76: Captain Papa and the Pirate Kids

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Yeah, yeah, you know what time it is.

It's time for the geek in this podcast.

Mega Rand, Jesse and Dodger.

What up?

Let's go.

Yo, it's the weekend.

Yeah, it's time to geek out.

Let it begin.

Go on, stream and shout.

It's Jesse and Dodger.

So give them a follow and see what the geekiners are all about.

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Yeah, it's time to geek out.

Let it begin.

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Now follow, subscribe, and turn to some.

Yo, it's the weekend.

Yeah, it's time to geek out.

Let it begin.

Go on, scream and shout.

It's Jesse and Dodger.

So give them a follow, number one, keep podcast without a doubt.

You know,

there was a brief moment where I thought we were going to do this professionally.

And out of all the things that went wrong today,

this would be the time that we come together and really show that we have what it takes to do a production of this level.

Right.

And

well, we failed that.

So that's

where do we go from here?

We introduced Crike and hello.

Welcome to Geekenders.

Hello.

Dodger and Jesse.

It's lovely to be here again.

Thank you so much for having me on Geekenders, the best way to start off your weekend if you're a geek or it's the end.

Of the week.

Of the week.

Oh, yeah.

The week?

Sure.

Oh, you make sense.

Yeah, it's all coming together a little bit.

What is happening over there right now?

Is this an annual Kariken goes to harass, I assume, farm animals trip?

He goes to harass.

He comes to visit and stays with us for a few days about once a year.

Yeah.

Yeah, so this is this is the

yearly, although you're being kind of a globe troubled right now.

Yeah.

You're going all over the place.

I was in Poland

and then I'm also maybe going to Sweden and Netherlands and Switzerland.

So I've been hopping around.

But

I've been trying to travel more.

Can I ask, is this a

I've had a few of these moments where someone was like, hey, do you want to come check out a game in X Country?

And I'm like, Okay, but then I have to justify why the hell I would go overseas for one game for like two days.

And so I'm like, I'll travel, Jesse.

Okay.

All right.

We're in the same page.

I was flown out by 11-bit to see the alters in Poland.

And then they're like, all right, we'll schedule your flight for like the next day.

And then I was like, what if you scheduled it for three weeks later?

And they were like,

okay.

Sure.

And so I've just been kind of traveling around Europe and,

you know, trying to be a little bit of a digital nomad, which has been fun.

Yeah, I get it.

That is, I've done that before.

It is a solid way to just be like, you know,

life gave me this.

I'm going for it.

So, yeah.

good.

Very cool.

Why did you decide to ruin your fun by going to visit Dodger and Sam?

Well, I want, I want, hold on.

Okay.

Just just to just to lay the groundwork here, Jesse has never visited us.

Yeah.

I

know who I am.

And I know that a farm is not a place for a man of my caliber and distinction.

Oh, yes.

All of my smoking jackets would get dirty.

I simply couldn't.

So fair.

You don't want a little chicken wandering around pooping on the ground and you just don't know when it's going to happen?

No.

That's been us the last few days.

Yeah.

Yeah.

But today, specifically, the issue

is it's gotten very warm here and

I think the door to my office has swollen and it's got this weird, like convoluted old lock on it that where you have to press a bunch of buttons in a in the right order.

And I was pressing the buttons going, it doesn't feel like anything's activating in there.

And the door would not open.

So we did, I feel like, I feel like we tried everything we could.

Short from busting a door.

Breaking the door, yeah.

So

I did not know that you had.

layers of security on.

I thought it was just a door and you guys couldn't figure out how to get the door open.

And I was like...

No, it's the lock.

The lock is doing its job too well, maybe.

So

that's the issue.

Because our office doors are outside.

They're not like part of the main house.

Okay.

So yeah, they're secure.

They've got locks.

They've got locks on them.

Real ass locks.

Now, do you have to

break?

Chicken poop to get to it?

Is that like the minefield?

Yeah, that is part of it.

You have to go through the chicken coop in order to get to the office door.

Okay.

Yeah, I think the first time I visited here, I did cover my new shoes in, I think it was pig poop at the time.

And

there's still like a little stain on them.

And every time I see it, I'm like, oh, yeah.

That's when I touched grass that one time.

Yeah, it like reminds you of us, right?

The shit stain reminds me of you guys.

Yeah, the pigs are a lot bigger now.

The poops are way bigger.

Yeah, I've avoided that.

My favorite part of the entire thing.

You love it out here, Jesse.

Come My favorite part of the entire thing was the poops are bigger.

They are.

They are.

The pigs are bigger.

Life goes on.

The poops get bigger.

It stands to recent.

Nah, grass is for suckers.

I went to the Dodgers game for my birthday.

My

so sunburned.

Just so, like, thank God for a hat.

My face is fine.

My arms,

they hurt.

Oh, no.

Can we see?

Oh,

not now.

It's fine now.

It's fixed.

Yeah.

I put that like I went full aloe.

It was great.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

But the two days afterwards, my arms were so red.

They hurt.

I don't know if this is like a natural response to your body being like, we must defeat the burn.

But my arms felt like.

Anyone who's ever lifted anything ever, like if you go to the gym or you just had to carry a bunch of boxes for moving or whatever, that sort of day after, we were like, oh, what the hell big time but i did nothing and i think it was just my my arms being like we gotta fix this dude work extra hard my arms

it felt like i'd been lifting boxes all day it was crazy and i don't know why i assume right the body but uh the body yeah the body do weird stuff yeah

i'm good now though so i guess it worked shout out to the body Shout out to the body.

Shout out to the body.

Shout out to the body.

I want to admit this now because I feel like if we're going to shout out to the body, I should do a real shout out.

One time,

I'm not going to say where, how, or why.

Let's say Jesse, a guy, a friend of mine, we'll call him Jay Cox, a friend of mine,

might have gotten extremely high.

You know, my friend, he was crazy that night.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And this friend of mine might have had the realization and then started feeling terrible.

that he never once thanked his white blood cells for looking out for him.

And then he sat there and was like, no one ever says thank you.

They do so much work.

And I think about that all the time, bro.

I'm like,

thanks, little buddies.

You're doing it.

You're really in there keeping me going.

And I love you for that.

And none of you thank them.

No one thanks their blood cells.

They're doing work.

That actually reminds me of a recent memory I just had.

So I went to visit my 92-year-old grandmother in Switzerland, and it was really nice to spend some time with her because I get to see her that often.

But at one point, she started like kind of cradling her arm in like a kind of a unique way.

And I was like, oh, are you okay?

And she's like, yeah, like it hurts sometimes.

But I found that if you give your arm a hug, it tells the cells that they're okay and they feel loved and they start repairing faster.

And she went on to like explain, you know, different ways she does this.

Like, when I hold my finger, I cradle it like this, and then it starts to feel better.

And it's like this.

She's so cute.

Authentic, genuine yeah she's she's the best so that's very adorable yeah i managed to record it too so i i got a little reminder i sent it to my because i asked my dad's also having some wrist pain and she was like oh tell them to to hug his wrist it'll it'll heal his cells faster and so i sent that over to him i got like i'm hoping that i can i can uh you know

find some sort of cheat code or something being like hey guys hey cells you're doing great like keep it up keep the good work because we never why would no one ever talks to them, but they're us, dude.

They're us.

By the way, I'm not high right now.

I'm just saying, as I say this, I realize it probably sounds that way.

Yeah.

Sinking back to a past hypothetical Jesse.

Yeah.

Another Jay Cox, whoever that guy was.

A different guy.

What I'm saying is, no one ever says thank you.

And they're doing all the work.

You're actively working against them.

And so I'm just saying, you know, next time, thank yourselves.

Maybe that's why we kiss boo-boos.

Yeah, yeah, I think it's the same energy.

I appreciate that you do that early on in your life, and then when you get to the age of 92, like you come to appreciate your body again, you're like, you know what?

I'm still here because you guys are working really hard.

Thank you so much.

And you give yourself a little jet pat on the back.

Aww.

There's an anime called Cells at Work.

Yeah, I've seen that.

Where all of the different cells in your body be anthropomorphized as hot anime people.

Yeah.

Right.

No, I saw that before when it was called Osmosis Jones.

Oh my God.

Wait, gross movies.

Can I admit I was obsessed with that?

Really?

Wait, the movie or the show?

A movie.

Okay.

The one with

Bill Murray?

Yeah.

Gross Bill Murray up.

Bro, the scene when his pimple explodes and it lands on a lady's mouth.

So gross.

I would skip that part.

Wait, so you watch it over and over again, but you're like, this guy always skipped that part.

It's very similar to how my brother always skipped the ballroom ballroom scene of Labyrinth.

Because he thought that was gross, but for a totally different reason.

Because it was all romance.

And he didn't want cooties, you know?

Yeah.

Well, yeah, you can get those from Labyrinth.

Everyone knows.

You can.

Labyrinth spreads cooties.

It's one of the highest cooties spreads.

From the Masquerade, that's cootie central, dude.

Yeah, that's just with the Goblin King.

Oh, Goblin King, pure cooties.

Pure cootie.

He makes cooties.

Yeah.

What do they do in the masquerade?

They just dance, right?

They just

it's when she she oh is it before or after she goes to the the dump right and then she's and then she's like falling through the sky and then she no oh my gosh she gets put to sleep hoggle hoggle puts her to sleep

Hoggle betrays her and she goes to sleep and she has a weird like fever dream about dancing with the goblin king at a masquerade.

Oh, right.

Yeah.

Yeah, it was just a dream.

It didn't actually happen.

It was a dream.

But my brother hated it.

He was like, this slows down the whole fucking movie.

There's no way she would be yearning for the goblin.

He's the bad guy.

He's the bad guy.

Anyways, if anything, we have learned since that that's really who most people yearn for.

Shout out to the bad guy.

You're doing great.

Shout out to the Tumblr sexy men.

You just keep trekking, guys.

There is, it's not a Tumblr thing, but it's definitely in the same realm.

Over on Reddit, anytime anyone asks, where is this image from?

I'm trying to think of what the Reddit's called, but it's one of those ones where it's like, I don't either get the joke or I don't know what this image is.

And 99.9% of the time, it's just porn.

And I, I,

what's so, what's so funny is the comments are literally people being like, it's porn again.

Like, that's,

people are so fed up.

They're just like, we don't do anything else now except try to identify porn for you guys.

And honestly, it's just, this sucks.

Why are we doing this?

Over it.

Yeah.

It's one of my favorite Reddit things because people are just like,

that's so funny.

I've watched one thing that has me.

There was a video and people are like, what is this from?

And it is straight up a guy and a girl in a bedroom.

And the girl like pulls out a lightsaber.

And then he pulls out a lightsaber and they start fighting.

But then he like gives her a kiss while they're fighting.

And people are like, what is this from?

And they're like,

it's it's a porn it's a porn porn

I Need to know what goes on and then I'm like hold on hold on this porn went I have a good guess what goes on I I feel like I could probably fill you in on what goes on here

come out timeout hold on hold on yeah you might think oh are they dressed up like characters from Star Wars No, they're just like dudes in sweatpants and a tee like it's just people in t-shirts.

I was like so what is it's the first time I needed to understand the plot because I'm like, hold on.

Why are there active lightsabers?

Why are they battling?

Who are these people?

I have questions now.

Honestly, no answers.

I do think Star Wars could be improved if in every, you know, choreographed duel, there was a quick kiss and they go back to fighting.

And it's never, it never elaborates.

They never develop it into anything.

It's just a quick.

Huh.

It really changed the energy of the movie.

It's one of those kisses where it's like they both hate each other, but then one of them kisses them while they're battling, and then the other one's like, Hold up, you're trying to get my head, or do you mean that?

And then there's like a mental health.

Their foreheads touch, they're glaring at each other, and one of them just like kisses the other's nose.

Like, what the is that?

Yeah, like, what's that about?

Are you trying to get my head, or are we in love?

Yeah,

I could see that.

Do we need to DTR before we kill each other?

Like, what is this?

Yeah, except it's like, uh, you know, some guy like named Darth Murder.

And then a Jedi named like, you know,

Fist Manaru.

And then they both

have.

