Elle Fanning Returns

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Speaker 2 Hi, my name is Elle Fanning, and I feel

Speaker 2 ecstatic about being Conan O'Brien's friend.

Speaker 1 I'll take it.

Speaker 1 Fall is here, hear the yell. Back to school, ring the bell, brand new shoes, walk in blues, climb the fence, books and pens.

Speaker 1 I can tell that we are gonna be friends.

Speaker 1 Yes, I can tell that we are gonna be friends

Speaker 1 hey there and welcome to conan o'brien needs a friend joined as always by uh sonoma session hello and just put a little pep into it next time and uh matt gorley how are you hi how are you i'm good hey i i want to bring up something that was a direct quote from you just now okay you just said in this room when i see a hallmark movie i watch it i did we weren't on mic i didn't know that that would come back to haunt me well yes so you're are you're prepared to admit that and you're good I am, I will not only admit it, I will encourage others to do it as well.

Speaker 1 And I'll say, many people say that our nation is divided,

Speaker 1 that

Speaker 1 we've lost our way. I think nothing would unify this country more than everybody watching Hallmark movies.
I just enjoy the pattern.

Speaker 1 You know, you could say that there are certain tenets of drama that were set up by the Greeks and it's never really changed since then.

Speaker 1 I love that Hallmark has a certain formula, they follow it every single time with chilling regularity.

Speaker 1 And they've also come up with something that I think is revolutionary. When we think of story, we think of conflict.
Conflict is the center of story, right? It's the what is the conflict?

Speaker 1 What is the problem? Any scene, someone comes into a room, there's a problem here. How does the person get the thing that the other person's trying to keep them from getting?

Speaker 1 That's how all good drama story works. Hallmark, I've watched these things.
There's hardly ever a conflict. They're conflict-free, yet they exist.
They're extremely popular. And it somehow works.

Speaker 1 But attractive single person meets other attractive single person.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Oh, they one lives in Los Angeles and the other lives up in the mountains of Utah, but in a fairly affluent community.

Speaker 1 And they can get to each other within a 40-minute flight or something, hour and 40-minute flight. And there isn't really, they meet each other.
She always immediately has to dislike him.

Speaker 1 But for not a good reason. It's never a good reason.
There's never a good reason. And then it's a reason that can quickly be removed.
So it's really not a conflict.

Speaker 1 It's a conflict the way like I'd like to come over there, but there's a small tissue in the way.

Speaker 1 You know what I mean? Well, there's usually some big city ex-boyfriend that they've got to kind of like get out from under, but barely. I don't know.
I've seen ones where it really is just.

Speaker 1 I've gone back and looked for the conflict and haven't found it.

Speaker 3 Do you think you could write a Hallmark movie?

Speaker 1 Yes, I do.

Speaker 3 Do you think you should?

Speaker 1 I think I should.

Speaker 1 That's the better question.

Speaker 1 I think it would be a good use of my time.

Speaker 3 I really want you to write a Hallmark movie.

Speaker 1 Do you think you could star in all of this? Didn't somebody, I thought, did somebody make a Hallmark in somebody? Will Farrell and Christian Wick? Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 Will Farrell and Christian Wig did one, and it's brilliant because, so it's been done. If they hadn't done it, I would do it, but it wouldn't be that funny.

Speaker 1 Would your situation, if you're the star of a Hallmark movie, what's your situation? Who are you meeting? Where are you going? Who are you leaving? And where are you leaving? Well, geez. Okay.
Wow.

Speaker 1 This is a lot.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Well,

Speaker 1 let's see.

Speaker 1 I am

Speaker 1 a guy,

Speaker 1 very good-looking. This is the part I play.
Oh, come on. There's prosthetics.
Get off my ass. And light.
With prosthetics and lighting and CGI, they could do all kinds of shit to my face. Okay.

Speaker 1 So anyway, I'm a guy. who

Speaker 1 has built an inn.

Speaker 1 I have an inn, and it's up and I'm very rugged and I sort of look like the brawny paper towel guy.

Speaker 3 Wait, you're playing a rugged guy? You're playing the rugged archetype?

Speaker 1 I said CGI.

Speaker 3 No, I'm not saying.

Speaker 1 Look,

Speaker 3 I think you're an academic. You're teaching at a university and you're like a frazzled professor.

Speaker 1 I think that's more your CGI. You know,

Speaker 1 but you're handsome.

Speaker 3 And you don't need CGI.

Speaker 1 Stop being mean to you. I appreciate the notes because that helped me.
Sometimes I see myself differently than other people do. And I do see myself as a woodsman,

Speaker 1 as someone.

Speaker 1 Not even an outdoorsman. You have the specific trait of a woodsman.

Speaker 1 I swear to God, did you know that I sued Brawny?

Speaker 1 You did. I sued the Brawny paper towel people because I said, you totally ripped me off.

Speaker 1 Because it was around the time I was doing the tourist sonar. Remember when I had the red beard?

Speaker 1 And I sued them and I said, you totally ripped me off. And Judge threw it out.

Speaker 1 And he did a picture. He had a side-by-side picture of me in

Speaker 1 Boxers and the drawing of the Brawny guy. And apparently they just threw it out immediately.
And I tried to take it to the Supreme Court. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I have to interject here. This is, by the way, I just want to introduce.
This is Aaron Blair. We call him Blay.
That's right. And several major celebrities have told you to shut the fuck up.

Speaker 1 That's right. When you interject.
Tom Vegas. That's right.
Harrison Ford and Tom Hanks.

Speaker 1 Yeah. So whenever Harrison shut the fuck up, actually.

Speaker 1 Okay. And so let's hear it.
Well, I just wanted to say, I am a huge fan of Hallmark movies and Lifetime movies. And every Monday, I watch a movie with like on Twitch with some people.

Speaker 1 And I think you would be really interested in a series by Viveka A. Fox that's on Lifetime called The Wrong X.
So, like, The Wrong Man. Okay.
The wrong tutor. Right.
The wrong stepmother.

Speaker 1 Is every episode different? Every episode is different, but they're all kind of the same. And I think you would be perfect for, and I want to start a campaign for you to be in one of these movies.

Speaker 1 I would do it. I would do that.
There's always a moment and you want conflict. Oh, there's conflict.
Okay. There's always someone in a hoodie peeking around a tree.
Oh, I could be a guy in a hoodie.

Speaker 1 And you are a guy in a hoodie right now. I'm wearing a hoodie now.
And at the end, many times, many times I've peeked around a tree at people. And at the end, she's a good person.

Speaker 1 I mean, nobody says the title of the movie. So she's like, told you he was the wrong man.

Speaker 1 Told you it was the wrong tutor. And I think you would be perfect for this.
And I want to start a campaign. Okay.

Speaker 1 I'm okay with that. And I want to play this part.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 money doesn't matter. You know, I'll make sure that, I mean, as long as they, you know, you know what?

Speaker 1 What? I'm not sure that these movies have a huge bug. in it.
I'm just going to put it out there.

Speaker 1 But they're fantastic. And there's like, I think there's, I think I've seen free.
Yeah, I think I've seen 19 of them. I'm not even kidding.
Okay. Blade.

Speaker 1 First of all, first of all, you know that when someone says money doesn't matter, it means it all depends on.

Speaker 1 But second of all, I'm willing to do it, but I think we should explore, because I do take constructive criticism, and I do think I'd probably a frazzled academic. Yes.

Speaker 1 But one of those things where when I take my glasses off, the woman realizes he's, you know, he cleans up okay.

Speaker 1 But should it be that you are in a current relationship with a kind of mean snobby academic and you go to a rural area and suddenly you meet this let's say like woodsman a nature guide a woman who's like does white water rafting and breaks you out of your shell and you don't know what to do and you frolic and she finds the real you oh first of all i'm petrified yeah and then you leave her and go back to the no no i no no i i i have i i work at a small new england college yeah yes and what do you teach history what's that history i just only my one subject is Grover Cleveland.

Speaker 1 Oh, I'm a professor of Grover. Yeah, I'm a professor of Grover Clevelandology.

Speaker 3 And it has to be liberal arts. It has to be.
No, it doesn't have to be.

Speaker 1 Because you're sensitive.

Speaker 3 Give me something. This is your archival.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 3 You're a sensitive man. You know what? She's right.
I've seen, you guys think this is a game for me. This is real world.
Okay.

Speaker 1 I'm a sensitive guy. I teach like Emily Dickinson.
I teach poetry. Yes.
Okay.

