Ben Stiller Returns
Ben sits down with Conan once more to discuss the process of enlisting Tom Cruise for Tropic Thunder, producing a documentary about his parents Jerry Stiller and Anne Meara, and bringing the question of what he’d like to see on TV to the second season of Severance. Later, Conan responds to a voicemail regarding a burglar who was wearing his merch.
For Conan videos, tour dates and more visit TeamCoco.com.
Got a question for Conan? Call our voicemail: (669) 587-2847.
Press play and read along
Transcript
Speaker 1 Say hello to the all-new Alexa Plus and see how Alexa can do so much more for you.
Speaker 3 Need last-minute concert tickets?
Speaker 2 Craving your favorite restaurant?
Speaker 5 Just sit back, relax, and talk naturally.
Speaker 6 Alexa's on it.
Speaker 2 It remembers what you love, anticipates what you need, and makes it all happen.
Speaker 6 Whether you're using Echo, Fire TV, or any compatible device, Alexa Plus brings thousands of possibilities to life.
Speaker 5 Everything.
Speaker 17 The fact that you can just order concert tickets through her, that's that's crazy yeah exactly you didn't know that even i knew that wow yeah and i fought in world war one and i know that ready whenever and yeah and you were born in the second obama administration this is incredible ready whenever inspiration strikes amazon.com slash new alexa
Speaker 25 The LL Bean flannel has been part of the holiday for over a century.
Speaker 26 Cozy, reliable, and made to last.
Speaker 30 It's the shirt you wear when you pick out your tree and when you're home relaxing with a warm cup of cocoa.
Speaker 33 And it's the one you wore in the family photo where somehow everyone's matching without even trying.
Speaker 31 These shirts, these flannels from LL Bean have been around for a long time.
Speaker 36 Yeah, they have.
Speaker 5 They've been around from the olden days.
Speaker 28 I'm going to go churn some butter.
Speaker 37 But first, my LL Bean flannel.
Speaker 38 Oh no, President McKinley has been wounded.
Speaker 32 Anyway, these have been around a long time.
Speaker 40 They're great for the holidays.
Speaker 6 You got to get them.
Speaker 41 Go check out LL Bean Flannel.
Speaker 43 Invited to the holidays since 1912.
Speaker 11 Hi, my name is Ben Stiller.
Speaker 11 And I feel
Speaker 11 about being Conan O'Brien's friend.
Speaker 44 Wow!
Speaker 12 Devastating!
Speaker 45 Falling's here, hear the yell. Back to to school, ring the bell, brand new shoes, walk and loose, climb the fence, books and pens.
Speaker 13 I can tell that we are going to be friends.
Speaker 13 Yes, I can tell that we are going to be friends.
Speaker 46 Hey there, welcome to Conan O'Brien Needs Friend.
Speaker 47 Got a nice little podcast humming along here.
Speaker 27 Got Sonoma Obsession joining us.
Speaker 15 I know I normally say that. Matt Gorley.
Speaker 14 That was adorable.
Speaker 48 Didn't you think?
Speaker 12 It's a nice little podcast we got.
Speaker 50 coming along.
Speaker 51 We got this nice little podcast. Humble.
Speaker 52 We do.
Speaker 53 That's how I feel about it.
Speaker 54 Wow.
Speaker 55 I do.
Speaker 56 I do feel like we got this nice, nothing grand, nothing fancy, nothing you could, you know, you put this on the lot.
Speaker 19 It'll be the last car to go.
Speaker 55 But
Speaker 41 I think it's a sweet little ride.
Speaker 42 You know, I like it.
Speaker 19 I think it's an adorable little podcast, and I'm proud of it. Okay.
Speaker 58 Yeah. That's cute.
Speaker 55 Hey, I got a question for you guys.
Speaker 57 What do you think of my jacket?
Speaker 44 I like your jacket.
Speaker 59 Okay, let me tell you something. Here's the story of this jacket.
Speaker 60 What if I said I didn't like it? Yeah, I hate it.
Speaker 47 I've had people say that before, not about this jacket, but I've had people be very frank with me.
Speaker 58 No, you haven't. Yeah.
Speaker 22 People, if I'm wearing something, they tell me they don't like it.
Speaker 27 I saw this jacket.
Speaker 33 It was not even,
Speaker 33 wasn't that much money.
Speaker 47 I saw it.
Speaker 18 It was a nice color of brown corduroy.
Speaker 61 Let me describe it for those of you who can't see it right now.
Speaker 29 It's a very rich.
Speaker 16 It's got a sheen. It's got a sheen.
Speaker 60 It's got to go a nap, I believe they call it.
Speaker 51 What's that? A nap. You can rub it one way and it'll go darkened and then rub it the other way.
Speaker 62 It'll go light.
Speaker 13 Wow.
Speaker 46 Keep talking. I'll take a nap.
Speaker 44 And
Speaker 44 the blue.
Speaker 51 I also want to say this. I've never said this this before.
Speaker 16 You're absolutely right about that.
Speaker 14 Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 27 Anyway, this is a jacket that it was like the day before Christmas. And I saw this jacket in a store and I tried it on.
Speaker 5 I thought, that's a nice jacket.
Speaker 42 So I just bought it and I drove home and I handed it to my wife and said, just give this to me tomorrow.
Speaker 27 And she said, okay.
Speaker 57 She said, should I wrap it?
Speaker 42 And I went, you don't even have to wrap it.
Speaker 41 And I thought, is that, do either of you two relate to that?
Speaker 67 is that something that happens i've been married now 22 years no is that what happens tack and i send each other exactly what we want and we don't even take it out of the box that it comes in like i send him the link exactly for my son did this as a kid he was really into tech stuff and he would send us like here are the nine things this is the xc755g
Speaker 68 uh whatever something board motherboard just click here and it will be delivered he took all the joy out of just click here.
Speaker 67 It is joy. You know you're getting something exactly, you know, you're getting exactly what you want.
Speaker 57 So, so I um I didn't used to do that, but I think it's just because I'm now in a different stage of life where I'll see something, you know, this isn't that much, it's not, I'm not splurging.
Speaker 27 It's a, it's a corduroy jacket.
Speaker 57 It's perfectly nice.
Speaker 27 I would like to wear that, hand it to my wife.
Speaker 41 She, I think she kept it in the bag. I handed it to to her.
Speaker 12 Yeah. She might have tied it.
Speaker 74 Do you want any surprise?
Speaker 12 No, no, no.
Speaker 73 I do want some surprise.
Speaker 61 How often does a surprise go wrong?
Speaker 44 All the time. It goes wrong all the time.
Speaker 51 You mean like asking a gift from your spouse? It can't go that wrong.
Speaker 55 Yes, it can.
Speaker 67 Unless she's got diamonds on it.
Speaker 15 I don't want it.
Speaker 12 Oh, wow.
Speaker 48 My wife is giving me a bunch of people.
Speaker 12 You're the worst.
Speaker 70 Hello, Jean-Jacques Gabor joining us today on the podcast.
Speaker 13 What kind of awful person are you?
Speaker 76 This is not the person I hired to be my assistant.
Speaker 67 Unless it's got diamonds on on it you've famous changed you no it has I'm being unless it's like nice jewelry that marks a very special occasion I think that's what I was trying to say that's no better no no no it is but it's like you know a 10-year in your anniversary maybe it gets me whatever I don't know but if it's like clothes
Speaker 67 so anything like you want to get the clothes yourself I just know exactly what I want and I don't think other people including tech really know that And I think rather than winging it, here's something I wanted, and here it is.
Speaker 67 Get it for me, and I'm going to take it.
Speaker 33 I'm going to get any way that emasculates TA.
Speaker 67 No, because take away you taking his penis away.
Speaker 16 No, what?
Speaker 81 They'd have to get a new penis, then you'd know what to ask about.
Speaker 67 If you get your penis from doing that, then you're taking your penis away when I bought you this gift.
Speaker 76 What is it?
Speaker 38 A penis!
Speaker 69 I sold my vagina.
Speaker 67 You don't deserve a penis.
Speaker 25 I sold my vagina to get you this penis.
Speaker 76 I sold my penis to buy you a vagina.
Speaker 68 Oh, Henry's worst story.
Speaker 67 So you get stuff for Amanda and she's like, yay.
Speaker 61 She does not do that.
Speaker 71 Okay, I bet you.
Speaker 52 She's a very good actress. Yeah.
Speaker 67 Yeah, she is.
Speaker 70 No, but when you get her ninth, look, it's a chess set made of cork.
Speaker 82 They only made a few of these in the 30s.
Speaker 20 A horrible gift.
Speaker 69 You know,
Speaker 70 does she go, oh my God, this is amazing?
Speaker 21 Or do you ever see a single tear?
Speaker 51 The one time we got in a fight because I bought her an espresso machine and she thought it was too extravagant and she got mad at me.
Speaker 27 She got mad at you because you spent too much money.
Speaker 74 Yeah.
Speaker 44 Maybe I shouldn't tell this on the box.
Speaker 81 No, it's okay.
Speaker 57 And you're keeping it in because, you know, that's fine.
Speaker 42 And you know what? We love your wife and I take her side.
Speaker 18 But it was really expensive.
Speaker 60 It wasn't, I mean, as
Speaker 51 espresso machines go, it's a mid-level espresso machine.
Speaker 79 Well, but maybe, maybe times were tight.
Speaker 5 Maybe she knew that.
Speaker 63 We were fine.
Speaker 67 Does she like espresso? Yes. Okay.
Speaker 51 And she has since come to love that machine, but we got in a fight that day because she was, I can't tell us.
Speaker 36 It's okay.
Speaker 67 It's our clients like that. I'll be like, what, where, where do we put it?
Speaker 69 Do you know what I mean? That was her biggest.
Speaker 67
She's limited real estate in the kitchen. And it's this machine that you got me.
It's like a burden, kind of, but also.
Speaker 67 You know what?
Speaker 33 I'm going to say this.
Speaker 46 If I get anything for the kitchen, I know I'm in very dangerous territory because
Speaker 33 my wife runs the kitchen.
Speaker 13 And if I walk in the door and I'm like, look, it's a giant juicer that only does pineapples.
Speaker 13 And it's made of quartz.
Speaker 58 You know, we got a problem.
Speaker 34 We have to take part of the sink out for it to fit.
Speaker 44 But if you got pineapples, we got pineapple juice.
Speaker 83 Then I know we've got a problem.
Speaker 48 It runs on gasoline,
Speaker 81 Old-fashioned gasoline that's been badly stored.