I'm not the direction I thought you were going to go with that.

No, I mean, that's their names.

That may have been the porn night.

They should be kissing.

Like, one kisses the other one.

You know.

Fist Manaroo.

Come on, man.

Fist Manaroo.

That's Fist Manaroo.

Oh, he's an incredible Jedi.

He is one of...

Yeah.

Kid Fisto is a real character, and that's pretty close

is a real character that's true so fist man a rude stop making everything dirty guys i'm so sorry you're right

anyway boy oh boy did you guys get a chance to do anything this week exciting or fun in the world of games or movies or books or life i guess maybe animals

animals animals well there's a lot of animals on the farm There are.

It's true.

I've heard that on a farm.

There are several animals.

Eated some hell divers a couple days ago.

Eat some hell divers.

How's the new update stuff?

I saw a video online got posted of what happens if Super Earth falls.

And I was like, oh.

Wait, what?

They like teased that?

No, some dude hacked files.

And even though it has no sound, it's a video that plays.

That's like, Super Earth has fallen.

And I was like, yo, what?

So.

So we have a scenario for that.

Yeah, I thought that was pretty cute.

I thought they would shut down the game if that happened.

I mean, how hardcore would that be if like just poof?

And it's like, we failed.

We failed as a team.

Or at least for like a month.

Like, you know, it becomes like, it becomes, it goes dark for a while and then they have to let it go.

Yeah, I don't know what happens if that, if that occurs.

You know what I mean?

Is it like, will we have to go retake it?

Or how do they, I have no, I have no clue.

But

have you played any of the new stuff?

I haven't played since they introduced the third faction that they were hyping up for a long time.

That was from the original third faction's full invasion.

And so they added a couple new trooper like types that show up, including this like strafing run ship, like squid ship that comes in and like fires directly in like a line in front of you.

And it has some of the most cinematic like moments where you have to dodge out of the way while shooting down this ship and it like spirals right over you and crashes.

It's like really cool stuff.

So that's been great.

I also went to a pirate themed birthday party last weekend.

So it was actually on an old pirate ship, like a recreation of a pirate ship.

Everyone was in costume.

That was like such a core moment for me because I love pirates.

And I got, there's like a historian on board too that got to like explain to everyone, like actually how things happened on the ship and like why things were the way they were.

And I had no, like, I knew it was like obviously romanticized, but by God, things were terrible for them.

Yeah.

That was so much worse than I had any idea of.

Like they had like kids reloading cannon, the cannons, because the deck was so short.

The only ones that could get in and out fast enough are like actual children.

So, yeah, it was terrible.

Very bad time to be alive.

What, um, pirate theme-wise, was it just everyone dress up like pirates and get on a pirate boat, or was it like, uh,

yar,

we must make ye pirate food and

shoot ye cannons at

vessels of

British monarchy, eh?

Like, what was going on?

Boy, that was a stretch.

What's going on?

Like, what'd you do, actually?

Well, it was mostly a party of drinking, but I would say as the night went on and more drinks were had, the pirate voices came out more.

So I think it got more to the latter of those two, especially for me.

I mean, maybe I'm just speaking from personal experience, but I definitely talked more like a pirate by the end of it than I was at the beginning.

Alcohol helps with that, I think.

Absolutely.

There was also...

It was kind of funny.

I took some pictures.

There was like in the bottom deck, like the cargo hold, it's like super authentic.

And then there's like a happy birthday with like party city, like you know, string on the top of the deck.

And there's like a little like star, you know, uh, tablecloth with like chips and,

you know, like biscuits on it.

And it just was so out of place.

So it was a lovely kind of mixture of like, you know, tongue-in-cheek, like, hey, happy birthday, but also like authentic

everything around.

I, somewhere in my mind, all I can hear is a bunch of, like, like, and see the cast of Pirates of of the Caribbean and them just be like, I,

we shall help ourselves to this bounty of nachos.

There were, okay,

sprite mate.

Okay.

There's uh,

there was like a whole time in in like advertising, I feel like, where there were so many ads that were just like authentic pirate or something be like, you'd be wanting some of my lucky charge, team 80.

And it's like, oh, I missed that time.

Like, the authentic like smoke and like backlighting on like the actor pulling up this like, you know, like cereal box and everything.

Yeah.

So dramatic.

Yeah.

I'm trying to remember.

There was a whole series of ads.

I think it might have been Fruit Loops.

Someone was trying to get someone cereal and it definitely was a pirate.

Oh.

But I think it came out around the same time as Hook.

Oh.

When that was like a whole craze, like everyone was like, Pirates are a great movie.

Yeah, that is a great movie.

Yeah.

Pirates were always cool.

I mean, except for when they really were.

Except for when they were real.

Very true.

I learned that.

Yeah.

You learned that from the guy.

Yeah.

So quick example.

You know, like in Sea of Thieves, when you're like turning up the

anchor where it's dropped, it takes like seven seconds if you have three people on the turning thing.

And like maybe like 12 seconds if you have one.

In real life, it took three people two two and a half hours to get the anchor up from the bottom of the sea floor, and they had this thing like sea shanties started from trying to keep everyone in rhythm while they're carrying this wheel around.

Bring up the anchor?

That's crazy.

It's just everything was so much longer and boring, like more laborious.

I mean, what else are you gonna do, though?

Like, for real, you're a pirate.

What else you got?

What else you got going on?

Honestly, I'd rather be that guy than the guy who has to like scrub the deck.

Like, that's a that's a crap job.

I don't want to be the deck scrub.

I'd much rather scrub the deck than just walk in a circle for two hours

Pushing a thing?

Yeah, no, thank you.

You blow out

the scrum on the deck, but if you're pushing you that's you got your upper body strength working plus it's probably a better position and you get better gruel and or rum

Now I also couldn't stand up to my height within that place with the push the push thing it was like I had to be hunched over so the entire time you're like this through everything it was well that's why my pirate crew the right right size for it, then.

Yeah, my pirate crew would be five feet and under

little

kids.

Oh,

yeah,

yeah, I'd have a whole pirate crew of children.

And so, like, can you imagine you're out, you're sailing the seas, and you're, you know, like a Spanish guy, and you got a bunch of, I don't know, gold, and you're sailing, and life is good.

And then you hear, like, a fast matey,

we're gonna come take you, booty, and then a bunch bunch of kids swing over.

Holy crap, you wouldn't know what to do.

You'd be dead before you'd be dead before you figured out.

You don't want to shoot them.

They're a kid.

And then they'll stab you in the gut.

Yeah.

Oh, they're all, yeah, they're my little.

I call them my bastards.

I'm like,

I'm like, ye bastards.

Right?

And then they're like, show a thing.

Oh, yeah.

They call me.

They call me Captain Papa.

Like, Captain Papa.

I'm like,

come on, children.

Let's go rob these fools.

I like that you're basically just the pirate version version of Fagin from Robert Wist.

I don't know what you mean.

I don't know what you mean by this.

You mean take care of children and

give them purpose?

Yeah, give them, yeah, yeah.

Help them when no one else would.

Steal them from the loving arms of a nice warm bed and could save them from a life of mediocrity, I think you mean.

Oh,

teach them trade skills.

Yeah, yeah.

They'll know how to walk in a circle, pull up anchors.

That's useful.

It takes two hours to do that, I've heard.

So having like a bunch of those little bastards doing it, oh, yeah, probably three half of its kids.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

You can fit more in there because they're smaller, so it'll be faster.

Oh, yeah, more

like.

Yeah, plus my crew will be huge because, you know, for each grown adult, you need so much space, but two kids, you can cram them in one space.

so my crew well everyone else got like 20 30 guys i got like 60 70 and they just

yeah yeah yeah and i won't have to have all the rum because they're children

yeah they can't drink right right it's all for me yeah yeah but then what i'd do is i'd fill the rum barrels with no wait a minute coal coal mining kids got to drink beer

Yeah, well, that's

a coal mining.

No, because coal mine is a coal mine that's crazy.

You got to be drunk to go in there.

Yeah, no, I get that.

The sea, though, I don't want them drunk because they'll be trying to like sleep with manatees or whatever the hell pirates did.

What the hell are you talking about?

You know, kid, the drunk kids are going to try to sleep with manatees.

Puberty is a hell of a thing.

You know what?

Just let him keep talking.

Yeah, just let him keep talking.

He can dig the hole and we'll just sit here.

What?

I'm just saying.

Eventually, I got, you know, we got to phase them out.

When they hit like 11, here's my pirate children, 8 to 11.

That's it.

Once we hit 11, I gotta, I gotta, it's, I gotta battle puberty.

No, we're, you walk the plank.

Sharks can have you.

But we don't tell anyone that.

We just say they're a bad kids.

Yeah, they're conveniently not looking when they

just chuck them overboard in the middle of the night.

Yeah.

Yeah.

They're children.

What are they gonna do?

Fight back?

Come on.

I'm so much bigger.

I just toss them over.

You literally have trained, what was it, 67?

67 children to just gut slice anybody?

No, but it's the shock factor.

It's the shock factor, though.

See, I'm playing mind games, but the children, they respect me.

So when I approach them and I'm like, I child, come with me to the edge of the ship.

I have to talk to you about your future.

And they'll be like, yes, Papa.

Yeah.

Yes, Captain Papa.

I'm ready.

And I'll just boop right in the ocean and then we'll just keep going.

And I'll be like, I don't know where you went.

Could be that when you're 11, you're taken.

by Davey Jones to be part of his crew.

And everyone will be like, wow, Captain Papa.

Does that mean you're 11, Cap and Papa?

Permanently 11 years old, children.

All right, this is literally the plot of Peter Pan.

You guys are best to see what we agree on Peter Pan.

Yeah, really have no new ideas.

I'm just over here stealing from literature.

But if it works there, it should work for me.

It does work there.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Anything else happen with you two goobers this week?

Oh my goodness.

I played a game.

I want to make sure that I have this the subtitle right, but Sam and I played it just yesterday.

It's called Linked Banner of the Spark.

And it was so fun.

We were sponsored.

Full disclosure, I'm biased.

They paid me.

But

you can play it by yourself or you can play it co-op, but it kind of tackles the same sort of thing that Cult of the Lamb does, where it's a balance of you go out on missions, but you have a home base that's more like,

you know, you're trying to like build an area, a home, a hub for people to live in.

The setting is an AI has taken over the world and is trying to assimilate everybody and everything that it can.

You're one of like the few humans that's left that hasn't been killed.

And you're trying to rescue bots that haven't been assimilated into this evil AI yet and give them like a place, like a hub where they can sort of rebuild and help fight back.

It's really fun.

It's actually like super cute.

I love all of the little robot characters.

When you go out on missions, yeah, you can either just go by yourself and then bring like some of the robots that you've saved with you.

All of the robots that don't have like set jobs in the town will have their own fighting styles.

And so you can like choose who you'd like to bring and it like improves your relationship with them and thus their fighting style improves and things.

And yeah, and once you're like in a mission, the combat actually feels really nice.

It's a little bit dungeon crawly, roguelike-y, where you start with a weapon.

They give you like the basic version of all of the possible weapons.

So, you choose which one you want to go in with at the start.

And then, as you like, open chests, you can find better and better weapons.

You get to upgrade your weapon in a variety of ways at the end of each like stage of the dungeon, so to speak.

And at the end, you either get items or you find robots that need to be saved or whatever.

Side mission, everything.

But we had a blast.

We had a really good time with this game.

Yeah, it was nice to see a game that did something similar to what Cult of the Lamb was.

I was going to say, that's like the Cult of the Lamb vibe.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

You come back to

nobody's shitting everywhere.

Bonus.

Big.

Yeah, they're robots.

Yeah.

No one's pooping.

You go on a mission, they're fine.

No one's died.

No one's pooped.

It's great.

You just come back and everything's fine.

So if you hated that part of Cult of the Lamb, have I got news for you?

No poops.

No poops, dude.

Zero poops.

Yeah, and you get to make your little character at the start.

And it's, you know, one of the robots that you save pretty early on is like a tailor.

And you could get like...

cute clothes and whatever, you know, like it's fun.

It's cute.

I liked it a lot.