Speaker 1 So, and I, and I have a very safe but frigid relationship with this other woman who works there she's controlling she's controlling and she's always saying things like

Speaker 1 maybe this weekend we'll go and look at that antique shop and it's always very sounds pretty good

Speaker 3 how long how soon is she gonna be single no she wants to go teach at a big city like ivy league university and you're like this is my home this is where i i love to

Speaker 1 just go

Speaker 1 here

Speaker 3 then you're like okay i need to go find myself so you go on this white water rafting trip which is so outside of your comfort zone.

Speaker 1 And it's, and then I get to do my trademark Conan physical comedy where I'm, I'm like, wow, wow. And

Speaker 1 my glasses are getting knocked off and my book goes in the water. Yes.
And symbolically. And she keeps saying,

Speaker 1 dude, just chill. Just go with the flow.
The whole trick of white water rafting is just letting loose.

Speaker 1 And then you guys kind of get marooned on a little forest island and you have to like kind of spend the night and make a fire together and stuff like that. And I'm, of course, I'm inept, right?

Speaker 1 Yeah, I'm sorry.

Speaker 3 I don't care, but that's okay.

Speaker 1 It's okay. But then there's one point where she's kind of fed up with me, and I look up at the stars, and from memory, I recite this beautiful, like, Walt Whitman poem.

Speaker 1 And she sees me in a different way. And then we go into a tent, and this is the part that's going to depart a little from Hallmark.

Speaker 1 We fuck

Speaker 1 like animals. We go at it.
And at first, the camera's outside the tent and you just see silhouettes. But then the camera pushes into the tent

Speaker 1 and it's two naked animals.

Speaker 1 And I'm just a machine.

Speaker 1 A machine. And then you cut, you have all the cutaways to animals going,

Speaker 1 owls' heads spinning around and deer running away and salmon swimming the wrong direction. Like a mama owl puts its wings over the baby owl's ears.

Speaker 1 And then you come to the, the sun is coming up and you go back to the tent, still going. You're still doing it.
And it's like eight hours later.

Speaker 1 And then I pause to rehydrate. And then, but anyway.
Well, what's the conflict? Well, the conflict is then

Speaker 1 too hard. I have to, no, no, no.

Speaker 1 I lose myself, but that terrifies me. Okay.
So I go rushing back to the New England College where Enid Crudd,

Speaker 1 Professor Enid Crudd, with

Speaker 1 three Ds, C-R-U-D-D-D,

Speaker 1 awaits. And she's like,

Speaker 1 you said you'd be three days and you were four.

Speaker 1 Well, on our calendar, it says we're going to move up to second base.

Speaker 1 We've been going out for years and we have never done it.

Speaker 3 You haven't even done second base?

Speaker 1 With Enid Crudd, and yet I'm away one night with this whitewater rafting woman and god damn it.

Speaker 1 I just went to, Jesus Christ. What's the name of the movie? Hold on a second.
Whitewater.

Speaker 1 Hold Hold it. Rafting.

Speaker 1 Fuck. We got to think of this.
Rapid Love. Rapid Love.
Yeah. Jesus, Sona.

Speaker 1 Why are you wasting your time with us?

Speaker 1 Why are you wasting your time with us?

Speaker 3 I know. I know.
That's where I ask myself every single day.

Speaker 1 Why do I

Speaker 1 do this?

Speaker 1 A lot of times you're saying it out loud

Speaker 1 during the podcast. Why am I here? Why am I wasting my time? Rapid Love.
Yeah. We have to get this made, and I'm going to get on this because I love Vivica A.
Fox. I'd work with her any day.

Speaker 1 I think you would be fantastic in one of these wrong movies. Okay.
I need to start the campaign. But

Speaker 1 this is great. We got a lot of business sorted out.
All right. Let's get to it.
My guest today,

Speaker 1 she's one of my all-time favorites. She's a talented actress.
And saying talented actress does not even come close. No, I love her.
I think she's a phenomenon.

Speaker 1 She starred in the Hulu series, The Great, which is one of my favorite shows. Now you can see her in the new movie, A Complete Unknown.

Speaker 1 This is the Bob Dylan biopic with Timothy Chalamet, and everyone's waiting to see it. It's going to be in theaters Christmas Day.

Speaker 1 El Fanning, welcome.

Speaker 1 I'm ecstatic you're here because am I not right?

Speaker 1 Last time you were here, you left and all of us were just bathed in golden light because you're you're just you've got a great energy. You've got like the nicest, uh, kindest, kindest, and

Speaker 1 like super funny game. And then I came home and my wife was like, well, you're in a good mood.
And I said, I was with El Fanning having a conversation. And I'm as happy as I've ever been.

Speaker 1 And then she started to connect.

Speaker 2 And then you haven't seen me for how long? That was a long time.

Speaker 1 And I haven't seen my wife since that day.

Speaker 1 Pretty much ended it. Thanks to you.
I'm so sorry.

Speaker 1 So sorry. I've never been that happy again.

Speaker 1 No, I'm so happy that you're here. We get it today.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 But I feel the same.

Speaker 1 Well, thank you so much for being here. And we were just, I mean, I mean, and the second you came in, before we could even start recording, you started talking about this.

Speaker 1 Colin show that you were obsessed with for a while when you were in school and how they caught cheaters on it. And we just found out that it was a lie.

Speaker 1 It was a lie.

Speaker 2 Devastated. I can't believe that that's a lie.

Speaker 1 I know. It's sad that these cheaters are fake and that they're not real cheaters.
I know. What was the the show? Just say what it was.

Speaker 2 It was. Ryan's Roses.

Speaker 1 Ryan's Roses.

Speaker 2 Yes, which I think they still do.

Speaker 1 And you used to listen to it when you were going to school.

Speaker 2 Yes, in the mornings, going to school in the mornings. And my grandmother listened.
She actually tuned in.

Speaker 2 This was on the top of my mind because she said that she listened to it the other day and she hadn't listened to it in forever. And we would listen to it together.

Speaker 2 And now I'm like, I have to go break the news to her.

Speaker 1 You don't have to tell your grandmother. No, don't tell her.
I won't tell her.

Speaker 2 She's always skeptical of things being fake, though, actually.

Speaker 1 This isn't like Santa Claus. This is good news that this is fake.
No,

Speaker 1 explain quickly what it is. Well, you know it better than I do because I well, but yeah, Ryan's Roses, it's basically

Speaker 2 Ryan Seacress on Kiss FM, and it's a call-in show where if a partner suspects, you know, that...

Speaker 2 they're being cheated on, someone from Ryan's team will call that person and say, we have, we're a free florist company and we're giving out free flowers today.

Speaker 2 And would you like to give flowers to anyone? Meanwhile, they're being secretly recorded. Their partner's on the other line listening in.
They don't know that.

Speaker 2 And then sometimes they'll send flowers to the person that they're cheating with. Oh, God.
And then they catch them. And then, like, their partner comes on and is like, you,

Speaker 1 that sounds horrific. But then, uh, but then, Sona, you come out with a bombshell.

Speaker 3 That was, it's, they were all actors. That they, it's fake.
It's fake. It's the whole thing is fake.

Speaker 1 And I would, when I was just hearing it for the first time, I thought it would kind of have to be fake because you're destroying. Well, you're destroying lives.

Speaker 3 No, we we all believed it, though. You should hear it.

Speaker 1 They were very good.

Speaker 3 They were. Yeah, they're really believable.

Speaker 2 And then they would even cut out. Like, they'd be like, oh, we lost him.
Yes. You know, like, oh, they hung up.
They realized they were recording and they're gone.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 That's right. And it's like, oh, we can't, we're trying to call him.
We can't get him back.

Speaker 1 I just texted a deep source within Ryan's Roses. And I asked this person if it was fake.
And hopefully by the time this interview is over, we'll have at least their denial, if not admission. Okay.

Speaker 1 Okay. This is good.

Speaker 3 If he responds and he's like, who is this?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 I'll say this is Ryan. Yeah.

Speaker 1 It's what we've been doing. Maybe he doesn't know.
Yeah. He could be Nixon, innocent.

Speaker 2 I said this too when I... You could do it on this, but do it for real.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
That could be a new segment.

Speaker 1 Conan's chocolates. Coco's chocolates.
Coco's chocolate chocolate. Coco, cocoa.
Hey, Conan here from Team Cocoa. And when I send free chocolates to people, who should I send them to?

Speaker 1 Is that your wife? It isn't.

Speaker 1 Is that how it goes? No,

Speaker 1 it's not.

Speaker 3 He has another person. She calls the guy or girl and she'll be like, hey, you've been selected to send a free bouquet of roses to anybody you want.
Who do you want to send them to?

Speaker 1 So it's like you've been punked, you know, but you've been caught cheating.

Speaker 1 Here's the thing. I'm terrified of pranks.
When people say, oh, let's play a prank and we're going to play a prank on someone. People have assumed because I'm in comedy that I would love a prank.

