#586 - Nigel Ng (Uncle Roger)

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Today's guest is a content creator, a restaurateur,

and a comedian.

He is from from Malaysia,

and he found his way to the UK and America by doing comedy.

He's known for his character, Uncle Roger, Uncle Roger,

a grumpy food critic who roasts celebrity chefs.

And with that, he's gained more than 30 million followers.

Quite the ride with today's guest.

I couldn't be more geeked to get to hang out with Nigel Ung.

What's the most vain Asians you think?

Because Asians, you don't think of, because people think about Asians a lot, right?

Do they?

Do they think about Asians a lot?

Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

Okay.

Okay.

Yeah.

Why?

Why would you think about this a lot?

Because I think it's fascinating.

Okay.

Right.

Because people can't, some people can't believe it.

They see it.

They...

You show somebody, like you show a baby an Asian or whatever, I think they'd be surprised, kind of.

No, they look the same.

Smaller eyes, squintier eyes, that's it.

Oh, that's a good point.

Some of them are, I guess if you have a tall baby, yeah.

Yeah.

We are a little, little squintier, little flatter nose.

That's it, really.

You're all the same, man.

Yeah.

Some of us can look wider than you.

Some of us can be fairer than white people oh yeah that's a good point huh yeah i think we should have the we should have some white white privilege

yeah yeah that's

i'm wider than you look at this look at this yeah look at this honky

look at this freaking uh sesame cracker oh thank you

thanks for inviting me on here theo dude it's a pleasure man thank you so much but no what what a um

Nigel, Nigel, Nigel, Nigel, Nigel, yes.

And how do you say the last name?

Ung.

Ung.

Ung.

Ung.

It's

Southeast Asian, Malaysian last name.

That's where I'm from originally.

Yeah, that's a living.

You got it.

You're the damn living in word right there.

I can't even.

I know.

It's dangerous, isn't it?

Oh, it's dangerous.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It is.

Just a few letters away.

It's risky.

There's an N-I-G.

There's no A in there, thankfully.

Yeah, but

there's enough there.

I think we're about, like, people would be like, what's going on?

Yeah,

that's that meme of the Vietnamese restaurant.

The name of the restaurant is B-I-C-H, N-G-A.

Oh, oh.

Just pronouncing, just ordering food, huh?

Yeah, just call it the Vietnamese.

Yeah,

there's one where there's a black guy narrating over it and saying, you can't tell me this is not bitch.

Yeah.

Wow, brother.

That's what I'm saying, man.

Cafe, but I also like it's cafe.

All of the ribs.

So this is a popular sound in.

And you said you're from Malaysia?

Yeah, yeah.

That's not...

In Vietnam, it would be NG something.

Okay.

And NGA, N-G-U,

Y-E-N, Win, right?

But in Malaysia, Singapore, and Hong Kong, you will see NG.

N-G.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's confusing.

No.

Ung, Ung.

Ung, Ung.

Ung.

Yeah.

Yeah, I went to Malaysia one time when I was a student.

Oh, shit, really?

Yeah, we went to.

What's the capital?

Kuala Lumpur.

Kuala Lumpur.

Yeah.

For what?

I just was a student on this thing called Semester at Sea.

It's like a floating school.

And one of the stops was over there in Malaysia.

So we took a boat, like a boat over there.

Like a cruise ship.

It's like a, like a, like a, pull it up.

That's a long trip, man.

Oh, it's a long trip.

We left out of Vancouver,

Canada.

That's how I got here.

From the same boat, I think.

Oh, really?

Yeah, I just crawled on to your...

you know, your boat without a visa.

Oh, yeah.

Welcome.

That's how most people are getting in, dude.

That's...

Semester at sea.

We are not the best tourist destination, though, Malaysia.

You know, we are like a little, tiny little country.

We live well there.

The quality of life is pretty good, but we're not like a big tourist place.

Yeah, I think it felt like that.

I think it felt like the beaches and then kind of what do we do here a little bit?

There's nothing to do there.

You just eat and live, live your life.

But are, so don't forget this, are Malaysians the most vain?

Who's the most vain?

Koreans, man.

Is it?

Yeah.

Like Korean Koreans.

Not Bobby Bobby Lee Korean you know Bobby Lee's he's I think I was born here right he's Bobby Lee yeah there's undeniable that guy does not have a birth certificate that's legitimate you know what I'm saying yeah he probably he's obviously a POW you know yeah he has a very POW energy that's true and you have a lot of trauma I think yeah you have a lot of burn marks on his back too Oh really?

Yeah, from cigarettes, I think from gambling issues, but people say different things, you know?

Yeah, but I think Koreans are the vainest Asians, man.

They have a whole skincare.

They're known for skincare.

Korean country is known for skincare and plastic surgery.

Oh, really?

Yeah.

Bring up some of that Asian skincare.

It's lots of stuff, man.

They put snail, that snail juice.

You know, when a snail crawls, it leaves behind like a trail of goo.

Yeah.

They put that shit on their skin.

No way.

Look at that woman.

She's like glowing.

Look at that.

Oh, they got some porch lamp Asians over there.

Yeah.

Yeah, that's why I think they already, some people look dead already because they just are preserved.

Yeah, preserved well bring up that snail juice thing.

I want to see that.

Can we get something about that?

You have to google snail mucin m-u-c-i-n.

Yeah, that's why I have a I have a joke about this that I do in my act that it's hard to find Asian pedophiles because you know they all look like they're 12, but they're actually 35.

Why would you take the risk on an illegal one?

Oh, yeah.

You'll find you're just molesting yourself.

Yeah, just molesting your people.

And then you're like, oh, shit.

They look 16.

Advanced.

Yeah,

that kind of thing.

Advanced Snail 96 Mucin Power Essence.

Lightweight Essence, which absorbs into the skin fast to give skin a natural glow from the inside.

This essence is created from nutritious, low-stimulation, filtered snail mucin to keep your skin moisturized and illuminated all day.

Wow.

That's good marketing writing, right?

Yeah.

I don't know how real it is.

How do you know it's actually snail mucin?

Yeah.

You know, it could just be water and sugar and cornstarch.

Oh, yeah, they could have anything in there.

Yeah, we

don't do that kind of shit.

I think that's yeah,

I think they dairy

Asian right there.

No, it's a white woman doing it.

Yeah, but we learned it from you guys.

I mean, that is cheekbones sashimi.

That's true.

That's true.

We bring a lot to the world.

Oh, that's so wild.

So that's a real thing that people are buying this.

And how much does it go for?

Give me how much for a quarter of it?

Oh, CVS has it.

No, go get something.

What, really?

$24.99.

$24.99 for 0 for seven and a half ounces, huh?

Yeah, you don't need it.

You have good skin, man.

I'm okay, but you know, everybody wants to do a little bit more.

But how do you even farm it out of them?

Do you follow right behind them with a little scooper?

I don't know, man.

Maybe they just have a whole cage full of snails.

Oh, and maybe it's like a deflorescent just drips down into a bucket or something.

That's correct.

I haven't thought of this.

Forcing snail to release mucin through harsh treatment, like dunking them in saltwater.

No way.

That's very mean.

This was probably taught by a lot of the

forces in Vietnam.

Some of this is illegal.

Some of the, go back to it.

Some of this, this is considered waterboarding.

I think snail mucin, a popular skincare ingredient, is collected from live snails through various methods, some more humane than others.

Traditional methods involve forcing snails to release mucin through harsh treatment, like dunking them in salt water or chemicals.

It's like killing a whole family just so someone can have like smoother skin.

Oh,

many companies now use methods like gentle stimulation or allowing snails to naturally excrete mucin on mesh nets, ensuring their well-being.

Wow.

What's gentle stimulation for a snail, you know?

I think just a little

fingering action on just petting?

Petting?

Heavy petting, maybe listening to some.

What's a popular Malaysian

love musician?

We don't really have that.

You can use an American musician.

Marvin Gaye, I guess.

You can play some Marvin Gay.

Some Malarvin Gay.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, if we had some Malarvan Gay.

Yeah.

And we played that, that would be beautiful.

Let's get it on.

Yeah.

And you're just touching that snail's back.

Yeah, yeah.

A few snails, not just one.

Yeah, it's true.

You can't just four play with one snail.

Yeah, that's weird.

They move too slow.

Yeah, yeah.

You got to get a little batch.

It's like, you know, how that chess movie where the one person is playing against 10 chess masters plays you against 10 snails.

It's almost like one of those,

it's like that thing where those things are dropping and you're catching them, you know?

Yeah, yeah.

I like it.

Nigel, good to see you, man.

Good to see you too, man.

Thank you for all of the entertainment, man.

You definitely

make too many videos, man.

That's the life of a YouTube person, you know.

It is, huh?

Yeah.

I got my start.

I started doing doing stand-up 2010, 2011.

You got a special that came out a few years ago, right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I did release it on Moment House.

Yeah.

Have you used that platform before?

You just sell tickets, people buy it, and they watch it.

Uh-oh.

Yeah.

But I'm going to whack it on my YouTube eventually.

Moment House?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Is it live performance on Moment House or is it you just tape it, put it up, and then there's a premiere?

Yeah.

Yeah, something like that.

I think Andrew Schultz did it here.

Oh, yeah, that kind of thing.

And you started, so did you, were you born in Malaysia?

Yeah, yeah.

I was born in malaysia and then i went to lived there for 20 years of my life then i went to university i went to northwestern in illinois near chicago oh yeah yeah and then i then i moved to the uk for a few years for eight years and i'm back here in la

what are malaysian because i don't know a ton about the malay right yeah yeah i wouldn't either really you don't uh you know you have So many different races there, you know?

In Malaysia.

Yeah.

There's Chinese Malaysian, which I'm, I'm, I'm that.

Malay Malaysians and Indian Malaysians.

And we don't really make.

So pretty segregated, you know.

Really?

Yeah.

So there's beef between what type of Malaysian you are?

There's no beef.

We just don't really care as much if you're not part of the group.

Oh, I see.

But it's very peaceful.

It's very peaceful.

Yeah.

So it's not violent, but it's still like, you just kind of stick with your tribe.

Yeah, yeah.

We try to venture out, but you know, sometimes it's hard.

They eat different things and there are limitations to what Malays can eat, you know?

Oh, Malaysians can't eat everything?

Yeah.

Well, Malay Malaysians are.

They're Malay Malay.

They're Muslims.

Muslim?

Yeah.

So they they can't eat pork right and also in in malaysia uh certain restaurants need to be halal certified for malay people to to eat in if you if a malay person is caught eating at a non-halal restaurant depending on where you are it could be you know you could get into trouble basically yeah so there's that that those little things but we overall we're pretty peaceful and we like each other you like each other but every now and then there's a little bit of mongolian beef with each other

yeah i feel that i've had that yeah yeah It's okay.

It's okay.

It's bad.

It's American Chinese shit.

It's travesty.

It's something you just, it's something you fill your jaw with while you look at through Target.

It's nice at an airport.

You know, you get an airport Panda Express.

You know, it's the best thing there.

Yeah, it's good.

But it's a lot of sugar, though.

Yeah, sugar is good.

But sugar, yeah.

I like sugar.

Come on.

I like it, but I just know it doesn't.

I know it's secretly plotting against me.

That's what I feel like.

Really?

Sugar is plotting against you?

Well, I feel like it gets in your system and it knows it's going to win.

Because it's like a deteriorant, deteriorant.

Deteriorant.

It deteriorates you.

Yeah.

Well, most things do, though.

Most things that taste good are deteriorants, you know?

Cholesterol, fats, butter, olive oil.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Even vagina.

That'll ruin your life.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That it takes up, it ruins your time, really.

Just chasing vagina all the time.

And I'm glad I'm out of that phase of my life now.

Yeah, that's what I heard.

I heard that you got married.

You're married a couple years now.

Well,

I'm engaged a couple years now.

But I'm getting married in July.

Oh, you're getting married in two months.

Yeah.

No way.

