Maria Shriver: Life-Changing Lessons on Letting Go of Your Past & Creating Your Best Future Now!

Coming up in this incredible part two episode with Maria Shriver.

On the topic of big, I do want to bring up one big thing

that has exploded, which is White Lotus.

How was that?

Seeing your son play such an

interesting and dynamic role?

It makes me almost tear up now thinking about his moment.

He's worked so hard.

I just felt this unbelievable joy for him, unbelievable

just happiness for him that he was having this moment.

How many people were like, whoa, Patrick Schwarzenegger is actually a really good actor,

which means that they thought going in he wasn't.

And it means that they evolved with him and that his work made them change their mind.

And that's really hard to do.

With seeing some of the storylines, seeing him naked on camera, like all the things.

People are like, oh my God, you saw, I'm like, I give birth to him.

It's like not such a, you know,

I've seen him naked often.

I've seen him naked since he was a baby.

There's a poem in I Am Maria called The Child Within that I cried my eyes out reading.

We all need to find our way home, regardless of gender, regardless of age.

We're all in a way in the fight of our lives.

We're all in a way trying to figure out why we're here.

What is our life about?

What difference does it make that we are here?

Will anybody see us?

Will anybody notice us?

Does anything we do matter?

Feeling like you're in your own journey, that you're on your own path, that you're doing what you were put here to do is a beautiful, calming feeling.

And when you feel that,

you will walk, I think, differently in the world.

The wild and me, you say, don't let the Mary Medals believe I'm more virgin than Magdalene.

Consider yourself warned, there's a wildness in me that can't be contained.

Woo!

I was like, wait a minute.

The truth is, I think it's a beautiful time to be a woman, as I say to my daughters.

And I think you can be tender and strong.

You can be smart and sexy.

When you said,

don't let the Mary Metals believe I'm more virgin than Magdalene, consider yourself Warren, there's a wildness in me that can't be contained.

I started giggling because I thought if that was on the dating app, it would go crazy.

If that was like your profile.

Oh, really?

So I'm just going to ask you because I asked this of everybody.

Are you dating anybody?

I'm open.

I'm open to whatever God sends my way.

But I've,

my kids have kidded around going, oh, we should make you a dating app.

I'm like, absolutely not.

I mean, what do you call it?

A dating profile.

But now that I have a line I could put on there, maybe that's a good one.

I used to think that love came only in an intimate, romantic

package.

Yeah.

And it made me miss out.

And so I'm really focused on expanding my notion of love,

expanding the amount of people that are in my open field, so to speak, that bring me love.

And so whomever I end up with, if I do end up with someone that way, they're going to be a village.

They're going to be in a village.

They're going to be so blessed.

I wanted to write a book without,

you know, any grievances about a journey home to myself, which I think is the journey we're all on.

How do we come home to ourselves?

What does that even mean to us?

So it's a book of poems and reflections.

It's a book of wisdom and insecurity.

It's a book of love and loss and longing and finding our way home.

It's a book about life.

Moving humanity forward is her ministry.

Maria Shriver is an Emmy Award-winning, Gracie Award-winning, Peabody Award-winning, Lifetime Achievement Alzheimer's Association Award-winning, journalist, author, and member of the legendary and iconic Shriver and Kennedy families.

She's the author of the brand new, number one one New York Times best-selling book, I Am Maria.

Filled with the most beautiful poetry, it's out now.

Make sure to grab your copy.

She's the founder of the Sunday Paper.

You can get her incredible content at MariaShriversundaypaper.com.

We'll link to it in the show notes.

She's also the former First Lady of California and the founder of the Women's Alzheimer's Movement.

She was married to former governor of California, Arnold Schwarzenegger, and is the daughter of Sergeant Shriver, who founded the the Peace Corps and Eunice Kennedy Shriver who founded the Special Olympics.

She's also the niece of the late President John F.

Kennedy.

She's a mom of four amazing children, Catherine, Patrick, Christina, and Christopher.

And she's a grandma.

