Billy Corgan | Club Random with Bill Maher

This episode of Club Random is sponsored by ZipRecruiter.

The future of hiring looks a lot brighter because ZipRecruiter's latest tools actually speed up the process of finding the right people.

And now you can try ZipRecruiter for free.

Four out of five employers who post on ZipRecruiter get a quality candidate within the first day.

And if you go to ziprecruiter.com/slash random right now, you can try it for free.

Again, that's ziprecruiter.com/slash random.

ZipRecruiter, the smartest way to hire.

Club Random is sponsored by True Classic.

Men's fashion isn't complicated.

It's t-shirts.

And yet somehow companies make it either ridiculously overpriced or so cheap it dissolves in the dryer.

True Classic actually fixed this.

Premium shirts that fit, feel great, and don't cost more than dinner for two.

And clearly people notice.

You can find them at Amazon, Target, Costco, Sam's Club, or head to trueclassic.com slash random to try them out for yourself.

Rula makes mental health care actually accessible.

They take most major insurance and the average copay is just 15 bucks a session.

15?

That's less than parking in LA.

And therapy lasts longer than a meter.

With Rula, you answer a few questions, they match you with a licensed in-network provider, and you can meet as soon as the next day.

Go to rula.com slash random and take the first step towards better mental health today.

You deserve quality care from someone who cares.

So what's the worst part?

He goes,

I had to buy the whole village that went with the castle.

Because I looked.

Are you serious?

A rock star, Bill.

We look at these things.

Bill.

Here I am in your house again.

How are you?

How Bill?

You look in trim, Bill.

I actually never changed, but.

I know.

You look like you lost weight.

I did not.

Really?

I'm telling you.

It's just my memory.

If I kept losing all the weight people say I keep losing, I'd be like 100 pounds.

No, I'm always

within a pound or two.

Did you ever gain weight?

Were you ever plumpish?

I was plumpish, yes.

I would say like late 20s.

I have pictures of me like on my first sitcom.

And yes, my face was a lot fuller.

And it's like it was before I really even gave a thought to what constituted being healthy.

Because before that I was poor.

So when you're poor, you just eat whatever shit food.

And you're also, you're in your 20s.

You don't.

But yeah, I mean, I was

the older,

I mean, it's paradoxical, but I really feel like the older I get in some ways, of course, not every way you can't, but I'm healthier.

I mean, I get way less like colds and flu.

I used to get that every year because I drank more, ate shit food, didn't get proper rest.

You know, you take better care of yourself, and it's amazing.

Yeah.

Because we occasionally share the same makeup, people.

You and I?

Well, because.

Our production worlds cross occasionally.

You don't know this.

I'm just telling you now.

I don't know.

Really?

We do?

Occasionally.

It might be somebody who used to work with you or

maybe it's just because there's some cross-can you talk about your podcast?

Yeah.

Okay.

I mean, I think I had a hand in your you did.

Yes, and I'm very proud of it because you're very good at it.

Oh, thank you.

But my point is, I was going to talk about your skin because

this is a little weird, Mrs.

Robinson.

This conversation is getting a little weird.

Well, Bill, I mean, your skin looks so good.

So

I'm always back-channeling, trying to figure out what you do for your skin, Richard.

I won't reveal the secrets I've learned.

Well, you know, everything is made in the kitchen, I believe.

I heard that.

You know, that's the old saying, my abs are made in the kitchen, but it's not just abs.

You know, it's really what you put in your body.

I mean,

I was ranting about Kennedy last week.

He finally went too far with me.

And I was so wanting to be with him for his quest

to re-look at how we just, in the macro, look at health in America.

And I think he's right about so many things.

And certainly one of them would be, I mentioned this on the show, I never had a Western doctor, no matter what was wrong with me, ever said to me,

and what do you eat?

As if that shouldn't be like number one on the questionnaire about whatever's going wrong with you, that's going to have some input into it.

How can it not?

How could it not?

But it was just, that's just not on the chart of western medicine maybe more now so i was hopeful that he would like you know that kind of thinking and not the crazy part but the crazy part he you know he couldn't resist and so yeah um it's we're we're in crazy time part

well

look I might drink a little more than usual today because, I mean, I don't know when this is airing, but this is a shit day because a guy who sat there, Charlie Kirk, got shot today.

And I can't stop thinking about it.

Neither can I.

And we shouldn't.

And if you're on the other side of the political divide and you don't care because the wrong team guy got shot, fuck you.

You're what's wrong with this country.

I love when our country

can

yell, scream, point, cajole, mock.

Anything past that, I just can't.

I can't.

Right.

No, I

have,

well, I'm going to be all over this Friday night on my show, of course, but

just

the fight I have been having with the left.

While I'm, of course, the irony, as a lot of people in my position, still a liberal, just a traditional liberal not, won't go along with their...

like a lot of the stuff that's just crazy out there too far, which gets Trump elected, blah, blah, blah.

As I always say to my woke friends, we voted for the same person.

You're just why she lost.

Oh, I get it.

Okay.

Took me a second.

Sorry, I had to absorb that.

Okay.

You know, they're the people who don't want to talk.

It's my main issue with them.

And Charlie Kirk was a guy who, like, he was always talking.

And I talked to him here.

You know, the right-wingers, say what you want about them, but they talk to you.

They're not into this leftist think The left really has much more of a, I don't talk to you, I don't want to deal with you,

you're deplorable,

I can't break bread with you.

That attitude, and like all the right-wingers, they don't have that attitude.

Now, again, I didn't vote for them.

And Charlie Kirk and I certainly don't agree on much politically, but he sat here.

He's a human being.

He's not a monster.

And a husband and a father.

Yes.

And I liked him.

I liked them all.

They're all nice people when you meet them in person.

And they're not as crazy as they would.

Nobody's as crazy as they make them out to be.

And we're never going to get solve this unless it begins with both sides agreeing we both do it.

You know?

The right absolutely is full of...

Well, violence has to be off the table.

It's just

it can't be well in this

instance.

you just can't.

And maybe people aren't sophisticated enough because they don't really know the world.

And I'm not just talking historically.

I mean, the world, it's a complicated world.

And if you've traveled at all, you become grossly aware of how different the world is outside America.

And if you've been anywhere where sectarian violence has been part and parcel of the history,

you know, that stuff doesn't go away on one election cycle.

You're talking to people who, like, you know, it's going back hundreds of years.

You know, Sarajevo.

Sure.

I mean, a guy works for me who's literally in America because his family was, he had members of his family murdered during that whole,

you know, that I don't even know what you call it because we tried not to call it a war, but

he's the Balkan war.

Sure, but I'm saying, don't forget the propaganda of the time.

But I mean, in the 90s, I mean, it's

you mentioned sectarian.

Okay.

Sarajevo, when it was Yugoslavia, was a city of Muslims and Christians.

It was

in the Olympics, it hosted the Winter Olympics, and eight years later, people were getting shot when they went out to get milk because there were snipers.

It is not crazy

to think that something similar could happen here.

I mean, people have been talking for a while about a low-grade

civil war.

This is what it means to start one.

And like I said, both sides.

You mentioned political violence.

At the State of the Union, Biden's last one, he said

political violence has no place in our society, something like that.

And the Democrats all stood and clapped.

And the Republicans sat there like

And it's like, really?

You can't applaud for that, you fucking assholes?

And again, unless we start with both sides, the

Luigi Mangiones, which is like,

you know, I hope this isn't becoming like a copycat thing.

Like, oh, this is cool.

Sorry, Dan Richard.

But that's why I think we need to say culturally, societally,

left, right, American, don't care, ambivalent, political violence has to be off the table.

It cannot be an instrument to achieve goal.

It just can't.

It can't be rationalized.

It can't be asterisked.

It just can't.

It just can't.

Because what we have is so rare.

And both of us are the beneficiaries of a free market system.

And that free market system is not fair to everyone.

And free speech system.

Well, that's always been my biggest thing.

Anytime I've ever stepped in the political arena, and it's been very, very brief, I've always made the same point.

As an artist, if I don't stand for free speech, I mean, what do I stand for?

Because invariably somebody's going to stand up and say, you can't say that, you can't sing that, right?

And we do have limits, as we should, which is something that is directly threatening to, you know, specifically to a person or inciting violence very specifically.

And we do, that is already in our canon.

But.

It's like when you have kids and you say to your kids, like, they want to argue a point.

You go, yeah, but you know what you did was wrong.

Okay, so I think most people understand

where the line is.

They want to pretend that they forgot it.

Do kids know what they do is wrong?

I mean, I my children do.

Really?

How do they know?

Because they're kids.

Because they just know.

No.

Really?

No, no, I'm saying.

I'm just, I'm making a very simple point.

But I'm really asking, because I don't have kids.

And

I feel like kids

being kids who are, you know, you're not born knowing anything.

So you kind of have to learn it.

I feel like kids are feral.

And

well, Bill,

we don't have kids.

I'm saying is,

I don't think they're as feral as you think they are.

From when I'm when I've been, when I am out in public,

and you know, like

many times over the years, like going into a hotel, say.

Yeah.

And, you know, there will be kids coming through in the lobby or something, or when you're going up to your room in the hallway.

