#594 - Glenny Balls

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We're getting into the final shows for the Return of the Rat tour.

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July 9th, we'll be in Philadelphia, Rochester,

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Then we're in Detroit after that.

Moving on, we're in Los Angeles, Anaheim.

at the Honda Center in Oceanside, California.

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And just thank you so much for your support.

Today's guest is an entertainer and a podcaster.

You know him as half of the Sunday Conversation team with Caleb Presley.

He's a bit of a cheese sommoyer, amongst other things.

I just got back from spending the weekend with him in Las Vegas.

Today's guest is Glenny Ball.

Yeah, dude, good to see you, man.

Are we on?

Yeah, I guess

I don't know.

Good to see you.

Yeah.

We spent all weekend together, but good to see you again.

Nice to see you still.

Yeah, it's been a good 30-hour break between us.

That's a good point, dude.

Yeah, I like that Native American garb you have.

This is my mom.

She forced me to get it today.

We went shopping on Broadway today because I'm here with my parents.

And I said, big podcast.

I've been traveling for a week.

I got to go buy a new shirt.

Went to one of the stores on Broadway, saw this, and she said, you got to try this one.

It was either between this or a denim one.

And the denim was a little

tight when I sat down.

It was only an XL.

And the last time I did this podcast, I was wearing, my shirt was absolutely screaming for help.

It was a lot.

So I got to make sure there was citability.

I was sitting on steps in stores today.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

And they should have a shirt that if something's going, it lets you know somehow.

Cause you don't, a lot of times you don't know.

There'll be times I'll leave the house buttons completely uneven and nobody says hey buddy hey it's bad it's bad like when i saw you're you're a good t-shirt guy i think i've only seen you in t-shirts actually when you came to do our last sunday conversation the shirt you wore there was a sick button down i still want to find out where you got that from because that was a cool button down nice i would have worn that today oh that is a nice shirt yeah for some reason i don't like i don't feel i don't know i don't feel acclimated in really nice stuff i think it makes me feel uncomfortable no I mean, Saturday night when we went to UFC, the first thing I wore was, I wore a $20 shirt from Target.

It was fantastic.

Those Goodfellow shirts.

They're great.

They're like beachy shirts.

$20.

I just showed you.

I brought up Bucky's t-shirt with me.

$24.

Fantastic.

I can't really justify spending a few hundred bucks on a shirt.

I don't know how to do that yet.

Yeah, I think I'm trying.

Yeah, I don't like.

I just don't like trying stuff on.

I know certain t-shirts.

I know how they're going to fit.

I'm very basic with that kind of stuff, you know?

But yeah, dude, that looks like a very, I'm trying to think.

that's like a Native American sort of

Sturgis,

like

very Dakotas, something Dakota about it.

Yes.

I hope it's not cultural appropriation.

I did buy it on Broadway today.

It was in Boot Barn.

It was in Boot Barn for the record.

If it is, it's Boot Barn's fault.

I'm sure, dude, first of all, our whole country is cultural appropriation.

So can we just guess?

Like, is there anything?

Dude,

yeah, I'm sure there's not a native.

I just hope it's okay to wear wear with a cheese store hat yeah that's a good point those two have never been together before

well it's said that we took over the american's land to build a cheese store too but it's also

it tastes so good dude that's so good i went to the cheese store last week it was fantastic as always oh if you get a comfortable brie it's like sometimes you you want to swallow it but you want it to stay in your mouth and brie is basically like butter it's legitimate butter it's it's unbelievable brie is like the gayest butter you could ever get and it's and i'm all for it.

Yeah.

I'm all for it.

With some roasted red peppers and a little, oh,

it's good.

It just feels like a, I can't even explain how great it feels.

Look, because look at it.

If you look at Brie, first of all, it's cream on the inside, clean on the outside.

It kind of looks like a cake.

What I'm looking at right now, it does look a cake.

And it's a very, very freeing feeling to spread some good Brie, knowing how good it's going to be.

Yes.

It's, it's nice.

Yeah, because a lot of the, and let's go, let's go down a brief charcuterie lane here.

A lot of,

a lot of charcuterie boards, right?

Because that stuff became popular in the past three years.

People are charcutering, you know, white chicks were like looking for something to do.

That's truly what it is because I've always thought to myself, this is so stupid.

Why is anybody taking the time to do this?

And now I kind of get it.

I've been trying to make my own charcuterie boards.

Really?

Not, I'm not good at it at all.

Actually, I take that back.

I'm not trying to make my own charcuterie boards.

I've just, I've been enjoying just like, I guess, prepping food and just like presenting it in a nice way whenever whenever i'm doing anything with food it's fun to take the extra time to make it kind of look nice and i'm not very good at it i'm still learning but like if i'm cutting a steak it is fun to like place it exactly how it should be you know yeah like on the bone just make it look nice i don't know i and i actually enjoy prepping like when i cook i enjoy cutting onions i enjoy cutting tomatoes i think it's fun yeah i like the thrill of possibly something happening Yeah, no, I do.

You know, there is something fun about, there's something fun.

Like, if you, somebody like, here, cut this, and you're like,

and then it's all cut.

You're like,

we did that.

I did that.

It's fun to see it.

Like, you could buy diced onions.

I'd be rather dice my own onion.

I actually cut myself a few weeks ago doing it, but I survived.

But hey, you're a guy who's willing to get in there, get into the produce trenches, get into these kind of vegetable Vietnam situations where shit gets kind of intense.

Yes, and sometimes you lose.

I lost a few weeks ago.

But okay.

But yeah, so what makes a good charcuterie board?

Like, is it an evening out of like sweet and like

robust?

Like, what is it, Glenny?

That is one thing that I will say that I do love on charcuterie board that I've been getting into a lot.

Like, I've been more inclined to ordering this on a restaurant menu when they have charcuterie.

Shout out to my guy, Josh, our producer, Josh, you met, nice little fellow.

He has recently taught me about jams.

And like, and I love when there's a, like, if we're traveling and there's a little jam on a table at breakfast, I'm starting to put that on the bread, on the toast, which is actually fantastic.

And there's some great jams on charcuterie boards, and I've been loving the jam with the crackers and the cheese.

It's oddly a good, creamy, sweet scenario.

So the jam has been my favorite part.

And obviously, you can meet.

You can't get the meat from 7-Eleven.

I've been spoiled at the cheese store because they do bring out like stuff from Italy, which is obviously creme de la creme.

But that's that place in LA that you love.

Yeah.

Yeah.

If I was going to go, you'd offer to take me, but we'll have to do it another time, dude.

Okay, so the jams, there's definitely, I do notice a lot of times you'll see the jam on there that has like

the seeds in it.

yeah and that to me it's just like i've never really liked like really rich stuff you know like i remember one time we went to my my dad had a girlfriend um sorry mom uh my dad had a girlfriend and we went over and she was rich dude like she had a balcony she had a lot of shit we went over to her house and

she was doing thanksgiving and she had like cranberries but it was like real bare like

you know i've talked about this years ago but there was like there's different grades of cranberry.

You can get like the

jelly.

It's basically somebody just open up a smucker's, cut it into slices, and you eat it like that.

Like our mom would do that.

Sometimes she would put the jelly into the freezer for like an hour and a half.

Yeah.

Oh, this is, this is actual cranberry sauce.

We would, there was a grade below that where you would just have like semi-frozen grape jelly.

Ooh, kind of like, look at that picture in the middle.

It kind of looks like it.

I get what you're saying.

I feel like that almost feels more authentic, though.

Right, I agree.

And then you got regular cranberry sauce, the jellied stuff.

And then you got the one that kind of had the mix.

And then rich people that just had actual cranberries that were kind of smashed or like abused or whatever.

They'd been through the system or foster care, whatever.

And they had those like in a special bowl.

And she had those.

And I couldn't even stomach it.

Like it just made me so scared.

It's probably so good, though, with some real turkey.

Some good authentic, that you said it was Thanksgiving, some good Thanksgiving turkey.

Like that's another thing I've been enjoying on Thanksgiving, the cranberry sauce.

The sweet and savory is, it really is a delight.

Yeah.

I've been doing some pervert stuff recently with like

getting a getting a chocolate bar, like taking a Hershey's and taking a pretzel and just doing it myself.

Because you could buy chocolate covered pretzels, but if you get the little do-it-yourself, take one square of Hershey, one bite of a pretzel together in the same bite, it's a joy.

Wait, so you're doing this at home?

So my buddies live, my three best friends live like five minutes from my house.

So I go there all the time.

Okay.

And we do some bad, some bad eating every now.

And then Sunday nights really get us.

They get us.

They get us big time.

And Sunday nights, too.

The Sunday nights are terrible.

Yeah.

We'll do sometimes we'll do candy.

I don't even like candy and we'll do do candy.

Like nerd, like nerd busters, whatever those are.

New busters.

All that.

Yeah.

And my buddies are in shape.

They're in shape guys.

They're not like

big guys.

Are you just using them to go over there and have those snacks, do you think?

Is that like a crazy thing?

Because

I used to bicycle over to my buddy's dad's house to

look at their pornos and pornography.

Same.

But yeah, no, I mean, I think it's a mutual thing.

It's mutual.

It's mutual.

They love it.

They love it more than me, honestly.

I don't want man eating nerd ropes late at night or whatever.

To me, that is.

It's just the Sunday nights.

Sunday nights will get you bed.

They will.

It's Sunday night.

If they didn't even exist, I would maybe have a six-pack.

I'm bad at Sunday nights.

I'm bad at Sunday nights.

Especially if you think you have a good weekend and then it's like, oh.

Oh, yeah.

You make it through that weekend.

You get to Sunday.

You're kind of surviving.

And then it gets late in the day.

And

if you had any fucking balls and if you hadn't bought a vape,

you could go to bed in two hours.

But something happens to you where you start looking in your pantry and like, yeah, I'll make a cake like there's been a cake box in there you're like i can eat a bunch of peanut butter right now i i love peanut butter and apple that's a thing too that some days are killing me because i've been trying so my peak weight that i've ever weighed was 355 years ago like six years ago i was a big boy yeah is there any photos

looking that is yes oh my god you were on the cusp of getting one of those shows

yeah so i was a big boy like 2018 it was 2018 i think i weighed myself and it was 355 and like labor day weekend of 2018.

And then, so now I'm like sitting at like, that's pretty big right there.

Wow.

Ew.

Oh my gosh.

Ew.

Look at that Billy Joel shirt.

Ew.

God.

Oh, my God.

That's disgusting.

Look at that Billy Joel billboard.

Jesus.

That is a billboard.

That shirt could

put three people in that shirt.

Well, you definitely increased the font of it when you put it on.

That's for sure.

That Auburn picture on the left there with Marina and Chuck.

That's a big boy.

Jesus Christ.

That's you.

Yes.

Nuh.

Zoom in a little bit.

Oh my God.

That's literally.

Look like somebody poisoned ya.

I needed to get poisoned to lose some weight.

Wow.

And what were you doing for work?

Were you like one of those secret people that eats at restaurants?

No, but you know,

you know what the problem was.

I was working at Barstill and it was in Manhattan.

So I would get like fucking like...

I went to the place toasties all the time.

It was like chicken cutlet and bacon heroes for lunch.

You can't have that for lunch.

If you're a normal person, you got to have a salad for lunch or like a bowl, a Chipotle bowl.

You can't be banging out chicken cutlet, bacon, heroes for lunch.

You just can't do it.

Yeah.

If you're dinner lunching, then you are.

Exactly.

So that's what I was, that's, but what I was going to say is

since my top, since my top peak weight, I'm at like 355.

So I'm sitting right now at like 257 and I'm dying.

I want to take all my friends and family when I finally hit 255, 100 to Outback to celebrate at Outback.

Yeah.

But I've just been sitting at 257.

And what I'm saying is there were no Sunday nights, I think I would be at 255.

I'm so close.

Actually, I weighed myself the other day at our hotel in Vegas.

They had scales in the room, which was mean.

There should never be a scale in a hotel room.

Well, those are for drugs.

It was a human scale.

I was like, it's interesting.

You're like, whoa, Glenny's balancing on this very small scale in here.

And then Saturday, Saturday morning, I woke up and I was like, it was just staring at me, like telling me, come in, get on me, get on me.

Come here, white boy, or whatever.

Was it set to urban or whatever?

Because sometimes it'll be like, get in here, honky.

It was just staring at me.

You both sink.

Get on.

I got on.

There you go.

And it was 254.8.

But I'm not calling it official until I get one Monday and it's under 255.

Then we're going out back.

Yeah.

That's fair.

Monday weigh-ins.

I've been doing Monday, but I'm also thinking I got to stop doing every Monday because then if I have a good week, I'll let myself go a little bit.

I want to start doing like monthly, I think.

I think monthly is the key.

Monthly weigh-ins?

I think that's the key.

Well, a lot of people, they have bracelets now, and it's like, you're fat right now.

Like they'll have that, that

whatever that thing.

It'll be like,

you're a pervert or or whatever someone's supposed to tell you your blood pressure it's like you're a pervert yeah after sunday night yeah you're like you're 40 feet from a gay guy or whatever you're like what who cares like that's why i don't have an apple watch and sometimes it'll the volume will just be turned up and you're like what the hell that's my stepdad you know what i'm saying you're like yes some of those watches it's just like starting to take over our lives yeah um the watches scare me everything's crazy the technology is crazy oh it's getting crazy man uh but yeah i want to go back to the charcuterie i mean charcuterie's I'm not into it yet.

I said I was into it before.

I did not mean that.

I mentioned food preparation in general.

I think eventually I could see myself getting into it because it does seem like a thing, like 10 years down the line, like when you're a little older and you just want to hang out, it's something to do.

Like you said, for like old white women, it's just something to do, just to preparation and then show off, show off to the group.

Oh, I'm having a Super Bowl party.

They're going to make a sick charcuterie.

Yeah, I think, well,

I think, well, it also gets obtuse at certain corners of the charcuterie board because you have the crackers and the cheese.

I get that, right?

And I remember I saw one one time at somebody's house and they had that little knife.

You ever seen that little knife?

It's for like a Japanese, like boy or whatever.

Like a, it kind of, it's like very little and it has like a little thing on the end.

It's like kind of a you mean like a spreader knife?

Yes.

Yeah, like it's not even sharp.

It's not even sharp.

No, it's like the spread debris.

Right.

It's like a knife that like something happened.

You know what I'm saying?

It goes to, it's in special lead or whatever, right?

It's still a knife.

Don't tell it.

Don't put it near real knives, right?

It's still a great knife,

but it's not serrated.

It'll never be serrated.

It'll never be sharp.

It is for spreading, right?

It's for just like paint by number type of shit, right?

But yeah, I remember the first time I saw that, I had to, I was like, oh, this is like for a little Japanese guy or something.

And I was like, oh, I'm stealing this.

I'm fucking stealing this.

I love that photo.

That was a cleaver there.

I just got a cleaver for Christmas recently.

Really?

I feel very, very happy about it.

It's very good.

My uncle got me a really cool cleaver.

Yeah.

It's kind of fulfilling dreams of mine.

It's very, it's extra manly to cut something with a meat cleaver.

Oh, zooming on that cleaver a little.

Looks like a little baby cleaver, too.

That looks like a child one.

Yeah, which is

not for children.

Yeah, look at it in comparison to the other knives.

That must be like a literally a little cheese cleaver, a little baby cheese cleaver.

Yeah.

Really, cut your pinky.

You can only cut your pinky with.

Oh, God, dude.

Yeah, but once, but then the Shakurdu on the out on the outriggers of the Shark, they put like these little

pickles, right?

And they're, and they're way undersized.

I don't want to say that they're premature or whatever, but they, nobody should have harvested.

Whoever harvested them did it at night and probably was sex trafficking or whatever.

It's like, nobody should pick these.

Yeah, I think those are called Gherkin pickles, if I do.

Yeah.

Say it correctly?

I think.

Why did my voice just do that?

But yeah, Gherkin pickles.

I believe those are called.

I'm not a fan of them.

I'm still getting into pickles.

That's way one thing that I've

haven't loved my whole life.

Really?

But I've been enjoying it more.

It's odd too, though, because I do love a relish on hot dog.

Yeah, me too.

I do love a relish on a hot dog.

And not just pickles, but just straight up pickles.

Sometimes I don't know.

They don't do it for me.

Yeah, but relish is like pickles.

That's like, yeah, motherfucker, what's up?

We're here.

Put some mustard on me.

We rise.

I will die for relish.

I'll eat relish by it.

I could eat relish by itself.

Like, I don't do it, but I could.

I love relish.

Fantastic.

Hot dog, mustard, relish, boom.

Easy.

Love it.

Yeah.

One thing I do like about a hot dog time is I will do a hot dog, right?

Some people will do like they'll DP a hot dog.

They'll put like two francs in it or whatever.

I don't do that.

Have you ever done Chicago hot dog?

It's my favorite type of hot dog.

Oh, my much.

Oh, wait.

Yeah.

I was at the Chicago Cubs game.

Yeah.

I believe Vienna beef dog.

I think they gave us some up there.

It was very nice.

Yes, there you go.

Unbelievable.

Poppy seed buns, sport peppers, mustard, relish, tomato slice, pickle.

It's the best.

That's a pickle I like.

But on that Chicago hot dog, they literally put the whole pickle spear on it.

So it's kind of hard to eat, I will say.

They should put pickle slices on it.

But everything together in there is one of my favorite bites in the world.

I love a Chicago hot dog.

And do they use a special type of bun for that?

Usually it's a poppy seed bun, I'm pretty sure.

I think that's the traditional way.

I do enjoy like a split-top bun.

Split-top bun is nice.

I mean, that's good.

I'm a big, I'm...

I'm very high on Chicago.

I think it's the best food city in the country.

Oh, yeah.

I would watch you eat that, man.

That looks cool.

Yeah.

You know?

One time we were in Chicago at the same time.

We'll share what.

Yeah.

