The Moth Radio Hour: Late Night

Truth or dare?

How about both?

This fall, the Moth is challenging what it means to be daring.

We're not just talking about jumping out of airplanes or quitting your job, we're talking about the quiet courage to be vulnerable, the bold decisions to reveal the secret that changed everything.

This fall, the Moth main stage season brings our most powerful stories to live audiences in 16 cities across the globe.

Every one of those evenings will explore the singular theme of daring, but the stories and their tellers will never be the same.

So here's our dare to you.

Experience the moth main stage live.

Find a city near you at themoth.org slash daring.

Come on, we dare you.

AutoTrader is powered by auto intelligence, the hyper-personalized way to buy a car.

AutoTrader's tools sync with your exact budget and preferences to tailor the car shopping experience totally to you.

Budgeting lets you input your info to see listings in your price range.

Search and inventory helps zero in on your dream car.

You can choose from new or pre-owned, the style of the car, and features like engine size, color, all the way down to whether you want a trailer hitch.

Go ahead and get picky.

Don't worry about scrolling endlessly.

AutoTrader powered by auto intelligence only shows you vehicles based on what you can afford and what you want.

And pricing shows you which listings are the best deals.

So you can feel like you're winning the negotiation without negotiating.

You can even choose how to close the deal at home, at the dealership, wherever.

AutoTrader powered by auto intelligence makes the process of buying a car less of a process.

Try it today.

Visit auto trader.com to find your perfect ride.

You know, there's something special about stories.

Whether it's a personal tale that brings laughter or a documentary that tugs at the heartstrings, the right story can transport anyone.

That's the magic of Prime.

It's a place where stories come to life.

Amazon Prime isn't just about fast delivery, though it definitely makes life easier.

It's about the stories available to stream on Prime Video, the music that sets the mood, and even those spontaneous discoveries, like finding a podcast or show that feels perfectly timed.

There have been moments spent diving into stories that keep the night going, listening to music that resonates deeply, or getting getting things delivered to stay inspired.

Prime helps fuel passion and keeps the connection strong to the stories that matter.

So, for anyone always looking for new stories, new experiences, or new ways to be inspired, Prime has it all.

Whatever you're into, it's on Prime.

From streaming to shopping, it's on Prime.

Visit amazon.com/slash Prime to get more out of whatever you're into.

Amazon.com/slash Prime.

This is the Moth Radio Hour.

I'm Sarah Austin-Janess.

My mother used to say, nothing good happens after midnight.

But is that really true?

Is that something all parents say to inspire you to get home before curfew?

When some folks are getting ready to end their day, others are just getting started.

In this episode, stories that all take place late, late at night.

We start with the story of a high school sophomore who attempts to surprise a fellow student he has a crush on, and the attempt lasts all night long.

Gary Daniel shared this with us as part of a showcase with the Moth's high school program.

Here's Gary live at the Moth.

So, love.

Love is so beautiful, but

it can get you killed.

so

I was I'm about to do the craziest thing I have ever done in my life and it was to see a girl that I like

that I met in ninth grade when she was in 10th grade and now I'm a senior she already graduated and I don't see her anymore so I want to see her so I decided to go to New Jersey to

Even though I didn't know the address, I decided to surprise her.

Yeah.

That was not the smartest idea.

And yeah, so I had to go to the terminal bus and

I didn't take any charger.

My GPS was on the whole time and I was listening to music and my phone just was just dying.

So I got to the terminal bus and

terminal bus, it was so big that for me it looks like an airport.

with hundreds of buses to take and I was so lost that I had to ask somebody, yo, I want to get to New Jersey, what should I do?

And

he was like, yo, what part of New Jersey you want to go?

And I was like, I just told you I want to go to New Jersey.

And his face was like, damn, this guy is really lost.

So

I have to give him my phone with the address because I didn't even know how to pronounce the place that I was going and I still don't know how to pronounce it

and

he took me to the right place the right bus and

I didn't even know that I had to pay for a bus I was just depending on my school metro card

So I was lucky.

I was lucky that the next the day before I asked my mom for a haircut

for money to get a haircut, which I never did.

Sorry, mom.

But that was good because I used the money to get into the bus.

So

when I got to the line, I realized that that line was bigger than the Washington Bridge.

Like, I spent an hour in that line.

And when I finally got to the bus, and there was only one seat left, and a woman next to it and she was just looking at me like saying,

don't even think about sitting next to me.

And we started like talking about telepathy and I was like, I don't care.

I'm going to sit there because I've been waiting for an hour and I'm tired.

I'm going to sit there.

I sit in there and

my GPS stopped working.

And this woman was looking at me the whole time.

And I just was in panic.

So I thought the bus was already past the place that I want to go and I got off earlier.

And my GPS for some reason started working again and I realized that I was two hours away from her house

and I was just lost.

And I realized that

Love is really blind because it makes you think that you it makes you do things that you never thought you would do crazy things

and i was able to see the whole new york city and i was like damn this is beautiful but it it will be more beautiful if i could see her instead

and i took that moment to tell myself

what the hell i just did

And I just kept walking and walking and I was so hungry that I heard my starman saying like

feed me please

man you're gonna die if you don't feed me

so um

my phone was like one percent it was like one minute before it dies and I and I die with it

and I and I took the last minutes just to ask just to call her and at least heard her voice like my it was like my last words

and I told her

I patiently said yo I lost please help me

and it was just at just at that moment that my phone died

so

I was just sitting in front of

a building hoping that somebody would help me.

And the people was just walking by me, like they didn't care.

And there it was even one guy that gave me one dollar.

I appreciated at least something.

So

it started raining and I said

I'm going to a building, somebody's building, even though that I can get arrested.

I don't care.

I gotta find a place to sleep, though.

So I went to the last floor and

it was not as good as my bed, but it was something at least.

And

next day I woke up and I was totally a mess.

I had a headache, my bag was hurting, and I told myself, is this really how I want to surprise her?

So

I went to a store so that I can get a charge or something.

And there were some Dominicans from my country and they were like, yo, que lo que mani túgo mgo tutá.

That means, how are you?

And I told him, yo, I'm lost in another state.

I was sleeping, I was sleeping in the stairs, but I'm good.

I'm happy to be alive, at least.

So

once my phone finally, once my phone finally got, my GPS was on, and I realized that I was literally next to her house.

I don't know how

I get there, but I was next to her house.

And I called her and I told her,

I'm here.

Can you please pick me up?

Because I don't know what I am.

All I know is that I'm around your house.

And she was like, I'm sick.

I can't.

And I told her, so you're telling me that I came all the way to New Jersey to see her, you telling me that you're sick.

And

obviously, she thought it was a joke.

And I told her, can you please see through the window if I can find you?

And she told me, and she was like shaking her hand.

And it was like the best moment for me.

I was like, I finally got it.

And

she told me, yeah, you're you're really crazy.

So I went to her house,

we ate some Papas, cone, salami, and

she gave me some chocolate because I was really cold.

And

although she's not here, I just want to

thank her to

because

she has sent me to go to prom with me.

And

I'm not done.

So

I don't know what they always think when I say this.

So

since this is being recorded, I just want to tell you that you're the most beautiful girl I ever met.

And

even though you might not feel the same for me, I just want to let you know that I love you.

That was Gary Daniel.

Gary lives in the Bronx and he says he spent the past year meditating, studying martial arts, and reading a lot.

He's also excited to tell more stories now that we can get back out in the world again.

I asked Gary, what advice would you give to people out there who want to surprise their crushes?

And he said, do not risk your life to impress someone.

It's not necessary.

Instead, muster the courage to tell them how you feel directly.

If they reject you, the right person will come at the right moment.

By the way, Gary and his crush did go to the prom, so his elaborate stunt worked.

And to see their sweet prom photo, go to our website, themoth.org.

Up next is Otis Gray with a story that takes place one night in a restaurant just outside of Providence, Rhode Island.

Here's Otis live at the mall.

I have a degree in sculpture from Rhode Island School of Design.

So naturally I now have seven years experience waiting tables.

I actually love serving tables.

Like I love giving people an exquisite dining experience and food has always been a really big thing for me.

And you can actually make a ton of money as a server if you have the right job.

But there's a catch.

All of your money comes completely from tips, which means you have to be intelligent, you need to be efficient, you have to seem happy,

and

when shit hits the fan, because it always does, you have to apologize.

You have to say, I'm sorry, is there anything I can do for you?

And the stuff that you have to deal with as a server is absolutely ridiculous.

One time during a busy service, I had a woman pay for a $35 meal completely in change.

I had one dude who ate a four-course meal alone and refused to pay because the restaurant was just a little too hot.

I had a table try to set me up on an actual arranged marriage with their daughter who was there.

And you deal with this shit all the time, but all you can do is smile and nod because you need the job.

You need to get paid.

But I went to art school, so I have this problem with authority, I guess.

So when I was in senior of college, Providence, Rhode Island, I got this really great job at a high-end Italian restaurant, killer food, really, really good staff.

I was walking out with like over $200 in my pocket every night.

They had this rule where if a table didn't finish their bottle of wine, you could cork it and take it home

great rule

it was awesome but there's still you have this job where every night it feels like you're dying a little bit

so one night we're working in the restaurant and I am deep in the weeds and basically that means that shit has hit the fan and there is You cannot make all of your tables happy.

It is a triage situation.

It is absolute chaos.

It's like i'm running around it's halfway through the night and out of the corner of my eye i see this woman come in the door and i know this woman is going to steer this ship into the iceberg

I see this woman and she is so visibly intoxicated.

Like she just reeks 20 feet away.

She's with two really stylish gay gentlemen that are walking in with her and she stumbles over the table, barely makes it there.

She flops down in the seat.

And I'm like, all right, I'm going to deal with this.

So I run up and I say, how are you folks?

My name is Otis.

I'll be your server tonight.

These two dudes are very visibly judging me because even though I was wearing my uniform, I guess they could tell I was a slob on the inside.

And this woman's like, Listen, listen, Oscar.

We want bread and olives and we want you to to come right back I'm like all right I'm Oscar okay so I go get the bread and the olives and I bring it back and I'm running around the restaurant and I'm going by her table and she grabs my arm what you don't do and she's I'm like I'm sorry miss how can I help she's like I want an order like Fantastic.

I'll be right with you.

And I'm running around because like table five needs two packets of splenda and table nine, kids spilled chocolate milk all over his dad's steak.

He's pissed.

This woman starts yelling across the entire restaurant Oscar

and everyone's so furious at me and her and the whole thing so I'm like running over I'm like yes miss how can I help you she's like well this is an Oscar

I want this Pinot Grigio because it's from my favorite region

but I don't want to say any peaches I'm like all right miss this this particular pinot grigio does have notes of peaches in it like it says right in the menu I want this pinot grigio but I better not

any peaches.

And I go and I put the Pinot in, and like it comes to her table, and I'm running by again, and she grabs my arm again, and she shoves the glass of wine into my face, pours the wine on my uniform.

Smell this.

What do you smell?

Peaches.

Peaches.

I said anyone any peaches, Oscar.

Dudes are loving this.

They are dying.

And the whole restaurant is in flames.

And I know that this woman isn't even going to tip me.

I'm not going to even, I don't benefit at all from this.

And I know I should,

I should apologize and say sorry and walk away.

But I snapped and I thought,

I'm going to sell this woman the most expensive bottle of wine on the goddamn menu.

The bodega namia Malbek, which is a $450 bottle of wine, because I know these two dudes aren't drinking.

And if she has another sip, she's going to have to get her stomach pumped.

And I am not usually good at selling wine, but for Peach's lady, the shit was on.

So I said, Miss, if you didn't like that Pinot Grigio, I think I have something that you'll really enjoy.

And it was a masterpiece.

It was like a ballet.

I was like, Miss, this Malbec has notes of mocha and dark plum, and you can feel the smoke.

And the vines were coddled from a young age by a man named Raphael who sung the grapes to sleep every night.

And since you know your region so well, you'll know that the soil in the Rio Negro Valley is exquisite.

And these dudes did not see this coming.

And she is entranced.

I said, Miss,

This Malbeck is simply an experience.

And you seem like the kind of person who knows that life is too short to let these experiences pass you by.

We'll take one bottle of the Maubeck, Oscar.

Bottle comes to her table.

We open it up.

And she has a sip and she passes out on the table.

Her fine gentleman put her arms over their shoulders and they drag her out the front door.

2:30 a.m.

that night.

I leave the restaurant.

I made no money.

I was exhausted.

But I did walk the beautiful streets of Providence, Rhode Island, sipping bodega, Namia, Melbeck, straight from the bottle.

That was Otis Gray.

Otis told me, you can tell a lot about people by how they treat restaurant servers.

I treat waiters differently ever since I've been one.

These days, if I have the luxury of being at a restaurant, I definitely tip extra.

Otis hosts a podcast called Sleepy, where he reads old books in a soothing voice to help you fall asleep because all late nights have to end at some point.

After our break, two more late night stories, one risky, one risque, both take place in New York, the city that never sleeps, when the Moth Radio Hour continues.

The Moth Radio Hour is produced by Atlantic Public Media in Woods Hole, Massachusetts.

Have you ever tried listing out all your financial accounts, like your 401ks, old savings accounts, investments, even that dusty brokerage from a past job, and realize you don't actually know what you have?

or what it's worth?

Most people can't.

And that lack of awareness, it's how money gets left on the table.

That's where Monarch comes in.

It's an all-in-one personal finance tool that helps you feel organized and confident, bringing your entire financial life together in one clean, easy-to-understand dashboard on your laptop or phone.

With Monarch, I realized I had way more cash just sitting around than I thought.

And I wasn't saving as aggressively as I wanted.

Monarch gave me a real-time view of everything, how much I'm spending, where I can cut back, and how my investments are doing.

I even linked my partner's accounts, so we're finally on the same page financially.

Don't let financial opportunity slip through the cracks.

Use code Moth at monarchmoney.com in your browser for half off your first year.

That's 50% off your first year at monarchmoney.com with the code MOTH.

You know what kills the vibe of a summer day?

Opening your wireless bill and seeing a bunch of unexpected charges.

I know I'm at that point and am looking to make a change.

Enter Mint Mobile.

Mint gives you the same premium wireless service you're used to on the nation's largest 5G network, but for a fraction of the price.

And right now, they're offering new customers three months of unlimited talk, text, and high-speed data.

No overages, no nonsense.

You can keep your phone, your number, and your contacts.

All you're ditching is that overpriced bill.

Make room in your budget for things you actually enjoy.

This year, skip breaking a sweat and breaking the bank.

Get this new customer offer and your three-month unlimited wireless plan for just 15 bucks a month at mintmobile.com slash moth.

That's mintmobile.com slash moth.

Upfront payment of $45 required, equivalent to $15 a month.

Limited time new customer offer for first three months only.

Speeds may slow above 35 gigabytes on unlimited plan.

Taxes and fees extra.

See Mint Mobile for details.

Today's show is sponsored by Alma.

I know I'm not the only one who turns to the internet when I'm struggling.

It feels like there are so many answers, from how to learn the ukulele to how to improve my mental health.

But what I've come to realize is that while I can use the internet to strum a stunted version of La Vian Rose, when it comes to taking care of my mind, there's no replacement for real human relationships.

But even finding a therapist can feel like an inevitable online black hole.

That's why I'm so happy to share that Alma makes it easy to connect with an experienced therapist, a real person who can listen, understand, and support you through your specific challenges.

You don't have to be stuck with the first available person.

Trust me, it's important to find someone you click with.

They can be nice, they can be smart, they can let you bring your chihuahua, true story, but they also have to be someone who really gets you uniquely.

When you browse Alma's online directory, you can filter by the qualities that matter to you.

Then book free 15-minute consultations with the therapists you're interested in seeing.

This way, you can find someone you connect with on a personal level and see real improvements in your mental health with their support.

Better with people, better with Alma.

Visit alma.com slash moth to get started and schedule a free consultation today.

That's hello A L M A dot com slash M O T H

This is the Moth Radio Hour.

I'm Sarah Austin Janess.

The stories in this hour are all about nocturnal adventures.

Sometimes when the sun sets, the fun begins.

In 2006, during the Moth's very first U.S.

main stage tour, my friend and moth colleague Gita and I took a night off while we were in Seattle to have dinner on Bainbridge Island, just off the coast.

We took an early evening ferry out to the island.

We set our phone alarms before the very last ferry of the night was to leave.

Well, Gita and I had a lot to catch up on, and we were laughing and telling stories, and you know what happens next.

We didn't hear the alarm, but we did hear the sound of the ferry horn.

And we dumped cash on the counter and we went running through the dark Bainbridge Island woods and we got to the ferry terminal in time to see the boat leaving.

There was one man in the terminal and I said, sir, we missed the boat.

And he said, well, all the locals are singing karaoke across the street.

So that's what we did.

We went across the street, we sang, I got you, babe, with the rest of the tiny island neighborhood, and killed four hours until the ferry started running again.

We were exhausted at the moth the next day, but boy, that was a fun mistake to make.

And yes, there's photographic evidence of all of this at themoth.org.

Molly Kendall told our next story at a moth slam in New York, where public radio station WNYC is a media partner.

Here's Molly live at the moth.

About 12 years ago, I moved to New York City, and to this day, I do not know why why I did that.

But it was an adventure, and to support my adventure, I had to work two, three, however many jobs, running here to there, trying to find

my feet on this pulsing, frenetic city.

Within the beginning of the time that I was here, I met this man named John.

And being a product of someone who was born and raised here, he had

a very calm spirit within this craziness that I felt.

So he and I started to see each other.

One

winter night, he invited me over.

Of course I'm gonna go.

And so I opened my closet of really tired old looking clothes.

And I think with this like blast of courage and insanity,

screw it I'm not gonna wear any of these I'm just gonna wear my snow boots it's the middle of winter my snow boots and I grabbed my old navy all-weather camel colored trench coat

and I threw that on

and I went

yes

every man's dream

and I jumped on the M14D bus and

it was empty and I realized looking at this empty bus full of empty seats I cannot sit down

the code isn't long enough and

I'm just gonna hold this pole and hope that like this trip goes really quickly

so I get to his house and he buzzes me up and I go up and I'm thinking like on the bus I had lost like all of my courage and I thought, like, what am I doing?

What am I doing?

I am not this kind of person.

Whatever that means.

I'm not.

This is not who I am.

And I get to his apartment and I open his door and he's fully clothed, winter jacket on, and he's lacing up his boots.

And he's like, you know what?

I'm so hungry.

Let's go out to dinner.

I said, no, I'm not hungry.

And

he said, okay, just like, just pizza.

And I was like, like, I hate pizza, no.

And he said, sushi.

And I was like, nope, I don't.

And I just couldn't tell him.

Like, I just couldn't tell him what I had done because I was not, I didn't know what I had done.

And

he's like, all right, you know what, Bruno, this, this bartender at the steakhouse where we often went to, he's like, Bruno's at the bar at Strip House.

We're just going to go there.

Don't worry about it.

We're going to have lamb chops.

He knew like the secret to my heart was lamb chops.

And he said, let's go there.

And I thought, oh my god, every time I say no it gets like worse like pizza to sushi to steak like now it's gonna be forever and I'm naked and

okay let's go let's just let's just go and so we go to strip house and like it's middle of winter so the beautiful lovely sweet coat check lady is like oh can I take your coat and I was like no

and

Okay, so we go, Bruno sees us at the bar and he's like, oh, John, Molly, hey, come on, sit down here, I have have your places for you.

Molly, take off that stupid coat.

It looks like you're ready to run away.

And I was like, oh, my God, if you only knew.

And I thought,

before I sit down, like, this is my chance.

This is my chance.

I'm just going to tell him and we're going to go.

Like, I have to get this over with.

But I couldn't because I was just too embarrassed.

Like, what have I done?

And so we sat down.

And Bruno said, what would you like to drink?

And I was like, what would get me drunk the fastest?

So I have the courage to tell him.

And I said, a martini.

Boom, he makes a martini.

It's down.

gone and then he's like wow okay would you like something else yeah just another martini another martini like I need to think I need to think and

he makes the martini and then like the haze of somewhere else I hear John ordering like three or four courses of something or something and there's like a seafood tower involved and like lamb chops and and truffled cream cream spinach and like amazingness but I was just trying to think like how do I get out of this how do I tell him and I just I can't get my courage back the courage that told me, like, just go naked.

Like, that courage is gone.

And so Bruno's like, no, seriously, like, take off your jacket.

And I was like, you know what?

I caught a chill outside.

Like, it's cool.

Like, I'm fine.

And then, like, to help me, Bruno decided to, like, turn up the heat in the bar.

Oh, my God.

No, seriously?

Okay.

So he turned up the heat at the bar.

I'm sitting at the bar.

There's like sweat dripping down my face, down into my like old navy, camel-colored, all-weather trench coat and I just didn't know what to do and the lamb chops come out and I want the lamb chops and I still don't have the courage to say it and finally John's like do you want to start with steak or lamb and I was like you're talking about steak and I'm naked I'm naked the polyester is now sticking to my body and we just we just have to get out of here because I'm naked

and

he looked at me and he's like, we gotta wrap it up.

And okay, I know I'm over time, but I have to tell you guys that that was like 11, 12 years ago, whatever, present day.

We now have a three and a half year old daughter.

And I look at her and she's like this demon.

Like from the moment that she was born, she's this like tornado and a tiny little thing.

And I look at her and I think like,

how do I help mold you into the person you're supposed to be?

And I realized that when I was saying, like, I am not this person that we don't have control over who we are are and what we're supposed to be.

And least of all, we don't have control over our kids, but we can be more than we ever imagined.

Thank you.

That was Molly Kendall.

Molly lives in New York City with her daughter and their dog, Auggie.

Before the pandemic, she was taking flying lessons, but during the pandemic, she's learned to wire crochet and the art of defrosting a freezer.

She said this was her first and last of her intentional naked surprises.

And for anyone listening who's considering a stunt like this, Molly says, Spring for a cab.

This infamous night took place at a restaurant appropriately named Strip House in Greenwich Village.

And to see a photo of Molly with her daughter at the same restaurant at the same bar many years later, go to themoth.org.

Devin Elise Wilson told this next story outside at the beautiful Greenwood Cemetery in Brooklyn.

It was our first in-person, socially distanced show after the pandemic hit.

And even though the audience was made up of only 20 folks, the living audience that is, we were all so thrilled to have a night out together.

And you can't do a late night show without mentioning sex.

So just so you know, sex will be mentioned in this story.

Here's Devin live at the moth.

New York City, New Year's Eve.

2020 is going to be a great year.

With my hype song Out Tonight from Rent on Blast Repeat,

I get all jazzed up.

I do my makeup, my nails, I lotion my entire body and not just the parts visible to the world.

I put on a new dress that hugs me in all the right places and I throw on a big fluffy coat that makes me feel like a movie star.

I grab a couple of condoms and put them in my bag because you never know.

And a lady should always be prepared, especially when she feels this good.

Just as I'm leaving the apartment, I get a text message.

It's from my dad.

It says, Hey, kiddo, there's a saying that some people use.

I don't really like it.

Here it goes.

The best way to get over a man is to get under a new one.

That's BS.

I know you know that.

Enjoy your special evening.

Now let's backtrack for a minute here.

My boyfriend of four months and I had just broken up the day before.

We had made plans months ago to spend New Year's Eve together in the city at his place, but by the time the holiday came around, we both knew what was coming.

There was no spark.

And quite honestly, my gut had been trying to tell me for the entirety of the relationship that this just wasn't it.

He didn't actually see me.

So, I was glad for the clean break while simultaneously sad to be alone in the city on New Year's.

When I realized I could ring it in from my happy place, Marie's Crisis, I knew I was ready for a fresh start.

But how could my dad sense my energy from across the country, though?

I laughed to myself as me and my happy New Year headband and my condoms left the house.

Marie's Crisis is a musical theater, sing-long, show-tuned, piano bar in the West Village, and there is no place like it.

It's easy to make friends when you're all singing, defying gravity, circle of life, and seasons of love at the top of your lungs.

There was one woman in particular who I'd seen there before.

She had the voice of a Broadway star.

After singing a few songs with each other, she pulled me into her group and we all sang and drank together.

A couple hours in, they started talking about kisses at midnight.

She turned to me and said she was kissing a couple other people, but she'd like to kiss me too.

I'd never kissed a woman before.

I'd always been open to it, but the opportunity had never presented itself so organically.

So midnight comes around.

Five, four, three, two, one, happy new year!

No kiss for Devin.

12.05,

still no kiss.

She's busy celebrating with her friends, and I'm not the type to tap her on the shoulder like, hi, remember me?

So after some high fives and happy new Year wishes with the random musical theater lovers around me, I slightly disappointed, just keep singing.

About 12.15, she turns to me and we lock eyes.

And I don't think either of us were expecting that kind of kiss.

Fireworks.

She pulled back and said, ooh, this might be my favorite kiss of the night.

Don't tell the others.

I didn't, but they might have guessed because what we did do was continue to make out shamelessly.

At a certain point, she leans in and whispers, do you want to come home with me?

I say yes, followed by, I've never been with a woman before.

She says, it's okay.

I have.

And we keep singing and kissing.

She would pop in and out for a smoke break here and there, and when she'd come back in, she'd check, you're still coming home with me, yeah I was getting increasingly more nervous but not because this would be my first time so on her next break I thought okay let's tell her that we're herpes positive now so that she can make a decision sooner rather than later so with resolve I throw my coat over my shoulders and I walk outside

I was expecting to catch her smoking alone but she was in a group of at least five people and all I heard was, you guys, she said it like 10 times.

She's definitely definitely coming home with me.

I froze like a deer in headlights.

I definitely wasn't supposed to be hearing this.

I pivoted on the balls of my feet to avoid the click clack of my heeled boots on the pavement as I tiptoed back into the bar.

They were talking about me.

I guess they thought I wasn't going to go through with it.

Little did they know, me not going through with it was furthest from my mind.

Last call, final song, We Hop in a Cab, and I am multitasking, enthralled by the feeling of her lips on mine while simultaneously trying to build up the courage.

You can do it.

Just say it.

We're on the west side highway now, about 150 blocks from her place, 100 from mine.

Okay, just say it before we pass your place, so if she changes her mind, we can make two stops.

I allow myself to sink into the unbridled pleasure of us for a few more blocks.

Just as I'm coming to the peak of my internal pep talk, she turns to me and says, I should have said something sooner, but

my heart is racing.

Are you allergic to cats?

I respond no with a giggle, and she laughs too.

She has unknowingly given me the perfect in.

I take a breath and say, speaking of things we should have mentioned sooner, and I tell her.

I tell her that I'm herpes positive, and this is how it manifests in my body, this is how I manage it, and this this is what it means for us tonight.

As I wait for her response, I'm proud of me for allowing myself to live fully despite fear.

She thanks me for my honesty and says,

this

is worth the risk.

And then we talk about her sexual health history too.

Finally, able to fully relax into us, into our chemistry, our heat, I feel seen in a way that that I haven't in a long while.

Walking to the train the next morning, with Outtonight still blasting on repeat in my headphones, I can't help but grin as I reminisce about the night before.

What a way to ring in the new year.

I will save you the play-by-play, but let's just say I definitely didn't spend that night under a man.

That was Devin Elise Wilson.

Devin is a storyteller, model, and recovering perfectionist.

And no, nothing happened between her and the woman in the story after that night.

She loves that it was just a moment in time.

Devin runs a support group for people who are struggling with the stigma around being herpes positive.

She's written a television comedy pilot to help change the narrative around herpes in the media.

She wanted to call the TV show, Fuck, I have herpes, but Autocorrect changed it to, Duck, I have heroes.

So she went with that for the title.

To see photos of Devin on that fateful night out, go to themoth.org.

After our break, a late night slip and fall leads to a miracle when the Moth Radio Hour continues.

The Moth Radio Hour is produced by Atlantic Public Media in Woods Hole, Massachusetts.

Summer is winding down, so I'm on the hunt for transitional pieces that can help take my wardrobe into the fall.

I want quality, comfort, and style, you know, effortless chic that only looks expensive.

And Quince really gets it right.

What's amazing is that these luxe styles start at just $40.

Quince works directly with top artisans and cuts out the middlemen, so you get beautiful, high-quality clothes at about half the cost of similar brands.

Plus, they only partner with factories that prioritize safe, ethical, and responsible manufacturing practices.

I recently ordered some gorgeous linen shirts, and I've been super impressed with the quality, fit, and feel.

Whether it's for everyday wear or something special, Quince delivers both style and value.

Elevate your fall wardrobe essentials with Quince.

Go to quince.com/slash moth for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns.

That's q-u-in-ce-e dot com/slash/moth to get free shipping and 365-day returns.

Quince.com/slash/moth.

Looking for endless fun with online casino games?

Step into Global Poker, the online social poker site where you can play poker in slots with friends, join regular tournaments, and try out fun new games.

No purchase necessary, just pure entertainment.

Anytime, anywhere.

Sign up now for your free welcome offer and discover the vault.

Play for your chance to redeem some serious prizes.

No purchase necessary.

VGW Group, void where prohibited by law.

21 plus.

TNC's apply.

Hey, it's Jill Schlesinger, CBS News business analyst, certified financial planner, and host of the podcast Money Watch with Jill Schlesinger.

It's a show where we answer your questions about your money, from investing to retirement and completing your taxes.

I'll be your financial coach and help take the stress out of managing your money.

Plus, we might even have a little fun along the way.

Follow and listen to Money Watch with Jill Schlesinger on the free Odyssey app or wherever you get your podcasts.

You're listening to the Moth Radio Hour.

I'm Sarah Austin-Janess.

This is an hour all about night owls and what happens after dark.

Our final story is also from that night in Greenwood Cemetery in Brooklyn.

It's from Flash Rosenberg.

And on this night in the fall of the pandemic, there was a stage set up between the mausoleums and the moon cut through the darkness.

Here's Flash Rosenberg live at the Moth.

I don't think of drawing and photography, writing, or performing as separate disciplines.

I do them all.

I'm an attention span for hire.

And I notice things in order to try to figure out what's going on.

So I was pretty excited when I had a chance to invent a class that I could teach at Cooper Union that took place entirely in the subways.

The class was called Underground Creativity, Einstein on the D-Train.

And instead of assignments which sounded too burdensome, we called what we did noticing games.

And like imagine you're sitting on the subway seat and you're looking down.

And the first game would be like, look at the shoes, guess the face.

Look at the face, guess the shoes.

Then we ramp it up a bit for a noticing game called Nuclear Subway.

Let's say there's a nuclear accident and the only people left on Earth are in this car with you and you have to pick someone to mate with to continue the human race.

Now, this isn't about biology or gender, just who in this car would you want to get together with to create a new world?

Hmm, he's cute, but she's reading.

Well, and if your choice leaves the subway, then you have to pick someone else.

Well, sometimes after class, I would stop at Keynes, which is a Midtown steakhouse around the corner of my loft, so I could write down what I noticed the students noticing during the class.

Now, what am I doing at a steakhouse?

Well, I'm their pet vegetarian.

I would order the side dishes.

I would get the spinach, the mashed potatoes, the salad.

And once when I was there on a date, the guy observed, this is never going to work out.

You cannot even commit to an entree.

You're never going to commit to a relationship.

I was sort of right.

I mean, I'm not married.

I don't have kids.

And I didn't think I had a sense of humor until once I read in the New York Times Science section that normal adults laugh about 15 times a day.

I figured, whoa, I am way over the limit.

So every time I laughed, I made a jotting down of what I laughed about in a notebook for two weeks.

And huh, turns out I was the one making myself laugh.

So I started doing comedy.

And one night I was at a club and my great aunt Leah, who was 89 at the time, she'd never seen me perform before, she comes up to me and says, don't let anyone in the family ever make you feel bad because you didn't have kids.

Because many people believe that children are the essence of life.

She said, I wanted kids too, but it didn't happen.

You're like me.

And the way I see it, those of us who don't have kids have been given some ability to figure out we are here.

So

that gift is a challenge.

I was thinking, I've always wondered why I'm here.

I mean, since I was age two, when I was yelling out the fourth-floor window from our apartment, why am I here?

My mom came in, like, what?

Well, I saw those people downstairs, down on the sidewalk, walking around.

Why was I in my crib?

So one night after class, class, I didn't go to Keynes, but I ended up going to the Cornelia Street Cafe because I was going to deliver a humorous toast at a little private cabaret show to celebrate a friend's birthday.

And I was dressed up.

I like to dress up because I'm a pathological optimist.

I mean, I'm ready in case something good is going to happen.

And I had my distinctive coat that I love so much that it looks like yarn that's sort of pressed into it as if somebody scribbled with red, black, and gray.

And

I also think it's nice to dress up because I feel some responsibility in a quiet way to help cheer up New York.

Well the show ended late and I was really tired and I was hungry and so on my way to the West 4th Street subway to catch the Uptown F, I stop and I get about a dozen bagels and stick them in my backpack so I can toast one when I get home.

And on the way to the subway, I'm thinking, what am I doing?

I mean, where's my big project?

It just seems like I'm stomping on the ants and not feeding the elephants.

I mean, is noticing a career?

What's the point?

So I get out on the subway steps, go through the

turnstile, and I wait for the next train.

Next thing I see is bright blaring lights right above my face with people in masks wearing blue scrubs, looking at me like they're gargoyles, and there's tubes in my arms.

Where am I?

The nurse says, you're in the emergency room at Bellevue.

She said, you fell on the tracks.

You fell on the subway tracks.

Well, I always thought, what kind of a clueless person falls on the subway tracks?

Apparently, me.

Well, the doctor assures that I'm fine.

I'm going to be okay.

Nothing's broken.

There's no trauma.

My heart is fine.

He said, you probably just fainted from exhaustion.

You're good to go.

But I ask, what happened?

The nurse says, it's the duty of a hospital to save your life, not your stories.

And she hands me a plastic bag that says personal belongings.

And in it is my beautiful dress that's all cut up.

Because if you arrive at a hospital unconscious, they cut your clothes off so they don't disturb you in case you have some broken bones.

But by some wild luck, they did not cut my great coat.

Well, they hand me this triple X size sweats, wheelchair me to the curb, then leave me to fend for myself.

I hail a cab and as soon as I get home, it's like 11.30 in the morning, I call my brother because I didn't want him to worry since I missed our 7.30 a.m.

daily call.

Hi, Ken.

Sorry I missed our call.

I was in the emergency room.

I fell in the subway tracks, but I'm okay.

And my brother says, that is not a logical sentence in the English language.

If you think you are okay, you are not okay.

And he jumped up from his

desk in his office in Wilmington, Delaware, took the next Amtrak train up to New York to take care of me.

And his care was a big comfort.

But the whole day, I had this sort of shiver-chill fever feeling because I didn't know what happened.

It was a mystery.

I mean, I have no images.

There was nothing that I noticed.

Was I pushed?

Where did it happen?

Who saved me?

Scarier than the fall itself itself was not knowing the story.

Well, I figured I'd look online.

Surely somebody would have taken a cell phone snap.

A woman on the tracks would be more interesting than what you had for dinner.

But nothing.

Two days later, I get a call from James, the manager at Keynes.

How are you?

That's strange, I thought.

He's never called to find out how I am.

James continues.

My waiter, Robert, rescued you the other night.

Would you like to know the story?

Uh, yeah!

And so my brother and I go over, sit with Robert, and Robert explains.

He says, I'd just gotten off of work at 1 a.m.

and I go racing down the steps to catch the uptown F and oh damn, the train is pulling out, I miss it.

And so I'm looking down the tracks to see, you know, when the next train might be coming, and I notice in the distance a figure that's sort of unsteady, who seems to be trying to navigate around that really narrow part of the subway platform around the stairs.

And suddenly that figure slips and slithers onto the tracks.

And then I notice it's your coat.

It's you, that's Flash.

And so he rallies the few stragglers on the platform to come help.

He said, the biggest guy jumped down.

Somebody was guiding.

He was pulling my arms.

A woman was on the platform on her cell phone calling 911.

The next train is halted.

My life is saved.

Well, being noticed on the subway tracks is all the celebrity anyone ever needs.

Plus, it's like a fashion tip, be noticeable.

If I had been wearing my black puff coat, I would have been disguised as camouflaged as Dupree.

I might still be down there.

And always carry bagels in your backpack.

Gluten saved my life.

They were like little life preservers and probably are the reason why my back isn't broken.

Then Robert continues to tell the story.

He said, when you were up on the platform, you were all apologetic.

You were saying, I'm fine, I'm going to walk home.

You know,

I'm sorry to cause you so much trouble.

Well, those of you who know me will not be surprised to hear that though unconscious, I was still talking.

And then he thought, well, he better be sure that I'm okay before he lets me go.

So he asked my name, got it.

And then he asked for my emergency phone number.

And somewhere in the befuddlement, emergency phone number, I thought of the phone number that I was forced to memorize when I was a child during the Cuban Missile Crisis.

Endicott 8-9978.

Well, the rescuers were much too young to know that used to be what phone numbers were, so he thought, well, something must be wrong with her, so they called an ambulance.

I'm never going to be able to thank Robert enough for saving my life.

My brother tried.

I mean, he took out his wallet and stuck it on the table at Keynes and said, just take whatever you want out of it.

Max out the credit cards.

There's nothing that matters more to me, nothing more valuable than my sister's life.

And the next morning, I was looking out of my fourth story window and I was thinking, how does this affect me?

How has this changed my life?

Well, I do know that why I am here is a question I respect more now.

And when I was a teenager, I asked my Rabbi Krinsky, why am I here, meaning why am I going to Hebrew school?

for eight years.

And the rabbi said, it's not about learning Hebrew.

You know,

all the Hebrew you needed to know, you learned the first day.

I thought, what, shalom, and I was done?

He said, no, no, no, not shalom, but hine, the Hebrew word for here I am.

He said, when you are called upon, when you're, you know, during roll call and you answer to your name, you have agreed to be present.

You have the ability to notice what there is to do.

And then he went on to say, it's not about prayers either.

The way to give thanks for being who you are is that you have

to be exactly who you are.

And then I thought about what Aunt Leah said when, you know, after she saw me do that comedy performance, and she said that I fulfilled what my grandfather could only wish for.

She said, you know, her older brother, my Papa Rosie, he rescued the family.

He brought them from Europe to America before the Nazis.

But she said he didn't want to be a hero.

What he wanted to do was perform on stage in New York City.

So, he nay knee, here I am.

That was Flash Rosenberg.

Flash draws, animates, cartoons, photographs, writes, and performs.

She says she lives in Harlem with two turtles and infinite questions.

To see photos of Flash in her unique coat and with that special waiter from Keynes who saw it and saved her life, plus a collection of games invented by Flash to play on the subway, go to themoth.org.

We wish you many, many nights to remember, and that's it for this episode of The Moth Radio Hour.

We hope you'll join us next time.

This episode of the Moth Radio Hour was produced by me, Jay Allison, Catherine Burns, and Sarah Austin Janes, who also hosted the show and directed the stories in the hour along with Jennifer Hickson.

Co-producer is Vicki Merrick, associate producer Emily Couch.

Additional education coaching by Catherine McCarthy.

The rest of the Moth's leadership team includes Sarah Haberman, Meg Bowles, Kate Tellers, Jennifer Birmingham, Marina Kluche, Suzanne Rust, Brandon Grant, Inga Gladowski, Sarah Jane Johnson, and Aldig Haza.

Moth Stories Are True is remembered and affirmed by the storytellers.

Our theme music is By the Drift.

Other music in this hour from Boombox, Tommy Guero, Boubacar Treoré, Anat Cohen, Jonathan Larson, and Klezmer Juice.

We receive funding from the National Endowment for the Arts.

The Moth Radio Hour is produced by Atlantic Public Media in Woods Hole, Massachusetts.

Special thanks to our friends at Odyssey, including executive producer Leah Rhys-Dennis.

For more about our podcast, for information on pitching us, your own story, and everything else, go to our website, themoth.org.