Mike Tyson | Club Random Classics with Bill Maher

Okay folks, we are digging into the vault and pulling out some of our favorite episodes from the last four years which we're calling Club Random Classics. What else would we call it?

Starting September 18th, every third Thursday, we're dropping episodes that prove good conversation still exists, occasionally interrupted by profanity or an unexpected life lesson, or, you know, I've OD'd once or twice, but you'll see them all.

We're kicking things off with a singular guest, a man who can talk ancient history with surprising detail, who has first-hand knowledge of farting tigers, who still flies commercial despite global fame.

Can we guess who this is yet? He's got a big fight coming up, I think, with Floyd Mayweather.

And who you definitely don't want to cross mid-flight, Mike Tyson. Yes, Mike Tyson.
This episode originally aired May 9th, 2022. Ah, those Halcyon days.

Well, buckle up and don't forget, every third Thursday, we'll release another club random classic. And you can always dive into the back catalog for more conversations you won't want to miss.

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Mike, I have to ask you the question the whole world wants to know. Why are you flying on JetBlue? My wife says the same thing.
And you said it was your favorite airline.

I was just about to ask you, why is it your favorite airline? It says the same thing.

What are they doing on JetBlue?

I love JetBlue. I don't know why.
I got the term.

I mean, Stevie Wonder used to love the holiday inn.

No, you know why? Why? Because everything was in the same place.

Well, maybe I just love Jeb Love.

It's comfortable. Yeah, I don't fly anymore.
I love it.

That's why

my wife is like,

she wants me always in a private plane. My wife said, why don't you just, she has to, she can't fathom it.
Mike, sell like one tiger. And you could probably just fly whatever airline you want.

I know. You got rid of the tigers.

You had tigers, though, right? Yeah, tigers. My had a bunch of cougars.
Yeah,

that's wrong.

I'm an animal lover. Oh, yeah, absolutely.
100%.

100%, but you had tigers in captivity. That can't be good for the tiger.
No, no.

They weren't in captivity. They slept in my bed with me.
What are you talking about?

I got 500 pounds in the bed with me, man. What are you talking about? So you're saying that cave.

Well, I mean, they're not, I mean, you're right. You know, I've always thought about animals.
Have you ever smelled the tiger fart? No. You got to evacuate.
I would have had a what, 15,000 square.

I got to evacuate now. You got to open up everything, close people to blow everything out.
Seriously? Y'all, man, the worst thing about it.

The level of it or the extreme stench of it? Both.

Both tell you you can't nothing you can. Well, what were you feeding the tiger that it was farting so badly? Don't you think

horse meat? Is that what they eat? Yeah, they love horse meat in check. Oh, so you killed horses and kept tiger.
Stop. I never killed a horse in my life.
Well,

where'd you get the meat?

I pay for it, but listen.

Somebody killed it. Yes, yes.

The horses that they send to, what do you call the glue factory? The glue factory, yeah. Those guys that can't do it anyway.
Mike, where do you stand on horse fighting as a legalized sport?

Horse fighting. I'm just making Horse fighting.
Just fucking with me.

Horses do fight. Remember that horse bit the other horse in the air?

He did a Mike Tyson. I was going to say.

The other horse was winning. He was mad.
He bit in the air and tried to pull him back. But see, I love this that you love JetBlue because I always thought of you as like the people's champ.

You know, I mean, when you, first of all, people call you champ and they should, because champ is like, it's like when you're president, they call you president even after you're out of office senator governor there is a guy's out of over 20 years governor and you always will be champ

but i learned something with my last experience i'm on the plane i learned i don't belong to me

too many people you just learned that yes

my right hand of god mike you've been famous no but listen I never know that my actions affect so many people. They worry.

No, they inspire people, though. A lot of your actions have inspired people.
I mean, you're... But just that fact that people worry.
They see the incident and they just worry.

But Mike, your Broadway show, which I saw on TV,

but I don't live near Broadway. Fantastic.
And it inspired people.

I like to continue.

You don't know that? You must know that about your life or else you wouldn't have done that job.

Sometimes that's my selfishness and not egos.

What is your selfishness? Just wanting to succeed and be happy, but hey, I want to keep myself to me.

That's not selfish. That's what we all want.

I mean, you have some obligation.

I have to realize that I don't belong to me anymore. You never did since you were 20 because you were.
I didn't understand that to now.

Like, when I got into that incident, so many people calling with worry, and I'm like, oh. That one douchebag on JetBlue did that after 30 fucking years of being in the spotlight.

Anyway, I just want to tell you, you really are, when I see people with you, because

the reaction is overwhelmingly in your favor,

you are like the people's champ. Like, remember they called Lady Diana the People's Princess.

You're like her.

But with fighting. But what am I going to do on a private plane? What are you going to do on a private plane? You got to jerk off if you want to.
I know, but exactly.

But listen, it's only me and people I know. I'm like one of those guys.
I'm like, I have to be seen. I have to be on the people.

Oh, is that right? Yeah, I'm like Magic Dancy. Is he like that?

Yeah.

It's a great documentary.

I can't be isolated. Mike, you got to see that HBO did a documentary about Bird

and Magic, like when they were playing against, you know, the 80s.

It's fantastic because they're such opposite personalities, but they came to quite love each other.

Bird's badass, though. Yes, he is.
And he kept

my serious guy.

He didn't want the spotlight. Legitimate.

And Magic only wanted the spotlight. And he talks about when they were in Barcelona at the 92 Olympics, remember, the first dream team, basketball team?

And he said, we were in the hotel, we were getting mobbed. There was a side door you could go out that they told us and no one would bother you.
But Magic didn't want to use the side door.

That's who he was. And that's great.
But

you're not obligated to do that. They don't own you.
They own your work because you put it out in public and shared it. They don't own you.

Your family owns you. My mind is just,

my mentality is jet blue.

Does that make sense? And apparently, your travel plans also include jet blue.

No, I mean, that's love, Mike. I have not flown commercial like practically in this century.
The second I can get off.

Of course. And I used to hide it because I thought, oh, it makes me look terrible with the the environment.
You know what?

Let me say it, but the kids, they have to care about the environment more than me because it's their planet they're inheriting. And they don't.

They worship Kylie Jenner, who never does anything but flies on a private plane. So when Kylie gives up the plane, I'll give up mine.
How about that?

