RQ Network Feed Drop - The Grotto: 1: Buried Alive

everyone, it's Anusha here.

Today, we are sharing an episode from one of the brilliant podcasts on the RQ network, The Grotto.

The Grotto is a liminal horror podcast with original music and a full cast that explores the thin line between grief, pain, mourning, and loss.

This is the first episode, called Buried Alive.

It follows Matt, who after being struck by a recent loss, turns to Spelunking for solace.

As Matt battles grief, he questions if the caves are playing tricks, or if something else lurks within.

To listen to the rest of the Grotto, you can click on the link in the description, or search for The Grotto wherever you get your podcasts.

Or you can find more information on rusticwill.com or thegrottopod.com.

Have fun and enjoy the episode.

Hey everybody, Athen here.

I'd like to apologize.

I know this is not Magnus Protocol.

However, this is my show The Grotto and I think you'll enjoy it.

If you don't want to listen, just hit the skip button like 200 times.

This is the pilot episode of our show called Buried Alive.

There are currently two seasons and a third one coming soon.

If you enjoy it, you can go check out the rest over on our feed, The Grotto.

Otherwise, I hope you enjoy.

Thanks for listening.

This episode contains some loud and sudden noises.

Time stamps in the description.

In addition, it also contains some depictions of gore as well as some claustrophobia.

Listener discretion is advised.

Okay.

It's fine.

Just.

It's fine.

You got this, Matt.

Just focus.

You got this.

Just.

Alright.

Here we go.

Let me start from the beginning because the last 24 hours have been.

I'm pretty sure it'll take me a while to explain.

See, I've gone through some shit recently.

It's not the kind of shit I'm about to tell you about.

I mean, just unfortunately, normal human shit.

Obviously,

you know about since since you've been gone,

I've become a little bit of a depressive mess.

My therapist recommended that I record something.

If not for anybody else, for me.

And so I thought the easiest person to talk to was you.

And so I thought I'd talk to you.

Yeah, everybody's been bugging me about it when I answer their calls, which until lately has been never.

I know they mean well, and nobody's trying to make me feel bad, but I I get stuck in these loops where I'm not feeling anything, then I feel bad that I'm not feeling anything, and it's not, it's not important, I'm rambling.

The point is, David really dove in, helped get me out of my funk, and forced me to pick up a hobby.

So that's what I did.

I started spelunking.

Honestly, I've always been interested in it.

There's something about the way rocks look

from the inside.

That's a lie.

You know that.

I hate it.

David's really into it though, and considering my hobbies were vodka, Coke, and Adderall, I figured it's better better if we don't do my current thing.

So,

oh, right, you don't know David that well either.

So, David's that guy from work.

We used to work together.

I don't work there anymore, obviously, but I still go into the restaurant to...

I like the food.

You liked the food, too.

David's into caves and all that outdoorsy stuff.

He has one of those natural rock climbing bodies with the muscles and stuff.

And I have the opposite of that, as you know, which is one of those bodies without.

Anyway, I'm rambling again.

The point is, he convinced me to go exploring.

As you know, this is the town to do that in because the whole town's basically one big fucking tunnel.

You have the public tunnels, you have the caverns, you have the closed-offs, you got the underwater cavern.

I mean, it's if you wanted to do it, no better place to live.

I wanted to start

small,

so we went to the grotto.

Hush.

Fuck, sorry, you don't know about the grotto either.

So, you know that small cave off 7th Meadow right by City Hall?

It got declared a historic site by the city.

No shit hits historic.

It's a fucking cave.

It was here before us, and it'll be here after us unless we, you know, tectonic plates or some bullshit.

I don't know, it's called the grotto now.

David said it was ridiculous to pack as much as I did, but to be honest, I really just wanted to get familiar with the weight of the bag.

Plus, you know me, any excuse for retail therapy I'll take, especially if somebody else is paying for it.

It never occurred to me how much stuff you need to take with you for cave exploration.

There's the obvious equipment, gloves, rope, flashlight, obviously, but there's way more than that.

You know, I actually bought a knife, and you know me, I'm squeamish.

I do not like knives.

To be honest, I'm surprised 127 hours didn't turn me off to the idea of cave exploration entirely.

But as awful as it must be cutting your arm off, I'm pretty sure James Franco would have been a ton worse off if he hadn't brought a knife and I wasn't gonna be that guy.

