Luke Bryan | Club Random with Bill Maher

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Certain terms apply, so be sure to check the site for details. I see her play for the first time, and I was like, that may be the biggest star I've ever seen.
You knew right then? Right then. You get blood all over you if you don't.
All over you. And you want that? That's just the way it is.
Jesus, what a bunch of redness. I like this.
Did you dress me or did I dress you? Oh, yeah. What a great pleasure to meet you.
Hey, great to see you. Music royalty in the house.
Oh, well. Royalty.
Royalty's careful with that one. Are you here for the Grammys or the fire? Well, we're taping Idol tomorrow.
But are you involved in the Grammys this year? It's coming up in a minute, right? It's coming up, and kind of missed out on some Grammy nominations through the years. Well, sweetheart, you're talking of the old time.
I've had 40 nominations, and they would never give it to me. So it's not about me.
Is it Susan Luchy? Is it like Susan Luchy? Is that the right reference? It's not. I understand where it comes from.
Oh, nice there. But what could I...
See, I haven't drank yet today because I'm going to do vodka grapefruit. Oh, and you bring your own grapefruit? No, you guys provide it.
Good. Somebody, one of your people...
Yeah. I'll try that one.
I have a. Do a little half shot.
Sure. I have a specific grapefruit person on the staff who just handles grapefruit.
That's what a baller I am, Luke. Are you serious then? No, of course I'm not serious.
You're kidding. Well, hell, I do.
Hell, I was supposed to say we're a minute in here. What do you have, like a big-ass ranch, I'm guessing? Bill, I'm really, really fortunate.
Cheers. Don't be modest.
Thank you for coming. Thank you.
Highly overpoured, but we'll fix that. No, it's good.
So my business manager called me years ago, 2011, and one of his clients in town had a farm that was coming on the market. I had just started getting to where I was making a little money and could start thinking about a farm and a place to kind of settle.
And we found 100, it's about 150 acres, about 20 minutes south of Nashville, literally cow pastures. That's where you guys all live.
I'm surprised there's that much land still available since everybody seems to have the same fucking ranch with the cow pasture. Don't they butt up against each other? Isn't like Brad Paisley's cow is always coming on your land and carry under? Brad's got his farm in the holler.
The holler? He's kind of in a holler. I'm in a cow pasture.
Wait, I thought a holler, and the only thing I know about a holler is from the movie with Sissy Spacek. Right.
Where she played Loretta Lynn. Right, a coal miner's daughter.
Coal miner's daughter. Butcher holler.
Butcher holler. I always thought a holler was like a ghetto in the country, like really a bad kind of poor area, but country version.
Well, a holler, the best way to describe a holler is there's an old classic song that Brad actually, Brad Paisley actually re-recorded called You'll Never Leave Harlan Alive. And it's a famous line is the sun comes up about 10 in the morning and it goes down about three in the day.
So a holler is you got two mountains. It's essentially an Appalachian Valley.
It's what? A gully. A gully.
A glen. A glen.
I've never. Well, you know, like from glen to glen.
You know that from Danny Boy, right? You know Danny Boy. Don't know Danny Boy.
Oh, come on.

Is that a Danny Boy?

Everybody, oh, Danny Boy.

Is that a musical?

It's like the Irish anthem.

Danny Boy, I'm sure.

Hell, I'm redneck.

I don't know.

Everybody knows that no matter what color their neck is.

Go back to your crew on Idol and ask them about Danny Boy, and they'll all say, of course. Is it a musical? Oh, Danny Boy.
No, it's like the Irish traditional folk song. It's with bagpipes.
It's awful. I'm sure I've heard it.
You've heard it. I'm not probably singing it well.
But that, to me, is what I feel like. Because, you know, I mean, Ireland, places like that, that's my heritage, you know, very similar in ways to Appalachia and, you know, very rural, clannish.
I mean, the southern part of the United States has sort of its character because it was founded and populated by Scots and Irish. Have you ever seen Gone with the Wind? Certainly.
Okay, Scarlett O'Hara. Right.
And her father has the brogue. My Brian was an original O'Brien.
Oh, is that right? And my mother is is adopted so what was funny is we never knew anything i've always had dark complexion and we always thought that i had maybe some native american in me or something like that but we i'm i'm 33 scandinavian and about 20 irish so another 2%. 2% what?

2% West African. You are? Yes.
Oh, you had your thing done? Yes. Wow.
23% West African. Yeah.
Yeah. Well, that didn't come over on the Mayflower.
That was a much worse ship. Yeah, we did some bad things.
But, you know, the good thing is, as Obama used to say, the arc bends more toward justice. We keep, I think, basically getting better.
I mean, don't tell that to the kids because they like to believe that things— I have to live with the hope that we are getting better. I believe it.
You sparking out over there? It's hysterical that these things, I say this every week, but how did they burn down half of Vietnam with these Zippo lighters? I just can never get, I get it at home, I put the lighter in, the fluid, and then I get here and it never works. Here you go.
But I don't want that one. I want it to look like this.
Cool. These look.
See, Bill, you can even do the cool flick. Cool.
I can't even do it with two hands. It's not me.
It's this fucking thing. I don't know why I have that.
I may grab a cigar. I don't know what I'm doing wrong.
I may get a cigar. You can.
I mean, I never understand what anyone sees in them, but if it makes you happy, I'd be more than happy to. What is that? No, it's just a little recreational.
I don't even do it that much. I mean, I'm sure there are people who've sat right there who do it all day long, you know, but I never was that kind of guy.
But for a special occasion with a special person, it's great to get to know you. You know, I have to be honest, growing up in New Jersey, you know, country music was just not on my radar.
It's just not something we did. So I'm slowly catching up to it because like for so long, and it was my fault, I just wrote it off as like, that's just a different kind of music that I don't.
and then slowly i you know even starting like back in the 90s with i remember brooks and dunn and then obama used to play their uh only in america song which i love and i was like wow this is not my granddaddy's country you know it's a great electric morphed into americana and with rock and I tell you, when I go play, when I'm in Jersey, when I'm up there in that part of the world and I see... Part of the world? Well, that's...
You're talking like we're Eskimos. It's fucking New Jersey.
We have a turnpike, Luke. We have a turnpike.
That you pay a toll on. Oh, we pay too many tolls.
Too high taxes. The, and when I say that, when you grow up in South Georgia and you start your music journey and then you arrive in New Jersey and people are screaming your music it's one of the most proudest moments you could have as a musician because and what was my term I used up there? What did I just say? You people? No, you said that part of the world.
That part of the world. That unexplored foreign land.
Mark, grab me a cigar out of my green bag, please, if you get a minute. Done.
I can't sit here and let this man smoke alone. Clove cigarettes? That's what I used to call it because I thought they wouldn't let me do it.
Yes, so. Again, we've changed so much.
32 years ago, reluctantly tried weed. And, man, it's been something that I've never done a lot of, but I don't have those stigmas.
Why do you say reluctantly? Because, man, I grew up in the Bible Belt where it was built. It was seriously.
What does the Bible say about it? Because I don't remember anything. Well, I don't even know why they called it the Bible Belt until somebody explained it to me.
I don't remember anything in the Sermon on the Mount. I remember things about, you know, the meek shall inherit the earth.
Right. You know, there were other very interesting, I mean, Jesus was quite the revolutionary philosopher.
I don't remember anything about not sparking up, you know, that it would corrupt you or, you know, whatever they said later about it. Well, oh.
Devil's weak. No, no, no, no.
Gateway. Gateway.
Well, actually, it's funny. That's ironic because the gateway drug is actually beer.
Well, and your parents' beer. Well, I mean, the love that you country people have for beer is just something I've never, ever seen on this earth.
I mean, the devotion, the singing about it, the encomiums. Well, and I've hit the subject a lot.
It's fucking beer. I never understand that, the amount of songs.
Well, it's, you know, beer is really ingrained in the culture. I mean, it's from the football aspects of growing up in the South to sharing your first beer with your dad, to sneaking your first beer, trying to buy your first beer, you know, with a fake ID.
Wait, so you drank it with your dad before you snuck it? Well, you know, when we were kids, I think if we were on a hunting trip or fishing trip, as a kid, you'd have a... Beer? Well, you'd go, Dad, what does beer taste like? And your dad hands you a Budweiser and you'd taste it and spit it out of the boat.
But so I just think it's a part of our, it's ingrained in our culture as, and it just, it's involved in when we play shows and honky tonks and the fabric of, I mean, heck, when you look at, there's a tear in my beer, Hank Williams, and that was 60 years ago. So it's, beer's a pretty.
Yeah, no, it's almost liturgical. It's almost like an ointment, like a sacrament.
There's something almost... But did beer not mean that? Was it not that much? I hate beer.
I think beer's gross. I mean, I've drunk way too much liquor in my life.
It wasn't beer. I feel like beer is a poor man's liquor.
It's gassy. You need to drink a shitload of it to get high.
I don't like wine either. I think wine's another, because they're both like 6 and 8 or 10% alcohol or something.
This shit's like 90. Get to the point.
Yes. It's so funny.
You guys, you like beer and moonshine. Either 3% alcohol or 200.
You're ingesting 3,000 calories or you're blackout in 10 minutes. Larry Flint used to give me moonshine.
Larry Flint, remember him? Yeah, yeah. Hustler guy.
Yeah. Club random.
I'm getting the random now. The random is.
Right, right. We try to live up to our name.
Well. But no, I never liked beer.
I think it was the first thing I ever drank because I have a memory of being, I don't know, 14 or something. And at night, at night with a bunch of other ne'er-do-well, oh, we were a rough gang there in New Jersey.
Oh, we grew up on the mean streets. Well, the mean circular driveways of Bergen County, New Jersey.
No, we weren't rich at all. But it was, you know, like lower middle class.
We had a little house. So we went on the golf course and drank rolling rock beers.
Rolling rock. Did you have that in the sound? We had rolling rock.
They were called green grenades. They were like little bottles.
And I remember. Now, how old were y'all? Old enough that I threw up.
Threw it up. I threw, yeah.
Of course, your body rejects every drug you do at first because you shouldn't be doing it. Yeah, my first beers were probably 15, 16, and then we would, every now and then, we'd go get Old English, which was like a malt liquor beer.
I remember one called Southern Comfort. Southern Comfort.
That sounds like it may have come from your neck of the woods. We used to do Southern Comfort and lemonade.
Wow. That's as...
Did you ever do Bartles and James fuzzy navels? No. You remember those things? I remember Bartles and James, but I'm not even sure.
Was that liquor? I thought it was some sort of wine cooler. It was like the first Smirnoff Ice.
It was 10 years before Smirnoff Ice or Zimas. You remember Zimas? Vaguely, yeah.
No, there was that terrible period when you're first drinking, and you don't have a drink. So you got to sample them.
You just drink anything. And narrow down to what you don't throw up.
I mean, it's just not good not to have a drink. You know, James Bond had a drink.
Right. Vodka, shaken, not stirred.
You know, there was no, that's a man. You don't want to be like, um, planter's punch.
Whatever fucking thing.