Speaking of, if you haven't gone back recently and played some of the updates to Call to the Lamb, they added so much stuff.

Like, a lot of different things have been added to it that kind of change up how the game plays.

So, just give them a little shout out as well.

I haven't played it since they added the goat, since they added the co-op.

You did the co-op, didn't you, Jesse?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Um, I played co-op

locally on PlayStation, so

I don't know how it handles through online or when we each have it on our own screen.

But one of the things that I think I didn't like about the co-op version is if you and I are doing something, let's say I'm harvesting wood, right?

But then you want to go make food.

You go to the food screen, you take over the full screen, you operate everything, and then when it comes back to the normal overview map, I'm not harvesting wood anymore.

I have stopped.

So it's like players override each other.

when you're doing it in co-op locally.

I have no idea if that's the case, if it's too different.

things.

I assume it wouldn't be.

I assume it would be more like don't starve.

No.

Or, you know, something where you just only see yourself.

But other than that,

it is very fun.

Like, once you get out of this, the town, I'm about to call it a city, but it's clearly the town.

Once you leave the cult and you go out into the world and you run around, it plays like any other game that would have two players beaten up crap.

It's fun.

It's good stuff.

They added all sorts of.

There's like a tailor.

You can get corrupt now because of the update where like you can your animals can bang.

Yeah, there's a lot of stuff in there.

And

also a lot more achievements, which I will never playing it on console was a bad, bad call.

Playing games on Steam, I'm not worried about achievements.

I don't care.

The minute I touch a console, suddenly I'm like, oh, God, it's right there.

All I have to do is defeat every boss without getting hit.

I could do that.

No, I can't.

No, I can't.

That's a lie.

Why even try?

Yeah.

never gonna happen so that kind of stuff but there's a lot of cool stuff there so uh if you haven't picked that up in a while you can do that as well

anything else in the world of uh crike and dugues

what else did i play dude oh i finally did um mr rabbit's magic show i wasn't expecting it to be rusty lake little to the left

okay sure sure yeah yeah that's sort of that's sort of how it it felt

yeah i can't remember exactly what you've said about this game, Jesse.

I don't think I said much because I didn't want to spoil it for you.

Yeah, it's the newest Rusty Lake game, and it came with a little video, like previous ones have.

It's an anniversary game and video.

So

the actual Mr.

Rabbit's Magic show,

the longer that it went on, I was like, this feels so much like...

like a weird version of A Little to the Left, which for anybody who hasn't played A little to the Left is kind of like a, here's a screen with something, you know, like a bunch of cards.

What should you do with the cards to move on?

And you go, okay, I guess I'll put them in order.

And it goes ding, and then moves you on to the next like thing to do, right?

Right.

So, yeah, when I was playing the beginning of the game, I was like, oh,

feels like I'm playing a little to the left, but with really weird characters.

And then it's, and then it switches up.

It becomes rusty lately.

Very quickly.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But it's very clearly a like game made for fun for the anniversary.

And it really is more of a promotional tool for

Rusty Lake as a, as a, like a concept.

Because it's like, hey, the secret, usually there's secret stuff in these games.

And the secret this time was literally just a trailer for the next real Rusty Lake game.

And I was like, okay, all right, I'm excited.

I'm new to this franchise.

What is Rusty?

What is he like?

Have you never played any of the Rusty Lake games?

My gosh, I think you really like them.

They're all pretty short.

They all take place in the same universe and are connected.

And they're just really strange point-and-click puzzle games.

Oh, okay.

For the most part, they all stem from these Cube Escape games that were mobile games.

I don't remember if they were free on mobile devices, but they were definitely free when they came out on PC for Newgrounds originally, weren't they?

Maybe.

Again, it feels very

vibe to it.

But

the first games I ever played were like Pajama Sam, Freddy Fish, like, you know, Spy Fox, like the point-and-click humongous entertainment games.

They feel very Flash game.

Okay.

And yeah, they're like escape room games.

The original ones are just like,

you're in this situation.

What do you need to do?

And you just click on everything and figure out like what it wants you to do.

But specifically, the Rusty Lake games are very like

strange, whimsical, like, uh,

and strange.

Yeah, it's like the, the characters and the way they talk and the way that things are drawn feels very like, it's meant to make you feel kind of off kilter, you know?

But it's, they're so fun.

They're really cool.

Yeah.

To give you an example, like the first, the very first game, which almost feels like like

what were they thinking?

What is this premise?

How does this work?

But the very very first one that was a Rusty Lake game was Rusty Lake Hotel.

And the premise is this, it's simple.

You're a person who goes to the hotel and you meet all the guests, which are animals, but people, but they're animals.

And every night you go to one of their rooms and you kind of escape room the room, but really your objective is to kill the animal and serve them as food to all the other guests.

So in each room, you have to find different things to make the food taste better.

So, like in one room, it's like, okay, well, I need to get, you know, this ingredient and this ingredient to serve best with quail.

And then you go to the chef and he's like, all right.

And then the next scene is everyone's eating the guest.

And it's like, what the hell is this game?

This is so weird.

And from that point on, none of the other games have animal people.

However, they do have animal masks.

And it makes you wonder very quickly what the hell was going on in the first game.

And it's that kind of thing.

Are those actually people or yeah, yeah, yeah.

And so, from that point on, it just gets crazier and crazier to the point where there's

a movie they made

that.

If you want the Rusty Lake experience without playing Rusty Lake and you just want to know what it's like, go look up.

Oh man, I can't remember the name.

It's Rusty Lake

something.

It's on YouTube, and it's like a 10, 20-minute video that is

amazing.

It not only is lynching as hell, but it also

And it has

hints.

So a game came out, Rusty-Lake Paradox.

And in that, if you watch the video, there were clues on how to solve the game.

They also have, I think the game The White Room had a whole website thing where you had to ARG in order.

It's so much fun.

It's just like rabbit hole after rabbit hole.

And it clearly means something.

And there is an overarching story.

And you can, it's like,

I don't know, like centuries long.

And it's fascinating.

But each game is out of order.

It adds new things, and then you just have to be like, okay, so that person was that

person.

It's massive.

It's, I love it to death.

Cool.

Yeah.

I definitely don't know.

You love them.

I think.

I think they're going to be on brand for that.

Is it live action?

Is it like a

like name?

The movies are.

Okay.

The videos that they make are live action, but the actual games are like this really strange art style.

Yeah.

And it has a quality vibe to it that again feels very not like modern Newgrounds.

I think a lot of modern Newgrounds tries to be like, we're very like good at this.

It has the vibe of 2008 Newgrounds, where

people were just, you know, like the voices are kind of like,

I've got to get out of here.

Like that.

And it's, you, any, in any other setting, you'd be like, that's kind of jank.

For some reason, because it's so weird and so disturbing, not disturbing, like, oh, it's so gross.

Or like, but like disturbing is in it feels weird, like inside when you play you're like what is what is happening right now that's the kind of vibe it has that flash game aesthetic and i love it i love it

cool yeah we'll definitely give it a shot yeah before so last week i also tried the alters um

which i can talk about if you guys are interested

i uh have played a bunch of it i love it

did you play the uh the demo I played.

I only played the demo.

Yeah, I played the demo and I played some of the

other stuff they had.

And so I'm very excited to see, you know, I got to talk with Alex Jordan about doing all of the voices, you know, like that kind of stuff.

I was like, that's pretty neat.

I realized he's much better at American than I am at British.

And that, that hurt me a little bit.

British people tend to be better at doing American accents than vice versa.

He can do so many American accents, like a large number of American.

And that's kind of the point of the game.

Is this just him flexing his American?

And I'm like, how dare you?

How dare you.

Yeah.

I got to talk to with him too and it was fun to spend the weekend with him because well first of all he loves he loves the party so every time we were at like a party he was drinking and share like he was so happy to share all these anecdotes and histories and he kept asking us which of the uh the altars would we like our our our list he's like

no right like the one you'd want to sleep with the most and he was very insistent on getting that answer from everybody which is crazy because they're all him he's like which one of my personalities are you the most actually

But yeah, he was, he was great.

And it's true, like, because I got to play quite a bit and

hearing all the different variations of the, you know, alternate character, they all have so different like methods of speaking.

And you can, it really feels like you're talking to a different person, but they all stem and look like the same,

you know, protagonist.

And yeah, it's such an original concept for a game.

So I'm really excited for that.

I'm excited to see where a game goes.

Like,

because the walking around on the map bit is fascinating to me because I love how weird everything seems and there's definitely a mystery there.

And I like the bit of when you make a new version of you, the idea of who's the real one and having to tell someone they're a clone and the conversation.

I love that bit.

The part that I'm like, okay, I'm not like a big builder guy.

I never have been, never will be.

And so I'm, I'm hoping I won't have to spend a lot of time like figuring out where to place the different,

you know, because you can move them around and I don't want to spend my entire game micromanaging the way my actual like ship management.

Yes, yes, yes, yes.

I want to spend my time in their heads and on the ground.

Like, what's that?

What's that thing?

And so I'm curious what the balance between that all is because based on what I've played, they've really balanced it out.

But again, that's demo stuff and they have control over it versus like, you know, if you were to play an early version like Dodger was talking about earlier with Call to the Lamb, every version I played of that was not about poop.

And then when I played the game, I was like, all I'm doing is pooping.

It's just poop.

Everything's poop.

Yeah.

No, I think that's a, that's a fair question.

From when I played, as you get more of them, because you could keep printing more alters as you get further in the game, each one of them you can assign to different tasks.

And as you get more of them, the needs of all of them kind of increase as well because you need to feed more of them.

You need to like manage their, you know, they'll have moments where it's like one of them is like, I think we should get better food and the other one's like that's inefficient we should have gruel every day and it's like you have to be like uh you got to pick one or the other right and whichever one you pick the other one's gonna get pissed so you know you have to like manage these the tension between all of these different characters

people pleasers yeah it's gonna be

it's gonna be challenging i think i think there's like there's a line to walk though when it comes to the characters because you can pick kind of who you want on the ship a little bit.

Right.

And

in each playthrough, you can't have all of of them.

You have to, right?

You have to pick some of them.

So you can kind of balance out who would interact with who.

And maybe,

yeah, you need an engineer, but that engineer is going to be a total asshole when it comes to X, Y, and Z.

So maybe you don't want him on this version of your game.

I don't know.

There's a lot of options.

And so I love that kind of thing, but I also dread it because it means there's an option for complete failure, which I will find.

Oh, I found a couple.

There's two different scenarios I found.

One, if an altar of yours gets injured enough, they can die.

And if some of them die, they're just out.

And you have to have a little funeral for them.

Everyone's like, man, this could have been avoided if someone was better at the game.

Like, they're all pointing at you.

They're like, you're doing a bad job.

My bad guys.

And then you just go and print another one.

And you're like, all right, this is a different guy.

But there's also a fail state where

if they're like really upset, they will go on a murder suicide spree.

And one of your altars will wipe the whole crew and then you.

And it's a game over.

And you have to like reload and find a way to get the mood up.

I guess that makes sense that that can happen.

Yeah, it was very jarring.

It was just like, oh, I guess like that guy was really bummed about the gruel thing.

I guess he killed us all.

How Mickey 17 is that game?

Yeah, it's, I mean, I think this is exploring the concept that was introduced or that people saw in Mickey 17.

Obviously, this was in the works a lot longer, you know, perpendicular to Mickey 17, so none of them came first, really.

But I think this explores the concept of what it is to be a clone in a bit more of a personal way by making them an alternate version of you that you can actually trace how they're different based on their life trajectory.

Right.

And that it's pretty jarring.

There's like some of the characters that are like,

they get printed and they're immediately like, all right, I understand what I am.

I'm ready to get to work.

And another one that's like, holy hell, why am I here?

Like, put me back, put me back.

You know,

it's a really cool question on like identity and all these big philosophical questions, I think, that they handle pretty well.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I would be curious to know, because Mickey 17 is based off of a novella called Mickey 7, I believe.

And, you know, novellas are short.

So I think we were talking before about how Mickey 17,

yeah, didn't explore.

that concept as much as expected, but maybe that's because the novella was, you know, not a full-length film sort of a thing.

