Best of the Program | Guests: Mark Poulin & Elizabeth Grandstaff | 2/14/19

Hello, America.

Well, here it is, our podcast for Valentine's Day.

Shows kind of a mixture of love and hate.

Hate the things going on in Washington.

Love the things that are happening to our listeners.

Oh, it's Valentine's Day.

Coming together.

And we're seeing couples come together as part of a Couple of the Year celebration we do every year.

And I think we all know that any good relationship is based in lies.

And that's why we have our Couple of the Year, which is a total and complete sham.

It's really made for people who

didn't get reservations, didn't buy a car, didn't do something,

and now is in hot water.

We tried to bail them out, and I think it's rather touching and beautiful.

So we have that and so much more, including Andrew Heaton and our

hatred for Washington, all on today's podcast.

You're listening to the best of the Bland Beck program.

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So

is

Sarah with us?

Are you back today, Sarah?

Okay, good.

Because this is a complex show that we're...

Very special episode.

Very special episode.

At the end, we're going to adopt a new neighbor child.

But this is a special episode for Valentine's Day.

And what we're doing is we're pulling guys' butts out of the fire.

Now, we are not here to make excuses for you, even though I think some men might have have really tried and just something happened.

And we understand that.

How do you know that?

Do you know of anything?

I don't think we need to get into that.

But we're not here to save you on anything.

You're still going to have to pay for everything.

You're still going to have to make all the things.

We're just buying you time.

Yeah.

So the idea is here, if you are waking up this morning, realizing it's Valentine's Day.

and saying, holy crap, I have no reservation.

There's no way I'm going to get decent flowers at this point.

What am I going to do?

We here at the Glen Beck program have a temporary solution for you.

This doesn't get you out of treating your spouse or girlfriend nicely.

And I warn you: if your spouse or girlfriend listens to this show, oh, you're screwed.

You are doomed.

Yes.

You're doomed.

Do not try to take advantage of this if they listen to the show.

Try, we don't want you to mention the local radio station you're on, where this is going to be the Big Frog

110 FM.

So

she cannot find it later because you're doomed.

Literally, we have experience with this.

But

if you know she doesn't listen, this is going to be your Grid Out of Jail Free for a few days card.

Right.

So

if you're interested in this and you realize you're in this situation, you can call now 888-727-BECK.

You're going to listen to how this works here in just a moment as we have our first caller lined up that wrote in from social network last night.

The idea here is

because

of a contest you entered,

and you have now won,

we are asking you to delay your Valentine's Day.

Because we screwed up.

Because we screwed up.

It's our fault.

And you have been named the couple of the year because of a romantic letter you have written.

Can I see the background here?

Show the background because we're going to make the whole studio look different here when they're on the phone so they can clip it.

And you can.

Okay, so go to the Valentine's Couple of the Year background.

Can you do that?

This is one of the reasons why you need the blaze.

Today, it should be really good.

This is the data.

It's a couple of the year.

Couple of the year.

There it is.

Oh, and it looks so good, doesn't it?

Right.

So you win this magical couple of the year because of this heartfelt letter you wrote.

Now, we'll help you through that letter because we've done this many times, and we have a scientific way of knowing how this will work.

There's very specific things you have to do.

We'll walk you through them.

You have to answer a few questions, and we will get you through this.

When you win the couple of the year, of course, your wife thinks you're so thoughtful, which you obviously are not if you're in this situation.

Well, you might have been.

There just might have been some extenuating circumstances.

You keep bringing that up.

Let's not get into it.

Keep bringing that up.

You don't need to talk about it.

I'm just sticking up for some guys who may not be dirtbags.

Right.

And so, if you obviously, when your wife thinks you're that thoughtful, she'll be thrilled to say, you know what, let's delay the plans that my husband had already made.

But you better make good on it.

But then you have to make good on it next week or you're totally dead.

Yeah.

Okay.

So let me go to James.

He's in North Carolina, and we have a form letter that he has to fill out.

And then we'll call his spouse.

It is, James, it is your wife?

Yes, sir.

How long have you been married?

Ten years.

Ten years.

Have you ever missed a Valentine's Day before?

No, sir.

Have you ever missed a birthday or anniversary?

No, sir.

Okay.

So this is the type of person you're talking about.

Maybe not a bad guy.

Just ask.

What's your excuse for missing Valentine's Day this year?

Well, I was in Indiana.

So they don't have stores at Indiana or phones or the internet?

What's that?

You were with a girlfriend.

What were you doing in Indiana?

I was working.

You were working in Indiana?

Oh, you work on the railroad.

So, okay.

All right.

So you have a pretty good excuse.

Okay.

The reason why we ask.

This is not an out-of-control wildfire.

I don't know why they have the wildfires behind me.

James, the reason why we ask is because the more, the lazier you've been, the longer you have to wait for the last line.

So you have not been lazy.

You just made a, you know, you just had a, you know, a situation arise.

So we have this theory that the longer you wait between, what's your wife's name?

Aaron.

Aaron.

Okay, the longer you wait between the between the name Aaron and I love you,

the more powerful it is, but the harder it is because it's so powerful.

So you are just going to have to wait for five seconds at the end, and I want you to count it out.

I want you to say, when I say, hey, is there anything, James, you want to say before we hang up?

And you just say, yes, Glenn, thank you.

Aaron, and then in your head, don't out loud, in your head, one, two,

three,

four,

five.

I love you.

Okay?

That will hit her hard.

That will hit her hard.

Yeah.

You got it?

Now, we will say, too, if you go too soon, if you, if she, because she may very slow.

What?

What is it, honey?

What is it?

You can't respond.

You got to wait the full five seconds.

If you go too soon, we're going to blow it for you.