And so is this a traditional Malaysian wedding?

No, no, we're doing it in Europe.

My fiancé is American.

She's from Miami.

Well, South Florida.

Okay.

And was it scary for you to choose a fiancé?

How had dating been like for you in your life?

Well, I've been married before.

Yeah.

Married young, divorced young.

Do you have to?

I recommend that.

Get that out the way.

That's my fiancé.

YouTube's

right.

YouTube's Uncle Roger shares photos from engagement shoot with fiancée Sabrina.

Aw, beautiful couple.

Yeah.

She's cute.

Oh, kind of cute.

And I did well.

So

I got her.

I was like, lock it in.

Can't do any better than that.

That's when men lock it in.

They're like, this is it.

Yep.

She's nice.

She's hot.

She's smart.

All right.

Let's do it.

Way better than the previous one, you know?

Oh, really?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

No, the previous one she was fine but she just end up uh grew apart you know didn't fit well i was really doing stand-up hardcore at the time and it just takes a toll on your relationship oh yeah you can't have a relationship if you're doing stand-up i think it's impossible you know because also the hours that you're out it's very like um and i had a day job too so i was like nine to five at the day job then i was doing this all this in the uk so after after my day job finishes i'll just take a long train up to birmingham or something the middle of the uk from london two-hour train do my set, come back, arrive home at one.

All I see her is sleeping.

She just sees me sleeping.

I see her sleeping.

And then seven years later, hey, we're not the same person anymore.

Okay.

Who would have guessed?

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, we're awake.

Yeah, we're awake.

And I don't like you when we're awake.

That's some issues with a lot of marriages, I think.

Yeah.

Go to bed.

Yeah.

I like you more when you're unconscious.

In Malaysia, is it popular?

And sorry, because we've never had a Malaysian guest.

You should get Ronnie Chang next.

Oh,

I've messaged about it.

He's so funny.

We got to do it.

He's Malaysian?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So some people are keeping secret then because I didn't know that.

Yeah.

But I would love to see.

In Malaysia, I just want to learn about a little bit of the tradition of the place.

Okay.

So

do you have to, is it arranged marriage or what is dating like that?

No, it's not arranged at all.

Okay.

Yeah.

You got to find someone.

We got incels there too.

You know, arranged marriages would be a great solution to the incel problem, wouldn't it?

And when incels, you say, what do you mean, people?

Incels, you know, like gamers or whatever?

They can be incels, some of them.

You know, there's a whole movement, isn't there?

The Reddit people, the

blue pill, red pill, black pill, something pill.

The incels who they can't get laid and then they start hating on women, that kind of thing.

Yeah, yeah.

But no, no, in Malaysia, it's all arranged.

You have to arrange it for yourself.

Yeah, their gamer tag is like, these whores are ruining everything.

6,000 or whatever.

Thailand to sleep with some hoes you know yeah oh that kind of thing yeah but that's not we don't really have that either that's why i'm saying in malaysia there's not much to do in thailand there's that there's beaches there's the the red light district bali there's beaches and you know other other places have other things vietnam has the

beaches and

beaches and hoes really all of asia really except for malaysia so we're a bit boring and why is there a different do they outlaw that kind of stuff there so they must have because it it seemed like you would just keep a stricter

yeah why don't they have that prostitution and stuff like that and or just put some people to say hoes fun hoes yeah fun money hoes it's probably the religion thing it's majority muslim okay malaysia so maybe that that's frowned upon a little bit more i'm sure you can find some maybe some like

sugar baby type arrangement right yeah but

secret hose secret secret hose oh there's there's an app for that i think it's called sugar book sugar book yeah look it up it's a big app in asia and i

I know this app exists in Malaysia.

So it's like a dating app.

But, you know, where romance meets finance.

There you go.

Where romance meets finance.

Oh, definitely.

I mean, what about $40

a week?

It goes far, man.

It goes the money.

US dollar goes far in Asia.

Dude, what if our podcast, we sponsored a couple of sugar,

we booked some sugar.

Let's book some sugar.

It's a deteriorant, you know?

It is.

Slowly call away at you.

Oh, definitely.

I can see it ruining a lot of things.

How many episodes of a pod you put out a week is going to get that number way down, man.

But what if we book some sugar, right?

Yeah.

And we just support it, and every now and then they just check in.

But they don't have to do anything sexual.

We have them maybe get a good hobby.

Yeah.

Maybe help around the neighborhood, clean up, pick up trash or something.

That would be nice.

I'm sure they'll be down.

This is safer than, you know, you know that the OnlyFans model who fly to Dubai and they get shat on?

Yeah.

You know, that Sugar Book is a safer alternative, you know?

Oh, I'm a huge Sugar Book fan all of a sudden.

Yeah.

I think it's good.

But I do, I would love to look into, Nick, maybe the price of if we could sponsor a couple of good

women

sugar girls.

I think a grand a month.

Ooh, that's a lot.

Yeah.

That's a lot.

I mean, you said it goes far over there, dude.

I'm talking 80, maybe 120.

Okay, you would get a different quality of woman for 80.

But that's a good week.

But would it be great to sponsor that lady, let her just say, hey, take the week off.

Yeah.

Go relax, go for a run or something.

Okay.

Yeah, that would be good.

Sign up for something.

That would be great.

And we could support the infrastructure over there.

Yeah.

Is family big over there?

Is that like a big thing?

What's it like there that you notice that's different between Malaysia and US or UK culture?

I think it's really the difference between Asia and the West, really.

Family is big.

People live with their parents and it's socially acceptable to do that.

Right.

And then when the parents get old, we don't really send them to homes.

You know, we bring them into our own home.

Oh, yeah.

Instead of sending them to a nursing home, it's better, huh?

It's nice, I think.

Yeah.

But what I like about the West is

everybody is so confident and they have an opinion and they're not afraid to express it.

And sometimes in Asia, because we are taught a little bit more, just obey, obey, obey, you don't really have that confidence and that assertiveness.

And sometimes that doesn't work well here.

If you're an Asian person in the West and you have a corporate job and you just keep to yourself, you miss out on promotions because

you're just not, you know, speaking enough and not bullshitting enough and not, you know, building that social relationship enough.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And do Asian people want to say more?

Like, do they have a feeling inside of them where like, I want to speak up, but I don't think it's appropriate?

Or is it I'm afraid?

Or it's just not part of their

capabilities, natural capability?

I think it's all those things.

I think it's cultural.

It's like, I'm afraid.

Why don't I just mind my own business?

You know, put your head down and work hard.

But sometimes that doesn't work out well.

You know, you can't just put your head down.

You got to put your head up and look at the world and talk some shit.

Oh, yeah, dude.

That's what stand-up is, right?

Yeah.

Oh, you have your head down for a half hour.

Somebody will start fucking you around here, you know.

Yeah, it's a dangerous area.

Have your head down.

Oh, yeah.

Some freaking Narcan monkey will start freaking jacking you from the back over there, you know.

Yeah, so it's it's definitely, you got to have your head up, man.

Yeah.

Is there something do you think that Americans could do to better support Asian people?

Like to like, like ask more, like, is there something like, you know what I'm saying?

Like, because sometimes there's never this communication about how culture should interact, and we're all just left to figure it out.

You ask me like I'm the leader of all the Asians.

But you can.

The door has been open for many moons.

Anybody can come.

Anybody.

I mean, just come legally.

I hear they're cracking down on that a little bit you know yeah just wipe your phone you know

wipe your phone before you come uh i what what can you do honestly i enjoy living in la because i feel like the asian food here is probably some of the best in the world maybe new york is better i don't know but here i just drive 20 minutes to san gabriel valley and that's all the chinese and taiwanese people and there's koreatown a 10 minute drive from me then little tokyo you just i like that that just don't fuck with us let us do our thing okay and everybody's happy you know?

Just enjoy.

Just enjoy.

Enjoy our food.

Enjoy the food?

Yeah.

It's great food.

Yeah, it's a lot of good stuff.

It's not like when I do the Laugh Factory, they just don't let me on because I'm Asian.

So I feel like I get the...

No, no, no.

They don't do that.

I get the same opportunities, I think.

It's so unorganized over there.

It seems like.

I hate to say that, but

everybody's been saying it.

They've been good to me.

They've been good to you.

I like the audiences there because it's like you get such a tourist crowd, right?

So I feel like I'm playing to all of America, you know, know, West Coast, East Coast, middle,

everywhere, the South.

And I think if a joke works there, you know, you can take it on the road with you.

Yeah, it's a good point.

I think one thing that makes it tough in there is the lighting, the way the lighting, like the whole room is kind of lit up.

Yeah.

And so I think it creates an ambiance there sometimes where the audience is more involved in the show.

That's true.

You can see everyone.

Right.

And then they feel like they're supposed to be involved because they're kind of not protected from this, like the, you know, because usually the audience is kind of in the dark.

Yeah, I see that.

that and so asian families uh malaysian families a lot of times you'll live at home um yeah it's common yeah more common than here it's cool man and right now in la hopefully you know if things go well i can buy a slightly bigger house with an adu then fly my mom over you know let her stay with us for what is it a few months oh like a adus like a what additional dwelling unit okay so like a separate guest house like a casita or something a casita yeah the accessory accessory dwelling unit secondary residential dwelling unit located on the same lot as a primary residence.

Yeah.

And so essentially a smaller, separate living space.

So a smaller house for the mom and the mother-in-law with their own kitchen.

Because Asian cooking can stink up a house.

It's delicious, but during the cooking process, it smells.

It's bad?

It's bad.

It smells bad, but it tastes good.

Why?

What are some of the, is it because it's a lot of, I'm guessing, fish maybe or pepper?

Shrimp paste.

Ooh, God.

Yeah.

And then pepper paste.

And a lot of pork.

You know how you cook bacon?

The whole house smells like like bacon.

Yeah.

A lot of pork, a lot of garlic, shrimp paste, you know, sometimes fermented shrimp paste.

Fish sauces.

Why, but why?

Why?

Why they?

It tastes good, man.

Yeah.

It tastes good.

It adds a different sort of flavor.

It adds this thing called umami to your food.

Yeah.

Try it.

Umami means what?

Umami is like.

You know how the tongue can taste like four flavors, sweet, sour, salty, and bitter?

Umami is like the fifth flavor.

It's a meaty, meaty savoriness.

Yeah.

Umami is one of the five basic taste sensations along with a sweet, sour, salty, and bitter.

Yeah.

And is often described as a savory or meaty flavor.

Cheese has a lot of it, you see?

Cheese.

So when you eat pizza, that's why it's so good, you know?

Oh, it is perceived through taste receptors that respond to compounds like glutamate,

inosinate, and

guanylate.

Yeah.

Which are abundant in foods such as meat, cheese, tomatoes, and mushrooms.

Yeah.

I'll bring you around some Asian restaurants.

Food is my thing, you know?

I do comedy about food now.

Yeah, yeah.

Oh, yeah, I know.

I want to get into some of that.

I want to ask you, I'm just trying to get a little bit more idea of Malaysia.

Just of what it feels like to be Malaysia, because you don't hear a ton about it.

And the biggest thing you heard about probably is the plane that you guys.

Yeah, yeah, we're still lost, man.

Is it really?

I still can't find it.

Oh, it's crazy.

What's the word over there?

Bring that up.

Malaysian 370.

What's going on with it?

I think, and the most, I've gone into a rabbit hole about this and also kathleen madigan she's a comic here and she has the best bit if you want like the best stand-up routine about malaysian airlines go search kathleen madigan mh370.

but my theory is the pilot uh wanted to kill himself and so he just because of the way the plane swerved the the plane the path the plane took it swerved past his hometown first before riding off into the indian ocean so he just swerved past his hometown just take one last peek peek.

But by that point, all the passengers on the plane were already unconscious.

Really?

Because of the pressure?

Yeah, he depressurized the plane, but then the cockpit, that pressure stays on for a little bit longer.

So he was just taking one last peek at his hometown and then just driving off into the sunset and ocean.