But potentially

somebody read Mickey 7 and was like, wait, I can do this better, you know, or like I can get it.

A game gives you more time.

Yeah, you can really get in the nitty-gritty.

Like if you play the demo, which both of you have, the whole idea of going through the timeline, you're not reliving the life.

You're literally at the base DNA level being like, in this person's story, they stood up to their father.

And then that one change causes a snowball.

Now, obviously, I don't know how, you know, it's a video game.

I don't know how that concept would work in real life because I've like, I don't, they didn't actually live that.

But I guess if it's a memory you can implant, that's a whole other game, which is awesome.

But

yeah, just the idea of

surviving on the planet.

And there's some sort of weird thing.

Like, look, look, I'm.

I don't want to cockster domestic again.

Right.

But

when you get on that, I just, you know, just based off of the maybe hour and a half I've played, I'm not saying that if you look at all the art, no one has the number one.

And I'm not saying that there's dead bodies already on the planet.

And I'm not saying this is like you've definitely done this before and this is just another retreading on this thing.

I'm not saying that.

But when that turns out to be true,

and I've absolutely nailed that this is like actually the main guy is already a clone.

Uh-huh.

Come back to me.

Let me know I was absolutely correct and make my ego feel.

Yeah,

there's definitely a lot of questions that I had as well in that same vein.

They leave a lot, you know, up to interpretation and kind of ambiguous that definitely seems like it'll get tackled later as you and your alters gain more like of a, you know, rapport and a better sense of like where they are in this world.

They also deal with like alternate realities in a really interesting way, where I won't give away like which ones or anything, but one of your altars has a moment where

in their lifespan, they invented something or there was an invention that became possible based on something that they did earlier in their life.

As in, they were, you know, a professor and they taught a student, which then invented a certain technology.

And in your reality, because your character was never a professor, that student never learned that, therefore, didn't have the same job trajectory.

Therefore, this technology doesn't exist.

And it becomes a, oh no, you know, he's like assuming that we can beat this puzzle because he, there's, this technology exists, but in your reality, it doesn't.

And it's like, I see, these kind of hypothetical

butterfly effect.

Yeah, they play with that kind of, you know, concept a lot.

There's another, like, a more personal one where one of your characters is still married to the, your ex-wife.

And she's, he's like, I miss my wife.

I miss my wife.

And the entire time he's like, I got to get back to her.

And it's like, well, in this reality, your wife is my ex-wife so it's like this really awkward like how do we handle this yeah and and yeah you can imagine how that's hard to manage when you're trying to keep everyone alive on yeah i mean it's little things too like um

just associating with the characters like maybe four of your alters love the same beer as you and you can talk about that But there's the one guy who had a different life path.

He's like, I only do wine on beers for suckers.

And you're like, son of a bitch.

And it's just, it is what it is.

you have to learn about yourself again which is fascinating yeah there's a part that goes on about like music taste and that that's interesting right imagining like how the taste of you know maybe you all started with like the same band you liked but then based on your life trajectory they wildly change and they have like arguments over like you know because music is so like injected into culture isn't it yeah whatever however your life progresses you get exposed to different things yeah

that's i mean yeah it's a cool concept it looks very cool Again, like we were talking about last week with Firebreak.

Like conceptually,

huge fan, ready to see it.

When it releases, how many, like, I don't want to say like, what legs will it have, but you know, like, how long can the concept that I'm interested in keep me playing?

Is I think

my big thing with alters is I'm like, yo, this looks cool as hell, but will the micromanaging make me lose my mind?

I don't know.

I have no clue.

I'll find out.

This is a cult of the lamb situation for you.

Yeah.

You're like, I'm really, I'm really interested in this part of the gameplay, but this other part of the gameplay that's definitely important, I might get fed up with.

And I will absolutely die on every hill of that.

Like a great example is Pacific Drive.

Conceptually, that game is right up my alley.

I love everything about it.

Gameplay-wise, it was fix your car simulator.

And I was like, I hate this.

I hate fixing.

I don't care about fixing my car.

I want to go explore the woods.

There's weird shit out there.

No, I got to fix my car.

And I'm like, oh my God, I hate that.

I just want to do the thing that was promised to me.

I don't want to spend all my time like, well, I got to shield up the car because things are going to attack it.

Like, yeah, well,

I just want to see what those things were because this was going to be a weird experience of driving through the woods and it was going to be creepy.

And it's like,

sorry, build your thing.

I don't know.

I just want to be weirded out.

I don't want to.

I'm not a big,

like Sam.

I'm not a big, let's build a town and then make our own fun guy i'm like no game you make fun for me we don't make fun you make fun you show me fun yeah

that's what i paid for you show me fun

we shall see i played a fun little game that i think is very dodger coded and it is yes gonna be

released later this year fingers crossed i think it's called malice uh it is by summerfall the the team that did Stray Gods, and David Gator from Dragon Age Origins fame.

Basically, it is a game that is imagine you're playing Constantine, Constantine.

You're a priest, and you are going around exercising demons.

And it's a card game where you get various cards that are like compel and you know,

exercise, and all that.

You know, and the way it works is it's a rogue light-ish, roguelike, where you are moving similarly, you know, how in call to the lamb, you'd go from like little circle to little circle to little circle.

Yeah, same vibe, except you're in a city.

Yes, yes, yes.

And you move between story beats.

So it's like you've returned to the city, an angel approaches you and is like, hey, man, we need your help with this thing.

There's this demon.

We got it.

And you're like, all right, angel, sure.

And the angel's like, all right, peace, dude.

And you go off on this adventure that is very

like the idea is both dark and yet super cool.

The demons are kind of like

metaphors-ish.

So a great example is the very first thing I played was, okay,

you approach this, like you're at a bar and the bartender.

is behind the bar and he's looking weird and he's polishing the same cup over and over and over again.

And as you're at the bar, everyone everyone around you starts to freeze.

And the bartender's eyes are white all of a sudden.

And you're like, oh, damn, he's possessed.

And so you have to go battle the bartender.

But what you're really doing is in phase one of the battle of the card battle is you have to discover the demon's name.

And so there's a bunch of sigils and you have to do enough damage to the demon in the four turns you have, at least in this version of the game, four turns you have before he like activates.

And so once you discover the demon's name, the next phase happens.

And this time you're finding the demon.

And in this case, it was like

this weird headless thing that, like, its head was dangling down from its neck, like, and it's creepy looking.

And so you have to defeat the demon.

Well, once you defeat the demon, the next stage occurs, which is the demon now is sucking the life force from the person that it's possessing.

So you have to both keep the person alive and kill the demon.

And if you fail to keep the person alive, That's probably not good.

So you have to, you have to do this like pretty fun battle mechanic.

And then when you're done doing the card battle, you get another card, obviously, and then you continue on.

The next one I did was like, you're at a hotel and something's weird.

You hear like scratching.

You're like, what the hell?

And you look around.

You can't find anything, but you know there's a demon here.

And it sounds like, oh, it's coming from the bed.

So you pull back the mattress, but there's nothing under it.

And you're like, hmm, okay.

So you rip open the wood.

paneling of the bed and there's like a person in there starving to death.

And they're like, please help me.

And the demon's like, no, bitch.

And so you have to fight the demon.

It's that kind of thing.

And so each

story that you discover as you go through it is like, you know, very well-written horror.

And then you card game over the horror.

And there's three phases.

And the screen and the mute, like as you play and it gets more intense, the music starts to get crazy.

The VO, the dialogue, they're just like screaming like.

like trying like, get out of there, fucking demon.

Like there's, it's awesome.

It's so cool.

I have no idea what

yeah.

I don't know what the full game loop is, but I know there's a, a loop in that whatever the demon is, that's like the big bad.

Clearly, if you die, you start over.

So there's some sort of time loop involved and a meta-progression of every time you play through it, be it, you know, you meet, there's a homeless woman you can meet.

The art's super cool.

Yeah.

There's a, there's a homeless woman you can meet, and she'll be like, oh, hey, will you go get me some bread?

And I thought this is a really funny scene because you go to the store and you see there's only one loaf of bread, and it's kind of moldy, and you're like, I'll get her canned food instead.

And you come back out, you bring her food, and she's like, I wanted the bread, and you're like, Fine.

So, you go back in, you get her the bread, and then she's like, Because she's like, I need to feed my children.

You're like, Okay, so you bring her the bread, and she's like, Okay, she opens it up, and you're like, Are you sure your kids can eat that?

She's like, My kids can eat anything, and then she starts feeding pigeons, and you're like,

Okay, cool.

But by interacting with her, if you keep interacting with her over and over and over again in the loops she'll eventually start giving you cards and stuff and then you can you know you can meet different characters that will buff you you can meet a priest and then what will happen is the priest will give you his card which means in combat you can summon the priest so whenever you attack the priest will do an extra damage for you And I'm like, that's fun.

So there's definitely a lot going on, but it's very clearly still in, at least the build I played, which was like alpha.

There's a lot of stuff that was just tooltips or things that had no tooltips.

And I was was like, what does this do?

And so there's that kind of, but you can also, you know, get weird buffs.

Like you can have Wrath, which will make your damage higher, but you can also accidentally cast Wrath.

I'm not sure how I know this.

I wouldn't have done this.

You can accidentally put Wrath on an enemy and then they have it.

So now they attack you for more.

And that probably wasn't smart.

But whoever did that would have been a fool to have done that.

Yeah, very cool stuff.

Excited to see the final product whenever it eventually comes out later this year at some point.

It's been a good year for games already.

It's been so

good.

I'm kind of really relieved that Greta thought it was delayed a year because I don't know how I'm going to have time to play that with everything else that's going on.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I also have spent...

I'm not sure exactly what I can say, so I won't get too specifics, but

I will say...

that I have some Magic of the Gathering cards of a Final Fantasy nature.

Did you open them?

Oh, yeah.

I'm no fool.

I opened a bunch.

We made a video to put out on the 30th, I guess, is when people can actually start talking about the cards that aren't released yet.

There's a whole bunch of cards that already exist that people can look at, but there's so many that are not released.

I must stress this: to everyone who thinks the cards they've shown already are the majority of the cards, false.

There are so many cards that just.

This is all I'll say.

I'm not, I haven't played magic in a serious way in decades it the last time i like played played was back when i was in high school so that's like you know we're talking 20 plus years uh but with that said

absolutely

love the new final fantasy collection i'm like i'm collecting all these this is just happening the art rocks it's so good Some of the art is some of the best they've ever done.

And I don't know who the teams are that have been assigned to do the art, but whoever picked who does what or whoever was in charge of deciding what teams or what artists worked on what clearly understood the assignment because every game specific related art piece has like little Easter eggs in it or little things that fans would be like

There's so much cool stuff.

And then just the flavor text.

I'm sure people have seen the Nero artwork that exists.

Or, sorry, not Nero, Xenos.

Different, different Imperial Venice board.

But like, they made a commander card for Xenos.

And literally, it's the perfect version of that character where he essentially,

you pick a person, and when that person loses, you win.

Perfect.

And it's great.

Yeah.

It's just like his whole purpose is he found his friend and his whole goal is to kill that person.

And if he does, you win.

That's it.

And I was like, that's so funny.

That is absolutely perfect.

They have so many beautiful cards.

The art is amazing.

I will say the funniest thing I saw, though, and I said this,

I realized that I have,

I don't know if I have the mind of a pervert, but the heart of a saint, or the heart of a pervert, and the mind of a saint.

Either way, I just don't know.

So while going through the cards, I discovered a Lulu card.

Final Fantasy X, Mother of Belts, big fan.

But in my mind, just the way I remember her as a character,

all the cleavage, all the time, it's just permanently seared up here for reasons, you know, a young man will never forget.

And it's just up here.

So when I looked at the cards while I'm opening the cards, I see a Lulu card and I'm like, this art is amazing.

However, they made her little puffy chest thing huge.

There's not an ounce of of boobage to be seen.

And I made a joke about it.

I was like, well, obviously not my Lulu.

And I, you know, like, that was the joke.

Oh, no.

I go to the internet.

Some dude has posted on Reddit, like, look what they did to my girl.

