Spinal Tap Live From The SiriusXM Garage

Hey, Conan O'Brien here.

We're trying a little something different on this episode because it's a very special episode.

We're going to start out with fans, people who are here in the audience, telling you how they feel about being Conan O'Brien's friend.

But let's see what's on people's minds.

Hi, my name is Eric D.

And I feel wistful about being Conan O'Brien's friend.

My name is Rebecca, and I feel vengeful.

I feel elated, overeager, so-so.

Nervous.

Wactose intolerant.

Unprepared.

Cautiously optimistic.

I feel fine.

Honored.

Ginger chic.

Fantastic.

Swell.

Fabulous.

Stupendous.

Unoriginal.

Special.

Vertically challenged.

Shocked.

Convinced.

Short as fuck.

Crepuscular.

Sneaky.

Silly.

Choice.

Stoked.

In awe.

Anxious.

Electric.

Stunned.

Unworthy.

Shaking.

Nostalgic.

Suspicious.

Terbalake.

Committed.

Felice.

Rasm tails.

Lucky.

Thankful.

Flaccid.

Mental.

Effusive.

Kosher.

Apprehensive.

Nuts.

Blessed.

Ecstatic.

Aroused.

Feeling excited.

Everything.

Rad as.

Hi, my name's Amanda, and I feel frog about being Conan O'Brien's friend.

Hey!

Thank you!

Thank you very much.

Please, please, please.

Don't chant the conan.

It sounds like a Salem witch trial.

Very nice to see you.

A gentleman tried to high-five me, fist bump on the way in.

I don't do well with those.

Do you, if you saw me on the street, would you hold up your hand?

I don't.

I never make a good connection.

I'm usually holding something.

I apologize to that gentleman, but those frighten me.

All right.

Also, that can be confused for a fascist salute,

which would have been funny five years ago, but now it's getting scary.

how y'all doing you ready to go all right

this guy over here grew the beard that I had about eight years ago fantastic very that's my beard man I want it back how are you how long did it take you to grow that

six hours wow you're just infused with testosterone mine took nine years I mean I sneezed and it fell off.

This is a very special show that we have today.

These guys are my heroes.

I will time travel with you to 1984.

I'm an incredible comedy nerd.

I'm in Cambridge, Massachusetts.

And one of my friends says, I believe it was Mark Silber, said, hey, let's go see Spinal Tap.

It just came out.

I hear it's funny.

I said, what is that?

He said, you never seem to know anything.

Your career will flounder.

And we took the tea over to a theater, and we saw Spinal Tap, and it opened so many doors in my mind to what was possible in comedy.

And I just saw you wearing the Conan shirt.

You look lovely.

How are you?

Okay, all right.

How are you?

Nice to see you.

I used to go, wow, and I go, oh,

like a cat with leukemia.

Sorry, dark image, but it happens.

It happens all the time.

Okay, that was nothing.

My point is that that movie meant so much to me.

And if you had told that guy, I'm very, I'm not at all jaded.

I'm very sentimental, and I have a very good contact with the young Conan of 1984, and I'm able to access that guy, and he's freaking out right now because he's going to hang out with the people who changed his life all those years ago.

So that's awesome for me, and it's nice that you're all here to take part in that.

I think we're going to have a very good time.

Blay, Spinal Tap, guys, they mean anything to you.

I know you're very young.

I mean, when I say young, you're like in your late 50s

iconic i'm so excited okay very good you've been working on that answer all day

he was riding in his car iconic i'm so excited iconic i'm so excited iconic excited me i am uh we're gonna have a good time we're gonna have a great time i've been looking forward to this show for a while look there are times i'm talking to a guest and i absolutely loathe them and i think you could tell oliphant uh i mean people i despise i think you just saw that when you talked it to talk to me yeah yeah well no we've never done it you've never been on the guest on the podcast

and for good reason

You and I are oil and water in the best way.

We make a good salad dressing.

I think we should get the show started.

Thank you all very much for being here.

You're a big part of this show, and we're going to have a good time.

But really, there is no Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend without two of my good friends.

And I say that in quotes

because I want to create some emotional detachment from them: Sona Movsesian and Matt Gore.

Let's get them in here.

Yay, up.

It's a very long corridor to get from backstage to this.

It's a strange setup here at Sirius XM and LA.

And so, what happens is what people are hearing at home is a sustained applause, like our screening of our movie at the Venice Film Festival just aired.

Oh, like a test.

And it's getting a nine-minute approach because that's people very graciously applauding and cheering after we've been announced, but then 10 minutes of us walking and avoiding high fibers.

I see you, you son of a bitch

in the hallway.

It's this long walk, and that creates the audio illusion for the people listening at home that you guys got that long sustained applause.

We were right outside the door when you called us.

Yeah, we were.

And we walked in, and they just wouldn't see you.

I announced you, and I have access to your app.

You called an Uber.

You called an Uber as I announced you.

You have access to my app?

I have access to all your apps.

You pervert.

I have access to your apps, and that's true.

Do you know that

I can't post on social media?

I'm not allowed to.

I'm like Ronald Reagan with the nuclear codes.

They won't let me near

any way that I could possibly start riffing spontaneously online.

And so, Sona, I would have to call you.

Yeah, that's true.

If I want to order a hamburger on Grubhub,

not a sponsor,

I would have to call you.

I do that with my wife, too.

I'm like, can you order the pizza that's next door?

I do, my email is attached to your Uber and the food delivery services.

So every time you order something or an Uber, it pops up and I know exactly where you're going.

Right.

I know exactly what you're eating.

Yeah, so we have some questions about some places you've been going.

I didn't know Hooters delivered.

I was just stunned.

Wait, Stacey's a wonderful lady.

Stacy with an eye, and it's a little heart.

She comes and delivers it, and we just chat about, you know, how the Berlin Wall fell, and it's just

all kinds of fascinating stuff.

Yeah.

We have some interesting facts about this audience.

Do you know that some of them come from far and wide, to be honest?

I would hope so.

But of all the shows we've done, this is going to be up there with one of the most important ones.

I think so when you hear this, not not only Toronto, where are you?

Awkward.

Oh, that is so awkward.

Maybe they didn't make it here.

Awkward.

Wait, who gave you this information?

I think it's just.

You don't need the mic, wait.

You know what?

I love that your mic doesn't speak.

You don't need it, though.

That's what I'm talking about.

Yeah, Mike, you don't need your mic.

Just speak.

You don't have to speak.

You're so close to the microphone.

Wait, if anything, could you step out of the room and just talk in a whisper?

We'll still hear you.

Like, you're the loudest person we know, and you're in a small room.

Into your mouth.

Maybe just Canada.

I thought it was Toronto, but maybe just Canada.

Canada!

No, maybe

I just saw it.

I don't know.

So

California.

Okay.

Wait a minute.

Well, Blai,

you came to us all giddy and you said, I've got some info.

It's going to be rocket fuel for the top of the show.

We've got someone from Toronto.

We don't have anyone from Toronto.

There's other places.

There's other places.

Oh, there is someone outside.

Oh, it's high five McGee.

Yeah, okay.

But that's not all.

But that's not all.

Yes.

Mexico.

Oh,

my God.

Oh, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.

Wow.

And then very reluctantly raised his hand.

I know.

You are welcome here.

We're happy to have you.

Yes.

Oh, la como está.

Please let this one be real.

New Zealand?

Wow.

There we go.

Just for the show.

No, no.

Can I tell you something?

People say, when they see a guy like Blay, they say, I came all the way just for the show.

But whenever I question these people for more than two seconds, it's, well, of course, I'm getting a heart replaced while I'm here at Cedar Sinai, and I had an extra hour.

So, were you here just for the show?

Be honest.

Yes!

I knew it!

Whenever someone says, just for the show, it's not true.

No one, and first of all, I don't blame you, sir, although I'm going to ask you to leave.

It's just what happened.

Blair, you like cable news.

Guys, I'm sorry.

You get excited.

You get very loud.

And you get very excited.

And then your information is over.

I've been here.

I've been here for two and a half months.

I've been here for two and a half months.

I've been here for two.

I'm not making fun of you.

I'm trying to.

How is this not making fun of you?

I'm not making fun of you.

By the way, I'm just making fun of her.

