Suikoden One-Shot

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Hi there, this is Talison Jaffe, and welcome to the podcast version of the Critical Roll Show. If you would like to watch the stream as it airs, you can tune in on Thursdays at 7 p.m.

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Podcast episodes are right here on the Critical Role Podcast Network on Thursdays, one week after the initial broadcast. Now that you know all that, let's head into today's adventure.

Hello, everyone, and welcome to tonight's fantastic one-shot in collaboration with our friends at Konami and inspired by the legendary Suikoren Saga.

Suikoren is a beloved RPG series that first captured Hearts Nearly three decades ago in Japan. Oh my god, three decades.
Not just in Japan, I played this in high school.

And now...

I love it. It's a really good series.

And now these classic stories are being reborn in stunning HD with Suikoden 1 and 2 HD Remaster with enhanced HD visuals, remastered sound effects, and improvements like Autosave, Battle Fast Forward.

There's really never been a better time to experience these legendary games. For real? That's awesome.
Yeah, it's pretty awesome. Like, the Suicoden 2 was like contraband for many years.

I still have my original copy.

But if you can't get that on eBay, which you shouldn't because it's too expensive, get the HD Remaster, which is out right now for Xbox, PlayStation 4, PlayStation 5, Nintendo Switch, and Steam.

You can learn more at bit.ly/slash cr Suicoden.

That said, while you may recognize the places and characters explored tonight as inspired by elements from the Suicide and 1 and 2 HD Remastered game, we want to emphasize that the characters and events in this one-shot are our own creations and are not official content from Suicide 1 and 2 HD Remastered.

They are simply inspired by it. But Konami, if you want some ideas,

call me up.

But thank you so much for Konami for sponsoring this one-shot. And I guess let's go ahead and get this adventure going in the spirit of Suicoden.

Once we introduce our players real fast here, we have our usual CR players at the table, Talison Jaffe, and Ashley Johnson, and three new friends at the table, starting with Zeno Robinson over here on the other side of the table,

Zach Ronaldo over here,

and Aaron Hanson.

Thank you all so much for coming to me and part of this.

And let's go ahead and jump into.

No, thank you. Thank you.
Thank you.

Let's take that energy into tonight's Suicide in One Shot.

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And welcome back.

So,

years of bloody conflict and tension throughout the Dunen region now shift toward an end.

A recent ceasefire between the warring city-states of Joustan and the Highland Kingdom trend towards a resolution.

And the populace is eager to return to a semblance of a normal life.

Here in the lands of the Jouston Alliance, the outer walls are lined with military outposts that hold their breath in hopes of a lasting armistice, even with Highland forces still amassed on the borders, while rumors of the Highland mad Prince Luca Blight cruelly spread like ghost stories amongst the rank and file.

Our story, however, calls us to the outskirts of Meuse City, the largest city within the city-states of Jouston and the center of trade and commerce. Or

it would be if one had any poch in their pockets to spend.

As it's here, along the scrub-brush-framed roads north of the Dunen Lake, that a troop of ragtag mercenaries wander beyond the city walls in search of better fortune.

For times of peace spell more disparate income for those who walk a self sword's path, and the recent rain hasn't helped you either.

But

Pushed from the city of Coin, this motley pack of five wanderers head southeast in hopes of opportunity, a gray sky above threatening to reveal sunshine any moment.

As the raindrops bristle down, pattering onto your various heavy cloaks and hoods as you push down this kind of dirt, rugged path through the open scrub fields here.

Who is leading the troop in this direction?

I'll say

age before beauty. All right.

Tal,

who do we see at the helm of this pack? Well,

heading in the front. Are we on a cart, if I recall?

You tell me, are you on a cart or you are? We are on a cart. So driving the cart with everybody in the back

is

an older gentleman, mid-50s, but a fit mid-50s.

A little salt in the hair.

well built.

He's, you know, he doesn't need the cloak. It's really, it's it's invigorating to have a little water pouring on you, get the circulation up.

He's wearing a sleeveless green tunic tied at the waist with, you know, simple green pants, nice boots, and then he's got his fists wrapped in old cloth and these nice metal steel bracers on either hand and a green piece of fabric.

tied around his head with a little gem in the center.

He's clearly a fighter. He's well built.
He's strong, but

he's seen some better days. He's kind of at the end of his rope.

And this would be Teddy. Teddy.
Crack! As one of the wheels of the wagon hits a heavy rock and it kind of kicks up for a second.

You have to catch the horses that are pulling the front a little bit for a minute. The rest of you jostle in the back at the sudden impact as it kind of writes itself for a second.

Hey, gemhead, can you drive straight?

Depends. Can you actually sit down and shut up? No.

Then you're gonna get what you're gonna get.

Are you all right, Sensei Theodore?

It's just a rough road, I'm fine.

Peeking out from the cart front to check in on Teddy here, who do we see?

We see a

young

probably looks about 16.

He's got dark skin. He's got long,

flowing dreadlocks. Everything about him seems to be flowing.
He's got like a pink sort of hood on his tunic here, as well as a black underneath. And he's got like a waist, like flowing.

What is that? Like,

what are these things? They look really cool.

They look really cool.

But, you know, it's like

a waistcloth. They look really cool.

And some sandals. He's currently got the hood up.
He also has, has

as well, kind of mirroring Sensei Theodore,

a bandana, a pearl bandana with a gem in the center tied in exactly the same way.

And yeah, this is Zusari.

Zussari, as you step back after checking on your master, you head back into the relatively cramped cart that you're all kind of placed inside.

There is nothing to carry in here but yourselves and not a potch amongst you. But as you kind of sit down, the first to raise their voice loudly, Mabel, who do we see there and what are they doing?

Well, Mabel is a tiny elf woman, big red hair, spiky hair,

constant just sarcastic grin on her face and just like bushy eyebrows. She's got like

these boots that are cool and like these like shoulder pads that are cool. And she's also got like a cloak.
that's pretty cool. Pretty cool.
Not gonna lie to that as cool.

And right beside her is this giant, I mean it's it's basically as big as her this hammer that's just sitting around and she's always kind of like got it with her, you know, like kind of like oh, this is my friend.

I'm never gonna let it go, you know what I'm saying?

And she's like, are we there yet?

Yes. Yes, we are.
I'm actually just I'm gonna keep driving. That's why we're just going right by it

for real? No! I don't think so. I think so.
No, look how we're already fighting like a team. And it's been like this the entire time, actually.
I figured it was weird because we were still going.

I just wanted to know if we're close or whatever were there not enough snacks in the back well there were no snacks there's no snacks

we are poor

i heard the cover tip uh pippi with her hand in her stomach what do we see uh okay you see pippi lamage

but she goes by pips

um she has uh reddish coppery hair and sort of fun buns with long braids also flowing out the bottom that sort of flip behind her whenever she moves.

She's wearing sort of like little bloomer pants but with combat boots with buckles. She's about 16.

She's wearing her dad's big leather jacket and she grabbed running out the door and a floppy leather patchwork hat and

she

has grown up on a farm with her family, but dreams of seeing the world

and

she's gone to school with Wasari. Yes.

And sort of grown up together. Maybe she has a crush.
I don't know. Maybe.
I don't know.

And

scandalous. I don't know.
I'm just throwing it out there.

And

met

Barnaby over here

a couple weeks ago and was just astonished by what a worldly traveler.

He was. Which, as you, you know, mentioned how hungry you might be and someone as worldly as Barnaby and you glance over to see if perhaps he has something to offer the conversation.

Barnaby, if you wouldn't mind describing the final member of this fine troop, kind of into the back corner of the cart. Of course.

Yo, this guy's mask rules. A huge helmet is donned onto a very lanky,

skinny

figure that is holding a huge amalgamation of different items on this huge pack on his back.

Indented into the carriage's

floor is this massive shield that is that is red, matches the rest of his armor, kind of has this rusted look.

And as he talks, this beard that kind of pokes out of his helmet kind of moves up and down.

Yo, that's a beard. Oh, yes, it is.
What you thought it was part of the helmet? I don't know. Yeah, I mean, I guess I wasn't really thinking about it, but what a magnificent beard it is.
I'm sorry?

What a magnificent beard it is. Oh, I thank you.
I groaned myself.

You see that Barnaby has his hands stuck into like a finger trap.

And he goes, he goes pips I have found myself to be stuck in a cursed item again. Oh, okay.
Well the thing is you just need to

you're gonna try to pull it out really quickly. You just have to do it slow.
You notice there are gnaw marks on it. I have tried biting it off.
It has not worked.

Yeah, well how have you been trying to bite it off? I can't actually see this.

Okay, that was my question. That is true.

May I help? Oh, absolutely. All right.
You just have to just like separate it really slow.

Because I think you were kind of doing it with some stress. Oh, I was very stressed.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I thought it was eternal.
Oh, well,

no. Oh, put that thing away.
It's cursed.

What are you talking about, man? You had a magic item on this freaking character. I'm sorry.
I didn't realize I'll put it back in the lead sack I have for the rest of the cursed items.

Hold on.

No! Keep that shit away. All right.
Well, hey, maybe if you need one at some point. What was that?

All these different

strange, animal-esque voices begin to call

from one direction, then another,

almost triangulating or surrounding the position of the current cart in the midst of this darkened gray sky and the falling rain.

You listen quietly and can hear what sounds like small barks and snapping of jaws and low snarls. Multitudes, all seemingly finding their way through the scrub brush.

You to the front there, Teddy, kind of glance off to one side and swear you see a shadow of a few things dart for one patch of like low scrub-covered hill and dried brush. Is it puppies?

Sounds like a dog. Everyone, get ready.
Everyone, I want you looking at different sides of the cart. To the right, to the left, behind.

Dibs on left.

Okay, I'll take it. I'll look behind.

They're coming to come from the sky. I don't.
All right.

Your vision's kind of impaired. You just sit there.
It is. It's raiding as well.

Prepare something amazing in one of your pouches. Oh, don't you worry.
None of that magic shit, though. Okay, all right.
I'll stay out of the bag.

As suddenly, out of one of the nearby bushes, three of these massive dark shadow wolves dart out towards the front of your cart.

First random encounter.

Guys, here we come down.

Look at this.

As three of these wolves

dart down to the front. Here we have you arranged in the front row and back row.
This is a customized battle system based off the Suicide and Combat System.

So we will, at the top of this battle, roll for the order of how you maneuver in this from each combat round. And one roll d20 and add your speed bonus to it.

Speed bonus.

I got a six.

All right.

All right, so 20 to 20, 20 to 15. 21.
21.

Roll these off. So grab your d12.
Roll these off.

And D20. D20.
Okay. And

six. Six.

Roll it. Roger it.
Roll again.

Seven. One.

All right, so Teddy is up first. It does, it does.

With Barnabas. Barnaby.

Then

we have Mabel. Mabel.
My name's Mabel, by the way. I don't know if I was clear about that.
You do that on the hour. Every time.
What can I say? I want people to know it.

11. 11.

Alright.

And... I was six.
Zasari, all right. Zasari.

Alright, Teddy, you're up first with Barnaby on deck as these wolves all charge and kind of surround the front of the cart as you all kind of jump down and ready to defend yourself on the one mode of transportation you have to carry you all around.

Uh, what do you got? All right, I'm heading to the left, Mabel, right after, and I'm going into the guy in the front. Yeah, all right.
Right over here or this one? Uh, that one. This one here? Yeah.

All right, go ahead and roll and attack.

What is that? A two. A two misses and is within the counter range of the shadow dog.
So as you leap forward, fists striking outward, the wolf kind of jukes to one side.

You stumble over a piece of the bush and kind of fall to one knee. As you do, the wolf

leaps on to try and get you. That is going to only be a six, though.

What's your evasion? My evasion is 13. 13 as a miss.
So both of you kind of like woof woof and both kind of back up and get to your defensive positions, kind of eyeing each other. Man versus beast.

See, that's what happens when you're in a gym all day and you're not out on the battlefield having real battles. We're going to see how it goes for you.
Sensei, are your boots tied?

Remember to tie your boots.

I'm going to go down and tie them.

Why are you doing that? Barnaby, Barnaby, you're up. Oh, wonderful.
I will grab my shield and I will sink it into the ground.

May those who seek the wretchedness that is evil gaze upon this one item and I'll pull out this small boomerang and I go, all right, well,

I will take, I will throw it and does a 13 hit. 13 does hit? Yeah, as it goes past, just wait.
And it'll come back and I will do. Well, which one would you like to strike?

None of them have been hit yet. Oh, sorry.
Let me know. I'll hit the back row.
I'll hit the one for the back row. You got it.
For four. No, sorry, eight.
For eight points of damage.

Yeah, get a hold of this guy. Oh.

It comes back. A slight skim off the top, a little bit of fur kind of

off of the wolf. But it's still even slow.
It's like tail flickering there.

Licks its front sharp teeth. I did not expect it to live through that.
I'll pick up the boomerang at my feet. You should not make it through it.

All right, that finishes your go, and it is now the wolves go. This wolf is going to shift into the front row so it can attack next round, but the two on the sides are going to come forward.

They can only attack your front row from where it stands. So the one two that have come to the front of this battlefield, likely at this point, would be both Teddy and Mabel.

So one's going to commit you, Teddy. That's going to be a 14 to hit.
14 to hit.

Yeah, evasion's 13, so it hits. That'll hit.
You take...

It's going to be...

16 points of damage.

Reduced by 7, so that's 9 points of damage. Take 9 points of damage on that one.
The one that's striking you, Mabel. Uh-oh.
That's going to be an 11 to hit. What's your evasion? 13.
13.

The second wolf leaps on towards you,

and you just kind of bat away with your hammer. It doesn't actually do any damage, but it knocks it off

your trajectory. Yo, back off, dude.
That's how you do it.

That finishes those wolves' turns. Mabel, you're up with this on that.

All right, all right. I'll show you how it's done.
I'm going to go ahead and just whack this guy with my hammer. All right, the one that came after you? Oh, yeah.
Go for it.

So go ahead and roll an attack, roll a d20, and add your

four.

Four plus four. Yeah.

Four is within its counter range, so you go bring the hammer wide and slam it down hard.

The ground kind of cracks at the impact, and the wolf just is hiding behind it and snoops around

and lunges back at you in a position. That's going to be a 14 to hit.
Oh, my God.

Well, I'm a seven defense. All right, great.
So that's going to be 12 points of damage reduced by seven. So you take 5 points of damage off that.

As it counter-strikes you from that blow, that finishes your turn. Oh!

I'm just warming up. I'm just warming up.
Yeah, that's what it feels.

I'm going to peek up over Mabel and I'm going to pull out my bow, which is made of twigs and branches, and I'm going to take a shot. Alright, which of the wolves are you firing?

Let's do, let's do the middle one. Middle one.
Middle one's the only one that's been hurt so far. So go for it.
Oh, great. Okay, overall this one.

Okay, so let's see. Oh, 17.
17 hits? Yeah.

Alright.

So we've got... Look at this.
How old did you say you were? I'm 16. Holy moly.

Okay, so we've got.

Okay.

Uh, 10 plus 8, 18. 18 points of damage?

Release the arrow. Shoot, and it snaps inside of its shoulder and like,

falls to one ground and gets back up. It's kind of limping a little on that side.
That one's looking like it's a little hurt. The other two untouched at this point.
Your training is paying off. It is.

I can see it. I can feel it.
Where did you learn a shoe like that?

My dad.

It seemed like you were unsure about that. Well, maybe I've had some other training that I'm not going to talk about right now.
Okay. He was a great marksman, her father.

Okay, I trust you implicitly right now in this video. I'm able to do a lot of hunting.
All right. This isn't my first time.
Okay, I got the picture. There's something behind.

Sorry, we started.

I'm going to attack the one, I'm going to follow up Pips' attack and hit the one right there in the center with my I have these two Tamphas. I'm gonna pull those out and get a little 1-2

in there. Heck yeah, go for it.
Did you leap forward?

Yes,

16. 16 hits.
16 damage.

And that is

13. 13 points of damage on that whole...

It's looking really hurt and it's starting to maybe like back up a little bit.

And it's barely holding all the other two wolves who are are kind of untouched and ready to flare out in anger both at any of you who are at the front row. That finishes your go.
Top of the round.

Teddy, you're up with Barnaby on deck.

Do you want to try something out for this right now? Yes. All right, we're going to Soldier Storm.
You remember this move? Yes, it's already packed. We're going to do a move.

All right, so you're holding out for your Unite? Yeah, whoa.

I was good. Oh, since I was up, yeah, I figure.
Yeah. All right, so you're holding your turn to do Unite attack with.

On my turn. All right.
Oh, we're going to come back around.

So you're kind of now backing over towards Susari, and you're both kind of communicating some

tactical statistics here. I'm going to do the thing.
As we practice. Got it.
While you're doing that, Barnaby, you're up. Yes.

All right.

I guess I'll just swing at, since they're going to do so much damage, I'm going to assume, I'm going to try to weaken one of them. So I'll do the one in front of Mabel.
Then. Right there? Yeah.

Go for it. Yeah, yeah.
All right.

Don't take my guy. Oh, don't worry.
You missed.

All right. So that is a 14.
14. Yeah, as I'm like sideways, like literally impact frames.

break the sound barrier.

I hope Mabel Norway just wants this one. I'll swing it.

And I will hit it for

13 damage. 13 points of damage.

A nice heavy strike to the side of it.

It like cuts through one of the legs, and you watch as it kind of buckles and tumbles and spins a bit, catching itself in the mud that kind of cakes to the back of its fur.

Please come back, please come back, please come back.

Image my hands. It swings back and you catch it in the air.
Kind of hurts your fingers a little bit. Oh, so much.
Yes.

All right, that finishes your go. I don't know.
That was kind of sick, but don't undermine me, okay? All right, no problem. Good throw, Barnaby.
Oh, what a great boomerang you have. Thank you.

Thank you. It is made of wood.
All three wolves.

I'll lunge out towards you. It's going to be one to each of you.
So to Zusari. That's a natural 20.
Chris.

That one.

Oh, that's going to be

17.

34 points of damage.

Minus eight. Minus eight.
As the wolf leaps onto your torso and pushes you into the mud beneath and gets a heavy bite onto the side of your neck and shoulder and tears into you like snarling.

The one that's coming after you, Teddy,

that's going to be a natural four. I don't know what your counter is.

My counter,

well, my counter is two, so that doesn't matter, but it still misses you. Yeah.
And then the one that's attacking you, Mabel. That's going to be a 10 to hit, which I think misses you.

Of course it does.

Duck it out of the way. Wolf's turn's done.
Mabel, you're up but Pip's on deck. All right, all right.
Let's just do another whack at the wait a second. Hold on.

Pip, you know, we got a full, we got a full row here, and I know

you know that elven ambush situation. You better believe it.
Let's do it. Let's go.
All right, so you're both using your knight attack for elf ambush. That's right.
Let's go.

All right, so both of you guys roll attacks. Okay.
So you get the higher one.

Three. This is capped.

Oh, fuck.

Plus. So there was one that was like almost a 16.
Okay, Okay,

nine. A nine.
So seven. Seven, yeah.
Okay, so we'll take the nine for that. Nine is exactly the shadow dog's evasion.
So you do manage to succeed on this by the skinnier teeth. Hey, that's right.

That's that elven magic. Yes.
No, it's not magic.

Yes, it is. No, it's elven magic.
Oh, you're going around. No.
Oh, all right. I'm just using colloquialisms, okay?

All right, so go ahead and roll your separate damages for that ability. Yeah.

Where am I here? Okay. Seven and a two.

Oh, seven.

Fifteen.

Wait, where's it? Seven, two, and eleven. If it's weapon damage? Yeah.
Seven, two plus eleven. Seven, two, plus eleven.
Okay. So that's 20.
Hold on. So 20 and

what did I say? Shit. Let's see.
I said I rolled a three, a four, seven, plus eight. Fifteen.
So fifteen, twenty, that's 35 points of damage to this entire row.

Describe me how you guys combine your attacks here for the elven ambush oh dude it's crazy you you start and i'll finish

so so as as mabel takes a swing i sort of take out my bow and as she settles i kind of like um um get the the arrow sort of right on her shoulder to like take aim as she's like kind of moving and where she takes a shot i just let it go yeah and then and then the bow is like exiting the the the i mean the the arrow is exiting the bow and then i just go wham and i hit the the arrow on the back and it it goes even faster.

It just goes zoom right through all of them. So, as you, as you turn on, so you come around the side, you fire the arrow here, and you full-on, like, batter up, hit the arrow, then

it just carves through all three of them. The two on the sides, as it literally goes through them, kind of fall and like look over, like, what the hell just happened?

Their jaws kind of fall. It's like the bleachers thing, you know.

The one in the center, however, is rent

unconscious. Yeah, that's what, dude.
Elven magic. Elven power.

Elven

strength!

Elven magic! Alright,

finishing there, go. That brings us now to Zusari's turn, who you were holding up for your guys, United States.
Yeah, Soldier Storm. Sensei, Soldier Storm.
Yep. Let's do it.

18.

Mine is 12.

So you guys are going to have to do a lot cooler than us. Oh, yeah.
So both. We didn't do the unbalanced thing because we did the.

That's right. Yes.
So because you use your tag, you're going to roll it. That's a two.
So you are unbalanced. That's me, so I'm unbalanced your next turn of card.
Okay. All right, all right.

All right, so anyway, both of you, go ahead and roll damage. Roll our damage.
And then add 2d12 to the total. Okay.

That's

17.

Plus a 1d12 here, and I'll give you 1d12 over there.

Ooh, no, that's it. Nope, that's wrong.
Wrong die.

And then I add, you said 2d12? Add 1d12. Yeah, one.
No, 1D. One for each of you.

So

with mine, it's 17.

That one, yeah. You got it.

I was waiting for you.

Just go for it. Go for it.
Go for it. Go for it.

It's 22 points of damage for me.

And I have 20. Alright, that's 42 points across the field.
So, yeah, you got a one at one. Because I rolled an 18, is that a crit at all?

For the purposes of the unites, critting is not possible.

But for normal attacks, that is. Okay, so we'll get to either side of this.
I'll get the look. I'm going to go up and down.
You go down. We'll just get that figure eight.

Yeah, let me, I want to like do a thing where I like jump off your back.

Can I do that? And I'll land on one side and you got the other one? Yep. Okay.
All right, here we go. He jumps up and then I'm going to hit it high.
You hit it low.

Both of them just go flying 15 feet in opposite directions,

skidding and then coming to a stop in the mud, leaving a big old slide trail. And then it's just...
quiet. The rest of the wolves that were behind encroach turn around,

kind of bark at each other. Yeah, get out of here.
Scatter off into nearby scrublands and fields. Scram! I'm like doing tricks, my boomerang.
Yeah, you don't want any of this.

We got him, Mabel.

Oh, hell yeah.

Damn, I saw everything that just happened. That was crazy.
Stash my bow.

Whoa, that was cool. Yeah, we did really good.
Yeah, you did good. What? Everybody here's so cool.
Yeah. Good job, everybody.

I'm really impressed. Yeah, as am I.
Yeah. It's like some camaraderie building, right? Are you okay? I'm bleeding a little bit.
Yeah, let me help you. Oh, thank you.
I am going to heal Zasari for...

I'm going to use one of my medicine slots. Okay.

And heal for 40 HP. How kind of you, Pips.
Thank you. You got it.
Is everyone else looking good? I'm feeling good? Great. Yeah, I'm nine down.
You're five down. I think that's all we got.
Hey!

Flesh wound.

Hey! We'll hear a voice echoing from a far five human voice. It's calling out to you.
That doesn't sound like a dog. No, just leave it alone.

Oh, come on, people. We're not like that.
You hear something? You hear somebody in the dress? Keep going. No, no, too bad.
Too bad. We're going in the lower edge.
I can write that down.

Turn this card around. No, who's a Jay? Stop it, man.
What's up? What's going on over there? Hold up, hold up.

And you see as from one of the other hills, like hiding low, a head picks up, and you see a man with like a hood and like a cloak who's also been kind of keeping out from the rain.

It's starting to lighten up a little bit. It's more of just like a gentle storm end as the clouds are starting to break in the distance.

But you see a man with like a pack on who kind of gets up from the hill and starts kind of jogging over to the rest of you.

We're still moving, right? I'm slowing down, dogs. We know that by accident.

No, that was fine work, let me tell you. That was

these are dangerous realms here.

I mean, I was riding a horse back from New City, and unfortunately,

they got my animal, so I've kind of been on foot for a minute. Yeah.
Oh, I am so sorry for the loss of your horse. Dude, stop.
I can see it. We can barely hear this guy.
Sure, yeah, by all means.

He pulls the hood back a bit. Yeah, do you mind slowing down a second? Dude, stop.
This is so rude what's happening. Keep your cardio up.
It's good for you. Okay, okay.
He's still running alongside.

Pulling the hood back. Hi, so anyway.

You see as he pulls the hood back, you see a man in his like mid-30s or so, short brown hair, brown eyes.

He has like a heavy travel cloak that's kind of like pushing back now as he's running.

And you can see he has like denim workers' pants on, thick boots, and kind of an orange vest over a colored white shirt beneath.

And he's kind of rushing up. All right, hand up.
Hand up.

Hang on a minute. Hang on just a minute.

I'm going to help pull him up. What's your name? Alex, what's your name?

Mary.

You're too young to be this untrustworthy. Get this guy up here.
Come on.

What's he gonna do? What's he gonna do? We don't even know who he is.

He's fine. There's enough room.
Just told you, my name's Alex.

Well, I was heading back home from Muse City.

Couldn't where is your home, Alex?

It's the White Deer Inn, not far from here. Actually, it's funny.
I just

couldn't help but watch you dispatch those creatures with quite a capability. And I take it you all are trained.
Yeah, well, kick-ass. You live in an inn?

Me and my family, yeah. Yeah, inns.
People live innovative. It's where you like stay for like a night.
Yeah, but somebody's got to actually live there. My wife runs the inn.

Oh, you run the inn. Oh, we own it.

Oh, wait, what is it called again? It's called the White Deer Inn.

Oh, yeah, the White Deer Inn.

What's your wife's name? Her name is Hilda.

Your kids? I had a kid.

What is with you in the 20 questions? Listen,

I don't know this guy. This is a stranger, and therefore,

you know this guy, Richard. Would you like something? You know about Hilda.
You know his, you know about his wife. Come on.
I know Hilda. It's totally.
I've never met Alex. I understand.
And

you have every right to just be careful around these times, especially. You know, there's, I know it's

there's tension in the air all around right now. We're not that far away from hopefully signing some piece of paperwork, but until then, everyone's going to try and make a little bit of cash.

Which, speaking of,

oh boy, here we go.

I happen to be a little bit of what you'd call a treasure hunter. So, um...

Heard that before.

See,

my wife and I, we, uh, we purchased this charming inn that I told you about not too long ago, and, uh, uh,

there's an opportunity here that I'm wondering if you might be able to

help with.

Should you be interested in making yourself a bit of renown and a little bit of poch on the side? Perhaps. Barnaby's a treasure hunter as well.
I am. Could I offer you an aware? Really?

Maybe you could.

Buy a wear from Barnaby. I do.
Here.

You know what? I have just the thing.

I hold up a spoon and has a little root on it. And I'm like, see?

That is a beautiful spoon. This is a screaming spoon.
When you put it in hot soup, it screams.

Would you like one?

It is a very fascinating thing to experience.

If you don't take it, can we talk about that? Because that sounds dope. How much? How much? How much?

Like 60 potch?

We accept Leo.

Clearly you understand that we're looking for Potch with some renown on the side rather than the other way around. Well, there's plenty of potch to be had.

And he goes and he takes a handful of coins and puts them in your hand and takes the spoon and goes,

Pete will probably find that kind of fun. Thank you kindly.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, count that. Count that real quick.
Yes, of course. It's 60 potch.
It's 60 botch. Hopefully you have a good price.

We have to write an invoice. I've never done that before.
No. All right.
Thank you.

Thank you. My son will probably find that quite a lot of fun.

It's screening.

Like, blood-curdling. It's just magic.
Hey, all sales are final.

Okay.

Well,

so, and you see, he looks got a little tensely awkward at the rest of the shoe here.

Yeah, he's like,

hi. Yeah.

Anyway,

we bought this in,

and we discovered shortly thereafter that behind it

is some ruins, particularly of the Sindar variety. That was all this time.

Anyone know of this Sindar? Tell me about the Sindars. What's going on with that? They're young.
Yes, Mabel doesn't know anything about the Sindar.

I've been doing a lot of this soldiering and everything, but I ain't never heard of the Sindars.

Strange for her enough to not know about the Sindar, but...

Sorry, I just wanted to say that. Mabel, listen,

I've been away from the elves for so long, I forgot all the news. I've been living with humans for like 20-something years.
No, Valid, I should not have presumed. That's on me.
No,

the Sindar, as far as my research has known, and it's known in some places, more of a mythology, but there is historical record of their existence. They're an ancient race,

possibly even before humans came to this land.

They were known for their advanced knowledge of runes and magic.

Oh, I don't want to. I don't fuck with that.
All right.

You're asking us to go over there? No, they're gone now. They've been gone for a long time.
The Sindar vanished to the historical record and are now but stories in the land.

But one of their ruins is in our backyard, and it's sealed, best I can tell.

I've hunted a few treasures in my time, but I understand my limits as an individual, as some of these Sindar ruins, which they've left scattered throughout all the various realms as they meandered nomadic for the time that they were here until they eventually found their eternal city or disappeared, whichever the myth is you've heard.

But these ruins are often built to contain something powerful, something special, something worth quite a lot of money to certain particular

political interests.

So, if you would be interested in being my hired

ruin adventuring troop, to find a way into these Sindar ruins, to get to the heart of it and what it might be holding, and bring it back. One, I'll let you keep whatever you find along the way.
Okay.

Two, I should hope so.

You can stay at the inn for free. I'm sure Hilda will make a grand meal.

And three,

I'll pay you all 15,000 pots. You can stay.

Like, eat? How about that?

Oh, as a troop, you can distribute amongst yourselves. Oh, my God.
You're making us do our own math here. Remember the rule, everyone gets everything equally.
Of course.

If you wouldn't mind, we would like to talk amongst ourselves and i'll turn around

but i will be honest that is the first thing i sold in quite some time and so i need the money so i'm down i'm also all of you are like easily six months or more behind on your dues for the for the arena so yeah for my training ring so honestly this could just help everybody else you're not you're fine

you're fine okay i'm not i'm not naming names i do owe i wasn't gonna name names it could have been every anybody it's okay

but uh yeah no Look, I come into your gym for free because that's just how I roll. And you can thank him for allowing you to do that.

Yes, well, well, when I come into your gym, I bring a little bit of prestige. You have an elf in your gym, number one, and a banner.
I come to the gym all the time, and she is a very dynamic.

And I have you too. It's really nice.
I'm cooler, obviously.