This is trash.

So instead, I made a hundred some magic cards online, but they're dirty cards.

And I was like, ah, internet.

You fools.

So that's, that's, I just, for some reason, I knew it was going to happen.

And here we are.

Yeah.

Guy was like, I made better versions of these cards.

Lulu's half naked in this one.

And I'm like,

okay.

All right.

Sure.

It's like the Lola Bunny.

I guess the Lola Bunny like video.

Lola Bunny.

I love that so much.

But I will say that good luck to everyone who wants to collect those cards.

Just.

They are so expensive already.

They're so expensive.

They're almost all sold out, if not sold out.

And the vast majority of the cards that I've gone through, it reminded me of why magic was such a costly thing back in the day.

It's like, well, not only is there the normal version, there's the wide art version, there's the full card version, there's the foil version, there's the like Ripley, whatever foil version.

There's like, I'm just like, come on now.

I can't.

What do you expect?

I can't do this.

Yeah, surge foil.

That's the one.

There's surge foil.

And then there's

also chocobos.

And there's one that's like the super ultra mega rare.

Only 77 gold chocobos produced.

Wow.

Right.

So that's the one that's going to be.

Rarity.

Yeah.

I'm curious to see what the, like, obviously these aren't like I'm doing it for a value thing.

This is, I like these cards and I want.

I want more.

Yeah, there's 16 different SIDs.

There are, of course.

You know that the Final Fantasy VII date scene?

There's a version of that for each potential date.

So there's like,

there's a Cloud and Tifa version.

It's the same card, but the art's different.

There's a Cloud and Tifa, a Cloud and Yuffie, a Cloud and Barrett.

Yeah, so there's one of every SID from every single game.

But it's the same SID card.

It's just there's one version.

Yeah.

It's...

It's insane to me, but also

I get what they're doing.

I mean, some of the cards, man, they're cool.

And so

I'm definitely interested to see what I get.

I have a whole bunch of stuff I haven't opened yet.

If you want to see the madness, that right there is me trying to put stuff in a folder.

And I have all these cards just sitting there.

And I'm like, the folder's not big enough.

I don't have room.

That thing holds 900.

And it's like...

With the different versions.

Y'all, I screwed up.

This was a fool's errand.

I don't know what I was thinking.

I'm too, I'm in too deep.

And the worst part is, I bought a bunch of cards, and then they were like, hey, do you want us to send you cards?

And I was like, hell yeah.

Now

I have too many cards.

I'm in too deep.

The amount of...

I think I can say this because they already existed, but like, there's a token card.

It's this, it's this one token card.

And it's like a bird.

It's just a chocobo image, but it says bird.

I might have 82,000 of those cards.

It's ludicrous, the amount of those.

Just wild.

But

yeah, I'm going to, whenever I'm allowed to, I'll start doing pack openings on stream because they have so many packs.

And I'm no fool.

I watched Quendor open all sorts of packs on stream.

That's the winner.

Do you got to do it all on stream?

That's so.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I've never learned how to play magic yet, but everyone in my life.

is obsessed with it now and have been slowly encroaching and convincing me.

And so, Jesse, I don't know if you're you're going to Summer Games Fest

this year, but so they have

a booth there and they invited me and a bunch of other people, but I got an invite to meet their team and they have a specific session for people that don't know how to play magic where they're going to teach you.

And so I'm like, if I'm going to learn, I might as well go and learn from like the team itself.

So I might try that.

I might finally take the plunge, but we'll see.

Shout out to my man, Jeff, who I meet every year at Games Fest.

He is my dude.

Every year we sit down and we play the new magic thing.

Like last time it was Assassin's Creed, I think.

And the time before that was Lord of the Rings.

And we just sit down and play.

It's so much fun.

I understand what I'm doing.

He understands.

And we just sit there and like shoot the shit.

And I'm sure it's one of those like, yeah,

let's have a conversation about this.

But

this time I'm curious just because it's all Final Fantasy stuff.

I really want to see what they're...

promoting as like, this is how you should play.

Because each deck, each build has its own vibe, right?

Like when Assassin's Creed was a thing the two decks they had to play was one was you played as Ezio and everything was this free running mechanic which was basically you can keep playing cards over and over again the idea of like you're running and jumping and stabbing right yeah then the other deck was I think

Evor and it was all uh items and weapons And I was like, okay, interesting.

So that's why you're playing against each other.

A great example is the Lord of the Rings one.

It was

the

good guy card set was all about like, we have to get the the sword of Isildor and that kind of stuff.

And then when he played as the orcs, it was just, I got 50 orcs and I'm sending them all at you.

And I kind of liked being the guy who was just spamming.

And so this,

because

it's, it's so many different Final Fantasies.

So a great example is like, I'm trying to figure out what the decks are.

They give you some that are, okay, here's the squald, or I'm sorry, the cloud deck and the Sephiroth deck, or here's the Terra deck, here's the Una deck, right?

But there's so many other cards.

This is just an estimate based on

me trying to figure this out, but it feels like the games that are popular got the most cards, you know what I mean?

And so there's some games where it's like, we got like seven cards.

Now, obviously, I haven't found them all, but I'm curious how you build.

Like the Final Fantasy XIV ones are like a a lot of weapons.

And it's like, okay, so you're making a hero and then you're equipping them.

Like, what's the, I want to learn more about that stuff.

Obviously, I don't have enough answers and I'm not skilled in any way.

For example, I was looking at the online database they have on stream last weekend and they had a

flashback mechanic.

And I was like, oh, that's so cool.

Because like Tara has flashback and like the whole point of that is she's flashing back the one she was mind controlled.

It's like, oh, that's very good for the story.

And I was like, is that new?

And everyone's like, no, dude, they've they've had that for a while.

I was like, Well, that just shows you how little magic I played actually over the last few years.

Because I was like, Oh, what a new fun mechanic!

And they're like,

No, dude, that's been around.

So we'll see.

I clearly don't know enough, but I'm like feeling the vibe again.

They got me, and apparently, uh, they got a lot of other people because I guess it's like the biggest, the highest-selling release they've had ever.

Dang, yeah, no, that explains why it's hard to find online, that's for sure.

Do they ever do re-releases of like these special sets?

Nope.

Damn.

Yeah.

So, and that's because I really had to stop myself from getting the Bloomboro set, which is just like little cute rabbits and mice with shields and shit.

Like just awesome stuff.

But

yeah, I was like, no, don't do it.

Don't do it, Jesse.

Don't do it.

And yet here we are.

Here we are.

Here we are.

I guess

Secret Lab is making cards too

that are going to be Final Fantasy Base that'll come out.

And then there's also cards that are only in Japan.

Look, it's a fool's errand to think you're going to collect them all.

You have to be an insanely rich person to think that's going to happen.

So good luck to my Saudi princes.

Anyway,

that's pretty much what I did this week.

Nice.

Yeah.

The only other thing that I played is I'm still chugging along on Black Reliquary.

But I finally hit the point where I'm having to abandon a lot.

And I realized I need to like pair.

But it's hard because you, you, once you have a bunch of level three,

for anybody who's never played Darkest Dungeon before, you level up your like mercenaries, and they can be a variety of different classes.

And

they can die in battle.

And, you know, it's fine.

They're meant to be seen as expendable, but I try to keep people alive as long as possible because you also have that XCOM element of like, the longer you can keep them alive the more powerful they will get but you wind up with all of these characters that hit level three and then they'll refuse to go on the beginning missions

so I currently have mostly level threes but I haven't gotten the funds I've I've focused so much on like okay I'm gonna try to every time I go out I'm gonna try to have somebody you know a bad quirk getting dealt with or we're healing a disease or you know anybody who's stressed out sure that getting getting rid of their stress, right?

So every time that I come back into town, I have the only people I need to deal with are the people that just came back and everybody else is fine.

But what's wound up happening now is the relics that you bring back that I need in order to give people better weapons, better skills, better armor.

I've been spending on other things potentially.

And so now I have all these levels.

And when I'm like, okay, I'll go on a veteran mission.

I'll go on a mission for level threes.

And like, yeah, you know, they've got the right weapon and they don't have the right armor.

Their skills are still level one, but like, I'm sure they'll be fine.

And I have to abandon every fucking time

because it's, it's just, you hit this hump.

There's a hump where you've got all these level threes and you're like, I can't take you anywhere.

I can't take you anywhere.

You're too soft.

But they're, but they're egotistical now.

And they're like, that mission's beneath me.

If you take them on a, on a smaller mission.

So

it, it feeds into one of the like base hub mechanics is expanding your roster.

So you have to get new people, you have to keep doing it.

Yeah.

So like expanding how many people are going to be there as like options to be hired, how many people you can just have on your basic rotation.

And the reason that they let you keep upping that number

is because

Eventually you do get to this point where it's like, okay, well, I still need people to go on the baby missions.

I can't just have a bunch of level threes.

Like, I need, I need, I need more babies.

And you hit the point where maybe you're like,

Doctor needs people for

bit, huh?

Baby missions.

She needs more babies.

Okay, yeah, nice.

You said baby missions, but then at the same time, you said, I just need more babies.

And so that's the best.

I need more babies.

My other issue currently is I don't have any beginner level healers.

So I need to be sending people on beginning missions, but I don't have any healers.

All of my healers have leveled up.

And so one of the other things that you keep trying to do is be like, okay, well, I want you to give me a bigger variety of people when I come back into town so that I can specifically grab healers, you know, but then maybe the one healer that they bring in has the worst fucking quirk in the world.

And you're like, I could fix them.

But do I want to?

That costs money, right?

It's, it's a whole big balancing act.

And it happens again once you need hard missions.

But what is like the the money-making strategy in that um so there's a there's a class called the antiquarian um and she specifically you can put her in your group um how is doctor kidding babies any different than just these pirate kids because i'm calling them babies as a as a goof and you meant a ship of actual children

under the age of i'm i'm calling them babies slash affectionate but they're adults i was being plenty affectionate.

Uh-huh.

But I meant what I said.

I wasn't being superfluous with my words.

Right, sure.

When I said children, I meant it.

Babies, though, you're hiring mercenaries.

You make it sound like that's a benefit to you, that that's a feather in your cap.

It's not, it's

burning feathers in real time.

Yeah.

So you can take antiquarians and they basically, every time you you like rifle through stuff that could have you know relics treasures whatever you'll get more of those things but the drawback is that she's not a particularly like strong fighter or anything she she takes up a slot with the benefit of getting funds

so yeah

depending on how you feel about your mercenaries maybe you just grab a bunch of dudes and you're like i don't really give a shit if the comp is

I'm just sending you in there to get some money and then maybe die.

You know, once we're down to one person, I'll leave.

So it, you know, you can treat them as extremely expendable if you want.

At this point, I think we have four deaths.

So doing okay, considering that it's meant to be like a really difficult mod.

Four deaths is all right, but

I do want to get over this hump and hit the point where I can go on veteran missions and have heart palpitations.

Like, who's going to die this time?

So that's where I'm at.

Yeah, I was burnt out in those games when I got to like the mid to late game because there would just be something so

like if you were not built for that specific boss or that like encounter, then it would just wreak havoc.

And it's like, well, there goes my 30-hour

protagonist character.

And it's like such a, such a heartbreak.

I think it, I think it, that feeling of like rush is also impacted by streaming it.

Yeah.

Because you're always like very aware of how much time you're taking to play through a game on stream.

And so me having to say like, well, I guess I'm just going to need to keep doing beginner missions for, despite having all veteran character part of me that's like, and that's going to take so long to finally get the supplies I need to outfit veterans.

But that's the, that's the game.

You know, I think that's a good, a good point that I think about a lot is what is that point where the friction of the grind becomes too much that you don't want to stream it anymore.

Yeah.

I think some people enjoy that sort of content and there's some games that make it as satisfying of a loop as possible.

Like a Kaiser Iron Man, sort of.

Yeah, it's like, yes, we are doing this,

and then that's the game.

That's the point.

Yeah.

But then there's like, oh, we're all here for that big mission that you're gearing up for.

But then it's like a four-hour stream to get ready for it.

And then even then, you're like, we should maybe do this next time.