We're going to just tell her.

And it won't work.

It will be bad.

You're totally screwed.

So you have to make sure you wait that five seconds.

All right.

You want to go to what's the name of the place?

Sullivan Steakhouse.

Oh, I think Sullivan's.

Sullivan's is good.

Sullivan's really good.

I love that place.

Okay.

What day do you want to go?

We're Saturday.

We're doing to Saturday.

This Saturday.

Okay.

And she doesn't know it.

No, sir.

Okay.

Love Dr.

Ready?

Yes, we have to go through the letter.

Oh, yeah.

Okay.

All right.

Let's see.

First question.

I had to tell you about my beautiful wife, Erin.

How uniquely wonderful Erin is.

What first attracted you to her?

Her eyes.

Her eyes.

Are you lying, or why did it take you so long to think of that?

Wait, did you say her butt, like her butt, and used a crash term, or you say eyes?

Eyes.

There is a technical.

Her eyes.

Here's the problem.

And this is a lot of people say eyes.

That's the problem with it.

Everyone says eyes.

It has to be something other than eyes.

Anything but eyes.

I'm the love doctor I know.

Her smile.

Her smile.

Okay, we'll give you that one.

We may eliminate smile as well.

Eyes and smile are just.

Let's try it.

Let's try.

All right, we'll try smile.

But as time went into so much more, I guess the true love, the first time, you knew it was true love.

The first time you

what?

I met her children.

Met her children.

That's a good one.

That's good.

She's going to love that.

That's great.

Is that true?

Yes,

don't ask questions.

We don't know.

You're right.

You're right.

You're right.

I don't want to know too much.

And that trip to Give Me a Great Vacation you guys had.

Gatlinburg, Tennessee.

Gatlinburg.

She's going to remember that one, huh?

That was a nice trip.

Yeah.

Okay.

I guess what sets her apart is the distinctive way she does something like nobody else.

And what would that be?

My damn the sun she does.

Should be easy to narrow it down then.

Yeah, she's a.

Something unique about

the way she takes care of our house and our farm.

And your phone.

Phone or farm?

Farm.

Farm.

Okay.

The way she

takes

care of

our home

and farm.

Farm.

Okay.

What hair color does she have?

She's a.

It's a light golden brown.

Light golden brown.

Great answer.

You could have just said brown, but light golden brown is so much better.

It's going to be so much more effective.

I could go on forever.

Have to get back to work at what company?

I work for a company called Nordcode.

What is it?

NordCode.

Hmm.

Is that are those like English letters?

Sorry, I don't understand.

Can you say this low?

I said dumb people like us.

Okay, shuttle wagon.

How about that?

Shuttle wagon.

Shuttle brand.

I love shuttle wagon.

Shuttle wagon.

And

what do you do at shuttle wagon?

I'm a mechanic.

For mobile rail car movers.

Mechanic.

And what was the rest of it?

Mechanic for what?

Mobile rail car movers.

For mobile.

Okay, yeah.

All right, mobile

rail car.

How do you feel about the new Green Deal, huh?

Movers.

Lots of new trains.

Yep.

And you work there Monday through Friday or?

Yes, sir.

Monday through Friday.

What time usually?

Like what hours?

Like 9 to 5, 8.30 to 5.30?

8 to 4.30?

8 to 4.30.

8 to 4.30.

Okay.

Okay, and I love Aaron.

Okay, so I'm going to have you practice.

So I'm going to say to you at the end, is there anything you want to say, James, to Aaron before we hang up?

And you say.

Aaron?

I love you.

Oh, that's beautiful.

That's beautiful.

Okay.

Perfect.

All right.

We get to the Love Doctor business and try to heal this.

I'm nervous.

Are you?

We're going to take one minute break, tell you about our commercial, then back.

And we'll get Aaron on the phone here in just a second.

The best of the Glenbeck program.

So I'm getting nervous.

I am actually nervous too.

We blow this.

It's not good.

No, it ruins relationships, but we've saved more relationships than we've ruined.

ruined, and that's the way we look at it.

That's right.

There have been a couple of divorces.

Well, there's divorces all the time.

Exactly right.

They probably wouldn't have lasted anyway.

Again, the guy already forgot Valentine's Day.

It's not our fault that he's.

Divorce is in the cards.

Divorce is likely going to occur anyway.

Right.

Unless he was a guy who really did do the job, but then somebody on his staff kind of dropped the ball.

You keep bringing this up.

I don't think we need to talk about it.

I'm just saying that some people

are good guys who love their wife

and things happen and still don't have reservations.

Let's get James,

his wife, on the phone.

Are we dialing out now?

We're calling now.

Let's make sure she doesn't get

on hold until we are ready to start because they can't hear this conversation.

This would ruin it.

Okay.

It needs to be.

So as soon as she picks up the phone, you start the bed and put the, go ahead and put the, put the, there you go.

Oh, yeah, a couple of the earthing.

And Stu is dressed as the love doctor.

I don't know why it looks so this this green screen looks so 1970s.

It looks

because

go back to the original studio thing.

The original.

Because that looks, you can't tell that that's...

That looks perfect.

Now go to the couple of the year.

I don't know why.

I think it looks great.

Does it?

Okay, good.

It looks exactly like I would picture this bit going, right?

The fact that some radio station is doing a cheesy couple of the year thing, and it's so overly

over the top.

Right.

Okay, so do we have her on the phone yet?

Okay.

It's going to voicemail.

James, where is she?

James.

Yes, she's at the house.

She's at the house.

It's going to voicemail.

She's probably not recognizing the number.

I think it might.

There may be.

You may need to text her and say, hey, there's an important call coming in.

Make sure you answer it.

All right.

This is very.