No, they're feral.

They are absolutely feral.

And they also are born without any sense of right and wrong.

Did you ever read Lord of the Flies?

Of course, yeah.

Okay, Lord of the Flies, great book.

And it's about kids who, what are they, on a desert island or something?

Sure.

And it just shows how feral they are and atavistic and how awful they are to each other because you have to be taught to be a good person.

I don't totally agree with you if you want to.

Well, tell me.

Okay.

My sense of it is,

and I go back back to my own relationship to myself as a child which was complicated but but what i try to talk to my kids about was when you did that did you feel good or did you feel bad and that's what i mean about a sort of innate sense of right or wrong like they they know deep down that even no matter how they justify their behavior and oftentimes they have a good you know he stole my toy you know that type of thing But deep down, they admit that they don't feel good about what they did.

And I think that, to me, is the delineating point that says on some level, humans are hardwired to have have some innate moral sense.

That's just my take.

Then why are so many of them incorrigible schmucks?

Why is there so much evil in the world?

Why is there so much crime?

Why is there so much merciless activity wrought by one human being onto another?

Man's inhumanity to man, we all know that phrase.

Where does that come from?

Yeah, I mean, I tend to default to there are systems in place that want to exploit human decency.

In essence, if you can separate a human from their own decency, well, there's a lot of money to be made.

Porn is a perfect example.

Porn.

Sure.

What's evil about that?

I'm not saying it's evil.

I'm not saying it's evil.

What I'm saying is

porn on some level requires a disassociative frame of mind to enjoy it.

I hope so, if you're doing it right.

Well, go into that further, if you would, from your disassociative frame of mind.

Okay, next time, not that you would ever watch porn.

I don't watch pornoborn.

Every day.

Okay, God bless.

I don't watch porn.

I don't believe in watching porn.

Really?

No,

I'm not judging.

And I'm not judging in reverse.

And if you did, I wouldn't care.

You can judge me all you want.

Next time you're masturbating in front of a pornobill,

I hope I don't enter your mind.

It's usually what I'm saying.

You will not.

You definitely will not.

Unless you show up in the video, which I'm not expecting.

Well, maybe somebody will look like me and it'll remind you of me.

You know, with AI, because absolutely, I mean.

Anyway, back to my point, Bill.

Billy with MILF and stepson.

You know, that's I guess I'd be a BILF, right?

Yeah, you would.

Yeah.

Point being is that

Next time you're watching porn as a thought experiment, if you'd like to try this, okay?

And

I'm going to assume for the sake of this thought experiment that you're...

When I have my dick in my hand, I'm all about the thought experiments.

Okay.

And I'm not saying you like young women, Bill, but let's say you're watching a...

Again, no shame there.

I'm not shamed at that either.

Okay, so you're watching a young woman in Flagrante.

I don't watch Italian porn.

No, I'm kidding.

Inflagrante, yes.

You're so erudite, Bill.

It's what what I love about you.

You are,

you're very erudite.

So you're watching a porn with a young woman, and it doesn't matter what's happening, it's just you're she's involved on some level on some level.

I fucking hope so.

If not, it's gay porn.

In Billy's thought experiment, okay, stop for a moment if you can.

If you're not so caught up in past.

I am so into this now.

I want to hear this so badly.

Stop and think that that's somebody's daughter.

That's so funny.

Do I know this person?

In other words, is it a person I know and is their daughter?

No, I'm saying that.

Okay, then I'm good.

And maybe even if I do, I don't know, but that's

sorry.

Sorry about the spit take, but

not my first one here.

Is that really what's going through your mind?

Yes.

But how does me,

a world away in front of a computer with my dick in my hand, how does this affect the daughter in any way?

And by the way, why is it such a horrible because my point was, it requires a level of disassociation.

In essence, you have to, on some level, disassociate that this is a human being who may or may not be in that position for all the wrong reasons.

Maybe it's all the right reasons.

I'm friends with a very famous porn star who did it.

purposely, intentionally, and is not damaged by it.

Right, I know.

And is

he totally fine with it.

Yes, porn stars are nymphomaniacs.

Generally speaking, you know.

Generally speaking, they really like sex and like to do it a lot.

I mean, it's not.

But by that classification, then you're a porn star.

I could have been.

I may have missed my calling.

I've thought of that many times.

You've got the frame for it.

Well, let's not

tip our mid too much.

I mean, I've heard from women it's usually the skinny guys that are that are packing the Sinatra heat.

Okay.

It's just unseemly to ever talk about your dick.

So I'm not going to start.

But is this the first time you've ever talked about your penis on your show?

No, but

one of my ex-girlfriends once talked about it on Howard Stern.

Really?

Yes, and I loved it because she blew his mind.

Okay, good.

I have to find that clip.

Yeah, you'll have to find that clip.

Anyway,

first of all,

I don't think porn necessarily is something that is

harmful to the people who are doing it, as they say.

I mean, involved in the actual what I'm amazed when I do go on Pornhub to find is that it seems like there is a literally inexhaustible number of women who are doing it.

It looks, if you just go on Pornhub and keep scrolling and scrolling, it looks like every woman in America under 35 years old is doing porn.

I mean, it is just a lot.

I don't know if this is accurate, but this is sort of anecdotal.

I heard somebody talking recently.

They were saying with the numbers on OnlyFans, that they estimate that 1.4% of the population of the United States is now doing porn.

Yes, that sounds about right.

Yeah.

I mean, and when you

look, if you parse that down to like what percentage of the population, okay, half of them are not women, so yes, there are some male porn stars.

And by the way,

kudos to them, because like a male porn star, what a brilliant idea.

A guy who says, you know what?

They're going to make porn and they're going to need a real dick.

They're going to need somebody's dick to get sucked all day long by hot chicks.

I could do that job.

I mean, I must say, there is a part of me that says, wow, I wish I had that kind of confidence.

But anyway.

Well, it's, you know, like it's a short step from there to comedy, you see.

Yeah.

The problem is, you know,

the people who watch it do get addicted.

There is a real issue here.

So we're going the right way as well.

There is definitely an issue.

I'm always been on the page, at least.

Look, I never even saw it on the computer until about, I would say, five or six years ago.

I was a guy who grew up with magazines.

And I was afraid to look at it because I was like, oh, what if they get a cookie in here?

And what if they know what I'm doing?

And what if they're really watching me?

And well, I got over that.

But

the

people not our age who grew up on it,

they do become addicted.

And it is not benign.

I don't think the kids watch it in the same way I do.

Like, I don't almost ever see the man in the porn video.

Usually it's a girl who comes out and does sexy stuff direct to camera for five or ten minutes, and then a guy comes in.

Well, I don't need the guy.

I'm the guy.

Like once the guy comes in, I don't actually like to watch them fucking and sucking.

I just like to see them being sexy.

Oh, I see.

You know, so like, that's very far from kids who, like, at 12 years old, they've seen a team of Japanese men have, you know, bukake with.

Yeah.

Have you heard the thing where, and again, it's anecdotal, but I've heard these things that

young men, they've consumed so much porn by the time they hit their late teens, early 20s, they literally can't have normal sex with the woman.

Right.

Because they're so...

And I have talked to young women who have complained that they get into relationships with guys.

And if the guy's, unless the guy's having sort of, let's call it, very edgy sex,

he can't.

And that's what is not benign about porn.

And it's, again, something that I don't even want to watch, is that it's kind of rapey.

It's,

you know, I don't need to, I don't, it's gross.

There's a lot of spitting and coming on the face and

you know, ass fucky things that are I'm not just like the sexy party.

I'm not interested.

Yes.

Okay.

I mean, you know, I mean,

here's the thing about sex.

It's very sexy.

And I just don't see the need to dress it up like with all.

And if you have to, I just think you're doing it wrong.

If you're using devices, if you're using food, like food should not be involved in sex at all.

I find it disgusting just to eat before you have sex.

I always think you should have the sex first and then dinner.

It's just wrong to do it the other way because you eat, you're bloated, you're farty, your breath stinks.

But, you know, but actually involving food, I just don't understand.

Or wigs, or fucking, I'm a pirate and you're a schoolgirl.

You know, I just don't, I mean, if you just fuck, you know, just learn how to fuck right.

And there's enough enjoyment in that there you go kids

advice from Bill

this episode of Club Random is sponsored by ZipRecruiter hiring is exhausting you post a job and suddenly you're drowning in resumes well the future of hiring looks a lot brighter because ZipRecruiter's latest tools actually speed up the process of finding the right people which means you save time and maybe even your sanity and now you can try zip recruiter for free at ziprecruder.com slash rendom look i've worked with a lot of people over the years some good and some actually downright quite terrible so be smart from the start and use zip recruiter to build your dream team with zip recruiter you can connect with qualified candidates in minutes see someone who looks perfect unlock their contact info instantly and with over 320 000 new resumes added every month you're not stuck fishing in the same sad pond.

So use ZipRecruiter and save time hiring.

Four out of five employers who post on ZipRecruiter get a quality candidate within the first day.

And if you go to ziprecruiter.com slash random right now, you can try it for free.

Again, that's ziprecruiter.com slash random.

ZipRecruiter, the smartest way to hire.

Club Random is sponsored by True Classic.

