disappointed you're not here. But that's okay.
We'll let him go. All right, so here we are, episode number seven.

Speaker 2 We're into season number five. Season number five, I think, was marked by a little bit of a turn toward guests and worst content.

Speaker 2 So we used to be good at like breaking down videos and stuff like that. And then we just decided we're just going to talk for a living.

Speaker 2 So that went like most podcasters, rather than relying on replaying television, old television shows, we said, hey, why don't we talk for a little while? And that's exactly what we did.

Speaker 2 Season five, almost very few actually video breakdowns and a whole lot of guests. I think we did, well, what was it, 52 weeks in the year? We maybe did 56 guests in season number five.

Speaker 2 We started bringing on celebrity guests. We made some friends along the way.
Actually,

Speaker 2 let me refresh that. We met some people who pretended like they were our friends for 45 minutes to an hour and then never heard from them again.

Speaker 2 And then we made some true friends like Des Bishop or Hannah Burner, Reggie Watts, or Tom Papa, who you're going to hear today.

Speaker 2 I can think of many others that we had a great time with. Kyle Kinnane comes to mind.
Margaret Cho comes to mind. But let me not sit here and name drop all day long.

Speaker 2 Let me ask you, Chrissy, what is your favorite moment or episode, your favorite from the commercial break? You can fill in the blanks. Do a little ad libs.
There's a lot.

Speaker 2 I mean, I did, you know, a little, I was kind of brainstorming

Speaker 2 last night. I know, thinking about things.
Jeff was in the mix too, helping me. Oh, Jeff was

Speaker 2 commercial break does Jeff have to listen to? Well, he was asking Chat GPT. Oh, he's asking ChatGPT for the commercial about the commercial break.

Speaker 2 Oh, he was? Uh-huh. And he was giving some funny answers.

Speaker 2 Yeah, since I'm feeding it all of our episodes and it's completely rebelling against me, I guess it's now filling itself with a bunch of commercial break bullshit.

Speaker 2 Well, some of the top ones I think are, I mean, the Waffle House is a classic. Waffle House.
We have your shoot.

Speaker 2 Waffle House was an episode. Let me recall.
Waffle House was an episode where I

Speaker 2 started making fun of the fact that if Waffle House did commercials, you know, like

Speaker 2 they never do commercials, but yet they're one of the most popular restaurants out there, at least in the Southeast they are.

Speaker 2 And if they did a commercial, you know, there's always a tagline to it, like, you know, Wendy's, we do it right, or whatever. You have it your way, Burger King, have it your way.

Speaker 2 That Waffle House could have taglines that went something along the line as, Waffle House, we have your credit card, or Waffle House, we see you throwing up in the bathroom.

Speaker 2 Waffle House, House, your dress is on backwards.

Speaker 2 Waffle House, you can't smoke it here.

Speaker 2 Waffle House, please don't play Lincoln Park again.

Speaker 2 Waffle House, we'll see you in the morning. Yeah, Waffle House, we'll see you in the morning.
Oh, Waffle House, it's morning. It's morning time.

Speaker 2 Time to wake up. Waffle House.
Yes, that police officer's waiting for you.

Speaker 2 Waffle House, still not sober.

Speaker 2 Waffle House, do you really care that the silverware is dirty?

Speaker 2 Waffle House. We got your order wrong, but we don't care.

Speaker 2 Yeah, there were a bunch of those. There could be a bunch of ones.
Waffle House is one of the best restaurant establishments in the world. If you don't live in a place where there's a Waffle House,

Speaker 2 fuck, man, I don't know what to tell you. Sorry.
It's just one of those things you have to experience.

Speaker 2 You have to experience a long night followed by a long hour or two at Waffle House, annoying the waitresses and waiters, listening to the short order cooks scream at people, and hopefully getting someone that knows what the fuck to play on that jude box.

Speaker 2 Oh, that's key. That's key because there's always some dipshit out there who decides he wants to play, you know, way down yonder in the cheddar hooch.

Speaker 2 You never knew how much they've ever meant to me six times in a row because he can't. So,

Speaker 2 Waffle House, what's another one? Well, COVID Christmas. COVID Christmas cats.

Speaker 2 You got corn cops fries.

