Now I'm a Belieber! (The Return Of Carl Lentz)

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This is WSHIT's head sports reporter, Jim Touchdown Jeffries. Welcome to the game of the week.
That's right, I'm the same touchdown Jim that scored the final six points in the state class D championship game back in 1976. You may remember the game as fondly as I did.
Touchdown Jim, that's me, ran 72 yards in the wrong direction, confused by the bright lights, only to be carried back by my quarterback to the opposing end zone where the final touchdown was scored. And while I had not even made the team that year, we were six players short that day because the opposing team failed to show up and the coach made the call.
And that, my good friends, is how history is made. That's how history is made.
We have a hell of a game for you tonight. The Crabapple Nutbags, our

boys, are facing their toughest

competitors in the Sheboygan

Sheep Wranglers. This, my

friends, is as exciting as a

6-7 year old t-ball match

is ever going to get, so let's

go down to the field where Coach Derek

Ponderosa is fresh off probation

and ready to give his pre-game

talk.

Our goals are...

Listen, listen. Our goals

Thank you. Ponderosa is fresh off probation and ready to give his pre-game talk.
Our goals are, listen, listen, our goals are to hit dingers. Everybody better have their eyes on me.
Eyes on me, Rylan. Hit dingers.
Disgrace the pitcher's family. Make the other players cry and stomp their butts into the ground.
Does everyone understand that? Does everybody understand that? Look fellas, look, look, look. There are two types of people in this world.
There's two types of people in this world. There's winners and there's losers.
And just so that we're clear, every time we step on this field, our goal is to be a winner.

And if your dad has said, oh, it doesn't matter whether you win or lose, just as long as you have fun,

well, I hate to say it, your dad's a loser.

Okay?

So let's get our hands in.

That team's pretty good, but we are gooder.

So let's go gooder on three So let's go gooder on three.

Let's go gooder on three. I could not have said it better myself, coach.
Your dad is a loser indeed. Let's take a quick commercial break and we'll be back with the game.
On this episode of the Commercial Break. We're still in touch with you, Beavs.
I say, hey, Beavs, come on over. We'll smoke a blunt.
We'll get on Pornhub. We'll play a little basketball, a little b-ball.
I'm in my timeout period, but trust me, when I come back, you're going to love it, Bebs.

We'll be back together before too long.

Paparazzi just waiting outside for us.

All right.

I got to go.

Hope with this whole thing is that you can look at what's happened in our life, and maybe you can recognize a little bit of your story in ours, and together we can all grow.

So the future of the podcast is going to be me bringing on people that I

love, that have changed my life, that have helped me

heal, that are helping me heal

and that's the future but the right

including four time avian winner

Farrah Abraham.

Farrah Abraham is my first

cat.

The next episode of

The Commercial Break starts

now.

Oh yeah cats and kittens. Welcome

Thank you. The next episode of The Commercial Break starts now.
Oh, yeah, cats and kittens. Welcome back to The Commercial Break.
I'm Brian Green. This is my dear friend and the co-host of this show, Chris and Joy Hoadley.
Best to you, Chris. Best to you, Brian.
Best to you out there in the podcast universe. How the hell are you? Thanks for joining us.
Were you a Girl Scout? I was. You were? Well, I was a brownie, which is the one right before Girl Scouts.
And then I think I did Girl Scouts for one year. So I just did like brownie one year and Girl Scout one year.
Did the brownies sell the cookies? I can't remember. I was so young.
Man, I'll tell you what. It's Girl Scout cookie time.
And that is a dangerous time for all of our waistlines around here. It is.
good the tag the tagalongs or whatever you call them now they have the um uh toffee something or other toffee ones are good oh my god absolutely addictive a regular old shortbread cookie with toffee pieces in it it is crack that's what it is it's crack now's crack. Now that I don't smoke crack anymore, that's my crack.
It's crack. There's no doubt.
And my kids love them and everybody loves them. We spend about $110 on cookies every year and they're gone within the week.
And they're getting more expensive and you're getting less of them. It's shrinkflation.
Shrinkflation is happening with the Girl Scout cookies. And I want to know something.
So one of the people in our family, loosely related to our family, sells them to us each year. We go to her to make sure we help her.
Yeah, she's our dealer. Yes, exactly.
She's our dealer charging $7 a box. But then somebody else on Facebook was selling them for $6 a box.
And then I go to the store the other day and there's a lady, like there is often in suburbia, selling the cookies outside for $15 a box. Whoa.
Why the price discrepancy? Yeah, I didn't think you could just charge whatever you wanted. Shouldn't it just be one flat rate? Like across the country, one flat rate for the cookies? Why do we have such- $15 a box.
$15 a box. I the difference between six and seven, okay, but 15.
Yeah, okay, I get the six and seven. You know, one person wants to make, I guess it's about how much money you raise and maybe not how many boxes you sell, but I think it should be converse.
The situation should be inverse. Like, I think that we should have how many boxes you sell, not how much money you make.
And I guess that doesn't make any sense either. But listen, I don't care what it is.
Just make it one price. $6 a box and you get as many as you did last year because this year- 15 is crazy.
I'm sorry. I'm stuck on the 15.
It's 15. It was 15.
And these people look like they were scamming people. I didn't like it.
And they were a little pushy about it too. They're like, hey, help your local Girl Scout troop.
And I was like, oh, I'm sorry. I already bought at the office or whatever.
And she was like, you can buy more, support local. And I'm like, how do you know I didn't buy them local? I didn't.
But how do you know I didn't buy them local? I got mine shipped in from North Carolina. You got a problem with that? Is that okay? I don't know.
Anyway, anybody who's got Girl Scouts in their life knows that this time of year is dangerous. And then we all got to wait another year to get them.
Though I do see that they are selling some of these at the grocery stores now. Really? Girl Scout cookies at the grocery stores.
Yes. I don't know what's going on, but I think I saw them at Whole Foods or Walmart or one of those things or something.
Those are all up in upheaval. Yeah.
Like, I mean, if they're cutting out the middleman, then how are those girls going to make money? You know what I'm saying? I thought that was the thing. They were exclusive to the Girl Scouts.
They are exclusive to the Girl Scouts, but I think the Girl Scouts have decided they can make money year round on this. Why wait? Well, that's true.
Yeah. And I don't know if the Girl Scouts are like the Boy Scouts, but, you know, the Boy Scouts aren't exactly on a hot run right now.
I don't know if you know this or not, but it's a tough time for the Boy Scouts in general. And the Boy Scouts, I believe, now have to allow girls in the Boy Scout troops if they ask.
So there you go. Do the boys get to go to the Girl Scouts? Sure.
Probably, I guess. I don't know.
I don't know. I went to two Boy Scout meetings, and I got to be honest, the guys who were leading the meetings were giving off vibes, if you know what I mean.
And I was only there for two things, whatever you call them, meetings, Boy Scout troop, whatever, conferences. I don't even know what the fuck you call them.
At the local Catholic church, the leaders were giving off vibes. I could feel it, and I was only 13 years old.
And they wanted to do a camping trip the very next weekend. And my dad was like, y'all want to go? And I don't want to go.
I don't know what's going on there, dad. Something's going on.
None of those troop leaders have kids. And they're all interested in having kids.
You know what I'm saying? I'm not saying anything bad was happening. I'm saying I, in my little pea brain at that time, I had a spidey sense about the whole situation.
I didn't like it. It was not for me.
But I did know a lot of Boy Scouts and I know some guys who are Eagle Scouts. Oh yeah.
Which is not easy to do. It's like when you become an Eagle Scout, I think you have to like do a bunch of...
You gotta tie a bunch of knots. Yeah, got to know how to tie multiple knots when you're an Eagle scout.
And skin a bear with your bare teeth or something like that. Start a fire.
Don't you have to catch a bald eagle and ride it around or something? I think so. Yeah, you have to make a fire with nothing but your fingers.
I mean, it's a complicated thing. And when I see an you know, be proud you're an Eagle Scout.
That was not an easy thing to do. But at what age do you stop saying Eagle Scout? Or do you always put that on your resume? I don't know.
I do remember interviewing. I wasn't involved in any of those things.
Yeah, no, I'm being either. I was never involved in any high achievement at any level.
None. Zero.
Not even like middle level achievement. I do remember interviewing a guy at Clear Channel when I was doing interviews.
I remember interviewing a guy and he had Eagle Scout on his resume. And I asked him.
I said, what is this about? What do you Eagle Scout? What are you doing there? And he said, well, you got to be at Eagle Scout's an important thing, recognized by the United States government's body, he went on like this whole diatribe and I was, I found myself really impressed and I didn't hire him because he's going to make me look bad. He's going to make me look bad.
I didn't need any more competition there. I looked pretty bad as it was.
I didn't need yet another guy. I felt like he was the guy who could take my job.