And yet, just like you and me, she's separate and independent of all of those jobs and roles and labels.

She is, most powerfully, Maria.

And that is more than enough.

And I want to ask you right now, when you think of all of the roles that you're known for and play in your own life, whether it's mom or friend or wife or sister, daughter, boss, and you strip those away, you're left with who you innately are.

And do you believe right now, in this very moment, that who you are innately is fully enough?

Today, we are talking about how to know it and believe it in your life right now.

And whether today you're listening for yourself or because someone you love shared this episode with you, I want to welcome you to the Jamie Kern Lima Show podcast family.

Thank you so much for being here.

And can you take two seconds and do me a quick favor, hit the subscribe or follow button on the app that you're listening or watching on?

Thank you so much.

It truly means so much to me.

You can also get inspiration in your inbox from me for free.

You can join my newsletter community at jamiekernlema.com.

Also, this incredible podcast episode today, it's not just for you and me.

Please share this with every single person that you know who might need some inspiration today or perhaps a boost in their self-belief.

Because what you're about to hear can truly impact mine, yours, and their life too.

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I do want to bring up one big thing

that has exploded, which is white lotus.

Yes, yes.

Okay, so I saw the video.

I saw the video online that once you you guys were able to share it where

Patrick had let you know he had been cast in it.

I was crying at the table and it was so fun.

And I am so curious.

So I watched it.

I watched it and

how, holy moly.

Okay.

All right.

How does it feel?

How does it feel as a mom?

Because you've been around actors forever.

This is not new.

This is not your first rodeo.

And also, how was that

seeing your son play such a

interesting and dynamic role?

Well, it was, first of all, I didn't know that his fiancé was videotaping that at all, you know, but

it was very,

it makes me almost tear up now thinking about his moment.

He's worked so hard.

You know, he goes to acting lessons every single week.

He goes out for so many roles, you know, that you don't get.

Right.

And then

for him, I knew he had tried out for this role, but I hadn't heard anything, so I assumed he didn't get it.

And so when I saw him whispering to his fiancé at the table, he had just gotten engaged two weeks before.

So when I saw him whispering, I'm like, what are you whispering about?

You know, I don't like whispering at the table.

And he's like, no, nothing, nothing.

I'm I'm like, uh-oh.

You know, I felt, uh-oh, they're pregnant or uh-oh, something happened or uh-oh.

And then he's like, well, I can't, I don't want to say anything.

I can't say anything.

I go, Patrick, you've got to say something.

You can't just say now.

I can't say anything.

And when he told me, I just felt this unbelievable joy for him, unbelievable

just happiness for him that he was having this moment.

And

then to watch him, he went to Thailand for eight months and to see him work so hard and then to watch the arc of that character from everybody going, you know, like, what a jerk to like, oh, my heart breaks for him.

And I said to him in the last episode when I, his, just his facial expression, you know, when the Amy Lew Wood character walked away and left him,

and you could see his face and you could see that his heart broke.

that he had not been seen, that he had not been chosen, that he had not been valued.

It was a heartbreaking moment.

And he

did it so well.

And he acted this kind of range.

And I was so proud for him.

I said this to him actually yesterday.

How many people were like, whoa, Patrick Schwarzenegger is actually a really good actor,

which means that they thought going in he wasn't.

And it means that they evolved with him and that his work made them change their mind.

and that's really hard to do and that's

a really triumphant thing for him to have been able to do and he's worked so hard and I think he's handled himself having a moment like that is challenging you know there's a lot coming at you and you can either crack with it be a jerk with it

or or ride it in an elegant, grateful manner.

And I think he has written it in an elegant, grateful manner.

He's very grateful to his acting teacher, to Mike White, to the people who've acted with him all along the way.

And I think his siblings really supported him in a very loving way, but also like, don't get your head up on this, you know, don't get too high on this, you know, in a fun way.

And his friends, he has an incredible

group of friends who've been with him since kindergarten, preschool.

And

he's really blessed.

And I think,

you know,

he took this moment and he did well with it.

And I'm really proud of him.