Speaker 2 Brian, in the beginning of the pandemic in 2020, I took my children,

Speaker 2 the three or four I had at the time, I took my young children for their first trip to go, his first, second, and third trip to go see Santa Claus.

Speaker 2 The local Santa Claus at the big mall, they pay a lot of money to because he really does look like Santa Claus. And

Speaker 2 giving no regard whatsoever

Speaker 2 to the pandemic that was going on. Even though here at the house, we locked ourselves, you know, in a bunker, basically, and we were literally hosing down our groceries like everybody else was.
Yes.

Speaker 2 But Brian, but we had to get that Christmas picture. We couldn't let one Christmas go by without Santa Claus.
And so we went and we went, come on down to COVID Christmas Castle.

Speaker 2 The regular Santa Claus couldn't be here because he's got COVID. So we've got Tim.

Speaker 2 He's got, he's, he was in the Vietnam War. He's got a

Speaker 2 corn cob pipe for a nose and two tin pans for knees.

Speaker 2 His teeth are made out of chiclets. Real chiclets.

Speaker 2 Look out for that leaky eye. Come on down to COVID Christmas Castle.
We'll put him on our knees. I love COVID Christmas Castle.
It's a corner. It's one of our favorites.

Speaker 2 Any additional? Carl. When Carl made his debut.
Oh, Carl. I don't think you could recreate that first magic from Carl.
No. Carl Lentz,

Speaker 2 the preacher who went around running around with Justin Bieber for a while.

Speaker 2 And we reviewed one of his sermons where he was talking about soaking or something. I'm not sure what he was talking about.
He was talking about some bullshit having to do with relationships.

Speaker 2 And meanwhile.

Speaker 2 Carl was having sex with babysitters in the park and literally dropping stacks of cash off at their house so that they wouldn't talk.

Speaker 2 He was sending unrequited dick pics and then begging people not to send them out to the world. Well, Carl got caught.
He's got a brand new podcast all about it.

Speaker 2 And I had a voice for Carl because he kind of talked like, you know, one of those. Yeah.
You know,

Speaker 2 he's too old to be talking like this, but he talks like this. You know, the guy.
You know the guy.

Speaker 2 Hey, girl. Hey, girl, what you doing? Hey, it's just me, Carl.
I'm just, hey, just texting, looking for some tidpics.

Speaker 2 I got to go to church in a few hours. I got to walk with the Lord in like four or five hours.
So just do me a favor. I can't preach on a full dick.
Can I come over? Can I stop by, girl?

Speaker 2 That's Carl. I love Carl.
Yep. that's Carl.
Okay,

Speaker 2 give me a not-so-favorite moment from the commercial break. Well, I mean, that's hard.
I don't really, it's kind of like calling your baby ugly.

Speaker 2 For me, I think it's hard. I think one I do remember that I'm glad that we didn't air is the one that you know, which one.

Speaker 2 That's the one where we were reviewing the video with the people that acted like babies. Oh, yeah.
I don't even know that. I don't even know that we want to talk about that.

Speaker 2 Twitch might have rules against us talking about this.

Speaker 2 We did for for a while. One of the things that we didn't review, because I got into it and then we kind of got out of it, was My Strange Addiction, which, you know, I think it's pretty fatty to

Speaker 2 fat, not fatty, but fatty to review those videos online and talk about them. And there's a lot of crazy strange addictions.
We've done, I drink my urine, I eat my car. I love my car.

Speaker 2 I'm in love with my car. I have sex with my car.
Yes. And he has three of them, by the way.
That guy has fallen in love with three cars.

Speaker 2 And every time he falls in love with a new car, they send TLC out there to do another episode.

Speaker 2 Everybody knows the guy's a car fucker. And I mean, hey, listen, God bless you.
There was the girl who loved Nock 3000, the roller coaster.

Speaker 2 And she was underneath the roller coaster. It was in Germany.
It was in Germany. And during the winter, they closed the theme park and they grease it up or do whatever.
So this lady was underneath.

Speaker 2 wiping the grease all over her face and her boobs.

Speaker 2 And then she had a friend with her who was also an Objectophile, which is what they call these people, the folks who fall in love with inanimate objects.