Speaker 49 Yeah, I know I've done that.
Speaker 27 I've purchased
Speaker 55 a few things for the kitchen, and I noticed that she was very pleasant about it at the time, and then it went away.
Speaker 27 It got exchanged for something else.
Speaker 51
Our Christmas has like slightly decreased. We're now, since we've had a kid too, we kind of are just like three gifts for each other, and that's it.
And it, you know, one's like little or something.
Speaker 14 What?
Speaker 51 You know, we don't, we just get three gifts.
Speaker 41 What is it? The Great Depression?
Speaker 12 What are you talking about? That's true.
Speaker 82 No, with three gifts?
Speaker 12 What?
Speaker 82 No kids are supposed to be, there should be endless.
Speaker 28 No, not for the kid.
Speaker 13 Oh,
Speaker 67 how many kids? How many, what are you talking about? How many presents do you get? Kids?
Speaker 69 Kids have to be flooded with presents.
Speaker 76 Now, first of all, I'm not saying expensive presents, but I'm sorry.
Speaker 38 On the holidays, when kids come down, little kids, it has to be so many presents, it's mind-boggling.
Speaker 25 And I don't care.
Speaker 55 I know people are going to say, well, this is terrible.
Speaker 41 What if people people can't afford it steal them if you have to
Speaker 82 kids have to be just spending hours i agree the room has to be filled with crumpled paper when the when the day is over they had a lot but like
Speaker 67 also i also the four
Speaker 67 yeah not for each other for from amanda
Speaker 51 we get each other We limited our, well, this is her idea.
Speaker 15 Look, I'm not a boy. I want to do more.
Speaker 12 This is awful. But I agree each.
Speaker 75 And I bet one of them is a walnut.
Speaker 44 Okay.
Speaker 17 Here's your walnut.
Speaker 12 I agree.
Speaker 51 I like to go big for Christmas. I've been tailored back.
Speaker 12 Yeah, you've been.
Speaker 44 I really do. Just chill.
Speaker 67 I don't like things.
Speaker 67 I don't want new purses. I don't want new jackets.
Speaker 58 Oh, I know that.
Speaker 42 You've been wearing your Dr.
Speaker 21 Zaya special for like 20 years now.
Speaker 44 Dr.
Speaker 48 Zaya's special. She's got this jacket.
Speaker 83 I know, but I mean, for God's sake, I'll pay for it.
Speaker 70 Get a fucking jacket.
Speaker 67
I get things. I like them.
I use them all the time.
Speaker 82 I know, but that's too much.
Speaker 72 I mean, now it's really.
Speaker 17 Looks like you slept in a bus station or something.
Speaker 81 For God's sake.
Speaker 32 I just slept in a bus station.
Speaker 36 Well, I bet you have. The question is: with who?
Speaker 13 Myself.
Speaker 36 Myself, eh?
Speaker 41 So you were just having a nap.
Speaker 49 I like trying to still do the sexy leering talk
Speaker 84 long after the sexy part's over.
Speaker 36 So you were just by yourself having a nap, huh? Yeah.
Speaker 36 Yeah. Yeah, just wearing a bunky jacket by yourself.
Speaker 44 bunky.
Speaker 84 Listen,
Speaker 17 you've wore that jacket too long.
Speaker 27 We're not going to get stuck on that.
Speaker 26 But get a new jacket.
Speaker 85 It says leather jackets. It's nice and broken in it.
Speaker 44 It's pretty. Yeah, whatever.
Speaker 85 You have jackets that you've worn forever, too.
Speaker 60 I have more than one jacket.
Speaker 15 Can I just get you guys to shut up?
Speaker 13 I do have jackets I've had for a long time, but I wear jackets that you wear. But I have more than one.
Speaker 16 More than one.
Speaker 13 More than one.
Speaker 20 If someone stole your jacket you're freezed to death it's the only jacket you have oh yeah in los angels like purses and i don't like jackets to death in los angeles it's it gets pretty cold
Speaker 31 at night into the 40s some say all right listen we i won that one you guys should do a gift exchange this year oh i'd be so afraid to buy her a gift she'd get mad at me i won't like it
Speaker 51 i'll email you exactly what i want i'm not interested in buying a gift for someone who's forcing you a gift should be about what another person would think would make you happy no what I know.
Speaker 48 Well, that would make happy happy.
Speaker 12 You guys are happy.
Speaker 67 I'm sending him something I know I want. And when he gives it to me, I'll know I'll like it.
Speaker 50 But what if it's something you didn't see?
Speaker 51 Like, I'll go shopping sometime for Amanda, or I'm out and I see her.
Speaker 53 Yeah, and you get her an espresso machine, and the whole thing blows up in your face.
Speaker 16 I know.
Speaker 71 I know.
Speaker 23 I mean, no, that was, you took a chance.
Speaker 52 It didn't go well.
Speaker 51 I am gun shy since then.
Speaker 86 Exactly.
Speaker 67 I buy my mom and dad stuff all the time, and my mom has returned 100% of the presents I've given her.
Speaker 20 her i bought your dad a new mustache and he wears it every day okay you know what i won't stand it's more real than the one he's wearing won't stand for it ridiculous won't stand for it what are you gonna do about it yeah what are you gonna do are you gonna storm out for it i'm gonna stand here sit here upset about it oh sorry
Speaker 75 you're literally just gonna sit there i'm gonna sit down
Speaker 57 all i have to do when i do an impression of her dad is put a finger
Speaker 67 under my nose and there he is there's gil right there that's not gil gil's cooler than you are Gil's so much cooler than you are.
Speaker 67 You have to have the thing, and you have to be cooler, and you can't do that.
Speaker 76 You just did it.
Speaker 66 You just put the finger under your nose to be your dad.
Speaker 24 All right, we're going to wrap it up.
Speaker 13 Anyway, stupid.
Speaker 23 Find out from your spouse about presents. Don't buy that espresso machine.
Speaker 81 It's too expensive.
Speaker 66 Never wear the same leather jacket for more than 30 years in a row.
Speaker 47 These are our suggestions.
Speaker 79 Good night.
Speaker 5 My guest today is a tremendously accomplished actor, filmmaker, and showrunner.
Speaker 26 You know him from, of course, Meet the Parents, Zoolander, and Dodgeball, and just the tip of the ice boig right there.
Speaker 47 He's the director and executive producer of Severance on Apple TV Plus.
Speaker 46 Season two premieres January 17th.
Speaker 8 I am very excited about it because Severance was my jam.
Speaker 52 Ben Stiller, welcome.
Speaker 19 I've contacted you many times through your your people.
Speaker 89 Yeah.
Speaker 8 I often get just, we'll get back to you.
Speaker 44 That's why I have people. Yeah.
Speaker 52 But what's
Speaker 15 weird?
Speaker 75 But can I just say something?
Speaker 68 What's weird?
Speaker 33 The people sound suspiciously like Ben.
Speaker 25 It sounds like Ben picking up and he says, let me get Ben's people.
Speaker 55 And then the people sound a lot like you.
Speaker 11 It's like the guy from that Donald Trump who called into the post.
Speaker 44 Oh, yeah.
Speaker 12 Whatever that guy's name. David Barron or John Barron? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 13 Yeah.
Speaker 19 Well, I've known you a very long time, and I was very excited you're coming in today because you're one of my all-time favorite comedy people.
Speaker 2 Your body of work is fucking crazy stunning.
Speaker 7 We're going to talk about Severance, which was my favorite show.
Speaker 95 That first season was perfection, and I am delighted that Severance is coming back.
Speaker 10 So much so that your people said, I can watch a few episodes.
Speaker 96
And they said, you can watch a couple of episodes of this new season. We'll make them available to you.
And I'm like, no, no, no, I'm re-watching season one to watch season two.
Speaker 97 Okay, good. And I don't want to watch it on a computer.
Speaker 93 Yes.
Speaker 41 I don't want to watch it.
Speaker 35 I want to watch it because I think the direction, which is you, is I know some other people direct, but you direct the majority of these episodes is absolutely fantastic.
Speaker 3 The art design, the acting, the whole thing is through the roof.
Speaker 64 It's delightful. Thank you.
Speaker 14 Conan, I really appreciate that. Thank you.
Speaker 11
No, no, no, mind a lot because you know how much I respect you. Seriously.
Well, I
Speaker 99 joke.
Speaker 31 Well, now people think it's a joke because you said no joke.
Speaker 59 I know.
Speaker 11 I said no joke too quickly or something.
Speaker 44 I don't know.
Speaker 44 I think seriously was the first place I went to.
Speaker 11 And then no joke is trying to save it.
Speaker 12 Yeah, no, I am.
Speaker 19 We're going to talk about it because anyone who's listening to this right now, if you're not watching Severance, if you didn't see season one, go and watch it.
Speaker 64 It is, it's, it's just, I think, flawless.
Speaker 65 And there's so many images in it,
Speaker 7 moments in it.
Speaker 19 And it's got me thinking about so many things.
Speaker 2 So I'm very psyched for season two.
Speaker 97 But along those lines, I just wanted to go back to, I'll just touch on it.
Speaker 89 Met you for the first time.
Speaker 96 We mentioned this last time, but I think it bears repeating. I met you when you came to SNL and right away was doing one of the funniest things I had seen when you played a grown-up Eddie Munster.
Speaker 54 With the whole outfit, but you're jaded now.
Speaker 7 You had done a Tom Cruise film, which was a parody of Color of Money.
Speaker 46 And I looked at that film and I remember thinking, well, why isn't this, this is what Stand Out Live should be, which later on, if you look at what Please Don't Destroy and a lot of the shorts from Lonely Island, it became more these short films, which are just, you know, became more and more of the DNA of the show.
Speaker 19 When you first came along, I was remembered the first thing I saw you do was that short that you had made.
Speaker 95 I think yourself, self-funded or something.
Speaker 11 Yeah, I made it on my own.
Speaker 57 Is it before Ben Stiller's show?
Speaker 11 Yeah, no, this was before anything.
Speaker 11 I was in a play called The House of Blue Leaves off Broadway, and the cast, the play was doing really well, and it moved to Broadway.
Speaker 11 And John Mahoney was in it, and Stockard Channing, and Chris Walken, and this amazing cast.
Speaker 11
And I made this short takeoff with these two guys, Steve Klayman and Ralph Howard. And we put, I kind of put all my money into it that I was making from the show.
And we made this short.