I used to watch those videos of Japanese women eating big pieces of cake or whatever.

You ever seen that?

Like a mukbang?

Yeah, but it was before mukbanging.

It was just like when people, it was like, you know, because Japanese people are like the human ASMR, right?

Sure.

If you ever just been around a Japanese person, it's like.

listening to ASMR, but they're like in the room with you and they're just being themselves, right?

They're not even...

Like if a Japanese person whispers in the woods, who the fuck would ever know, dude?

You can't even hear them.

you know?

So it's like, they're just so quiet.

It's like, oh, shit, I don't know what I was talking about.

But

yeah, anyway.

What were you talking about?

We were talking about some Chicago hot dogs.

But speaking of food, we shared a great steak Friday night.

Ooh, we did.

I felt really bad, though, because I could tell when the waiter asked me what I liked, how I liked to cook, and I said medium rare.

There was so much disappointment on your face and you wanted medium.

And I felt really bad about it since then.

So I just wanted to apologize for that.

Oh, well, thanks, dude.

Well, I've been trying to do this thing where if somebody makes a suggestion, I go along with it instead of always just,

you know, I'm usually like, like if somebody wants to go see a movie, if I don't want to see it, nah, always, right?

Never.

Like, don't you want to come?

Nah, do not.

So this was like something practicing for me.

Like somebody's like, hey, let's have a steak.

This is how I like it.

And I was like, oh, I hate.

I don't want that.

But tried it.

Loved it.

It was a fan.

It was, that was one of the better steaks I've had out in a long time.

I agree.

It was really, really good.

Where were we at?

It was, I think it was called Don's Prime.

Don's Fountain Blue in Vegas.

It was one of the better steaks I've had in a long time.

Yeah, I agree.

And I'll say what even made it good, I think for me, let's tell each other what they thought made it good.

For me, it wasn't

overwhelmed with like seasoning and too much juice, like too juice.

Like sometimes juice is, it's nice, but it was just kind of perfect.

It didn't like get the plate all blood.

It was just kind of perfectly like hey it almost like it showed up and was like hey, I know

I'm fucking the shit.

Yeah, because they kept telling us they as soon as we sat down They said oh, this is from some sick farm in Idaho.

Yeah.

This is good meat and we all said oh that's the one we're getting and it made it made me happy to see because like there's so many times where I'm sitting around at these restaurants and you hear about all these details about the meat and it comes and it's whatever that you could taste the difference.

That was really one of the better steaks I've ever had.

Oh, I agree, man.

It was great.

And we split up.

It was the perfect amount because we're still going to go out for a bit.

We weren't too weighed down, like leaning on the speaker in the corner of the bar.

Um,

dude, one thing, uh, what they're always like, yeah, this calf, it was like tickled by tall kids or whatever.

You're like, well,

yeah, the Japanese, the Wagu, they're going through everything.

They're eating good there.

Like, they're feeding them just grass-fed.

It's just they're just eating grass all their lives.

But, um, like, Japanese people whisper directly into the skin of this animal while it was being raised.

You know, it's like,

it's like raised in a two-bedroom apartment.

You're like, holy shit some of this meat sounds very fancy um but yeah it's like it's so scary to also to think about i always do this too many times like to think about truly how many animals there are if all of this food is being given to people it's so scary to think what are you saying like how many like chickens are murdered or not not murdered but killed a day like so many like even i'm just trying to think about this reason like if i order uh an order of wings at a bar and there's 10 wings in there does that technically mean that i'm having five chickens?

Like two wings a chicken?

I think there are some chickens that have more than two.

206 million a day.

Globally, approximately 206 million chickens are killed for food each day.

It's wild stat.

What?

So wild stat.

Holy shit, dude.

It's like...

Since we started talking about this, 140,000 chickens just died.

Oh, that's wild.

That's the original Gaza right there, dude.

That's crazy.

I can't believe they're doing that.

In the United States alone, the number is around 26 million chickens.

That means that roughly 140,000 chickens are slaughtered every minute.

But hold on.

How many people live in America?

I think it's 350 million.

I think that sounds right.

It's around there, I think.

So you're saying?

Yeah, 340.

340 million, 26 million chickens a day.

Mm-hmm.

So that means one out of,

I'm trying to do this math.

I'm not very good at math.

It's like one out of 13, maybe?

14?

I don't know.

I think 340 divided by 26 is around 36.

It's right.

12.

Wow.

So one out of 13 people every day is having a chicken.

Which seems kind of low.

I thought it seemed right on time.

Really?

Yeah.

Because I think children don't eat a lot of chicken because they're so little and they can't, and you shouldn't give expensive food to children.

I had chicken today.

Yeah.

I had a chicken sandwich.

You already had it?

Yeah, I ordered a grilled chicken sandwich from Pot Belly today, right before I came.

I need something in the system.

You want to know what happened to me yesterday that I'm actually really disappointed about?

Yeah.

And I hope that whoever did this sees this podcast and come catch me outside but yesterday i was out me and my parents did one of those party buses and then a photo of it beautiful picture we'll include the picture nice photo and then i went to one of these party buses and then we all went back to the hotel afterwards and i was pretty hungry i ordered some chick-fil-a to be there when i get there

someone stole it no someone stole it i was actually pooping i was in the bathroom it got delivered at 4 23 p.m i heard the guy guy knock on the door left it outside 436 i opened the door vanished into the night somebody stole it i was furious.

I've never been one to like rad, but I was very close to going to the hotel and be like, Do you have cameras?

I need to see who did this because I got more chicken.

And you know what I'm really, I'm really hoping for?

Like, when I order my Chick-fil-A, I do it every time I travel.

I just get a bunch of grilled nuggets and spicy fillets with no bread.

I hope those bastards were drunk and thought it was sandwiches and tenders and good shit.

And they just opened it to a huge pack of grilled nuggets.

I hope that fucked them over.

I'm so, it got me so mad.

Oh, I fucking hope those pieces of shit fucking choke.

It's just, it's just a lot.

Don't take what's not yours.

Yeah.

That's it.

Yeah, I hope they fucking choke on that shit.

I hope they get a fucking waffle fry that never leaves their system.

Damn.

So now I know I have a thief on my floor.

Every time I've left my hotel room, I know someone is around dude.

Oh, yeah.

I just want to start yelling, banging a bell, being like, I know one of you did this.

Dude,

we have to be able to get footage of it.

What hotel was it at?

Yeah, I can say, because I'll be gone.

It's Cambria downtown in Nashville, Tennessee, sixth floor.

I'm room 614.

Someone stole my Chick-fil-A, and I'm live about it.

And what could you have done?

Dude, 13 minutes leaving Chick-fil-A at your doorstep for 13 minutes is a long time.

On a Monday afternoon, though, I thought it was a Monday afternoon.

I haven't even seen anybody in the hallway yet.

And the guy sent me the photo.

It was right outside the room, 6.14.

It was right outside there.

And then vanished.

Did it sound like he set it down completely and left it?

Or could you hear any more like he might have been the guy to come do it?

I hope he wasn't the guy to do it because that would.

That would be bad.

That would be tough for DoorDash.

I love DoorDash.

Oh, yeah.

They're the fucking Navy SEALs of our generation.

I love DoorDash.

To roll, I mean, Tim Dylan and I had a big conversation about this.

To roll up silently to a door as quietly as you can, leave something completely fucking delectable, right?

Evade dogs, evade dangerous brothers probably trying to rob you, like all types of shit, you know, evade hungry people.

That's my biggest pet peeve about nice hotels.

Like when you stay in a nice hotel, the DoorDashers can't get up to you.

Because of the key, because of the key.

Like this past weekend, we were staying at a nice hotel in Vegas.

They can't get up to you.

So you have to go down.

You have to go down and pick up the food.

But at a decent hotel like a Cambria, they could walk right up.

There's no security.

Oh, really?

They just let them up the room.

I didn't have to go down to the lobby or anything.

And then I run to the door and I open it in my underwear and make sure no one's around, grab it.

Yeah.

We try to lean forward, just get your door open and just try to grab it off the ground.

Dude, the hotel rooms are crazy how much you're just hiding from everybody.

It's like

an interesting experience to think about.

I was talking about this with our producer Kelsey recently, too, about just how much Sunday conversations.

We love Kelsey.

Just how much like sex do you think has been in every hotel room you've been in?

Like in Vegas especially.

Oh, I can't even imagine how many people have even just jerked off on the floor in my room.

Yeah, if a hotel has been, if a hotel has been open for 20 years, it's had, like, I wonder how each, how much each room has seen.

It's scary to think about because there's no way it's being properly sterile.

No way.

Do you, I don't know how you could properly sterilize it unless you use like EcoShield or one of those companies that comes and does the,

you know,

I mean, you'd have to use some type of a high-grade cleaner.

What would you have to do?

Pressure wash the carpet or whatever?

Truly no idea.

What do they always say?

No, you should have bring a black light into a hotel because he knows what's on the walls.

Yeah.

Right.

Yeah.

That's that's a, that's weird for me.

And also my hotel is a very odd hotel.

It's the only hotel.

I got to see a picture of it.

It's the only hotel room I've ever been in.

The bed is in the middle of the room.

Like, like it's not next to any walls, if that makes sense.

That's a normal room.

But it's, there's, I'm telling you, I'll send it.

I'll send you a photo.

it's just the bed is in the middle of the room i've never seen anything like it oh i get dizzy in there i think then just trying to even just figure out how to get to the bathroom and get caught in a tailwind like last night my mom came into my into my room to get me to go out and it was yeah that's it they're just in the middle of the room

there's a walkway behind it there's a bar behind it

Yeah, that's too much.

I don't, I like my bed in a corner.

I like to eliminate all possibility of things attacking me or whatever.

That's how I sleep in complete fear.

I do love a good hotel view, though.

I'm a sucker for a good view.

i love a good view we went to power slap unbelievable what did you think it was your first time unbelievable i mean being thanks to you obviously we were in the first row being that close and seeing it hearing it the heat the sounds of it is the craziest part yeah i can't believe they though my only complaint actually is the big the bigger guys at the end they're so big they don't fall so the third guy what was his name blackburn he was a nut it was awesome because those guys were falling i don't know if you remember the one guy fell friggin he got slapped and then his he fell so hard his face hit the middle thing they use.

He got double hit.

It was unbelievable.

PowerSlap was awesome.

It wasn't, we were almost saying it was like it's more of like a party environment, like just talking to everybody, hanging out.

And then it's like, instead of a band just playing, it's just big guys get slapped.

Yeah, it's kind of like you're sitting there having a snack or chatting or having an ice water or something.

And then you can feel everybody's about somebody's about to slap somebody in the corner of the room.

Everybody literally goes silent for one second, looks over.

Somebody slaps the living lights out of somebody else.

And then, oh,

and it's so cool because, like, we also, me and Caleb went to our first UFC Saturday.

Like, there's a fewers, a few moments where you saw something, you're like, and you make that face, you make that face every single fight in PowerSlap.

Yeah.

Every single time you see it, it's just holy, literally, holy shit.

Oh, it's overwhelming.

And the one big guy, remember, he did, he was going right, and then he just started to hit with his left.

That was a stunning moment.

Yeah, he's like the cow ripped in a fucking power slap, whatever.

That did not play.

Yeah, he can play from both sides.

He was on, I don't even think he, and I think he did announce it because then they kept saying, oh, he's going left this time.

He's going left.

I thought it was a surprise.

I thought he was surprised left, but it wasn't.

Oh, it would be great when they announced.

This is one thing that's about power slap.

They announce like, all right, it's left on one.

It just tells you like, so you like what hand he's using.

It's just a wild scene.

It's a wild scene.

And there's all, first of all, there's all these influencers there, right?

So you're like, everybody's like an influence.

It's like, oh, yeah, have you met Salad Boy or whatever?

And it's like, who?

And they're like, yeah, this is Salad Boy.

He can, he, uh, they're like, he doesn't have any arms, but watch him mix up this salad or whatever.

You're like, he's like, I've mixed over 2,000 salads.

People that walk in the room with the risers clearly there.

Yeah.

I wish he was there.

But yeah, it's like Salad Boy.

Or then, like, there was like a black guy and he's like, oh, this is my son.

He, he, oh, you've seen him on TikTok.

He counted to a million one time.

You're like, I don't give a fuck.

You see the kid asking you for money?

Yeah, oh no.

That this was the best, though.

But yeah, they're like, hey, will you just do a video of my son?

Just you guys count to 20 together.

So I'm like, dude, I don't give a fuck, dude.

Don't do 10.

Yeah, dude, I'll do five with this kid, but I want to just go sit back down.

But the craziest thing that was happening at PowerSci was

that the boxer was there.

Terrence Crawford was there.

And he has a couple of beautiful young children.

I think they were his children.

I think they were too because they were around him most of the night.

Unless he was by us.

Yeah, he was like,

and the kids would come up to you and they'd be like, hey, give me $100, right?

But then you were talking to somebody else, and I was talking to the kid.

And I said, Oh, sorry, what are you asking him?

And he just goes, Oh, I lost the bet.

I want to see if I can have $100.

But then, at a certain point, I didn't bet with him, right?

Because I don't know him and he's a child or whatever.

And then he comes back a little while later and he's like, Pay up,

pay up, son.

He said, This kid is a six here.

And there was three of them, like a six, maybe an eight and a nine.

And they're like, Pay up, motherfucker, or whatever, or pay up, son, pay up.

So now I'm like, yeah, there's Terrence Carver with his hand right there.

Yeah, I think it was the one on the right.

It was him on the right.

And

so anyway, now you're like, well, I can't, I have to pay.

Like,

what if this kid goes back to his dad, one of the greatest fighters in the world, and goes, Dad, this guy lost a bet to me and won't pay it to me, dude?

Dude, that's it's so scary to think about, too.

Like, Terrence Carver could kill both of us

so easily.

And so easily.

All that kid has to go do is, dad, this guy's being that's all it needs for a dad to get activated and we're like fatherhood's gonna kick in and then who's done you and i guess me because i'm with you by proxy oh we're eating charcuterie through a freaking bag

through a colostomy bag

ew i can't have i could never have that happen to me man that would be sad oh it was so sad so yeah i had to get each one of these kids like 40 and i'm like these kids are hitman and they were going to every person in there i bet those kids made six racks in there did you actually give them the money yeah what the hell are you gonna do the one kid had freaking cornrows

Yeah.

Here.

Have a great time.

I hope you're a big one for it.

We got to see some slaps, made some money.

He was on the clock.

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You know, everyone is health hacking these days, bio hacking.

People want to live forever.

I was at a four-year-old's birthday party the other day.

He said he wanted to live to be 1100.

I'm like, dang, buddy.

If you are going to live that long, you're going to need to keep your NAD levels replenished.

That's what I'm talking about.

NAD.

I'm sure you've been hearing about it.

And between the ages of 30 and 70, your NAD levels drop off by 65%.

NAD, it's considered the battery pack of your cells.

Yeah, you want to keep your cells restored.

You want to keep them refreshed.

That's why there's true niogen.

Yep, true niogen.

It's real fountain of youth vibes, man.

It's a science-backed way to age better.

It's clinically proven to boost your NAD levels by up to 150%.

And it's backed by over 35 human clinical studies.

And some people are like, well, what is NAD?

What does it do?

Well, it just, it repairs and restores your cells, right?

That's it.

It doesn't give you like some crazy boost of energy.

It's a long-term play.

Andrew Huberman was on the podcast and we were talking about it.

And he said it's one of the top health hacks that that he could recommend.

So here's what I do now.

I take true niogen every single day.

And right now, this past weekend, listeners, get up to 25% off true niogen with code Theo.

Go to true niogen.com slash th-h-e-o.

That's t-r-u-n-i-a-g-e-n dot com slash theo and use code theo for up to 25 percent off your nad levels will thank me but yeah power slaps nuts man dude one one of the nuttiest things is, dude, they slap each other.

And then I remember the first time I ever went, I'm waiting for an Uber after it.

And one of the guys who had been slapped is waiting for the Uber line.

I'm like, what?

He didn't even just go to the cab.

Yeah, I think I'm like 95% sure.

Allegedly, it was the same dude.

I mean, his head was swollen and he looked like.

It had to be.

Their faces were so red.

And he got into the Uber showed up.

He gets in through the trunk of it.

I'm like, this guy is fucking their brain's got to be destroyed.

I'm just everything about it.

I don't, how do they train?

Who do they train with?

Who do they hit?

How does it, because if you're, if you're training with the guy and you're taking the hits, how could you not then want to be the hitter as well?

So who are you training?

That's a good point.

Who's the one just taking the hits?

Just them and training.

Yeah, dude.

If you're just doing hitting with, yeah, what guys can be like, y'all come over there and let you hit me 15 times so you can practice.

But yeah, I won't hit you back.

I'll just chill out.

Like, how could you not also want to be in Schmouter's lap?

Yeah.

So, dude, second slap into it, it looks like you've been fucking eating wasps or something.

It's like your whole face is swollen.

And some of the guys would get hit up high, like in the eye area.

One guy was taking chin because they were calling the fouls, too.

That didn't get hit in the head seemed scary.

One guy close to hit eye.

Eye was terrible.

It's just crazy.

And the one guy that was getting in the Uber one time, he's like, Yeah, man, I'm going to catch a movie with my girl or whatever.

And I was like, What the fuck?

You better sleep.

Yeah, you better, dude.

Anything actually, and I was like, dude, dude, anything that keeps you awake for three hours sounds good to us right now, dude.

I hope it's a long, I hope it's a damn time.

Do not rest.

God, my father wants to.

I mean, dude, it was a fun time.

It was, it was really cool.

I enjoyed it.

It was very cool.

It was

a man.

Shout out to

Nicole that helps us get over there and have fun.

And they have like, it is fun.

Like you're going in there and there's all these different like

like people that you've seen from like different things online, TikTok, everything.

Yeah, Max Crosby was there.

It was cool to meet Cheryl Hines.