And then it's like, well, suddenly the expectations of everyone's like,

you'll never really know what you're going to get when you.

So at least that's the stuff that goes through my head.

I don't know if that's the same thing.

I think every,

you know what?

Screw it.

I'll say it.

Every good streamer definitely thinks about that all the time.

You know what I mean?

Did he just say that?

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Only on Geek Enders are you going to get hot tickets?

Yeah, I know.

I know.

No, I think like anyone who cares about their content at any bit is thinking, all right, when is the point where I got to stop doing this particular thing?

And

yeah, like Playing Through Expedition 33 is a great example of that, where there's some fights that, yeah, I could bash my head against the wall on this out of nowhere Dark Souls battle,

or we could move on and I could come back to it.

And even though there are definitely people in chat who are like, for it, dude, you got this.

I'm like, look, I definitely believe I got this.

Just not right now.

Like,

I will do it.

I will come back and beat up this giant, goofy-headed idiot.

But

if I miss a parry and I get one shot, I'm not ready right now to do this because I'm not that great at parrying.

And I know I'll miss a few.

So if missing one equals death and the guy I'm fighting every time I miss a parry gets to attack again,

I'll come back.

People are like, oh, no.

Yeah.

And, you know, a lot of the time it's as simple as like, well, look, there's stuff in the room and I could loot that right now.

Or

leave it empty, leave it there.

So I remember to come back here.

even if I don't need to fight the boss.

At least I'll remember to do that.

It was like, you're missing the loot.

I'm like,

come, come.

Come, like, some babies.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's okay.

And I think, yeah, you have to make that balance between the two, or otherwise, you're going to get caught up in some of the stupidest like 12 hours later.

And I don't want to be that guy.

I don't need people making live stream fails of me like, he's so bad at games, dude.

He's terrible.

Like, I feel that way already.

I don't mind spending quite a few hours on

a boss that I am enjoying, where I know the mechanics are really good, and it feels satisfying to just beat it.

For me, it's more like what I'm not a long-distance streamer like Sam is.

I'm not pulling the same hours.

So when I'm playing a game, kind of like what we were talking about with like Blueprints or like Hollow Knight.

a couple weeks ago, I felt like I've gotten to the point now where I realize I have a limit to how much time I'm going to invest into this game.

Right.

And it's okay to be

upfront about a stopping point for me.

For Hollow Knight, people kept asking, how much are you going to do?

And I'm like, I'm going to stop once it's, once I've done, like, I have a little checklist in my mind.

I know I want to do the Grim Troop.

I know I want to beat Radiance.

And beyond that, once I'm done with those, I'm...

I might just be done, you know?

And with Blueprints, it was, I realize that you can get the credits and there's a bunch more to do after that.

Once we hit the credits, if I want to be done, then I'm done.

I think that's okay, you know, because I just, I want to play other stuff too.

So, yeah, I think it's about

if you want that information, if you want to see that scene, pick up the game yourself.

It's not Dodger's job to show it to you.

You know what I mean?

Or is it?

Oh, hold on.

Damn it.

Damn it.

That was the screenshot.

That was the episode screenshot.

We could have used that for a thumb.

This one?

Oh, yeah.

That's the winner.

Okay.

And

what a happy Kraken face.

Just happy to be here.

I like that.

That's good.

That's a wiener.

Yep.

Perfect.

Yeah.

Well,

is it time for some news, kids?

Are we

good?

All right.

Well, boy, oh boy.

Let me tell you, right off the bat, in selfish news,

Xbox released a 10th anniversary Witcher 3 controller.

It was gone so quickly that I didn't even have time to want it.

I saw it and was like, oh, wow, cool.

Instantly sold out.

So shout out to everyone who got one of those.

Like always, anytime I want to buy something I love, it's gone.

So it makes life easier for me.

I never have to worry about filling my house with useless trash because I can't get it.

So awesome.

So true.

It makes life easy.

In the world of movies, we'll start with the fact that Mission Impossible, the newest one, is out.

I very much want to see it because I enjoy watching Tom Cruise, beat Tom Cruise on a screen for two hours.

And

kind of like Fast and Furious movies, they've only gotten better with time.

I think because people stopped giving a damn.

And honestly, that's what I'm here for.

Make your crazy film, Tom.

You go nuts.

Yes.

There's a point where it's like, we just want to make another one and nobody really knows what's going to happen in it.

So we're just going to do whatever we want.

And that's enjoyable i like that i was i i will stand by this i love what like the last fast fierce movie is insane it is if you look at it on its on the surface insane but jason mamoa being over the top frat bro joker for two hours was great was great i loved that i was like this is fantastic so more of that please also in movies For those of you who want to get real weird with it, Elden Ring, a movie is coming.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah.

I forgot about that.

A24 tapped ex-Machina director Alex Garland to write and direct.

Those who are curious, he also wrote and direct Annihilation, Men and Civil War,

along with writing 28 Days Later and Sunshine.

So that's going to be super interesting.

George R.

Martin, once again, set to produce, which means those of you who want a song of ice and fire book, good luck.

That is never happening.

It's done.

He's doing that happen now.

Yeah.

I would lose my mind if it's like, it's here.

I wouldn't believe it.

I'd be like, no,

false.

And then also, more news from A24.

I guess this is the first big test is Elden Ring.

And then after that, potentially a Death Stranding movie with Kojima.

So that's probably a movie they could really do, do, because everyone in it is like a real-ass actor.

Is an actual actor, yeah.

And half the people in Death Stranding now are like.

Well, all right.

Most of them were already big, but like some of the stars who were kind of like, oh, yeah, okay, are now big, like Hollywood actors.

So

that could be very interesting to see how they do that.

Is Elden Ring even filmable?

Well, great question.

I imagine giving it to...

That's not our job.

We don't need to figure that part out.

That's their job.

I imagine giving it to Annihilation guy could work, though.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I trust his approach.

If you haven't seen

that movie,

the Machinima.

That'd be cool.

That'd be very cool.

Yeah, if you haven't seen Annihilation, it is

pretty eldritchy.

It's pretty wild.

And I feel like that's the vibe you could bring to it.

Especially, you know, if you're writing 28 Days Later and stuff, there's definitely like, all right, this feels like the right guy to tell this story.

What that story will be, I don't know, because I don't know how you do a, we're going to retell the story of Eli, I don't think that's possible.

So, what story do you tell from that world?

Don't know.

I have a game for us.

Yeah.

If you really wanted to ruin the vibes of the Elden,

who would you count it

sorry yeah yeah yeah oh

as the chosen one yeah

melania oh no no no no that'll be so funny uh melania is jack black for sure oh yeah oh jack black yeah yeah uh what it foul dance

Spread the rhyme.

I don't, who is the rock?

The rock has to be someone.

I don't want to make him Radon.

Radon.

Yeah.

No,

that's Kevin Hart.

Kevin Hart is Radon.

You know what was like a real big jump scare in the Dogman movie is Ricky Gervais voiced a character.

Really?

I think Ricky Gervais should be in Elden Ring.

Oh, my God.

Creature.

Just his voice.

I would just want his voice in there somewhere.

What is the name of the guy who screams in the DLC?

What is his name?

The guy.

During the fight, he screams the entire damn fight.

He's like, curse you.

Aegon?

Agon, they're saying.

Yeah.

Bail.

Yeah.

He's like, God, you back.

That guy, I want him to be Matt Berry, please.

Oh, my God.

Matt Berry and Aegon.

I don't care what movie it is.

Just more Matt Berry, please.

I would love to.

I would love to hear this.

Now we're doing this.

I like Matt Berry, though.

Right, but I'm just trying to think of great, like, that would be so.

We got

a family it's just him.

Like, oh, that'd be great.

Yeah, those are the ones I need that kind of stuff.

Yeah.

Oh, my gosh.

We could throw Tina Fey in there somewhere.

Oh, yeah.

Who's the like mushroom cap witch lady?

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

Rainy.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

We need.

Who is the

Margot?

I think should be Nick Cage.

That would be amazing.

Oh, I thought you'd have Margot Robbie.

No, no.

That's a funny way to say that.

Margot is Margot Robbie.

Margot Robbie.

Yeah, Margot Robbie.

Yeah, we got to get everyone there.

Who is Zendaya playing?

Zendaya is playing.

Ooh, Matthew Lillard's patches.

Yo, that's a win.

I like that.

That's actually, that'd be great.

Yeah.

Oh, Zendaya obviously is the one girl you meet early on.

I can't remember her name, but she's the one who's like,

oh, I'm good friends with the guy who does all your blacksmithing needs.

Blacksmith?

Yeah, that girl.

Oh, yeah.

But then the the blacksmith guy who's all ugly, Tom Holland.

Okay.

And now he's like sexy.

He's like super sexy.

And that's what.

And then the two of them together.

I'm just going to go see it for the two of them.

They'll be like, oh, they're in love in the movie?

Done.

And now to like really bring it all together, we need the actor who was a one-hit wonder in a TV show a long time ago and no one's seen in anything since.

And this is going to be their like breakout.

Like, oh my god, I haven't seen that guy in anything in so long.

I must stress, seeing Danny DeVito as dung eater is not cool.

I don't like that at all.

I don't want to even see what that looks like.

I don't even want to know.

Like, Danny would go in 100%, and I hate that.

Oh, yeah.

It would suck.

What's my job?

Dung eater?

Done.

Yeah.

I got this.

So, uh, yeah.

Scars guards are every

character.

Every character is a Scars Guard.

A Scars Guard, yeah.

Yeah.

Cool.

Also in the news, speaking of movies, the James Bond-esque intro to Metal Gear Solid Snake Eater and the remake Delta is now online.

You can watch a whole video.

It literally is a redone intro that looks just like a Bond film.

It has the snakes doing like the Bond snake thing.

It's very cute.

It's definitely what you imagine they were thinking when they made the song originally.

And so I absolutely love it.

And I will say, it's a good version.

However, the best version I think is still the version from 8-Bit Big Band.

It's awesome.

It's so cool.

Look it up.

Very good redone version of that song.

And hey, in the games industry, Embracer Group, once again, still a complete mess.

They bought so many brands and franchises and don't know what to do with it.

And now the Lord of the Rings group is being rebranded and they're trying to come up with a bunch of different stuff over there.

Yeah.

It was called Middle-earth and Friends, but it'll now be known as Fellowship Entertainment and handle such IP as Lord of the Rings, Kingdom Come Deliverance, Metro, Dead Island, Killing Floor, Darksiders, Tomb Raider, and more.

So

wait, what?

Okay.

What Fellowship of Friends?

What?

Middle-earth and Friends will now be known as Fellowship Entertainment.

What is what is under the Embracer Group umbrella?

What is so hard to understand about that, Kraken?

Okay, and they own all all that IP now.

Oh, they have for a while.

They just don't know what to do with it.

Okay.

They just, it definitely feels like

in Hollywood, they do this a lot.

Where if something's popular, they'll just buy the rights to it.

And they may never do anything with it.

Embracer Group was kind of the same.

Every time during the big sort of COVID collapse, they went around and bought up everything.

They bought up all the Western stuff from Square Enix.

They bought up like a bunch of European companies.

They definitely pulled a,

we want to be like Xbox, except

not.

And so

yeah, they just aren't, they aren't making anything.

Like, yeah, they bought Deus Ex and then killed it.

And I'm like, all I wanted was a conclusion to Adam Jensen's story.

Why did that be like this?

Yeah.

So I hate capitalism.

Yeah.

Embrace the group for a brief moment in 2022-ish.

I was like, this, oh, God, they're going to save everything.

This is so cool.

I'm so excited.

And then they immediately failed.

So who knows what will happen?

But I'm hoping they fix whatever the hell is going on on that ship.

And

we go on from there.

Also,

I guess back in the same movie verse,

we have a whole new set of Mortal Kombat movies coming.

Cool.

Now,

yeah, I guess the last one did well enough that they're making another, but more importantly,

Mortal Kombat's longtime competition in the world of nerds has always been Street Fighter.

It's always Street Fighter, Mortal Kombat.

Well, if you're going to have Mortal Kombat movies, you better have a Street Fighter movie.

