One Ring To Rule Them All

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Conan O'Brien needs a fan. Want to talk to Conan? Visit TeamCoco.com slash Call Conan.

Okay, let's get started. Hi Raheel.
Welcome to Conan O'Brien needs a fan. Hey.
Hey, Raheel. How are you? I'm doing amazing.
So excited to meet you guys. Yeah.
How are you? First of all, where are you contacting us from? So I'm down in Miami. Oh, okay.
Other side of the U.S., yeah. Very nice.
And tell us a little bit about yourself, Raheel. Yeah.
So I'm currently in my fellowship. So I finished med school and I did my training.
I'm still currently in my training and I'm doing gastroenterology and hepatology. Oh, good Lord.
That's impressive. You're a gastroenterologist.
And what was the other field too? And hepatology. So they go kind of hand in hand.
Hepatology is blood? Liver. Ooh.
Ooh. Sorry.
So liver connected to intestine. Yes.
Intestinal tract. That all makes sense.
Okay. Yeah.
And we'll clean that up. What do you want me to do? What? Who's going to clean it up? Girls? I'm going to clean it.
Edit it. He's going to edit it? Yeah.
just so i know what hepatology is you know anyway so um you'll do as you're told okay i'm sorry we can just reconfigure it so that so we're here how are you actually blood i'm doing great it's great to meet you guys now i've always heard hepatology is uh the study of the liver. Is that correct? Yeah.
I actually learned that from your podcast. Thank you.
That's, you know, I never make mistakes when it comes to medicine because I, too, am well-trained. Well, first of all, congratulations.
You're a young man and you're seems like you're very well-educated and that's very cool. And you've you're going to help a lot of people.
Tell us a little bit about your training. What are you interested? Well, first of all, have you worked with a lot of patients so far? Has it all been textbook stuff? Yeah, no.
So I've done so, you know, our med school is four years after our undergrad. And then we do three years of internal medicine, which is all, you know, patient facing based, long days, long hours.
And then GI hepatology is another three years after that. So I'm about halfway through right now.
So it's been about four and a half, five years of seeing patients. It's such a dedication it takes in the field of medicine.
there is no preparation for being in comedy.

There's no,

it's,

I am ashamed.

I'm ashamed that you just get to dive in and be an ass and,

and whatever,

start getting to practice immediately.

I'm so impressed by the fact that you've had,

you've spent years and years and years of your life preparing.

And I'm glad you have,

because I'm sure you're going to be very good at what you do. You're going to help save a lot of lives.
That's the hope. I mean, you know, even this many years in it every day, it feels like I'm still trying to figure out what's going on with everybody.
So it's one of those things where learning never stops. You kind of keep going at it.
New things, new experiences, new patient interactions. It all makes it worth it.
Okay. I've talked about this a lot, but can you hook me up with Profafol? Oh, geez.
Oh, geez. Come on.
Because when I've had colonoscopies, they give me this drug Profafol, and I've talked about it before, but it's the happiest I've been in my entire life. It's an absolutely amazing feeling, and it's miraculous.
And so if you can become my secret illegal supplier of Profofol,

