Unbelievable Prison Survival Tactics You Never Knew | Garet Mclendon DSH #748

I mean, there was one that they left it, like, it was just on the side of the road, and then it was for sale.

And, like, you know, just like a.

No, it was just like, it was just like a random thing.

I called a guy and met him there.

Like, I was interested and watched how he, you know, killed the kill switch and all that stuff.

I went back the next day and took it, you know.

So

all right, guys, Garrett McLendon here.

You might have the most traffic tickets out of anyone I know, man.

I appreciate it, man.

Yeah.

160, right?

168.

I have a printout of all those tickets, you know.

I went to the courthouse and, you know, I was like, let me get a printout.

And it was just like a sheet of paper just like unfolding, like, just,

you know, hilarious.

I'm surprised they didn't arrest you when you went to the courthouse.

Yeah, me too.

Did you ever pay any of them?

I ended up having to pay, I had to pay for all that stuff.

All the restitution, everything that,

everything, I mean, community service, paying traffic times, doing time for, I mean, you had to, I had to, because I wanted a driver's license.

And so

I didn't get a driver's license until I was 34.

Holy crap.

Yeah.

So you were driving around just in your 20s.

I was all doing my, I mean, from the age of 16 to 15, I was just like, I mean, first car at 15 years old and just started driving.

And so I think in that first car, I probably got 50 tickets.

Holy crap.

Yeah.

And what were they for, made me speeding?

For everything that you can think of, you know,

not no turning, no blinkers, you know, expedition to speed, you know,

everything, you know, after a time, I think that they just saw me coming in that car and they just pulled me over because they knew I didn't have a driver's license.

They were like, oh, this guy, yeah, let's get him.

Easy money, right?

Yeah, easy money.

Did you end up going to jail for any of those?

I ended up going to jail for, as the time spent up, I ended up going to jail for all that stuff.

After a while, I mean, it starts building up and building up.

And those tickets become like a big old package.

And so like, you know, at first it was just like, to me, you're out there getting pulled over all the time.

It's like just another ticket, just another ticket.

And then all of a sudden, it comes into a big old bundle when you're facing like, you know, 20, 30, 40 of them.

And yeah, I went to jail.

That's how I felt with parking tickets.

I'm like, I'm just going to let these pile up.

Yeah, don't do it.

Don't do it.

I might still have some from Jersey.

Yeah, the fines.

I mean, like the fines, all of a sudden you get hit with these fines or you go to, you know, somewhere else.

I have ones not only out there in like Los Angeles, but in different counties too.

And like, and all of a sudden, like, you know, it's like, you know, $1,000 or $1,500 ticket or war.

You're like, what?

I don't, how has that happened?

And then, oh, yeah, I got that ticket out there, right?

Yeah.

But the thing you got popped for was the stealing motorcycles, right?

I got popped for,

I got popped for lots of things, you know, stealing motorcycles, stealing cars,

drugs.

And

yeah, that's why another reason why I had so many tickets is because I kept on stealing cars and

I get busted in the car.

And then, you know, and so.

It just kept on going on, a big old cycle.

Yeah.

What was the mindset behind that stealing the car stuff?

You just needed money?

needed money definitely so i i was into you know you know the fast and the furious comes out and you know we're getting into all this the racing car stuff and um and my mindset was is that i wanted a i wanted a fast car and i couldn't afford it so i wanted to steal a car that had all the stuff that i needed and that uh you know so i can go race it you know on this on saturday so you're going after nice cars i was going to decent ones not really nice because you know their alarm systems and and the stuff they have on those cars are something i couldn't get past you know but like on a you know on on ones you see out there at the races you you'd be out there at the street races and you see these cars and uh and you sort of just you know scope them out and yeah follow them home follow them home right you know uh i remember was one i that they left it like um it was just on the side of the road and and that it was for sale and like uh you know just like after the race no it was just like it was just like a random thing that this car was you know tuned and it was nice and um I called a guy and met him there.

Like I was interested and watched how he, you know, killed the kill switch and all that stuff.

And then I went back the next day and took it, you know.

So he had a kill switch in there.