Yeah.

She was such an angel.

I was so scared to say big fan.

I felt, I felt bad because she was hanging, but I'm a huge curb guy.

So I was like, I was, she was one person, I will say, that like me and Caleb's job, we do meet a lot of famous people.

I didn't know she was coming when I saw her.

I was like, wow.

It kind of took me back a little bit.

Like, I've just, I've just watched Curb my whole life.

So I was like, oh my God, Cheryl Hines.

Yeah, I've never seen Curb or Enthusiasm, but

I know people love it so much.

I'll probably watch it when I get married or something.

Good show.

12 seasons, though.

It's a long haul.

Really?

Yeah, Yeah, I just redid it a few months ago.

I decided to do a full rewatch.

At this age, do something else, man.

You can watch this shit later.

I know.

I mean, something if I'm like, like a Monday night, I got nothing to do.

I'll watch a show.

I'm thinking about doing a Sopranos re-watch.

I haven't watched Sopranos in a long time, honestly.

You should do that in a theater and have people come and have like a food experience for people.

Wow.

That's a good idea.

Kind of like our idea we were talking about at breakfast the other day.

Me and Caleb's idea.

I don't know if...

Yeah, you and Caleb need an Airbnb.

Yeah.

And then we, for the record, me and Caleb were thinking thinking about starting an Airbnb empire in three different cities and making it our own experience in each Airbnb.

I don't know if how we'll do it, but we may try.

It'd be great and like have like a confessional in it where people that are going there, if it's like a bachelor party or bachelorette, they can go in there and give a nice message to the bachelor or bachelorette.

Yeah, that confessional idea for me was a great idea.

You guys could compile those and make that like part of it.

And part of the experience, too, that you get this back, where you get a video of your weekend of just people popping in and saying nice things.

Stuff like that's important.

Yeah, almost like I agree.

people don't say enough nice things to people it's it's nice when people just are just saying like every now and then i'm gonna start doing it to you too every now and then if it's like a sunday and i'm maybe a little buzzed having some drinks with my friends and i'm in a good mood i'll just text people and be like hey mission hope all is well you're a good guy you're a stud

I think you do a really nice job of that, man.

You make people feel super welcome, I think.

You're like a welcome mat with black olives on the edges of it.

Ooh, I appreciate that.

That's the Greek side of me.

I mean, speaking of that, I got to commend you.

I mean same to you you're so like seeing you this weekend at power stop you're so nice to everybody so courteous to everybody like power stop literally i've never seen you were like a paul mccartney you're like a beetle really and you're so nice to everybody yeah i think sometimes i don't notice it unless i start to get like super uncomfortable you know i don't know But we had a great time, dude.

Great time.

Thank you for everything.

It was a blast.

Oh, thank you guys, dude.

One of the reasons I went was because you guys were going to be there.

I knew it was going to be some of y'all's first event.

What did you think about the UFC?

Because it was your first UFC as well, well, right?

Yeah, it was our first UFC.

UFC was fun.

It was just, it was a blast.

But what time did y'all show up?

We got there at seven.

So we were there for the main event.

It was really cool to see.

I didn't make a little parlay before we got there and I did Louise pretty quickly.

I won the first one with that

gray-haired gentleman.

I think it was like Danish or something.

Dariush.

Yes.

But then I took Cara France.

I loved his vibe at the weigh-ins, and that was a tough one.

Because when he was doing the weigh-ins with the Hakka thing, like he was doing, I said, this guy's the man.

I got to take this.

And his brother was right behind us, too.

And he lost.

He was getting super into it there was some crazy fights dude i saw that one fight it was van versus he did win though because i remember someone at the way and came up to me before the day before and was like you got to bet van tomorrow you got to bet van tomorrow and i forgot to as soon as he won i was like oh shit he came out of the blue was like just hyping van up yeah it was roy voll versus van dude i'd never seen this They took, there were times where they knocked each other out and then hit him again so quick that he knocked him back in, dude.

I'd never seen that in my life.

I saw it.

I swear to God, I saw it two times in this match.

A guy knocked a guy out and and then knocked him right back in.

I was like, he's,

I was like, he's out.

It's like, oh, sis.

He came right back.

I mean, the guys are insane.

They're, they're sickos.

And it's so, it's cool to see like how like much respect they have for each other too.

Like after they've done fighting, it's it's nuts.

And it's crazy to see the whole arena is just huge fight fans.

And I felt kind of weird because I didn't really know anything.

Everyone's talking about the strategy of everything, different moves, what they should do.

Who do you like?

And I'm just like, guys, this is my first time.

I've, I don't even, I don't even know who's fighting.

Yeah.

But it was fun to see.

I've always wanted to go to one.

It was very cool to see.

I will continue.

Definitely continue watching the big ones.

The big ones are fun.

Yeah.

And I think you can get into it.

I think one thing that I, that helped me get into it, because

UFC was scary to me at first, right?

I never grew up being able to really like defend for myself or whatever type shit.

So I think just fighting in general, I mean, I've been in some fights, but I wouldn't say I was doing great in them.

Yeah.

You know,

I've only been in one, too.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Not a lot.

I'm not a fighter.

Oh, when I get really old, I'm fighting, motherfuckers.

The second I go to a senior care center or whatever i'm first dude i get in that comes up to me getting loud or whatever even if he's lost and he's just loud because he can't hear him dog done he's going down bro done that's it for him he's had a long he's had a long life done but that's gonna let everybody know what everybody else in there henry whoever else lives in that bitch that i'm there you think you're gonna go to a senior care facility when you're older yeah i might go when i'm younger dude caleb lives at a senior center he did 50 he was 50 and over i believe yeah he lived in a 50 and over building which is good for him because he likes, I mean, he likes to hang when he's home.

So there's nothing else you could do, really.

No, relax, learn a new game.

Yeah.

I think he had one room that he called his office.

And then he would, but he was right on the beach too.

So it was a nice location.

You could walk around, literally on the beach.

So walk around there.

Nice.

We go out to the pool over there, and it's a lot of like

sun-dried Hebrews kind of with like a neck, neck jewelry and Italians and Greeks with neck jewelry.

That's pretty much it.

Just Hebrews and Italian.

Like in his area, in that area of Florida, Delray Beach.

I call it the Sixth Borough.

It's basically all New York.

It's all new New Yorkers.

And it's so fun.

Like, you get old Italian guys from Brooklyn there.

I'll be at the bar with them and I'll just be like, where are you from?

You think you look kind of like Nebraska?

Like you're from Nebraska or something.

They get so married.

Like, what are you kidding me?

Benson, but boring Rays, they freak out.

It's one of my favorite things to do.

They're just the best.

They're such funny people.

I love them.

They're such ridiculous human beings.

Oh, yeah.

Being down there is a good time, man.

That's a beautiful air.

It gets so hot, though, this time of year.

I love the water, man.

There's something special about just being in the water.

I'm such a fan of it.

Oh, yeah.

Well, I think that a lot of people believe that life started right out of the water.

It kind of makes sense.

We kind of seem like something the ocean left.

I don't know.

Yeah, I wonder if God, like, because you have to have water to make anything.

Dude, look at probably

most recipes use water.

Everything.

So for sure, like

God made us with water.

So obviously, yeah.

Yeah, I think I remember for some reason, remember the movie War of the Worlds that came out like 20 years ago?

Tom Cruise, alien movie, ruined my life.

I was terrified the hell out of me.

It was an alien attack movie.

But at the end, they find out that they started saying how everything starts in water.

And water, I think, well, that was signs, actually.

And water is

like how all this started.

Like how they fought the aliens.

But it's also in signs because the signs, they're also, the aliens are anti-water as well.

Oh, yeah.

So I'm maybe mixing up my alien movies.

Well, remember, like a few months ago, they're like, aliens are in the water.

Now nobody even gives a shit.

People are just out there fighting.

I was throwing it up.

You're doing lazy rivers and shit.

I was like, I was looking the other day.

Some kids are in a lazy river.

We got to go to a lazy river.

We've been talking about that.

What are you talking about?

They're fucking...

Oh, man.

We got to do that.

There's them cyborgs in the deep end homie yeah someone i did see the other day i saw a tweet about the jersey drones too

what happened to that god dude that was what what happened to that i think that was just a new papa john's delivery swarm or whatever that was just jersey mics trying a new fucking for three weeks we showed the lights going on in new jersey i knew people that saw him like really yeah

i'm pretty one of my buddies his um frat brother from college is a cop in Tom's River, New Jersey.

And he was like texting them like, I'm seeing these things.

They're here.

Did the kid, well, why don't you fucking shoot at him or something?

You're a fucking cop.

He's just texting his buddies.

You're doing the same thing we're doing.

I don't know if you can go straight at him.

What do you mean, you're who's gonna see?

I saw somebody attack it.

What are you gonna say?

The Toms River Police Department gonna take out the challenge drones, yeah, dude.

All he does is Tom's River PD, bro.

They hit dinger.

There's like probably five guys on the source on the porcelain, dude.

Whatever.

We cheer for those little bastards when they won the World Series.

Yeah, their World Series, Little League World Series home.

Hit a ball at one of those drones john frazier yeah they can

you think at the very least they could just hit a freaking flyball and take out a couple drones well especially like the fact that there's if it's aliens or whatever that they're spying on new jersey i'm like dude at yes get some jersey but get like a charcuterie of america get some other places as well she just don't think that everybody is um you know yeah you know uh has a side hustle doing trading cards or whatever that's that that is very new jersey it's such it's such a creepy thing though thinking about like aliens and if that exists.

You know, it's actually a very weird thing to me, too.

What's your take on like supernatural stuff?

Supernatural?

Like, what do you mean?

Like, one of my, one of my, no, so one of my best friends is Scott, and we call him Sal.

I don't know why we call him Sal.

We call him Sal.

Anyway, he was here actually in Nashville on a bachelor party like three years ago.

And true, like, he's a normal person.

He's one of my best friends.

Truly, to this day, claims that like they came home from the bar one night.

He was asleep and there was like some sort of entity like over him looking at him.

And he was like, I remember he came home the next day and like we got launched he was saying telling us like this thing is real we saw it multiple times and it's almost like freeing or like feels good because i know that stuff exists and now i know like god is real is what he said it was and he's completely normal guy did he stands by it wow did he bring a chick home maybe it was he just brought a tall chick home with him

he said it was tall he did say it was a tall

but some of that shit's super scary man like i recently had uh i was in los angeles probably less than a year ago and you know like staying we rented a house in the hills.

And the hills for me is very scary.

I don't like the hills.

It's very like, I'm secluded and away from everything.

Just staying there in general freaks me out.

And I was there with one of my producers and he was lining at like 1 a.m.

And I was landing, I landed at like six.

And I went to this house.

I didn't realize we booked it so far into the hills.

It was almost under the Hollywood sign.

Oh, yeah.

And it was, we got there.

And I was like, this place is fucking.

terrifying.

Look, nothing like the pictures.

It was a nice house, but it was like almost like 70s themed.

Like the pool wasn't even hot.

It was cold.

And then I was like, like vince neil died here or whatever like he's alive he's there still but that that's what ruined like charles manson all that ruined the hills for me it freaks me out so i'm in there i'm sitting there in my bed just literally in a pretzel like this freaked out and i kid you not i hear the loudest boom out of the blue don't know what it is had no idea what it was it wasn't those cost code dudes it was it

AJ?

Yeah.

It was.

It was big AJ.

It was big, big AJ.

And the next thing I know, the Rizzler's there.

That guy who, like, dude, the crazy part is the Rizzle doesn't even fucking know Big AJ.

The whole thing's unreal.

Yeah, so many people think that he's Big AJ's child.

He's just like a fifth grader or something or fourth.

He had a hell back, allegedly.

And then they're like kind of this Jewish powerlifting family.

I actually saw you had the Rizzle at one of your shows recently.

He was in the audience and he came up on stage, very nice guy.

But also, dude, he fucking, he was drinking soda at like almost 10 p.m.

I'm like, yeah, I saw you saying that at Craigs, but then on Danny McBride's episode.

Yeah.

It's like, I was like, what time's your bedtime?

And he's like, you know, he gave me one of those.

Whenever he gets tired, it's when the Rizzler goes to sleep.

He said, big money don't sleep.

I was like, what?

How much money do you think the Rizzler has?

It's got to be multiple millions, I think, right?

You think so?

He's like the most famous person on the internet.

That's a great point.

And he does like a children.

Is he working in a children's market?

He's kind of edging into adult marketing, though.

I wonder if kids even like are fans of him.

I think it's more of adults just enamored with him.

He's so gorgeous.

He's unbelievable.

He's definitely, I like that he's just himself, right?

Yeah.

Yeah.

He got up on stage the other night and answered a couple of questions for us.

I think I've been learning to, I've been seeing videos of him.

It seems like he's getting more confident in like speaking and stuff, which is nice because he's literally just a nine-year-old kid.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That's what I was hoping.

I was like, well, let's get him up here and at least get a little bit of practice in front of a random night.

And

yeah, it was great, man.

That was great to see him.

Anyway, hear this boom.

I don't even investigate.

I'm terrified.

I'm going to meet a few buddies at Barney's Beanery.

And I'm like, you know what?

I'm just going to go.

I'm not coming back home till my producer lands at 1 a.m.

So I got to occupy myself until he lands.

It says, no way, I'm going back there alone.

So I go to the, I'm at Barney's Beanery for like seven hours because I refuse to go home.

Finally, he picks me up.

We go in the house.

I go to bed.

I close the door.

It was the mirror on the back of the door.

Just, that's when I realized what it was, just fell by itself.

It was on like six screws, just fell by itself.

And broke.

No, it didn't break.

No idea why.

It just, I was literally sitting in the bed.

It was where that TV is.

Just fell out of blue.

And I was like, this is

not for me.

Too much up there.

Yeah.

I'm not into not into the supernatural stuff.

There's been, I'm trying to think of other times in my house.

Oh, well, that's not that super.

I mean, that's pretty supernatural, but that's also just bad drywall, probably.

I mean, that could be a mix of things, right?

I think my house is haunted, I think.

Well, yeah, but that's

do you?

Yeah, actually, so my buddy claims he did this in like the third grade, my friend Frank.

I don't know if it's him or not, or like my parents told him to tell me this to ease my mind.

Oh, yeah.

But literally in my attic, I'm pretty sure there's something carved that says like darkness is here

on the wall, which I don't, I don't like.

I've always wondered if someone's getting it gotten into my attic.

Oh, dude, I went into my attic, dude.

Yeah, I went into my attic not long ago and was like, who's up here?

Like, because first of all, the way they have an attic set up, it's the scariest thing ever, dude.

Because first of all, you have to find a square on the ceiling of your regular home, right?

And it has a string hanging out of it.

So obviously your attic is go, it's that time of the month in your attic, attic, right?

Always.

You want to hear a bad thing about my attic too?

The door to get into it is in my room, my childhood bedroom.

So it's right there.

Yeah, that's the way to get to the attic.

And on top of that, we growing up, we used to be a big Halloween family.

So we would go all out for Halloween.

There's like a fucking old witch up there.

We still have this witch, like a full-sized witch.

She's green.

She's got a huge snaz.

So every time I walk up there, she's just staring at me.

They're all, it's all up there.

All my jerseys that I had when I was a kid.

My witch.

It's a scary place.

Well, it's a very scary setup because first of all, you have to find that place.

And if if it's in your childhood room and and that means just like there's this open portal to like scary pieces of the holidays that we keep in our attic right exactly so first of all you have to find that cable thing you pull on it right or sometimes there's even like a stick that's in a closet this little hook you have to find that

It's an insane thing.

And it's, they built the whole contraption.

It's literally like

a pulp, like the earliest Pilates thing that they ever made.

It's from like the 1700s.

You can hear the polio leg.

It's just like one big polio leg kind of folds out of there.

It's the same things that they used to use to make like forest gumps, like leg

braces.

Yeah, his leg braces.

It's the same part of that makes a ladder that comes down.

Maya.

And you have to climb up there.

And then you get up there.

All the holiday.

It's like there's a snowman that's looking at you, right?

There are

there's a vio, yeah, like there's Halloween.

It's just all the holidays are sitting right there waiting for you.

It's an interesting thought that all the holidays are right there.

It's scary.

And I have turkey and they all live up there when you're not.

And it's like they all stopped and there's just like, and I'm like, who's up here?

And you just hear bells will be ringing.

You're like, that sounds kind of nice.

I'm like, okay, just making sure everybody's getting along up here.

Everybody's good.

It's almost your time.

And that's big.

They're up three months in a row.

Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas.

Bing, bang, boom.

So there's nine months of.

Nothing.

Nine months of sleep.

No, but then you have the Easter rabbit.

He's like, I'm hiding eggs.

They're all all just up there having a good time.

Your headlink is there on the forward.

It takes long.

It's a big thing.

That's a fun idea to think about.

While the holidays are hanging out.

Oh, they're all just hanging out up there in your attic, dude.

And then there's Black History Month.

They're like, what's up, motherfuckers?

Santa wedding hose it.

You're like, okay, this is getting

a little turnt, but hey, have a good time, guys.

As long as it's getting turnt.

As long as they're having fun.

Their body, their choice.

That's it.

Yeah.

When it comes to like, yeah, Santa, Frankenstein, whoever, your body, your choice.

Totally.

And dude, I'm telling you, I have a witch up there.

There's a legitimate green witch.

It's a life-size witch.

Of course.

It's horrifying.

I haven't been up there.

And my heart's almost beating a little bit thinking about the attic.

The attic's a scary thing.

The attic is so scary.

I had to go up the other day in my house and I was like, how do I even, where is the attic?

And first, you're like, oh, shit, that's where it is.

Because every now and then I'll hear something up there.

And I'm like, And for the first two months, I didn't even care.

I'm like, if the guy's up there, however, he's coming in and out.

He's obviously passive.

I've been hearing it for two months.

He's not trying to attack or whatever, unless he's up there plotting, but he would be louder.