Never had hired the guy who's going to replace you.

You know what I'm saying?

Yeah.

Hire people who aren't going to replace you.

And I had plenty of those.

Who make you look good?

Yeah.

Well, they didn't let me hire anybody.

I mean, I only had one direct hire, and she never came to work.

So I don't know.

She had a period for like three months one time.

She really did.

I was like, oh, okay.

I mean, and I wasn't arguing.

No, sirree, Bob, was I arguing.

I knew better.

My mom raised me right.

I was like, okay, you take the 56 day off in a row, I guess.

Okay.

All right.

Update on FireFest as it stands right now, though when this episode comes out,

there will probably be more information about this.

But I just noticed something that is very interesting about this.

There's been an update. As we record this now, there's been an update to the FireFest 2 or to Billy McFarland's Instagram page.

He's telling people this is the only official communication that is going to come from me and my Instagram page. So with a rousing 620 likes, he has announced that Firefest 2 has changed venues.
I just noticed this. It's now at Playa del Carmen in the heart of the Mexican Riviera.
Mayan. Mayan Riviera.
Well, yeah, they call it the Mexican Riviera, the Mayan Riviera. It's Quintana Roo.
And that is, you know. I think that's kind of close to Tulum because that's where I just was.
I've never seen that pop up like on my maps of where I was. I do remember when Raphael visited Tulum a couple of times.
I do remember like pictures he tagged himself in had the Quintana Roo or whatever it was. But that's just a general location.
Like that's not a venue. Like that's not a hotel.
Well, so he's naming. So here's the thing.
And this is what this is. I think that I understood this is probably what was going to happen.
There is no stage. It's not a festival in the traditional sense.

This is more like South by Southwest,

where there are multiple places you're going to go to see different things.

Because now he's naming clubs at Playa del Carmen where things are going to happen.

So it says, happening at Playa del Carmen in the heart of the Mayan Riviera,

the venues are the Martina Beach Club, the Coralina Beach Club, the Mayan Water Complex, and other private villas and beach locations. I mean, if this doesn't sound like the most work you've ever done.
This is where everything could be happening, but we're not telling you what it is. Yes.
Everything's happening. Don't worry.
Just come. Just pay.
Yes. We have got some people booked that you're not gonna believe including bench warming college athletes from volleyball teams you're gonna love it it's gonna be awesome that's so crazy it's so crazy no one's playing no one's been announced still two months out not even less than two months out still no on the agenda.
Not one person has been officially announced, not one band, not even one sports star. He keeps putting pictures of sports stars on his Instagram, but I don't know that they're going and they haven't made an official announcement.
And now he's basically telling you he switched locations. He was doing it here.
Now he's doing it like 100 miles down the beach.

So now if you've bought tickets and you've got your hotel accommodations, you got to switch them to the new location. This is the disaster waiting to happen.
And I'm here for it. I hope that Netflix is on top of this.
Oh, they've got to be. I don't care if you're paying Billy.
Let Billy make a little money to pay those people back. Give them $100,000 and say, I want all access.

And you have absolutely no control over the editor's cut. I don't care if you're paying Billy.
Let Billy make a little money to pay those people back. Give him $100,000 and say, I want all access,

