Holiday Parties & High School Reunions (ft. Laren)

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Speaker 1 What is up, Daddy Gang? It is your founding father, Alex Cooper, with Call Her Daddy, Daddy, Daddy, Daddy.

Speaker 1 Daddy Gang, welcome back to another episode of Call Her Daddy.

Speaker 1 I am joined today by my lovely best friend, fan favorite lauren mcmullen or as i call her laren hello daddy gang we were just laughing because We rarely do this when we podcast together.

Speaker 1 We've never podcasted with like notes or a laptop, but something came over us and maybe it's because it's like the holiday season.

Speaker 1 We like really wanted to come prepared and give the gift of a little bit of an organized episode.

Speaker 1 It's still going to be a little unhinged, but Lauren and I wanted to talk about Thanksgiving this year together together because what better way to celebrate Thanksgiving than you guys popping on an episode of Colorado and hanging out with Lauren and I.

Speaker 1 I'm so aware that some of you could be alone today. Maybe you fucking hate your family.
Maybe you love your family and you're listening to this with your family. Regardless, we are here for you.

Speaker 1 So let's just get into it. We haven't even talked about this.
What are you going to be doing for Thanksgiving this year?

Speaker 3 So I'm doing two Thanksgivings this year. I'm doing one in Louisiana in the middle of November, and then I'm doing one in Pennsylvania on actual Thanksgiving.

Speaker 1 Oh, wow.

Speaker 3 Wasn't entirely planned to do two Thanksgivings. I've never done two Thanksgivings before, but I guess we'll just rip the bandaid off in the first minute of the episode.

Speaker 3 I recently went through a breakup, and the plan was to spend Thanksgiving with my ex-boyfriend's family.

Speaker 3 So I was gonna do with my own family in the middle of November and then go celebrate with his family on actual Thanksgiving. On actual Thanksgiving.
Okay.

Speaker 3 So now I'm just celebrating Thanksgiving twice with both sides of my family.

Speaker 1 Okay, well, I'm going to be honest. I don't think there is a better holiday to have two of than Thanksgiving because it's just meaning that you're getting to eat really good food.

Speaker 1 So I feel like that's kind of a blessing.

Speaker 3 I'm not like really complaining. What are you doing? What you're hosting and

Speaker 3 that wasn't supposed to be the plan.

Speaker 1 Thank you. Thank you.
I was not supposed to be hosting this year. I was very, very adamant about not hosting.
I think I talked about this on an episode before, but

Speaker 1 I'm a good host, but I really have to be in the mood.

Speaker 3 And I think there's no escape for you.

Speaker 1 Oh, there is no escape.

Speaker 3 And you're like an escape artist at like a party.

Speaker 1 Yes. Like I like to relax and I like to get out when I want to get out.
And I feel like Matt and I have been so busy that holidays are so important to me.

Speaker 1 Like I really, really want to spend time with him and I want to be present. And I know that when you're hosting, you can't really be present with each other.

Speaker 1 Like I'm not going to be sitting on Matt's lap like making out with him and like shoving cornbread in my face.

Speaker 1 Like I'm going to be making sure everyone is like situated and their plates are filled and like we're eating eating last.

Speaker 3 And like, so the people, how did you, how did you get like cornered into this?

Speaker 1 Right, so like, why the fuck am I hosting?

Speaker 1 Yeah, so I think we were first initially saying don't host because we thought like my family was coming too, and we thought it was gonna be like a couple of years ago.

Speaker 1 It was literally like 40-something people, it was fucking insane.

Speaker 1 And we had people inside and outside, and it was just overwhelming. Now, this year, Matt's mom called us and was like, you guys, it's literally just our internal side of the family on Matt's side.

Speaker 1 Like, my family's staying on the east coast this year. So it's going to be smaller.

Speaker 1 So first she was going to be hosting and then all of a sudden Matt and I were like, should we just offer? Like I felt bad because our house is a very good hosting house.

Speaker 3 Your house is very conducive to hosting. You got the inside, you got the outside, you got the outdoor heaters, you got the outdoor bar.

Speaker 1 Ooh, yeah, we definitely set ourselves up to host. So I think we just had a moment where we're like, why are we making your mom do this? Like, let's just fucking take it.

Speaker 3 Once you get over the mental hump of hosting, not that i host many things i feel like once you get over the mental hump then you can kind of start to get cozy and be like well now i get to pick exactly the foods i want i get to pick exactly the vibe and the people and like now you can just like own it and make it exactly what you want no you're right and there was also something about like mentally for a minute thinking that matt's mom was doing it now that it's like I don't know why, but it's something like knowing someone else was going to do it.

Speaker 1 And now it's back on me. I am less stressed than the whole time it had been like, Matt and Alex are hosting this entire year.
Now it's kind of like, who gives a fuck where it is? Let's just go.

Speaker 3 Oh, it's last minute. I don't have matching and things.

Speaker 1 There's no decor.

Speaker 3 I'm taking one for the team. I'm doing this for you.
So like no judgment. Okay, so what's your menu?

Speaker 1 Oh, what's my menu? Yeah. Have you thought that far ahead? Oh, no.
Matt's mom is going to be cooking everything. Matt's mom and Matt's sister will be doing all the cooking.

Speaker 1 And Matt and I always, to every single family event, we bring the alcohol. We are not the chefs in the family, but I have the menu in terms of like what I want to eat.
Yeah, what do you want to eat?

Speaker 1 Are we going over like our favorite Thanksgiving foods? Yeah, yeah, hit me. It hit me.

Speaker 1 We've never talked about this as friends, and I feel like we, I feel like we kind of have different food palettes when it like things we like.

Speaker 3 If we go to a restaurant, we're good because we'll do a group order and we're always aligned, but for some reason, I feel like we're not about to be aligned on this. Okay.

Speaker 1 So my favorite, like, should I just do like top favorite Thanksgiving foods?

Speaker 3 Okay. First, are you...

Speaker 3 a sides person or are you a main course person?

Speaker 1 I'm a sides person.

Speaker 3 I think that's the obvious answer. If like you're a main course person, like like what the fuck are you doing?