You know, he would have a chalkboard going.

I would hear something.

You know, I would hear like, you know, him watching John Gruden YouTubes or something.

I would hear something.

That would be nice.

I would hear some strategy, though.

You know, Spider-Two Ibnana just in the back of your ear.

But yeah, it's an interesting thing, man.

I don't know how I feel about all the supernatural stuff.

I hope ghosts aren't real, but then I hope they are.

Because if they are, that means God's real.

Yeah.

Dude, it's so bright outside.

Have you been outside?

It's impossibly bright.

It's like I want to leave my eyes inside.

But then I'm just outside without my eyes.

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Well, also, when you, I think there's two ways to, or like, I don't know if there's two ways to look at it.

I just like saying that once in a while, but

think believing in God is a very, it's extraterrestrial in a certain way, right?

Believing in like that we've come from something, right?

Like

not that God's alien, but that you're believing in something supernatural.

So to believe that

supernatural powers could only

go in the scope of what you want them.

You know what I'm saying?

Like sometimes we like to think of things only as we want to think of them.

But I think if you're going to believe in supernatural, then a lot of things would be possible.

Yeah, I think kind of goes hand in hand.

Because, like, that's just one thing I always say.

Like, I don't even, I don't know anything about how the universe was created, but even the Big Bang Theory, it wasn't that few like particles or chemicals coming together and exploding.

Yeah.

Like, how did those chemicals get there?

How did those particles get there in the first place?

It was the first meth lab, really.

Yeah.

Yeah.

There was the first thought of us, dude.

Like, how did those first things come together, though?

It's a crazy thought to think about.

Yeah.

Like, when did it start?

No one will know.

It's crazy.

It's definitely interesting.

And then they allow us to show up and mill around us, loiter through life, just like traveling by, having some bruschetta, you know what I'm saying?

Watching the genocide and then, you know, trying to find a nice,

and then the like commercials during the genocide.

It's like nothing goes with this mass slaughter like a

Pinot Noir, you know?

You know, you're like, God, what has happened to us?

Very sad times in a lot of ways.

But,

but yeah, man,

but you still have to live your life, right?

And it's interesting, but then you're like, Is Satan just amongst us?

Like, we treat each other human beings,

we're all instead of just being like, Hey, look how crazy it is, we're all living together on this magical Christmas ornament of the Lord that got hung in outer space.

We're here shooting each other.

Like, imagine if you saw a Christmas tree and you see a beautiful ornament, it's the most beautiful ornament there is, and you go and you look really close, right?

Like, you zoom in, like you do

like a Google Maps for a Christmas ornament, the most beautiful one that exists.

It's like a diamond in the sky.

And you look at it and you're like, holy shit, they are gunning each other down on this fucking thing.

Stop that.

You're like, why?

This is supposed to be an ornament.

It's supposed to be.

There's no bad things that happen in snow globes.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And this is it.

This is the best snow globe.

And it's the best.

I feel like we can do better in this snow globe, man.

I really believe that.

Let's talk about,

I do want to, one thing that really struck me over the weekend man besides your kindness and sincerity to everyone um

was the hash brown you mentioned at the win oh buddy that was something we came down for breakfast saturday morning yeah and we had a hash brown down there at a restaurant it was called tableau i think it is the restaurant tableau

see if you can bring up a photo of the hash brown it was like a little baby hash brown too it wasn't big at all but it was thick and i got a just i've been doing this a lot when i'm traveling i've just been waking up going to like a diner hotel bar and just getting two eggs sunny side up toast bacon easy boom this came with a hash brown and that was a damn good hash brown it was it was this big it wasn't it wasn't even large but it was so creamy yeah it was perfect it was fantastic that's one of my favorite things is a nice uh just breakfast hash brown as well yeah the inside tasted like it had kind of almost been cooked in a sauna in a way it was very perfect

it had a light

what was the spice in it yeah bring it up let's get that let's see that yeah i don't even know if it's it's like by itself.

I think it's on the menu by itself.

It may just be coming with the.

I think that was the menu.

Let's go down.

Yeah, because I just got the,

it was three eggs, any kind, I think it was.

Tableau breakfast is what I got.

They don't even give it.

Yeah, okay, that's what it is.

Tableau potato.

Ooh, the tableau potato.

That must be what they call it.

They don't even call it a hash brown because it's too classy to be a hash brown.

It's just a tableau potato.

And boy, was that a hash brown.

It was a hash brown.

There they are.

Is that it?

Yeah.

it was i couldn't it was definitely man and it had a i don't know if it had a rosemary a sight slight chive just like a chive had wandered through and just left a few footprints nothing heavy yeah that i mean that thing was classy i like that place to stay at it was that that's i think clearly i could say the best hotel in vegas you think so the win and the encore are both awesome i love both i mean i i'm not it's not that i really need much to like a hotel yeah like i like the resorts world there resorts world is great resorts world is like its own little city they got everything in there they got great restaurants casino bar, concert venue.

But, um, I'm not, I've been coming around on Vegas, kind of.

I think it's, it's okay.

I used to hate it.

Now I'm coming around on it.

Yeah.

Oh, I mean, I think it's, you know, if you can, if, if, if, if, if the right things happen and it's if you can use it to for good, you know, then

the biggest mistake people think about Vegas is they think it's like here where you could just go on Broadway and there's 100 bars and you could just walk into one and say, oh, I don't like this one.

I'm going to walk into the next one.

Vegas, it's so spread out.

The hotels are, you think the strip, you think everything is next to each other it's so goddamn spread out like me my buddies did a bachelor party there two years ago and i was the best man so i had to run it you know when they say like nashville ain't ready vegas ain't ready vegas could not have been any more prepared they knew what they were doing they kicked our ass it was it was it's tough it's tough to do this whole plan especially when you're roaming around with 15 guys that's impossible yeah like thank you to alex and drew they let me bring the chainsman they let me bring 15 Italian men to one of their shows.

And that was the highlight of the weekend.

But you can't bring 15 guys anywhere.

You haven't, I don't seen that kind of troop support since World War II.

I know.

It was, it was, and the Italians are on the losing side of that too.

It was, it was a bad loss.

It was a bad weekend.

But that was the highlight of the weekend.

They did let us bring 15 dudes.

Very kind.

That's kindred activity right there.

I mean, that's one of the worst asks you could possibly ask somebody.

Hey, do you mind if me, who we're not even that close, come and bring 15 guys and bring 15 dudes?

That's zero boobs and just 15 penises.

Oh, man.

That's like a fucking.

It's not even like we said, oh, it's a 15 of us.

We're bringing like five chicks with us.

It's just 15 guys.

Yeah.

Oh, it's just a Dago invasion or whatever.

Yeah.

Yeah, exactly.

We stormed the beaches.

Yeah, just like, yeah.

Like, just like storming the beaches of a fucking Fuka de Beppa, you know?

That's what it is, dude.

That's the Dago invasion.

Can you say Dago or not?

It's bad.

I mean, we can believe that.

No, say Dago.

I'm not going to say Dago.

I'm

75% Italian.

I'm giving you Dago.

You are?

Yeah.

You got Dago, Wap, Guinea.

What's that one other one?

Dago Guinea.

Wap it like it's hot.

Have you seen that video?

No.

Is that an Italian video?

It's somebody who watched an Italian person accidentally burned their hands on a cast one of these.

Oh, Guido's a huge one.

That's the classic.

Oh, yeah.

Guido's are.

Guido's not even real.

Guido's what?

I like Georgie Short 2009.

That was when Guido came in.

But Guido, Wap, Dago, Guinea.

Yeah.

You have it.

I'm giving you the D-words.

Okay.

Dude, I was at a show the other night.

Some black guy gave me an N-word card.

Oh, really?

Yeah.

It had my name on it and everything.

He'd filled it out for me.

It was cool, but I'm like, dude,

where do you want me to use this?

I mean, yeah, maybe at a Bucky's or something, but like, I don't think you can just use this anywhere.

So I don't know.

I saved it.

I'm going to show it to somebody and see what they thought.

But I'm not just going to make any choices.

I'm going to talk to my neighbors about it.

I love that.

Yeah.

That's something.

I think you got to get like, you know, when you know when you get a new apartment or something and they got to get a, they call for references, you got to get at least five references.

Oh, yeah, definitely dude.

You can't be one guy.

No, I'm going to have to get Druski to sign the back of it or something.

Sign

somebody.

Dude, I do want to talk about this.

I was thinking about was

the perfect peanut butter and jelly.

Ooh.

I was thinking about that.

I will say I don't have too much experience in the peanut butter and jelly game.

I do love uncrustables.

Not really.

You're like uncrustable.

Honestly, this may sound crazy.

I do consider peanut butter and jelly sweet.

Like, I'm more of a savory guy.

I really am.

I don't, like I was saying, I've just been getting into the gems.

I have never, was never really the biggest peanut butter and jelly guy.

Like, going, like, maybe brought it to lunch at school a few times.

My big lunch growing up was like ham and cheese.

I'm actually dying for a good, just classic ham and cheese sandwich.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Ham and cheese, a little mustard.

Or roast beef.

I used to do roast beef a lot, but then by like Wednesday, it was gray.

So you'd get roast beef for the week.

Monday, fantastic.

And then it just dwindles as the day goes by.

Roast beef gives up fast, you know?

I love roast beef, though.

It's one of my favorite things.

Me and my dad sometimes will just go to our local deli and get like a pound of roast beef and bread and just make our own sandwiches and a ball of fresh mozzarella.

Fantastic.

Fresh mozzarella, salt, pepper, mayo.

Boom.

Maybe some hot peppers if I'm feeling spicy.

God, dude.

Yeah.

I think I just, I want to be, I want to like, sometimes I

just got to get more engaged with my life.

It's like, you know, I eat only two things every day.

Mostly.

You were telling us down at the other day.

What was it again?

I eat a smoothie that's pretty good.

And then I also do a

quesadilla, almond flour quesadillas.

There's these almond flour quesadillas that I really like.

It's just like simple ingredients, nothing.

And then cheese on there.

It's that fake cheese, like the Mexican shredded cheese or something, you know?

And it's not, it's like plywood or something.

It's not even real cheese or whatever, you know.

I mean, a lot of Mexican people will even use it as a construction, as like a, um, some sort of a base and a construction.

Yeah, exactly.

Like it's, yeah, it's definitely like, it's a polymer or whatever it's called, you know?

Anyway, I'll put that, and then I'll have some ground beef I cooked up, and then another layer of cheese, a little bit of sea salt, another almond quesadilla quesadilla thing.

Nice.

I hope that becomes like the McConaughey sandwich.

Remember that clip that went crazy a few months ago?

McConaughey was on Two Bears, I think, talking about how he makes a tuna salad, and it just went crazy.

Everyone was, everyone was making the McConaughey tuna salad.

God, yeah.

I haven't, yeah,

I just want to up my game and get some better recipes.

Maybe I would like to, maybe I'll get a wife that likes to cook or a girlfriend that really likes to cook and can take me down some different roads like that.

You know, like a motherly type of girlfriend that's, you know, just like who likes to cook and watch and our whole family can eat together or whatever um

but

oh peanut butter and jelly this is what my grandmother used to do this and she didn't like me but i do remember she made this for me a couple times i think she made that she would take a piece of bread and i like wheat bread if i ever have to have peanut butter and jelly because white bread just got something happened to it the basic white bread bunny bread or whatever

it just like It's better when you're younger, I think.

I've never done the wheat on peanut butter and jelly.

I think I feel like if you're going for PB PBJ, you should just go for the white because wheat's supposed to be healthier for you, right?

It's just brown white bread.

Yeah, I remember some of the healthy kids in school used to have the wheat bread, and I was like, These fucking meat.

Well, my mom was crazy like that.

My mom would like never talk to us, but then make us eat.

Like, you know, she would be like, oh, we're having like a lamb tonight.

Like, my mom was very bizarre.

She'd be like, yeah, she would have no communication with us, but then be like, but tonight we're completely poor.

She'd be like, but tonight we're going to have.

Fagois.

And we'd all hope she'd be like, emotional connection, right?

But it was always like French onion soup.

So it was just every time you're like, ah.

And it was like once a month she would do that.

She'd come home from work like once a month.

And we'd have a babysitter who was either deceased or like couldn't even, we had this one lady that I couldn't even talk with.

I think she'd been in like a, I don't know if she had a stroke, right?

We met her or whatever.

She stayed with us for two weeks.

And I think she had a stroke like the day she got to us.

And for two weeks, we had no clue.

It was just like playing charades with this like sweet older black lady.

We're like, okay.

Do you know how old you were for that?

I have no idea.

I was probably fucking eight or whatever.

Anyway, but my mom, yeah, that's how she was.

She would like not talk to us, but then she would like get us together and she'd be like, and we'd have all these issues or like desperate need for affection.

She'd be like, but tonight,

split pea soup with ham.

And we'd be like, nice.

Yeah.

He's like using the food to bod.

My parents have done that too.

It was so exciting, dude.

Oh, for sure.

I'm surprised that Shers doesn't have some spare Gorgonzola in the pocket, you know?

Yeah, my parents used to fucking supersize me.

They would would give me the supersized McDonald's, and I was like,

Yeah, that's crazy.

I know it's bad.

I don't want to make them sound like bad parents.

They're beautiful people, but when I was a child, I was having supersized McDonald's bad.

You were the fucking first Rizzler then.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Dude, I saw me that he had, he had two Jimmy Johns.

He's like, I don't even think I'm going to eat one of these.

I was like, all right, you can do whatever.

You can afford it.

You can't do one, but still.

But my grandmother would make,

she would put butter on one piece,

jelly on top of that, and then peanut butter on the other piece.

So, one piece had butter, just spread butter base, and then uh jelly.

And that was for some reason so good.

Beautiful.

It's already good.

And then you add in some butter, and we, butter's welcome to any party.

Yeah, and it was like, you know, it was like normal, real salted butter, like regular ass butter.

Oh, that sounds so good.

Not like that stuff.

It's like, I can't believe it's not.

Yeah, the margarine.

Yeah.

Because even that's what I've been saying.

Like when I've been having the jam at these restaurants, I've been doing butter down first and then the jelly and it's it's it's good butter's just I wish butter was zero calories that would make my life a lot easier butter I always say if I could do a zero calorie food it would be rice if I could do make rice zero calories I wouldn't be pretty hot is it high calorie as rice it's not high calories like it's supposed to be good for you but I could just it's not like it's horrible for you but I could like eat chicken and rice every meal if I could I love chicken and rice yeah and then if it's just grilled chicken and the rice

I think I think people consider rice remotely healthy though because everyone's all these skinny people in the city are eating grain bowls and stuff.

That's a good point.

It says right here, while a cup of cooked long grain white rice has around 205 calories, a cup of cooked white rice typically contains around 205 to 242 calories.

Yeah.

Brown rice doesn't really have that much difference.

No, and people think it's so much healthier.

That's a little life hack I did with Chipotle.

I asked them for both rices, and then you get like double the amount of rice.

And they do that?

Yeah.

Wow.

That's one thing I popped in my brain one day.

That's real good.

I love Basmati rice, too.

They just said that.

There's this place in New York, Halal Gas.

You ever had that?

It's actually nation-wide now.

I bet there's one here.

Basmati, I'm going to be up there next week.

Yeah.

What are you doing in New York?

We got some podcasts up there next week.

Cool.

What is it?

Hey, I'll be around.

You will?

Hey, if I want to get dinner in a nice Italian restaurant one night, we should.

Dude, I'd love it.

Monday or Tuesday?

Yeah.

I literally, wait, this Tuesday, this Monday and Tuesday?

Yeah.

She'll be gone.

We have a Sunday in Charlotte.

I'm leaving on Monday.

That makes me sad.

I literally just, actually, Caleb just came and stayed with me and my family for two days in my childhood home, and I brought him to my favorite restaurant and he loved it.

And it's called Halalga?

It's called Luigi's.

Luigi's.

Yeah, yeah.

And it's fantastic.

So it's in New Hyde Park.

It's right on the border of Queens and Long Island.

So it's not too far from the city.

It's probably like an hour, 45 minutes from the city, but it's right on the border of Queens and Long Island.

Yeah, I bought Caleb, bought like nine of my friends, my parents, and Caleb.

We went a few months, a few weeks ago.

It's great.

Oh, we owe them a visit then.

I'd love to go there sometime.

Dude, I went to this place the other day after one of the UFC fights, and I'm kind of named, or after the UFC fights, Joe Rogan invited me to go to dinner, right?

So I'm like, oh, yeah, you know?

So I got to go, and I'm definitely name-dropping, but it was just exciting.

And John Anick and DC Daniel Cormier were there.

No way.

I saw Rogan post a picture of it, actually.

Yeah, yes.

There was a place called Gaetano's.

It was like in Henderson.

Henderson.

I love the name of places not, of Italian places not in New York.

They just name like Gaetanos or Paisons or New York Pizza.

And Dean Thomas.

And the guy Nick, I think was the owner of it.

Dude, they gave me a

they gave me a ravioli.

Yeah.

It was just like a fucking, it was like a shingle from the gods, brother.

Yeah.

Like a shingle fell off a roof of a of a home of one of the gods, a summer home, and just traveled through a cloud of sauce and landed right in my jaw, brother.

Oh, my God.

Dude, you're very good, actually, at talking about food.

Really?

Yeah.

Like the way you were explaining that hash brown, that potato the other day at breakfast, I remember saying, telling you at breakfast, you're good at explaining food.

Really?

Yeah.

Thanks, man.

You're very good at explaining food.

Ravioli is just a nice little piece of cloud heaven.

I like a good lobster ravioli.

That gets me going.

I don't even know what was in this.

That could have been anything.

They could have had ground-up pieces of my sister in there.

I still would have loved it.

It was just so good.

It was so fucking good.

It was so good.

I couldn't even talk right after.

I couldn't even tell the guy how good it was.