Speaker 11 And then we were like, okay, let's take it somewhere.
Speaker 16 And this was, I mean, it's just a proof of how old I am.
Speaker 11 And we are. Is that
Speaker 99 me?
Speaker 14 I'm not you.
Speaker 12 I met you when I was four years old.
Speaker 44 I know, I know. I forgot.
Speaker 21 I'm 39 years old.
Speaker 74 But there was nowhere to go.
Speaker 11 It wasn't, there wasn't, you know, anything to upload it to at that point.
Speaker 35 So it was like a video cassette.
Speaker 11
And Lovetts had come to the show. He'd seen the show.
And he, uh, and I reached out to him because he came backstage afterwards and he knew my parents and was very nice.
Speaker 11 And he, you know, and I reached out and said, hey, I've got this short. Can you, is there any way you could get them to take a look at it?
Speaker 11 And he literally met me in the lobby at 30 Rock and took the video cassette upstairs.
Speaker 65 I remembered watching it.
Speaker 64 All of us were blown away.
Speaker 95 Your Tom Cruise impression was fantastic.
Speaker 11
I couldn't believe that they were putting it on the air because there was nobody from the show in it. Yep.
And it was Jim Downey. Yep.
Speaker 19 Jim Downey, great, who's been on this podcast,
Speaker 22 amazing head writer.
Speaker 2 When he saw something that was great, he knew this has to just be on.
Speaker 94 I find it so interesting that people can go back and look at that color of money parody that you did and you should, you should look it up and check it out.
Speaker 6 But to me, it was saying, and it occurred to me today, oh, this was the way to go.
Speaker 100 You were ahead of your time, in my opinion.
Speaker 11 I don't know.
Speaker 11 I was just sort of like, honestly, and I've probably talked to you about this before, that, you know, it was for me trying to do what Albert Brooks, who I think was ahead of his time for sure, very much so, yeah.
Speaker 11 In terms of like what he did, his first movie, Real Life, which was about reality television and making fun of it.
Speaker 11 And what he had done on the show and watching that when I was younger and wanting to do that kind of thing.
Speaker 40 When I first saw you, you were doing a spot-on Tom Cruise impression.
Speaker 98 And then you flash forward all these years with Tropic Thunder.
Speaker 60 Yeah.
Speaker 88 And Tom Cruise plays this executive in Tropic Thunder.
Speaker 10 And it is one, I mean, I've talked to Tom Cruise about it.
Speaker 2 It is one of the funniest cameos.
Speaker 7 He comes out of nowhere. And I know that he came to you when you, I don't know if you approached him about playing this character.
Speaker 95 What's the character's name? Is it Lou?
Speaker 24 Les Grossman.
Speaker 59 Les Grossman. Yeah.
Speaker 31 He had like two requests. Jewish.
Speaker 44 Yeah.
Speaker 44 I mean, it's never really stated, but
Speaker 44 it's kind of implied.
Speaker 53 It just occurred to me now that's a Jewish name.
Speaker 68 But he had requests, right?
Speaker 30 He had two requests.
Speaker 77 Correct me if I'm right.
Speaker 33 Or you could say he wanted his hands.
Speaker 11 Yeah, he wanted to have big, thick forearms that were hairy.
Speaker 63 He wanted to be Jewish.
Speaker 15 And he wanted to.
Speaker 11 And
Speaker 11 he wanted to dance.
Speaker 30 And he wanted to dance. And so.
Speaker 74 Again, Jewish.
Speaker 72 Yeah.
Speaker 33 What's crazy to me is that when he said those things to you, you might have been thinking, oh, what?
Speaker 64 I don't know.
Speaker 55 Did you right away say?
Speaker 11 No, I was, I mean, it's a strange set of circumstances the way that this happened we had done this little short for the mtv movie awards where i played as stuntman
Speaker 11 and that's where we and we had met a couple of times over the years before that but then we had really had a great time doing that together and had stayed in touch since then and i had had this idea for the movie for a long time and had been working on it with justin thoreau um and eton cohen came on later and we finally had this script and i had talked to tom about it originally i wanted tom to play my part.
Speaker 16 Oh, really? Yeah.
Speaker 80 Yeah.
Speaker 11 But I was like a little bit, I was like too, really too nervous to ask him to do it.
Speaker 12 Yeah.
Speaker 15
Because he's Tom Cruise. Sure.
Yeah.
Speaker 11 He has other stuff to do.
Speaker 44 Yeah.
Speaker 11
And we were friendly and hanging out. He was so nice and just the greatest guy.
And, but I didn't like want to bother him really with this.
Speaker 11 But I eventually sent him the script and he was like, this is, this is,
Speaker 11
this is great. I'd love to be a part of this.
And I was like, well, maybe you could play, there's like an agent role. He's like, well, no, I've played an agent before.
Yeah. Jerry Maguire.
Yeah.
Speaker 11
He said, but it was his idea, this character. He said, you don't have a studio exec in the movie.
Perfect. Yeah.
Speaker 11 So this was like three months or maybe like two and a half months before we started shooting. And Justin and I were like, well, Tom is, you know, would like to be in the movie.
Speaker 11
And he had this idea of playing a studio exec. And so we went back and came up with Les Grossman.
And it changed the whole plot of the movie, but made it so much better. Oh, it's.
Speaker 11
And I think he has a very, you know, an amazing instinct about movies. He's so smart.
Like, it's crazy how, you know, he's a really, he's a student of movies.
Speaker 11
And he's just, he had this feeling like there, you need this element to the story. So there was no element what was happening back in the States the whole time in the Tropic Thunder story.
And so
Speaker 11 we came up with this and Justin wrote a bunch of those monologues where he just goes off.
Speaker 5 But at the end, when he started.
Speaker 11 And then he said he wanted to dance, yeah.
Speaker 95 When he starts dancing.
Speaker 43 First of all,
Speaker 100 I talked earlier, we started out about your body of work, and it's it is crazy.
Speaker 7 There's so many movies that you've directed, which have so many moments in them where I go, like, okay, that's one of my favorite comedy moments.
Speaker 33 Zoolander, the gasoline station fight,
Speaker 46 when they're throwing gasoline on each other and laughing in slow motion
Speaker 56 is one of the funniest things I've ever seen.
Speaker 30 It delights me every time I think about it.
Speaker 19 Also, when you and Owen are trying to hack into a computer and you you become more or less apes.
Speaker 75 So there's also a 2001 reference.
Speaker 11 But I have to tell you something because I was actually for another project, I'm working on this documentary.
Speaker 11 I was looking through some of this old behind the scenes footage from Zoolander that I have. And
Speaker 11 I found an old, this was literally last week, I found an old cut of the gasoline fight.
Speaker 11 And I had forgotten that originally, you know, they light, he lights the cigarette.
Speaker 11 And I think the way it is in the movie I watch for, it's like he lights a cigarette, I go, oh no, and then boom, they blow up.
Speaker 11 But originally, it was he lights a cigarette and I go, oh no, and you watch the flame kind of like he drops the match on the floor and you see the flame like, you know, kind of track under the car and go up.
Speaker 11 And then it goes up and it starts engulfing each one of the models.
Speaker 44 Oh my God.
Speaker 90 And it literally goes on for, I'm not kidding, for like maybe like two minutes where they're just like dancing in pain
Speaker 44 yeah
Speaker 41 but you know it's great that is but you know it's great ben that's a master class in the difference between this this way is funny this way is not it's awful
Speaker 69 and you can't really explain why but
Speaker 54 no no when you watch it you see it's awful like
Speaker 50 the long and also this is like you know to the year 2000 yeah year 2000 where
Speaker 55 four real like you know cg effects, where like we had three stuntmen doused in those, like the jelly where they put the jelly on and actually be so they're on fire for real doing this.
Speaker 52 And then the explosion was a real explosion that like knocked the windows out of the buildings across the street because it was like bigger than our guy thought it was going to be.
Speaker 44 Oh my God.
Speaker 52 It's just like a different time.
Speaker 13 But that is a great,
Speaker 19 like I say, if you ever teach a class on comedy,
Speaker 68 which would sell out, just the idea idea of this is the way we showed it in the movie.
Speaker 12 Yay.
Speaker 82 Let me show you a way that we didn't go in.
Speaker 44 People crying and screaming.
Speaker 48 If it bends, it's funny.
Speaker 44 Yes, no, it's true. Yeah.
Speaker 39 This message is brought to you by AppleCard.
Speaker 9 Get rewarded for your holiday shopping.
Speaker 5 Earn daily cash back on every purchase made with Apple Card, no matter where you shop and no matter who you're shopping for.
Speaker 3 Use your daily cash back on anything from stocking stuffers to a treat for yourself.
Speaker 56 Happy Christmas to me.
Speaker 43 The choice is yours.
Speaker 23 Apply in the wallet app on your iPhone today, subject to credit approval.
Speaker 3 Apple Card issued by Goldman Sachs Bank, USA, Salt Lake City, branch terms and more at applecard.com.
Speaker 41 Macy's has a new parade this year: a parade of deals.
Speaker 41 So if you're standing on the street waiting for that parade to go by, because you took this literally, you're going to be wasting your time.
Speaker 38
Wake up, kids. It's a parade.
Where is it?
Speaker 53 A parade of deals.
Speaker 43 What?
Speaker 12 Kid crying.
Speaker 3 Every day from now through November 27th, Macy's is featuring a new must-have deal that will last only one day.
Speaker 64 We're talking about daily deals on things you'll love, like a super cozy UG fluff throw.
Speaker 34 Hey, try and say that.
Speaker 3 Even if you say it slowly, you'll probably mess it up.
Speaker 28 Ugfluff throw, an upgraded Dyson vacuum.
Speaker 91 That's nice.
Speaker 28 And some of your favorite fragrances, hair products, jewelry, too.
Speaker 53 Oh, and don't forget, Black Friday deals start November 10th.
Speaker 49 So remember, this isn't a real parade.
Speaker 64 It's a parade of deals.
Speaker 43 I was fooled.
Speaker 3 Don't bring a balloon and get all excited.
Speaker 23 Your daily thrill starts now.
Speaker 3 Shop now at Macy's.com or in store.
Speaker 9 This is an ad by BetterHelp.
Speaker 79 It's that time of year.
Speaker 7 Holidays are upon us.
Speaker 2
I think it's a good idea to reach out to people. Yeah.
You know, we've talked about this.
Speaker 3 It's good to try and just keep in touch with friends, family. As the seasons change, shorter days don't have to weigh you down.