Yeah, yeah, a kill switch.

So how do you combat that if you steal it?

You can't.

I mean, if you can find it, you can find it.

But a lot of times it's in the common places, under a bumper and a fender, like, you know, or something like that.

And, you know, so you find it, you know, or you don't.

So, you know, either you sit there and it turns over and over and over and over and over and over, you know, and you can maybe bypass it down there and ignition or something like that.

Or you just, you know, you got to find out.

You got to watch the car and find out where the person's hitting the switch at, you know?

Got it.

And what was the technique?

You would go at night, break the window open, and then hot wire it?

I would not break a window.

I go in there.

A lot of times I had shaved keys or

I make keys and I have a kick.

I don't want to be driving a car stolen with a broken window.

I try to keep it intact as much as possible.

So I do your homework on the car and look it up.

And

a shaved key, filed, shaved, cut, intricate, you know, get in there, jiggler, you know, open the door, get inside the ignition.

A lot of times I just...

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unplug it and the only thing i would break is i'm so big that i was able to just snap the the lock staring on it you know and um

and plug it in and then plug my own ignition in.

So wow, yeah.

You had a system.

Yeah, I had a system.

Yeah.

Damn, that's crazy.

Do those keys still work these days or not?

I don't think so.

Nowadays, I don't think.

You know what?

Possibly, but

it's been so long.

I mean, 10 years is a long time to

technology and everything has probably advanced so much that it definitely, definitely is different.

Now I got a Tesla.

There's no key.

Yeah.

The key is my phone.

But even if you steal my phone, you need a pin.

Yeah.

You literally can't steal a Tesla.

I mean, nowadays you walk up to your car and the door opens itself.

Yeah.

It's probably a lot harder to steal cars these days.

100%.

It still happens, but I feel like most people do it now to sell the parts.

I think nowadays they're just stealing the Catholic converters.

I don't even think they're going after the cars.

No, some guy just died, actually, in LA.

Oh, really?

Celebrity, yeah.

They were stealing it and he was.

Oh, he's still in his Catholic converter.

The guy from

a hospital.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That was crazy.

Yeah.

What much are those worth?

I mean, his life?

I don't know his life.

I mean,

what are you going to do if someone's stealing your Catholic converter in a car?

I mean, you're going to, if anybody, we're going to rush them or we're going to see, hey, that's my car.

And it's just unfortunate that that that happened to that guy, you know?

Just for a few thousand bucks.

I don't even know if it's a few thousand.

I'm thinking it's like a hundreds, you know, but damn, I could be wrong.

You know, it's crazy.

Yeah.

All that for hundreds.

And it wasn't even his car.

It was some girl.

Oh, man.

He was just defending her.

Man, that's crazy.

Crazy, man.

Yeah.

LA, man.

LA, it's crazy.

That's how it is out there, right?

They come packing with guns that they steal your Catholic converters, you know.

And you see that with a lot more people out there and like with teams or with like a group, you know, I i was out there like solo bono on it you know nowadays they have people you know just you know a group of people going around stealing catalytic converters and vans of carrying carrying guns and stuff you know

rolling deep in san francisco it's scary right it's scary you know like places that we used to go out and and park our cars and we think it'd be all safe and now you know people are getting killed over over some simple stuff man and uh protecting our own stuff you know So you were big in the race scene too?

I loved, well, I just loved cars

and I loved racing.

I had had a friend of mine that

when I was I was very young we used to rate he picked me up.

I mean very young he picked me up we go racing all the time I just I loved it and I and I continued to go to the street races and get in the cars and all that stuff and but I never had a license I never had a driver's license you know and

and fortunately my buddy he got hit by a drunk driver you know out there at the street races you know

and

And that was hard, you know.

Someone was street racing drunk?

They run rows, so it'd be like

five races at a time.

You know, you sit there on the side, and then and that and a guy was drink.

I mean, yeah, there's always drugs and alcohol involved out there, you know?

Yeah.

More, you know, alcohol.

Maybe not a lot, but, you know, some drinking going on.

And

a guy was drinking and he and the five cars do a shootout, or they shoot down, race after race after race, and then they drive back.