and you have absolutely no control over the editor's cut. None.
Zero. We're going to show everything.
It really is so wild that he would do this again. It's insane.
Completely buttoned up and on the up and up. not be 100% cocksure and fire ready, no pun intended, for this, for everything.
And if I was going to do it, I told you this, I would go to a bunch of millionaire investors and there are plenty of dum-dums out there with zeros in their bank account. And I would say, guys, in an escrow account, controlled by lawyers and actual festival managers who are not related to me in any way, shape, or form, never worked with them before you choose them.
I need money in a bank account because I have the PR ability to make this happen. My name.
I mean, he did. He did.
He did. He did.
He did. But he still does.
That's the thing is that he's so well known now because of all the drama around fire one he could have pulled this off had he done it the right way could have but he's not going to it's not going to happen and this also this change of venue last minute tells me that there's not many tickets that have been bought because he wouldn't you couldn't do this if everyone is planning on going one place you couldn't then just move it to another venue and i mean i guess, but that'd be a really shitty thing to do. So he's already leaving people stranded, essentially, is what's happening.
Here's some of the comments. Came for the comments.
Can't wait to see the Netflix series. Please, Netflix.
Does Playa del Carmen know about this? Some other person says, I'm calling him later on to let them know. Nice.
A venue change two months before the event. Sounds very fire-rific.
I heard Michael Jackson is going to play. Nope.
Breaking news. Fire 2 headliners include Snoop Cat, One Pock, Kanye East, Big Wayne, and 25 Cent.
Yeah, the only way he could really actually do anything would be if he did do the holograph, like a holograph concert for each day. Yes.
So someone said Blink-82 is taking the deposit money again. Because you don't know, but that's actually how it all transpires.
And Jeff would be able to elucidate on this a little bit. Yeah, you have deposit money.
You have to deposit. So let's say that you're hiring Blink-182, Pearl Jam, whoever, name some big band, Green Day, some big legacy act.
Let's say you're hiring them and their fee is $2 million for an hour and a half, festival appearance. They probably going to say to you, depending on the negotiations, they're probably going to say to you, we need 50% at least 30 days before the event, and then we need 50% when we walk on stage.
And by the time we get off stage, that better be in our account or there's going to be problems. And that's the manager's job of the band is to make sure that they run around cracking heads if people aren't getting paid.
And bands have, and they probably will in the future. You know, I would imagine, and this is just from stories that I've heard with much smaller festivals.
There have been occurrences where a band is late to go on stage because the money hasn't hit their account yet. Oh, yeah.
Yeah. It certainly happened.
Because that's the only thing they got. The only thing they got is to withhold the presentation.
And if someone wants them to play, I remember when we put on Jam Land Productions. It all goes back to Jam Land.
The Jam Land Mountain Blues Fest. Oh, the Mountain Blues.
The Mountain Blues Fest. Jam Land Productions presents the North Georgia Mountain Blues Fest.
I'm so bummed we didn't know each other. I know.
It was really. I would have been right there with you.
Of course you would have. You would have been like assistant associate producer running around, bringing me beer and helping everybody get high or something.
I don't know. But we showed up to this land up in the mountains, this beautiful cleared pasture.
This guy owned a bunch of land. He had multiple like cleared pastures up in the mountains.
And we said, okay, this is going to be the camping. This is where we're going to put the food.
And the food, by the way, was one Papa John's who was taking a golf cart. You had to take a golf cart up the mountain because it was hard to get cars up there.
So they were taking golf carts up and down the mountain, bringing pizzas and selling them by the slice. And we had- Well, at least it was Papa John's pizza and not bologna sandwiches.
It was, you're right. Yeah, fair enough.
People got fed and we we had kegs of beer up there and all the other stuff. But we went and bought them at the liquor store.
It wasn't like we had a liquor purveyor sponsoring us. We had zero sponsors.
But we had little vendors and stuff selling trinkets and shit like that. They sold zero trinkets.
But okay, whatever. We had like a thousand people that showed up to this festival.
Yeah. Who doesn't love a good blues fest? That's right.

Well,

mountain blues.

Yeah. Plus we just have some friends where you say party and they all show up.
Right.

And I'm sure we were charging like $15 to some people. Right.

It's most, we had like undercover cops show up.

Oh really?

Yes, we did from the County that we were in.

I'm not going to get into it, all the details, but the,

we had security down at the bottom of the Hill looking for, you know, for tickets and making sure that people didn't bring glass up there and stuff like that. They were loosely checking for shit.
And we had hired them. They were like our friends.
You look mean. Go down there.
So anyway. Some sort of muscle.
The muscle knew some of the sheriff's officers from town. And a couple of them tried to get in the festival plain clothes.
And the guys were like radioing up to us. They're like, I got a couple of cops here trying to get in.
What do you want me to do? And I was like, don't let him in. And they didn't let him in.
And the cops had to get turned away because he just refused to let him in. And it was like private land.
What are you going to do? Anyway, the the point is is that we had secured like some okay i think um i think tinsley ellis if i'm not sure was there donna hopkins band like there was some locally regional acts that you would if you were familiar with me yeah john skinny uh fat john popper um you know some local acts that, oh, we had moonshine, moonshine stills. Yeah, no moon taxi, no moon taxi here.
Moonshine. Moonshine taxi, that's right.
Moonshine taxi. but so like we're up there two days ahead of time because the stage we literally had to like take spiders off the stage like it was just this old stage oh yeah it was already there it was already there it had been set up by the guy for whatever reason i'm not sure but it's been there for years and years and years and then we rented this equipment and they put anyway the guy my partner pete in the in the whole thing he calls me and i'm up there and he says listen i have an opportunity to get perpetual groove up there a p-groove and for a late night set closing out saturday night midnight to like 3 a.m everybody eat your drugs everybody eat your drugs including p-groove we're all going to eat our drugs and do this together.
Right? And they were just like, they were well-known, but like a regional act at the time. And so I was a little unconvinced because Pete says, we got to get together $5,000 because I have 5,000.
They want 10,000. I have five, they have five.
And I don't know that these numbers, like the exact numbers, but basically we had half and then we had to put in the other half. He says, so are you willing to forego $5,000 in profit on the festival? Which we weren't going to make anyway.
But are you willing to forego in order to make it? And I said, yes. And he ran around like a chicken with his head cut off, trying to get formed.
Because back then, it wasn't like you get on your phone and just like zell somebody $5,000. It was this whole ordeal.

And I remember that P-Groove got there.

They had played an early set somewhere else at like 7 o'clock. And they got there right at midnight.

And we were all trying to set them up.

And they still hadn't been paid.

And the guy from P-Groove looked at me and he said, we're going to go because we're late.

We're going to get on stage.

But by the end of this, our manager's got to have that check.

Like got to have that check in hand or there's going to be problems. And luckily, we managed to pull it off.
I don't know if the check cleared, but we managed to give him a check. We wrote him one.
Yeah, we bounced a check to P-Group. But, man, they played a set.
They played a set. It was incredible.
And then we all got on a golf cart after. Like, me and the singer, and we got on a golf cart we put the keg like a pony keg on the back and we rode around and we gave people beers and and other nice stuff yeah that's the same festival where the guy cut his foot because somebody brought glass cut his foot he's like profusely bleeding but he had a pocket full of percocets so so he was just like kept chewing them.
And I was like, dude, you're going to die. Don't stop that.
Yeah, my God. Yeah, you're like on number five.
I think it's good. Let's take you to the hospital.
Eventually, we got an ambulance up there and took him to the hospital. He was badly bleeding.
The adventures of Jam Land Productions. Ah, Jam Land Productions.
Really the golden age for... Peak Brian is Jam Land Productions, if I'm being honest.
Peak Brian. If I'm being self-aware, Peak Brian is Jamland Productions.
Probably that night is Peak Brian. Me pulling off, bouncing a check to P-Groove.
Hoodwinking P-Groove into playing my 3 a.m. set at the North Georgia Mountain Blues Fest that went on to do no follow-up concerts.
First annual. Well, we did Mountain Jam, then we did Aqua Blues Fest, and then we did some other stuff.
But, you know, it was hard. You can't make a living doing that.
It's so hard. Yeah, I know.
Even Jeff knows that. Even if you're well resourced and all the best intentions.

It's a lot of work. It's a lot of work.

A lot of moving parts. Yeah, and to get you to year number

two takes a lot.

What's Memphis on year number six?

No, I think this is eight.

Oh, this is eight? I think so. We've been doing this

for eight years? Wow. I think it was

2017 was the first, so yeah.