This is when it gets really hard because you know we're trying to save people's relationships here and if if she doesn't pick up you're basically getting a divorce you know you're saying that dressed as a doctor it makes it sound a pin in because I believed you but not quite okay, but now that you put the pin right there

Now I believe you a little bit more if it wasn't a cheap plastic pick pin

I could do a sharpie

no that would look even there you go.

Oh, that looks scientific It does look kind of scientific It does look scientific I have requested some glasses, too.

I think if I have some fake glasses, it'll look better.

Would you like to wear mine?

Well, no, yours are real.

And then, like, it'll hurt your eyes.

Oh, yeah, that's true.

I don't know.

Maybe not.

That's what I'd have you believe.

So, this is your chance to get in on this, by the way.

888-727-BECK is the phone number.

We will line this up for you.

Again, your wife obviously has to be available.

If she's in the middle of an MRI,

this is not the day for you

who are screwed.

You're screwed.

Because you've forgotten Valentine's Day and your wife is having a CAT scan for some reason.

Really not a good day to forget.

No.

Really not a good day to forget.

Probably not.

By the way,

I'm going to go to New York to the

National Day of Mourning event.

You are?

Yes.

I've decided I'm going to go.

Is this confirmed?

I thought there was still all sorts of

hurdles to clear.

I'm pretty sure it's all concerned.

Because

I was at a meeting I had at 8 p.m.

last night.

There were still lots of hurdles to clear.

Those have all been cleared out.

Because I had one at 5 where I made it very clear.

But what I'm saying is, my meeting was after your meeting.

Right.

So I probably have more knowledge.

Anyway,

yesterday we had a guest on, and she talked about this event she was doing in Albany a week from Saturday.

And it is a pro-life event, but it's not a rally or anything.

It's a national day of mourning

where we are going to, or they are going to gather

and

have talks and also prayer for a national day of mourning, asking God, please forgive us for all of this.

And that's one of the things we have to do.

Yes.

And that's a very important thing, but it is a bit of a distraction from something that you keep bringing up, which is that us people's people who have staffs might have had issues with Valentine's Day.

I don't know anyone who has a staff other than you.

It could be Donald Trump.

You think Donald Trump forgot Valentine's Day?

I highly doubt that.

No, no, I didn't say forgot Valentine's Day.

I said talked to his staff and had decided on stuff.

And then there was a changeover in staff,

which is oddly specific there, too, but changeover in staff.

And then

two days before,

you know, this particular individual says, okay, so we're all on for dinner at, you know, Trulock's and

or someplace like that,

Waffle House.

And

the staff just gets really quiet.

And then they look down on the calendar and say,

yeah.

And then an hour later, they come back and say,

okay, here's the thing.

So we.

True Lux is a restaurant that there's several of us

as an example.

In our area.

Using this as an example.

You also had your executive assistant who just left to start her own business.

That's why I came up with that crazy example.

And the wife had been called to make sure that that particular restaurant was the one she wanted to go to.

And so she was very excited about it.

And now you couldn't get a reservation no matter who you are.

You blew it is what you're saying.

No, you

blew Valentine's Day.

And

this is why you were so intent on bringing this bit back.

I don't know why my wife is all of a sudden Valentine's Day this year is so important.

Usually it's like, let's go to a movie.

Now, I'm not saying that

we were going to a restaurant and we are going.

We're absolutely.

I've planned this for a long time.

Unless that restaurant lost your reservation.

Darn it.

Which happens all, this happens all too often.

I'll tell you that much.

Anyway, so I really did try.

And now it's not, no.

No, this is great.

So you have, you should have sympathy for these people.

You're one of them.

I do have sympathy for them.

What if?

Because I have been on it the whole time.

What if we

give Tanya couple of the year?

Okay, we need to get to her fast here, so

let's get to him first.

We got to go through the letter quickly.

Okay, let's go through the letter.

We have Jonathan, right?

Jonathan?

Yes.

Okay, is Jillian on the line?

We don't want to put her on yet.

Yeah, she is.

Yeah, she is.

It's Jalan.

You got to get that.

Oh, Jalan.

Jalan.

Jalan, okay.

And

Jonathan, let's just go through this letter because I don't understand some of the things things you wrote in here.

Uh, it's just kind of like a form letter where you just fill in the blanks.

Jalan, Jalan, personality.

The first time we worked at Pizza Hut, you knew it was true love?

I did.

It's kind of funny.

We were back on the show.

Don't need to hear the story.

Don't need to hear the story.

Just trying to help.

This is all science.

This is science.

So you both worked at Pizza Hut?

We did.

We both worked at Pizza Hut.

Okay, that's too much.

It's too much.

I don't need to know the story.

Then you went to the Dominican Republic on a vacation?

We okay we did okay and uh i guess what sets her apart is the distinctive way she and what is written here is vocabulary what the hell does that mean

her expanded vocabulary her express always always correcting my vocab uses her uses her expanded

okay

um what's her hair color the hair color she'll claim uh brown brown

uh you live in ellis county uh you work at the uh department of defense that is correct wow wow this is this is this is what our country depends on he was busy working on stuff okay you were away guys i'm stalling i'm stalling a meeting just for this right now okay all right so missiles are flying in we're not shooting them down because of this phone call monday through friday 40 hours a week uh gel on oh but restaurant restaurant there yeah restaurant what restaurant do you want to take her to

uh not pizza hut anymore um

the the colombian is a nice restaurant the column the columbian Okay, you know, we're not paying for it.

Oh, you're not?

No.

You get nothing from us except we're buying you a few extra days.

Okay.

I'm on a DOD salary, though.

Come on.

Yeah, that's not the way this works, sir.

You shouldn't have gone into

the public sector.

You go to the private sector to make money.