Speaker 3 This season, BetterHelp encourages you to reach out, check in on friends, reconnect with loved ones, and remind them that you're here. So it could help you, it could help the person you're calling.
Speaker 22 You never know.
Speaker 3 Just like it takes just a little courage to send that text to grab coffee with someone you haven't seen in a while, reaching out for therapy can feel difficult too, but it can really be worth it.
Speaker 3 It can leave people wondering, why didn't I do this sooner? With over 30,000 therapists worldwide, BetterHelp is one of the leading online therapy platforms.
Speaker 9 BetterHelp therapists are fully qualified.
Speaker 3 BetterHelp does the initial matching work for you so you can focus on your therapy goals.
Speaker 8 And that's a huge deal.
Speaker 2 You don't have the burden of trying to figure out who's the right person.
Speaker 11 Really nice.
Speaker 101 They'll give it a shot.
Speaker 8 And if it doesn't work, you can switch very easily.
Speaker 3 This month, don't wait to reach out.
Speaker 2 Whether you're checking in on a friend or reaching out to a therapist, BetterHelp makes it easier to take the first step.
Speaker 4 Our listeners get 10% off their first month month at betterhelp.com slash Conan.
Speaker 60 That's better, H-E-L-P dot com slash Conan.
Speaker 7 In Tropic Thunder, when you're running across the bridge and you...
Speaker 8 When the kid gets thrown, I got on the floor.
Speaker 63 It's so wrong in every way.
Speaker 22 It's so wrong in every way.
Speaker 11 Like there's not anything else that's wrong in that movie.
Speaker 37 No, no.
Speaker 44 There's so much that.
Speaker 44 nothing comes to mind.
Speaker 41 But absolutely.
Speaker 64 So just the body of work, Reality Bites, Cable Guy has so much funny shit in it.
Speaker 11
Well, like all those are collaborations with people. And for me, that's always been the thing.
It's like, I love working with people who are funny. And, you know, it doesn't just come from me.
Speaker 11 It's, you know, it's.
Speaker 2 Well, I could always tell that because all those years when I was doing the late night show, through all your different stages, you would always show up and want to and say, Okay, let's do something.
Speaker 30 And you would come with ideas and then you would spend a long time making the idea this great idea come to life, working with other people, working with us.
Speaker 22 And then you would do this thing and it would be on it, you know, 12:50 at night on NBC.
Speaker 8 And you either saw it or you didn't.
Speaker 22 This was before internet.
Speaker 26 And it was, I mean, it's great.
Speaker 89 It was just great.
Speaker 11 And I have, for this documentary, I've been working on, I've been looking at some of that old stuff. And it's just, I mean, I'm like, what was I thinking?
Speaker 99 Because it's such a commitment.
Speaker 11 And I, I mean, besides just looking at myself 30 years ago, whatever it is, and just like kind of like my attitude and like coming in with like, hey, I'm going to be funny. And, you know what I mean?
Speaker 11 Or like, I'm going to like have an attitude with you.
Speaker 99 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 54 But you were great.
Speaker 11 You played along and you were always so open to it. And you were always like, okay, let's go for it and let's do it.
Speaker 63 Right. It was just a blame.
Speaker 91 It was now I look back on it and I think, wait a minute, we were doing a 1230 show and Ben Stiller would come by and work all day on doing a nine-minute comedy piece for us.
Speaker 25 But I was thinking,
Speaker 52 how did that happen?
Speaker 79 Like, that's that, I mean, I, I, I did something right in a previous life.
Speaker 52 Yeah,
Speaker 11 but also, you know, I was thinking about it because like I had to do a talk show next week and I was thinking, okay, what am I going to do?
Speaker 11 And I should think, and then I'm like, we'll just, we'll talk and we'll be fine.
Speaker 48 And I realized, I'm just like, I don't have the energy for you.
Speaker 12 No, it's not at all.
Speaker 37 Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 12 Like, it'll be good.
Speaker 44 We'll come over. No,
Speaker 44 that's the problem.
Speaker 53 Is a late night host now would look at, like, oh, no, I saw you.
Speaker 81 You did Jesus Christ superstar with Conan.
Speaker 82 So we thought maybe you could do a thing where you're Godzilla.
Speaker 77 And you're like, no, I just want to come out in a good Tom Ford suit.
Speaker 44 Exactly.
Speaker 69 Chat about my work.
Speaker 11 Yeah. I'm tired.
Speaker 13 Are you?
Speaker 7 I heard you were working on a documentary about your parents.
Speaker 99 Yeah, that's.
Speaker 6 I wanted to talk about that because
Speaker 30 I grew up watching your parents, the great Anne Mira Jerry Stiller. And I remember they were kind of ubiquitous when I was a kid.
Speaker 19 I thought they were really funny.
Speaker 10 I'd see them on like Love American Style or there'd be these different, they'd be in ads.
Speaker 97 And I just knew, oh, these are these really funny people, but I didn't know exactly who they were.
Speaker 19 And then later on, they came on the show in their own right.
Speaker 94 Of course, your dad was on Seinfeld, very well known that way.
Speaker 11 Yeah, I mean, they had, yeah, they were a comedy team.
Speaker 97 An old school comedy team.
Speaker 11 Old school comedy team from this, you know, they started in the late 50s, early 60s, and were two young actors who met and fell in love, got married really quickly, and then we're became starving actors in New York.
Speaker 11 And after five or six years, tried to figure out a way that they could make some money.
Speaker 11 And my dad was the guy who always wanted to be a comedian, grew up during the Depression, idolized Eddie Cantor, people like that.
Speaker 11
And my mom wanted to be, just wanted to be a serious actress, but she was really funny and really talented. And my dad had this idea that they should do an act.
So he pulled her into it. Interesting.
Speaker 74 Yeah.
Speaker 27 And did they do like Sullivan and all those shows?
Speaker 60 They did. Yeah.
Speaker 63 They did Sullivan,
Speaker 11
I think it's 30, I always get it wrong. It's like 36 or 37 times.
Wow. And it kind of kind of made their career.
Yes.
Speaker 97 And that's, that's about it.
Speaker 97 I had a memory, I have a sense memory of them because there was that era where, you know, a comedy team could come into people and talk about like half the country would be watching them do a routine.
Speaker 11 I mean, it was, yeah, that's part of the story is that, you know, the pressure that was on them as live performers, which, you know, a pressure you know as doing what you do.
Speaker 11 It's, but, but for them, not like every time they went out, they had to get re-invited back by Sullivan and they had to do well.
Speaker 11 So, you know, that was, and then they had to do like five, it wasn't like two minutes. It was, it was like six or seven minutes, you know.
Speaker 19 It's hard for people to know now because there's 75, there's an infinite number of outlets.
Speaker 97 So there's no such thing as, well, I, I came on Conan, but I came on one of
Speaker 105 Conan's late night show a couple of years ago and he wasn't pleased.
Speaker 6 So we're through in the business.
Speaker 19 Well, no.
Speaker 2 There's a billion other places to go.
Speaker 8 There's no such thing as
Speaker 59 you're through, kid.
Speaker 55 You displeased me.
Speaker 57 But this was a different era where if Sullivan didn't like you and there was a problem, that was it.
Speaker 13 That could be it.
Speaker 11 Yeah. And luckily, he liked them.
Speaker 11 They did a number of different sketches every time they come out, but then they finally hit on this one sketch where basically they played off the fact that my dad was Jewish, my mom was Irish Catholic, and they had
Speaker 11 these two characters meeting off of a computer dating, and it was Hershey Horowitz and Mary Elizabeth Doyle.
Speaker 12 It's funny now. It's funny.
Speaker 11
And it was controversial at the time because, you know, they didn't know if people would go for it. But Ed Sullivan's wife, he was Catholic, but his wife was Jewish.
Oh, wow.
Speaker 64 And he loved it.
Speaker 11 And that was sort of, you know, he kept on inviting them back. And that's, yeah.
Speaker 11 But, you know, you're in the documentary because there are so many, you know, these talk show appearances, you know, I'm kind of also looking at it through the lens of, you know, for me over the years, being asked about them, you know, and so many times and really trying to figure out like, well, what is it, like, like, what was it like being their, their son?
Speaker 44 You know, what, who were they?
Speaker 11 What, what was, you know, what's the core of what my experience was with them as parents? And stuff I never really questioned until you start doing something like this and you start looking into it.
Speaker 11 But we went on with you once and
Speaker 11 there was a bit that I was sick and my mom was taking care of me and my mom and dad came out with me on the show.
Speaker 44 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 63 Yeah. And it's so funny.
Speaker 11 It's so funny.
Speaker 91 No, those are, are, I mean,
Speaker 26 you know, the, and then I have to tell you another thing, too.
Speaker 11 So I've been working on this thing for like four years. And
Speaker 11 as a documentary develops, you start to, I've never made a documentary before.
Speaker 11
And what I'm learning is that as it goes along, you start to figure out really what it's about through the process of editing. Yeah.
And then you think it's one thing for like a year or two.
Speaker 11 And then you realize, oh, no, I got to have more of this story or, you know, I have to have more.
Speaker 11 For me, it's been more of like, oh, personally, like really like getting into like what is, was my experience with them because, you know, that's, I'm the one making the movie. And
Speaker 11 we, we figured out this part of it that I, I've always felt, which was my dad on Seinfeld was, um,
Speaker 11 you know, he was so angry, right? And that was, what was so funny was to see him blow up and scream.
Speaker 65 So funny shouting.
Speaker 11
Yes. Yeah.
Yeah. Amazing.
And I always felt it was because he had all this suppressed inner rage in him that he kind of kept down.
Speaker 11 You know, he loved my mom. They were like, you know, he was the most loving, generous guy, but he had like, he had to sublimate a lot.
Speaker 11 And over the years, doing their act together, the, the, the sort of the dynamic between them was that she would kind of like, you know, shut him up a lot, you know, like Jerry, Jerry, stop talking, stop talking.
Speaker 11 And I have all these clips, you know, from the 70s of them on all these talk shows doing that.
Speaker 11 And I thought, you know, when he finally hit it with on Seinfeld, it was because he was able to let out all of that inner, you know, all that inner rage.
Speaker 11 And, and I was trying to find a sound bite
Speaker 11
to sort of, you know, explain that where he talked about it. And I couldn't find one.
And I was driving home. This was like literally like a month ago.
Speaker 11 I'm driving home and I put on, you know, your serious XM station. And it's literally, it's my, it's a clip of my dad on the show, on your show.