I'm a student in accents.

This is what I do.

Yes,

this podcast isn't my real job.

Could you do Australian, then do New Zealand?

Okay, so Australia means like putting all the shrimp in the Barbie.

Pack the car in the car park, man.

Oh, that's someone that's at the dentist's head.

Pack the car in the car pack.

That's someone with a terrible facial wound.

Pack the car in the car pack.

That's John F.

Kennedy.

Yeah.

Pack the car in the car pack.

Okay, stop it.

You know what I love?

You're my assistant.

I hired you as my assistant, and now you're out here doing 10 minutes of impressions.

I honest to God don't know what's happened.

Oh, you want French?

Oh, give us your French guy.

Oh, the French is very easy.

That's pretty good.

French is very easy.

It's unbelievable.

I hired her to help with correspondence.

Get me into the DMV and out.

Yeah.

And no, now you're doing this.

Balloon animals.

Do you do balloon animals?

You would.

I mean, you got to.

Should I do a yes and?

Yes, and I do balloon animals.

And I do face paintings.

That's good improv.

Should I do yes and

welcome to the unconfident improv troupe.

Yes.

Welcome to my candy shop.

Should I do yes, and yes, and yes, and I wasn't making fun of you, I promise.

I love, I feel like I'm just like becoming an accent expert.

So that's why I was just doing this.

And she did nail you because that's, you know, you did.

I've been here.

You went, I've been here.

I've been here.

Well, you're welcome, and I hope that the business that you're doing here is productive.

You've been here a long time, and then you, I guess, found this ticket on the street.

I love up front, you created this.

People have come from all over the world.

Got to, I don't know, I was in Glendale and

getting my car washed next door here in mid-central Hollywood.

What do you say?

Should we get going?

I think it's time.

It's very exciting.

Let's do this.

Let's do this.

All right, we are very excited.

This is really happening.

My guests today are absolute legends of rock and roll and known as one of England's loudest bands.

Their new documentary, Spinal Tap 2: The End Continues, such a great title, is in theater September 12th.

I am very honored that they are here today.

These gentlemen changed my life.

I think they changed many of the lives of people here.

Please welcome filmmaker Marty DeBergey and members of Spinal Tap, Nigel Tufnell, Derek Smalls, and David St.

Hubbins.

Thank you.

Hello.

We are Spinal Tap.

Yep.

And we feel what do we feel?

About what?

About

being Conan O'Brien's friend.

Mixed, right?

Very mixed.

Very mixed.

Mixed.

Marty?

Marty.

Mixed.

Well, I'm very happy to be Conan's friend.

Well, that's my friend.

With anybody to be my friend, and I can be yours.

It's not a two-way street.

Oh.

Yeah, I hate to break it.

It's not even a street.

You look so much smarter with the glasses.

Oh, thank you.

I like the glasses, huh?

Isn't that nice?

It's smarter, too.

Well, you're sitting down.

I'm going to go with mixed.

You feel mixed because we don't know what's going to happen to you.

One of us, you know, no one's up in the air.

We're all the same, and yet we're all completely different.

Let me begin by telling you it's an honor to have you here.

It really is.

And I made this very clear to my audience before you came out.

I saw your original film, This is Spinal Tap,

a documentary made by the great Mari Dibergi in 1984, and it changed my life.

I was not aware of your band.

In what way did it change your life?

life?

For the worse.

It changed it for the worse.

I went into a long depression.

You had to have an open wound before this film.

You make you taller.

I came out during the second, I think, the second Obama administration.

I recovered myself.

But

deep depression.

But it really did, in so many ways, it introduced me to your work that I was not aware of.

I hate to say that, but I really wasn't.

I just missed.

No, no, no.

But you said it.

What's that?

But you said it.

I know, I did say it, and

it was wrong to say it, and I apologize.

I just was unaware.

I won't use the term niche, but somehow your oeuvre had escaped me.

And then Marty did this incredible thing.

He brought you to my attention.

And Marty, this has been 41 years since the original.

Yes.

And I must say that this is the first time that I've ever been allowed to be on a stage with these gentlemen who I've admired for so many years.

I was always a big fan, and I've never been allowed to be on the stage with them.

You haven't drawn thin ice right now.

You can keep that up, and it would be the last time.

It doesn't feel like it's going well so far, but I think you will acquit yourself well, Marty.

Marty, I hate to bring this up, but one of the reasons that you got involved in this project is that you have struggled since you made the original This Is Spinal Tap in 1984.

You have struggled greatly.

You

have had difficulty finding.

Well, I was hoping that when I made this Spinal Tap, which, by the way,

the members of the band were not too thrilled when they saw it.

They called it a hatchet job, and they were not happy with how they were portrayed.

I thought it was a loving portrayal, but I guess

they felt differently.

But I was hoping that it would

basically boost my career, give me an opportunity to do like a Hollywood feature, which I was able, I finally was able to do.

They did

a sequel to a very

important feature film that won an Academy Award.

It was called Kramer vs.

Kramer with Meryl Streep and Dustin Hoffman.

And I did the sequel, which was Kramer vs.

Kramer vs.

Godzilla.

And it didn't do as well as I had hoped.

Eye concept.

And it it sent me into a tailspin, and I left the business for a while, and

I went to a retreat, a retreat, which was the guru there was a gentleman by the name of Baba Ramdas boat.

And

I was trying to find myself, and one morning I was drinking my spirulina smoothie, and I noticed in Deadline Hollywood that they were

thinking of getting back that there was going to be another concert.

We were forced into it.

There was a contract that was left dangling.

The death of Ian Fay.

This was not born of inspiration.

I have to say, as many reasons are

that you were contractually forced to get back together again, as is made clear in the new documentary.

Induced.

Induced.

You were induced.

It was an induced pregnancy.

It's an induction, yes.

It's an induction.

And

I'm glad that you did get back together.

You brought so much joy to hundreds of people.

It gave us an opportunity.

It did give us an opportunity to get back together again and break up again and then get back together again.

I think we broke up once more since then.

And now here we are.

So third time on the 9th century.

Did we change seats at any point?

You're actually fine there.

We've talked about that format.

It's called it.

I wouldn't call it a format, exactly.

It's more like just seats.

Freemat.

Okay.

Trying to put a nice gloss on what you had said.

Okay.

I want to ask you something, Nigel.

I was very surprised when I saw the dogmar what you've been up to.

You own a shop?

I do, yes.

A cheese shop.

Well, not just cheese.

Not just cheese, no, cheese and guitars.

And it's fascinating.

You see this in the film.

Someone comes in, and I thought you could buy cheese or buy guitars, but you can trade cheese for guitars

or trade guitars for cheese.

Yes.

It's a barter system like they had back in the prehistoric times, you know, when there were dinosaurs, people would say, no, no.

Dinosaurs and

dinosaurs and people

kind of things.

They would trade things.

So I say someone comes in with a nice brie,

and I'll say maybe a flying V for the brie.

Yeah.

But But we have to see.

I've got to weigh it literally and then play the guitar and vice versa as well.

Yeah.

Yeah,

I saw that you were doing that business and I thought, sometimes you see a business and you think, why didn't anyone else think of this?

I didn't have that thought.

Interesting.

Yeah.

No, it's very perfect for me.

Have you turned a profit yet?

In what sense?

Monetary.

In a barter sense.

No, there's no admirer, but he lives in a world of his own.

Um, David, what have you been up to?

Bring us up to date because I don't want to spoil, don't do too many spoilers, but no, it is revealed in the documentary.

You've been living in Morrow Bay, Morrow Bay, California.

Anyone here from Morrow Bay?

No, never, really.

Toronto, people often do that too.

Oh, they're all Toronto, yeah, yeah, clearly, except for the one New Zealander.

That's right, yeah,

uh, yeah, well, I've been staying busy, you know, I'm a bit of a bit of a star at in Morrow Bay.

There's not a lot of

famous people there.

They're all retired English musicians, all the famous ones.

And I happen to be number six or seven.

But I'm having a really nice...

I love it.

I'm a total Californian now.

And I play a little bit of music on the side.

Yeah, tell us about your music career because you've managed to stay in the audio business.

But in a way that surprised me.

Well, listen,

I've got fairly proficient on the keyboards.