And so it looks like Jason Momoa and Roman Reigns of Wrestling Fame are tapped for a Street Fighter movie adaptation.

Okay.

I don't know what the hell that's going to be or who the hell they're going to play, but

it looks like it's coming.

And

we're going to.

I have no clue what this is going to be.

I couldn't even tell you.

But after four weekends of a Minecraft movie making $816 million at the global box office, I guess people are starting to look at movies and say, oh, well, let's just take video games and make them a thing.

This plus Mario have been huge.

And

yeah, we'll see.

I do not know.

I don't know what the plot would be.

I don't know who the villain would be.

I mean, I guess it would be M.

Bison.

Kind of, I want to see a Jason Momoa M Bison, but I don't know what that would even look like.

No clue what that would be.

But shout out to them trying to get a Street Fighter movie done.

Capcom is involved in some way, and so we'll see what that ends up being.

Hey, everyone remember the PlayStation loyalty program, the Stars program?

If you don't,

if you don't, don't worry.

They've already killed it off.

Nice.

All right.

It was a thing where...

That's the first thing I don't have to retain in my memory.

That's great.

It was a thing where you had an app on your phone and every time you did anything on playstation be buy a game play a game whatever you could unlock points and stars and you could use those to buy in-game things you could use it to buy games you could collect little statues to display in a display case on your app for whatever reason and yeah it would be like oh if you want this statue you got to play this game for 20 minutes or whatever.

Very similar to what Discord is doing now down the corner where it's like, watch this video or play this game, and you get a little thing.

Same premise.

And then at some point last year, the app just stopped working one day.

And then they sent out a letter like, oh, we're redoing the app.

And then I don't think they ever actually redid it.

And then now they've confirmed it's dead.

So

another thing that was a terrible idea is now gone.

So very cool.

Goodbye.

Stars loyalty program.

It sucks because I like the idea of if you're playing a lot of our games,

you accrue something that lets you buy a game or like get a game for free occasionally, you know?

But yeah, that's huff.

Huff?

That's huff.

That's huff, dude.

So huff.

That's so huff.

Speaking of huff, things might get not very huff in lies of P because, hey, the game is now going to offer difficulty settings, three different levels

for a base game and the expansion that's coming down the road.

I believe it's Lies of P Overture.

I think that's going to introduce the new options.

So for people who are curious and they're like, why?

Essentially, they're like, we want a wider audience to play the game.

And I get it.

Yeah.

Good on them.

They're allowed to.

For people like, it's going to ruin the game.

Don't change the settings.

Anyway.

It's also their game, and I think they have the right to make changes if they'd like.

It's not going to ruin anything the dlc the expansion is gonna allow you to go back and replay old bosses there's gonna be a boss rush mode there's gonna be all sorts of different things added to it so that should be very very fun and also i guess the bosses are tier based so you have to unlock the different tiers to fight the harder and harder bosses in the bosses

so i think that's pretty fun i can't i can't say enough good things about lies of p i thought that game was so good

Yeah, it's a it's a very having not played it, but watched Octo play it.

Great game very cool.

I'm not a big uh throw myself against a boss until I beat it kind of guy.

I'm a power level and go kill everyone because I spent 20 hours grinding a guy named like thug one.

I mean like his whole extended family of players right

like Liza P,

it's not it's it has that like weird punishing gameplay loop like Dark Souls does, but they really did put a lot of work in like the characters and the story and all of that.

And if you want to experience that,

you know, it sucks that you have to just put yourself through hell.

Every game has to be just a

punishing hellscape.

Like, they want people to experience the other aspects of the game that they put a lot of work into.

Yeah.

It's beautiful.

It is a genuinely very interesting game.

Some of the best speedruns I've ever seen are people who play that game because the amount of stuff you can just not do is hilarious.

The amount of times you just watch a guy just run by everything.

It's like, you don't, I don't even have to open that.

You climb up here and you jump off this wall and you're on the other side.

So, like, what are you even doing?

I'm just like, yeah, this is cool as shit.

I love a good speed run.

I'm actually very excited for whoever does the speed run of Expedition 33 because I imagine that would be incredible.

Yes.

I was going to ask about if the speedrun for Blueprints, because I think that is also going to be cool.

I've seen people already post their day one, like on day one, they beat the game.

Yeah.

What?

Yeah.

I think beating is giving them 46, but like beating.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Dang.

I don't know how you...

Like, you would have to be very good at knowing exactly what to place where

and when.

Because they're sometimes clearly just making a wrong decision locks you out and you're done.

So getting a day one, that's a skill level I don't have.

My brain don't work like that.

I don't know.

Yeah.

Then, speaking of sequels, Cyberpunk 2077 is getting a sequel apparently set in future chicago so that'll be a thing don't know what that's gonna be like but i hope they do events in chicago so i can convince

his home yeah

that'd be fun yeah so that'll be cool is it yeah mid i don't know i have no idea what they call the the chicago version of night city huh probably like

windy night city

Well, it can't be.

Yeah, it has to be something, but it has to be like dystopian.

Like

Portillos presents the windy city, you know, like something really crappy like that.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Also, Stellar Blade 2 is coming.

We're going to get a Stellar Blade sequel, it looks like, sooner than expected.

Apparently, they're looking for a real fast turnaround.

So I don't imagine like an updated graphical powerhouse, but I don't think that's what people are playing anyway.

So

expect that to come down the pipeline as well.

And then, obviously, in releases, Doom came out and

blew up, selling very, very well.

And Famitsu gave Expedition 33 nines across the board, which is very, very high for a non-JJRPG.

And

in the world of video game people who just amaze me to no end, first off,

Good old Randy Pitchford coming through saying that real fans will find a way to buy Borderlands 4 at $80 when asked if the price was too high.

Just a truly bad response.

Just, you know, just not the smartest thing to say, but it is ironically what you would expect.

Yeah.

Randy definitely does have a way with words.

And so

that is, you know.

I like that he he could have very, or whoever commented on that could have very easily been like look

you know we're not in control of market value like there are other people that decide the game is worth you know yes instead he's like are you a real fan or not idiot

i think i think the thing that needs to be said here is and we've talked about this before and i find it fascinating so His full quote is, if you're a real fan, you'll find a way to make it happen.

My local game store had Starflight for Sega Genesis for $80 in 1991 when I was just out of high school working minimum wage in an ice cream parlor in Pismo Beach, and I found a way to make it happen.

So, absolutely, I'm on the same page of when I was a kid, games were very expensive, and I understand that.

And if I really wanted a game, I would buy it.

Like, I get mentally where he's at, but it's such a different world that I think

people have completely forgotten that, yes, absolutely, when it was 1994 and I wanted to go play,

you know, like a new

Super Nintendo game.

I clearly couldn't afford it.

When I was young, my parents got me two games a year, birthday and Christmas.

That was it.

But I was like, I played so many games though.

I had access to so many games.

The reason why is because I had Blockbuster Video and I would literally go to Blockbuster and rent games every weekend.

Yeah, the games that you bought were an investment that you knew you were going to spend a lot of time on.

Yeah.

Yeah.

They were games like Final Fantasy VI.

They were games like

one Christmas, my parents got me the Super Scope, and all the games that came for free with the Super Scope.

I don't know what other games came with it because I only ever played the games that came with the Super Scope.

But there were games that then you could get at Blockbuster, that you could play with it.

Like that guy, 90% of what I played came from rentals.

And I think that's the difference.

There's nothing like that right now, really.

There are a few things similar, but there's not really anything like that.

And so, yeah, games were expensive, but you had ways to play them, and now there aren't ways to do that.

And you're asking, like, well, if you want to play it, this is how you have to play it.

You can't rent borderlands for anywhere,

and so it's a different, entirely different place.

And to be like, hey, man, if you want it, you'll get it.

Yeah, well, if it was 1991, yeah, sure, yes, that's the vibe.

Now you might want it, but you just like,

I don't know.

It's a weird, it's, it's definitely a uh, I'm, I'm not living in the current 2025 as everyone else vibe

Sure.

Yeah, I guess the closest the closest version is Game Pass, right?

Sure, yeah, yeah, of like what we used to be able to do

Yeah, but you're locked in with that you're locked into one console, you know like sure you can get PC Game Pass, which I highly recommend.

It's great.

Um

but you're kind of locked in, right?

If uh

you want to play a game that's coming on PlayStation, good luck.

Unless you have ps plus expert pro premium or whatever the hell they have yeah it kind of sucks because back in the day you would all right i got the console i can just go rent games for it like when i had a playstation or even rent the console yeah you could rent consoles back in the day yep i rented the reason why i learned whatever that was the the game boy vr whatever that one the vr boy whatever that was called Virtual Boy?

Virtual Boy.

Virtual Boy.

The reason I realized it sucked complete ass is because I rented it from Blockbuster, tried it for for a weekend, and was like, it's unlook-at-able.

It hurts your eyes.

Everything sucks in it.

You have to set it down on tables and hunch over to play.

I was like, nah, this is terrible.

Otherwise, you know, I could have been one of those idiots who bought one.

And so,

yeah, it was that kind of thing where if you have access to being able to try it out and rent it, it really does wonders, especially for a kid.

Because most of the time when you play games, especially as a kid,

it's like a day.

You're You're playing it for a little bit, and then you get bored and you move on.

And as a parent, I can imagine being like, I bought you so many games.

What the hell?

And it isn't until you, you know, when I had a PlayStation, the only game I owned for a long time was Final Fantasy VII, the reason I bought a PlayStation.

And after that, I rented everything else.

I borrowed my cousin Sega Genesis, and she let me take two games.

And I was like, I'm on top of the world, baby.

And especially since back in the day, a lot of the Super Nintendo games.

Like, I remember renting Super Star Wars.

F that game.

I don't think I got past the first level.

That game can kiss my whole ass.

And that's

good lesson learned.

I can't imagine buying it and hating it.

You know?

Like, there are only so many games where, you know, I really want to have that game so I can keep playing it over.

Like, Super Mario World, perfect replayable game.

And it came with the damn thing.

So, you know, whatever.

That's where we're at.

Welcome to the games industry.

And then finally,

an interesting article over on uh game speaking of games industry games industry.biz about

again another infamous character in the gaming world peter molyneux about the game milo and kate which if you remember was this thing that he was working on that was going to like redefine what the connect was and apparently at the nordic games conference he was recently asked in a q a about

that

And

he regaled the crowd with this story about the first time that he tried a Kinect and how it was actually like

way better than what actually released.

And

he said, what do I think?

Well, I said, firstly, when he did the demo, he was jumping all over the room and he said, I'm a gamer.

I don't want to play a game standing up, Maltney recalled.

That's the first thing.

I don't, it doesn't appeal to me.

I want to sit back.

I want to smoke what I smoke.

I want to drink what I drink.

And I don't want to prance around like a twat, is what he said.

Oh my God.

He wanted to make a game where you talk with someone.

Anyone who's a parent will probably experience this, he explained.

There's a moment where you realize you're crafting, inspiring a human being.

Wouldn't it be incredible to do the same thing in a game around that feeling?

Wouldn't it be incredible to create an experience around that?

About inspiring, in Milo's case, a boy, that was contentious in itself because, of course, lots of people go dark with that idea.

Anyway.

He worked, he started working on this, and I guess the connect they showed him was eventually downgraded because he said the one they were going to originally have was like $5,000.

And he's like, so they clearly downgraded it, which made the project we were working on completely obsolete because the window of what the field of view of the camera was was shrunk dramatically.

And so there's nothing to do.

And he's like, yeah, that's that's what kind of what happened.

And he said the death knell for Project Milo in his eyes was that Microsoft decided to market the Kinect as a party device rather than a gaming device, a thing he absolutely hated.

He did not like the idea of, I assume, the Star Wars dance game.

He was not thrilled.

Wait,

was that the same conference that he revealed Project Milo and the Star Wars dance game happened the same year?

Maybe?

Because that would be crazy.

That's hilarious if that's the case.

Followed by the Star Wars dance moment.

Ugh, man.

Peter Molyneux is such a fascinating character.

And I know he's controversial, but there's something about the way he describes seeing the world, whether you believe it or not, that I find

so enrapturing.

