The Media Got Virginia Embarrassingly Wrong | 1/21/20

That is absolutely insane.

Insane, what Maxine Waters just said.

We got a great show coming up for you in just a second.

I have to tell you, I started making my own dog food.

Now, this is something that you think, excuse me,

but I started making my own dog food a couple of weeks ago, and it's really, really simple.

And I started putting something in called rough greens.

And And rough greens, Vitasmart, makes your food, the dog food taste better even if you don't make your new dog food.

But I have to tell you, we were feeding

Uno stuff, and he hated it.

He would never eat unless one of the family members stood there.

We almost had to hand feed him.

He never would eat.

We started putting rough greens in.

This is this little packet that you can order.

And he runs to the bowl.

Then I was talking to the guy who makes rough greens and he said, You really want to do something right for your dog?

Start making your own dog food.

And I was like, How is how do you do that?

It's really easy.

And I've never seen my dog even react like this.

It is so great.

You don't have to make your own dog food.

You just get rough greens, Vitasmart.

It'll make your dog food better.

They like it, and it's really healthy for them.

You want to see your dog thrive?

Go to roughgreens.com/slash Beck.

That's roughgreens.com/slash slash Beck.

The fusion of entertainment and enlightenment.

Hey, everybody!

The impeachment trial starts today.

Yay!

We'll give you all the details on that in one minute.

This is the Glimbeck program.

Inflammation, it's a word that even sounds like it's not good.

A lot of people in the world suffer from frequent pain, and inflammation is usually the thing causing it.

Inside your body, joints begin to swell, and the next things you know, you have pain radiating outward from those sources into your body.

And I've heard people, you know, inflammation,

just take some ibuprofen.

Shut up, it doesn't work.

Hey, you just had brain surgery.

Take some ibuprofen.

I'm going to give you the strong stuff.

Now, can you handle ibuprofen 800?

Shut up.

It's never worked for me.

Never worked for me.

Now, I tried Relief Factor, and that's why my wife was like, you got to at least try it.

I'm not going to talk to you unless you tread.

I'm like, honey, it's not going to work.

It's ibuprofen 800.

It's not.

It's completely natural, and it works for everybody you work with.

Why won't you try it?

Okay.

So I finally just tried it.

And

my wife wasn't as wrong as she usually is.

I'm just saying.

I am in so much trouble.

She comes home today.

I am dead.

Anyway, 70% of the people who try it order more.

And my wife was exactly right.

Even though she does sound like

this, she sounds like this.

Even though she sounds like that, she was right.

It's relief factor.

It's a drug-free, natural way to ease your pain and get your life back.

Go to relief factor.com.

That's relief factor.com.

Mr.

Pid.

How are you?

Very well, Glenn.

How are you?

Oh, my gosh.

So great.

Just be doing well, too, when your wife gets home after

that commercial.

Very excited to see you, I think.

Nope.

I don't think she is.

She's going to walk into the house and she's going to go, what

the hell has happened here?

Right, and this is my point, yes.

She's please don't start.

Because you've been trying to do these extra things.

Like, I'm going to take down all the Christmas decorations.

Those will get down eventually.

Don't worry about things like that.

Worry about the basics.

Keep your kids alive.

Try not to burn the house down.

Well, I'm going to come back and she's going to think whatever you did sucked anyway.

I wrote her.

I wrote her this morning.

I said, now you're coming home.

I just want you to remember: look at the bright side.

I didn't burn down the house.

All of the kids are alive.

I remembered to feed the dog and the kids, mostly.

So

everything is uphill.

I mean, we did all that.

Now it's just coast down.

The question is now is only how much does she owe you for your incredible work?

Yeah, no.

She's going to come home and she's going to see the house and she's going to be like, what

has happened here?

Honey, I tried to do the.

There's a lot of loads of laundry.

I don't know if it's like this when you're around, but

it never seems like there's laundry to do.

And man, alive, it just suddenly just popped up.

I think the kids had it all dirty in there.

They couldn't wear that many clothes in two weeks.

And then

I did the stupid thing.

I tried to take down the Christmas decorations, and then the house just exploded because

I honestly told her, I said, honey, we have to sell or just dump all the Christmas decorations.

We're buying all new stuff next year.

She's like, why?

I like the fact we have.

Because you screwed it up.

And again, this is why you shouldn't.

I didn't screw it up intentionally, but that's what she's going to say.

Next fall, as she starts to look for the Christmas decorations, this is all I'm going to hear.

What were you thinking?

That's not how you put it.

Well, you put that away.

You put these things together, and what were you thinking?

This is this is so pathetic by you because not only did you

have the obvious excuse, you have multiple excuses to not do anything.

You know, oh, the impeachment thing's going on.

Oh, I think that's about to

summarize.

We're a couple weeks from Iowa.

That's all going on.

Yeah.

You know,

my daughter has a surgery, as you know.

Brain surgery.

Brain surgery.

Brain surgery.

You know, Jeffy, I mean, she wouldn't believe this, but, you know, Jeffy is at a hospital.

I really care about that or whatever.

There's so many things going on.

You could have easily wormed your way out of any work.

You could have left the thing a total mess and been able to justify it.

And instead, you did all this work.

And you're not going to be able to do it.

No, I just feel that.

You know what it is?

Let's just reverse the rules.

If I said to her, I've got to go and, you know, I'm gone for two weeks and I'm going to be in the hospital with my, you you know dying relative

you know just go fill in for me

and she would go

what just go fill in for me and here's all you have to do you just have to do the show and then do a TV show and it'll be fine and the kids will help you

they're teenagers they don't help at all they make things much worse

So

she couldn't do it.

And so this is my argument with her.

You just said, hey, just do these things and it'll be fine.

No, it isn't fine.

No, there's more to your job than you think.

So, this is you're thinking this is a compliment in some way.

Like, you saying that she wouldn't be able to come and just talk on the radio like it's some difficult task and it compares to what she does every day.

That's going to make you look good.

This is your theory.

It's not.

You're going to lose.

No, I'm going to, no, that's the same.

That is the, that's.

See, this one is really horrible because this one,

you know, we pretty, I mean, I can't say I gave it my all, but we tried.

Right.

You know what I mean?

And you just, no matter what, guys know, you lose.

See, you're the Nancy Pelosi in this situation.

What do you mean?

You've gone through the entire...

You've done all the work.

of doing the stupid impeachment thing and acting like you care about the Constitution for a few weeks.

And then at the end of the day, you're going to have nothing to show for it.

It's going to be a giant disaster with no measurable result.

If I'm not here, send help.

If I'm not here tomorrow, send help.

Yeah, you did it to yourself.

This is something so avoidable.

When you have a loss.

Your advice the whole time has been do nothing.

Do nothing.

Do nothing.

Maximize the beauty of your loss.

This is the worst.

Like, let's say you know you're going into a game that you're going to lose by 100 points.

Why try?

Don't even show up.

Go to McDonald's down the street.

Enjoy yourself and just get a forfeit.

You're going to lose anyway.

You should have forfeited this one.

You had no chance of winning.

And now you're going to go through all of this hassle and end up with a giant zilch on the other side.

No.

You're going to get as much credit

for cleaning your house as I do.

I don't want credit.

I just want her to come home and to be like,

I'm home.

And coming into this house the way I've left it, not good.

Not good.

I hope you're listening, sweetheart.

Not good.

Whatever you think it might be, lower your expectations.

The dog was fed every day, twice a day, twice a day.

Count your blessings.

That's a miracle.

That's a miracle.

And he never went to the bathroom in the house.

Took him for walks.

Every never.

Miracle.

The children made it to school fully clothed in their uniform.

Clean.

Miracle.

Now, did they do their homework?

No idea.

Did they

eat Pop-Tarts for dinner occasionally?

Maybe.

I don't know.

Who's counting?

Okay.

Miracle.

Lower your expectations.

Really low.

Very low.

Remember the house that you loved?

That's not really the house you're going to walk into.

So, again, this is just like Nancy Pelosi.

Yeah.

Absolutely.

No, if I was Nancy Pelosi,

I would be saying, oh,

it's perfect.

It's the best.

Your house, it's better now.

You would be lying, is what you're saying.

If you were Nancy Pelosi, you better be lying, which is something you can apply to every situation that involves Nancy Pelosi.

By the way, there is a new book out called Profiles in Corruption by Peter Schweitzer.

Wow.

Here's what's amazing.

Look at this.

It's a 300-page book, and the last 104 pages

is all

fine print footnotes.

I mean, this thing is so well documented.

Let me give you one of the stories.

An extensive overlap in Frank Biden's dealings and Obama Biden.

Frank Biden.

Yeah, it's a brother.

Yeah.

In their foreign policy in Central America,

has just been exposed in this book.

Frank Biden first set his sights on

Central America back in 2009 as the Obama administration began to repair the U.S.

relationship with Costa Rica.

I know we've been laying awake at night going, how's our relationship with Costa Rica?

When President Obama entered the White House, he set out to mend fences in the region in hopes of inaugurating a new era of global cooperation.

Leading that charge charge on that front was Joe Biden, who has long-standing ties to the region from his tenure leading the Senate Foreign Relations Committee.

Costa Rica?

I mean, you're leading the Foreign Senate Relations Committee, and

Costa Rica is even on your radar?

Shortly after the new administration took office, Frank Biden began scouting real estate opportunities in Costa Rica.

A lawyer by training, Frank was undeterred by his complete lack of background in international development.

This is such a common thread in the Biden story, isn't it?

It's people doing things overseas with no experience and no

prospect for success.

Yes.

Yet they all work out so well.

Right.

Because they're Americans.

They have the can-do Biden spirit.

They're just lunchbox Joes.

Middle-class Joe?

Middle-class Joe's.

Is it middle-class Frank?

It's middle-class Frank.

Is it lunchbox Frank?

It sure is.

Wow.

When you open up your lunchbox, you're like, I got a Frank in there.

It's fantastic.

And he gets the job done.

Well,

actually, no, he doesn't get the job done, but he's in there swinging.

Shortly after the new administration took office,

Frank Biden began scouting real estate opportunities in Costa Rica.

Schweitzer notes: despite the professional and personal handicaps, business opportunities somehow were plentiful, plentiful for Frank, especially after his brother paid a visit to the country.

Just months after Vice President Joe Biden's visit in August, Costa Rica News announced a new multilateral partnership to reform real estate in Latin America.

The head of this, Frank Biden, and a developer named Craig Williamson.

They have a newly planned resort, is what it said.