I just suddenly, like, I just, you know, I was like my babysitter when I was young, you know, just at the bottom of the stairs, just yelling loud single syllables because blood wasn't going to my brain.

Oh, man.

Oh, it's very stroke victim ravioli.

Did they just bring out stuff?

They brought out a few things.

Well,

Rogan had been there over the years and he loved this place, right?

So he's like, I want to take you to this place.

And that's the Italian in Joe.

Like, I always, I do realize that.

Like, anytime I've been in dinner with him, he's always the one like, no, try that.

Like, that shit never leaves a real Italian dude.

No, that's my favorite.

I love forcing people to eat food that they enjoy.

It's a nice thing.

It's fun to see people react in such a way i love bringing them to places that they normally don't have i love doing it and yeah rugged is italian jersey i believe yeah yeah

actually boston maybe boston i think yeah i think he grew up in boston or yeah i i know he did comedy in boston i'm pretty sure he grew up in bust but yeah like it's just fun just fun like i'm sure his reaction was great to you having that lovely pillow of ravioli but there'd be times like if i'd be at dinner with him i'd be almost like scared you know like didn't know like you know because it's like those guys are like the ufc comedy i mean they're like the dream team probably like the greatest guy since like Brent Musberger and uh you know whoever else that guy uh that uh Jim Valvan whoever like some of or Dick Insberg whoever some of those guys are I don't know Jim Valvano is a basketball coach stud though from from the neighborhood I'm from in queens really yeah corona queens he's from corona queens but uh who the great frick great frick Jimmy V legend there he was but um Talk down to the other great announcers, Vern Lundquist, people love.

I love Sam Rose and he used to do the New York Rangers.

He just retired this year.

He's a legend.

Yeah.

He's fantastic.

What are some other classics?

I love the dude

who does the horse racing.

I can't think of his name.

Larry Colemas.

He's a stud.

He's a stud.

That may be my favorite sports call of all time was American Pharaoh won in the Triple Crown.

Really?

Yeah.

And not even the biggest horse racing person.

It was just very hearing.

Can we hear that?

Yeah, I think he sounds like American Pharaoh is finally the one.

And he does it.

He does it perfectly.

He's from another country.

I think he's from America.

I would guess.

Yeah.

I hope he's all right.

He's awesome.

He's great.

37-year wait is over.

American Pharaoh is finally the one.

Yeah.

American Pharaoh has won the Triple Crown.

Me and a bunch of my buddies were there.

We were like 19 years old.

We all, because we're 10 minutes from Belmont Park.

So we all went.

I have a video of it like on my phone, like a phone video of it that I still have.

It's sick.

But yeah, that was cool.

That was a cool.

That was a cool experience to be at to see the first Triple Crown in 37 years.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, that's pretty incredible, huh?

Yeah, to witness something that's just so rare like that.

Yeah, it's funny.

It's funny too, because two years later, me and my friends also went and there was another horse Justified.

We left before the race even happened, and he did win the triple crown.

So we left before the next one because we already saw American Pharaoh.

Once you see that, you're good.

You don't have to.

And those days are, there's, there's so many freaking people.

It's packed.

We had those Belmont things.

Yeah.

There's so many people.

It was so hot.

So we were like, we got it.

But good night, even to beat the traffic we got to get out here.

It's just so packed.

It's such a packed event.

There's like 100,000 people at the park.

And it's like, it's like a lot of women that like

the new garden hats or whatever.

But now women will come in there with like the full guard, like an actual,

you know a quarter hecticer on their hat or whatever like a UFO on their head or something yeah some brought over here you know growing grapes off the back of her ball cap or whatever and you're like this shit is insane you know it just gets a little too intense or the woman

yeah the lady the hat so big you can't even get near her you're like well who the who is that even see your eyes yeah but the track's fun if you've picked a good day like i like saratoga ever been to saratoga saratoga's awesome that's a real fun place upstate new york i think we have a show in rochester or something oh really that's like i think we're probably four hours next to that.

Rochester is like up by Buffalo.

Oh, yeah.

I've had some good times in Rochester.

I almost got hit by a vehicle out there

walking home.

Yeah.

That's where the Gronkowskis are from.

Are they really?

Rochester birthed the Gronks.

Pretty sure of it.

Wow.

I just saw.

What a beast he is.

Oh, yeah.

I just saw Rob the other day, man.

Yeah, it was so cool.

Interesting.

He's an unbelievable.

I've only been with him the one time we had him on the show recently, and that may have been up there for one of my favorite videos we've ever shot.

That's what Caleb says all the time.

Awesome.

What is Caleb like as a boss?

What is Caleb Press?

It's funny.

It is funny as because like you like, he's one of my best friends, like literally in the world.

So it's kind of odd that he's my boss now.

Sometimes he'll get mad at me every now and then.

Like actually the other day, we landed in LA.

Me and Kelsey landed and we were both like, you know what, let's go to Nobu Malibu for lunch.

Let's take a little ride up the Pacific Coast Highway.

And we went to Nobu Malibu and we were like, how quickly do you think Caleb's going to see this on our story and say, oh,

spending that money, huh?

Like spending that company money.

and then uh posted it and we're like you know what we're gonna do we're gonna pay for this ourselves so when he says something we have this in our back pocket and i i wake up to a dm from him the next day he's like he's like oh can't wait to look at this bill and i was like hey paid for it myself

but we knew it was coming so it's sometimes like that that's the one thing sometimes you that in the six months he's been my boss he uh he's very good at like giving a disappointed like oh i i knew you were going to do this yeah to me yeah oh yeah dude i've I've certainly been like that, I think.

And I mean, you have to.

Yeah, you totally have to.

Like, there's no reason we should be spending 120 bucks per person on lunch.

There's not a reason.

So we paid for it ourselves, but we knew he would say something, which he should.

But it's the way he's very good at like sounding disappointed in me.

And I hate when he's disappointed in me.

Yeah.

But also dinner lunching, it goes back to that issue.

We're talking about that earlier.

When people are dinner lunching,

it's like, what are you doing?

Like, it taps, you know, and it's, it's a blessing, I feel like, to be able to dinner lunch, like, to have dinner at lunch.

Yes, of course, because that, like, no Malbu, that's a dinner meal.

That's not a lunch meal.

Lunch should be a bowl, a bowl from Chipotle.

But, yeah, and we, we did, and he immediately, he immediately got on us.

Not immediately, but that next night.

Yeah, well, it's his job.

If he's the, yeah, if he fucking has to look at the books, he's like, yeah, we're not paying a $400 lunch.

For the record, great boss.

Big fan of your work, Caleb.

Thank you.

Oh, yeah.

I owe that man my life.

I always say that.

Oh, well, yeah, dude.

You always

the best, man.

He really is the best.

he's one of the most entertaining guys there is right there disappointed

that was uh yeah he really is one of the best people in the world another good man lost to drugs bizzlement on this thing

i think that was what like that was what uh antonio brown named the cracker of the year he was very jacked up by that oh i love that yeah i love that's a good i get back on hyped up but he's the best i mean him seeing him even just in person the way he just talks normally he's just so funny oh so entertaining so unbelievable like when i brought him to my house he just kept telling me that He just kept telling me I was unconsciously Italianing him.

He just, he thinks of the most creative ways to communicate.

I mean, it's like he almost makes everything in like this fun puzzle kind of

both of you do.

Like when I was sitting at breakfast the other day with you two, I'm like, what am I doing at this table with these two people?

They're too funny.

He is exceptional.

And he, that's sweet of you to say, man, he is exceptional to be around.

Every time I get around him, I'm like, fuck, I wish I could do whatever.

And truly, I would probably say one of my favorite people to just hang with.

He's such a great hang.

He's the best.

and i think that is i always tell i tell my mom this i tell my friends this i think the best compliment one could get is oh that guy's a good hang and caleb's great one of the best hangs yeah he's the man big fan of his work and i think you also think he's one of the funniest people in the world so yeah he's on my funny middle

job you're getting you guys are you guys are tandem well look you've i was asking you've eaten a lot of ice creams over the years is that true i've actually I have been whipped creaming recently.

I don't know if I should say this to the masses, but in order to hopefully stay in shape, I've been doing whipped cream recently.

In the bowl?

Yeah, I've been putting whipped cream in.

On Sunday conversation, more whipped cream than ice cream?

Recently, I've been doing some whipped cream.

Yeah.

Cause it's just, it's

two tablespoons of whipped cream is 15 calories.

And if I'm doing ice cream, I'm probably banging out like two pints.

And that's like 1,200 calories and so much fat.

It's horrible.

Yeah, it's absurd.

Like if I'm doing a big bowl and it's like two pints of like

Ben and Jerry's, it's a lot of food.

That's a crazy amount of sugar.

And if it's in front front of me, I'm going to eat it.

So I need to put whipped cream in the meal, in the bowl.

Because if I'm sitting there for 45 minutes, I'm going to eat it.

So I've been trying to do whipped cream.

Yeah.

And hopefully it has not ruined the product of the show.

I don't think it has.

I don't think so.

I think that makes sense.

It's like, dude, you can't just be ODing over there.

You can't have so much sugar that your eyes won't open far.

And ice cream.

I've learned eating ice cream.

It's weird.

It's so much food, but it doesn't fill you up.

Like, I'll be hungry right after we're done, too.

And so it's basically just an extra 1,200 calories in the day for like not even feel like, well, what a dinner after.

I'll just eat a dinner.

It's it's a good point.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Well, sugar doesn't really fill you up a lot of times, I feel like, especially, um,

dude, you know what I had the other, the other day, and we actually did do a commercial for them, I think, at one point.

It was these masa chips, M-A-S-A.

Did you get some of those,

Trevin?

Yeah, I liked them.

I liked them too, man.

They're not cooked with seed oils.

It's kind of like just like more of like a tangible chip.

Yeah.

Seed oil-free to tortilla chips.

And at first, I was like, oh, you know, these are, they're kind of like a hearty chip.

But then I had a couple.

I'm like, oh, it kind of fills you up.

It just doesn't feel like this addictive thing where you're just eating like 2,000 chips.

Yeah.

You know, sometimes you open a bag of chips and it's just like every chip, it just has just enough nicotine on it or whatever to get you to the next.

Some stuff just gets you, dude.

Like a French onion dip.

If I have one dip of French onion dip, I'll sit there and eat it.

Really?

Fucking, I love French onion dip.

I would never go near a French onion dip.

Always scared me.

Didn't understand it.

I'm like a Super Bowl party.

Like now I don't even let myself have one because if I have one, I'm in for 100.

It's French Onion Dip gets me big time.

There's some things I still get perverted over food-wise.

And ooh, I don't think we've ever had this packaged French onion dip.

Yeah, I don't, yeah, anything like those like cheese dips, all that kind of stuff for like at parties, those middle things in the middle.

The finger foods.

Yeah, that stuff always kind of creeped me out.

But the sandwiches that had the perfect amount of little mayonnaise, a little triangular, those ham on the white bread.

God, those bitches were good.

This may be just a food podcast now.

We're just talking food all day, and I love it.

It's fine, dude.

Food's the best.

Well, it's never, well, they had those kids, the foodie boys.

Oh, the MD Foodie Boys.

They were legendary.

I just, I'm happy they're popping off enjoying their food, you know?

Yeah, and it's fun to be that age and just have something unique like that happen in your life for everybody.

Like, you know, maybe they're not athletes and maybe this is their, this is their sport.

Yeah, that's cool, too.

On the left there, it says with Baltimore Ravens.

I know they're MD Foodie Boys.

That must be cool doing stuff with the Ravens facility.

Good for them.

Sure.

Oh, yeah.

Chub Perm delivering a speech.

Oh, it's Perm.

That's what that comment says.

Chub Perm, I think.

I don't know their names.

That's cool.

Like getting to go to the Ravens facility and everything.

If you're a Baltimore person.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, that's got to be fun, dude.

Yeah, getting to go to the Ravens facility.

Anything to get you in out of the fentanyl streets over there.

What's up?

There's any safe place to hide over there.

Their mascot should be like the

fentanyl bird or whatever.

And he's just fucking.

Doing the fucking Finny.

Oh, man.

What's one thing that you, like, when you did it, that a cool experience you've had that you said, wow, a child, the child version of me would absolutely go crazy for this right now?

Oh, man.

I think, oh, I got to do the seventh inning stretch at the Cubs game.

Oh, really?

That's awesome.

That's cool.

That was pretty crazy because it happened so fast and it was supposed to be a nice day and then cold weather came in and it was raining and stuff.

So it was kind of like a, you know, and then I was nervous and we'd had a late show the night before and then we just got into town and then the game got postponed by like two hours.

Just a lot of like little things.

Just keep it pushing it back.

Yeah, but then they're like, yeah, they kept pushing it back.

And that was the time I was going to be able to go get a nap in or trying to get to a gym or something to kind of get ready for the show that night.

But

yeah, that was it.

That's cool.

I would have been absolutely terrified doing this.

Like, I don't know how you,

like, do you get nervous for something like that?

Because you're a performer, obviously.

So you still get some, you still freak you out?

Yes.

The two-hour delay would have killed me then.

I would have been terrified.

It was terrifying.

So I'm like, well, what do I do right now?

Then I was like, well, I'll just go home and take a nap now.

And then we got back, barely made it up the stairs to get in there and and sing it.

You realize, first of all, right when you're about to do this, oh, it's not a song.

It's kind of just like a poem.

Oh, take me out to the ball game?

Yeah.

Take me out to the ball game.

A one,

a two,

a three.

Take me out to the ball game.

Oh, this is you singing?

I didn't realize it was you.

Are you trying to do like a Harry Cowey impersonation?

No, I just.

bro.

You can't sing it.

It's not a song, is it?

You know, it's something I think you'll find hilarious.

Can you look up Mets' seventh inning stretch?

Um, Lazy Mary, yeah.

So, this is that.

This, they do this in the Mets games after the, after Take Me Back, after Taking Art to the Vlogging, they played this, which is hilarious.

The whole, the whole crowd just does this.

It's unbelievable.

All right, let's start this.

The little Italian song in the med game every med game.

After the seventh inning strategy.

Every game does it?

And then they do a Billy Joel.

Then they do a Billy Joel sing-along in the eighth inning, I swear to God.

And you can't see, it's just like this little like.

Yeah, it's a little like the Italian emoji.

Yeah, yeah, it's like the Italian hand emoji.

Like,

yeah, just that's a thing everybody does.

Every game.

Every game this happens, and then Billy Joel plays in the eighth inning.

That's hilarious.

It's unbelievable.

Yeah, I guess I should have done it better at the Cubs thing.

I would have tried to just do a Harry Carrier impression.

I feel like that's all it would have been.

But then it's, I, but then you're like, I don't know.

There's so many little things going through your head.

And then you realize, okay, it's on.

And now these people can hear me.

And you're like,

because you can't be like,

take me out to the ball game.

You know what I'm saying?

It's not a song.

It's a slow, song.

You have to almost speak in slow motion.

Like, take me out to the gym.

You can't take me out to the ball game.

It's like, take.

It's weird.

Let me buy you a drink.

t-paint should do that yeah right you can't you know i'm saying if somebody did t-paint like that you're like what do you do you know it makes it a poem t-paint should redo taking after the ball game he's

in the bed like oh yo yo whoa whoa yeah it's just in so i it was just like a lot of learning on the fly and then you're just grateful to be there and you don't want to mess up like you don't want to do something that's like gonna um disrespect the culture you know definitely and that's it that's a big culture club baseball in chicago it's beautiful that's one of the best vibes you could possibly get.

A good day game, Chicago Cubs.

It's fantastic.

It's so awesome.

I used to go.

My grandfather was a big Cubs fan, and he'd watch all the games, you know, and he would smoke, and then he had to get his toes cut off or whatever.

But

we knew all the players, dude.

So you consider yourself a Cubs fan?

I think I was a Cubs fan for most of my life, probably.

I think at heart I'll always be.

You know, I want to see the dove fly, dude.

I want to see, you know, I hope they dig up Sean Dunstan and freaking, you know, find out who killed him or whatever, you know, if he's dead.

I don't know if he is.

Such an old player.

I don't know who Sean Dunstan is.

Oh, yeah.

I think he, yeah, it's just a rumor.

But yeah, no, I love, yeah, growing up with the Cubs, that's all I knew because it was like Midwest.

We would just collect them and the Cincinnati Reds and the St.

Louis Cardinals.

I didn't even know other teams existed, really.

You know, interesting.

Yeah, it's so cool, interesting to think about, too, like baseball.

I always see like people in Nashville.

Everyone's always wearing Braves stuff because I guess the Braves are just like the team of the South.

Yeah.

I wish I never really realized.

I wish they would get a WNBA team here.

I think I would get out and they announced an expansion today.

Not to Nashville.

To Cleveland Detroit and Philadelphia Ooh But literally today they announced that and me and my friends are saying they should bring one to Nashville I think this is the spot to do it Yeah, Nashville would be awesome But yeah, I saw actually today Sophie Cunningham said um she just came out and said I don't think anyone's gonna be excited about Detroit and Cleveland

But those are the three coming.

Yeah, I'm curious to see how much they'll like that.

I don't know.

I would have picked Nashville as one of the places that I would have picked.

I would if I had enough money, I would like to even invest in something like that.

But then that's also kind of crazy.

I could just be, you know, I just could just be too big of a Caitlin Clark, a Leah Boston fan.

So maybe I'll just, maybe it'll be an Indiana Theater fan from afar.

Yeah.

Hey, we're champs this year, baby, New York Liberty.

Y'all are?

Our first championship ever.

One last year.

Oh, last year.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

Stewie in the streets.

Stewie Beast, Dinescu.

That was so sick.

I used to go to Liberty games a lot.

Did you?

Yeah.

I remember there was one time, I don't even think anyone knows this happened.

One time the Liberty in like 2008 or something played a basketball game in the Arthur Ashe tennis stadium, and I went to it.

Wow.