And the football players are endorsed. I mean, it's hard not to start.
You know, I know. But it's like, that's what you expect from a young girl.
You know, what are you drinking? I don't know. Okay.
You know, just, you don't want to be there with liquor. You want to know.
Listen, be glad you probably didn't do the Jager bombs. Oh, I did.
I used to do Jager bombs. Did you do Jager bombs? I remember doing, oh my God, I can't even believe I did this to myself.
I remember drinking, when I did finally get a drink, it was Jack Daniel. Right.
For like 25 years. They sent me a plot of land, like just a one-foot plot.
That's how much fucking Jack Daniels I was apparently consuming. And I remember drinking all night at like a Playboy Mansion party.
And then like at three in the morning, starting with the Jägermeister. I mean, how could my body have taken that? Bill, I didn't realize you.
I didn't realize all this drinking was going on. Well, that certainly wasn't every night, but yeah.
Yeah, but I get it. But Jäger bombs were, oh, I mean.
And then. It's just so terrible.
The worst. You know what? And then, so my college drink, very interesting, crown and water.
As a 20, I didn't get to college until I was 21. Well, I'd gotten a two-year degree from a small junior college and then transferred.
So I was 21. What did you think you were going to be? Man, I didn't think I'd be this.
No. See, I did.
Did you? I thought you would be exactly this. No, I thought I would, I knew I was going to be a comedian when I was like eight years old.
Well, I knew I loved being on stage and I knew I loved performing and singing, but I think I just, I knew that I had to do college too. That was really ingrained in me yeah me too so i wasn't you know i was at 21 what was your backup plan my backup plan would have been you know after after i left college i was playing in bars and uh at different colleges all through the southeast and man it fun as shit.
We'd load up on the weekends

and we'd go build one market.

We'd go try to do Valdosta, Georgia

and then Statesboro

and then kind of my hometown.

And then we'd try to start doing Athens

and we'd play all these shows in Athens, Georgia.

And if you could get in the damn Athens music scene.

Oh, yeah.

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Learn how our cash management services can support your business at valleystrong.com. The Athens music scene, we sold out the Georgia Theater for the first time.
Athens, maybe I'm wrong, but I think of Athens as alternative. I mean, Athens is R-E-M.
No doubt. No doubt.
And B-52s. Yeah.
But listen, I mean. I think of Athens as sort of the alternative to Nashville's more mainstream.
It totally is. And there's such amazing music coming out of Athens.

But Bill, you got to understand. Macon, Georgia.

How about Macon?

Macon, shit.

Well, that's more my era.

Like, they turned out a lot of, like, what came out of Macon?

Allman Brothers.

Allman Brothers.

Jeez, Phil Warren.

Leonard Skinner, where's that from?

Leonard Skinner was, they're from Jacksonville. Oh, yeah, that's right.
Same thing. So, man, you know, Macon, you got James Brown.
Oh, right. You got.
Stacks Records? Is that from, is that? Capricorn Records. A guy named Phil Warren.
Okay, where was Stacks, maybe?

Stacks was Memphis.

Memphis.