The venture, officially sold to investors and the public, as an opportunity to protect Costa Rica's breathtaking beauty, amounted to little more than decimating the country's natural wilderness to build a luxurious resort for wealthy foreigners.

In real terms, Frank's dream was to build in the jungles of Costa Rica thousands of homes, a world-class golf course, casinos, and an anti-aging center.

What the hell is an anti-aging center?

This family is creepy.

The Costa Rican government was eager to cooperate with the vice president's brother.

So here's the thing.

His business that he just started in this development, his first thing,

his business

only benefited from

$54

million

of

your tax money.

But that's all he took.

That's all he had, $54.

So

I don't know what anybody is really having a problem with.

Well, it was a loan.

You know, $54 million in loans.

And

a lot of times you're going to give loans to people who have no experience in the industry that they're jumping into.

Okay, so he did the

golf course thing, and that failed.

And he lost a lot of money.

But then he got right back up at the plate and he's like, you know what Jamaica needs?

Solar power.

And I'm sure somebody in his life went, went, Frank,

you know, you don't know anything about solar power.

Yeah,

so I'm an entrepreneur.

And they're like, yeah, but you didn't know anything about the Costa Rica golf course development and lost all of that guaranteed money from the U.S.

taxpayers.

I'm just playing Joe Biden here.

Right, right.

And I don't know if you're a really good bet.

I mean, somehow or another, you talked me into it because I really believed in you that you were going to make this and you were going to pay these American taxpayers back.

and you failed to do that.

I don't know if solar power is the right way to go.

Somehow or another, Frank convinced his brother for another $6.5 million in taxpayer-backed loans

on a solar company.

And we all know how that solar company is doing today.

Oh, it's huge.

It's no, it failed.

No, it failed.

Huh.

But

it was only,

in the end, it was only a $47.5 million loan.

That's it.

That's it.

Just the $47.5 million.

See, here's the thing.

I want to know, because you just kind of described an extensive vetting process with these projects.

Yeah, yeah, sure.

Do you really think that much vetting went on?

Because we know with Hunter Biden, the only vetting that went on was, I hope you know what you're doing.

Well, that's because there's one question that Joe Biden asked Hunter Biden.

Right.

That's because he didn't feel he had to.

I hope you know what you're doing.

You seen your uncle Frank?

You know what I mean?

Right.

Two failed businesses.

Now you're going into a business.

You don't even speak the language.

And I don't mean technical language.

I mean the language.

And

I hope you know what you're doing because look at your washed out, you know, probably on the road to be an alcoholic, you know,

uncle, stupid brother of mine who's just lost $54 million of taxpayer money right into his pocket.

No, I don't know.

Frank's history.

Is Frank's history as

problematic as Hunter's history is, though?

I mean, or is he just a failed business guy?

Well, I think failed business.

How many hookers has he knocked up this week?

I don't know if he's ever knocked up a hooker while he was with his

brother's widow, who he divorced his wife.

to be with

and then got a hooker pregnant.

I don't know if that runs in the family that close but seemingly wild success

does

well and when i say success i mean

they walk out with a lot of money right oh yeah of course the businesses fail the important things right yeah so it's good to know that the biden family is doing so well uh all right

now

i present to you the Probably the most important and favorite portion of the show.

We get letters and they say, Glenn, what are the latest identity threats?

And I'll say, you got to wait for the next update.

Well, it's finally here.

Over 26 million customers have their DNA information and databases maintained by DNA testing companies.

Good lord is my name on this.

But some of these companies might be vulnerable to data breaches as any other company, and your DNA information might be a tempting target for hackers who could sell this information on the dark web.

You gotta be kidding me.

Hasn't happened yet.

That's the good news.

But you could worry about it happening or you could just get lifelock.

Lifelock, see, I've got this, detects a wide range of identity threats, including the DNA thing, huh?

And the agents work to fix them if there is a problem.

Somebody opening a new account in your name, selling bits of your personal information on the dark web, these and other crimes are things you don't need in your life and you don't need to worry about.

You need somebody else to worry for you.

No one can, like the house thing, like honey, I don't know if Lifelock can protect you from the crimes against your home that have been perpetrated by your own children.

I tried to stop it the whole time.

Just couldn't hold the floodgates back.

But anyway, they can help you if you have threats to your identity.

Join now and save up to 25% off your first year by using promo code Beck.

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We break for 10-second station ID.

Hello, Stu.

It's good to have you here.

Thank you so much.

It's good to have you here.

I'm very excited to be here.

Yes, are you?

It's impeachment day.

It is.

It is.

It's the day, you know, they're going to have.

We're going to get to hear a lot about voting on amendments to see what kind of evidence can be put into the trial.

And then tomorrow, they're going to start talking, they're going to start the trial supposedly, and they're going to do two sessions of 12 hours.

And so they're going to end every night at like 1 a.m.

Yeah, why start?

You know, why start when people are awake?

Well, this is the complaint of the Democrats who claim that the reason they're doing it this way is to bury much of the evidence after everyone's asleep, which I don't know.

I mean, the arguments are going to go on long into the evening, and most people probably aren't going to tune into them.

I got news news for you, Democrats.

No one's tuning in anyway.

People are not interested in this.

I actually am because I'm into history.

I actually am.

Yeah, I mean, I don't find it to be all that interesting.

I mean, look, this is a blatantly partisan thing, and the Spounders were smart enough to set the bar high enough in the Senate that it was almost impossible to get a conviction.

I mean, there's never been one in U.S.

history.

We've been around for a while.

So this one's also not going to be one.

So we make a big deal about impeachment because it's generally speaking rare.

But what does it mean?

To get 50% of the House to vote on something is no big parlor trick.

Look, let me give you the most compelling argument to pay attention to this as possible.

Okay.

Okay.

It rarely happens.

I didn't.

Okay, so let me give you the comparison in real life.

We don't know how long your grandma's going to be with us.

I mean,

you should go to see your grandma.

Okay.

Because she might not be with us very much longer.

Okay, yeah, sure.

Okay, that's the only reason.

Why?

We don't know how much longer this republic is going to last.

You should watch.

You should be there when it takes its last gasps.

Ah, okay.

Okay.

Yeah, because

life support is on.

Yeah, and if we make it through, hey, you saw a bit of history that not a lot of people have seen before.

In fact, no one has ever seen the American Republic act like this before.

It is.

So it's like

you're the first man on the moon.

It is completely insane.

I mean, the founders talked about this as being, eventually it will be a partisan process and it will go through this, but that's why there's 67, you know,

votes needed in the Senate.

I mean, listen to Chuck Schumer talk about this.

We played that clip yesterday.

I mean, Schumer's like, look, eventually, if you if you go after Bill Clinton, the Democrats are going to come back and just do this for you know pure partisan reasons.

And here he is leading the charge.

Here it is.

But it's him.

And remember, he's right.

Remember, the vast right-wing conspiracy

took hold because they've been after this president, Bill Clinton, since even before he was elected.

This has been their goal the whole time.

Really?

Does that seem like now?

Is this a fast left-wing conspiracy?

All right.

So

I had a DeLorean.

Okay.

And the problem is, every time I got up to 88 miles an hour, I traveled back to

2008, which is not a a year I wish to repeat.

And so I just,

so I went in and I said, hey, can you, is this covered with Car Shield?

And they said, no.

But then I got into the car, went back to 1988, and I just changed a couple of the people there at Car Shield.

Then I went back in time to the dealership, and they were like, of course we cover your time machine.

Of course we do.

It's a DeLorean.

So if you have something that's not covered, just call me up.

I got the DeLorean.

Car Shield makes the process of fixing your car for a covered repair amazingly simple and you don't need a time machine all you have to do is just go to carshield.com your car i don't care if it has 5 000 150 000 miles on it car shield will take that and ease your pain when you have that check engine light go off you don't have to worry about it carshield.com promo code back deductible may apply go to blazetv.com use the promo code glenn and you can save 10 bucks all the stuff that you need to know on impeachment, tonight at five.

Oh yeah.

Oh yeah, dog.

Welcome to the program, Mr.

Pat Gray from Pat Gray Unleashed, the podcast that you can hear wherever you get your podcast, or you can grab it at Blazetv.com.

And don't forget to subscribe to the YouTube channel as well.

Oh, that is so great.

Yeah, yeah.

Thank you for that reminder.

No, you're welcome.

You're welcome because I know you've been forgetting.

There was a little post-it note, and it was empty, and I'm like, what is supposed to be on?

Well, I know you were writing it on your hand every day, like Tom Steyer writes that weird little thing that he does every single day.

Wait, wait, what is Tom Steyer?

Oh, Tom Steyer draws these little crosses on his his hand every day.

The little T's, four of them.

Why?

In like a tic-tac-toe square kind of thing.

Why?

Well, because it reminds him to tell the truth.

Obviously.

Are you guys stupid?

You don't do the little T's for truth to remind you to tell the truth every day?

How do you tell the truth ever then?

Wasn't that an episode?

Why do you just naturally tell the truth?

Wasn't that

ridiculous?

Oh, boy.

Wasn't that an episode of like Sherlock or one of those shows where they wrote things all over them, all over their face and everything?

Does anybody remember that?

What was it?

A movie or something?

Vaguely, yeah.

Yeah, I remember something about that.

Yeah, I got to find out what that is because we should compare pictures.

These Democrats, this is the weirdest group of people that have ever run for anything, ever.

I mean, they're all just freaks.

They really are.

They really are.

But you know what?

I have put them into

a list.

I'm going to share it at the top of the hour.

I'm going to put it into a list that will compare

they think and they see this field like we saw the field of Democrat, Republicans in 2016.

Really, you think so?

Yeah, I do.

I do.

And I'm going to make that case.

And I'll show you.

I'll compare the.

It's the same.

It's the same.

In their mind, it's the same.

And we have to understand it from their point of view.

They're just crazy.

But

the first step to recovery is admitting admitting that.

Really, just admit it.

Right.

I mean, if you put yourself inside the person who believes they have bugs under their skin, what does the world look like?

Right.

It's a different one.

It's a different world.

It's a different world.

They're going to die.

Differently.

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

So, Pat.

So the rally yesterday, the piles of dead bodies.

Oh, my God.

Horrific.

Was it a horror or what?

Hang on just a second.

Let's listen to what the press said.

Okay.

Here's the montage of what the press said about this rally and what was coming to Virginia.

Authorities in Richmond are on high alert.

It could be a tense date.

Several hate groups, supposedly some white nationalists.

White nationalists.

White nationalists.

White nationalists.

White nationalist groups.

White supremacists.

White supremacists.

White supremacists.

White extremists.