Speaker 11 And you're asking him about, you know, Costanza and why is he so funny? And my dad said, this was like literally, he says, as I turn it on, he says, it's because I had all this inner rage.
Speaker 12 Jesus.
Speaker 12 Yeah.
Speaker 99 And I literally like pulled the car over and like, you know, texted my editor.
Speaker 15 And yeah, isn't that insane?
Speaker 52 That's fantastic.
Speaker 11 And we pulled the clip out, and it's in the movie along with the other things.
Speaker 41 Well, I don't give you permission to use it.
Speaker 44 That's actually why I'm here.
Speaker 12 And I'm editing this part out of the podcast.
Speaker 77 Let's come up with a number, gang.
Speaker 44 I knew that.
Speaker 37 That is, that is.
Speaker 44 That's great.
Speaker 11 I felt like it was my dad and the ether or something, just like this moment was happening.
Speaker 40 Well, first of all, I love that.
Speaker 79 I love that.
Speaker 40 And I do think that it was so nice that your dad got to have that role.
Speaker 19 And then he's in King of Queens after that.
Speaker 73 And so he has this whole
Speaker 65 generation that knows him from that stuff.
Speaker 10 You know what I mean?
Speaker 35 Which is sweet.
Speaker 11 He always wanted that. You know, he had had so much success with my mom, but then there was a period of time after
Speaker 11 when being a comedy team was not something that was as viable in show business.
Speaker 11 As you go into the 80s and the 90s, it's not like there's shows that are, you know, like the Merc Griffin show or the Ed Sullivan show.
Speaker 11 It's just so they were having to figure out their careers separately.
Speaker 11 And then, you know, Seinfeld happened for him in his 70s and it changed. You know, it just fulfilled everything that he'd wanted.
Speaker 11 And my mom wasn't as important to her because she was, I think, happier to kind of stay at home and write and read biographies, do the Sunday Times crossword puzzle.
Speaker 11
But my dad, that's what was, it was, you know, if he was so connected to the audience, to being recognized, it meant so much to him. Yes, yes.
Because he was so deprived as a kid.
Speaker 6 His parents, he had such a tough child.
Speaker 11 His dad was a cab driver. You know, they lived, they moved 13 different times when he was a kid over the course of a few years.
Speaker 11 And, you know, so he was just like both loving and needy, but like in the
Speaker 11 most generous way.
Speaker 11 and you know he might they would like someone come up to him on the street and you know recognize him he'd be with my mom and he'd talk to them for like 15 minutes and my mom would be like jerry let's get the out of here come on this guy knows me exactly
Speaker 52 i'll do a dance for you whatever you want boy do i relate to that yeah i didn't get i didn't get any of that by the way
Speaker 55 It's funny because I know you did
Speaker 2 early on, you're a musician, drummer.
Speaker 41 Well, it's just sort sort of super early on, but did you ever think that was going to be it?
Speaker 11 Or did you always know? No, I was not a great drummer.
Speaker 74 I was just
Speaker 91 a terrible drummer.
Speaker 32 I know you were in a band called Capital Punishment.
Speaker 52 Capital Punishment, yeah. Right.
Speaker 22 I was in a band called The Bad Clams, and I was a drummer, and then I told them, I'm out.
Speaker 77 I don't have time for this. I've got other things.
Speaker 55 And I remember thinking, good luck without me.
Speaker 33 And they replaced me with a drum machine.
Speaker 37 Oh.
Speaker 13 And it sounded like a little.
Speaker 51 Can we leave that on this podcast?
Speaker 83 And people were just like, whatever.
Speaker 49 It's better it's keeping time correctly but yeah that was just a that was a that was a moment for you
Speaker 11 yeah i it was i had a friend in high school who was the band leader and he was really talented we're still friends chris roebling and but i i was not a great drummer i really wasn't great at keeping time what is that um documentary about ginger baker ginger baker yeah that one yeah from cream yeah there's a great documentary about him and he's like so like hard ass in terms of like you got to like either you have time or you don't have time oh and in that documentary they're saying things like like, you mean great, like a great drummer like,
Speaker 105 you know,
Speaker 95 Keith Moon from The Who, and he goes, no, I'm talking about real drum.
Speaker 19 I mean, people are mentioning icons to him or John Bonham from Let's.
Speaker 81 And he's like, no, I mean a real drum.
Speaker 22 I mean, this guy who thinks of like maybe three people in the universe are real drummers and everyone else is just shite.
Speaker 17 Yes.
Speaker 41 You have,
Speaker 11 just in addition to these movies you're directing and you had all this crazy success as an actor and then it you've sort of made a conscious decision to step back a little from that I'd say in the last five seven years and say okay what I really want to do is craft things direct produce was that was a conscious decision yeah it was a moment that kind of hit me um I've always I always loved directing since I was a kid so like that and then you know I was directing a lot of these movies I was in over the years but I never had except for Cable Guy, I never directed anything that I wasn't in, but I always thought of myself more as a director than an actor, really.
Speaker 11 I felt like that was more where I was, I thought I was better at that. Definitely not a live performer for my short time on SNL.
Speaker 11
It was so nerve-wracking for me to be, it's still anytime doing something live. It's like, you know, I don't enjoy it.
I'm happy when it's over.
Speaker 11 And if it goes well, it's great. But so directing to me was always like a comfort area and just happy, you know, it just made me happy.
Speaker 11 And so it was really after Zoolander 2 came out. That was like sort of the inflection point where it's like the movie, you know, didn't do well.
Speaker 11 It was not well received. And it was this moment in time where I was like, oh, man, you know, like, what am I going to do? What do I want to do next?
Speaker 11 And I had some space just to kind of like think about it. And then this project that I'd been developing kind of right when the movie came out,
Speaker 11 Escape at Danamora, this
Speaker 11 limited series about this prison escape in New York that happened in 2015, I think,
Speaker 11 that was there. And I had the time to work on it because I wasn't doing other stuff.
Speaker 100 First of all, Escape at Danamora, I love that.
Speaker 10 And I loved, to me, it's about you get to craft something.
Speaker 88 You get to take some time.
Speaker 63 I know how much.
Speaker 2 telling a story visually is important to you.
Speaker 79 And so you get time to, let's get this exactly the way we want it.
Speaker 98 And I always think think the plus and minus of doing things that are live or done quickly is we'll grab it.
Speaker 94 It may not go our way.
Speaker 101 Sometimes when it goes well, you get the rush.
Speaker 2 When it goes badly, it's over and it's time to do another one.
Speaker 10 But if you get to really craft something, it's a very different feeling, I would guess.
Speaker 19 Over a long period of time, you get to think about what is this going to look like?
Speaker 24 How am I going to tell this story?
Speaker 11 Right. And which is daunting too, you know, because it's like, all right, how do I do this?
Speaker 11 But it's also, to me, it's like sort of the most subjective thing where you just, okay, you know, how would, how do I see this? How would I want to see this?
Speaker 11 I think when I just got to the idea of like, basically, like, what would I want to see?
Speaker 11 What would, because I do love comedy and I loved comedies growing up, but I also really love just dramatic movies.
Speaker 11 So I just started thinking, like, well, what would I want to see? And with Escape of Dammore, I was like, yeah, I would love to see this if it was a movie, limited series, whatever.
Speaker 11 And the vibe and the feeling, I think, for me was so much, like it was so clear.
Speaker 11 And yeah, then you just take the time and work again, collaboratively with people who you think are really talented and you have a similar sensibility.
Speaker 11 And, you know, you have these partners. You're a cinematographer, production designer, costume designer.
Speaker 11 Dan Amora was Michael Tolkien and Brett Johnson, these two great writers.
Speaker 11 And, you know, the truth of what happened in that story was, to me, was sort of like what I was like most interested in because it scared me too because I'd never done a prison escape
Speaker 11 movie and I was like all right well I have no idea how to like how do I do this and make it real how do I make it feel authentic and so I just went to the real facts and the and and the more I learned about what actually happened and got to the real places I just said all right I'm just gonna go for the real thing because that was what was fascinating to me about that story was that how could a prison escape like this happen in 2015 that feels like something out of like Escape from Alcatraz or something yeah you don't think it's possible anymore Yeah.
Speaker 11 And then you realize, oh, there's like the system that's in place at this old prison.
Speaker 11 You know, it's, it's, there's so many places where, you know, things can go wrong and also the hierarchy of how it works there in terms of with the guards and the prisoners and,
Speaker 11
you know, the... I mean, the dynamics in a prison, it's a huge prison, too.
So, you know, it's like its own little, you know, city or something.
Speaker 11 And so the more I talked to real people who experienced it and got the details, I was just, that was really fun for me.
Speaker 11 And then cinematically, yeah, it's fun to figure out how to do something that, you know, hopefully will look cool and be intriguing.
Speaker 46 Did you ever consider being in prison for several years?
Speaker 20 Do you really?
Speaker 36 I mean, if you really, I'm sorry,
Speaker 73 if you really wants to capture the story, I think you should have.
Speaker 22 If you took it seriously, I think you would have done three years in prison.
Speaker 20 Three years.
Speaker 45 If you want, you know what I mean?
Speaker 75 I thought you did a fantastic job, but think about what you could have done if you had been in prison.
Speaker 11 If I'd actually experienced it.
Speaker 51 Would you you ever consider going to prison for three years?
Speaker 44 I would like to be put in prison.
Speaker 53 Many of our listeners want me in prison right now.
Speaker 2 Well, this leads me nicely to Severance because I'm lucky enough to be friendly, friends with, and encounter people all the time, especially in the comedy world and acting world.
Speaker 95 And so I kind of semi-know Adam Scott. And my wife and I watch Severance when it comes out.
Speaker 88 And I shortly after that, I see Adam Scott and I said,
Speaker 2 that was the best thing that's been on television
Speaker 19 in memory. That was fantastic.
Speaker 31 And he's like, Oh, you know, thanks a lot, man.
Speaker 63 And I was like, No, no, no.
Speaker 33 And I like, I think I put my hand on his chest.
Speaker 60 Like, no, no, no.
Speaker 53 You don't understand.
Speaker 55 Like, I know there's a show business thing.
Speaker 49 Well, I wonder, he's have you felt his chest?
Speaker 12 I have not.
Speaker 44 Well, you haven't lived then.
Speaker 12 No, but my
Speaker 33 the other way, there's a show business thing of, hey, man, I saw your thing.
Speaker 65 It was really good.