He also needed a good headlamp, harness, carabiners, and just a bunch of other stuff we ended up putting in David's bag.

You know, it was silly in hindsight.

The grotto is underwhelmingly small.

There aren't any passageways that aren't completely sealed at this point, and it's more of a graffiti trap than anything else.

On the outside, people were putting everything.

There was this large dragon, there was symbols, there was names, there was hearts with letters in them signifying love, probably young.

On the inside, it was pretty much the same thing.

Although, I did notice on one of the walls this really cool diamond that I thought about getting on my arm.

David said it was stupid.

Fuck does David know?

We entered the cave, and as I started to wander around, I felt comforted.

I thought about how much you'd have enjoyed it, to be honest, and I'm really sorry we didn't do things like this together.

I brushed my hand along the wall of the cave, rough but slick at the same time.

It reminded me of the wall of your dorm back in college.

How we almost got expelled for painting it.

And you know, it almost smelled like you.

No, no, not that you smell like caves.

I don't know.

I got a little emotional, okay?

Do you remember when we did shrooms about a year ago?

This was...

nothing like that.

But do you remember the next couple days, how everything felt current?

It felt exactly like that.

I'm not trying to say the grotto was a religious experience for me, but I will say I was immediately hooked.

Apparently, I fucking love caves.

Who would have known?

So we started planning our next outing at the diner.

David started saying, You think the grotto was cool?

Man, you have to come with me to this spot by the bay.

It has these beautiful natural formations, and there are these pockets where you can just sit for hours.

Oh, oh, wait, let's just, let's go tomorrow.

I get off early.

Hey, I just, I just started doing this.

Don't you think I should, like, I don't know, practice more?

And by the bay, aren't those all, those are all barricaded.

I feel like we're not supposed to go in there.

Like, I'm not sure.

No, no, no, Maddie.

It's fine.

It's fine.

They have to block them off.

It's just to avoid liability because there's some sections you have to kind of finagle your way through.

It's not a safety thing.

It's just easier in case some kids hurt themselves.

Plus, worst case, I can make sure nothing bad happens to you.

I promise.

Okay.

Also, my dinner after.

Okay.

Also, just say yes because I ask nicely.

Okay, fine.

Also, just say yes because I'm not going to be able to do it.

David,

it's fine.

I'll come.

It actually sounds like it could be kind of fun.

It's a date.

So anyway, I was talking to Violet at work, and she was just going on and on about these birds outside her room.

Fast forwarding, the car ride was shockingly uneventful.

David's music taste is not exactly my style.

It's okay, but he's a really big fan of the doors, and it's fine.

fine i liked the company i just like sound in general and just being around people and i haven't had much of that lately so i had a good time in hindsight but it's okay it's whatever

i remember there was an energy in the air when we got out of the car that something wasn't quite right and david told me that the water level had risen which affected his normal route to get into the cavern He said he knew of another entrance, he hadn't really gone through it very much, but it's worth looking into.

And we did that.

As we took our first steps into the cavern, I realized whatever I had felt in the grotto, this feeling was the complete opposite.

I don't want to say foreboding, because it sounds cheesy, but it was...

foreboding.

Foreboding's the word.

That's the word I'm going to use.

We descended into the cave further, David leading the way, the most familiar of the two of us, with climbing and the path we were taking.

He had started out boisterous like his normal self, but the further we got, he started whispering.

He warned me, the vibrations can make the cave collapse.

You know, David, if you ever end up listening to this, that's the sort of thing you should mention before we enter the fucking cave.

But anyway.

We reached a section where, to continue, we had to go through a passage that was small, absurdly small, smaller than me.

I

did not react well.

To be honest, but David assured me it was fine.

He had done this before, and he'd teach me how to do it.

David laid down on the the ground and walked me through the steps.

The first thing to do was tie my bag around my ankle, that way I could push through the cavern while still bringing my bag with me, because if I had it on my back, I'd be too big to fit through.

He told me to move on the exhales, that way, as little of my body was filled up with oxygen as possible so I would fit better.

He told me to feel my heartbeat, that way I didn't panic, and he told me to clear my mind so I didn't freeze.

I expelled all the air in my lungs and pushed forward.

Pause, breathe, Repeat.

This went on for about a minute until I reached the end.

David emerged behind me and we had entered a new section of the cave.

There was a large rumbling outside.

We couldn't be too far from the surface and it sounded like a storm had begun.

I noticed a small passageway to my right with a familiar-looking symbol at the end.