You have a drink? Do you drink? Yeah, some water. Oh, my God.
You have a bag of plane. Jesus, my.

How's the business going? How's the puck business? You love it?

Hey, listen, right? It gave me a new life. You love it? Yeah.
Yeah.

I noticed you don't keep that lip, though. I know.

My friend said, they play football and pass, man. You told me the joy.
Yeah.

But so how, how do you, do you go into an office every day with the pot business?

Do you like, are you CEO Mike and you sit at the big desk and you're like, and you, and you, and you, and Jenkins, how does Vice President Jenkins sound?

If we can get quarterly numbers up, I'm hands-on. Listen, I don't look at it, I am.
I don't look at myself as a boardroom guy, but I am

on paper. But that's not, I have to be with, I have to be in the streets with the people.
That's how I'm effective. I'm not effective in the room.

Right. Well, you are.
And also, it's wasting the great ambassador for the product. Exactly.

I'm just a street guy. I like the work.
I'm a worker. Yes, you are.

And

what do you, like when people say,

what has it done for you? Like, what is your testimonial? What is your love letter to marijuana that has made you want to actually be in business with it? Hey, listen, you know what?

You could just, I don't even have to go through a big discussion about a dissertation. You can just ask my family,

am I a better guy with it or without it?

And they would tell you 100% with it.

I'm with it. Oh, man.
You're definitely with it. I am like, oh, I never knew that I'm a moody guy.
You know, I thought I was a great guy and stuff. I never knew how moody guy.

You didn't know you were famous and you didn't know you were moody. Well, I never knew it.
Mike.

Well, I always knew I was famous, but I didn't know that to that effect. My selfishness is like, I want to love this.
I want to be into this.

Well, you know what? When you're the heavyweight champion of the world,

even if you're a non-charismatic guy, you're very famous.

But when you're charismatic, like you are, you know, when you have that, you know, X Factor, you could also like, you know, you did your turn in

the hangover. But, you know,

you could be in movies. You know, you could fucking do what The Rock does if you wanted to.
Probably do it better. You know, you got, not that he's not good, but, you know.

And I am going to do that stuff. We're getting ready to do.
You are? Oh, yeah. We're getting ready to do my life stuff.

We're going to do this without anybody we put my own money up we're just gonna do this stuff

yeah you look great by the way you look you really grew into your what are you 50 55 50 double nickel yes

no you look

the tattoo has has grown in nicely in age I feel you know um

I never thought by doing this, I never knew I would live to see so many other people with it.

I know exactly.

Right. When you did it, it was very, very.
You had to have been a hell's angel or something like that. Right.

Prison or something. Outrage.
It was very out there

to do that. And you're right.
Tattoos, you know, they are moving like a fungus up the body. And they're on the neck, and now they're on the face, and they're kind of taking over, I feel.

You know, listen,

you think about it.

2,000 years ago,

all of our ancestors were all tattooed up. They were? Yeah, absolutely.

What was those guys? I'm not sure we had the same ancestors

2,000 years ago. No, what was those guys

that the Romans was always trying to garlic? They were all tattooed up.

The Romans did what? No, when they

conquered? They don't know, but they crossed the Rhine and they conquered.

Yes.

Well, they crossed the Rhine, but then... It was Caesar.
It was Julius Caesar.

Julius Caesar conquered Gaul. Yeah, that was Gaul.
And he fought Jason Dredrix, the guys who they conquered this fight. Well, actually...
Ketrix, Ketricks. Jason Getrix.
Who is he?

Ketrix is the leader of Gaul that fought Julius Caesar.

Oh, I don't know that name. What is his name? Ketricks.

You sure we're... I'm absolutely positive.
Okay.

Okay, so

he fought Julius Caesar, but

Julius Caesar died, and then they tried to go on the other side of France, Gaul, is Germany. They never got to

the Roman Empire was halted at

9 AD, the Battle of the Hurtenberg Forest, right?

Because that's where Hermann the German defeated, I think it's Valier.

Valence. Valence, correct.
The Roman Emperor. That's as far as they got because when they got into Germany, they found the tribes were super tribal.
But they got

in order to do that they were warring tribes but they all

and the guy who

was who defeated him

that Herman the German guy he had been taken in by the Romans and raised yeah all those guys the Romans come and they

take all the kids and they raise them and they enslave them they use them in the army So so this is your this is a passion of yours history obviously you obviously read history.

I just know it.

Well, you must have read it somewhere.

Yeah,

I used to always read about boxing history, and then it went,

right from the beginning of it, and then it got involved with gladiators, slaves. Right.
And then it won't. That led you to Rome.
Yeah, and it got really into it. All roads lead to Rome.
Exactly.

And do you know there was gladiators that won their freedom tense 20 times, but they couldn't stop the adrenaline. You mean they wanted to...
They could have left, but they...

They won their freedom, yeah, so many times. Boy.
But they couldn't, the addiction of the people. They were like fighters today.
They were celebrities. Gladiators were celebrities.

Athletes still always say that, you know, I did it for the game. Oh, fuck you.

You did it for the game. You did it for you.

You know, I gave everything to game.

But this is what I found out. Nothing's bigger than the game.
The game's the platform for everybody.

Well, again, but see, your platform

is really

primus inter paris.

There's a lot of things,

but

something

very primal about going into a ring with another man and punching each other in the head is like it puts it above as far as interest level. You know, it's just,

it's just, it gets to it in a very deep way. Like, and it's very clear who the winner and the.
But the fighters don't look, the fighters look, how can I outsmart this guy?

It's not ever what it appeared to be. It looks like two guys killing each other.
But the whole objective is, how do I outsmart this guy? You think that's it's always about outsmarting.

That's how you get it. Because when you're young and you're a kid, you win because you're stronger.
But when you're at the top of the game, you only win because you're smarter. Right.

But you have to be smart at the beginning, too, I would guess. Absolutely, but it's from experience, but I'm talking about the top of the game.
Being number one, it's only because you're smarter.

Right, I'm sure. But weren't you the one who said everybody has a plan until they get hit? Absolutely.
You know, that's a great quote. Absolutely.
Everybody has.

Absolutely. and see here's even with me with everybody and life in general we we have to realize that um

things can happen what um what's that happen should happen it should happen if it could happen it would happen

but here's my guess about you like now i know

is it jake paul wants to fight you

Yeah, I'm going to call him sometime Friday and we're going to talk.