Speaker 2 She had a friend with her that came as like an emotional support friend. That friend had married the Eiffel Tower.
And the fence. Now, listen to this.
Hold on. Now,

Speaker 2 because this is, yes, but while that girl was having sex with Nock 3000, the roller coaster, whatever it was, this ride that span around, you know, one of those carnival rides that spins around.

Speaker 2 All of a sudden, the cameraman notices, turns the camera, and the girl who had married the Eiffel Tower was literally mounting the fence, humping it. She was humping it, licking it, kissing it.

Speaker 2 And all of a sudden, she broke up with the Eiffel Tower.

Speaker 2 Love is fleeting. It is.

Speaker 2 Hey, listen, love, she is a fickle bitch.

Speaker 2 But those My Strange Addiction episodes, there was one in particular that I had found funny when I was reviewing it, but I didn't. But when we started to get into it, we had to like bail on it.

Speaker 2 I think we did the episode, but I don't think we ever aired it. I didn't air it.
And it was a guy who liked to dress up like a baby.

Speaker 2 But when you got a little further into the episode, what I initially thought was funny was clearly taking on a different, strange connotation. Like, and I just thought to myself, this is not cool.

Speaker 2 This is just weird. I can think of many episodes that there are many episodes that we have not aired.
There's probably 30 or 40 episodes that we have never aired. Most of them bad.

Speaker 2 And you know, if I decided not to air it because it was bad, it was really bad. That's true.

Speaker 2 Because of the 700 and now 76 episodes that we have put out, 767, whatever it is, 765 and a half of them are mediocre at best.

Speaker 2 That's our sweet spot. That's our sweet spot.
We fill a niche in the comedy world where it's not really funny, but we laugh at it. You know those background TV shows that we like to watch.

Speaker 2 We don't really have to pay attention.

Speaker 2 That's us.

Speaker 2 You know how you used to go to your grandpa's house or your uncle's house, and they used to have a black and white TV in the kitchen, and you couldn't hear it, and you couldn't see it because it was just an old portable TV.

Speaker 2 We're like whatever was on that portable TV. No one's really listening or watching, but it's on anyway.
It's there. There it is.

Speaker 2 So we had so many of these episodes that we

Speaker 2 haven't aired.

Speaker 2 But there is one in particular that I can think of.

Speaker 2 I'm not going to

Speaker 2 just roll with me here. I promise I'm going to save you.

Speaker 2 Chrissy went through a period of time. It was a hard time for Chrissy.
And she's talked about it here on the show. And she returned after a number of months of in and out of the studio.

Speaker 2 It was just a sudden death. Yes.

Speaker 2 A sudden passing, one in particular. Yeah.
Sudden, like overnight kind of thing. And

Speaker 2 we kind of patched it together. I had Tina come in, Christina helped.
Aster did a few episodes. Gustavo even came in and jumped in from here to there.

Speaker 2 But when Chrissy came back, obviously you just don't recover from something like that overnight. There was a couple of rough days there.
And we had a long night, a long day at the studio one time.

Speaker 2 And Chrissy brought in some boozy seltzers or whatever they are.

Speaker 2 Chrissy, this episode is fucking hilarious, but I will never air it because it's hilarious because as the episode goes on, you get less and less coherent.

Speaker 2 And I'm like, I'm just trying to hold it together. Like the episode, I'm trying to keep the train on the tracks long enough so we can say goodbye.

Speaker 2 But then there's one episode that we recently recorded, as far as bad is concerned, where the guest of ours oh i know that one actually two of them two of them in like a week where the guest of ours talked like brian would for one hour but the discussion was

Speaker 2 so

Speaker 2 how do we say this how do how do i say this without like calling it out

Speaker 2 the discussion was so

Speaker 2 terrible like self-aware terrible that nothing about it ended up being funny and halfway through the episode, the person's parents came in the room to check on them to make sure that they were still okay, like alive, okay.

Speaker 2 And I was like, oh my God, we got bail from this, Chrissy. We got to get out of here.
The second episode that I can think of, we don't talk politics on the show.

Speaker 2 Very rarely do we talk politics on the show. And we got someone who we loved.
We absolutely loved the interview.