And of course, all you need is about four or five keys and a computer, you know, and just pluck it out like this.

And I do a lot of scores for podcasts, crime podcasts.

And it's very rewarding.

Yes, I was, you also record hold music, is that correct?

Yes, oh, yeah, yeah.

The music you get when you call up, that's not just pulled out of the sky, you know, someone has to do that.

And I'm able to express sort of my inner middle of the road, if you will.

It's not hard rock.

It's not quite Dixieland.

It's somewhere in between.

What's in between hard rock and Dixieland?

I don't know, but you did win an award for that.

I want a holdie.

I did.

Yeah.

I did.

Very proud.

Very proud.

And also,

I know maybe you don't want to, you know,

put a light on it, but you do still play with a band, I noticed.

There's a bunch of blokes I'll get together with, yeah, yeah.

And I've really got heavy into mariachi music.

And I've been writing tunes,

actually some of them are traditional tunes, but I've been translating harder, more demonic lyrics into

Spanish

with the help of Maria.

Maria is my live-in chef, and she helps me with the lyrics.

And it's really fun.

It's lovely.

again something I

when I saw it I thought this is not something I'd have thought of and or if I had thought of I might have dismissed it immediately but incredible and it's incredible it feels good on the from the inside yeah put it that way Derek

you're pointing at me now yes yeah passed me to you yes yeah he also said your name so yeah I thought that

woke me right up I thought I thought the name was

the main indicator not the pointing but that's a bonus okay you get both.

You get the pointing and the name, Derek.

You've confounded me instantly.

You run a shop that sells

glue.

No, it's not a shop.

There's no profit.

It is the

same business as the cheese are.

I kind of zing you there.

Sorry, man.

No, it's okay, but here's a different situation.

Yeah, mine's deliberate.

Okay.

People would say to me over the years, you know, and not just me, but bass players generally, well, you guys are kind of the glue, you know, that hold the band together because these other guys are, you know, up there.

Unglued.

Unglued.

And one day I just thought, glue.

You don't think about glue all that often.

Never.

I hardly ever think about it.

Well, I did.

And I became, I guess you'd say, fixated.

Well, you wouldn't, but I'd say fixated.

Yeah.

And I've opened a museum of clue.

It's a museum, that's right.

Oh, some museums are for-profit, so I think I redeemed myself there.

But we should move on.

I think I'm getting into a little bit of a conversational cul-de-sac, if you will.

Yes?

No.

I'm just wondering why you're here.

Yeah.

Good question, really.

I'm feeling feeling that way myself.

Gentlemen,

it has to sting that the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame has refused to induct you.

You have such a body of work.

There's a lot of it of what you do.

People can debate the quality, but there's a lot of it.

There's a tremendous amount of what you did.

And you have to admit, Marty,

it's a shock.

And the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame did not just pass on them.

They sort of stepped outside their lane a little bit.

Yeah, I think they said they,

you know, they made a letter,

and the letter came back, go fuck yourself.

So, unusual in so many ways.

It was a little harsh.

That's not Hall of Fame language.

No, no, no, no.

No, it's just terrible.

You know, it was, and they rarely send a letter like that.

They have Millie Vanilli, I think, got one.

Millie Vanilli, yeah.

They got two.

They got two.

Yeah, very nice.

Millie and Vanilli.

Yes.

But here's the irony.

Are you pointing at me?

I am pointing at you.

I'm pointing at you.

But I thank you.

I didn't say your name.

You don't know my name.

I do.

It's that Spider-Man meme.

A bit frightening to be in the middle of it, to be honest.

The rock and roll Hall of Fame will not admit us, but in the gift shop they sell Hello Cleveland t-shirts.

It's true, yeah.

It's not right.

It's not right.

And you should, I hope you're getting a taste of that.

No.

You're not getting a taste?

No.

Well, I'm getting a taste, but that's a different thing.

I just said.

She tastes like burnt toast.

That's a stroke symptom.

I just want you to know.

No, no, no, no.

No.

Oh, you didn't like a doctor, I suppose.

Well,

I've watched enough television.

Yeah.

I feel I can diagnose anyone.

Where do they hide the cameras?

I'm a little bit confused.

They're all filters.

That's a camera right there.

Every person must have one.

Yeah, so

there's one right there.

Especially the New Zealander.

Yeah, yeah.

Can't trust that.

Where in New Zealand are you from?

I'm from Auckland.

Of course.

Auckland, really?

I was there, yeah.

Yeah, that's a lovely time.

Have you guys played Auckland?

Yeah, we did a thing there.

I can't remember what it was, though.

These are terrific stories.

No, no, no, no.

I don't want to embarrass you.

Can you stand up?

Not literally, but can you.

Where are you?

There we are.

Oh, yeah.

This is another stroke simple.

I didn't meet you there.

No.

You look familiar from not meeting you there.

Gentlemen,

let's address a very dark subject.

You've lost countless drummers.

How many, Marty, has it been?

Well, according to the band, I think it's 12.

Yeah.

I think it's 12.

The last dozen.

Even dozen.

Yeah, an even dozen.

And this latest film, and I'm not going to give anything away, but it begins with you looking for a new drummer.

Why not just use a drum machine?

It died.

Lugged it in.

Ten bars into the tune, and then it went, nope, I'm out.

Fizzled.

Yeah,

just left this burn mark.

Yeah, that's incredible.

All right.

Well,

I don't think it's giving anything away from the film, but if you want,

what happened to the last drummer that you had?

Skippy Scuffleton.

Oh, God, poor Skiff.

Yeah, Skippy Skippy Scuffleton or Scuffy Skippleton or Skiffy Scuffleton.

We never could get it straight.

He had some entirely different name that he got paid through.

But

he had a terrible anergy to something.

I thought it was the little berries inside the maracas that make the seeds.

I think he was allergic because he'd never used them before.

And he played about half the day and then he said, I'm feeling funny.

He started sneezing and he never stopped until it all stopped.

So it was pretty sad.

He sneezed himself to death.

Is that the actual coroner's report that he sneezed?

No, there's a Latin term for that.

It's a real thing.

Any Latins in?

No.

What was the Latin term for

sneezing yourself to death?

I don't know, but there is one because it's a medical death.

Well, you know there's a German one.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, Gesunteit.

Yeah, there you go.

I was, I mean, it's so much to catch up on with you guys because, again, it's been, I know you've had your reunions,

but 41 years since the last film.

Can I ask you why you keep putting on and taking off your glasses?

I like to create different looks throughout the podcast.

Yes, too.

I have found it best, especially in an audio

medium.

Yes.

In an audio medium, it's good to have two looks as opposed to one.

No, I'm quite interested in that.

And you know, can I just

have you ever thought of a hat?

I have thought of a hat, but that would obscure the hair, which is the trademark.

You really think about it.

Well, contact lenses.

Imagine taking out your contact lenses to make a point.

Yeah.

See here, Senator.

That would be tough.

Yeah, very difficult.

How dare you, sir.

But

I am able to do this in an interview is whip the moss.

Isn't that incredible?

It wasn't being critical.

I thought.

Yeah, it came across as critical.

Oh, look, you're so sensitive to that.

That's why people like you, though.

Yeah.

No, it's true.

It's true.

I have to ask you, because I'm a bit bit of a guitar enthusiast myself.

I'm pointing to you.

Okay.

Everyone pointing to you.

I've noticed that, Nigel, you have no peripheral vision.

None.

You couldn't see a camera that's right there, and you have no idea where I am right now.

Well, I do.

I could pinpoint it if you gave me a compass.

Has it hurt you in rock and roll to have no peripheral vision?

No.

No, I do have.

I can see this.

I can see this.

So I do.

I was just being cheeky.

That was your question.

I don't remember.

You have a guitar that I absolutely adore.

It's a guitar that's beautiful.

It has the Union Jack on it.

But if you turn the guitar over, and this is featured in the film,

I don't want to give it away.

Well, you have, but go ahead.

I haven't said what it is.

There's a secret compartment in the guitar.

I adore this guitar.

You have to see the film to see this guitar.

It's wonderful.

Is that available for purchase?

Could I buy one?

Or is there only one and is it yours?

They made one.

Yeah.

It's just mine.

Okay.