This entire rally stands in opposition to the meaning of this day.

Virginia on the edge.

How concerned are you that there might be some people in this crowd that may want to get violent?

There's certainly a lot of concern here.

Raising fears of a dangerous confrontation.

It could be violence.

And there is real concern there about what the intention is behind this.

There's a lot of concern about the potential for violence.

It could spark violence.

Tensions high in Virginia.

It may cause violence there.

North I'm clearly trying to avoid another Charlottesville in Charlottesville.

Could see a repeat of what we saw in 2017 in Charlottesville.

Similar to what we saw in Charlottesville.

Horrible 2017 Charlottesville disaster.

You look at what happened in Charlottesville.

The two sides clashed in Charlottesville.

Men walk through the Capitol in Virginia carrying weapons of war.

Many demonstrators are, in fact, heavily armed.

Heavily, heavily armed.

Heavily armed.

Look at the gear.

What is this all about?

Militia groups.

Armed militia.

These militia groups.

Far-right militia.

Militias.

Militia groups.

Far-right extremists.

Extremists.

Extremists.

Look, those threats which caused the governor to call for a state of emergency have simply not emerged.

The police are very clear in saying that they have not had a single arrest during this rally.

Thank you.

At least CNN told the truth at the end.

Yeah, they did.

At the end?

At the end.

Yeah, they smeared them for about a week.

But then at the end, they did do that one report where they're like, hey, nothing happened.

You know what's crazy is

the reports were not a single arrest.

The police were not out in force because I think the police knew.

The police knew who these people were.

So the police were not out in force.

And the quote,

crazy radical militia groups, the white supremacists.

White supremacists brought trash bags and cleaned up after themselves.

That's just like those Nazis to try to trick you into thinking that they're not litter bugs.

You know they are.

I was shocked.

I was shocked at the number of Nazi armbands yesterday.

Oh my gosh.

Yeah, they were all invisible, but I think that's even worse.

Well, of course.

They made it like that.

And then when Adolf Hitler got up and he started, I thought the guy was dead.

And he introduced Eichmann.

Oh, my God.

Oh, man.

Those weren't.

Nobody heard it or saw it.

But that makes it worse.

I think it does, Pat.

I really do.

I do.

And you know what?

These Nazis

liars.

They are so insidious.

They all pretend like they all say, oh, I was against the Nazis.

I have nothing to do with the Nazi Party.

Right.

You know what I mean?

Wink, wink.

Right.

Yeah.

Right.

And so they're denying all of that stuff every single day.

So they say things like, we're against them.

Hey, we're just constitutionalists.

We're for small government.

We just, we care about everybody's rights.

Sure.

That's what the founders said, too.

Yeah.

And then what did they do?

They had slaves.

That's what they did.

Okay.

And they fomented revolutions.

Thank you.

So these Nazis.

Even though they don't appear to be Nazis, they speak out against Nazis.

They fought wars against Nazis.

Their silence, their silence, their silent support of Nazis.

Their silence is deafening.

It's worse.

It's deafening.

And worse.

It's worse than what MSNBC said.

Worse.

Because there's no sign of it.

There's no sign of it.

Everybody was pretending the money.

Which makes everybody relax.

Right.

And then what happened?

And then they got you.

Yeah, they're worse.

Right where they want you.

Worse than MSA.

It's worse.

It's much worse.

Basically, where they are.

That's where the media is.

Basically, it is at this point.

They're hiding it.

They're hiding it.

They're hiding it.

Everybody knows that dog whistle that they blew yesterday.

Thank you.

Well, dogs know it.

People can't hear dog whistles.

No, that's a weird word.

But all the racist dogs, they were all there.

You see how many German shepherds were there?

How many white dogs were there?

A lot.

Right.

A lot of them.

Yeah.

And I will say, it was nice to see the media a year after the Covington incident really learn their lessons

over incidents like this.

They did learn their lesson.

Learn their lesson.

They know.

You'll notice it even though.

Don't type things that aren't real.

Don't do it because you'll get burned.

In fact, you'll have to pay millions of dollars in lawsuits.

Right, potentially.

Like CNN did.

And CNN paid that.

Nobody else has paid that.

Who is the one that came out immediately and went, hey, these weren't ASIS?

It was all peaceful.

they were great.

CNN.

Now they can smear leading up, but as soon as there was no evidence, that's a nice little explanation for why they would have done that.

Exactly right.

Huh?

Thank you, Sandman.

Yeah, Nick Sandman was.

I mean, that's a brave little mistake.

That's a brave kid.

Brave kid.

Bring us.

I feel like it's more like enter Sandman when CNN's looking at it.

They're like, oh no, here he comes.

This is, I mean, it is a pretty amazing development.

I mean, a year ago, here they are trashing this kid who's standing in his place.

And they went.

Doing nothing.

Nothing.

And it was just, I will say, the Washington Post was worse than CNN.

There were a couple of organizations that actually went further than CNN, but still they.

But not as far as the Nazis.

No, not that far.

Of course not.

The Nazis yesterday, you mean?

Yeah, the invisible Nazis.

They didn't say a thing during that whole San Man thing.

They were like pretending like, hey, I don't think this is fair.

That's worse

than what the Washington Post did.

It is much worse.

Invisible Nazis has got to be one of the worst things

in the world.

Because you wouldn't even know they were.

The concentration camps that these people are not building right now.

It's worse.

Right.

Because that just means they're due to build more Nazi concentration camps.

When they start building them,

there'll be everywhere.

It's all built up inside of them.

They think they have us.

But we are on to them.

On to them.

Thank you, CNN.

Thank you for opening our eyes.

Can you believe all those people who were armed to the teeth?

And they were.

A lot of them were.

You know, they had AR-15s.

Somebody brought a 50-cal.

Yeah.

And it shows that, gosh, you could actually have a gun and not shoot somebody with that.

Wait a minute.

You could have a weapon of war, a.50 caliber machine gun, not use it?

Not use it.

Weird.

Weird.

I didn't see that coming no

yeah they didn't see a few things coming

they didn't see a few things coming but uh

well the good news is they don't have to cover this they did their damage now they can move right on to the impeachment trial thank goodness you know what i mean yes where they can talk about these extremists oh these just radical extremists uh that are are trying to

take the country back from whom?

From whom?

The black man?

The orange man.

They're trying to take it back from the orange man.

Is that what it is?

Yes, the orange man in the White House.

Wow.

Nothing worse than an orange man in a White House.

Although I do like dream sickles, and that kind of sounds like a dream sickle.

It kind of does.

It does.

Orange man, White House.

I'm in.

Now,

do you think the Senate will vote to do the witnesses?

Are we going to end this thing quicker, like in two weeks wrapped up, or is this a months-long process?

It's not going to be a months-long process.

I do think that there's a chance that they vote yes.

They only need four Republicans, though there's no indications yet that Mitt Romney.

Romney's not even the one they're talking about.

They're talking about Murakowski and Collins and Lamar Alexander.

Romney.

But that's only three.

If you don't have Romney in that, I don't think he's been saying he's going to.

I don't think he can afford to.

I don't think he's going to always make the wrong choice.

Although he can't afford to.

He can't afford to.

I'm not a massive Mitt Romney fan, but he has not been...

Other than just generally speaking, Romney speak, he has not been outspoken and saying, I'm going to, you know, we need to trial.

It's worse.

It's where he's worse because he's not saying it.

He's not saying anything.

Oh, my God.

That does.

That makes it worse.

You're right.

He's an invisible vote for witnesses.

I'm just telling you.

He may very well vote for it, but you only need four.

He will.

will.

Even if it's just in his own.

Even if he doesn't, that's worse.

Worse.

Because he sold us out and then sold himself out on top of it.

Bad.

Yep.

Bad.

Yep.

All right.

That is bad.

Wow.

Right?

You know he wants to, but then he won't.

So he's a double sell-out.

All right.

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This is the Glimbeck program.

Welcome to the program.

We're just,

you know, this Prince Harry, is it Prince Harry that married Markle, Merkel, Markle, whatever her name is?

Yes, okay, it's Harry.

So, you know, Harry is leaving.

If you watch the crown,

it all of a sudden really makes sense to you.

This is like three generations in the, in the making, him leaving the family.

It was his great uncle who abdicated for love.

And,

you know, it was a mess when

he left and abdicated, the abdicated, the family just treated him horribly.

It's a really bad family.

And then

he, when, according to the crown at least, which is based in reality and fact, historic fact,

he

has the family

manipulating a relationship with Camilla Parker before she's bowls.

And she's

set up as somebody that they just want him to have a dalliance with, so he'll forget something else.

And so they set it up, and he falls in love, and so does she.

But she's married.

And it's really, really ugly.

and the the family is the family arranges all of the uh the marriage uh for camilla and gets everything back together and puts it all together so he will not have anything to do with her but he's actually in love and at the time that he's falling in love he's meeting with his dying uncle who was the king that abdicated for love and he's saying

Leave this.

Love is the only thing that matters.

Don't let them push you around.

Well, they do.

He marries Diana because of all the family pressure, and he never does it.

But now, Diana and Prince Charles' son,

he does it.

And you can see it if you're watching the crowd.

You see this, and you're like, wow,

that kid is brave.

Really brave.

Yeah, no, it sounds really good.

I'm not a big Royals follower, but I know you've been speaking highly of this series.

I love this series.

I mean, it has, you know, the first two seasons with Winston Churchill are unbelievable just great i'm excited about mcmillions the new

the new documentary coming to hbo well that was the uh corrupt uh game that

yeah yeah which i'm really i'm fascinated to watch and i've decided this is my ultimate way delivery system for television now i only want to watch limited series this is the way to do it like they are there's six episodes of this and then it's over There's not like 9,000 episodes, and it's not like, you know, only one little thing where they don't tell you the whole story.

That like six to ten episode thing is such a nice little sweet spot because you can watch the whole thing in a relatively short period of time, and then it's over.

You don't have to wait another year.

Like, I'm waiting for Ozark for another year.

I've been waiting forever.

I mean, I want it to start and then I want it to end and be over.

Leave me alone.

That's for healthy people.

That's true.

For those of us who just can't stop eating, I need season after season after season.

I mean, some of us, you know, are foodaholic, alcoholic,

you know, seriesaholics.

We have to be fed constantly.

You're all three, which is an interesting combo.

It is.

It is.

Some people would claim, like my wife.

You take everything to the extreme.

What?

Listening to Glenn Beck.

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This is the Glembeck program.

I think,

I think, I think I have found

a way to relate to Democrats.