I've got curb appeal when I'm inside, all right? I've heard you barge in. I've heard every time you always walk past everybody.
Yeah, because I want everyone to know that I'm there.

That's what I'm saying.

Yes. We'll take the job.
Yeah, yeah. Fantastic.
Great. I'm excited to do business with you all.

Go ahead and change your trajectory with your cart a little ways west of here.

You know, you know, they're supposed to actually disclose that you have Sundar ruins before you buy a piece of property, so you could probably just probably do something about that.

That's what I'm trying. That's a whole issue.
Well, he'd be right in with the entire

time. I assume so.
I'm horseless, and honestly, this is a lot. He kind of looks outside.
The rain's actually kind of let up now.

He's like, oh, I guess it's getting drier out there, but it's still muddy across these fields, if you don't mind. Oh, not at all.
One question: do you have snacks? We were very hungry.

Looks around at the rest of you.

I have a bit of tack and jerky. Yeah, some of that.

All right, all right.

Pulls out like a small cluster, like a pouch of various dry things that just immediately get torn out of his hand. How much money did you say you have? I have 60 of it.
Oh, my God. 60 it is.

Oh, yep. I that's

no.

I thought

you were offering

a trade. I literally pulled it out of my pocket and you took it from me.
But you know, we're business partners. No, you can have it.
It can free charge.

All right, now. So generous.

I think this guy's not.

When they don't eat, the kids get very angry. I really appreciate that.
No, that's cool.

Anyway,

so.

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Pushing onward as the kind of afternoon continues on, eventually you come to the exterior of the dense forest that sits outside the mountain range that kind of marks the eastern border of this part of Jostin.

You can see that eventually you have to kind of step out of the cart and hitch the horses to the side a bit as the road becomes a little bit too narrow for the entire cart to get there.

But it doesn't take you too long before you come to the exterior of a well-maintained wooden fence, this quaint little perimeter structure that self-encircles this equally quaint, modest, two-story inn crafted of stone and shingle roof.

Beams of sunlight break through parts of the nearby tree canopy, kind of bringing a cozy glow to the flower boxes that sit beneath the windows.

The sounds of a drove of pigs nestled in the shade nearby

catch your ears as they scavenge through the nearby grounds and mud for food. You see a white and brown cat that's settled up on top of the edge.
It's paws kind of over over the edge.

It's kind of looking at all of you.

Alex

kind of skids up the tune. Alex goes,

all right. Well, welcome to my home, the white deer in.

Damn, this is your place?

Well, it's our place. Quite nice.
Thank you. Thank you.
Gee, whiz, can we stay with you? That was part of the deal.

Right. Yes.

Got the 60 pots still, right? I do, yes. Okay, do you want some? No, no, no, we're good.
I just wanted to make sure we... We really needed the jerky.
Thank you. I really needed it.

Okay, well, there's plenty more with that. Do you hear the door

open and you see a woman step out? What you presume to be Hilda. A woman in her 30s, long brown hair that's pulled back other than a few strands that kind of frame the sides of her face.

A gentle face with a smile that brightens around her brown eyes as she rushes towards Alex.

Alex, and just kind of puts her arms out and he kind of picks her up and lifts her and you see them kind of spin in place for a bit. And she's like, I was so worried.

You were two days behind when you said you'd be back. And Alex says, I know, I know.

The weather's been a bit rough and had a bit of a run-in with some of these, you know, the dangerous denizens of the open plains, but lost

I lost Jamie in the process. I'm just like, oh, well, we'll find a new horse and just kind of pats him on the cheek.
Who names their horse Jamie?

Dude, wait, he brought us into here, alright? Be nice. I don't trust them.
All right. I'm getting weird vibes.
You're getting weird vibes. I don't know why.
Whatever.

It was Mabel that chill went on this. This is cheesy as hell, dude.

It's a human to name you. You think these two are capable of being sneaky? They are too nice.
Okay. As she kind of pulls away from Alex, and she's wearing like a simple red dress, the white apron.

She turns and goes like,

and these are...

They're our guests.

They've come to help us

with our ruins. And they've been hired, contracted to be part of my entry team into this mysterious, possibly very beneficial endeavor.
And she goes, okay, well, welcome. I'm Hilda.

Welcome to our inn. You're welcome to stay.
I, and she does like a quick count. We don't have any other guests at the moment, so I'll prepare a meal for eight.

Oh, a meal. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven.

Who's the eight? In memory of the horses.

At this point, you hear

on the roof, kind of climbing down by where the cat is.

You see a little boy, probably no older than seven or eight years old, kind of like, kind of skits down on the edge and scoots up and puts his legs over the edge.

Kind of looks at you all, waves his hand.

I wave back.

That'd be Pete. Pete is the eighth.
He goes, hi. Hey, Pete.
Hello, Pete.

Greetings, Pete.

Who are you?

Well, I'm Barnaby.

That's Barnaby. I'm a wandering trader.
You want to see his wares? He has a spoon.

You have a scary face.

Oh, well.

Let me tell you, I have better wares than a face. Let me grab something out of here.
I bring out a spoon. This is a spoon.
The spoon is for me. Oh, yes, you have a spoon.

Well, you're going to have a spoon, and I'll gesture towards the fire. What's the spoon? Alex goes, oh, right.

Yeah.

Bought you a spoon. It says a noisemaker.

Honey, could you get some hot tea prepared for everybody? Boiling hot. Boiling hot tea for everybody.
She goes, of course, of course. Pete, come to Navajo.
It's not safe.

And she kind of rushes off to get the ladder, and he kind of kicks his legs off the edge. She goes,

it's good to have people over. Welcome.
Yo, I don't think she likes just being here. I'm going to be honest with you.
Do people not usually come?

As she kind of darts in the side, Alex, who's kind of getting his pack off the cart, goes, no, we get folks traveling in and out, but you know, usually they're military troops moving up and down the edge of the

Jouston perimeter. But times being what they are, it's been probably a few weeks since we've seen any extra punch, which is why this is an opportunity.

Come on inside.

Oh boy, this is getting...

This is getting better and better. I'm starting to be on your side a little bit.

I offered to help with the ladder to help get Pete down from the... Easily enough to do it.
Pete comes down and you all eventually gather head inside where the hearth itself is

kind of crackling in the edge. It's kind of warm interior, especially against kind of the somewhat soaked travel that you've done here at the Sarah.
On the inside, it is just a nice, beautiful...

Inn. The two tables that sit out there have gentle cloths over them

as well as

countertop the front where you see where the kind of the clerical work is done of the inn. As Hilda is behind there currently and getting silverware and kind of set the table.

Pete goes and runs up and helps her and starts arranging, getting the different things around the table.

And Alex goes and takes his boots off and kind of like twists them over to get the rest of the soaked rainwater to pour out on the front porch. But it is a welcoming, soft,

gentle little inn. Hey, Pete, you want to see a giant hammer? What? Yo, this thing's huge.
Check it out. That's so big.
Yeah, try to pick it up.

Can I dad? I was like,

sure, I buy you a screaming spoon. Why not? Let's...
Is that all right? And he'll go, like,

outside, maybe. Maybe just show me.
Honey, is that a problem? It's like, he's not going to lift it, honey. And Pete goes...

Ah, look at him. He can't lift it.

It is a large hammer. His alarms are so tiny.
It's okay, Pete. I can barely lift the hammer.
When you're stronger. When I'm stronger.
stronger.

If you work hard. If you work hard, you can lift that hammer.
It's just going to take time, and you have to be consistent.

And you have to train, do your cardio, a little bit of strength. Training.
What's cardio? Well,

you don't need it.

It's boring. Also, a membership at a wonderful little dojo.
It doesn't hurt. He runs it.
It's very good. He'll just let you in for free if you just come in.
Let's not trivial bargain.

Only the first one. I can barge.
See?

Clearly, already running the wrong day. I love ACAD

Yes,

you get sent to

poverty.

Up the stairs, there's

by all means. Yeah, you get yourselves comfortable.
There's upstairs bedchambers set for the evening,

and then eventually, as you kind of get yourself settled and your stuff put aside, there's kind of a washroom where you can go ahead and take off a lot of the travel and muck that's kind of gathered upon all of you.

And a nice warm dinner greets you in the chambers below.

It's, you know, not a vast spread, but it is is welcome, warm bread.

There's some, you know, fine salted meats.

There's a number of freshly picked vegetables and fruits that have been gathered probably from nearby gardens that you kind of got a glance at as you entered the premises of the white dairy.

We saw a garden out earlier. It was pretty crazy.

Well, that would be, we grow these here ourselves. I hope you enjoy them very much.

How do you protect against like the rabbits and stuff?

She kind of looks over at Alex for a second.

Well, if you put a a few traps out, that also is where we get our mutton. And she points over at one of the other bowls that has like a mutton stew.

Oh, dang, look at that.

Very efficient.

You guys got a good operation going on here. You know, there are worse places to be.
It's definitely a step up from where we used to live.

And Alex kind of pats him on the shoulder and she goes, Honey, can we have a conversation? Enjoy your dinner, friends.

Oh, trouble in paradise over here.

Thank you. The two of them kind of just head upstairs for a bit.

I want to follow and listen. Okay.

Alright.

Go ahead.

Pip, wait. Oh, wait, hold on.
I'm going to go pee. Okay, all right.
If you find anything, take it. I will.
Don't break any pots unless there are anything else. No, I just have to.

I'll be right back. Is she going to snoop? Pips has to use the restroom.

Can you let her use the restroom? Thank you.

Alright, so you, I need you to roll a dexterity roll for me. So roll your 20 at your dexterity bonus

to see if you can quietly follow behind unnoticed.

Um.

12.

12?

Okay.

You quietly head up the stairs. The wooden steps themselves kind of like

creaking under your foot.

You're a light elf, but not light enough for

an old wood step to not notify your presence.

But as you get to the very top of the landing of the second floor you can hear them talking they have not seemed to take notice of your presence yet um they've moved into their side kind of master bedchambers uh the door is slightly ever so faintly ajar and you quietly get up to the edge of it and you could hear hilda's like look our alex is talking to hilda and he says it's all right honey we've traveled quite a bit they

seem a bit

uh

scattered in ways, but I've seen them fight. They're quite talented.

They have eyes for intrigue, and I think, honestly, I'll take whoever can help at this point. And she goes,

honey, look,

I know this is a dream of yours,

but is it safe?

I mean, the more we try and push this, I'm afraid it's going to try and convince Pete to try and step further than me, allow him within the woods. And I mean, you don't even know how to get inside.

She's like, he turns back to her. I know, I know, but, you know, they're quite worldly bunch.
bunch They've been around and we'll we'll find a way in I'm sure and we'll look

We need the money We need to get a better place for all of you need to get you some new clothes

It's gonna be fun. It's gonna be fun.
Trust me

Yo, this mutton's really good and then you put it in the tea. Do you hear it? Do you hear the scream? Dude, that's crazy.

How did you do that?

I like that it actually

isn't. It's actually just, it just sounds like it's angry and dragging.
Yeah,

I wish I bought it for 60 potch.

Oh, yeah, even spoon lady. We're working on pricing.

But eventually, kind of like

they kind of come to an awkward quiet where she's like, just be careful, okay?

And if it's still sealed and you can't find a way in, you're okay to just walk back. And he's like, of course, yeah.
I mean, that's the whole point of this.

Anyway, I'm going to go check out him. He starts moving towards the door.
I start trying to go down the stairs. Roll one more dexterity.

Oh, yay.

I'm so excited.

That's a natural one.

I'm just gonna stand there.

You stand there at the door? Yeah, and he goes, I'm gonna open the door and be like, oh, I'm so sorry. I thought, was this the bathroom? No, no, this is our bedroom.
I'm very sorry.

How long have you been there? I just, I was, I just walked up here. Are you a are you a Snoop as well as an adventurer? Can I hear the no can I hear them talking upstairs?

You know what?

I'll say based on the food and conversation. Roll you 20 for me.

We are allowed. 16? 16, yeah.
You hear a little bit of ruckus.

I hear like a little bit of the conversation and I

step up to sort of save Pip from the situation. So I'm going to try to be like...

Pip, did you find the bathroom okay? I no, I just walked into their bedroom. I'm so sorry.
Oh, he's like,

I'm really sorry. He sighs, and Hilda kind of comes up on her shoulder and is like, it's fine, it's fine.
Yeah, the water closet's right down the hall there to the left. Thank you.

We only have one for all of you, so you have to take turns, but it's well kept and well-maintained. Got it.
Thank you very much. Right behind them.
Yo, is this where I piss?

Yes, right down the left. Right on the left.

Okay. Did you go already? I haven't yet.
I do have to go.

Pete comes up.

I want to piss too.

And Hilda goes, Pete, don't say that word. Oh, boy.
Piss?

I got a piss. Man, this kid rules.
Piss. Yes.

Alex's face palms hardened Hilda's like,

I'm glad you brought your friends here.

I'm sitting across from Teddy, like putting a kind of like a carrot through the slot under my helmet as it just like contoniously got up. And I go, we're not good people, are we?

We're not the worst. And I'm going to just take a carrot off the and also.

Oh boy, these kids.

I

go to Pete and Hilda and I, like, a deep bow. Like, please excuse my friends.

We may be a rambunctious bunch, but our hearts are in the right place, and we deeply, deeply appreciate your hospitality so far. She smiles and softens, like, oh, I no need to be so formal.

We're happy to host you and just promise you'll... be safe.

Don't get too far into things you don't understand.

If things get too hairy, just come back.

And Pete pops up and says, Don't forget to piss.

We will not forget to piss, Pete. Thank you.
Okay, you can stop saying it now because she won't go in and I need to go. So, can we get this going already?

Lila Light puts her hand around Pete's mouth and covers like,

It's bedtime for you, Pete.

We'll see you all in the morning.

I'll have breakfast up and early before you trek out. Oh, yeah.
And if you need anything, just rap at our door and let me know. And she likes to know where your door is now.
Very sorry.

It's all right. And she ducks into the room, and Alex heads downstairs.
And just kind of while the rest of you are waiting for whatever line you're gonna take to the restroom.

I'm just gonna go right now. We're all standing around.
I'm going in.

Thank you.

All right. So the evening progresses.

Alex is downstairs kind of having a small tankard of like a half-filled ale of some kind. And

he's just kind of thinking.

His eyes are locked in a distant stare of something far off from the interior that he's facing and as you all kind of come back downstairs to finish up your meal you kind of glance over and it's like

hey I just I gotta say I I appreciate

I appreciate that you're all putting the trust into this opportunity for all of us I think this can be a really great thing

I see you have a bit of contemplation happening right now and is there anything we should know before we get into this

uh well i've cleared out most of the brush to the front of it and i've found the front of it but it's

best i can tell blocked or sealed or maybe it's not even an entrance maybe it's just a an art piece i've gone back and forth to a number of the various libraries and cities all throughout this region and looked up everything i can about the syndar and it's all just bits and pieces uh but nothing specifically about this a lot about like the runes and like

i guess there was the leader of the sindar at the time was cursed by the rune of change which is one of the 27 true runes which is something i don't even really kind of understand to be honest but uh

a lot of talk about a universal struggle between order and chaos and runes that shape the world as we know it and

i don't know i that's kind of beyond my pay grade i'm gonna be honest but like

Nothing about the symbols I've seen here.

So, I figure first thing in the morning we get our food, we head over to this front gate, we see if there's something I'm missing here.

Maybe we walk the perimeter, see if there's another way in, maybe there is another entrance that I haven't found. You know,

I'm just one man, but together, we are six very talented people.

Six very talented people who don't know how to open the door to this place.

Well, later on.

How many times have you attempted to open the door?

Almost daily for about three years. Okay, oh, what have you tried? I mean, I've I've

tried singing to it, I've tried pushing it as hard as I can. Open Sesame, try that one.

No,

but we could try that. That's a pretty good one.

Uh, some parts of it seem to slide or move, but uh, nothing that I'm quite picking up on. I don't know if it's just decoration or if there's some trick to it.

Uh, I begun digging deeper along the sides, and the walls of the ruin just keep going, dug into the stone and the hills. So this is a big, it's a big place.

So there could be alternative ways in, but you know, nothing that I feel comfortable going too far in on my own. I can hear things scratching around on the other side of those walls.

Has anything in your studies led you to have any knowledge of what may be inside the ruins?

Of course you said there's treasure, but what kind of maybe you heard scratching creatures could live in there that we should be aware of?

Well, people who have been to other Sindar Sindar ruins have spoken that they build them to protect magnificent secrets, right?

And to keep them protected, they often build dangerous challenges, traps, and

perhaps even seal-in denizens to wander and proliferate within the walls.

So that is why I'm paying you quite a bit of poch

to go and see where it goes.

This is what all the training has been for. Things like this, encounters, getting stronger, putting your skills to the test.
This is going to be great.

It's going to be good for the body, the mind, the soul. I already feel rejuvenated.
Imagine all the things we could find. Like a magic thing.
That you could sell. That I could sell.
There it is.

That would be wonderful. Yes.
How wonderful. This spoon, by the way.

Terrifying. Terrifying.
Oh, I'm so glad you got it off my thumb. Don't you love it? It's great.
Hey, Scurdy.

Would you like. Maybe I have another one.
We'll find it. In there.
maybe.

If you find a Sindarin screaming spoon, I bet you I know a few people in New City that'll pay a premium for that. Wow.

Premium. I'll write that down.
Just saying. I'm just saying.

But no. This is still the same night, right? Yeah, just like later into the evening.
Okay, so I'm a little drunk.

You are a tiny child.

And I'm like, listen.

I don't mean to be pedantic or anything, but people don't build ruins, okay?

They build buildings and then they become ruined. So I just want to, you know, I want to make sure that we're talking correctly over here.
No, that's that's entirely valid.

That's you say you don't want to

call it former buildings. Just I do like that.
If you're gonna say you built the ruins, it's like just say something else, you know what I'm saying?

He does another drink after his third stein as well, and he's like, look, I know it's pedantic and all that, but like, it's just a figure of speech.

It's the ease in which one can express specifics become ruins over time because it's not a proper building in our age right

god this guy just stir the screaming spoon all right oh wonderful

all right i'll do that gets excited and gets up and like

takes way too long putting like a pot on the fire waiting for it to heat up as the kettle starts like whistling

is awesome

i have many more things to keep my head at the whole time look at this it's a mirror it tells you how good you look you look good there are a couple light footsteps down the stairs as pete comes down like is someone playing with my spoon He's like, go back to bed, go back to bed.

That's not your playing, Pete. Just screaming.
Just screaming.

I am sentient. I feel things.

And I like

alcohol and I put it in the nearest cupboard I can find. Yeah.

Wait, the booze goes.

I think you're driving. But you seem to be all out.
Isn't that interesting? It's been such a long night. We're all, it's, I think that when the booze is gone, it's time to go to sleep.

Oh, I feel that. All right, yeah, no, I'm feeling a little good.
Hey, where's that bathroom again? Upstairs on the left. Here, I'll walk you.
I'm going up there anyway.

I start knocking on your bedroom.

Hilda kind of opens the door.

Excuse me? Oh, sorry. I didn't know you were in there.

I'll wait. Alex, come to bed.
And she

down

the hall that way. Alex goes that way, that way.
Oh, okay, okay. Sorry.

Eventually, you all go to your chambers, and in various states of restful sleep or drunken stupor, whichever your choice may be,

certainly a variety of unique dreams find you.

Everything Everything from flashes of memory interpreted through the veil of recent events to possibilities of what lies beyond, or even so, maybe just images, images that even you yourself might be trying to suss out as to what purpose or fate it calls you towards.

But then,

as quick as you thought, The morning comes.

As the sun rises and the sound of birds chirping in the surrounding forest and the green boughs of the trees that cluster and cover the top begin to whistle and carry you into the morning hour.

You all begin to slowly come to consciousness as the smell of a fresh breakfast draws you to the floor beneath.

There, Hilda, with Pete's help, has prepared a fine series of sunny-side up eggs, some remainder of the slices of meat that have been kind of fried up,

as well as some toasted bread and some additional provisions that have been packed and wrapped for your journey into the ruins themselves. Kind of set aside.
Alyssa's, good morning, everyone.

Please enjoy the breakfast as it would. And

she looks over to Alex.

Just before you leave, make sure you say goodbye. And you see Alex like putting on his boots and getting his stuff.
Oh, of course, honey, of course.

And he gets a little short sword and kind of puts it on his belt. He pulls it out, and it looks at it.
It is undamaged, perfectly, freshly purchased. And he kind of holds it like, oh,

sheathes it, locks it onto his belt. All right, this guy's staying in the back.

Very reassuring.

Everybody's carb loaded. You know, you're going to be ready for the day.
It's going to be kind of intense. We may have to run.
We may have to fight. Mabel, how are you feeling? Not so loud.
Oh, okay.

All right. Wonderful.
That's a good thing before we put our lives on the line.

Right.

Technically, we carb loaded last night. Now maybe it passes over into the next day.
Look, have you seen how small I am?

I was thinking that last night. Yes, I think you were actually warned a couple of times by sensation.
I think that's a good discussion for this moment.

I don't think you recall, though, do you? Listen, I mean, if it's in front of me, I'm going to drink it. What's my name?

Oh, yeah.

Buddy.

Eventually, you all gather your supplies and things together.

Alex goes and kisses Hilda and kind of rubs Pete's head a little bit and says, all right, loves, hold the fort down.

We'll be back here in a jiffy and hopefully, with something very cool to show for it.

Yeah, and Pico's like, and Hilda kind of smiles and sighs and kind of looks over at the rest of you and says, keep them safe.

How much do you usually charge for people to stay in your inn?

It's about 70 pots a person for an evening's rest. Oh, man.
We're screwed. Wait, didn't we just stay here for the moment? Oh, we're not charging them.
You are charging me. Oh, my God.

I know it was part of the deal, but you really did a nice thing for us. Thank you.

Well, you're doing a nice thing for us, too.

You're uh

helping ensure a future for these folks.

We'll do our best, won't we?

Yes, we'll do our best. Yes, we'll do our best.
Yeah, you told us not to do anything less than 110%. I don't hear to do good one.
I'm going to write a lot of people. I don't usually do this.

That's that's that's

good one, yes. But um, free of charge,

and I'll bring out like a little jar and a lid. There's nothing in it.

This is

an item I've had in my collection for some time. It is.

I'm sorry, magical in some way.

It is. It's okay.
Getting it away from us. I know.
I know.

It is a jar that cannot be opened, and I want you to have it.

Can I try opening it? I need to try and open it right now. Don't open that magic jar, you guys.
But it can't be opened. I must test it.
Come on, I can't deal with this. It's early in the morning.

Take care.

You hand it over. Hilda takes it and goes,

thank you.

Pete goes,

and he grabs it and is like,

trying to get the jar open. It really can't be opened.

It's going to haunt me.

As you all

begin to step out, you gather your supplies and cloaks over it, and Alex kind of hits alongside you.

All right, I'll show you where the ruins are. Y'all take care.

Love you both. And Hilda goes, goodbye.
Stay safe. And Pete goes, don't forget to piss.

Don't open that jar.

An hour later, you hear a horrible explosion in the distance.

I said, before we leave, I take the deepest bow I can for the both of them. Your forehead touches the ground.

And Hilda gives a nod too, and Pete then also gets on the ground too and kind of matches your bow and as you both pull to answer. He's like, such a respectful bow you have, Pete.

yeah i learned from the best

we'll be back very soon thank you please please do be come back with treasure treasure sits up and hold it kind of rustles ahead of it and goes

take care

as you all shuffle off into we'll take care of them

she nods you shuffle off into the woods kind of to the north side where the wooden perimeter gate opens and you can see now the thick brush of the forest ahead, part of it cleared open, the shade kind of just keeping it nice and cool this early in the morning.

A low fog kind of wrestle, kind of slowly settles into the region.

And as you begin to push forward, the little bits of light kind of peeking through,

about three, four minutes of walking and travel, taking in the sounds of nature around you, the fog gets thicker and thicker until eventually you begin to see the first shape of what looks like a stone pillar, just the out dark line of it, and then another.

You begin to see the grass and dirt floor begins to give way to patches of what looks almost like smooth stone, carved and settled together intently.

Pillars line what looks like a familiar pathway to an ancient time. Parts of the pillars crumbled and fallen and kind of left to piles of debris.

And as you can step around them and follow Alex, eventually you see the large, ominous stone shape of some ancient structure, itself heavily overgrown with vine and branch and bough just kind of wrapped around it.

You can see areas where the rocky cliffs at the base of the mountains kind of wrap and kind of grasp it from all sides.

And there, as you approach the front, you can see there are two massive stone statues, feminine in form, almost human-like, but features still hard to quite recognize.

Swathed in a heavy robe and hooded. You can just see like the lower part of their faces.
Somewhat humanoid, but hard to place.

Their arms up, holding the archway top of the roof that makes the beginning of this massive temple.

And there you see what looks like a 10-foot by 10-foot double-sided doorway, where a massive circular glyph-like stone relief is embedded into it, intricately carved with all manner of strange lines and shapes.

It's almost like

some odd mathematical equation is forever placed sourcelessly and without particular pattern into this stonework long ago, and here it sits, dried brown roots and vines that have clawed up and climbed over it, most of them kind of torn away upon the center part of the relief.

And as you all begin to step under an approach, Alex goes,

here it is. Welcome to the Sindar Ruins.
This is beautiful. It's beautiful.
You know, they just, they don't make ruins like this anymore.

They don't make ruins. That's what I'm trying to say.
Well, they're buildings first, right? Yes. Former buildings, as Mabel would have to do.
They don't make former buildings.

Welcome to the Sindar former buildings, if that makes you feel better. I'm going to go up to the to the front to the door.

It is hard stone that is so solid or thick that you don't hear any echo get through. It's just your knuckles hitting unmovable surface and it kind of hurts your knuckles and the impact.

I gotta be honest, that was a good move. Yeah, I just figured

I know. I figured maybe you didn't try knocking.
I don't know. Weirdly,

many times, many ways. But also,

always good to double, triple check.

Now, Barnaby and I were chatting. I think open sesame is the way to go.

You were into that open sesame plan, too? Yeah, I could try it.

I want to walk up and try to see if I can make out any of the sigils or whatever. You know, there's like

whatever the glyph on the floor. If I can.

Go ahead and roll with magic. Actually, looking at it, uh

I assume a lot of this is Sindar in script but you know not really much record exists aside from bits and pieces of higher learning what do I roll is that a ton of roll d20 and your magic 15 15 and I don't have any magic okay 15

how do you say open sesame and Sindar oh I uh that was better logistical concerns oh thank you

no uh uh you look about

if

everything in here, so you can tell kind of has some sort of purpose. Everything about this design is intentional, but its scope escapes you.

Okay.

Can I uh

can I also investigate the the women the women

statues like holding up the are they holding up the door or are they they're holding up like the the upper edge of the where the roof begins the rest of the temple progresses so it looks like they're they're designed to look like they're holding the edges of the temple flanking uh both sides of that massive entryway door okay who is she i'm uh i'm gonna just walk up and i'm just gonna take my finger and i'm gonna check these rooms in this big disc yeah i just wanna see if it's one continuous piece of stone like it's carved in or if it feels like this was inset and is in its own entire entirely different piece of stone.

I'm just seeing if there's a mechanism or something.

Yeah, you feel it, run your fingers along it and as soon as you get like partway through one section of the stone like shifts with your movement like it slides along a track and you release it and it it slides back.

I'm gonna slide and hold it.

It stays there where you held it.

Did you find something? I think I did. I think I did.
I'm gonna try and slide to see if I can bring any other pieces.

A few other pieces move, but now that you see it, there's like dozens of individual parts of this that can all slide and as you slide they all send like some of them seem to almost like ever so faintly click as they move.

This is a little bit beyond me, but

I think this is

this is some sort of puzzle to solve. I don't know.

This is not my expertise, but I did

this is clearly, I don't know. I think this is this looks like a lock.
If I were gonna have a magic lock, I would have a magic lock like this. Oh, I don't want to be watching.

Can I I try to like slide uh like slide a like can you hold the one you're

pulling that one? And then can I try to like is there any other ones near his that I can like? There are numerous ones. Like the whole disc itself is probably about eight, nine feet from side to side.

It almost like fully occupies the entirety of these two doors and makes them kind of meet in the center.

So yeah, there's all number of them that you can try and pull around his space, but even so you're limited by the scope of your hands. Right.

Barnaby, you take a look at this. Oh.

See if anything.

well when I traveled south of the south place that I've been at last,

I think I've seen a door or maybe more.

I hold that

story. I do.

Hold that stone

and I go up and I look into the slot that's there and I go open Sesame.

That's a good one. That's a good

job. Well now that that's over with.
This must be a different contraption than the the ones in the south that would make sense. That must be different.

Yeah, oddly the command doesn't have an impact on the mechanism, but it was a good college trap. Thank you.
Is there anything in like the actual slot that's like moved over?

No, there's the glancing at it, it doesn't like there's anywhere to place anything. It looks like just all these various pieces have to be maneuvered in a specific way.

Can I check the

women's statues again? Is there anything like on their person or anything their in their making that i can roll a d20 for me

16.

16.

uh i mean they're they're intricately carved and like while there is weathered wear and tear and you know a bit of like growing uh nature escape that is like slowly crawling up kind of the base of them uh like each of them stands about

10 feet tall like they are larger than the door itself their arms kind of up to the to the uh the roof portion of the temple uh

there's no writing or script on them, per se. They're just there as like ominous guardians in the front of this entryway.

Does it look like if we move

these bits of stone in a particular pattern, there might be a pattern where it creates like a good

break that would let the doors open?

That's possible. If you want to roll a magic check for me.
Oh, God, me. Okay.

Keep trying to get otherwise. This guy about to do magic right now.

That's a nine.

Nine.

You like pull two together, release, and they

slide back. You pull two more together, and then this one, and this one, and this one, and it makes kind of like a happy face.

Hey, look at that. That might be something then.
Let's continue on that.

We probably all have to do it at the same time. Maybe each one of us.

Are you kidding me? Well, how else are we going to get in there, Mabel?

I know you're hoping that. Do you have any magic-protective gloves for Mabel in your?

I do have gloves. I do have gloves.

I will pull out two pairs of black gloves. They're anti-magic.
Suggestion.

I got a big-ass hammer. You know, you carry a hammer long enough, and I know every problem looks like a nail, but maybe you should just not try the hammer.

How many

are there of those?

I mean, at a glance,

three dozen? Oh. Is there anything I have ever come across that would look remotely like something like this? Have you researched anything, Sundaran, in in your past?

I've probably walked by so much and not know what that is like from.

If you'd like to roll a magic check for me, I'm basically I'm allowing each of you to make a magic check as you attempt to figure this out to see if you can ascertain any of the secrets. Dirty 20.

A natural 20. A dirty 20.
Dirty 20. 20 is what you needed.
Oh, okay.