Speaker 2 And we tried to explain to them that we didn't talk politics on the show, persisted to talk nothing but politics for the next 45 minutes. That's right.
Yes, that was terrible.

Speaker 2 My favorite episode, my favorite episodes of all time, Shama Lama Ding Dong, because this is the first time I had really been introduced to Kenneth Copeland and kind of his brand of craziness.

Speaker 2 And the preachers, the preachers, and the hype man behind Kenneth Copeland speaking in tongue, screaming and yelling and shouting and sweating, and all while they're trying to raise money. Honestly,

Speaker 2 it's all disconcerting, but it was so fucking funny. And our very second Frankie B episode.
Those are my two favorite episodes. It's Frankie B, yeah.

Speaker 2 Because in Frankie B, we will review it in our last episode of The Endless Day. Chrissy and I have, I've got some brand new Frankie B material.
Brand new. He started putting out more videos.

Speaker 2 He broke up with his girlfriend. No, he didn't.
I think his girlfriend's in the video. Oh, okay.
Frankie looks older, more red, more leathered, less hair. Didn't he get those hair pugs? Yeah.

Speaker 2 I don't think they took.

Speaker 2 Frankie's follicles. We'll see.
Frankie's follicles.

Speaker 2 But But that episode where Frankie talks

Speaker 2 about

Speaker 2 how if a girl has a phone, he's talking about going on first dates, second dates, third dates, whatever it is. He's trying to give love advice to guys over the age of 50, 60.

Speaker 2 Chat GPT actually,

Speaker 2 they kind of called this. You ready for the brand?

Speaker 2 Kind of content Frankie B puts together? What's that? Cigar bar content. Oh.
Masculine cigar bar content.

Speaker 2 I think that's a good word for it.

Speaker 2 So Frankie is explaining to the guys all the reasons why, all the things to look for when your girl is cheating on you. And one of the things you to look for is: does she have a phone at dinner time?

Speaker 2 Does she actually look at her phone at dinner time? Because if she looks at her phone at dinner time, she's not paying attention to you, and there's someone else out there

Speaker 2 that has to be

Speaker 2 taking her time, I suppose.

Speaker 2 Look at my body.

Speaker 2 What was one of the other signs Frankie said?

Speaker 2 If they're working late. If they're working late, that's right.
If they change their hair color,

Speaker 2 change

Speaker 2 men spruce themselves up.

Speaker 2 Even though he's telling people to men to spruce themselves up. But I do think that anybody who likes studies that cheating psychology will tell you that that's definitely a sign to look for.

Speaker 2 If your girl or your guy, your boyfriend, your girlfriend, your girl, girlfriend, both your girlfriend, your polyamorous girlfriend,

Speaker 2 if they all of the sudden decide that they are going to change the way that they look, like just change it overnight, they're going to go to the gym all of a sudden. They got a brand new wardrobe.

Speaker 2 They're changing their hair. They want to go get Botox or whatever it is.
That is a sign that you're cheating. Now,

Speaker 2 always. God.
I have to ask you: when I start eating cream and cereal three times a night and I gain 30 pounds in a month, do you fear that I'm cheating on you?

Speaker 2 Astrid Jake.

Speaker 2 Oh, and I use the phone at dinner. She does.

Speaker 2 Oh, see?

Speaker 2 Maybe Frankie's onto something here. I know for different people.

Speaker 2 We're going to have to find out in the next episode. Okay, let's do this.
Let's take a short break. We got a tight timeline.
We got to turn it around.

Speaker 2 And as soon as I get my shit together, we'll do that. All right, Chrissy and I will be back in just a few minutes.

Speaker 3 All right, all right, all right, cats and kittens. You're in the middle of another episode during TCB's endless day.

Speaker 3 Make sure you're following us at the Commercial Break on Instagram for more information on all of today's events and maybe even a live streaming recording. Wouldn't that be a miracle?

Speaker 3 You know, now would be a really good time to call in and give Brian and Chrissy some moral support. They've been at this for like what, six million hours? 212-433-3TCB.
That's 212-433-3822.

Speaker 3 Be sure to catch catch all these episodes a second time on video at youtube.com/slash the commercial break.

Speaker 3 And get your free exclusive endless day sticker by visiting tcbpodcast.com and dropping us a line on the contact us button.