I'm getting the feeling you want me to give it to you, though.

I'm glad you brought that up.

No, it's a dungeon.

Yes.

It's a wonderful guitar, yeah.

I have many, many guitars, and that's one of the really good ones, yeah.

You did invent that, though.

You did.

I did, yeah,

I came up with the idea for it, and they built it for me.

Some of your inventions are great.

I have other inventions, yes, which have not been as successful.

No.

Finger bowls for dogs.

That was never going to happen.

Well, I had this folding wine glass, you see.

True, yeah.

Because I thought

if you're going on a picnic and you don't want to carry things, you know, you want to just throw everything in, the glass folded in on four sides.

Yeah.

So it had hinges on all the sides.

Were they completely waterproof?

No.

So, what would happen?

If you're pouring, let's say, a Beaujolais or whatever, it doesn't really matter.

It could be a medoc or whatever, you know, 81, it could be a whatever it is, Chatonuft de Pat, it could be any number of just two more, just two more, please.

Just a few more, yeah.

And you pour it in, and it just would leak out the bottom.

Yeah, so by the time you raise it to your lips,

your crotch was soaked in wine.

Yeah,

that was that one,

you know.

know, Marty, I want to bring you back in because there are some moments in the documentary, and I don't care if I'm giving anything away in the new one, but I was stunned.

At one point, the lads, I'll call you the lads,

even though

you all served bravely in the Korean War.

I want to say, settle down.

I want to say I was stunned when Sir Paul McCartney enters their rehearsal space and starts jamming with them.

It was, I mean, even as a viewer, as someone who's met McCartney and myself countless times, probably more than you guys have, and spent a lot of quality time with him,

I was,

I mean, he's on my speed dial.

We talk three times a day.

But my point is, it was such a stunning moment.

And

he is the

royalty of rock.

He enters the room.

And I'm going to say this right now, David.

I didn't think you were.

I didn't think you were kind to him initially.

You seemed a little.

Well, you know, that's a two-way street.

I mean,

we all have this picture of Paul, and he's the cute beetle, and all that.

You know,

let's not go nuts here.

I mean, he's just a person, you know.

And he comes in, and he's throwing his weight around.

I'm not going to tell you what it is.

It was difficult for me because I'm a creative person, he's a creative person, but that doesn't mean we're going to be on the same page.

We were stunned, tell you the truth, when he came into the room.

And

as he went through through his whatever he was doing it struck me odd that he never mentioned your name

i know

you'd think

he never brought up coroner o'brien one time

no that's odd i'll talk about that with paul when i see him

we usually meet for flan

in west hollywood around this he didn't mention any o'brien okay i have a fear of flan really okay

that will be expunged don't trust it you will not trust it that will be edited out the fear Furifon.

We won't have words to do.

It's better if people don't know it.

But, Marty, you were there when this amazing meeting of the rock gods happened, and you knew to keep the cameras rolling.

Well, of course.

And then, were you at all stunned that David was

Paul offered one hint for a bridge on the song, and David was less than gracious to Sir Paul McCartney?

How did you feel about that moment?

Well, you know, as

I see, I put David on the same level as Paul McCartney.

That's very true.

To me,

and from one musician, I don't take sides on this, and from one musician to another, he was basically denigrating

what David was putting forth.

Now, in all fairness, so was Nigel and so was Derek.

They both hated what he was doing.

So it was kind of three against one.

But I mean, I...

that's the great flaw in a democracy, isn't it?

What?

I think I've jumped ahead.

But trust me, you'll catch that.

And

Nigel, Sir Elton John,

joining you guys and revealing that he's a fan and has been a fan?

Yes.

Well, you know, it works both ways, as he says.

He's a very sensitive chap.

You know, I've known him since we were kids.

He's very sensitive.

So the thing with Sir Paul, I wasn't surprised at that because he reacts like that sometimes.

With Sir Elton, two sirs, amazing, you know, it was just he was so open to playing with us.

It was great.

It was really fantastic, I thought.

Two sirs, no madam.

Yeah, nice, very nice.

Again, I'm going to end all wordplay now.

There'll be no more wordplay.

This, I think there's going to be one more before we go.

I won't say again, I don't want to spoil anything.

I hope you've mended fences with Elton.

Oh, yeah, oh, no, no, yeah,

some things happen, and you're going to have to see this for yourself.

You know, I meant to ask you that, you know, afterwards.

Did they ever sue?

Was there any lawsuits?

No, I didn't know.

No.

No.

Wouldn't he have sued you as well?

Probably.

Yeah.

Well, I've got no news for you.

This is as of an hour ago, you've all been served.

You are being sued.

Oh.

Yeah.

And it's a figure that's.

Well, it won't matter much, will it?

What is that?

What was that?

What are they going to take?

No.

Sir Elton John is taking possession of your cheese and guitar shop.

I've been told.

I don't think so.

I don't think so.

The people in the village where I live with my

girlfriend,

how come you put quotes around girlfriend?

Yeah, why did you put quotes around girlfriend?

That's for me to know, isn't it?

She's great.

She's exactly what you've needed all along.

Yes, really, it's true.

She's a lovely girl.

No, but it's a cheese shop.

The people in the village love it.

They wouldn't allow that to be taken away, boarded up, or anything.

Well, I don't know.

It would not happen.

The town loves Elton John, and they're thrilled that he's taken away.

Well, you've never been to the town, so you don't know that.

You're just reading what I know.

I read the local.

Reading what you don't know is what you're doing.

All right, well, if we're going to, this is getting contentious and I'm uncomfortable, and I feel a little bit like Paul McCartney sitting in the spinal tap.

Unwelcome.

Gentlemen,

there's so many more questions I have for you.

One is:

you two fellows grew up together in Squatney, I believe.

Squatney, yeah, East End of London.

East End.

I've never heard of Squatney.

Well, it's gone.

It's gone now.

How could it be gone?

Well, most waste.

Because most of it's been replaced by a Tesco's.

Oh, okay.

It's a Huge supermarket.

Every city has areas that change or renamed.

You know this.

Yes, but when you said it was gone, I just...

Well, it's gone in the sense.

It's not, we can go to the street where we were, but it's not called that anymore.

They incorporate other things and then they have a new name or whatever they think.

The pub that we used to go to, the Queen's Lips, not there.

It's gone.

Now it's an Apple store.

Yeah.

It's just

a change.

It was a working-class neighborhood.

Yeah, lovely.

Has there any, if you go to Liverpool, you will see literal statues of the Beatles everywhere everywhere you go.

Is it like that if you go to Squatney?

I mean,

you are heroes in Squatney.

Is there any memorial?

And Marty, do you think there should be in Squatney?

Well, of course there should be.

But as they say, they've changed this place so much.

I don't know that the young people of today would even know

what those statues represented.

I don't think I would know.

If you saw a statue to yourself, you wouldn't recognize that statue.

Have you ever seen the statue of Lucille Ball in her hometown?

Yes.

You've seen that, right?

Yeah.

We don't want that.

No, no.

Well, they wouldn't put a statue of Lucille Ball there.

They'd put a statue of you there.

They'd put a statue of Lucille Ball before.

They'd put one of us.

Yeah.

I think that's a fair point.

Derek,

this,

what a journey for you to go from being the psychonic rock star to having a glue museum, a non-for-profit glue museum.

And when you got the call call that this was happening, you were getting back together with the band.

Explain your emotional roller coaster.

Not so much a roller coaster as a merry-ground.

So still a wheel, but turning and it just turns out.

Turning in a horizontal direction as opposed to a vertical direction.

Okay, all right.

Okay, that's a good differentiation.

Thank you.

You know, I didn't just have the glue museum.

I was doing some telework and commercials and adverts, things like that.

But you also played with the symphony orchestra.

I did some of that, yeah.

But I was promoting a crypto

product called Bruegelcoin.

Bruegelcoin, yeah.

But I was happy to join the lads.

In theory.

In theory.

Yeah.

It's been bumpy since.

It's been a long time.

It's 15 years since we spoke.

Yeah.

In between.

But I kind of like the bumps.

What was that noise?

Please, they're doing other podcasts, very popular ones all around us.

Huge rock bands.

Gentlemen,

the mind boggles at the journeys that you have taken in rock and roll.