Speaker 1 It's like you're like looking forward to the appetizers when you're at a dinner more than you're looking to the manual. Okay.
So I would say I'm the sides person.

Speaker 1 I would say I couldn't, number one on my list, and I know this is controversial maybe, is stuffing. I am a stuffing girl through and through.
Are you a stuffing girl?

Speaker 3 It's low. That's pretty low on my list.
I feel like stuffings can go wrong really quick and they can be dried.

Speaker 1 No, I am lit. I was like, I don't want to be come off as high maintenance, but my mother-in-law loves to cook for me.
Like you were here.

Speaker 3 Yeah, she was, she was like, she brought us a pumpkin pie. I was like, girls, texting you later, like, how's the pie?

Speaker 1 How's the pie? Did you try the pie? Did you try the pie? She loves to cook for me. And I remember it was like the first Thanksgiving I was doing with Matt, and I'm such a fucking freak about stuffing.

Speaker 1 And I remember I was like whispering to Matt before we went to his mom's. I'm like.

Speaker 1 I just like feel like you've been kind of telling me your family doesn't like emphasize carbs as much and like stuffing.

Speaker 1 And I'm really getting anxious because like I'm a carb family and like I love my mashed potatoes.

Speaker 3 Matt's family is healthy. So I would be anxious going in and be like, are you going to be doing like a gluten-free stuffing?

Speaker 1 I was like, just to cut the carbs. Lauren, I was absolutely on the edge of my seat being like, I don't want to fucking miss out on a good Thanksgiving.
If you guys are doing healthy, like let me know.

Speaker 1 And I'll go to Boston Market, pick up a couple little sides.

Speaker 1 Exactly. And so his mom for my first Thanksgiving made two different stuffings, two completely that's when you know.
That's when you know. She was so nice.
And I remember trying both of them.

Speaker 3 What was the difference between the two?

Speaker 1 One was way more like

Speaker 1 fat kid and it was just like doused and everything. Greasing butter and like all the things.

Speaker 1 And then the one that was like somewhat healthier that other people were eating was actually pretty phenomenal, but she's a great cook. But overall, stuffing number one, I would say creamed corn,

Speaker 1 the sweet potatoes with the marshmallows on top. Oh, that's my number one.

Speaker 1 I have to have the good cornbread. The thing is, with Thanksgiving food, you guys, I'm someone that dips it all together.
Like, I'm going to get my turkey or my ham. Oh, you hate that.

Speaker 3 They can't touch.

Speaker 3 I'm not the weird person who's like oh my god my food can't touch but like I do not mix it all around I'll go back three times because I'll do like little ventures so they stay in their sections You're not gonna get a little turkey with gravy and put a little like mashed potatoes on it gravy and turkey.

Speaker 1 That's normal and like a little stuffing on like with it.

Speaker 3 No, no, no, no, no, no

Speaker 1 Please fucking comment down below. Are you an Alex or a Lauren? I need a like I need a sandwich essentially of my food all together in my mouth.

Speaker 3 ideally I have one of those child's plates that has like the dividers and they keep them in their sections so nothing's bleeding over and touching okay wait what is your top like go-to so my family is from like Louisiana and like the deep south so like our

Speaker 3 Thanksgiving foods are like so like southern and rich and like I love them.

Speaker 3 Number one is definitely the sweet potato casserole with the brown sugar and the mushrooms on top. Number two would be green beans.

Speaker 1 You mean mushrooms, marshmallows. Oh my God.

Speaker 3 Because I'm already thinking I had to the green bean casserole with the mushrooms and that, but God forbid those touch. That would be disgusting.

Speaker 1 Green bean casserole.

Speaker 3 Green bean casserole. It's like literally canned green beans with canned cream and mushroom soup and the canned or the little French onion things that you put on top and you bake them.

Speaker 3 Oh wait, that sounds amazing.

Speaker 1 So good. Wait, I don't think I've ever had that.

Speaker 3 You know something I saw on social media? What? About Thanksgiving foods? Someone was like, do you think it's like telling why we only eat Thanksgiving foods once a year? Because they're not good.

Speaker 1 I'm the other creep on social media that like posted being like, why can't we eat stuffing for every meal?

Speaker 3 When you and Matt were like legit like getting in a fight the other night, you're like, yeah. So the other Thanksgiving, I woke up and like Matt threw away all the leftovers.

Speaker 1 This was a literal point of contention in my home. And it was what, okay, so it was the first time we hosted.
And when you are not hosting, you're not taking fucking leftovers from people's house.

Speaker 1 So this was the first in our relationship I remember.

Speaker 3 Oh, so you, if you're a guest, do you leave all the leftovers for the host?

Speaker 1 Usually, unless they offer it to you. Okay, I also want to hear comments on that.
Like, if you're the host, don't you agree? You get to keep the leftovers and unless you offer it.

Speaker 3 Yeah, unless you're all floating.

Speaker 1 So fast forward, we host for the first time. And I remember I had like,

Speaker 1 I promise, I, I really, I love how Zay promised. In my brain, I really thought I told Matt to keep the leftovers.
Now in hindsight, I don't think I told him.

Speaker 1 I think it was in my brain, like a fucking no-brainer, Matt. Like, what are you fucking doing if you give all the leftovers away?

Speaker 1 So I remember I came down the next morning and like something I used to do is a tradition in my family, we would make like Thanksgiving sandwiches the next day for lunch.

Speaker 1 Yeah, like with bread and some cranberry sauce and the turkey and the gravy and the whole thing.

Speaker 1 I like saunter downstairs ready to eat a pumpkin pie slice and I open my refrigerator and it's spotless. I was like.

Speaker 3 Knowing Matt, he probably like wiped it down too. It was like freshly cleaned.
Like not even the smell of Thanksgiving was left behind.

Speaker 1 No, not literally Cloroxed to the fucking brim. And I remember I look in the refrigerator.
I'm like, look in our other plate. I'm like looking all over.
And I look to Matt. I'm like, where's the food?

Speaker 1 And he's like, oh, like everyone took leftovers. Like, there's nothing left.

Speaker 3 So probably so proud. Like, honey, I got it all out of the house for us.
Don't worry.

Speaker 1 And I'm mortified.