So, Colombian,

Colombian restaurant, what day do you want to go?

Next Friday.

Next Friday.

Okay.

You have to make the reservations.

All right.

Have you ever missed a Valentine's Day or birthday or anniversary?

Not an anniversary because it's on Valentine's Day.

Oh, my gosh.

You forgot your anniversary and Valentine's Day today?

I know.

It's pretty long.

Oh, my God.

You get a full 10 seconds.

You're killing ISIS members by yourself.

Yes, you get a full 10 seconds.

It's as high as we go.

Yeah.

So now here's the thing.

You have to say, I'm going to say it to you at the very end.

So, Jonathan, is there anything you want to say to Jillan

before we part?

And you say, yes, I do.

Jalan, you have to count to full 10 seconds, no matter what she says.

Are you there?

Hello?

Anything.

You wait 10 seconds, and then you say, I love you.

All right?

Let's practice one time.

One time.

So,

Jonathan, is there anything you want to say to Jalan before we hang up?

You don't wait there.

You don't wait there and say yes.

Jalan,

then you count.

Zora is there anything you want to say?

Yes.

The name?

You got to say that.

Say her name first.

It's the separation between the name and the I love you that makes it so powerful.

We're screwed and our defense is screwed.

Okay.

Okay.

So you say yes, Glenn.

Jalan, then you count.

I love you.

Got it?

Yes, Glenn.

Jalan.

Then I count the 10 seconds.

Yes.

Then you say, I love you.

Got it?

Okay.

This is dicey.

Wow, this is dicey.

Please don't equip the drones with just the auto kill.

All right, here we go.

We can put her on.

Let's go ahead and put this full screen back behind me.

And now it's the contest a year in the making.

It's Glenn Beck's quest to find America's ultimate couple of love.

The essays have been written, the heartfelt words have been read, and the winner has been selected.

So now, to introduce the country's most passionate pair, here's the love god himself, Glenn Beck.

Wow, we have gone all out this year, and you know, this lasts the entire year,

just trying to find the most romantic couple and the couple that America feels is an example to all of us.

And we've brought in

Dick Dickerson, who is a doctor, family therapist.

Dr.

Dickerson, yes, thank you.

Worked hard for the title, and I do appreciate you.

Sure.

And you've been going over this and using all kinds of research and analysis, and your years of study of couples.

As a physician and a counselor and a doctor of love studies, I have met with over 14,000 couples, and I have never seen anything like this.

Okay.

And what was it about this couple?

As you.

Just the unique and distinct ways that he spoke about.

These were not generalities.

He really knew real specifics about this relationship.

And it was really

touching.

Okay.

So, do we have Jonathan on the phone?

Hello, Jonathan.

Yes, I'm here.

Congratulations.

Congratulations on winning.

Now, does Jillan know anything about what's been going on?

No, she doesn't.

Okay.

And I understand today is not just Valentine's Day.

Today is a special day for you.

That is right.

It's our anniversary.

How many years?

How many years?

16.

16 years.

Unbelievable.

Jillan.

Yes.

Are you there?

I am.

Welcome.

You probably are taken aback.

Did Jonathan let on during the year at all that he was doing this?

No, not at all.

Wow.

I never answer the phone.

You never answer the phone?

Not if it's like an 866 number.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Okay.

Well, I'm glad that we got you on the phone because,

and Dr.

Dickerson, this is the letter.

May I read it?

This is the letter, yeah.

And I think you should read it, yeah.

Yeah, I hope you don't mind, Jonathan, that I share with the audience this, but I want to read this to Jalan.

Dear Mr.

Beck, I have never entered a contest like this before.

Is that true, Jonathan?

You're not, this is the first time, huh?

That's God's honest truth.

What was it about this contest that you said, you know what, I'm going to do it?

I'm just such a huge fan of yours, so I had to participate.

That's great.

Okay.

So I've never entered a contest like this before.

However, I felt I had to tell you about my beautiful wife, Jillan.

I really can't express in words how uniquely wonderful Jalan truly is.

Honestly, at first, I think I was just attracted to her personality.

But as time went by, it turned into so much more.

Now, that's unusual, Doctor, because usually people say I was attracted to her body, and then it turns into more.

Right.

No, this is the personality was first here, and we've done many studies with the AMA and the ADA, and we found an incredible amount of

the physical attraction coming first.

But this was sort of the reverse.

I thought it was one of the interesting parts of this.

I guess I knew it was true love the first time we worked at Pizza Hut.

Did you guys work at Pizza Hut together?

Yes.

She remembers that specific thing.

That's one of the

things.

What was it about, Jalan?

What was it about

working together at Pizza Hut that was

for me?

Is that what you're asking?

Yeah, I mean, it's his letter, but I didn't know

if you remembered it as fondly as he did.

I do.

It is so funny because I was working there a good five months and I was closing up.

It was the first time without Jonathan working.

And I have left like all this stuff to do.

And the other kitchen people, they were like, what are you doing?

And I was like, it's not my job.

And they really said, no, it's just Jonathan does it it for you.

Wow.

You know what?

Can I tell you?

I'm going to tell you the God's Honest Truth here, Jalan.

I asked him before we went on to tell me that story because I didn't understand it.

He told it exactly the same way

with the same spirit behind it.

It was really, it's amazing to hear a couple so in sync.

And that trip to the Dominican.

Wow, what a perfect time that was.

Yes, it was,

I think it was well deserved for both of us.

You know, you started out, you were so young.

And I was reflecting on this this morning,

just about how you do not even know or you can't even conceptualize what marriage is at that age.

Wow.

Just something keeps you going and you just keep going forward.

But it doesn't mean that it's easy.