And I don't know, but I think I understand what they're doing right now.

And that's saying a lot because I don't even know if most of them know what they're doing right now.

But I think what they're going through right now

is the same thing, except in the exact opposite direction that the Republicans went through in 2016.

And let me explain in one minute.

This is the Glenn Beck program.

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Okay, I want to show you that what we're seeing is,

yes, it is a comedy TV show.

What we're seeing happening on the Democratic side is a comedy TV show.

Now, let me show you.

This is an internal video from the New York Times editorial board with Bernie Sanders

speaking to the editorial board on why they should endorse him, because

this is who he is.

Listen to this amazing audio.

Look, I don't tolerate bullshit terribly well.

And I come from a different background than a lot of other people who run the country.

I'm not good at backslapping.

I'm not good at pleasantries.

If you have your birthday, I'm not going to call you up to congratulate you and say you love me and you write nice things about me.

That's not what I do.

Never have.

And I, you know, I guess I take that as a little bit of a criticism, self-criticism.

I've been amazed at how many people respond to, happy birthday.

Oh, Bernie, thanks so much for calling.

You know, it works.

It's just not my style.

You know, I try to stay focused on the important issues facing working families in this country.

Stop, stop, stop, stop.

Now, I'll show you that this is a TV show.

I want you to play that audio again.

And, Sarah, watch for my cue.

on when to start it and it'll all fall together.

Go ahead, start the Bernie

Look, I don't tolerate bulls terribly well.

And I come from a different background than a lot of other people who run the country.

I'm not good at backslapping.

I'm not good at pleasantries.

If you have your birthday, I'm not going to call you up to congratulate you, say you're lovely, and you write nice things about me.

That's not what I do.

Never have.

And

I take that as a little bit of a criticism, self-criticism.

I've been amazed at how many people respond to, happy birthday.

Oh, Bernie, thanks so much for calling.

It works.

It's just not my style.

I mean,

this is Larry David.

It is Larry David.

You can't write that unless you're Larry David.

And he's just as frustrated and miserable and

crazy.

It's the same character.

It's crazy.

Okay, but that's not the character they want.

Okay, they don't want Larry David.

They want Donald Trump.

Who does?

The Democrats.

I have missed a news story.

What do you want?

No, no, no.

They want a Donald Trump.

They want somebody who speaks to the American people, just says it like it is on their version of it.

What evidence do you have of this?

They want to beat Donald Trump.

So they're looking for someone.

They want their own Donald Trump.

They want their own Donald Trump that can box people out, you know, punch them in the face, get them to shut up and sit down, that can wield power like Donald Trump does.

Okay?

That's what they want.

They want that kind of personality.

Okay, so let's look.

As I was looking at the

Democratic field the other day, and

I started thinking, okay, so what's really going on here?

How can we possibly relate

to the people that are

on the

stage?

Because they're all weirdos and freaks.

And

is it just me?

No, it's not.

So I thought, what is it that they are actually,

what is it that they're actually looking for?

They have Joe Biden, Bernie Sanders, Elizabeth Warren, Pete Buddha Judge, Amy Klobuchar, and Michael Bloomberg, also still in the race, Andrew Yang, and Tom Steyer.

Well, you're forgetting about Michael Bennett, Tulsi Gabbard, John Delaney, and Duval Patrick.

Yeah, sure, sure.

I am.

Yeah, okay.

See?

Just like the rest of them.

But

let's just take the ones that they have.

What they're doing is what the Republicans were doing in 2016.

There was a chance to have a new party and a new direction.

Okay.

And if you look at all of the players here,

you will see that the same players just on the opposite side

were in 2016, except for one.

Joe Biden.

Who's Joe Biden?

Joe Biden is the establishment.

He's more of the same.

He's what everybody has grown to go, I'm sick of.

Joe Biden is Jeb Bush, except at 80.

Okay?

If he was

Jeb Bush's age, He might have a chance, but he's the same guy.

Bernie Sanders, they hope, in some ways, is Donald Trump because they're just looking for somebody that can beat him.

And he's not Donald Trump.

He's

in 2016, he's Rand Paul, but he's more Ron Paul because he had that big following that only cared about Ron Paul.

And they didn't care about anything else.

In fact, they wanted to burn the rest of the situation down.

You know, the party can go burn itself to the ground.

They didn't care.

That's Ron Paul.

And because they're ideologues,

they just have, you know, Mao's little red book, We Had the Little Pocket Constitution.

It's Rand Paul or Ron Paul.

Elizabeth Warren,

like Ron Paul was too extreme for some people.

But they liked the fact that he was constitutional and, you know, he believed in in all of these things yada yada yada but he was too far you wanted somebody that was more

you know wonky or you know just could could operate in the system without burning it down that's elizabeth warren so elizabeth warren is ted cruise

just the opposite side all right ted cruise is the guy who would go you're not casting the movie

like you're casting the movie of the republican primary with the democratic candidates because they kind of have an equivalence.

There's an equivalence.

There's an equivalence.

They're not exact, and they're certainly ideologically on the opposite ends.

But Ted Cruz was Ron Paul, except he wasn't going to burn the system down.

He had a plan, and he was going to

execute this.

Well, he was methodical.

I can see that.

Those are fair so far.

Right.

So you have Elizabeth Warren as Cruz.

Pete Buddha Judge, I'm not really comfortable, but I think he's kind of like Marco Rubio.

Yeah.

He's less experienced than Marco Rubio, but you look at him and he's like, ah, he should win.

I mean, it's pretty good.

But

on paper, he's good.

Now, I kind of thought Rubio could be Kamala Harris, the on-paper candidate that should probably be better.

But she's dropped out.

Yeah.

Buddha Judge is the closest thing I think you have to Rubio.

Yeah.

And I don't think I don't have anybody clear-cut for Buddhajudge.

That's good.

I think you're right, though.

I think Rubio is a good example there.

Andrew Yang,

Carly Fiorina.

Okay, both tech entrepreneurs and tech entrepreneurs, somebody who speaks common sense.

You know, may not everybody on the other side is not going to agree with, but somewhat palatable to the other side at times.

Correct.

And somebody who's just like, can we just talk facts and figures here for just a second?

Can we just be rational human beings for a minute?

Generally, thought of smart, well-liked.

Correct.

Yeah, I get that.

All right.

Okay.

So you got me so far.

Amy Klobuchar.

seems like, you know, a normal human being,

but probably

not so much, you know,

kind of like John Kasich,

where you're kind of like, eh, okay.

But I went back and forth with John Kasich because I think, in a way, it could be Tulsi Gabbard.

Because they perceive

her the way we perceive John Kasich.

Just a total sellout.

But Mike Kasich was much more of a party

figure.

He was more of a Republican creature.

Gabbert's not all.

So Klobuchar is probably the right one.

Yeah, because Klobuchar, too, is one that occasionally seems palatable to the other side, which what people said about Kasich.

Kasich was the one candidate that the Democrats would say they wanted out of the entire field.

And probably Republicans might say the same thing about Klobuchar.

I I mean,

we talked to

Mike Lee when he was in here, and we said, hey, what do you think?

Who is of the Democrats that are running that you work with, who is the closest to the Constitution?

And he said, Klobuchar.

So, I mean, you can kind of see that.

Gabbard is, I think, likable in different ways in that she's standing up against the Democrats.

I think that's the main reason people like her.

Her policies are just not even remotely close to what a Republican would want.

There are some people on the right who are like her anti-intervention sort of policies.

So there's some alignment there, which there's not really any alignment.

This is not fair to say, you know, oh, well, who's the closest to

the Constitution in this field?

It's probably Amy.

You know, that's like having me, Tim Tebow, and a Tim Tebow and a Wino.

And which one's the closest to an astronaut?

I don't know, probably Tebow because he's in shape.

Right.

But other than that.

I think that's about the level

Nothing.

Right.

Nothing.

He struggled with it, to be fair.

Okay, yeah.

But I think the idea is that occasionally Klobuchar could, in theory, say something that is parallel to sane.

That's the only standard we're talking about here.

And I think the left would say the same thing about Kasich, right?

Kasich was a very boring, generic Republican that would say things that kind of felt good to the mainstream media, which is why he was the nice guy, right?

Trump was mean.

Cruz was mean.

Kasich was the nice guy.

He was the moderate.

And they do say that about Klobuchar when she's not pelting employees with food.

Which she's not nice.

As long as you don't work for her, she's very nice.

She's very nice.

And as warm as those winters she's grown accustomed to.

So Tulsi Gabbard, then

maybe

Ben Carson.

Yeah,

because he's totally kind of from out of the, not a normal Republican, right?

He came from a totally different background as Shabbat did.

She's very religious in her way.

He's very religious.

And I think, didn't he have some strange background?

They're uncommon.

There were reports on that, yeah.

Yeah.

And

they're both really nice.

They both kind of had a little bit of attention, but never really made a serious run.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

Possibly.

Okay.

Okay.

All right.

Now, Tom Steyer,

I put into the category of Chris Christie if power was money

in his day,

you know,

and if

because the only difference, Aaron.

This one feels like a reach to me.

Okay, it might be.

It might be, but here's what it is.

You know, no matter what they act like, you know, in your heart,

there's a lot of corruption going on there.

okay so you look at chris christie and you might be like ah it's funny and look at the fat man on the beach and whatever

um but it's all about power and yes you know there's a little corruption going on there maybe a lot and the same thing goes with tom styre he can he can write you know the little T's to remind him to tell the truth.

Nobody has to draw a T on their hand to remind them to tell the truth.

I wake up every day and write, don't be Satan on the back of my hand

just to remind myself.

Try try not to be satan get up every morning and try

reminder don't be satan

who does that usually it's easier yeah you don't you know unless you are satan i'm not satan look at my hand

he writes crosses on his hands and then he lights them on fire

right i mean it's kind of like chris christie it's like you know okay you know i mean i i it's a little bit of a reach because christie was you know a governor and they're coming from totally different backgrounds but i can see the similarities there.

Yeah, they both had power in their own way.

Yeah.

Both have power in their own way.

And both of them, you know, would close the bridge if they, if they, if they wanted to.

Oh, yeah, Steyer's closing the bridge.

Closing the bridge.

There's no doubt about that.

Right.

And Bloomberg is George Pataki.

Bloomberg is George.

Think of that.

Think of that.

I think Bloomberg's got a better chance of winning than George Pataki.

Yes, but they're both as lovable.

Pataki might be a little more lovable,

but they're the same kind of

New York politicians, certainly.

Anyway, I have a point to all of this, and I'll get to it in a second.