Speaker 1 I hate a prank because I always think someone's going going to get hurt. Yeah.
Their feelings are going to get hurt or they're going to be physically hurt. Like, oh, it's really funny.

Speaker 1 They're going to open the box and this thing's going to spring out. And I immediately go to it's going to detach a cornea.
Someone's going to get hurt.

Speaker 2 Yeah, well, because you hear those things. And then it's like, oh, it was all just for, you know, a laugh.

Speaker 1 And then it's like, they're dead. They're dead.

Speaker 1 Wait a minute.

Speaker 1 No, I wasn't allowed.

Speaker 1 I don't think you should be pulling pranks, L.

Speaker 1 L's pranks are always like, yeah, and then it's a bomb. No, no, L, L.
Yeah, but it's funny because who would expect a bomb? Elle.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 2 No, we weren't really allowed, like my sister and I, like, pranking. We weren't a pranking household.
No, it's too dangerous. Yeah, that's what my mom was like, like, no, no, you don't pranks.

Speaker 1 Let's talk about your childhood because you grew up in Conyers, Georgia. Yes.
And it blew my mind because I realized today that that is the birthplace of Mr. Jack McBray, who plays Kenneth the Page.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Kenneth the Page from 30 Rock is from Conyers, Georgia.

Speaker 2 Oh, yes, but I know him.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah, you know him real well.

Speaker 1 I know. Wait, I think he's too.

Speaker 1 Wow, this is a terrible day for Jack McGrair. I don't know what I do.
Jack Mahoo?

Speaker 1 From 30, what?

Speaker 1 Who played Kenneth the He?

Speaker 1 I really do.

Speaker 2 I think he knows my aunt really well. And I think they went to school.

Speaker 1 Oh, that's so funny. He is a guy who would bother your aunt.
Wait,

Speaker 1 let me make sure that I'm thinking. Yeah, no, totally.
And I've actually hung out with him a lot of times. Yay!

Speaker 1 I just want to. Because he does know my aunt.
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 You don't know him. You don't know him from all of his film work.
He's in Wreck-It Ralph. He's just not someone that I think, like, you know,

Speaker 2 prayer.

Speaker 1 Like, oh, I know him real well, and I never think of him.

Speaker 1 I've spent a whole day with him and everything.

Speaker 2 Exactly from there. So it's a small, small town.

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 1 I constantly give him shit all the time about everything. And

Speaker 1 whenever whenever we're like i had lunch with him not that long ago right near his apartment uh and we i just love to if we get on an elevator i'll go now don't be scared about this technology i know you don't have elevators in conyers georgia and he had such a thick accent yes oh my god he sounds like a donkey and uh oh my god

Speaker 1 he's like

Speaker 1 um anyway jack is just getting like offended left and right no no no we have this relationship where I've been doing nothing but abuse this man for like 20 some odd years.

Speaker 1 I've never had a real conversation with him in my life. But anyway.

Speaker 2 But he's the only other person you know that's from there.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Congress, Georgia. And yeah, what you got there? I have an update.
And from this person I will not name. Okay, that's okay.
I asked, is Ryan's Roses fake? It is, right?

Speaker 1 And the person said, depends on who is asking and what they would want to use this information for.

Speaker 1 Well, we have our answer then. We have our answer.
We have our answer. Okay.

Speaker 2 Cut that bit out.

Speaker 1 No. No, right? Why? Why cut it out? I want to see they're going to.
I want to see what they're continuing to text. And I do.

Speaker 1 I don't want to jeopardize their standing. Okay.

Speaker 1 Okay. Okay.
Sure. Yeah.
Well,

Speaker 1 you're the one that introduced this to me. I know.
You know, you introduced this, and now it's part of the podcast, and

Speaker 1 you're a terrible person. I did not introduce this.

Speaker 1 Well, you said I'll contact the guy. Oh, anyway, any mention of Kanye's Georgia has to come out, too.
And also, any mention of Al Fanning. Also, I never said it was a guy.
Okay. Oh, good cover.

Speaker 1 Hey, Sona, I heard you got a new car. Yeah.
You know, David usually gives me a ride to work, but I'd love it if you. No, no, no.

Speaker 3 You're not. I'm sorry.
You're not allowed in my new car.

Speaker 3 My Palisade is my oasis. It's my happy place.

Speaker 2 So you're not allowed in my past.

Speaker 1 Wait a minute. What are you talking about? I made you.

Speaker 1 When I found you, you were wandering the streets with a bucket on your head. What? And now you're Sonoma Obsession and you're driving around the Palisade.
You won't give me a ride.

Speaker 3 This is why I don't let you in my happy place because you talk about me walking around with a bucket on my head. Why would I let you into my personal oasis if this is the way you're going to talk?

Speaker 3 You have to earn your spot.

Speaker 1 Well, earn it in my Hyundai Python. The whole new Hyundai Palisade hybrid is more than just another SUV.
It's still the Palisade, but with so much more, like up to 600 plus miles of range.

Speaker 1 That's incredible. Yeah, it is.
And class-leading interior space. So much space.
Now, have you enjoyed that extra space?

Speaker 3 I'm being very serious right now. If you recline the seat all the way back, a little ottoman pops up so you can sleep comfortably in the front seat.

Speaker 1 That's insane. Yeah.
There are seating configurations for seven to eight passengers with available third-row power seats that recline plus available front and second row relaxation seats.

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Speaker 1 Where were we? Let's see. Conyers, Georgia.
We're back after having an off-mic discussion. Sure.
Yeah, we had a quick off-mic discussion because someone here got us into legal jeopardy.

Speaker 1 Matt Gorley.

Speaker 1 That was my superlative in high school, most legally dubious. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 I did something very recently where there was a child actor on set

Speaker 1 and I was playing a Santa Claus and there was a quick break and this woman came on the set, grabbed the child, and took the child into another room, and started teaching her algebra really quickly.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Like in between the shots.
Literally, you know, like a cosine, and then

Speaker 1 you know,

Speaker 1 remember, negative numbers, and then we got to get back on set.

Speaker 2 It's like negative numbers, negative numbers.

Speaker 1 But that's what it was like, right?

Speaker 2 It really was. Yeah, totally.
Cause I, I mean, I went to a regular school from

Speaker 2 fourth grade on

Speaker 2 and graduated uh senior year, whatever. But um

Speaker 2 when I would work, I would like go and I'd had a studio teacher that would teach me things and it would be like, you'd be doing these like really intense scenes, like be like crying and then going down to like a basement where they've like set up a little, you know, picnic table and two chairs and you're there and having to do your schoolwork.

Speaker 2 Right. And then I also, because the school that I went to was pretty hard, like I had to keep up with the schoolwork or like I couldn't do films, which I mean, I think it was very important.

Speaker 2 But then I would be like staying up to like 3 a.m. like getting stuff done and like writing papers.
And like, I think now I'm like, how did I do that?

Speaker 1 No, but you think of it.

Speaker 2 Like I had the energy to do that when I was little. And now when I'm doing a project, I'm like so exhausted at the end of the day.

Speaker 2 But it used to be that I would go home and have all this like work to do and book reports.

Speaker 1 I'm like, how did I find the time? But it's just so funny for me to think of,

Speaker 1 you know, an actor at your level who's doing this intense work. Even as a, even as a kid, you're doing this intense work and then quickly take a break and you got to go make a papier-mâché dinosaur.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 But it's kind of nice.

Speaker 2 Yeah. There's something about it that is nice because you can, you switch in and out of it.
And it's, I don't know, not that, I'm not the type of actor, anyways, that really stays in it in between.

Speaker 2 Like I need to go do something else or, you know,

Speaker 2 but go to crafty and like laugh and relax. And like, I don't really stay totally in it.

Speaker 2 But I think because when I was a kid, I was so used to switching in and out of it that that's what I'm programming. It's funny,

Speaker 1 it's making me think now: wouldn't it be amazing if it was required of everyone, not just kids, but anyone during in-between scenes had to learn stuff?

Speaker 1 So I was just thinking of like,

Speaker 1 yeah, but I'm thinking of like Al Pacino and Scarface, you know, and he's just doing this over the top, like, misfired all my little friend, and then they're cut, and he's in the next room, and they're like, now remember, the Kansas-Nebraska Act in 1950.

Speaker 1 He's like, oh, yeah, I got her. I think I got it.

Speaker 1 So, okay. So, everything.

Speaker 1 So,

Speaker 1 everything north of the 50-degree latitude had to be okay. Those should be okay.
A free state, but anything below. Okay.
And back on sales. Say hello to my uncle.

Speaker 1 I think everyone has to do that. I like that.