And to watch him ride it in such a beautiful, humble, confident way.

And then to

he's going to be married in a few months.

And,

you know, it's a beautiful thing to watch.

Yeah.

With

seeing some of the storylines, storylines seeing him naked on camera like all the things people are like oh my god you saw I'm like I give birth to him like not such a you know I've seen him naked I've seen him naked since he was a baby but

you know I'm just looking at him and his craft really I'm watching him grow because I've watched him you know I think people when they see somebody in a show like that they don't realize how

much leads up to that moment.

You know, they don't realize how hard he's worked or how many roles he hasn't gotten.

Right.

You know, and then when they get a role and then they do it well and then they ride the moment, it's almost like the universe has to come

together for them.

And so to watch that

in anyone's life.

It's like months in Thailand.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Months in Thailand.

Amazing.

And so Mike White obviously is the writer, the creator, the director, the producer.

And

he's obviously incredibly talented

young man.

Yeah.

Well, you know,

there's a poem in I Am Maria called The Child Within that I cried my eyes out reading.

And for anybody who is

who almost like needs to connect with the little girl inside of them,

who's doing maybe healing, on healing journey, learning to go, who am I?

It is

the boy.

Or the little person, right?

That's the thing that I've loved actually about going around the country: how many men

have

come

to these conversations because I think we so often women are better in a way at prioritizing their healing, their emotions.

They're more curious so often.

And I don't think we have given space to men to really have that opening, to allow for those conversations, to allow for their heartbreak, to allow

space for their healing.

We all need to find our way home, regardless of gender, regardless of age.

We're all in a way in the fight of our lives.

We're all in a way trying to figure out why we're here.

What is our life about?

What difference does it make that we are here?

Will anybody see us?

Will anybody notice us?

Does anything we do matter?

And I understand

that journey.

I understand those questions.

And I'm walking alongside you if you're having those questions because those are the questions I had too.

And I think that.

Do you feel like you have answers to those?

Well, for me, but I think everybody

has.

different answers, right?

And everybody asks those, I think, at different times in their lives.

I think I meet a lot of young people today who wonder, will the world even be here when they get to my age?

Does anything matter?

Yes.

Now AI.

Yes.

Does anything matter?

Will they,

does their humanity matter?

You speak about AI.

Is it worth bringing a child into the world today?

Yeah.

Is there such a thing as marriage?

Is it worthwhile?

Does love last?

All of these questions that are now coming up, I think, at all ages.

And so I hope this book will be shared across generations.

I hope people will begin to think about

these

questions way before life smacks them down and they find themselves on a hotel room floor, and that they really do

come to a place where they realize that it they do matter, that their life is important, that they are here for a reason, that they are meant to live out their path, not my path or your path, but their distinct path.

And that it doesn't have to be what their parents or their siblings,

their walk doesn't have to be that walk.

But I think kind of feeling like you're in your

own journey, that you're on your own path, that you're doing what you were put here to do is a beautiful, calming feeling.

And when you feel that,

you will walk, I think, differently in the world.

And you will be able to, most importantly, hear people who tell you to do this, this, and that and go, I'm good.

I'm walking where I need to be walking.

Yeah.

You talk in the book about your own healing journey, about different modalities, and about even getting permission

to be who you are, which I'm going to ask you about in a second.

But one of the things I love so much about this book, so many of us,

not that we hide parts of us, but

we don't like express them.

Maria, in this book, you share so many different things

so vulnerably, so openly.

I know I saw the interview with you at Oprah where she just like said she cried reading this that you had shared so much because she already knows, but you guys are best friends for you to share.

There's so much you share.

And why I'm so excited, one of the many reasons I'm so excited about I am Maria is because I feel like people read, I'm imagining the person reading it man or woman who's gonna read it and somehow have permission to just open up and just like with themselves and tap into parts of themselves I want to call out one one of the poems in there

called the wild in me miss maria shriver okay

the wild in me you say don't let the merry metals believe I'm more virgin than Magdalene.