Okay, alright. I remember Jeff talking about it

that when we went out to dinner and he was just

excited because he got in the green light to go spend

some money to do this. Yeah.
He was all excited. I was like, well, whatever you need, bro.
I had Jam Land Productions. So, if you need me to be there, let me know.
I, however, was waiting patiently by the phone and I still am. So, it tells you everything you need to know about Jeff's faith in Jam Land Productions.
I remember he was outside and we were like smoking a cigarette and he's like, yeah, bro. Yeah.
Yeah, I got you. Yeah.
Uh-huh. Mm-hmm.
Yep. Yeah.
No. Well, it was worth a shot.
Oh, you're welcome anytime. Well, thank you.
But's a question no okay i got kids yeah okay i know tickets i i know that i got but even that's hard i mean even that's hard you know it's so hard to get away an entire weekend of course maybe this year i'll ask astrid like can i please go please yeah i mean she might love me you You never know. She's a sweet lady.
She's so amazing. If I really said, hey, babe, I really want to go to this, we would figure out a way to make it happen.
But there's so much Catholic guilt in me, I wouldn't be able to sleep at night. I'd be like, ah, the fucking kids and the fucking dog and the fucking bills I got to pay, blah, blah, blah.
All right. Let's take a break.

When we get back,

I have a Carl Lentz update.

Carl has posted an apology video online.

It's about an hour long.

We probably won't get to all of it,

but I thought,

let's get it started.

Let's see what it's all about

and see what Carl's up to.

You remember Carl?

Of course.

Hey, girl.

Hey, Carl.

Hey, girl.

Justin Bieber's best friend for a while.

Yeah, Justin Bieber's preacher for a while.

Yeah.

Hillsong dude of the year.. Hillsong dude of the year.
Hillsong dude of the year. Victory V.
Victory V. Hard to preach on a full dick.
All right, got to go, girl. All right, we'll get into Carl when we get back.
Let me do something Brian has never done. Be brief.
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See, Brian? That really wasn't that difficult, now, was it? You're welcome. ID Tech, the first and most trusted tech camp, is where kids ages 7 to 17 find their people.
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All right. I got my Biebs hat on.
YouTube.com slash commercial break. That's right, girl.

Hey, girl. All right.
I got my phone here just just in case I gotta call somebody and pick up the phone. Go see her.
Hey girl. Alright that's a little note.
Hey girl. I hate to make an apology girl because I'm sorry I jizzed all over your mom's front door.
But I did leave her I did leave her a couple dollars just in case. Chrissy, what you up to over there? Oh, just hanging out.
I missed you. Listen, I've been talking to the Lord.
I've been walking with the Lord this morning and he said, you know what you need? A new picture of tits. And I got a call from the Lord and I answered it and he said, holy.
And I said, all right, I'll give her a call.

But this isn't me.

You know, you understand I'm just a vessel for the Lord.

And I have a vessel.

But just like a plane can't land with a full tank of gas, I can't preach with a full vessel.

So I got to release that vessel.

But I don't want to make things messy for you and your husband.

So just send that picture over. I'll release my vessel.
And then we'll get on to preaching. All right.
Well, I got a new haircut and I'm going to say I'm sorry here. I got to let you go.
I'm going to do this video. I had to talk to you.
Yeah, my wife wants me to make a video telling people I'm really sorry about all that stuff I did. And, you know, we got kids.
So she said, you better get on it, Carl. It only took me three years but here i am better late than never said god or jesus for one of them in that bible okay all right i gotta go i gotta call bbs here's carl in his basement seems like very very nice house i like carl got a beautiful house um.
And he's got a single microphone.

He's staring into the camera.

And this is the beginning.

We'll do some of his apology video.

I don't know how much of this dribble I can get through.

This just came out?

About three months ago.

Oh, really?

Yeah, but you heard it over here last.

But I noticed that Carl has been on a lot of podcasts lately.

Has he?

He's doing the tour?

Yeah, he's been doing the tour.

And a lot of them are religion-related.

And he's kind of doing the apology thing.

And here's the things I did wrong.

and he's been doing the tour. And I also know, and a lot of them are religion related, and he's kind of doing the apology thing.
And, you know, here's the things I did wrong, and here's the things I learned. But one of the things I did know about Carl is that back then, when he was hanging out with Biebs and all those people, he did Impulsive, the Logan Paul podcast.
Oh. You know, and that's one of the bigger YouTube channels in the world.
And he was on that. It was like seven years ago, but he was on it.

He was kind of a force to be reckoned with.

Yeah, he was.

He was high.

And he had a force to be reckoned with.

Oh, yeah.

High up.

Whee!

He was high, all right.

All right, let's hear what Carl has.

Let's give him a shot, Chrissy.

Okay.

Maybe he's a changed man.

In case you're just clicking on this and you don't have any idea about my life. Already with the music.
And angles yeah really okay all right he's gonna keep it interesting he knows how to produce a video he does uh my wife laura the lintz family um we have been out of the public life in sphere third woman in my thruple my maid for a couple years now actually it's moving on about four And we went through some things. Because that's an important thing to get across.
It's been four years since you've seen me. And now it's time for me to reclaim my throne.
That's right. As a family that some people know about, other people.
Trump's in office. And I figured now's a better time to scam people than ever.
So here I am. Don't.
But we're going to use everything we've been through to hopefully bring some new life and some new hope to people. And what you're going to see on these first couple episodes, especially this first one, you're going to see a couple that is healed and healing.
And it hadn't been the case always for us. We haven't been at a place where we've been able to talk about our own life and our own pain.
And we are now. So when you see us going through this story.
So good gravy. Get on with it.
Let's talk about the sucking and the fucking, Carl. What are these episodes he's doing? I guess he's doing a series of these, like a podcast, vodcast kind of thing.
You know, Astrid says I sound like an old man when I say vodcast. A video, a podcast that's on video on YouTube.
Yeah, you know, still seems seems full of shit. Yeah.
Yeah. It still seems full of shit.
And, you know, I think this was always the plan. Get out of the public eye for a while and then use the redemption story to make more fucking money.
Yep. We're looking to the future.
Cannot wait to talk about other things, but it's irresponsible for us not to talk about what happened because it was so public. And I think it's fair to be able to open it up and allow people to take from it what they can.
So in this first episode, we're going to answer some questions. You had a full-blown other girlfriend.
I had a couple of them, Chrissy. And I think it would be irresponsible of me to let all those women go without making this video first.
Listen, I'm not saying I'm a change. What you're seeing here is a man who's healed and a man who's healing from his deep, penile wounds.
Don't take pictures of me. I'm out of the public light.
I had to take a picture. All right.
One picture. One picture.
One picture. I'll sign it.
The Bieber hat is great. Yeah.
All the girls, you can take a picture of me. I stand in the back.
I'll autograph it with my hard sword of the Lord. I'm back, baby.
I'm back. I love it.
I love the good gravy that comes from fame and fortune and money. And he's from heaven, baby.
And he's from heaven. I still got a beautiful house.
I've been laughing all the way to the bank. All right.
And I got a new pair of glasses from Wabi Parker. This video is sponsored by Wabi Parker.
He might have had some hair worked on. Oh, yeah.
Yeah. I Frank Bonato I got Frankie's follicles He had a hair transplant His head to my head And I said, listen, you're too old But let me carry the cross No pun intended I got you Give me your follicles All right And look at my beard Salt and pepper Oh yeah Oh yeah, I'm a change man And I still go to the tanning bed, darling.
I got a nice tan. I'll tell you what.
Four years in the sun. This has been a lot of fun.
We had a good time here at the left household. Good time.
Kids are healthy and in therapy and homeschooled. They can't go out in public.
But it's okay. I'm back, baby.
Here I am. I've got a nice microphone.
You microphone You see that? Yeah it's nice He's got a lot of gold chains on Oh yeah the gold chains Oh wait Does his one necklace have an L? Yeah Probably Because he's that kind of guy We'll have like Why has it taken us so long to talk? Why is Laura still married to me? Who's at fault? We handle some of the real hard questions. Why is Bieber acting crazy? We're still in touch with me, Biebs.
I say, hey, Biebs, come on over. We'll smoke a blunt.
We'll get on Pornhub. Play a little b-ball.
We'll play a little, a little b-ball. I'm in my time-out period, but trust me, when I come back, you're going to love it, Biebs.
We'll be back together before too long. Paparazzi just waiting outside for us.
All right, I gotta go. Hope with this whole thing is that you can look at what's happened in our life, and maybe you can recognize a little bit of your story in ours, and together we can all grow.
So the future of the podcast is going to be me bringing on people that I love, that have changed my life, that have helped me heal, that are helping me heal, and that's the future, but the right... Including four-time avian winner, Farrah Abraham.
Farrah Abraham is my first guest. We both had a time out, but now we're back preaching to the Lord.