Speaker 1 You know, it's hard for me to believe that you've never... You've never done a scene or you've never acted in a scene with your sister.
Like, you guys haven't done that yet.

Speaker 2 It's crazy. We've done, I think the closest thing was an animated, we were in My Neighbor Totoro when they did the American, the English dubbing version of that.

Speaker 2 And I was four and Dakota was eight, I guess. And we played sisters in that, but it was voiceover.
It's not the same. Not the same at all.
No, no.

Speaker 1 Are you guys looking for something?

Speaker 2 Yes, yes. And we have a production company that we're producing projects together.
Is it Llewellyn?

Speaker 1 Yeah, Llewellyn Pictures.

Speaker 1 Did Llewellyn do The Great? Did you guys, were you a producer on the Great? Yes, yes. Wow,

Speaker 1 That is good for you.

Speaker 2 Yeah, really cool. And Llewellyn is our, she's our family dog.

Speaker 1 But yeah,

Speaker 2 that's, we're honoring her. But she, yeah, we have this.
We're, you know, always looking at projects.

Speaker 2 And we had a couple projects that were like, oh, it's almost going to work out that we were going to do together. And there are still some ideas because we have to make it happen.

Speaker 2 It's like, it's crazy that

Speaker 2 we're always looking for it.

Speaker 1 I'm going to write the script. Great.
Yeah,

Speaker 1 and yeah, no, no, it's good. And I've never, listened first of all never written a movie script but and you'll be the third sister yeah i'll be the third

Speaker 1 yeah i'll look like i'll look like the wendy's girl

Speaker 1 dude check off's three sisters you know what i love it'll be yeah it'll be you two and people will be like this is great this is fantastic then ding dong

Speaker 1 Me in a big red wig.

Speaker 1 Totally like checking out, looking into the camera lens, doing all the things you're not supposed to do.

Speaker 1 Totally unbelievable. Yeah.
Wearing heels, six foot eight.

Speaker 1 Well, sisters.

Speaker 1 Well, I think that's very cool. You guys both have,

Speaker 1 because I know fashion,

Speaker 1 you know, fashion is very important to you. Yes.
And

Speaker 1 you seem like a very artistic type. I know you cook and you like to express yourself in different ways and you like fashion.
You like to take risks. Yeah.
I do not take fashion risks.

Speaker 2 You are wearing a cashmere hoodie under a blazer.

Speaker 1 Yeah, basically. That is a risk.
It's called the Larry David. I think this is what means.
Well, that's a risk.

Speaker 2 No, but it's like, it's a good color combo.

Speaker 1 Thank you.

Speaker 2 I'm actually doing a navy.

Speaker 1 I'm doing a bad thing. It's very interesting.
I'm doing a charitable thing tonight.

Speaker 1 So I'm usually dressed down for the podcast, but because I'm doing this charity thing tonight, I need to be dressed up a little bit. So this is me,

Speaker 1 I would say,

Speaker 1 but I don't take fashion risks. I mean, I don't, what I'm saying is, I know that you'll really go for it sometimes.
Yeah, yeah. which is cool.
I don't think I have the guts to do that.

Speaker 2 I mean, I think I always like growing up, I was kind of allowed to like put my outfits together and wear what I wanted to. I did a lot of like thrifting and vintage shopping and stuff like that.

Speaker 2 So, and then it's like, I don't know, acting, it also comes with this whole other area that's like this red carpet side, which is like, you know, which is weird because it's like not everyone.

Speaker 2 likes to do that just because you're in movies it doesn't necessarily mean that you want to like get your picture taken all the time sure but I think, I don't know, for me, maybe I was like, I do like this.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 2 I do like the red carpet kind of artistic expression and getting to, it's like another character, you know? Yeah. And keeping up with those things.

Speaker 1 It is so unfair. We'll be going someplace and we'll be seen and my wife will be in the closet for an hour and she'll keep coming out and trying different things.
And I just go in and put on a suit.

Speaker 1 I know. And,

Speaker 1 you know, and what my, I just put on a suit and people go, and everything is just like, yep, check, you're fine.

Speaker 1 And my wife will come in, she'll come out, she's in a beekeeper's outfit, and she goes back in, she comes out, she's, you know, she's wearing like a, you know, a lion costume. Yeah, she's trying

Speaker 1 fur pants with like armored

Speaker 1 Flemish armored top. You know, she's trying all this crazy stuff.

Speaker 1 But I feel like it's so much, the pressure is so much different.

Speaker 2 Yeah, there is. There is.
And there are some days you're just like, oh, gosh, like you have to think so much about that stuff. But then, I don't know, other times it's, it's very fun.

Speaker 2 But it's interesting with like, with a movie like this, like certain press tours and stuff, you know, that it's going to be, oh, you know,

Speaker 2 what clothes you wear? And like, that's a part of promoting films now.

Speaker 1 I don't know. Like, literally, what clothes you wear.
Well, let's talk about this.

Speaker 2 And especially like Timothy Chalamet, he's a fashionista himself.

Speaker 1 He is quite the fashionista. I just, uh,

Speaker 1 I just was

Speaker 1 past the television the other day, and a commercial play, it was a men's cologne ad that he's in for Chanel.

Speaker 1 For Chanel, and he's like falling through the air, wearing, and I just thought that should have been me. They are never coming to me.

Speaker 1 Oh, wow. Look,

Speaker 1 if we can't get Timmy Chalamé, we've got Conan O'Brien on the line.

Speaker 2 Martin Scorsese directed that ad.

Speaker 1 Oh, really?

Speaker 1 Well, let's get into it because

Speaker 1 a complete unknown, highly anticipated biopic about Bob Dylan. And you are in this movie and you are playing.
It's interesting. You're playing kind of a composite character.

Speaker 2 Yes. I mean, she, I play in the film, her name is Sylvie Russo, but she's based on Suze Vertolo,

Speaker 2 who was Bob Dylan's girlfriend.

Speaker 1 And she's on the cover. Exactly.
I mean, I know

Speaker 1 the iconic, one of the most iconic covers ever is for The Free Wheel and Bob Dylan, where he's walking down the street in Greenwich Village. Yes.

Speaker 1 He's with a woman who's like sort of holding his arm and snuggling up against him. And that was his girlfriend at the time.

Speaker 2 Yes, and that's her.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And so that's who you're playing with.

Speaker 2 That is. And it's really, honestly, it's really true to their relationship.

Speaker 2 It's just her name is different. That's the only thing.
And I think it was actually out of a request from...

Speaker 2 Bob Dylan himself because everyone else's name is what their name was.

Speaker 1 Except for Timmy, who plays Dob Bylin. Yeah,

Speaker 1 he's a folk singer, but everything's a little off. Exactly.
He sings glowing in the wind.

Speaker 1 Stand, lady, stand. Stand, lady, stand.
Stand, lady, stand.

Speaker 1 Do not sit down. You must stand.

Speaker 1 Stand, lady, stand.

Speaker 1 Well, first of all, I am so excited to see this film. And I would think, because also I'm fascinated with that period.
We're talking 1961, 6061 around that era in the village.

Speaker 1 And I've always thought clearly there are times in American, not just American history, in any, in all world history, there are times where there's a moment that happens in a city that's organic.

Speaker 1 It happens in a place. It happened in Seattle.
in the late 80s, early 90s with Grunge. It happened in Liverpool in the late 50s and 60s.
Something was going on in the village in the 50s.

Speaker 1 Stuff is percolating.

Speaker 1 And Bob Dylan makes his way there from Hibbings, Minnesota

Speaker 1 and changes everything.

Speaker 1 And so, I mean, and you guys are incredible actors. I'm, I'm cannot wait to see this movie.

Speaker 2 Yeah, it was so amazing to see. And I, yeah, because it's

Speaker 2 takes place from like 61 to 1965 of basically ending when he was at the Newport Folk Festival and goes electric for the first time. And It changes the course of music forever.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 2 And I think he was, well, he was called Judas at that festival.

Speaker 2 I don't know if it was at that one.

Speaker 2 I know in our movie it is because we play,

Speaker 2 you know, we try to stay true, of course, to what happened. But then at the same time, it is a film.

Speaker 2 And James Mangold, who directed the movie, he wanted to take liberties as well because it is a movie. And also Bob Dylan himself as a figure, he is so mysterious.

Speaker 2 And he himself likes to play with what's true or not. You know, we don't necessarily know all the truths.

Speaker 1 First of all, I have no time for people that sit and watch a biopic and say, hold on a second, that happened in October. I know.

Speaker 1 What they described in the film, it's November because they just had, you know, I think.

Speaker 2 And there are those people.

Speaker 1 Yes, there are those people, but the point of

Speaker 1 a film like this, an endeavor like this, in my opinion, is to capture the spirit and the energy of what was happening

Speaker 1 and transport you.