And what,

would you consider actually doing that?

Absolutely. You don't worry about fighting at your age, at 55?

Check this out. We were talking about Julius Caesar, wasn't we? Yeah.

He's the one that raised. He said 365 days is a year.
So before he was born, how did we tell our age?

Tell me about it. Is this a riddle? I don't know.
No, no, but really, Julius Caesar told us 365 days is a year. But before he was born, how did we tell our age?

By when the sun came back. No, how do you know that?

Because that's, you know, that's why we have, like, Christmas. Do you know why Christmas is December 25th? Why is that? Because the sun...
When God was born, that's when Jesus was born, I believe.

Well, that's when they said Jesus was born. Okay.

Even if he even existed as a historical figure, which we don't know. But the reason why Jesus...
Jesus? Yes.

Listen, you don't believe in Jesus like that? I'm a Muslim, but you don't believe in Jesus? I do not. I'm not an atheist.

But also. Well, you know what I wanted to say to you? What? When you were going...

I'm saying I've read about all the greatest conquerors in the world, and they conquered the world, and they still sent it. They frustrated.
They say, God, there's still something greater than me.

Well, when they got defeated, they said. No, no, no.
They defeated them. They conquered the world.
Right. And they said, God, there's still something greater than me.

Why? What would it be if they conquered the world?

That feeling that it's not, I'm not. Not enough? Yeah, no, it's that feeling that there's something greater than me.
It's just I'm,

you have to believe in something greater than you.

Well, I feel like if you're at the point where you've conquered the world, then your ego is in a place where you're not saying there's something greater than me.

And they did, many conquerors did set themselves up as gods on earth. So they thought they were God.
You know when they said there's something greater than me when they got their ass kicked?

Seriously, that's what I'm saying. Like, do you ever see Alexander the Great, the movie?

I know

you know everything about Alexander from what there is to know about him. Okay, well, I know a lot about it from Oliver Stone's movie.

I'm sure I learned it in college, too, but his was much more interesting. And Rosario Dawson was really great at it.
Yes.

And Angelina Jolie. And all really alley, he was scared of his mother.
Yes, Angelina Jolie. That's why he never went back.
He was scared to go back. His men men wanted him to go back.

He was scared of his mother. He kept in touch with his mother.
He was just a momentous boy.

Yes, that's how they portray it in the movie, that they almost had an

incestuous relationship.

No, she was just one of those first stage mothers. Napoleon's mother was the same way.
They was afraid of their mothers and stuff.

Well, yes. I mean, certainly sexuality in Roman times was quite different.
I mean, like, the way we talk about straight and

and now, of course, straight Roman, they do it right in the street. Everything right in the middle of the street.

Right now, everybody's screwing their sleigh, they're shitting in the street, everything right there.

Everything's in the street. That's why you say you're a man of the street.
It's disgusting. It's just right.
Yeah, it's a mess.

Roman's a mess. Desert Road's a mess.

Yeah.

Yes.

Hey, man, I need you to go.

I need you to go.

It's tough when you're trying to get a paper.

Yeah.

But when I say,

I'm a big, I'm sorry. No, no, no.
I'm a big fan of love letters. So I read some of the love letters from before the beginning of the time.
Like Plato had some love letters.

I read some of his love letters. Who's the love letters? Plato.
Oh, Plato. Well, that's Greek.
Yeah, but it's from the history of the world, the greatest love letters.

And so, you know, you read these. Well, I mean, Greek, the love letters could have been to a boy.
Yeah, exactly.

Okay, well, not that that's wrong, but I'm just saying they had a, you know, the pederast, that was a big thing back then, someone who took an interest in what today we would certainly

think is an inappropriate age. You know, that's what gladiators, gladiators really and all like that, were just fuck boys.
They fought, but they were fuck boys. You know what I mean?

They get sexually abused all the time.

The guards fuck them all the time, but you know, they'll kill you, but that's what they were. They were slaves.
It was

sex. well and after they had sex with the women you know what they said gladiator

i think they like men more than women back then

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So Caesar gets stabbed in 44 BC. Yes.
He crossed the Rhine.

The Rhine. He crossed the

Wonderful Life. Yes.

Like Grand Poobah, you know, with a big cheese, whatever it was, dictator. I mean, this is the theme in...
many countries.

And by the way, it's the theme they ripped off for the end, wisely, because it's a great story. But it was the end.
Have you ever watched Game of Thrones?

Game of Thrones is. I love the Game of Thrones.
You did? Okay, well, what is the end? What is the plot point? It's the Julius Caesar plot point.

In other words, the blonde girl who's like, she's benevolent, sort of, and then she becomes a dictator and they got to kill her. She's a bad chick, though.
Right?

Right.

But she took a knife in the belly the same way

JC did. Yeah, she had to go.

She had to go because she turned too powerful. Exactly, that's the Caesar story.
She was just a humble girl taking advantage of sexually next thing you know, she conquered the rights.

She's conquered and she got dragons.

No, she let the dragons go to her head. Yeah, yeah.

And she's the girl with the dragon tattoo.

Intoxicating. Power's intoxicating.

Power. It's intoxicating.
Power, exactly.

So

anyway, the Romans, sexually, though,

and the Greeks, but especially the Romans, they didn't have this, you know, oh, you're gay, you're straight. It was like, you're cute.
You know, I mean, like Mark Antony, very

macho guy, right?

Who part of the cabal that succeeded Caesar, right?

I mean,

he had, you know, the wife, and then he had the, you know, the concubine kind of mistresses, and then he had, like, 13-year-old boys. It was a very concerned.

I don't want to say, but, you know, because people say, what the fuck? Do you know homosexuals conquered the world? Homosexuals have? Yeah. I know they conquered West Hollywood.
No, I don't.

Forget that. I'm talking about warriors, gladiators.

They conquered the ancient world.

What do you mean? You're saying most of the people. Their tribe.

Conquering the world, went out to conquer the world. Which tribe? The Greeks, the Romans, or somebody.

But what?

They were gay? Yeah, they were homosexual, then they conquered the world. But see, you're saying they're homosexual.
And what I'm saying is there wasn't this concept back then.

No, that was homosexuality. No, listen.
Right?

Americans are the only

phobic people in the world.

That's ridiculous. There's many homophobic people.
Not like this place. How are you creating this? It's not like America.
Come on. What?

Every Muslim country in the world, you get thrown off of a roof.