Memphis, yeah. So.
But yeah. Shit, Bill.
And then Elvis, Sun Records. That's Memphis, too.
Well, you know, and God, there's so many complexities in all that Southern music. But, you know, when i started headlining the georgia theater in athens um in such a such what you said uh athens was a real diverse town yeah certainly and and and for me to go in there and probably way more politically liberal uh than than your standard Southern University or was leaning that way at the time.
For example, I bet in the last election, Nashville voted, you know, it's a city, it's blue. So it's not going to be like- But I bet you, considering how well Trump did in places he hadn't done that well in the first time around, I bet you Nashville was maybe 50-50 Trump for her, whereas Athens, I bet you was 70% for Kamala Harris.
Just politically, I think that's where they are. Right now, I think Athens may have tilted back a little a few years ago, but I couldn't argue with you on that.
I don't know. I mean, the South is diverse.
I mean, I playedville alabama you know which is where nasa is right yeah i mean that was that crowd was almost too liberal for me yeah and huntsville's one of the fastest growing uh yeah if they're probably the number one fastest growing city in uh north america or even suddenly suddenly in the south But Huntsville's on fire. Huntsville is on fire? Well, on fire.
Yeah, I know. Yeah, we're not that sensitive about it.
Lord, Bill. No, we are not on fire today.
But Huntsville's a great town, Nashville's. Why, because they're pouring a lot of money into NASA? Maybe the space program.
I think the space program, I think. But it's just a lot of smart tech people there.
Because the space program pulled a melting pot of smart people from all walks of life. I mean, I guess 30, 40 years ago when the space program maybe was really rocking in Huntsville, that pulled all the smartest people from India.
Right. I mean, it pulled everybody to Huntsville.
Well, they're getting pulled there for their brains and all that. But then 40 years later, those ethnic, you know, different cultures.
I think that mixture is great. Me too.
It's amazing. I mean, eggheads, they should be in fucking Alabama.
You know, just because the people are generally nicer. I mean, look, if we get onto political issues, are we going to have arguments about some things? Yeah, we are.
But, you know, I keep preaching, you can't hate people who disagree with you, except about the most absolute outrageous things. But you can't hate them if they like Trump.
You can hate Trump. I get that.
I'm not a big fan. But you can't hate them for who they like.
So, like, I think it's very good when those type of people who normally would be at Stanford or some other stifling place with a equally obnoxious sort of wokeness that's uber, uber, uber on the left, get down to a real place and talk to real people and you'll see that they're not monsters. And actually, in a lot of ways, they're just more fun to hang out with.
They're looser. They're not uptight.
You can make jokes. They're not looking around the room to see who's the bigger name.
You know, there's a lot to recommend it. Sounds amazing.
Yeah, I wouldn't live there. No, I'm not kidding.
But I really do like it uh and i could i i could there are places i could live but i you know i i look with all the it went to fire i've been here 42 years bro i'm dug in yeah and you know i i came from georgia and then you know georgia brought me obviously out here with american idol yeah it out here, is it? Man, it's amazing. I mean.
It really is. Is it really that horrible to go to the Tower Bar for dinner? No.
It's not bad at all. I go back home to Georgia and even friends in Tennessee, and they're like, man, how crazy is it out there in L.A.? And I'm like, man, it's not that crazy.
There's just good restaurants. Yeah.
I mean, a lot of the people are crazy, but they're show people. And show people, they're just not.
You know, what I can't handle, man, is just I just hate seeing homeless people struggling, man. And I didn't grow up seeing homeless people, and because it was like in the South, churches would help.
Churches would come together and help somebody struggling. That's the kind of thing churches do.
I never denied it. I'm an atheist, but I don't deny it.
Well, but churches would keep people going. And then as a Southern boy, you come out to LA, and I'm like, how can we fix this? It is my dream that every homeless person in LA has their own holler.
No. But I think we could— Man, you could fill a holler up with homeless people out here, and I hate that.

Is it like there's no homeless in Nashville? Yeah, there are. There are, and it's a problem.
And what is Nashville's solution? Man, I think they're trying to figure it out. So that's what we're— They're trying to figure it out.
And, man, every crosswalk, I mean, every red light stuff, there's a homeless person sitting there. How many acres do you have on your farm? 150.
And you can't fit any homeless there? Bill. No, I'm fucking with you.
That was amazing. That was amazing.
And so wrong to do that to me. Hey, I've got a lot of land here, too.
This fucker's got five acres up here. No, I don't have five acres up here.
But I got a nice little holler. And you know what? I'd love to invite all the homeless, but I'm not going to do it either.
And neither would anybody. I understand.
Don't ever shame me for not being as good a person as you. And don't pretend that you wouldn't be inviting a potential nightmare in your life that also probably wouldn't even benefit them.
That's not the answer that we have with the homeless into our private residences. The answer is that government, as you said, should figure this out.
And the fact that they can't is ridiculous. I know why we can't here, because everything is a bureaucratic nightmare with too much red tape and regulations.
If I was king, I would just make a giant, or many, if I guess you need that many, you know, shelters, barracks. I'm sorry if you have to live in barracks, but it's better than living on the street.
And they do that. And they said, they't want to live there.
There's no security. Get some.
How much did it cost to put a fucking guard on every aisle of the barracks and make sure nobody is robbing each other, have doctors, compared to like, putting them up in hotel rooms? That's what they do. They come- Have mental health people come through there.
I mean, they do it on an ad hoc basis.

They usually do this in third world countries,

because America is now often a third world country in some ways.

They have these big events for like three days where they'll put up a big tent

in some place where there's extreme poverty.

And you can do this in Ethiopia, but I've also seen it done in Appalachia.

And they have a big tent, and people from the area know who cannot get their teeth looked at or eyeglasses. They come in, and it's like a renaissance fair, except you're getting your fucking tooth pulled that is killing you.
I don't know why there can't be a semi-permanent version of that.

I agree with you.

Not that you're the one who should have to answer that.

Well, no, man, I agree with you.

Like, just get them somewhere where they're not, you know,

out there hurting in the street.

I mean, that's got to be just, like, of all the answers

that we could come up with for this, I feel like bottom of the barrel is stay on the street, which seems to be like that's the ultra woke position is like don't disturb them. It's like messing with a endangered species that's in its natural habitat.
And we can't. So don't.'s, the mental approach to it seems to be wrong.
And by the way, it wasn't what liberals believed 20 years ago. I used to do that show called Comic Relief.
Do you remember that? Certainly. That Whoopi Goldberg and Billy Crystal and Robert Williams.
And we are, the whole point of it was, let's get these people. Y'all were my damn base.
I mean, y'all were weaved into what I learned comedy as a kid. Really? Hell yeah.
What did you watch as a kid? What was on? Like you were a kid in the 90s? Man, I was a kid when Thriller came out. 80s? Yeah, when Thriller came out.
Okay. Yeah, that was early 80s.
Yeah mean i was born in 76 thriller thriller oh my god what a what a moment yeah thriller was we bill we would you know thriller came out and we would rush home from school and we knew that certain increments mtv was going to play the thriller video. Is that right? And we watched it every time.
And then we watched Footloose. So Michael Jackson was— Oh, my God.
When my family members would have a bunch of people come in the house, my dad and my mother and my brother and my sister, they would make me dance like Michael Jackson in front of strangers.

See, I'm always trying to prosecute this argument that America is just much more complicated than the two sides who are always screaming at each other would allow. It's just like these things that you might not suspect.
I had this special that's running now, and then I talk about J.D. Vance's grandmother

who told him when he was eight years old

and thought he might be gay because he only had boyfriends.

And she says to him, you know, do you like to suck dicks?

Do you want to suck dicks?

And he said...

J.D. Vance's grandmother said that.

Said that to him?

Yeah, because he was saying, am I gay, Grandma? And she said, do you want to suck dicks? And he said, no. And she said, then you're not gay.
But even if you did, God would still love you. J.D.
Vance told you that? No, no, it's in his book. Wow.
Hillbilly Elegy. Right, well, I've heard the...
And the point is like... I've heard the movie getting around that he wrote it, but I hadn't had a chance to sit down and watch it.

Oh, yeah.

Ron Howard made it into a movie.

Right.

Was Amy Adams-

I haven't seen either.

I just read the part about the dicks.

Well, I got you.

But I just think, you know, coming from his grandmother who was-

Saying something like that.

Born in Kentucky in 1933.

America is just not as easily pigeonholed as they would want to make it.