Yeah, because my uncle, my uncle used to work at the post office, and he would like run the group sales for the post office.

So we would always get tickets to everything, like for Ranger games.

I'm a big Ranger hockey fan.

So I love the Rangers.

So that's how we would go to our Ranger games.

But then he got tickets to this.

They played in a tennis, in our tennis arena where they do the U.S.

Open.

Oh, that's so cool.

And I went to that.

I used to go to,

who's, I love Tina Charles.

Tina Charles was awesome.

She was a beast.

And yeah, I used to go to Liberty Games a lot.

But now they used to play at the garden.

Now they don't play at the garden.

They play in the Barclays Center.

And I never, Barclay Center is weird to get to.

Yeah.

It's in Brooklyn.

I've only been to the Barclays Center like five times in my life.

Yeah, it's fun.

People showed up for their parade last year.

Yeah.

I think it's pretty cool.

Yeah, I love watching.

I mean, I'm just such a fever fan.

I've gotten to like some of the other teams, you know.

I like the Valkyries are the expansion team this year.

They're doing well.

The Aces have kind of struggled.

So I think it's an exciting time in the league.

Caitlin Clark's kind of been in and out this year, though.

So she hasn't.

I think

their team is, I think, right at 500 right now.

They have a game tonight.

Yeah, I saw today.

They said the in-league players voted her the ninth best guard guard in the league, which is crazy.

There's some great guards in the league, though, too.

Yeah, the BMA is fun.

Anytime sports are on, I'm more happy.

Yeah, because there's a guy at first.

I'm like, I can't dunk, right?

So I can relate to all these women, most of them.

And if they can, I'm even like, get him out of here.

You know what I'm saying?

Like, so that kind of is a little bit much.

It's fun.

I've always liked it.

I like college basketball.

It's fun to watch.

I like the women's college basketball, too.

I like watching Kayla.

I mean, another thing that I love about her, she's also, whether she's, even while she's playing, she's also kind of coaching.

Like, she's just like on a couple different levels.

She's so competitive.

And I love Aaliyah Boston.

She's like one of my favorite players.

There's so many.

I mean, I could sit here and talk about the Indian fear for a long time, which is a little bit alarming.

It's so odd to think about.

I wonder how Caitlin Clark truly feels.

Like she, she's the whole league.

So it's kind of, I wonder how you look at your mindset works in that.

in that frame of how you think.

Like you're technically bigger than like your coach, the like the owner of your team, everyone.

You're just the number one person in the league.

How that affects your mind when you're trying to play.

It's crazy.

She must do it well.

I believe that she must do it well because otherwise it would be a catastrophe.

And it doesn't seem like it is.

In fact, it seems like she's taken

the correct choice at so many moments where she could have spoken differently or fallen for a lot of traps out there.

Trying to think in any other league, if there's ever been someone that has meant so much to the league, like maybe like Wayne Gretzky in the NHL at the 80s.

I don't really even, I don't really even know.

Maybe can you, maybe Otani right now to the MLB?

It's interesting.

Yeah, who's meant so much?

Maybe Joey Chestnut.

Yes, if we're counting Joey Chestnut, if that is the answer, you know what I'm saying?

Or like he was out last year.

He didn't even do it last year.

Probably no one watched because he's trying to deal with a deal with like a vegan hot dog company until they kicked him out.

Well, it was like live golf.

He went and played.

He went and played in Saudi Arabia.

He took that vegan money.

Yeah, dude.

And first of all, eating pork in a Muslim country, I think, doesn't even go over well.

But he's back to.

Oh, Tiger.

That's speaking of live money.

Tiger is obviously a big one.

Oh, there you go.

This year is extra special.

Also, this will be a Fourth of July episode, man.

Have you ever been to watch him?

No, never in person.

I've never seen him in person.

I would love to.

I mean, he's a legend.

He's a beast.

But it's like going to that, like on Fourth of July, I can never imagine going to Coney Island on the Fourth of July.

It's like an hour away from me.

That just ruins the day for me.

It's like thinking about, oh, have you ever been to the Thanksgiving Day parade?

It's an hour away.

I'm on Long Island.

I'm not going to go ruin my Thanksgiving going to that parade.

I don't know how people do it.

What do you just to see balloons?

What's I think, and the weather is usually, the weather has not been good for that recently, I feel like.

But I think getting to go to, I mean, I guess, what do you go see?

Joe, I mean, I guess maybe the kids want to go see it.

Maybe you've been married long enough.

You're like, oh, we'll go watch this honky eat or whatever, you know?

Like, I don't know, like, when do you do this?

But also to witness a man,

does it still seem like these guys are eating?

I wonder.

Or does it seem like they're just

processing?

You know what I'm saying?

That's what I start to look at.

I'm watching.

I'm like, are they really eating these things?

They're dipping them in water.

They're hiding them and they're fucking, you know.

Yeah, I almost wish they didn't let them do the water dip.

Like right there, we're looking at it.

Joey's eating the bread bread first and then just eating the actual hot dog itself.

I would like it if you had to authentically eat the hot dog.

Yeah, I think they would make it more wholesome.

Just make it feel better, make it feel like it's happening the way it should be.

Because this does feel like it's not scientifically right.

Yeah, and it doesn't make you want to go have a hot dog.

I think if I see sick, you know, like 20 beautiful hot dogs on a platter, I see that, you know, they got a freaking Polynesian girl there, whatever, you know, thick Ruby or whatever they call it.

They all have these crazy names, you know.

They're always always like the uh beef viper or something you know oh yeah everyone has yeah they all have the crazy then there's like huge guys these fat guys and then the fat guys can't eat as good as the poor joey chestnut it's wild yeah they oh there's always the big guy they just wheel him out there and like his nickname is like nougat or whatever you're like oh shit here comes nougat and he's like he's like the world champion of raw shrimp yeah it's always yeah so everyone's the rock champion of something different yeah but uh yeah like oh this guy ate 40 cans of pringles dude and but if he's also in a neck brace, you're like, that kind of seems like it's cheating just based on the shapes of everything.

Oh, man, that's.

He has like a neck brace with like an extended cab on, like, one of those African women.

You know, you're like, what's happening here?

Like, if people are removing their fucking ribs or whatever so they can, like, hide more food.

It's like, what the fuck are we doing?

It's like the, yeah, it's the, what was that, Marilyn Manson story?

Did you ever have that, you ever hear that rumor, obviously?

That he got his ribs removed.

That he got his ribs removed.

That was a classic rumor.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That was all over schools, grade schools.

I'm one of, He's like my white whale to come on the podcast.

Really?

Interesting.

Why?

Marilyn Manson, The Pope.

And I borrowed one of Caleb's white whales.

Fatcho?

Drake?

Caleb's.

You guys haven't had him.

Oh, who?

But he's always wanted him.

Oh.

Should I say it?

Yep.

Beetlejuice.

Yeah, Beetlejuice is number one.

We could say it two more times and he'd show up.

Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice.

There it is.

Yeah.

What's up?

What the fuck is that?

Ah, this Beetlejuice would be so amazing.

Yeah, he's like the black Nate Diaz up here.

He's just like, everything's kind of so crazy with him.

I think we've tried to get him.

It's impossible to get.

You can't get to him.

No.

His cousin, like, oh, we put in some cash with Caleb to try to, you know.

See if he'd come on and even do something together, but he didn't want to do it.

Yeah, I think he said at one point, I think one time Caleb was telling me, like, he lives with his sister and his sister won't let him on.

So you were trying to like get her, like she was like trying to get her a massage, like get her out of the house to then go in and do it.

Like, under her nose.

Imagine he wanders up to your bed.

You're in bed.

He wanders up the side of your bed.

You can't even see him.

You just hear his voice and see his like little afro at the front because of he's so little.

I think literally trying to sneak into his house while his sister wasn't there to get Beetlejuice on the show.

He's only three foot six.

He's like, what are you doing?

He's like, what are you?

What am I doing?

What I'm doing.

He's always like, he's the only person who lives in like present and past and future

at the same time.

He's the voice that we need in America right now.

You know what I'm saying?

He's kind of like the,

I mean, I hate to say this, but he's kind of like the,

like,

kind of the

special Obama, like the mentally, you know, irregular Obama.

He's such a God.

He's such a God.

Speaking of Howard Sterner, Boehler, have you ever come across Artie Lang or met Artie Lang?

He's a stud.

I'm a a big fan of his work.

Oh, yeah.

I haven't heard about him in years.

I would like to get to meet him.

Yeah.

He's one guy that walked by me one time and I was very, very starstruck.

Really?

Yeah.

I've been in the same room with him twice.

I didn't even go.

I'm like, when I'm a fan of somebody, I get too scared to even talk to them.

I don't even say anything to him.

I just let him walk right by me.

But he's such a legend.

I love him.

He has this great movie, Beer League, that came out in like 2006.

He made one of my favorite comedies ever.

And not many people know about it.

It's awesome.

What's it called again?

It's called Beer League.

It's a softball movie.

Him and Ralph Macchio.

And they're just these dudes in Jersey.

They have a softball team.

It's like my dad and and all his friends loved it.

All my friends love it.

It's a hilarious movie.

And yeah, one of my favorites.

I love Artie Lang.

Wow, that's cool.

Have you ever have you ever met Howard Stern?

No.

Yeah, me neither.

No.

I think he's like still in his basement because he stopped doing his show for so long from in person.

He was like living in his basement for like three years because of COVID.

That's wicked.

Yeah, this will be for 4th of July.

I have to pee really quick.

Do you?

I wouldn't mind peeing.

Okay.

Yeah, do you think you had a.

And we just peed.

We both peed.

We did.

Dude, I had freaking.

Penis hurts?

Yeah.

That may not be good.

And you're been doing the touch, touch, touch.

So

feel bad about that a little bit.

Ah.

Whatever, man.

Yeah, how was your, are you ever had a great Fourth of July that you really like?

A great Fourth of July?

I mean, honestly, this is going to sound sappy, but I love just hanging out with my pals.

Like, I got great friends.

I love hanging out with them.

My buddy's, my best friend Johnny's grandpa used to do a sick Fourth of July party every year and he has like really nice housing on the water on the island he would get like a like a professional oyster shucker uh-uh like cigar cutters i think there was a frank sinatra impersonator one year of course i'm pretty sure there was one year there was and he's got his boat going in there just hanging out in the water with the boys yeah that's good enough for me that's a real real good day for me that is a great day yeah some drink right on the water just some drinks like i truly i do think i'm happiest in my life when i'm having a few drinks and just in the water just floating in the water it's the it's the greatest and any fourth of july could do that it's It's nice.

Just pool, friends, family.

Yeah, do you remember when we went to Jimmy John's summer camp last year and we got to just sit in that place.

You guys were having some drinks in that circle.

Oh, dude, we sat in that thing for like five hours.

It was

unbelievable.

That was like, that's my ideal day.

Just sitting in the water is unbelievable.

Like, I'm trying to picture how we could even describe it.

It was like a disc,

it was a disc float.

And then in the net, and the netting is like where we sit.

So it was almost like a aquatic pouch that we were sitting in.

Yes.

And we just laid in there for five hours, like literally all day.

And it was fantastic.

It's like a kiddie pool that'll kind of, that's bigger than that, though.

It's like stronger sides and it'll kind of float around in a lake or something.

That was the fitness.

That was also the first time I jet skied was with you.

I was very scared.

I was very scared.

I'm really worried about jet skiing because if I fall off the jet ski, I'm scared.

I won't be able to get back up.

And then I'm just going to be stuck in the lake, which I don't want to do.

But that was my first time ever jet skiing.

Dang, it's crazy, man.

It's a freeing experience, but they go fast.

They go real fast.

They go way, first of all, way too fast.

Exactly.

And I'm a pussy, like, I can't do stuff that fast.

I'm horrible at that.

Like, I'm really scared of falling off the jet ski.

So, I don't know if I'll do it again this year.

I probably will.

Yeah, I don't think I'm a pussy.

I just don't think that I'm a, I'm not also not a

magician or like a televangelist or whatever it is.

Like, you know, I'm not like a

what are they called?

Like, I'm not like a punt return of those guys.

You were speeding around on that thing.

Well, yeah.

You were making moves.

You were hustling.

You were on the other end of the lake before I even moved.

you were buzzing it gets going you were in minnesota we started in wisconsin

definitely dude i was crossing state lines on that thing really it was impressive you could hear the walleye getting nervous brother um

yeah i'm trying to think of a good oh dude i remember this fourth of july when i was a kid so this fourth of july i had went to my friend

His parents took me to their, they had a beach.

They had like rented a place in Orange Beach or something down there in Alabama.

and it was like if you grew up in the south like if you went to florida or alabama like orange beach any of those places like

uh panama city if you went to one of those places that was like going to the beach dude it was like very nice so anyway i went and they had blueberries i'd never had blueberries i'd never seen blueberries right so i was probably

i'm probably 13 years old right i'd seen like blueberry muffin But I didn't know you could just have blueberries like by themselves, like freelance, like just like a little square, like a small rectangle thing of just completely naked blueberries.

Independent blueberries, yeah.

Yes,

I got you.

Independent blueberries.

And I'd never, and I tried a couple of them and I was like, oh my God, they're so good.

So I ate probably two of these little cage fulls of blueberries, right?

So later, I am,

I was like, I'll just sleep out on the balcony, right?

Because I didn't want to sleep inside because there was a lot of people standing over.

They had like family friends and stuff.

And I started getting like,

I don't even know how to say it, like pretty much like diarrhea diarrhea or something.

Blue diarrhea.

I mean, I got like my stomach had never had this before.

And so it was like, it loved it, but it also, it had way too much.

I had probably, I bet I probably had 440 blueberries.

So, dude, I was in, I ended up just diring off this balcony, like at a side angle, because it was just flying out of my body.

Off the balcony.

Yeah, just misting off this balcony, dude.

I, there was nothing else I could do.

And I had to wash my legs with like a towel and a thing of water.

And like, it was horrible, dude.

Are you, can you eat blueberries now or that did that kill blueberries for you no i mean it took me a while to get back you know to get back around to them but um

you know it was kind of like uh

you know yeah at some point i gave him a second chance but that was like one of the craziest things that were happening i remember was on fourth of july because i remember that some of them had been used to make like the fourth the the cake the fourth of july cake they'd been used for the stars on the like cake on the yes when people do that yeah absolutely so interesting thing yeah blueberries i don't know how my how i feel about them but fourth of july great day it still made me nervous dude i remember it was happening so fast i had to like

kind of hold i was laying on my side and the balcony rails were going up up and down you know what i'm saying yeah i had to like hold on to one of the rails with both of my hands dude and you had to like stick your ass through one of the holes yeah or like try you had to just get it close it was horrible oh feels so bad and there was a sec like a night security guy down there or whatever like every now and then his flashlight would shine up

what are you shining your flashlight up here?

Like a bunch of, like, like you're getting attacked by like a big shit bat or whatever.

What a bad day for him.

You can make him deport himself.

Oh, dude.

He was very old.

I bet he'd even notice.

Yeah, especially if, I mean, if you're a security guard in Panama City Beach, you've seen worse.

And it was like 300 feet of distance between me and him.

So

if anything, he was getting like a...

like a dusting, like something you put on French toast, you know?

That's the worst, man.

I hate having a poop.

Oh.

So annoying.

Well, I thought the other day, what if we didn't have to poop?

Like, I know it's like a side effect of being alive or whatever,

but imagine if we didn't, you could eat as much as you want, or if it, if it never left your body, you could only have a couple things in your whole life because it would build up too much.

Ooh, and carry around the whole life.

I wouldn't, yeah, I'd rather poop.

I would need to eat.

I need to have all of that.

But just so much anxiety, like when you're out at a restaurant or something, yeah, I got to do this.

Oh, yeah.

Well, it's so scary.

Like,

my body usually lets me know if I have to poop when I'm at home.

Oh, really?

I think so.

Nice.

Like, I recently only, the last few years, I've only

become one that can poop in public.

I've always been a home pooper.

Yeah.

But now I've learned to do outside as well.

Wow.

Yeah.

Not outside, but like.

And do you remember the first place you ever vacationed or whatever?

Ooh, first vacation.

No, that you took a poop outside.

I mean, oh, I'm not saying outside.

I'm just saying like...

Oh, yeah, that you took a home.

I'm like, I'm like outside of the home, right?

Sometimes, yeah.

The first place you took, like, a little,

like, I'm always fine with like a hotel.

I mean, like, a restaurant, like a gas station.

I think it was like a gas station in Alabama.

We were doing some sort of road trip for, um, it was called Barstow versus America.

And it was like a 10-city road trip.

And we were on RV.

So literally, we had to.

So that was, that was when I learned how to do it.

It was like, but Backwoods, Alabama gas station.

And it was kind of, it was, it was fine.

We got through it.

You know, not poop shame.

No.

Yeah, I think especially like you just have to realize that everybody's doing it, you know?

You have, you really, really do.

But it's kind of crazy that everybody's doing it.

I still don't believe it.

You know, it's crazy.

Yeah, it's just as crazy as thinking that 260 million chickens are killed each day.

It's, it's, I do like to do it, though.

It's awesome.

But I never think of anyone else doing it, you know?

Like maybe one night, me and you were at dinner one night, and let's say go to the bathroom for five minutes.

Is he freshening up or is he pooping?

Yeah.

Well, the craziest thing is if you like, say you go, like,

if you have to, if you try to poop at a high speed because you don't want people to think you're in there doing a number two, right?

Exactly.

That is very taxing on the system, I think.

Look that up.

Is it even okay to kind of shit at high speed or whatever?

Yeah, I need to like chill for a few minutes.

I can't, it's very hard to get in and out.

I need to chill.

Well, yeah, because if you like pooping fast, meaning having a bowel movement quickly, is not inherently bad.

In fact, it can be a sign of a healthy digestive system as long as it's not accompanied by discomfort or other concerning symptoms.

Normal transit time of bowel movement should ideally take a couple of minutes with minimal straining.