Consider yourself warned, there's a wildness in me that can't be contained.

Woo!

I was like, wait a minute.

So, okay.

One of my many favorites in there, because I feel like we're just, every one of us has that in us.

And I feel like.

Well, I think, you know, look, the truth is, I think it's a beautiful time to be a woman, as I say to my daughters.

And I think you can be tender and strong.

You can be smart and sexy.

When I was coming up in journalism, you had to have big shoulder pads, be buttoned up, be serious, be tough, and be like little men, right?

Because you weren't allowed to be all of who you are.

And I think today you can be a loving, nurturing, nourishing mom.

And if you're going to go and advocate at Capitol Hill, you've got to be strong.

You've got to be, you know, wild in a way.

You've got to be...

incredibly confident.

And I think we now live in a time where you're okay holding holding all of these different parts of yourself, the great security and insecurity, your tenderness and your toughness, your smartness and your sexiness, your sexuality and your sensuality.

And I think that's what it means to be a fully evolved

woman for me.

Or I say to, you know, my sons, you can be strong and gentle.

You also can hold these different paradoxes.

And so I, you know, I be very kind of tender, and but when I'm gonna go and speak on behalf of women's health and research, or I'm gonna go speak on behalf of Alzheimer's or caregivers,

I'm gonna put on a different suit and I'm gonna walk a different way because I have a job to do.

Yeah.

And it's a different job than when I'm putting on a diaper.

Yeah.

You know.

Well, I read the, I love reading the physical book while also listening to the audiobook.

So that's interesting.

I was just doing both.

I love it because I feel like it takes root in in me more.

And when you read it, my son is saying that he's listening to it on audio.

On audio.

I love it because you read it.

I love it.

When you said that line, consider yourself, or wait, when you said,

don't let the Mary Metals believe I'm more virgin than Magdalene,

consider yourself Warren.

There's a wildness in me that can't be contained.

I started giggling because I thought if that was on the dating app, it would go crazy.

If that was like your profile.

Oh, really?

So I'm just going to ask you because I asked this of everybody.

everybody.

Are you dating anybody?

We need to pause for a super brief break.

And while we do, take a moment to share this episode with every single person that you know who this could inspire.

Because this conversation can truly be the words and inspiration they need to hear today to keep going, to remember that they matter, and to feel less alone and more enough, more connected, and more worthy.

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And now, more of this incredible conversation together.

So, I'm just going to ask you because I ask this of everybody,

are you dating anybody?

I don't know.

I've never been on a dating app in my, in my life.

I was actually, I was with Annie Lamotte in San Francisco on my tour and her husband, Neil, and they were saying that they met on a dating app.

And so I was, I'm always, I'm a frustrated matchmaker myself.

And

I'm a big believer in.

relationships and love.

And

I've just kind of gotten to the place now where I'm thinking, oh, you know, I don't know, maybe, but my life is really full.

I'm not looking,

but I'm open.

I'm open to whatever God sends my way.

But I've,

my kids have kidded around going, we should make you a dating app.

I'm like, absolutely not.

I mean, a date, what do you call it, a dating profile.

But now that I have a line I could put on there, maybe that's a good one.

No, no, no.

No,

I'm good.

I'm finally good on my own.

And that's taken a tremendous amount.

And I have a lot of,

I have a beautiful life that I'm deeply grateful for and that feels

really good and really full and full of love.

I used to think that love came only in an intimate, romantic

package.

And it made me miss out on all the love that was being offered to me through my friends friends and through other people.

And I've now realized that there's so many different ways to access the love that is there for us, the love that exists for us, because we're so focused on, quote, dating, right, or your marriage partner, and that nobody can give you everything you're looking for.

And so I'm really focused on expanding my notion of love,

expanding the amount of people that are in my open field, so to speak, that bring me love.

And so, whomever I end up with, if I do end up with someone that way, they're going to be a village.

They're going to be in a village.

They're going to be so blessed.

So blessed and so lucky.

You know, what's been interesting is I've gone out into,

you know, whatever, the tour, or out into

different states and different cities.