Thank you. Born in Kentucky in 1933.
America is just not as easily pigeonholed as they would want to make it. And see, I know this because I've traveled this country.
Man, me too. For over 40 years.
Right, everybody's got their differences. But they're basically the same.
You're damn right they are. Because you know what they don't want to do? I mean, they want to come to great music.
They want to see all kinds of great music, from rap to country to damn— They just want to come out and spend their hard-earned money, and they want their tax dollars to look like it's helping the country. And also, I got to say— Don't you agree? I totally agree.
I mean, man, I've looked at the, from when I moved to Nashville and made zero to what I make now, and I paid a ton of taxes. And man, I just want to see it.
I just want to be able to go, that's my damn tax dollars working right there. That's helping people and making the country a better place.
But I've never, I've yet to see. Buddy, I live in a state with 13% tax on every year.
And I just had to endure a fire that would have happened anyway, but could have been handled a lot better. But my 13% was not used wisely.
I know. Don't you want to see it do well? Yes, I do.
Gosh. That's what I'm saying.
I do. But, you know, we just are in this place where people are locked into these.
They're brainwashed on both sides, like a certain percentage of them. I can't get through to them.
I can't get through to the ones who are supposedly on my team. I mean, I've said to people right in that chair, you know, like, we voted for the same person.
It's just that you are why she lost. Because...
Well, and, you know... Shoot, I don't know.
It was, it's been a crazy, you know, you look from the, it's just been a crazy political time in my life. It's only getting crazier.
And yet, you know, I just will not sit there and stand for America sucks. And, you know, like a lot of what you see, and it just comes from rank ignorance.
I mean, they're just so ignorant. They have no idea what anywhere else in the world is actually like.
They just know this is the worst place. And that we're irredeemable and racist from the beginning, and that will never change, even though it's changed immeasurably.
All that kind of stuff, that's what they know. But, you know, I'm just always amazed at with what all we're dragging behind us, not just the over bureaucracy and the taxes that don't go to the right things, but, you know, like really kind of losing democracy now and how somehow the economy is all based on two things, cryptocurrency and rich men paying women on the internet to do something while they masturbate.
That's the entire, and yet we keep going, America? It's like my dog Chico. He should be 17.
He should be dead. He's out there barking at nothing right now.
He just, we just, I do. I love America.
We just keep going, you know? It's hard to make a place like this go, though. We're irrepressible, though.
Man, I was thinking about that a couple days ago in your life. Man, it's hard to keep the different people in this country.
It's hard to keep them in check with all their little spots from the South and the Northeast and in the Midwest and what the Midwest claims they're great at, like basketball or something, and then you get the South. I mean, just from sports and culture and all that, and then you throw it.
And music. And music.
Look at all the crossover between rap, R&B now with music. I mean, Beyonce having the big country album.
Right, right. I mean, who's the Shabuzi? Hell yeah.
But that comes from you liking Michael Jackson when you were six. Exactly.
Yeah. And that's what this country made that, hey.
Where's my butler?

No, this country made all that happen.

We fought our, we fought, we're fighting all the time as a country.

But damn, we made our way through it.

And here we are.

And there really are people who just want to gin up the bad side.

And look, I've made a living making fun of this country for 31 years on television. I get it.
And I haven't stopped doing it, but I like to keep it in perspective. So, you know, when I hear about what a racist, misogynist patriarchy we live in, how do you even leave the house? You know, I'm like, I'm traveling all over the country.
I'm just waiting for one dirty look from one black person. Just a dirty look.
It ain't going to happen. Well, it might happen.
But like, I just never see, like in real life, I don't see like some, maybe they're the greatest actors in the world. I don't think that's what it is.
I think just like we're people, I'm here doing a job, you're doing your job, we're respecting each other, we're, hey bro, how you doing? I just don't see this hatred that they want. Some people just seem to want to always be stoking it.
I hate that. I do too.
And it happens on both sides. I wish you wouldn't.
Well, that's because, you know, everyone's on social media, and you know what algorithms thrive on? Hatred, controversy. That's what gets more people clicking.
Love does not get you clicking. You bring up, you know, when you think about, I mean, Shaboozy and then you think about, I mean, hell, Beyonce's, she's probably the greatest singer in our lifetime.

Really?

I mean, she's one of the best singer and performer of all time, in my opinion. She's certainly the most successful.
Gosh, she's so successful. And then you look at, I mean, gosh, I mean, I remember seeing Destiny's Child and just wondering and seeing Beyonce.
And I was like, that's one of the most beautiful human beings I've ever seen in my life. Yeah, she's a cute girl.
And then she sings like that and goes on to have this career. And then it's just, that's me.
But so, I mean, Taylor Swift. Oh, I was about to say that.
Taylor Swift's year, no. What she did is incredible, Bill.
Yeah. I don't really get either one of their musics, but that's me.
You know, I'm 69 years old. I don't have to.
It ain't for you. Well, some stuff that's younger is definitely for me.
Right.

I do, because it sounds to me more like the kind of stuff, you know, The Weeknd is for me, his hits anyway. Right.
Like, it sounds like something that could have been a hit in the 70s or even the late 60s when I first started to listen to music. You know, it's just got that feel.
And then, like, you know, Nikki Glaser was here.

She's like, you know, she's the biggest Taylor Swift fan. She went to the show 18 times.
Unbelievable. But her personality, you would think, because she's such a great dominating female personality, her personality, you would think she would not like Taylor Swift.
And then you find out she's like gone to her show 18 times, right? Did you have Nikki Pegg to be like a Taylor Swift groupie? Yeah, because I know Nikki for a long time. I did.
Oh, yeah. And, well, Taylor Swift must be doing some Vulcan mind meld to the women.
There must be some estrogen-laden sort of vibe that's some evil ray. Not evil.
It's not evil. It's not evil, but it is a ray.
It is a ray that's going out to all women. And so it makes them think that this music is, it's not terrible music.
I just don't get it, it's like, why it has been elevated to this level when it seems to me fairly run of the mill. I mean, again, not bad.
Listen. But I watched, Nikki said, you got to watch, you'll catch up on her whole oeuvre, watch the concert film.
And I did, all 19 hours of it. And I was really struggling because I always want to like everything.
I'm just a customer. I have no musical ability.
I'm just the young man in the 22nd. All right, listen, do you know why Taylor Swift is that big? Tell me.
Man, when she first started, it was right when social media, where you could talk to your fans.

Well, 2009 was the smartphone, and that was her first year, maybe.

So I think-

Well, Taylor Swift.

So I was going to, I was going on a radio tour for my first single.

And-

Heartbreak Hotel?

Shit.

No.

I love you. to, I was going on a radio tour for my first single.
And. Heartbreak Hotel? Shit.
No. Oh, that's Elvis.
You remind me. Hey, I will.
You remind me. I'll take the compliment.
It is a compliment. So I got, I get to, I had to fly out and meet a radio station up in the north, up in the northwest.
And first time I'd ever been to the Northwest. And it was just beautiful, just gorgeous.
The two volcanic mountains in the background. My ass was fired up to be up there in the Northwest.
Well, I go to this little nightclub. It's Halloween night.
Oh, wow. And my song, my first single, all my friends say, had not come out of the radio.
But I just went to go see a concert, and Taylor Swift was on this Halloween night. She was on this radio show.
And I had just heard the song Tim McGraw for the first time. And it was interesting to me when I heard that song.

And I remember thinking. A song called Tim McGraw?

She wrote a song called Tim McGraw.

How confusing.

To someone like me, who's just learning about country music,

there's a song by a country star called another country star.

But go ahead.

Okay.

Tim McGraw.

So she.

It's like moves like Jagger.

Totally. It was an ode to Tim.
And man, she crushed it with that song. Right.
And so I'm standing there at that bar, and the radio station brings her out, and I see her play for the first time, and she's got an angel costume on with little butterfly wings and a little sparkly guitar and like a little halo. And I'm sitting there watching this girl sing.

And man, I was like, that may be the biggest star I've ever seen.

You knew right then?

Right then.

Because?

Because she just had it.

Right.

I mean, she had the outfit.

Oh, she does put on a great show.

She had. You know, I feel bad every time Taylor Swift comes up.
I have to, like, be honest about it. I don't quite get the music, although I like Sparks Fly.
Hell, yeah, you do. That one I do.
Well, she got you on that one. Yes, she did.
So that's all it takes. Well, it's not all it takes because, obviously, I've heard the other ones and didn't get it.
Oh, God. Well, listen.
There was one I liked in the concert. What? Other than Sparks Fly because you already liked that one.
Something all. All those years ago or all, I don't know, I forget.
It was pretty good. But really, I mean, there's a lot of singing on a roof with Moss.
Listen, so when she, right after I saw her in that Halloween show, you know the world on the street was she was out there talking to all her fans on socials.

Nobody ever did it more than her.

She earned every—she worked her butt off and earned those fans.

Right.

Well, and here's to her butt.

But I just want to say, and this is a backhanded— but I just want to say, like,

and this is a backhanded...

Am I rambling?

No, you are not.

Well, first of all, this show is about rambling,

so it couldn't be bad.

But, like, this sounds like a backhanded compliment,

but I admire her.