Speaker 33 And it's, it's, uh,
Speaker 75 you'll say it about me at some point, but
Speaker 44 that's so sad.
Speaker 69 But it'll come out naturally, or we'll edit it in.
Speaker 15 And we'll touch your chest.
Speaker 54 But
Speaker 33 it was very important to me to let him know, no, no, no, no, I'm not doing that thing.
Speaker 22 I'm doing this other thing where, and he was, you know, appreciative, I think, and then just wanted to get away.
Speaker 17 But
Speaker 101 the quality of the storytelling, the intricacy of it, the respect, the respect it has for the audience, it's so smart.
Speaker 2 And there's so many layers to it that there's what, I mean, I've, I've gone into deep dives where people discuss, you know, just various levels of it and it all holds up because when you put that much thought into something, it's really beautiful when people appreciate it and see it and start to go like, oh, wait a minute, what do you think's going on?
Speaker 6 And the whole concept of severance is fantastic.
Speaker 11 Yeah, that's great to hear in that the trust you can have for the audience, which you, you have to sort of like take a sort of runner on and kind of, you know, just go, okay, I'm going to believe that they're going to get this.
Speaker 11 But, you know, you never go bad when you don't underestimate the audience.
Speaker 60 You know what I mean?
Speaker 74 Because
Speaker 11 people are smart. And especially now, people watch television so closely and they appreciate it so much and they look forward to it.
Speaker 11 And so that's a great thing to know that people will pick up these little things.
Speaker 11 But we made the show in a bubble during COVID with no, you know, no, you know, you make the whole series and then you put it out.
Speaker 85 So there's no
Speaker 30 You don't know.
Speaker 19 You've basically built this giant contraption and you put it out there and you don't know, is it going to work?
Speaker 28 Yeah.
Speaker 59 What if people watch the first episode and say, I don't care?
Speaker 11 It's not like the opposite of doing like a late night show or something where, right, you're getting feedback every day.
Speaker 24 Every second. Right.
Speaker 11 Right. And so it was one of the great experience making it.
Speaker 11 And then near the end, I was like, oh, I hope, wow.
Speaker 80 I hope people, like, I hope people get it.
Speaker 54 I hope they like it.
Speaker 99 This is, we've been working on this thing for a couple couple of years.
Speaker 11 Like, this could be either good or it could just be like, oh, you know, maybe nobody's going to even see it.
Speaker 95 Well, the reaction was
Speaker 81 insane.
Speaker 55 It was great.
Speaker 11 It's as great as anything I've been a part of. And, you know, and you know, being in the business so long, like you never know how people are going to react to stuff.
Speaker 11 And when it's great, it's so great. And when it's not great, it sucks.
Speaker 11 But it's not that different, the experience of whatever you make, you know, something that gets well received or not, it's you're still putting your all into it.
Speaker 19 Well, I've always said it takes a lot of talented people working really hard to make something shitty.
Speaker 19 Meaning, when you see something and everyone sits around and hate watches it or says, this is bad, that was a lot of oftentimes very talented people working really hard and it just didn't come out quite the way they want it to, or it came out at the wrong time, or whatever.
Speaker 37 Whatever it is.
Speaker 92 Whatever it was.
Speaker 32 And then those same people can work on something and it can be absolutely amazing.
Speaker 11
And you're all in on it the whole time. Yeah.
So you can't go back.
Speaker 63 And it's just sort of like, okay, so this is it.
Speaker 30 There are these moments.
Speaker 94 I talked to you earlier about there are always these moments in your work where I remember them.
Speaker 7 They're really fantastic. There was a moment.
Speaker 19 There's so many moments in the first season of Severance that were,
Speaker 101 first of all, the look of it.
Speaker 8 And there are moments as where I think you as a director, the use of corridors and ceilings.
Speaker 61 Like
Speaker 2 when I watch this show, I feel like I'm down underground and I'm in that place.
Speaker 33 And it's a very specific,
Speaker 40 the lighting, the look of it, the vibe.
Speaker 8 You've got these great wide, like flat shots sometimes.
Speaker 2 And it does feel a little bit like a Kubrick or something.
Speaker 22 It's just like all the references are absolutely incredible and bears re-watching.
Speaker 2 Like you can re-watch it over and over and over again.
Speaker 92 It's really hypnotic.
Speaker 2 But there's a moment with the actor, he plays Lance.
Speaker 102 Is it Tremel Tillman? Yeah.
Speaker 30 There's a moment.
Speaker 59 I'm not giving anything away where he goes into a dance in this first season.
Speaker 19 And it's my favorite moment in television of that year because it's not part of his character, but then he goes into this kind of dance.
Speaker 19 And the way you shoot it, and I think I've watched it like 20 times.
Speaker 33 I don't know this gentleman.
Speaker 52 Please tell him I'm his biggest fan.
Speaker 25 But that was my favorite moment.
Speaker 26 It was so, it came at me in such a weird way from the side.
Speaker 29 You know what I mean? It came through my peripheral vision and it was so fantastic.
Speaker 33 And the way it was scored, the music, and the tension building while he's doing this kind of what's supposed to be a joyous thing.
Speaker 55 It was, yeah, it's sort of David Lynch.
Speaker 33 It's everything.
Speaker 29 It's like 15 different
Speaker 11 confluence of events that came together. I didn't even know he was going to dance like that.
Speaker 54 It's dancing.
Speaker 48 It's dancing.
Speaker 76 It's like that.
Speaker 11 It's the same thing Tom Cruise dancing.
Speaker 52 Like, I didn't know Tom Cruise was going to dance like that.
Speaker 51 Did this guy have in his contract, though?
Speaker 11
No, but, you know, that was also, yeah, one of those things where it was just like, I was, I felt the same way watching it. I was like, oh, this is so cool.
And I love watching this.
Speaker 11
I could watch it over and over again. And I think as a director, you kind of, it's not like you want to like say, oh, my work is great.
It's like you, as you're almost like an audience.
Speaker 11
You have to act as an audience. And you're the sort of like, you have to make the choices based on being an audience that you're projecting would be watching something.
Yeah. So I was, I love it too.
Speaker 11
I was like, I love watching. I was like, oh, this is really fun.
I could watch this all day.
Speaker 101 At the heart of this show is this concept.
Speaker 93 And again, this isn't giving anything away because anyone who's listening to this and you need to watch this show, but you also, if you haven't seen the first season, watch that.
Speaker 19 And the concept is people working at this company.
Speaker 97 And to go into this company,
Speaker 2 they descend and they're disassociated from...
Speaker 8 their previous life.
Speaker 19 And so their work life and the person who's up above ground, they're the same person, but.
Speaker 11 Yeah, there's just a chip that's inserted into their head and it gets triggered when they go in the elevator down to work that they don't remember who they are on upstairs yeah and they just know their reality at work and then when they leave the chip gets triggered again and they don't remember what happened to work and you see there's a subtle thing you do with the lens when you're going when adam scott's going down the when the the elevator and
Speaker 102 You know, I don't know what it is.
Speaker 19 I don't technically understand it, but something happens where you can see the focal point kind of change just a little bit enough to know that they've gone through a transformation.
Speaker 91 So everyone's severed from
Speaker 24 what's happening to to them at the top of the world.
Speaker 8 And there are so many analogies to that, which is why would these people choose to do that?
Speaker 19 And one of the things, and I might be fishing here, but it very much felt to me like, oh, this is
Speaker 98 like alcohol or drugs, people that something happened in their life.
Speaker 6 They want to disassociate from it.
Speaker 101 And anyone who's had issues with drugs or alcohol knows that there's a reason you're doing that.
Speaker 22 You want to be somebody else because being who you are and feeling that's too painful.
Speaker 101 And it's just really, I mean, there's like 35 different scholars could talk about all the different things that are brought up in one way or another in Severance.
Speaker 11 And that's all Dan Erickson, the creator, the writer, you know, it was the first script that he had produced. It was a spec script he'd sent around.
Speaker 11 And Jackie Cohen at our company, Red Hour, read it and thought it was good.
Speaker 11
And I read it. That's a spec script? That was a spec script, yeah.
That's crazy. It's a good, good to know, right? For aspiring writers.
And
Speaker 11
he had this amazing idea and this amazing facility in terms of how, you know, the tone of his writing. But I agree with you.
There's that analogy.
Speaker 11 You know, just the idea for me also of these people are like coming into work and doing their thing and having their banter and kind of, you know, it's very like kind of, you know, like an office comedy kind of vibe, but they don't know who they are.
Speaker 11
They don't know why they're there and they don't know what they're doing. To me, that's like the life analogy.
Yeah.
Speaker 11 You know, that's where we're all here, you know, and we get settled in and we figure out how to get through and do it, but like we don't ultimately know what it's all about.
Speaker 11 So I thought that was what was always resonating with me.
Speaker 33 The work they're doing is so, I mean, it's really funny.
Speaker 92 The work they're doing on their computer screens is hilariously,
Speaker 73 I mean, it is analogous to how a lot of people feel about their jobs.
Speaker 98 Yeah.
Speaker 22 You know, I'm here moving these numbers around.
Speaker 11 Kind of widgets and widgets.
Speaker 52 I don't, and, and it doesn't make sense.
Speaker 19 When I watch it, it doesn't make sense.
Speaker 55 But when someone does it, they're like, good for you.
Speaker 48 You did it.
Speaker 44 And
Speaker 2 I think many people, many Americans watching it would say,
Speaker 71 that's what it feels like at work.
Speaker 51 My daughter was role-playing going to work the other day. I said, what do you do for work? And she goes, I push buttons.
Speaker 13 Yes.
Speaker 53 She's going to go far that kid.
Speaker 11 Well, Dan worked at a door factory when he came out to LA. And that was where he got the idea because he was just going crazy every day working at this door factory and he wanted to forget about it.
Speaker 105 So he wrote, I mean, to me, it's also, it is a great message for people that there are a lot of people that say, oh, it's all who you know.
Speaker 8 And it's like, no, if you have a really good story to tell and a great idea and you write it, the cream does, the truth does out.
Speaker 98 The cream does rise to the top.
Speaker 19 If you put something out there that's of real quality, it's going to bounce around and someone like you is going to find it.
Speaker 100 Yeah.
Speaker 11 I mean, it's hard. It's hard to get the access for people, you know, to get that script in someone's hands.
Speaker 11 But I feel like in this business, everybody's always looking for that next thing, you know, always looking for talent, looking for something that they're going to read and is going to excite them and
Speaker 11 feel, you know, feel new and different. And that's just always going to be.