Men's fashion isn't complicated.

It's t-shirts.

And yet somehow companies make it either ridiculously overpriced or so cheap it dissolves in the dryer.

True Classic actually fixed this.

Premium shirts that fit, feel great, and don't cost more than dinner for two.

And clearly, people noticed they've sold over 25 million shirts to 5 million customers with 200,000 five-star reviews.

That's not a marketing spin.

That's men everywhere finally admitting, fine, I'll wear a shirt that fits.

It's no secret that I always look good, but now my staff does too, and part of the reason is True Classic.

The shirts are tailored where you want, relaxed where you need, no stiff fabric, no bunching, no nonsense.

Just a clean fit.

So skip the overpriced designer scam.

Skip the cheap throwaway junk.

True Classic is built for comfort, built to last, and built to give back.

You can find them at Amazon, Target, Costco, Sam's Club, or head to trueclassic.com slash random to try them out for yourself.

But you're not wrong that porn is not a

harmless endeavor.

That's kind of my point.

If you don't have a judgmental thing, which I don't have a judgmental thing, it's like

being transparent about that.

Right, but I don't think the women who are doing it are

being exploited terribly much.

They want to do it.

I'm sure sure they could and should pay the more.

Well, the dark side of porn is there's a lot of prostitution that goes on around the edges to make the money.

Well, as someone once pointed out, if you fuck somebody and they give you money, you're a prostitute and you get arrested.

But if they fuck somebody and they give you money, but there was a camera there, you're a porn star.

I see.

You know what I'm saying?

It's a little weird that just because there's a camera there,

that makes it legal.

Okay.

But I think both should be legal.

You don't think prostitution should be?

I don't really have an opinion.

I'm sort of gotten bored with the whole libertarian movement.

At some point, it seems to not live in reality.

But generally speaking, I believe in a free society.

Well,

excuse me, but

not thinking that a lot of people can't get sex and would benefit from paying to get it, that's not living in reality.

The reality reality is most people

are sexually stifled, frustrated, inept, and

there's something called a sex surrogate, which again,

actually,

I think I talked to one once.

I feel like I have a memory about talking to somebody.

Well, I mean, it's a

again, if you just rephrased it, it's a prostitute.

It's someone who's helping you come.

No, no, her whole take was like she goes in and helps the couple and okay, that's well that's not a sex surrogate that sounds like a therapist but but no but she would have sex with the people oh

no you know about this

with both of them yeah

she'd have sex with the wife and the husband yeah it was like the idea was like that's a full service

and I had this conversation so it was something like this and I'm just paraphrasing for the sake of conversation

husband and wife they've been together they don't want to get divorced They don't want to have affairs, but they're kind of stuck in their intimate life.

She comes in and teaches her how to get him off, and she teaches him.

But in order, the only way to do it is she's got to kind of be in the bed.

There's a great movie about that.

When I say great, I mean not great, but funny because it doesn't know it's not great, but it's still amusing.

It's with Meryl Streep

and Tommy Lee Jones.

Okay.

And Martin Short is in this movie?

No, no, no.

Steve Carell.

Okay.

I don't remember the name of it, but Meryl Streep and Tommy Lee Jones are a a married couple.

They've been married for a thousand years.

He comes home at night and he falls asleep in front of the golf channel, and she has just had it with this sexless, loveless peck on the cheek, go to work, fall asleep in front of the golf channel, marriage.

So she sends him to this academy or something run by Steve Carell, where he's got to relearn how to fuck Meryl Streep.

And it's just, I mean, it gets at this exact point.

And he, of course, is not into the the concept, but once she threatens to leave him, he does it.

And part of it was she was learning how to fuck him again because they had forgotten.

And she's the funniest scene, I bet you she did it herself.

Maybe it's in the script, but she's sitting there and she's reading the manual and it's telling her how to do it with a banana.

you know okay and so she's like starting to just suck the banana and then absentmindedly starts eating the banana

It's a classic.

What's the name of this movie?

I don't know.

I forget the name of it, but just Google Meryl Street relearns how to fuck Tommy Lee Jones, and you will, trust me, ChatGPT will have this interview just like that.

Are you into the chatter?

Are you friends with your chatter?

Is that something you think is bad for society?

Are we talking AI or are we talking...

I'm talking both, but I mean, I have my issues, especially with chatty.

I mean, my general thing is using Grok or ChatGPT or even Google, whatever their AI is, for sort of research, like a quicker version of Googling.

I'm cool with that because I just assume it's an amalgamation of a vibe.

Oh, there is.

I mean, there's great things about it.

But in terms of the furious row that's coming down the line for the arts and AI, well, then I have a ton of opinions on those, but

I don't want to bore you with those if it's not interesting to you.

It's very interesting to me.

I'm in the arts.

So pick a lane as much as I'm in the arts.

I know you are, but you can't be replaced, so you're good.

So far, that is true so far.

You're irreplaceable.

And you think you are?

I feel fine,

but I'm also very transparent.

It is scary that they have come up with like, I mean, I have an Elvis track that's not Elvis.

It's AI Elvis.

Yeah.

That is a little frightening.

Oh,

what I've been saying, because I get asked a lot about it in music interviews,

my general thing is it's over.

It's already over.

The world you thought of of music, just start with music, it's over.

It's already over.

You don't see it, but it's over.

Well, you're going to have to book some meat on that bone.

Okay.

You're 15 years old, okay?

When you were 15 years old, when I was 15 years old, it was the garage.

playing the Led Zeppelin into Infinity to learn how to play something, something, something, right?

Okay,

that's over.

If you're 15 years old now, okay, that time you're using so you can watch more porn, if you can press a button, if you can press a button and that thing can write a song for you or tell you,

even if it gets you 87% down the road and then you use your intuition and whatever talent you have to kind of finish it and say it's yours, it's over.

It's over.

And that's where we are.

Five years from now,

so we're in 2025 when we're doing this interview.

Five years from now, the music landscape will be completely devastated by AI on every level.

Every level.

Now, I'm not going to say it's a bad thing.

You will have a bifurcated society of people who do organic music, and they're literally going to say, I'm an organic musician.

This is what I do.

I'm not using all this technology.

And there will be this other world that won't give a shit.

I mean, organic, it sounds like the next generation from acoustic.

Sure.

Right.

It's like, I'm going to.

But people will be celebrated for being.

No, just,

it's funny because it really will be a recapitulation recapitulation of Dylan Went Electric.

And to the, I mean, that's one reason why I thought that movie was so great, because they picked just that one moment, which I'm sure that eluded some people who were not around for it, or maybe it got to the smart ones who could put themselves in that moment.

But I mean, even I was too young in 1965 to appreciate what was going on.

But the idea that the old guard, the folk, because he did start in the folk world, were just

it just seems so quaint now apoplectically appalled that bob dylan the the the

great hope of future

folk music the the the guy who was going to carry the banner of woody guthury and those types he went electric and of course the world was like great

because that's a great record like a rolling stone with the great organ and the electric guitar and you're right the audience and by the way the audience has no responsibility to give a shit they just want to be entertained that's why i say it's over right right and they're not going to give a right saying it's over and like i'm that guy i always say it i'm just a young man in the 22nd row you know i'm just because i have no musical ability which is so liberating so i can just like what i like and not like what i like and not worry and not about like does it matter is it important music that's that's kind of what i'm saying if you if yeah if there's an ai artist or there's an artist you know who's using ai to advance their

whatever their their musical cause you won't give a shit and and what you're thinking is that they all are by now they must be well from what

from what i've heard there's not a song coming out of nashville right now that doesn't have ai involvement particularly with lyrics i read in the paper yesterday

cartoon movies you know i guess they how about how about editing how about camera work?

How about

I mean, every level of entertainment is going to be affected.

You pay, do I assume you pay comedy writers?

Do you pay comedy writers?

Not personally, but my generous network does, yeah.

Okay, good.

So the point is, is whatever your budget is a year for comedy writers, let's say it's 100K,

if you can go, well, I don't have to pay those guys anymore, girls, there's 100K in Bill Maher's pocket.

And by the way, I like the jokes better.

I mean, trust me, I've looked into it.

No, I haven't, guys.

But they are definitely not there yet with comedy.

Okay.

How about AI porn?

Because comedy is just so, like,

part of it just can't be sussed out with logic.

It just strikes you as funnier as it does.

And sometimes the more off the wall it is,

and AI isn't there yet.

Yeah.

So

I just can't imagine them writing the kind of jokes I do.

Okay, but you, you know,

you produce a television show.

If you could save half a million a year using AI to do your editing or to your sound or

I mean, those are not my decisions.

I mean,

you know how the world works.

Absolutely.

Bottom line, they're going to do it.

But the other thing AI can't do is that I

they could

this is going to sound catty, but they could do other shows because they're so

predictable in their politics.

And that's one of my issues with AI.

It is programmed by the woke.

And I know this because

somebody once asked it, what was my best stand-up special?

And

first of all, it shouldn't even be giving opinions, but it gave the wrong one.

And I know why, because it was programmed by woke.

So it picked like one from 20 years ago that was woker because 20 years ago, the Democrats weren't funny.

The liberals hadn't gone off the deep end on a a lot of issues, and it was just bush.