It's almost kind of

romantic.

That's what I was going to say.

Don't give them any ideas, man.

United Airlines don't need to hear this.

I hate to say this, but it sounds a little bit romantic.

Yeah, let's play one clip right here.

What do we have?

Yeah.

A disturbing reason for the plane's disappearance.

On and off search efforts have failed to locate the plane, which disappeared with 239 people on board more than four years ago.

60 Minutes Australia brought together an international group of aviation experts who say that the plane's pilot crashed the flight intentionally.

Joining me now to discuss this report is CBS contributor and former chairman of the National Transportation.

He looks like he owns stock of that company.

For sure.

And it looks like he probably shorted the

Malaysia Airlines.

He definitely is, dude.

First, the flight path that was reconstructed using military radar.

What was suspicious about that?

Well,

the plan showed that he was going in and out of various countries between Thailand and Malaysia.

One would have thought, based on that pattern, that someone would have sent up some military aircraft to look at them.

But according to the television experts, they said he did this on purpose to evade the military radar.

Well, one of the experts.

That was kind of boring.

Yeah.

What do you expect, you know?

Yeah, what do you expect?

And it's like people like something, it's like hide and go seek.

They never found the guy, and people were just wondering where he is.

We find like a part of a wing every two years.

You know, it's like a little fun little treasure hunt.

Yeah.

It comes up.

I keep track of this, man.

This is that.

This is my true crime.

Oh, it is.

You know, it's the only thing people know us for, and I love it.

But also, in a way, it's almost beautiful.

Like a place so, like,

it almost makes it mystical in a way.

Malaysia.

Yeah.

Oh, thanks.

You know, one, one big, the biggest thing that when my fiancé, when she traveled to Malaysia for the first time, she's American, right?

So the biggest thing she noticed is, she told me she's never seen Muslim people who look Asian.

I would say that is the biggest, not culture shop, but the biggest observation you'll get.

They look like me, but they're Muslim.

Oh, that's a surprise.

Yeah, yeah.

Over in the U.S., you don't see none of that.

No, do you see nothing like that?

Yeah.

Yeah, you see

a lot of people call Muslims slims or whatever.

It's like a nickname.

Slims.

Yeah.

It's like a good, it's like a new, I don't want to say racial slur, but it is what it is.

It sounds like it almost.

One syllable, you know, just.

Yeah, look at these slims, right?

Yeah, look at these.

But I like it.

I like,

you know, Muslims are definitely really interesting.

I've been learning.

Muslims in Malaysia, you know, well, everybody in Malaysia, they're not slim, though.

We are like a fat country.

Oh, it's fat country?

Yeah, we're catching up to you guys.

Oh, fat.

Yeah.

And people die early or what?

How long are people living over there in Malaysia?

Bring up a corpse.

Not a corpse.

Bring up a short website.

Bring up a link.

We love our sugary foods.

We love our fatty foods.

That's why.

People fat dying.

Yeah.

Fat dying.

That'd be a name of somebody I feel like.

Fat dying.

Fat dying.

That's a Vietnamese name.

P-H-A-T-D-A-E-N-G or something.

Fat dying.

Malaysia.

76.

76 years in Malaysia.

What's the American average lifespan?

I feel like you beat us.

Our healthcare system's better, though.

Well, so.

I'll tell you about it in a second.

It might even out.

77.

Oh.

Okay.

So one year longer?

Eight months longer.

But still, enough to point and laugh, you know?

Your final years.

Yeah.

We won.

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What was one of the biggest myths over the years about the Malaysian flight?

Was there something that was like,

did people think it had gone to like a certain place, or was it always just a missing plane?

I'm trying to.

I think there are lots of theories, right?

And some people say they just entered the Bermuda Triangle and they're all still alive but yeah i think i think they're all dead they just he just drove the plane until you ran out of gas and it just sunk into the ocean oh everybody was unconscious though so they didn't have that really scary moment right that's nice i think it's like a less tragic situation than 9-11.

You know, 9-11, they were all conscious.

They knew they were flying into that building.

Yeah.

Right.

And some people were probably trying to hurry up and get their luggage because I hate it when people get up on a plane early before it lands stops or whatever.

Yeah.

You know.

They're they're out ruffling through the overhead story.

Some hurried ass, some business asshole is like, I gotta, I gotta get off first.

It's like, bitch, we're fucking, yeah, we're dead.

Yeah, it's just crazy.

But you can, I hate it when people get up early before the plane is like at the gate, you know?

Yeah, and then the flight attendant has to tell you, please sit down.

The seatbelt light's still on.

Yeah, I know.

Do you fly a lot when you tour around the U.S.?

Oh, yeah.

Or just a big, the, the, my conception, my concept of U.S.

touring is a big-ass tour bus with your face on the side of it.

Oh, no face.

No face?

No, I think that would be too ego.

I think I wouldn't let my face because I don't want people to know like I don't want people coming and looking for me or, you know, you already have at night, they'll have some, if you do a show in a town, sometimes we'll be in a tour bus.

Yeah, yeah.

And see if you bring up.

You can put your face on a different bus.

Also, good idea.

You ride a nondescript bus.

You put your face on a different bus.

Just like the LA City Transit bus.

Just see your face just riding around.

It's just like a Greyhound bus like going through mississippi

it's like follow us to the next show and you get there and it's just a bunch of like people who just got out of prison like

getting off and hamming

his face on a bus yokoy has his face on it have you had him on the pod he's like the other leader of asian people yeah yeah we definitely have had him on your coi special guide special guide yokoi yeah yokoy joseph joseph

Joseph, good guy.

There we are right there with the tour bus.

Yeah, we do like nice.

Yeah, a lot of of times it's just the tour bus but nothing radar nothing really crazy on the inside or outside we run a pretty lean ship for the most part yeah when i was on tour in the us i just flew to every city did you i didn't even go with an opener on tour i would open for myself uncle roger was my opener no you know really save a bit of money that way so uncle roger is your assumed character kind of it's like a um

It's another character, but it's just you.

Yeah, it's just me.

I speak with a stronger accent and I'm a little bit grumpier but you don't we're you're not wearing a mustache or a cape or anything i wear an orange polo yeah that's it that's uncle roger and it just took off because it came you know if you want to see someone uncle roger mostly complains about food right yeah and mostly about asian food like fried rice and and those things and if you want to see someone complain about asian food it better be someone like extremely Asian, right?

That adds the authenticity and the comedy of it.

So that's why it took off the food stuff.

But yeah, he's just me with an orange polo, a stronger accent.

You know, when I, when I do Uncle Rogers' portion in my tour, it's like my old material.

I just let the character do it.

Oh, yeah.

People love it.

That's me.

Yeah.

The orange polo.

But, you know, the bar for character comedy on YouTube is very low.

Just put a shirt.

Just put a shirt.

Holy shit.

Are they the same person?

Adam Ray's Dr.

Phil is higher effort than whatever it is.

Oh, yeah, dude.

It just seemed like the very, the best guy at Home Depot, you know, like a student.

You look like a student at Home Depot.

Oh, thank you.

It's very great, man.

Yeah, people love Uncle Roger and people love learning about different food through him.

I think that's one thing.

Dude, you in Malaysia, there's a, I noticed when I was there, there's a big monkey issue, right?

Depends where you go.

In the city, that's fine.

You probably went to this place called Batu Caves.

It's like a cave, a Hindu cave.

And then when you walk up the steps, there are monkeys who just steal food from you.

Right.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That's something like a monkey issue.

Yeah.

So what I'm saying is, do y'all eat

monkeys?

No, no, no.

I know some Asians do.

Really?

You know, some, I think maybe China's.

I've heard, and I don't know how true this is, but some places, I believe it too, man.

They would just have a table with a hole in the middle.

And then the monkey's head would be just coming through the hole.

And they would just cut open the monkey's head and eat that monkey's brain as the monkey is still alive and just squiggling under the table.

Yeah, yeah.

I don't know how true that is, but I like to believe that we eat everything.

I love that.

Yeah.

I love thinking about a lot of people.

It's a bit inhumane, though, right?

It's next level to the snail muc stuff.

But monkeys are.

They deserve some of it.

No, they're nice.

They're nice.

They're smart.

They're smarter.

Yeah, I agree.

Every now and then you see one who fucking, you know, knows how to open a bag of Dorito or something.

Yeah, they can paint.

Overall.

That's cute too, no?

Put monkeys attacking women for chips.

Well, that's biased.

You can also Google monkeys being cute and loving.

Okay.

Let's see both.

We'll do a video for each.

The woman who was mauled by a

200-pound chimp.

Okay.

That's not a monkey.

That's like King Kong, you know.

I'm just saying this lady probably had a little bit of chips on her.

I watched some monkeys attack a sister for a sack of vinegar salt chips one time on a stairwell.

Okay.

I need to know more context.

You know,

so go to his version now.

What would you want to pull up?

Monkeys being cute.

Monkeys being cute in Malaysia.

Yeah, let's do that.

Okay, let's see that.

Oh, that's a beautiful monkey.

Oh, look at it.

The monkey looks like it's been blackface.

No, okay.

Yeah, we have a monkey problem.

We have racist fucking monkeys.

Look at this monkey, dude.

Wow, bro.

Look at this.

Who is that?

Oh, that's Justin Trudeau.

Look, look.

He's not running for office.

He's swinging for office from his tail.

That is cute.

Come on.

He's not attacking no one.

No, that's a prime minister.

Of course not.

Yeah.

That's hilarious.

Look at this.

Here we have.

Come on.

A beautiful monkey.

Yeah, he's so tiny.

That monkey can't beat anyone.

Very romantic.

What made you decide to go into a food direction on your YouTube, man?

And some of my audience won't be familiar with Nigel or Uncle Roger, and that's okay, right?

But it's the way you kind of effortlessly kind of just like,

I think you seem, this is what it is to me, and this is very judgmental.

All right, here we go.

I'm used to seeing some Asian people be more probably quiet or not have maybe the similar sense of humor.

And I think your humor seems very similar and relatable to just somebody like me.

Oh, thank you.

So, yeah,

and I don't mean it like it's a judgment because it's like, well, what does that matter, right?

But I think that's why it seems so

like your humor.

Sometimes I feel like maybe some Asian humor, I wouldn't get it.

Or even if it's an Asian person with American humor, I wouldn't get it as much.

But yeah, yours just seems so like effortless and comes across, man.

I feel like every family has an Uncle Roger type character, right?

This person who likes to talk shit.

This know-it-all who likes to talk shit, loudmouth person who's just roasting everyone.

Oh, yeah.

I think every culture has someone like that.

Maybe pedophile or none?

Yeah, no, no, pedophile.

Okay.

Keep it, PG.

Okay, fine.

Whatever, man.

I don't know, whatever.

I'm just asking what the question is.

Do they have pedophiles in Malaysia though?

They have a none?

Yeah, of course.

Okay.

Yeah.

They start young.

Sometimes they start young.

Sometimes it's allowed, too.

Oh, really?

They're different cultures, I think.

Sometimes they marry really young.

Like the Burmese or whatever?

The Burmese.

I don't know what specific Asian culture is, but I know of other people who are in Malaysia who would marry a 14-year-old.

It's rare.

It's rare.

And it's very frowned upon and illegal, I think.

I don't know the Malaysian constitution that well.

But yeah, every country has a pedophile problem, man.

It's just that I think in the U.S., your pedophiles are a higher profile.

They're successful pedophiles here.

Yeah, that's crazy.

It's like, well, this guy's great at business.

What's his secret?

And his secret is pet and kids or whatever.

You're like, well, that's, you know, I'll just do a a vitamin D supplement or whatever.

You have a whole island, you know, you have Epstein.

Yeah, we had Epstein.

It's great.

We don't have someone like that.

Asia Consent, Malaysia, 16.

China, 14.

Okay.

Japan, 13.

13.

Hold on.

Lower, Bob.

That's insane, dude.

India, we're getting back to 18.