Preaching the good word, Chrissy.

The good word of sucking and fucking.

I love it.

It's a time out of tradition, us preachers.

Now, this is our story.

So for those of you that are brand new to this, we used to be in ministry.

I made some mistakes that cost us a lot.

Everything.

And we talk about it all. Not everything.
Not everything. When I got caught, I gave my wife an ultimatum.
I said, open marriage or I'm leaving. And all that money is in my chest hair.
That's what they want. That's what the ladies want.
And now we're here. We're in this space.
And I'm really excited about it. So thank you.
Which is a 5,000 square foot beautiful home overlooking Napa Valley. I want to thank you all very much.
The good years were good. And I'm a good saver.
For checking it out. Episode 1.
Hope you enjoy it. B-side.
Okay. Download the app for additional content.
Oh, Lord. Listen, I'm not arguing the guy's right to make money.
And maybe this is a redemption story. Maybe he is learning some things from this.
So I just want to be clear. You don't have to make money on the redemption.
Yeah, but this is an improv comedy podcast. And as far as I'm concerned, it was all bullshit in the first place.
And this is like Fyre Fest 2. You know what I'm saying? Uh-huh.
All right. Lights on.
Lights on. Lights on.
With Carl. Ocean.
So when you go through something like we've gone through,

a crisis or something

that's really hard, you either

Oh, his wife is on the podcast.

Is that her? Yes, that's her.

Oh. Okay, he's got his leather jacket

on, his chains. He's got his leather jacket on.

It does say L on that.

I despise

you.

I thought his wife was blonde. Break down and...
No, I think that was the girl you were sleeping with. Oh, okay.
Yeah. Two different people.
Or maybe this is the girl you were sleeping with. Yeah.
I don't know. Who knows? And let it define you for the rest of your life.
Or you get up and you fight and you try to break through and remind yourself that we're all writing our story and nobody else can control the true real narrative of your life and we have had a journey of making sure we don't lay down i mean am i right or am i right babe we've had a journey we're writing our own story all that slick bullshit all right girl come on girl you knew it i and let a hard chapter define us and by hard chapter i mean my dick so it's a real pleasure and a real honor to be sitting here a little bit surreal for me my hope for this is that we can at least show people that there is another side to a tragic story because as it's as it stood before we've done this she looks like she wants yeah i don't know this is not tragic this is you cheating cheat finding a girl in a park yes and sending her nude photographs and asking her to do the same and then sleeping with her and then repeated multiple affairs and then apparently other shenanigans that went on in the church. This is not tragic.
It's only tragic if it happens to you. She is part of the tragedy.
You are the reason for the tragedy. Yes.
It's not tragedy. We haven't spoken.
We haven't talked. We participated in a documentary, which we'll talk about.
But I think for us, most of the people know one side of the story, which is, Yes, it is true. I got fired from my job.

I... But I think for us, most of the people know one side of the story, which is, yes, it is true.

I got fired from my job.

I broke my marriage vows.

I broke the trust of a lot of people.

I had an amazing position as a pastor and a leader, and I fell on my face. Blew it.

That is true.

That's part of the story.

And we're here today, still still marriage still have the ability to

get a real hot dick it's like my victory b yeah thanks to why brian 3000 this episode sponsored by yb parker why brian 3000 why brian 3000 when you're in a hard position Use Why Brian 3000

When you despise your wife and she despises you

Why Brian 3000 When you're in a hard position, use Y-Brien 3000.

When you despise your wife and she despises you,

Y-Brien 3000 overrides that overwhelming urge to stay limp.

21 years, shout out to you.

Our family's stronger than ever.

Shout out to my wife.

Shout out.

Shout out to you.

Which is what I was doing when I was screwing that 19-year-old lovely.

I said, praise Jesus.