Speaker 1 And I remember being like, Matt, like, I'm genuinely upset to the point where I made him go to the grocery store with me that day and buy the stuffing mix so that I could remake stuffing for myself so I could have it with dinner.

Speaker 1 And yes, I brought that up to Matt because I was like, if we're hosting this year, you better believe, motherfucker, we are not giving away our fucking food. And he was like, okay, babe, like

Speaker 1 it makes you wonder how am I married to this man.

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Speaker 3 What is the vibe of your Thanksgiving? So, like, is it like stuffy, formal? Are you getting dressed up? Or like, are you wearing like this?

Speaker 1 So, here's a problem that I feel like I deal with, not even just in Thanksgiving, but like my every single day life is like, I want to be the girl that dresses up.

Speaker 1 I want to put together a cute outfit that like someone puts on their Pinterest board. Like, I want to be that.
But

Speaker 1 I love being comfortable more than anything in my life. Like, I don't know.

Speaker 3 I pop a button at dinner. Oh, like, I like don't like having

Speaker 3 at my birthday dinner a few weeks ago. I literally got up to go to the bathroom and was like, oh, fuck, my pants are unzipped.
Let me sit back down and put them back together.

Speaker 1 It was, Matt and I were at a business dinner the other night. He's going to kill me for saying this, but my family, like the Coopers, like, we unbutton at the table.
Okay.

Speaker 3 I'm going to unbutton.

Speaker 1 Right. Like, it is a sad thing.

Speaker 1 And Matt, you know, Matt, like, he just like would never do that.

Speaker 3 Matt's proper.

Speaker 1 He's, Matt's more proper. And so Matt would just like never do that.
And he, ever since he's like known me, he started to slowly do it. And so he would find himself.

Speaker 1 I know. So he starts unbuttoning at dinners.
Even if he's having a fucking straight vodka martini, he's like, boom, open it up. We are at a fucking work dinner and he gets up and I look at his pants.

Speaker 1 full three buttons down and i'm like maddie and he didn't catch it i don't think anyone saw it but i was laughing because it's like we unbutton in our home So back to your question.

Speaker 1 Yeah, what are you wearing? I want to dress up in some capacity, especially if I'm a host. Like in my heart, I want to lean into that Nancy Myers, like be a host, be cozy.

Speaker 1 But the reality is I at least am going to have to wear some form of elasticity. But this is what I'm realizing with being a host.
This is going to be my situation.

Speaker 1 People are going to show up and I'm probably going to do a sweater and like jeans and like a boot situation or like a little skirt and like tights and a boot. Like I'll show up and look cute.

Speaker 1 And halfway through the night, I'm going to come back down the stairs and I will be in a full sweatsuit. Benefit of hosting.

Speaker 3 You can do an outfit change.

Speaker 1 Every single time I host a party or anything at my house, that is the one thing and everyone mentions it.

Speaker 3 And everyone also, like whenever you host, everyone ends up in your clothes.

Speaker 3 Yes, because you end up dressing everyone like the end of the night, every girl at the party that you're hosting is fully in one of your sweatsuits.

Speaker 1 Because I'm like the peer pressure, I hope in a good way, where I'm like, it's getting late.

Speaker 3 Let's change the vibe. Let's change the vibe.

Speaker 1 Come on, guys. Like, you don't want to actually be in those fucking jeans.
I'll look at Chris and be like, you don't want to be in those jeans. And she'll be like, she's like, I'm completely fine.

Speaker 1 I'm like, no, come on. You don't want to be in those jeans.
And I like bully everyone to go upstairs and change into my pants. Wait, what is your vibe going to be?

Speaker 1 Are you formal or are you not formal?

Speaker 3 No, not formal at all. With my dad's side of the family, I'm the oldest cousin and I'm the only girl cousin.
So like, it's not like I have like other cousins who I'm like, let's go get ready.

Speaker 3 You're like, what are you wearing? Let's do our makeup. I'm with just like my brother and all my guy cousins.
Okay. I like take a nap and I wake up.
I'm like, oh, it's like time to eat.

Speaker 3 And I haven't showered today. I haven't done my hair.
I haven't put on my makeup. And like, in theory, I agree.

Speaker 3 Like, I want to look back at the family photos and be like, oh, like, that was a good year for me. But like, I look back.

Speaker 1 I always look like shit.

Speaker 3 Oh, my God. Like, I look like I haven't like showered in days at family Thanksgiving.

Speaker 1 That's what I will say that my sister is good at doing. Like Catherine is always down to dress up.
And like I know for Christmas this year, like she's always going to go all out.

Speaker 1 And I'm like, it makes me want to dress up with.

Speaker 3 I wish I had a little, someone putting a little peer pressure on me.

Speaker 1 I know. And, and I feel like Matt's family is, no one is going to show up in sweats, but they're very like casual.
Like, they'll do like jeans and sweaters.

Speaker 3 They're like elevated basics.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Quiet luxury.

Speaker 1 Matt's mom is watching this being like, keep it going, Lord. What else?

Speaker 1 No, but you're right. It's like, it's chill, but it's still elevated.
Okay. Next question.

Speaker 3 Ooh, okay. Something I wrote down was, are your holidays the type where you have to navigate difficult conversations?

Speaker 1 Oh, that's such a good question. Well, I think the first like obvious answer is every single

Speaker 1 year of my life has changed, right? Like when I was

Speaker 1 starting caller daddy, starting caller daddy, and all of my like extended family was like, you fucking whore. And I was like, oh my God.

Speaker 1 Now with my internal family and like Matt's internal family, no, I think if I'm going to have to, I wouldn't even say navigate difficult conversations, but if I had to be, if someone had to be like, What are you not as looking forward to?

Speaker 1 I think it's now where we're at the point where maybe it's more about like

Speaker 1 people

Speaker 1 socially, and I so understand where they're coming from, but like just socially asking, like, when are you guys gonna have kids?

Speaker 3 I think people don't realize like how personal of a question that is.

Speaker 1 Yes, because

Speaker 1 I have had so many different people in LA that I'm close with. I've had people that it took them a year to get pregnant.
I've had people that got pregnant after literally the first time they tried.