Speaker 1 It is not a visit to the IRS where you have all of your documents ready. So

Speaker 1 the stuff that happens

Speaker 1 in entertainment that is so out there and so explicit and so crazy.

Speaker 1 And you realize that Bob Dylan basically just plugged in his guitar and played electric at a folk festival, and someone in the crowd shouts, Judas! Yes,

Speaker 1 because

Speaker 1 I mean, it's so preposterous now and so laughable. But there are these famous stories of he's he's playing in Pete Seeger's backstage with an axe trying to cut the electricity cable.
So they say that.

Speaker 1 So they say. Again, so they say, but

Speaker 1 you think about,

Speaker 1 oh, Pete, rap hasn't shown up yet, you know, like

Speaker 1 funk rap. I mean, there's all this stuff that's going to blow your mind.
You know, like he's still playing folk with an electric guitar. Exactly.

Speaker 2 And it just takes that kind of one person

Speaker 2 to be daring enough to change, you know, and step outside of the box.

Speaker 1 He risked, I mean, he risked, he disappointed his core fan base, which you're never supposed to do. I've done it many times.
I think I'm very brave.

Speaker 3 I think I'm very brave.

Speaker 1 Yes. And if that can be the pull quote from this interview.

Speaker 1 What did Elle say about the movie?

Speaker 1 Well, Conan kept talking over her, and he kept shouting, I'm very brave.

Speaker 1 And don't sell yourself short. You've disappointed all of us as well.
I was calling, listen, you are my core fan. No, we are the fanning.
That's the core fan.

Speaker 1 Oh, man. But I would think, I would think.

Speaker 2 We are going to host the Oscars.

Speaker 1 I know. Yeah.
I know. That's insane.
I know. But they'll, I said,

Speaker 1 it's exciting, but I think they'll, after this interview, they'll revoke it. They'll say, Kona, did you shout, I'm brave at El Fannin?

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 1 I would think, El, I mean,

Speaker 1 I was born in 63. So this is ancient history to me because I wasn't connected to it in any way.
But for you, this might as well be 1861. You know, it's such a long time ago.

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 1 the style of that time is so iconic. Oh, completely.
And I mean, not just the music, but getting to,

Speaker 1 I would just think from a... art production standpoint, like I really want to see the movie and I'm looking forward to the performances and the story, but I'm also looking forward to the cars,

Speaker 1 the guitars, the clothing,

Speaker 1 the look of things.

Speaker 2 Yeah, it's really shot with like such authenticity. I mean, we shot in New York and also New Jersey because obviously a lot of those iconic New York streets now are very modernized.
So

Speaker 2 we actually took like in Hoboken kind of created like Cafe Wa and West Village, you know, over there. Arianne Phillips did our costumes and she's just absolutely incredible.

Speaker 2 I think Timmy had like 70 outfit changes because it really goes from him like starting Robert Zimmerman to Bob Dylan.

Speaker 2 Like in, we you see him as someone from Minnesota who like literally just got off the bus and seeing New York for the first time. So there's such an evolution that he takes in the film.

Speaker 2 And I was a huge,

Speaker 2 I it, I saying this, it's like, oh gosh, I hear how I sound, but it honestly is true, but I was a huge Bob Dylan fan because Cameron Crow, I did, we bought a zoo with him when I I was 13.

Speaker 2 I think that's what I came on your show for the first time, but he introduced me to Bob Dylan and I became like a Bob Dylan nut.

Speaker 2 And I wasn't allowed to have posters on my room, but I had a corkboard and on the corkboard, I had Bob Dylan up there. And I would write every day.

Speaker 2 And I have, I have to find photos of this something, but in middle school, I would write Bob Dylan on my hand right here in cursive. every day.

Speaker 1 Wow. Like weird.

Speaker 2 But also, I don't know. That was, I don't know why I also did that.
I think I was like, I'm cool. You know, I like Bob Dylan.
And in middle school, I was like, you don't know who he is.

Speaker 1 You know, and I'm like, I do. But

Speaker 2 I did that.

Speaker 1 And I really did.

Speaker 2 So I feel like I manifested getting this part.

Speaker 1 It's kind of wild.

Speaker 1 You manifested it. Yeah, you manifested it.

Speaker 2 Kids in school were like, What is that? Who is that? I'm like, you don't know.

Speaker 1 Wow. You sounded like an awful kid.
I know.

Speaker 1 I was just more like, oh, you know.

Speaker 1 I love that. You don't know, do you?

Speaker 1 Well, I wrote his name on my hand and you couldn't possibly know. Exactly.
What kind of kid were you?

Speaker 1 Well, bye-bye now.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I

Speaker 2 went to. Well, but I was very excited about

Speaker 1 doing this.

Speaker 2 I was like, what? And they came to me.

Speaker 1 I was like, people have dream boards where they're supposed to, right? You're supposed to. Vision boards.
Vision boards where you're supposed to. Your hand was your vision board.

Speaker 2 That's right.

Speaker 1 You were just manifesting things.

Speaker 2 Totally. Totally.
I mean, I, you know, they, I know this, the movie they'd been trying to do for a while and with the strike and COVID and like Timothy's been training for it for like five years now.

Speaker 2 So he, he sang everything live. He did the guitar live and it was really kind of amazing, like hearing him for the first time.
Like it was extraordinary. And we were in.

Speaker 1 It's so funny when you said he'd been training really hard. I thought he went the Marvel route.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And so he shows up as this completely jacked and he just misunderstood.

Speaker 1 Bob Dylan just all roided up. Exactly.
G-shaped torso. Yeah.
I'm all set to go. I put on 100 and I put on 150 pounds of muscle.
Well, now we need to do your algebra. Come on.

Speaker 1 Yeah, exactly. Yeah.
So what,

Speaker 1 so I didn't realize. I didn't realize he did all of his own.
He did.

Speaker 2 Yeah, all of his own singing. I was in like an auditorium for the first time and hearing him.
sing. I think it was A Hard Rain's Gonna Fall.
He was singing that.

Speaker 2 And all the background artists in the auditorium were like, that's not him. Like, he's lip singing.
I was like, yes, it is. I like tapped him.
I was like, I know it is. I know it's him.

Speaker 1 You're always a know-it-all in all your stories.

Speaker 1 Again.

Speaker 1 And I happen to know it is.

Speaker 1 And I've written it is on my hand. I'm the most annoying person.
Like, well, it actually is.

Speaker 1 Oh, no.

Speaker 1 We should have you just pop into the podcast every now and then and go, uh-uh.

Speaker 1 It is. And I haven't.
Was that Al Fanning who just popped through that little window? Wait, you have Conan O'Brien written on her hand currently.

Speaker 1 I'll start. I'll start.

Speaker 2 I don't know what that'll manifest, but you know.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah. Oh, you don't want to know.

Speaker 1 Being on the podcast a ninth time.

Speaker 1 That's so cool. I'm looking forward to, I'm really looking forward to seeing it.

Speaker 1 And, you know, one of the things that fascinates me about Bob Dylan and always has is he was a shapeshifter, probably still is a shapeshifter, totally made shit up left and right.

Speaker 1 So there's this famous introduction a couple of years before the incident where he plugged in, there's this famous incident where Bob Dylan's introduced by Pete Seeger at a folk festival.

Speaker 1 And Pete Seeger says, you know, he tried to run away from home nine different times, but was caught and returned.

Speaker 1 And then finally he like jumped a train and came here and camped out with hobos and here he is tonight. And he and they everyone believed that.

Speaker 1 It later turned out to be his like parents were like, well, good luck.

Speaker 1 Here's a, here's some money. And don't forget to write.
Here's a cell phone. Yeah.
Here's a credit. You know, whatever.
He had made it up. Yeah.

Speaker 2 And he said he worked it or that he like worked at a carnival. Yes.

Speaker 1 And yeah, he said part of the traveling circus, which I don't know if that's true. I don't know.

Speaker 1 But I guess I think it's part of an American tradition where William Faulkner completely made up his past. Ernest Hemingway made up stuff.
Great artists invent themselves. I believe that.

Speaker 1 And they come up with all these stories. And I think Faulkner had everyone convinced that he had flown in the Royal Air Force in World War I.
It's like, nope, completely untrue.

Speaker 1 You know, he was like tending a furnace, you know,

Speaker 1 somewhere in like Tennessee or something, but that it's part of the creative process in a weird way. Sometimes you hear it and you think, oh, yeah, that's that's a sociopath.

Speaker 1 But no, that was his, that was part of his process, was inventing himself.

Speaker 2 Yeah, definitely. And I think even like through his, I mean, obviously his songs, and he's like one of the greatest writers, I think, that we have.