I don't see how anyone traces it back to us. I don't see one way that it leaks out and it's tracked back to us.
That's just what I'm saying. By the way, I'm terrible at committing crimes.
Have you performed any colonoscopies? Is that something that they've trained you to do? Yeah, Yeah. So we kind of get into it from day one from our training.
So, you know, our first year we're fumbling around trying to figure out what we're doing. It's a new technical skill and it's, you know, not necessarily intuitive when you get started.
And then, you know, over the first year, you really get your confidence. And then second year, you really start to build your skill, build your efficiency.
Can I just say, I hate to interrupt, but Raheel, doesn't that kind of suck for the patient? If you're saying like, yeah, you know, first year, you're just jamming a camera in there. You don't know what you're doing.
It's banging up against stuff and you just have to kind of force it. Isn't that, I mean, you don't want to be, I don't want to encounter you at that stage, Raheel, as a patient.
Is that fair to say? You do with propofol. It's that magic stuff that- You're right.
Okay, so I wake up and I don't know what's happened. Exactly.
You ask, after they wake up, they ask, are we getting started? And that's the magic of propofol. Even though you've been banging around in there for three hours.
Oh my God. What do they say banging around in there? Just moving furniture.
Come on. Do you think you're pretty good at it now? I would like to think so.
You know, my attendings might say otherwise behind closed doors, but at least to my face, I say I'm doing a wall. Good.
Good. I would think when is the I would think the technology is going to improve to the point where you just swallow like a little pill or something and it works its way through your system really quickly and the pill comes out the other side and said everything is fine colon they have one do they they have one of those for the small bowel uh for like the small intestine but the colon is just so uh wide and distended it can't really take pictures of the whole thing and thankfully i hope it doesn't because then i'll be out of a job see that's the problem is technology replaces a lot of i mean i'll be replaced by ai in about a year yeah they'll have a fake conan here less than a year okay that's good to know just let me give me a heads up ratings might go up all right that's nice that's nice let's turn up the let's turn up the knob on the comedy portion of the conan hey it's working um uh well i think that's i think that's fantastic now what about you what is it does looking at people's intestines has it in is it at all adjusted or informed the way that you eat or the way that you treat your body when you look at other people's intestines? No.
And it's like, it's always a running joke. Whenever you see GI fellows, you can always like tell who they are in the hospital because they're literally just running to the cafeteria, stuffing whatever the food they can in their mouth between procedures and then running back to the procedure room.
The field and the, you know, the practice is just so fast paced and we're just running to see patients, running to do procedures.

I like literally when I tell patients and counsel them in clinic, I just basically say everything I don't do in my life.

And oh, my God, that's fascinating to me.

So you're telling them, well, it's really good to, you know, eat a lot of roughage and don't eat processed foods. And it's really good to avoid.
And then you don't listen to it at all.

I'll be stuffing a pizza in my mouth as I'm telling them that. Okay, all right.
Are you pretty healthy? Are you a healthy eater? Other than when you're at work, when you're not, let's say you're not at work. Are you fairly healthy about your diet? I'd like, I try to be.
I'm vegetarian, you know, as just religiously. So that kind of lends itself to eating more like, you know, lentils and vegetables and getting your your greens in.
Right. Yeah.
I'm not a big lentil guy. I'm going to tell you right now.
You know what? I don't like me either. I mean, I don't think I've ever said, hey, I need me some lentils.
Yeah. You know, or when I'm in a restaurant, it's not the first thing I ask the waiter.

Hey, you got lentils?

No.

What's the lentil situation?

Let's run down the list of the lentils.

What's the lentil of the day?

Exactly.

I want to see the lentil sommelier

come out and taste the lentil.

So do you fast ever?

I do.

Because that's a big thing now.

People believe that fasting, and I would like your opinion on this because I know people that fast and they say it's good for them. And now there's a lot of science that's saying fasting is good.
But I always wonder, is it one of those things where 10 years from now, they're going to tell us, actually, it's terrible for you. We changed our minds, you know? I think, well, so I think the, I don't know, this is just what I've seen off of Instagram probably, but.
Oh, good. You're a doctor, are you not? Hi, doctor.
Can you tell us what you're seeing on Instagram? Can I have some of that pizza? Hello, doctor. Tell me what's on TikTok.
Go ahead. Sorry.
Go ahead. Go ahead.
No, I was going to say, I feel like i've seen some people or some some some uh some other experts kind of saying that the the data around intermittent fasting isn't all that it was cracked up to be earlier um so you know but you know as far as fasting um i do not necessarily for the health benefits but i did uh just in terms of religion. Oh, okay.
Can you tell me specifically what your religion is? Yeah. So my religion is called Jainism.
So practitioners are called Jain. And so we have kind of, you know, there's similar things in other cultures.
There's like Ramadan for people who follow Islam. There's like Lent and things like that.
But in Jainismainism we have this eight day eight or ten day religious festival called baruchin and during that time we can do different days of fasting you know some people will do just the last day um and then you know kind of as much as you can so i've done eight day fasts basically no food eight day fast Yeah, no food for eight days. No food of any kind, or can you take some sustenance?