Financially, how are you doing?

Oh, I get by.

My friend, Maria, I mentioned her before,

my live-in chef,

and a significant other,

she does marvelously well on the catering circuit in the central coast.

And so I don't have to worry about a thing, really.

I do all these other musical things.

They pay some of the rent and all this.

And like I say, I enjoy a certain amount of

new to you because she wasn't there when I first visited her.

Oh, dear.

On and off, on and off for six or seven years, yeah.

You know, you might meet her one day.

First time hearing about it, right?

Yeah.

No, I think financially, you know,

the shop seriously does get by, the cheese shop.

We do make enough.

We have a small house just outside the village.

And uh I'll get some residuals, as you'd call them here, royalties and things for music that we do.

So I still get and I play in the pub.

I'm playing in a pub with a group, which is

that doesn't pay at all, actually.

Well, this I guess the point I'm making, and I I don't want to tread on a sensitive area or be in any way um cruel or rude, um but I'm just going to go for this.

You guys are in an iconic rock band.

If you look at other rock bands from your era, I mean, Rolling Stones,

Beatles, I mean, anyone involved in those groups is fantastically rich.

We're talking about billionaires.

Billionaires.

In some cases,

Paul Revere and the Raiders.

Huge.

Rolling in it?

Yeah.

No, no, no.

No, no, no.

There are lots of people that didn't make a lot of money.

Lots of people.

Most people didn't make a lot of money.

The famous ones, the ones you mentioned, obviously did.

But there are lots and lots of people, hundreds of bands who played that were famous for a minute or two.

Nothing.

They have nothing.

Freddie and the Dreamers, for example.

Again, I have the facts on my fingertips.

Freddy and the Dreamers.

I just started the Forbes 500 last year.

No, you don't.

That's hugely, hugely, hugely successful.

You don't make fun of Freddie and the Dreamers anymore.

No,

or Jerry and the Pacebank.

I have to be honest with you.

That's one of the reasons I rejoined the band was financial difficulties.

Thank you for being honest.

Thank you for noticing it.

I had been, as I told you, promoting this cryptocurrency.

Yes, yes.

And they paid me in cryptocurrency.

Yeah.

When they went under, I went under.

Yes, yeah.

So you have less than nothing.

I have

working my way back to nothing.

You also, Derek,

I remember, we didn't talk about it, but I think you also tried to start an amusement park, a tapland, like

Dollywood.

Didn't you try to get them to make an amusement park-themed park based on TAP?

I thought about it.

Well, you did think about it because you asked us the money.

Well, yeah, and we sent you a message.

I thought about that.

We sent you money.

We sent you money.

You sent him money.

Yes, you sent him money.

And where did this money go?

When you got the money from Nigel, what did you do with the money?

Built the glue museum.

They don't grow on trees, you know.

Well, rubber trees.

Yeah, rubber tree actually comes from the tree.

It's a terrible example.

What's the difference between glue, since I'm sitting with an expert, between glue and mucilage?

Mucilage is got animal fat.

Ah, very good.

Thank you.

What about epoxy?

Now, some people think I'm taking us into a very dry area.

But you've got to wait for it to dry.

Yeah.

Okay.

That is it.

That is it.

We're not having any more work.

right?

Don't apply that.

We're not having it.

What do you mean, some people think?

I just think there's probably a discerning person in the audience.

Epoxy, epoxy, which I use on a daily basis, by the way.

Epoxy.

This is not an advert.

Completely different animal than what he does.

Completely different thing.

It's a scientific thing that has no organic

elements at all.

What do you mean you use it on a daily basis?

What do you do with it on a daily basis?

Oh, what are you?

Iron sides or something?

What is this?

Iron sides?

Money, how is that?

Oh, I'm a detective.

I'm going to find out what he's going to do.

What is that all about?

It's the last time you watch television.

I'm just curious.

I don't have televisions.

I don't have a television.

Well, I have to tell you, no one's referenced Iron Sides, the TV show starring Raymond Burr, in over 47 years.

And that's my fault.

Yeah.

Well, okay.

Look.

I liked it when it was out in the 70s.

We'd get them after you had to hear.

Yeah.

What was the name of the bloke who pushed him around?

That's all I recall.

There was someone

pushing him around.

I love.

I'm getting into some areas I didn't think would get into.

Who pushed Ironsides around on the original series?

And that's something for.

If one of you can answer that, well, just keep it to yourself, remind me.

Basically.

Well, did you have, you've now come back together again?

And I know there's some difficulties that are well discussed and well chronicled in the documentary.

Do you feel enthusiastic about the future of TAP?

Oh, well, it's two different things, the future and tap.

The future of TAP is one thing.

No, no, I see.

What happens to you guys in the future?

It's a value wordplay right there.

Okay, listen.

It's not one ever point in the world.

And it's also

individual opinions on that as well.

Well, are you enthusiastic about the future of TAP?

I'm positive generally and think it might be possible to regroup again.

Yeah, it's possible.

Wide open.

Listen, whatever works.

Possible.

Okay.

Wow, that's a very, this is a nice end of the year.

Inzioutsi.

Yeah.

Depending on maybe your financial

thing.

Or if we called him Inzi Auti,

and if you did reunite, do you think there's another film there?

Go to hell.

It's as good a place to end as any.

Gentlemen,

I'll say it again.

I saw the first film in 1984.

It introduced me to you and your work, and it changed my life in many ways.

I don't say this often.

Wait a minute.

I say it just about every time.

Constantly.

It's an honor to have you here.

I mean, I've said it to complete nobody's in the business.

It's a formality more than anything else.

But a complete and utter honor

to have you here.

This is a dream.

And I thank you all very much for for that.

The dream come true, is what you mean.

Thank all of you.

It's a dream come true.

Yes, I'm sorry, because they're bad dreams.

You're right.

All right.

Spinal Tap, Marty DiPerjee,

thank you guys so much.

And Spinal Tap 2, The End Continues, is in theater September 12th.

And their new book, A Fine Line Between Clever and Stupid.

No, no, no, no.

A fine line between stupid and clever.

Who's that?

And whoever wrote this is just stupid.

Yeah.

But reading it was kind of good.

That's available September 9th, and I'm in for all things tap, as I think our audience is and many people listening.

Spinal tap, ladies and gentlemen, Marty Divergie.

Thank you.

That was great.

Thank you so much for including us in that.

That was really sweet of you.

It was a real moment for you.

I was looking for a moment when one of your obsessions would come up in the conversation.

Yeah.

You know what I mean?

But it didn't.

It didn't happen.

That's all right.

Channing Tatum never came up.

Ebs.

I told you guys, jump in at any time.

Did I not say that beforehand?

You did.

Okay, then shut up.

I'm not even complaining.

I know.

I just wanted to go after you.

It was fun.

Yeah, go after him.

That was really fun.

That was fun.

Lovely to talk to those guys.

And, I mean, saw them years ago and to finally meet them.

And together it was just one of those pinch-me moments.

Yep.

Yeah.

Big time.

Okay.

That's an awkward silence.

Yep.

Sorry, a little sincerity and everyone's like, what the fuck was that?

We don't know what to do.

How is that funny?

Because we're just waiting for the other shoe to drop.

You know, there's no other shoe.

What?

There's.

No, nothing.

I just had a really lovely moment.

You can both shut up now.

No, that's just sincerity.

You don't know what that looks like.

I mean, that's a nice.

Yeah, it doesn't look very attractive.

Guys, I do have the glasses on sometimes and I take them off sometimes.

And I think I'm a fidgety person, but I like the movement.

I like the action.

Nobody was asking about it.

Well, they asked me about it.

I know, but it's you, you know, you do that.

I'll do it again.

Huh?

Yeah.

Look at that guy.

Oh.

Oh, yeah.

I can't see now.

I'm going to read.

What'd you say?

What are you doing?

You doing a little bit?

I can't hear you when his glasses are off.

Yeah.

Take your glasses off.

What a trick.

Oh, what's going on?

Well, hey, guys, this is nice.

Hey, hey, hey,

you're great.

You like that bit?

That was great.

The guy you can't hear when his glasses are are off?

Yeah, I was doing the effects in your head and stuff.

Okay, let's do it again.

Yeah, okay.

Ah, this is fun.