And

even if I can suspend disbelief long enough to like see his, the vision he's like pitching, I think is so like

interesting because

what he's describing is like a thing that there is no demand for in the like our world, but in his world, this is like the,

you know, apex art form.

He is

even just for a moment, you can, he can convince you that you want it to.

Yeah.

Yes.

He's a very good salesman.

Little virtual Milo.

Yeah, he's a very good salesman.

He's a great pitcher.

He has a lot of ideas.

And I think it's fascinating because there are other people who have ideas and they can execute those ideas.

I don't know that he can.

I think his ideas are so out there that they may, in fact, be impossible to execute properly.

Like looking at all his games catalog and everything he's doing, you can see that like

conceptually, he can 100% sell you on the idea.

Because everything he's making, I'm like, all right, yeah, I'd like to see what that would look like.

But the idea of creating them, I'm like, there's no way, dude.

I don't know how you could make this.

And it's interesting because you see people like Kojima who are like, I want to make a game about connections.

And you're like, okay, what's the game?

You walk carrying mail.

Oh, so like the movie The Postman that flopped, like that, but there's goop monsters and the bad guy is in incel.

And you're like, what?

What are you doing?

What are we doing?

And he's like, I'm going to make it.

I'm going to fund the whole thing.

Let's get crazy.

And then it comes out and you're like,

he definitely did this.

And yeah,

it's a game, all right.

And that's, that's fascinating to me.

Because at the same time, I think Death Stranding is,

it is somehow completely boring and yet completely beautiful and stunning.

And it's like, I just don't know how to describe it.

And I feel like that's where Molly is angling for.

He's like, yeah, it's going to be a boring experience, but it'll be like stunning that it exists.

Yeah, yeah.

i don't know but that's uh we got some answers on that and that is the news i

i appreciate that there were answers and he seemed candid about it um and i i i do believe for the record that like seeing a early prototype of technology and then building an experience around that and then having that downgraded would absolutely you know, cut a project at the knees.

So

I don't think he's bullshitting on that part, but whether or not it was...

I don't know.

The whole concept of the Project Milo Milo was always weird to begin with.

Yes.

I don't know.

I think him saying people would get dark with it is an understatement.

When we got footage of that, everyone was creeped out.

Everyone.

People were like,

what?

It's you and a little boy?

This isn't right.

And I know where he came from a place of like genuine, like...

What if you could connect with the child and raise that child and you could do it in a game?

And I get it?

Super creepy.

It's the same thoughts I had when they showed off the Nintendo Switch 2 camera system and streaming.

Like, you can call your friends.

You're playing with them.

Like, that's going to get creepy real quick.

But then they're like, but you have to log in.

You have to show your name.

And I was like, okay, well, that's good.

And they're like, but not for the first year.

And I was like, all right, never mind.

Got a year of creeps.

It's going to be the launch year for Nintendo Switch 2 is going to be a bunch of creeps.

So there you go.

Yep.

Good stuff.

But that's the news.

Hot dog.

What are you up to this week, you two crazy kids?

What are you up to this week, buddy?

I'm going to a festival tomorrow, hanging out with my sister and cousin while I'm in the UK.

Gonna visit Stockholm.

We're gonna visit Rafiuri Dev there.

Cool.

Going to TwitchCon EU,

meeting up with friends there.

And then I'm bouncing back.

the US finally.

It's been like two...

It'll be like almost a three-week trip that I've been gone so awesome i miss games i'll be honest i i i kind of miss streaming and stuff so now can i ask you a question why haven't you delved into the world of i went on this trek and i'm going to stream all of it

i've done a couple irl streams but i

i'm still kind of getting my feet wet with them i feel like and i want to make sure that I'm able to do it in a way that's never imposing on people I'm around.

I'm very careful about being like respectful and not coming across as like, you know, ignorant American foreigner that's like shoving people in your face.

You're a good person is what you're saying?

I try to be, but I really want to,

I think there's something beautiful, though, about like going somewhere new and then

finding it with an audience or with people that are kind of long for the ride and kind of see your genuine reaction to stuff.

Like I was in Brighton.

I did an IRL stream in Brighton a couple of days ago, and we went into this like festival area and the security is checking everyone's bags.

And so I had my streaming backpack that I was going in.

Like, oh, we got to check in there.

And he was checking in, and I forgot that I had left in there these little, like,

I like going to like thrift stores and finding weird little things to collect.

And so this guy sees these like brown wrapped, like,

like firm objects.

And he's like, what's this then, mate?

And I'm like, oh, those are tiny porcelain monks.

And he's like, huh.

And he was like,

yeah, be careful with them.

Make sure they don't get broken.

And he's like, go on in.

He just believed me because he's like,

there's no way this guy's going to lie.

He's like, carrying.

They're very strange lies.

And they were.

They were.

They were tiny porcelain monks.

And I could have proved it to him.

Although I bet somewhere someone's like, porcelain monks?

Yeah, that's drugs.

Yeah, yeah.

It's tiny porcelain monks, dude.

Oh, that's the new street drug, porcelain monks.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Right.

Yeah.

It was fun, though.

Like, moments like that happen to me all the time, but I forgot.

Like I was just happening to be streaming at the time.

And so everyone watching was like, hello?

Like, what do you mean this, this just happens to you?

I'm like, oh, yeah, this is, this is very powerful for the course.

So it's kind of fun to like be able to kind of be who you are outside the screen and have like viewers along for the ride that can just kind of get to know.

like you in a different environment.

So I have been trying to get more used to that, but I need to figure out how to do it reliably in a way that isn't imposing on anyone.

So do you, Jesse, do you know the like selfie sticks that get edited out in the video?

Yes.

He had never seen them before.

I got to show him his first weird video of a blurred hand.

Yeah, and I have long arms, so I can just hold it way far out of the way.

It would look so eerie.

Always.

0.5.

Yeah, I never understand.

I really respect the whole backpack camera situation.

But after a while, the whole selfie stick thing, I'm like, nah, that's for the birds.

I don't, that seems like a hassle.

I don't like that.

It's too much.

There's got to be a way to do it that's more fun.

But I also think the idea of walking around streaming with a cameraman is also very intrusive on everyone else's day.

Like, that always annoys me because it's like, I got 15 people, we're filming.

It's like, yeah, people got stuff to do, man.

Like, the world isn't your bedroom.

I don't know, especially considering most real filming you need permits for and things.

So I don't know.

But

yeah,

I always get weird out when I'm like,

you're someplace where the whole point is to be respectful.

And you're like, hey there, chat.

What's up?

It's me broadcasting live

from Westminster.

It's crazy in here.

Look at all these dead people.

This is, can you believe it?

Right now I'm being narrated to by Jeremy Irons.

It's awesome.

Like poggers in the chat for the dead king.

Sucks.

It's exactly like that.

Yeah.

I've seen that exact video.

Doogs, what are you up to?

I'm retaking my immigration test.

Womp, womp.

It's hard, man.

What did you get the first time around?

I don't know because all they do is they send you an email that says fail and I'll get

whoa.

So I have no idea how many I failed, but I know what areas of history I'm really dicey on now.

So I've been just trying to study those sections really well and get the timeline right so that even if I forget a section, I can at least be like, wait, that happened between this event and this event.

So it couldn't have been this date.

You know, if I, if I'm able to sort of

for myself, I think that would be really helpful instead of knowing things sort of like, as like standalone things.

If I can imagine a timeline, sure.

But

it's rough.

It's a very hard test.

Pop quiz, how many years was the 100-year war?

116.

My girl.

There you go.

Hell yes.

Get that.

Don't fall for that.

All right.

Hell yes.

I love this.

You know what's up.

Yeah, I'm learning stuff.

I'm learning stuff.

Awesome.

So, yes, I will do my best.

Wish me luck.

It's a rough test.

If at some point you or someone you love has to do this test, just really take your time with each section of history and make sure that you've got it all down.

Because when you're going through the booklet, you're like, this booklet actually isn't that long considering how much it

has in there.

But they really quiz you on literally anything in those 100 pages.

It's wild.

What year was the Magna Carta?

1215.

What powers did it give?

The Magna Carta was about limiting what the king could do.

Number of members.

I even gave it as a trick question and you got it right.

Oh, I'm so happy.

Yeah, all right.

Hell yeah.

How you failed on it.

What was your question?

Number of members of Scottish Parliament.

192.

95th was 32.

What?

I thought it was 32.

132.

132.

I think it's 192.

Oh, shit.

Maybe that's why you failed.

Maybe.

That's the question.

They were like, no, 100% or nothing, dude.

If you're not first, you're last.

Name three, name three places in the Commonwealth.

129.

That's 129.

That's why you failed.

129.

Shit.

Well, now you know.

Wait, 129?

Yeah.

Oh, my God.

I got the numbies mixed up.

The Commonwealth is the Falkland Islands

and

Canada.

And

oh my gosh.

I don't know.

Does Australia still count?

Is Australia part of the Commonwealth?

I have no idea.

I thought it was.

Jesse, do you not.

You just.

Chad already.

Chad already spoiled the New Zealand and Australia.

It is Australia.

There we go.

Trinidad is the one I was trying to remember.

That's so funny.

Chad already did Australia, New Zealand.

But yeah, I mean, all you got to do is go look at the Commonwealth games.

You can pretty easily figure it out.

Oh my gosh.

One of the questions that he quizzed me on earlier was like, what was it?

In 1921,

which, what games happened?

And it was like the Paralympics, the Commonwealth Games.

And the Euro 2010.

It was like,

I don't know.

I don't know, dude.

It's rough.

It was Paralympics.

It was the Paralympics, by the way.

Yeah.

Anyways, I'm going to do my best.

So wish me luck, etc.

Other than that, still going to be playing some Black Reliquary.

I'm trying to also finish up Proverbs because I never finished that.

It's that Minesweeper-like game where you're making a beautiful painting.

And yeah, maybe we'll start a new thing this week.

I don't know.

Cool.

Over in

Cox Towers,

we are

playing the game Midnight Walk, which is

very cool.

If you you have not seen it or know nothing about it,

imagine a first-person Nightmare Before Christmas game.

Everything is claymation.

It looks so cool.

It is creepy as hell.

And I cannot stress it enough.

Badass game.

Yes.

I need to look that up.

It's very cool.

There's also a few other games that have Midnight in the title.

And so you were talking about that last week.

Yeah, but Midnight Walk is the one that we're currently playing.

And it is very, it's like,

you know, standard horror game.

You're doing horror things, but visually, good God, it is

very, very beautiful to look at.

And even the characters in it definitely have a like, oh, you're just a mayor from Halloween town.

Like, I know you, sir.

Right.

Cute.

But that's it for me, and that is it for us.

Thanks so much for hanging out.

Thanks to both Criken and Dukes for taking the time to boot Sam out of his office for a little bit.

Bro, thanks for saving my butt.

That's what I'm here for.

I like saving butts.

It's, I'm like Superman, but for Anus.

Yeah.

Anyway, that's the show.

Thanks so much.

We'll see y'all next time.

Bye, everybody.

Bye, guys.

Yeah, yeah, you know what time it is.

It's time for the geek in this podcast.

Mega Rand, Jesse and Dodger.

What up?

Let's go.

Yo, it's the weekend.

Yeah, it's time to geek out.

Let it begin.

Go on, stream and shout.

It's Jesse and Dodger.

So give them a follow and see what the geekenders are all about.

Yo, it's the weekend.

Yeah, it's time to geek out.

Let it begin.

Go on, stream and shout.

It's Jesse and Dodger.

So give them a follow.

Number one geek podcast without a doubt.

Yo, another end of another long week.

Got a job and a kid.

I know that you all beat.

So take a second, grab a drink and vibe while we catch you up in just a matter of time.

On gaming, comics, whatever you're doing.

If you're nerdy like us, then you know you should tune in.

Thank you for sharing our world with us.

Now follow, subscribe, and turn this up.

Yo, it's the weekend.

Yeah, it's time to geek out.

Let it begin.

Come on, scream and shout.

It's Jesse and Dodger.

So give them a follow.

Number one geek podcast without a doubt.

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