Universally, people are experiencing their own lives.

People are

talking about

how do they reinvent themselves after the loss of a spouse or after a divorce.

How do people,

the questions that come from the crowds are, I just lost my job, or I just retired, or my company downsized, or my husband died, or I'm estranged from my kid, or I don't share my husband's political opinions, and it's causing a lot of trouble,

or I'm struggling with a child with mental health.

People come up to me all the time about my mother was just diagnosed with Alzheimer's.

Can you find me a neurologist?

Where's the best home that I can put my dad or mom in?

Is there a clinical trial that I can put my parent in?

Where do I get a diagnosis?

You know, where do I get a caregiver?

I have,

you know, I can't find a doctor who will help me with perimenopause.

Can Can you direct me to a women's health doctor?

Can you help me with a daughter who has PCOS?

And so I know that that's what people are experiencing, or I too have heartbreak.

I too have gone to therapy.

I too have tried plant medicine.

I too have been to a psychic.

I too, you know, have a deep faith.

Or I've lost my faith, or I've dropped out of the church, or I'm trying to find my way.

way back to the church.

Do you know a good church which tells me that that's, you know, people want to live meaningful lives.

I talk a lot about what is a meaningful life.

I talk a lot about what is a brain healthy life.

But, you know, I think at the end of the day, what is a meaningful life and how do I live it?

And I think that's what people are trying to do.

They're trying to find love.

They're trying to keep love.

They're trying to be a good parent.

They're trying to put food on the table.

They're trying to be good sons and daughters in their 50s.

Yeah.

You know, they're trying to take care of their parents, which is really hard and really expensive.

So that's what people are talking about.

While also being parents, like in between.

So that's what people come up to talk to me about.

Yeah.

You know, and all of those

questions,

they're heartbreaking.

They're all heartbreaking and they also have healing potential.

I think to your point earlier, you know, so people at all ages are also just starting to talk about healing, just starting to talk about their own healing journey.

And Aya Maria, you share so candidly about so many.

I want everyone to pick it up and read it, so I'm not going to give away.

And I don't want people to be scared.

You know, so many people said to me, oh my gosh, I'm scared of poetry.

I'm scared.

You know, it's not the poetry that you might have learned in college that you're like, what does that mean?

This is, my daughter calls it reporter poetry, but it's, it's, you know, you'll be able to read it without a doubt of understanding it.

Oh, yeah.

And you can do it too.

And I'm a big believer that we can all write our way forward.

And I think I'm also a big believer that in order to move yourself forward, you have to understand what happened in your life and who shaped you.

Not with, as somebody gave me the greatest compliment, they said, this is a book about grief without any grievances.

And that's beautiful.

Which is, I thought to myself,

I said, wow, I'm going to use that line because I could never have come up with it myself.

But I wanted to write a book without,

you know, any grievances about a journey home to myself, which I think is the journey we're all on.

How do we come home to ourselves?

What does that even mean to us?

So it's a book of poems and reflections.

It's a book of wisdom and insecurity.

It's a book of love and loss and longing and finding our way home.

It's a book about life.

And how to find your own way home.

Right.

Okay, two final questions, then we'll wrap.

You mentioned in the book, you talk about your journey of healing.

And there's a whole section in the beginning of the book before all the poetry starts.

And in there, you share, and I think this is one of the things Oprah said, she was shocked that you shared

about

going to

all different types of modalities of healing from shaman to plant medicine journey to crystals to a convent to all of it.

And what I'm curious about is: of all the things you tried, which ones do you feel worked?

I think they all worked.

You think they all worked?

They all worked, yes.

I think they all worked at different times.

Yeah.

And I think I've always been incredibly curious, which is why journalism was so great for me.

Yeah.

I've always been interested in what is out there that can help me.

Who is out there that can help me?

Who can I learn from?

Yeah.

I'm always looking to who can I learn from?

Who's living life in a way that I want to emulate.

So I look at nuns and they're doing things that I think, wow,

I want to emulate some of what they're doing out in the streets, in the work of social justice, helping other people.