And a guy was coming back, and I was talking to my buddy right there, and with another friend of mine, and he's sort of I'm standing in the dirt, my buddy's standing in the the dirt he's standing on the street and as uh as he drives back up um

you know like a guy goes to do like fishtails or to you know circles not donuts just like sort of just to get on the gas he loses it and my friend steps out and sort of does like a 180 turn and uh and got clipped by the car yeah broke his neck against the you know broke his neck you know a guy crashed at the end of the street it was it was a big old uh it was a big old scene you know holy shit yeah did he recover from that he died

yeah he died passed away he died right right there on impact.

Oh, my God.

Yeah.

That's traumatic, man.

Yeah.

Jesus.

It was dramatic.

That was the first death you witnessed.

That was the first one.

And it really made me not want to drink alcohol.

It really turned me against all that.

I feel that.

But

yeah, it was hard.

And

it was even harder.

I was young.

And it was like, man, it must have been.

you know, five or seven, you know, years later, you know, like I run into his mom, you know, and, you know, and like a in a random place, you know, and I haven't seen her for years, you know, but I used to hang out at his house.

We used to, you know, he picked me up from school.

He was older than me.

He was like an older brother, you know.

And, yeah.

That's crazy.

Did she know what happened?

She knew by what everybody told her, but I mean, it was pretty obvious.

You know, the car lost control.

He stepped out into the street.

You know, car lost control, hit him, you know, his head, you know, he died on impact.

Damn, the car must have been going fast, then it wasn't, I don't even think it was going that fast, dude.

Oh, wow.

Yeah, it was, I think it was just some of those things that he got hit and just the angle of whatever happened sort of.

Yeah, if you land on your head, even if it's like 10, 20 miles an hour, it's probably a lot.

Yeah, if you got hit, I mean, if you hit and if you land on it, it just

breaks your neck or head damage or whatever it is.

It was gone, you know.

That's nuts.

How did the races work?

Like, how do you determine who you go up against and how you're going to be able to do it?

The races were fun.

You know, this is, you know, you go out there, you have a fast car, and everybody knows you're fast because we used to go to the, you know,

we race on Friday nights out there at the racetrack.

We have to keep our numbers on our car, you know, or, you know, for the legal ones.

And then you just know, like it's a competitive thing.

So if you're out there and you're racing your car, you just know which one's fast and which one's not.

But the thing is, is that people get to know that, hey, this race is right here and these races right here are the ones that

are happening.

And so people from Los Angeles

or from other places would come.

So the cops would come and break it up about 9.30, 10 o'clock, and everybody would disperse.

It'd be like at that time early it'd be like just cars lined up in two different directions and you know some people racing you know like people you know trying to show off but then like 10 you know the cops would show up and everybody would run away and then um

and it seemed like maybe an hour after that like we go to in-n-out we eat a burger or something you know wow and then that was always a spot it's like fast and furious yeah and then we go back and uh and then people would bring in and it'd be like a late night session like a lot of go back and we go back like 11 o'clock 12 o'clock and it'd be a lot it'd be more the racers and and not so much of this the the people who uh who just wanted to come and hang out you know and so that's crazy yeah the cops probably can't get all you guys because there's so many i think a lot of times they just don't want us grouping and hanging out because you know you get a lot of people in the groups like that stuff happens you know drunk fights people you know all all that stuff you don't want to happen happen so i think the cops just come and try to to keep the peace yeah you know i feel keep the peace and uh and and every now and then you know i'm gonna tell you that at those late night races uh that you know uh some of the sheriffs, man, they had some nice cars too, and they bring them out there on the trailer and they race us.

You know what?

So, yeah, so it was cool, you know.

That's crazy.

You get people out there bringing their cars and running them.

It was good, man.

That's interesting.

You've been to Speed Vegas out here?

I'm going there today.

Oh, shit.

You're definitely going to set some records.

Yeah.

You go like 200 miles per hour on that track.

I know, I can't wait.

What's the fastest you've gone?

I've probably done 180.

Damn.

Yeah.

And I'm close to 180.