Yeah, the music either works or it doesn't,

but as a human, I have great admiration because to be that far up in the stratosphere and not be doing anything stupid, being still a good role model, basically, you know. She's had a bunch of boyfriends.
Boyfriends. Who hasn't? Yeah, when you're, what is she, 30? And the people are like, boyfriends are the worst you can say.
Excuse me, girlfriend, she's 35. Yeah, but the only thing people can say about her, she's had boyfriends.
No, exactly. And then she goes and lands Travis Kelsey.
Well, first of all. And then it's like, oh, my God, she's crushing it.
I don't want to go back to this, but I did this once, I think, on my show. What? And it's pretty funny.
I'm only being facetious, but, like, all these boyfriends. And, like, to be that famous where we actually could name, I could name, I don't even, I'm not even a fan.
And I can name all her boyfriends. Okay, there was John Mayer and the English actor and the other English actor.
And then there was, you know, I could go down the list. How do you know that? And Jake Gyllenhaal.
Because she's that ubiquitous. You just named it.
But my. You just named, you couldn't name two of her songs, but you know all the universe.
That says a lot. You know, you just.
But. I don't know all the boyfriends you just rambled off.
None of them are black. Oh, God.
I'm just going to say. Couldn't we, shouldn't we really in this day and age have one in there? I mean, and then she goes to the NFL, which is 80% black and finds a white guy.
I mean, you don't even look that hard. I mean, for God's sakes, especially on defense.
All right. That's again, facetious, but no, I mean, I am a big fan.
Think think about it. Then she's with Travis Kelsey.
So what? Which is crazy. First of all, that's going to end.
But then there's tabloids like. That's going to end.
Oh, I don't know. I don't care.
You want to make a bet? I don't want to make a bet. But what's funny.
Okay. As soon as there's tabloids like Taylor and Travis Kelsey's mom not agree.
And I'm like, what are we doing? I want to go on record as saying, and this is a knock on either one of them. I think they're both fine people.
But that relationship is going to end like Rihanna's husband, ASAP and Rocky. No.
But look, Travis is not the keeper. He's just not.
I mean, he's not yet ready to be house trained. He's not.
And he's going to be coming off another Super Bowl. I'm not getting into any of that.
Of course you shouldn't. But I'm just telling you, he's you 20 years ago with more liquor in him.
I mean, it's just, you know, think about what you were 20 years ago, right? Well, are you married? Yes, I am. How long? 18 years.
Just 18 years of marriage. That's just, it's amazing.
We celebrated, well, hell, we just celebrated it in December. So how did you know she was the one? Man, I just walked into, you know, she walked into a bar and there she was.
And it was just like that one right there. That's so interesting.
And then it was a college bar, a college bar that, you know, that if my brother doesn't pass away, I never go to that college. And then if you lost your brother right i lost my brother and then that sent me down this path and then um i meet caroline and we kind of date on and off through college but it wasn't time and we kind of broke up at the end of college and then it was five and a half years till we got back together and man that five and a half years, I went to Nashville and got my career going.

I did all kind of crazy shit, you know, drinking.

Like I said, I told you I started college drinking Crown and Water.

Who the hell is 21 and just, well, that's all they drink?

Crown and Water?

Are you kidding me?

I had Darrell Hall of Hall and Oates here. What the hell they drink? Well, they don't drink anything together because they're suing each other.
Oh, God. They need to get over that shit, too.
Yeah, they put out some great records. Dude, every time I party, I listen to You Make My Dreams Come True.
Wow. It's the greatest.
No, they were awesome. We ought to to rock we ought to play that damn song but i asked at the end our careers which is shortly after which is yeah about 9 30 um no we're fine um but uh yeah but you make my but how did...
Because, like, back in the day, I mean, he was a real matinee idol-looking guy. And, you know, plus that falsetto and the voice.
Oh, yeah. I said, how does a rock star, you know, with all the women throwing themselves at you, I mean, how do you resist? And he said, it's impossible.
I just thought... Poor guy.
Yeah, poor guy. Right.
Well, man, you know, Hall and Oates and heck. So anyway, just me and my wife, we got, you know, three kids at home with us.
And so circling back to that, it's just been an amazing ride with my family and my life, my dad and boys. How old are your kids? My nephew came to live with us when he was 13, and he's now 23.
Nephew. Nephew, Till.
He was my sister's son. Oh, that's beautiful.
And then we got our 16-year-old, Bo, and got a 14-year-old named Tate. So three boys, and then— Those are rough ages, 16 and 14.

I'm guessing.

I don't have kids.

It's pretty amazing, though.

You know, they're—

But aren't they too into the viral—I mean, the virtual world?

Man, they are.

You know what's crazy?

Fortnite, man.

Fortnite.

Yeah.

Jesus.

I wouldn't know it if I tripped over it. But I certainly have heard a lot about it, and I vaguely know.
I certainly know it's not real. It's something they're playing.
Man, dude. These kids love it.
I know. My son, for Christmas, gets the whole new processor to process the speed of this damn thing for Christmas.
it's got all these light-up fans on the back, and he gets a set of headphones, a new keyboard, and a mouse, and he looks like he's on a turntable, and they're talking to their friends on headsets and talking shit and cussing. And then I have to go in there and, I mean, they're into that fortnight.
Getting them out of their virtual world is becoming more and more of an impossible task. I mean, this is the same thing that's going on in their sex lives.
Because look at the success of OnlyFans. I mean, OnlyFans is a bunch of guys who must know in some part of their brain that this girl that they're paying is not really their girlfriend.
Not even the person who's actually texting back to them. That's some fat guy in the Philippines.
And they don't seem to care. They would rather do that than have a real girlfriend or do whatever it takes to get a real girlfriend.
I feel this is not going to come out well. Well, you know, we just, I don't know what those guys are up to, but, you know, you just got to teach your dang kids to go try to be funny in class and work hard and study and keep your, I don't know, man.
But do you do things with them in the outdoors? I mean, things- Do I? Yeah. That's all we do.
Oh, what about the Fortnite? Well, that's how I get them away from that. Oh, I see.
Man, I've taken my kids on. We go on every hunting and fishing trip together.

So that's good.

You still murder innocent creatures with family members.

Thank God that tradition lives.

It lives with our family.

And man, we have a lot.

So what do you hunt?

Man, we hunt.

Do you eat what you hunt?

Yeah, you know, we certainly do. Okay.
Like I said, some stuff. Then I approve.
Oh, man, but it's not like, well, what's, you know, Bill, we go on an annual elk hunt with me and my three boys, and we kill a couple of elk a year, and we get it processed at some elk dude out in a— You got an elk man. You got an elk processor.
Yeah, I got an elk man. Well, listen— Processes my elk.
So listen, then I'm at my farm one day, and I see this huge refrigerator truck pull up to my farm. And I'm like, what in the hell is this? It's a giant truck.
And I run up there to the side of it, and I said, man, why are you here? He goes, you Mr. Brian? And I said, yeah.
He goes, I'm delivering your elk meat. And I'm like, shit, I never knew that's how it got to my farm.
It just always showed up in our refrigerator in the garage. But I met the guy that delivers it.
Well, it turns out this dude has a business where he picks up everybody's wild game that they go do in a—oh, totally. So am I blowing your mind with this? I'm listening.
He picks up his—it blew my mind. This guy's job is to take his refrigerator truck, pick everybody's game up, and deliver it to their house.
And, man, we eat all of our elk every year. I had a girlfriend in the late 80s, early 90s, and her father was military.
You know, he was a hunter, and I remember spending time there and eating a lot of elk. What did you think about it? I thought, you know, if you're going to the fucking supermarket and buying a package of meat, you're no, you know, let's not kid each other.
Either you're eating meat or you're not. And yeah, if you're going to eat it, it's probably even better if you kill it yourself.
They don't process it. You know, it's not like animals don't kill each other.
That's always been my moral justification. I just don't believe in torturing animals until we kill them.
Man, I don't think you need to torture them. But they do.
Not at all. That's what factory farming is.
Torturing pigs and chickens and cows until, it's just like. Well, you know, there's a lot of gray area and all that.
I mean, I would imagine america is disgusting well they gotta they gotta work on it i think so they gotta work harder well they do and don't they don't care it's profit why you have friends in the pig industry man i got friends everywhere okay well you should tell them i got friends in the pig industry well tell them to put a crowbar in their wallet and pry out $10 million, and they won't live any worse if they don't fucking torture the pigs. Because pigs are very smart.
They know what's happening. Well, I know people in the pig industry, and I'll take that info in.
Listen. You didn't think you were going to get it on that on this episode of 60 minutes did you no man i i i think that's what it's all about um here here in your side my thoughts on like i said with the elk stuff i it just uh elk is lean right very lean and and and all of the stuff of wild game and right.
And, you know, cattle and all that. And like I said, I'm not even this guy that flies.
How do you eat your elk? Do you eat your elk? Man, we get most of it in hamburger. So you make like a burger out of it? We'll do burgers and then taco night and spaghetti night or bolognese night.
Oh. Man, we don't ever buy ground beef anymore.
Right.'s pretty but like i said i mean so when you go out there to to murder the elk um i love it i love it so you're there with your boys man you all got a gun and we got a boat you see we're? Is that true? 100%. Why? Because it makes it more of a sport? Because the animal is like, I respect you.
Before he goes? Here's the deal, man. When you have these elk or a herd animal.
Yeah. Well, if you go up to an elk herd and you have a gun, it's not hard at all to shoot an elk.