I'm sorry. shout out to you which is what i was doing when i was screwing that 19 year old lovely i said praise jesus praise my wife and we have more joy and and more peace than probably we've no carl you have more joy okay let's just be clear about that this is your dumb idea for hat and that's part So I hope when people maybe do talk about something that we do.
Hey, go cheat. You'll find more joy and happiness than you ever found on the other side.
Listen, everybody loves a redemption story. Am I right? Or am I right? Don't you love a redemption story, honey? Of course.
Let me put a lot of words in your mouth before you start talking. That's what's going on here.
Well, totally. Yes.
Yeah, she's just sitting there. She's just sitting there looking nervous and like she wants to crawl out of her skin, angry with him, about to cry.
And he's just putting words in her mouth because he's telling her the narrative he wants her to follow. And if I were in the same position, like true contrition comes from the ability to let other people tell you just how hurt they have been by your actions without narrative.
And that is the hardest kind of apology to make is where you have to sit there and listen to just how terrible it was to bounce a check to P.Grew when they really needed that $5,000. And I'm sorry.
I'm sorry. Or when you promise people you're going to have a funny comedy podcast, but you keep showing up every day in their inbox with this dribble.
I'm sorry. I really am.
I'm sorry. That's not a narrative.
That's just me. Those parts are true.
We don't need to do this podcast. The world definitely doesn't need another podcast just to have one.
What is going on in the background? Can we just look at this for a second? Yeah, there's a neon light. Well, I don't know.
That's why I'm kind of confused because he's got two camera angles. And so when the camera is at one angle, you can see this book.
He looks like he's in a lawyer's office with law books in the back. This is my sex dungeon.
And a hand, like with a piece, doing the piece symbol. No, no, no, no.
Chrissy, that's a heavenly penis jizzing. It's a jizzing accent.
I don't know if you get that. So I told my wife, I said, if we're going to do this podcast, let's do it in our red room downstairs.
In our dungeon. No, not sex dungeon.
I appreciate it. But then from this angle, now you see some kind of a neon light in the back.
And a lion, maybe, statue? Yeah, well, the first part of this, I think, was preemptive, and he was in a different location. No, no, I know that.
I don't know. I don't know what's going on here.
Yeah, but it certainly does. It looks like a corona light sign.
It's super like 4K, 8K, like lighting has been obviously done up correctly. Yeah.
Carl, can you help us? Yeah. Seriously.
Responsible to share what's happened in our journey because we have led a lot of people in our lives. And up until this point, I think there's people who are interested to see what I'm going to do with this, what you're going to do with this, what happened to our marriage, what happened to our lives.
And so we're going to use every bit of this to give people hope. I think people see people fall and fail and they kind of like that.
But it's like, I think there's also this other side of redemption and this other side of like, no, but you can get up again.

And you can make it.

And make money from it.

And I think.

Yes, I think you can get up again,

and I think you can replenish your bank account

by telling people you are still godly and have them show up every Sunday.

Yeah, because what were they going to do each on their own?

Well, I was going to do OnlyFans,

and Carl was going to go on tour with Bieber. Yeah, OnlyFans, that's right.
Carl was going to sleep with Hailey Bieber. For us, our story has been that.
It was out there for a lot of people to see, which was really hard. But I think this side they also can see is the healing and what can happen when you work hard at a relationship.

Yeah, and I think people don't sometimes understand that talking about this stuff, it is hard.

It is triggering.

I don't know.

Why is he sitting on a stool and he's so quick to interrupt her?

This sounds like an episode of the commercial break, A TCB infomercial with Kathleen Madigan.

I mean, if we're all healing and apologizing,

let's do it now.

I'm sorry to Kathleen Madigan

for apparently interrupting you too much.

Kathleen didn't say that.

I didn't think I did either.

But everybody on YouTube agrees,

Brian's an asshole.

So let me start my apology right here. Get up on a stool.
That's right. All right.
I know we're only like one minute into this, but we're going to have to take a break. We might have to get back to this next week, but all right, let's take a break.
And when we get back, we'll try and plow through a little bit more of this dribble and we'll be sure to let the world know on a future episode. Or you could make fun of us.
That'd be fine, too. We might not air that, but maybe.
Oh, and if you're shy, that's okay. Just send a text.
We'll respond. Now, I'm going to go check the mailbox for payment while you check out our sponsors, and then we'll return to this episode of the commercial break.
This is a message from sponsor Intuit TurboTax. Taxes was getting frustrated by your forms.
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Seek guaranteed details at TurboTax.com slash guarantees. All right, back here with Carl Lentz on his apology tour.
Episode number one of his apology podcast, apparently. It's an apology podcast.
It's called Turn the Light On or Down or something. I'm not sure.
We'll get back to it. Here we go.
We have put to rest a lot of things, but bringing this up, it's another credit to you for being brave enough to talk about this. Because for me, a lot of it is humiliating.
A lot of it is embarrassing. A lot of it is you just want to look at it and shake your head.
But we're choosing to go. The least I can do is put our story out there and say, hey, if this helps you avoid the pain and the tears.

So thank you for even.

The least I could do is get a book deal with Simon Schuster and put some more money in our bank account.

You know what I'm saying?

Right.

I'd like to announce CarlCoin, sponsored by WhyBrien3000.

CarlCoin now available on all major crypto Carl coin. Also known as cock coin.
Cox for Christ coin. Swords for the Lord.
Sword for the Lord. The hard sword of the Lord is my new church.
We're going to be female focused. I want to give back to the ladies.

I know I've done you wrong.

So I'll be teaching pole dancing on Sunday.

Mud wrestling on Monday nights for the kids.

It's going to be fun.

We're going to have fun at this church.

Female focused.

Female focused.

Female focused. I'm sorry, focused.
I meant focused. I'm sorry.
Okay, honey, back to you. What did you have to say? You were talking? I'm sorry.
Agreeing to do this. It's a big deal.
I know it's been emotional for both of us. And I know it's going to be worth it.
So that's what we're going to do on this podcast, especially early on. We're going to talk about our story.
Okay. Get to it.
I know it's going to be worth it. So that's what we're going to do on this podcast, especially early on.

We're going to talk about our story.

Okay, get to it.

I know.

We've been talking about what we're going to talk about.

Let's talk about it.

Because everybody else has.

And I think it feels good.

It feels natural to be able to speak to it.

And then we're going to move on. Yeah, that looks totally natural.

It feels good.

I feel great.

I'm feeling good.

I'm feeling great.

What about you, honey?

You're feeling great?