I mean, usually on all that speedometers, they hit like 160 and something, they stop.

So you don't don't know.

It's just wrapping around, you know, and so.

My friend Tony Nino, shout out to Tony.

He said there's a race across the country.

I forget what it's called, but you start in like New York and you go to Cali.

The first one there wins.

Oh, wow.

Yeah.

He got arrested, though.

Oh, and his car?

Yeah, he was going 180.

Oh, nice.

Yeah.

Like, they took his car and everything.

Oh, yeah.

I need to look up what that race is called because that sounds crazy.

I heard of that race.

It does ring bells from New York to LA.

I even think they did a movie,

a couple movies about it and stuff like that.

It's like two, three days.

Two, three days, and you're driving day and night through every single city.

And yeah.

That's nuts, right?

That'd be so fun.

I mean, I think that would be so fun, you know, right?

It'd be cool to see who actually makes the city.

Yeah,

yeah, it would be.

I don't think, I'd wonder what percentage of people get arrested or how many people lose their cars.

I wonder how many people actually finish

and make it all the way through.

And what's their speed?

Are they actually keeping it 180 or are they actually doing 150?

I mean, when I drove from NJ to LA, we were going like at least 120 the whole way there.

Yeah, I mean, it's so boring.

It's so boring.

I mean, might as well speed.

Yeah.

If you go 60 the whole time, you're going to take an extra day, actually.

So

got to gamble a little bit.

Yeah.

We got pulled over in Cali, actually.

Did you?

Yeah, the cop was cracking up because all the trucks were honking as they were passing us, which means that guy's been speeding, I guess.

So the cop could not hold it in.

He let us go.

Oh, really?

Yeah, we got lucky.

That's a good thing.

It was a trooper, too.

Oh, trooper?

State troopers don't mess around.

They don't, man.

They're real.

In Jersey, I've never gotten out of a state trooper.

For real, dude.

I've never been pulled over by a state trooper.

Really?

Yeah.

That's surprising.

Yeah, that's surprising.

I never had a face-to-face or anything like that with a state trooper.

So, wow.

So, I hope I don't.

I hope I don't.

It's not worth it, man.

So, how long did you go to prison for?

I was in prison in and out for

at least, I don't know, 13 years.

Damn.

Yeah.

You got a big sentence.

In and out, like, I mean, 15, 13 to 15 years, I did a little county time.

You know, all those, all those tickets started counting up.

And

all my tickets were counting up.

And then I was getting in more trouble, you know, stolen cars, getting caught in stolen cars.

And I did a little bit of county time.

And then the bigger stuff happened.

You know, I mean, drugs and gangs and all this stuff got involved.

And I got caught up in this vicious cycle.

And for the next 15 years, man, it didn't matter.

Like,

I was in prison.

I was a lot less on the street and a whole bunch in prison.

And then by this time too, drugs and alcohol

became a necessity

instead of like something just to chill back on, like it was something I needed every single day.

And so it just like I go in jail.

I figure like prison saved me.

And I go into prison and it felt like,

man, I'm off the streets.

I'm safe.

I'm getting some discipline of getting up and going to work and doing these things in there that I'm not used to on the streets.

And then I get on the streets and it was like all that stuff just left me.

And I take a drink and a drink leads me to a drug.

And the next thing I know, I'm still in cars.

And now it's not even about racing them on the Saturdays.

I'm just everywhere I go.

It's just like I'm drag racing everywhere.

Damn.

So when you were in prison, you were completely sober.

And then when you get out, you would.

Immediately, immediately, right after I get out,

I would take it.

It was like I would celebrate.

They would talk about freedom

when you get out of prison, like, oh, man, everybody's coming over.