And South Korea is doing 16.

Thailand, 15.

Legal, 18.

Effective.

What does effective mean?

Oh, all right.

Bahrain, 21.

Wow.

That's old.

Yeah.

Pedophiles need to move away from Bahrainian pedophiles, need to move to Japan.

Yeah.

Blame it on Bahrain, brother.

Wow.

Yeah.

Oh,

why talk about food?

So you got into food, yes.

Your channel seems like it kind of really started to focus more on food.

Yeah.

Well, you know, I grew up, growing up, I think most Malaysians, most Asians love food and we have opinions, a lot of opinions on food and where the best thing is and what is the best fried rice, for instance, you know?

So during COVID,

I remember I went full-time stand-up comedy September 2019.

So six months before COVID hit.

I was like, finally, I saved up enough money.

I got enough paying gigs that I can make a living off of stand-up.

And then COVID hit six months later, I lost all my work.

So I had to be like, okay, I have all this time on my hands.

What do I do?

You know, I have this idea for this character in my head.

And then one day, somebody sent me that very first video, the BBC food, this woman making egg fried rice.

And I was just watching and I was just like, this is horrendous.

This is horrible.

So let's put that character idea with this reaction video, YouTube idea.

And then things just took off from there.

So, and I realized food.

is relatable, you know, to Asian people,

to everyone, right?

Fried rice, everybody's had fried rice before, white, Asian, black, you know, doesn't matter what race you are.

Everybody likes it.

Yeah, everybody likes it.

Everybody has had it.

Everybody has an opinion on it.

Is there fried rice krispy treats or no?

Uh, no, we can start one.

That's a good idea.

Fried rice krispy treats for a little packet.

I like that, huh?

Yeah, but it's too sweet though.

Yeah, maybe sweet.

Maybe you can come out with a savory one.

Yeah, that is the BBC food egg fried rice video.

The one that I reacted to.

And what is it?

Yeah.

Who is that?

She, her name is Hersha Patel.

We did a video together.

Wow.

She was just, you know, like a collateral damage.

She was just a presenter.

And the BBC gave her this recipe.

Hersha, she's got her pronouns are heavy in her first name.

Yeah.

Hersha.

Oh, wow.

So she does a lot of bizarre things, you know, like

I would buy her a damn omelette somewhere.

Yeah, she's making the rice.

And so what is she?

This is your,

you know, her?

I, I, yeah.

After the video went viral and she was under a lot of

she got a lot of hate messages about this video?

Yeah.

For making bad rice.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

This is like a Megan Markle

effect or whatever.

Yeah.

Something.

And then I realized my videos where I critique, when I roast celebrity chefs, I critique food, those go really viral.

They do super well.

And then after doing it for a few more years, I was like, okay, people trust me when I talk about food because I try to keep it honest.

If the food is good, I say it's good.

If it's bad, I say it's bad.

So that's why I I think I can make, you know, do some good business in the food world.

That's why now I have restaurants.

I'm renting a cookbook, all that stuff.

And it's fun, man.

It's like fun.

You know, I've done the, I love stand-up still.

I just don't have the time to do it anymore.

And I'm taking a break from it because I realized I wasn't devoting enough time to it.

You know, at most, I could do two sets a week.

And that's not enough.

That's not enough.

That's not enough.

You get, you feel so rusty.

The first 10 minutes of your set, you're getting rid of that rust and you can't really get better.

So maybe one day when things settle down a bit, I'll get back to stand-up because I love it.

It's just that you know, that instant reaction from people.

Yeah, well, it's also, it's you know, it's funny, I think, how if you try, like, was it scary to try your first that first kind of food video?

Because it's interesting for an entertainer, if you're in a certain world or space, right?

It's interesting to then try something different.

You're like, well, my friend does this, and it's really neat.

He does it super well.

But if I do it, is mine going to be okay?

Are people going to perceive it as okay?

Right.

I think that's a big fear.

You know, I have friends that do great sketches, like Shane Gillis does some really great sketches.

Like his Gillis.

Yeah, Gillian Keeves.

Oh, I love that Isis Toyota sketch.

Some of it is just so,

so funny.

And there's times where it's like, I'll think of a great sketch.

I'll write it on my phone.

I'm like, well, if I did that, would it be okay?

Would I be too scared?

But it's like, I think you think like that, right?

It's normal.

It's normal.

It's normal to think like that, but nobody cares, dude.

Right.

That's the truth, right?

But then, I don't know, if somebody saw somebody doing something like a bunch, you're like, oh, this isn't the avenue for them.

But then if you have a good instinct for yourself, you would kind of notice that as well.

Here's what I'm asking.

Was it hard to do that?

Was it hard to just take that leap and be like, I'm going to try this different thing?

Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

You fear, I fear the judgment of every back because back then in the UK, nobody was doing YouTube, you know?

It was just a weird thing for someone to do, a stand-up to do.

People, other stand-ups would be like, Oh, yeah, he's just a YouTuber, you know, that kind of thing.

Yeah, it was a slur, right?

Yeah, YouTuber, yeah, YouTuber, oh, but no hard R on it, YouTuber, yeah, that's crazy, YouTuber, please,

yeah, dude.

Oh, have you heard that song, YouTubers Can Be Gay Too?

Yeah, have you heard it?

No, I'll watch it right.

You gotta hear this song.

It's great.

It's just like a summer bop that's really taking over.

And then we'll get back to this.

What a banger.

This is that banger, bro.

We got to remix this shit for the summer, dude.

Yeah.

Very hard to sing along.

That's in your car.

He can say this in your car.

Yeah, you just say this to your friend.

He's not wrong, though.

They can be gay.

I support this guy.

Yeah.

Hey, this guy has a vote for me, bro.

It needs to be said.

Yeah.

There's too much toxic masculinity in that and N-word community sometimes.

Yeah.

You got to let the air out the tire.

That's what I'm saying, boy.

Sometimes the best seasoning is a little bit of zest.

Yeah.

Who likes that zesty barbecue?

They snuck it in on us.

They snuck it in on us at that zesty barbecue um but let's go back to what you were saying sorry i just anytime i get a chance i love this artist um eaves and so i just want to be able to support him and put out his song that i think is a banger and has not gotten the uh the vibes it should have gotten so far

or and it just needs to be resurrected because it's been about eight years since that song came out um

what is I wonder, does it in Asian culture even, because Asian culture to me, right?

And I know I relate things to culture a lot, but

I think it's played a big role in my life, I think, somehow.

But Asian people seem more reserved overall, right?

We kind of talked about that.

So is that even scarier to put yourself out there in an Asians, like as an Asian, you think, than it would be in other cultures where it's more like boisterous, you know?

Never thought about this.

I think it would be, you know?

In the U.S.,

I think people here like it when you're being creative.

At least they're supportive, you know, like you go, you do you.

Yeah.

People are more positive you can be gay too man you know yeah if you try to put on that that song in malaysia asians can be gay too that's not gonna go far

i think i think in some countries that would be illegal as well oh yeah yeah asians can be gay

muslims can be gay too this dude that song needs a remake in every culture

Yeah, so I just wondered if it was even scarier and what, like, I guess what got you that, what made you kind of brave enough to take that, to take that leap.

Because in my life, I've noticed that the toughest thing is just that first step every time.

Well, I went to university here and that helped.

I went to Northwestern, and it's,

you know, I was very lucky I got a scholarship because it's an expensive school.

But a lot of people who go there are like very upper middle class, mostly white Midwestern kids.

Oh, yeah.

They're all so confident.

And even though they have the exact wrong answer, but they're still like just saying it with their chest.

Oh, yeah.

You're talking about being a Kappa Sig, dude.

I think.

Something like that.

I wasn't very popular with the frat people.

They have their own culture, right?

When you talk about culture, frat is his own culture.

Oh, yeah.

They like to vomit on each other until somebody's secretly gay.

You know what I'm saying, dude?

That's the type shit I'm into.

Type shit, boy.

Shout out, Pikes.

I don't think Pill Gang.

Can you still do those things?

The hazing rituals.

Not just sexual assault, but on people, on your friends.

I didn't know vomit could be a lubricant, but hey,

here's another bush light, Ricky.

Yeah, they're just so, and I see them just bullshit their way through university.

I was like, I need some of that.

I need some of that white male confidence.

Not too much.

You have too much, you've become annoying and entitled, right?

Yeah.

20% of it.

Just a little bit.

Not too much.

Yeah, you don't want to turn into Chet Hanks or whatever.

He went to our school.

Did he?

Northwestern.

Let's go.

Nice, man.

He came to see it.

I was in a black sketch comedy group back in in university.

Chet Hanks and Tom Hanks were at our show once.

And Rita Wilson, Tom's wife.

And they all came to your show.

Yeah, they came to the show.

It was me and a group of people.

Black folks?

Yeah, mostly black folks.

They always need one Asian guy and one white person.

So I was a token.

He was a token.

Yeah.

Yeah.

You got the pass to say the N-word in certain sketches.

You did.

It was cool.

Yeah.

Oh, wow.

They're doing that.

They're doing my life.

At Northwestern?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Hell yeah.

That's what the N stands for, Northwestern, dude.

That's what I'm talking about.

That's what we need more of.

Dude, I've said this for years.

And not for years, but I've said this for almost four months.

If you had,

if you auctioned off the N-word, say somebody's going to say it, right?

Like tonight, Uncle Roger is going to drop the N-bomb at 11 p.m., right?

But you auction it off.

You say, I'm going to donate money to watch the stream.

I'm going to pay.

They say it.

And the money goes towards like a black organization.

Yeah.

I think that would work.

I think that's a good idea.

Yeah.

But do you have limitations in how they say it?

No, I think they just get, they have to say it within three or four minutes.

So they could do like a little bit of a dance ensemble and then say it at the end.

Like da-da-da-da-da-da.

Hard R or no hard R?

I think it's up to them and I think it's at what price level you pay.

Like say Angelina Jolie is going to drop that thing, right?

Okay.

I mean.

I would tune in to watch that.

I think more people would like that than that fucking imagine song that they did a few years ago.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

Imagine words.

That's what I'm saying, dude.

That's what they need to do.

So I'm just saying, because people are always talking about reparations, this, reparations, that.

But you're out here policing people for the N-word.

Organize.

That's a great idea.

And make some money for your community by auctioning it off.

People are already saying it.

Yeah, for free.

Dude, I love this.

We got to do it.

We have a United Nations meeting, dude.

Let's start a Twitch stream, okay?

And tonight,

who would be the best that you would love to hear say the N-word?

And let's be honest, and this isn't a racial thing.

This is just about vernacular and raising money for a community.

I want to see Trevor Wallace say the N-word.

Yeah, because he does not say it.

But he looks like he wants to say it.

Oh, yeah, dude.

Oh, if you tickle him.

Yeah.

I bet he says it in his sleep.

He's asleep talking.

Sorry, Trevor.

Oh, yeah.

He puts the N in Ambient, dude.

You know what I'm talking about.

What's up, Kyle?

Dude, that would be so great.

Yeah, Yeah, I'd love to see that.

Yeah, I would love to see Trevor Wallace.

And then who's someone that's older that I would love to see say it?

Someone who's probably like in a coma or something, but if you could get them to whisper it or something for like an expensive stream.

I'm talking like about a $13, $14 stream.

Who's somebody?

Look up older people in comas, celebrities, or people on their struggling, something like that.

Old people who are struggling.

Put almost R.I.P.

you can put on there.

Ooh, Clint Eastwood.

Oh,

that'll be a legend.

He did it for first.

Huh?

That'd be legendary.

He says it already.

Yeah, he did it for first.

There's like three movies about him almost saying it out there.

Oh, Buzz Aldrin, definitely, dude.

Yeah.

Bro.

Is he the guy who went to the moon?

Yeah, you know, if you're out in space, you got to yell it out there.

Yeah, nobody hears it.

Nobody can hear it.

Only Houston can hear it.

We got a problem.