Speaker 1 I have people that have fertility issues. I have people that are freezing their eggs.
Like I know so many different women.

Speaker 1 And literally, I would say I don't know any woman that's had like a similar almost experience in my life right now.

Speaker 1 And so, of course, Matt and I want kids, but I feel like I'm, I don't know, whenever I'm in those positions, I'm kind of like, this this isn't really the time to talk about it.

Speaker 1 And I know that if anyone asks us, it's genuinely coming from a place of like, they love us and they're just like good intentions, excitement. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And like, it's really coming from like, oh my gosh, we're so excited for you too. And like, we want that next chapter and that next generation.

Speaker 1 But I do think that if anyone is listening to this at Thanksgiving this year and your sibling or your cousin is like, oh, I thought you were saying, if anyone in my family is listening to this right now, you're planning to ask me when I'm having kids, knock it off.

Speaker 1 No, but I also, well, you know what it also is, and I think this is a part of it too, that Matt and I have discussed is like not knowing what my personal experience will be with trying to get pregnant when it comes time that I want to do that.

Speaker 1 It's like I could literally say to someone like, yeah, like we're going to try this next month. And then what if I can't get pregnant? You know what I mean?

Speaker 1 Like I don't want to talk about things of timelines because I am so aware that there is no fucking timeline. There is no right time to get pregnant.
There is no no exact, like, there, none of it.

Speaker 1 So, I think I'm more just like adverse to the entire conversation, but I'm not like, please don't ask me about that. I'm more just, I always just kind of avoid it.
I'm like, oh, I don't know.

Speaker 1 Like, we're still like, we're taught.

Speaker 3 There's just so many layers to it and things you need to figure out yourself before like you share it with other people.

Speaker 1 You, Miss McMullen.

Speaker 3 Oh, I know. I'm going to be asked, like, oh my gosh.

Speaker 1 So, like, what happened? Well, one,

Speaker 3 what happened? And then, two, like, I think just like, oh, like, you're, we're 30 now and we're single.

Speaker 3 And like, not that I've had much.

Speaker 3 I don't know how much I can speak on this because I haven't been single that long and I haven't been 30 that long and I haven't really had to navigate many of these conversations yet.

Speaker 3 And maybe I'm just feeling like empowered because I'm not like feeling like beaten down. Like fucking stop asking me.
So I'm like in my empowered stage. And I feel like.

Speaker 3 I don't know, at least the approach I'm going to take is I'm going to lead the conversation where I want it to be and like be excited about it and be happy about it and be empowered by it and be like, yeah, I'm 30 and like I have a whole decade and it's so exciting.

Speaker 3 Like who knows who I'll end up with? Who knows where I'll be? Who knows what I'll be doing? Who knows what my life will be like? Like how exciting of like all the opportunities ahead.

Speaker 1 That's such a good point, like steering the conversation in a direction that like most of the time when someone asks you like, wow, like, how do you feel about that?

Speaker 1 Like you understandably, like, we know it is them.

Speaker 3 Checking in and caring.

Speaker 1 Yes, checking in and caring. And understandably, like also on the other side, it is just like based a little bit in like, you wouldn't be saying that to a man.

Speaker 1 You wouldn't be saying to a 30-year-old man who's single, like, oh, God. And I get it.
It's usually not coming from a bad place.

Speaker 1 But instead of allowing it to be this, like, sad, sad thing, you're, you can just be like, I am so happy. I know how incredible.

Speaker 3 Even if you want to do that to like shut the conversation down, like, even if I'm being like ignorantly happy, like, oh my God, I'm so fucking happy.

Speaker 1 They're gonna be like, they're gonna be like,

Speaker 1 okay.

Speaker 1 Like, what drugs is Lauren?

Speaker 1 No, that's a good idea. That's my approach.

Speaker 1 You're like, Uncle Jerry, I'm so fucking happy. I want to be single for the rest of my fucking life.

Speaker 1 It's true, though. It's funny.

Speaker 1 They're literally like, Lauren has lost her fucking happy.

Speaker 1 But I could see you. I also feel like you're so not that type of person.
So for you to like be sarcastic, I feel like people would be like, oh my God. Okay, I'm uncomfortable.
I'm going to walk away.

Speaker 1 But I do, I love that approach. How do you feel, obviously, like you mentioned early, obviously, in this episode, like you just went through a breakup.

Speaker 1 And regardless of the fact that like, I think you're in such an incredible place right now, like breakups are hard. And holidays, I feel like specifically are really, really tough because.

Speaker 1 Even when you're feeling good, there's this odd thing that like holidays do that really just shed light on like love and family and the perfect holiday notebook-esque environment and family and relationship.

Speaker 1 Like, are you at all anxious that you're just going to feel that like dark cloud in a moment?

Speaker 3 I think I'm prepared to feel it. And like, I think I'm like, I know I'm going to feel it.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 It's so new that we were supposed to be doing this Thanksgiving together and we were supposed to be doing Christmas together.

Speaker 3 So I'm still like going through phases of life where like I had tangible plans with my ex to be doing this together.

Speaker 3 So like no doubt I'm going to be sitting there being like, well, I'm supposed to be doing this right now and now I'm doing this instead. And like, so I think I'm just expecting to feel that.

Speaker 1 You're understandably going to lightly play out like what it would have been like had they been there versus now there's like this empty chair that would have had their name on it.

Speaker 1 And it's like a weird fucking feeling. It's sad, but it's not said, but it's just like, I don't even know how to describe it.

Speaker 3 It's literally what grieving is. Like that's, I went through something like very similar when I,

Speaker 3 for those of you who don't know, my dad passed away when I was in college.

Speaker 1 Yes. Like it's almost like the missing person.
Yes. Like the unsaid thing.

Speaker 3 Yeah. It's something I had felt before with in regards to holidays, like that missing presence, like the empty chair.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's a good point. Like, I feel like we've talked about a lot before,

Speaker 1 kind of like when

Speaker 1 you do...

Speaker 1 Now this is like kind of getting over like your ex-boyfriend. Now it's more like you talking about your dad.