Speaker 2 I mean, and it is interesting, like thinking about he didn't want to kind of deal with the fuss of people judging him for his past. You know, like he just was like, this is my work.

Speaker 2 I want you to judge at face value.

Speaker 1 I thought it was hilarious when he won the Nobel Prize. And I just love that he was annoyed.

Speaker 1 I don't want to go. Where do I have to go again?

Speaker 1 You know, just like annoyed by it all. Yes.
Which would not be anyone else's reaction to winning the Nobel Prize. Exactly.
Didn't want the fuss. Yeah.

Speaker 2 I know, I never, I haven't met him. Wait, did you?

Speaker 1 I thought you did meet Bob Dylan.

Speaker 2 No, I did not.

Speaker 2 I was told, no, Timothy hasn't met him either. Jim has met him, James Mangold, but we have not met him.
I was told that I was going to have a rehearsal. with Jim and Bob Dylan.

Speaker 2 I got this email. And I was like, oh my God.
I was like, this is amazing. Like, I have to pick out what I'm going to wear.
I have to, like, what am I going to say to him? What am I going to ask?

Speaker 2 I'm like, so excited. And I walk in the next day, and it's Jim and Timmy.

Speaker 1 Oh, no. And I was like, oh, what?

Speaker 1 Boom. I know.
Who wants to meet Timothy? I know. Shall I? I know.

Speaker 1 I was like, what a whim.

Speaker 2 I thought it was Bob Dylan. We were laughing.

Speaker 1 Was he your character the whole time or something?

Speaker 2 No, I think it's just like sometimes they do that on TV.

Speaker 1 He's just being whimsical. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Well, there's, you know, and, you know, an assistant had like written it down, Bob Dylan.

Speaker 2 It was like both names, like Bob Dylan, all caps, bold in bold. So, maybe I should have realized

Speaker 1 I've met him briefly. I've told it before, I've told it before, but just because you're here and it lines up perfectly, I can do it really quickly.

Speaker 1 Backstage at a concert with my good friend and guitarist Jimmy Vivino in this sort of backstage area. And then I'm pushed, like literally pushed into a room, and there's a bunch of people there.

Speaker 1 And then, suddenly, I'm because of the way people are moving in the room, suddenly I'm sort of spit out at the front of the room and there is Bob Dylan staring at me.

Speaker 1 And I'm right in front of him and he's got the little tiny pencil mustache that he had during that phase where he's wearing the string ties and the little pencil mustache.

Speaker 1 And he looks at me and he goes, Hey, I know you from the TV. Whoa.

Speaker 1 And then just then I get interrupted by somebody who literally drags me out of my one conversation I'm going to have with Bob Dylan. And Bob Dylan like skitters away.
Oh, no.

Speaker 1 And that person was Al Gore.

Speaker 1 And I've always been pissed at Al Gore ever since because literally he went, hey, I know. He said, I know you from the TV.
And I'm about to go, like, oh my God, Bob Dylan.

Speaker 1 And I'm just about to speak to him. And he's looking at me when I hear, Conan, Conan, it's me, Al Gore.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 Global warming's a reality.

Speaker 1 It's an inconvenient truth.

Speaker 1 The Earth is warming by three degrees every fifth.

Speaker 1 And I see Bob Dylan shrug and kind of walk away.

Speaker 1 Did you know that?

Speaker 2 And that was it.

Speaker 1 But he knows you. He knows me from the TV.
He didn't know my name. And it wasn't the TV.
It was the TV

Speaker 1 accent on the TV. You got to get to Chalamet and tell him that's how you pronounce TV.
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 You should have told him. I saw him at

Speaker 2 a concert right before.

Speaker 2 We went at the Kings Road Theater in New York.

Speaker 2 And I saw him. And I actually,

Speaker 1 so sad,

Speaker 2 I had eaten a bad turkey sandwich and I was like in the middle, like the concert, I'd never seen Bob Dylan live before. And I'm like, I knew I was doing the movie and Timothy was there and or there.

Speaker 2 And I just was like, oh no, I'm going to throw up. And so it was, I had to leave like halfway through.

Speaker 2 And actually, I, so I ran out of the stadium and it's like a beautiful theater, like really kind of grand and gold. It's like, it's really pretty.

Speaker 2 Run out right next to the concession stand, like in the lobby. And I, I can't make it to the bathroom just puke turkey sandwich all in the carpet.

Speaker 1 Oh, my God.

Speaker 2 And then I know I was like, oh, gosh. And I had, I had to leave.
And I went to the bathroom.

Speaker 2 And then when I came back, they had like a sad little like cone over my throw up, you know, like avoid this area.

Speaker 2 I was like, no, I have to get back to the concert.

Speaker 1 Oh, that's true. I must see.

Speaker 2 I know. So, darn it.

Speaker 1 It was the turkey sandwich. It was not Bob that made it sound.
Yeah, exactly. It was the turkey sandwich.

Speaker 1 Well, I don't even, I think you met Timmy Chalamet, but you don't even know it.

Speaker 3 I met him right before he blew up. I went and had ice cream with him.

Speaker 3 We went to ice cream after.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.
What was that like? Was he, what was he like? He was cool.

Speaker 3 I mean, he was like a young kid. I mean, you know, he was taught.
He was, he at that point had already been in Inner. Was Interstellar the one with Matthew McConaughey?

Speaker 3 Yeah, he was in that movie already.

Speaker 1 But he had a small part in it.

Speaker 3 And, you know, I think everyone was like, you're going to, you're going to do great.

Speaker 1 You'll be great. And I remember.
And when Call Me By Your Name came out. Yeah.

Speaker 1 You sat him down, I think, and said, I, you know look you should try comedy because acting's not your thing and and and you'll you know try comedy and maybe you could be like half a conan o'brian one day remember when you said i did i did i was like i don't know comedy seems like it would be a better fit for you than drama and he's like i'm gonna show these two yeah yeah yeah you made it yeah we did

Speaker 1 it's because of yeah we already know your villain origin story yeah yeah do you know what he has written on his hand conan is wrong yeah yeah Well, I read that on my hand as well.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I've seen it where yours is a little, yours is fucking wrong. Yeah, I think we all do.

Speaker 3 I think all five of us are.

Speaker 1 I just had it tattooed.

Speaker 1 You know what's so nice?

Speaker 1 I was reading different interviews with you in preparation for chatting to you today, and you said something really interesting to me, which is that you learned, you've learned different things from different people.

Speaker 1 You say that a big part of your education was working with Sophia Coppola.

Speaker 1 So you've, you know, your education continued long after your, your formal education. And I really believe in that.
I really believe we learned so much. But you said that you learned manners

Speaker 1 from working with Kirsten Dunce and Nicole Kidman. You were working with them and you learned manners.
And I thought, nobody talks about manners.

Speaker 1 And now I'm going to sound like an old man, but I promise you, I think it is a magic power. It's a magical thing to be well-mannered.
Yeah. And you are

Speaker 1 exceptionally well-mannered. You're just a, you're, you're a very

Speaker 1 kind person.

Speaker 1 And I, I, I don't think people understand the superpower that that is. Do you know what I mean? And no one, and no one talks about it a lot.
Oh, yeah. They don't talk about man.

Speaker 1 It's all about, well, you know, obviously you got to have talent, but you also have to like, you got to be tactical and you got to do this. And I like, how about, I swear to God, being nice.

Speaker 2 Being well-mannered.

Speaker 1 Being well-mannered. And it's a, it's, and I understand it's maybe it's,

Speaker 1 I've always heard it's part of a southern thing. Like Jack is insanely well-mannered So anytime Jack McBray comes to my house two days later, I get a note

Speaker 1 Sir, it was an honor, you know

Speaker 1 He doesn't say it was an honor, but he does he does write

Speaker 1 He says it was lovely. It was an honor hanging out with your wife

Speaker 1 Everyone likes Liza People tolerate me, but uh but no, it's just like that's such a nice thing.

Speaker 2 Yeah, it's true. I mean, I think like you must have learned a lot.
Just growing up, you know, from I didn't go to like acting class or anything.

Speaker 2 So it's just like being on set and around different personalities and different people and picking up on, you know, what people do. And I mean, honestly, it's like my mom.
Yes.

Speaker 2 Like, you know, she would be on set with me or my grandmother. And I would have, you know, write a note, get rap gifts for everyone.
Like I've just always done that.

Speaker 2 Even like small things about like putting at the end of the day, like your costume, like making sure that it's like hung up, that you hang it up at, at, in, in the trailer.

Speaker 2 Because then you hear, because you hear people say, like, they just throw and they're like, thank you so much for just hanging it up. It's like, well, it takes like a second to do that.