Houston, we have a problem.

Yeah.

Paul Wall, baby.

I'm the people's champ.

We got a problem, Hughes, and Buzz is racist, clearly, racist.

You don't think a white guy named Buzz was driving in bombs after a few whiskeys

after a few whiskeys and fake trips to the moon.

You don't think he's driving a fucking inbomb?

First of all, if you send me to a fake moon and drug me up and send me to a fake moon, I get one inbomb, man.

Yeah, he could open up for Angelina and Jolie.

But it's just good to think about how you can raise money.

And that's where I'm at.

It's like, you know, are we raising money or not?

Yeah.

I wish we had such a cool like racial slur for Asian people.

You know, we got, we got chink, but it's nowhere near the cultural coolness.

Yeah, I'm trying to think of chop dogs would be good.

But that's kind of fun.

Yeah.

That's funny.

That's funny to say.

Get my chop dogs right here.

Yeah, look up best Asian racial slurs if you can.

Sorry.

That's probably on X, not on YouTube.

Best Asian slurs.

Yeah, at Elon.

We're going to need.

Excuse me, Grok.

Do you know if these slurs are definitely Asian?

Let's just look up a couple.

I don't want to get crazy.

Yeah.

Have you had Elon on the pod?

I have not.

Mama-san mongoloid.

I thought that was for like Down syndrome people.

Not for Asian.

That's just redneck people who don't know how to say Mongolia.

Mongolia.

Yeah.

We have some mongoloid beef.

Look, I ate so much of it, I can't even fucking read that well anymore.

My forehead got bigger after eating some mongoloid beef.

My eyes got sunken in.

Oh, my God.

We got to get out of here, dude.

Dude, you know what you need to do is do a show with my friends over there in Australia when you go.

Which one?

Sean and Marley.

Oh, these guys?

Yeah.

Yeah.

I've done like some reactions to chefs with Down syndrome, and they're great.

They can cook.

These guys are the best.

One of them doesn't have Down syndrome, one of them does.

I'm not even sure, but you go to their home.

The greatest experience I had in Australia was spending time with these guys at their home.

And went to their homes.

Yes.

And you pull up, dude.

It was just unbelievable.

But that would be an amazing crossover.

That's you.

Oh, no.

And they would love to have you there, man.

I've worked with Down syndrome kids before.

I used to volunteer at a Down syndrome

factory or whatever.

And that's a joke.

That's because a lot of this little Asian factory work.

And I didn't think it was funny.

Yeah, the most joyful people.

Oh, just happy.

Dude, you tickle them.

They can't even feel it because they're already feeling that good.

Isn't that crazy?

Yeah.

Is that true?

Yeah.

They're already feeling at a level of being tickled.

Oh, I didn't know that.

How'd you find out about that fact?

Oh, that's the easy one.

Is that a Grok question as well?

That's Grok.

Do Down syndrome people feel tickles?

I'm not with that.

You're going to jail, dude.

You're definitely going to jail.

Did Rocket Money cancel a subscription for you that would have been time-consuming or confusing to cancel?

It did for me.

I was latched on a, I was paying for something bacon box or bacon bundle or something where they just dang hit you with a month full of bacon their first week of the month.

And rock, I forgot about it.

I'm over here just dang.

Whole home smells like pork.

But Rocket Money figured it out and put it to an end.

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This show is sponsored by BetterHelp.

I've benefited from Therapy Jeepers.

I need it and I go to it and sometimes I don't go to it and then I need it again.

I need a good friend.

I need somebody to listen, right?

I think that's something we all need.

There's so much blabber out in the world.

Heck, even me talking right now is kind of putting me out of it.

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That's better H-E-L-P dot com slash Theo.

How's the Middle East trip, man?

I was watching the clip of you doing that show.

That must be a tough crowd, but you did good.

Oh, it's nice of you to say that.

You're being very nice.

That show was hard.

I'll tell you what happened.

So they weren't supposed to be recording the show.

That was part of the agreement, was there would be no recording.

And I get out there, and then there's 20 news cameras.

Oh,

shit.

And so I'm like, well, what do I do now?

Like, I have, you know, I can't just do all my material because then it'll just be out there.

Right.

It's like, and I'm trying to maybe do a special at some point.

And,

and then, so that was a face.

Yeah, those are Thobe's, right?

Okay.

Thobe.

That's Qatar, right?

Qatar, yeah.

Okay.

And it was so cool, man.

But yeah, so I get out there, and then there's an audience in front of me, behind me, and to this side of me.

And half of each one of them can't speak.

English.

They still laugh, though.

I heard laughs.

I heard applause break.

People, I think a lot of them.

They made fun of the Navy.

They loved it.

Oh, yeah.

That part was.

The best part was calling him Ku Klux Sandsman.

That was my favorite.

That was the only thing.

And at that point, I was like, at least, if anything, they flew somebody over here to say that.

That must be a tough crowd.

Just like a corporate crowd, but tougher.

Well, I just didn't expect the camera.

So suddenly everything has to change.

You're like, what do I do now?

I can't, I, you know, and so it was just like this interesting mix.

But then I also like, before I went out there, I was like asking God.

I was like, just don't make it about me.

Let me just try and do my best.

Like, you know, so I, and then I realized it's just, you're over there to have fun.

So we stayed after and took a ton of photos.

And it was cool, man, just to be on the base and see, like,

you know, I've done some military tours in the past, but just to be there and just see what people, um,

just what people are living like over there and what the environment is like over there.

Yeah.

And then we got to, we got to drive across town and all the buildings have bring up like a basic or what's it called?

Common structure

structuring in Qatar.

All of their stuff have like the castle, like you know, that like castles are kind of like that on the top of them.

Let me see.

I don't fully understand.

Like, you know, the rook in when you're playing

rook is a castle.

Yeah, the rook is the castle.

So it has the castle top.

You know how the top of the castle is like that?

Yeah, yeah.

All of their buildings there are like that.

Oh, really?

Wow.

So you'll be driving by a place and you're like, oh my God, is that a palace?

And they're like, that's a KFC, dude every building there has the castling tops and it's all very uniform and there's nothing out of place there's not a tree out of place there's not a curve of a sidewalk out of place nothing's on it's like wow it's unbelievable um yeah they have a lot of money because everybody there gets subsidized from the government if you're a Qatari citizen.

Yeah, but it's impossible to be a Qatari citizen, isn't it?

Right.

It only travels through the mail.

So you can't just,

and you can't just have a baby on the land and it's a citizen.

Yeah.

Can you be gay and marry a male and then get it that way?

Let's see.

That's a great question because you always hear that you can't be gay there or whatever.

And it's funny, they had the secret service there and I kept going up to it.

I'm like, what's your secret?

If you're gay, just say if you're gay.

What's your secret?

You wore your mom's underpants.

Like, what is it?

And every now and then one would slightly show me a gun.

Just like, shh.

Shut the fuck fuck up.

And then that's when I would listen to N-words can be gay too.

Let's play that in their ears.

Pathways to Qatari citizenship.

Citizenship is automatically granted anyone born to a Qatari father, regardless of birthplace.

Oh, interesting.

Children of Qatari mothers and non-Qatari fathers may apply for citizenship, but only under strict conditions are not guaranteed citizenship.

Foreigners can apply for citizenship after at least 25 consecutive years of lawful residence.

Wow.

Wow.

With no more than two months spent outside the country per year.

Oh my God.

With no more than two months spent outside the country per year.

Whereas in America, you could hang your lower half over a fence and drop something over here that's American.

Yeah.

Which is kind of cool, actually.

I think there is that golden visa thing in America now, right?

$5 million or something?

They're giving that away.

I think it's through America's Got Citizenship.

I think Howie Mandel is one of the hosts of it.

But dual citizenship is not permitted.

Applicants must renounce their previous citizenship upon naturalization.

I think that's important.

So you can't be gay.

Oh, wait.

Legal status of same-sex marriage.

Okay.

Same-sex marriage, civil unions, and domestic partnerships are not recognized or legal in Qatar.

Qatari law, influenced by traditional Islamic principles, criminalizes same-sex sexual activity and does not recognize any legal status for same-sex couples.

Cohabitation outside of heterosexual marriage is also illegal.

Wow.

So there's no way for us to be Qatari citizens.

In our next life, I believe in reincarnation.

I'll meet you there, brother.

See you there, man.

Play our song.

What is the

improper way to cook rice just for whites and listeners of this?

That's what I built my whole career off of.

Is it really?

I think the proper way is to just get a rice cooker.

Yeah.

You know, you have one of those?

No, I lived with an Asian girl when I first moved to Los Angeles.

Uh-huh.

She needs to educate you on that stuff, man.

Oh, we couldn't even afford heat.

Sometimes we'd have her turn that on in our room for a little while.

Oh, shit.

But now, now things are different now, right?

You can afford a rice cooker now.

Oh, yeah.

I can have a rice cooker in each room.

Yeah.

You can just be making rice.

You got to have an Asian in each room making rice for you.

That's how much you can afford it.

I would love that.

Little synagogue.

You're the sugar book person.

Yeah.

$80 a week.

Just come make rice for me, girl.

But a rice cooker is great because it just takes care of everything for you.

And when it's done, it keeps it warm.

So you can just press play, go out, do your thing, come back, rice is ready.

That's it.

And it smells good.

It's perfect.

So, no way to do it.

So, doing anything crazy with rice where you're boiling all that, it's kind of ridiculous.

You can just do a rice cooker easy.

Yeah, because every time in the West, okay, here's the difference.

In Asia, you ask someone how to make rice, they're like, rice cooker.

The story's over.

Over here, I ask someone how to make rice.

They give you this long mathematical equation with science and how many cups of water to one to three ratio of rice to water.

It's a whole science lab breaking bad problem.

Yeah, it's like Andrew Huberman making rice.

Yeah, like we don't need that.

We don't need a whole podcast to make one bowl of rice.

Yeah.

You know, so I recommend everybody just get a rice cooker.

You know, make life easy for yourself.

Yeah.

Make it simple.

Just do that.

Do you cook a lot at home?

I only eat two things, honestly.

Which is at home.

Smoothie?

Okay.

I eat one smoothie that has blueberries, spinaches,

walnut.

But that eating, though, that's not eating.

Protein powder.

Okay.

And food with a bread.

Lactose-free milk, a little bit of cinnamon.

Half a teaspoon of Stameets mushroom powder.

Some

ra?

Colostrum.

What else?

Oh, half a teaspoon of algae, sea algae powder.

That's

fine grain, fine grain.

I don't like that choppy shit.

What is what's colostrum?

Armor?

It's something that it's in baby milk.

Is that placenta?

Oh, it's something in baby milk.

Oh, okay.

I love it.

Is it good for you?

I mean, was baby milk good for you?

Probably.

I don't remember now.

Oh, you imagine that?

Yeah.

I need to ask my mom.

Was I healthier when I was sucking in your tit?

Oh, I'm sure I was.

Just look at me now.

Fucking troubled.

I'm fucking spray tanning my back because I'm losing pigment.

God damn, yeah.

Just getting wider and wider.

I love that damn baby milk titty milk.

Where'd you get that?

That looks like an airwan thing, isn't it?

They started dealing it.

I think we actually do.

I think we honestly, I think we even do some ads for them.

But so I mix that together in a blender.

That is my, that's my smoothie.

That's what I have every time.

And then other than that, sometimes at night, about 45 minutes before bed, I'll make myself a

ground beef

quesadilla.

Okay.

Okay.

You got to expand your palate, man.

Give it a try.

I don't want that.

I'll bring you around.

I'll bring you to Koreatown.

But why is it that every time Asians they want to take you somewhere to fucking feed you?

That's the thing, bro.

Yeah, we don't like cooking at home.

Oh, really?

Because cooking, there's so much good food here that cooking at home is almost arrogant.

You think, like, what?

Do you think you can do better than this place?

You know?

So I got to bring you somewhere.

Oh.

Create some, some, some joy.

Let you see some shit.