Speaker 1 I feel like there's probably like a lot of daddy gang that have lost a family member and the traditions that you kind of have to start to like create with your family without someone is like a really challenging thing because you want to honor them and remember them, but you also don't want to like move on from them.

Speaker 1 Like, oh, I have a lot to say. Oh, give it to us.
Give it to us.

Speaker 3 So, I think

Speaker 3 the weird feeling of feeling like you're like moving on and like forgetting them, something that really made me think of that was

Speaker 3 my mom is now engaged and we love him. Shout out Kara.
Yeah, shout out Kara baby. Live your life.

Speaker 1 She's like,

Speaker 1 she's gonna clip this inside and I'll be like, Lair, you guys gave me a shout out on the pod. Yeah, we did.
Yeah, we did, Kara.

Speaker 3 She was, her and her fiancé were

Speaker 3 indescribably thoughtful about the way they introduced him into me and my brother's lives. And they were very, very seriously dating for a while, for years before he came to one of my family holidays.

Speaker 3 And I was talking about it in therapy. And I was like, I love this person.
I love him as an individual. I love him for my mom.
I love them together. I feel more at peace knowing they have each other.

Speaker 3 But why does him coming to a holiday feel so unsettling to me? And she was like, I think there's this unspoken thing that when he sits down at the fourth table setting, it means your dad's replaced.

Speaker 3 It means your dad's forgotten. And like, that's not the case.

Speaker 1 That's not true. Right.

Speaker 3 Because it was so confusing to me i'm like i love this person i love their relationship i love the whole thing but like

Speaker 3 it just making me

Speaker 1 not anxious it's just i couldn't put a finger on this unsettling feeling of like and it was the feeling that i thought that meant that my dad was being replaced and that wasn't the case at all yeah no that is like so beautiful i remember that time in your life and you handled it so gracefully and i think like again you were so fortunate to have your mom handled that way and i know that there i'm so yeah i'm so appreciative of that i know there are so many people that probably have horror stories of step parents and all of that but I do think it's such a true statement and I think we've talked about this a lot about how like there are so many ways to like continue to remember someone and a new addition doesn't mean that someone else now like can't be a part of things and I feel like it's hard when the person isn't there, but there's so many ways that you can celebrate that person without feeling like you're just like overriding them or we're done with you.

Speaker 3 Sitting at a table, the four of us, I couldn't get over the fact. It just felt like delete and like insert.
So we just like said, fuck it. And now for Christmas, we don't sit in Pennsylvania.

Speaker 3 Every year for Christmas now, we go to a different national park and we hike and we just do something entirely different and like start over fresh. And it just feels so nice and new.
And

Speaker 3 we hike and we like reminisce and we talk about them. But for some reason, just like sitting in Pennsylvania, sitting the four of us around the table just felt like,

Speaker 3 and it's so illogical, but it just felt like we were trying to like write my dad out of like the story.

Speaker 3 And it just feels so much better and more exciting and fun to just completely start over with a new tradition.

Speaker 1 I love that you said that though, that you're like, it feels completely illogical. And like, I'm pretty sure, and so many people that experience that type of grief, it's like.

Speaker 1 It should be illogical because it's this, like, you can't explain it and you don't have to explain it. Like, you felt the way you felt.
And now I love that.

Speaker 1 Like, daddy gang, like, you can make your own new traditions. And especially when things are wrapped in like trauma and loss, like you can shake shit up.

Speaker 1 And when you step out of line or we change shit up, it can feel a little disorienting.

Speaker 3 Even thinking about like breaking the tradition, like you're like, oh, I feel like I'm like fucking up and like being like a bad family member.

Speaker 1 And it's like, I bet all of you sitting at that fucking table, like, I bet your mom's fiancé was like, probably would have been the first one to be like, guys, I'm so down to do something different.

Speaker 3 He probably was ecstatic that now he's getting to hang out with a version of me that's like relaxed and like open and not me sitting around the table being like, oh my gosh, talk, right, say words, say words, right?

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 1 I think that's like a great way to like wrap that conversation up in terms of tradition is a motherfucker and it's beautiful, but it can be really, really intoxicating where you just feel like you have to follow it.

Speaker 1 And sometimes I do think like anything in this world, maybe sometimes we need to check ourselves of like, is it tradition because it's fun or is it tradition because you actually kind of don't know why it's tradition and like maybe it's time to shake shit up.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay, you're going back to Pennsylvania.

Speaker 3 I am.

Speaker 1 And you told me that

Speaker 1 when you go back to Pennsylvania for Thanksgiving, you will be attending your high school reunion. Now,

Speaker 1 I am

Speaker 1 fascinated and I need every fucking detail when you go because I haven't gone to a high school reunion. Let's just talk, first of all, high school reunions.

Speaker 1 Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Domino's.

Speaker 1 Okay, here's the thing. You know, listen up, okay?

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Speaker 1 Oh,

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Speaker 1 So let's discuss. How do you feel about it? I'm excited.
What are you going to wear? I was literally thinking of that. Like, right, do you like pop the fuck off? Like, maybe like a little bit.
Right.

Speaker 3 Like, because also I don't have social media. So, like, no one knows what I look like or like what I

Speaker 1 do or what I'm up to. You're going to kind of like pop off.
A little bit. Like, we need you to hop it out.
Like, try hard. That's like, no.

Speaker 1 While we're talking about high school, though, we have been friends for so long, but I don't know if people know this. We did not go to the same high school.

Speaker 1 We went to the same elementary school for one year, you guys.

Speaker 3 My parents fucked me up. I moved to Pennsylvania from Texas in first grade.
I went to public school and they were like,

Speaker 3 you need to find God. They sent me to Catholic school in second grade and they were like,

Speaker 3 you're not Catholic and this is expensive. Back to public school.
So literally first, second, third grade, I switched schools every year. Like imagine what that would do to a child.

Speaker 1 But thank God, right in between there, that second grade where you were supposed to find God, you found me. Yep.
And we became best friends in second grade.

Speaker 1 I remember Lauren with like her giant bows because like your mom had every color bow ready to go for you at school. I was so,

Speaker 3 I remember in first grade and even in second grade still, when we'd have dressdown days, I would cry because I'm like, mom, the kids in the north don't wear this.