And also

we were 10 years away from gay marriage and a lot of the special, or at least the end of it, was about how we should have gay marriage.

So the AI thing was like, oh, this is the best.

And it's not.

It's good.

But it's 20 years ago.

The one I did in December, way better.

But

AI can't do that.

Just the way.

Like, why do I use the old iPod, the old one, the wheel one, Bill?

The one where Billy Joel is featured prominently.

Yeah.

Among others.

Why?

Because I like to put my playlist together in a way that like no, none of those services can do.

Because they can only, if you say play songs like this,

they just take it from the same era.

I can play a song 40 years apart from another song.

I see.

and they have the exact same vibe, but they're from completely different eras.

And Pandora can't do that.

Right.

So they've got a ways to go.

Will they get there?

I don't know.

But look,

we had a good run.

Yeah.

You know, we had fun.

I mean, didn't you just play a stadium with 80,000 people?

65.

Okay, well, it's a lot of people.

It's a lot of people.

It's a lot of people.

Yeah, no, no.

I'm comfortable with all that, but because I have young children, nine, six, and a baby.

I mean, they're going to grow up in a world where AI is going to be pervasive on every level of creativity.

You just had a baby, huh?

Mm-hmm.

Wow.

Yeah.

And thank God it looks like me.

And how many baby mamas do you have?

Only one.

Oh, wow.

Only one.

You call yourself a rock star?

In fact, as we're taping this today, my wife just turned 33.

So I'm.

Oh, so you're Robin the Cradle, too.

Look at you there like that.

And Bill, you like young women.

How old are you?

58.

How dare you?

How dare you be.

So how old was she when you got married?

We got married two years ago.

Oh, Oh, two years ago.

Yeah, we had kids before we got married.

I refused to get married.

So, I finally capitulated.

So, you were with her when she was in her young 20s?

We met when she was 19, and I was.

19

beats me.

I at least wait till there's a two in front of their name.

Bill, you're a great,

you're a great orator, you're a great comedian, you're a great thought leader.

Oh, okay.

But I'm a rock star, Bill.

Ah,

that's so true.

That is so true.

I cannot fight that.

You are so right about that.

You are a rock star, and you deserve those extra two years.

That's awesome.

God bless her because I don't know what the hell she saw in me.

I mean,

there's obvious things, but that's,

you know what?

Stop with the false modding.

I hate when guys do that.

I'm so lucky.

Shut the fuck up.

You know what?

You're a rock star.

You're really funny.

You seem like a great guy.

I mean,

you got money.

I mean,

I'm not feeling bad for her that just to put up with Billy Corgan of the Smashing Plumbing.

She's done all right.

She's done all right.

She's done all right.

Yeah.

But she,

and a baby, that's got to be.

Is that...

It's a feral baby builder.

Feral.

Feral.

Sorry, feral.

Feral.

Well, there was that singer, Feral Sharkey, right?

So I'm confusing Feral Sharkey and Feral Baby.

Do you remember the song, I Might Like You Better If We Slept Together?

I covered it at Dodger Stadium, opening for Tis

Halloween Night 1992.

Is that why I remember that?

Maybe.

It may be, because the record itself.

Great record.

Susie and the Banshees?

No, it was Romeo Void.

They had two hits.

I Might Like You Better If We Slept Together and A Girl in Trouble.

Bill, I know my rock.

I'm not going.

Great band.

Great band.

I think from Southern California, actually.

Wow.

I Might Like You Better If We Slept Together.

What a great song.

What a great title.

Yeah.

You know, like title's a big thing with a record, right?

You got to.

Some people are big on titles.

Like I say, title is not a big thing.

Some people can, they say they can't write like

an Irving Berlin type writer.

They would want the title first.

Like, if you knew Susie like I knew Susie, you know what I mean?

Right?

Quite an example.

Well, we're going back to Eddie Cantor there.

I was going to say.

No, but I'm saying that's how those guys wrote.

It was like

the title had to sell the song, and then they would write the song.

I'm not a title guy.

I mean,

I think bands throughout the ages have liked titles.

I mean, I wrote Bullet with Butterfly Wings.

That's a great title.

I think I stole it from Freud, actually.

I remember in the Eagles documentary, Glenn Freud was like, I was riding with some guy in a car.

We were on Coke, and he said, Life in the Fast Lane.

And he was like, okay.

That's a good title.

You want to listen to the song?

But it was almost like, I have nothing but that, but I'm already like three-quarters of the way through with this song.

How about Desperado?

How about Hotel California?

I mean, what great titles?

Yeah.

Are you an Eagles fan?

Very much so.

But

I don't feel like they

get you as much as Life in the Fast Lane.

I mean, what's Hotel California?

It could be about anything.

We love it because we know the song.

Desperado, yeah, that's pretty cool.

I think Hotel California is one of the great lyrics of all time.

Oh, the lyrics, yeah.

I mean, that was the lyrics are.

Oh, yes.

And Don has been asked about it a thousand times, and he always says, you know, first of all, he's tired of being asked about it.

And he says,

it's just about a journey from

innocence to experience.

Okay.

Why does that piss you off?

No, because

I'm empathetic because I know what it's like to be asked about something over and over again, but I don't buy the answer is kind of what I'm saying.

What do you think it's about?

I think it's about LA.

I mean,

I think it's the greatest,

I call it dark LA.

Yes.

Right?

Dark.

It is the greatest dark LA song of all time.

You're right.

Like, I might like Better If We Slept Together, you could say that's a dark LA song.

No, L.A.

is dark.

California is dark.

Some great writer, I forget, it may have been Dashel Hammett, said, you know, L.A., it's a sunny place for shady people.

Well, Chandler, I mean, he.

Raymond Chandler.

He encapsulated the darkness of this place.

Or even,

what's that book?

Day of the Locusts.

Yes.

Have you ever read that book?

Yes.

I mean, you want to talk about Dark LA.

And that book was written in like 1939.

Well, I think if you asked the average person, like, where do you think, you know, the

noir movies take place or like that milieu, they would think, oh, that's a New York thing.

No, no, no.

No, no.

It's San Francisco.

Right down the street.

It's San Francisco, Sam Spade.

It's L.A.

It's always out here.

Yeah.

Chinatown, all of them.

We're a shady, messy people out here.

Yeah.

You know,

but we're seduced by, of course.

Can I tell you about my first LA trip as an adult?

Do you mind if I tell you?

So I came out here as a kid.

We went to Disneyland and all that stuff.

But when I came the first time as an adult, I was about 21 or so.

And I came out with a friend, and we ended up staying with the friend's sister.

And, you know, we're off Hollywood Boulevard, and it's all, you know, it's right out of the movies.

I'm walking and looking at the stars on the thing.

And, you know, I have that impression a lot of people have, which is that kind of, is that all there is?

It's more built up here as a tourist industry, but back in the 80s, it was kind of, there wasn't much to see.

You know what I mean?

You had the stars on the Hollywood Boulevard, to quote Ray Davies.

I have one.

You do?

Of course.

Thanks.

Are you proud of it?

Of course not.

It's ridiculous.

You can buy one.

That's true.

I mean, I think you could.

I mean, not anybody, but yeah, it's not.

And if you just walk on the boulevard, and yes, that is a great song.

Yeah, stop me on Bello Society.

Stop me on.

Yeah.

Yo, I know that song very well.

Yeah, very great song.

You know, like, yes, you see a lot of the biggest stars in the world, and then you come across names you just don't even know.

Yeah, that's true.

You know, I mean, I happen to be near Clark Gable, so I'm near.

That's not bad.

No, that's not bad, but everybody's near somebody, and then, and then there's like, you know, Biff Cumstein.

You're like, who the fuck was this?

Biff Cumstein.

Well, whatever.

I don't know.

He was a cameraman for

Cecil B.

David.

You know, he crossed in a brown sport coat in some movie in the 30s.

I don't know.

He just, you know, it is what it is.

But yes, I was happy to go.

It was 2010.

I remember the ceremony and Larry King and Seth showed up and lots of my friends and, you know, they give a speech.

And it's cool.

It's cool.

It's, you know, look, I love Hollywood.

I love all the bullshit.

I love not, I always say, I'm in show business, but I'm not of it because I'm not really like them and I'm not really in any category.

But like when I go to the Vanity Fair Oscar party, it's to me that's like going to Disneyland.

To stand in the middle of a room and everywhere you look is a star because the stars in this town, they do not come out at night.

I don't know what people

most of I mean to be fair a lot of them do work that's why exactly it's a working town and movies always has been has been and movies start at 6 a.m.

yeah

that's a cruel business for that

here's the problem with mental health most people agree you should get therapy right up until you try then it's a nightmare finding someone scheduling paying for it by the time you get an appointment you don't need a therapist you need a drink.

That's why I want to tell you about Rula.

Rula makes mental health care actually accessible.

They take most major insurance and the average copay is just 15 bucks a session.

15?

That's less than parking in LA.

And therapy lasts longer than a meter.

With Rula, you answer a few questions, they match you with a licensed in-network provider, and you can meet as soon as the next day.

And every provider is vetted, real professionals, not some rando with a laptop.