So there's times where you need to take a break and you need to just celebrate each other and kind of say, you know what, I'm sorry.

I'm learning on you and with you.

And there's things that you can hurt each other with, but it doesn't mean that you just give up and walk away.

Wow, Jonathan, in talking to Jillon,

this particular couple of the year, this year, has taken on a new and deeper meaning

hearing her talk about you.

And

it's kind of hard to go on, but I'm going to.

He says, I guess what sets her apart is the distinctive way she uses her vocabulary.

Uses her vocabulary unlike any other brown-haired woman in Ellis County.

The whole county.

He says, I could go on forever, but that would take away from my time with her.

And I have to get back to work at the Department of Defense, where I'm a supervisor.

Monday through Friday, I work 40 hours a week.

Supervisor, yeah.

Besides, everyone always tries to make love so complex, and I think that's why I should be your Valentine's couple of the year, because for me, it's simple.

I just love Jillan.

That is powerful.

I see what you see in that, Doctor.

It's beautiful.

Okay, so here's the thing, and I'm going to have to take the blame on this one.

I happened to be in Washington for the State of the Union and everything else, and I dropped the ball, and we were supposed supposed to take you to one of your favorite restaurants tonight, the Columbian, I guess.

Oh, my goodness, yes.

Yes, but I have been out of town and I dropped the ball on this, and I am so sorry about that.

So, we have you shouldn't take all the responsibility for that.

A lot of that was the charity work you were doing, and it was an admirable thing, but it doesn't matter.

So, anyway, so

we've set up something for you next Friday, if that's okay, at the Columbian.

So, would you mind, please forgive me?

Do you mind not celebrating your anniversary and Valentine's Day until next week?

Can we do it twice?

Is that okay, too?

Well, can you get what?

Can we just do it twice?

Well, as a doctor, I would not recommend that.

No, I think you should wait.

Well, because it.

Well, I think, Jonathan, the way she spoke about Pizza Hut, and it is their anniversary.

That would be great.

I think, you know, maybe.

Tonight you celebrate at Pizza Hut, and next week you do the Columbia.

There you go.

That's a great idea.

Guys, congratulations.

Jonathan, is there anything that you want to say to Jillan?

Yes,

yes, Glenn.

Jalan,

I love you.

Ooh, hang on.

There's a.

Thank you.

Do you want to, is there anything else you wanted to say to Jillan?

I don't know if that, I don't know if I'd say that.

You cut out there, actually, there, and I know

you cut out for about 10 seconds.

So

do you want to try that one more time?

Yeah, yes, yes, sure.

Jalan, I just know

I'm beyond difficult, and I know you're not going to be able to do that.

You're cutting out again.

I know you, I think you may have said I love you.

We kind of lost a little bit of that, but I mean, we lost about 10 seconds of that.

If you could just restate what you were saying earlier,

we don't want to lose that full 10 seconds.

So, is there anything you want to say to Jalan?

Just said, I love you.

I don't know how I could be more fair.

Okay.

We're wildfire.

Is it

wildfire?

We're having issues with

the phone.

Is that

a problem?

Can we ask you guys to hold on for just a second?

Hold on.

We can pick up Jalan, and we could talk maybe to

Jonathan here.

Yeah, just because we don't know.

Yeah, we're having a problem with the connection.

Hang on just a second.

In fact,

Doctor, can you can you I'm going to just do a real quick commercial for a minute and then we'll come back.

But we were having a dickens of a time getting somebody on the other end of the phone.

What year is it?

A dickens of a time?

What year in the 1800s do you believe it is?

What?

Did your power go out last night or something and you put on a long nightgown with a candle?

You walked around the house?

You have a sleeping cap on as it happened?

Sama was in her kerchief and I was in my cap, and we had just settled down for a long winter's nap.

When out on the lawn, I heard such a clatter, and that clatter was no one is picking up the freaking phone to be able to do this bit.

Do we, Sarah, do we have a contestant that we know we can get to the other person?

Not yet.

Not yet.

Okay, so we have a long list of people, but

you have to be able to connect to the other person

so we can make you the couple of the year.

It's advisable to text them and say, hey, or call them and say, hey, there's a call coming in.

You make sure you answer it.

Sarah, how close is Mike, our phone screener, to currently hanging himself?

The noose has been fashioned.

Okay.

Has he found the stool yet?

Not yet.

Okay, because I'm using the rickety one in about five minutes.

But it'll just take me about 45 seconds.

I'll kick it from underneath me and then you can just bring it to Mike.

Sounds good.

Very good.

Thank you very much.

Pat Gray joins us.

Hello, Pat.

Pat Gray.

How are you?

No, I'm perfect.

Yeah.

You?

Oh, my gosh.

I love Valentine's Day.

It's always going well?

Yeah.

Valentine's Day has always gone well for me.

Yeah, me too.

I love it.

I love the holiday.

Oh, especially this year.

Yeah.

I will tell you, Pat, that

I hate you today.

You hate me today?

I do.

I hate you.

We've been friends.

I've been friends from yesterday in what way?

Well, no,

it differs in this way.

Jackie gets it.

She does.

Jackie gets it.

Okay.

This is a made-up, stupid holiday that is really,

for most guys, is really remembered as that really bloody massacre in Chicago that was cool.

If there's a special on it, you watch that.

For sure.

Yeah.

And that's really, that's the only thing special for guys on Valentine's Day.

And I guess women, maybe it's chocolate.

So why don't we just say, hey,

let's stay home.

I'll get you some chocolate.

And let's watch a documentary on the St.

Valentine's Day massacre.

Because

minus the chocolate.

That's exactly what Jackie and I are doing tonight.

Really?

Minus, she won't eat chocolate anymore.

Oh, geez.

I think of you every time I hear you give the spot.