I'd love to hear your list as well, Stu.

But we'll get to that here in a second.

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We pause for 10 seconds.

Okay, so now think of this.

This is the way the Democrats are looking at this election.

Remember, last election,

they look at us as radicals and revolutionaries.

If you believe in the Constitution, you're a radical and revolutionary.

Why?

Because

if you believe that, you're dismissing the last 100 years.

And the last 100 years have been 100 years of progress.

Look how great things are now.

So 100 years of progress.

The progressives on both sides, the Republicans and the Democrats, remember progressives started with Theodore Roosevelt.

The progressives on both sides dismissed the Constitution and the Declaration of Independence a long time ago, 100 years ago.

And so we were seen as radicals that want to drag you back before Woodrow Wilson and Theodore Roosevelt.

Well, yes, because those are the American principles that have been distorted by the socialist movement in the Progressive Party early on.

So, yeah, we want to get rid of those because we don't believe those are progress.

That makes us a radical and revolutionary.

We're wanting to stick to our founding documents.

Their radicals and revolutionaries want to do the same thing, except it's Mao's little red book,

or it's, you know, the Communist Manifesto.

They see themselves as re-founders just as much as we did.

Except only one of us is truly an American idea.

The other is this European socialist, communist idea that it goes against everything America stands for.

This is why our radicals, one wraps themselves in the flag, because we are proud of America.

The other needs to destroy America.

Remember, Marx said at the end, America is the target because it will shed who it was.

It will shed its ugliness and its capitalism and its freedom.

And it will gain real freedom through this communist new order in the communist manifesto.

That's the radicals.

Then in the middle is the mushy stuff that we all rejected and they want to reject as well.

They just didn't have a Donald Trump step to the plate.

They don't know who can beat Donald Trump.

That's the problem.

They keep trying on another pair of Donald Trump shoes and none of them fit.

You're listening to Glenn Beck.

If you suffer from pain, you have inflammation.

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Oh, no, slow down, doc.

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That's

why don't you just shoot heroin into my veins?

It never did anything.

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Welcome to the Glendeck program.

Really glad that you're here.

Stu and I were just talking about this list that I made because

what you need to understand is

here's the main difference between the left and the right.

The right's radicals, like the media, media, made out, everybody who went to that Virginia rally yesterday, that's a radical, a revolutionary.

They're a danger because they all accept the progressive premise that we don't really have the Constitution and we don't run it like we used to run things.

And that's the point of our radicals is we need to get back to the Constitution.

So we have a right to privacy.

We have a right to life.

We have a right to speech.

We have a right to the Second Amendment, the Tenth Amendment, all the amendments.

That's our radical.

And they see them as radicals on the left because they've dismissed everything prior to 1900.

It's just nonsense.

It doesn't matter.

It's not relatable anymore.

What the progressive radical, the left radical, the difference here, is they're going back to 1858 and they're getting the Communist Manifesto and they're saying we need to fundamentally change America because America is a bad place.

So the Democrats don't have a uniting force.

The Republicans have a uniting force and that is we all love America.

We all love the Constitution.

Now, some of us...

Some of us want to adhere more to it than others, but none of us want to abolish the Constitution.

None of us think America is a bad place.

None of us think that, you know, we made mistakes, but we've been trying, and we're getting better all the time.

The Democrats, the regular Democrat in, you know, flyover country, I think the non-political ones, just the normal Democrat, believes the same thing about the country.

You know, I love the Constitution, but some of it might, you know, might want to change or whatever.

But I don't want to throw it out.

I don't want to throw our system out.

I love the flag.

I love our country.

I think we made some real mistakes that we don't, you know, necessarily admit to, but we're a good place.

We just need to fix it.

Where half of the Democrats believe that

and all of the Republicans generally believe that,

half of the Democrats don't love America.

And so you have this Joe Biden guy who's like, okay, well, okay, he loves America.

And I don't, you know, he's probably going to do some, you know, things that, you know, will increase welfare in the state and everything else, but I'm okay with that.

I just don't want to be with the radicals.

That's a split.

They have to decide.

Which one are they?

Which one are they?

And I think they are deciding, right?

Yeah.

The radical.

It's very possible a non

outward socialist wins this primary for them.

But I mean, they're making a statement as the party as to who they're putting in charge, right?

Correct.

Basically, Alexandria Casio-Cortez is running the party at this point.

They're all signing on to the Green New Deal and all this nonsense.

So they've made their intent clear in a long-term way.

And the only time they talk about women here.

Right.

And the only time that they don't talk about the Constitution, and the only time they do talk about the Constitution is times like impeachment, when it works to their advantage.

Exactly.

Just like the only time they care about your rights with your body is when it's abortion.

Yes.

When it's your doctor,

of course, obviously you can't.

No, the government's going to make those decisions.

Yes.

When it's every other topic, they don't care about individual liberty at all.

But on this one, they do.

They use these things when they need them.

Correct.

But I'm looking at your list, and I think I pretty much agree because you're comparing the 2020 Democratic field with the 2016 Republican field.

They're making the same kind of choices we were making.

Who are we?

So this is your list here, and I think I agree with all of them.

Let me give you one example.

Let me try to sell you on one difference.

Okay.

So you're saying Bernie Sanders Sanders is Rand Paul, and you kind of said more like the Paul family.

The Ron Paul,

better example.

But yeah, because he really had more of a cult following.

Yes.

Elizabeth Warren, Ted Cruz.

I think that's like pretty, you know, very conservative for Cruz, very liberal for Warren, still in the Senate, in the system a little bit, can work the system more than a Ron Paul or a Bernie Sanders.

Yeah, Ron Paul represented a revolution.

Bernie Sanders represents a revolution.

To Democrats,

Warren represents more of an evolution, right?

Same place, but you can do it without like, you know, blood in the streets, perhaps.

And the same thing with Ted Cruz.

He's just going to be able to put Ron Paul's, many of Ron Paul's things that Ron Paul's supporters would really like into place.

But it'll take you to the same place just without blood in the streets and blowing the thing up.

Pete Buttigieg, you had Marco Rubio, which it's growing on me, actually, because

here's the young, up-and-coming politician with promise

that the establishment seems to like a lot of, but never really could inspire a lot of passion.

Like Rubio never really connected with Republican voters.

He was the guy on paper, you might say, is the one who should win.

He's the guy in 2008 that would have swept

the nomination.

He would have swept the nomination.

And, you you know, in 2016,

Rubio looked for a while like the guy who had a good chance of winning.

And I think if you look at this field, I mean, Buttajege comes from

no status, right?

Like he's a mid-city mayor, where Rubio was a senator in Florida.

But generally speaking, if you looked at this field kind of on paper, you'd probably say Buddha Judge is a good idea for the Democrats, right?

I mean, he's young, he's well-spoken, he's smart, you know, there's a reason he's diverse.

Diverse, right?

The same thing you'd say with Rubio, right?

Like, he's diverse.

Yeah, has all those same characteristics.

Biden is Jeb Bush.

That one's a little problematic just because Bush faded so quickly.

And Biden has led this case the whole time.

Let me explain this.

Because

we had every single choice loved America.

So there was a whole bunch of them we could look at and go,

okay, if that guy drops, we can just go to the next one.

So Joe Biden, or Joe Biden, is like

really the only iconic guy that stands for the old establishment and, you know, still loves his country.

Everybody else is shades of loving their country and they start pretty gray, you know, and then quickly descend to black.

Where Jeb Bush, he didn't have to fight that battle.

So you lose Jeb Bush because you're just not an establishment guy.

Because really, I don't think the Democrats are establishment people either.

I don't think they actually want Joe Biden.

He's just the best one up there that represents steady as she goes.

Yes, and that was the idea with Bush.

The Bush administration was not remembered by Republicans as fondly as the Obama administration is for Democrats.

So there's a difference there.

And we should also point out, Jeb Bush did fade very quickly.

However, Biden might too.

I mean, he's leading now, but if he loses these first two states, who knows what happens?

So he might be gone early, too.

Klobuchar Kasich, I like that one a lot.

Gabbard Carson, I think, is

the right way to go.

Andrew Yang as Carly Fiorina, I think is a really, really good one.

Tom Steyer Chris Christie is a little bit of a reach, but I think it's because it's Klobuchar.

Because there's nobody.

There's no Steyer.

No, I mean, you'd have to go to some

Mr.

Potter from It's a Wonderful Life.

Yeah, there's not really a good fit there.

No.

The one I would kind of say I would like to, because you said Bloomberg was Pataki.

And again, like, Pataki was out of it immediately.

They have both New York politicians.

There's some similarities.

I know where you're going on that.

I think if there's a Trump in this race, it's Bloomberg.

And if you think about it this way, Bloomberg, obviously, they're both billionaires.

They're both businessmen.

You might think of Bloomberg as a politician, but remember, he was a businessman, turned politician.

The only thing he's ever done in politics was the mayor of New York, which is obviously a big gig.

He breaks with party orthodoxy relatively often.

He doesn't agree with

Trump

was against things like free trade and things like that.

The same thing with Bloomberg, where he'll embrace business, which makes Democrats very uncomfortable.

He's a wild card.

He can get himself on television.

I mean, he owns a television network, so it's pretty easy to get on.

But I mean, he can get himself on television.

Bloomberg, he's not to the

near the profile of Trump, but he's also going to spend a, you know, he's already spent hundreds of millions of dollars of his own money.

He is

a wild card in that no one can really predict where he's going.

He's not first.

Trump led the polls for a long time, and I don't think Bloomberg has near the chance of winning that Donald Trump did as far as the primary goes.

But Bloomberg is in fourth or fifth in a lot of these national polls.

And he is the guy coming in after these early states to try something that no one's ever tried before, where Trump was running a campaign with basically no infrastructure, trying something that no one has ever tried before.

I'm not saying this means that Bloomberg is going to win the nomination, but if there's someone close to Trump on the Democratic side, I think the profile is Bloomberg.

I think the profile is closer to Bernie Sanders.

Yeah, but it's not, it was never an ideological movement.

No, no, Trump.

I know that.

But neither is Bernie Sanders.

He is an ideological movement, but he is also Larry David.

He also does things, and you're like, I mean, who does that New York Times interview we just played where he's like, I don't send birthday cards?

I don't, you know, I'm not going to say happy birthday to you.

Why would I waste my time?

He just is raw and is perceived as honest.

I think, though, there's two ways you sound like that.

One is you are an ideologue like Sanders, or he doesn't care because he legitimately believes in socialism and doesn't care if he doesn't sound right.

The other way is when you have FU money.