Thousands have already trusted Rula to support them on their journey toward improved mental health and overall well-being.

Head on over to rula.com slash random to get started today.

After you sign up, they ask you where you heard about them.

Please support our show and tell them our show sent you.

Go to rula.com slash random and take the first step towards better mental health today.

You deserve quality care from someone who cares.

Club Random is brought to you by Radioactive Media, named the 20th fastest growing private company in the Pacific region by Inc.

magazine, which means they must be doing something right.

Now, sure, earthquakes, floods, hurricanes, we try to prepare for those, but economic uncertainty, that's a little harder to plan for.

So if you're a business owner, you can either panic or you can try something that actually works.

That would be audio marketing.

Podcasts and radio now reach more people than social and digital combined.

Yeah, and unlike social media, you're not competing with cat videos and your aunt's political rants.

Radioactive media knows how to build campaigns that cut through the chaos and they believe in audio so much.

They're advertising themselves with it right now.

Which honestly is more convincing than any PowerPoint you'll ever sit through.

Go to radioactivemedia.com or text random to 511-511.

Text random to 511-511 today.

Message and data rates may apply.

If you're a smoker or vapor, ready to make a change, you really only need one good reason.

But with Zinn nicotine pouches, you'll discover many good reasons.

Zinn is America's number one nicotine pouch brand.

Plus, Zin offers a robust rewards program.

There are lots of options when it comes to nicotine satisfaction, but there's only one Zen.

Check out Zinn.com slash find to find Zin at a store near you.

Warning, this product contains nicotine.

Nicotine is an addictive chemical.

You know why so many like male actors of a certain era look terrible now?

And I look pretty good?

Because I don't spend all day in the sun.

Yeah.

And they have to.

You're on the set all fucking day.

There's only so much sunscreen in the world and you're just out there and you're just baked.

This is a working town.

The people just,

it's not a party town, but like on those few nights when the stars do come out, it is fun to look around the room or and be able to talk to all of them.

And of course it's show business.

Most of them are pretty stupid, but they're talented.

The people are so talented.

And just notable exceptions, but you know, thinking just ain't their thing.

I always find people that are in the zeitgeist fascinating.

Like, who is it?

It doesn't matter.

I mean, pick your Hollywood party.

Taylor Swift.

Sure.

Zeitgeist.

That is.

I mean, I have my opinions on that whole thing at this point, and I probably should keep it to myself so I don't get attacked by the Swifties.

No, I say it all the time.

I find her, as a person, so admirable.

She never does anything I find to be like in any way objectionable.

She's classy, you know.

You never get her with a bad picture.

She seems very responsible, very smart, a good sense of human being.

As a business person, first of all, she's very talented.

So I'm going to say that real quick.

From a musician to a musician, she's very talented.

Okay.

I don't get the music.

But that's just about, but that's just.

But just take it from me.

She's very, very talented.

I'm sure she is.

But what I was going to say is, as a business person, she's brilliant.

Brilliant.

Yes.

I mean, it's a total coup, which she's built.

Absolutely.

So you can only marvel at it.

In fact, quick statistic that I heard behind the scenes, the demand for her concert tour, the stadium tour, was 900 stadiums.

They could have sold 900 stadiums full of tickets.

Now, that is an accomplishment.

No, I always say that, too.

Like, even if you don't personally appreciate something on the artistic level, it doesn't tickle you, you've got to give it up for success.

You just have to, or else you're not.

Well, that's what I mean.

I like the glow of the zeitgeist because I feel like like it says something about the American public.

Like, look, for example, why her this generation?

Why Barbara Streisand, another generation?

Why

Heddie Lamar?

Whatever, you know what I'm saying?

Hedley Lamar.

Hedley Lamar.

Yeah, blazing south.

No, but I'm saying is, what is it about an age that picks certain people?

You're so, that's such an interesting point.

And you're right about her.

And look,

she's a little whiny about her exes, but in general, could

today's today's young women have a worse role model?

Absolutely.

As role models go, I'm very happy with them having their Taylor Swift.

Now, do I think it's pathetic that they lived their lives so much through her that they were like in tears when she got engaged?

Yes, I do, because I don't think it's healthy to live your life so much through another human being.

Are there Bill Maher groupies?

You know what I mean?

No, I mean, I'm serious.

Do you have your like kind of groupie contingent?

I I don't investigate this, but somebody showed me on one of the dating sites, there is a category like you can like on your interest, Bill Maher.

And there are, yeah, there was a lot of people.

Like Daddy Bill or?

No, no, just Bill Maher.

And I thought that was flattering, but I'm not.

Because I'm getting some of that now, now that I'm in my 50s.

Yeah.

You know, my social media person will show me, and it's like, they start calling me like Daddy Billy.

Oh, I wish that Billy was my daddy, but not like that daddy.

That's more like a Zaddy.

Well, I don't know what Zaddy is.

Zaddy's a guy who's like a daddy figure, but also sexy.

You know, like a Zaddie.

I was named People Magazine's sexiest man at 50.

Like, they picked everyone from a certain age.

So I got 56.

A friend of mine who's around your age or my age, somewhere in between, like he said to me recently, I wouldn't say what field he's in, but show business.

And he said, you know, this girl came up to me and said, you're so iconic.

And he said, can you believe it?

I'm getting an iconic pussy now.

And yes, that's what you would get.

Yeah.

I'm married.

But you're happily married.

I'm very happily married.

I'm happy to say I'm happily married.

Yeah.

Well, I know you had a rough childhood, so that must be great for you that

you can find that kind of stability that was lacking in your earlier years.

I will candidly say that

I had a very incredible artistic life and I thought I'd kind of seen it all twice and you know dark LA and all of it.

No, I did.

I mean I lived it all the good and the bad and the crazy and

and

and until I was happily married and I had my own family I didn't really appreciate what I'd done and built.

And now that I have that balance, now I have so much more

zest and zeal for my musical life.

It was the thing that I, and maybe because I didn't have it as a kid with my family, because I never really knew what it was like to have a family.

I mean, I had a family, of course, but I'm saying I didn't have the stability that this marriage has brought me.

So having that now, it's like I finally feel like, okay, this all makes sense.

You know, if you do something like you chase a career, you know, which is a dirty word in my business, career, you're not supposed to say the word career.

But if you do all that and you do accomplish something and people say, oh, you're this and, you know, I love this album.

But you always kind of feel this kind of hollowness about it, but you don't really know what it is.

And I realized it was because I didn't have the one thing I really wanted, which was a family.

I still don't really see how they interact with each other.

Like, I get

the tension because I certainly have felt it in my own life between career and love.

Sure.

To me, those are the two things that were always vying.

And I might say, if I go back and analyze my own life, the fact that I was dumped so hard in high school and it

broke me so badly.

What's her name?

We're not going to go into that.

Pick up a name for that.

No, no.

Sally.

Yeah, Sally.

Sally Tenfingers.

She had 10 fingers.

Yeah, I know.

That's not really that weird.

Anyway, Sally.

And I feel like from that moment on, I was like Scarlett O'Hara when she says, you know,

as God is my witness, I'll never go hungry again.

I see.

I was like, as God is my witness, I will never get my heart broken again like this, and I will put my eggs in the basket of what I can control, which is my career.

That is what will make me happy.

Because I can't count on this other thing.

Looking back now, not saying the dream is over, but do you feel that was the right decision?

Great question that

I probably

should think about more.

And there's a lot to be said.

It's not a, you know, 90-10.

It's a 50-50 kind of a thing.

Because sorry, because you were poking around about me, like you were saying, trying to understand.

No, but I'm saying is I'm trying to sort of answer your question while I'm asking you one.

No, it's a great question.

I mean, look, I'm not going to get too specific.

It all just came out in the wash.

I'll just put it that way.

I think I was never meant to, like,

through

the very formative years of my life, and that probably goes on longer than it should have,

was never going to be

tied down anyway.

It just wasn't my nature.

And part of that, you know, is, again,

rock star, you know, you're probably so inundated that, you know, you get it all out of your system quicker.

That's true.

That's true.

Now, I remember a point, I was actually out here.

I was working for an extended period of time.

And it was the first time in my life where I was just going to like, it was like, okay, I'm going to live like free.

Right.

you know and I would meet people and I would say look

don't ask I don't want to be tied down right like I'm be totally transparent about this I'd never really been that way in my life and it was I was surprised how many women were like okay cool most of them of course thought they were gonna try to reel me in on the back end I'm sure you've had a few of those and and it got to the point where

the balloon went off the rose of what free what I thought freedom was.

Freedom to me was do what you want when you want to do it.

And as long as you're having a good time and everybody's,

you know, it's all adults and everybody's cool.

And I lived like that for a while.

And

I woke up one day and I was like, this is boring.

And I never, and to be fair to anybody, and I'm not bragging, there's no brag in this.

I got to the point where I was like, this isn't really what I'm after.

Right.

I get it.

Yeah.

I disagree on the boring.

It never gets boring.

What you hit on there, which I think.

Bill, let me tell you a story.

Let me tell you a story.

Okay, because I'm going to agree with you on this one point.

Okay.

Okay.

I was with this girl.

And a circus animal.

No, no, just a girl.

Okay.

Just a girl.