Well, that's some extreme stuff.

That's extreme stuff. It's extreme stuff that a lot of...
Listen,

as a Muslim myself, I know this.

Everybody is worthy of

the mercy of God. I don't care what you did.
I don't think you have to be Muslim to believe that. No, no, but that's what I believe.
I am good. Good.
It's good to believe.

But that's not what we're talking about. I don't believe nobody should kill someone else.

Okay, but I got to correct the record about like intolerance or homosexuality is very much alive in the world today. It's more probably alive in Muslim countries.
I listen to this study this.

I'm talking about

a country. Russia is horrible with no, I'm talking about a country like this that takes everybody and we fight for everybody's rights and everybody's equal.

I'm talking about that country like that. All those other countries are, you know, they're kind of tricky, you know? Right.
But a country that promotes, hey, equal rights and all this crap.

Yeah, America has perfect. And then we got some crazy people.
Yeah, America is a

place with horrible sins in its past and its present. But, you know, if you look around the world,

there is perspective to that, too. I have perspectives, too, in America.
I think this is the best country in the world. Oh, there you go.
But listen, we're not perfect.

Agreed, of course. We're not perfect.
And we never will be. I mean, because

it's amazing, we're even still here, really, when you think about how primitive and how lizardy our lizard brains are. Listen, we can't even anticipate our next breath.
What? We can't even anticipate.

We can get that any moment. Right.
Life is fast.

I can't anticipate me another second talking to you.

Well,

hopefully it's going to be a good second. But, you know, sometimes when I get up in the night, like, to pee,

but no, I used to take something for that band. But listen, I used to get up and every day.
It's only once in the middle of the night. Oh, no, I'm like four times.

And long, too. It's long.
It's probably because Buster Douglas hit you in the kidney a million times. No, he is in the head.

What a kidney.

Your body is taking a beating, which gets me back to the fight.

Here's my thing about the fight. I worry about you.
I don't want you to, like, you have a really good brain and you're doing great things with it.

I would hate to see, you know, because here's my guess

about where you are. Like, I bet,

of course, at 55, you do not have the wind to go around the ring like a boxer in his prime does. You're also more brittle than you were at 25.

But my guess is the actual punch that you have is exactly as it was when you were at the jam. I don't think so.

No. But listen,

know why you believe all the stuff you said you're brittle? Because you believe that. I don't believe that.

Not at 55, a little more than at 25? You don't think your body was a little more rubbery?

I have to live my life different in that perspective, but I don't think that I'm brittle and I'm a

brittle friggin' guy. This guy's 25 and I better bend down and seen how it's going to be.
Okay, but like, you know what? I saw this movie with Stallone

and Schwarzenegger that they made recently. I mean, they're both punching 70 in the mouth, right? And like, it's some escape from prison movie, and they're fucking hitting each other with lead pipes.

I'm like, you guys, you're 68 that your body could not, I mean, at any age, but maybe at 25, you could come back from it.

Come on, you got to acknowledge that time, you know, it's a river. It flows, Mike.
It doesn't stop flowing.

Listen, it doesn't have to stop flowing, but maybe

you don't have to flow with it. You know, you just can't give up in life you can't get affordable

i can't

get up and pee in the night like i don't want to turn the light on because you know light is bad for sleep right really look sure when i need it because i'm gonna piss on the floor and everything

like i piss on my wife is so mad listen my wife come to go use the bathroom she sits down and said put on a thing i pissed all over the thing my wife oh my god

i'm under message no i'm serious no i'm serious my wife get up and say you're just a pig because I pissed all over the thing and I didn't pick it up. Well, okay, we can certainly work on this.

I feel like this is not domesticated. It's a totally

solvable problem. No, it's not.

All right.

Yeah, introduce me to your wife. We'll work on it again.

But here's the please I was going for is that like it's I want to keep it dark because when you get light in your eye, it tells your body to wake up.

So that's why your room should be completely dark when you sleep.

And i know what light so i know where everything is it's my house i piss there all the time so i don't really need light but i'm i'm doing this because i want to bump my head on the door or the door to the bath or whatever you know so

i always feel like that's life when you're moving forward everything is in the dark you can kind of see a little bit and you're using your hands to protect yourself like i don't think like i can't sleep sometime at night my wife will leave me alone i'm always thinking i'm jerking off i used to be one of those guys that listen, you know, come on, mom knows it.

I just can't do it.

I'm sitting for my wife. Hey, just leave me alone, okay? I got to sleep.
I miss, I go to bed at eight o'clock and wake up at two in the morning, can't sleep. But you like being married.

I love being married. Right, I know you do.
And sincerely, that's great to see it. Because so many people, when they're married, you know, you say, you know, what's it like?

And they're like, well, you know, it's a lot of work. They go right to sort of the.

There's no work.

Really?

No work. Your marriage is no work.
No, I'm talking about from the facts for Karen Bennett. There's no work.
Oh, God, she didn't give me a hard time.

That's fantastic. It's just, I like her to give me a hard time.
Right. You know what I mean? Imagine this.
That's what you have a wife for. Right.
You know what I mean? Right.

To make you, to remind you that you're a man. That's why you have a wife.
Yeah, to remind you that you're a man. They do? Yeah.
A lot of times they put your balls in their purse, though.

I mean, so there's also that side of it, you know.

Listen,

all the time they do. If you have that dependence on a woman like that, she got your balls.
But that doesn't mean it's a bad thing. Why is it a bad thing?

Maybe she just wants to comfort my balls or something. Well, that's a different thing.
I don't know about control. Yes.
I mean, that's a good thing. Manscaped.
We're always talking about balls.

I'm always promoting manscape, and we're talking about balls all the time. So you do that for your wife, you manscape, because it's...
I don't do, never, no.

I'm not a hairy person. I'm not hairy at all.
No, but the beard looks very good. I like the beard.

Like Light the beard. Like the beard.
Really good. Good look.

I'm not a hairy guy at all. Right.
Never were. Never had no hair.
That's interesting. So, okay, so you like being married,

and you're a Muslim. Yeah.

Is the whole family Muslim?

Some of my kids, but listen, it's my wife, and my kids, they have to choose what they want to be. Right.
They have to choose what they want. And you're okay with that.
Absolutely.

That is not a point of view that is even allowed in many, many Muslim countries in the world. There is one religion, it is Islam, and

they're not big on like, hey, you know what? Let's agree to disagree. But listen, I'm not Allah.