Speaker 1 You know, like, it's, and also, sometimes it makes you realize how other people are behaving. Right.

Speaker 1 I've had situations where, I don't know, I'm doing something and I'll, uh, I don't know, it'll be like a Sirius XM record in New York or something.

Speaker 1 And I'm headed out and I'll pass the person at like the front thing and I'll say, I'm going to get coffee. Do you want any? And they go, what?

Speaker 1 What? And I'm thinking, I'm not giving you a kidney.

Speaker 1 I'm saying I'm getting a coffee. Would you like one too? And you realize, oh, it's such little things like that.

Speaker 2 I know, it just makes you feel better to, I don't know, to be, to be kind. I mean, it sounds so cliche and easy, but I don't, in this business, it's like there's a lot of not nice people.

Speaker 1 Why'd you look at me?

Speaker 1 And by the way, that's a made-up story about getting the coffee.

Speaker 3 I was like, did you really get coffee?

Speaker 1 Fuck that. No, I think you took the coffee from that.

Speaker 1 That's going to be 30 seconds.

Speaker 1 I took her coffee and I said, thanks for the Java. Now go get your own.

Speaker 2 But you are known.

Speaker 2 You actually are known as like the nicest and the best.

Speaker 1 Well, that's very sweet. You are.

Speaker 2 But when you are everyone says it and everyone thinks it.

Speaker 1 And Sona, you've seen the real me.

Speaker 3 I have seen the real you.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 3 Yeah. I have, I have, it's coming out in a tell-all.

Speaker 1 You already wrote it. The real Conan O'Brien.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I did. I know, that's right.
I I did.

Speaker 1 She wrote a New York Times bestseller called World's Worst Assistant. She basically put it all out there.
But it's basically the two of us actually. I think we have a little edge.

Speaker 1 Mostly you read the book, and it's a hilarious book, but you mostly just read the book and think both of these people are idiots who shouldn't be allowed to do anything.

Speaker 3 I think I started writing it thinking it would be a takedown of you, but it was really just an indictment on me and how bad I was as your assistant.

Speaker 3 But having being your assistant, I will say there's a difference you can see between people who will dismiss you and people who actually talk to you.

Speaker 1 I got that a lot. Yeah.

Speaker 3 And it makes a really big difference.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.
What do you mean, people? Remembering people's names.

Speaker 3 You know, people. You know what I mean?

Speaker 2 Like on set, you do meet a lot of people. It's like.

Speaker 3 Assistants, like people can sometimes just be very rude to assistants because they're trying to get to you. And there's a lot of people who

Speaker 1 actually talk to you. I had a really interesting thing happen to me.
I've never forgotten it, which is I was working on The Simpsons. I was a writer-producer there.
This is before I got the talk show.

Speaker 1 And I'm probably, I don't know, 26. I used to just wear like a t-shirt and kind of that, you know, that red James Dean, kind of iconic jacket with the flip-up collar.
I had one of those.

Speaker 1 So I'm wearing, like, that's just how I'm dressed, and I'm wearing sneakers. And I remembered I was going to go meet my friend Suzanne Daniels, who was a big exec over on the Fox lot.

Speaker 1 I remember for some reason, I had a package in my hand that was just my package.

Speaker 1 And I walked into this office and I said, yeah I'm here for Suzanne Daniels and this person behind the desk went yeah just put that down just leave it there and I went well actually I'm here and they went just put it down okay

Speaker 1 like because I'm the delivery guy yeah

Speaker 1 I kept trying to stall and the person was just just looking through me like I didn't exist

Speaker 1 and then of course Suzanne saw me went Conan hey and this person she was like have you met Conan he's a writer producer at the Simpsons and da da da and he's gonna have a late night show in a year and a half even though nobody knows that yet and she just knew.

Speaker 1 Yes, super early. He is a delivery boy.

Speaker 1 But anyway, I just saw in a moment. And then he's like, oh, I saw status completely shift arbitrarily.

Speaker 1 Because why does that make a difference?

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 yeah. Completely.
Yeah. That executive was Jeff Ross.
Oh, I mean, that

Speaker 1 was terrible to me. Oh, I'm sorry.
When he was assistant. Oh, it doesn't make any sense.

Speaker 1 I know.

Speaker 1 You really messed up. I'll fix that up.
Yeah, I got it wrong.

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 1 anyway.

Speaker 1 No, you know who the assistant was? It was a very, very young Timothy Chalaman. Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 Wow. Swinging it around.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I remember. It was a fetus.

Speaker 1 It was like, there was a fetus, a really good-looking fetus

Speaker 1 wearing like some kind of exotic cologne.

Speaker 1 They said, like, just leave the package there. And I said, why do you have an umbilical cord? Just leave the fetus.
Just leave it there. And cue the rap light.
Share the rap light.

Speaker 1 Got us out.

Speaker 1 Everyone's going to see this movie.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 I'm just, it's a complete unknown. It's you, Timothy Chalamet, and Edward Norton.
Edward Norton. Sand and Barbara.
I can't wait to see it. But also.

Speaker 1 Anytime you want to come in and just sit down and talk about anything, you're one of my favorite people. No, seriously,

Speaker 2 I want to pop in now. I want to like, because the office is, it was, this is really nice with the kitchen and everything.
Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Just don't go in there. That's our kitchen.

Speaker 2 Like, I've already have like pockets full of snacks.

Speaker 1 Okay, well, I'll need you to empty your coat before you leave. Snacks don't grow on trees.
No, Conan, they're nuts. They literally grow on trees.

Speaker 1 You are an absolute delight. And as you know, I'm a massive fan of the great.
And

Speaker 1 watching you in that role walk this crazy tightrope of being near-death experiences, being assaulted,

Speaker 1 but then being hilariously funny in the next scene. I don't know how you do it.
It's one of the best performances I've seen in a show ever, and it's one of my favorite shows.

Speaker 1 And then you just have this insane career, and you're a delight. You're a delightful person.
So come back anytime. I will.

Speaker 1 And thanks for being here and sharing your energy with us because these guys are sucking the life out of me.

Speaker 1 We don't talk enough about the unsung heroes of our show. You know, people know they're Matt Gorley.
They know they're Sona Momsessian. They certainly know they're Conan O'Brien.

Speaker 1 But I'm talking about the invisible co-hosts or furniture. Oh, yeah.
I've done some shows in Uncomfortable Furniture. Yeah.
Terrible. You can tell the whole time that I'm in agony.

Speaker 1 That's why when Ashley offered to sponsor the Live from LA event and said that Sona could choose the onstage furniture, we jumped at the chest. Yeah.
How did you do it?

Speaker 3 Well, I am doing interior decorating now. I designed Blaise's place.
I designed my parents' place.

Speaker 1 You do have good taste.

Speaker 3 So I was just like, hey, I want to do this. And it was surprising that no one said I couldn't.
So I just choose whatever sofas I wanted, whatever chairs I wanted, rugs, cute little side tables. Great.

Speaker 1 You used Tallora chairs and love seats. Yes, I did.
And I was very comfortable throughout the entire show.

Speaker 3 So was I. I mean, didn't you want to take a nap?

Speaker 1 I did. In fact, I did during parts.
What?

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Speaker 1 We thought we might initiate a series of staff reviews here at Good Idea Cocoa facilities. We're going to start with your producer, longtime producer, Jeff Ross.

Speaker 1 Jeff Ross, not to be confused with the Roastmaster General, Jeff Ross, the comedian. Jeff Ross has been my producer.
We really started in late night together. What is it, 31 years ago, Jeff?

Speaker 1 93, April of 93. We met in April of 93.
So someone do the math.

Speaker 1 I don't want to. I think it's been a bit.
Can I go to a calculator? No, no. It's been 57 years.

Speaker 3 I don't care enough.

Speaker 1 Anywho, you get the point. We've been together side by side on this crazy adventure through show business.

Speaker 1 And what we're doing, Jeff, is thinking that maybe we just review people, talk to them about their work. It's not going to go well.
No, no, no. It's going to go well.
Of course it's going to go well.

Speaker 1 Jeff, you've been with me at the helm of this ship for a long time.

Speaker 1 We've been through, we've been through highs, we've been through lows, we've been through highs again, then some more lows, then lots of lows, then a quick high, then years and years.

Speaker 1 No, it's been great. It's been great.
We've had a great ride, but I think it's time for a brief catch-up

Speaker 1 lately on your performance here at the show. Jeff, I'm just going to come out and say it.

Speaker 1 In all the time I've known you, you've worn glasses. Okay? This is where you're going.

Speaker 1 You've worn glasses the whole time I've known you. True.
Very recently,

Speaker 1 you had a surgical procedure which you needed to have. This was not elective.
It was a surgical procedure that you needed to have on your eyes.