Deviating from David, I walked towards it to investigate.

It was a small red diamond, about eight inches tall.

I had seen it in the grotto.

Whoever did that was here?

Didn't make any sense.

I turned to yell to David: Hey, look what I found!

And I

feel the weight

of these mistakes and these boulders that I carry.

And as I

feel it in my blood

I feel the stones they bury me again

Bury alive

I fell to the floor of the cave as the cavern collapsed behind me, completely unable to hear David at this point.

As panic began to set in, I reached out my arms.

I brushed my hand along the wall of the cave, rough, but slick from the blood from my palms.

I felt a kind of fear that I don't think I've ever felt before and hopefully won't feel since.

It started in my stomach and traveled to my throat, my hands, my legs.

Fear is not really the right word.

This might actually be what terror is.

It was dark.

Every breath I took felt heavy, probably from dust kicked up by the collapse.

As I navigated the section I was in, I found my escape.

A crawl space significantly smaller than I was.

As I laid down on the floor and tied my bag around my ankle, I reminded myself what David had told me.

Move on the exhales.

Feel your heartbeat.

Calm your mind.

I expelled all the air in my lungs and pushed forward.

Pause.

breathe, repeat.

Each time I caught my breath, it was a combination of relief and agony as the sharp walls of the cave compressed my body.

After about 45 seconds of this, I made one last push and did not move.

My bag was caught behind me, still tied around my ankles.

I tried to reposition with no luck.

Panicked, I twisted to try to reach for a better angle, and as I moved, I felt a sharp thump of air enter my side, right by my seventh rib.

I tried to reach down reactively, unable to get my arm through.

Desperate, I tried one more time.

Pause.

Breathe.

Push.

Tear.

Relief.

I collapsed on the floor of the new section I had entered, breathing heavily now that I was finally able to.

I reached down, hot and slick with the blood coming from my side.

I was exhausted.

I laid there for what felt like forever.

I heard you whispering.

I looked around, and I had entered a section of the cave with a moderately sized body of water on the side.

Right on the edge of the water was you.

You were crying, or maybe I was.

It felt like a funeral, but it can't have been because you're dead and I'm in a cave.

I knew from my research online that two factors were playing here, the first of which being oxygen, or lack thereof.

You see, the level of depth that we had reached in the cavern, coupled with the collapse from earlier, I could almost taste the recycled breath as I inhaled.

Maybe I imagined it, but I could tell that I was getting woozy.

The second thing, and probably more important and should have been first on the list in hindsight, was the blood loss.

I could still feel the pain from my side and it was slick all the way down to my legs.

Apparently, hallucinations can be caused by a multitude of things.

Hallucination, an experience involving the apparent perception of something not pleasant.

Lack of oxygen, the aforementioned shrooms earlier in the episode, blood flow or lack thereof in this case.

It makes sense that I was hallucinating in my final moments, and it makes sense that if I was gonna see anybody, I'd see you.

Struggling and unable to sit upright, I crawled towards the grave and watched as you descended into the water, gone from my vision.

I reached it and picked up the note.

Hi, Matt.

It's me.

It's Emily.

God, that is such a stupid way way to open up a letter.

Obviously, it's me.

My name is right there.

I know it's been a while since I last wrote.

Too long, honestly.

I feel a little bad about it, actually.

Almost a year, I think.

But I know that

if there's one person who would understand, it would be you.

You always did seem to understand.

I feel like I'm going crazy.

I'm not sure if I ever really fully got over you.

And honestly, I'm feeling like I would be lucky if I never did.

Your visits make it harder.

I'm sure that after enough sleep without you showing up, I'd eventually move on.

But

honestly,

I might be more scared of that than anything else that's happened.

You're like a collapse at the entrance of a cave.

You keep blocking the way of anyone else trying to get in.

And

worst of all,

I don't want you to leave.

Somehow, even dead, you're still better than anybody else left alive.

Okay,

this is probably going to sound crazy, but

I've felt you more lately.

I think you're getting close.

I'll see you soon, okay?

Yours forever.

Emily.

I was...

familiar with this note.

I hadn't read it before, but I had almost written the same one a thousand times since you left.

You spoke of loss.

Losing me.

Losing sanity.

Losing sleep.

I thought about how unfair it was that we were both being punished for nothing.

Me to live without you.

And you stuck to mourn me in death.

I thought you were free, but maybe not.