I know, I'm just saying

that's something you're allowed to do here as an American Muslim. No, I learned from experience.

I'm not going to stop their growth from something that my growth is extending with. Right.
I'm growing with it, but that's not their growth.

I'm just pointing out that this enlightened point of view is not found uniformly around the world. You know, you said America is the greatest.

That's one reason why one thing that's still great about America is that you can have that point of view.

You'd be surprised how many Muslims want to come in and think that we, the way we think about it. Oh, I'm sure they should.

Oh, I'm not surprised. You'd be surprised.
I'm not. And I mean,

and with this, and

all those guys in Iran and stuff, you'd be surprised these are gorgeous people. And women who don't don't want to wear the fucking, you know, whatever the

thing that looks like the cover of a motorboat. Well,

some people are more

modest than other people. Right.

I wish I had the dignity to be that modest.

Modest? Yeah. Why do you say that?

Because they believe in covering themselves. Oh.

And I'm like you said, I got to be, don't care how much money I got. I got to be in this cheap-ass plane with all these these people and talking to these people.

There's one thing, to honest, is one thing. Completely covering a woman so you don't see any of her that's not modest.
That's pathological. Suppose she's happy with that.

She's not, oh my god, she's not happy with it. I mean, you can brainwash someone into liking anything.
That's like,

what's that call again? My kids always say that's me whether the Stockholm trips. Stockholm said that.

My kids say that. My kids and my mother, my wife got Stockholm saying.

So your kids, how old are your kids?

They go from 33 to

11. Okay.
So I'm sure you have times and you're with all of them. Yes.
And I'm wondering what the discussion is like. Is it a lot of real shit? I'm sure it is.
Like you talk this kind of shit.

I don't know,

but you talk about, I mean, there's nothing that's off limits, right? No. You talk about sex with your kids.
You talk about religion. Everything.
Right. Everything.
Your past. Yeah, everything.

What do they say? Daddy, I saw YouTube. You were with this super fly.
Now they go like this.

And this is my kid now for 13 years.

What was wrong with you, Dad?

Why would you say something like that? No, but they must be very proud of you. Yeah, they're Mike Tyson.
They do, but my daughter's like one of these intellect kids.

And she's like, why would you say something like that? Right.

I mean, it's curious. She's right.
How old were you then?

It's just ridiculous that these things. All of us in our 20s are idiots.
You can't, yours just happens to be on tape and in front of the world. But we're all that way in our 20s, you know.

It's what's so frustrating about youth, but we were the same way, is that you want to tell youth you don't know anything yet, but because they don't know anything yet, they can't understand why that's good.

You know what?

The youth feel so good. You don't want to learn.
Right.

Nobody. This feels so good.
Why would I listen to all motherfuckers?

Exactly.

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Now you became a Muslim in when you... No, I was Muslim before.

Even before a person? Yeah, but it glamorized me, though, to be a Muslim. in prison.
By the way, I never thought you committed that crime. Hey, listen, I appreciate that.
No, no, no.

Not that it's important. No, but no, it is.
But listen, know what I learned? It was the best thing that happened for me. It was a great learning experience.
But you know what?

Back in the day, when this subject, because you're very famous, would come up in conversation and people would want to know my opinion, I'd always say, I don't think that was rape.

I think what Mike did was had sex with someone consensually and then wasn't nice enough after. Well, no, but listen.

Maybe you're guilty of that yeah but no one else and then someone gets angry i'm guilty because of things i've done and got away with before that was grimy right and um yeah that's what happened and that was just a wake-up call i mean that's things that i did do were bad to women disrespectful

that i got away with that i never got complaint with and this was one that it showed up

yeah it's coming i believe in karma some of my friends they come is bullshit i don't believe in that either

believe in commons my

So

a little kid gets molested. How's that comma? But I was telling you a million years ago why December 25th is not only Jesus' birthday, but the birthday of many gods in

that Mediterranean world before Jesus. They grafted that

December 25th onto his biography for a reason, because they were trying to sell a new product and it was familiar to people.

And it originated that way because the winter solstice is December 21st, right?

This is three days after the winter solstice. So what are you saying about Jesus?

That's what I want to know. I want to hear your opinion about Jesus.
That's pretty much what I'm trying to listen to. It's coming along, but it's coming along really intellectually.

I'm just going to tell you why it's December 25th. It's interesting.
It's four days after the winter solstice. Before there was science, on December 21st, it's the shortest day of the year.

The days keep getting getting shorter. The people were like, oh my God, life is going to end.
Every day gets shorter.

December 25th is the first day they can notice that the days are getting longer again. So it turned into a celebration day.
And that's why Jesus is on December 25th.

What? Aren't you glad I finished that? Yeah, but didn't Santa Claus, what was Santa Claus the mushroom do? Santa Claus Jesus, it's all the same thing. Anyway, what is my opinion of Jesus? No.
Well,

as a philosopher, he did do some revolutionary things. The meek shall inherit the earth was really revolutionary.
Of course, bullshit also, because they don't.

But what do you define as the weak? The meek.

What do you define as the meek, though? Well,

the meek are, you know,

certainly not the ballers and movers and shakers and egomaniacs and the, you know, the people who run the world.

Not the Alexander the Great. Great Alexander the Great wasn't meek

well how could he you're not meek

you know the meek some meek people

disguise their meek with masculinity

what do you mean some people who are

who we say are meek They see their circumstances, so they hide that with masculinity to accomplish their goals. Like, give me a specific example of that.

Say I'm a weak guy, right? And I'm looking around. Everybody,

they're following this particular lifestyle. This guy has to be a gladiator.
This guy has to be tough. So

I mask myself in that, in the toughness. I'm a tough guy now.

You know, it just goes, look, a guy like me. Listen, a guy like me.
No, look at me. What are you saying? This is you in this analogy? Yeah, it is.

It is. It is me.
Do you see yourself as a meek person? No, I look at myself as a guy that got my ass kicked and abused as a kid and picked on. And so what do you call that? Do you call that?

I never thought I could fight until somebody told me to fight.

I used to get beat up all the time and abused all the time. Yeah, then one day my friend said, fight them.

You got beat up? Absolutely. All the time.
Probably I'm 11 years old. Really? Yeah.
But then that's probably because you didn't...