It's unfair.

I wouldn't say it's unfair.

Oh, please.

Well, listen, I mean, we as humans, we have the knowledge to make hunting unfair.

Well, it's unfair to begin with.

First of all, to call it a sport, it's a sport if a sport was the case where one team didn't even know the game was going on and the other team had all the... No, they do.
I mean... The other team knows the game's going on.
They don't know a guy's in there with a rifle. But look...
They see you and they run off and man, you're like... Yeah, that's true.
Yeah, yeah yeah that's true so but why kids do that the kids have failure failures in hunting that that's the big thing about hunting i mean they can figure out they can figure out a uh you know the codes hell there's cheat codes and they can go figure out what if you just if you shoot at the with your arrow you shoot at the elk, but you just nick his ear like Trump at the assassination.

Man, if you hit a...

And so it's like...

If you nick an elk in the ear, it don't even know, that might as well have been a mosquito bite to them.

Yeah.

Because, I mean, they're a tough animal.

But it's tough if you just wing it and it's got the arrow in it and it runs off because then it's got to live with the arrow. It gets home and the wife is like, what happened? Man, let me tell you.
Dude, you can hit an elk not properly and that elk's fine. Yeah, look.
No, they're so tough. I mean, and then the beauty of bow hunting and all that is when it comes together perfectly and the elk doesn't suffer.
The elk runs 20 yards. And then at that point, you've got to pack the elk off the mountain.
Okay. So, Bill, check this out.
Okay. You go through all that.
Well, then you have hiked eight miles a day for four days. You shoot an elk.
Elk dies right there. Clean.
You're like, perfect shot. Then you got to pack that damn thing five miles off the mount.
What do you mean pack it? You've got to quarter it up in the field. Quarter it up.
Quarter it up. Cut it.
Cut it up. Cut it into quarters.
Cut it into quarters. What do you use for that? Knives and— Ben Salmon's bone saw? No, you know you just get real sharp blades, and you carve the animal up.
Right through the ribs and every other— Man, you don't—you go along the ribs for the back strap. You quarter out.
You do leave the ribs and the carcass, the neck, but your shoulders from here, your back straps, your tenderloins, and then all the- What do you do with the head? Whoever killed it totes the head out. That's the heaviest part.
What do you put it in? Like a hat box? No, you tote it on your shoulders. The head? The head.
What do you mean tote it on you? What do you put it in? No, you... You get blood all over you if you don't...
All over you. And you want that? That's just the way it is.
Jesus, what a bunch of redneck. And I mean that in a good way, but wow.
Really, you want the blood all over you? I wouldn't say you want it, but it just happens. I got an important hunting question.
You see the elk, okay? You're there with your boys. Right.
You all got your bows ready. Does one guy, do you decide one guy takes the shot, or do you all empty your clip like the L.A.
Police Department? No, really. Does one guy take the shot, or do you all take the shot at the same time?

Man.

What?

I'm asking.

Well, with us, we, you know, like I said, my nephew the first year,

it was his turn and not everybody gets an elk every year.

Oh, I see.

It's his turn.

What's that?

It's his turn. You's that? It's his

turn. You said it.
You go by turns. You said it was his turn to shoot the elk.
My nephews, yes, sir. Yeah.
So like now he got that one next year, it's your turn or one of the other boys? Yes, sir. Well, again, I can't judge it because I eat meat.

What?

I'm telling you.

I don't judge it.

I only judge torturing animals, not killing them.

They kill each other.

To me, that's a moral position.

I know my friends at PETA, and I'm a board member.

Yeah, great.

Yeah.

I know they don't agree.

They're vegetarians. But look, the science, frankly, is just not out on that.
There's no real evidence that we shouldn't be eating meat as human creatures. You know, our ancestors did it.
And— Well, I mean, you know, I think there's so much stuff. I think people just do what they got to do to survive in their different environments.
And yeah, it's also, it's also an economic issue. Poor people eat at McDonald's for a reason, because it fills you up.
It tastes great, kills you eventually. But, you know, people are thinking about the end of the month, not the end of their life.
You know? And, but, no, I don't, look, I always loved playing the Red States. Because I would get a crowd that was hip, smart, but didn't have that fucking woke stick up their ass.
you know? And you felt that there?

In some cities.

Right. You know, it got better in recent years, even in like woke places like San Francisco, because the crowd understood that I was going to give them what we agree on, which is we're not conservatives, but we don't just pretend that woke nonsense isn't nonsense.
And they want to hear that. I mean, Trump is changing America in the last two days, like overnight.
And look, I didn't agree with a lot of the stuff, but the leftists, they invited this by overreaching on the other side. He's getting rid of all DEI.
Well, they went too far the other way. They put DEI everywhere.
They left the border open. Like you look at the chart for like this president, like Clinton and Obama and Bush, Trump, it changed very little.
And then Biden, of course they're going to overreact to that. They invited it on themselves.
So yeah, I mean, in recent years, it's been great because I get that crowd. But yeah, there were times when I was in San Francisco.
I hate to pick on them, but there are places that are very wokey thinking,

God, I wish I was in Alabama.

Because that crowd laughs, but they don't have,

they're not pretentious, you know?

They're basically liberal, but they don't,

they're not too politically correct. And comedy is not politically correct.

Yeah, I mean.

Or else it's not comedy.

You know what I mean? My grandfather was a Southern Democrat. I mean, that was just what he was.
All Democrats used to be, I mean, all Southerners used to be Democrats. Used to be Democrat.
Kennedy changed that. And, you know, I remember it was just, you know, that was a thing.
And then growing up in a Republican household, I mean, it was, but man, you know, it just, I don't know. In the South, we just, I don't think we really care that much.
I mean, we just want to wake up. Right.
We just want to wake up. First of all, people have to understand, politics mostly comes out of like your personality and where you were born and raised.
You know, it's just deeper than just we're the good people and anyone who thinks differently isn't. It's just not that simple.
It's just so annoying, that attitude. And I live amongst it because this is the epicenter of it, Hollywood, that terrible attitude.
But yeah, most people just, first of all, they don't want to think about it at all. When Biden got elected, that was really his big pledge was, if you elect me, you don't have to start, you don't have to keep thinking about Donald Trump and all this stuff.
Of course, that was a pipe dream because Trump never went away and then he won the election again. So we never stopped thinking about it.
But most people, they would like to stop thinking about politics because it doesn't really, in their view, affect their lives. Government can help their lives.
They usually don't recognize when it does. They very well note when it doesn't.
But basically, would they even know who was president a lot of the times? Many times. In many households, not.