As you are contemplating, you've come across a book, oddly. Like there are all sort of scripts and pieces of Sindarin research that still exist out there.

Most of the books are relegated to places of higher learning.

As to where you came about this one, you can decide.

But you notice that there are,

in Sindaran mathematics, there are patterns of three. And as you begin to look how all these are situated, they're almost like set into trios.

And on every third one, there is an additional kind of divot mark in it. And so you begin to pull each of these third marks and holding them in place.

And as you get three of them pulled in, they click and hold. You get three more pull in, and they click and hold until eventually you go through the full disc.
And when the last one clicks in,

Barnaby! There's a heavy impact, dust knocks free and begins to fall and settle as the doors

begin to open. Barnaby is so cool.

The wall is just like will hit me as it exits out of this dark dungeon, and I'll go, oh, I am terrified. Thank you so much for your encouragement.
I don't know how that works.

I can't believe you did it. I've been trying this.
Thank you.

Wow. Oh, you are already well worth the parch and change.
My goodness. This is incredible.

Well,

let's go in. Come on.

All right. Let's go find you some nails to hit.
Yeah, all right. You all go.
Charge in. From that point, the smell of like musty ancient air kind of filters past you.

And you enter a smaller antechamber with additional pillars along the way. And there is a secondary door that is closed.

and what looks to be some sort of an odd looks like a like a pedestal onto the right of it. And Alex runs up to him and it's like, ah,

okay, this is another mechanism. And you look at it, it looks like some sort of

series of stone buttons and reliefs into like an interface, like a platform. Small buttons are big, or like big, like a series of larger, like inch, inch and a half, and there are different symbols.

And he goes like, ah,

another one.

So

what are we seeing? We're seeing like a platform with a... So, yeah, there's a long hallway with pillars and then there's a doorway at the end of it.

Okay, and then to the right of it is a small kind of

raised pedestal that has these symbols on it.

All right, I know how these things work. This is a trap if we don't get the right thing, okay? So we got to do this right or else we're going to screw this up.

Let's get Alex. So close to this.
After all this time, he gets one freaking door mechanically like leans his elbow on it and then hits something and

the doors begin to open.

It's like,

I meant to do that. That was purely.
That was good. That was good.

See, this is where the collaboration comes in.

This strange, like, twisting, binding sound begins to fill out the air around you as you see the hanging vines that kind of are revealed as the doors open up to the interior of this temple proper.

You can see all manner of layered walls that are massive and tall and bits of overhanging canopy. It is an open-air temple.

But from the vines that hang down, some of them seem to shift as a number of small green shapes

drop down from the vines

and begin to slowly move and shift.

What?

What's that? I take out my bow. You might want to step back for this one.
I cracked my knuckles. What did I tell you guys?

That's okay. That's something you can hit now.
They look like small green pods. Maybe it's the

distance size is a little odd. Maybe not so small.
Maybe about the size of a person or so. And as they kind of move, you see vines kind of

pull it forward towards you until they open up like weird green potted plant creatures. Their mouths open like Venus fly trap kind of terrifying entities.

Their jaws open and these five entities begin to swirl and swarm towards you. I need all of you to roll D20s and add your speed modifiers.

Get up on me.

did

HP reset after night? After the night's rest, you guys got your

any spells back and your HP is full. Oh, I need to go.
Yo, I'm not gonna lie, those things are pretty cool. Oh, look at those.

Oh, oh, my God. Those are so cool.

I rolled a one.

Okay, so you'll be going last.

All right. There we go.
All right, so to that point,

20 to 15. 22.
Ooh, look look at that titty 16

already

uh 16

for

cold uh 15 to 10 oh 12.

12 or 10 oh I'm 10.

Pips, Barnaby.

Oh, yeah. Pips, Barnaby, Zasari.
Yeah. And,

yeah.

And then Mabel.

And Mabel West.

And a smart. Alright, so with that,

as these plant entities are rushing around you, the front row itself filled with them, and two in the back that are kind of at the ready, Teddy, you're up first.

With Pips coming up shortly behind. Well, I'm going to...
Yeah, let's start with the center then. Gonna head straight in, try and dodge left.

I'm gonna see if I can just get this thing right and stain them. Wait, no, it doesn't have one.
I'm gonna get it not in the mouth, but right below. I'll angle it this way so it looks more like the

microphone. There it is.

That feels like sweetening right there. So, front and center.
You got it.

Oh, yeah. That's

21. 21.
What's your crit range? Oh, yeah. 15 to 20.
That's a crit. Don't roll damage and double it.
Yeah. All right.

That's

right. You put it all into luck.

11, 19,

19 would be 20.

27? Doubled. To 50.

Yeah, 54.

Right in there. One inch punch.
Yeah.

One in the middle.

It's like viny arms kind of reaching outward as its terrible, like

plant-like maw opens up, and you can see like kind of the reddish interior where it holds some sort of acidic liquid inside. These little like thorns kind of poking out the sides of it.

And you just rush forward, uncaring.

As you impact, you watch like you hit. And the creature goes like,

and full on, like, you know, a second later gets blasted back and skids

on the ground. Its vines have caught it and pulled it back into place, but you can see its torso is ruined.
Parts of its innards are kind of like spilling out.

It's like green and red elements are kind of like hanging, and it's like

it's time to pull these weeds

writing that one down. You know, that was pretty cool, but maybe work on the lines.

See how you do. Come on,

it's now the creeper's turn. Oh, shit.
So

the three at the front are going to come at all three of you in the front line there with their plant chews. You watch as they come forward and they try and reach out and grab and swallow to chew you.

So first coming towards Mabel. That's going to be a 12 to hit.
What's your evasion? Oh, that's a D20. It's your evasion.

Oh, it's 13. 13? That's a miss.
All right. So it goes towards you.

You just keep low and kick it off. Oh, I just roll around and shit.

One's coming at you, Teddy. I'm too tongue over for this, man.
That's a 12 as well. Now I'm a 13.
13 again. Roll the same thing twice in a row.

So those all miss, and the ones coming towards you, Zasari, that's going to be even lower. It's going to be a 7.
Yep. Yeah, it missed.
That misses you. Mana, all of yours

ducking out of the way. The front rows are not so great.
The back rows, however, are going to use their poison thorn abilities as they kind of reel back and then

fire a barrage of poison nettles that are going to fire off.

One's going to go towards you, Teddy, and one's going to go towards towards you, Barnaby, not back row, because they can do that.

Oh no, I'm allergic to poison. Okay, it's going to be a 13 to hit you.
My evasion's 13. That does hit you.
You take

14 points of damage. Reduced fire to seven.
So another seven.

And you are poisoned. Yeah, yeah.
No!

No!

So you feel like as the thorns hit you, something,

your veins begin to pulse.

And then the ones coming at you, you, Barnaby, that's going to be, that's a terrible roll, eight to hit.

Eleven is my.

You duck out of the way. No damage sustained.
The thorns go flying by and hit the nearby stone wall. No impact.
That finishes the plant turn, but you are poisoned.

It's the top of Pip's turn with Barnaby on deck. All right, I'm going to take a shot of my bow.
Which one are you firing at? I am going to do... Okay, let's see.
You can hit any.

Because you're a bow, you can hit anybody. Yeah, all right, so I'll go for

the one on the left. All right.
Front left. This one? Yes.
Front.

Front left. Yes.
Front left. My left.
My left. Sorry.
Your right. Sorry.

Alright, I don't know if that hits. It's a nine.
A nine? Your evasion is eight. That hits.

All right, Judy.

Alright, alright, alright, alright. So we got 2D 10.

Okay, 8.

Plus 10, 18, plus 8.

26?

No, yeah. That's great.
So 26 points of damage on that first. That arrow strike, shh, it sneaks into the one in the front.

The arrow dives into and you watch like its acidic interior begin to like spill out from the wound. Uh, its vines triangle to close it.
That's a heavy hit on it.

It's already starting to look kind of haggard from the impact. So that finishes your turn there.
That's my turn. That leads us to Barnaby with Zusari on deck.
Wonderful.

Teddy, your veins are turning purple. When we finish this, I want to take that thing out of your skin and keep it forever.

I will throw my boomerang at the one in the middle, because that's that's the one that was hit originally, right? This is the one that that's hurt really bad by 10. I'll try to finish that guy off.

All right, roll for him. Yeah, I'll never two-handed overhead.
Somehow throw a boomerang like down like an axe. Oh, no.

Eight. Wait,

eight.

No, no, eight hits exactly. Eight hits evasion.
Yeah. Barnaby.

15 damage. 15 points of damage.

This one in the front, the boomerang slices through and like carves it into two different pieces that fall to the ground and the vines keep curling for a few more seconds before they eventually they roll still and you watch the green begin to curl into into brown very quickly.

Destroyed. Well done, well done.
Awesome. That finishes your go, Barnaby.

Zusari, you're up.

My taffas are able to hit backline too, right?

They are medium range. I believe.

So

they can only hit the front row. Okay, but I can attack.
You can attack from out that row.

Actually, that's good to know because if you move in back, then if you start to get damage really, yeah, I can back up and still hit the attack. You hit this one on the.

This one's been hit. Yes.
I've got to follow up Pip's attack

and try to like

use my Tompha and hit it so fast that I like sever the head from the stem of the

roll for the attack.

16. 16 hits.
16 hits.

Roll damage.

89. 10.
10 hit. Plus your...
Oh, wait. I hit 16, right?

Was it 12 plus 4? 12 plus 4. Okay, right.

1, 2, 2,

Ten. Ten total.
All you got. So 10 damage on that one.
Crack, crack. Two heavy hits.
It takes the impact. You can see it's like struggling to keep itself

formed together. The part of it's like matter is starting to tear apart, and you can see that the flower parts around its head are like kind of falling off in petals and chunks.

But it's still standing. Just very hurt.
All right, that finishes your go.

What's up, Mabel? Oh, hey. What are those like purple bubbles coming off of you? It's gonna be fine.
It's just gonna take us.

I don't think the eggs were fully hit. He always says it's a flesh wound.

All right, take a seat, all right? Watch how it's done. I'm gonna do the unicorn assault.
Okay, yeah,

left line. That's the one that's been hit already, right? Actually, this one's been untouched.
This one has taken some damage. All right, let's take that line then.
You got it. All right.

So, you who are so good at this hammer,

a spear-based rune's not going to stop you from using it. That's right, baby.

I'm going to spear the F out of these guys.

You just rush forward and swing wide to try and hit that entire row.

Nine. Hey!

Actually, nine still hits them both, yeah.

And then add damage, right? Correct.

14 plus 11

25.

Nice. So

as you rush forward with your hammer, how do you strike both of those in the row? Man, I'm just going like barrel first. Just run.

Straight up. Like, I'm a unicorn, baby.

You impact both of them. The one in the back kind of rolls off and kind kind of catches itself with spines trying to wrap around the hammer as you pull it away.
The one in the front,

the one in the front, you realize it's missing until you look in the front of the hammer and it's just smeared across the front of it. It's no longer functional.
You are a unicorn.

Let's not make it a unicorn.

I love it. I know I have a hard exterior, but my heart is soft.

You opened up so easily.

This one ships into the front row. Teddy, you're up.
All right. Well, the one that just got damaged, I'm going to just try and like see if I can finish that thing off.

So I'm going to come in and see if I can just roundhouse behind it and just nail its head down into the floor. You got it.
All right, that's not the right die. There we are.
Come on. Oh, 12,

16, which is in my crit range. Yeah.

Wow. Okay, I get to.
16 on the dice? 16 on

it was 12 on the dice plus 4. Okay, no, so the crit range is on the 20.

So 16 to hit. 16 does hit.
So not a crit, but it hits.

Eh, it's okay.

14,

22 points of damage. 22 points of damage.

Bam right in the back so you rush forward

you hit it it kind of falls to the ground its vines trying to whip up to wrap around your forearm as you pull backward it gets it back to its feet and it's teetering and you see like parts of its like uh extended like vine heavy leaves that are like curling back into it and starting to blacken it's very heavily i have to take my poison damage you do which is four

eight points of poison damage you take eight points of poison damage at the top of your round like

and it does it it stays there or does it heal or do i have to wait no it stays Oh, yeah. Anyone wanted to cure my poison, I will highly take that.

Are you okay? What the heck's going on over here? Oh my god, I think it was the chicken and the eggs. I think the whole thing was.
I ate both and I'm fine.

You rejected what they thorn. Are you sure it's not the thorn

protruding from your shoulder? What thorn? Oh my god.

I'm not really

holding it.

Oh, now it's spraying. Oh, that's your breath.

Get that away from me, dude. Put it back in.
It's fine.

Oh, God, that was back in the baby frozen again. All right.

The creepers take their turn. The two in the front are going to lash out.
One of them is going to come at you, Mabel, and the other's going to come at you, Zusari. Bring it on.
One against you, Mabel.

It's going to be, oh,

it's going to be a five. Oh, hell yeah.
That's going to miss on that one. It kind of lunges towards you itself.
It just kind of stumbles and hits the ground and looks up at you.

I do like a, like, you know, when you do break dance and you do like the...

You know, I do that. I'm like,

get back up. That one feels a little shamed.
And, like, if a plant could back up and go,

Bones coming towards you Susari. There we go finally a decent roll on my side.
That's gonna be a dirty 20 to hit you. Oh wow, okay.
Yeah

So this one actually it lunges forward and as its mouth opens you try and pull away its vines grab you and it pulls you into its gullet you watch Zusari is swallowed by this creature and it like

chews before you eventually fight your way out and it spits you to the ground. You do take from that attack

18 points of damage.

I was smart. Good job, Susari, for fighting it from the inside out.
You know, I try, yeah, the monsters just don't really like me. I've discovered.

They hate me. The one in the back is going to go ahead and do a poison thorn attack.
This one's going to be at you since you haven't been striked yet. It curls in

and releases this line of

toxic

That's going to be an eight to hit you. What's your evaluation? Narrow it's 11.

You just dug it out of the way, and it like sprays against the wall, exploding, leaving kind of like the toxic venom inside, kind of causing a kind of a Jackson Pollock painting spread on it.

But that's gonna finish the Creepers Go. Pips, you're up with Barnaby on deck.

Take out my bow.

Take out my bow, and I'm gonna shoot the one that's almost almost down. That one, go for it.

All right, we got

that's great. We got a 19.
19 hits. Go roll.
Get him, Pip. We got.

All right, We got a 9 and a 3. We got 12 plus 8.
20. 20 points of damage.

Yes.

You go ahead and strike that one and it kind of crumples backward and you watch as

the somewhat empty interior of its plant gullet kind of folds in on itself, almost like a slowly deflating water balloon and it just lays there on the ground no longer moving. That finishes your go.

Yes. Two more.
Two more. Barnaby, you're up as you sorry on deck.
I'll just hit the one in the front row.

Yeah. Because I know other people can as well.

Sick. Oh, that's going to be 22 to hit.
It was 19 on the die, but my crit range is 20. Yeah.

I know. That's all good.
That does hit, though. Go ahead and roll damage.
Okay, yeah, great.

Sec.

Eight damage. Eight points of damage.

Okay.

Now, these creatures have their own defense, and so you like, you hit it, and it streaks off and it impacts, but it looks like it's deflected.

It's a kind of hardened exterior as it kind of pulls itself in place. It doesn't take as much damage as you do.
That is one thing about my boomerang. It does not do well against plants.

It's never done. I've lost many friends to plants, and it's because of that boomerang.
And I'll surprise it.

Is wood involved in that?

Oh god, I don't feel good.

Explosive, you have a tree growing out of your shoulder. Did you realize that? I'm going to take that.

All right, so sorry,

I follow up his attack and try to. It's the one in the front right there.
All right, you leap forward. Forward.

Seven. No, wait.

Yeah, seven. What's the number on the dice? Three.
Three, that's within its counter range. No.
So you dive forward to strike towards it as you do. The plant woof ducks out of the way.

And as soon as you finish your strike and realize you've only hit air, you look up just as it's

reaching towards you to try and swallow the sword. Not again.

15 to hit.

You get swallowed a second time. And full noon skullet squished and crushed before he managed to vomit you out on the ground.
Poor guy.

Oh, that's going to be

22 points of damage on that one. Okay, how are you?

I'm reduced by your defense. Yeah, you gotta reduce by your defense.

But yeah, it's a nasty counter on that one. Does that finish your ghost? Azari?

Mabel? Sorry, Mabel, you're up. Oh, sick.
Yo, I'm gonna do that unicorn assault again because that shit rules.

Let's go. Let's do it, baby.
I swing him a hammer around. Unicorn rune on the hammer starts glowing up.
On your hand, it starts glowing to match it. You rush forward with the hammer swinging.

Go ahead and roll your attack. Here I go, baby.

Three plus four.

That misses. That was my exact one.

So no, it does not.

No, no, no, sorry, sorry, it does count on a three. It does not hit it, though.
Okay. So as you rush towards with a hammer, swinging it,

your foot just catches one rock that you weren't standing there. You're like,

oh,

your momentum carries you, and as you rush past, the one that's standing in there in front goes, get up. And he's going to just try and eat you the gift that you are there.

That's still a unicorn. It's going to be a 12 to hit.
Thank you.

You're going to be 13. 13.
You just managed to dart past that one. Whoa, whoa, whoa.
The one in the back tries to do it as well. Very agile.
That one's going to be a 12, however. So

the one in the front misses you. The one in the back just kind of opens its mouth and waits for you to roll in and just

takes you in.

With that, you take

15 points of damage. Oh, my God.
Ow! And no defense because you unicorn. That's right, I don't have any defense.
Yes, that's straight damage.

All right, so that finishes your turn at the top of the round. Teddy, you're up.
Geez, I crawl back out, bro.

She kind of lets you like, no, you deserve this. Everybody gets a bad one.

You did well, Barnabas. You're doing really well.
Oh, thank you.

Oh, God. Who are you? Oh, that's Barnabas.

That's me.

You got the poison. I was kidding to you.
You gave me your turn. Yep.

Take my damage. Take 2d6 poison damage, ignoring defense.

Yo, this guy looks really sick. Oh, man.

nine points of poison damage that ain't fine all right all right and take your turn yeah i'm gonna take my turn here we go who are you gonna have the one in the front is the only one you can hit the one in the front is the only one i can hit yeah uh that's uh 11 to hit that hits all right let's uh do some damage come on come on big money

oh yeah uh 8 15 uh 21 29 points of damage 29 points of damage a heady combo

the one in the front and gets knocked in the air and kind of lands with a heavy thud it's looking pretty dang hurt I kind of throw up a little on it and back up.

It looks at you incredulously with no face because it's a plant creature, but you assume it's like, what the fuck? You did this.

All right, finishing your turn, Teddy. Now they're both going to go.
The one in the front is going to attempt to sweep up and swallow you. Uh-oh.

Again, that's going to be a 12, which I think just misses your

evasion.

The one in the back is going to go ahead and shoot poison thorns at you. Oh, I don't want this.
No, don't.

But zombie. With a natural two, two, however, it fails.

Oh, you don't have to.

Don't get around a second time. This other direction.

See, that's how it's done, sick man.

You didn't even hit it.

Pips, you're up, Barnaby. On your name.
I'm taking another shot with my bow to the one in the front. You got it.
This one's already damaged. Yes.
All right. That is gonna be a 15 to 10.

It's good roll damage. Oh, all right, we got four.

We got a nine, thirteen, plus eight.

That's 12.

That was not a good one. 21.
21 points of damage.

That one takes the blow and is reduced to a withered, quivering pile of plant matter. Nice.

This one shifts back to the front. Finishing your turn.
Barnaby, you're up with Zasari on deck. I guess it's just you and me.

All right, that is 15.

15 hits, yeah.

That's going to be 13 damage. 13 damage.
That's better than last time. Yeah.
All right, sip. Alright, so

the boomerang slices through it. It kind of takes the impact, shrugs off, and flies back in your hand.
You see part of it kind of open and spill a little bit.

But it's still pooping pretty hardy. Just taking some hits.
Don't have to make it a spectacle. That is fine.
That is fine.

Much, much worse. Fair enough.
Zusari, you're up with Mabel Undeck.

Can I... I can use an anti-toxin here, right? If you want to use your action to do that, yeah.

Yeah, I mean,

let me do that. Um,

so I

want to like

throw uh an antitoxin to you.

You've had antidote this whole time?

Yes, but I

oh, thank you. We practice that a lot.

Uh,

sorry, it took me so long to get that to you. Do I drink it or do I put it on the thing? I don't remember.
Are you able to move?

Yes,

that's right. And indeed, you are no longer poison.

This guy's had a tree growing out of his arm for like four

hours.

Remember to call someone.

Sometimes it's

clear more of the board before it, you know,

so no one else gets poisoned. Yeah, we're good.

We have to take care of it. That is tactically.
So

awesome. That finishes your go.
Feel the pain. Mabel, you're up.
Oh, okay. There's one left at the front, and you see it's like...

I'm going in for a good old-fashioned swammy at this point. This is the one that hit you last round, too.
Oh, I got a bone to pick.

It wants another taste.

Revenge for both of us. I've also been eaten.
Let's try to smash it right down into the ground. You got it.
All right, go ahead and roll an attack. That's right, I have to do that.
Plus four to that.

18 plus four.

And that is within your crit range.

So, yeah, so roll your damage. Let's go.
Oh, you're done for. Two plus four plus eleven.

That's a number. That's 17.
Okay. Times two.

That's going to be 34. So it takes 34 points of damage.
Ooh!

A heavy impact. Wham! It opens its mouth to try and swallow you whole, and then it sees the hammer is just too big for it to take.
And it was like,

it's smashing the ground. You pull the hammer back, and it's like,

it's barely holding on by a thread. Oh, it's still alive.

It's still alive.

Come on. Top of the round, Teddy.
You're up.

Nope. What did you roll? A one.
A one. It's going to go ahead and get a counter-attack.

Wow, that shit sucks.

I wanted you to get the killing ball. No, I'm so sorry.
Natural 20. No, one.
A one to a natural 20. 21.
Okay, no, never mind. That's all right.

That's

a real bad day. You're having a real rough day here.

All right. It's not a great damage roll.
So that's a good one for you.

So 18 points of damage. That could have been a lot worse.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You got lucky in that one, but it kind of gets you partway into its mouth and tries to chew you in, and you just like kick it off and land, but your legs get kind of shredded in the process and a little numb.

You're feeling numb in a lot of places right now.

It's a lot of flesh and wound. Yeah.
All right, so that finishes your go. Now it's going to go.
It's going to go ahead and try to swallow you.

That's gonna be a 15 to hit. Dang it.

My third tiger to eat. I know.
Once they have a taste, man.

That's gonna be

16 points of damage.

Reduced by eight, so just eight. All right, finishing.
There go. Pips, you're up with Barney on Death.
Let's finish this. Oh, Pips, why wouldn't you do it to him?

Okay, that's a 19, which is in crit range for me. That is, yeah.
So, you know. Roll your damage and double it.
Okay. Ruin it.

All right, so we got

six plus nine,

fifteen.

Plus.

So do I also double the damn?

Okay, so the numbers are bigger in this version, but also that goes both ways.

So what did I say? 15? 15 plus 18. 15.

Plus it. Yes.
Oh.

Explain to me how your arrow finishes off this entity. I'll just, as all of this is happening, I just go, oh, take out the

just let it go really quick. Right through the mouth.
It goes through and it's like,

like nothing happened. You You think you missed and goes

like the plant version of I don't feel so good, Mr. Stark.
It's like, wow.

Splatters of Lamp Mystera everywhere.

A handier fire rune magic seemed to carry through on that one arrow and detonates it from the inside.

That was cool as hell, Lib. Dang, thank you.

How are you doing?

I'm okay. I can hold together.

Here, let me do it. Let me give you some healing.
I can help you. I was gonna say, like, I don't wanna blow through everybody's healing.
Yeah, I'm 35 down, but like. Aren't you a little mad?

It took like four hours to get that medicine in you? No,

no, I'm good. So

I'm a tough guy. I can, I can't.
If someone can roll five D20s for me real fast. That's ominous.

I don't know if I like that.

What are the numbers? Oh, 14. 14, okay.
11.

11 again. Okay.

Four. Okay.
How many is that? That's four. One more.

18. 18.

So amongst all these creatures, oddly, as they're dead and plants, they also produce poch because this is a JRPG.

So

as you rummage through their bodies, you find 500 potch amongst the dead plant creatures.

I should have sold this. As well as a medicine.
A medicine. Nice.

And I retrieve my medicine and I give it to you.

Sensei. Good kid.

Don't pour that in. I actually drink it.

The medicine heals you for 50. Oh, wow, my god, that's great.

100 potch? 100 potch each.

All right. I feel like that's good.
I mean, I feel like this guy should get a little bit more. No, no, no, no, no.
I'll be getting it from you at the end.

As this battle kind of concludes and you all kind of go over yourselves, you like look behind you and you see Alex is there holding his fresh short sword who did not get engaged in the battle and is like back in the doorway, like shaking a little bit.

And it's like,

you know what?

I'm gonna keep watch here at the door in case any of the problems happen.

And

good luck. If you need anything, let me know.
Remember, you keep what you find other than what's at the core of this. Looks like you already made a little scratch out there.
That's great.

He kind of looks out into the ruins, and you can see, like, fear in his eyes. Like, he hasn't been this close.
And now that he's this close, he's like, I don't know if I want this. It's like,

yeah, I'll just hang here.

Good luck. I'm gonna be honest, Alex.
I kind of forgot you were here.

Good. That means I won't affect your performance.

Can I like walk up to him and I put a hand on his shoulder and I go, return home, Alex. Your family awaits your safe return.
Let us handle the ruins. You make sure you're there for them.

We'll do our job and you do yours.

Pats your arm. Oh, okay, okay.

I appreciate that.

I know Hilda was anxious anyway, and I mean, looking

kind of holds his sword up and he was about to sheathe

his wrist and it's just no sense of how to swing and just goes

yeah I would have been no use anyway.

Hilda was right

okay

um

in case we don't make it out you can have my portion of the potch. Okay, you drop me like kind of leaves it there.
He's like, honestly, we made a deal. You're gonna make it out fine.

You keep taking it and I keep walking. I'll take it.
That's fine.

Can we have your little dirk too. That'd be great.

No. No, you got it.
I need it. Just in case something happens.
Keep myself protected. Oh, sure, yeah.
You know how to use it, obviously. Well, it'll be dropped there if something bad happens.

Yeah, yeah, no, that's great.

Yeah. It's like, but if it gets too hairy,

come back. It's not worth losing your lives in there.
I don't know what's in there. So just be ready.

Good luck. And he backs into the mist.

But, nevertheless, you are now within the temple.

I was like, what's he doing?

I was like, what's he doing? We're getting the paper. What? Here we go.

Oh, this is... I didn't know we were going to get this.
I'm very excited.

Yeah,

wow.

We've got a map. So now

with paper ruse.

To mark your troop

best as to where you might be throughout. Oh, this is so darable.

Right, the cheese.

The top down. Yeah, exactly.

Trying to build

a little bit of a marker. Yeah.

I'll just say this little brass thing is your party where you need to travel.

But you see, as you go through here, down this hall, there is an entryway this way, and the hall continues down this way and then vanishes that direction.

Oh, it's a camp. So we have two options.

We either go for the big door or we go around the corner.

Oh, I didn't even see there's a door. That's cool as hell.
There is a door, although the door, I mean, is the obvious... There's the obvious point.
It might be...

It's exactly what they expect us to do. Yeah, I think we should explore a little bit before we try to open the door, because the door seems like it would trigger some kind of stuff to happen.

You know what I mean? It does. It's actually, that's very fair.
Well, that was good thinking. Can I walk up to the door and sort of look at it, investigate it? Sure.

Like, if there's any, like, locks or...

Sure, go ahead and roll a D20 for me. Add your luck skill.

A nine.

Total of nine? total nine

looking throughout it it does appear like there is some sort of a locking mechanism to it there isn't a keyhole uh there is a small gap in there where it looks like a shape would fit

um

that's the best you can make out okay i don't think we'd be able to get through this door anyway it seems like there's like a mechanism here maybe like some sort of thing we would need to get the door unlocked anyway i don't know i'm pretty strong do you

do you want to try to break it open sure if you want me to to.

That's just how you set off a trap. Let's be honest.
It's best to get the door open. Oh, okay.

The one thing I'm good at.

And you did really well in that last fight. And you know, maybe it's time to get good at two things.

And what's the second thing? I don't know. That's up to you.
Caution. Maybe caution us.
I don't think caution is going to happen. Well, you know what? Let's cautiously look around the corner then.

All right. All right.
Just a little picture. So you're not hitting the door? Hell no.
Okay. These fools don't want me to.
You could anyway. You Unless.

Go over the door. Do you?

Yeah, all right. Go ahead and roll.
Roll and add your strength. Okay.

Oh, the stood. That's D20.
No, you got right. D20.
Okay. I rolled a 20.
I saw that. I was a 20 when you rolled it.
So yeah, that'll do it.

So

as everyone's like, hmm, this is a good lesson. And everyone starts walking further down the hallway.
You just give it a second and you go.

Whoa!

You hear this massive impact, the sound of cracking and breaking stone and bending metal

And as the dust kind of settles around there you see standing there Mabel with her massive hammer and as it begins to clear you can see the doorway is just a mangled mess that opens into the interior here

that's

Mabel you are quite strong. Yeah, I told you Every time I'm like, I gotta hit the door, you're all like, no, we gotta do a little puzzle or something, but no, no, it worked.

I just feel like the wrong lesson was learned here.

Yes, now I know. Take notes.
Hit door. whenever you approach one.
See? Now you're learning.

Looking into this chamber, as you blast open the door and you guys kind of glance in, there is another massive double door across the way and hallways to go to the right and left.

You want me to hit that one too?

No, but you're gonna do it anyway. Well, you know, I feel like I'm a little tired.
I could use a little rest. My triceps are tight.
You know what I mean?

We'll take a rest and look around the corner. Okay.

Can I look at that?

Yeah, you want to move forward and check? Yeah. Yeah.
Go ahead and roll

D20 for me.

Uh, three, just a three.

I mean, it just looks like a design for the rest of the temple. There are different types of stone and everything around you.
Maybe I'll step on it. Let me give it a look.
Whoa, yeah.

What are you trying to do? I want to see.

Yeah, I kind of want to see what that is because I don't think we should step on it. Yeah, I don't want to step on it.
What's on the ground there? Yeah, right there. That's good.
Roll a d20 for me.

Five. Five.
It's just a chalk. This looks design.
Yeah, we both just just like nod and

cool squares. Yeah, it's actually really cool.
Some kid was playing in here or something. Who cares?

I don't think that is what it is. No?

Let's just try something. I'm going to take a potch and just toss it at the snow.

Ting, ting, ting, ting, ting.

Nothing.

Some damn kid just threw that on the floor. I just want to say it.