And

we're in Flangrante

in bed.

And she says to me,

can you lick my back?

Sure, as one

And I said, and she was pretty hot, so I was like, okay, if that's what you want, I've done it without asking.

Okay, good.

And

it was like one of those, like, you know, when somebody asks you to scratch a back, it's like, no, a little more up to the right and to the left.

And

in this one spot in her back, she could orgasm from having her back licked in this one spot.

Do you have her number?

Actually, I do.

And

the way she explained it to me, and God bless if she ever hears this, she's a very nice person.

The way she explained it to me is that

sometimes,

and I'm not a doctor,

but apparently, like, certain nerves get rerouted.

I'm sure.

So, how some people can orgasm by, say, having their nipple licked.

Sometimes that nerve reroutes to a different spot in the body.

So, in her case, the nerve was in her back.

So, as long as you lick this one spot on her back.

That's almost the plan.

So, that never got boring, Bill, let me tell you.

That's almost the plot of Deep Throat.

Is it?

Oh, that's right.

Linda Lovelace.

Do you remember Deep Throat?

Oh, yeah, it's the first pornography I ever saw, Bill.

And the one that was the first sort of crossover.

It was a national sensation.

And what was the plot of Deep Throat?

She could orgasm by.

Clit was in her throat.

Right.

Well, maybe it was just the nerve rerouting.

That's what I'm saying.

It's almost the plot.

Yeah.

So I lived that.

I mean, I think.

So what I'm saying is that part didn't get boring.

A back

on a woman can be like the sexiest part.

I don't despite all your bluster bill you're really a romantic.

I do not find a beautiful back I do not find any less sexy than the front and sometimes more.

And so like I know you're not allowed to show the front but you are allowed to show the back, which I always thought was like great.

That's fine.

Just show the back.

I'm good.

Is Is this

too intimate for you?

You brought up licking back.

I mean, I'm not going to lie.

That sounds good.

I was free processing it all, Bill.

No, I see that.

But what was the important point that we were getting to that I really wanted to do?

You were trying to understand the connection between...

me not finding peace by having a successful musical life and then and then how love

or marriage successful marriage how they sort of fit together that's why it's so important that one of us isn't smoking.

Yeah.

Am I paraphrasing that?

Yeah, perfectly.

And that is really what's in my mind because I'm trying to get that connection because

you're basically saying,

unless I'm getting it wrong, that you weren't able to appreciate your massive career success before you had the love.

And I get that the love is...

you could then find the love and be like, oh, and this is even better.

No, I can't.

But I don't know why you couldn't access the satisfaction from the career before you.

I can tell you why.

I can tell you why.

I had a million dollars by the time I was 24 years old.

A year before that, I was making $12,000 a year working at a record store, and I was broke.

So I'm a million, you know, I mean, we grew up in a time where millionaire.

These days, millionaire doesn't mean as much, but the word millionaire still meant something in my brain when I was 24 years old.

So I have a million dollars when I'm 24 years old.

By the time I'm 26, I'm IMTV, Platinum Records, Saturday Night Live, cover rolling stuff.

I mean, I basically did, by my mid-20s, like most of the checklists.

All the boxes.

Okay.

And I never felt this sense of satisfaction about it.

And I couldn't quite understand why, because everybody around me is like, this is fucking incredible.

And I was like, it is and it isn't.

Okay, so to answer your question,

the problem with all of it is it's transactional.

Because no matter how many hit songs you write, it's always,

what about the next one?

No matter how many records you're sold, there's always somebody who's going to sell more records than you.

No matter how good you are, there's always somebody telling you writing online that you're the worst thing that ever happened.

There was always like an asterisk or a qualifier.

I mean,

even my band at times was transactional with me.

I mean, I would write these massive songs and they were kind of like, they didn't give a shit.

It was weird.

Why?

Well, that gets into band psychology, and we could talk about it if you want, but just to finish the little spiel:

only unconditional love in some facet of your life gives you the proper perspective to appreciate what is great about transactional things, but allows you to see them for what they are, which is transactional.

There's no Valhalla at the top of Rock Mountain, there isn't.

And I've been there multiple times.

So when I stand in front of 65,000 people,

in my hierarchical mind, my family is still above that.

I tell my kids all the time, and they're still little kids, and hopefully it'll endure in their brain.

I tell them, because they'll come see me play.

They'll come on stage with me.

I mean, we pulled up to where the Mets play in New York, and my daughter goes, how many people am I going to dance in front of today?

And I said, well, 41,000.

She goes, okay.

And then an hour later, she's on stage with me dancing in front of 40,000 people.

They're having these immense peak experiences.

But I tell them over and over again, no matter what you see daddy do, no matter what you hear about daddy, good or bad, you're more important than that.

You are so much more important than that to me.

I would trade all of this for you.

Only unconditional love sort of clarifies what's great and not great about it.

And

if all you have, and because I came from nothing,

it was about am I on MTV?

And if I'm not, I was devastated because I must be doing something wrong.

Well, I get all that because it's ephemeral.

Stardom,

like beauty, like a lot of the things.

Sorry, you started talking, we started talking, you know, within the context of the political thing.

I mean, you were somebody who stood up for decades and talked about free speech and free thinking

and a political part of this country because you're not willing to march in lockstep, suddenly all the things that you've contributed, suddenly it's out the door.

But

you've been doing, how many years have you been standing up there in the political mall?

Yeah, 32.

Okay.

On TV.

So the world we grew up in, that should mean something.

Like, well, I'm mad at Bill Maher today, but it has some perspective.

Now we live in your, you're either swinging from a rope or you're Chairman Mao.

But, you know, yes, but there are still lots of people who appreciate it.

Well, I'm with them.

Yeah, I appreciate it.

And that's who I do it for.

And you're right.

There are others who went for the exits when you don't fully just go for the team.

And that is, first of all,

it's not helpful.

It's not going to elect the right people.

And it's, worst of all, boring.

It is boring.

It's boring to be predictable.

It's what my friend calls let-me-guess politics.

Something happens, and let me guess.

You know, it's like when there's a shooting.

Like, right before they even check anything, they know who did it.

They know whose side the person was on.

Okay, let me guess, or Trump does something, let me guess.

You know, it's just, it's boring, and it's not sophisticated.

It's just not sophisticated.

So that's why I took myself out of the political discourse, because I couldn't,

you know, I've had a very unique life, and it's not,

not everybody agrees, but the point is, I've had a unique perspective.

I've been in the White House.

I've met smart people like you.

I've been behind the wizard's curtain 500 times.

I have a very unique perspective on the way the world works.

It's not for everybody, but you can't say I don't have a unique perspective.

Not many people have climbed up that particular mountain for that length of time.

And when you can't have a nuanced, intelligent discussion that's not even trying to make a point to somebody, just like, let's just talk.

And hey, by the way, based on my experiences, this is the way I read the football.

Yeah, and

that's why I love to have people like Charlie Kirk sit there there as he did, because I'm not going to agree with most of what he says.

First of all, he was very Christy and all that.

I'm an atheist, but it's okay.

He's a human being and not a dummy.

And unless people get it through their thick fucking skulls, you're going to have to talk to people.

Let me tell you something, Bill.

We've had over 200 guests here sitting in that chair.

I would guess at least a quarter of them

say something that is is full-on bonkers in my view okay you know like we didn't land on the moon

shit like that or maybe I linked her back and or

that is the least crazy thing you're not in that category okay so far I mean I don't know why we got

a few minutes yeah we got a few minutes but

if you start just

just dismissing people

for anything other than just the most kind of egregious, you know, I'm a Nazi and I'm proud of it,

although even Kanye has survived and I'm not for canceling him either.

He sat here once.

We didn't air it because I would have been canceled.

Or, you know, I'm a cannibal, not like an Army Camel who was not a cannibal, and he sat here, and I was happy to rehabilitate him, but an actual cannibal, you know, unless it's something like so out there, you know, you just got to get over yourself and talk to these people.

And for all those assholes who are like, you know, I can't believe you talked to Trump.

Okay, I'm not even going to go into why that's such a stupid opinion, but just where does it end?

Or I can't talk to him.

Who's next?

People who voted for him?

Can I not talk to Joe Rogan?

Right.

Can't even talk to him.

What about Sylvester Stallone?

He's such a great guy.

Stallone, Rocky.

Really?

I can't talk to him.

Fuck off with this bullshit.

You know, so

I don't know.

We got back onto that.

I really didn't want to.

I really didn't want to.

No, I wasn't trying to lead you.

No, no.

It's on my mind.

It's on our minds.

It's terrible.

Let me tell you something.

I got off the road.

I'm so glad I did last year.

I mean, at the end of last year, I wouldn't want to be out there right now.

It's getting a little chippy.

It's getting a little chippy out there.

Yeah.

And

let's hope from

this moment that there's no more of that.

If I were you,

I would stay out of it.

Oh, I know I do.

You're in front of 65,000 people?

That's not a security.

I leave it to the way I look at it, and I don't ⁇ because at one point I wondered if I was compromised, meaning like, should I be saying certain things when I feel, you know, like a day like today, it's like, should I say something or not?

Just let me finish.

No,

because I want to make sure I'm clear because I don't want people to misconstrue what I'm saying.