That's Trump, and that's both Bloomberg.

Bloomberg does the same crap to people.

He's a guy who told a reporter at a party when a woman walked by that was dressed in a tight dress and he said, Look at the ass on her.

He said it to a reporter in the middle of a profile.

He is also the guy who took

an air conditioning unit from an apartment-style window and put it in his SUV

so when it was sitting out front, his car could be really cold without burning any fossil fuel.

Right.

So I could see Trump doing something like that.

I could do.

I could do.

And the thing is with Trump, and

one other similarity I would say is one thing with Trump is what he did break with party orthodoxy relatively often for a candidate that won up winning the nomination for sure.

However, the things he agreed with the party on, he really agreed with them on.

Things like the border, for example.

Look at Bloomberg.

Bloomberg has been the preeminent funder of anti-gun causes in the United States.

He has been the preeminent funder of

global warming causes in the entire United States.

He wouldn't burn fossil fuels in his car.

I'm not saying he's a consistent person by any means.

His personal character, right, is totally different than those things.

But he would be able to excite the base on big issues like that, even though he disagreed on things like taxes and business.

He would be able to get a lot of Democrats on board because he would stand up and say, basically, repeal the Second Amendment.

I mean, he'd be basically to that level of anti-gun talk.

He'd be basically to that level on global warming.

He would be the type of guy who would be like, we're doing an emergency the day I get into office.

I mean,

I'm not saying that he's a chance to win because it's the same profile.

He would be a guy,

same profile in in many ways,

except the stardom and unpredictability is what was attractive to many on Trump.

And as you were talking about that, that is also the Achilles heel of Donald Trump.

People like stability, and they're not sure that they can, you know, the Democrats don't find him stable at all.

Many Republicans don't find him stable.

You just never know what's going to happen next.

And that's the one thing that if he could excite the base, maybe he doesn't, he just is not a likable guy, though.

No, but I mean, that was a big complaint about Trump, too.

He never had high personal likability numbers.

Oh, no, he did.

The Trump, the that was the big complaint about Trump, is that he wasn't likable.

I mean, again, like...

He was a TV show star.

I know he was.

But I'll say this, too.

Look at his rallies.

I tend to keep coming back to the same thing.

A lot of people are saying, if they split four states, then Bloomberg has a chance to jump in.

I think the best chance for Bloomberg to win this thing, if there is one, is Sanders, Sanders, Sanders, Sanders.

If Bernie Sanders, let's say, sweeps those first four states, which isn't impossible, then the Democratic Party is going to be with that real decision: we have no one except Michael Bloomberg and his $2 billion,

or Bernie Sanders, a socialist.

We may lose with Bernie.

He's too far for me.

There's one option here.

The only one left is the guy with all the money

in these Super Tuesday states.

Let me just say this that we have to break.

Imagine if you had Ron Paul

as the candidate, the first four or five states, and then the Republicans said, we got to stop this guy.

Imagine what would happen.

Imagine what would happen to the party.

Imagine what would happen if they were in, say, Milwaukee

over the summer.

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You're listening to Glenn Beck.

This is the Glenn Beck program.

Next hour, I want to talk to you about a couple of things.

One is Michael Bloomberg's

money.

And what would you do?

Would you be running for president if you had his money?

I would not.

By the way, Glenn, we can now officially announce that no podcast in history has ever grown faster than Stew Does America.

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Well, you keep that up for the next 18 months.

I think we can do it.

I think we can do it.

Go to stewdoesamerica.com and subscribe on YouTube and podcasts and all that stuff.

And look, would I continue to do that if I had Bloomberg-type money?

Nope.

You don't even call to say goodbye.

Don't even call to say goodbye.

Don't call me.

Where's Stu?

You're listening to Glenn Beck.

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We have a

we have an interesting question.

Stu's already spent a good portion of his money.

I die, I don't think you're that's true.

That's a question.

We still have about 80, 90% left.

If we have Michael Bloomberg money, $54 billion,

what are you doing?

Are you going around asking for people's votes in Iowa?

I'm not.

Not even considering.

I'm not.

Now, Stu is like,

I'm just going to

disappear and have a Unibomber

cabin.

Nice one.

A nice cabin, though.

Right.

And I'll buy the Philadelphia Eagles.

Certainly.

I don't think I have a plan.

I don't.

Hmm.

The fusion of entertainment and enlightenment.

If you had $54 billion like Michael Bloomberg, $54 billion,

would you be schlepping around Iowa asking people for their votes today?

Because I don't think I would.

And

Stu definitely would not.

What would you do with $54 billion

besides, you know, beside running for president, which I don't think is on anyone's list except for Michael Bloomberg?

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So Michael Bloomberg has $54 billion.

Now I cannot imagine because I've watched others go through it.

I mean, there is nothing that will talk you out of running for president faster than following somebody around the country who's running for president.

It is a nightmare.

It's a hard life.

Oh, it's not only it's not only just a hard life of, you know, waking up into cities you don't know where you're at and just nonstop over and over again.

It's just so dishonest and dirty with the press and just awful.

I hated it.

Yeah, I mean, just because you're going from city to city, but they're not like, it's not like glamorous travel, right?

Like you're traveling back roads to little halls where you're talking to 40 people and

you go and go and go and you give the same speech over and over and over and over and over and over again.

If you mess up one little thing, it's all over the world.

If you do everything right, no one notices.

You know, it is really a, you know, and you're going in and out of like every back room and they've got like, you know, three-day-old Danishes that that's what you're eating.

And yeah, there's nothing that will cure you from hotel food faster than going in the back way of hotels.

We do that all the time.

And I can name the hotels.

that I still am comfortable eating at.

You walk through the back kitchens and the back hallways and they are nasty.

Nasty.

And I will say a lot of these people are used to the kind of the nice life, right?

And then they go to, I understand it, like a holiday inn.

Remember, we stayed at the place where they had the pancake printer.

I loved that.

In the lobby, where you just

pressed a button and a pancake popped out.

Oh, God.

They don't have a pancake printer.

I love that hotel.

I love that thing.

I want one of them in my house.

It was a Holiday Inn Express, if I'm not right.

I think it was.

It was.

And legitimately, you just pressed a button, and in about 40 seconds, a pancake popped out.

It was a nice, hot, fantastic, delicious pancake.

I want one in my house.

Why don't we have one?

A holiday.

No, a holiday in Express.

I want one in my house.

So it's a different life from these

politicians that are used to nice hotels in Washington, D.C., and they're traveling all over the country, getting nice speeches and everything else.

That goes away for these tourists.

The one thing I did notice that while you're on campaign is

you do get to see America.

You know, that's the one thing that the Electoral College ensures.

These people have to go out to the farmlands.

They have to go out to places and spend a lot of time with people who would never be in their circle.

Never.

No.

And it's really good.

Do you ever see Hillary Clinton at any state fair?

Any state fair?

No.

Right.

Never.

Never.

I don't think she'd allow her private jet to fly overloads.

Right, right.

No, people stinked on that.

No.

So it requires them, because of the Electoral College, to go into places where they would never, ever go and really have to spend time living the life that they live.

And I think that's healthy in some ways.

Oh, I think it's definitely healthy.

But it's not something that if I have Michael Bloomberg money, I'm interested in

participating in.

I mean, Steyer's doing this.

Now, Steyer does not have Bloomberg money.

He has a couple billion dollars, which is not, you know, nothing, right?

I mean, it's basically making a poverty level.

$10

It basically poverty levels, right, is what we're talking about.

For the Democrats, yeah, kind of, yes.

But he is, and by the way, his ad spending has taken a nosedive the last few days.

People are starting to wonder whether Steyer's decided, maybe this is not going to happen.

You know, maybe my money is not going to be able to buy this election, which, of course, is what conservatives have been saying forever.

That's not the way it works.

Plus,

he's totally outshined by Bloomberg anyway on that front.

So

he's in trouble.

But Steyer has been actually going to these early states and trying to campaign.

And that's not something, even if I have Tom Steyer money that I'm interested in.

Now, if I've got Bloomberg money, there's no way I'm doing it.

Now, Bloomberg money.

Well, one way to get Bloomberg money is to be the president of the United States.

As soon as you're president of the United States, except for Donald Trump, you watch.

Donald Trump's not going to be out making all these speeches and, you know, giving all these

because he's not in the popular crowd.

It's true.

He'll still do well, I think.

No, he will.

And he did not like.

I mean, look, do you remember when the Obamas were like, we still have student debt?

Yeah.

And then they're like, they just bought an $11 or $15 million house on Martha's Vineyard eight years later.

That's a pretty decent eight years.

Netflix is like, here, take a billion dollars to make documentaries or whatever they're doing with that.

I mean, it's

just a payment.

It is.

Right?

It's just a payment.

It is.

With Bloomberg money, though, you don't have to care about that.

You don't care what your life is like afterwards.

Your life is set.

He's got $52, $54 billion.

He's the ninth richest man in the world already.

That's a different level than even a Tom Steyer, right?

So what do you do?

All of a sudden, you wake up and you find out that you're related to Michael Bloomberg.

He just died of, you know, SARS or whatever that Chinese offers.

He's got that Chinese thing.

I don't know how the Chinese keep getting sick.

They all wear surgical masks.

How do you keep getting sick?

There's a chicken and an egg issue here you might want to consider.

It's like, you're all wearing surgical masks all the time.

The sickness may come from the surgical mask.

But anyway,

you know,

what do you do if you are.

If he dies, he's your rich uncle, you're the only relative to Michael Bloomberg, and he's left you $54 billion.

You don't even call me to say I'm not coming in.

You'd never, I mean, you might see my face on television if I get unlucky.

But yes, you're right.

I would do anyone call.

Maybe I have someone.

We wouldn't.

No, wait, wait, wait.

I'm going to amend that.

Until you actually got the money, you would be coming in every day and you wouldn't tell a soul.

No way.

No one would know.

Your best friends wouldn't know.

Your wife probably wouldn't know.

You would just be totally silent.

Then you'd have it.

Once you had the money,

ghosts.

Oh, yeah.

To a lot of people, you know.

I mean, maybe I give a call just to kind of laugh.

You know, now the kids would come along.

Kids would come along.

Kids would come along.

But would they be with the help now?

Well, of course, someone's got to take care of them.

It's not going to be me.

I got $54 billion.

Okay, I got it.

I got it.

It's not going to be working anymore.

Right.

Patting them on the head.

Nice to see you guys.

Night night.

Now, of course, my first call would not be to you or my wife or anybody else, but Jeffrey Lurie, owner of the Philadelphia Eagles.