Speaker 3 Okay, I'm going to go or I'll run the risk of being the second person on this podcast to talk way too much.

Speaker 2 Looking right at you, Brian.

Speaker 3 Best to you.

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Speaker 2 I guess we're not getting the invite back to Mempho.

Speaker 2 Jeff's in the live chat. We're on Twitch right now, just in case you're wondering.
Our first and last Twitch event here on the commercial break.

Speaker 2 Jeff's on the Twitch, and I started saying that I got tents next to the Port-a-Potties at Mempho, and he said, no tent for you. No more tents for me.

Speaker 2 I got to be honest, that'll be okay because I would much rather go to Mempho. and watch Mempho than watch Mempho and try and record people.

Speaker 2 Yes.

Speaker 2 Oh, my God. What a, I mean, we gave away, was that our fifth season? Or was that our fourth season? Dude, that was like second or third.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 So, Jeff, those of you who don't know, and you do know this if you're listening to the commercial break, Jeff puts on Mempho and a number of other events in Memphis every year.

Speaker 2 And this is like, it's a great music festival. It's three days now.
Yes. It's three days long.
And the year that we were there, it was widespread. And Andy Frasco was there too.

Speaker 2 And a couple of other people, a couple of other bands that you would. I think the Avet brothers were there too, the year that I was there.
So the widespread panic in the Avet brothers.

Speaker 2 Well, we got, we decided, okay, hey, what if we put a tent there? What if we like get one of those booths and then we could get people to get excited about the commercial break?

Speaker 2 But mainly we'll record an episode or two live from Mempho.

Speaker 2 Great idea. Great idea.

Speaker 2 Not thinking for one fucking clear-headed second, Brian, that at a music festival there will be live music, leaving zero time for you to be like, I get bothered when blue barks in the background, but I thought going to a live music festival was a genius idea, a great place to record a podcast from.

Speaker 2 Well, we bailed on that idea as soon as we got there.

Speaker 2 I'm like, okay, we're not going to be able to do that, but I have all this equipment that I bought to do like, you know, man on the street type interviews.

Speaker 2 And let's spend $1,000 on stickers, bumper stickers.

Speaker 2 We still have them to give away so that people, with a little QR code on the back, and people will be able to subscribe to the podcast right from that QR code.

Speaker 2 I bet Jeff's had to pay the trash people an extra $500 just to clean up all of the TCV stickers on the ground. I mean, we gave away so many of those stickers.

Speaker 2 And when I was leaving last night, I just saw them all over the ground and I was like, well, okay, I guess that didn't go so well.

Speaker 2 And I did these man on the street interviews. And when I went back and listened listened to them, I thought, wow, this is great audio.
If I was a taper for widespread panic,

Speaker 2 probably better audio.

Speaker 2 What's that? I said it's probably, they probably have better audio than what we got.

Speaker 2 Yeah. No, I mean, I got more widespread panic than I got actual interview.
People talking. Yes, I got widespread panic and no interview.
We had some interesting people.

Speaker 2 We did have some interesting people.

Speaker 2 And one guy. I wasn't there because I ran off from the tent early on

Speaker 2 i have to be honest with you i was not so jazzed about that

Speaker 2 but i just said that i did to let it go it was your weekend and you know you and jeff's weekend and i decided to let it go but chrissy was like i'll be there we're gonna do this we got this i checked in where's chrissy

Speaker 2 Chrissy would like swing by with four beards in her hand.

Speaker 2 This is my friend Bob. And I'd be like, oh, hey, Bob, nice to meet you.
And then Bob and I would talk for five minutes. Where's Chrissy?

Speaker 2 Nope, not there. Or people would come by and they'd be like, Chrissy told me to come by and say hello.
And I'd be like, Great, where is she?

Speaker 2 Don't know. She wanted me to tell you that she'll be here in about an hour to record.
Okay. And the hour later, somebody would come by and they'd be like, Chrissy wanted me to tell you hello.

Speaker 2 And I was like, oh, thanks. Talk to you later.
Bye-bye.

Speaker 2 Good times. But

Speaker 2 that was ill planning from the beginning.