My best contribution is art.

Yes.

You're a person who lives in the political firestorm weekly.

Yeah, it's my job.

You chose that.

Yes.

And

you're great at it and

you talk to people behind the scenes.

You have very illuminated people on from every walk of the political stripe.

Okay.

So I'm more of a leave it to the people who are in the fight.

And I use that word loosely because obviously...

I want you to, because first of all, you know, you're an eloquent, elliptical lyricist.

Let that speak for itself.

You don't need to give them a reason

when you're in front of a crowd.

Well, I also came to the conclusion that I'm never going to exactly say what I want to say, not in a song.

Like, my gift is to say it in a song.

That's what I'm saying.

Yes.

So if I really want to contribute, then write Imagine or

Bullet with Butterfly Wings.

You know what?

That's my contribution.

That's what the God that I believe in animated me to do.

The other stuff is really for people who want to be in it on a daily level.

And I can respect and appreciate it, even if I don't always agree.

Right.

So

you were talking about unconditional love.

Sure.

And that's, I mean, kids, I can kind of get that, because, I mean, what's the worst thing a kid can do?

I mean, they're feral, but, you know, they're not really capable of murder or anything.

But you think you can have that with a human?

Yes.

Because unconditional, so like if you killed somebody, she'd still, she'd stay with you?

Is that what?

Because I feel like

with adult humans, it's a kind of a tough argument to make unconditional because you can think of things someone would do where you kind of would want the other person to.

Okay, can I answer that?

No, no, but let's see.

No, that's why I brought it up.

No, no, but I want to, because

I feel like I got what you're asking.

I I think to ask another human being to live up to

a standard of perfection,

when we say unconditionally and you bring up like a thing, like, okay, well, if you murdered somebody, is she going to stand next to you?

You know, that type of thing.

I think the one thing I would say is you're right to point that out.

And if you're going to ask me, is there anybody on this planet that I trust 100% that aren't my children?

The answer is no.

Now, I trust my wife more than most.

Right.

Like, I don't know what the percentage is, but it's very, very high.

And I've made that commitment.

But the thing I would try to explain to you is: once you have children, it's the highest bond you can have with another human being.

So that's the closest I've ever come.

And if you want to sort of give a kind of standard to it, I didn't have it with my father.

I didn't have it with my mother.

I didn't have it with my stepmother.

I didn't have it with my immediate family.

I have a very good relationship with my brother, and I trust my brother a lot.

So outside of my brother, and his kids, and his wife, and my wife, and our kids,

it is all transactional on some level.

And I've had the experience, however horrible it is, where I was a kid, ignored by members of my family.

I got successful.

Suddenly everybody was really interested in what I had to say.

And then when my career went down, they all disappeared again.

That's a tough one if you've lived it.

So this is the closest I've ever come.

And I'm not a person who's waiting around for perfection.

I think at 58, I think I've got enough road beneath me to say, okay, if this is as good as it's going to get and it's really good, okay, I'm going to trust that.

And if that, there's still that 4%, 7%, well, that's all I can tell you is

when we got down, because I didn't want to get married, and I was very transparent with my wife.

I said, do not want to get married, because I'd been married before and went through a bad divorce and all that.

And I was just like, I don't want it.

I don't want the state of Illinois and my fucking bullshit.

Okay.

Especially when you're talking about songwriting, copyrights, and all that shit.

And

my wife said, you know, we talked a lot about it, and she was very intent on getting married.

And it's not important why for this.

But the one thing that became clear was that she said, look,

I know you're not big on trust.

I understand why.

But I'm telling you, when we get married, our relationship will get better.

And I couldn't, for the life of me, imagine how.

And I'd been with her for eight, nine years at that point, and we had kids.

I couldn't conceive of it intellectually.

And I'm telling you, the day after I got married, I looked at her and said, motherfucker, you're right.

Why?

Because it brought us just that little bit closer.

Because we were willing to take that leap of faith.

And at the end of the day, I mean, you're here because at some point you bet on Bill Maher.

You said, I got something that nobody else has got.

And I'm sure somebody told you, you ain't that funny, Bill.

And I heard, you ain't that great.

My own father told me I couldn't fucking sing.

And I'm sure there's somebody out there who would agree with him.

But, you know, 30 million records later and 3,000 concerts later, I guess I'd do something, right?

So I had to navigate all that.

And it's ultimately about, I think life is ultimately about faith.

And that, and I know you're not a religious person, that's where I think you could at least

kind of find common ground with spirituality, which is like, it is ultimately about faith.

Like when people say, well, how do you know there's a God?

And I go, I don't fucking know.

I can't tell you that.

Yeah, that's what faith is.

That's what faith is.

Now, if you want the guy to crack out of the sky and go, you know, like Mel Brooks, like, here I am.

Yeah.

You know what I mean?

I'm God.

That's an interesting story that it happened that quickly, like the wedding night.

You were like.

I felt it.

Yeah.

And it's held.

And not to be so glib as to say it's like a percentage, but wherever we were on the line, The day after I was married, we were closer, and we've gotten closer since.

So that's all I know.

Well, you probably felt good about giving her the thing that gave her peace of mind.

She would say, she would say, you know, I'm a guy.

I complain all the time.

She goes, how many fucking kids do you want?

Like,

I gave up my body, you know, nine months at a time.

Right.

This is my test.

If you want me to prove it to you, I can't.

Right.

But I can point to them

and say, there's my living testament to how I feel about you.

Right.

So that's all I know.

And

I'm not saying this for everybody.

And I would have told you three years ago that it wasn't for me.

Right.

I mean, that was always my issue with marriage was like,

if it doesn't work out, it's like you've purposely put yourself in this prison that is very hard to escape from.

And that's sort of the

argument that they use for getting married.

I mean, I've heard people say that in just so many words.

What, to be imprisoned?

Well,

not imprisoned, in

but

that it's it we want to get married because it would be make it very difficult to break up.

I see.

They feel like they have to put this stricture on that.

I think that's the worst reason.

Okay, but a lot of people do it for that reason.

Well, to me, that's a weak argument.

If somebody says,

you have a big fight, I'm leaving, and you can't, we're married.

You can't just leave.

They like that.

That they then have to work it out because otherwise it's lawyers and money and divorce and terrible, you know, and that's a big reason why people get married.

Yeah,

I had a meeting yesterday with someone about a film project.

And the guy said at the end of the meeting, he's like, look, if we're going to do this together, I need final cut on this project.

And I'm going to say it jokingly because I like the person.

This is Chicago way of saying it.

It's like, motherfucker, if you need final cut, it ain't going to work.

If we're not in this together, I don't care what the fuck you got on a piece of paper.

And that's the same thing I would say with the right marriage.

If you need a piece of paper and a fucking ring, like then it's fucking going to go to work.

But then you did it.

No.

Now, there are legalistic reasons and there are sort of, let's call it

performative reasons.

You know, we present like we're married.

I just think women like it.

Sure.

They do.

They just like it.

It's just, it's, you know, it's just like

they feel like I know.

They just had Woody Allen in here.

Yes.

Okay.

My wife, not that long ago, when she was working as a mater in New York for a restaurant, a mater D.

Mrs.

Woody Allen would call and make a reservation.

And she knew it was Sunyi.

That's Woody's relationship.

And I think she even knew Sunyi for some New York thing.

And she would call and she'd say, this is Mrs.

Woody Allen.

Of course.

Oh, I've known that from many.

I mean, I live in, well, I live in Los Angeles.

We don't know what area.

But I'm just saying in some of the wealthier neighborhoods out here, you know, that's a very important thing that the wife, who sometimes doesn't even like the husband anymore, but they want to be able to call the restaurant and say, I'm Mrs.

Blankety.

Mrs.

Bill Maher.

Mrs.

Bill Marr.

Mrs.

Mrs.

Bill Barr.

Yeah, well, that's not going to happen.

But it's just, it's stature.

I mean, we still have that in society.

It's a certain stature, and it's a certain, I know we're all in the future, we're living in the future, and everything is not like it used to be, but women still are all about, not all of them, but a lot of them are all about, I got a man.

I mean, you know, these women who have like three names,

their first name and then their maiden name, and then it's a dash.

Hillary Rodham Clinton.

Yes, exactly.

It's a way to say, I'm an independent woman, and also, I got a man.

Okay.

And I don't want you to forget, I got a man.

Okay, bitch did you get a man because i got a man his name's clinton or whatever it is yeah like i'm gonna put that at the end of my independent name and that's just human nature so maria

uh lopez marrill lopez i don't know her maria lopez um

but yeah anyway

Have we run out of gas?

I have to get by.

It's one of those weeks.

That's why.

It's just one of those weeks

where, like, last week, everything was easy.

Like, the editorial, just like on Monday night, it was almost all done.

This week, it's just some weeks that just get harder.

And then this big

story today that happened in the middle of the day.

You have a lot to talk about this week.

I really do.

And I'm,

you know, I don't try to get too emotional about things, but there is something about having somebody who was sitting right there and you just got to know as a human being.

And then, I mean, death in itself is just a weird thing.

What's weird, and

I don't mean this in any other way than the way I mean it.