Speaker 1 No, I thought you were epic.

Speaker 1 Anyway, so Lauren and I went to school for one year. We one year.
One year together. Yeah.
Okay, that's it. Yeah.
So all of middle school, all of elementary school, we didn't go.

Speaker 1 And then high school, we went to different schools.

Speaker 3 But we stayed connected, like really connected all through elementary school and middle school because we were on the same soccer team. Yeah.
Like soccer teams. We were on like three teams

Speaker 1 together. And then we went to high school.
And naturally in high school, like we literally stayed close, but it wasn't as close because you're like, you have your own friend group.

Speaker 3 Yeah, you went to private school. I went to public school.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 1 So let's talk about how we were different in high school. What do you think?

Speaker 3 You were like

Speaker 3 head down grinding. Soccer was like your mission and like your career.
Like you only hung out with like the soccer girls like every weekend.

Speaker 3 Like you were going all around the country, like doing like your college showcases.

Speaker 3 And I said goodbye to soccer and I was parting it up and living my life.

Speaker 1 I think that I slowly, slowly ramped into my more social mode. But my, for sure my freshman year, I was like head down like soccer, soccer, soccer, because I had gotten like a scholarship.
I couldn't.

Speaker 3 Oh, that's yeah, that's why you were going to that high school. I forgot.

Speaker 1 I got a I got a scholarship that they like faked was like academic. Meanwhile, like no one was giving me academic scholarship.
Like that would have gone to you.

Speaker 1 No one in their right mind was giving me an academic scholarship. It was just disguised so that I could play on the soccer team.
Okay. It's obviously the Thanksgiving episodes.
So we're partying.

Speaker 1 Maybe you're drinking. Maybe you're fucked up.
Maybe you're laying in bed and you're alone. Do we have any overlapping high school stories of us like, because we, Lauren and I did not party together.

Speaker 1 And let me really explain why. Our friendship was so wholesome.

Speaker 1 And growing up, it was based in like, we would make movies together and we would like film and we would make like I like viewed your parents as like family.

Speaker 3 Yeah. So the idea of going to your home and like cracking open a mic's hard, like I couldn't disrespect Lori like that.

Speaker 3 I was disrespecting a lot of other situations, but not Lori Cooper.

Speaker 3 I was getting after it everywhere across Newtown, Pennsylvania, but not in

Speaker 1 my house. I'm fucking obsessed.
I am obsessed. I'm going to bleep that, you guys, because she just said my street name, but I'm obsessed.
You're right.

Speaker 1 I think we had this weird thing where like our relationships to our families were so

Speaker 1 pure and youthful and we'd been through so fucking much that it was just like i would come over and we'd catch up and order dumplings dumplings dumplings yeah yep we'd get duck sauce we'd order dumplings and we would just chill and we wouldn't drink so but do we have any like high school so there were oh you came to i your new year's i was gonna say i threw a new year's party no my senior year let me just say this lauren threw this banger of a new year's party banger and when you just referenced like not wanting to disrespect my mother like that I remember I showed up late to your party and we had a lot of memories in that house.

Speaker 1 It was my childhood home. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And I think it was also a hard time for us because not to get too deep, so much had been going on with your dad that like understandably, I think in your life in high school, like no one kind of knew about fully.

Speaker 3 Yeah, most people did not. Didn't know.

Speaker 1 And you and I, like,

Speaker 1 we knew every detail. And I think I hadn't been back to that physical house in so many years.

Speaker 3 So many years.

Speaker 1 And I learned, I don't think I, did I ever tell you this? Yeah, you did. Oh, okay.

Speaker 1 I was so emotional at that party because I show up to this house that had like incredible pure memories and then like pretty, like really fucking traumatic memories. Yes.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 I remember walking in late and I'm with Moonen,

Speaker 1 our friend Nicole, and I walk in and it is like people are swinging from the fucking chandeliers.

Speaker 3 And I'm thinking like, oh, Lauren's having a you're thinking probably like 20 20 kids hanging out in my basement.

Speaker 1 Her entire school plus another school was in this fucking house jam-packed. I'm like, Lauren, I will never forget what happened on the ceiling.

Speaker 3 Oh my gosh, someone sprayed a champagne bottle

Speaker 3 like

Speaker 1 all over the ceiling. And the cork went

Speaker 1 through the ceiling.

Speaker 3 I was like, I'm coming up. I'm going to have to fix that.

Speaker 1 Or your poor mother comes home.

Speaker 1 And everyone's like trying to like be like, no, no, it's not what it looks like. And Kara is literally looking up at the ceiling, crying.

Speaker 3 So I talked about that in therapy.

Speaker 1 I I was like, I feel a little guilty for that one. It was, but it was like a sending away your house party.

Speaker 1 But I do remember like that extent of our friendship was like us feeling like so nostalgia childhood that it was like we never really drank together in high school.

Speaker 3 We didn't need to drink to have fun.

Speaker 1 Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Domino's.

Speaker 1 Okay, here's the thing: you know, listen up, okay?

Speaker 1 When you're treating yourself, that doesn't have to mean a spa day or buying something expensive.

Speaker 1 Sometimes it's as simple as great food that you want to just indulge, but it doesn't break the bank, right? Okay, Q Domino's specialty pizzas. Boom.

Speaker 1 They are loaded with toppings full of flavor and honestly feel kind of luxurious for pizza night. The new, are you guys ready for this?

Speaker 1 The new spicy chicken bacon ranch pizza is domino's spiciest pizza yet. I love this.
Okay, this is my go-to, okay?

Speaker 1 Grilled chicken, breast, creamy ranch, smoked bacon, jalapenos, provolone, and cheese made with 100% real mozzarella and finished off with a drizzle of buffalo sauce. Are you kidding me?

Speaker 1 Or you can try others like the People's Pizza Deluxe and the extravaganza or the mitzvah all packed with flavor. Daddy Gang, you know what to do.
I'm eating dominoes. I'm doing it.

Speaker 1 Boom, boom, boom, and so are you. Order dominoes specialty pizzas today.
Order now at dominoes.com. Call Her Daddy is brought to you by White Claw.