Um, Fuyo, that's your restaurant?

Fuyo, yeah, yeah.

Fuyo.

Fuyo, it's Uncle Roger.

That's the restaurant name.

Yeah, congratulations.

No, thank you, man.

Thank you.

you.

So awesome.

That's only in Malaysia right now.

Hopefully, you'll expand this concept to all of Asia.

But later this year, hopefully, we also have something, a new concept opening in London.

Really?

Yeah.

Different, different.

Oh, this is the first time I'm saying it to the world.

Shit.

But yeah, we just got the lease for a place in London.

Let's go.

Completely different restaurant name.

Fuyo.

Thank you.

Fuyo is like a Malaysian slang for saying fuck yeah.

Oh, okay.

Yeah, yeah.

Nice.

Fuyo.

Fuyo.

Fuyo.

Yeah, I love that, dude.

So cool.

And when you went there for the first time, did you have to go and help design the actual restaurant?

How did that, how hands-on are you in something like that, right?

Certain aspects.

I came up with a few of the fried rice recipes.

So Fuyo, it's Uncle Roger.

It's a fast casual fried rice restaurant.

Okay.

So you get fried rice as your base.

You can add toppings to it.

Oh, that sounds so good.

Oh, it's good, man.

We are very proud of our fried rice.

And I came up with a few of the recipes.

You know,

this is a a kimchi fried rice.

So I decided, yes, we need some seaweed.

We decide how you want to plate it.

You know, the seaweed on the side and the perimeter

and how you want to chop the spring onion.

There are many ways to chop spring onion.

You go to

the front of the way.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's all a little like bright colored and a little

corny from a Western eye, but it...

it works for Asia and we like cutesy things and also a lot of kids like it.

Younger people like it.

Yeah, it's fun.

Also, I think getting younger people to like, especially like younger American people to like, just to try something a little bit different, right?

Yeah.

Like, I think my nephews would love this kind of thing.

Look at that egg, man.

Look at how runny it is.

Oh, that's a good thing.

That's a good decision to make.

You got to make the sides crispy and the yolk runny.

That's what Asians like.

You could add some eggs to your diet, man.

Oh, full, yeah.

And some runny eggs to your quesadilla.

To your

round beef, quesadilla.

I do a little bit of cheese on there, shredded cheese, quesadilla.

And that's real?

That's the two things you eat

every day?

That's the only thing that's for real.

You're not joking.

That's the only thing that's at my house to eat, and the only thing is that's at my apartment to eat.

Oh, wow.

So I have that, put a cheese, put a layer of ground beef, one more layer of cheese.

Take some salt, sea salt, put it on there, top on it.

One napkin over it in the microwave, probably a minute, 15 seconds.

When it comes out, I push down on the napkin to strengthen that cheese and that meat combo, put it all together, make it a team.

Then I'll cut it.

A second I take that napkin off.

I cut it four,

One across, one of the bottom, make four pieces.

Do not let it get too cold, brother.

It gets bad.

I need to open a restaurant here, man.

So

you experience the joy of the joy of eating.

Oh, I would love that, man.

I would love to be associated with your restaurant.

Part of why I took a break from stand-up is because it eats into my dinner time.

That's how much I like food.

It's real, man.

Like you do a show on tour.

I have to sound check at like five and then I'm stuck in the green room and just eating a cold salad.

And then after the show, you just want to drink.

You don't want to eat.

Oh, yeah, you just know what I mean.

Yeah, you're a little bit heightened up, and then otherwise, you're eating at like 11 o'clock at night.

That's never super fun.

No good restaurants still open at 11.

Nothing.

Yeah.

Even if you try to set up something in advance, you know,

it won't stay open sometimes.

But you can order food.

But yeah, it's touring is a hectic lifestyle.

How do you stay fit when you're always eating?

Do you also have to take care of yourself or do you want to get turned into fat?

Yo,

no, I think I got to take care of myself, man.

I wanted my life expectancy to go a little beyond that.

So I just work out.

I try to let my dinner be my all-out meal.

Every dinner is my cheat meal, but every other meal is like a healthy thing.

I try.

I try.

And do you eat breakfast?

Do Malaysians eat breakfast?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

We got some good breakfast, man.

I think best breakfast in the world, we got rice for breakfast.

See, that's the part.

I'm open to it.

I think you just, I would have to give you.

Search this, search Nasi Lama.

N-A-S-I.

Yeah, Malaysian breakfast.

That's the first image.

That's the one we have.

So look at the variety.

Rice, peanuts, the sambal paste, a red paste there, fried chicken sometimes.

What's a sambal paste?

It's like chili shrimp paste.

You know?

I'm getting hungry now, just thinking about this.

And those are sardines?

Those are sardines?

Those are deep-fried anchovies.

Oh, fried crispy.

I feel like the joy of this image is lost on you, Theo.

I could see that.

Yeah, look at that.

It's served on a banana leaf.

Look at how appetizing that is.

You know?

And then look at that one.

The one from Medium.

Yeah, that one.

This is another Malaysian breakfast.

This is more Indian Malaysian style.

See, you have the roti, the thin bread, slightly crispy and airy.

You dip it in that yellow dal.

Oh, yeah.

Ah, man.

Again, it beats any ground beef quesadilla, man.

But in Qatar, they had a lot of beautiful sauces and stuff, too.

Yeah, we love it.

Sauce is what makes life worth living, living, you know?

Add that to your cholesterol

stewie or something.

You're right, dude.

I'm a fucking idiot.

What am I doing?

There's all this great food and I'm eating the same shit all the time.

What a fucking loser.

Yeah.

Yeah.

We should make a video.

Do you like maybe next time?

Maybe you can make Uncle Roger your meal.

And then

snack, dude.

I'm fucking losing my mind, bro.

I got to get it together, man.

And we'll bleep that word out.

Sorry, that was a little bit out of sorts.

And the shirt you're wearing, too, that's the national flower of Malaysia.

You want to know more about Malaysia?

That's a hibiscus.

Is it?

Did you wear that for me?

To show respect, yeah.

Oh, thank you, man.

I'll take it.

Look at that.

Oh, that's beautiful.

Yeah.

We have a lot of respect for Asian culture here.

Thank you.

And I think we want.

Yeah, that's Japanese, but you know.

It is?

Yeah.

That's my.

Hajimi mashite.

Huh?

Hajimi mashite?

I don't know what that means.

I know one word.

Oh, our friendship begins.

That's what it means in Japanese.

Thank you.

I love the way they say thank you in Japan.

They just

bow at you.

The most polite Asian people.

I know.

You know, have you been there?

Have you toured there?

Beautiful.

Yeah, I've been to Japan.

I haven't toured there, though.

Oh, you should tour there.

I think you'll get a good crowd.

You think so?

Expat crowd.

Yeah.

And then maybe a few like random Japanese people who got lost.

Yeah.

Saw a sign.

I like the haircut too.

It just ended up with your show.

What?

yeah dude the thing of

let's what are some of the like some asians get no credit the laotians right yeah

laotian people yeah never met they i i pissed them off one time did you because i said uh what did i say oh uncle roger said uh cambodian and and laotian food is like a shit version of thai food and they get mad when you insult their food man yeah laotians yeah laotians and cambodians oh i still think it's okay maybe not lao but cambodian food yeah it's kind of true in a way I think

Thai people perfected that region's food.

You think so?

Yeah, because they took inspiration from the Laotian people, their own Thai people.

And Cambodia, you guys bombed them to shit.

So that's why they couldn't.

Yeah, that's why.

It's hard to eat with the bombing.

Yeah, I know.

It's hard to enjoy your noodles when there's a landmine next to you.

Just like,

don't drop the chopstick.

It's going to trigger the explosion.

Yeah, I've been to Cambodia.

Sometimes it makes me sad.

You've been to Cambodia?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Been to

what's it called?

Angkor Wat, that city.

Angkor Wat, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And it's right next to Vietnam.

Yeah.

And is it makes you sad because of just the aftermath of the war there and stuff?

Yeah, aftermath of the war.

And you just see people

who've lost limbs.

You know, because you planted it.

And there's still active landmines there.

So you never, you can't venture, you can't just venture off the path.

You know, the tour guide tells you, don't walk off the path everybody's walking.

You might step on a landmine.

Oh, yeah.

Who Who has that song, Landmine?

Who is that?

Landmines can be gay too.

I dash hands.

Oh, it's Bruno Mars?

Catch a grenade for you.

That song.

Oh, yeah.

That's what I'm thinking of.

Bruno Mars.

I'll catch a grenade for you.

Oh.

But no, that is heartbreaking.

Can you bring that up?

Is that true?

How much landmines are still in Cambodia?

That's heartbreaking.

Yeah, it's your...

And did we put them there?

I think so.

I think what's the guy who, the president who passed away last year, I think.

Joe Biden?

No.

He's still kicking.

He's still kicking.

I think.

Jimmy Carter.

Oh, Jimmy Carter, yeah.

Jimmy Carter.

Was he the one who there's

somebody?

I don't fully know the history.

I just know that you guys were

highly responsible and fucked up.

I'm sure.

Let me see.

Millions of landmines.

Cambodia is one of the most heavily landmine contaminated countries in the world with estimates ranging from four to six million landmines and unexploded ordnance scattered across the country.

As of the end of 2022, Cambodia had identified 681 square kilometers of land contaminated with anti-personnel landmines.

God,

new areas of contamination are continually being discovered, making the precise number of landmines difficult to determine.

Click on that third article over there, human progress.

On February 2025, Prime Minister Samdetip De Hun Minet.

Samdette Hip De Minute.

How do you say it?

I don't know.

Oh, damn.

Yeah.

Highlighted the remarkable achievements in Cambodia's ongoing mine clearance campaign over the past 32 years.

Since its inception in 1992, the initiative has successfully cleared nearly 3,300 square kilometers of landmines.

Man.

Yeah.

They have more landmines than you have, like, Starbucks is here.

Yeah, but I mean, it just puts hopscotch on a whole new fucking level, huh?

Yeah.

Advanced hopscotch.

It's high-stakes hopscotch.

Let's draw the lines.

Good luck.

Dude, this is horrible.

It's like a squid game over there.

Hopscotch squid games.

All you need is like a simply safe camera set up on a tree over there to get your squid game season three.

Oh.

What is this?

What Asian have the most like?

A lot of Asians squint when they look, right?

Yeah, yeah.

Which Asian have the most.

Not every race squint when they're look.

Come on.

You squint when you look, too.

Oh, yeah.

I look a little Asian, man.

Yeah, you got a little Asian in you.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And what, but but what Asian have the most squint?

Is there one that, like, what Asian has the one where you just want to put a couple quarters in their face?

You know what I'm talking about?

Type of shit, you know?

The squinty eye, the squintiest Asians.

I don't know.

Maybe Mongolians because

they have like really puffy cheeks.

Oh, so that it's a.

So it just pushed the cheeks, push the eyelids up, maybe.

That's beautiful.

I love that.

Yeah.

Squintiest.

Let me see what you search.

Let me see the Google search.

Yeah, show the search.

I mean, that's going to get us in trouble, dude.

Oh, man.

I would love to be on this brainstorming session when you guys had me on yesterday.

Brainstorming session.

Nigel's coming.

What can we ask him?

I don't know.

Ask him.

We were afraid to say your name out loud.

Case this place is bugged by the fucking Memphis PD, dude.

Yeah.

That's another Grok question.

Yeah, bring it up on Grok

as well.

See if they can help us.

Some people say Japanese people because the blast was so bright

that they had like a permanent sunglasses.

Well, it like it was a lot for the community.

It's all heartbreaking, man.

Oh, it's a stereotype tied to East Asian.

It's not a stereotype if it's kind of true, right?

I don't know.

Bring up some wide-eyed Asians in.

Let's see, because this could all be bullshit.

So when I film myself on camera, I have to make sure the camera is positioned a certain way if there's an emotion I want to convey.

Because otherwise, when I look down, it's just a slit.