Speaker 2 But

Speaker 2 I had fun at Mempho. Mempho was good.
I'll never forget standing out front of Mempho

Speaker 2 right before the gates open. And there was like people were lining up.
People were getting dropped off and they were lining up.

Speaker 2 And Astrid and I were sitting out there with Tina and Mike on like a cooler or a box that we had brought full of stuff. And we were sitting out there.

Speaker 2 And the security was like, we were like, well, you know, we're trying to get in and we're supposed to have these passes and we're supposed to be inside, and we're supposed to do this, and we're supposed to do that.

Speaker 2 And we sat out there for like 45 minutes as I think the security grew increasingly worried about what was in our box,

Speaker 2 about the security dog, like bringing it around and sniffing the box.

Speaker 2 And I was like, ah, yeah, no, just the commercial break. You've never heard of us?

Speaker 2 Don't you know who we are? We're numbered 312 on the trending charts,

Speaker 2 right above the God Pod and below Jeff Dwaskin.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 Season five was also,

Speaker 2 you know, if we're just being honest about it, it was a tough year for us, right?

Speaker 2 And tough year in the sense that we had, I think we reached kind of new heights financially and numbers wise.

Speaker 2 And then we reached new lows financially and numbers wise. So Kirstie and I were talking about this earlier, earlier in the day.

Speaker 2 I was about to say earlier in the show, earlier in the one long running show. Endless day.
One long endless day. And that is that the commercial break in season five, I think, did one thing

Speaker 2 that I don't think any of us really expected to happen. And that was it became like a serious business

Speaker 2 in season four/slash season five. It became a serious business, get signed to a network, you know, have a certain amount.
Taxes, taxes, capital rolling in the door, employees, HR, and all that.

Speaker 2 And so that took on, it took on kind of a new tone and texture to it.

Speaker 2 And I think season five, if I'm being 100% honest, I think we kind of lose at times, me myself, I kind of lose some of the excitement for the content because I'm stressed out about the actual business part of it.

Speaker 2 But then in season number six, I feel like I got excited again about creating the content

Speaker 2 with you specifically because, you know, you have been here through most of it.

Speaker 2 And I have, I don't think i could i can't think of anyone else i would have rather done this with i agree there are a lot of people that i have considered to put in that chair blue

Speaker 2 two of three of my children uh frankie b i thought about asking to do a show with once uh but you i would lose the magic too with him if blue was in here we'd certainly lose the magic element frankie oh yeah yeah frankie b oh no frankie b is an interesting character in this sense We'll talk about this.

Speaker 2 I have like a soft spot in my heart for Frankie. Of course, he's a Chicago guy.
He acts, talks, and thinks like relatives of mine.

Speaker 2 I'm Irish, but and he's Italian, but I have some Italian relatives, like married into the family kind of Italian relatives. And he reminds me of some of those relatives in a way.

Speaker 2 Very much Eismo, very um

Speaker 2 tan, yeah, very dick-forward.

Speaker 2 Dick forward, he's very dick-forward.

Speaker 2 He's very tan. He's very leathery.
He speaks a certain language. He doesn't speak it all that well, but he speaks a certain language.
I think he caps himself at a certain education level.

Speaker 2 You know what I'm saying? But there's, I have a soft spot in my heart for that because it's a personality that I grew up around.

Speaker 2 But I've always wondered if we bring Frankie B on the show, like if I reach out to him formally and I say, Frankie,

Speaker 2 if you don't know already, we have been mercilessly making fun of you for five or six years. Would you please come on the show and enjoy some laughter with us? Do you have, are you able to do that?

Speaker 2 Do you have some self-awareness, some good humor? Part of me believes that he would. Part of me believes that he'd do anything just to get a few more views.

Speaker 2 And then part of me believes that that would be the end of the game. Like Frankie would be like, cease and desist.
I don't want you using any more of my videos.

Speaker 2 I don't want you making fun of my content. I don't want you to do anything.
And so that that has always been the rub.

Speaker 2 I get this question probably more often than I've gotten any singular question is, when are you going to have Frankie B on? When is Frankie B coming on the commercial break?

Speaker 2 And the answer is, if I have it my way and he continues to put out videos, maybe never, because I think kind of ignorance is bliss in this sense that I know Frankie must know about us.