She wants to step on the floor. It was a seal.
Doesn't matter. How How about

I'll throw my hammer on it and we all kind of just

back up. You know what I'm saying?

If it's a pressure plate and we're not on it,

right? What if you lose the hammer?

Well, you know,

I've known to fisticuff in my time.

I believe in your strength, Mabel. You broke this door all, but if you're willing to risk the hammer, by all means.
Let's give it a shot, huh?

Why not? Let's go for it. All right, I toss my hammer onto the thing.

It hits the stone work with like a heavy impact.

Half-second passes.

No issue.

Flames engulf sprang out of each corner of this area.

This inferno burns in the core of this area as you all kind of step back, your eyebrows singed in a flash as you kind of cover and protect yourselves before the flames disappear.

And your hammer has a nice, like, blackened soot coat over it. But it is a metal hammer, so it took it fine.
Oh, there's some mean kids who drew that on the floor

how'd they get in there they must be really light kids i don't like those kids all right i gotta get my hammer back hold on

i reached to grab my hammer okay you grab your hammer and you can see now like the the the floor part is indented like where it landed and as you're gonna step onto it and lift the hammer your weight still holds it down

I didn't

mean meaning it's still depressed.

Okay, maybe this was the wrong way to go about this. I don't know.
It seemed to work pretty well. Maybe you keep your hammer there.
Well, right. You've been known to fisticuff in your time.
I see.

Different idea. How about you stay there? Yeah, why don't you walk across until it's up and then we will grab you out as fast as we can.

Yeah, I'll take a look at these double doors and see if they're hittable for a while, you know? Just kind of do my research.

What's a not hittable door out of curiosity? I'm just saying. The other one, I just went willy-nilly, and we just, it's like, okay, it goes, but this one seems a little stronger.

This is is smart for you. I'm impressed.

Is it possible to see where

the flames are coming from?

Yeah, you go ahead and glance kind of the direction where they came from, and there are small stone tubes about that large that are closed off that

seem to blend in with a lot of the majority of the stone work that builds the wall. But now you glance up, you can see kind of the bit of the blackened exterior where the flames were jet from.

Does it seem like there are other pipes around or was or at the moment, I mean, tough from where we are.

I will roll a D20.

And an additional question while he's doing that:

is it like a hole where

it splits and spits out the fire, or is it just there and the fire comes out? It looks like where darkness, there is a cap on it at the moment. Okay, and closed to hold it off.

Okay.

All right, do we see any more of these little... I'm going to examine this door real quick, just to see if it's

looks weak enough for me to hit with my hammer.

This is a heavier door than the one you... Because the last one you saw was like kind of metal bars.

This one is like a heavy stone door. I mean, you don't know until you try, but it is definitely a hefty doorway.
Okay, for real.

And we can see down that hallway now, right? Or we can see that. If you move in this way, yeah, let's see.
Let's take a look. What's up?

That's so cool.

It continues and then turns to the left.

Alright. Yeah, it's going left.
You go down, there's a left turn, just so you know. I can see it because I'm on the thing.

Wisdom of youth. Okay.

I'm going to get to the corner and I'm going to peek around. Obviously, I'm paying attention to see if there's other things to step on.
Or things on the wall that look a little iffy.

Okay, so you peek around, you move into the hallway. Just yeah, I'm just going to carefully look around.
But however, we should probably have Mabel stay on this pressure. Yeah, I'm not going anywhere.

Hey, don't you have a mirror that says you're great? Oh, yes, there's a mirror to look around the corner. You know what I'm saying?

Oh, yes, I. Thank you.
Okay,

If there's a creature over there, is it going to tell the creature that it looks great, or is it going to be like you should? Oh, that's how we'll know.

It'll say you look great.

There's something over there. All right, hand it over.
Hand it over. It's going to be a good idea.
Oh, it's a freaking genius over here. All right.

Does the mirror have an opinion?

The mirror says nothing. All right.
All right.

Thank you. All right.
I'm going to look around, turn around and see it around the corner. Okay.

Hold on. Maybe there is somebody, but they don't look great.
It would have said something. That's never happened.

It's for reassurance. It tells me that you couldn't imagine what it would be looking at.
It is a non-judgmental meal. Well, maybe we should test it on Teddy because I don't know.

You know, that's true. I look great.
You look great. See?

So it says it for anybody. Got it.
Okay, well, it's for reassurance.

So you step into the

corner. Step in the corner.
Okay.

As you move beyond that corner there, it is mostly empty other than a small chest that appears to be closed.

Alright, anything weird about this chest? What do you see over there? Nothing. Everything's fine.
Okay.

I believe.

Everything look okay? It looks like a chest. Alright.
There's a chest. I'm going to open it.

If I don't come out,

be careful, Sensei. Be careful.
Alright, I'm going to do it. Don't

and back up.

Okay, you...

Kick the open.

The rest of you hear like some something wooden crate or something impacting. As you step back,

nothing happens. Alright, and now look inside.
You look inside.

There are two things in there. There is a small piece of medicine.

Actually, this will be just that one there.

There was one stuck to it, but then it vanished. And what did you find?

And...

A small parchment scroll that is wrapped up tightly and bound with a piece of colored leather. That, as you can glance at it, it looks to be a

transferred runic spell.

Wow. With protective kind of earth-based earth rune magic.
Alright.

Well, I found some magic and I found some medicine.

That's pretty cool. Yeah, that's pretty cool.
No, wait, it's not cool. You said you found some magic? Well,

it's magic written down, so it's not yet magic. It's just

don't read that shit. Alright, I'm going to peek around the other corner.

On this corner? Yeah. Just like slowly, just like a.
Just reading it more. There's another chest on that corner.

There's another chest over here.

You wanna go for it? Yeah, all right. I'll

kick it open too. Okay.
And then step back really quick. You kick it open?

This one has like a loud squeak, as like whatever rusted hinges inside haven't been open in a long time. As this is an ancient ruin.
I heard that one.

Ancient constructed building. My apologies.

But shh, it opens up.

Kind of glance inside. There is a small kind of glass orb that seems to have like a fire kind of burning on the inside.

Oh, you can see it.

A fire lizard orb.

There's nothing in here. Well, what are you guys doing on over there?

Nothing! We know exactly what you sound like when you lie. You pick it up, and the fire inside seems to like

brighten in intensity on the inside of this orb. And as you do, you also feel this like heat emanating onto your face from it and from above, almost like the sun had opened up.

Though it's still kind of gray and cloudy in the sky. And you hear like

you glance up, and the light that's coming from above is coming from the

two

three fiery birds.

Flying fire drake-like birds that are

swooping towards you as you turn to run and join the rest of your troop. The rest of you see, as in the middle of this battlefield right now, as you're still looking in the middle,

these three fire drakes are now swarming after Pit. Let's go ahead and get the battlefield.
the next one.

Yeah, kill those trees.

They knew what they did. They knew what they did.

Timber.

Alrighty. Cool.

Okay.

Is this something I can imbue into... How do I imbue this into a weapon? You need a moment of downtime to do it.

Got it. Can I move? Can I still move about the plane? If you want to, yeah.
Okay, because I'm on the platform right now. You're on the platform.
You're all kind of backed up onto the platform.

Yeah, I think we're all. all great.

Yeah, she rushed back to you, and you guys are on the platform right now. Okay.

For whatever that may mean.

Alrighty, so let's go ahead and roll everyone's speed.

20.

7.

Everyone's speed? Wait. Oh, you're.
Yeah, roll, roll and add your speed. All right, so you got 20 since I.

All right, 20 to 15. 15.
15 for 10. So, yeah, you joined in a lot of time.
Right. 15 to 10?

I got seven. Seven? I got seven as well.
Oh, rollies. Both roll d20s and see who rolls the higher.

One. Fifty.

Okay, there we go. One.

Table.

Then I assume.

Table.

Barnaby. Alrighty.
The flaming salamanders go first.

So the first one is going to go ahead and do an inferno in the middle here. It rises up.

Releases a a torrent of fire that goes towards everybody in the front row.

Burning path across all of you for 3d8 magic damage.

Doesn't even roll to attack on this one. That's going to be 12 points of fire damage on everyone in the front row there.
So 12. You add your magic.

Magic defense, baby. I don't take anything.

How much? 15. 15.
Yes, you take no damage.

You just take it out of the fire. I don't fuck with magic, okay?

But the rest of you reduce it by your magic defense.

Another thing that you're just standing.

Whatever, bro.

I know what on earth.

Do you want to open with something rough? Let's do it. This one here.
There's two other ones left to go.

This one here is going to go ahead and leap up and it's going to go ahead and do a flame burst onto.

Since you didn't take any of it, this one's going to get frustrated and try and come at you. This one does have to roll to attack.
Yeah, come at me. That's going to be a 16 to hit? Oh, yeah.
13.

All right. so that does

21 points of fire damage. Is that magic? It is magic damage, yeah.
Okay, still ape so much. So you still take six? Yeah, you only take six damage from that.

Yeah, as it breathes, it flies right to your face, and it's like,

like, yeah, guard ring! Away from the guard!

It's like,

and it stops, like,

I'm like, all pissed off, lies back to its spot. I don't think magic likes you.
This is insane.

The one back there is going to go ahead and try and dive bomb you. So it like pulls back

and shoots at you with an incredible flying speed, trying to like just slam right into you. That's going to be

a natural two. What's your counter? Four.
Four? Yeah, it misses and you get to roll an attack on it. Cool.

As it dive bombs towards you, you just kind of duck out of the way and both confos. What do I? What do I? Just roll d20 and add your accuracy, which is plus four.

Uh

11. 11 unfortunately misses.
Yeah,

fairly evasive creatures, so you both

whiff past each other once, but still take no damage on that one. Finishing the salamander's turn, now it is Zusari and Teddy's go.
Okay, want to do this? Yeah, let's do it. Let's do this.
All right.

Oh, here we go. Soldier Storm.
Soldier Storm.

Let's go. Unite attack up here.

Oh, my fucking God.

Crazy.

I add my accuracy to you. Add your accuracy.
Yeah.

18

18 and what'd you get? One natural for a five. Okay, yeah.
So yours definitely misses yours hits.

So uh you only do so you'll just do your damage plus two d6 plus two d6. Okay

what do you call this move? Soldier's storm soldier's storm that's pretty cool

yeah yeah reminds me of my days in the war and I'll teach you how to do it once you you know

and then count the

sixes and then add two d6

so Roll that twice. This one takes one.

Oh, wow.

Okay.

Damn.

23. 23 points of damage to all the creatures in that row.
All three of them. Yeah.
All three. Hell yeah.
Yeah.

So describe to me how you miserably fail in the middle of this, but you still carry it through.

I run through in an attempt to attack, but and they all dive at me. I don't manage to hit any of them, but like, and now you can just

Mario hop as they're as they're as they're trying to attack you I like hop off your shoulders and like like hit each one like Like I do like a little split kick and like hit one in the middle of my hand

And they're like I got you master. Don't worry

As you get up with a skin knee. All right

Hair's a little cinched. All right.

That was a good tactic pretending like you weren't gonna hit them and just fucking them for me to do it the whole time All right, so both of your defenses zero until your next turn. So mark that.

All right, finishing your go. Pips, you're up with Mabel on deck.
Here we go. All right, so, um, oh, you know what I'm gonna do? Pip, we can do our team up.
It goes the whole row. Shit.

I think I am gonna do a whole row.

Okay, you know what I'm gonna do? Elven ambush. Well, I was gonna do, I was gonna do firewall.
Oh, well, that. Oh, but they are fire.
They are fire creatures. So it may not.

That's right.

Okay, we're doing a we're doing an elven ambush.

I'm just giving you a heads up on that.

Oh, yeah.

Fire rune, useful in most circumstances. Outside of this one.

Okay, I rolled a.

For Elven Ambush. Yep.
I rolled. Wait, what do I add to? Add your accuracy.
Accuracy. Ebo accuracy.
Okay, so

18. 18 hits them.
Oh, oh, five.

Five. Oh.

All right, so. Ooh, one, yeah.

Otherwise.

Okay, so you still hit all of them. Oh, hell yeah.
But it only, but you'll be, you could, you roll damage, combine it, and then half it. So you do half damage.
Okay, okay, okay.

All right. Big money, big money.

Okay, 18 for me. 22.
22. Awesome.
18, that's 40. Half 20 damage to everything in that row.

Still pretty dang good.

Everybody's been hit a bit.

So how do you two finish your elven ambush against all three of these salamanders in the front row? Uh

okay.

Yeah, it's like a weird. You have a bow and I have a hammer.
That's all right. Yeah.
Um um okay. I have an idea like maybe I kind of like tuck to the side a little bit.

What if you're like what if you used my hammer as an arrow?

Ooh! That's sick, right? That's kind of awesome.

I love it.

So the two of you get up there, you pull the hammer back into the bow and you kind of you're like putting your whole body into the front of the bow as you're holding it back.

You can also help by pulling it back in the arrow, yeah. And so it just turns it into one massive titanic arrow.
And

Now it's a little heavy and a little uptuse, which is why it doesn't have the impact it would normally, but it does

kind of like blast its way through all three of the salamanders. They try to knock out of the way.
Still get a hit and knock down. A heavy hit.
All three of them are starting to look a little hurt.

Your hammer spins off,

hits the wall. You kind of have to rush over and grab it without taking your back foot off of the plate.

Back in your place. Let's go ahead and roll to see which one of you is unbalanced.
That's going to be you, Mabel. So next turn, you cannot attack or use runes.
Oh, that's all right.

I don't care about runes. Who gives a shit about them? There you go.
All right, finishing both your guys go.

Barnaby, you're up. Oh,

I understand these have probably seen this before as I swing my boomerang in my hand back and forth. This is an anti-aerial boomerang against anti-aerial folks, and then my mirror will fall down.

You look great. All right, doesn't matter.

Swing, I guess, throw. They're all same damaged, right?

They all have taken the same damage.

I don't like the middle one. It flipped me off, I guess.
That is. Oh, God, eight.
So. Eight, unfortunately, misses.

That's the way your boomerang kind of like, you're like, oh, it's gone now. It's like throwing your airplane you spent weeks building and it just goes over the neighbor's yard.

You'll never see it again.

Right as you begin to mourn it, it's something like that. I literally don't have anything else.

It like cuts off a little bit of the beard. It almost goes through your juggular.
Each time it comes back to you, it feels almost like it's maybe trying to take you out to be free.

I don't know what that's about.

That's right. I'm just intimidating them.

Fair enough.

Sadly, lower your head in the mirror season.

Back at the top round, this one over here is going to use its once-aday Inferno. It's going to go to rise up and

blank at the front row there with fire damage against all three of you. Magic, bro.
It is magic. Okay.
It's a terrible damage roll.

Oh, it's 3d8. I rolled a 1-1 and a 3.

That's five damage to all of you. You take none.
Of course.

You both take it.

What a ways.

And the last one's going to use its once a day.

Then they've used it all. And it's going to go ahead and do another Inferno Bass

across all three of you in the front. That's...
Oh, that bounces it out.

22 points of magic damage to everyone in the front row. You only take seven.

That's right. All right.

That's right. But you all are just going...

Swathes of flame are just burning around and tearing through the front ranks.

Mabel's kind of... It's summer.
He's used to this. I'm sick of this.
I hate this magic crap. That finishes the Zelemanders go.
Zusari and Teddy, you're up.

Yeah. I'm going to retreat to the back line.
All right. All right, so you're shifting.
Yeah. Or are you hurt? I'm very hurt.
Oh, yikes. Oh, yeah.

Yeah, it takes a turn for me to give somebody a potion, right? To use one on them, you use a turn. Oh, yeah, that's using it on my turn.
Okay.

So that's Zusari. He uses the shift.
That's your turn. You're up.
All right. Yeah, I'm going to attack.

I'm going to start on the right and make my way down. Alright, got it.

That's 17, which means it's my crit range with 21. Go ahead and roll damage and double it.
Let's go. Oh, here we go.
Pitch you up next.

There we are.

Come on, guys. Hey, yeah, that's not bad.

14.

That's 22, doubled 44 points of damage to this one? Yeah.

I just go in and I pound it in the ground and I actually try and put out the flames just like counting it.

Like your hands sizzle, but the impact of your force of a trained warrior, much like the great Haddo.

You are crushing it into the ground, and the flame is extinguishing, and you pull up the callused palms themselves, a little blackened in singe, but not enough to hurt you, while the creature now lies flameless and dead on the ground.

Who's next to be quenched?

Nice! I went right back down too. I've been working on it.
That's pretty good. That's pretty good.
Pips, you're up. Pardon me, you're unduly.
All right, since I'm sorry, Mabel's undone. Got hurt.

As he comes back, I am going to heal him for 40 hit points. Yay! Okay, use another.
I'm going to use another, which is my second. I have four.
It's my second one. Okay, should be 50, actually.

I mean, that's an old. Oh, got it.
Okay.

50, you heal 50. So you heal 50 there? Oh my god, thank you.
You're so welcome. All right, that finishes your go there.
That's your item using your turn. Mabel, you're up with Barnaby on deck.

I can't do anything. That's right.
You can still use an item if you got one. Oh, I don't have an item, though.
I don't. Then you can defend if you want to, which doubles your defense.
I will defend.

Alright, so use the defend action. So until your next turn, your defense is now 14.
So if you take any physical damage.

Oh, so nothing with my magic defense.

Nothing with your magic defense. It defends your physical attack.
Okay, got it. All right, cool.
So that finishes your go.

Barnaby, you're up. Come on, Barnaby.
Oh, what shall I do?

And then, yeah, I'll do it.

Oh, yes, I will. And I throw my boomerang in between my legs and try to catch it.

It'll be 18 to hit. 18 minutes.
Wonderful. Oh, me, oh, my.
19 damage. Yeah.
19 damage to the one in the middle? Yeah.

You carve through it.

You watch the flame like

a small burst of fire and this like blackened form of the salamander underneath just drops on the ground.

Smoke kind of billows out from it. Hits in your boomerang.

You catch it back. That shall satiate my boomerang for a little bit.
Not asking. Not asking.
Awesome. Finishing your turn.

The salamander is now going to try and dive bomb you as you're kind of down in like the lower position. It's going to

try and rock it back towards you.

That's going to be a 19 to hit. Oh, stab.
So with a dive bomb attack, that's going to be

13 points of damage against you.

For defense or what? For two defense. Oh, you defend it.
So it's 14. You take no damage.

So as it darts towards you, you put up a full defensive position and just knock it, deflect it off.

I didn't even need to do any of that good.

Sorry, you're up with Teddy on deck.

Okay, cool. Yeah, I've tried to attack for this one.
The last one. Yeah, I can actually attack him.

17? 17 hits. Go to more damage.
Yeah.

17. 17 damage? 17 damage.
Yeah.

Yes. Snuffs it with your final blows as you pummel it down with the tonphas and they all fall and collapse to the ground.
Your foes now lying

ruined.

Good job with the sticks over there. That was pretty sick.
Well, good job with the hammer. I mean, those things are like no match against you.
Oh, thank you. Well, you're very

formidable. You're very affordable.
Very affordable.

Yes. And affordable.

I don't know about that. I'm pretty expensive myself.
Hey, I have a question. I found this fire lizard orb,

and I already have a lot of fire stuff.

Does somebody want this? What does it do? So, when embedded into a weapon, it imbues your weapon with the fire lizard rune.

And the fire lizard rune, when you deal damage with this weapon, it deals plus two d8 damage oh wow but then you take 1d8 damage i don't magic you i was gonna say who can who can take 1d8 damage i mean i will never turn down a drink it yeah i feel like this will be cool on your boomerang deserve it it'll be cool on your boomerang power inside of my boomerang bros don't sell it though it speaks to me

thank you

welcome i appreciate that so now you have your fire boomerang yes yeah i gotta ask is it like a two is it like a two boomerang like the the triple, or dude, it said like the nerf triple blade boomerang.

I've been thrown another arm when I attached the rune. Okay, God, so cool.
Yeah, it's just like, do you remember the nerf one? There's three? It's just a...

I'm the unified nerf armies of the southwest.

I know you told us not to ask, but like, does your boomerang eat or something? Does it eat?

It doesn't eat, it devours. It devours.
In battle. Yes, thank you.
Does it tell you that you look great? Oh, it speaks to me. That's the mirror.
It speaks to me. It's got a mouth or something? No.

Oh, no. You just hear it? Oh, yes.
How do you know it's speaking to you? Oh, because whenever it comes back, it says things to me. Wow, what kind of things? You're next.
Oh,

that's very, very pleasant. To you, you mean?

Oh, yes. Okay.
Yeah, yeah. Well, I'm assuming I'm its next owner.
Yes. Which I am.
As it's saying, it says.

And then I catch it right before it goes right into my neck. I don't know.
Yes. Oh.
Yes. And I'm glad I give it more about.
Your reflexes are very good. Yeah, really good.

I kind of question some of your relationship decisions right now, but other than that, I think we're pretty good. It has done me wrong in battle before.
I don't think it will be a good time.

People are such a good talking about you. Oh, thank you so much.
I would love, yeah. Let me make a galley with the town.
One time, I was in the town.

I'm going to start walking over the door as this starts. These fiery salamanders upon destruction also drop 250 potch each.
Oh, nice!

So at 750, you can distribute as you feel see fit.

As well as someone roll 3d20s for me.

I'll do each, right? So it'd be 750? I'll do 3d20s. Well, I'm sorry, each of the salamanders.
So 750 total, yeah. They're about about it.
10, 3, and 3.

All right, then that's all you find is the potch.

Ah, boo.

150. Oh, yeah, I was just making sure I knew it.
Well, I just used a calculator.

Oh, so now we all have 250 podch. We have 250.
All of us have 250 each at this point. Well, I don't.
You also.

You have the extra hundred.

Oh, I do. I have 250.
Thank you. That's right.

Why are you making a boomerang that eats you more powerful? Oh, it doesn't eat me.

Clearly. Yeah.

Yeah, same here.

I'm not sure what to do. I think it's just a toxic relationship at this point.
Thank you. Thank you.
It doesn't have toxic powers yet. Manama Key.

All right, how are we going to get me off this platform right now? Hear a strange, like, rumble from the other side of this massive doorway. I wonder what that is.

And also, like, feel a bit of like a impact in the stone, and another, like,

and this sound that you've not heard before. Kind of like a

that I don't like the sound of that. I'm gonna be

honest.

I'm going to say, since I can't move right now,

if this thing barrels down the door at me, I'm screwed. I'm going to walk towards the door.
Okay.

What kind of lock do we have on this thing? It looks like some sort of a heavy metal bar

mechanism that kind of holds it shut from the walls themselves. Like two bars emerge from the side of the stone walls that are kind of holding it shut underneath, like bars that are set into it.

All right, I'm going to kind of go to the side to see if there's a mechanism or something to delete it. Yeah, man.

Can I look under the door?

18.

I mean, the mechanism that holds it shut, there's nothing else in this doorway that connotates to you that the way to open it is present.

Can I peek under the door?

Yeah, you get low and peek underneath, and you can see shadows moving, and you hear the sound. It's like a

shadows move, and it's like something gets them, and the door impacts from that side, and you hear.

All all right we really got to find a way to get me off this platform right i think it needs the mirror and i try to stuff it under the door

the mirror says

oh no okay all right well that's telling me something all right let's uh maybe

maybe we just open the door and get out of the way i don't have a fire

that's actually a great idea i don't think the door opens right now Oh, you don't know the mechanism. There's no mechanism present to open.
Oh, it's not. We can't lift the bars.
I understand. Yeah.

Okay.

Let's try. We haven't been around the side.
Let's see if there's something around the side. If we all hop off the platform really quick, maybe we can get out of the way of that.

I'm just going to grab you and pull you off the platform at full speed. Okay.

As you all leave the platform.

Behind you as you all trek by this hall here.

Man, you're strong, eh? You give me in, my hand. You're very small.
Okay. Coming down this long hall, there is another set of bar door there.
I guess so. That is

similar to the one that you had destroyed earlier. Oh, interesting.
Looks like we have the key. Hmm.
Looks like I've got to smash another door.

Here we go, baby. Smash the door, baby.

Backing up. Go ahead and roll d20 and add your strength.
Come on.

16.

Look at my strength. Plus three.

19. Nice.

The first hit causes the whole door to

inward and your hammer gets kind of wedged. You have to put your foot up and pull it free and one more heavy hit causes it to burst open and revealing the interior.

You're so cool. Thank you.
I know, man. This is so cool.

These things are not being learned.

I'm going to be honest. I didn't expect that to happen.

This is sick. So that tumbles off there.
You find on the inside here, there's chunks of rubble.

There are two chests, and it looks to be like a purple stone that is like pulsing and glowing in the middle that has a similar shape to what you saw in one of the doors earlier.

But this one is embedded in the ground. Oh, it's one of those math things.
Go ahead and do that. This math thing? Yeah, you were putting together math or something.
It wasn't me.

There was... That was almost.
I don't want to take the spotlight, but don't mind if I do. And I'll try to mess with it.
Okay.

You walk up to it and kind of approach the symbol and see the pulsing stone.

You realize as you approach, it's not the shape of the first door you entered.

It was the shape that you would have seen in the door that you originally broken, like a slot where it can be almost placed in to situate it.

But it is... like built into the ground

this is different i'm sorry what are we talking about

why don't you why don't you read again or something wait oh I have this scroll and I'll take out a scroll

it's magical oh no get that away from me okay all right

while you read that

can I try to like I want to remove it but can I like like try to spin it so I see if it's removable slides as soon as you turn it and as it goes

you hear in the distance

the sounds of shifting stone somewhere down that way. I think the dude is on them.

Let's check these treasure chests really quickly. I'm feeling good about them.

I'm going to lift up the one on the left. And I'll lift up the other.
Okay.

You open both of them.

I need you both to roll a d20 and add your dexterity both.

Yeah.

19.

20. 1920.

You both barely jump out of the way as suddenly both of them blast a massive cloud of like purple black, some sort of weird icker fume that fills the space, and you all kind of back away and cover your mouths.

Oh, there you go, like hits the walls and leaves like a strange

mildew-almost residue on it before it kind of dissipates. This the air still smells bad, but it's enough to the point where if you have cloth covering your face, you can kind of push through.

And the interior of the chests are laid bare. You have

in one of them

two antidotes. Oh, nice, nice.
I'm at the end of the hallway already.

Oh, thank you. And uh...

One for you.

And the other one is a set of leather armor. What happened in there? Let's see.
What happened in there, guys? Is there stuff in there? No, nothing. Okay.

Leather armor just kind of just adds that, does it? Alright.

Take it. I was going to say, anybody need a little armor? Are we all feeling good? I mean, I'm pretty...
I could use it. I don't have...

Oh, I do have technically body armor. I'll actually say, like...
Here's replace what you have on there. Yeah, I'll actually say, since I'm kind of a, I'm frontlining, so.
Yeah.

Are you familiar with spoils up there? Yeah.

You know, I got low defense, actually, so if you find any armor, just let me know.

No problem. I'll let you know.

You all hear the flames in the other chamber, the familiar

sound of that trap triggering, immediately followed by,

oh no, went to the wrong ones.

And as you all begin to collect around the side, you see running past the hall, smoking, what looks to be like a bipedal,

smallish-sized kobold, a dog person that has like scrappy armor,

you know, kind of what looks like a, some sort of a Labrador type snout,

what looks to be some sort of like hooked scimitar-like sword in one hand, and it's like patting the flames out of its legs as it looks back to you.

You're help! You're helping!

Pulls his blade back, and you watch as a strange shape begins to slowly drift around the corner. It is a massive crescent moon with a human face just

enters the room.

Its eyes slowly turn to the rest of you.

And we're going to go to break.

GRPG's got them weird enemies. 11.
We'll be back here in a few minutes. We'll see you guys here shortly.

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Every purchase helps support our shows and the stories we tell. Speaking of which, let's get back to the story.

And welcome back. So as we left off, you all as a troop were inspecting the side of the room.

You had unlocked the distant door in the chambers, which set off the flaming trap as as some sort of a dog kobold

humanoid creature stumbled out, patting its flames down, looked towards you for help, said, Help, Grebic, help Grebick, and began to like bark in the direction as a strange, terrifying, massive crescent moon with a face kind of just floated into the hall and stared at all of you with its open, vacant eyes.

Is that a moon? And that's where we're gonna go ahead and jump into this battle. An automaton of some sort.

Here we go. And as part of this,

well, you have a new ally in your troop.

Hey, hey,

Gremek pulls out his axe and his shield.

His name's Gremick. Grimmick.
Is it Gremic? Help him Gremnick. Help him Gremick.
I thought that was a different language. So,

one of you, or you can take turns controlling Gremek as the sixth member of your party. Oh, that's so sick.
Yo, Gremek's my best buddy right now.

We got a little money on him.

He got 150 pops.

Oh, but wait, hold on. Oh, what a donation to him.

Oh, wait, whoa!

What is that?

Oh, my gosh.

Oh.

Look at his lips. You got lips.

You have entered the realm of Mr. Venus.

Closer, please. All right, so

20 to 15, anybody?

22. 22 is a second.
18. Oh, boy.

Alright, and Teddy. So Teddy's up? No.

Sorry than Teddy. Sorry than Teddy.
15 to 10? Six.

Teddy.

Okay.

Ricketts.

10 to 5. Six.
Five.

Yes.

I'm not a good roller.

Oh, yeah. Not a good one.
So Mabel's next. It's Mabel Barnaby.
Mabel than Barnaby.

Pippy, what'd you get? I rolled A2. Alright.

Pips. I'm Drew.
All right. Pips.
And then who wants to roll for Grimmick?

Okay, I'll roll for Grimmick.

That's a four.

Plus two? Strange. Strange four.
So Grimmick. That's a foal.
It's going to rip it for you, Pips. I think that's a four.
Grimm.

I feel like you have a bit about this, about some of the things you can do. Grimmick dice.
Oh, yeah, I excuse it.

Let me see.

It's not unorganic dice. It's like, yeah.

I was like, what is happening? No, no, no. It's about spin-top dice.

Which is the one that I use a lot that doesn't read. That's a four, right? Oh, this is so hard to read.
See?

I still own an eye store. This is who she is.

This is who the fuck she is. I stole a Sam's dice.

Teddy's a four. For sure.
I still own a Sam's because I took off the dice.

Okay, okay, okay. So that's a two.
I got smaller dice than that. All right.
Oh, my God. I do.
I have teeth. So,

so sorry, you're up first

with Teddy on deck. Wait, so Grammek is when? Grammek is right before you.

Got it. I'm going to try to attack this thing.
Poke it in the eye.

Let's go. It's got that eye.
Maybe I can blind it. Throw him off.

What do you think?

23 definitely hits.

Yeah.

Oh, wait. I rolled a 19.

That's a great.

Yeah! Let's go.

30.

No, no, it can't. It's a little bit of a damage.
That's a mini 2.