Yeah.

You know, so I know I experienced that problem.

Oh, this is some beautiful.

Yeah, I think this is a stereotype, man.

We might want to get rid of that stereotype.

I don't know if that's true.

I think it's true, man.

What are common plastic surgeries that some Asians get in order to adjust them to the business?

Make their eyes bigger.

Make our eyes bigger.

Yeah.

Oh, look at the one lady's got one eye big and one eye regular.

Look at that.

Second row, left, left.

Oh, that's makeup.

Nuh-uh.

And I think contact lenses.

Let's see.

Let's play it.

Let's play it.

Yeah, that's crazy.

Asians bring catfish to a whole new level.

Yeah.

It's like one of those Rorschach church.

No.

Search like crazy Chinese makeup and you'll see it on TikTok.

But the beauty of it is

how artistic that Asians are.

Yeah, but it takes ages.

It takes so much time out of your day.

Yeah.

Aegeans, they call them.

Yeah.

Look at this woman just transform.

Yeah.

Oh, she unputs a fake nose on to make the nose slimmer.

Oh, look at this, huh?

Oh, it's Rob Schneider.

This is a joke, Rob.

Wow, this is really.

This is what Jeff Bezos's wife does, you know?

This is crazy, bro.

This really happens?

I think this is a rare case, you know.

Yeah.

Oh,

Rob, though, getting close, dude.

Yeah.

He's the after.

That's almost L.

King, at least.

Yeah, he's the after, bro.

Rob just performed down in Louisiana.

It was pretty cool.

What

else can we talk about real quick?

How many episodes do you put out a week?

Three, four?

No.

No, no, no.

One or two.

One or two.

We put out six a month ah okay so that's kind of where we're at um

in the space right now it's interesting because you know over time you start thinking like

well you start learning more stuff so then there's more stuff you want to talk about right and then you start thinking well i want to you know if people are listening i want to introduce them to things that i like that i think are neat you know or people that it's like oh maybe they wouldn't know about you know yeah like if half of our audience doesn't know about you and they listen and they love you like i've had a great time chatting man It's been very fun.

Same, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

And I was like, kind of worried.

I was like, I don't know what it's going to be like, but

you're hilarious, dude.

Thank you.

Thank you.

So funny, dude.

And so I'm like, yeah, I think it's just things like that.

And then I would like to be able to learn more stuff, like have people in to

learn more.

You know, we're trying to have a healthcare, like a doctor from Gaza who's been in, like, over there.

Come on.

We're trying to have somebody come on about dopamine and like the effects of like dopamine addiction and kind of where we are as like, especially as men, you know, being addicted.

And then

always jerking off.

We always talk about that kind of stuff.

And if we can get better.

You got to get that guy who's trying to live forever, the Brian Johnson guy.

Yeah, we saw that guy.

Yeah.

I'm fascinated by him.

He's almost Korean, huh?

Yeah, he looks like it.

Everybody turns Asian after a while.

Ariana Grande.

Her latest look is Asian.

Oh, yeah.

Acean, they call it in some places.

Aceana Grande.

Aceana Grande.

Yeah, look at this guy.

Definitely.

Yeah, he's turning into a K-pop star.

Oh, play our song again real quick.

It's no bedtime.

It's no bedtime.

Yeah, this is crazy, man.

And do Asian people think like they want to live forever?

Is that more of an American thing?

I think it's an American thing, man.

We accept our our fate, you know?

Really?

But that's what I like about you guys.

You think you can change things.

And sometimes you can.

You know, maybe he will live forever.

But I have so many relatives who are like old.

And given how annoying they are, I don't want them to live forever, man.

Like, imagine if you're this annoying at 70.

Imagine if you're 700.

Oh, how annoying would you be?

Yeah, the worst.

Yeah.

That's part of the reason why I want to do my wedding in Europe.

So hopefully none of them can come.

It's too far.

You have a hip replacement.

Oh, dude, definitely.

Because a lot of the air travel will really wear on some of that metal.

Yeah.

They can't even walk through the TSA.

They start beeping.

Yeah.

They need.

Yeah, I'm trying to think about Asians.

In a sense, the thing you want to do with your channel, introducing people to more things, that's kind of the same with what I want to do, especially for my food, because food is so tied to culture.

Right.

So there are a lot of videos where, sure, you know, a lot of them is me roasting celebrity chefs, but there are also a a lot where Uncle Roger travels to a place.

Like my recent one, I went to Thailand and I got someone who lives there to show me Mark Weens, another big food.

Oh, and you ate at 6.30 a.m.

You ate in the morning.

Yeah.

Thai green curry in the morning.

Oh, the best I've tasted.

So good.

And I feel like a lot of the times when Western people go to Asia, they always show the weirdest parts of what Asian people eat.

Yeah, like come eat these cat nuts or whatever, huh?

Yeah.

So I feel like me doing this is kind of like almost like an insider view of Asia compared to like a Western perspective of Asia.

And I feel like that's my little contribution to the internet.

Hmm.

Yeah.

Oh, there you go.

Oh, yeah, that's me.

And that's just shit.

That's just a secret curry spice.

I look good.

This is a high-effort podcast, man.

You got a Photoshop person on board.

Yeah, we got one guy.

But

it's just a secret seasoning you're selling.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That'd be great.

That's a chili sauce.

That's my new chili sauce.

Well, I think Asian food is just expanding in the U.S.

So I'm sure that it's just growing.

Look that up.

Is Asian cuisine growing in America?

It must be a lot of people.

Oh, definitely, definitely.

And there are so many of us globally, you know?

If Asian.

Yeah, yeah.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, you see one Asian, you've seen them all.

That's the old motto.

Yeah.

Asian cuisine is growing.

It's growing in popularity in America.

This is reflected in the increase of Asian restaurants.

Well, that's easy to say.

So it's getting more and more specific.

Oh, sorry.

Please read first.

Go back up.

U.S.

visitors to Asia saw a 33% jump, while Oceania and Central America each saw a 30% increase.

So people just traveling.

Yeah.

Traveling overall is just increasing their palate.

Japan is the gateway drug to Asia because Americans love Japan.

But then when they get there, they love it so much, then you get the courage to explore other parts of Asia.

Thailand, Cambodia, see the landmines, you know,

see the lady boys in Bangkok.

They'll both blow you up.

Yeah.

Yeah.

One's a little nicer, I think.

Yeah, that's true.

Yeah, I think Thailand's been doing the trans thing for a long time.

They've nailed it.

Yeah.

I think.

That's growing too.

Men that prefer trans women.

And bring that up.

How much are people enjoying more trans

sexual work?

The trans people in Thailand are like hot, hot.

They put a lot of effort into their

process.

Oh, yeah.

They're not just these bootleg trans people.

They have pageants.

They have competitions.

Yeah, here we just have some fucking thick ginger running around with a bra on during the streets of New Orleans during Mardi Gras, and he's yelling that he's into something new or whatever.

It's like, bitch, you're not, you're just a fucking some St.

Patrick's Day bear.

Yeah,

you know, these are men right here, yeah, they're all dudes, man.

But what are we if you hadn't told me that, I would be empty in an hour.

I'm just saying, sometimes people just say wiener is just long pussy.

I don't think anybody said that.

I think it's just you, Theo.

A wiener is a long pussy?

I think that's just you, man.

I think it's something you hear if you put your,

you know, if you.

If you really dig the internet, dig deep.

Wiener is just that long Peugeot.

Who won?

The pageant was inaugurated in 1998.

Okay.

Let me get a little bit more of this because this is really fascinating.

Sandra Pimai

Panyakam collapsed to to the floor and shed tears of joy after she was announced the winner of the 25th Miss Tiffany pageant held at the Tiffany Show Theater in Patya on Sunday night.

Sarudu triumphed after failing to catch the judge's eye on four previous appearances as a Miss Tiffany contestant.

Wow.

Miss Tiffany, a nod to the pageant's original goal of promoting human rights and equality for transgender people in Thailand and around the world.

Are transgender people accepted in Thailand?

Yeah.

They are.

Yeah.

So it's a big part of their culture.

It's a big part of their culture.

They've dealt with this shit They're ahead of the time.

You know, I think the arguments people have over here about the trans issue, I think Thailand probably had that 20 years ago.

So now it's just part of society.

They don't even think about the pronouns.

They just get called like she, her, or whatever they want to get called.

So it's nice.

I think we can learn from that a little bit.

For sure.

I think.

Yeah, these people are beautiful.

Wow, this is a that's a young lady, huh?

Yeah, they look good, man.

Hey, it's like, you don't know what you don't know you know don't come on my back and tell me it's raining you know

that's that old yeah wives tale i think you're gonna tour thailand thailand next wow i don't know i don't you're gonna risk finding out you enjoy this I don't know.

You just, you know, you don't want to accidentally bring sand to the freaking wiener beach or whatever, you know?

But yeah, oh no, dude, I think this is great.

But I think the issue that we have in America, and that's just a joke, but I think the issue that we have in America is that you have men using it mostly for sports, right?

It's like if you're going over to play sports and you know you're a biological male, to me, it just feels like you're cheating, right?

We should have

a class that's just for trans people and let them compete there.

Yeah, and let it be a new thing that we embody and embrace.

And that's the thing I would try to start if I'm trans.

Like, don't put me in with men or put me in with women if I'm not exactly as them.

Let me do something new.

I think that's why they have the pageants.

They keep them busy with the pageants so they don't do sports.

Oh, that's a good point.

Oh, yeah.

If you're too busy.

Yeah.

These are actual biological women and they don't look near as good, nearly as good as that.

That's a good point, huh?

Yeah.

Maybe we're coming to a unique time in culture where men are tired of being men so they would rather spend their time looking like women and women are tired of being women and they would rather

spend time looking like men.

Yeah.

They can do whatever they want, man.

I think if you become a woman, that's a benefit too.

You can actually become a Qatari citizen, right?

Oh, I take that.

You can actually be the Qatari male citizen.

Yeah, there's a loophole.

That's a loophole.

I like this, huh?

That's the dessert on the menu at Food Food Fuyo.

It's Uncle Roger, yeah.

The dessert is a secret path to Qatari citizenship.

I like that.

I like that.

One last thing I want to talk to you about.

Oh, you hear a lot about Taiwan and China, right?

Oh,

yeah.

That's got into some trouble there a few years ago.

Just what, talking about it, or what are you doing?

I just had a joke.

If you search Uncle Roger vs.

China, I just did a bid that it works all over the world.

I've did that bid in Bangkok and Toronto and LA.

It works all over the world.

So I kind of just want to gently roast Taiwan and gently roast China.

And then right after that, all my Chinese social media accounts got banned, you know?

Really?

Yeah.

And that was two years ago.

Everything got wiped.

If you search Uncle Roger on those Chinese social media apps, you'll find nothing.

Even though I had like hundreds of thousands of followers before that, really?

Yeah.

And did you have?

Oh, yeah, wow, this has 40 million views, Uncle Roger.

Yeah, it's a YouTube short.

Those things go viral sometimes.

Not this viral.

Oh, God.

This is the most viral thing since COVID out of China.

China.

China, okay.

China, good country, good country.

Good battery.

Good country.

We have to say that now, correct?

Oh, they're phone listening.

Oh, their phone listening.

This nephew got Huawei phone, they all listening.

Tap into it.

Long live presidency.

Long live presidency.

Uncle Roger, social credit score going up.

A niece and nephew from Taiwan.

Not a real country.

Not a real.

Not a real country.

I hope one day you rejoin the motherland.

One China.

That's hilarious, dude.

So is that a real feeling in Taiwan?

Some of them feel like they should be part of China and some people don't.

Yes, it's a very divided thing.

But most people don't want to be part of China.

Taiwan is a very interesting place.

They do not use any of the Chinese social media apps.

They use the Western ones.

They use Facebook, Google, Instagram.

Whereas in China, all those things are blocked.

You know?

And

I released this clip and then everything got wiped from Chinese socials.