Okay.

But right.

But okay.

Then how long does it take to urinate in a restaurant or whatever?

I'm going to say two minutes.

But that, the pooping just said, let me see, 15 to 30 seconds to empty their bladder.

What?

Where'd you get your bladder from, dude?

Austin Powers XP.

30 seconds is a lot of pee.

And I'm trying to pee more.

30 30 seconds is a lot of pee?

You think it's less?

That's not.

Dude, I will rat.

I blatantly, I casually will piss for fucking 70 seconds.

I just heard you had a nice dream.

That had nothing.

That was a nice dream for like a few minutes.

That was nothing.

I could still cry after that.

I could pee so much that I can't cry for an hour.

Really?

Oh, I'm a quick peer then, I think.

I'll put it all out.

I don't even, I'm very, I love to, I think, pee.

And so I won't even wear underpants that are really tight anymore because I don't want that added outside influence on

all naturale yeah because it'll kind of like tighten around your bladder you know i don't like that i like to pee as god wants as i want you ever done a um poop on a plane

sure i have not not one that stands up it's just so compartmentalized you literally feel like you're playing hide and go seek and having a shit at the same time yeah because you know you're just kind of like yeah you're talking about pooping at a high speed that's what came into my brain immediately because that if you're that you're going 400 miles an hour that's a top speed it's about as fast as you could go in the world.

Yeah.

That's crazy.

It is crazy.

Planes are crazy.

It's so, I don't even let myself think about planes because they're so

even planes now are crazy.

How did someone even come up with the idea for a plane?

How did the Wright brothers even do that?

And

in like 90, what did they make it in, like 1920?

It was fun.

But the planes were shitty.

A lot of people died right out of the gate.

Like, there's

like seven Wright brothers, and we only know about two of them.

So is that actually true?

Right there.

1903?

Yeah.

So why did someone, why did people even get on the Titanic?

There were planes nine years before.

I don't know.

That's a great question, dude.

Oh, my God.

That was nine years before the Titanic.

Yeah, that's unreal.

You could just hold out one more year and there'd be a decent flight over there.

Wait, can you just look up the first transcontinental flight?

Because now I need to see when we finally crossed the road.

I was like flying right above the Titanic.

That's so funny.

You know what's another weird, crazy thing to think about?

You know, the Hindenburg?

That was a blimp that just came here from Germany.

They blimped from Germany.

1911.

This is before the Titanic.

The first transcontinent flight across the United States was made by Calbrev Perry Rogers in 1911, taking 49 days with numerous stops and crashes.

That doesn't sound like a successful flight.

It took 49 days to get.

Sheep's Head Bay, Brooklyn.

Wow, anything taken off out of Brooklyn is questionable, dude.

There's a lot of Haitians over there in the park these days at Williamsburg.

There's a reason both airports are in Queens, LaGuardia and JFK.

Oh, there's a lot of Haitians selling sex in the park over there that Biden let in.

That's what I heard.

I believe it.

Oh, man.

That's a fun fact.

Oh, yeah, I just saw this the other day.

Wi-Fi routers now tracking motion.

Xfinity's new feature.

Since the start of the year, Xfinity, a major Comcast brand brand for telecommunication services in America, has been notifying users about a useful new feature, Wi-Fi Motion.

It allows turning internet devices into motion sensors that monitor movement at home.

I believe it.

I believe it.

The other day

I was in one of those Waymo's.

You ever been to Waymo yet?

No, I've been in the middle of the day.

Self-driving cars.

I was in one in Santa Monica, and they have sensors around them that literally the screen in the car, it not only tracks the cars around you, it tracks the people on the street.

So like if you're at a stop sign and people are crossing the street, you see little tiny people on the map crossing.

Like it mimics their movements.

I guess it must be some sort of the same technology as that.

It's fucking terrifying.

Yeah, that sounds that sounds super terrifying.

They have that too in Teslas where you can see the people.

And even if it's a guy with dreadlocks, something you see that it's kind of crazy.

Like if it's a person carrying a bag or something.

But the idea, like, I guess what are the concerns about this?

It says, how does it, how does it sense motion?

Wi-Fi signals travel between the router and other devices, and anything between them can disrupt the signal.

Wi-Fi signals bounce around, and the sensing area is not a straight line, but an oval between the two devices.

So it's like if you pass, like, you know, it'll just be able to know where you are in your home.

That seems really scary.

I guess it could kind of maybe be good for not health reasons, but if people suddenly die, like if they stop moving out of the blue, maybe they could pick that up.

That's a good point.

You know, like if someone trips and falls or something, like an old person can't get up, like at least notify maybe.

That would be a good thing.

But how many people are going to forget this even happens?

They probably have it activated already in their homes.

They don't even know it.

And then there's some dude at a call center somewhere outside of

Toledo and he's just watching some hologram lonely dude just jerk off for like 600th time.

He's walking the silhouette and just go up and down.

I mean, let him have fun.

I know.

But let boys eat.

And then he streams that to like India or some other country where they, you know, and then he, you're basically being live streamed.

The hologram of you is being live streamed out.

It's just like, I don't know.

Everything's just getting too crazy, dude.

Yeah.

Technology, I'm out on it.

I'm not a big fan of it.

I mean, it's, it's scary.

Like we, we just had to wear these metaglasses.

We wore

meta glasses to the UFC fighters.

That's what y'all were doing.

It was great.

But the technology on them are, it's unbelievable what it does.

It's crazy.

Like they were telling us there's a feature that it could, um, like if you were talking Spanish to me right now, it could translate it in my ear to me.

Yeah.

That's wild.

It's, it's crazy.

The stuff that people are making is crazy.

I mean, you have a cyber truck.

That must be, you used to have that, right?

That must be insane.

Oh, it's like driving a day.

I mean, dude, it's faster than an email sometimes.

Would you floor that thing?

It's like, dude, you feel like literally you could send an email, run, get in it, and drive to a place that you, that you emailed and see if you got there right there.

Intercept the email.

Yeah.

It's crazy it's something yeah it's like you could land in somebody's inbox before a uh jpeg for sure um

yeah but i think it's all just scary and there's no protection for us that's the scariest thing there's like i don't think our government wants to protect us at all yeah the ai stuff too i'm i'm i'm ai is getting to the point where i'm the new villain in mission impossible is ai that's literally the villain in the new mission impossible like me and so i watched the last one i haven't seen the new one yet i watched the last one i'm playing and the villain because it's a two-part movie this is the second part that just came out.

The villain is AI.

He's an AI villain.

Like, what do you mean when he's an AI villain?

Like, he's a what, like, what do you mean by that?

It was, um, like, he's a computer.

Yeah.

So the first scene, I think it's these guys on a sub, these army guys on a submarine, and there's this, there's this, um, I think it's maybe the Russians or something.

They made this AI system and the system overrides it and like becomes its own entity and like kill, like they're sending out a missile, and then the system sends the missile back into them.

So all those dudes die.

And then it's like, it's this AI thing.

It's like an AI monster.

It's wild.

Fuck.

To the point where it's a mission impossible villain.

Oh, it's definitely dude.

It's getting to the point where all these like, all like these like tech guys, right?

They're all like trying to platform.

Like, I think they're all going to, they want to put chips in it.

It's all going to get to the point where we.

They all own and we're, they use us as their robot.

That's what's starting that.

Like, that's where I believe that things kind of seem like they're going because you have a few tech companies.

They're going to start to own everything.

Yeah.

So we're, we're all going to be, and they do, they do too many insane things.

Like, my buddy Tommy, Tommy Smokes, this great guy, he fucking puts in obituaries for me on AI and they send out like an obituary for myself.

Oh, it's, it's terrifying.

I don't want to see my obituary.

When does it say?

What does it happen?

Uh, they had me doing, um, I forgot what it was.

It was Vegas.

It was, it was something in Vegas, though.

What month?

Oh, you died in Vegas?

No, that was it.

It was like, oh, it was found in his hotel in Vegas, I think.

And it's like, I'll send it to you.

He sent it to to me.

They made a long YouTube obituary.

Damn.

For myself.

January.

Yeah, that's when I want to go.

Not this January.

Really?

Yeah, because it's always a tough month, kind of.

I feel like a lot has been fun.

And then you're kind of figuring out the new year.

Maybe football month.

That's a good point.

I think the worst month, which I wouldn't mind going, I like to enjoy a summer.

So maybe.

I don't really know.

I love every month.

Yeah, you're right.

It's hard to find a bad month.

Maybe April.

April's kind of, yeah.

I think you're right.

There's not much happening in it.

Yeah, we're we're waiting for the next thing.

February.

I want to see, oh, how's the new whip, man, from OnlyStands?

Didn't you get a new car?

Yeah, well, it lives at Caleb's.

It's Caleb's, but I gave it to Caleb.

Well, it's this.

So it's literally a, it's a moak.

So it's like a baby between a Jeep and a golf cart, basically.

Okay.

So it's a little tiny car, and the lovely lady lives in Florida that got it for me, Bryce Adams.

So I have originally was planning on, I originally was planning on driving it back to Caleb's and just leaving it at Caleb's.

and then i you can't even drive on the highway with it i didn't realize like how slow it is it's like only goes 25 miles an hour so driving from her house to caleb's house would have taken legitimately probably like eight hours and um it's just super so it's very slow but it's it's awesome

i honestly me and caleb have not been in del ray in so long i haven't been able to drive it in a while but yeah it's it loads of caleb's house now this girl really just bought that for you yeah it was pretty awesome It was definitely pretty awesome.

And it's always been one of my dreams to own those things.

Like they're, they're so sick.

The one problem is I definitely underestimated how slow they are they're very slow but driving around in it driving around delray beach in it put some tunes on it's a fantastic little vibe go to the beach i've gone to the beach with it twice so far and it's fantastic but yeah there's really no way i could even get it to new york i don't even know how i would go about getting it to home yeah and it wouldn't play well at home because like we have a great little beach town by us but i'm like 20 minutes from the beach so i can't even bring it there so i think leaving it at kabs is perfect and then whenever i'm in delray i could enjoy it and play with it and it's amazing and and it's it's a beautiful beautiful car i love it yeah it's really neat looking looks like kind of a g-wagon kind of, but it's like a small G-Wagon.

Yeah.

My one problem, though, is I couldn't figure out the seats for the longest time.

So I was driving around very uncomfortably.

I was like scrunched up in the middle of it.

Now I eventually figured it out, though.

And it's awesome.

Got Bluetooth hooked up in there.

It's a great vibe.

It's just a good vibe for sure.

But then they'll be able to own it, dude.

That in a couple of, like in a year from now, say you want to go somewhere, but then the AI decides you can't.

They're like, nah, come back.

You're out.

You have to be at work in one hour.

You have to.

I'm just like, that's what starts to scare me.

You think I have to, you think I'm being scared too much, Glenny?

I don't think you're being scared.

I mean, everyone freaks out about AI.

AI is terrible.

Like

when you have this entity of a computer that could be its own being, it's scary.

Like the other day, actually, I was walking around in Santa Monica.

I walked past a Tesla store and they had the robot in the window.

And it was creepy to see.

Like, that's movie shit.

That's movie shit.

You don't see movie shit in real life.

Seeing that robot in that window was terrifying.

Yeah.

I don't need robots.

Yeah, just like, God, I thought we were having a decent time and everything's fucking getting weird.

I just don't understand.

And some people have the robots like in their house.

I don't know if I could live in a house with a robot.

How could you live in a house with a robot?

You know, it's listening.

The fucking Wi-Fi is now listening.

The Wi-Fi now knows where you're moving around.

Can you imagine waking up one night, middle of the night, and just in your room?

Just

there.

The robots in there.

Yeah, I'm saying, I'm saying, and sitting up smoking.

Imagine you wake up, it's had three ANW root beers, and you're like, Where do you wow?

It's an abusive robot.

Yeah.

No, and it's upset about it about because it lost at the freaking horse horse track.

You know what I'm saying?

There's just so many people that are like,

what is going to happen?

I'm out.

I'm out.

I think we're good, though.

But the robots.

No, we're good.

I think our lifetime may,

I think we'll be good with the robots.

I'm thinking like 200 years down the line, we may be like when they're in society, kind of.

I'm just scared, man.

Even like that Xfinity thing, say like that they can like know where you're at in your home, right?

Just the thing that they know, right?

And you're right.

If you're an old person, you fall in.

I mean, that's one immediate pro.

Right.

That thing is great.

But if you are,

you don't want to go to work, right?

And you say you're sick, but you're not.

You're just at home building like one of those houses, a car or something, doing some fun thing, doing a puzzle or something.

And they're like, we know you're not sick.

You know what I'm saying?

Like, it could get to that point where it's just like,

you can't even lie.

You know, it would be nice to not be able to lie, but it's also fun to be able to just make a puzzle sometimes or be by yourself.

Yeah, we can't have Wi-Fi ratting on us.

That's when it crosses.

That's what you would have.

I don't want Wi-Fi ratting on us.

No,

you got to be able to do what's in the comfort of your own home in the comfort of your own home without the Wi-Fi checking us out.

Yeah.

Or if you said a bad word or something, we'll report you.

Ooh.

I'm down on it.

Someone said

in the 400 block.

In the 400 block of Long Island.

Hey, what happened to

that Long Island serial killer?

You ever crossed paths with him?

No, but he legitimately...

So my best friend Johnny, he lives around the block from him.

Literally, the house was around the block.

It's 20 minutes from my house.

Like my favorite Cajun restaurant is, he's right next to my favorite Cajun restaurant.

This place, Big Daddy's, he's four minutes from.

So it's terrifying to think about.

He was doing, I just watched a three-part documentary on it that came out last week.

He was just doing like a New York City commute every single day.

I would actually, I would almost say it's not crazy that me and him have probably been on like the same train together or something before because he was doing the, I'm on that same train line and he was doing the commute to and from New York for 20 years.

So I would venture to guess we were probably on a train together at some point, which is very, very scary to think about.

He's 20 minutes from my house.

And that documentary is, it was, it was on Peacock, I think.

It was a very, very, very interesting watch.

The Gilgo Beach serial killer.

Yeah, like this is, so where he dumped every, all these bodies at Gilgo Beach.

This was my COVID drive.

Every Friday during COVID, like there was nothing to do.

I would just take this ride down the beach.

Like it's like a 40-minute drive from my house.

And I didn't even realize this is where all the bodies are.

And it's scary because there's no...

There's no businesses.

There's nothing there.

It's really just a beach and a few houses.

And it's a one-lane highway.

And that's where he dumped all those bodies.

It's terrifying.

That's crazy.

It almost doesn't even cross my brain of how, of how simulated, how simulated he was into like life.

Like I did, I've did that drive every Friday during COVID.

Right.

And imagine you're driving.

It's hard enough to even pull over to change a tire or something, like, especially on a busy road.

And at night, there's got to be, he's got to, I mean, he did it.

There's probably no one around.

And the only thing you're surrounded by is water, really, because it's a one-lane highway.

It's two lanes each way.

What a crazy world to live in.

Yep.

Did you see, I don't know if it's too much dark of a topic, but I've really been keeping up with it.

Did you see

that Koberger guy took a plea deal today?

So he's just not going to get the death penalty.

He's going to go to jail for the rest of your life.

Yeah.

I'm not a fan of him.

I don't like that very much.

Oh, I think that's unbelievable.

I think that the parents, I think there's a video, they asked the father what he thought about it.

One of the parents.

Yeah,

the parents are definitely mad about it.

They are.

Yeah, but I actually, I'm don't,

it's hard to say when you're not in that position, but I almost think a life of prison would be worse than death penalty.

Oh, well, here's what, I think he's going to get killed in prison pretty quick.

I would think so, too.

And that's way worse than a firing squad.

I think we're allowed to say, I hope he gets killed in prison.

I don't, I don't like him very much.

He's a yeah, I believe that.

I mean, I'm a proponent of, of, of the death penalty.

I believe that he should, I believe that, yeah, because here's the thing.

It's like we're wandering around with Satan and pure evil amongst us, right?

I know that people make mistakes and things happen, right?

That I understand.

But sometimes we're wandering around with pure evil, right?

And we're like, hey, maybe we should see how pure evil feels on a witness stand for seven years.

Yeah.

I don't give a fuck.

If it's pure evil, why don't you tell me that, Xfinity?

Tell me, just tell me who's pure evil.

You know what I'm saying?

I don't think we would ask AI that because I think it would probably turn immediately on a lot of its creators.

That one was about as bad as it gets.

I've been keeping up with that for the whole time.

I don't know why that really struck with me.

It's the Cobra.

It's scary.

Oh, it's so terrible.

because so many

pictures of them like they're just they're just normal college kids yeah that's like

just a crazy night out on the out on the town it seemed like yeah normal normal normal friday saturday night whatever it was come home and they're probably all probably all still drunk and then they just wake up and this nut job is here and the guy looks like a satan

like a partner of satan or buddy of satan it's like we keep acting like these people that look like satan aren't satan

Like I love how people are like, oh, that guy looks like he's not doing well.

That guy to me looks like a Satan guy.

He's horrifying.

He's heartfelt.

He's horrifying.

That was, I was like, it was a...

Because he got in there.

And wait, didn't the DoorDash lady see him?

I don't know.

Because I think it's seen, and it's so terrible, too, because I don't know who saw him.

I think he snuck in and then he went.

I don't know which child he went for first.

It's so scary.

But that was, it was interesting to see how the police did that work because I remember everyone was freaking out like where is he?

Where is he?

Where is he?

And meanwhile, they were tracking him for like two weeks, which was awesome.

Like they got him in fucking Pennsylvania.

They knew.

And he also did a horrible job at it.

I think they were seeing what he was up to trying to get.

Yeah, like everyone was like, oh, where is this guy?

Where's this guy?

And they knew the whole time.

So, and then he, yeah, because he also left that knife sheath there too.

Yeah, that was, that was a creepy stuff.

Because it's so scary because so many times you've gotten home.