Speaker 1 And while they were doing that surgery, they were like, hey, we can correct your vision at the same time. Kind of, that's the way it works.
That's the way it works. So they corrected your vision.

Speaker 1 And I didn't, you didn't, first of all, talk to any of us about this. You went ahead and had this surgery, which you had to have, which you had to have.
Hold on. Why would he talk?

Speaker 1 Because I talked to Jeff about all the surgeries I have. That's true.
We talked to each other about our various surgeries.

Speaker 1 When I was circumcised and then I went back and had it put back on. What? And then I was circumcised and then had it put back on again.
I tried to talk him out of it both times. Yeah.

Speaker 3 You had it and you were just like, put it back?

Speaker 1 Yeah, I wanted it back. And they couldn't keep it.
They couldn't. Well, I was holding it.
Here's the thing.

Speaker 1 Jeff had it for a while in his wallet. The way high school kids keep a condom in their wallet.

Speaker 1 People are like, Jeff, you've got a condom in your wallet. He's like, no, no.
It's going to the fourth kid.

Speaker 1 But thank you for keeping it. You're supposed to moisturize it, but he didn't.
Oh, so it's a good one. So anyway, it's back on there just like an old dry pig ear.
Yeah, well,

Speaker 1 we went back and forth two times because I kept changing my mind. Now it's back on and I'm not convinced it's mine.
But that's a whole other story.

Speaker 1 Anyway, that's not why we're having this review. Okay.
The focus should not be on the crazy surgeries that I've had

Speaker 1 butchering my member. Maybe they should be.
But Jeff. Yes.

Speaker 1 You had this thing and you come in and suddenly you're not wearing glasses because you don't need to anymore because you have now 20-20 vision. But I need readers.
You need readers.

Speaker 1 But most of the time you're walking around the office. I just went on, we shot a travel show together in a foreign land.

Speaker 1 We traveled the world together and you're not wearing glasses. And he's Jeff, you will agree, a very good-looking man.
Yes. You're a good-looking guy.

Speaker 1 You are. You're a good-looking man.

Speaker 1 I didn't hear out. Your whole, listen, the whole time I've been with Jeff, people, women always nudge me.
Like, that's Jeff Ross is a good-looking guy. And I'm like, hey, what am I?

Speaker 1 Chop liver over here.

Speaker 1 But Jeff. Make it about you.
What's up? What?

Speaker 3 I said,

Speaker 3 you make it about you?

Speaker 1 Yeah, I was born on Make It About You mountain.

Speaker 1 So Jeff

Speaker 1 isn't wearing glasses now. And he comes in and you walk around.
You're not having glasses on. And I can't get used to it.
And I'm not the only one. A couple of us, Eduardo, feel free to weigh in.

Speaker 1 Weird. It's weird.
I can't get used to it. And here's the thing.
I can't get used to it. And you'll get to talk in just a second.
Wait a minute. I'm not even sure that's true.

Speaker 1 I might just keep talking. That was a great staff for you.

Speaker 1 A lot of us are having trouble adjusting. And the thing is, it's our problem because you've had a certain look for a long time, but and then suddenly it changed.
And you look great,

Speaker 1 but I'm not used to it. What are we going to do? I'm going to say two things.
First of all, I'm not used to it either because still I wake up in the morning and I reach over to the bedside table.

Speaker 1 Actually, it's on my left. And to reach for my glasses and they're not there.
And sometimes at night when I brush my teeth and I wash my face, I reach for my glasses and they're not there.

Speaker 1 What I might do, I'm considering is what you did, which is get like progressive. nothing up top and readers at the bottom.
Yeah. Yeah.
I have. I'm considering that.

Speaker 1 I don't mind wearing glasses and I just decided, yeah, I did the progressive thing. So my eyes without glasses are fine, but I don't like putting glasses on and off all the time.
Yeah, this is a pain.

Speaker 1 And so I just wear glasses so that when I can pick up a book and read.

Speaker 2 I'm sorry, I have a question. This is a staff review?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay, let me get back to the review part of it. Could I just do a segment of reviewing the staff reviews? Because I have a couple notes.
Hold it. But listen.

Speaker 1 But please, let's talk about your progressive. Let's do it.
Well, I didn't put it on that.

Speaker 1 That was Jeff who made the executive producer decision. You asked me a question and I answered it.

Speaker 1 No, here's what I'm saying. I want you to immediately, this is a staff review.
I want you to immediately start wearing glasses.

Speaker 1 I want you to wear them all the time. No, those are at the end of your nose.
Now you look like Grandma Love. I don't look like this one.
Yeah. Yeah.
It doesn't work. Okay.
I want you, and if not.

Speaker 1 I'm going to go do what you did. No, no, no.
Let's not go on.

Speaker 1 I do that a lot anyway. Let's not get on to progressives again because that's a, Sona's told us that's a bad topic.
I had a thought. Go back to your force, game.
No, no, that's a separate episode.

Speaker 1 That's from my staffer. By the way, yeah, that's a different kind of staffer thing.
By the way, I could get it again. Yeah.
So listen, Jeff, I had an idea, which is that you get a tattoo of glasses

Speaker 1 on your eyes.

Speaker 1 You get glasses drawn on as if you fell asleep at a fraternity. And instead of a penis on your cheek, it's just some really nice glasses, Tom Ford glasses.

Speaker 1 Only if we can go back to New Zealand to that place where the guy with the crazy tattoos on his arm does it does it. Okay.
But you like that guy. You like the tattoos.

Speaker 1 I like to keep it secret where we're going, but Jeff, I guess, likes to just blab it out there. I thought it was a secret because everybody knew you were there.
Yeah, that's true.

Speaker 1 I know something in a stadium full of people. You know what I mean? All I heard the whole time was in the van.
Was Bla, how's socials doing? How's socials doing?

Speaker 1 Staff reviews.

Speaker 1 Staff reviews.

Speaker 1 Well, listen.

Speaker 3 I like the idea of no glasses.

Speaker 1 It's a whole lot of things. I just have to get used to it, but I want, I like things.
I'm at a stage in my life. I'm no spring chicken where I like things to be the same.

Speaker 1 And so the other thought that I had was get Jeff two monocles. And he puts one in each eye and you walk around with two monocles.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 You know, Colonel Clank had one. You get two.
I remember.

Speaker 1 And then when you're one of the rooms. And then when you're in a meeting with me and you're surprised by something like, Conan stole that much from the budget, your eyes widen and they both fall out.

Speaker 1 That would be funny. One at a time, maybe.
Yeah. One and then the other.
Well, when something's quizzical or skeptical, one falls out. One falls out, yeah.
But you meant to keep the other.

Speaker 1 Anyway, these are just ideas you should think about. I appreciate that.
And it's weird for me, too.

Speaker 1 Would you like to maybe quickly review me since you and I, you're the only person that can, you're only alone that has the authority. How am I doing, Jeff? You're doing great.
We're still working.

Speaker 1 Wow. We're still going.
We're still going.

Speaker 2 I have a few notes.

Speaker 1 We can feed you a few notes.

Speaker 1 You don't have notes. I've been riding this gravy train for 31 years.

Speaker 1 Okay? Jeff. If you think I'm going to start giving you notes,

Speaker 1 Jeff is

Speaker 1 Jeff's sitting on top of the caboose of the gravy train.

Speaker 1 Well, Jeff,

Speaker 1 other than the glasses, and get that shit straightened away. I will.
A-plus all the way.

Speaker 1 You're doing what you're doing. Thank you.

Speaker 1 And I thought this was pretty painless. Yeah.
Totally painless. All right.
Four skin on the table.

Speaker 1 Come on.

Speaker 1 Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend with Conan O'Brien, Sonom Obsession, and Matt Gorley. Produced by me, Matt Gorley.
Executive produced by Adam Sachs, Jeff Frost, and Nick Liao.

Speaker 1 Theme song by The White Stripes. Incidental music by Jimmy Vivino.
Take it away, Jimmy.

Speaker 1 Our supervising producer is Aaron Blair, and our associate talent producer is Jennifer Samples. Engineering and Mixing by Eduardo Perez and Brendan Burns.

Speaker 1 Additional production support by Mars Melnick. Talent booking by Paula Davis, Gina Batista, and Britt Kahn.

Speaker 1 You can rate and review this show on Apple Podcasts, and you might find your review read on a future episode. Got a question for Conan? Call the Team Cocoa Hotline at 669-587-2847 and leave a message.

Speaker 1 It too could be featured on a future episode. You can also get three free months of SiriusXM when you sign up at seriousxm.com/slash Conan.

Speaker 1 And if you haven't already, please subscribe to Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend wherever fine podcasts are downloaded.

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