And they want to just get back to that.

And I can't blame them.

I can't blame them.

It's too on people's minds.

They put it in their social media.

They put it in what they write on Facebook.

And so we're always like cockfighting each other. Yeah.

You know, like making that.

And we don't have to. We can just talk about murdering animals.
Which I'm not against if you eat them. Well, and like I said about what we were saying, man, it's hard to get everybody together on the same stuff in this country.
And it just takes time and it takes work. So what's it like playing in L.A.? Man, I love it.
Where do you play here? Well, I played Hollywood Bowl. Oh, that's a big arena.
Several times. That's great.
I played the Dodgers Stadium. Well, that's big.
Which was. Dodgers Stadium.
Wow. Dodgers Stadium.
I mean so that that goes back to what i tell you with um you know new jersey and i mean thinking new jersey and then coming out here and playing dodger stadium i was like it was just so just so trippy too i i got into cycling and i cycled up a big hill that morning and stood out over the stadium looking down. And shoot, I was like, damn, that's Dodger Stadium, and I'm playing it.
Anytime you're playing a place whose last name is Stadium, you did well. Man, it's so amazing.
It all came out in the wash for you. Gosh, great.
Did you ever worry? Because I always feel like music is, you know, the muse is sitting on your shoulder. And sometimes he sits there for one hit.
You've heard that term, one hit, one hit. Yeah.
And sometimes, like you, and not just you, but he's there for a while. But you just have to worry, like, is the next one going to come? Because it's not something you can control completely.
No, I mean, you just do your best to try to write a great song. But you actually try.
You don't wait for it to come.

Well, I do that also.

I take songs. I love the songwriting community in Nashville and the fact that they can send songs to me.
And so I love trying to record a little bit of Nashville's, what their songwriting community has. But so, yeah, it's, you know, you wake up every day trying to make great music.
And sometimes you... Just because it's a fickle industry.
Well, it's tough. And you can't, right.
And, you know, with kids on Idol, man, they're up there singing in front of us. And we try to get them to this level and that level but man they got to go to work after that where it just doesn't work yeah i mean look at what you worked as a comedian and then look at when you do you do a funny one funny joke what on tiktok and then you're a funny comedian, but you did a million bad ones.

I did.

I had my version of playing those rock and roll bars that you played.

Right.

I played a million small clubs.

I played bars, which is not even a place a comedian should be.

I played with no stage, standing on a floor with sawdust on it.

I mean, oh, yeah.

But you had it. I had it.
It's the best thing in the world that could happen. So good.
And I had fun the whole way. I've never not had fun.
I mean, I think it was more fun for you than me. It's less fun for a comedian in that stage.
Really? Yeah. I think music, even if you're in a little shitty place, first of all, girls still come for you.
A comedian, you're just a loser. And very often, they're just not listening or, you know.
In that stage. Yes.
It's a sacrificial lamb kind of a thing. God, you spent how many years having to? I mean, not that many in that really.
But you learn. It just toughens you.
It's the only way you can learn. Toughens, yeah.
I mean, man, I had, I mean, you had bad shows. Oh, yeah.
And no one was videoing them. Jesus, could you imagine if they'd have videoed them, those bad ones? Yeah, well, that's one reason I got off the road just now because, I mean, among other reasons, like I don't trust the crowd anymore.
Everyone is just out there to get a scalp. You know, they tell them to turn the phones off.
Now, you could collect the phones. Some people do that.
But I really don't want to do that to the audience. Most of them, I feel like it would be an insult.
I feel like my audience are my friends. They could be my friends.
They think like me. It's just not something you would get from just a random sampling of the people out there.
So I don't want to insult them like that. But every once in a while, or somebody who's directly hostile to you, can film your show, take things of context.
And also, you're pushing boundaries. You know, he crossed the line.
Yeah, that's my job, to cross the line. And how do I know where the line is sometimes until I cross it? You should thank me for crossing the line and every comedian who does it.
Right. You have to cross the line.
You do. Look at Johnny Cash.
That's what he had to do. I crossed.
No, I walked the line. I walked the line.
But, man, God. Have you ever seen Walk Hard? You know, I've never.
It is the funniest. If you haven't seen it or saw it once, watch it.
Was it riley yes you know that's probably his only movie i haven't watched from top to bottom oh you have to it's about your industry it's about the music it's hysterical i've seen clips it's judd apatow it's fantastic oh you got to watch it it's a scream he you know he's johnny cash at the beginning right and then but then they take it into the 60s so he meets the beatles he goes through his dylan phase his bob dylan phase which is very apropos now with uh have you seen the dylan movie i hadn't seen it yet i want to see it me too i love the the previews have really looked good it's out now though, though, right? Yeah. Are you a Dylan fan?

You know, in my household, we didn't, you know, I just heard Dylan kind of on the peripheral. I didn't really, I just never really got a chance to listen to him.
And through the years, I wouldn't say I was a, you know, I wouldn't say that I was a big Dylan fan, but God, when you look at, you know, when, like the band, didn't he write, Take a load off, Annie? I think he wrote that. Well, that is a band song.
That's called The Weight. The Weight, yeah.
I mean, did Dylan write that? He wrote so many songs sometimes where you'd think, oh, wow, Dylan wrote that because it wasn't a hit for him. I mean, sometimes he was well served, I think, by somebody else singing his song because he had a, I don't, they make fun of his singing voice.
It was certainly unique. It's obviously like beyond charismatic because he's Bob Dylan.
So if you didn't hit every note perfectly, but he's actually, you know, he does hit, it's not like he sings clams. He sings in his own very distinctive way.
Yeah, but I never, I thought I liked his voice. I thought it's certainly not Robert Goulet.
Not everybody can be and not everybody can be. Not everybody should be.
Well, when you look at, you know, Paul Simon through the years. I mean.
Love him. Gosh.
Oh. So.
So that's somebody who like. Well, I wouldn't say I'm a crazy Paul Simon fan.
I am. I'm a crazy Paul Simon fan.

But I know enough that, man, what a career he built.

Both lyrically and music.

Totally.

Like, very few people write lyrics, I think,

that stand up as poetry without the music.

He is one of them.

Totally. I mean, when you think about Paul Simon and, I mean.
What? Well, I was going back to Dylan. You sound like a broad James now.
Well, I was going back to Dylan and Simon, and then, you know, those guys and James Taylor who, James Taylor, these guys are not like, they're just not like a Robert Plant. They're not like a Robert Plant type singer.
Robert Plant was, you know, no one. I mean, he was just the greatest.
Well, then you look, you know, but Paul Simon and singers like that could make it. Then Robert Plant could do that.
It's just funny how everybody can find their little niche

as long as you've got something that's your niche

and you've set yourself.

I mean, I've heard a lot of collabs.

I've never heard like heavy metal and country.

That seems one that's sort of elusive.

Like I can't imagine like Robert Plant, you know,

doing something with you.

Well, he and Alison Krauss did some stuff together.

Well, that's jazz.