30 points of damage. All right.
Yeah. I don't know what horror is this.
So as you rush forward, Tom puts out whack crack.

The moon just kind of

the eyes

shift onto you and get a little wider. Its big bushy brows kind of one curls upward.
You've drawn its attention. Okay.
Oh, that's not good.

It only has one eyebrow too. Yeah, so this is real bad.
Alright, that finished your turn. Teddy, you're up.
I didn't. I unsuccessfully poked its eye tried to poke its eye out.
It didn't work.

It seems to like you. all right i'm gonna go for the eye i'm gonna go with a straight full running punch come on oh that's a 15 16 7 18 19 19 hits and it's in my crit yeah oh go crit again let's go

my d8s though there we are come on oh that's not bad uh eight uh size 17 17 18 19 20 1 22 32 25 times 2 50 points of damage

real good all right so

two heavy impacts to it. You see its defense kind of chunks off some of it, but it still takes heavy hits from both of it.
Its eyes get wider and begin to glow. As finishing that brings it to Mr.

Venus' turn. Mr.
Venus, dude.

Mr. Venus's eyes begin to flow as he begins to

shake and shimmer. His whole body begins to emit this strange, terrifying light.
You feel this like piercing pain in the middle of your brain as this low hum gets louder and louder.

I don't like it, I don't like it. You watch as the light begins to spit around it and suddenly dozens of crescent energy moons

flying off

cut through all of you. Oh,

so.

Oh boy. Does a 14 miss anybody?

No. No.

No. No.

All of you take. Oh, I hear a lot of damage.
Oh boy. Oh boy, oh boy.
I think I healed it all.

What do you have? 47. Oh, wonderful.
20 points of magic damage to everybody. Wow.

So as these crescents

minus six? Correct. Okay.
You reduce your magic defense from the damage. And you said how many points are you? 20 magic defense.
27.

Oh, I'm all over the magic defense.

This is my worst nightmare that's happening right now. Especially that it hurt my boy Gremek over there.
You okay, Gremek?

Okay.

Alright, I'm good. You're good.

Oh, okay. Mark that for Gremex as well.
Alright, finishing Mr. Venus's turn.
That's you, Mabel. Oh.

This moon is about to get smacked in the nose. I jump up and I straddle its new moon chin, and then I go to whack it right in the nose.
Hell yeah. Go ahead and roll an attack.

10.

Plus your accuracy of four. 14.
That hits. Go ahead and roll damage.
14.

All right, right man. Look at that nose.

Oh, man.

17.

17 damage. Yeah.
Alrighty.

Heavy crack.

It impacts, but this is a fairly fortified moon face.

And the hammer kind of bong hits it and kind of resonates. But it still takes a hit, but it almost seems to chuck off half the damage.
Oh.

It's got a fairly high defense for some of the things you fought already. No, boy.

That finishes your turn. That brings us to Barnaby.
All right,

I'm going to do like a cool flip off the

chin and back into place. What a move, what a move.
What'd you think, Gremic? Do you think that was cool? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Hell yeah. Can't wait to see what you do.

All right, well, we'll see if this does anything, and I'll just like chuck this boomerang at it again.

Flaming boomerang. Yes, my new flaming boomerang with a new, I don't know what the boomerang tails are called.
It has a tail, that's another one. Wonderful.
Oh, not one. Oh, no!

Oh, no, no!

Now that is it. Its counter range is just a one.
One of them. Oh, it's just a one.

So as your boomerang

flies towards it, its eyes shoot up to it, and the boomerang just stops

in the middle of the air.

And it moves its eyes as the boomerang shifts with its view. And then light begins to aberrate from the boomerang.

And a moonbeam fires from it towards you. It turned my boomerang evil.

However, it rolls a natural two for a six. What's your evasion?

Eleven. Eleven.
The moon beam coasts past you. No impact.
Yeah, I'll slow down,

put my shield down, and in that kind of movement, it blows past me.

I'm behind it. If I eventually come back up, it's the beam like,

full-on come am I. I blast it just slowly dissipates.
You get up, run over, grab your breedbag. And there should be back.
So I threw that. I deal damage with it, so do I still take the 1d8 or no?

You still take 1d8. Okay, so I'll like pick it up and instantly like a hundred images of hellfire.
It goes to my head and I go, oh, that's bad. And I'll take, oh my gosh.

Okay, do I take, I just take the straight D8? Yeah, I don't minus anything. Okay,

it is not reduced by armor. Okay, sorry.
Oh, no. Okay, that's right.

What the hell was that all about?

We'll integrate this later into my life when we get rid of this moon thing. And he's like looking at me.
I'm going, Are you with the witch with the moon thing? You're throwing moons back.

He's throwing moons back. It made my boomerang evil.
It's in moonshades. It's more like a moonerang.
It is. Gremex turned.

Gremex is going to use his axe.

Let's go, Gremex.

Grim the rules! Alright.

12? 12 hits. His vision is 10.
Yes! He's a big moon. So he's a 2d8 plus 6.
Okay, where's my... This is a...
This is an 8.

Alright, we got a 4.

We got an 8.

That's 12. That's 12.

Plus 6. Chase.
18, 18 points damage. Alright, so big old.

Carves into it with the axe. Axe hits.
I see like a little crack kind of appears in the form. The axe is wedged.

Free almost like stumbles back as the eyes follow as it goes.

Who wants to see Grammy next? I'll take Grammc now.

Did you gammax go? Go counterclockwise. Hips, you're up.

All right.

I am going to take out my bow and I'm going to take a shot. Briefly, Australian.
Oh, I'm going to use, um, I'm going to use one of my flaming arrows. Yeah.
Oh, okay. So

good call. So I add, so I do.
Mark one of those. 12 plus magic.

Yep. 16.
16 hits? Yeah. So Grenoel, that is 5d6 plus 8 damage.
Okay, okay. So 5,

6, 11. 11.

5, 16. Yep.

6. Damn.

What was I at? 22. 16, 22.

4.

20. 26.

26, I mean? Oh, that was 5 there. That was 5.
Okay. Great.
So 26 plus eight. Yes.
Dang. Nice.
Yes, plus eight. Solid.
Nice.

Alrighty.

34 points of fire damage, which it has no defense against.

So describe to me how you conjure these flame arrows to hit it.

I just...

Wait, why am I going into fern?

I'm going to take out one of

the

arrows and just kind of

blow on it. As you do do so, like the fire rune that's emblazoned in your hand kind of begins to glow and glow.

The arrow begins to ignite. Flames begin to burn, but it's like a contain, almost like a plasma burn on the tip of the arrow.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, warn us before you do that, okay?

Nah!

It detonates upon Mr. Venus's exterior.

Detonation, the eyes

flicker towards you, almost like burning red as you see a giant black burn mark on the side of his moon face.

That finishes your turn. Yes, it does.
If you think that was the right course of action, just saying. You

sorry, you're up. Is it possible to sort of like distract or otherwise sort of like get its attention? If you want to try.
Okay.

Can I borrow your mirror? Oh, oh, absolutely.

So can I try holding up his mirror to the eye of the creature? To sort of draw its attention potentially to itself. Hold up the mirror in the mirror goes, my God.

And Mr. Venus, who's currently focused on Pips over here, goes,

yeah.

All right, that finishes your goat.

I'm kind of beat up, so I'm just going to take a step back and pop open a little potion and take a swing, because I am not there.

Yeah, and that's the only thing I can do there. Correct.
Use medicine and take it as your action that turn. All right.

Thank you. And that exists to be Mr.
Venus' turn. Mr.
Venus, who's now focused on you, is going to suddenly that little part of space in front of it begins to

build up, much like your boomerang was the focus earlier, except now it's getting larger and larger and intense. Oh, boy.
Before

this, like massive moonbeam of energy just comes towards you, carving through you because it hits everything in the column. Oh, wow.
Okay. I'm glad I took that potion.

Both of you.

That's going to be a 15 to hit, which I think is crazy.

Alrighty, so that's going to be 40-12.

Oh,

that was crazy. 40-12 is a lot.

Oh, oh, no.

35 points of magic damage to both of you.

Okay. Oh, yikes.

My mirror.

The beam slowly fades, and you pull back, and the mirror is intact. It is just black soot covered.
And as you pull it back, it goes, oh, me.

I didn't choose value. Wonderful.
Great idea. I love that.
Well,

that didn't work.

Alrighty.

Maybe

I'll be right back.

Right on, right on. I got my nut hurt.

Well, heck. I guess I'll just run at it and try to smack it in the eyeball because it keeps looking at us weird.
So I'm going to run up and

go for it. Go ahead and attack.

Uh-huh.

One.

Oh, no.

No. Just as the one beam begins to slow and like vanish, you rush forward in the eyes.

A second mine appears and frockets off towards you, trying to envelop you in its terrifying energy. That's only going to be an eight to hit you.

13. 13.

You rush forward, and as you miss, you also slide low and actually glide beneath it as the beam just passes over you, burning backward to the point where Pips has to like duck below it before it takes your head off and just carves off and like sears off a part of the nearby wall as bits of stone kind of

fall because of it and then you manage to get your hammer back up and back into your defensive space. Not today, Moon Man.

Barnaby, you're up. Oh, Cremicon deck.
Listen, I, Mabel, you have looked better when I've seen you earlier.

So I will, I will, I don't have potions, I'm sorry, and I'll take a like a gray rag out from under my robe, and it's sopping wet. It's dripping, and I'll wring it out like this.

I'll run over to you and like press on your foot like a garbage can, and I'll try to wring it out into your mouth, and I'll try to heal you.

I go, this is the best way to dispense medicine. Yo, Barn, I know we're cool.
I got everything. I know.
Open wide. This is ginseng and clover.

Good earns. And the dishes look good.
It tastes like

anti-Islam. I don't know.
I keep my mouth closed.

No, no, no, no. It's not right, and I'll try to show you.

My friend, I know.

I hold your nose closed.

It's baby.

Awesome. And I'll heal you for 50.
50 hit points, you heal.

Awesome. Nice.

Awesome. That finishes Burnaby's Go.
That is now Grannick's Go with Pips on Deck.

Grannick, take a shot. Oh, oh, oh,

oh, oh, oh, oh, Granny!

Thank you, thank you. And then he will take a shot 11 plus

2. Oh, not plus 2.
11? 11 hits? It's

100%, though. Good to know.

Nice job, Grammic.

And Grimmick says, I'm sorry.

Come on, come on.

11 damage.

11 damage. Yep.
Him a goop will not even seem like it did anything. Barely.

Carves a little cut across, but like,

there is a defense boundary that is cutting through each of these hits.

But it's taking damage, and you can see with each hit it's starting to show wear and tear. Mr.
Venus is looking on the side of damaged.

I pat Gremic on the back and say, it's a war of attrition, buddy. You got this.

You got this. Gremic appreciates them back up.
Yeah, you got it.

Finish Grammy's turn. Pips, you're up with Zusari and Deck.

Yeah. Alright, I just rolled a 19.
Yeah.

It's a crit. That's a crit.
No, no, no, no, no.

If I do Flaming Arrow,

does that crit still count?

Usually you say what you're going to attack with first and then roll the hit. Sorry.
Supposed to roll the hit and choose. So if that was with your bow,

then we'll just go with the bow damage on that. And then next time you can go ahead and say if you want to cast it.

We're going to do flaming arrow to begin with? Yeah, so then the crit would be cancelled. Right.
There's.

Well, in this instance, yeah, the crits. Magic doesn't deal crit damage.
That's just for the weapon. Got it.
All right, I'm still going to go with flaming arrow. That's fine.
So, so 19 plus 4, 23.

That definitely hits. Go ahead and roll damage.
So, 5d6 plus 8. 5d6 plus 8.
Okay, here we go.

4,

6, 10,

2,

12,

3,

15, and 5. So 28 points of damage.
Oh, 20. Oh, yeah, 28.
28 points of damage. As you release the secondary flaming arrow, shh, fire it off.

It blows up on the side and you watch like part of its chin

hit the ground and its eyes now go bright white and you hear this dull like

shrieking sound.

Its mouth is going to be closed.

It's terrifying.

Yep. It's just wide-eyed and screaming with its mouth closed.

Hey, Mr. Venus, I feel the same way about magic.

Does that finish your turn? Yes, it does. All right.
So sorry, you're up with Teddy on deck. I'm going to go ahead and just heal.

So I'm just going to use my action to heal. All right, so you heal 50? 50? Yes, 50.
Please.

Can't do anything else. I'm gonna go in for an attack.
I'm just gonna try and put my fist up its nostril. Let's go.
There you go. Come on.

That's 14 to hit. 14 hits, guys.
Damn.

Do the damage. Come on.
Come on. Come on.

14.

16.

24 points of damage. 24 points of damage.
Oh, you open.

You go fist combo. Oh, God, it's gross in the air.
It's gross. Oh, it's green cheese.
Oh, green cheese.

The Mr. Venus Moon is like,

it's barely holding itself up, but it is furious. Its eyes are now emitting this like bright headlight light.
That finishes your turn. Yeah, I think I made it mad.
It's Mr. Venus's turn.

It's gonna do another Crescent Storm. Fair, Pips angered it first.

That is going to be an 18, which I think hits everybody.

So all of you take.

Magic damage. This is magic damage, yeah.

There's so many dice. 19 points of magic damage to everybody.
Oh, yeah.

As those crescents

fire outward and carve through the entire room.

Okay, okay. Eventually, like the pain subsides, and you all like to bleed out a little bit.

That did not feel great. That finishes Mr.
Venus's go. Mabel, you're up.
Oh,

I'm going to jab this dude right in the empty chin. Let's go.

Roll an attack, baby. Let's go.

A plus zero, right? Plus four. Four for your attack accuracy.
Okay. That's a 12? 12.
Hits? Roll damage.

Let's go. Oh, 7 plus 2 plus 11.
That's in math, 20. So that's 21.

How do you want to do that? Yeah.

Describe how you kill Mr. Venus.
Alright, so I go and I go for the whack right on the empty chin thing, and I go,

and I smack it, and then as it hits the chin, it just like starts splitting down the middle As I'm like following it all the way up before.

As you carve upward,

its moon body like cracks like some sort of stone-like porcelain exterior. And as your hammer carves up to the center of it and it tears open, there's just like a dark red, muscly, fleshy interior.

Just muscle tendrils that kind of emanate from it. A horrendous combination of visuals.
As you shh,

carve through its body, and then the two pieces kind of hit the ground and then

burn away in the ash.

In the slow motion, I'm like, groo!

There's your chance for a one-liner. You got a one-liner? Oh, yes, yes.
Come on. Oh, I believe in you.
Uh.

Now you're half the moon, you used to be.

We'll learn. We'll learn to get it.
Yes.

Sun's coming up. Right.
It's like some of this. That's your last phase.
Oh.

Good one,

That's a good one, too.

Thanks for helping Remick.

Came to.

Sneak in, find...

find treasure. No only find creepy moon thing other monster.
Thanks for helping Remic. What you doing?

I mean, pretty much the same thing.

I'm gonna be honest, we're looking for the treasure too, man.

Well, Gremmek, walk with you. Find treasure with Gremmick.

Sure, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, hell yeah.

He's cool, he's cool as hell.

I quite like Gremmick. Yeah, Grammy's good-spirited.
I mean, a sidebar. What if

he's wanting the treasure, and then we're also supposed to get the treasure for Alex?

We can't give him the treasure. So should we just kill him now? No, no, no, no, no.
Whoa, whoa, what you're talking about killing Greg. Gremmick get over there.

Oh, okay. I'm not going to go.

I just.

We're not going to kill Kreme.

There's six of us. Yeah, there's just good

five of us and one of them. It turns out to be useful.
We'll just give him a cut of some of what we pick up.

Like the big thing that's already been taken care of. Okay,

there's lots of us, not a lot of us.

He helped. He totally helped.
He totally

saved Gremic's life, I think. Honor, boys, honor bound to be in the future.
Yeah, we got us.

We got to be fair. It's always fair.

Oh, is he just going to follow us around? Everywhere we go now? Is that what you're saying? Maybe he's so cute. A life-death situation.

Yes. Oh, yes.
It's like the brevity of it is actually quite

imaginative.

That's how we found you. You are a good boy.

Grammy, you look great over there. Where's that mirror? Can it tell him?

Oh, yes, the bush. Wait, you have the mirror.
I do.

Look, all right, all right. You look great.
There we go. All right.

You still have to do it. I have an idea.
I have an idea.

Five bucks. Five potch? Four bucks.

You want to give him five bull deer

Actually half potch. That's what I call potch.
I call him botch. It's 12 and a half potch per buck.

It's just you have to do the conversion. Right, five bucks is less.
It's 12 and a half. I mean, what do you say? We'll give him five.
Five bucks? Do the conversion?

We're looking for like a rune of immeasurable strength.

You think he'll get off with five potch? Well, yeah, I mean, what do you have? Three

ten? Don't make my hand right there.

I don't make my hand right.

No, Mabel, I was going to give you this armor, but now I just don't really

know if it's really worthwhile.

I'm not gonna give Grimmick the armor. Well, I mean, we gotta give him something if he helps out.

I don't wanna kill this guy. Grimmick, cool.
We're not gonna kill him, Grimmick, Grimmick. I have something.
Shh, give me your hands. Let me see your hands.

This is a magical item. It is called a sealant, and I try to put his fingers in the fight-uh, in the finger trap.

There you are.

Everyone kind of has a tiny little bit of a tiny tension.

I have already turned out a ton. It's actually too I gotta make that I'm nervous.
So here, just put that on, you're making me nervous. Oh, for real?

Yeah, you're right in the front line and you're tiny, and I just, I just, yeah.

What was in the room you were in?

Yeah, it's just you gotta put, yeah, just a little extra.

Walk away! This room can't open.

Doesn't open.

No. Is it is it

Have the bars vanished now? Yeah, they vanish. Well, the doors actually burst open now.

Rushing through. So if you guys move back into this space, do you move past the

central floor that you noticed? You're going to hop over the room.

You're going to hop over? Oh, the floor spot? The floor spot? Yeah, go ahead and roll a d20 and add your deck. Well, I was.
Okay, shit.

Hey, before we do this, can we help Grimmick with the trap, please? Oh, he's not in open. Oh, never mind.
He's still going hand at this. Okay.

All right, come here. Come here.
Come here. What did you add?

You just, you just, just, just be calm. Just be calm and just slowly pull it apart.

Yeah, great.

I'll push him and twist and then move off. Buddy.

He's so cute. Come on.
He's got to stay with us.

How did you get in here?

Opening. Our shape.
Oh, okay.

There's an exit. Potentially.
Okay,

I made my jump, so.

21. 21! You leap off to the other side, catch yourself, and you now can look through in this chamber within.
I saw some really heal again.

Is that an aqueduct?

So, indeed,

there is a massive water aqueduct that is just rushing water that comes down this way. There's a portcullis blocking this way, and there is a technically this is a closed-off path right there.

Yo, is that a portcullis over there?

This is my other side of this really quick. Sorry, I'm trying to figure out.
What if we take the water out? The water's rushing.

If we take it out?

Fight the water. Let's go.

It's got to, well, I mean, like, it's got an exit somewhere. Like, if we take

it,

sorry, I've ordered that very strangely. Like, if we go out.
I did think you meant, like, if we remove the water. Yes, I was.
I'm really sorry. I really said it in a weird way.

I mean, take the water as an exit. Oh, like, ride the light.
I follow you, though. I understood that too.
It might be a sewer and leave all sorts of things. Thank you.

It seems like there's like a little place to dig for

stuff over there. Also, did the moon drop anything?

The moon did drop 1,000 punch. Okay.
Oh, zig! Can someone roll a d20 for me, please? Oh, I'll roll it. Let's go.

12. 12? 1,000 punch.
I'm at 40. I don't know that.

1,000 divided by 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 6, 6, 6. Oh, two medicines.

Oh, shh. Oh, did I?

Yeah, I'm good.

I'm rolling Nick.

Who wants some medicine? Oh my god, I'm dying. Yeah, all right, here you go.
Oh, yeah, how is everybody looking? I'll keep

better. But you just got medicine.
I just got medicine. I'm gonna take it right now.
You're gonna take it? Okay, I was everyone else. Everyone gets

166,

including our new friend.

Thanks!

Money, money, money.

Don't spend it all. It looks like he is driven by a sense of adventure.
Yes.

He's profiting in fun. Yeah, I think that's why he's here.

Pulls the shield off the back and the axe.

We're going now. What kill now? Cool.
Man, Grammy's cool as hell. Yeah, Griffith's definitely driven by something.

Okay.

Come on over when everyone's ready.

Let's check out some of this stuff.

Okay, okay. How about we do this? All right.

I got a plan. Now that the door's open, even in the middle of combat, I can't.
I'm going to, because we're still on the other side of the thing, right? Only he's jumping. Only he jumped over.

Okay, I'm going to do the hammer trick again. Flames are going to go off.
When they stop, everybody just cross. I'll cross, and I'll just pluck my hammer off.
You know what I'm saying? Great.

You got it. Okay.

Do I have to roll or anything? No, no. You just said, now that you know what it does, you kind of like lob it out there.

The flames subside. You step onto it.
You hold the hammer. The rest of you cross over easy enough.
You stepping off the final moment. Pling the hammer free once again.

Flames engulf it and then leave it safely behind as your troop has now entered this chamber. The water, and they this goes a bit deeper below, and it is a torrent of water that is just rushing down.

That to like to step too far, it would likely be washed away wherever it's gonna take you.

I feel like one of those one of those piles looks very like conspicuously, maybe has a shiny thing in it. Yes, it does look like it.
You can go and check if you want to.

Cross

here? Oh, yeah. I'm gonna take a medicine.
Or over here, you can go. That one first, yeah.
This one first. Go ahead and roll a d20 and add your luck to it, please.

22.

22.

Rummaging through it,

one, you find a small rolled piece of script parchment. What looks like the remnants of a crushed box and bits of wood here, and the remnants of what was within are found, as you discover

an angry blow scroll, whoa,

which has like the essence of lightning runic magic attached to it.

That's monstrous. It's like a Saturday night after a fight, you know what I'm saying? It's just right there.

As well as a strange star-shaped crest made of like a reddish-brown terracotta material that looks like it's would have been destroyed by whatever this collapsed piece of debris is, but seems to be remaining intact.

So it's just a star-shaped crest. Yeah.
All right, I'm writing that down.

Star-shaped. And that's not like an item that you put in my access in my

side item.

Could I just take a look at this crest and see if I've ever seen anything like this? Go ahead and roll and add your magic.

Magic.

Ten.

ten

no idea, it's star-shaped, it's nifty, and a crest.

Do you think this could be the

child of the moon?

Well, that's not quite what I was thinking, but that is interesting. He's a Venus dude.
Oh, yeah, true. Um,

what if that's like the thing? What if that's the

core in the core? Like, you know, you say the thing? I feel like this is a little anticlimactic to be the thing, but yeah, no, that's I mean, that's possible.

Is it at all reminiscent of the

thing that I turned earlier from the other night? It has a similar sort of, like, the shape that you saw on the first door that you destroyed was almost pentagonal. Thank you for reminding me.

But it had a similar size and shape to it.

And what you saw there that resembled it as well. A similar size and shape of that is a crystal that was embedded in place.

But it has a similar sort of vibe, just a different sort of size correlation. Okay, well, just we'll save that for later.
Just in case. So what the heck is it? It's a star thing? It's just a star.

Ah, keep that thing away from me. That might be magic.

It might be.

I think it's cedar, man. I don't even know.
It smells nice. Okay, very friendly.
All right.

Yeah, that's nice. Yeah, yeah.
I gotta admit, it's pretty nice. Yes.

Fresh. All right, I'll maybe take a look across

the other pile. Yeah.

Over here then? Go! Oh, God, we're done.

Spring break. Jeez.
Supposed to have higher vision. So we're about to overhear you me? Yeah.
Okay. You inspect the thing? Go ahead and roll a D20 and add your luck, please.

Oh, I don't have a lot of luck.

12. 12?

You rummage through it and find just mostly debris.

Does anyone else want to give it a look? How's that debris? I can give it a look. No, no, no, there's just a lot of it.
I mean, you fall with it. Once you hit it, once you hit it, it's hits up.

Oh, okay.

Is that a rock pile or just part of the wall? This looks like a piece of rubble that has fallen. Can I stick my hand in the water and take a little sip? Sure.
Oh,

you reach in. It's freezing cold, and you get a little bit.
Oh, geez. It's very clear, very clean.

Oh, it tastes pretty good. Y'all want a little sip? Get a little hydration afterwards? Do I got any health for that? No.
But you do feel refreshed.

You are hydrated. This is not strong.
Hey, Bremick, you want some of this water? It's drinkable. You say that and you look over and come already over that.
You want

that's my boy, dude.

Man, you remind me of the kid I met earlier. earlier.

Can I walk across the aqueduct to this little gated section here? Sure. See what's beyond, if I can see anything.

It does continue beyond that into a longer hallway, and like the water seems to rush and turn around the corner along that path, but it's kind of a little dark beyond that.

It looks like there's a slight,

a brief period where there's a roof, as opposed to like the open air above you.

You come to the door and look at it, though, and there is a star-shaped indent on that portclus side. Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding.
Sensei, the item you found, I believe

I believe it belongs here.

I'm gonna walk over and look.

Looks about the right, shape, and size. Wait, Grimmick.

Which way did you come from? When you came back to the corner, points that direction. Okay.

And as he points out to the back, you do see, like, like the waterway kind of disappears beneath the wall that's just beyond that.

And you see there's a slight crack in the upper corner of the chamber with a bit of sunlight that's coming through on where that is enclosed.

Looks like there was a damaged part of that upper wall that he either managed to carve through or squeeze through. Grimmick, you just crawling through the wall, dude? Hey, hey, hey, crawl through.

Heavy, feel weak. Come try.

Scary.

Very resourceful, Grimmick. Do you know what that would is this way?

Water carry me out. Yeah, okay.

All right. I say, take a step back.
Let's see what happens here.

You press it inside. I need you to.
No, okay.

The porklis.

Man, that was easy. That's how it's done.

I guess it wasn't.

I think it was just a lock.

Okay, yeah, just some kind of. Maybe it's connected to the water.
Exactly, yeah. It's just

a weird-looking key. Sometimes keys look weird.
It was made of wood and it smelled nice. Alright,

I kind of wanted it, but that's okay.

That should have been valuable. You should have mentioned that.
You should have mentioned that.

I'll ask Mabel to smash through it.

Round two.

I love it.

I love our dungeon crawl. This is exciting, dude.

Dungeon crawls are the best.

Oh, dude. A water, a massive waterfall.
It's released out of the side of the chamber. There's a mechanism above it where it looks like some sort of a dam,

some sort of a massive stone clockwork piece is currently held in place and the water is being released from an opening just splashing into this and causing the current to rush past it is rushing this way and then this way as well through a different opening.

Oh, and where's that water coming from?

What's the deal with that?

I think we have to figure that out. You need to turn it off.
Water is rushing out this way. I apologize.
Oh, okay. So we have to turn it off.
I mean, that might be the way to go.

Wait, we can't jump over this aqueduct.

We can try it. We can try it.
That's how I say it. Yeah, go ahead.
I'll give it a try. I'll try to leap over it.
No, no, no, hide, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on.

Before we do this, I would say if you're going to try and leap over, we're going to leap over

there, and we're going to take a step back so that if you fall in the water, we can try and catch you. This is wisdom.
Okay. Right there.
I got to admit, that's writing that down. Good point.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Good point.
Cross over aqueducts without

a friend. Always have a spotter.

Always have a spotter. Need a spotter.

May I heal myself? If you have a medicine to use, I do. I'm going to heal myself.

All right. I'm going to go up to the tippy top of that waterfall while everyone waits behind, I'm assuming.

All right, yeah, we got it.

So the rest of you are waiting back there just in case as the water's rushing past. All right, now go ahead and roll a D20 and add your decks.
All right, y'all ready? Yeah, here I go.

Try to use my hammer as like a kind of pole ball kind of situation. Heck yeah.
Like I go like, boom, and try to use the

16 plus 4. Oh, easy enough to do.
You leap over and land on the opposite side, hammer kind of spinning in the air behind you as you catch it on the other end.

Three-point land.

Yeah, that was awesome! Good job. All right, now you're going to get up there and you're going to shut off the machine.
Okay.

I look at the machine. You look up at it and it's a good 25 feet up there.
There's a massive cliff face. You can see, now that you've reached this opposite side,

I have a stronger view

down this way. It looks like there is a further path.
There's an opening this way.

Which actually you can kind of see from where you're standing.

So

you have a perspective on all of these different avenues here. Whoa, sick.
Hey guys, it's awesome over here.

Y'all want to give it a shot?

Not really. All right, just me, I guess it's not.
See if you can shut off, try and shut off the machine. Okay, okay.

I'll try to join. Join them.
I'll try to join you over there.

I think I'm quite

dexteritis. All right, so you go ahead and off off the opposite eye.
The rest of you guys are sitting back there just in case that Zusarium fails. Roll into 20.
Add your decks.

I'm just about to say you need a 12. So maybe you just hit it on the opposite.

You leap over the side and like catch the edge and like have to catch yourself.

I got you.

And indeed Mabel grabs you and pulls you to your feet and you're fine.

It wasn't as cool as mine, but I appreciate the effort.

It really was a drama. It was cool because of the power of friendship.
That was the coolest part about this. You were here to catch me.

I'm writing that down. You're right, though.

Let's check this little nook right here. Okay.

Is there anything behind that little...

We shift over here?

Okay. You look into this nook, glancing around that side, and you do indeed see over on this end a small chest.

Would you do the honors? Would you want to do the honors? No, I feel like you should. Yeah,

you're really excited about that stuff. I insist.
You were the first here. You deserve it, you know? No, no.
You know, I couldn't. I couldn't.
You should go ahead.

The honorable thing would be to let the first person who jumped across open the chest.

Okay.

I'll give it a shot. Yeah.

All right. I just got leather body armor, plus five defense.
Who cares?

I go to cautiously open up the treasure chest. Okay, and I take a step back as quick as I can.

You go and open the treasure chest, roll, and add your dexterity, please.

Two plus four. No, two plus four.

No. You go and you like kick it open and right as you step backward, you catch a bit of like slick vine that was on there and shh, fall back and land on the ground just as

this cloud emanates from it. Shhh, fills the area and surrounds you.

And you fall asleep. Oh.

What's going on over there?

Um

Mabel attempted to open the chest.

And then you fall asleep as it fills the rest of the chamber.

Oh, well.

Okay, we're gonna have to deal with that.

Spot me. I'm gonna...
I'll run down.

Good. I'm gonna take a leap.
Rolling out decks there, you gotta be to 12.

11. 11.
You leap and then shh, shh, shoot.

Both of you need to try and catch them. You either roll decks or strength.

You gotta be to 10 to catch him. Alright.
Oh, nice. Okay.
16.