Just boiled water when there's daylight out. And this kind of stretches back to the start of the religion and the different pre-technology ages and stuff like that.
But yeah, just water for eight days. Okay, I have questions.
As a doctor, do you think that that's okay to go eight days without any food other than water? I don't. This was all pre-med school.
Gotcha. This was like me in undergrad, me in med school.
Okay. I don't think it's the healthiest.
I don't think it's the healthiest thing to do. I do think it's a really interesting test of determination, interesting test of self will.
And you can really push your body to the limit in a way that, you know, outside of thinking medical, but you can really see what your body is capable of in those eight days. Are you even able to get out of bed on the eighth day? Are you debilitated? Yeah, no, you can live life as is.
You know, one, the first time I did it, I was an undergrad. The second time I was in med school and you live life as is, you know, the first couple of days are the hardest where you're, you know, I feel like if it's 11 o'clock and I'm like, it's lunchtime, your body's just so used to it.
And then

after like day one, day two, your body kind of adjusts to that feeling of I'm not eating. And so let me occupy myself with other stuff.
And then the rest of the week, honestly, just kind of, you just don't feel that sensation of hunger as much. You know why? That's because your body is eating itself on On day seven, hey, I don't feel so bad.
Yeah, you just ate your heart. Your body's like, I'm good.
Yeah, liver's gone, heart's gone. Now I'm working on the third rib.
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Hey, Sona. Pretty recently I got together with a bunch of my chums.
Yeah. Guys I went to college with.
We all played football together. And don't laugh at that.
That's real. Sorry.
Yeah. It was one of those little table games of football.
It's actually a video game. It's simulated football.
And it was the 80s, so it wasn't a very good game. Anyway, it was a good time.
We got together. We had a good time.
It's really nice to get together with people. And I got to say, from game nights to parties with friends or special anniversaries, celebrating important occasions means more moments with the coolest people in your life.
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I mean, it's all, it's all, it's fascinating to me because clearly there is a large religious component in many religions. There's a big religious component to denying yourself food, fasting, going without and people feeling like they reach a higher plane or that they feel that they've gained something by seeing what they could do by denying themselves.
So there's clearly some kind of link here. It's just we don't know, obviously, completely what the science is.
And maybe it's different for all kinds of people. I don't know.
Yeah. No, I mean, just going through the experience, it really showed what the body is capable of.
Was it the health testing? I doubt it. But it was an experience.
And how do you break after eight days? Yeah. What do you is that? Is it do you do you get a, you know, like a nine tiered hamburger? What do you get? I mean, I know you're a vegetarian.
I'm just thinking about what I would do. I would I would try to go to In-N-Out and say, can you make a hamburger that has nine patties that structurally sound? That's like a deck of cards.
Yeah. I want a card dealer in here.
A really good one to shuffle the patties and make a nine tiered sandwich. And then I want my jaw unlocked so I can eat it in one bite.
What is your, what is, what do you, when you, when you would break fast, what would you eat? So you actually have to go very slow because you basically have to re-wake your bowel.

And you're not going to like this,

but it's not even lentils, but it's like lentil water.

So like the water that you cook your lentils in.

I'm a big fan of lentil water.

Don't get me wrong.

I'm a foe of the lentil.

That is my lifelong foe is the lentil, but lentil water and I are best chums. Yeah, it's just that and like sugar water.
And you just try to wake your, you know, wake your GI system back up and then you slowly, slowly advance diet. Right, right.
Do you have a question for Conan, Rahel? I do. and it's like a life dilemma that I'd love to get some