I'm sorry. like Robert Plant, you know, doing something with you.
Well, he and Alison Krauss did some stuff together. Well, that's jazz.
She's jazzy. She's bluegrass.
She is? In her core. Well, maybe, but Robert Plant in later years was less Led Zeppelin-y.
When they were like, da-da-da-da-da-da, you know, they hit an E chord and the world was shaking. You know, I mean, Led Zeppelin, that's when I was in college.
I mean, you know, the country rap thing works. Hell yeah, it does.
But I'm not sure about country heavy metal. It might.
I'm trying to think. I mean, Jay-Z did rap with like he did 99 problems with i think um was it rage against the machine somebody like that that was kind of heavy metal but that but i could see why rap and heavy metal can go together country i don't know you know i'm gonna go through my mind but i but I bet, gosh, there's been some CMT crossover stuff.
There's so much more collabing than when I was a kid. When I was a kid, you know, Tommy James and the Shondells, like— They all tried to kill each other.
What? Well, I mean, back in those days of music, man, those artists didn't like—I mean, they were out hunting. I mean, they were out working to be better than the other.
I mean, it was cutthroat. It was.
Yeah. Yeah.
I mean, it was, I don't know about cutthroat, but it was competitive. Very competitive.
And there was no like, you know, hey, the Fifth Dimension, why don't you come on my record? Like, fuck off. I'm doing my own record.
your record but now like nobody puts out a record old man there's a lot of them and i yeah there's a lot of collabs out there but people love it people just love you do it yeah i mean i i mean what about dolly parton i hadn't done anything with dolly why it's an insult to you well i wouldn't say that. Well, I would.
Why haven't you collabed with Dolly Parton? It just hasn't happened. I mean, I've met, I've seen Dolly in concert.
Man, she's, you know, I just, it hasn't happened yet, but it might happen after, you know, Bill, you're so adamant about it. Absolutely, Iant so i'm a one issue candidate luke has to do a fucking collab with dolly well who was your favorite collab that you ever worked with when you did a collab um gosh um i don't know you know Early on, I did a collab with FGL Florida Georgia Line and it was a fun call this is how we roll it was really fun um um I've got a just a few people what's that may I suggest a few people who's that still he didn't Dan.
Whoa. Oh, you're reeling in shit.

Reeling in the years.

Is it?

Yeah, you're reeling in the years.

So good.

Great.

Right.

Okay.

Well.

The guitar solo and that.

I mean, that was a two-man group.

One of them's gone, so, you know.

I don't think I can get in there with him.

Steve Miller Band. Come on.
Classic. group one of them's gone so you know i don't think i can get in there with him steve miller band come on what you know classic oh what's their song um the joker yes come on there's a little country in that song it is i mean totally you really draw your inspiration from a really wide range and yeah never asked to didn't even mean to to.
It was just whatever my sisters and her friends and, man, whatever they listened to. But I mean, you seemed to be the product of all that, the whole range of the American songbook.
Hell, I remember, you know, Prince. Yeah.
When Prince had that damn album where he had the jeans cut out of his ass cheeks. I was like.
I don't remember that one. I think that was a picture.
I don't remember it. Maybe you imagined that or somebody sent it to you.
I promise you referenced it right now. But I was like, is this crazy? I used to have a poster of him around.
Prince was damn crazy. Yes.
What an animal. Prince, I mean, very few people have wettened pussies like Prince at five foot two, bitch.
Five foot two. And very, I mean.
Gangster. I know, very gangster.
I mean. Five foot two.
Trust me, I knew women who knew him. I knew women who talked about him.
And that five foot two, you know, for all the women who were on, you know, whatever the dating site is where they're like, well, you know, Tinder, I wouldn't go out with a guy who wasn't six foot tall. Yeah, you would.
I know one you would. He was the pussy whisperer.
He really was. And then he got into, you know, he was a big fan of my first show, Politically Incorrect, The Sign is Behind You.
And he used to talk about it, like publicly. It was a show with four guests, and he would, I was told, he would, this is after he became a very serious Jehovah Witness, I think it was, but something, he was very, very religious.
And he would bring, like, four strippers back from the club, and they thought there was going to be an orgy. And he'd just do an episode of Politically Incorrect with them, and they'd talk about jesus um yeah yeah so a little tidbit for you i don't know if that's true but that's somebody who knew him told but i know he really yeah he became well he definitely became super religious i didn't know that right and the god was fentanyl unfortunately no that's that's that's not too soon uh no he was very, you know, he became, was fentanyl, unfortunately.
No, that's not too soon.

No, he was very, you know, he became, you know,

had some very interesting theories about history.

Yeah, gone too soon.

Yeah, I mean. Gone too soon.

Whitney, geez.

But so many.

I mean, how many rock stars have fallen to drugs? And I always want to just get one of them to say, to ask, rock star, you're given so much just by being a rock star. You know this.
You have so much. Why then need like this level of drugs that's going to kill you? Man, I hate that.
It's just, and it happens so many times. Like, I just want to say to them, you don't have to be doing that well to do the amount of drugs you're doing that's enough to kill you.
Like, you could probably do it on like maybe 400 grand a year. You could probably buy enough Coke and liquor and fentanyl or whatever with that salary to kill yourself.
And you're making way more than that. And you're still, you know, I don't know what they're, what is this sorrow that they're dampening down? Sorrow.
And I'm sure there is. I mean, I don't doubt that people have their own pain, no matter how much it looks from the outside, like everything's great.

But you just have to explain to me, okay, everything actually is great.

Yeah.

I mean, you have so much.

What's the problem?

What is the problem?

Why are we doing the drugs?

Why do we need to forget?

Forget.

I want to remember this life, and I even have had it. Man forget i want to remember this life and i even have had it man i want to remember it yeah i mean well you seem like you have your head on very straight i hope so you know yeah it's a who's your like kitchen cabinet friends who you could just like lay it all out with oh man i've got a great got a great friend group I've got.
You must have, some of them must be your peers because like the only people who really understand you on a certain level are not your high school friends. Yeah.
They're the people who also play stadiums. Yeah, well, my thing, my high school, I got some high school friends that are like, they're just so tight.
And one of them, he and I are in some businesses together that are doing really well and just so thankful of that. And then I've got, man, I got high school friends and a little group of college friends that, you know, we try to get together.
Who are your peers? My peers, man. That you, you know, can like.
I would say my peers in country are probably very early on. Dierks Bentley was a very dear, you know, a peer of mine.
But he's not as big as you. Well.
So you have to like have people who understand what your life is. Nobody like that? Well, yeah, yeah.
Like Blake Shelton or somebody like that. Somebody who understands what your life is.
Oh, man, me and Blake, we have a good time together. See, I told you.
I knew it. You and Blake.
We have a good time together. What do you do? Me and Dierks.
beer and murder animals let me guess i'm letting it i feel like i've walked into the bill mar i trap of doom i love it i love that we're different me too you know i mean and fuck it we're not even that different. Man, I tell you.
We're not that different. We do slightly different versions of the same.
Well, we're, you know, man, I think we're all Americans and we're all. Well, the main difference is more generational.
We're living still in the real world. We're all American.
Younger generation is living in the virtual world that's going to be the main

difference yeah whether your girlfriend is an ai fucking app on your phone or whether you're actually you know the other way the old let's call it call it women classic well anyway god you know but it's a lot to handle and control. And the beauty of it is you get to fight your fight and not your fight.
You get to tell you through comedy and you get to tell yourself through satirical. I mean, you go after it and you take your love.
We're both so lucky, right? Hell yeah. I mean, we could have been, you know, not that other jobs are bad or horrible or boring, but a lot of jobs are bad, horrible, and boring.
And we don't even have jobs. We have careers.
Some people have careers and some people have jobs. I've had plenty of jobs when I was young and I didn't like them because they were fucking jobs.
If you have a career as opposed to a job, you are lucky. Very.
And that's what we got. Well, there's a lot of hardworking people out there.
Yeah. And we worked hard.
What do they want? They just wanted them. And we worked hard, too.
Don't take that away from me. Just because I enjoy it, and I still work hard at it.
And I bet you you do, too. How often are you, like, in the studio? You know.
I bet a lot. We're in the studio you know um i bet a lot we're in the studio quite a lot you know we we have um you have a thing at your house or you thing at the house guys drive out piano guitar amps and man we we you know we ride out there and it's fun you know we right.
So you have an in-home studio?

I've got a room in my house that I've got my pianos and stuff like that.

Are they sitting on actual bales of hay?

You know, the donkeys come up.

Do you have furniture?

The donkeys come up, you know, the dam.

We serve our freshly slaughtered eggs and chicken.

And I understand the Uber driver is a tractor.

All right.

I'm going to release you back into the wild to murder more animals.

Oh, listen.

I'm going to go back to work on my show.

Thank you.

Such a pleasure.

I hope it's not the last time.

Club Random. Thank you.
Such a pleasure. I hope it's not the last time.

I'm a pat rack, you know. Oh, listen, it's a able to.

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