Pull it up out of the water. You're waterlogged and freezing, but you're safe.
There's got to be a better way to do this. I have something for you.

I'll head to a rock that is slightly above room temperature.

It'll keep you...

It'll keep you above room temperature.

But it's somewhere safe. And I need it back because you know it's something too.

All right, I'm going to try to take a leap over. Go ahead and roll and add your decks.
Okay.

Natural 20. Yeah.
I'll say for a natural 20, you get to choose one other person to join you. All right.
As you confidently run and then grab somebody as you know you're about to make it.

What's your ducks? Four, so. Okay.
Barnaby, come on. Okay.
Yeah.

Let's do the thing that we always do when we travel around.

I pick you up and then I throw you for you to grab my arms and travel me over.

That's how physics works. Yes.

Dear BG mechanics.

Oh, that's wall in the Northwest. Oh, I love it.

Oh, the physics engine on this is real weird. I love it.

As you throw pips, and pips, right as you leave, like a trapeze duo, you grab the forearms of Barnum and tug the momentum of the throw and your power. It makes sense somehow.
And you both

land on the opposite end while the two friends are asleep on the ground. And you are on the opposite side.

All right, I'm going to take one more running leap. I can do this.
I I don't care how bad my back feels right now. You have to be to 14 now.
Now I have to be to 14? I'm just gonna pause.

Well, actually, I'll keep it at 12, but you don't have anyone helping you there. I know.
Can I pause on the other side? No, no, no, no. You're good.
You're good. Okay.
I actually.

How tall are these walls, by the way? Like the rock wall? I'd say like 15 or so. Okay, so that's too high to do.
Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. Am I still asleep? Yes.
Yes, you are. Me and the all right.

Come on, don't be a jerk. Hey, not 20, thanks.
Oh! There you go. So the rest of three of you leap behind and just catch yourselves as your two compatriots are currently in a deep slumbered state.

All right, I'm gonna go over. I don't know if this is gonna work, but I'm gonna go over and slap Mabel in the face.
Okay. Wake up!

As you step over to start to approach that area, you see a flash of like red and purple out of the corner of your eye from down this area.

What was that?

You glance over and you see like

another flash of red. Two bits of red.
These like suddenly large red squares trimmed in white, like two massive tarot cards of just reddish color just kind of

drift outward

in your direction.

I am slapping both of them awake. We're like, we're dead.

They are still asleep. It takes a certain level of force to wake them up as they are magically put under.
As these two

floating cards approach, you watch as emerging from the red

a blue face with a gesture head emerges with strange hands and white glowing eyes from each of them as they kind of

pour out.

And as they look at each other, they glance up.

As a Mr. Venus descends along with them.

But no,

dude.

Mr. Venus rules.

Oh, love him.

Mr. Venus, pretty great.

That's two nightmares.

You had so much fun with this.

Wow. Boy, I wish I was awake to see this.

So, as you all rush into this point, both of you are currently asleep. Okay.

Everyone please roll and add your speed even those that are unconscious. Gosh.
Okay. Okay.
All right. Oh boy.

13. 11.

Well, he'll call them because all right, so

25 to 20 20 to 15? Uh no

15 to 10? Uh 13. 13.
12. Both you guys roll up.
Please!

7. 4.
Great. All right.

Mabel. Mabel.
Okay.

Barnett Barn. I get to snore first.
And then me.

What are you?

I'm 12. Or 12.
What are you dreaming about?

I got it at an 8. Two pickles.
All right.

So

I go great.

And then.

Pickles. Zusari.

I got it in 10.

Oh, so. Oh, oh, so Teddy.
Till pickles. You're next then.
Teddy. Okay.
Teddy, Zusari, Tilli.

Okay.

Oh,

where's our cardboard?

Two screenmates. Yeah, roll for Grimmick.
Roll for Grimmick. I'll roll.

Who's next up playing Grimmick? It would be me. I haven't acted as Grimmick.
Oh, you want to act as Grimmick? Act as Grimmek, dude? Yeah, go ahead.

I feel like me being separate for Grimmek is a lot more.

People, Grimmick. I just want to be around Grimmek.

That's

before me.

So Grimmick comes before me. So

it's, yeah. Barnaby, Grimmick, me.
Grimmick's cool as hell, dude.

Hell yeah. All right, the nightmares go first.
As both of these strange gesture things kind of like withdraw into the cards and the cards begin to spin.

Oh no. As they spin, the red face begins to change to different elemental images.

Water, lightning. All these different things are flickering through.
Somebody roll. Actually, no, I'll just roll a d4 here.
The first one.

That's a four. What the hell is that? It's quite a d4.
You watch as suddenly multiple snakes of fire emerge and begin to swirl and wrap the space here.

Rolling against everybody. That's going to be a 12 to hit.
Who does the 12 hit?

Is it magic? It is magic. Yeah, but it's evasion.
What's your evasion? Oh,

yeah. So it only hits you two in the back.
You two take

that sounded like a lot. 15 fire damage to each of you.
Okay. While the rest of you avoid it.

The other one

is a one.

That's going to be a wind.

Everybody in that back row, you feel the wind begin to pick up and beautiful pink cherry blossom leaves kind of swirl to space and you feel your senses beginning to dull. I like it.

Everyone in the back row falls asleep. Oh, oh no.

So currently, the only conscious members of the team

are Teddy and Gremy.

Gremek!

Oh my goodness. Gremeck's cool as hell, dude.

This is like a dream scenario for me, so you better take a band of me.

To that point, that finishes the nightmares go.

You're asleep. Barnaby, you're asleep.

Gremek, you're up.

I'm going to attack with

my axe.

There we go. I don't know.

My axe. All right, to which one? The one on the

one on the right, actually. Okay, let's go.
So that's 12 to hit? 12 hits. That actually just hits.
All right, 12 just hits. Good to know.
Great. That's 2d8 plus 6.
So that's due. Ay!

16, 17, 18, 19.

22 points of damage. Max damage.

Nice! Crypto gets a heavy hit on that. The right-hand nightmare, carves into it.
The card kind of withdraws for a second. It's almost like a water drop, kind of ripple like a

through it.

And one of the the hands emerges and pulls its way out you see the hand is now bloodied from where the axe struck it and the gesture head reaches out like no facial features just the white glowing eyes it's kind of like

looks at the rest of you

and in my sleep i go

teddy you're up

i feel like i want to attack mr moon

i think oh by the way this unfortunately mr moon is in the back row yeah but i have a scroll oh you do yeah yeah

so i'm gonna take out my angry blow scroll and I'm gonna I'm just gonna blow that moon

You heard me

I unconsciously roll away a little bit

Do I even have to do I even have to roll for this or do you not just does damage it's gonna so it just is eight d8 lightning damage to Mr. Venus

okay d8 8d8 so I'm just gonna I'm gonna use calculator because my brain is broke here we go that's fine

that's uh

1313

Uh, and then we're gonna do

that's uh god terrible of 20 seven, that's twenty, and then two more.

Oh, that's terrible.

Uh, and then uh 26 26 points of lightning damage as you read the scroll out loud, and then as it evaporates, you see like the lightning rune in the air for a second, and then a matching version of it appears above Mr.

Venus before a bolt of lightning

strikes into the top. Shhh, the eyes

kind of like go wild for a second before

onto you and prepare for a total eclipse, motherfucker. Oh my.

Am I see if I like write that down? Never stop.

Never stop. Never stop.

I love it.

Mr. Venus is going to crescent storm, angered by your angry blow, even further angry to angry blow you back.

Whoa.

As

all the crescent moon energies emerge and shh cut through all of you, knocking you all back to consciousness. However, okay, that's right.
That's gonna be bad. Yo, what the hell is going on?

That's a 14 to hit, which I think hits everybody.

So everybody takes.

Could have been worse.

16 points of magic damage across the board.

That's so good. Your magic damage is so crazy.
I don't fuck with magic.

What the hell is going on with the cards? Am I dreaming? Didn't we already defeat this thing? They're more than one. It's not just, you know, there's lots of.

At least two didn't come at you at the same time.

Randomly checking to see what would show up. All right, cool.
So,

finishing Mr. Venus's go.
Zusari, you're up with Pips on Deck now that you're conscious. Okay.

I

see the bloody hand on this one, and I register that. That means that he's been hurt.
So,

actually,

do do you want to team up and do our attack

on your turn? I can hold off.

If you're ready.

I'm. You know what?

You should do it. It's cool as hell.

Well, do you need to recover first? Yeah, I need to recover first. Also, we'll only hit two of them if we do it right now.
I got a medicine I can give it to you on my turn.

We'll hold off. We'll hold off, but.
We can hold off. Yeah.
Yeah, we'll hold off. We'll see if we can because we'll see where it should go.
Then I'll attack. Let's go.

I'll attack the already harmed one. It's possible the moon will come forward, too.

12. 12 is exactly what you need.
Nice.

This was a terrible roll. Oh.

Five. No, one, two, three.
Yeah, five.

Plus your...

Oh, right.

I don't know if I've even been adding that this whole game. Nine.

Nine. Alright, got it.
So you go in.

You're still kind of slightly woozy from waking up, and you just get one hit that kind of like glances off the side of the card.

It kind of folds like in that way that a card in the spokes of a bike sounds like

right.

That took a hit. All right, that finishes your go.
Pips, you're up.

All right, I'm gonna try a firewall for the front row. For the front row, okay.
All right, all right. All right, thank you for announcing.
I'm backing up. All right, so that's a you're welcome.

That is a 13.

13 hits them both. Yes.

All right, so that's 96 plus eight. Yeah, let's go.
Okay, so four,

1.

5. 2.

That's 7.

1.

8. You got this bit.

2.

10.

Come on.

One.

11.

5. Okay.
Okay. 16.

2. Okay.
18.

4.

Okay. Less.
22.

6. So 28.
28 points of damage to both.

Plus eight.

Plus eight. Oh, yeah.
36. 30.
Oh, that will be enough to destroy this. Yeah.

That's very incredible. Thank you so much.

Ball of fire just.

Bursts up front and just burns across his way, incinerating this card of the nightmares.

Streaks and vanishes. This one, the flames catch on the edges of the card kind of burn black.

Its eyes get brighter and angry as it begins to retreat into the card, ready to call forward whatever runic magic it wishes. And that's all enemies in a row.
Take that. Yeah, in a row.

So it hit both of them. Awesome.
Okay. Hell yeah.
All right, that finishes Pipsco.

Now it is the nightmare that's still out there's turn. Let's see what it casts there.
That's going to be a three.

Three. All right.
So that's going to be plus four. So it's going to go ahead and choose.

It's going to choose you. Yep.
Because you're hurting. That's cool.
That's going to be a 19 to hit. And it hits.
So you watch as the card curls inside and it spins.

The different runic symbols appear until the one for water operates and you watch as a massive streak of water magic kind of shifts up, forms a sphere, and then

slams into you for

15 points of magic damage.

And then you watch as the magic returns the water and it heals itself a little bit. Oh, I hate that.

That's some evil shit.

Finishing its go, you're up, up, Mabel. Oh, bar to be on deck.
I start swinging around my hammer a little bit. I'm like, I'm back up.
I'm ready to go. Let's go.

I just go in for the big swing on the nightmare. Go for it.
We're for an attack. Good call.
Face. Hell yeah.

17 plus what?

17 plus 4. That definitely hits.
Go and roll damage. 2D 12 plus 11, baby.
8 and 2 plus 11. 21 points of damage.
Nice, nice, nice. Let's go.
Let's go. Oh, that's a heavy hit.
It's looking real hurt.

You swam it hard. If it hadn't healed itself, that would have been enough.
But it just, it's hanging on by a thread. Literally, like, part threads are hanging from it.

And it's like, like, the gesture is almost like a broken marionette barely hanging inside the middle of the card. Man, this thing sucks.

Agreed.

All right, finishing

your go. Barnaby, you're up with Gremic on deck.
Okay, I'm going to try to make it so this guy does not hit us in his next initiative. So I'm going to go.

I'm starting to agree with you, Mabel.

This magic shit sucks, and I'm going to like throw my robe back to reveal like a small pouch on the side and like a holster, and it'll open up automatically as like sand, purple sand,

flow flies out of it as it turns into the shape of a rune. And then I'm going to take my hand out and blow it towards the moon to try to make it fall asleep.
Oh,

go ahead and roll. Okay.

This is D20 plus magic. Oh, yikes.
Okay, 14. It's evasion is 10.
Does that work? Yeah.

So you watch, I'll say, I'll blow the sand out,

and as it falls asleep, I'll say, good night, sweet moon.

Writing that down.

Oh, I think you moved.

You look at the mirror and say, the mirror is like a sound.

It's so cool.

Like that the energy is like building up and as the wind kind of

dust comes by goes

one eye at a time. I was gonna say, it's a

JRPG, so we can get the little snot bubble.

The snot bubbles happening on the side.

I'm just trying to see if it's not. And also, its defense is zero on the next time that hits it.
Sorry to be don't tell a damn soul, but that was cool as hell. Oh, my God.
I took a look at the return.

Grimmick,

smelling blood

from the nightmare in front,

tries to

give it an attack, finish it off. 12, 14,

14, yeah. Yay!

2d

8, okay.

Go ahead, Grimmet. Is this the 8? That's the 8, yep.

4. Actually.

And...

6.

Plus 6, 12.

Grimmick carves through the other nightmare.

Yay, Grimmick!

So, can we just leave it sleeping? You could.

The only problem is I fear that next time we go into combat, we will also have to face it again. But maybe not.
But it's sleeping, you know? They only really wake up if you smack them really hard.

That's true. Remember, well, magic eventually wears, though.
Eventually, that's fair. Do we want to...
Up to you guys. We can end it or we can walk away.

I'm trying to consume resources for our own sake, so

I think it would be kind of funny if we just left it. Okay, I want to do that?

You seem really excited for us.

I'm doing whatever. I'm not funny.

This is an interesting scenario. We also have, because we have a run feature, so like we can can do it,

we can just, technically speaking, we can leave a fight. So here's what I'll say.

If you want to try and leave it there, I'll let you make a group run roll

via the rules here. I kind of love it.

And if we fail, we fight it. Yeah.
Okay. Right? So, or you can just

jump off.

I'll just say that the battle will end regardless, but it'll inform other things. Oh, I like that.
What is that? Yeah, I love that.

I love that. I love information.

But I mean,

I know, I mean, we beat one before.

I know, that's true. We could, do you want to just go for it? I mean, it is funny to run.
I feel like

kind of funny to just be like, yeah. Yeah.
But we're so close. Maybe we can use it to get us up there or something.
Like, loses like a hook. Just

drag the floating.

Before we leave, let's all take a selfie with the remote.

What's a selfie? I pulled the old camera up over my Twitter.

I think a limelight on my right.

It wakes

I'm amused either way, so I'm down for whatever. Let's do the run.
Let's try to run.

All right, everyone, roll a d20 and add your luck. Oh, God.

Plus zero.

Next one. 21.
Six.

Eleven.

Four.

Sixteen. And 21, you said? Someone had to beat a 20 for this to succeed.
Oh,

my God. Oh, my God.

As you all slowly... This is the slowest, quietest run ever.
As you all just gently tiptoe away.

You're going to say,

And slowly, quietly, you all say goodnight, Moon. Has it taken any damage yet? No, that's not a good one.

It got hit once. Not great.
Okay. So.
And with that, you leave the moon to sleep. That will definitely not come back and fight us anymore.
No, no, that's fine.

Everything's fine. So, I mean, can I tiptoe? Is the cloud of sleep smoke still over? No, that is dissipated.
The chest remains open. Yeah, yeah.
So back chest. Can I tiptoe back to the chest?

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I opened the chest.

You didn't deserve that.

You got taken this away from me. I fell asleep for this.

Pretty much fell asleep. You already have.

I'm going to go over the chest.

I'll be like, hey, hey, come with me.

I like

support. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You find a thick vial of a medicinal liquid as you get a mega medicine. Ooh.
Mega medicine. Yo, you know what?

My man. You're so kind.
Yeah. I'll be sure to use the flyer.
Can I hit that 40 if you're just going to be able to get it? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Take a hit of that.

Can I take a peek and see if there's anything?

Can I take a peek and see if there's anything behind the waterfall thing? I like that.

Behind the waterfall, there. Yeah,

go ahead and roll a detent. Or d20, sorry.

And add luck.

Yeah, we'll add luck to this one.

19.

19.

Plus luck is.

That was.

I only have a plus one I rolled a night looking behind the waterfall The water is not emanating from beneath it is definitely this whole thing, but there is a small alcove behind it the waterfall itself is rushing heavily and to try and get through would be very dangerous But it is not impossible

There is something out this way, but I'm sure

I think we gotta turn this thing off Okay You tell me there's an alcove behind this aqueduct? Yeah,

that's why I just said that there's there's an aqueduct behind this aqueduct.

Did you not hear Pip when you're going to be able to do that? Yeah, didn't I just say that? I just said that. I just wanted to make sure I was clear.
Right? We wanted to make sure he was clear.

Thank you, Gremek.

See, this is why Gremek's waiting a little bit.

Let's put a little Lamrador face.

Let's try and go through. There's a door back there.

Let's try and go through that door. Okay, okay.

Wait, wait. Did we see the stairs?

Yeah, there's like a little gap on the side, right? Let's go through that gap.

This technically is covered. Oh, okay.
I wasn't already. Okay, for real, though.

Yeah, nah.

Yeah, good call, though. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, let's try to go in there. Let's go in that little door?

Can I see if there's any little more indentations? It looks a little similar. Unless it, I don't know if it's similar to the door we just.
This one has another indentation in it. This one has

like a three-pointed star kind of vibe to it. Like it's almost like three individual points.
Same size as the others, but just that kind of that crest is empty in that shape.

Oh man, we need a good smelling wooden key.

We can just like break off two of the points.

The other one's still stuck in the other door. Oh yeah, that's right.
Okay. But there's a hallway.

I think there's a hallway over there. That was pretty clever, though.
No, that was a good thought. Can you move further into here? Yeah, I didn't even see that.
Let's see what we got. There's a voice.

Shit.

And there is

just an empty chamber. I go in the chamber and yell to see if it echoes on the channel.

It does echo pretty well. Okay.

Can I like check over and see if the moon stirs?

What do you think he dreams? Deeply on settling. Deeply on settlement.

Interesting question. Does he have like a daily life that he like kind of recalls in his sleep? I don't know.

He works nights.

Yeah, so not just an empty chamber.

Is there a... I can't really see.
Is there like any kind of door or anything here? No door on this side. No, it just kind of finishes the chamber here.
There's just this element here. Man.

I think we need to go across. Yeah.
Or at least a couple of us do. Maybe I should hit it with my hammer.

The wall?

I mean, I could try the wall, but I was thinking the door. Oh.
You know what I'm saying? That's worked twice before. before.
I don't know.

This door looks pretty secure. I'm just going to do it.
Can you make too loud of a noise? Yeah, can you do it like

quietly?

Put a blanket over it.

Can you put a blanket over it?

As you do it, I'll cough. No, go ahead.

Can somebody go over to Mr. Venus and just kind of like, you know,

cover his head? My hands are not zombing off his ears.

Does it look like there are any ear holes

on Mr. Moon, on Mr.
Venus? You walk over and look towards it.

You have no idea the physiology of a sentient, weird moon beast.

Is he easily movable?

He is floating in space in a way that defies your understanding of physics and the world around you.

So maybe he's still floating while he's sleeping. Oh, Oh, yeah.

Oh, that's sick. Can I just certain if there are any like

weak points on it? On the moon? While he's sleeping? Yeah. Can I like while he's sleeping? He has no means of defending himself.

He does his offensive zero until you hit him. And then, but like.

What if we did like a

super five-person attack? Just like make up right now, you know? That'd be pretty cool.

Yeah.

Or we could blindfold him. I have to go.
Do you know? If if I recall, there was another, there was another path. We might actually be able to find a key if we go down the other.

There's like other places to check. So before we.
But what about blindfolding the moon? That seems like a good plan.

You're going to wake up the moon when you blindfold. That's with the moon.
Okay. That's also happening.
Look at Venus, you guys.

What if a couple of us try to go over there? Yeah. I mean, I can try.
I'll volunteer. I'll go with you.
I mean, let's go. We'll go together.
We're going to go together. Okay.

All right. Hey, I have an idea.

uh how how like hard and dense is the flow of the water coming down it's pretty intense like it's it's a rapid flow so it would carry you and immediately drag you down okay my hammer's like mad heavy could i like put my heavy let my hammer down and kind of like block the water flow for a little bit so people could just kind of step through you can certainly try how deep is that water

i'm strong enough to grab it okay get it back or something at best you could tell it's probably about 10 to 15 feet deep

how long's your hammer not how tall are you? Not very tall.

I don't know.

You don't know if that adjusts in certain places. From what you can tell, you can't really see the bottom.
You just see if it gets dark beneath and just.

What if we look for like vulnerabilities in the wall on this side and we just try to like break through the stones? Yeah, but there's an aqueduct going through.

Oh, yeah, can we just like fly through? Did you scale the wall up at all? You could try. It's about 15 feet up.
Is it open up at the top? Oh, it is scaled up a platform on the wall, yeah.

We have scaled walls too much bigger than the wall. Oh, That's right.
What am I saying? We've done so many moves and we've tried to. Shall we? And I'll clap my hands and eat yours.

Physics defying throw come.

Ellie, queer.

All right.

I think this is a good plan. I think this is a plan.
Yeah, I'm in this. All right, all right, let's try it.
All right. So the two of you are going to attempt to clamber up.
Yeah. All right.

We've done this so many times in the past.

So I'll need you both to roll a strength check or a dex check, your choice. Okay, okay.

But you both need to succeed for this to work and you have to get at least a 14.

Nat one.

Natural 20.

Wow.

What a vibe. Can I help? What a weird balance.
Here's what I'll say. The natural natural 20, because this is the universe of Sukuna is a balance between order and chaos based on the 27 true runes.

I will enable you both. I will enable you both a re-roll.
Oh. So as opposed to an immediate failure, both those kind of bounce each other out, I'll give you both one more reroll.
That's fun.

Wow.

Three?

One.

Oh, that was almost a really good one. Okay.

Um, uh.

12. Oh!

That's okay, that's okay. That's all right.
You both, you, you grab her and you lift up and you catch the edge in your fingers. Get it.

And just scrape back down.

Well, that was a good time. Usually it's a wall.
Then you can grab it.

Yes.

Can we give one round really quick just to give it a roll? To what?

To jump over? Well, I was just actually going to give you a fast roll. Oh, because I'm pretty tiny, eh? Yeah.
Yeah, you can.

You both want to get it shot up. It's too heavy to bring my hammer, so it just had to be me.
At best, I can grab your hammer and I can actually try and shot put you if you're holding on.

Then then you can let go of the hammer and see what you're doing. Oh, that's pretty slow.
That's pretty funny. Honestly, that's pretty funny.
All right, all right, let's do that.

All right, you guys roll strength or decks, your choice, and you both have to succeed on a 14 difficulty. All right,

I'll do strength because you're gonna be hanging on to the head of the hammer, and I'm just gonna kind of try and throw you right up there.

Yeah, all right, so it's just me, or no, we both you, it'll be just you getting up there, but we both roll 14.

14. No, not one.
Oh,

so

fuck. I've rolled so many not ones today.

Takes your hammer and flings you and you go

and suppose going up on the wall you just go straight up and drop down. Did you see anything?

Bro!

You pass over this and I have another hand. I went to cash to my

hammer wielder dude.

The Mr. Venus like

shifts a bit in its sleep. It remains magically asleep, but it won't last forever.

Okay, yeah, yeah, we gotta try something else. Okay, let's try this other hallway.
Let's see if we can do it. So we should jump across and then jump across again.
I don't know what else to do.

What if we're gonna do a dude? We got a sleeping Mr. Moon.
Why don't we just

move him, nudge him, and

climb him? And then try to climb up his lithe body. You know what I'm saying?

That is certainly an idea. I don't know

what we want to do.

Come on.

Is he far up or is he like close on the ground? He's like three feet off the ground. He's really tired of the ball.

Can I just gently just try to see if I can push him?

If he moves. You push and he moves slightly.
Oh boy, this is insane. You be ready to attack if it gets weird.

I'm just

gonna move him up against the wall.

I'm just gonna move him up against the wall.

Weirder shit has happened. I'm going to figure out the confounding.

Team meeting. Team meeting.
Grimmick. Stay over there.
Okay. Okay.
Why don't we just get Grimmick to push him?

I mean, I know he's sick as hell, but

Grimmek is a little bit wilder than all of us. I know I trust.

Gentle hands. Gentle hands.
Go ahead. Gentle hands.
I have just one hands. Let's go.
Okay. All right.
I just don't want to put you in harm's way, but. Thank you, Mabel, for thinking this.

But I feel bad.

Okay, just a slow, easy push.

Okay, slow, easy push. Deezy does it.
Okay.

Sleepy times. Where are you pushing Mr.
Veech?

Against the wall.

No, like against over here. Oh, yeah, we should be able to get it.
Because the machine's up there. Oh, yeah, you're right.
Oh, yeah, you're right.

But then we're not going into that room.

Could we also have pushed him floating above the water and then we walk across him? That's another idea. It doesn't matter.

You're right. What do you want to do? Do you want to.
Let's push him up there because there's a staircase

into that. I'll like sit on him like a little boat.

And we'll be sitting on the moon. So you push him which way? This way, this way? This way? This way?

I say you push him up to where the machine. And then try and try to turn it off.
And try and climb up to the machine. You move him here against the edge.

All right, push him, which kind of rests against the wall for the hell of it because it's fun.

Yeah.

Okay. Now, he's like a good, you know, 10 or so feet tall.

Can get you most of the way there if you manage to not wake him in the climb. Who is climbing, Mr.
V? Can I? Who has this climb? Who is the most dexterous? Do you want to try it?

He's got some high decks.

I have a plus four to decks. Okay, I do two.
I don't have to. Okay, you do two?

Okay, so maybe you are our most dexterous. Do you both want to go or just one? I mean, I feel like we had this disagreement about the dexterity.

You haven't tried anything. I haven't tried climbing yet.
So you go for it. All right, so.
You got this, okay? So you have to be a 12. I have to be the 12.
Come on, Zoo. I believe in you.

To not wake him.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Nine.

Nine. So you do climb up, Mr.
Venus, as you like slowly

getting up to the top. You get to the very top of the crest, and there's like a four-foot leap.
to the edge of the cliff and you feel the moon

shift and you feel that like bassy

the The rest of you watch the eyes.

No.

Like her open.

So we're going to go into battle here. Do you want to join the battle with them, or do you want to try and make it to the top of the chest?

I'll try to make it to the top. All right.
I believe in you.

So, with it, we go into the remainder of the mystery.

Worth it, worth it. Have it all in.
All right, all right.

We are exactly

without Dusari, who is currently up here. Yeah.
Nice.

So, with that, we go back. I'm just going to keep the original initiative that we had for this,

just to keep it easy. Which brings us to

actually, no, no, let's re-roll because it's been a minute.

I was asleep, too. Can I

play as Grimmick in this round since I'm not currently in the battle? Yes, you may. That's brilliant.
All right, so 25 to 20. 22.
22.

Two. 17.
16. 19.
All right, cool. All right, so is that first Teddy? No, No, it's Barnaby's then me.
Should I put it back to sleep?

Alright, and then 15 to 10? Or 10 to 15, I'd say?

13, sorry. 13 for Pips? Is he going to be on the 17? Oh, I did not get that.
Alright, thank you.

Wait, so it's Barnaby, Teddy, Mabel. Mabel.
Pips.

All right, then what did a Grimmet get?

Oh, four.

Okay, got you.

Alright, so top of the round. Barney, what you doing? Sec, I will throw my boomerang at him.

I go, well,

we learned one way. That would be nine.

Nine.

I'm going to take the D8.

I'll come back and regrettably grab it.

That's not bad. I'll take one damage.
Not too bad. He's going to kill him someday.

Teddy, you're up. All right, I'm just gonna go for

punch him in the face again. I don't know what else to do.

Here we go.

11? 11 hits. Oh, my God.

No, this is... It's not bad.

16, 17, 18, 19.

26 points of damage. 26 points of damage.

All right.

Heavy hit. Once again, it's got a fairly thick defense on it.
So when you slam it, your knuckles hurt a little bit, but still, a bit of damage gets pushed through there. Well done.
Finishing your go.

It's now Mr. Venus.
Yep. Mr.
Venus is going to Moonbeam

this column. Gremek and Barnaby.
Oh,

great.

That is going to be a 20, dirty 20 on that.

So that is 3d12 magic damage down that column as both Gremek and Barnaby take.

That's not a great damage roll. That's 12 points of magic damage.
Could have been a lot worse.

Alrighty, finishing Mr. Venus's go.
Uh, it brings us to uh Mabel with

Pips on deck. Kick its ass.

All right.

Same old, same old. And you know what worked last time? I'm straddling that chin and going straight for the nose.
Yeah. Let's go.
Woo, woo, woo, woo. Shush.

Nine plus four.

13 that hits. Good old damage.
Hell yeah.

All right, damage time, baby.

Five plus twelve plus eleven.

17, 28 points of damage.

Nice, ice.

Heavy hit. Whack.
His nose kind of like densens a little bit. The eyes kind of.

It's getting furious.

The color of its pupils is getting brighter. I don't know.
I'm like staring at it right in the face. I'm like, haha, okay.

Your hair's kind of like starting to stand up a little bit.

Yep.

Perfect reference.

And I do a cool backflip off of his chin. Super ball.

Back in your place. Perfect.
Finishing your go. Pips, you're up.
Okay.

Flaming arrow. Flaming arrow.
Flaming arrow. Ooh, I don't think I got it.

11.

11 hits. Oh, it's evangelical.
It's hard to hit. It's okay.
Okay. So.

Are you using magic? Let me know. I am.
Okay, I'm stepping back. All right.
We got a six. Great.
We got a four. Ten.
We got a three.

Thirteen.

We got a one. Fourteen.

We got a two.

Sorry, and we got a one.

17. Plus eight.

Yes. So 25 points of damage.
Oh, a heavy, fiery hit that it cannot defend against.

As the fiery arrows like shh arc into it and blast as it does, one of the eyes kind of closes up, and the other eye gets even brighter angrily as this one's like darkened and pulled inward, burned and closed.

Ew, yeah. Well done.
That's nasty. Finishing you go, Grimmek's up.
Grimmick hates moon creatures. They terrorized him.
He's gonna try to attack with the axe.

18.

18. 18 hits.

Let's go.

five

uh

so the six so eleven plus six seventeen seventeen points of damage

with the axe finishes coming to go top of the round barnaby you're up oh sick um

i'll throw my boomerang at it let's go

okay uh 13 13 hits oh check okay cool um and teddy you're up

oh yeah i'm ready plus i did two great

19 damage. 19 damage.
Nice.