If your wife says, I don't need anything, don't believe it.

Except in the case of my wife.

Well, your wife.

When she says that she really means it because your wife

is, no, she's different.

She is different.

She is different.

She's like a man with female genitality.

No, she's not.

No, she's not.

She's got some manly sensibilities.

She does, but she's got like your grandparents' sensibilities.

She's like, don't get me anything.

We don't need anything.

Practical.

It's impractical to do that.

And you're like, okay, but it might be fun.

You know, this kid.

No, I'll just take it back.

And then in the beginning, I used to ignore that.

And she would tell me,

don't give me anything.

And I would ignore that because she really does want something, I would believe.

And I'd get it and she'd take it back.

I told you I didn't want anything.

Yeah, I know, honey.

I know.

I get.

But the kids really would like to go to Disneyland.

They've heard of this place and they thought it would be, it's impractical.

Do you know how much that costs?

Yeah, but I mean, really, it would be fun for it.

It would be fun.

No.

Wouldn't be fun for that much money.

So

I feel for you at the same time, I hate your guts.

And both for the same reason.

Jackie.

Yeah.

Both tremendous and scary.

Yeah, very in both ways.

Right.

Am I in trouble?

She's not listening, is she?

No, she's not listening.

She doesn't even listen to Pat Ray Unleashed, let alone this show.

No, she does not.

Yeah.

My wife doesn't either.

Do you remember when they thought we were funny?

Yeah.

Yeah.

I lasted about an hour and a half.

And probably after the wedding.

Right.

Then remember when they thought we were funny together?

Yeah.

Yes.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And that, yeah.

And that didn't last either.

Those days don't come back.

And then they just look at each other now

when we're together and go, oh,

and try to walk out of the room.

They do.

People think we were kidding about that.

No, we're not.

No.

People, you know what?

Both of our wives say, I'm guessing yours gets the same thing.

And I think we've talked about this before.

He must be so funny at home.

He must be so much fun.

No.

No.

My wife always gets,

it's,

they used to get,

is he as funny at home as he is?

No.

No.

I thought that too for a while.

Then live with him.

He's not.

Now they get sympathy.

Now they're like, you

are, you're a brave woman.

Okay.

We have somebody here.

We have somebody.

So let's go to Dawn.

Dawn, are you there?

Yes, I'm here.

Okay.

Nancy is.

No.

Okay, so we're going to fill out the form here.

Tell you about my beautiful wife.

Her name is

Julie.

Julie.

I can't express how uniquely wonderful Julie is.

Honestly, at the first time, I thought I was just attracted to her.

Can't say smile, can't say eyes.

It was just her looks.

Her looks.

Her looks.

That's a good answer.

Her looks and her beautiful demeanor.

And beautiful.

Let me check with the doctor.

Beautiful demeanor will work, yeah.

Looks is very honest, and then beautiful demeanor is the lie.

All right, guess I knew it was true, love.

The first time we

come on, be honest.

The first time, I guess, we made eye contact.

I can't use eye, or can I own this?

How about we just leave it at the first time we made contact?

There you go.

It's probably better.

Made contact.

And that trip to any vacation that she'll remember?

Cedar Point.

Is that the

amusement park?

Yes.

The distinctive way she does something like no other person does.

The way she loves her me and her the rest her kids.

the rest the way she loves you and the rest of her kids rest of the family or two kids you're not her kid though right when you say the rest of her kids no i no her and i have two children okay that would just be uncomfortable if you were also her kids how long have you been married how long you've been married don we've been married 24 years see now this is really i want to caution you because if she finds out that you're doing this to buy a few more days just to get i don't i mean it could get ugly so oh no it's fine.

It's been ugly before.

Okay, good.

All right, okay, good.

I love that.

What's your wife's hair color?

The color that she says it is.

She'll say it's blonde.

Blonde.

Okay.

I go on forever.

But I got county.

What county do you live in?

Oh, yeah.

What county?

We live in Hellsboro County.

Hillsborough.

Hellsboro or Hillsborough?

Are you in Tampa?

We're in Plant City.

Oh, okay.

Yeah, Hillsborough County.

Okay.

Never take away from my time with her.

Get back to work.

Where do you work?

I work for Center Point Church.

Center Point Church.

Wow, a church employee.

A church employee married for 25 years.

Not,

I don't.

Okay, what do you do there?

I'm the maintenance manager.

Good thing is, if you work at a church when you need to get reburied, you've got a place already.

Or counseling.

Counseling is free.

Yeah, there you go.

Okay.

You work there from the the hours of what?

9 till 5.

9 till 5, Monday through Friday?

Monday through Thursday.

Monday through Thursday.

And you have Sundays off, I would imagine.

Yeah.

And you love,

you just love Julie.

So now,

have you ever missed a birthday or anniversary or Valentine's Day before?

I have missed a birthday before.

When?

When in the relationship?

It was

two years ago.

Two years ago.

This is trending poorly.

Yes.

Okay.

I missed it by a couple hours.

It doesn't really matter.

It's not like, you know,

at midnight, it's like you didn't say anything for two hours and she knows.

Okay, so here's the thing, Don.

We're going to give you some extra seconds here because we have this theory that the longer you wait between her name and I love you, the more powerful that love is when it's spoken like that.

So we're going to give you a seven-second wait.

And so this is what I want you to do.

I'm going to say, Don, is there anything you want to say to Julie before you leave?

And you say, yes, Glenn.

Julie, then in your head, one, two, three,

four, five, six, seven,

seven.

I love you.

So we got to wait seven seconds.

If you say okay or something like that beforehand, we're going to blow it for you.

Yeah.

And it won't work out well.

Do you want to practice?

Yeah, let's practice one.