Oh,

life is nice.

I want to cry.

I love how everything is.

Oh, God, if I just walk out of here, I love this job.

So I go, oh, when I put my glasses back on, I hired you as an assistant.

You do sound effects.

You do voices.

You do tricks.

I know.

You had no idea.

Hey, Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend is brought to you by Airbnb.

Hey.

Hello, and welcome to the very first Conan O'Brien Airbnb original experience.

This is our first time.

Very exciting.

For our audio listeners, we're at the Sirius XM garage here in Los Angeles, and we are having a blast.

And whoever wrote that put an exclamation point at the end, which makes me think it was Blais.

Yes.

Yes, guilty.

Yeah, yeah.

You would talk that way at a funeral.

Isn't this awesome?

No one expected you die that young.

This is a very special event.

This is really fun.

Everyone here today is getting custom rock and roll merch.

Yeah.

And Blay, what else are they getting?

Well, everybody got to say how they feel about being Conan O'Brien's friend, which is a first for our podcast.

As well as

after the recording is done, stick around because we've got the U.S.

Air Guitar Association is here.

They are the NFL of Air Guitar.

You're going to compete for fame and glory, see a showcase of Air Guitar All-Stars in the first ever Team Coco Air Guitar Championship, which is very exciting.

Yeah, there's some cool signed stuff you can.

And it's all signed by Blay, though.

Yeah, just so you know.

Yeah.

And the stuff is pieces of asbestos from a decommissioned battleship.

Enjoy that asbestos.

No, we have some great stuff for you.

U.S.

Air Guitar Championship.

What happened to our podcast?

What happened?

I ascended the very highest heights of show business.

Stick around for our Air Guitar Championship.

It's fun.

People are going to have a good time.

How do you guys like our original Airbnb experience?

How great is Final Tap?

Would you have a good time?

Everyone, have a good time.

I want to just big thanks to everyone who came out to our Team Coco Airbnb experience, and thank you to Airbnb for making this happen.

They've been terrific partners, and I'm also a satisfied Airbnb customer.

And I believe now is the part of the show.

We're going to introduce your real assistant.

Well, I shouldn't say that.

My true assistant.

That's not cool.

The hammer of Thor sits beside me.

This is, you are forged in Asgard.

You are the original immortal weapon, the Sonom Obsession.

When you say Conan's assistant, it's Sona.

That is Sona's assistant.

Conan's assistant is Sona.

Sona is the assistant to Conan.

It's just one of those universal truths.

But Sona, of course, went on to bigger and better things.

She's now on a giant billboard in Times Square.

She's got her own book.

She's gone on to, she drives around in a Bentley.

Did you know that Sona has a Bentley?

Not me alone.

Yeah, and her license plate says, suck it.

Yes!

It would, yeah, it would.

You would get that.

I would.

But she's in the stratosphere.

I need someone who actually can show me how to use my apps.

And these days, that man is, where is he?

David Hopping.

Are you here?

David Hopping.

David, join us.

All right.

Right here.

Sit or stand.

David, your current obsession.

Why don't you have a seat?

You can say it's coming.

Just don't get comfortable.

It's just as far away as possible.

I'm going to make you leave.

Yeah, that's great.

It looks like you're being punished.

Yeah.

This is like a COVID protocol.

Okay.

David.

Yes.

You're obsessed lately with The Summer I Turn Pretty, right?

Sona and I both are.

What's going on with that?

Because every time I will call you about something important, like there's a small fire in my kitchen.

How do I contact the fire department?

And you'll say, are you watching The Summer I Turn Pretty?

Oh, yeah, because it comes out every Wednesday.

Which one are you, Team Brenda or JoJo?

What is it?

Oh,

I don't know the names of the people.

I think we're all Team Conrad.

I do.

Yay!

There's our homies in the back.

In the back.

Yeah.

No, Sona and I text about this show.

We do.

It's very important.

Anytime there's like a Netflix show or like

a show made for like 16-year-old girls, I know I can rely on Sona to watch it as well.

Anything with like hot 20-something-year-olds just like doing it, we'll watch it.

At what point, I mean,

this question.

At what point is it creepy that you're watching that stuff and getting excited about it?

If I were to admit that I love watching hot 20-year-olds go at it, I'm immediately arrested and rightfully so.

What about you?

When has it become creepy?

I don't know, probably

now.

Is that weird?

Like, as I was saying it, I was like, I mean, they're not

even great.

It's not great.

It's not a good look.

You are helping the business.

You know what I love?

This is how you help me the most: is that I bring you in to ask you about various things and you tell me, David, what's going on in the youth culture, what's happening in America, because you're from the heartland.

You're still very innocent.

You're very naive.

He is.

He grew up, I think.

He grew up not near a cornfield.

He grew up in and among

the corn grew up around him.

And

you are always telling me this is what people are watching now.

I'm Team Conrad.

I don't know what's happening.

And so I use you to keep me aware of what's happening.

It's job security.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And how to use my apps.

Yeah.

All right.

What are we doing here?

You're going to take some questions from the audience and then give them answers.

Yeah.

So raise your hand.

No, we're just taking questions, but no answer.

Raise your hand if you have a question.

David, I can hear your shoes.

It's awkward.

Sorry.

Hi, I'm Alan.

I'm very nervous right now.

Don't be nervous.

This is a safe space.

We're all friends.

I might attack you at any moment.

I have also hired people to attack you from behind.

Don't be nervous.

Seriously, we're just people, but I'm I'm exceptionally talented.

Go ahead.

I'm one of those people that's like, oh my God, you met him.

What did you say?

And there's a lot of, what's that?

If you want to stand?

This was fine.

God damn.

Blair, I love you.

I love you.

We love you.

You know you love you.

We know you.

Oh, and this doesn't work.

That's great.

Okay.

I now have this mic, and I can stand.

What's your name again?

Alan.

Olan.

Alan.

Ilan.

Olan.

Olan.

Like Alon came Alan.

You were right to be nervous.

All right.

Alan.

I'm kidding.

I'm totally kidding.

All right.

Joe, how are you?

Honaine, I was wondering.

I started watching you when I was 12, so this was always a dream of mine.

Oh, that's cool.

Yeah.

Are there guests who you still get nervous to talk to?

I wouldn't say I get nervous.

That would be the wrong word.

I get focused.

I get very focused.

I think this has been thousands and thousands of hours, and I've talked to so many people.

There's no nervous anymore, but there is

a moment before I go out where I look at, I think about what I'm going to talk about, and I get with certain people, and I get very focused.

So you don't have to fight through anything?

I don't think I have to fight through anything anymore.

And this sounds like a joke, but I just think I've been through so much that at this point, it's hard to summon that.

That was

probably more in my earlier life, in my 20s and early 30s.

But at this point, I think all of my dignity has been shredded.

And I'm just, I don't know.

I'm being truthful.

I think there's a, okay, let's see what happens.

Does anything make you nervous?

Anything else?

What do you mean?

Like, am I capable of feeling nervous?

Am I like the guy who's scaling?

Do you have feelings?

Are you?

like free solo?

Do I not have the part on my brain?

Yeah.

I fear,

yeah, I would fear.

There are plenty of things I would fear, but not

getting up in front of people.

Yeah.

I think making a terrible financial decision would frighten me because I think I'd be blamed and mocked.

I thought you were going to say something about your family.

No, God, no.

You can always get another family.

Hey, nice to meet you.

And good question.

Yes.

Hey, Lon.

Alon.

Alon.

I'm not doing this on purpose.

I have a new favorite podcast now.

I deserve that.

Whose alarm is going off?

I think it's someone's sincerity alarm.

Did you hear a beeping sound?

No.

Nope.

Someone.

Did you hear it?

Anyone?

Oh, my God.

I think I'm very ill.

Wow.

Yes, how can I help you, sir?

So I have less of a question, more of a quick request.

I have my Instant camera on me.

Could I take a picture with the gang?

Yeah, of course.

Can I come down now?

Yeah.

I like your late show with Stephen Colby.

The champion our shirt.

No, seriously,

good friend, Stephen, and I'm glad you're out representing.

Good man.

So let's get down here and let's take this picture.

Do we have to stand up?

Why don't you lie down?

There you go.

Wow.