And then I'll roll for the damage for myself, and I'll take two

out of 52. Oh, yeah.
I was like, why do you keep doing that?

Oh, it's because the last moon cursed my boomerang. Yeah, sorry about that.

Alright, finishing your go, Teddy. You're up.

Alright.

This thing's looking kind of rough. I see the chin's kind of going.
I'm just gonna run, and I'm just gonna do that just giant jumping fist right up in that chin.

Sure, you can.

Well done.

That's a 15-4, so that's 19, and it's also in a crit. It is! Let's go! Roll that crit damage, baby! Come on, real high.

Ooh! Okay, so that's

10, 15,

23 times 2.

46. 46.
Oh my gosh. I'm about to start paying for this guy's gym.

You punch the chin off. You just fall on

and you watch as this like blast of energy as Teddy just like lifts in the air. There's like an arc of power off the fists.

And where the chin was, you just see like this broken edge and the piece of it is glowing and like

ricocheting and just being fired off down the hallway.

Like lands into the water and shh, the disabled chin is being carried out of the oh man. I wanted that.
You can find it later.

That finishes your go, Teddy.

Mr. Venus is very unhappy and is going to go ahead and crescent storm everybody present in this room.
Crescent Storm.

That's going to be a 10 to hit. Oh,

okay. Not me.

That doesn't get anybody? No, I'm 11. You can get Gremek.
I get Gremek. Gremek Dog.

Gremek, Dunk!

Gremek takes 16 points of magic damage.

His magic defense is kind of decent. Alrighty, finishing Mr.
Venus's go. That brings us to Mabel.

Hey, what's up? What's up, players?

Yo, I was pretty impressed by your Shory Yukin, so you know what? I'm going to do that. Sure, you can.
Here we go, baby. I'm going to swing and do a little uppercut action.
13 plus 4. That'll hit.

Roll damage.

One and three.

Nice.

And an 11. So we got 15.
15 points of damage. How do you want to do that?

Once again.

That's the second less in that one.

I don't know. I did the same thing last time.
I'm kind of going for it. But you know what? I'm going to go straight.

I'm going to go whoosh and then go straight for the nose and like just like crunch it in, you know? So like the whole thing folds, right?

So you smack it once, kind of knock it up in the air a little bit, and then leap up to catch it there. And then full on

you watch watch as like it's one swollen blackened eye, the other one staring at you.

So that glow of energy is about to like moonbeam blast you right in point blank, point blank range begins to build up as the hammer swoops in, the face just caves in and you hear.

Eat this.

Grandma goes, ah, a good one.

Thanks, Grandma!

As the face is like carved in and your hammer's stuck in it, and it's kind of holding you there and and you're kind of hanging from the hammer, the face

spider cracks before

bursting into hundreds of pieces, and you plummet and catch yourself and catch your hammer in the way. Yeah.
Finishing that battle. Oh, cool as well.

All right. Here's your chance.
Say something cool. Say something cool.
Yeah, just go for it.

Come on.

Sam.

Yeah! Writing that one down.

Amazing. Thanks, y'all.

While that's happening,

Zusari.

So what do I see while I'm up here? So you set up this mechanism. It's a massive like stone clockwork contraption.
There are levers and turning stones there.

As you look at it, go ahead and roll D20 and add your magic.

Nat 20.

Oh!

Yeah. I don't have any magic.
But Nat 20.

Well, sure.

You...

Like, you're worldly. You've traveled a little bit, whether by choice or by force.
And you've interfaced with people of different disciplines. But there's one thing that's always

kind of enthralled you, is the creation of clockwork. And the idea of

not everyone who's trained and great, you know, runic magics can create things that can last and things that seem like magic, how they move.

And whether it be watchmakers, clockmakers, you've always kind of had an interest in seeing people do this craft.

And as you watch kind of the patterns of it shifting, you realize like, oh, okay, these are how these things are moving.

And if this piece were to be jammed and then turned the opposite direction, it would shut off the gate.

And with that, you take one of your tanfas and jam it in there and kind of break it at the right angle where the uh the rest of the wheel kind of gets loose and begins to spin rapidly as it does.

The gate

closes, shutting off the source of water.

And that entire basin now just slowly diminishes until it is traversable. Wait, wait, wait, I'm thirsty as hell.
Hold on, hold on, hold on.

Hey, Pips, you can finally get you. You found it.
You can get into that little alcove. Well, we should probably see what else is here now that there's no more water.

Yeah, but you can get into that alcove while we're here. Okay.
I'm going to go over the alcove and just kind of like

over where? Peek it. Oh, behind the waterfall.
Oh, behind the waterfall.

You glance in there and you can see that there is a

hanging on a chain a small object. It's a crest of a three-pointed star.

That could have been used to open the door that was there.

But there is also what looks to be a small bundle wrapped in cloth.

Okay.

I'll go in there and get both of those items.

Okay.

You grab the chain with the item in, you grab the bundle, and you realize, oh, it's not a bundle of cloth, it's an actual robe.

And you gain a guard robe. Nice.

Is that magic defense?

Yes, plus four defense plus two to magic. Holy moly.

Not magic defense, plus two to magic. Oh,

it helps the casting of magic. Yeah.

Yeah, that's perfect for you. Dang.

Okay. Good find.
Good find. Hey, I found the key thing for the door.
Oh, wait a minute.

Should we just go? I mean, like, let's open it because there could be something quicker. No, no, no, no.
We don't need to. Because I want it.
So.

Oh, you want to keep it all around?

Jeuce, you're like still up there, so why don't you just go down the stairs and check out what's in that room? We have access to it. Can I do that? Yeah.
Okay, I'm just gonna go look in the room.

Head on down. There's a small chest in the corner over here.
Oh, so cheap.

I have a little bit of trauma with chests, but I'm gonna open it anyway.

You guys can open the door if something bad happens.

Yes.

I attempt to open the chest. Okay.
You open the chest and kind of kick it open. I need you to roll it.
No, I need to. Oh, okay.

Here we go. And you can use it over and over again, and it never gets old for me.
It's old for all of you, but not for me.

You get two medicine out of that chest. Nice.
Oh, yeah. Cool.

As well as

a small scroll of runic magic.

So, what'd you get in there, Zeus? There's medicine in here, and

out of consideration for you, I won't tell you what else is in here. Oh, it's magic related.

Maybe.

Magic doesn't like you. I don't understand what.
Yeah, we have a very toxic relationship going on.

Schrödinger's irritation. Just go with it.
Is there anything else I can see in this room?

No, it's mostly an open chamber that just kind of leads to that doorway where you had to more or less circumvent it. Right.
Hop on over there. Okay, yeah.

So we definitely join my friends. You hop down the rest.
We don't need that star thing anymore, so could I have it?

I mean, I don't see why not, but let's just hold on to it just in case. Yeah.

I mean, I'll hold on to it. Okay, here.
Awesome. Hey, do you have any kind of like string or something? Oh, absolutely.
You want to wear it around your neck?

It's actually got a chain on it. So you could.
It does? Yeah, yeah. Oh, this is so.

They're so accessorized.

It actually kind of works. It's pretty awesome.

I'm not going to lie.

Oh,

did the moon drop anything, by the way?

I forgot. The moon and the cards, did they drop anything? We'll get to that in a second.
Hang on a minute. All right, Grammy.
You're kind of pushing your luck right now.

Just being honest.

All right. A good friend is usually honest.
Yeah. yeah, yeah, yeah.

I mean, it's just

a bunch of portion of your body.

Yeah, another thousand potch from the Mr. Venus, and somebody roll a d20 for me.
A thousand? Which is in 166 a piece. Twelve.
That's right. Twelve? Okay, that's all you find.
There's 166 apiece.

750.

Yep. Okay.
Who's rolling the D20? I already rolled it. Oh, all right.

We didn't find it. Alright.
Sorry. Let's make our way

over to

over there, I guess.

Now that there's no water.

We might be able to just go straight into that room then. Yeah, yeah.
We should at least take a look. Instead of, I mean, maybe just go down this

way. We want to go down this rushing out, we could go that way.
Did you want to? I think so. I want to kind of see.
Yeah, just kind of sneak up in there. Yeah.

It's going to reveal into this chamber. Hey!

And two.

Where water was also dropping from above. You can see there's like an entryway where another like part of the sluice system was kind of

dropping down into here and causing the water to rush out, but it also has been cut off from turning off that machine.

And now, as you enter into this chamber, there are two chests to each side, and it continues onward into a long, beautiful hall with like an arched top. Let's check out those chests.

Hey, Gremic, why don't you go over and open one of those chests, buddy?

Okay,

walks over, opens the chest. Someone rolled your 20 and

X decks.

17, 18, 19. 19? Grammy goes,

jumps out of the way.

This little like beam of red energy, like

and just detonates, creates like a localized explosion that shatters the chest and probably would have done a lot of damage to anybody in the immediate vicinity of the chest.

As the pieces of wood scatter and you all kind of protect your eyes for a second, nothing is left in the place of the chest.

Wow, good job, Grammy.

That was cool. And you're still wearing that?

You, what the hell?

I kind of like, I gotta like pull my robe.

Oh, man, it's cool, though.

Thank you. Thank you.
I kind of pulled my robe back. Thanks.
You can pull it up. Don't be ashamed.
You want it back.

There's still another chest, though.

Hey, Gremen.

What are you doing right now?

All right. What? Why don't you go open that other chest, man? Surely there's not another one.

I'll give you a high five.

Yeah, yeah, nice.

Kicks on my other chest. Roll a d20.
Coming six.

Wow.

Six opera as six. Six.

Heels across my face.

Oh boy. Current kicks his own button, like looking back at you and puts a thumbs up, like in slow motion, is like, no.

Right as they're swimming.

No!

This white flash, and it's like the pull on anime, you see like the shadow of Gremek as white fills with screen. Like we're talking about like Neo-Tokyo, you know, Akira explosion.

Gremek takes 35 points of matching damage. God

he's still alive.

After the ring in your ears subsides,

you all look over and Gremek is standing there still with the thumbs up, but it's just smoldering and smoking. All of his fur is just singed dark, and it's like,

yo, Gremek, is there any treasure over there?

Looks over, and there's just like the ground is just a scarred black eyes.

No.

Man, Gremek's cool as hell.

I walk over to poor Kremek and I'm like, here, Gremik, you deserve this. I give him a medicine.

Please drink.

And it's weird.

He just slowly tones the medicine over the period of 30 seconds.

It's like weird.

I don't know what that's triggering or something.

But he does heal 50 hit points. Oh, that's great.
Hey, great job, Gremi. That's what I'm here for.

Pops up a spatter of blood.

Oh, that's internal. That's internal.

Let's go check that last room. Yeah, let's go check that out.

Over where? Here or this way? Yeah, like around the room.

We're just going to look inside.

This door is indeed locked and latched.

Is there anything looking through it? Does it seem like there's anything? Well, D20. All right.

A four.

A four.

Best you can tell, looks empty.

What? The room? Yeah. I don't see the bars on the inside.
Yeah.

You do see a mile, like one chest across the way. No.

Alright, here I go. Wish me luck.
I'm walking away.

Roll strang.

15 and I guess. Plus three.
Plus three, yeah.

The door

caves in a bit. It doesn't quite break fully.
You just kind of put your foot up and push. And it...

Nice.

Just cliding outwards. That is nice.
Oh, and it counts.

It's yours.

Aww.

Hey, Greb it.

No, no, no, no, no.

What? What?

Are you not going to medicine? Are you not going to?

Three. Oh, Barnaby, what do you do? Two.
Oh, wonderful. No mind if I do.
I have a... I have a...

I found this branch one time and it opens chests really well. And I will, yeah, I guess I'll try to poke it open with

something.

The lid kind of

opens up.

There's just a small little platform there that has

looks like a rolled-up piece of ancient parchment to present to you. A firewall scroll.
Whoa!

Very cool. What is that? Oh, no, get that shit away.
Yeah, I'm so sorry. This is

bizarre. I've never seen a scroll that does some kind of little magic.
That's in.

Okay.

I've only seen scrolls that teach me how to read the scrolls. Those are all the same scrolls.

Well, why don't you read that scroll?

Oh, it's only for that applicable scroll. Oh, I got it.

That's what I, yeah. Got it.
It's the Rosetta zone for one thing. Yes, yes.

It is up for sale. You must be quite the linguist.

Well, I did a while back through the.

I think it's... I want to see what's in the fancy room.
Yeah, me too. Let's go see what's in the fancy room.
There's a fancy room. We were heading towards it.

But what's going on with this right here? What's going on with this?

Because we came from here, right? Right. So this actually was a little bit of a game.
Oh, okay. Got it.
That I didn't have room for it to put the things on.

Yeah, that's fine. So you return to this chamber? That's

a good thing. Brilliant.
Should have had somebody. So

you head down this long arched hallway for probably a good 50, 60 feet or so before it opens up into a beautiful, massive chamber.

You can see in the back wall is a heavy set of stairs that raises to an upper platform, and there are pillars that line the sides of it.

You see what looks to be

two statues that mark each side, one that looks like one of the robed figures with the hood kind of reaching outward towards the center.

On the other side you see a statue that looks like a big two-headed snake. It has like its heads curled up.
There is on the upper area above the platforms like a massive statue that looks like

a hulking Sindaran figure that has its arms up and its hands out like this. And down in the center of it there is this beautiful

almost like a like a

dried patch of wild-looking vine and withered flowers that sits upon a stone platform, like some sort of a

plant nursery or like a cultivated ancient flower garden that was built in the center of this chamber, like a massive indentation that's risen up, and where all of this old plant matter was raised to what was probably a very vibrant color.

And you can see amongst the withered browns and grays just enough shades of undercurrents of color that it looks like it probably was once extremely vibrant, but is now dried, brittle, and withered.

Whoa.

Do we have any water?

Well, we got rid of it, actually. Stop the water.
Oh, did we do this?

That would have been pretty quick. I know.
I mean,

I've met Dry or Blanche.

What do you do? I'll take a look at the flowers, I guess. I was going to do the same thing.

No, you go ahead and do it.

Yeah. Go ahead and roll a D20.
Add your luck.

10. 10? Okay.

Looking through the space, like you kind of touch a bit pieces and parts of it, when you touch it, it crumbles away into dust.

Other parts kind of move, but it's easy to also move some of the vines aside as you do, and they kind of fall away. And it just, this is very old, but this was an this chamber was important.

And the way it's built, and everything's kind of driven towards the center here, this looks like it is a

prominent piece, part of the things, one of the things that possibly could be at the core of a temple, you're uncertain.

But looking through, there is one little bud.

one soft, faint little, kind of faintly pinkish bud that has the only real touch of color amongst all the rest of this.

Can I pluck it? You can. You pull it, and it takes a slight tug, but

this little budding herb that has like a flowered part that's still kind of enclosed is now at your disposal. Oh,

thank you. Nice.

Wonderful. You know, hold it it aloft, and you can sense this has like some unique healing properties to it, likely.
I noticed the bud is, uh, you know, I'm assuming it's pretty Sundarian.

Um, and I take it and I lick a pip

and I give it to her.

And I, since she's an an elf, and I know that's there's a connection there. That's why I take it and I and I give it to her.
So

yeah. Are you sure? Positive.
It's probably better used for you, someone who's probably connected to this place than I.

This is so beautiful. Thank you.
Of course.

Uh-oh. The chamber shifts with a heavy impact, and you watch as big clouds of dust

fall from the ceiling. As you watch, like the massive stone entity on the upper stairs, its foot has shifted forward.

Its hands

rest low as modicums of dust

fall and drift down in clouds of ancient, forgotten elements.

And it

makes the charge toward your trumpet as the ruined guardian has been awakened. Let's go ahead and get that ready.
Okay, well, you weren't taking good care of it.

That was not what you wanted from us. Yeah.

What's everyone's max HP?

80. Yeah.

Oh, big stone guy. Oh, boy.
Oh, boy. Okay.

What's your max hit points? My max is 75.

But I'm currently not there. Where am I? All right, everyone, roll.
B20 at your speed. Alright.

Alright 25 to 20.

20 to 15.

Oh boy. Oh boy.

15 to 10. 10.

Really? Okay. Really? Oh boy.
How exciting.

Okay.

All right, so you have Teddy?

I guess I'm going to be using the scroll on myself because everyone else is definitely going to be

10 to five.

Six. Nine.

Okay. So.

So wait. Wait, nine.
What'd you get? Five. Five, you got six? Uh, yeah, four.
Yeah, six. Okay.
Wait, so it's Ted, Pips,

Barnaby, Barnaby.

Me.

What did you get?

I don't want to talk about it.

Sorry. I got a one.
You got a one. And then, oh, wait.
Wait, don't you add a thing? What did Grimmick get? I don't have speed. Oh, Grimic.

And maybe. Oh, where is his speed?

15.

Okay.

Grammek goes before most of you.

Oh, Grammic's cool here, isn't it?

He did hear me.

Wait, so I have a question, Matt. Yes? So this guard robe, can I put it on? Yeah, you can put it on.
Okay, so then... So that adds, so your magic becomes a plus six.
You can just mark that there.

Got it, okay.

And you get one more use of both of your spells. Oh, cool.

And then this says plus four defense, so would I add that to

yeah, and your and your what armor do you have right now? I have uh what's the bonus of your body armor? The bonus of your body armor you have currently. Oh, bonus of my body armor.

Um oh, the leather coat would be plus three, so that gives it up to a plus four. So your defense would become an 11.
Okay.

Shall we? Alrighty, so.

As all of you stand there kind of watching as the Guardian comes towering and rushing towards all of you, it goes first because everyone rolled really bad.

It's going to begin with a seismic swing. It's going to go ahead and swing and attack everybody in the front row.
Oh, boy. That's going to be a 17 to hit.
Oh, boy. All three of you in the front row.

Yep. All right.
You all take

38 points of physical damage. Oh, my goodness.
That's a nice.

And you are all, as as it slams its fist, the sheer

immensity of its power causes a shock wave to blast you all back, and everyone switches rows. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, that's not good.
Oh, I can't attack.

Okay.

Hey, Dozy-Doe, I'm alright. Hey, let's go.

Wow, ow. And that finishes the Runes Guardian's turn.
So, bringing us back to Barnaby. Oh, you can play Gremic, my house.
Oh.

I go? Wait, no, it's Grimm. Oh, sorry, no, Grimmick, I read that wrong.
Oh, sorry, my bad. No, you're Grimmek, goes away.
Gramek's gonna go. Grimek cannot attack from the back row.
Yes.

Oh,

Gremek has an axe, which is. So Grimmek would have to either defend or use an item or use the shift ability to change positions with somebody in the front row.

I'm going to.

You know what? Let's do.

let's do defense

I would I would recommend shift shift shift yeah just because we're gonna have to flip let's shift

what's the lowest physical defense then out of us three in the field also whoever has like distance attacks also so you might want to actually you should the two of you should flip I think or because you have the ball either of the two Barnaby what's your physical because like I like if he attacks

my physical defense is 12 so maybe if yours is lower than that maybe you should switch but I don't know what it is with the rogue.

Let's switch with Barnaby.

Okay, wonderful. Yeah, let's switch.

All right, with that, Barnaby, you shift back to the front, and Gremic is the front.

All right, that finishes your go there.

Greming is done. Teddy, you're up.
I'm gonna use an item. I know I should switch, but I'm going to use the Clay Guardian scroll.
Okay. Ow.

So my defense is now 14. Oh, nice.

Okay. Cool.
Yeah. Hey, fight one guardian with another guardian.

That's crazy. So, because ow.

But yeah,

that's all I got. Will you use the scroll? You only get that one use? How are you? Yeah.
Pretty bad. 42.

All right. Scrolls, scrolls, unless they have multiple dots, they're just one use only.
All right, finishing your go there, Tay? Pips, you're up. Oh, with Barbie on deck.
My goodness.

All right, so I am going to take a shot and I'm going to try to do

a firewall.

Okay,

let's go.

That's just going to make it harder, right?

Well,

you're smelting it. Yeah.

Nine.

Nine, unfortunately, just misses. So you do half damage on that.
Oh, I do have. Okay.

So, um, so that's

96 plus eight. So

one,

3.

1. 9.
5.

6.

11.

2.

13.

5.

18.

1.

19.

4.

23.

1. 25.
24.

6. 30.

And 2.

32. Plus 8.
8. 40 points of damage.
Reduced. That's 20 points of magic damage.

Okay, first damage taken by the runes cardio a firewall engulfs the front of it as it burns you see it like kind of pushes through but nevertheless the the stone heats up you can see the edges between where the various pieces of rock kind of formulate the statue themselves kind of crack slightly it is taking damage so okay okay all right okay that finishes your turn

uh at the end of your turn pips barnaby you're up uh

you look like you're gonna go down soon i'm i'm okay i'm okay at the moment i'm gonna hold off just for a little bit i will throw my boomerang at it.

Let's go.

Not one. One rule.
Okay.

Oh, boy.

Not one. I go, the power is just too much for me right now.
Oh, great. I take eight damage from that.
Oh, no. Oh,

moly.

The Ruins Guardian, unfortunately, has reach with its massive fists, so it is going to counter-attack from the back row.

So it is going to go ahead and attack you. That is going to be a 21 to hit you.
Oh, my God. That just about does it.

That just about does it. All right.
right, you take

38 points of physical damage

as its fist just moves between Grimmicks.

And sorry.

You said 32? Yeah. Okay, cool.

38.

38.

Oh, okay. Okay.

Sheesh!

Yeah, that's what he said.

So that finishes Barnaby's turn. So sorry, you're up.

We've made a undecked. Would you like to shift? Kind of shift.

I need to, yeah. Yes.

I shift with... Is that my entire turn? That would be your action, yeah.

Worth it. Yeah.

Alrighty. Finishing Zesari's.
Go to shift to get you in the front row. Mabel, you're up.
Oh, I got to smack it. I got to smack it real good.
I'm going to try to smack it like in the, you know,

the inner knee. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Trying to kind of like knock out balance, you know what I mean? Totally, totally. Go for it.
Let's go to roll and attack on that.

No.

One. No!

Not touching.

I'm going to roll with a different one.

So you go.

And then the guardian did you roll all the ones.

You go ahead and swing, and it hits the side of its knee, and the knee does not budge. The hammer just goes like,

or like the wobble goes through your vinyl part too.

And as you kind of gather yourself, you look up, just as it brings his one fist up to counter-attack you from above. that's going to be a 22 to hit.

Yeah, it just hits.

I think that way it was. Why is it I can roll high on doors?

27 points of physical damage to you. All right.
17. Whoa! Massive crushing blow from above.

All right. I'm really hurting.
All right, that finishes your go back to the top of the round. Now it's the Ruin Guardian's turn.
Yeah. Let's see if it regains

its seismic swing on a four plus it does. It regains its seismic swing.

Oh no.

It is going. I think I'll miss you.

You're also with me. However, it's going to use its shockwave ability.
It's going to do plus four to all in a column.

Since you emitted the firewall on it, it's going to go ahead and bring its hands back and

like Hulk slam its both hands together to go towards both of you in that column right there for both

pips and Zusari.

It's going to be an 11. Does 11 hit either of you? No.
Just hits. It just hits you.
So it misses Zusari, but it hits you. The shockwave blasts into you.
You take...

No!

30 points of magical damage. Okay.

And you are silenced.

The rune within you, your fire rune, suddenly goes quiet. And as you try and shout, nothing comes out, and you lose the ability to use it.
So 30? 30 points. Okay, so minus six.

I'm going to connotate you as silence with this. No.
Is there a way to do that? Pips, are you alright? I can get I can fix it. I've done it before.
I can fix it. But I need to fix myself first.

Have I large gashes?

It'll take just about a moment.

Just a little bit. Just a moment.

Alrighty. Okay, Grimmick's turn.
Indeed, Grimmick from Teddy. Where'd I put the...
Alright, Grimmick, show us what you got. Grimmick.
Grimmick's turned!

Shit! No, no way.

Five. Five misses.

What are you rolling the dice? Three. Three is within the Ruin Guardian's counter.
Oh my god.

This is real rough, y'all.

Oh, really bad. The Guardian rolls a nine to hit Grimmick.
What's his evasion? Nine. Nine.
Just hits him.

So dark.

Oh,

no. Oh, Grimmick.
Grimmick takes 38 points of physical damage.

Alright. So you just like double double hand over.

Just slams. Grummy just kind of goes like

flattens out the shield above. The guardian's like fists are still in the ground before it like

dislodges them like bits of rock and stone falling. Grummy can kind of like

pick up the shield and the axe and kind of just looks back at you.

I'm sorry, I'm getting scrolled.

It's okay. I forgot Grab you anyway.

You said 30. Do I use that was magic defense or defense? No, regular defense.
Regular defense. Okay, so I could do.
So it's 30?

That would be 30, yeah. Okay.
Alright, that finishes. Grummex go.
Teddy, you're up with Pips on deck.

I actually have to flip with Pips because I can't do anything where I am. So we're flipping.
Alright.

You get back there. It'll be fine.

Oh, boy.

That's my turn. The elf row.

Alrighty, finishing your turn. Pips, you're up with Barnaby on deck.
Oh, shit. Okay.
Alright, so.

Remet is at 47. Oh, my God.
Okay. Oh,

okay. I'm silenced.
I can't use rune magic, so I'm just gonna... I'm just gonna take a shot with my bow.

Alrighty, go for it. Roll for an attack.
Okay.

I don't think that's going to work.

No way.

Wow. It's seven to hit? Yeah.
That misses. What did you roll in the dice? I rolled

a three. Oh my gosh.

We are so... This is fucked up.
The moon's guardian. That's so bad.
It's crit ranges in a one to three. Or sorry, it's counter ranges in one to three.
So you rolled a three. That is a counterattack.

So as you release the arrow, you pull back.

Right as the guardian, like sees it happening, you fire the arrow and it swats it out of the air and brings its hand down just to slam and crush you open palm on the ground.

That's going to be

12 to hit. Why did I take a shot? Why did I hit myself?

What did you say? 12 to hit? 12 to hit hit. As the hand coming down.
Why did I hit myself?

Why did I do this? Why was this a choice?

Okay, not a great damage roll for him.

22 points of physical damage against you? Okay, great point. Okay, you have that.
That was a bad damage. Wait, you said, I'm so sorry.
22 points of physical damage. Physical.
Physical.

Okay, so that was 22, you said? Correct. Great.
Okay. As you just kind of like, wham, open palm crushes you onto the ground.

You like, get pulled underneath the hand eventually removes itself and you like stick to it for a second and then kind of peel off and drop

slaughtered demolished out of his turn. All right finishing pipes turn Barnaby you're up with the Zusari on deck.

As much as I'd like to help everyone else here I cannot go down or else I can't heal no or heal anybody.

So I will I will once again pull out this long slab sewn slab that is like painted white, looks very intricate, intricately detailed.

We found this in some kind of ceremony, I was like, don't ask. And then I'll turn it around and face it as myself as I get blasted by a strong yellow light.

And I will use my healing wind and I will heal to full HP from 18. There you go, bro.
Awesome. 18.
Yeah. Oh, gosh.
Yeah, you needed that.

You do what you need. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Cool. Hell yeah.
I don't care how dead I am. Don't use it on me, okay?

All right, I'll use the rag.

Your favorite rag.

Hate the rag.

I'm slowly gaining it.

Not the rag.

No, no.

No.

All right, Jasari, you're up.

I also use one of my medicines to heal myself.

All right, heal you 50. To full health.
Hell yeah. All right, Jasari's done.
Migo, you're up. All right, mother effer.
I just like see everybody getting beat up. And I go.

Not in response. Not in response.
That's fair. That's fair.
I'm going to go for his knee again. Here we go.
Come on.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Seven. You're a heavy hero.

But what did you roll? A three. Oh, God.

This is so funny.

Okay. I'm going to roll this above the table.
Yeah. Because now we're getting to that fun point.

All right. That is going to be a 12 to hit you.
Oh, yeah. I'm 13.
13 and missed you.

Oh, man.

So it's a plus six to hit. So that's that was like full on.
This time, as you like, go forward and you're like, I got this.

And you just, the fear of the last impact hits you, and you kind of falter a little bit. And right as you look at and see the shadow coming towards you, you leap back just in time as the fist

hits the ground,

cracking the stonework and leaving this massive indent kind of crater in the middle of the temple floor. All right, that finishes your turn.
Top of the round, Rune Guardian's turn. Yep, yep.

Let's see if it gets its its shockwave back.

It does not. Oh, thank you goodness.

It has a seismic swing, but instead it's going to use its one-a-day special. It's going to use toxic fog.
Of course,

it inhales

and exhausts from inside of its stone mouth this like dark, brackish, purple-brown fog that kind of sort of fills out the entire space there.

That is going to be

10? Does 10 hit anyone? No, not me. No.
Oh, well, he hits Greme. Grimmick.
Gremek. No!

Does 10 hit you? No. No.
Oh, man. Wow, he rolled really bad on that one.
Alright, so Gremek is poisoned. Gremek! Oh, thank you.
Poisoned is so bad.

He sees damage. Okay.

Do you want to take over for Grimmick now? Sure.

And Gremek. Gremek takes eight points of magic damage from the fog.
But there's now poison. Okay.
So he doesn't take any because his magic defense sounds right.

Grimmick, how do you feel?

Oh boy.

Oh, Grimmick's cool as hell.

You got an antidote, right? I do.

But you need to use your runes, right?

I

mean, I can do more damage with the runes. Yeah, but I mean, I guess

Gremic is up, by the way. Oh, yes.
Okay, great.

Grimmick immediately takes 2d6. It takes 2d6 points magic damage.

No, of physical damage.

Or does he just straight take it? No, it's 26 damage, but he ignores physical damage.

So he takes the full thing? Yeah. Okay, cool.
He'll take six. Go down to 41.
Oh, he's fine. Yeah.

That's fine. That's another.
I mean, well, you know. Don't die.
Don't die.

Cool. I assume he just wants to swing at this thing, so we'll go ahead and roll that.
It should do some damage to this thing. Yeah,

I hit it, maybe. Oh, nice.
Okay, cool.

17. 17 hits.

Look at that. Grab it!

Grab it!

We got another hit!

Cool.

Oh my god, this has just been.

Yeah, wow, it's been rough. Roll damage.

13 damage. 13 damage.

Grimek strikes it with a heavy ass.

It scrapes it and does a little bit of damage, but this is a hardy entity. And its defense is high enough to the point where you have to do a lot of damage at once because it is a high defense.

It is a stone guardian. So Grimek, even with a heavy hit with his axe, it kind of barely cuts through its stone.

Finishing Grimex go. Teddy, you're up.
How are you guys on health? I'm baffled. I just want to

how are you on health? I'm at 31, but I can, I can, I can

take I can take some

something. Yeah, I can take something.

I was wondering if you guys wanted to try the oh, I want to try it. You want to try the whirling? Absolutely.
I want to try whirling fury. Yeah.