Keep her mic muted, please. You're feeling great? Yes, nod your head.
If you need help, blink twice. You're feeling great.
I'm feeling great. Everybody loves this.
This is wonderful. This is high energy stuff.
High energy. Do different things, but as it stands right now, we're going to try to answer as many questions that we've been told by people we love.
We asked around, so what do you think would help people the most? What are the questions that people are asking? And some of them are like, ah. For you to move to Thailand, never to be heard from again.
And so we're going to do that. We're just going to go question for question and see where we go, but with the hopes that people will be able to look into.
You're going to take questions? Why didn't you let us know ahead of time? Yeah, I have questions. I got lots of questions.
Like, how much does that Rolex cost on your list? Just thinking and go, I can glean from that. I won't do that.
And that's our story as we know it. So whatever you want to say, whatever you want to ask, shoot for the stars.
Yeah. So I get a lot of women and men on my DMs or reaching out to me who have gone through similar situations.
And so that's why I wanted to do this because it's hard to answer a lot of things in that setting. But to be able to share our story and help people in that setting.
I hear you, girl. Excuse me for a second.
I'm going to rub myself if you don't mind. You're looking sexy today, girl.
Mm-hmm. Mm.
That may be struggling or don't know what to do in whatever situation they find themselves, I think. What's that? It's got a neon cross in the back.
Yeah, a neon cross. The Motley Crue neon cross.
Yeah. The cross you don't find often at churches.
I'm hoping that this is going to help them with, you know, whatever they're going through. There's no way it can't.
No. Have you found, I think this is interesting.
There's no way it can't. There's no way it can't.
I'm too important. Yeah.
I'm too important. I think too much of myself.
What a marriage breakdown and a church breakdown looks like from a different side. And I think I would never have known what I feel like I know now about it, how lonely it is, how hard it is.
And we've seen people reach out that have just been through so much stuff and they've just been out there floating around yeah and i didn't realize that was like a real thing yeah can be worse than ours was just public oh oh it can be worse it can be worse than cheating in a marriage that happens the 50 of marriages it's this is just you guys are pretending like you're the yeah ground zero for all things terrible that happen you brought this on yourself carl we had amazing had amazing friends that stepped up and helped us, but that's not the case for a lot of people. We had some support systems with our family.
That's not the case with a lot of people. And you just don't know what to do.
And so I look forward to that changing. We can be a part of that.
And people are in marriage situations where you feel lonely and you feel like you can't get through it. We are evidence, absolute evidence that you can, you know, and that there's hope after a lot of pain.
There's still time, actually, for it to fall apart. Yeah, don't worry, Carl, you'll fuck it up sooner or later.
I'm sure of it, first of all. Second of all, I mean, he's falling short of saying, call me if you have a problem.
I can only imagine. I can only imagine what it must be like to have a family, to like cheat on your spouse and then so publicly have a blow up and then have to show up at Thanksgiving dinner with your spouse's family.
It's got to be the most uncomfortable thing in the world, but you got to do it. You know, you got to do it.
If you want to stay with your loved one, you got to do that. More money in the future.
That's right do it you know you got to do it if you want to stay with your loved one you got to do that money in the future that's right and you said you said before like we're going to tell our story and then we'll move on i don't know that we'll ever move on it's kind of yeah it's a part of our life and so probably through this yeah but he wants to move i don't know that i'll ever let you forget it but yeah he wants to move on that's right it is going to come up in different ways yeah um so yeah i wanted to ask you some questions yes ma'am um that i think people want to know especially because you know i was telling you about this but you kind of three years ago stuff happened you you know apologized publicly um and like an Instagram post yeah he did yeah it was like an Instagram post like hey yeah I've been fucking the hot maid hey listen yeah I've been fucking the hot maid but all things considered I have been doing a lot of preaching too so I figured it's like a scale. It's bad and it's good.
I show up to church every Sunday, I wipe my sins clean, and then I wipe my dick on somebody's curtains. Okay? All right? What's worse? Honestly, let's be real.
Who's not jizzing on the curtains? And so I think a lot of people are like, what's happened? Like what's, you know, they probably have a lot of things that they think about you and things that they've seen in the media, things that people have talked about that we haven't answered. I mean, like everybody's just been on bated breath waiting to see what they have been doing for three years.
I've been in a constant state of depressive solitude since Carl's Instagram post, waiting for Carl to answer my questions about what happened. Though it seems pretty clear what happened.
It was a hot chick at the park and you fucked her and you got caught. Yes.
She decided to tell the world you fucked her. Maybe you talking about, if I ask you the questions and then you.
Yeah. Perfect.
Yeah. Perfect.
Great. Go.
Go do it. I'm embarrassed, but go ahead.
Yeah. Because I want to crawl inside a hole and die, but sure.
No problem. I'm here.
Could be fun. Yeah.
Perfect. Could be fun.
It could be fun for her because she's like, I'm just, I just want to throw you against a wall. Here's a roast I would like to see.
Yes. This is the roast.
It's coming. Yes.
Okay. Let's go through it.
Yes. So, firstly, why do you think we waited so long? Or why did you wait so long to talk? What? We waited.
That's not a great question. No.
What happened? Right. How did you meet her? What did she look like? Right.
What birthmarks did she have? Was she better in bed? Yeah. All the things.
He had a full-blown relationship with her, didn't he? He did. He was like dropping stacks of money off at her mom's house or something.
Well, he didn't even tell her he was married at first. That's right.
And he was sending like weird photographs from the car and I'm on my way to meet the Lord and Lord and here's my dick and belong to talk because we had a bigger priority which was to save our family yes more accurately for me to save my own life and then work to try to save our marriage and then work to try to save our family.

And very difficult because my instinct is to go to war immediately. Save my own life.
My instinct is to. Was that the order? Yeah.
Is that the order in which things needed to be taken care of? First and foremost. Me.
Yeah. First.
First. First and foremost, finish myself off so I didn't get blue balls.
Second of all, take lots of pictures so I had material to not have blue balls in the future. Third, take all the money I could from the church.
Fourth, call you and tell you there may or may not be a TMZ article coming out. Could I pay you to stay around? And then number three, the kids are somewhere.
And I don't know. They're 12 or something, 13.
But click and subscribe. Like and comment on your favorite videos.
Go to our Patreon. Why does he have a QR code popped up there? Because there's a Patreon.
He's selling a book or some shit. Who knows? Fed myself.
Get ad-free episodes here. So he has a Patreon.
Yeah. Lovely.
We're going to have ads? Yeah. have ads yeah well no we aren't but the people who watch this regularly will give context give clarity and the way that all that went down there we had to make a choice right up front which way are we going to handle this chapter and for me and you i think the best advice that we got was you cannot for me you cannot save face and save your life at the same time i remember hearing that going well that doesn't work for me because i want to salvage my reputation i want to tell people what happened i want to do yeah that's all he cared about was his reputation yeah that's it i want to salvage my reputation.
You just hurt the woman. The thing about being famous is, I imagine, I don't know, but I imagine, is that everything is amplified.
And the people in your life sometimes didn't choose that amplification. They didn't choose to make the speaker so loud.
And so when you do something like this, when you fail the church, when you fail your marriage, when you're cheating on your spouse and your kids know about it, is that it's everywhere all the time. And all you care about is your reputation.
How about caring about the feelings and protecting the people that you love or trying to, you know, they may not necessarily want your protection in that moment, but trying to shield them from some of this by coming out and immediately say, this is what I did. I'm sorry.
I did jizz on the curtains.

I'm laughing.