This is all going to be requests now.

No one's going to ask a question anymore.

Conan, I'm type O positive.

Can I have a pancreas?

Okay, we're going to go back to questions.

Gentlemen, yes, you brought your own microphone.

Very good.

How can I help you?

I would love it if people brought their own microphones.

I know.

That was our one request.

Go ahead, sir.

So I was wondering, outside of This is Spinal Tap, what's your favorite Christopher Guest movie?

Oh, wow.

I'm going to say Waiting for Guffman.

Hell yeah.

Yeah, I love Waiting for Guffman.

I mean, I can just watch it endlessly.

He's genius-level funny.

And so I'm delighted by so much of his work.

So a follow-up call, Coden.

You guys are getting out of here.

Last I had a question, but turned it into a photo op.

You took one question and turned it into two.

I don't like the way this is going.

Go ahead, sir.

So, when you saw This is Spinal Tap in 1984, was that like, so for me, watching The Simpsons, late 80s, early 90s, that was my first look at satire and parody ever.

So, for you, can you think of anything?

Because Monty Python was a bit more sketch comedy and less satire and parody in a direct sense.

Do you think This is Spinal Tap was like, helped mold you into wanting to do satire?

Definitely.

I mean, there's nobody

from my era

who wasn't influenced by that film.

I believe that there's a period of your life that only happens once when music, comedy, all the things that are important to you can hit you in a very pure, unadulterated way.

And then a window closes.

It doesn't close completely, but there's a period in your life, and it's like 15, 16, 17.

And for me, that was SCTV, definitely Monty Python, you know, Clusot films, select ones with Peter Sellers.

There were just things that were moments on Saturday Night Live.

There were things that just hit me directly mainlined into my brainstem.

And 1984, I'm working for this college humor magazine.

I've sworn myself,

it's like a, I remembered saying, I don't care if I totally never make a penny, if I'm, if it never goes anywhere, I'm going to devote myself to comedy.

I recently cleaned out my parents' house and I found all these comedy ideas I was writing when I was like 19, 20, and they're not good.

And at the bottom of one page, I was writing them on a typewriter.

And no one was even, I mean, computers existed at the time, so I don't know.

I'm still writing things on a typewriter.

But in ink, at the bottom, I had reviewed my work and said, please, comedy gods, help me to do better than this crap.

I mean, I was so hard on myself.

And that's the age I am when I go to this theater in like Alston, Massachusetts, and see where you're from.

All right, you are being arrested.

You look amazing, by the way.

You look lovely.

But

yeah,

I saw this as Spinal Tap, and

I think a lot of us had the same feeling, which is this is a way of being funny that was so ahead of its time.

And if you think about The Office and Parks and Rec and all these shows that

do

reportage kind of mockumentary style, to me, it really starts with, I know the Ruttles precedes that, but the real pure dose is Spinal Tap.

So meant everything to me.

Yeah.

Great question.

Take some more questions here, and David will get to you.

He's just taking his time, that's all.

He got the mic, but he's my husband, so he gave it to me.

Oh, that's such a nice

batch.

I think he might have an actual question, but this is so awkward.

No, no, no, don't don't worry.

It's more of a, can I give you a gift or something?

I'm an illustrator and I drew a picture of you.

Oh my god, bring it on up.

That's so nice.

Come on up.

Check it out.

That's so cool.

That's so nice.

I can't show everyone the whole thing.

What is this?

Because I think I might get in trouble with work if I show you the whole thing.

Oh, I shouldn't.

Will I get you in trouble if you want to?

Will we edit this out?

You can show it and edit this.

You can show that.

You just yell things.

Take off your pants.

Put a stapler in your ass.

What?

Oh, I see what this is.

I can show this.

That's so great.

This is me looking at.

I mean, we may have to.

I think it's been made public, actually.

Okay, good.

Yes, but this is the character I'm going to play in Toy Story 5, whose name's Smarty Pants.

That's right.

I love that.

And who do you work for?

Disney Pixar Studios.

Yay!

Well, you're not only fired, but they're going to pursue you the rest of your life.

I hope

none of them like you.

Do you work up at the Bay Area?

No, no, Glendale, but I do visit Emeryville sometimes.

Okay, so I'm working on the Toy Story 5.

I have a character in it, which is one of the coolest things I've been a part of.

And I got to go up to the Pixar Studios in the Bay Area, and they showed me all the offices and all these iconic things.

And it was like Willy Wonk is saying, Do you want to see my chocolate factory?

That was crazy.

Yeah.

And it was really fun.

I've seen the offices before too, just once, and it was kind of mind-blowing.

Yeah.

Well, you guys are so talented.

It's so cool.

Did you actually make this yourself?

So I work on product.

So I work on things like I drew Smarty Pants for product, but it doesn't look as nice.

It's like for kids.

So they really want it.

That's all right.

That's all right.

You're doing well.

I love it when creative, talented people just find a way to make their mark on the world.

That's really impressive to me.

It's good to be here because I was in legal for nine years before this, and it's you escaped hell.

I escaped hell.

Yes.

And I'm not putting down lawyers, but you're terrible.

Sorry, you offended.

And what is your, let's give a shout out to your, what is your husband's name?

Jonathan John John.

You forgot his name for a second, didn't you?

This marriage is in terrible trouble.

He surrendered the microphone out of fear.

Are you

a creative person as well?

He He likes to write poems.

Oh, that's lovely.

Recite.

Wait a minute.

Recite.

Recite it.

You stand up and say,

Recite it!

I can say he did spoken word at our wedding, and I was mortified.

Oh!

Wait, but wait a minute.

Wow.

I'm going to stick up for him.

I think, hey, that's lovely that you would do that.

That guy's got, I mean, that's very cool.

Yeah, it is.

You know what?

I wanted someone to do spoken word at my wedding, and someone did.

It was just a, it turned out it was just a drunken diatribe about the many ways I've fucked people over in life

by my new wife.

Lovely to meet you.

Thank you so much for this.

And give my best to the gang at Pixar.

You're really talented.

So cool.

What's that?

Why are you yelling now?

Wait, I'm sorry.

That was his latest poem.

Very cool.

Now I'm just cruising around like a creep.

Hey, how are you?

Oh, how are you?

You scared of me now, right?

Love the hair.

Anybody else?

I can just go to you and have a question.

Yes, how are you, sir?

What do you have?

Just shout it out.

Okay, thank you.

So, first, I wanted to say thank you very much.

I'm going to get behind you in case you prove to be dangerous.

You're dressed like a Batman villain.

I love it.

Two faces here.

No, stand up, sir.

Show everyone your outfit.

Man, you dressed up for this.

Good for you.

Look at that.

Very nice.

What is your name?

I'm Christopher.

Christopher.

Okay, Okay, can you use the mic on him real quick?

What's that?

Hold on, watch this.

I'll do it.

I've watched game shows.

What's your name again, sir?

My name is Christopher.

Christopher, nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you.

I'm moving a microphone between us, so this conversation will be staccato.

Is that okay with you?

That is very okay with me.

Okay, where'd you get the outfit?

H ⁇ M.

Okay, terrific.

Wonderful company.

But not a sponsor.

They can go to hell.

What's your question, sir?

So my question is, what do you use for your hair, and when can we expect a hair care line from you?

You know what?

Okay, this is a great question.

This is a terrific question because my manager, Gavin Pallone, a true animal, who I've been with since like 1992, he's always wanting me to be involved with some kind of product.

He says, there's a lot of money in that stuff, man.

And I'll say, that's not me.

I don't do that.

But then we did come up with an idea a while ago, and we just haven't done it, which is a pomade.

A pomade.

Where's my illustrator friend?

There we go.

A pomade, but like it's got that cool kind of 1930s.

It comes in that tin, and it's got like a cool logo, and it's the Conan pomade.

And I'm telling you, it would be the goop of the modern era.

It's not, I was just referencing the company, but it would be,

you know, because that's done great for Gwyneth.

I mean, she drives around in nine Bentleys strapped together that all say suck it.

Which you can't have more than one license plate that says the same thing, but she got around it because she's Gwyneth.

I think a pomade.

I think a pomade and a couple of pomades.

What do you think?

I'll buy it right now.

What's that?

Say again?

If you have it, I'll buy it right now.