Okay, so Don, is there anything you want to say to her before we hang up?

Yes, Glenn.

You have to say her name.

Yes, Denu.

Denny.

I deeply love you.

Oh, that's beautiful.

That's beautiful.

I like the lives.

Yeah.

Okay.

We're going to take a quick break, then we're going to come back with Don.

And Julie.

And if Julie's not there, there's the rickety

stool in the back that we're just going to shove up here.

And we have Don on the phone.

Hello, Don.

Yes.

Don, welcome to the Big Frog.

110FL.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

Is your wife Julie on the phone?

Yes.

Hi, Julie.

How are you?

I'm good.

How are you?

Very good.

Did you have any idea that Don was working on something for you?

I had zero idea.

Zero idea.

Well, you two have been selected as our couple of the year, only one couple every year, and they're pretty amazing.

And what made you select this one, Don?

Well, we've looked at this.

It's a special case.

This is something unique.

It's something different.

We took something out of this letter, I think, that really put them on the edge.

Of course, please.

Here it is.

It says, Dear Mr.

Beck, I've never entered a contest like this before.

Is that true, Don?

Never done anything like this, huh?

Yeah, this is her first time.

However, I felt I had to tell you about my beautiful wife, Julie.

I really can't express in words how uniquely wonderful Julie truly is.

Honestly, at first, I think I was just attracted to her looks

and her beautiful demeanor.

But this, as time went by, it turned into so much more.

I guess I knew it was true love the first time we made contact.

Hmm.

What do you mean by that, Don?

I'm not going to ask anyone.

There's many meanings for that.

Okay, all right.

And that trip to Cedar Point.

Wow.

What a perfect time that was.

You remember that time, Julie?

I sure do.

As fondly as he does?

Oh, yes.

Yeah.

I guess what sets her apart is the distinctive way she loves me and the rest of the family, unlike any other blonde woman in Hillsborough County.

I could go on forever, but that would take away from my time with her.

I have to get back to work.

I work at Cedar Point, where I'm a maintenance manager from 9 to 5, Monday through Friday,

Monday through Thursday, and Sundays off.

Besides, everyone always tries to make love so complex, but that's why I think we should be your Valentine's couple of the year, because for me, it's simple.

I just love Julie.

Wow.

Julie, how do you feel about that?

That was very sweet and unexpected.

Really?

Now, I have to tell you, we're doing this on Valentine's Day, but we've kind of screwed this up.

And so we're going to have to have you guys go out to dinner.

We were supposed to make the reservations and we didn't.

So, Don,

can you get this...

Julie, do you mind if you don't do something something tonight and you postpone it a little bit?

Postpone it?

That is fine.

That's great.

That's great.

Thank you so much, guys.

And Don, is there anything you want to say to Julie?

Well, yes, Glenn.

Julie?

Yes.

I love you.

Beautiful.

Beautiful.

Wow.

Thank you guys very much.

Thank you.

Dawn and Julie from Florida, our couple of the year.

This is the best of the Glenn Beck program.

We're going to run out of time today.

Let me just finish this clip because I just think this clip is just so outrageous.

We all know what's going on in Venezuela.

We all know that Maduro,

he altered the elections.

He took all of the people that were running against him that had a chance and he put them in jail.

This is not a democratically elected guy.

He seized power.

He was elected the first time.

Second time, no.

And he's using food as a weapon.

In that last election, he, in Spanish, his slogan was, you give, I give.

Meaning, you vote for me, I give your community food.

We know what's going on.

We know who's on the right side, but apparently Congressman

Omar has no idea.

She thinks that we're on the wrong side.

Listen to me.

Yes or no, would you support an armed faction within Venezuela that engages in war crimes, crimes against humanity or genocide,

if you believe they were serving U.S.

interests, as you did in Guatemala, El Salvador, and Nicaragua?

I am not going to respond to that question.

I'm sorry.

I don't think this entire line of questioning is meant to be real questions, and so I will not reply.

Good for you.

Whether you, under your watch, a genocide will take place and you will look the other way because American interests were being upheld is a fair question.

Because the American people want to know that anytime we engage a country,

that we think about what our actions could be,

you are lecturing.

I believe our values are being fathered.

That is my question.

Will you

make sure that human rights are not violated and that we uphold international

and human rights?

I suppose there is a question in there, and the answer is that the entire thrust of American policy in Venezuela

is to support the Venezuelan people's effort to restore democracy to their country.

That's our policy.

I don't think anybody disputes that.

The question I had for you is that the interest, does the interest of the United States include protecting human rights?

and include protecting people against genocide.

That is always the position of the United States.

Thank you.

You are not going to get a serious person to take a serious job in this country if that's who you put in Congress.

That is the most insulting thing I've ever heard.

Now, there are bad guys

in Congress, there are bad guys in government, there are bad guys in the public sphere.

But if you really truly believe that american interests come above genocide in a country where we are in laughable it's laughable especially how dare you as a muslim as a muslim say those things while we have been fighting and freeing slaves that muslims have taken because they started a deadly caliphate because we tried to free people

and let's not not over just pass by the fact that we now have at least one member in the U.S.

Congress that believes the American people have committed genocide in three occasions in what, the last 30 years?

I mean,

maybe I'm sure others believe it, but I don't remember anyone else ever saying it.

It's the same person.

It's the exact same person who also thinks that Israel has hypnotized the world.

If that's not anti-Semitic, you can go to one of her many other anti-Semitic statements.

All about the Benjamins.

This woman is so.

This woman, and she's not even the one that wrote for Louis Farrakhan for years.

No, that's Tsalaib.

Right.

I mean, she's not the only extremist in Congress now.

Oh, and well, there were plenty of extremists before, but these, this is.