inspiration diet right right do you have a question for conan raheel i do um and it's like a you know a life dilemma that i'd love to get some insight of yours um so i am planning on proposing to my girlfriend and um so you know i'm about to start the whole ring shopping um thing and her parents happen to be jewelers. And so I'd like to know how you would kind of navigate the clear conflict of interest when I have no negotiating power on my side.
Okay. It's your question is you don't want to purchase the ring from the parents.
Is that it? I do. But how would I get the best deal or negotiate my way when I have no power on my side? Can you haggle with your future in-laws? Are you assuming they're not going to give you the best deal that they might be trying to make a profit off? Do you get along with your girlfriend's parents? No, I do.
I do. They're lovely.
They're lovely. Okay, so my guess is they're going to give you a good deal.
But that's the assumption that, you know, that's. He can't go anywhere else.
He can't go to another jeweler. So they're just going to be like, oh, he's going to pay whatever we tell him to pay.
I would. I mean, first of all, I don't know these people.
I don't know who they are. You tell me they're nice people.
I'm questioning whether you have to buy the ring from them. You have to.
Well, you could say, Raheel, that it's important for you that the ring you give your future wife have passed through your body. Oh, that's not what I thought.
I said, I just want to be an independent man. No, no.
And you, it's important to you that A, you buy the ring and then it pass through your GI tract. Okay.
Because that's such an important part of your life. And they're not going to want to sell you one of their rings once they hear that.
It's a symbolism of... It's a symbol of your...
It's a symbol of what you do, your profession, what you're giving your life to, but also you are willing to process this ring in every way that a human can process something. And, and then they're going to not want to sell you a ring at that point.
No, because there's a good chance it'll get stuck in there like a sunflower seed. It's not.
What? Raheel, you'll buy, you'll buy a ring that will pass easily through the, the lower bowel, will you not? It'll get stuck. Yeah, at my current fellow salary, I don't think I can afford anything that's going to get stuck.
Yeah. Yeah.
And you can also encase it in a prune or something that's going to go through pretty quick. Come on, don't eat the ring.
Don't eat the ring. Oh, you're telling me that what I'm telling him is stupid? How is it stupid that he buy a ring, stick it in a prune, eat it, pass it through his body, clean it off and give it to his wife and bypass his her parents who are jewelers? I don't see one problem with that plan.
Raheel, what do you think? I could get behind most of it. Well, listen, in all seriousness, I think you buy the ring from them.
Are they going to be able to keep their mouths shut because you do want it to be a surprise when you give her the ring i know and so i don't know if i can tell her whenever this podcast comes out if she can listen to it or if i'm just gonna cut it halfway well she's an intelligent woman i'm assuming she's not listening so i think you're okay okay. Do you think her parents are going to have a lot of input

on what the ring is?

Or do you get to choose that freely?

We've kind of talked about it.

And they've told me what her preferences are.

Oh, for God's sake.

She already knows.

What preferences are her most expensive item.

I think they can keep a secret.

So I'm hoping.

But do they know what she wants?

Because you keep talking about what, you know,

Eduardo brings up a good point,

which is they know what their preferences are,

but what's her preference?

No, they've said, you know,

they're a family of jewelers, a couple generations.

So jewelry is very ingrained.

I think they've always talked about that kind of stuff,

like go for the dinner table, probably.

And so they definitely know her preferences. And I think they definitely guide me the right way they're they're sweet people and this is obviously said you know with a touch of jest but yeah um well i think uh i think it's all going to go swimmingly i just want to make sure that it's a nice surprise you know that that uh when you pull that ring out of yourself that my god that it's a surprise he's pulling it out of his body if he times it right if he times it right he could say he's got to rinse it first you can't just you have the water running squat squat

squat

no to rinse it first. You can't just pull it out.
You have the water running. Get over here now! Get over here now! Get over here now! Squat? He's gonna squat down.
No, come on. Your fiancé can never listen to this.
You can fire it across the room. Oh my god! It's like a carnival game? Yeah.
Stick your finger out, honey. No! Here she comes! Boing, boing, boing, boing.
Your parents helped me pick it out. Your parents picked it out a week ago.
And then I ate it with a lot of corn. Now listen.
I'm sorry. Raheel.
Come on. Come on.
Raheel, I'm looking right now at a transcript of this entire conversation, and I see that I've made no missteps whatsoever. Everything I've said is rational and should be done.
So congratulations. No, Raheel, you are a impressive young man.
I think you're going to have a great career. I wish you the best with this proposal.
I think it's all going to go swimmingly. And I hope I bump into you in person someday because I like you.
You're a fine fellow. Think really seriously about swallowing the ring.
Just think about it. It's a good idea.
Probably get on. Thank you guys so much.
It was so great meeting you guys. All right.
Take care, man. See you later.
Conan O'Brien needs a fan with Conan O'Brien, Sonam Obsessian, and Matt Gourleyley produced by me, Matt Gourley executive produced by Adam Sachs, Jeff Ross, and Nick Liao incidental music by Jimmy Vivino. Take it away, Jimmy.
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I just always win because I just throw the board over, flip it over, and say, get out of my house. Okay, that's mature.
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