You weren't big enough. You were being beaten up.
No, listen, I was this size at 12. You were? Yeah.
I was back here.

See, that's the year. Everything changed for you.
Yeah, everything changed at 12. Oh, really? Yeah.

So, I remember seeing all those documentaries, and you'd always be up there with the pigeons.

And, you know, as an animal lover, I kind of loved that. This is interesting.

This is an interesting phenomenon because

pigeon guys, it becomes a part of their soul. We have birds and we don't even know why we have them.
We have other people taking care of them. We just have to have our birds.
Who does? Pigeon people.

Oh, pigeon people, yeah. Yeah.

Oh, there's others? All over the world. Is that right? Yeah.

I'm the only one I've ever heard of was you. No, since the beginning of time.

I've heard of falconers, you know, that's a big thing where they land on the... Well, they use them because that's during the Crusades when they had the messenger pigeon.

So the Arabs use the falcon and they grab the pigeons and they can

see where the plans are and they can retract them down and intervene.

But pigeons, what is it about the pigeon as opposed to other flying things things that shit everywhere?

You know what it is. It's just that this is what crazy, they need you to protect them.
Most people that fly pigeons,

they got the image of a tough guy.

Because of you? No, no. As a little kid, if you flew some birds, you better not mess with that guy.
Most pigeon flying guys are like tough guys.

Because if I'm a little kid, I got birds. I can come here and take a look.

So you followed in that tradition. Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah, and something it's like,

maybe it's like you're this tough guy, but you want to show your gentle side, and you can do it with a, do you pet them?

Because birds are very dirty, aren't they?

They're cleaner than us. That's all they do all day is clean themselves.
Birds are cleaner than us?

All day they do is clean themselves. Right.
That's all they do all day is clean themselves. Could you talk to them about the shitting, though? Because I feel like it's just so much.

This is what you need to know. We're talking about ancient times again.
Ancient time pitting shit with the manure of the world. That's what.
I feel it is still in the manure of the world.

There's a lot of it. I think if pigeons shit on you, it's good luck.

People that fly pigeons can't wait. Their friends come up the first day, they get shitted on.
We're like, fuck. I'm up here for 10 years.
I don't get shitted on. You get shit on your friends.

But it is like they have permanent diarrhea. You know, I mean, it's, it's, I don't know.

It's because they eat so much. You know what else? Their shit is like acid.
If it goes in your car, it just eats right through your cars. Yeah, it's like

acid. It's like acid, yes.
Huh? Wow. You ought to do a science show.
Mike Tyson, the science guy.

I'm birds and though. No, and a lot of things, you know, do your history.

But, okay, so

the fight.

So who is this guy? Jake Paul? Yeah, yeah. Who is he? He's sensational.
What are you talking about? Well, you don't know who he is. I know the name and I should know more, and I apologize.

Treat me like an idiot.

I don't even look at him the way people say so I can't even say what they call him.

But he's not a fighter. Yeah, he's a fighter.
So he's a fighter. Yeah, but they don't want to credit him as being a fighter, though.
Why?

Fucking fucking white with blue eyes and blonde hair. Okay, I don't know, but

you know, white people hate blue eyes and blonde hair. Everybody wants to kill him.

That's what he's. But he can fight.

That's his thing. Everybody wants to kick his ass.
Don't care. Every nationality wants to kick his ass.
Kick this guy's guy's ass? Yeah, everybody wants to kick his ass. Why?

Because he's just some pisses everybody off. Because he's the looking and that too, but he's a great salesman.
Oh, great, great, great salesman.

Okay, so there would be massive interest if you fought him, not just a promoter. He's a great promoter.
He doesn't even know it. He's just naturally a great promoter.

What would the fight look like in your eyes when you picture it?

It would be fun. It wouldn't be.
A fun fight.

A fun fight.

Because, why? Because it would be so easy for you to... Nothing's easy.
I'll never look at this going to be either way kicking it. No, I don't look at life like that.
No.

See, you know what else I worry about as I talk to you, and I used to see you quite often at our friend Jeff Green's parties, you know, and you were always in a good mood, you know, when we were at a party.

But you seem to have a calmness and a true happiness now. I worry about being this focused, centered, happy in life, and then going into the boxing ring.

Because maybe what helps you in the boxing ring is being angry, right?

No, like I said, that's a terrible theory. The projection that you are angry is the whole objective.
It's all an act. Boxing is an act too.
It's just physical. It's all psychological.

How can I get on his skin? Maybe I should hit on his wife.

Something like that.

It's all psychological. And then after you do all that stuff, you piss them off and it's over.
Hey, I love you, brother. It's all good.

It's all strategy before you even get in the real.

So it sounds like what you're saying is like, you know, I know in many sports, if you just compared the athletes on a strictly physical level, you can't really tell which one would be the real champion.

I mean, there were many athletes who could jump as high as Michael Jordan and, you know, do some of the physical things, but he had a mental toughness.

The willingness and the determination to supersede everybody. Right.
The willingness to sacrifice. You only do that by sacrifice.
Only sacrifice can make you the best in the world. Nothing else.

You have to sacrifice. Well, certainly in your game.
Every game. Yes.
But you don't want to go, I mean, you don't want to go into the ring

flabby. You know, you have to be.
You have to have an ego. Like, I always, I didn't, I mean,

I used to just watch the old fight. They were always ripped.
I don't want them to look like the old-time fighters. Always rip.

You look like you're here to fight you know i never wanted to be the flabby right and you and you know muhammad ali

fought when he was flabby sometimes i remember howard cosota there's three rows of fat now where there were once two

oh he's just so beautifully degraded i know but he got punched too much yeah because he was in shape

you know what i'm saying yeah but because he was he out tough guys he was tough when you're tough in this sport it's not a tough man sport it's a thinking man sport.

At the end of his career, he got tough. He was taking punches.
I think it's both.

I think like the elite level of anything, you have to have like a,

it's like, you know, three lemons, three sevens in a row, like basketball. You have to be smart, high basketball IQ.
You have to have crazy skills, and you have to be tall.

If you're 5'9 and have the first two, fantastic. Good luck in your backyard.