Well, you seem like a sap.

I'll buy anything.

I'm going to somehow make this happen.

A Conan pomade, and I'll donate all the...

Well, no, I'm not going to say that.

That's just stupid.

I mean, what if it really blows up?

I'll say this.

If it doesn't do well, I'll donate the proceeds to a good cause.

If it does really well, I'm buying an island somewhere, okay?

And I'm just going to go there and be a total freak.

All right, so yeah, what's that?

I said conade, and then I got really embarrassed I did that.

So I don't know.

I've never known you to be embarrassed about anything you've said.

I know, because I said it so quietly and no one heard it, and I was like, I got away with it.

And then you turned around to me and asked me.

No, I sensed that you were in danger.

Yeah.

I'm like a T-Rex that sees movement.

If someone slightly misspeaks, I can see for 900 miles.

That's true.

That's so true.

Yeah, I'm like this pomade idea.

I'm telling you, it could have like a cool logo that looks like it's like kind of from the 20s.

And it's, what's that?

Outline of my hair.

But you know what I mean?

It has that needs just the right font.

I've got to get the right mixture of different spices and oils.

I want it to be something you can also eat if you're hungry.

I want to put a little protein in it so there's a little bit of

cow collagen in there.

And you can just put it in your hair, but then go like, I'm feeling tired.

And a little oil.

I want there to be little tiny pieces of bacon inside.

This is the cream that goes in your hair.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Okay.

Uh, all right.

What's with dummy over here?

I love this.

I think this is a fantastic idea.

What's your name?

Yeah, I just like wandering around, but use the mic.

It's good.

Because it's all going to end up on the podcast.

Hi, how are you?

Nice to see you.

Really?

Delighted.

I saw you ladies backstage.

Don't know how you got back there.

It frightened me.

Yes, guys.

I was just letting you schmooze, which is totally cool.

Not letting you know.

Like a wingman's lady.

Like a wingman.

That's very cool.

You're like, oh, Conan's talking to these ladies up front.

I better give him his space so that he can cheat on his wife.

No!

Absolutely not.

How dare you turn against Liza like that?

No, absolutely not.

Anyway, drinks later.

I also had another movie question.

Yep.

And it's probably open-ended, but you're obviously like the creator of your universe and going in.

What are you talking about?

Do not give him any idea.

With everyone.

The creator of my universe, I'm looking at the people out here so that they feel included.

It's the guy that high five me.

I don't do well with them.

I don't get a good connection.

It's not you.

Your elbow?

Look at the elbow.

Look at the elbow?

Yeah?

Okay, sir.

No.

I'm sorry.

I will take your question in one second.

You had a question about me creating the universe and then this guy.

Go ahead, sir.

So I will teach you how to give a perfect high-five every time.

But I don't like doing them.

Then I will not teach you how to give a perfect high five.

Just teach me so I know how to do it if I need to do it.

Go ahead.

I'm assuming you're right-handed.

Yes, I am, sir.

What a dick.

I'm being man-splained, and I'm a man.

All right.

You look at my elbow.

Yeah.

And I'm going to look at your elbow.

And then down the three, we got one, two, three.

Yeah.

Yours was much stronger than mine, and it pulled my elbow out of my socket.

My shoulder, I'm bleeding into my shirt.

I'm going to do that.

I'm gonna start, but you know what?

A lot of people.

What's that?

Oh, you have your own podcast going on over here?

There's a lot of people.

There's a lot of people on the street, and this is that gets me.

Sometimes people are maybe 30 yards away, and they'll be like, Turn it!

And they stand there like the fucking statue of liberty and

click, you know what I mean?

And then they've been eating a sloppy joe, they haven't washed their hands, it's a mess, sir.

What's your name?

Hypes.

Okay, hypes.

Oh, you're the air guitar guy.

I could tell there was something about you that

caused me an existential dread.

Well, best of luck to you.

Your parents must be thrilled.

Let's check it out.

Thank you so much.

Nice to meet you, sir.

Well, you're in for a treat with Hypes.

Hypes, the master of air guitar.

I'm so sorry.

Your name again?

You know, when Hypes takes over, I mean, he literally smashed through the window.

Totally fine.

There's a reason they put him behind that salad guard.

It's totally fine.

But it's your movie with Rose Burns.

Yes, yeah.

Yeah.

If I had legs, I'd kick you.

Yeah, and again, it's very open-ended, but like you obviously are you, you know?

You said it like there's nothing that can be done.

Tragically, you are you, and this is a condition from which no one recovers.

But it's just that shift, right?

Like, obviously, you've acted all that, but even when I saw the trailer, I was like, oh, wow, this is something totally different.

Yeah.

And again, open-ended question.

Well, Well,

there is no question there.

Yeah,

I think I know what you're getting at, which is

talk about that thing that you did.

I'm thrilled because I got a it's an A24 film, and I love their, I mean,

I love everything A24 does.

I get a call.

It's an A24 film.

The director wants to show you a script that she's written.

Her name's Mary Bronstein.

I meet with her.

She's got such a cool vision.

She writes this script that floors me.

And then

Rose Byrne is cast, and all my scenes are opposite Rose.

And I, like anyone who's sentient, adores Rose Byrne.

I just adore her.

I just think she's amazing.

And so I do this.

I took it really seriously.

And Rose gives this insane performance.

Who here has seen it?

Have you seen it, Sona?

You haven't seen it.

No.

Who has?

I think, David, you saw it.

And Rose, right?

Oh, my God.

It's incredible.

Here, Steph, you should have a microphone.

David saw it.

That's cool.

Yeah.

Because I took

your job.

Yeah, I'm happy for you.

You just do cool things.

That's just insane.

And David was with me during the shooting of it because that's what a real assistant does.

He comes with you.

And it was a really difficult time.

And you were.

You never shot movies when I worked for you, so

that's on you, bro.

Okay, I guess it is.

I guess it is.

It's my fault.

Yeah, and he went to Pixar with you, too, didn't he?

Yeah, we had so many.

I mean.

You know what's great?

My career has just blossomed into this wonderful thing.

And Sona stepped off the boat.

Sona was on a boat that went to Pittsburgh, Cleveland.

Now we've hit the Caribbean, and just beforehand, she stepped off.

So you

screwed up, Sona.

Anyway, it's really fun.

It was a great experience.

I really think the movie is fantastic, and I credit completely.

I mean, it's Mary Bronstein, it's Rose Byrne.

ASAP Rocky.

I'm in there too, but I give it up totally for them.

I just was

so I love being a part of of that, and I'm excited to hear what people think when it comes to that.

I'm really excited to see you in like, like, in that medium space, you know what I mean?

Yeah, not so shrill and needy.

Not necessarily that.

Words created by other people.

It just seems so mean and like unapologetic.

Yeah, it's funny.

I guess I'm a great actor.

I pretended and was able to act as if I have a mean part of me.

And it was just a complete transformation.

Unbelievable.

No one can believe.

But what I did is I read about people being mean and cruel, and I tried to imagine what that was like.

Don't like you, and I don't like you.

I think that is our show.

This was,

you know,

I'll say this.

This was just fun.

Like so many of the things we get to do in this medium, this was just complete fun.

This is not work.

This is play.

And so grateful that we got to do this.

Really amazing, and thank you.

You guys made this really fun with your energy and your enthusiasm, and you seem like really nice people, and we're blessed to have fans like you.

Let's do it again.

All right,

Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend with Conan O'Brien, Sonom Obsession, and Matt Gorley.

Produced by me, Matt Gorley.

Executive produced by Adam Sachs, Jeff Frost, and Nick Liao.

Theme song by The White Stripes.

Incidental music by Jimmy Vivino.

Take it away, Jimmy.

Our supervising producer is Aaron Blair, and our associate talent producer is Jennifer Samples.

Engineering and Mixing by Eduardo Perez and Brendan Burns.

Additional production support by Mars Melnick.

Talent booking by Paula Davis, Gina Batista, and Britt Kahn.

You can rate and review this show on Apple Podcasts and you might find your review read on a future episode.

Got a question for Conan?

Call the Team Cocoa Hotline at 669-587-2847 and leave a message.

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And if you haven't already, please subscribe to Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend wherever fine podcasts are downloaded.