What's weird is we get fixated on how somebody dies.

Like, would it have been better if he got hit by a bus?

You know what I'm saying?

Like, death is death, and that's the sorrow of it.

Actually, it would have been better because...

It would mean that there aren't this seething group of people on both sides who think the answer is to shoot each other.

So yes, it would, Bill, have been better if he was hit by a bus.

It wouldn't have been good, but it wouldn't have been like this.

This is just a place we don't, we keep heading towards, and we don't want to keep barreling down towards.

That's where my mind is at.

Let me ask you.

And also just the idea that, you know,

You got to stop seeing people as the other.

You brought up that whole sectarian thing before.

You're so right.

In Rwanda.

Yeah, remember they were on the radio saying go out and hatch at your neighbors.

I mean, they were literally.

Because they were vermin, because same thing with Hitler.

Because when you make

the people who you don't agree with

the other, the deplorable, the people who you don't even deserve to live,

that's when this shit starts.

So let me ask you, because you are

in the fray on a daily level, what's one thing that you think needs to happen immediately?

Both both sides have to admit they do it stop with the yeah but you know the right wing absolutely true the right wing has been terrible there's a lot of right wing lunatics and nationalists and fucking violent people and marching in Charlottesville and lots of bullshit that goes on and killing

we can't have that argument but because Plainly the left does it too now.

I don't care who started it.

Everybody both started it always in these fights.

It escalates.

It goes up and up and up and up and up.

And then we're just on these two sides screaming at each other.

Stop it.

It has to start with everybody is doing this now and everybody has to stop now.

So we're basically a two-party political system.

Yes.

A two-team.

It's not even about party.

What I'm saying is, do you think there's enough will in the political leadership on both sides of the political aisle to

whether they have to go into a room and say hey we really got to dial this down do you think there's enough political will there no because trump's not going to do that okay

he's not going to do that and the republicans who sat there with their arms folded when biden said political violence has no place and they were like

Yeah, that's not really worth clapping for as long as a Democrat said it.

No, I don't think these people are going to change yet.

You know, I mean, I have a very pessimistic pessimistic view, so I don't want to bring everybody down, although I probably already have with a little bit of this discussion.

But, you know, I just don't see this country coming back until Charlton Heston finds the Statue of Liberty almost buried in the sand with just the,

you know, remember the Statue of Liberty and the end of the movie and the, and then like, okay,

it kind of has to hit rock bottom first.

And, you know,

how far are we from rock bottom?

We're barreling toward it, but we're not there yet because America is still a great fucking country, even with all the bullshit.

Would you, you mentioned other places in the world, would you want to live anywhere else?

Well, when things started to get hairy somewhere in the last eight to ten years, and I sat at many tables with people openly who had success and wealth, they would sort of have these kind of general discussions like.

If something gets bad, bad, bad, where are we going to go?

And everybody would always come to the same conclusion, which is there's nowhere to go.

Well, a lot of them are going to Ireland and buying castles because that's what people do when they've had it up to here with privilege.

They go buy a castle in Ireland.

But yes, I mean, Ellen is decamped there, Rosie O'Donnell.

I just read

Robin Wright has said she's fleeing.

That's her.

Robin Wright Penn.

Robin Wright Penn, yes.

Well, I think she's dropped the pen.

Yes.

And some other people,

you know, they're fleeing.

You know, always the people who lived in...

Would you leave America, Bill?

Fuck no.

Fuck you if you think I'm leaving.

I'm not leaving.

Everything looks good from afar.

Get there.

You'll find a lot of shit.

You know what?

Go buy a castle in Ireland.

Those castles are drafted.

You'll be back, asshole.

But you can't get a castle for cheap.

You know why I know that?

Because I've looked.

Are you serious?

A rock star, Bill.

We look at these things.

Exactly.

Rock stars have to have castles.

Last story.

Last story.

I know you got to go work.

Last story.

I was working with the famous producer.

He's just recently passed away.

Great guy.

Roy Thomas Baker, who produced all the famous Queen stuff.

Roy, very Ponce, very English.

And

he at some point bought a castle.

And we were fascinated, the band, you know, like, tell us all about the castle.

He goes, oh, it was all right, you know, owning a castle.

And he said it was drafty.

You know, you think you get a castle, but then you find out you got to get the power and there's no AC and, right?

The moat is

down.

But, okay, right.

So we're like, okay.

And he goes, he goes, but

that's not the worst part.

We said, what's the worst part?

He goes,

I had to buy the whole village that went with the castle.

And we said, why did you have to buy a village?

He goes, well, who the fuck's going to work on the castle?

Right.

So we had to buy the village.

of the people who had been living in the village for generations because only they knew how to take care of the castle.

That party didn't like.

People here have bought villages.

I think I may be remembering this wrong.

Forgive me if I got the name wrong, but I seem to remember Kim Basinger

bought a town in the south.

Of all the people, she didn't seem like someone who wanted a whole town.

And of course, Jeffrey Epstein had an island.

You know, I mean,

Brando had his own island, Tahiti and Tahiti.

I did look at an island once.

Of course, I'd be so disappointed if you didn't.

It was about 5 million.

Yeah.

Where was it?

Somewhere in the Bahamas.

Oh, nice.

Because Steve Miller had bought an island, the great the Joker.

The Joker.

And at that point, an island seemed like a good idea.

And why didn't you pull the string on that?

I just had this vision of being on my island.

You know, the stars are, you know, it's beautiful tonight.

You know what I mean?

You turn to your loved one.

Here we are on the island.

And you're like, what's that boat approaching, you know,

with the pirates?

I don't know, you know?

And we're all going to die because somebody's going to come on my island.

You would have been the sole resident of the island?

Yes.

That was the attraction, you said.

So there would be no...

Well, but then there's no police department.

That's my point.

There's no good.

It's all good on the island until somebody shows up like

Max Keated in Cape Fear.

There's no hospital.

You know, first you hire him to take care of the island, and next thing you know, your dog disappears.

Yeah.

Now, that's the thing.

You know, you think you're just getting away with $5 million, but then it just

the expenses have just begun.

And the remodeling, oh, I mean, that South Beach area that has all the driftwood.

I mean, somebody's going to have to.

And now you're following my flow here.

Yeah.

Okay.

So I'm staying, Bill.

All right.

I'm glad you are.

You're always such a treat to talk to.

You're such a fun guy to talk to.

So good luck with the podcast.

Tell them all about it.

Magnificent others.

Interview a lot of musicians, but also start interviewing actors.

And thanks to you.

You helped me start that.

And it's been a lot lot of fun, usually about 75 to 90 minutes, very deep dives.

Like us.

But you're funnier.

Where's the band playing?

The band is, we're on our way to Asia

tomorrow.

First time in Japan.

We sold out the Boudicon 25 years apart.

So going to play a sold-out Boudicon show in a couple days.

Asia tour.

First time in the...

You're sure.

In the old days, the rock bands would play the Boudicon, and the Japanese audience was famously quiet.

Like, not because they weren't enjoying, just because it was in the culture.

Is that still the case?

No.

Great.

No, it's like any other audience now.

Really?

I mean, maybe a little quieter just because of the culture, but no.

No.

MTV and YouTube made every audience is the same now.

Shout out.

Essentially.

No, good.

That's so good.

I mean, you notice it like in Norway.

It's a little quieter, but.

But Japan, they're screaming and shouting.

I mean,

Japan's kind of weird in that they're sort of obsessed with the West.

Yeah.

So they're kind of almost

cheering because of what they've seen.

You know, since they adopted a different cultural take to a concert because of the influence of watching how an audience would act in the West.

I don't think they had an organic moment.

They sort of said, oh, we'll take that too.

like a form of dress.

I just remember like the old school bands like the Beatles playing there, and it was like, wow.

It was very unnerving.

It was,

I bet you it was.

I mean, I went to, we went, when Nirvana was at their absolute peak at Round 92, Smells Like Teen Spirit, we went to see them play at a show, and you could have heard a pin drop between songs.

And this is when they were the biggest band in the world.

Right.

I mean, it was literally like deafening silence.

Huh, okay.

How about that for a rap?

We did it all right for a

sad Newsday.

Oh my God, it was like I laughed, I cried.

Yeah.

Club Random is brought to you by Radioactive Media.

If you're a business owner, you can either panic or you can try something that actually works.

That would be audio marketing.

Podcasts and radio now reach more people than social and digital combined.

Yeah.

And unlike social media, you're not competing with cat videos and your aunt's political rants text random to 511-511 today message and data rates may apply

your sausage mcmuffin with egg didn't change your receipt did the sausage mcmuffin with egg extra value meal includes a hash brown and a small coffee for just five dollars only at mcdonald's for a limited time prices and participation may vary coverage varies by plan view contracts and exclusions at indurancewarrty.com if you're driving a car or truck with an expired warranty and suddenly lost your transmission or needed a full engine repair, would it leave you stranded?

I'm Danica Patrick.

Choose the company I trust, Endurance.

If your vehicle is less than 20 years old, Endurance offers auto protection on the drivetrain, AC, and more.

Act now and get one full year of elite benefits, a $2,000 value free.

For your free quote, go to endurancewarranty.com.

That's endurancewarranty.com.