Speaker 89 Also, this cast you have.
Speaker 19 I mean, I mentioned Adam Scott and Britt Lauer
Speaker 92 is amazing and incredible in it.
Speaker 98 But also you've got John Tuturo.
Speaker 19 You've got Christopher Walkin.
Speaker 8 I mean, you've, you've got there, there's something really fascinating about this show, which is that people naturally, when they work together, want to create community.
Speaker 52 And there's something happening here at Lumen where they kind of really don't want people talking, they don't want people getting too close to each other.
Speaker 19 And that's another mystery. And I know, I think the reward of a show like this is that you get really smart fans online, and there are so many of them that are all arguing about what does this mean.
Speaker 22 And Eduardo, when I came in,
Speaker 83 Eduardo was no, but but no Eduardo
Speaker 70 you said you said you don't fuck don't fuck this up
Speaker 77 this is severance man don't fuck this up and I'm like well Ben Stiller has been around a long time and we could shoot the shit about a lot of things and I do intend to spend a half the time talking about severance you're like you don't fuck it up by the way Eduardo I totally get
Speaker 53 I know Conan a lot he's seen me fuck up a lot of stuff but I read that I read an interview with Patricia Arquette who's amazing in the show and she has this quote about you as a director.
Speaker 95 It was just about your tenacity,
Speaker 89 how hard you work,
Speaker 8 how important it is to you that
Speaker 8 you get it right. It was just, it was really lovely.
Speaker 11
Yeah. Oh, that's nice.
Well, she's amazing. I mean, yeah, you know, I think we're all going through life and try.
Speaker 11 I feel like a kinship, seriously, Conan, because I know how hard you work and how much it means to you, but you're also trying to figure out the work-life balance, which is part of the show, too.
Speaker 11 And
Speaker 11 that's important too.
Speaker 11 And I hope over the years, over the, I don't know, last whatever, you know, 20, 30 years, that I like, I've figured out that a little bit more because you have to, there's a point where you work, work it and work and work it, but then you also have to like also then be able to step back and go, okay, I can only control so much.
Speaker 11 Yes. Yeah.
Speaker 60 I haven't gotten to that point yet.
Speaker 84 But I've heard tell you can only control so much.
Speaker 11 I've learned the hard way, you know?
Speaker 22 Well, but I will say on a personal note, like when you walk in the door, you seem happy.
Speaker 80 Yeah.
Speaker 6 And I know that you're someone who one of the, maybe the subtitle of this podcast could be, sometimes I want it to be, be careful who you envy.
Speaker 19 Like, I want to talk to people and let everyone know everyone's got shit.
Speaker 102 Everyone has got things that they're dealing with.
Speaker 97 And predominantly, I get to talk to people like yourself who are very talented
Speaker 2 and have done this amazing work.
Speaker 19 And you're trying to figure out most of the things that everyone else is trying to figure out.
Speaker 57 So when you walked in after all these years to see that you look great, you you seem happy,
Speaker 101 this is incredible work you're doing.
Speaker 8 And I love that you're able to say to yourself, yeah, I can go back and be in something again.
Speaker 22 I think you're going to go back and maybe do a cameo and I'm doing happy guilt.
Speaker 11 I've got this little movie I did with David Gordon Green called Nutcrackers that's on Hulu and that we did like super low budget and was really fun.
Speaker 12 Yeah.
Speaker 33 I mean, like you can dip into that when you want, but you can enjoy this and also enjoy your life.
Speaker 43 Yes.
Speaker 11 Well, that's that's the big part of it, enjoying your life.
Speaker 39 I mean, and that's that's and you and I are talking about it as if we don't know what that is.
Speaker 44 I know, exactly.
Speaker 81 We've heard tell of this life thing.
Speaker 55 My agent tells me my children are thriving.
Speaker 81 You guys are severed.
Speaker 52 Yeah, we are severed.
Speaker 39 We don't know what's happening.
Speaker 43 I don't, I think I'm told I have kids.
Speaker 33 I have to go up in the elevator.
Speaker 11 No, you know, it's, you know, I have my, your kids are, are older too.
Speaker 11 I mean, my, my daughter's 22, my son's 19, and they will tell you, they'll give you feedback on how you're doing, you know, and I appreciate it.
Speaker 11 And we've actually, like working on the documentary, I interviewed both my kids and Christine.
Speaker 11 And, you know, we talked about stuff that's worked in our lives and stuff that hasn't worked in our lives.
Speaker 11 And my kids were very honest with me, you know, about times when my work was, I put my work in front of the family. Yeah.
Speaker 11 And I'm very grateful that I'm in a place now where I still like have these relationships with them that we can work on and talk about that stuff and, you know, and adjust because
Speaker 11 it's true, you know, it's cliche, but it's true, but like at the end of the day, that's what it's all really about.
Speaker 11 My joy comes from working and being creative, being creative, but sharing that with my family.
Speaker 11
And like, if you like going home and not having anybody to share that with, I've had that because Christine and I were separated for a few years. That's right.
And, you know, there's,
Speaker 29 if that's the right thing for people, sometimes that's the right thing.
Speaker 11 But, you know, for me, having, being together with her and our family being together, I'm so much more appreciative of it.
Speaker 43 So I feel really grateful.
Speaker 100 Well, I am delighted for you. I'm really delighted.
Speaker 11 I figured it all out. I have no problems.
Speaker 36 And
Speaker 44 why are you crying?
Speaker 53 You're crying as you say it, and it's tears of blood.
Speaker 38 It's just fucking weird.
Speaker 25 I've just figured it all out.
Speaker 33 Ben, just an
Speaker 27 absolute joy to see you again.
Speaker 100 And
Speaker 100 I'm so delighted for you. I really am.
Speaker 63 I'm genuinely.
Speaker 2 And I have a very just nice, funny little memory of I lived predominantly on the Upper West Side for years, all those years I was doing late night.
Speaker 97 And for some reason, I would always run into your mom on the upper west side.
Speaker 95 And she was so lovely to me and such a, and such a real person on the upper west side.
Speaker 6 You know, such an upper west side.
Speaker 11 And a fan of yours. She loves you.
Speaker 2 Oh, she was absolutely, you know, we Catholics have to stick up for each other.
Speaker 11 By the way, I just have to say also, there is one scene at the end of the last episode of season two of Severance that I'm really looking forward to you seeing.
Speaker 74 Oh,
Speaker 54 because I feel like you of all people.
Speaker 12 I will text you.
Speaker 11
Yeah, no, I will appreciate this little scene. Okay.
And it might even seem to others who watch it maybe weird or indulgent, but I feel like it's like made for you.
Speaker 53 If it's weird and indulgent,
Speaker 53 if it's weird and indulgent, I'm going to love it.
Speaker 12 All right, good.
Speaker 48 That's what you are. Weird and indulgent.
Speaker 44 Okay.
Speaker 66 I think I spelled it out enough.
Speaker 44 Yeah.
Speaker 49 Hey, Ben, thank you so much.
Speaker 19 And congrats on Severin. Great to see you.
Speaker 44 Thanks, man.
Speaker 26 Paramount Plus has so many movies.
Speaker 23 Paramount Plus has the movies you've watched so many times you can quote them. Iconic movies your friends can't believe you haven't seen.
Speaker 72 Dude, you didn't see that?
Speaker 81 I can't believe it.
Speaker 1 And the latest movies you'll need to talk about with your friends or co-hosts. I just saw that movie.
Speaker 61 I got to discuss it with others.
Speaker 56 With Paramount Plus, you can watch the latest blockbusters, re-watch your favorite movements, or see how the reboot measures up to the original.
Speaker 37 Whether you're into Top Gun or the Naked Gun, Mean Girls or Mission, Impossible, Smurfs or Sonic the Hedgehog, Paramount Plus has it all, and I say all.
Speaker 38 There's a mountain of movies to discover on Paramount Plus.
Speaker 23 Start streaming today.
Speaker 3 I'm sure a lot of you out there are plain Coca-Cola people, and that's respectable.
Speaker 33 Trust me, I'm one.
Speaker 3 Yes, I am one.
Speaker 27 You've many times seen me just, I like to order just a regular Coca-Cola.
Speaker 37 You really do.
Speaker 18 I really do.
Speaker 65 But if you haven't tried a Coca-Cola from Sonic, now is your chance because right now it's completely free with any purchase.
Speaker 2 Now, if you're a regular Joe, you're thinking to yourself, I can get a Coca-Cola from anywhere, Conan.
Speaker 95 Why would I go to Sonic?
Speaker 18 Well, I'm going to tell you.
Speaker 2 Sonic has all the flavors and add-ins to make the perfect Coca-Cola for you.
Speaker 59 I'm talking strawberry, cherries, coconut, sweet cream, jalapenos?
Speaker 13 Oh.
Speaker 1 Second of all, let me say this again.
Speaker 34 It's free.
Speaker 65 But I like an add-in.
Speaker 40 I like to have a little flavor.
Speaker 3 And you know what?
Speaker 40 Coconut in your Coca-Cola is delicious.
Speaker 8 It really is.
Speaker 2 So create a Coke your way, any size, any flavor, free with any purchase in the Sonic app for a limited time.
Speaker 59 Live free.
Speaker 95 Eat Sonic.
Speaker 51
Okay, we found that something very interesting happened with a fan of yours. And more specifically, some merchandise from this podcast.
Okay. And this comes from Instagram.
Speaker 51
We're going to take a listen to it or watch it if you're watching this on YouTube. Okay.
Let's take a look.
Speaker 106 I fought a burglar for wearing my Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend t-shirt. There was a man in my house, and I told him, you know, this is my house, get out.
Speaker 106
Then I saw he was wearing my Conan O'Brien's t-shirt. I ordered him to take it off.
He did not.
Speaker 106
And so I did a stupid thing and I went up to him, I pushed him a little bit, and yanked the shirt right off of him. You might be thinking, Yeah, that is stupid.
Why would you react that way?
Speaker 106 It's just a shirt, and I think it's partially because what that shirt represented to me at that time. All the comedians I had watched, I told them they
Speaker 106
saved me when I saw him wearing a shirt that represented why I like living. I love laughing.
I love comedy. I love all of that.
Speaker 106 All the friends that I've made.
Speaker 106 I snap.
Speaker 107 Oh my god, happiest day of my life. I did meet him best day of 2024.
Speaker 107 He still doesn't know the story because he just signed my shirt, took this picture, and left. It was like midnight.