As I laid down next to the water, I noticed a small, uneven light breaking through the surface, probably originating about eight feet down, but there really was no way to tell.

With newfound strength, I pushed myself into the water.

The first thing I realized was how cold it was.

The second thing I noticed was my blood pooling, changing the color.

Pause.

Don't breathe.

Push.

Repeat.

As I swam towards the light, I thought of a lot of things.

How I might be imagining it.

I thought of you.

I thought about how cold the water was when we crashed that night.

Or

when I crashed.

I thought about how sorry I am.

And I thought about David.

I reached the light.

Love of mine.

you will die.

I'm close behind.

I will follow you into the dark.

No blinding lights or tunnels to gates of wide

hands clasped tight

if heaven has a sight,

they both are satisfied.

Luminate the nose on their fake fake and see sides.

There's no one beside you, no soul in the bikes.

I'll follow you into the dark.

Catholic school, fishes as Roman rule.

My knuckles were bruised

by a lady in black.

Got off my tongue,

she told me sign.

Heaven and hell a sign

that both are satisfied.

I'll make them notes on their facing

signs.

If there's no one beside you, when your soul embarks,

I'll follow you into the dark.

Love of mine,

you will die

But I

close behind

Suddenly, no longer in the water, I hit the ground hard in the new room I had entered.

Barely conscious, I looked around, surveying my surroundings.

The first and last thing that caught my eye was a red diamond, approximately eight inches in height, about 20 feet away from me, with a small dot in the center.

I was in the grotto.

I passed out.

I woke up in a hospital bed.

David was freaking out.

Apparently, he had found a way out of the cave and gone looking for me all night.

Somebody must have found me and brought me back to town, although I have no memory of it.

I tried to explain my hallucinations to him, but none of it makes sense.

The doctors confirmed the obvious.

I had lost a substantial amount of blood.

Plus, with the lack of oxygen, I was in a bad way when they found me.

I was in the hospital for about seven days.

I'm not saying that it was a religious experience for me, but I cried a lot thinking of what had happened.

I realized that in all my time missing you, I hadn't properly mourned you, and it was time for me to do that.

But more than anything else in that moment, I wanted to go home.

I was tired.

David drove.

When we arrived at the apartment, I insisted I was fine, much to David's protest.

He eventually left to go to work.

I climbed the steps to the third floor and entered my apartment, having been unlocked from the previous day.

I walked into the apartment and immediately collapsed to the floor.

I didn't want to move anymore.

I laid on my back, took a deep breath, and thought of the cave.

As terrified as I was in those moments, all I wanted to do now was hear you whisper again.

After a very long moment, I got up and forced myself into the shower.

It's weird to me how clean hospitals are, but they still make you feel gross when you leave, and I was in there for about an hour, probably.

Once I had finished and entered the living room, I noticed the bag that I had left by the door.

It was the bag of everything I had on me when the hospital found me, plus my clothes they had changed me out of.

I brought the bag with me to the kitchen and started throwing away everything cavern-related.

I realized spelunking is probably not for me considering my second time I almost died.

It's probably a sign I shouldn't ignore.

I reached in and pulled out my climbing bag, which I left by the trash can to be taken out at a later date.

I saw my clothes.

It's weird to me the hospital didn't clean them.

They were still caked in my blood, mainly my pants.

I reached into the pockets and started pulling my items out: my keys, my wallet, my phone,

and

a note.

It's from you.

Thank you for listening to episode one of the Grotto, Buried Alive.

Visit the Grotto feed to listen to more episodes.

How do I know there are more episodes if this is episode one?

Because this is a new outro recorded specifically for Rusty Quill Feed.

This is not the original outro.

The original outro talked about Patreon.

Don't go to the Patreon.

We're on hiatus.

Instead, visit thegrottopod.com forward slash Discord to connect.

I've been hanging from the galaxy like I'm extra hollow.

I can feel my bones breaking.

And I don't know the way out.

The episode's done.

The outro's just long for the pilot.

So

I've been hunting for the answers.

Comments getting trace without an egg.

Can you leave me home now?

Hush.

Maybe I need

to quiet down.

Maybe I need

your pain right now.

Maybe I need

voices settled down.

Place is solid ground.

Hush.

To listen to more of this brilliant series, you can click on the link in the the description, or search for the Grotto wherever you get your podcasts.

Or you can find more information on RusticWhirl.

com or the Grottopod.

com.

Thanks for listening.