But to be, and to i think at your in your game you have to be very tough you know smart and skilled you got to get all three

i'm a heavy i'm 5'10 i crushed the world to my feet

5'10 yeah yeah so that's perfect for a boxer you don't want to be tall right high grade like probably six well yeah for 11 5'11 6' perfect right and then your uppercut is perfect puts their

chin bone into their chest just that you're shorter and it's harder to hit a big target is easier to hit than so you know just just as a weekend warrior

i have a basketball thing here i play every day i that there's something about watching the ball go through your hoop it's like the likes you know it's like i get a like in my brain every time the ball goes in and like magic how do i how do how am i focusing this ball how am i navigating this ball in that little hole

How am I able to do something like that? That's almost impossible when you think about it. I always, you know, I had the same thought.

Like, if you had never seen anyone shoot a basketball and they were 20 feet away, you would think, oh, you'd get that one out of a thousand times. Somebody could do it all day.
All day.

Larry Bird could do it all day. Oh, lots of guys can do it all day.

I think the record for number of free throws in a row is something like 1,400.

Not in games, of course. This is like somebody, but they still did it.

Chainman did 100 in one game.

100 points. When you

land a good punch is that the same as when the ball goes through the hoop it's just like a oh i

must feel good the best punch in the world is um when you don't feel it

you don't feel it when you feel like you missed the guy and the guy's out dead that's the best thing

i don't know why

you think he missed dead you mean no yeah he's out tired he's no he's out cold cold yes

he's not getting up i'm I'm just saying, you're not wishing that he's. No, no, that's just boxing terminology.
You're not Johnny Depp and Amber Hurt.

That's painful to see, right? That trial? Yeah. Very.
No, serious. Very serious.

I was talking about it on my show last week, and I said it's literally the definition of a tragedy, because a tragedy is when the tragic character has this tragic flaw.

And because of the tragic flaw, it's inevitable that he's going to go to his channel. exactly but

you know people are beating up on the girl right but I understand her too

who knows what happens inside that relationship but what do you understand about Amber

I understand that

she's defending herself she's fighting for her life well and psychologically she thinks everybody's against her because she's not getting a good rep she's not looking good in the press

Well, I mean, and there's also, we have to acknowledge the possibility that she could be flat out lying. People do lie.
I mean,

but like you said, it's tragic, right? Tragic, yes. See love turn into that.

Well, it's tragic. Love because what love is, I guess, supposed to be.

Must have known. He had one trial already in London, which he lost.

He must have known that a second trial would completely ruin his career forever because there's just too much in people's heads about this now, and it went on too long, and he wasn't at an age where you want to start new, and yet he couldn't stop himself from pursuing this because he had to clear his name.

Check this out. He does not, I don't think he possibly

my life is with my what do you want? What? With my relations, what do you want? Take it all.

Oh, you mean if you were in a divorce? No, in all my relationships, take it all.

Take it all to who you want. Whatever, the finances, whatever you want, you take it all.
you're saying when you get into a discrepancy That's your

negotiating

right because you just don't want to fight

I don't like that tragic stuff when two people love each other and now it's they hate each other right if it is like that let's do that privately let's not you know oh that's just what I believe and that's what I'm saying what the tragedy is neither one of them is going to work because she will always be the girl who pooped in the bed I mean she could be the greatest actress in the world.

It doesn't matter. It's like you can't, when she comes on screen, you'll think poop in bed.
All you'll see is you Amber.

That's you,

you almost gotta cry for them, right?

Wow,

cry for them is a little uh no, no, no, from a human perspective. No, it is

look at them and you say, What the fuck? No, I'm do they have kids?

No, oh no, no, thank god. Oh, no, they got, I mean, look, he was married for like 15 years, or not married, you know, effectively married to someone who they lived in France, they had two kids.

They seemed very happy. And then he did a movie in 2009 with Amber.

And, you know, a movie set, it's like Temptation Island. Did you ever see the show Temptation Island?

I've been on a bunch of sets before. But Temptation Island? No, it's a set.
I just been on movie sets, and I see what happens on movie sets. Right.

But I'm saying, in Temptation Island, they have like couples who have been together for four or five years and then they put them with all these other singles on an island away from each other because they're tempted.

And a movie set is just like that.

Except not only is the wife a continent away and now you're on this island, a movie set with this hot person, but they actually are writing a script for you to fall in love with her.

You don't even have to do the work. It says right there, Tuesday, kiss her all day long, you know? But listen,

it all comes back from that Roman stuff. A group of persons is all sex.
You know what I mean? It's sex-inspired. That's who we are.

Everything does come from Rome. I mean, a lot from Western civilization.

Rome and Egypt.

Egypt. Less so.

Well, listen, count and find out how many pyramids are in this country.

Pyramids? Yeah. Well, there's the one in Vegas.
There's tons of them. Really? Pyramids? And the one in Vegas is still not bigger than the one in Giza.

I know, but the pyramid is not something that you'd have to be Egyptian to think of. I'm sure people all over the world thought, oh, look, pointy at the top and bigger at the bottom.

That's not like... There's pyramids in Mexico.
There's pyramids all over the world. That's what I'm saying.
There's pyramids in Bosnia. Yes.
Because everyone thinks of a pointy thing.

With, you know, bigger at the bottom. It's like a natural thing.
I think it's something that's a house of worship. Bullet bras.

What? I don't know. I think they always, it comes down to a house of worship.
What comes down to a house of worship? Pyramid.

Well, I mean, it certainly has been used in worship. You know, the people do think there's something mystical.
It's on the back of one of our

dollars, eh? Dollars, isn't it? Like, what's it doing on American money? You're right, it's everywhere. Because

we believe

our power system believes that's the way life should be. Roman and Egypt, we have an affixiation with that.

I mean,

there is another, I think there's another Egyptian, you're right, Egyptian thing on the money.

But a lot of this is because, you know, all these cultures, I mean, we did come, I mean, Roman culture then spawned European culture, which then spawned America. So we do trace more back to Rome.

But they were all, you know, mingling with each other. I mean, look at Mark Antony married Cleopatra, right? Yeah.
And Caesar fucked her too. Yeah.

They were like the Kennedys sharing Marilyn Monroe.

But it all comes down to the power of her.

They're all fucking Cleopatra.

That's the power, though. You know, everybody says she's getting fucked, but that's the power.
So you think she had the power? Absolutely. She had the strongest men in the world at her feet.

What do you think? You think Cleopatra was like great-looking or it was something? She was horrible looking. Cleopatra was horrible looking? A monster.
How do you know this?

How do you know what fucking Cleopatra looks like? Well, listen,

she had a tomb. People looked at her through the thing.
She was actually had a bent nose. She was really unattractive.