It's been drunk with your friend.

What's going on?

You wake up.

You don't even know.

Things are scary enough, you can barely remember.

Yeah, and then everyone was freaking out about it because there are other two girls that were in there didn't say anything.

Like, they were, I guess, like caught up in their rooms.

They were probably obviously scared shitless.

One of them saw him, I think.

It's crazy.

Yeah, all the little things that happen, man.

It's so heartbreaking.

Just the pain that the families go through.

And then I bet there's a weird part

where you want to never have it be in the media, but at the same time, like

you almost get addicted to watching the story unfold because you have, it's all that's there of your child still in a weird way, you know?

I don't know.

That might sound crazy.

Does that sound crazy?

I don't think so.

You're saying about people talking about it in the news.

Right.

Cause you want your child to be alive.

So it's like the fact that they are named.

And putting awareness to people.

Yeah.

It's like, I don't know.

But yeah, that was a story that really stuck, cut me deep.

It was terrifying.

I did not like that.

Yeah.

Obviously.

Well, it's just like, yeah, how long are we, do we just live amongst evil and pretend that we it's dudes like that and the dudes like this here, like the island gilgo beach killer yeah it's like i like we were saying like i i would venture to guess i've been on a train with that guy

i would not be shocked if if i somehow could look i've yeah i could look up our train records i bet we've been on the same let's say train or cross paths what if you sat there next to him huh i actually saw a clip of a girl saying she was on the train he like came and sat next to her one day and she was like i remember that guy and he was like he said something very weird to her and then she just got off the train but even thinking about that like that that woman too is like just

had a little brush with yeah true evil yeah

i met a dude one time um

who

his mom had

uh rejected the

who was the guy that killed everybody at florida state

not dahmer ted bundy was i didn't know ted bundy was florida state yeah ted bonnie yeah at the end of his whole deal he killed some people at florida state at a sorority house i think that's where they bought after that they busted him um but somebody had escaped him like dang yeah scary to think about even um son of sam like i remember my parents my parents always tell me this uh in like 1977 they say it was like the summer of sam there's a spike lee man movie about it even he um

there was one time in the summer it was the whole city went blacked out and he was like free people knew there was a serial killer the whole city had a blackout and my like they said they were the whole city was freaking out because no one knows where he is no one knows who he is there's this it's 1977 there's no lights like my dad said like him and his friends like walking around with like bats like just like trying to trying to find him like they're just gonna find the the son of Sam.

But yeah, they said that was like one of the scariest days ever.

That's so sick.

And also crazy to think this guy, he's 24.

You did this when he's 24.

You think the guy looks like 24 years old?

Yeah, first of all,

yeah.

If I saw this dude, I would immediately be like, hey, this dude's a serial killer.

Yeah, he was a nut.

He claimed that he was like talking to his neighbor's dog and his neighbor's dog made him do it.

Yeah.

Oh, dude, a lot of times where people are like, God, I think that guy's a serial killer.

Well, hey, check it out and see if he is.

Okay.

You know what I'm saying?

Yeah, you should be allowed to investigate a little bit.

Yeah.

Can Infinity pick that up for us?

How about this, Infinity?

Tell us where the fucking serial killers are.

That would help everybody out way more.

You know, so that would be one more bonus of that whole thing.

Yeah, that's an interesting thing then.

Could it actually, like all seriousness, could that help with crime?

A lot, I would assume, right?

Oh, well, I think one of the reasons that they're even doing like all this ICE stuff where they're deportations and that sort of thing, we're about to get into a surveillance state, right?

And so you wouldn't even be able to be like technically illegal in America anymore.

Like you can just see how they're just getting all the paperwork done.

Like you wouldn't, because we're going to show that soon there will be drones in the sky.

There'll be things.

There'll be a new system that is just monitoring us at all times.

It'll just know everything.

It'll know everything.

Yeah.

Right?

I mean,

we're already granting that access to technology, right?

There was a part in the big beautiful bill.

I think it just, I don't know if it passed both houses or the Senate and the Congress, but U.S.

Senate passes Trump's sweeping tax and spending bills setting up House battle.

So that's going to be interesting.

J.D.

Vance was the

tying vote or the tiebreaking vote, I guess.

I think this is a bad bill after from what I've learned.

Yeah.

I don't know much about it, honestly.

Yeah, it's okay.

And I'm sorry for bringing it up.

No, no worries.

But I don't think that it's.

You know, I learned one thing about these bills.

There's these things called omnibus bills, right?

So instead of there just being like one bill, And so everybody votes on it, like, hey, what do you think about this?

Uh, higher taxes for this tax bracket?

And you'd be like, everybody could vote no one or everybody could vote yes.

But they'll be like, what do you think about this?

And that's just, that would be one bill.

But an omnibus bill is a bunch of bills at once.

So it's like, what do you think about this higher tax bracket?

But also,

what do you think about

we give

extra stipends to people that served in the military?

So you only get to vote yes or no, though.

Oh.

So that's how they get it.

So it's got to be a two-for-one is that's how they get the things they want.

Right.

Because you hear the military, you're like, oh, I want to vote for that, but then you're also voting for the other thing.

Yeah.

Interesting.

And there's like seven or eight of those sometimes in a bill.

And there could be, I don't even know how many, but sometimes there's a lot.

And then if, say, you or somebody that votes against it, you're like, I'm voting no because I don't want my people to have higher tax.

Sure, it's going to affect this thing of the military.

But then the other campaigns will run commercials against you.

He voted no on

money for the military.

I could hear those, yeah, yeah, all those shitty local political commercials.

But they don't say in that commercial, he voted yes on saving his people from like raising taxes.

So that's how it's all done, dude.

It's this whole fucking tricky system, and it's called omnibus bills.

And anyway, I just learned about that.

So it's bad.

I never forget.

Yeah, I never knew it either.

Yeah, because it always seems like, well, why wouldn't they, you know, because nothing ever gets done.

That's

why I don't like pay attention to it.

Nothing happens.

Dude, shit's so bad.

Joey Chessina had to come back to fucking America.

He had to stop making his vegan money.

Yeah, dude.

Bro, he had to come back and fucking start slurping dogs again, dude.

Oh, man.

He was at a Fanatics Fest last week killing it.

Was he?

Did you see him?

Did you guys go?

Yeah, we went to Fanatics Fest.

We had, we went with Meta again.

We were rocking our glasses.

And he had Todd Graves had him do a.

It was Todd, Libby, Dunn, and Drewski against Joey Chestnut in a chicken tender eating contest.

In a Keynes contest.

Joey Joey Chestnut's laps, celebs, and chicken eating contests.

Sorry, Libby.

Yeah, I don't even know how many.

Oh, and they had DJ Khaled, too.

He was against DJ Khaled as well.

Oh, dude.

You'd think he'd take one of those fucking wings out of his mouth for a second and speak up for his home country, but no, that's just who he is.

Go on.

That's a funny image of DJ Khaled looking at him in disbelief.

Look at him taking those 10 D's.

He doesn't have to dip those 10 Ds.

Well, that's the whole thing, man.

Dipping it into that.

That was a fun week.

That was cool.

I met

my childhood hero.

I was very, very intimidated.

Who was Henrik Lundquist?

He used to be a goalie for the Rangers.

He's literally still on my wall.

He's my number one person ever.

And Caleb is from North Carolina, doesn't give a fuck about hockey.

So he eventually stopped.

He's a stud.

He eventually grabbed him and was like, dude, I'm sorry.

Could you come meet my friend for a second?

And I was like, yes, please.

Thank God.

And it was one of the happier moments I've had.

I haven't, I used to go to the mall to do his signings.

Lundquist?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

He's a beast.

When I was like a child, like my first Ranger game was like his second game ever when I was like nine years old.

So I've just always loved him.

That was a that was a big moment for me.

That made my weekend, made my year.

That's magical, man.

You guys just had the first round draft pick, didn't you for the rest of the day?

The Islanders did.

They had the first overall pick.

So I'm very anti-Islanders.

Oh, you're anti-Ilanders?

Yeah, even though I live on Long Island.

Like my whole family is from Queens, though.

So we're all Rangers fans.

Like I hated the Islanders so much.

My high school I went to was down the block from the Islanders Arena.

And I didn't want to go to that high school because of that.

But I did go because my friends went.

But yeah, I'm not a fan of that.

But love the Rangers and love Henrik.

So that was a big moment for me.

My heart's beating right now thinking about it oh yeah we walked by him like three times like kept hitting kaya henrick henrik

and finally he he did it that is pretty cool huh i was praying someone there like because one of our buddies was there matt who's a sports agent and he was there and i tell him dude i gotta meet henric he's like he's my guy i'll introduce you i was like could you please introduce me at some point just so like just be like hey this guy's a good guy But we didn't.

Caleb just had to go up there.

Caleb had to raw dug it, but thankfully he did raw dug it.

One times you got to watch it.

Dude, at the UFC fights, so I'm back.

We were like behind, like backstage or something kind of thing.

And this is a place you can go back there and get a coffee and use a restroom really fast, you know, and like you try to stay out of people's way because these are like the most dangerous guys in the world coming through and you know, getting ready to do their most dangerous thing.

Yes.

So I went back there and there's this guy and I thought it was Steve A Miochik, right?

He's like a famous fighter that just retired.

And so I asked two UFC employees, I was like, is that?

Who is that?

And they both said, that's Steve A.

Miocyk, right?

And I'd met him a couple times before, and he had glasses on when I met him.

And

this guy didn't have glasses on.

I'm like, oh, maybe he's just, you know, retiring and his eyes are getting better because he just retired.

Like, maybe his eyes have been getting better since he is not getting

beaten in the head or whatever.

So I went over and I was like, what's up, man?

You know, how's retirement going?

And I kind of fucking...

I don't want to say tickled him a little bit, but I kind of went like that a little, like something I shouldn't have done, you know, or just like, no, nothing crazy.

One hand.

If you two hands.

Rebuild a soldier.

Yeah.

Like, good to see you, daddy.

You know, welcome home, boy.

Welcome home.

What do you do?

And he kind of, he was like, huh?

And I could feel it fucking get everything switched really quick.

And I was like, what's up, Stipe?

You know, how was retirement?

And then that's when I realized it was not him.

And his wife was right there.

And like, I was like, oh, fuck.

I was like, how do the people that work here not even know?

Cross-referenced twice.

Two times to make sure.

Anyway, it was jan baklo blako jan blakovich that sounds way scarier than stipe majochic and he was he ended up uh he ended up cutting me some slack about it and he was and then he even made a joke about it later um but anyway yeah it's sometimes you're just like that's a scary thing sometimes about being around those places because there's some real

and i've never heard that guy's name that jan bakovich bring up i think he'd been a ufc fighter that i don't know sounds scarier than ufc fighter you do know yeah like the like the the hard-nosed dogs that the casual fan does not know sounds scary.

Steve, I've heard him.

Cleveland legend, I believe.

Then look at just a general picture if you saw one and the other.

Those are very similar.

Yeah, similar enough and both amazing fighters.

Let me look at Blahovych's history.

Blahovi.

His fight history real quick.

Is he Russian, I assume?

Or Polish?

Let me see.

Oh, yeah.

Polish power.

He fought Izzy, beat Izzy.

Yeah, I think that's when Izzy tried to move up.

So he was a, yeah.

Dude, it was former freaking light heavyweight champion Jan Bukovich right there.

Beautiful wife.

Anyway, great guy.

Sorry, Jan.

And Steve A.

I hope retirement's going well.

Okay.

Yes, Steve A.

Cleveland legend.

I know that about him.

Oh, you do?

Yes.

I know he's a Cleveland legend.

Dude, he can come out and support the freaking women's basketball team that's going to be there.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Definitely.

Cleveland, underrated city.

Yeah.

Oh, dude.

Cleveland is great.

I love the mall that they have it down there.

Have you been in that old mall that the reef?

I think they're reefing.

Is there like a hotel in it yeah i stayed in that hotel one time me too like years ago comedy years have always put us up there yeah like me and my parents had like a road trip to chicago we stopped in cleveland and stayed at the hotel within the in the mall cleveland's cool city i like it underrated underrated place people gets a bad rap and cincinnati oh i think both underrated cities a lot of good people out there um well glenny man i'm just good to see you dude i think you yeah i'm excited to see what else you guys want to do in the world you think you'd ever end up on a cooking show could we see you being uh the next um

Who's that guy?

Not Juan Batista.

What's his name?

Oh,

Bourduiere.

Anthony Bourdain.

Anthony Bourdain.

Yeah.

I mean, I love Anthony Bourdain.

I mean, I love doing food shit.

That's my favorite thing to do.

Aside from being a larger gentleman myself, I do actually enjoy food.

Food's awesome.

I don't like just eating it.

I don't like eating too much of it even.

I'm at the stage in my life where I like the taste.

I'd rather every place I go to just be a tasting menu.

Just have a few bites of each thing and get on with my life.

But yeah, I mean, that would be really fun.

I think me and Caleb may have to do the Airbnb idea.

We've got to actually look into that.

Yeah.

And if you had your own series of Airbnbs where people could go and they were like, everything from you guys is vibes, maybe.

That'd be dope.

Yeah.

But yeah, it's been a...

Ooh, I'd love to go down a black olive rabbit hole with you sometime.

Wow, can I burst your bubble here?

I'm not the biggest olive person.

Really?

Yeah, I'm a bad Greek.

I don't love olives.

I don't go crazy for them.

Black olive, dude.

They've been through a lot.

I like black olives.

They're good by me.

I don't like calamada olives.

Those are gross.

Or February olives, as some people call them.

But even like when I get martinis, I love martinis now.

I get the olive, I just have them there for the aesthetic, though.

I don't even eat them.

Yeah, I just leave them there.

You people usually feed them to the drunk girl at the bar.

There's like, there's always that drunk girl who said like 60 olives, and she's just wrecked.

She's just spraying olives.

She just tied a little stick in their mouth.

She's just fucking spraying pavement relish in the fucking parking lot later on.

I'm going to tell you my last right before you leave.

The invention that I came out with years ago that's never been happened by science yet: the olivado.

An avocado olive olive child?

Yeah.

Enlighten me.

That's what it is.

Because

olives are kind of salty a little.

And avocados, they always had a little more salt in them.

The olive cato.

Ooh.

And they've done food stuff like that before.

They made

with dogs.

You know what?

Can I give you a business idea that I've always thought about?

I want your take on it.

Fully clothed strip club.

Hmm.

I've always said I have two business ideas, fully clothed strip club and fat-only gym.

Only fat people could go.

And then when you finally lose the weight, you could still go to the gym and you could be inspiration for the other fats there.

Ooh, I love that.

And it'll be like 40.

You can wear a shirt.

Every year you get like a necklace or something.

It's like 20, like 11 months non-fat.

You get like a, yeah, you get a picture on the Hall of Fame.

If you lose the weight, you get on the Hall of Fame.

You're in there when you walk in.

And you can be like, oh, look, there's Roger.

He's still doing good.

Like, he's not putting back on.

He's doing good.

So I think that would be a fun idea one day.

Just do a fat-only gym.

I love that, dude.

Yeah.

I think it's a great idea.

Fat-only gym.

Called Foggs.

Foggies.

Foggies Gym.

Fat-only gym.

Not a horrible idea.

Because let me tell you,

we don't like going to the gym, man.

We don't like being seen by skinnies.

It's horrible.

Yeah, I think it's interesting what life is like.

And we're all carrying some different type of thing that makes us feel uncomfortable, you know.

It's interesting.

Yeah, especially just being, being at the gym in general, was a lot.

My friends, we're here actually.

We were here like a year ago.

And they were all going to to the gym and i was like it i'll just go with them because i was hopping i bought an elliptical at my house so i was got an elliptical there we went to um

you ever heard the quantum over here i've heard like demumbrian it's like a hot girl gym there's like all the all the chicks in there in their hot gym outfits and then there's all these bros and their cool gym outfits and i'm there in like in n1 shorts and a fucking Mets shirt and looking like an idiot.

And like, it was weird because then like some people were coming up to me and like being like, oh, Gunny, what's up?

And like, giving me like a high five.

And almost like I could see, tell in the way they're talking that it was like, uh,

like they were trying to like make me feel welcome at the gym because they know I'm not a gym guy.

And that made me feel so weird.

Like it was almost like a, it was almost like a, oh, like, keep going, like, good work.

And I was like, like, I was on the bench and one guy came over and fistbound me and was like, good to see you here.

And I was like, oh, I was like, oh,

like when an Irish, like when a British guy shows up at a dentist or whatever for the first time.

Yeah, they were just trying.

Like, they were trying to be nice about it.

But it was,

yeah.

Good to see you.

Almost like good to see you at church for the first time in a while.

It's like, oh,

they really just want to say, good of you for bettering yourself, is what they really were trying to say in a nice way.

And it just felt really weird.

Yeah.

That was my last time at a hot girl gym.

You're always welcome here, man.

Thank you, brother.

This was fun.

I've had a good weekend.

This is the most time I've ever spent together.

It is, dude.

And I enjoyed it.

Thank you, bro.

I enjoyed it too, dude.

You're a special guy in the world.

And yeah, thanks for the support this weekend, too.

I was kind of going through it, but you were right there for me.

Hell yeah.

Yeah, dude.

Glenny Balls, you can catch him with Caleb Presley on Sunday Conversation, and it's always out and about.

And then he'll be changing the world, dude.

I get scared easily if you can't tell.

Me too.

I don't know what happened.

You can catch him out and about in the world with Caleb Presley on their show, Sunday Conversation.

Thanks so much, brother.

Thank you, brother.

And thank you for everything this weekend.

Happy 4th of July to all.

Happy 4th of July, huh?

Now I'm just falling on the breeze, and I feel I'm falling like these leaves.

I must be

cornerstone.

Oh, but when I reach that ground, I'll share this peace of mind.

I found I can feel it

in my bones.

But it's gonna take

a little bit of time.