You're a... By coming out and immediately saying, this is what I did.
I'm sorry. I did jizz on the curtains.
I'm laughing. Your hat.
It's so great. It's hard to preach on a full dick.
It's hard to preach with a beaver hat on. I was going to say, preach it, Bongo Brian.
Cartoon Mickey. What was his name? Cowboy Ken.
Cowboy Ken. There you go.
And I need to get in a place of healing because I am in deep, deep trouble. And I really chose...
That's an understatement. Healing over reputation protection.
It's very difficult. It wasn't easy.
I mean, just all about the him, him, him, reputation. What did I look like? What was going on? Yeah, I think he's a narcissist.
But I think you have to be a narcissist to believe that you're the one that's talking to God and everybody else needs to talk through you. And I think that's a certain kind of sickness, if I'm being honest.
The better it got. It didn't mean the voices ever went away or you could see things out of the corner of your eye or hear stories or see things being spun.
But once you make that choice to go, I don't really care. At the end of the day, there's nothing to salvage here.
People are going to think what they're going to think. All I care about is trying to save what matters.
All I care about is trying to save this family. Think what they're going to think.
I mean, well, it was just kind of cut and drop. Yeah, there's nothing else to say.
It was like somebody's opinion that you cheated. And listen, can I just be clear about this? You cheated on your wife.
You didn't murder anybody. This happens all the time, all the time.
I'm not trying to wash away the pain that it caused everybody else in your life, but I'm saying this isn't like the world's most surprising sin. You are in good company when it comes to preachers who have cheated on their wives or had sex affairs or whatever you're in good company it kind of it's kind of like part and parcel you know milk and cookies coffee and cream preachers and extramarital affairs it happens i was in really really really deep deep trouble and i remember immediately thinking that this is going to be a different road um the night the night that all that stuff went or the day after at least, we were staying at a friend's house because we had sold our house.
In New York. In New York.
In Jersey. Yeah, and staying in a friend's house in Brooklyn, and they graciously let us use their apartment.
And when all this stuff went down, we were obviously just shell-shocked, reeling. Why were you shell-shocked? You knew the whole time.
What? obviously just shell-shocked reeling why were you shell-shocked you knew the whole time what we were shell-shocked shell-shocked you knew the whole time you were a part of it your dick was there right and they were staying at somebody's house staying at a friend's house that had been a really weird dinner conversation so carl i don't know if you've read any newspaper ever today, but it says here you were dicking down some girl you met at the doggy park. Yeah.
It makes me feel weird to even talk about it. But then I got a call from the person who lives there.
And he said, basically, I want, you know, somebody that worked for him. He said, you guys have to leave because the owner of this place does not want to be associated with you.
Oh, so it was like a friend's place. Oh, damn.
Yeah, it was probably a church-related property is my guess. It was probably Bieber.
Yeah, it was probably Biebs. Yes, you might be right.
Yeah, you might be right about that. Yeah.
Probably with some kind of celebrity. So some kind of celebrity, somebody associated with the church, somebody high up, a politician, whatever.

Like where does he want us to go?

He doesn't care.

He wants you out within a couple of hours.

And we are – all of our stuff's here.

Our kids are here.

There's some photographers and reporters around taking photos and all this stuff is flying around. Our kids are like, what's going i remember we had to take everything we have in this apartment daddy did you cheat daddy what's a hard sword of the lord daddy who's that oh that's uh that's anti-stardust Daddy met her at a special club for heavenly adults.
Late at night. In Brooklyn.
And then we got a U-Haul and a U-Haul van. And we're just throwing stuff in there.
And our kids still don't really know what's going on. And we're just, you know, I'm in like a weird comatose trance mode of just don't even know where I am.

You're trying to survive. And me and Roman were in the U-Haul and we just started driving.
I would have been running around with a butcher knife. Oh my God.
I would not have been wanting to be in 50 yards of that woman that night for sure. And I do, I can kind of understand.
And we all understand the stress of being caught in the corner and like,

don't know what to do, don't know where to go. If you've lived enough life, you've been in some situation that you've probably gotten yourself into that you don't know how you get yourself out of that's very stressful and that feeling of just like, what do I do now? What do I do now? So we started driving.
I remember getting on the highway, pulling out of, you know, Williamsburg, Brooklyn.

And I just remember thinking, feeling of just like, what do I do now? What do I do now? Well, we started driving. I remember getting on the highway,

pulling out of, you know, Williamsburg, Brooklyn.

And I just remember thinking like, what are we doing?

Where are we going to go? And Roman's next to me.

He's my little guy still. He's dad.
What are we doing?

Why don't we have anywhere to go?

And I couldn't get ahold of anybody at that point.

Yeah. No one was taking your calls.
So I called Stardust and we stayed at her house for the next couple of weeks yeah what do you mean where do we go i mean they had to have like a hotel a hotel exactly that's where you go that's where people go when they need a place to stay is a hotel an airbnb uh something rent a home real quick i don't know you know you can rent a home overnight almost a lot of people were kind of gonna handle this however way they're gonna handle it and we finally found our friend kim clark who said come and stay with us in connecticut and our first couple nights we really felt like man the whole world has ended you know we have been it was covid as well it's covid so we have no idea which way is up right now we're're in trouble. And that was one of those nights I'll never forget.
I'll never forget sitting in that car looking at my boy. Yeah, I bet.
Yeah, I bet that was one of the most intense feelings. I do have empathy for, even if you got yourself into the situation, it never feels good.
That kind of stress never feels good. And with children, every move that you make is also amplified.
And so I can't imagine being in a similar situation. In a U-Haul van, driving around, nowhere to go, what do we do? Kids are too young to understand what's going on.
But hey, at least you don't have blue balls. Oh, exactly.
At least you didn't preach on a full dick. That's right.
Belongings in two U-Hauls going like, how did I get here? Is this real life? And that's why we made decisions. And it's all of the ministry.
Shit. For me being a control guy, letting it go was not easy.
Which part? The girl? I let it go all all right. I was letting it go all over the place.
I'll tell you what. I let it go on Tuesday, then on Thursday morning, then by myself on Friday, and then in the church parking lot.
I was just letting it go for a control guy. That was kind of hard, I'll tell you that one.
All right. Well, listen.
We can't do Carl forever. I wish we could.
Oh, my God. We can get back to it, though.
We want to go more into it because now I'm kind of interested. Me too.
Now I'm like, okay, what did happen? Like, what is the minutiae of how this all went down? See, he's getting me. Now he's roping me in.
It's a silly story. God damn it.
It's the good lighting and microphone. Yes, it is the good lighting and microphone.
You know, there's a reason why people liked him. It's because he's an engaging character, right? But most narcissists are engaging characters.
And I do feel for her. This is not her fault.
And so I have a lot of empathy for where she's at. And I can only imagine what she was feeling at this time.
Oh my God. He's talking about how he's feeling, but how was she feeling? It is all about him.
But let's be honest. It was always all about him.
And she knows that. She married him.
She knows what's going on. Well, and then Hillsong Church is no more either.
The church that he... Well, then didn't it turn out that there was other stuff going on with the original founders? All kind of shit.
Yeah. And they paid high-priced attorneys to it's just all shenanigans it's like you know i'm not against religion no there's some really good churches yes around it's the ones that want to be famous and make it's the ones that become all-powerful yes that just really just start to destroy lives in so many different ways.
And Carl is a testament to that. When you're a rock star preacher, you know, and you're playing fast and loose, you got a bunch of...
On a full dick. Yeah, on a full dick.
You got to empty it. All right.
Well, listen, maybe we'll get back to Carl next week. Maybe we won't.
Hope you have a good weekend and all that jazz. TCBpodcast.com.
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if you want to be on the next episode. Okay, Chrissy, that's all I can do for today.
I think

so. But I'll tell you that I love you.
I love you. I'll say best to you.
And best to you out

there in the podcast universe. Until next time time Chrissy and I will say we do say

and we must say goodbye Yeah, boy!