So what? She just gave the most amazing head? No, she was the most intelligent. Intelligent? Yeah.

And when she came to junior city, she was in a rug. And she, boom,

yeah.

She was smarter than that. She smuggled herself in the rug.
She was smarter than everyone else. So you think...

How did she get the two strongest men in the world at her feet? I bet you she was good looking. No, she was horrible looking.
Well, we don't know. To our standards.

Look at it in your phone. They were looking in my phone.

What

YouTube thing. What does that look like? Who took a selfie of Cleopatra

before BC? Listen.

One of the...

You can look for information.

I know, but you can't know. She's the ugly bitch.

We cannot know what Cleopatra was. No, no, no.
There was no photograph. She's an ugly bitch.

The ugly bitch.

I will not sit here and have you dedicate Cleopatra. The ugly strawberry.

Yeah, she was related to Alexander the Great, too. That's when the bloodline stopped.

What's this?

She had the bloodline of Alexander the Great, too. She had the bloodline.
How did she get Alexander's blood in her? Greeks. Greeks.
Greeks conquered this. One word?

though? Greeks. You mean you know that the Greeks,

she was Greek too. Who was? She was part of Greek too.

Cleopatra. Cleopatra, yeah.

Well, I mean, Greece and Rome, of course, grew up. Macedonia, they ruled everything.
Macedonia did not. Well, Alexander the Great, of course, was Macedonian.

And

Philip II. Philip II was

a barbarian. But Macedonia, even today, it's disputed as a a sort of a province of Greece or its own separate country.
It is its own separate country now, but people don't all agree.

The Greeks considered them barbarians. Yes.
Yes, they were warriors. I mean, they were sort of like Spartans of the North.
Look how many things are named after him. Alexander this, Alexander this.

Yes.

Yeah.

No, I mean he conquered the world, but he was dead by 33. 32, yeah.
32.

You know, I think his men wanted to go back and they poisoned him. He didn't want to go back.
He wanted to keep conquering and conquering. Because when he got to India and

all the armies got together, his men would say, no, let's not do it. Right.
And he wanted to cross the river. Yes.
He kept walking down the river, but they kept falling. He wanted to cross the river.

It's never enough. Yeah.
That's what you were saying about conquerors. Never enough.
Never enough.

So, listen, I got to to go, but... Don't go, man.
Come on, man. This is bullshit, man.
Hang out, man. I know.

I agree.

But I know it seems like we're just sitting here, but they were actually taping it. That's the problem.

Forgive me for my language. I just can't help

this shit. Forgive you.

I can't tell you how

appreciative I am that you would think enough of me to do this because you're the very hot property in media. and

you know I just really thank you so much Mike well I see you I think a good I think we're with Jeff husband having a good time and that's all respect we can do it again yes I do agree right yes I'm going to see Jeff

next month anyway okay

to move to Boca

you might yeah my kids they're playing tennis and golf so I'm gonna move to Boca

We had the house and everything for the house. Oh, you already did it.
Yeah.

Because Florida is attractive now. I mean,

I go back and forth on Florida Beach. Yes, I almost, I look, I literally took a virtual tour of homes in Miami.

Look,

sometimes you have to look reality stark in the face. And I was scared about, and still am, about the fires out here and other things, but mostly the fires.

And I thought, oh, well, maybe I should go someplace. And people said, well, you know, Miami, they'll have hurricanes.

I'd rather drown than burn. But not Miami.
You got to be in both

of them. And there is a sense of freedom there.
I mean, especially during COVID, you know, people, I liked it better in Florida, and I was not a COVID paradox. I was in St.

Boston, everybody was hugging and kissing each other.

Yeah, hell yeah. If I didn't have COVID, then I'm never going to catch it.

I was in St. Boston.
If I didn't catch it, I'm never going to catch COVID. If I didn't catch it, everybody hugging and kissing everybody.

Oh, I mean, the inconsistency of it was insane. But I thought about Miami, and then I realized, no, actually, at my age, by the time I felt like I was at home there, I would be dead.

I've been here 40 years.

You go to Miami, that would energize you. No, you go to Miami, you're like, whoa.
I mean, Florida, you'd be like, whoa, you're energy. I'm all to be energized.
I don't believe that's what you believe.

That's what you believe. I'm brittle.
No, I'm not.

I'm not brittle at all. I feel fucking great.

But I'm just saying, you can't deny that as you go down the path of life,

you do get a little diminished in certain ways.

If not, you'd still be the champion of the world.

I mean, so you can only be, as I always say, when people say, you look great for your age, is the part they don't say. You look great for your age.

We don't look like we did when we were 20. No, we're being serious now.
So life is just

liquor. do anything, but it's just a beautiful process of dying.
As soon as you're born in the world, that's very poetic. A beautiful process of dying.
Did you just make that up? Yeah.

That's really profound. But that's what it is, though, right?

It's a fucking great way to look at it. Can I get my pessimistic head wrapped into it? Maybe.

I mean, like this joint.

No, but you think about it. We can't.
I mean, this clove cigarette.

I don't

know what they're putting in these cloves lately Mike but it's fantastic

anyway all right

because Howie Mandel's here that'd be rude how he's I was just like we just watched him on television this day to remember how he never touched watch howie's thing and howie the still the same guy that he doesn't touch people watch howie and then we'll get together after we're all

I gotta get home

I gotta get home that's 20 year old guy stuff. Hey, man, let's just chill out.
Right. Quentin Tarantino, he stayed.
We partied all night at my house. God, it was beautiful.
Well, some night.

But you don't drink. No.
But you got the weed. That's enough.

You thought about weed.

Yeah, look at that fuck. Mike.
Jeevis.

That's you're not going to do that all in one night. Well, hopefully I don't, but I will attempt to do it.
Look at the ears. Look, come on, man.
You got to look at the Tyson mic bites.

You got to show that to the world. I can't keep them in the store.
Mike bites. I brought you a bunch of stuff, man.
I don't know why. I rub them into my belly and I stick them up my ass.

They're that good. Mike bites.
But you still, even if you stick them on your ass, you probably feel the high effects. Yeah, it probably would work.

No, you feel good. No, I'm telling you, I think the punch is the same.
You can't run around, but if the guy just stood still... Yeah, that'd be problems.

Would that be great? Wouldn't that be great?

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