Speaker 2 I know he must know about us. But I get, but there's a little part of me that thinks it's not a big deal in his head.

Speaker 2 If he does know about us, he doesn't understand how deep the well goes with a commercial break. And that if he did, he may revolt against it.

Speaker 2 He may think that that's not a good thing in his mind and he may revolt against it. But listen, there are, what is the one thing,

Speaker 2 let me ask you this. One person you could have on the commercial break, one person you could invite to be on the commercial break.
And it doesn't, there's no pop quiz. I'm not holding you to this.

Speaker 2 I'm just asking one person that could come on the commercial break and sit and have some time with us. Oh, God.
I don't know. I really don't know.
Great answer. Great answer.

Speaker 2 One person. Just like pick a name out of a hat.
It doesn't have to be, you don't have to go through like a whole, you know, if I could, if I would, if I should.

Speaker 2 Just like one person you can think of right now that you would love to have on the commercial break.

Speaker 2 Oprah.

Speaker 2 Okay. All right.
That's an interesting one. Aim high.
Shoot. Yeah.
Aim super high.

Speaker 2 Aim so high, it'll never ever happen. If I could think of one person that would never come on the commercial break, it would be Oprah.

Speaker 2 Well, it's got to dream big. Yes.

Speaker 2 If I could have one person on the commercial break, David Letterman. I think David Letterman.

Speaker 2 Very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, I think there is, I think it's so much more likely that Dave Letterman would come on the commercial break than Oprah.

Speaker 2 But did you know, we're speaking of David Letterman, here's why I think there might be a chance.

Speaker 2 There was a guy in Iowa who did a local television late night show, like locally on the UHF 16, but he did it for like 15 years.

Speaker 2 And it was called like Bob from Iowa or something, some show, late night show.

Speaker 2 Kind of funny, kind of improvish, kind of Midwestern, you know, certainly taped together, like, you know, bits and pieces all together, but he had a live audience.

Speaker 2 Maybe there was like 200, 300 people in every one of his audiences. He announces he's going to do his last show.
Can't do it anymore. Not going to happen.
Sorry.

Speaker 2 Either they canceled him or I don't want to do it anymore.

Speaker 2 And he gets the same question from one of his guests. If you could have anybody on the show as your last guest, who would it be? And he says, Dave Letterman, because I always admired Dave Letterman.

Speaker 2 I love Dave Letterman. He's kind of the guy that I look to when I think about this show, Dave Letterman.
And Dave Letterman got wind of it. And Dave Letterman showed up.
And

Speaker 2 Dave.

Speaker 2 I mean, so let this be the plea through Twitch. Dave, Dave,

Speaker 2 in one hour, we're going to record the commercial breaks last episode.

Speaker 2 If you could call in, you could please do that. We certainly would appreciate it.

Speaker 2 And I just want to say everybody that's in the Twitch feed right now, I just saw that Sid popped up and said hello. Hey, Sid, Jeff, John.

Speaker 2 Hey, Sid, Jeff, John, my mother-in-law, who commented, only six people in the room right now. That's very sad in Spanish, though.
And now I can hear my father.

Speaker 2 And now I can hear my father-in-law right now. You know what he's saying? Yes, I do.
Do you know what my father-in-law is saying?

Speaker 2 My father-in-law is saying the following.

Speaker 2 Can you take care of my daughter?

Speaker 2 I

Speaker 2 Brian, can you fix the leaking water?

Speaker 2 I,

Speaker 2 Brian, can you pay for your own meal? Can you pay for your own meal?

Speaker 2 Can you fix the broken wheel?

Speaker 2 Aye, Brian.

Speaker 2 Well, Daniel, once again, with this stupid stunt, 12 episodes of the commercial break, I prove that I was, in fact, not the right one for your daughter. So there you go.

Speaker 2 What are you going to think about that?

Speaker 2 But you know what? We're married now. What are you going to do?

Speaker 2 Okay, so

Speaker 2 here's how it's going to go.

Speaker 2 Next, you're going to hear Tom Papa.

Speaker 2 And, right? Tom Papa or Tig Nataro? Tom Papa. Tom Papa.
Yeah, Tom Papa. Next, you're going to hear Tom Papa.
And then you are going to hear Tig Nataro.