And of course, that would be immediately purchased for any price.

So I'd probably add about, I mean, it's valued at $3 billion.

He's not going to sell it to me at $3 billion because, well, because

he could sell it to anybody for $3 billion, and he's not selling it, right?

So I'd appreciate that.

Didn't you have to go through the repel thing?

Oh, yeah, they'd approve me.

Certainly.

They would not approve you.

Oh, they would.

They would hate you because you were...

Aren't you the guy who worked with Glenn Beck?

No.

I've destroyed.

Oh, you know what?

No.

You have $54 billion.

You can't do it.

I'd spend a billion erasing you from the planet so no one knows I ever knew you.

What happened to my studios?

They were here yesterday.

There's a new apartment building where my radio studio was.

But yeah, I mean, so if you own something that's worth $3 billion and you can sell it at any time, like you have nice things, right?

You could sell those things for whatever their market value is.

You don't do that because you're valuing that thing more than the market does, right?

You know, I have like if I've got so how much are you willing to pay for the Philadelphia Eagles?

Out of $54 billion, how much are you willing to give up?

I mean, well, let's just say you're going to negotiate, but what is, what's it worth?

John Huntsman taught me this, John Huntsman Sr.

Never pay more, not than what it's worth, never pay more than what it's worth and what it's worth to you.

Right.

That's very important.

Right.

I mean, 54.

I think he meant that that number should always be lower.

Oh, really?

Because I think it's certain things I would value more than others, right?

That's what the market is.

So I would value the Philadelphia Eagles certainly more than almost anyone.

Right, but he was talking about, he was talking about business.

Remember, it's still business.

Like, I asked him one time, when does a Gulfstream jet ever

make sense economically?

And he said, oh, it never does.

Now, he's like a billionaire.

Yeah.

Never does.

Then why did you get one?

Because my time with my family is more valuable than the money.

Okay, exactly.

Right.

Right.

Like, I mean, there's never a way of, you know, a vacation is worth paying for.

Any vacation.

It's not worth it financially.

However, you are buying an experience.

You're buying something you might do.

So you're buying a two, four, six, eight billion dollar experience with the Eagles?

Well, first of all, it's going to generate lots of revenue.

However, yeah, I mean, you start getting north of $10 billion.

I start getting a little nervous, probably.

Nervous.

54 billion.

Don't tell Jeffrey Laurie this because if I do get the 54 billion, he's going to have a very good negotiating position.

However, like, yeah, I want it.

And I'll pay any price, basically, right?

I mean, first of all, I only need to get 51% of it.

So, I mean, I might even be able to

be able to skimp a little bit.

I can't think of anything that I would pay a billion dollars for.

That would mean so much to me that I would, I mean, I would start, like, for instance, I could see myself starting a town, going out someplace, doing what Walt Disney did, what he tried to do with Epcot, and say, Nevada, I want this property and it's mine.

I can build whatever I, none of your little rules.

I'm going to build a capitalist John Galt kind of town.

That's cool.

We're going to experiment.

I could do that, but I can't think of a thing or an entity that I would want.

You wouldn't buy,

you know,

some Disney property that you want, or they would never sell it to me.

And it would be much more than $54 billion.

Yeah.

Well, I mean, yeah, maybe the space needle only just to spite

all of the people in Seattle that are crazy.

Because they could never,

right?

They could, as long as I keep the elevator up at the top, they could never grapple up.

Yeah.

You know, so I'd be safe.

I would, you know what I would do?

I'd put Crisco on the legs of the Space Needle.

So you're just basically being Rapunzel?

Is that your story?

And I never come down.

And then I electrify the roof and I electrify the little thing that goes around the space needle.

So if you're trying to skydive in, you're trying to, and you have to look at me

all the time.

I'm in every picture you want because I have the space needle.

And so I'm there every time just pissing you off and maybe pissing on you from time to time.

You know?

If it's raining, really?

Is it?

Does it rain all the time in Seattle or is that Kunbek pissing on us from the space needle, which he just bought?

It might be that.

Find out how much that's worth.

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We should call American Financing.

How much down do I need to buy the space needle?

What kind of rate can I get on a $10 billion loan?

Right.

Now, there's no way for me to pay that back unless somehow or another I'm related to Michael Bloomberg and his only relative and he decides to leave it to me.

And he inexplicably has SARS,

which is a really weird thing for him to get today.

He could have it.

He could have it.

I don't even remember what SARS was.

I think it was one of those viruses that was going around China for a while.

It was one of those things that, like,

2010.

But when I said it, I'm like, oh, God, I hope that wasn't one of those really bad things.

It was pretty scary for, you know, it was like the swine flu.

Remember for like one year,

freaked out about it?

It's the flu.

And there's a new one, too, by the way, that looks, again, very scary.

Yeah.

It's a flu.

It kills old people.

And people with the regular flu kills a lot of old people.

Yeah, I know.

Sadly.

This is just a souped up flu.

Okay, we got it.

We got it.

You understand the.

I understand the concept of the flu.

I got it.

And this is a bad one.

Okay, get over it.

Do you remember?

Do you remember when AIDS

was first coming on the scene and there was a product called the AIDS Diet Plan?

Oh, yeah.

Or like Canada.

AYDS.

AYDS.

AIDS DIET PLAN.

And I remember when you saw AIDS and everybody was losing weight and they were just,

it was just a horrible death.

I just remember thinking, those people in that company are just like, good God, you couldn't have called it Butterfinger?

You couldn't have cut anything.

Anything but AIDS?

Yeah.

And they just disappeared.

I don't.

Definitely a secondary tragedy of the virus, but

it was sad.

It was sad.

Not as sad as the actual

virus.

That would be number one.

That would be number one.

Number two was the candy diet company.

Those two things.

Man.

Both victims.

That would have been the.

See, that's my kind of investment.

I would be like, just before AIDS was, I'd say, billion dollars, this AIDS diet company, they got a bright, bright future.

Jump right in.

Jump right in.

And then the next day.

They would announce

the actual disease of the same name.

And the ink would be dry.

And I would be back to doing this.

Anyway,

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We pause for 10 seconds.

Station ID.

I'm going to go to Nathan in Virginia, who was at the rally yesterday.

Hello, Nathan.

Welcome to the program.

Hey, how's it going, Glenn?

Good.

Thank you so much for holding, especially through all of our nonsense.

Wow.

You know, there was a lot of blah, blah, blah, but that's fine.

Yeah.

Look, I love you guys and all that, but listen, yesterday was nothing but a peaceful grouping of people in Virginia.

Yeah.

It was great, wasn't it?

The left tried to scare us away from coming to that event, and I don't appreciate that at all.

And what Governor Northam has been doing and what he's been up to,

I'm proud to see that most of the people at the event were...

Are you still listening?

Did you hang up?

No, we're still here.

I'm not listening, but we're still here.

A little insecure there.

Yeah.

Boy, a little hostile, too, Nathan.

i mean i know we made you wait a long time

nathan this is the same nathan that got in trouble for like we'll impeach trump you know

i don't remember that on this show yes on that show man it happened back in the day you know remember remember those days no i don't but now that you bring it up now i'm more likely to hang up on you

am i supposed to be mad at you am i still mad at you or No, we, I actually, I called you and asked you to forgive me.

Oh, I remember that call.

I remember you, Nathan.

I remember that one.

Anyways, look, man, look, I'm just saying yesterday was a success all around.

It was.

We had the LGBTQ XYZ LMNOP community there.

And we talked to them, and we were civil with them, and they were civil with us, and they had the same worry that we had.

Isn't that great?

We had the Asians, we had blacks.

It wasn't, there was no neo-speaking.

Did you have the whites?

I'm Jewish.

Well, obviously we had the whites coming to the colours.

Okay, yeah, the whites.

Okay, I just want to make sure you had all the colors.

they called them rednecks and neo-nazis and all sorts of yeah terrible things and that that's not what was there actually it was just a lot a lot of americans coming and taking maybe a holiday from work because it was martin luther king day and using it towards what we're trying to do here and that's to get america back to the constitution nathan i appreciate your phone call i'm glad that you went out there thank you for the update i i will tell you that i was really proud of i was proud of america i was proud of Virginians yesterday.

It's what I expected.

Nobody in the press expected that, but that's exactly what I expected.

And it was good to see Americans being Americans.

You even cleaned up after yourself.

People brought garbage bags.

The place, as always, was left cleaner than it was when they got there in the morning.

You're listening to Glenn Beck.

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For Stu, that's great.

Hey, I'd just like to start a new segment.

I don't know if we could do this every day or maybe even more than once a year, but the new segment is Not All People Suck.

And I think this is not more than once a year, obviously.

I saw it's an annual, biannual.

It might be

every,

you know, we'll find one and we save it for the presidential election years.

Okay.

Yeah, so once every four years.

Once every four years.

See the Olympics.

Yeah.

Please write out a good story.

We've got a good story about people that make you go, you know, not everybody sucks.

Okay.

So this is a story about Howard Kirby.

Now, Howard was living in

Owasso, Michigan.

I don't even.

I don't even.

Okay.

Owasso.

Get a real name if you're a town.

Anyway, he purchased at the Habitat for Humanity restore.

He purchased a couch and an ottoman.

And he brought it home and it was just for his man cave.

And he was sitting in it and he was like really uncomfortable.

And he was, you know, saying, geez, man, this, this is...

The ottoman is just really uncomfortable.

It doesn't feel at all like

the couch.

And so his daughter says,

let me look at it.

And so she found a zipper on it and she unzipped it.

And inside,

they discovered stacks of hundred-dollar bills.

Okay, nice.

Now, it's not Michael Bloomberg money, but it's sweet money.

Okay, okay.

Now, I want to ask, remember, the name of this is not all people suck, but we know that most do.

Okay,

so

the first stop on the most do train is

if you found

$43,170

in a couch, you just bought possession nine-tenths of the law.

This was a

couch.

You didn't steal it.

They sold it to you.

It was in there.

It didn't belong to Habitat for Humanity.

They had it.

They supposedly went over it, you know, make sure it was good.

And they sold it to me.

What do you do with the $43,000?

What is the thing that you do?

What's my public position?

Is that what you're at?

Your real position.

I mean, I think I would be tempted.

Oh, I'll be so tempted, but I wouldn't do it.

Pocket the $43,000, but I think I probably get tempted and then eventually make a call to the place I bought it and say, hey.

Oh, see, I would be tempted to pocket the $43,000, but then I'd know I'd blow it all quickly, so I would actually make the call and

set up a time to bring it to the bank.

I would do exactly the same thing.