So this kind of extremists.

And, you know, this isn't, you know, Maxine Waters, who's been around for a thousand years and is obviously insane.

This is, These are three young congresspeople who have been identified as the future of the Democratic Party.

You know, that is,

that's

going to save

or get elected in a majority with this kind of stuff.

And for all the

green jobs thing?

Oh, yeah.

Okay, so all that was released, apparently, all that was released, this is their excuse now, and why Mitch McConnell was sabotaging them, is because all that they had was just a memo, a talking points memo, that we think, you know, green energy is important and we think we should eventually get off fossil fuels.

And that's what everybody signed on to.

Apparently, there is no bill except a resolution that says, hey, we think these things are important.

Not an actual, hey, let's get rid of the planes and let's get rid of the cars.

That's That's at Casio-Cortez.

She put that out.

They're not going to survive.

This

is the best of the Glenn Beck program.

We have Mark and Elizabeth on the phone.

I wanted to bring them on because their story is incredible.

They met, and maybe they can help you,

Andrew.

They met.

Huh?

They got sisters i i i i'm sorry okay uh but they they met uh at mercury one they were part of the leadership program uh and uh so we have mark are you there and elizabeth

i'm here

mark are you there

mark

he's not there uh Our producers say he's there, but he's not there.

So let me just talk to Elizabeth.

Elizabeth.

Hi.

Hi, how are you?

I'm good.

How are are you?

Very good.

So you guys met at this leadership program that we did.

And

tell me about this, because none of us had any idea that there was something

starting there.

Well,

it was kind of one of those things where I think almost everyone in the program, we have a group chat, actually, that we all keep in touch with.

Mark and I just started texting over the group chat and formed this friendship.

So it wasn't, so it didn't happen while you were here in those two weeks.

Did you guys notice each other?

Were you looking across the room going, oh.

I think Mark was, probably more so than I was at that time.

Yeah.

Now, how do you feel about it?

Because you hear you are on national radio talking about your love.

And in the biggest moment of your life, he's abandoned you.

How do you feel about that?

I'm here now.

Oh, he's here now.

He's showing up late.

Yeah, he's showing up late.

That's what men do for doing.

Yeah, so

did you know, Mark, you know, when you were in the leadership program, were you looking and saying, okay, Elizabeth, she will be mine or no one will have her?

Not quite that early.

I was interested.

I think the first time I knew I was interested was the Mercury One ball that year.

You guys were selling the raffle tickets for the car.

Yeah.

And

another girl who was volunteering who had been in the leadership program offered to sell me one.

And I said, great pitch, good practice, glad you are doing this.

I'm going to go buy one from Elizabeth.

Wow.

Wow.

See, that's the kind of thing that you do, Andrew.

If somebody's selling...

Buy cars?

No, if somebody is selling

something

and you think she's attractive, you should go up and say, so how much?

Okay.

And it works well.

Okay.

In certain circumstances.

And then be like, now, if I get like two of these things, what kind of bed are we going to get?

And make it transactional because then the woman will appreciate that I'm good at math.

Yeah.

What do you think, Elizabeth?

Is that the thing for Andrew to?

I mean, he could give it a shot.

I'm going to get two or three cars this weekend.

So

when do you guys get married?

Because

I brought you up on stage at our

event here for the Mercury One Ball just recently.

And you proposed.

And Elizabeth, you had no idea that was coming?

I didn't.

It was pretty cool.

That was a surprise.

It was awesome.

And Mark said, Elizabeth, I have a question to ask you.

And then he never asked the question.

And

that's what I agreed to.

So you didn't ask.

Has he asked?

Has he asked

since?

Yes.

He has asked.

He clarified, and he told me he had all this worked up in his head, and it just didn't come out of his mouth at the time.

Right.

So you agreed to something that you had no idea what you were agreeing to

i i

three times i have it all in writing now though well okay good nice all right good well guys congratulations you're our couple of the year

and we know how special that really is so uh congratulations thanks guys god bless very happy

thank you

uh so uh

uh by the way You can find love.

Maybe you should.

You're too old.

You can get involved.

If you're 18 to 24 years old, Mercury One has a really amazing thing.

It's a two-week leadership training program, and that's what they were both in.

And if you know somebody who is 18 to 24, or if that is you, and you want to learn about leadership, you want to learn about the foundations of America and learn firsthand, you have a rare opportunity to handle the

founding documents yourself and do some research for yourself.

Apparently, not the only thing you're handling at this particular.

Yes, it is.

As she said, it didn't happen until after.

Anyway, mercury1.org slash LTP, mercuryone.org slash ltp.

If you need a hookup spot, no, that's not what that is.

Not what that is.

No.

You sure?

You know what?

And I have a comparable leadership program for models between ages 25 and 40.

So what are you?

It's a Star Trek theme camp about leadership.

So if you're a model 24 to 40, be sure to reach out.

How important is the Star Trek part of the relationship?

Not really, not honestly that big of a deal.

It's a fun thing.

So if she hates it.

You know, this is the give and take thing.

I'm not a huge sports guy.

So I think I'd have to be like, okay, cool.

I'm not going to make you dress up at conventions with me, but I don't have to go to games unless we spawn and our children become quarterbacks.

Then I will watch.

Spawn.

Yeah.

You are romantic.

I just cannot.

Screens Valentine's Day.

Excuse me.

Make spawn.

Okay.

There you go.

Much better.

Andrew Heaton, thank you so much.

Thank you.

You can find his very funny podcast from the Blaze Network, and you can find it wherever podcasts are found.

And it's Something's Off with Andrew Heaton.

And the more you listen, the more you realize: no, there's more than a little something, there's a lot off with Andrew Heaton.

The Blaze Radio Network

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