Speaker 2 And both of those you have to catch because Tom Papa is great. Tig Nataro was beautiful on the show.
I really, one of my favorite guests. Tom Papa.
It's the second time he's been here.

Speaker 2 We really appreciated him coming. He was great.
But Tig Nataro was fantastic. Reggie Watts was fantastic talking about Aaron.

Speaker 2 Right there. Michael Ian Black was a must-listen to episode.
And this might be the not must-listen to episode of

Speaker 2 the bunch. You loved Reggie Watts? I loved Reggie Watts too.
He was awesome. Yeah, people on Twitch are saying they love Reggie Watts.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 What's that? Is that Jeff? Oh, yeah. Hey, we don't know.
Astrid just yelling things at me. Jeff, John, Bob, no.
Yes.

Speaker 2 Tig, Reggie.

Speaker 2 Astrid, you're fine.

Speaker 2 Yeah, you're doing a great job, Astrid. You're doing a great job.
Unfortunately, the producer job is already filled by the emptiness of that chair every time.

Speaker 2 We tried that before. It didn't work.

Speaker 2 So take a listen to Tom Papa. Take a listen to Tig Nataro.
Chrissy and I are going to come back for one pentult episode where we are going to do our favorite of all time.

Speaker 2 I think we can all agree, our favorite foil of all time, Frankie B. Then after TIG, we'll be back to wrap it up very shortly.
Maybe we'll go live for a few more minutes.

Speaker 2 So at TCB podcast on Twitch, download it. Can make my make my mother-in-law proud of me about something, please.
Ever since I ever since I left my real job, she's been super upset.

Speaker 2 But I am.

Speaker 2 Okay, thank you to Five Hour Energy bringing you this entire day with limited commercial interruption and limited listeners, apparently also.

Speaker 2 We have it on the table like you can see it.

Speaker 2 Oh,

Speaker 2 great live episode. Thank you very much.
Maybe we'll do it again in a half an hour. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Okay, stay tuned at the commercial break on.

Speaker 2 The at the commercial break on Instagram. If we go live again, we will let you know.
We might do that just to wrap everything up and say goodbye. And you can say hello.

Speaker 2 5 Hour Energy, limited commercial commercial interruption they sponsored the entire day thank you very much christy and i want to let you know 988

Speaker 2 988 you can dial it you can talk on the phone you can text it if you're in mental health crises

Speaker 2 you can go ahead and reach out to professionals who know what to do regardless of your financial resources Don't do it alone. Everybody has a bad day, week, month, year, decade.
Just ask me.

Speaker 2 Ask my wife. We've been together for a decade.
Sometimes you go through a really bad decade. Astrid's been through a really bad decade.

Speaker 2 988, babe. Hey, in Spanish or in English.
So your mother tongue, you can go ahead and call them up and say, how do I get away?

Speaker 2 But in all seriousness, Mental Health Awareness Month is the last day of the month, 988. And if you don't need it now, keep it in your back pocket.
You might need it sometime in the future.

Speaker 2 Everyone goes through it.

Speaker 2 YouTube.com the commercial break for all of the episodes on video.

Speaker 2 All of the guest episodes are airing the same time they're on the audio feed. So, you want to watch the guests, you can do that on youtube.com/slash the commercial break.

Speaker 2 And then the regular episodes we will roll out as the week goes on. We need a little time to edit those.
I'm already crazy as it is trying to get it all together. 212-433-3TCB.
212-433-3822.

Speaker 2 Quest, text us, questions, comments, concerns, content, ideas. We would love to talk to you.
And tcbpodcast.com. Get your free sticker.
Go to the contact us button, drop-down menu.

Speaker 2 I want my free sticker. Give us your address, and away it will go.
Okay, Chrissy, that's all I can do for this hour. I think so.
Thanks to everybody out there on Twitch. We love you.
I love you.

Speaker 2 I love you. Best to you.
Best to you. And best to you out there in the podcast universe and Twitch.
Until next hour, Chrissy and I will say, we do say, and we must say.

Speaker 2 Goodbye.

Speaker 3 Ah, the sounds of an Etsy holiday.

Speaker 3 Now that's special.

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