And then you remember last year or a few months ago, everybody was getting on RedNote, this Chinese app.

Yes.

I tried re-registering for an account, and the moment I uploaded my profile photo, that whole account got wiped again.

No.

So they, they have some sort of, I'm in some sort of database over there over there.

So.

So China's against you, you think?

I probably can still visit if I get a visa, but I don't know if I want to risk it, you know?

Yeah, and they just probably don't want you having a say in what China is like, they just don't want you having a voice in their country, yeah, yeah.

But, you know, it is what it is.

Sometimes, uh, I think in the U.S., we take free speech for granted sometimes, and we don't forget that not all countries are like this.

In the U.S., you say anything, and the worst thing that happens is people get mad at you, yeah, right, in the comments, whatever.

But in I don't know, I mean, these days, a lot of things get taken down, even in the U.S.

I feel like there's things you can't say.

I think things get submerged, you know, or like what is it called?

Shadow banned.

Shadow banned.

True, true.

But in a stand-up context, I feel we get more leeway.

Oh, that's a great point.

Yeah.

In a stand-up context, we get so much freedom here.

What is the biggest issue over there with Taiwan?

Do you think that they'll remain free?

Because they make some of the most semiconductors in the world, right?

TSMC, that company, yeah.

Taiwan semiconductor.

Taiwan's...

TSMC is the only reason China hasn't attacked Taiwan yet, you know?

Why?

That's too valuable.

China and the United States both view Taiwan's dominance of the global tech supply chain as a national security risk.

In response, they have tried to boost their own capacity to make chips they need.

Yeah, I think they're trying to make more chips in the U.S.

I know that that was something I saw like a couple weeks ago.

NVIDIA's chief says U.S.

chip controls on China have backfired.

Jinsen Huang, who I'd love to talk to, the chip maker's top executive

from NVIDIA.

They're the number one.

They're the leader in chips, I believe, said the attempt to cut off the flow of advanced AI chips spurred Chinese companies to accelerate their development.

Wow.

Lawmakers in Washington have worked for years to limit China's access to the cutting-edge computer chips needed for advanced artificial intelligence, particularly those made by NVIDIA, America's leading chip maker.

And yeah, so what they're these are the chips that are used for AI.

And for some reason, AI weapons, you know, rockets.

Right.

It's just there's, and for some reason, they make them the best over here,

right?

Taiwan has the best ones.

I think so.

So far.

So far.

Yeah.

But according to NVIDIA's chief executive Jinsen Huang, those regulations driven by economic and security concerns have only made Chinese tech companies stronger.

Wow.

Yeah.

I mean, this is the type of thing somebody would go to war over because whoever controls this is going to control a lot of things.

I think this is going over my head, man.

I just, I just, I just buy some Bitcoin to call it a day, you know?

Yeah.

Oh, me too.

I'm just wondering what could happen to the people of Taiwan, right?

I think that's my question is like, do the people there live every day?

It must be weird there every day.

You're going to a factory probably and creating these chips, but knowing that the creation of these chips could have a semblance on if your country gets

attacked or attempted to be controlled.

It has to be very strange, I feel like, you know.

Do you think that makes any sense or no?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

They have this maybe this added responsibility that I better make a good fucking chip, otherwise China's going to ruin us.

Right.

Or by keeping to make these, like, what if we all decided we're not going to make them?

Would they all just leave us alone and we could just be at peace?

No, if Taiwan stops making them, China's going to attack it.

China needs those chips right now.

That's why they're not bombing the factory.

Oh, I see.

So they need them because they're supplying them.

Yes, yes.

So if you stop making it, that would be like, you know, if like a

what do you call it, a bin man, a bit, what a garbage truck person, you know, if they stuck at their job, the whole country gets attacked.

Oh, yeah.

That that would that would be stressful.

Oh, it'd be the worst.

Imagine you work in and out.

If you got the order wrong, Mexico's coming.

Do um, this may be one of my last questions.

Do you think, so a lot of goods from America are made in Asia, yeah, right?

Yeah, do you think that how do Asian people feel about that?

Like, do they take a lot of pride that they make it?

All these like things that go all over the world, do they just feel like it's just a means to an end and there's not a lot of pride in it?

Like, what does that feel like?

Do you feel like, especially probably to China?

China's the place that gets labeled a lot as like making everything, you know?

Yeah.

What What have you heard, or like, what do people say about that?

Does that make sense to you?

Yeah, Malaysia makes quite a few things too, not as much as China for sure.

I feel like to us,

it's a job, and it's a decent job.

And without those manufacturing jobs, those people will have a shittier life.

So I think we like that those things,

globalization.

I think when people talk about globalization, they see from the American perspective.

Yeah, you are losing jobs to the outside world.

But on the flip side, we are we Asians are gaining some jobs that pay better than those jobs that existed prior, like working at a hawker stall selling noodles all day.

Manufacturing shoes probably pays them more.

And I think this is a tough part, right?

Sometimes the economy, I feel it's a zero-sum game, right?

Making the shoe, it's either a job in America or a job in Asia.

We only need so many shoes, right?

So, but We do think it is good.

It helps us elevate our quality of life.

And hopefully, in a few generations time uh the asians will have made more money and then maybe we won't have to do those menial manufacturing jobs anymore but for now it you know it's that's the same thing where there was a news article i think it came out recently a couple last year maybe where in new york they were starting to use um you know like self-checkout lines but then you had a face time video called someone from the philippines the the persons being the checkout the cashier for you from the philippines oh so you had like a you had a zoom call with a checkout person Yeah, yeah.

So the whole internet hated it.

But then from my perspective, it's like the person in the Philippines is probably getting paid way more than any job that she would have gotten, the person that they would have gotten in the Philippines.

And this is, it's just a hard part of it's not an easy problem to solve, right?

Global inequality.

And I think it just takes time, maybe.

And

just the hope is one day globalization will just even the playing field, everybody can afford

the things we need in life, healthcare, a a house vehicle that those things so that's my take on it it's not very funny but hopefully yeah that that's that's the thing oh philippine yeah yeah but no i think that's great i just always wonder like i always think like oh yeah it's just like how i look at it from my perspective as an american i never think like what do these people feel about it like you know

we probably like it to the filipino person sure she's just working from home putting a fake zoom background nothing else clocking in cooking yeah not even cooking she's just checking out the cashier yeah but she could be cooking at the same time, yeah.

She can be cooking for her kids, she'll be home for her kids because in Asia, people work work long hours, man.

There's some, uh, you know, in Malaysia, we have domestic helpers sometimes who are coming from Indonesia and they live with us, right?

So they are just gone from their families three years at a time, and they

they get one day off a week, maybe, where they get to call their family.

So, this

Filipino job, this virtual cashier job, that's like the best job.

That's working remotely, man.

That's being a digital nomad for them.

Yeah, I like that.

I love that shit.

They're doing that in Bali.

I like that.

I like that shit.

But what about this?

So, and I'll say this.

Round of applause for Filipinos.

I want to say that, right?

Yes.

Jokoy.

Doing good job.

Joey did good.

Yeah.

Doing good job.

But I want to say Filipinos, it's funny because...

They're usually the last people you see before you die because a lot of them work in hospice care.

Oh, that's true.

You know, I was wondering where this conversation was going.

Oh, yeah.

It's going up.

When you just see the light, and then there's a Filipino person.

It's just like, well, the light is a little bit blocking the light.

It's a little bit blocked here by like one Filipino person with like a stethoscope, you know?

Yeah, it's Joe Coy blocking the light.

But they often have a lot of the same name, you know, Debid.

Debit.

Debid.

Debit.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

What's another one?

Maria.

Susie.

Susie.

Popular.

Look at a popular Filipino-American names, then we'll get you out of here.

Yeah.

Maria, Christina.

Filipino.

Yeah.

God, I don't want to be when it happens again.

I think they have the biggest eyes for Asians.

They have the roundest eyes.

Full of love.

Yeah, full of love and care.

When you're in hospice, you don't want, you want someone with like big round eyes taking care of you, you know?

Big round eyes.

You ever heard that song?

No.

Oh, I know that song.

Big round eyes.

Oh, yeah, it's about Filipino love.

It's about Pinoy heartbreak.

I think in hospice care, you don't want a squinty-eyed person taking care of you.

They look like they're up to something.

Oh, yeah, their secret, huh?

Yeah.

James, that could be one.

Edward.

Edward, yeah, yeah.

Filipino.

Yeah, a lot of Benjamin.

Benjamin.

Yeah, Benjamin.

A lot of good Filipinos.

God.

Mario is good.

Oh, like Italian Filipino.

Like, oh, Pinoy pasta.

Pizza Ravioli.

Yeah, I would love to be Filipino next time, man.

Yeah, let's reincarnate, man.

Dude, we can come back, huh?

Yeah, I better come back rich, dude.

I want to come back to a kid with rich parents.

Oh, you want to be a kid of rich parents?

Oh, doesn't matter what race.

Doesn't matter what race.

Just kid with rich parents.

But would you attack them?

Would you like Menendez them or whatever?

Menende what?

Like Menendez brothers, the guys that I think they attacked their parents or something because they brought them cold food or whatever.

I haven't looked at it.

I probably would just to get their inheritance, you know i'll make sure they write their will down first yeah just double check the will all right step step step

okay it sounds dangerous yeah dangerous for us

um nigel

thank you so much for coming in man uh we really appreciate your time bring you to some good food sometime yeah i would love to do that and make a video or something i'd love to dude yeah i'd love to swap a uh we got to swap a number or something and uh this has been one of my favorite interviews man thank you so much like sometimes i go into like a day or something i'm sure this happens to everybody everybody, but it's like, How's this day going to be?

And you're like, kind of tired, or you're just been along, whatever.

And then it's awesome, you know.

Thank you.

Likewise, likewise.

So I think that's the power of like people getting together, right?

Because sometimes you need somebody else to make your day better, you know.

And so I just want to say thank you so much

for your time.

And yeah, I hope you do get that extra restaurant opened up, dude.

I think it would be exciting for people to go see and for more people to learn about foods from different parts of the world.

You can check out Uncle Rogers' channel.

He's got a great channel.

It's Nigel, Nigel.

Yeah.

Nigel Um.

And we'll put all the links and everything, man.

Anything else that you wanted to share?

No, that's it.

Check out my channel.

Yeah.

Oh, and best of luck with the marriage, dude.

Let's say one nice thing.

Say one or two, three, or two or three nice things about your wife so that one day she can look back and she'll have this.

What's something

back to the Theovon podcast?

That's true.

That's a horrible thought to say, huh?

So, is that egotistical to say that?

No, no, it's okay.

I think she'll be happy.

She's just,

yeah, she'll love it.

Yeah, what's something nice about her that you really admire?

I think she's a love of my life and she makes every day better.

Whoa, dude, that's gay, bro.

Play the song again, dude.

That's the gayest shit I've ever heard, bro.

God, dude.

God, I regret saying that now.

I regret saying that.

I'm joking, dude.

Shut up.

No.

Okay, you think, shit, you think you found the love of your life?

Yeah, I think so.

Yeah.

That's cool.

That's why people get married, right?

Yeah.

Yeah.

That's a good point, huh?

If you haven't found the love of your life, then what are you just part-time in it with somebody on your heart?

Yeah, situationship.

Just the fuck buddy of your life.

Yeah.

You know?

That's a long haul, man.

Well, congratulations.

Two months to your marriage?

Yep.

Oh, it's exciting.

Yep.

Very few relatives are coming.

It's too far.

Not allowed.

Too far for these old Asians.

Shut them down.

Shut them down.

Yeah, deport them.

Deport them from Europe.

Pull the semiconductors right out of their backs, dude.

We do not need them hitting the air.

Go back to the factory.

To that factory in the sky, dude.

Thank you so much, Azul.

Have a good day, brother.

You too.

need to hide.

Deal games won't really survive.

Tomorrow you might not be alive.

Niggas can be gay too.