Speaker 51 So this comes to us from an Instagram user named True Travels of Hope. My first thought is that were you the burglar just trying to get the shirt?
Speaker 19 Yes, I do try to reuse merchandise as much as possible because we know where our merchandise is sent.
Speaker 40 And so I try to go there.
Speaker 2 So I'm often in my downtime patrolling the Midwest,
Speaker 19 the southern states, the southwest, and the Pacific Northwest, looking for people wearing Conan merchant.
Speaker 61 And I just try to reclaim it as best I can so we can sell it a second time.
Speaker 81 That's what it was.
Speaker 27 And I do sometimes take other stuff when I'm in the houses.
Speaker 44 Might as well.
Speaker 51 I noticed because she's wearing one of those shirts for the podcast that say, I feel blank about being Conan O'Brien's friend.
Speaker 51 And there's a spot where you can literally fill it in with a marker and she has not done that.
Speaker 6 She's still not sure how she feels.
Speaker 72 Well, what do we think of this story?
Speaker 67 First of all, I really wish she wouldn't have confronted this robber.
Speaker 26 Yes, I'm going to say that too.
Speaker 29 I think, and I want to say this to all my fans, if someone, and first of all, let me start by saying to this woman, True Travels of Hope.
Speaker 5 I want to say to True Travels of Hope that I very much appreciate that you're a loyal fan and that our nonsense has meant something to you.
Speaker 2 And so this comes from the bottom of my heart.
Speaker 22 Our merchandise is not worth risking your life for.
Speaker 61 This is very shoddy material.
Speaker 75 It's often repurposed.
Speaker 51 Some of it might be toxic and endangering you.
Speaker 12 Exactly, yeah.
Speaker 27 That's an old Friday Night Light shirt
Speaker 93 that we yeah that we spray painted over um using a really an out-of-date spray paint uh so no do not risk your life do not approach a burglar if if anyone approaches you and says um you know give me that conan o'brian merch uh just give it up just give it up it's funny you should say that she shouldn't approach him because i feel like the first thing that you i would absolutely approach him not for a conan o'brien shirt not for no but like but if someone was wearing like your share shirt oh if someone was in my house and like, first of all, he just put a shirt on?
Speaker 13 I know.
Speaker 81 Also, here's another thing.
Speaker 87 She said she ripped it off like he's a stripper.
Speaker 75 Like it's a tearaway shirt.
Speaker 51 I think the shirts are so threadbare and cheap that you can just rip them off.
Speaker 19 Or most Conan, most people that own Conan merch are so, and I'm speak about myself in the third person, so love Conan.
Speaker 52 that they rarely take it off and it becomes threadbare more quickly, hence easily to tear.
Speaker 84 So I think that's a possibility.
Speaker 42 I don't know.
Speaker 41 I don't think people
Speaker 59 should be risking their lives for Conan merch.
Speaker 4 No.
Speaker 63 Especially the mugs.
Speaker 27 I mean, the mugs often explode.
Speaker 44 That's been proven.
Speaker 86 Mugs could be good weapons.
Speaker 90 Yeah.
Speaker 7 No, not our mugs.
Speaker 19 They just turn to powder the minute you hit someone.
Speaker 66 But it's nice.
Speaker 87 She did say we met, but she doesn't say where we met.
Speaker 23 She said it was midnight, and I can't tell from the picture where we were.
Speaker 29 So maybe it's when I broke back into the house to get the shirt back after my initial failed attention.
Speaker 67 It would have been really funny if you were just like an absolute dick to her.
Speaker 82 If you were just like, oh, I don't like taking pictures.
Speaker 45 But that's the obvious
Speaker 45 fans.
Speaker 51 He broke back into the house so he could get a selfie.
Speaker 54 And so he could realize I'm the guy that asks people, would you like a selfie?
Speaker 56 Yes.
Speaker 53 When often they don't even have a phone.
Speaker 51 Like the nearest sirens are down the street and he breaks back in going, I haven't signed your shirt yet.
Speaker 5 Would you like me to sign it?
Speaker 42 That would be more likely.
Speaker 18 Yeah.
Speaker 42 But, well,
Speaker 29 I'm glad she got her shirt back.
Speaker 16 I'm glad she's okay.
Speaker 53 I'm glad she's okay.
Speaker 19 But I do think we should take a lesson away from this that, you know, look, if it's Marvel merchandise, yes, fight for your life to get it back.
Speaker 18 That's the weird thing.
Speaker 51 What's the motivation of the burglar?
Speaker 11 What this is what they decide to take?
Speaker 29 You know? Well, first of all, okay, now you're being a dick.
Speaker 81 Well, I'm on this podcast.
Speaker 67
What I used to steal. Yes.
I used to just be like, can I do it?
Speaker 80 Oh.
Speaker 67 And so it wasn't about what I was stealing. It was about could like, and also I got very arrogant.
Speaker 67 Like I would wear a bracelet in a store and I'd just be like, I'm going to walk out wearing the bracelet.
Speaker 5 I remember once Sona, Sona and I were in Worcester, Massachusetts, and there is an armory there.
Speaker 18 And there's an armor museum, a museum of like Flemish, British, French armor from 18th and 19th century.
Speaker 2 And we were in there, and this is during Sona's, let me see if I can get away with this phase.
Speaker 63 Sona walked out wearing a full suit of armor.
Speaker 63 Eee oh, eee oh, eee oh, ee oh, eee oh.
Speaker 67 If you actually
Speaker 67 were wearing it in, it would just be like, oh, she's just leaving in the outfit.
Speaker 77 It was from 1622.
Speaker 66 And it had all this fancy filigree on it.
Speaker 1 And so the guy said, excuse me, miss, I think you're in.
Speaker 34 She was like, what?
Speaker 81 What?
Speaker 70 I was wearing this on the way in.
Speaker 25 You're racist.
Speaker 71 Oh, my God.
Speaker 75 Remember when you said you're racist?
Speaker 48 No.
Speaker 76 And you had the visor down, so he didn't even know,
Speaker 52 right? He didn't know who you were.
Speaker 67 Right?
Speaker 67
Look, I liked just like showing, hey, I just took it. Yeah.
And it's, you know, most of the time, if you walk out confidently, people are just going to be like, oh, wait, it belongs to the morning.
Speaker 13 Armor
Speaker 58 that you stole.
Speaker 41 from Worcester, Massachusetts, and you should give it back.
Speaker 67 That was such a build-up to what you were going to say. There was so much just information.
Speaker 55 Well, listen.
Speaker 13 Always.
Speaker 67 What new gym did we go to?
Speaker 50 There's a,
Speaker 1 Can you look up the, what's this, the Museum of Armor?
Speaker 16 We're fact-checking this?
Speaker 37 Yes.
Speaker 12 This fake story? What is happening?
Speaker 38 It really happened. It really happened.
Speaker 72 Worcester, Massachusetts, Museum of Armor.
Speaker 56 Come on.
Speaker 25 What do you mean I'm working on it, old man?
Speaker 44 You have a headband.
Speaker 48 Higgins Armory. Yes!
Speaker 25 Higgins Armory.
Speaker 33 It was the one thing when I would go visit my cousins, every time. My aunt would say, it would be raining out.
Speaker 45 We'd be like, we got nothing to do.
Speaker 81 And what is there to do in Worcester?
Speaker 78 And she'd say, go to the Museum Museum of Armor.
Speaker 75 Oh, my God.
Speaker 83 And so we'd drive over to the Higgins Museum of Armor.
Speaker 76 And there was no attempt to make it look interesting, just literally a giant warehouse.
Speaker 57 And someone had lots of suits of armor that they just laid out.
Speaker 33 They didn't even put mannequins in them.
Speaker 67 I feel like you would enjoy that, though. Did you act like you weren't excited because you didn't want your cousins to think you were
Speaker 33 greatest days of my life?
Speaker 19 Boy, did this little orange-haired boy love a suit of armor?
Speaker 48 Oh, look, it's Dutch.
Speaker 13
Hey, Luke. Hey, Neil.
I found one that's Dutch.
Speaker 79 And then the beatings commenced.
Speaker 53 Anyway, take care, fans.
Speaker 52 Don't stop crime.
Speaker 44 And visit the Higgins Armor Museum in Worcester, Massachusetts.
Speaker 51
Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend with Conan O'Brien, Sonam of Session, and Matt Gorley. Produced by me, Matt Gorley.
Executive produced by Adam Sachs, Jeff Frost, and Nick Liao.
Speaker 51 Theme song by The White Stripes. Incidental music by Jimmy Vivino.
Speaker 62 Take it away, Jimmy.
Speaker 51 Our supervising producer is Aaron Blair, and our associate talent producer is Jennifer Samples. Engineering and Mixing by Eduardo Perez and Brendan Burns.
Speaker 51 Additional production support by Mars Melnick. Talent booking by Paula Davis, Gina Batista, and Britt Kahn.
Speaker 51 You can rate and review this show on Apple Podcasts, and you might find your review read on a future episode. Got a question for Conan? Call the Team Cocoa Hotline at 669-587-2847 and leave a message.
Speaker 51 It too could be featured on a future episode. You can also get three free months of SiriusXM when you sign up at seriousxm.com/slash Conan.
Speaker 51 And if you haven't already, please subscribe to Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend wherever fine podcasts are downloaded.
Speaker 51 Hey, Fidelity!
Speaker 108 What's it cost to invest with the Fidelity app?
Speaker 108
Start with as little as $1 with no account fees or trade commissions on U.S. stocks and ETFs.
Hmm. That's music to my ears.
I can only talk.
Speaker 62
Investing involves risk, including risk of loss. Zero account fees apply to retail brokerage accounts only.
Sell order assessment fee not included.
Speaker 85 A limited number of ETFs are subject to a a transaction-based service fee of $100.
Speaker 62 See full list at Fidelity.com/slash commissions. Fidelity Brokerage Services LLC member NYSC SIPC.
Speaker 104 Now's the time to start your next adventure behind the wheel of an exciting new Toyota hybrid.
Speaker 109 With the largest lineup of hybrid, plug-in, hybrid, and electrified vehicles to choose from, Toyota has the one for you.
Speaker 104 Every new Toyota hybrid comes with Toyota Care, two-year complementary scheduled maintenance, an exclusive hybrid battery warranty, and Toyota's legendary quality and reliability.
Speaker 104
Visit your local Toyota dealer today, Toyota. Let's go places.
See your local Toyota dealer for hybrid battery warranty details.