I would be really tempted, but I couldn't live with myself.

It would be almost blood money.

It'd be couch money.

Because, yeah, you'd wonder what the story was.

I will say I would definitely exploit it for the most attention and positive.

Oh, my gosh.

Yeah, I would be like, I am

Tiny Tim.

I'm just basically a great person.

I am Tiny Tim here.

I want everybody to

look at me.

Look at me.

Look at me.

I'm Tiny Tim.

I would change my license plate to look at me

after doing this because I'd want everyone to know what a great person I was, and I would do it just for personal gain.

I mean, at the end of the the day, I might as well just keep the money.

I'm just going to do it.

I might just have my personal campaign would be, who's better than me?

And my license plate would just read, not you.

Not you.

Okay.

So anyway.

So he.

This is biblical, right?

Yeah, of course it is.

Of course, it is.

It's in the Bible someplace.

It's all in the Bible.

We're still in Bible country.

So

Kirby buys this place, you know, buys his couch from this, you know, secondhand Habitat for Humanity thing.

And,

you know, the guys that are working there, they're getting getting rich.

He calls up and says, hey, you know that couch you sold me?

Yes.

I found $43,000

in the couch.

Now, you're working at the Habitat for Humanity place,

and you know that most people suck,

and you don't really see a future.

You know, you're working.

selling used couches.

Yeah.

What do second question?

What do you do when somebody calls and says, hey, I have this $43,000.

Do you know who it belongs to?

Because you're opening up my mind to a lot of possibilities.

Yeah, my answer is yes, I do know who it belongs to.

Just bring it to me.

Bring it to me and I'll take care of it.

I will deliver it to the person, which, because I am only saying that because I know

you're going to start a campaign of who's better than me and your license plate is going to be not you.

Right.

So there's also, and we should explore this a little bit too, there's the thought that you call up the Habitat for Humanity and you say, hey, I found an Ottoman with $36,400 in it.

So Kirby passes two tests for people that don't suck.

Because he could easily have just said a lower number.

Yeah.

Although we could say there could have been 50K in there, and he was only saying 41.

So we don't know for sure.

So he might suck a little bit.

Maybe.

He might suck.

But still, overall, pretty good guy.

Pretty good guy.

And then the Habitat for Humanity person, I guess if you're working at Habitat for Humanity, you're probably more likely

to be a good person.

Either that or you're a washed-out why no, you know, and then Habitat for Humanity is like, we got to have somebody.

I mean, we're at a 3.9% unemployment rate.

Who do we get?

Right.

And some guy's like, I love your couches.

And you're like, you want to work here?

Right.

Okay.

Okay.

So the Habitat for Humanity.

But they could have easily said, though, I know who it is.

Bring it in.

We'll get it to them.

You're a really good person.

You know what?

Keep $100 because you're such a good person.

And then you keep the

house.

But he didn't do that either.

He actually knew who sold them the couch.

So he called her

and he said,

Was there anything in that couch of yours?

Now, somebody calls me.

I think

maybe there's a

I don't know, a dead heroin addict that you know was stuffed into the couch that I didn't know of.

Oh, right, right.

You know, there's SARS, which just killed Michael Bloomberg, apparently, and he left all of his money to some radio guy.

So, I don't, you know, I'm thinking, wow, what's wrong?

I should train myself to think money might be in that couch.

So the answer is money.

That's what you should say.

Anybody says, hey, you know that chair or that couch or that picture frame that you sold me?

Yeah.

Did you, what do you know about that?

I made a huge mistake.

It was worth a lot of money.

It was given to me by my great, great, great grandmother.

I'm so glad you called.

I've been panicking.

I'm so glad I've been panicked.

Why?

What did you find?

I think that's the right way to go.

It's like Ghostbusters.

If someone asks if you're a god, you say yes.

Yes, right?

Yes.

That's what you do.

Yes, exactly right.

It's exactly right.

So let's just keep that

in case anybody finds money or the Declaration of Independence behind something that you sold at a garage sale.

Just they call and say, hey, what did you know about that?

You say, oh, my gosh, did you find it?

Please tell me it's still all there.

That's how you answer that question.

Oh, thank God.

Please tell me it's all still there.

Yes.

Okay.

That's the right answer.

Oh, I'm so glad.

Well, I don't want to tell you.

Wait, wait, because if they say, well, what is it?

Wait, if you didn't find it, I don't think we should talk about it, but I do need it back.

Right?

I desperately need it back.

So it's easy to do that.

So this woman didn't do that.

When they call her, now she's the third person.

And she's like, well, that was my father's couch.

And I just sold it.

And I gave it to Habitat for Humanity.

She didn't say it was hers.

So all the way down the line, you go, well, that guy's dead.

So I guess that money's mine.

None of them did that.

They returned the $43,000 to the original woman.

It was her father's.

He apparently was like, I don't trust the banks, which I agree with.

But I tell my children where the money is before I kick it.

And so apparently he put all of his money.

into the into the couch.

Either that or this story has a really bad ending: that he was some like mob guy and he was keeping drug money in the couch.

But let's not.

But again, the title is not everyone doesn't suck.

It's that some people don't suck.

So it still would work.

Though I think there's an opportunity here.

First of all, if you're the daughter and you've donated this to Habitat for Humanity, isn't it the right thing to do to donate the money to Habitat for Humanity?

And isn't it Habitat Humanity for Humanity's position?

You know what?

We sold it.

And, hey,

you got it.

And if we told you, it comes as is,

and as is had $43,000 in it.

And, you know, we wouldn't have helped you if you found, you know,

SARS in it with a dead junkie.

Yeah.

So,

well, I think

it's yours.

The way this is

what happens to the money, though, because the way this should end is they split it three ways.

Right?

That's the way this should end.

Where like the guy who tuned it in gets a nice reward, Habitat for Humanity gets a donation, and the person who didn't even know she had the money gets a big chunk of extra money.

That's exactly what Solomon would say to those three.

Let's cut the baby.

Let's cut the baby in thirds.

You each take a third.

Right.

And that's when somebody like me says, Solomon, no, no, no.

Guys, the right thing to do is give the money to me.

The fourth person?

The fourth person.

He wasn't even involved?

No.

No.

It was my money originally.

And your dad stole it from me.

Exactly right.

He was a bastard.

He was a bad, bad man.

And I'm going to spend half of the money advertising.

What a horrible person.

So, this is depending on if you count me or not, this is three out of four or three out of five people aren't all bad.

All right.

Having a really good time.

Having a

good.

Can I start this over?

Sure.

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Is it too much?

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Not to mention, I need to protect all of my Ottomans.

Right.

You don't know what's in those old ones.

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You're listening to Glenn Beck.

I have another good story for you.

Would you like another good story?

You have two positive stories in the same day.

I do.

I do.

I do.

This is fascinating.

I'm skipping over the laziest states in America.

Are you skipping over the 45-year-old man caught with child pornography and says he identifies as an eight-year-old girl?

Only because I want to hit that one tomorrow.

That one's worth a lot of discussion.

And I am skipping Man High on Meth fights off 15 15 police officers while masturbating.

That's a double.

That's a double tasker.

You're multitasking in a serious way.

I don't want that skill, but that's a skill.

That is a skill.

That's a skill.

It sounds like, you know, I don't know, at least circus level performance of some sort.

It seemed like a good pre-workout as well.

Oh, yeah, it's the meth thing, so it's really not a skill.

He's probably not a good at that.

No.

You think he just naturally was going around beating up 15 people while masturbating?

I didn't think about it.

Yeah, well, it could be.

I mean, we learned people suck.

All right, here's a good story:

104-year-old Marine Corps veteran, 104.

He served in World War II, injured at the Battle of Iwo Jima.

He lives in California now, and he has a lifetime of scrapbooks.

He's kept all kinds of stuff.

He's 104.

He says, I save everything.

I'm saving little things that have come up until right now as a personal part of my history.

His mementos include a purple heart for surviving Iwo Jima.

Gee, and that's it.

That's all they.

So the rest of his mementos must suck because he's got one

that's mentioned in there.

Here's what he wants: he's 104 years old.

He wants Valentine's Day cards.

And so he wants

to receive a bunch of Valentine's Day cards.

So I think,

I mean, when I say we, it's like the Royal We.

I'm not going to do it, but I think we should do this.

Okay.

Operation Valentine.

Just attention.

Major Bill White.

The Oaks at Inglewood, 6725 Inglewood Avenue, Stockton, California,

95207.

I think that's great.

That's cool.

I like that.

I'd love to see that guy just,

well, not covered in Valentine's because he would probably die.

He's 100 and he'll be 105.

I mean, is this one of those circles?

Because you would think in a big moment like this, and you have this last sort of request as you're getting older, you want to, you might go Christmas, you might go Easter, you might go

Valentine's Day, is it just because it's the closest one?

Maybe.

You know, you're just like, okay, I want to get a bunch of cards, and Valentine's Day is around the corner.

And I may be gone by

Easter.

105 years old.

105.

Maybe, maybe.

Either that or Valentine's Day, you know, you're 105.

I'm guessing that, you know, you haven't had a sweetheart send you something for

at least 10 years.

Let's say, you know, most people, you know, 95, that's a, so at least 10 years.

You could be dating younger,

you know,

maybe

30-year-old sweetheart.

I mean, love is, you know, age is a number.

Doesn't sell

as

a lot of money.

And love does

transcend all,

except being poor, I think.

Poor people can't fall in love.

No, poor people can fall in love, but 105-year-old men don't necessarily attract a lot of 30-year-old women.

Unless they happen to be like the very wealthy.

What was the woman who had the reality show?

She was in Playboy, Blonde, and a Nicole Smith.

Yeah, right.

That's a choice.

Exactly right.

Like maybe if you're 105 and

you're that guy, then you might have somebody that is like, hey, I don't even know if he's going to make it to Valentine's Day.

So there's not a lot of work on that.

It's possible.

He's asleep by 2.30 in the afternoon, and he gets up at noon.

So.

Which sounds fantastic.

I got to be on to this video.

I was going to make a video on.

I just made a video of me, you know, from like when I was growing up.

And he sat there and talked to the TV for an hour and a half.

He thought it was me sitting there.

I don't even have to show up for this.

You sucked some of the sweetness out of the story.

A little bit.

A little bit.

A little bit.

In the presentation, I don't know if it was detectable to the audience.

I think this is really cool.

Get your kids to do this.

Operation Valentine will post the website.

I'll just tweet it out.

Major Bill White, Oaks at Inglewood, 6725 Inglewood, Stockton, California.