Also, living in community.

I think, wow, that's, and being very calm and prayerful and meditative and contemplative.

Richard Rohr, I look at him, contemplatives in action.

I'm like, I want to learn from that.

Jack Kornfield, Trudy Goodman, Annie Lamotte, writers, Mary Oliver, poets.

There's so many people to learn from, which is why books are so powerful, because people put their journeys down with the hope of helping you and yours, with the hope of helping you find your way home.

And so Pema Shodren helped me.

Anne Mara Lindberg helped me.

Mary Oliver helped me.

My friends helped me.

Nun Mother Dolores helped me.

Sister Joan Chidester helped me.

All of these people helped me and continue and continue to help me.

And

that's so beautiful.

And I think, you know, for every person listening or watching, I just want to call that out.

I've always loved the idea that success leaves clues and that, and about being a lifelong student and just the gift, right?

The gift of

all of that.

And for everyone watching or listening who's like, wow, like, okay she has all these titles and awards you know peabody award emmys award yeah i'm lifetime achievement award for the alzheimer's association so many awards gracie award all of it all of the titles and what your mom did and your dad did and your family and just all of it and you're to the place where you're like i am maria that is enough and so for the person listening who wants to fill in their name and i love when you say on the sunday paper and in so many places I am Maria.

Who are you?

Like nice to meet you.

And so for the person who's listening and watching us right now and who's like, huh, actually, I kind of want to, yes, cherish all the things in my life, but also go, well, wait a minute, who am I?

And how do I,

whether it start on my own journey to believing I'm enough, or how do I just truly embrace that who I am is enough?

What do you say to them?

Well, I think just try it.

Just start by saying, I am Jamie.

Pause, full stop, stop right there.

You know, I am Maria.

And just try that on even in front of the mirror, just saying just that, introducing yourself just that way, and then holding,

holding right there with it.

And you don't have to fill it in in any way.

Yeah.

And I think that people, when you start filling in, like I never fill in with I'm this, that, or the other.

I'm, you know, a woman.

I'm a woman in evolution.

I'm curious, right?

I'm loving.

I'm kind.

I'm open.

I'm a friend, right?

I'm loved and I'm loved.

I'm, I'm trying to figure it out.

I'm strong.

I'm weak.

I'm tough.

I'm tender.

I'm all of these things.

Who are you?

And I think that, you know, just holding.

I have chills.

I have chills with you saying that.

Oh, really?

Yeah.

And even the pause of that too.

Yeah.

Saying, I am

Jamie.

Full stop.

Maria Shriver.

I love you.

Thank you for being here.

Thank you so much.

I want, God bless you.

I want, thank you.

And I want to say this.

Thank you for your friendship.

Thank you for your leadership.

Thank you for your championship of things that matter so much.

Thank you for being a living, breathing example to all of us of just how we can embrace who we are and also put our faith and our love and our calling and our action and our anointing in motion.

Thank you for all of that.

Amen.

Amen.

Remember, this episode's not just for you and me.

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And before you go, I want to share some words with you that couldn't be more true.

You, right now, exactly as you are, are enough and fully worthy.

You're worthy of your greatest hopes, your wildest dreams, and all the unconditional love in the world.

And it is an honor to welcome welcome you to each and every episode of the Jamie Kern-Lima Show.

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You are worthy, you are loved, you are love.

I love you.

And I cannot wait to join you on the next episode of the Jamie Kern Lima Show.

In life, you don't soar to the level of your hopes and dreams.

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When you build your self-worth, you change your entire life.

And that's exactly why I wrote my new book, Worthy, how to believe you are enough and transform your life for you.

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Are you ready to unleash your greatness and step into the person you were born to be?

Imagine a life with zero self-doubt and unshakable self-worth.

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Imagine what you'd do if you fully believed in you.

It's time to find out with worthy.

Who you spend time around is so important as energy is contagious and so is self-belief.

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And please note, I'm not a licensed therapist and this podcast is is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional.