117. Loren Ridinger: Turning Pain into Purpose – How Grief Became My Greatest Strength

Speaker 1 So often in my life I've met people who said, well I became a doctor because that's what my dad expected.

Speaker 1 And you often meet people and I'm sure you have too that become somebody that they never meant to be.

Speaker 1 And if I hadn't come home and told my dad I was leaving and I was going to do this thing called the internet, I would have been somebody I wasn't supposed to be.

Speaker 2 You didn't go into a pathway that was already laid for you. You didn't have a mentor guiding you through every step of the way.

Speaker 1 We didn't have any money.

Speaker 2 You went from $25 a week to a billion dollar company.

Speaker 1 I would watch Dare get up on stage, you know, a little platform in front, and he would tell people, one day people are going to buy their products online.

Speaker 1 The people in the room, they'd look at him like he was crazy. So he goes, it doesn't matter what they think, Lauren.
What matters is what you think. What do you think? Do you think we can do it?

Speaker 1 Do you believe what I tell you when I tell you we can change the world, you and I? Because that's all that matters to me.

Speaker 2 I always get on your stage and I tell the people it's because I know that we can't change the world on our own, but I'm smart enough to know that with a like-minded group of people, we can make a massive impact.

Speaker 1 It's the only thing I know that can change the world is people.

Speaker 2 Lots of people talk about the mindset that you have to have to keep going and the tenacity. What does it take when you're at the top? Because you've gotten there and stayed there.

Speaker 1 I'll tell you all about it. The number one thing, and JR and I lived our life with this, is.

Speaker 2 Welcome to the Ultimate Human Podcast, where we explore the stories and strategies behind extraordinary individuals who push the boundaries of human potential.

Speaker 2 And today, we're joined by my personal and close friend, the incredible Lauren Redinger, a trailblazer in the world of e-commerce, beauty, and entrepreneurship.

Speaker 2 As the co-founder of MarketAmerica and Shop.com, Lauren has built a global empire that continues to shape how we shop and how we live.

Speaker 2 But beyond her business accomplishments, Lauren's personal journey of overcoming adversity from health challenges, personal loss is just inspiring millions, including myself.

Speaker 2 Today, we're diving into her new book, Scrambled or Sunnyside Up: her powerful outlook on life and what it takes to truly live your greatest life. Hey guys, welcome back to the Ultimate Human Podcast.

Speaker 2 I'm your host, human biologist Gary Brecca, where we go down the road of everything, anti-aging, biohacking, and everything in between.

Speaker 2 And today, we have our first live studio audience.

Speaker 2 We're going to try it like a game show. And I am so excited to have this guest on.
She is a close personal friend of mine. I'm very close with her family.
I knew her husband very, very well.

Speaker 2 He was an inspirational mentor to me, an iconic force in the health and wellness industry, and built an absolutely incredible company that's changing a lot of lives. So welcome to the podcast, Lauren.

Speaker 1 Happy to be here with you. You know how much I love you and how much Jare loved you.
And you are the ultimate human.

Speaker 1 The real truth of the matter is, is like, I know that people love you and they see you, but I know you on such a deeper level. And your whole life is about helping other people live their best lives.

Speaker 2 Oh my gosh. Thank you so much.

Speaker 1 That is such a beautiful. Come on, audience.
That's such a beautiful, that is so beautiful.

Speaker 1 I know, no, we have a real life. Is this your first real live audience?

Speaker 2 This is my first live audience.

Speaker 1 They love you so much.

Speaker 2 That means my mom, I mean, my daughter and my wife.

Speaker 1 I love, by the way, whom I love.

Speaker 1 And they love us, right? I love them.

Speaker 1 But I just, I can't thank you enough for having me here because I consider this an honor.

Speaker 1 For somebody who's worked with you and you've taken care of, you treated JR and I for many years, you are a game-changing human.

Speaker 1 One of the few people I know who spend their life dedicated to making lives better.

Speaker 2 Wow. That's so kind of you.
I mean, the podcast is actually supposed to be about you.

Speaker 2 So

Speaker 1 I'll talk about you a lot, but I love it. I'm excited.

Speaker 2 I know. I'm so excited that you're here too because, you know, we've become really close personal friends over the years.
In fact, I remember the first time that I met you. I met you and JR

Speaker 2 same time. We came, we actually came over.
Um, I forget who introduced us, but we came over to do

Speaker 1 all that matters is us, yeah,

Speaker 1 it doesn't matter. Yeah, I kept you out of all of them.

Speaker 2 We did the blood work and the gene testing to get you guys on the program, but um, and we're going to talk about your husband on the podcast today because he's such an incredible human being.

Speaker 2 And he he changed so many lives, and he, and he's he's still continuing to change lives with you know what people do in the dash, as he would call it.

Speaker 2 And, and I remember that, um, we met met on your boat, beautiful, beautiful yacht, and I boarded your boat.

Speaker 2 And your husband was, was like, immediately became my science spirit animal because I realized that he had a background in biology and he was sitting there doing,

Speaker 2 you know, sorting through research on his computer, just trying to make your supplements better and more effective. And he was looking at these pathways to get things into and out of the cell.

Speaker 2 So I struck up a conversation with him. And rarely have I ever had

Speaker 2 outside of my ultra-woke biohacking community, as in-depth and inspiring a conversation with anyone as I had with your husband that day.

Speaker 1 And we became instant friends.

Speaker 1 Well, you made him think even bigger, if that's possible, because I remember he was doing research that day and you started talking about the type of vitamin B and how it needed to be.

Speaker 1 It was a game changer.

Speaker 2 And I remember he got your whole team on the phone. He was like, why do we have this type of vitamin B?

Speaker 1 He was like, I want this changed. And

Speaker 1 he's never really shut everything down from like listening to one person. He was like, That's it.

Speaker 1 You know, he just felt so connected to you and saw that your purpose was so much bigger than any one thing.

Speaker 2 Yeah. And I, you know, I like to say that I got to know JR in a really unique way.

Speaker 2 I mean, I think so many people were inspired by his stage talks, and they were they've been obviously inspired by the number of lives that you and your company have touched.

Speaker 2 And we're going to talk all about their company in a few minutes. But I got to know him in a really special way because I knew the

Speaker 2 childlike curiosity that he had, this intellectual curiosity where, you know, here's a guy sitting on the back of a big, beautiful yacht running a multi-billion dollar company, and he's spending his time still so curious about what is the next thing that I could do to make this better?

Speaker 2 How can I get this nutrient into the cell in a better way? How can I actually eliminate waste from the cellular activities? And we had just a very inspiring conversation.

Speaker 2 And I remember leaving the boat that day, and I was just struck by how childlike his level of curiosity was. It was like the first day that he found a new toy.

Speaker 2 I'm like, you've been at this for 30 years.

Speaker 1 I think he wrote like 10 emails to everybody this long with you on.

Speaker 1 I was like,

Speaker 1 he was so inspired and so moved and just felt like I've never met anybody. like Gary before.
Yeah. And that was true.

Speaker 2 And you guys have such an inspiring story. You know, I spent some time looking at some of the other podcasts that you've done.
And And I know, I know lots and lots about your story.

Speaker 2 I know your family very well. I know, you know, the folks that you have in your inner circle at your community.

Speaker 1 They love you.

Speaker 2 Community.

Speaker 2 But I think there's so many things to, there's so many angles to Lauren Redinger, aside from the company that you built is that when you were starting, I'll say we wind the clock like 30 years.

Speaker 2 You got it. Right.

Speaker 2 I found a really fascinating secret about you that you worked at Eastern Airlines.

Speaker 1 It's funny. It's funny.
It's a game-changing story, actually because

Speaker 1 you know

Speaker 1 i was 18 my dad was like you got to go get a job you're going to be a flight attendant for eastern airlines i was like by the way we're dating ourselves with eastern airlines the audience is like what by the way you don't worry about it guys okay so exactly they went out of business when i started no but he was like your mom worked for eastern airline well you get it so he my dad was like this is what you're gonna do with your life and i was like i don't want to do that i'm afraid to fly don't make me do this dad and he was like you've got to be something.

Speaker 1 I was like, I just met this incredible boyfriend of mine. And he says, we're going to change the world and we're going to start something called the World Wide Web.
And it's the internet.

Speaker 1 And, you know, Internet Explorer back then.

Speaker 1 And he was like, that's, you know, a pipe dream. You can't do that.
You're going to go get a job. And so I remember I got.

Speaker 1 to the interview place and there was like 300 people online. And back then you had to have like legs, red lipstick on, you know, the long hair.

Speaker 1 I was fitting the bill well for that position, which it would be an embarrassing thing today as a very meet-to-type of treatment for women.

Speaker 1 And when I got up to the front of the line, I gave him all the wrong answers. They were like, you know, why do you want to be an Eastern Airlines flight attendant? Welcome to the friendly skies.

Speaker 1 I was like, I don't want to fly with Eastern. I don't even like Eastern Airlines.
I don't, I would say anything I could not to get the job. Sure enough, I got the job.

Speaker 1 Crazy enough, I got a letter four weeks later. You've been hired.
You got to go to Atlanta. You got to go through training.

Speaker 1 And here's this guy I just met six months before who I'd fallen in love with already, who was telling me about one day people are going to buy everything they want from their, you know, water bottles to their vitamins to their shoes to their clothes online.

Speaker 1 And people thought we were crazy. And so, including my father.
That was crazy. And it was crazy.
That's, you know, 1989, 1990.

Speaker 1 And he said,

Speaker 1 I went to the training and I told my dad, I don't want to do this. And I told my mom, you got to help me get out of this.
And Jare called me.

Speaker 1 And he, you know, just my boyfriend at the time.

Speaker 1 And he said, if you don't come home and tell your dad that you don't want to be an Eastern Airline flight attendant, you're going to become a version of yourself that you never meant to be.

Speaker 2 Wow.

Speaker 1 That was a big moment in my life. And I didn't understand it then until after I lost Jare, because

Speaker 1 so often in my life, I've met people who said, well, I became a doctor because that's what my dad expected.

Speaker 1 Or I became a teacher because that's what my mom expected.

Speaker 1 Or I just became a homemaker because that's what my husband expected. And you often meet people, and I'm sure you have too, that become somebody that they never meant to be.

Speaker 1 And if I hadn't came home and fired Eastern Airlines and told my dad I was leaving and I was going to do this thing called the internet,

Speaker 1 I would have been somebody I wasn't supposed to be.

Speaker 2 And, you know, I think that's another really inspiring part of your story is that you didn't go into a proven industry. You didn't go into a pathway that was already laid for you.

Speaker 2 You didn't have a mentor guiding you through every step of the way.

Speaker 1 We didn't have any money.

Speaker 2 Yeah, you had no money.

Speaker 1 We didn't have anything.

Speaker 2 Dream, I mean, you went from $25 a week to a billion dollar company, a $5 billion company, which is just astounding when you think of the trajectory.

Speaker 2 But I want to peel back some of the layers of that because I think there's so many people watching this right now,

Speaker 2 my audience, especially, that you have a dream or you have an aspiration or you have an idea.

Speaker 2 The majority of people, even in your inner circle, your father included, are going to tell you that that can't be done.

Speaker 2 And that there's no pathway forward for you for that. And you were not only starting to try, you didn't say, I want to build a big supplement company.

Speaker 2 That would have made sense because there's shelf space in,

Speaker 2 you know, in grocery stores. And you could have said, I want to get my supplement onto a shelf.
You wanted to sell it into this mythical, misty space.

Speaker 1 But didn't really exist at that time even exist I mean it was there but it was mostly data driven at the time you know you could find some data on people not everything we can find out about you or me today right but it was information mostly you know the thought of somebody going to you and saying I want to sell your product and I want to put it online seemed preposterous at the time right and I think that you know Even back when I think about the early meetings of our company of SHOP and Market America in 92, JR and I would would go to these, you know, not the meetings that you, not the meetings you go to with me now that you've seen that we do with thousands of people.

Speaker 1 No, no, no, they love you. Yeah.
But back in the day, it was, you know, seven, eight, nine people. Right.
And we would drive all over the country after I quit Eastern Airlines.

Speaker 1 And, you know, I would watch JR get up on stage and he would, in front of seven, eight people, you know, a little platform in front.

Speaker 1 And he would tell people, one day people are going to buy their products online. They're going to buy their shoes, their socks, everything.

Speaker 1 And at 18 years old at the time, I would watch the people in the room and they didn't respond well. You know, they'd look at him like he was crazy.

Speaker 1 And after the meeting, he would be like, that was a great meeting, wasn't it? You know, his personality. That was fantastic.
Wow. We killed him.
We crushed him. We crushed those shoes.
We crushed it.

Speaker 1 And I was like, I'm not sure. Yeah.
They didn't seem to. Think that when I saw their faces.
He goes, it doesn't matter what they think, Lauren. What matters is what you think.

Speaker 2 What do you think? Wow.

Speaker 1 Do you think we can do it? Do you believe what I tell you? When I tell you we can change the world, you and I, we can get people to buy things online. Do you believe?

Speaker 1 Because that's all that matters to me. Because if nobody else believes, but you and I and we put blinders on, we can make this happen.
He didn't have any money.

Speaker 2 We didn't have any money. He's so old at the time.
He's in this.

Speaker 1 Well, he was 38.

Speaker 1 He was 36. I was 18.
Pretty, it's pretty crazy, you know, and everybody thought we were crazy. You're like, why are you dating this guy? I don't have any money.
He's older.

Speaker 1 You know, he doesn't have anything to offer you. You can have a future in journalism, which is where I thought I was going.

Speaker 1 And I was just mad for him. He was magical.
He, he was, everything he said made perfect sense. It didn't matter if he didn't have money to take me on a date.
That didn't matter.

Speaker 1 I just wanted to be around him. That personality, that charismatic man who meant so much to me and cared about people, like you do, actually.

Speaker 1 And I was learning. I was a child.
I was 18. So when he said that that to me do you believe in it i was like yeah he goes improve it

Speaker 1 you do the meeting tomorrow show me i thought how do i break up with this guy before we get to the next meeting all i kept thinking about was like exactly the whole way we were driving from dallas to san antonio i'll never forget

Speaker 1 and i was like how am i gonna break up with him on the way i was too afraid to speak i'd never spoken that's everybody's biggest fear would you agree

Speaker 1 deepwater sharks yeah and dying. Yeah, and dying.
It's like some people may choose dying over public speaking.

Speaker 1 Say that scared. And

Speaker 1 I was like, don't make me do this. I'm not really good at it.
I've never spoken before. He said, you are the greatest female speaker I've ever heard.

Speaker 1 Wow. I was like, how is that possible? How is this guy saying? I'm not going to do well.
I can tell you right now. He's like, you are incredible.
You just don't know it yet.

Speaker 1 One of the finest female speakers I've ever listened to. I got to San Antonio shaking, shivering, got up there in front of like 10 people.
I said, hi, my name is Lauren Ashley at the time.

Speaker 1 I fainted in front of everybody. You fainted? Flat out, knocked out on the ground,

Speaker 1 woke up, and there's people fanning me. You know, all those 10 people in JR looked at me, said, get up.
They turned the AC off in here. Anyone would have fainted.
You are incredible.

Speaker 1 I said, I didn't say anything. I just said, I'm Lauren Ashley.
And he goes, and you said it great. And tomorrow you'll be even better when we get to Houston.

Speaker 2 Wow.

Speaker 1 He didn't get in the car and say, you know what, stick to driving. You're right.
He didn't get in the car and say, you know what? I still need somebody to help get us there. I'll do the meeting.

Speaker 1 He said, you're going to do it again. And that type of belief changed my life.

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Speaker 2 That's eight sleep.com forward slash gary and use the code gary g-a-r-y for your discount transform your nights and elevate your sleep now let's get back to the ultimate human podcast that is so incredible like i i've never first of all i've never heard that story i'm sure some people have but you know i think they a lot of people haven't actually you have i you have the there's a famous story about walt disney about you know how he imagined walt disney world and and he designed this and he went through this structure of buying up all this land quietly in these different LLCs and assembled it all together to create this Walt Disney world.

Speaker 2 And I might be bastardizing the story, but it's very analogous that, you know, at the grand opening, one of the reporters said to one of his chief henchmen that, you know, I'm really sad that, you know, Walt, you know, wasn't here to see this.

Speaker 2 And he said, Walt's already seen this. Exactly.

Speaker 2 He's the one that's already seen it. Exactly.

Speaker 1 He's the one that's already seen it.

Speaker 2 And so, how at that age, I mean, how invested in

Speaker 2 that

Speaker 2 the belief

Speaker 2 and the visualization? Did you ever start to see yourself as a powerful speaker, as a wealthy speaker?

Speaker 1 I think what happened was, is that

Speaker 1 that little bit of belief, I was so used to, like many people, hearing your dad say, you're not capable, you can't do it. Why don't you just do, you know, be a flight attendant?

Speaker 1 Not that that's not an important job. It just wasn't the job I wanted.

Speaker 1 You know, most often we don't believe in ourselves. And I think what happens is, is that a lot of that comes from home.
And, you know, we raise our kids differently.

Speaker 1 We've raised our kids to believe that anything's possible, but not everybody's had that benefit. I didn't.

Speaker 1 And so for to have this man come out of nowhere and say that I was possible, it was like, is he crazy or am I?

Speaker 1 And I started to believe him

Speaker 1 just enough to try again. Yeah.
And the more I tried, even if I was terrible until I got to be great.

Speaker 2 Do you remember the next speaking? Oh, yeah. And I did a lot better.
Did you?

Speaker 1 I got a lot better. I got past Lauren Ashley.
I didn't fall to the ground.

Speaker 1 I was shaking the whole time, but I did it again.

Speaker 1 And guess what? I did it probably for three or four years before I felt like I was really great.

Speaker 2 Wow.

Speaker 1 But that's the thing. It's like people don't believe in themselves enough to go for it, to try it, because we get so beat down by society and people.

Speaker 1 And we worry about what the bandwagon thinks rather than the one person who's looking in the mirror and says, I can do it.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 1 You know, it's a game changer. That belief level changed my life.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 And I am, you know, I used to think when JR passed away, I used to get so many thousands of letters from people say, oh, JR changed the way I thought. And, you know, or I joined your company.

Speaker 1 And even though I never stayed with it, he made an impact on my future and my life. And I realized at that time, he also made an impact on mine.

Speaker 1 And I never stopped to think about it because as we're living, we take advantage of everything else around us, the ones that we love and the ones that love us.

Speaker 1 So we're like, oh, of course, my wife's amazing. Of course, my husband's amazing.

Speaker 1 Instead of saying, thank you for changing my life.

Speaker 2 Yeah. Thank you, Gary.
It's, you know, I remember JR said to me one time,

Speaker 2 I said, how do you, how do you,

Speaker 2 how do you decide what you're going to stay on stage? And I mean, is it scripted? Do you, do you, do you follow a script? And he said, well, you know, we, we, we, we set up,

Speaker 2 you know, the stage in certain ways, but he's like, I think about where I want to take the audience.

Speaker 2 And then when I get up there, I, I take them there. And a lot of what he did was very freestyle.
Like it was, it was very organic and very authentic in the way he spoke.

Speaker 1 And by the way, you know, he's a showman, too. I mean, he was crazy.

Speaker 2 Yeah. No, he was a great showman.
And he was absolutely hysterical. And he would say things that were off the cuff.
Maybe things in the Me Too movement that wouldn't be so gushy today.

Speaker 2 He would have been so

Speaker 2 good somewhere.

Speaker 2 But

Speaker 2 again, I think first he had this intellectual curiosity and then he had this vision. And, you know, in his mind, it had already occurred.
And now that's that's translated into you.

Speaker 2 You built this incredible company.

Speaker 2 Some people would consider what you and I do to be competition. I don't at all

Speaker 2 because you've built such a great scientific team. You formulate amazing products.
As you know, I don't take the stage on other companies' stages ever. And I always get.

Speaker 2 on your stage and I tell the people, listen, it's important for you to know that I'm not being paid to be here. You've never paid me to be at your events.

Speaker 2 I'm there because I know that we can't change the world world on our own, but I'm smart enough to know that with a like-minded group of people, we can make a massive impact.

Speaker 1 Powered by people. The only thing I know that can change the world is people.

Speaker 1 And I think you understand that, like JR understand it, you know, understood it. And I think it's so important.
I think we can't do it on our own. You know,

Speaker 1 we just can't, but we can do whatever we can and make a difference. And I think that is what you and what JR have dedicated their lives to.
And I think we need more of that. It's a problem.

Speaker 2 Agreed. What was the tipping point for you? At what point,

Speaker 2 I mean, you're out in the grind, right? You're doing seven person meetings, 10-person meetings. At some point, they go to 25-person meetings and 50-person meetings.

Speaker 2 When did the first dollar start coming in the door? Because I've heard you talk about $25 weeks. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Well, we had our big date was Wendy's back then. You know, Wendy's was our big date on Wendy.

Speaker 2 Wendy's and Monday's super bar.

Speaker 1 Exactly. Macaroni and the Wendy's Super Bar.
That was our big date. And, you know, he wrote me,

Speaker 1 it's true it was like 4.99 it was all you can eat tacos at wendy's okay

Speaker 1 it's true some people definitely will remember that that's i'm definitely dating myself but and i think you know when i think about

Speaker 1 jarr's background of biology you know being a having a master's in biology was a game changer for us because he wanted he had a problem swallowing pills

Speaker 1 himself. And he said, we need a formulation that people can take that they can get into their bloodstream right away.
And so isotonics was born, of course.

Speaker 1 And it was a game changer for us in its second year of our company.

Speaker 1 It really was. And it's still our number one product today, 32 years later, which is really says a lot for what it is.
But we launched that in year two. And it was a kind of a,

Speaker 1 it, it got better and better. But JR was never about.
the money. In fact, he always acted.
He lived even his last day like he didn't have any.

Speaker 1 The funny thing is we have beautiful homes, beautiful cars, a beautiful boat, but Jared lived like a very normal guy.

Speaker 1 If you told him you had money, he would never believe it because he just didn't live his life that way in his mind. And his mind was he had just the idea to help people.

Speaker 1 The way he wanted to earn money was psychically to help other people.

Speaker 2 Right.

Speaker 1 And that's how you do it. And so I think that's why you and he hit it off so well, because I don't know two humans who have helped more people than the two of you.

Speaker 1 You especially, I'm in this ultimate penthouse and you're changing lives every day. Thank you.
I feel like I'm living a better life being here.

Speaker 1 Like, I went to the ultimate human's penthouse. I walked in, the air felt different here.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 1 How is that possible? Like, how you understand what you're doing, right? Like, I know you're interviewing me, but I just want to tell you, I walked in here.

Speaker 1 The air is different in the ultimate human's penthouse.

Speaker 2 You feel different.

Speaker 1 The water's different. Got my, I'm taking this home.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 But those are, those are props, but you can take it.

Speaker 2 I think you have,

Speaker 1 you know, changed a lot of the game for us, too, over the last 10 years of us being friends. Because,

Speaker 1 you know, I think when you care enough about what we do put in our body, like JR used to say, I don't know everything.

Speaker 1 You don't know everything about products, but we can find the right people who help us get there. Yes.
And I think that's key. And that's what you help do for so many of us.
Thank you.

Speaker 2 I mean, I've loved being, you know, associated with your organization. And I always say that I think we should do things that serve our temple.

Speaker 2 You know, we should build this invisible fence around ourselves and try to filter things before they get to our bodies. And we let a lot of thieves into our bodies, like we're talking about.

Speaker 2 And they steal from us. We let them in.
I mean, the processed foods, the sugary ingredients, the seed oils, things like that.

Speaker 1 And negative people. And negative people.
And all of them affect our health. All of them.
It's not just what we intake. It's also what we surround ourselves with.

Speaker 1 And I think that's one of the things that I think. JR and I live by, as you know, that, you know, we kept a very tight circle.

Speaker 2 Yeah. And, you know,

Speaker 2 on the journey with you and JR, I mean,

Speaker 2 you know, sadly before his passing, I mean, he was in some of the best condition of his life.

Speaker 1 You had him in the best health of his life. If it wasn't for the fact, no, no, you had his blood perfect.

Speaker 1 If it wasn't for the fact, and this is something I've never talked about publicly is, you know,

Speaker 1 JR made the decision on his own. to have that second booster that you advised him against doing.

Speaker 2 I remember we had that conversation.

Speaker 1 And he was like, well, well, Lauren, I'm going to do it because you've had COVID four times and I haven't and I have slept with you and I didn't get it. And he thought that was it.

Speaker 1 What he didn't realize is that you had made his immune system so strong that he didn't need it.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Four weeks after he took that second booster, he died of a pulmonary embolism in his lungs, as you know.

Speaker 1 And that

Speaker 1 one moment of listening to what, you know, everybody was saying, they tested a vaccine booster for a few months. And the next thing I know, he's gone.

Speaker 2 Right.

Speaker 1 And that's something that people aren't talking about. It's changed my life completely.
It's, you know, I'm, as you know, every day on the recovery through grief of trying to get through it.

Speaker 1 And it's hard.

Speaker 2 Yeah. You know, we talked about, um, I remember talking to you after JR passed.

Speaker 1 Oh, the next day I called you.

Speaker 2 Lauren, we've got to, you, you got to focus on, on yourself and keep yourself healthy. I mean, there's, there's, you know, there's no way to stop you from grieving.

Speaker 2 There's nothing that I can give you to. take away your pain, but we've got to go back to serving the temple so that you can continue the mission on his behalf.

Speaker 1 That was the first thing you did. I mean, I remember you calling me saying, I can't take away the pain.
Yeah. I can't.
I'm not going to. And

Speaker 1 unlike what most of the community does is that they, we suppress so many people with drugs to make them feel better, not feel, you know, all of the stuff that's happening out there that you and I both are against.

Speaker 1 Right. That, you know, the rest of the medical community.
just, you know, most of them put a stamp on. Take this pill, you'll feel better.
Right.

Speaker 1 You know, you said, I can't do that for you, but what I can do is make you the healthiest I can do while you're going through this. And that's what you did.
And, you know, 50 pounds later, off.

Speaker 1 Bloody healthy.

Speaker 2 You walked in today. I was like, holy cow.

Speaker 2 Can we give a round of applause for

Speaker 2 you?

Speaker 1 Healthier than ever. I mean, my cholesterol is your team told me as an 18-year-old.

Speaker 1 It's crazy.

Speaker 2 Your sugars are better.

Speaker 1 My sugars are normal. I'm a girl whose mom died at 42, massive heart attack.
My dad died of complications of diabetes, type 1. I should have everything wrong with me.

Speaker 1 I should be the one gone, not JR, because his family lived till 99 and 98. His grandmother lived till 104.
You had his life extended. And one wrong decision took his life from me.

Speaker 1 And, you know, you came in and said, I'm not going to let it happen to you.

Speaker 2 That's right.

Speaker 1 And that's, that was like two weeks into me losing JR. I remember that.
You came to Connecticut. You took care of me.

Speaker 1 And here I am just celebrated, unfortunately, two years, which I don't say celebrated, but JR's two-year anniversary of his death. And I'm the healthiest I've ever been because of you, thank God.

Speaker 1 Still going through the grief, still struggling through that, but mentally getting stronger all the time.

Speaker 2 You know, we talked a lot about, we even talked about it at your convention about how people can take their pain and turn it into their purpose. Oh, you, you.

Speaker 1 You blew everybody's mind that day when you talked about your own pain. And I think it was something nobody had ever heard before, that story, but it inspired me to turn my own pain into the purpose.

Speaker 1 And, you know, I think about,

Speaker 1 you know, my whole life, I never had anybody talk to me and say, this is what grief is going to feel like.

Speaker 1 Nobody ever said to me,

Speaker 1 you'll lose people one day, and the pain will be so great that it'll be hard to keep moving.

Speaker 1 It has been a journey. You know, I've lost my mom.
I lost my dad. I know grief.
I'm familiar with it. I was very close to my parents.

Speaker 1 I've never felt the pain I feel losing a guy I knew longer than my own family.

Speaker 1 It's been a challenge, but I finally decided that I can take this pain, as you say, and turn it into a purpose. You know, I went to so many counselors after JR died.

Speaker 1 And by the end of four weeks, I had fired them. And the reason I fired them is they were good counselors.
I wasn't good. I wasn't good.
If I were honest, I wasn't right in the head.

Speaker 1 But as soon as somebody says, well, you know, you could date again, I was like, you're fired. You know,

Speaker 1 you're fired. And I wasn't ready at the time.
And I'm still not ready. But here's the funny thing.
Serena Williams had sent me a message one morning, like she did every day after Jared passed away.

Speaker 1 And in that message was a little ad.

Speaker 1 And I clicked on the ad and it was a group counseling class here in Miami.

Speaker 1 And she said, I think you should go. It may change your life to hear what other people are going through and other wives who have lost their husbands.

Speaker 1 And when you're you're going through grief, Gary, you know, I don't know how familiar you are with it, but when you go through it, you think you're the worst, your pain's the worst, okay?

Speaker 1 And nobody knows what it's like to feel like you feel. So I was like, well, I didn't just lose my husband.
I lost my best friend. I lost my coach.
I lost my mentor. I lost my partner.

Speaker 1 The guy who coached me, the guy who trained me, everything. I've never lived alone.
So mine's got to feel worse than theirs. But I went.

Speaker 1 And when I got there, I sat in a room with 10 other women and all of them went around the room. Some love their husband more than others.
You can expect that. Others loved them just as much as I did.

Speaker 1 Most of them didn't have them as a husband. I mean, they had a husband, but not a coach, a mentor, whatever.

Speaker 1 But they lost something I didn't. And that was their lifestyle, their life, their way to put their kids through school.

Speaker 2 A home.

Speaker 1 They couldn't afford to keep the home over their head. They couldn't afford to pay their light bills, you know, the tuition.
And it was an eye-opener for me.

Speaker 1 And I realized that, you know, even though we started with nothing, Jared didn't leave us with nothing. Right.

Speaker 1 And that I would turn that pain and spend the rest of my life helping other people achieve that type of financial freedom where they wouldn't have to worry again.

Speaker 2 And I think a lot of times, too, when we think about those moments, you think, if that person were back just for a day and,

Speaker 2 you know,

Speaker 2 What would they tell me? Would they want me to have a memory of them in grief? Would they want me to stop moving forward?

Speaker 2 Would that person say, I want you to lay in bed and just grieve for for me i want you to wake up every day and feel the burden of my loss i want you to stop what you're doing i want you to quit your purpose i want you to just turn inward and suffer or would they say you know i want you to go and carry this message to its fullest extent like i want you to go out there and dominate and i want you to be happy and i want you to be booming about your purpose i mean i feel like you know jwar if jayar is that what jar would have said yeah he would say go go go get after it i love to hear you say that.

Speaker 2 I know he would say that. I've got goosebumps right now.

Speaker 1 I hear you, and I'm listening to you like he's saying it to me. And I feel that.
And it took me a moment to feel that. It did.

Speaker 1 I think when you're going through grief, you don't know how you're supposed to feel or react. And, you know, I think it also depends on who you ask.
You ask your children, your grandchildren.

Speaker 1 They're like, if you ever date again, you're dead. You know, if you ever seen anybody, you're dead.

Speaker 1 But what you realize is that you do things in your own time and you take a lot of grace for yourself. And there's a new Lauren that's emerged from this.

Speaker 2 No question.

Speaker 1 And I'm doing the best I can. And this is our first big week again that we've had volume in the company like we have when JR was still here.
Really?

Speaker 1 Which I'm really happy about because JR used to say to me, don't ever count dollars, Lauren. Just keep working hard.

Speaker 2 Wow.

Speaker 1 And I would do that. And he'd say, your work will never pay off till years later.
I never understood that till now.

Speaker 1 Now two years in, it's the first week that we've had that's been ultra successful. And I'm like, okay, this is what he was talking about, how it took two years of hard work.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 You're not, this is the best of all.

Speaker 2 Well, I'm sure it shook the foundation of the company too much. Not just your first three months.

Speaker 1 Hey, wait, the real foundation.

Speaker 1 Yes. Oh, yeah.
Captain's gone. Our general's gone.
Our sergeant's gone. And how is this girl going to fill his shoes? You know how big those shoes are.

Speaker 1 And the funny thing is I would go back and I'd listen to messages he would leave me like, you know that you can do whatever I do, right?

Speaker 2 Better.

Speaker 1 And then all my friends and, and, and my, my family would come to me and say, you know, every time we'd asked Jared, what should we do about a problem? He'd say, well, what did Lauren say?

Speaker 2 Really?

Speaker 1 And then I started to realize he cared about what I thought.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 1 And that's why, of course, I wrote the book, Scrambled, or Sunny Set Up, because every day, you know, I couldn't figure out what to name the book. At first, I was going to do it like,

Speaker 1 what do you do with the dash? You know, because that was his favorite

Speaker 1 thing.

Speaker 2 What are you going to do with the dash? You know, the day you're born.

Speaker 1 The line.

Speaker 2 The the dash, and then the day you die.

Speaker 1 So, you know, the line between those two dates. And, you know, he lived his life like that.

Speaker 2 Like,

Speaker 1 just live our life in the dash, whatever it takes. If we do a lot to help people, we've made a difference.
And that was his big motto. Like, you cannot succeed without helping other people succeed.

Speaker 1 And he used to say, Lauren, we must succeed so other people can realize their dreams. Because they won't go for it.
They won't believe they're possible.

Speaker 1 And so, you know, every day I've been, I was with JR for 36 years. So every day we would wake up and he'd say, how do you want your eggs? Scrambled or sunny set up.
And I'd say, I don't know.

Speaker 1 What are you in the mood for? Do you want scrambled or sunny set up?

Speaker 2 It's your stomach.

Speaker 1 I mean, what am I supposed to say?

Speaker 1 And I'd say, have scrambled today. Next day, scrambled or sunny set.
Sunny set up, baby. Okay, great.
This went on for years.

Speaker 1 So after you're married for 36 years, one day you wake up and be like, I don't know, Jesus. What are you in the mood for? Do you want scrambled or sunny set up?

Speaker 2 It's your stomach.

Speaker 1 You're driving me crazy. I'm not having eggs.

Speaker 1 And I would get frustrated. And then I would realize

Speaker 1 after he passed away, that the very thing that made me fall in love with him, that advice he wanted from me, how should I have my eggs, is the same thing that frustrated me.

Speaker 1 And you can't let your life get twisted like that. And we do.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Like, I used to love that you cared about my opinion. Now you became a pain in the ass by asking me.
I couldn't just take a second and say, hey, babe, have scrambled.

Speaker 2 And so I named the book Scrambled or Sunny side up because after life you lose the love of your life life gets scrambled but you can turn it sunnyside up again hey ultimate humans i've got something truly special for you our biggest black friday cyber monday offer yet this is your chance to grab a lifetime deal on my vip rule breca community what does it mean to be a rule breca you'll join me for exclusive monthly live q a sessions get vip access to all of my challenges and be the first to unlock exclusive content with the incredible guests that we bring on board.

Speaker 2 Here's the deal: starting December 1st, membership rates are going up to 97 bucks a month. I still think that's a steal, but if you join now, you'll lock in your spot at just $47 a month for life.

Speaker 2 Yes, that's a lifetime access at a rate that will never change, even as prices rise for everyone else. Don't miss this opportunity to invest in your health and be a part of a game-changing community.

Speaker 2 Head over to joinrobreca.com right now. That's joinrubreca.com and secure your spot.
And And I'll see you on the inside. Now, let's get back to the Ultimate Human podcast.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I remember when I was speaking at your last convention, I was told a story right before we got on the podcast, but I was getting ready to take the stage and they came running over to me and they're like, Hey, we got to push you back five minutes.

Speaker 2 I was like, Oh, what's going on? They're like, Lauren's book just hit number one on Amazon. And I'm like, I thought the book wasn't out yet.
They're like, It's not.

Speaker 1 I'm like, It's not.

Speaker 2 I didn't even know you were going to do this one. I didn't actually not have a book out.

Speaker 1 I didn't know that either. The funny thing is, there's like

Speaker 1 I'm like, all I was focused on was because it releases, you know, Valentine's Week of 2025. I mean, 2024, 2025.

Speaker 1 We're in 2024. So that's how it lost.

Speaker 2 It's 2025.

Speaker 1 And I didn't know that there was these other lists besides New York bestsellers, Amazon, Barnes and Noble. And we hit them all that same day.
And I was pre-orders, right?

Speaker 2 Just people. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And so, of course, our company is a great platform for that type of stuff because, you know, everybody wanted to buy the book.

Speaker 1 And we sold so many books outside the community which is so amazing but it's a beautiful story of of lessons that i've learned that i didn't know while i was while jara was here yeah

Speaker 1 and so it opens up with the you know he wrote me 5 000 love letters in 36

Speaker 1 remember you telling me that yeah 5 000 love letters and hand wrote long ones and i was the one that was like Thank you, baby. I love you.
You know, I didn't leave the long love letter.

Speaker 1 I wasn't good at the long love letters. And I told him all the time how much I loved him, but the book opens with a love letter from me that I should have given to him.

Speaker 1 And it ends with a love letter, I wish I'd left him before he left. So is a lot of healing.
There's a different Lauren from chapter one to the end. Really? You can see that

Speaker 1 the transition of that Lauren

Speaker 1 to the Lauren that you say he's saying, go be your best version of you.

Speaker 2 And I think, you know, a lot of people that are dealing with that kind of grief, I think if you just close your eyes and you imagine that person, you know, for a few minutes back in your life to give you advice, I think very few people would say, I want you to grieve heavily for me rather than I want you to just get after it.

Speaker 2 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 And Jared, by the way, Jare would definitely say, grieve heavily for me, but go back to work.

Speaker 1 He would definitely say, right, Sage, he would definitely say grieve after you.

Speaker 2 I don't want you bawling your ass off.

Speaker 1 He would be like, cry your ass off and then go back to work.

Speaker 1 I mean, and it's funny because you go through these crazy phases. Like when Jared first died, the company took a huge tumble at first.
You know, I told you.

Speaker 2 Which has got to be like, like, that's just insult to injury.

Speaker 1 Well, here's the thing. In a weird way, I was like, let it happen.

Speaker 1 I wanted people to remember that we had one leader.

Speaker 1 And it was my leader. It was their leader.
And that's how we became who we were. But then I was like, come on, Lauren, you got to get in there.

Speaker 1 And I decided to do exactly what you did with your own pain with the community of why you went off on your own and you know didn't stay working for the government going in the court you know courtroom and you know dying diagnosing people after they're gone right right that's because that's what you did yeah that's exactly what I did mortality yeah mortality and so for me it was like

Speaker 1 how many more people have to go before we get in and do something Yeah, and I wanted to do something and I did and I went right to work.

Speaker 1 And, you know, every day I'm working really hard at doing the best version of me and not trying to fill somebody else's shoes. Yeah.
But still have so much to look up to.

Speaker 2 So let's, let's, let's back up a little bit

Speaker 2 because I, again, there's so many people, there's so many things to unpack with your journey. I mean, you know, it's, it's obviously been a journey of struggle.
And the pain came at the end.

Speaker 2 But before that, there's this tremendous level of success. And it's not just a tremendous level of success.

Speaker 2 You know, I always marvel not just at great athletes or, or great actors, or inspiring people. It's when somebody can dominate an industry for a long period of time, like a LeBron James.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 You know, he didn't just make a few great layups. I mean, you know, Michael Jordan or, you know, Lance Armstrong, seven back-to-back 45, Serena Williams, you know,

Speaker 2 John Jones, who's a

Speaker 2 friend of mine. He's getting ready to fight in the UFC on November 16th and never lost a heavyweight fight.

Speaker 2 And what's super inspiring to me is how some people can keep that level of success and commitment over such a long period of time. And you've done it for three decades.
Yeah,

Speaker 2 32 years. 32 years.

Speaker 2 And so,

Speaker 2 you know, it's not that all you've known is success because a lot of what you would known is not success.

Speaker 1 Not at all.

Speaker 2 And so, you know, lots of people talk about the mindset that you have to have to keep going and the tenacity. But what do you have?

Speaker 2 What does it take when you're at the top?

Speaker 1 I want you to talk a little bit about the people you surround yourself with how important your inner circle is i'll tell you all about it um yeah because first of all because you've gotten there and stayed there and i think you would agree the number one thing and and jr and i lived our life with this is protecting this

Speaker 1 you know protecting our mindset mentally not letting people in here

Speaker 1 uh because this can either be a prison or it can set you free right and so

Speaker 1 Our mindset was so important. And he just used to have one rule.
If I would, you know, early in the early days, Lauren would, you know, I was young,

Speaker 1 18 years younger than JR. And, you know, I would say, like, everybody thinks that you should do this with me.
He's like, who's everybody? Who cares about everybody?

Speaker 1 You need to eliminate everybody, Lauren. And you need to focus on me and you and not involve third-party people in our life.
So to have a good marriage for 36 years, that's what we had to do.

Speaker 2 Sage and I say no light between us.

Speaker 1 No light. And no, you've got to have an agreement.
No going to bed mad. A lot of love, forgiveness for each other.
Don't hold a grudge. Grudge makes you old and makes you sick, creates disease.

Speaker 1 I don't care what anybody says, right?

Speaker 2 Yep.

Speaker 1 But I think the mindset of being around the right people and who you let in your world and they've got to, you know, they can do a million different things.

Speaker 1 They don't have to be in the same profession as you, saying, doing the same thing that you, but their mission has got to be the same, that they care about the mind and they only want positive people around them and they believe in you and they lift you up rather than tear you down.

Speaker 1 You know, we all grow up in an environment of society that has a tendency to make us believe that we're not possible

Speaker 1 when we are. Yeah.
And so he changed that for us. Our atmosphere changed.

Speaker 2 Yeah. I remember you even said one time that I do the work of 25 people.
And the way you explained it was,

Speaker 2 you know, The next 25 people are not willing to do the difficult things like the hard things that I'm willing to do.

Speaker 1 That you're willing to do. Yeah, and that's true.
and i think most

Speaker 1 people are able most people are capable but they're not willing to

Speaker 1 and that's really you know i say like what are you willing to do because somebody's like oh my god i want to be like you one day and get up there and inspire people and i said you can be the question is are you willing to do what i do to get yeah that didn't that didn't happen every night five years first time passed out took me five years to feel like i could actually go in front of a group of a thousand people forget about 10, 18,000 people.

Speaker 1 You know, a lot of people. Next week, I'm going to, you know, Asia and speaking in front of 26,000 tickets sold when they heard I was coming.
26,000? Yeah, 26,000 in Taipei.

Speaker 1 But, you know, are you willing to do what I do? See, the first thing I do when I get up is I do the hardest things first. That's what most people avoid.

Speaker 2 Right.

Speaker 1 They want to put it off. They're like, well, I'm going to wait till tomorrow because that's a hard call.
I want to wait till tomorrow because you know what?

Speaker 1 That takes a lot of effort and I got to be alone and lock myself up in the room. No, no, no.
My room is, and my rule is, is that don't come in my room till I finish the hard stuff first.

Speaker 2 Wow.

Speaker 1 And let me get it done because I know that you're not going to do it. Somebody's got to do it.
And if you'll do it, then I won't have to, but if you won't, I'm going to do it.

Speaker 1 And, you know, we've built leaders like that around us because that's a hard thing to do, as you know. Not everybody will think like you.
No doubt.

Speaker 1 You know, how do I get people to do the hard things first when, you know, most of the time they're putting that off, you know, and being a good leader is also being able to make a decision.

Speaker 1 And Jerry used to say, I don't care if you make the wrong decision. I just want you to make a good decision.
Meaning, it could be wrong, but I want you to think it through.

Speaker 1 And if you believed it was a good decision and you made a mistake and it was wrong on, it will never be wrong to me. Wow.
We can recover from that.

Speaker 1 What we can't recover from is that you take forever to make a decision. That's called procrastination.

Speaker 1 That's the killer for most people. They put it off.
You know, excuses, procrastination, something I'll never do. So I live by my decisions.
I make good quality decisions and I think them through.

Speaker 1 And I, like you, allow myself time to do that. Yeah.
You know, I think it through. You give your morning yourself.
I do the very same thing.

Speaker 1 It's funny that when you told me what you did and I tell you what I did, they're the same thing. Successful people do very similar things.
They own their morning. Yes.

Speaker 1 And those hard things first have been a game changer for me because nothing comes between me and that time unless it's an emergency, unless it's a, God forbid, an emergency.

Speaker 2 I just hammered the staff about it this morning. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Like, don't bother me before 11. This is what I'm doing.
This is critical thinking time. This is the time that Lauren needs to make everything go.

Speaker 2 Right.

Speaker 1 And there's a reason why I think JR used to do the same thing. I never really said to him, like, why don't you want to take calls before 11? It just became second nature for me.
Right.

Speaker 1 I started to do the same thing.

Speaker 1 And, you know, I do those things. So then I can own the rest of my day.
So if I want to go see my grandkids, go play soccer, I can do that. Right.

Speaker 1 You know, those are the things that are really important too.

Speaker 1 And I think that's so important. Your mindset's everything.
Your attitudes, everything. What you believe is possible will change your life.

Speaker 2 How important was the how important was the struggle to your success now? I mean,

Speaker 2 how critical do you think it is to have had nothing

Speaker 2 before you have everything?

Speaker 1 Jared and I failed so many times.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 1 We failed over and over and over again. We just never quit.

Speaker 1 And I do think that without failing, it's almost impossible to succeed.

Speaker 2 I think so many people don't want to embrace the suck.

Speaker 1 I know, and they've got to. That's like every time I see somebody almost, almost, they're so close that I'm like, tie a knot and hold on.

Speaker 1 Don't throw in the towel yet. You're almost there.

Speaker 1 Whether they're my business, your business, somebody, it doesn't matter if they're a friend and I love them and I want them to make make it and I see them this close. Like, don't quit.
You're there.

Speaker 1 You're almost there. You're almost there.
You know, when the pain starts to happen, you're so close. Yeah.
And that's when people quit. You're right.

Speaker 2 Yeah. They don't want to embrace the suck.
I mean, the hard conversations.

Speaker 2 I like what you're saying because I think what happens to a lot of companies, and this happened to Sage and I when we were building our company, we haven't built anything nearly as successful as yours, but we

Speaker 1 jumped pretty good in the ultimate penthouse right here, baby.

Speaker 1 I got to tell you, the ultimate human has got it going. This ultimate human penthouse, I want to move into, by the way.
I got the next guest room next.

Speaker 2 She walked around and like bought everything.

Speaker 1 I bought everything and I want to move in with Sage. And that's it.
I'm done. Sage and Gary.
I am with you guys.

Speaker 2 I love you. Live audience.
Should we let Lauren do the penthouse for you?

Speaker 1 Yes. I get the other bedroom.

Speaker 1 I love you guys.

Speaker 2 We actually have a guest room for you. I love that.
I can't wait. I have a Vemiacoustic bed that can, you know, put you in a theta state.
So you'll be able to do it.

Speaker 1 First of all, I walked in when Sage and you showed me your bedroom and I walked in. I was in a theta state.

Speaker 1 When I walked into the whole space the air is different here yeah everything is different here

Speaker 1 and you feel like i gained years here

Speaker 1 i'm hydrated yeah thank you you're welcome

Speaker 1 like i've actually gotten some years back and that yeah matters that's how much i know you care about people yes that's why i'm here i love you you know i would i haven't talked about anything with jr at all publicly as you know like this not talking about the grief how it happened the vaccine the booster this is the first time you know because people don't want to hear it no they don't want to hear it or they they think you're a naysayer or you they're like oh let's not talk about the booster again okay well i'm gonna tell you what happened to me yeah right exactly i mean and you know there's people watching this right now that have their lives have been touched like that and maybe they haven't attributed to that yeah of course it's a fact yeah i think you know that the blessing for me um and for us i think has been no matter what side of the aisle you're on from the pandemic emerging from that pandemic people woke up and said i got to take my healthcare choices into my own hands.

Speaker 2 Not my emergency care. I mean, you know, if you got pain radiating down the left side of your arm, you need to go to the emergency room, right? But, but I need to take,

Speaker 2 if I have an optimal health goal, I need to take responsibility for it myself. I can't put that in the hands of the elites or the government or modern medicine.

Speaker 2 I need to actually become my own citizen scientist and figure out how do I live to be the best version of myself. That's it.

Speaker 1 That's it right there. And you said something to me earlier today, which is we've got to build this invisible fence around what gets in here.
Right. And that's so critical.
And I think we overlook it.

Speaker 1 Like we spend more money on health and anti-aging, but we buy products, but forget to take care of us. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And you remind us of that all the time. And you're so right.

Speaker 2 Yeah. We bully things like sleep in our schedule.
You know, we, we,

Speaker 2 we wonder why we're not feeling as good as we could feel or performing as well as we could perform or why aging has been so quote unquote cruel to us.

Speaker 2 But aging hasn't been cruel to you, been cruel to yourself. You're right.
I mean, father's

Speaker 2 time's not stealing from you.

Speaker 1 Father, time's not stealing, but you're robbing yourself. And I think you're right.
And I think as humans, we overlook it. We don't like it.
I love that you have this pattern that you do, right?

Speaker 1 And I have one very similar, as I said. The other thing I do is, is if I know I'm going to be short on sleep, I'll steal a nap.
That's fine. Religiously.
Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 Like those 20 minutes to me are everything. They just

Speaker 1 have a lot of signs.

Speaker 2 Some of the most successful people in the world regularly napped. I mean, some of the greatest presidents of our, you know, of our class.

Speaker 1 I'm one, 20 minutes a day, call the shots. I talk about it.

Speaker 2 It's a nice little reset.

Speaker 1 That's it. It's like, I got to reset this brain because, you know, I owe it to myself to do it.

Speaker 2 Yeah, no question. And we were talking about sleep on the way here, and I was showing you the sequence of sleep scores.
And, and,

Speaker 2 you know, it's sometimes you just need to call people's attention to it. Like, I'll say, um, well, tell me about your sleep routine.
And they go, well, I, I go to bed. All right.

Speaker 2 Well, when do you go go to bed?

Speaker 2 Whenever I'm done.

Speaker 1 Whenever I'm done with my bed.

Speaker 2 I've done my stuff. You know, when I'm done, I put the kids to bed, then I read and then I watch some TV show and I fall asleep with the TV on.
What time do you fall asleep? Whenever I fall asleep.

Speaker 2 So they have no sleep hygiene. They have no sleep routine.

Speaker 1 No pattern, no routine. No pattern.

Speaker 1 And when you explained yours to me today, now I've got a new, like, that's a new thing I'm going to focus on is the pattern at night because I have it in the morning. Yes.

Speaker 1 But at night, I got to get better reminding myself, turn it off.

Speaker 2 Yep. Just shut it off.
I'm pretty good about shutting it off i mean i've left many a guest sitting at my dinner table and he's like sorry

Speaker 1 we'll tell you sorry sage you're the one

Speaker 2 like where did he go oh well

Speaker 2 he left yep i go right in i'm like oh 10 o'clock and now that they know yeah people know where the door is they've helped themselves do the food you guys want to chit chat about meaningless nonsense i'll see you in the morning it's about taking it really is about taking care of yourself because

Speaker 1 it's like when i think about i didn't expect to be to get this healthy over this last year and a half, but it was like, Lauren, I'm going to do this with you while you're going through what you're going through.

Speaker 2 Just do it.

Speaker 1 Here are the things I need you to do.

Speaker 1 And we did it. And look what happened.
Yeah, you look beautiful. And I think that makes

Speaker 1 mentally, that's helped me get really strong again, too. And I think there's a connection, right?

Speaker 2 Yeah. Very much.
So now,

Speaker 2 where's the future for Lauren Reddit? It's funny. You know, what's changed?

Speaker 1 It's a lot has changed. I mean, I've changed.
And I think, you know, the same rule that Belt us, people, you know, Jerry used to say, Lauren, don't worry about all the AI and the technology.

Speaker 1 We'll do that anyway. We have to do that anyway.
But let's not lose sight of why we're here. It's because of people.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 we're going to always be connected to people. You know, it's funny.
Somebody

Speaker 1 played a little message.

Speaker 1 I won't say who because he's probably not supposed to, I'm probably not supposed to say it, but somebody played a beautiful message in a meeting that they have with Warren Buffett recently to me.

Speaker 1 And the message was very much like what JR would say to me. It said,

Speaker 1 don't worry about all the technology that's out there. It was very recent.

Speaker 1 Don't worry about all the technology. Worry about people.

Speaker 1 As long as you, whoever takes care of their customer the best, whoever takes care of their people the best wins ultimately. Wow.
And so for me, that's my number one goal.

Speaker 1 You know, how to make returns easier, how to make purchasing faster, how to do things for people, get what people want, you know, have the ultimate human new store somehow or another.

Speaker 1 I got to get a lot of people.

Speaker 2 Watching all the human mind together.

Speaker 1 Yes. You know, I want to do things that people want.
I want to hear what they want and I want to activate. Yes.
And for me, that's the future for us. And I want to do it better than anybody.

Speaker 1 Cause, you know, you can. You can, there's, you know, Amazon's the biggest seller in the world, right? Everybody's buying.

Speaker 1 You can't beat that, but what you can do is be really great at taking care of your people,

Speaker 1 your customers, making sure it's easy for them. Make sure you deliver faster.
Make sure the returns are easier. Make sure you have a connection.
Make sure you know what they want.

Speaker 1 Make sure they can actually talk to a person. And I think we've gotten really good at that over the last two years, especially.

Speaker 1 You know, Jerry used to say, all of our work will catch up with us one day. And it has.

Speaker 1 And I think I'm investing a lot of time and money into making that better and being there with the people i think that makes a big difference uh you know i did 40 cities this year in literally um 64 days or something 40 cities it was crazy in the us yes and i'm leaving you know monday for southeast asia and doing a tour out there and i think i wouldn't have been able to do it unless this were right and unless i was on you know, didn't know where I was going.

Speaker 1 And I do.

Speaker 2 Right.

Speaker 1 And I think, you know, even in the fog of grief, my mind is clear enough to say, I know what I need to do. I still got to do the hardest things first.
Yeah. I still need to believe that I'm possible.

Speaker 1 I still need to believe that our best days are still ahead. When at first, somebody told me that I was like, that's impossible.
My best days are behind me.

Speaker 2 Right.

Speaker 1 But there are still the best days of Lauren still ahead. And it took me a while to figure that out and accept that and be okay with that and embrace that.

Speaker 1 That doesn't mean I don't miss Jare every moment of my day, don't wish he wasn't with me.

Speaker 1 But in order to succeed,

Speaker 1 I have to show people it's possible and I'm rebuilding me again.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 1 And I think that when you're doing that with people and you're very vulnerable

Speaker 1 and very transparent about the process of where I've been and where I'm going and how painful it's been, and that we can recover. If we're transparent, life can change for you in a positive way.

Speaker 1 And I'm learning that now.

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Now let's get back to the Ultimate Human podcast. I think so too.

Speaker 2 I think you actually just inadvertently answered a question I asked you earlier about how do you stay at the top of the game, right?

Speaker 2 I mean, you built this incredibly profound company and, you know, a multi-billion dollar company from $25 weeks to $5 billion company.

Speaker 2 And,

Speaker 2 you know, I'm always curious about what keeps people there. But when you start saying things, I could do the hard thing first.
Yeah. So now you're not complacent.
Yeah. Right.

Speaker 2 I mean, there you are at the top of the game. You've got the yacht.
You've got the house. You've got a beautiful company.
You've got a great family.

Speaker 2 A tight group of friends, but you're like, my best days are still ahead. I still do the hard things first.

Speaker 2 I think there's a lot of wisdom in that that people can actually apply in their life is that, you know, we, as human beings, we aggressively seek comfort.

Speaker 2 You know, like I was saying, aging is the aggressive pursuit of comfort.

Speaker 2 We aggressively seek comfort instead of aggressively seeking to do the hard things first.

Speaker 2 And I think if you, if you adopted a philosophy where you did the hard things first and you truly believe that your best days were still ahead, this is how you maintain that.

Speaker 1 Exactly. People get so comfortable being uncomfortable.
It's like, are you kidding me? Do you not realize that in order to get uncomfortable, you've got to step one foot out of the box that you're in?

Speaker 1 That's all you have to do. They think it's monumental, so they don't want to do it rather than like sitting in front of the TV as comfortable and doing nothing and not changing.

Speaker 2 Most people would rather do nothing than do something that's uncomfortable. Well, of course.

Speaker 1 But what they don't realize is they're actually uncomfortable. Yeah.
They're living a life of discomfort. They're not able to make ends meet.
They're struggling to pay the bills.

Speaker 1 You know, they're not happy. They don't work on their marriage at home.
Right. You know, JR and I had a really happy life because we constantly worked at being good partners.

Speaker 1 We had a good marriage. We had good communication.
JR used to say, what do we do every six months? We analyzed our marriage. Really? What do you like about me and what don't you like about me?

Speaker 1 So I can fix that. Because I love you enough to want to make sure that I make a tweak.

Speaker 2 Oh, I'm sure my wife's got a list.

Speaker 1 We got a list over there. We're going to look at her.
Look at that face. She's like, she loves you.
Well, I said to her,

Speaker 2 she has a Dropbox file with her.

Speaker 1 You told her earlier earlier she deserved the big trophy. And you said, here I am.

Speaker 1 And so, you know, the funny thing is, is that people don't realize that when you're at home,

Speaker 1 being in a happy environment is really important. Oh, my gosh.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 I've had both. I mean, I've had, I've had miserable.
I know you're happy and I've had just meteorites.

Speaker 1 And I know your story. And when you walk in this house, it's a happy home.
Yeah. And that's the difference.
That can change your health too.

Speaker 2 No doubt.

Speaker 1 That changes your mindset. Yes.
And so

Speaker 1 some some days I just ask for Lauren time. Right.
You know, without everybody coming over, I just say, you know, guys, I got to have some me time. I'm figuring me out.

Speaker 1 You know, some days I have good days, I have bad days. But one thing for sure is like, I'm making sure who I put in my circle.
And of course, you and Sage are in my circle.

Speaker 1 You, you can come on our place at any time or I can go to your place at any time. You want to be at that table.
Yes. And everybody at that table wants to lift you up and elevate you.

Speaker 1 Say anything you're doing is possible. You can be or do anything you want to do.
Most people don't understand that if you've been cut out of my life, you gave me the scissors.

Speaker 2 Yeah, you gave me the scissors.

Speaker 1 You gave me the scissors. You're the one.
You're the one who cut you out of my life because I just have a certain way I'm going to live.

Speaker 1 And I only want to live with people who believe in what I'm doing and where I'm going. You don't have to do what I'm doing, but I need you to be a cheerleader of what I'm doing.

Speaker 1 I need you to support what I'm doing. I need you to believe in me so I can believe in myself also.

Speaker 1 I don't want to have anybody around me say, don't try that.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Don't go for that. Oh my God, Gary, don't you know? You cannot be transparent and honest without expecting controversy.

Speaker 2 I love that statement too. You're not going to be transparent and honest about without expecting controversy.

Speaker 1 People are so afraid to say their truth today.

Speaker 1 People are so afraid to have an honest conversation because like, oh my God, here she goes.

Speaker 2 Can't say who I'm voting for.

Speaker 1 She's black, but don't say you're a voting for. You can't even have a conversation about politics anymore.
It's ridiculous. I just want to, what happened to have good conversations.

Speaker 2 Fast, too.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I just want to have good conversation. Yes.
And so I think you know, we have done a very good job of keeping a circle where, you know what, it's okay to agree to disagree.

Speaker 2 Right.

Speaker 1 It's okay to say, you know what, I don't agree with you, Lauren. I have a different opinion.
And I say, you know what? I never thought about that opinion.

Speaker 1 And keeping an open mind because that's what real people who care about this will do.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 1 And I do think that that is the key to my health and my happiness is who I surround myself with because it helps my mind. Every day I met you, you've had the same inner, I mean, it's so true.

Speaker 2 Crying for decades before we met you.

Speaker 1 And I feel like people just, I'm over the, I don't want to be around anyone who pre-judge.

Speaker 1 I just don't want anybody who, who around me who wants to pre-judge anyone, a situation. I don't.
I want to keep an open mind. Right.
I want, I don't know what the future looks like.

Speaker 1 People say, well, what's the future of the company? I'm like, the future of the company is amazing.

Speaker 1 I see us getting bigger and better all the time.

Speaker 1 What is the future of Lauren? I'm not,

Speaker 1 I don't know yet. I'm still figuring her out.
It's like I'm still getting to know this new me.

Speaker 2 Right.

Speaker 1 I know that I'm going to have great days ahead of me and I'm now embracing that. Do I miss the Lauren with Jared? Of course.
I've missed those days all of my life.

Speaker 2 Right. I will, but I had that life.

Speaker 1 And that doesn't mean I lose it. And I do think that grief is just an extension of love in many ways.
And that it's, it's by how much you loved is how much grief you will suffer.

Speaker 1 And I do think that doing the hard things first and waking up in the morning and saying, I'm able to do this.

Speaker 1 I get to see my kids today. I get to pick up my kids from school.
I get to show up for work and be a great leader. Instead of saying, I have to do this, I have to do that.
I have to go to the gym.

Speaker 1 I get to go to the gym. Yeah.

Speaker 1 You know, when we start to act grateful for having this life that we can have around us and realize that you are actually uncomfortable because you haven't left that zone of discomfort for so long, you don't know how to get out.

Speaker 2 Right.

Speaker 1 We get so stuck behind the big boob tube and, you know,

Speaker 1 that dating yourself.

Speaker 2 I am dating myself.

Speaker 2 I know the boob tube.

Speaker 1 It's true, but we get so stuck.

Speaker 2 And we don't know our way out.

Speaker 1 And yet all we have to do is take one step outside the box in order for our life to change right

Speaker 1 and make a commitment like people you know i'm a big believer in in writing down my goals i do it all the time and i heard you talk about that i read them

Speaker 1 and uh you know people do it all the time at at new year's eve and i'm always like i'm not doing that because i do it all year long right and here's what happens with your new year's eve resolutions for most people and you i know you agree with this is that the only commitment they keep is breaking their commitment to themselves right And by January 20th, I think you just slowly let yourself down.

Speaker 2 I mean, you know, sometimes when you make a promise to yourself, I tell people, if you want to improve your own self-esteem, just make little promises to yourself and keep them.

Speaker 2 Say, I'm going to go to bed at 10 o'clock and go to bed at 10 o'clock.

Speaker 2 Like when you tell yourself you're going to go to bed at 10 o'clock and get in bed at one in the morning, you know, you broke that promise to yourself.

Speaker 2 And I think you slowly erode your confidence in yourself.

Speaker 1 When you said to me, I'll never forget it, when you first saw me for the first time and I was on the boat and you were like, I was like, I'm going to start that diet on Monday.

Speaker 1 You're like, What's wrong with today?

Speaker 2 Yes, that's right.

Speaker 1 What's wrong with today? And the truth of the matter is, how many times do we hear people say, I'm going to start next week?

Speaker 2 Right.

Speaker 1 As if Monday starting is going to cause you to lose more weight than starting today. Yeah, do it now.
But we do it all the time, and we see people do it. I just don't want to do that.

Speaker 1 You don't want to do that. And I think that's the key for people to succeed: to do exactly what you said right now.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I mean, Lauren, you're amazing. And I hope that we can

Speaker 2 continue to do these podcasts. And so

Speaker 2 I love us checking back in on each other's careers. And I think, I think there is an opportunity for us to really do something special like we talked about in the kitchen.

Speaker 1 I think you're just scratching the scratch of the surface.

Speaker 1 I don't even think you've gotten, you don't even know Gary Brecca yet. Like, as well as I know you, I don't know Gary Brecca yet.
You don't know Gary.

Speaker 1 You're just, as Jared used to say, Gary's just scratching the scratch on the surface.

Speaker 2 Wow.

Speaker 1 And you have so much more to do. The, the,

Speaker 1 What you have given to me and my family is life and more years. And that's a gift that you can't pay somebody back for.
You know, Jerry used to say, Lauren, it's not about the money.

Speaker 1 It's about the people we'll help along the way.

Speaker 1 Nothing could ring truer for you.

Speaker 2 I really appreciate that.

Speaker 1 You know, I have all the right friends, the Beckhams, everybody, right? They're all the Gruntmans.

Speaker 1 We all have the same circle of friends, and we all feel the same way.

Speaker 2 We talk about

Speaker 1 them them too yeah you know we we love you and how much you put into people you really put into people like jr did and that's what our business is about you know that's what shop and market america become about the people right for for you and i i think we're just starting i think there's so many big things that we can it's inspiring for me because i think Like I said, all the technology in the world will never be a Gary Recca.

Speaker 1 Wow. We'll never be a JR writinger.
And I think that's what the world needs more of.

Speaker 2 Thank you so much.

Speaker 2 Thank you. I wind every podcast down by asking my guests the same question.
There's no right or wrong answer to this question.

Speaker 2 And that is, what does it mean to you to be an ultimate human?

Speaker 1 Gosh, I think at this point in my life, the ultimate human means,

Speaker 1 number one, happiness. I think happiness is so important.

Speaker 2 Health

Speaker 1 and a clear mind. Wow.
And owning my mind again.

Speaker 1 And I think that's what, you know, the ultimate human is for me because I want to own this again and it gets cloudy during grief and so for me I always understood the value of how important it is to keep our mind sharp but it's it's health happiness and and owning this again the clear mind it's I think it can change the world you know if we're clear well I think this is message is going to be very special and inspiring to a lot of people and I super appreciate you.

Speaker 2 I love you.

Speaker 1 And this has been such an honor for me and being in this ultimate human penthouse is so inspiring that I do not want to go. I'm going home and get my back.
But what did our audience sing today?

Speaker 2 What did you guys think?

Speaker 2 I can't wait to see all this live audience today.

Speaker 1 This live audience podcast is you never had this before. No, I mean, I love you, Tom Brady.
I love you, The Rock, and all the guys you interviewed on here,

Speaker 1 but this one is the first live audience.

Speaker 2 This is the first live audience. Me,

Speaker 1 I love you guys. All right, thank you, Barry.
I love you.

Speaker 2 And as always, guys, that's just science.