Okay, so I'll take my attack and then you guys are going to do whirling fury. Alright, so I'm taking just a straight shot to see what I can do here because I have waited for this.

I'm going to go and try and just get my fingers in its throat. Not 20.
Yes!

Let's go! Just going for the throat hit right there. All right.
That's going to hurt your hands. That's worth it.
These strong hands.

My hands are strong. All right.
That's

24 times two. What I said, 48.

Heavy. The hit.
Even with its defense, you break through with the heavy impact as you like jump off its knee, off its shoulder, and then just

impact it right in the throat.

The stone cracks inward, and you watch his chunks kind of

fall free.

Backflip back. You backflip back as the headcount shifts down in your direction, and the hands try to reach for you, and just go wide as you land, flipping back,

landing on your feet right in the front, ready to go. We do take damage at the drawback.
So I don't know if you want to risk that or not. Just letting you know.
I run up and grab the stone.

Oh, yeah, you're right. I'll throw it.

Hey, you want one?

It's one of the stones that fell off the bank. Oh, absolutely pick knife.

I put it in my pocket. Hell yeah.

All enemies take 3d8 plus double your combined strength stats. Takes all of our 3d8s combined.

Sorry, this is for Whirling Fury. Whirling Fury.

Whirling Fury.

Because I'm at 31. I don't know if those are smart.
Right. Yeah, so it's not based on weapons.

All enemies take 3d8.

Plus double your combined strength stats. So the idea is that you'd add all your strengths together and then double that on top of whatever the 3d8 is.
Gotcha.

So it's more useful for like multiple enemies and groups, but single targets, it's debatable. But also, you get to, you know,

all roll and see if y'all have them. So, up to you.
Y'all take the highest roll.

We can hold off. If you want to.
How about it's cool? It's cool, but it's like

we take damage at the end. Yeah, it's cool, and you all get to choose the highest of the attack roll.
So it's like... It's a light.
It's a better chance of it being successful. Up to you.

It's up to you. Let me try it.

Let's try it. Let's try it.
We haven't tried it yet. Let's do it.
Let's do it. Let's go.
Oh, boy. All right.
So, I'll have you all roll an attack roll against the Guardian.

And the highest among you will use?

Ooh. Six.
17. Nice.

We are adding. What do we add to it? Magic?

Accuracy. Accuracy.
Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. 18.
Oh, yeah, it's 10. Alright, great, yeah.
So that hits. Nice.
So someone roll 3d8, and what's your strength modifier?

My strength modifier is 1. 1.
What's your strength modifier?

Two. Two is 3.
Also 2. Two is 5, so 10.
So So roll three to eight plus ten damage. Just one of us? Yeah.
That all of you do together. Yes.

3d8. Sorry, 3d8.
3d8. Okay.

Nine. So

not the best roll, but. No, that's okay.
But, however, it does still break past his defense, and he does take a heavy impact. Describe how the three of you do your combined attack.

19. Zusari, I don't know if you saw earlier how.
I've been wanting to try the throw. I grabbed it

and then I was like, start running in a circle. Okay.

I was like,

the force of us to it.

Yeah. We start to hover.

Because we like that. We toss ourselves at him.

And just kicks.

Impacts kind of knocks back a little bit.

All the impacts kind of also loosens your shoulders a bit in a rough way, and you're all like, oh, that's going to feel real rough in the morning. I hate that.
But a heavy impact passed his defense.

And you all take a roll damage here on this.

You all take, oh, that's like three points of damage. Oh, nice.
That's fine. Not too bad.
All right. So that finishes your go.
Pips, Barnaby, and Zatari.

You're up, Mabel. Of course, I'm up.
It's Mabel time. Mabel time.

I'm going to do the same thing. I got to get this to work, man.
Yep. I'm going for that knee.
Here we go. I believe you.
Here we go.

18 plus four.

Yeah.

Nice.

That's it. That's a a crit.
Oh, that's a crit. Oh, nice.
Yes! Wool damage!

It's all coming back! Ah!

Ah! 10 and an 8 plus 11. Alright, so 18 plus 11, 29 times 2, 58 points of damage.

That's a heavy fucking hit.

I run up and I'm like, fuck this knee!

I'm just like, wham!

The kneecap just explodes outward and a massive stone about the size of your torso like,

rolls down the stairs and skids by and you're like, oh, if that hit somebody, it would have killed him.

But then he kind of like

falls onto one ground, and now he's still standing, but just on one knee. Oh, cool.
There we go. Bust of one leg and just bust it out.
Does that really change anything about him?

Oh, that's reducing his defense a little bit. I'll

yes.

Hey.

We're all working together, right? Yeah.

I softened it for you. We softened it for the bad.
We did. The bus saw.
So his defense is reduced a a little bit. That finishes your go, Mabel.
And now it's the rooms guardian's turn.

Yeah, it's going to seismic swing. Since seismic swing to all of you in the front row,

that's going to be a 21 to hit.

Wait, I'm in the back now? Yeah, you're in the back.

Are we going to switch positions? That is going to be 30 points of physical damage to Gremek, to Mabel, and to Teddy. Ooh.

And you all get knocked back into the bag. You're at five?

You got a heal. While you're back there, you should.

I don't have anything. Yo, you still got that rag? I do.
Oh, you seem very excited about it. No, I just need the health, is all.

Alright.

As you all get pushed back and shifted back in the position.

Wrangling your setup in a bad way. Finishing the rune guards.
Gremek is up. Gremek takes.

Oh, I'm Gremek.

Gremek takes five points of damage. Oh, no.
The poison. He's a 41 right now.

Wait, did he. What was the 30, the seismic?

Oh, yeah, 30 Fizz? 30 Fizz. That's

a 30 positional

23.

So,

because I don't think you mark the physical from the.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. So he's at 23 damage.
Oh, he's actually pretty messed up. He's at 13 hit points.

But he's pretty messed up now. He's pretty messed up.
Gremic, how do you feel?

Oh, man.

That's pretty bad.

All right, Gremek's going for an attack, I guess. Gremic cannot attack because Gremek's in the back row after being seismic slammed.

What's the... Oh, it's.
Oh, so you can flip. So that's the one thing Remic can do.
He actually

shift.

Yeah, I would definitely shift. Should he? Oh, because somebody's about to die? Well, also, he might be.
Our healer's in the front row right now. Oh, I see.
So I should switch with...

Gremic should switch with Pip or

Bartimek with me. Or with Bartomic.

Oh, okay. Barnaby, do that? Yeah, we can do that.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay.

Yes, we go.

Let me just say that or flip with me so I can attack.

Either way. Yeah.
All right, so that finished your grandma's go. Fuck.
Teddy, it's your go.

I'm changing my flip. All right, who are you flipping with? With Pips.
All right, you got it. Yep.

Let's go, Teddy. Back up front.
That's what I got. Okay.
There you go. Alrighty.

Finishing Yogo, Teddy. Pips, you're up.
All right, I'm going to take a shot with my bow. Let's go.
Yep.

Maybe I should heal myself. Oh,

I'm gonna take a shot with my bow.

You can also.

So you also have a United Tax if you want to. Don't forget you have that at your spoke.
Say again. United Tax.
Unite attacks. Oh, I just rolled.
That's cool.

You rolled a nine? Yeah. Okay.
A total's nine? A total. Total nine misses, unfortunately.

But he does not get a counter-attack on you, I don't believe, right? No, I rolled a five. Yeah, you're fine.
Okay, cool. So you fire the arrows, splinters across the chest, no major impact.

That finishes your go. Barnaby, you're up with a Susarian deck.
Alright, no worries, and I'll take out a rag and I'll ring it out and I'll... Oh, here it comes.
Oh.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Now I'm on ECS.

Awesome. I just started.

Oh, my gosh.

Yeah, dude. I requested a rag when I'm injured.

That seems

quite refreshing. How are you feeling right now?

I'm great. Okay.

There's a world

if you want to double up.

I'm completely open. Yeah, Yeah, we'll lose defense.

I'm okay with that. I'll take it.
I can take it. Are you okay?

I'm still in the high 40s.

Yeah, we can do it.

I'm next. 55.
Yeah.

Do we wait till.

No, if you initiate it, then I just lose my next term, which I'm fine with. Okay, yeah, let's do it.

I take the rag that I just took out of my mouth, and now it's only sopping with my spit, and I just like bunk it on the ground, and I'm like, yeah!

Fill that rag up, baby.

It just doesn't like make it ring. It just like doesn't even move, it just sticks.

Like right behind them, yeah. Yep, yep, yep.

I just

looking around.

Oh, God. All right, well, that finishes.
Barnaby's go, uh, Zusari, you're up for

it. We were gonna do our Unite.
I'm like, said, Say,

ready? Let's go for it. Alright, so this will take up your next turn.
Yeah. All right.
I roll four. Hopefully you rolled better.

11

if both hit. Alright, otherwise only damage with the damage.
If only one we get d6. So you rolled a four.
Oh,

a total of eight. Eight.
That does unfortunately miss. Eleven.
That does hit. Okay, so we get the d6.
Okay. So yeah, so otherwise only do damage for the weapon that hit plus two d6.

So I'm gonna roll for my attack. So while unfortunately you

the the impacts, everything around, hearing the shouting and the heavy sick thud of the wet rag on the ground kind of unsettles you and distracts you briefly, so your strength just go wide against the creature.

I'm sorry.

I got a little overexcited. I'll keep it together next time.

And collector's session.

13, 8, and 5. So that's 13.
That's 26 points of damage. Alright, got it.
Alright.

Not bad. Not bad.
Not bad.

All right, that finishes your go.

And that brings us to the Mabel's turn. Oh, hell yeah.
Let's go for the other knee, baby. Yeah, let's go.

18. Whoa! That's another crit.

Another crit.

All right,

that's gone.

That's what we need.

Oh, 10, 6, 11.

So, 16, 26, 52 points of damage.

It's that rag. It's all the rag.
Did that rag be so cute?

I do have more. I don't know if I have the rag.

All right, here I go. I do this like whoosh, and then like the power overwhelms me, and I'm like spinning and shit.
I'm like, yeah!

Crack! Other knee slams up from underneath and

it falls down. That's gonna reduce its defense even further.

Yes! Nice.

Doing work over here with the rag, with the rag.

Awesome.

That finishes your turn. That brings us back to the Ruins Guardian.
I can't attack. I wasn't back row.

Oh, no!

No! No!

No!

No!

No!

We'll save that for your next turn.

I'm going to hold that onto that. We'll come back to that.

Because that was an amazing turn. But for now, you're in the back row.
Do you want to switch? Yes.

I take it you want to switch with Zusari?

Is that kosher?

Kosher, but I think you should switch with...

No.

He's at 13. Grimic? Grimmick.
Up to you?

Yeah, I'll switch with Grimmick. Yeah, yeah.
Alright, Grimmick will. Isn't Grimic like dying? Uh, no, Grimmick's at 47 hit points.
Oh, no. Oh, no, he's at 13.
He's at 13.

You hang back, Gremek. I got you.
I got you, buddy. Okay.

Alright, so that swaps. Come.
We'll serve that awesome moment for their next turn.

Alright, bring it over to the top. It is now the Runes Guardian's turn.
It's going to go ahead and do a a massive front row swing. Well, no, it's gonna do it's gonna do back row.

Oh, oh, oh, oh, they can choose either.

I'm gonna roll this in front. This was my fault.

That's gonna be a 17 to hit. I did this.
Yeah. I did this.

You did. I did.

I did this.

I'm gonna roll this damage in front too. Oh, boy.
Oh, no!

Oh, that's rough.

That's rough. 37 points of physical damage to everybody in the back row.

37? 37. Oh, that's rough.
Gremek. Okay.

Yeah, no, Gremex. Gremix.
So, as he swings, you see it's going to go for the front row and it kind of arches forward. It's one broken knee.
It kind of leans over and just kind of

heavy arc swings it. Slams

into all three of you. Can I do like an emotional, like, last ditch to try to get the hand out of the way to save Gremek?

Uh

Because you just moved to the back row you I'll say you move up the hammer to do so, but it's not quite strong enough to resist it as the impact goes by the two other you see uh pips and Barnaby kind of stand

pulling back and you look over and meet your eyes, but you all notice that Mabel is not looking back at you.

Mabel is looking at the unconscious and bleeding body of Gremek that is just flat on the ground.

Now,

healing somebody while they're unconscious does nothing. You have they only recover after battle.

Unless you have a way of reviving an ally.

No!

Okay. I'm covered in Grimmick right now.

Oh, my God. My ears are ringing.
It's like black hooked down.

I get a fire in my eyes. Okay.

That finished the Runes Garnie's turns. Grimmick doesn't get a turn because Grimmick is unconscious and is out of the battle.
Teddy, you're up. I have to skip my turn because we used to be.

That's right, you used your thing last turn. I'm hips, you're up.
Barnaby on deck. Okay, I am at two hit points.
I am going to heal. Yes.
Take a healing potion

for 50 HP. I could also heal you, and then that way you can take an attack.
Oh, but I guess if you missed it, then something goes probably right.

I got it, I got it, I got it. Okay, so I am now at 52.

You got it. Okay.

Alrighty. Barnaby, you're up with the Zusari on deck.
Anybody else super messed up right now? I'm holding five. Okay, okay.
Yeah, I got one. I got one.
Okay. I can take one big.

I'm only emotionally messed up. Yeah.

It squeaks me.

Yeah, I will. Yeah, I will throw my boomerang at this guy.

Let's go.

Oh, my God. What the crazy.
Seven. I rolled a four.

I rolled a four. You're outside of the counter, right? I will still take the eight from it.
Dude, I take another eight. That's my guy.

This is absurd. Bad luck, y'all.

This is so crazy. My gloves have melted into my skin.
We'll talk about it later. No worries.

That's crazy. Pretty sure that's a shut flesh.

I didn't know there's no love left. Alright, finishing Barnaby's go.
That brings us to Zusari. Alright.

Let's get a hit, please.

Okay,

14. 14 hits.
Let's go.

Please, good damage roll. Good damage roll.

13. 13 damage.
Oh, wait, 13, 19, 13. 14, 13, 16.
17. 17 points of damage.
Alright, right, great.

So while still reduced by its defense, still a heavy hit that cracks through the stone, starting to show wear and tear,

the Guardian is starting to look damaged. You're impactfully, it has crossed a threshold of bloodied.
It is now, if it could bleed, it would be bloodied. It is about half health, I'd say.

Okay.

That finishes your turn. Mabel,

now, you awesome. Rush forward.

Earlier, while you were in the back row, you had this like vision of the future. This brief burst of the moment.
We're like, wait, that could be me. I'll do it right now.

For Kremic!

Rush up. Wham! Knock out its knee.
Critical hit. Boom.
48 damage. Reducing its defense.

It now falls on red second knee. It's almost like you had foresight.
You can see the future. Whoa.

That was like magic.

No, no, it wasn't. It was just my...

My love for Kermik is all. That's all it was.
My love for Kremic is just magical. Yeah.
Yes!

Yes! There it is.

All right. The Ruins Guardian is going to go ahead and shockwave

to this column here.

Wonderful. I'm going to roll this in front.
Which column?

The one I'm on? Yeah. That is going to be an eight to hit.
Oh, it's just not a hit.

The natural two. Oh, that means does anybody get a counter on that?

No. It's a two.
I count as two. That's a two.
He rolled a two. He rolled a two.
I counters four. Yeah, so both of you get a counter attack.
Oh, let's go.

He's gonna hit it.

That's 20. Mo!

That's what it's about. Matt 20.

Look.

I swear to you, it's not scripted. This is what this is crazy.

This is what should all be done. Yeah, I know, dude.

That's crazy.

Oh, my God. Be fair.
Just the balance roll once you guys roll your damage.

Which camera?

Yeah. All right.
Well, both of you guys roll your damage and then double it. Oh my gosh, you guys.
This is so cool. Dude, it's all from Gremek.
Yes, Ari, is there chance? He's completely. Yes, he is.

22. Times.
Is that including your plus?

That's the double. I had 11, 6, 7, 8, 10.
Oh, wait, no, it's not plus. Dude, I'm sorry.
6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15. So 30, actually.
30 points damage.

Y'all, I did 62 damage.

freaking go!

Yeah, that was, I rolled, all right, 12, 8, 20, 24, wait, 24 plus 7, which would be 31, so 62? Yes. Yeah.
62!

Oh my god!

Because y'all, Remick didn't need us. We needed Remy!

Holy shit! Wow. That's so good.
Wow. Holy fuck.
That is oh man.

Yeah, that swung things the other way a little, bro.

Okay, dang. Is he still up? Oh, yeah, he's still up.
Oh, shit. Oh, my God.
Okay.

That was his attempt. Wild.
All right.

Teddy, you're up. Yeah.

The guardian is not now like, like, on the... It doesn't have the feet up on the knees.
It's on the back knee after losing both knees. And it's like, I'm just going to spend my turn going.

No, okay, yeah.

Fuck, I'm going for it. Come on.
That's. uh, oh my god, that's a crit.
It's 50 points.

Yes. Gremig.

Oh my god. Okay.

I run over to Gremig's body and I take my star necklace off and I pull it out in my

fast.

Yes. I go in and I'm just and I just go like full running.
I'm trying to get to the dragon punch right to the chest, like right where the heart is, and that's 52 points of damage.

How do you like it? Yes!

Let's go, let's go. Yes!

Woof, woof, motherfucker.

You punch through and you watch as the back, outside the back of his shoulder,

just rocks go flying out the side as you pull your hand back. You see this massive hole in the Guardian's chest.
The guardian kind of like,

just starts tumbling and breaking off in pieces. The stones crumble and tumble.

And eventually, as it tries to lurch forward, its fists up, you washes its body before it can get the momentum to even strike back at you. Just crumbles apart and

fills the ground with shale and broken stone.

You're grounded. Hey!

Oh!

I am going to run over to Grime.

Me too. Perfect.

And

I was given this budding healing herb

from Zoom.

Yes. And it revives one ally to one HP.

So I'm going to go over and just scruff his little head

and just like open his mouth and just shove.

You've obviously fed a dogga pill.

Where you're like, no, no, no, no.

Closes it out.

Just swallow, just wall, just swell.

Hey, buddy!

Seize the pile of stone.

You got him! You got him!

Where treasure?

Oh.

Gremek, look down.

Gremek? Yes.

Treasure? For Gremek.

Gremek been treasure whole time

I mean I was talking about your necklace but

you've been the treasure the whole time Gremey was the treasure was you Gremek

Gremek has a lot to think about

Gremex

not wasted a lot of time

took a lot of time to learn treasure within yeah

Kind of clashes. Looks better on you, Bremen.
It really does. It does.
Yeah.

Right, as

the room shifts slightly, and you watch as the stone statue of the two-headed serpent

shifts slightly, and you hear in the distance something move. Something large.

And you hear

this heavy slithering sound from beyond the hall of where you are currently in.

There is no other exit to the chamber that you currently sit in, but the hall you came from, and that sound is coming from that direction. What do you do?

Uh

hey Gremick.

Yeah

how are you feeling right now, bud?

Grem is gonna see a little windy

for Greg. Give us some of that rag.

he's got Grimm. Give him a broken stone.
And there's the hallway you exited from. There's nothing else in this chamber.

Like, the central part of the chamber, really the part of this temple that it was protecting and gardening, was this garden in the center. And the one living piece from it, you removed.
And ate.

And then gave it to bring Grimmett back to life. So the treasure of this part of the temple was found.

and used.

And something is now shifting and slithering elsewhere in the temple, coming from the sound of your only exit.

What do you do?

We gotta make her run for it, I guess.

Okay,

let's do a mad dash, right?

I can always try to put it asleep. I think we gotta get out of here.
We have to leave. I think we should.

We going now, what do you think, Remick?

I think

I think Remick

has made new friends.

Let's go! Yeah!

You're my treasure!

We hear

this weird slithering, kind of hissing sound from beyond in response to your loud howling that draws tension to your area.

And you all just start running out through the hallway that you came from. You can see where the beginning of the aqueduct begins, where the water had been set out.
You all notice as you see a shadow

slither past the opposite side of that chamber where you had originally come through

something that fills this chamber

moves by

goes i'm scared

wait so there's something in the you all exit this area and you see some large black shadow just go

right there

okay what we're gonna do

turn around we're gonna break We're gonna break the dam that's holding the water back.

Yeah, and ride the water out? We're gonna ride the water out. Ride the water out.
Yeah, ride the water out. Yeah.

Ride the water out? We're gonna ride the water out. Okay,

can I try to like peek around this corner and try to shoot this to get it started? Well, we can, we can, I was gonna say we just because it's

it's uh okay, because it's just like a metal thing or the gate has fallen to close off the water. So we have to break it down.

You have to either break the gate or somehow get the machine to make it look good.

I mean, you can try and shoot if you think there's something on there. It's going to be a very hard shot, but it's possible.
Breaking the gate might be. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Break the gate. Sorry.

I didn't realize about the gate. That's all good.
Let's break the gate. Mabel.

Oh.

Oh, it's the gate, right? Yeah. Okay, I can just run up at the head of that.

Wait for the moment. Yeah, we're gonna time this.
Alright.

The shadow shifts by and hence this area. You have a closer look of it now as you're all like down in the basin.

It looks like a gargantuan serpent.

Something that's probably like a good 15 feet wide and is endlessly long, 60, 70, maybe 100 feet. And you swear for a second, you almost saw one, no, two heads

slither by as it vanishes this way. Whoa.
If we weren't about to die, I'd say that's cool as hell. Okay, wait for it to come back and once the tail goes by.

Once you hear it pass one more time, we're gonna make a run for it.

Fuck out of that. Yeah, okay.
Walk off, walk off.

Alright, I'm going. And I'm going with you.
Yeah, all right. You both just go charging down the base.

Yes!

Both of you roll strength checks for me. Come on.

12 plus 4. Nope, nope.
I rolled a one. No.

Oh, no.

Alright, so you go. Yeah, yeah.
You go in, like,

like your fingers kind of like

kind of crack and break backward. You slam into it once.

It cracks, but it's not enough. No!

You can try again if you want to. However, you hear in the distance a heavy impact echoes.

And again, I'm going to try again. We're going to try again.
Go for it. Both of you roll again.
Better.

19.

Plus three. 15.
Okay. You beat a 20? Yeah.

It impacts and breaks the water. Shh,

fills the basin, spreading by at an incredible speed.

Yep, the rest of you that are waiting on the side suddenly like

get picked up by the water as all of you now are being rushed in the rapids.

The massive two-headed serpent comes around the corner and sees you all rushing in the water. It is gonna

take three bites at those that come first. Since you were both the first two coming in there, who amongst you would be the first in the base? And I'll let you choose.
Should we roll for it?

Sure, you know what? Yeah, all three of you roll a d20, and then I'm gonna roll for Gremek.

13, 19, 17, 13, 13. You and Gremek, let's roll again.
Roll these, rollies,

two,

15. It's you.
Me.

Alright, so.

It's going to be a 14 to hit you. It hits.

You take.

35 points of physical damage. Ouch.

As it bites you. Yeah, yeah, I'm good.

It's going to be a

11 to hit you. No.
Misses you. Basically, like, go underneath the water, shh, goes by.
Oh, hell yeah. And then coming towards you, I'm sorry.
I pick up my hammer. I ride run a little boat.
Nice.

So the two other heads snap by.

No impact.

When you're in the middle.

You're like all riding in the water, trying to like tread water as best as you can. And it carries you shh around the corner,

underneath like where the broken gate was, into the next chamber beyond, shh, rocketing through.

And eventually you can see like, there's just a wall and the water, you don't know where it's going to come to. And Grammy's like,

it's just like being driving up and over the surface. The serpent is

slithering up along the wall, trying to keep up with you all. And you can see its shadow going up on the edge and trying to follow suit.
As you're getting to that point, the water then

ducks beneath. It's sucked into an underground basin and everything goes dark.
All of you have to hold your breath in the last minute.

Hold your breath, Grem. And then pulled under.
I need you all to roll a protection roll for me. What on earth? Roll D20 and add your protection.
Oh, that, that, that.

This is more or less your endurance. What's protection?

20 for statistics.

29. 20.
21. 19 for Gremek! 20! 1!

No!

Pardon me!

So,

an impossible period of time passes. Seconds, minutes, who knows? Of shadow, where you are holding your breath till your lungs begin to burn, until you have no choice but to about to

your jettisoned out of a river waterfall down into a lake.

On the opposite side of that mountain edge. Shh, and release as all of you can eventually come to the surface.

Get your breath and swim there for a second and look at each other and check in.

Grandma gets up there, and you see the floating shoulders

of Barnaby, who is currently in the process of drowning. Barnaby!

Swim to him and try to grab him. Yeah, flip him over.

Okay. I'm just gonna whack him in his chest.
Awesome. Roll a strength check for me.
Okay.

To be to 10.

Definitely. 20.
20.

Whoam! Kind of cracks your sternum. Let's be real.
You're going to be so for a while, but you.

And it just like sprays through the helmet.

Some of it gets in your own eyes because there's not a lot of room for it to go.

Oh, God.

I think the boomerang took me. It took me, I'll be honest.
It did take me for a minute there. Thank you.
Thank you.

I go over to Sensei and

I grab the rock that is just above room temperature and I place it on your chest.

Is this? That is the rock that is just above room temperature. It's true.
How heavy is that rock? So heavy.

It drags you back underwater.

Oh gosh, there it goes.

It seems that these items weren't useless magic at all. Never.
It was just dependent on how you use them.

Yes, as all things are. We couldn't hear that, though, because you're

driving.

But I tried to get that gross.

You all take a minute to recover your breath and get an idea of where you now sit amongst the forest.

It takes you the better part of the afternoon before you can finally return to the White Deer Inn.

Exhausted, waterlogged. But nevertheless, Alex, Hilda, and Pete are there waiting.
And as soon as you step within the door, looking worse for wear, Alex immediately pipes up, Friends!

Friends, you've returned! My goodness.

Tell me, what did you find? Did you find the treasure? It was fun!

It was

quite thrilling and exhilarating. We were supposed to find stuff.

We did. Oh, we did.

You did? We found a lot of... We found a Josso giant serpent.
There's a giant, giant serpent. Down there, it's a lot.
At some point, you may want to get that looked at. Yeah.

Alright. Armies of men, perhaps.
Yeah, we did leave that door open.

Yeah, we'd have to go down the... You would have to.
Right. I'm just saying inevitably.
Yeah, no, that door is open. You might wanna.

do what I need to have before we even think. But the treasure.
Did you find the treasure? And

big old hairy paw pushes past your shoulders as a barely conscious, bloodied Gremek steps forward and goes,

I'm the treasure.

And Alex goes.

Alright, you know what? I'll give you half what I promised. It's fine.
I'll find somebody else to figure out where it is, but thank you all.

And he counts up a bunch of potch and gives you a pouch. And he's like, why do I keep doing this?

I'm just like, it's okay, honey. He's like,

maybe I'm not cut out for this treasure hunting business.

To be fair,

you're probably not. You ran at the first sign of day.
No, you told me to go home to my family. I did.
No, I told you to go home. And you know, this is a really nice inn.
Yes. This is a great inn.

I couldn't run an inn this nice.

Nah, this is a

I'm gonna give you a hundred potch for the evening and the food that you gave us and a little extra for 10. He kind of looks looks you all over.

I think you've certainly put in the work. It's fine.

I go to

Remic and I like remove the necklace and I go,

everyone says this is clashing. Maybe this will fetch you a pretty pretty pretty potch.

Takes it.

Hmm.

I could probably hawk this in Muse City.

It's definitely an artifact.

Smells great too. Sorry, Monopoly.
Smells real good.

It's real.

Yeah, it's really nice. It's feels sweet.

It's uh

herbal. It's

reminds me of

dawn on a fine spring eve. Oh.
That's the mold down there. It's amazing.
Oh, I shouldn't be breathing this guy.

Okay, well, you know what?

For the first venture in, you've taught me how to get through the front door, and that was the first step.

With that knowledge, I'll keep an eye out for some other possibly talented folks that might be able to get a little...

a little further in. There has to still be treasure in there.
It's too big a temple. I got faith.
But in the meantime, why don't you guys stay the night? We'll take care of it.

We'll get your breakfast. And uh,

hey, who knows?

You're mercenaries, right? Yeah, yeah,

yeah, yeah, more or less, traitor. Just heard a rumor that there is some sort of a

an odd scuffle that might be breaking this armistice. Conflict might be on its way.

Looks like there could be opportunity coming up

anyway. That sounds dope.

Well,

let's get you some croissants. You hold up, yeah,

Where's the ale? Carbs and sleep. Carbs and sleep.

Where's Pete at? You didn't open that jar, did you? You just hear Piss!

And that's where we're going to end our adventure for today. Piss!

Oh, my goodness. Thank you all

so much for coming along from this insanity.

That snake is

awesome. That was terrifying.

Oh, God.

No more.

Well, fun bit.

you know, canonically in Suicide and 2, you get to continue this adventure at this temple. This temple exists there and that snake might have something to do with that temple.

So this, while it's not a canon within Suicidin, what we did today, it is inspired by the events.

I did try and fit it somewhere in the narrative where at least if you play through Suicide and 2, you can be like, I know this place.

Keep an eye for some familiar things.

I had a feeling you were clicking. I was like,

there's something here.

There is indeed. But no, thank you all so much for joining us.

Thank you.

Once again, go through Ashley Johnson, Towson Jaffe, Ceno Robinson, Sack Ronaldo, Aaron Hanson.

I want to tell the folks they can find you on places on the internet and such?

You can find me at Zach the Bold on YouTube, TikTok, Instagram, wherever you get your short form content, where I make D ⁇ D videos and magic videos. You can check me out there.
Fantastic.

I'm at Childish Gamzino at all.

Any and all

social media platforms. Yeah.
Hell yeah.

And go check these two out.

Oh, yeah. And you two.

You just have to maybe Google it.

If you want to do the legwork, go ahead.

Check these two out. Hell yeah.
He's worth it. He's worth it a hundred times.
Great people at the stable. Thank you so much for joining us.
It was so much fun.

Thank you. Thank you, Konami, for letting us play in your world.

As part of this weekend in one and two HD

remaster, this was, oh man,

they sent me an early copy so I can prep for this, and it was such a flashback to my childhood.

It's hard way over. Hell yeah, come on, I'll show you.

But thank you so much for playing it once again. Reminder, well, this is not canonical to Suicidin 1 and 2 HD Remaster.
It is inspired by the events there, but we're so happy to play in it.

We hope you had as much fun as we did.

And may you indeed find the treasure that is Grumman inside all of us. Yeah.

Love you very much. Thank you for joining us.
See y'all next time.

Thank you so much for joining us on this adventure. To help new listeners discover the show, please give us a rating and review on whatever podcasting app you're listening on.

Until next time, is it Thursday yet?

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