Speaker 1 It is officially the holiday season, which means back-to-back parties, hitting up the hometown bar and squeezing in every second with your favorite people.

Speaker 1 And that, my dears, calls for bringing a White Claw variety pack to every party this holiday season. Yes, you already know the drill daddy gang.

Speaker 1 My personal favorite, black cherry, duh, but maybe your cousin is obsessed with raspberry and your hometown friend is a natural lime girly. Oh, boom, don't worry.

Speaker 1 Obviously, you're gonna just bring a white claw variety pack with you.

Speaker 1 My absolute favorite part of the holiday season is always the night before Thanksgiving when it's just me and my siblings and our significant others all hanging out before the rest of our family arrives.

Speaker 1 And I always bring a white claw variety pack. Pick up a pack from from your favorite local shop and grab life by the claw with your favorite flavor this holiday season.
Please drink responsibly.

Speaker 1 Heart Seltzer with Flavors, White Claw Seltzer Works, Chicago, Illinois.

Speaker 1 High school arch nemesis.

Speaker 1 We're like, how did we get here? How did this just slide in? Because we want to talk about it. So Lauren and I were laughing about her going to this reunion.

Speaker 1 And I was talking to her about like, who are you most looking forward to seeing? Like, who are you nervous to see? Like, who do you want to impress? Who do you want to avoid? And Lauren.

Speaker 3 Impress no one, avoid no one, nervous no one,

Speaker 3 but my arch nemesis.

Speaker 3 I also have to be careful because this is going to air three days before the reunion.

Speaker 3 So I'm about to like blow up how much I have on arch nemesis and then walk into this room and be like, oh, that's the girl who like can't get over high school.

Speaker 1 Do you think that your nemesis would know

Speaker 1 that they are your enemy?

Speaker 3 I don't think she thinks I like think about her one bit.

Speaker 3 You're really good.

Speaker 3 I think she would listen to this and be like oh my god okay let's talk about why is she your nemesis okay so I don't want to accidentally paint myself as a saint here the issue is and I truly cannot remember who cheated first me or my high school boyfriend but junior year

Speaker 3 we hit rocky territory.

Speaker 1 You were saying we hit rock bottom.

Speaker 3 We hit rock bottom. We did hit rock bottom.

Speaker 3 And it kind of became this open situation

Speaker 3 but like we still were in love we were still talking all the time but like i ventured off a little bit to this older guy and he ventured off to my archinemesis but then we had a reconciliation and we came back together and i kicked the older guy to the curb or did he just graduate i don't know

Speaker 1 yeah yeah details yeah yeah yeah but my archinemesis

Speaker 3 could not get ticked to the curb.

Speaker 1 She literally was like the bug that would not die.

Speaker 1 And no, we're getting riled up.

Speaker 3 I just have such vivid memories being in my childhood bedroom after school, 4.30 p.m. prime time.
Everyone's on AIM. Everyone's on Form Spring.
Everyone's on Snapchat. And I'm snapping him.

Speaker 3 And I'm watching my Snapstreak with him go up and up and up and up and up. But I'm watching his Snapstreak with her go up and up and up and up.
And they were just, oh, that's just like a core memory.

Speaker 1 We, hold on. So did he cheat on you with her?

Speaker 3 Oh, all the time.

Speaker 1 We,

Speaker 1 did you, did you, how did you find out?

Speaker 3 Other than okay, well, there's two instances where he was caught red-handed. Okay.
Okay, incident number one.

Speaker 3 Senior prom.

Speaker 1 Wait, I don't even know this story.

Speaker 3 So it was the morning of senior prom,

Speaker 3 and we met up in a parking lot and had sex in a car.

Speaker 1 Classic.

Speaker 3 And we go to pictures. We do pictures together.
So like, that's kind of official. Like, oh, I like checked Facebook this morning.
We had pictures. We took prom pictures together.

Speaker 1 Not her making sure the receipts are dotted and the oh my god, Lauren, I'm obsessed with you. Okay.

Speaker 3 And so we're at prom. We're grinding.
I'm slapping the ground. I'm turning around.
I'm making out.

Speaker 1 Get low. Get low.
Get low. Oh, my God.
The grind chains. I can't.
I can't.

Speaker 3 And I go get a beverage. And I come back into the auditorium.
And I'm like, oh, where's my boyfriend? Grind chaining with my arch nemesis. What? Making out with my arch nemesis.

Speaker 3 in front of you in front of the whole auditorium.

Speaker 1 Wait, so what the fuck did you do?

Speaker 3 So I had known that like they were consistently talking. I would talk to him about it and be like, you have to stop.
Like I'm not doing anything else. Like I'm not hungry with anyone else.

Speaker 3 Like I want to be together. Right.
And like he was like, uh,

Speaker 3 but like they were still always operating. So I did the craziest thing I've ever done in my entire life.
Oh my God. I have

Speaker 3 I've never had, let me just give context to my character. I've never had a falling out with another girlfriend before.
I've never gotten to a physical confrontation.

Speaker 3 I've really never gotten to like an heated exchange words to this day, except this one moment.

Speaker 1 Oh, my God.

Speaker 3 I walk up to them. Okay.

Speaker 3 And I say, I pull them apart. And I say, we had sex this morning.
I hope you're enjoying the taste of meat right now.

Speaker 3 She starts hysterically crying. In high school.
In high school. I don't know.

Speaker 3 I don't know how I feel about it, but I just like snapped.

Speaker 1 This is high school like yeah people are cheating and people are being whatever it's not actually nefarious like it's actually just like but it's so funny to think about like the drama in fucking high school What's the most bold thing you ever did to confront someone?

Speaker 1 Oh, well

Speaker 3 you have like a laundry list. I'm like, this is the one time I've ever said something to anyone ever.

Speaker 1 Well, the thing is too for like me I would say which I'm gonna have to tell the story one day is oh your Arch nemesis story?

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 1 This is fucked.

Speaker 1 Because it was me really standing up for my other best friend and i then she tried to ruin your life yes i am someone that will always stand up for myself like my mother taught me that like use your fucking words um and so i would always say it to people's faces that they were upsetting me and

Speaker 1 when someone though fucks with one of my friends who who i know has a harder time speaking up for themselves I go to like a different level and I stood up for my one friend to another one of our friends.

Speaker 1 And one day I'm going to tell this story to you. It is a good story.
It is the most insane thing because it followed me into my adult life and it still is going, it's just crazy, whatever. But drama.

Speaker 1 Let's talk about drama because I can't talk about my arts anonymous because that deserves like a solo fucking episode.

Speaker 1 I need to like literally call my mom for like notes and I need to like literally call my headmaster and get the notes also from them.

Speaker 1 Okay, so drama though. One of the most dramatic things, and when I say dramatic, like this is so fucking stupid, but I remember for me with boys,

Speaker 1 my high school year boyfriend, I was so obsessed with him. And I remember he was a boarding student.
I was a day student. And so

Speaker 1 he would always just like, it was really fun in high school because you were able to try to sneak into the dorm rooms.

Speaker 1 And like, what high school kids are afforded like a bed that you can just access at the dining hall? It was hard to sneak, but we figured it out.

Speaker 1 Anyways, so I was like falling in love and I was having the time of my life, my freshman year.

Speaker 1 And I remember he was definitely a partier, and he had transferred from another school, and he had to redo his freshman year. So, oh, yeah, that's my first red flag.

Speaker 1 Anyways, I remember it is a Tuesday, and Tuesdays were always chapel days where we had to like walk to this chapel in New Jersey.

Speaker 1 And it was like a Presbyterian school, and we would sit, and we'd do chapel, whatever. And we always would walk together and we would always hold hands together.
And he was nowhere to be found.

Speaker 1 And I'm texting him, and it's all going to green. And I'm like, where is he? And the boarding students come up to me and they look like they saw a fucking ghost.

Speaker 1 And his friends come up to me and they're like, Alex, you didn't hear? And I'm like, no, like, what happened?

Speaker 1 And they're like, he drank so much last night with everyone, but like people were drinking, but he drank to the point of absolute blackout to the point where it got so, so bad that we had to blow our cover and call for help.

Speaker 1 And they took him out on a stretcher. in an ambulance and they had to bring him to the hospital and he had to get his stomach pumped.

Speaker 1 And I'm sitting in chapel as like DeAndre is like sitting next to me, whispering this to me. And I'm like, what the fuck? And finally, his phone turns on and he's like, I'm fine.
Like, I'm okay.

Speaker 1 And I'm freaking out. I'm like crying, whatever.
He gets kicked out of school, not from that, which is crazy. He did so many more things.

Speaker 1 And eventually they were like, you have to get the fuck off this campus. Like, you are literally ruining like our culture here.
And when he got kicked out,

Speaker 1 I shit you not, Lauren,

Speaker 1 for three straight months. And think about like three months of high school.
That's long. That's long.

Speaker 1 For three straight months, I wore black every single fucking day to school because I was so mad at the headmaster and

Speaker 1 I was literally protesting. I was protesting.
Or are you mourning him? I was hypo. I was mourning, but I was more protesting because I was so livid that they kicked him out.

Speaker 1 They should, let me just be clear. They should have kicked him out, but I was just so dramatic because I was like, I just lost the love of my life.
He got kicked out.

Speaker 3 Your future husband got away. Exactly.

Speaker 1 And I'm like walking around campus, and every fucking week, the dean of students would pull me in, being like, Alex, like people are getting concerned.

Speaker 1 Like, and meanwhile, I'm like, not a fucking, like, I'm not a sad fucking person usually. So I'm, they can tell I'm fucking fine.
They're like, bitch, you're fucking fine.

Speaker 1 And meanwhile, I'm like, I don't know if I'll ever recover. Like, I can't believe you got rid of him.
And eventually I got over it. But it's like, why do we do those things when we're younger?

Speaker 1 The drama within us.

Speaker 3 Oh, high school, I have like memories just like laying on the floor, like sobbing.

Speaker 1 Right? Just like heartbreak, and like, oh my God, my chest hurts if the boy broke. Like, just so fucking stupid, but honestly, like, kind of amazing.
And it's fun to reminisce.

Speaker 1 And we'll try to post pictures to you guys if we can find any of these like hidden gems. I think there's some crazy.

Speaker 3 Oh, y'all post my prom pics. I look good.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Y'all learned coming out of the woodwork this episode. I kind of love it.
I love the confidence.

Speaker 1 I think the fun thing also about like being friends for your whole life is

Speaker 1 it's really beautiful. Like, like, we have seen every single

Speaker 1 almost like decade of each other so far in our lives. Like, we have been together and we have seen it all.

Speaker 1 And I think it's also humbling to know like where we both came from because we can both keep it real with each other.

Speaker 1 Um, we've had some of our darkest moments together, we have had some of our best moments together.

Speaker 1 We have had both moments where I think we've been able to look at each other and say, you need to get your shit together, or you need to get your shit together and I'm here for you, but let's, let's pick, let's pick it up.

Speaker 1 And I feel like we've in a good way, like

Speaker 1 both done that for each other. Like it's a very, very equal sided relationship.
But I was talking about that in an episode the other month about how we're always on the opposite pages.

Speaker 3 I know.

Speaker 1 But I feel like it's kind of like the beauty of our relationship. Like we

Speaker 1 make it more interesting. It does.
It does. Listen, I think Thanksgiving is so fun.
And I hope, Daddy Gang, that you are surrounded by your loved ones.

Speaker 1 And I hope you enjoyed this little, like, throwback reminiscent episode. We have had, we have so many random stories together, and it's always fun to sit down and just like chat and talk.

Speaker 3 And yeah, I think I would just like to end this episode by saying

Speaker 3 everyone who was in my grade, I just, I think they're all probably doing amazing things. I probably, I think they're probably so successful.
I can't wait to see how good they all look.

Speaker 3 I can't wait to see how they're all thriving and their own lives. And they were just like such amazing people that I was blessed to go to school with.
And I just, I cannot wait to see you all.

Speaker 1 Bye, Daddy Gang. We love you.
Happy Thanksgiving and have the best fucking time and go eat some food and drink good drinks. We love you.
Pop a button. I three.

Speaker 1 Many. I will see you fuckers next Wednesday.
Goodbye.

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