Oh, you're getting freed tomorrow you know that's you know i wish you know it was happening to me and then i i felt like every time i got out i was everything but free yeah because i had this disease in me you know like that that that that was just like neutralized because i got busted and in my environment it wasn't around i was able to to like self-control like you know yeah you know and then i i get out and i immediately like the first day i that maybe a day or two before i start feeling like something like uncomfortable on my insides because i knew when i got out i was going to take a drink no matter how much i thought or how much i i i was like you know it's not gonna it's gonna be different you know i'm not gonna do that i immediately would pick up a drink man and that drink would leave me to a drug and and that would leave me to another 10 or 15 more traffic tickets you know was that because of your environment the people you were around mainly oh absolutely i i think that environment you know that's all i knew and so and so and being being that life and everybody i hung out with that's all they did they drank and they used and uh and that's and that's family members my mom everybody like it was it was there and and they'd be like oh you know that's um

you know maybe maybe they would like try to be a good example but uh but i would i would go out and you know like i would celebrate man i i go and grab a 40 or i grab a you know just for this this two-hour bus ride i i take a 40 you know i i never arrived home sober on any occasion that's crazy yeah it's kind of ironic in jail you're actually behaving and then yeah you know when you get out you're going wild yeah it's crazy like the and it's just i don't know if it's like something like getting out of your environment or because you know here we are we're in this jail and everything's so monotone and like you know uh you know the times of everything you know chow and and whether you're in a lockdown you're working out in your cell like you have a little a little job in there you're like you know you're doing all this stuff like you got this it keeps you busy that keeps you busy you know and you get out and like all that's gone and like and you know and for me the first thing i did was drink and then i'd be like all right now i'm gonna go check in the parole or something like that and then and then and then they say no i'm i'm dirty and i can't even go do that you know and so i'm just off and running and damn getting busted again yeah what was that first day like in prison did they run your papers and everything?

Oh, yeah.

First day in prison, man, I was a young kid.

It was sort of like I knew that this was going to happen to me.

Like, I sort of like growing up and everything in my life, hanging out with the people I was hanging out with and doing the things I do.

Like, prison was

seen in my future.

Guaranteed to go, guaranteed this guy right here is going to go to prison.

And so when I arrived in the prison yard,

I'll say that my first time even going into county jail was scary.

You know, it was like, you know,

I'm a big guy so like it was cool but like I was tall I'm skinny you know like you know I don't know what to expect and I know and people test you man and I'll say when I when I arrived on a prison yard you know you you have this fear in you you know because you hear about these stabbings and what you have to do like if if someone calls you this name or or if you know you you you can't be you know you can't be you can't be weak right you know you gotta you gotta be strong from the start you know and so um

and so I was strong from the start.

You got in a fight right away?

I didn't get in a fight right away, but like I never backed down from no fight or any kind of swabble or anything like that.

Like if it was if it was something going to happen, whether it was punching somebody, beating somebody up or doing like that, I immediately was

on it, you know, and so

and that just gets you know, like I think that's like your first test is sort of just seeing if you're like a if you're going to be a person who's willing to to like back like if I have a selly and or you know other guys in there and I can and you see a guy and he's not really sticking up for his self how can I expect this guy to stick up for me like if something happens like we're supposed to be like we're sellies like if we're like lifelong partners we're sellies like we got each other's back you know and uh and if you're not sticking up for yourself how can I expect you to stick up for me so you want to know that this guy that you're with is actually like down for a cause and that as that is like you know like he's gonna have your back yeah you know and that and that just really makes like then it feels like when you're when you're side by side with your selly or something like that you really feel like a strong connection to where, like, you know, I feel a lot, I feel a lot better that I can do the things I do here because I know this guy like is watching my back and I'm watching his.

Yeah, that's probably a huge imprison to know you have someone that will ride or die with you.

Yeah, ride or die with you, man.

That someone's watching my back, dude, 24-7, you know, and that, and that's, and that's, and on a higher levels, that's, that's how it is, man.

We're watching, we're watching over each other, you know?

Were you at a level four?

I was at, I started off on a level four yard at the age of like 20 years old, you know, and

it was, it was, man, that, that was like to me it was sort of like

it was like a you know like i i was waiting for this day you know you know i thought i thought i would get all blasted back with all these tattoos you know i thought that the life and the way i grew up and my life i was living i thought my life was just going to be all all prison you know i thought i was just waiting to catch more time to come back you know like i i thought like you know i i go in there and people learn a lesson i'm going there and picking up new friends and and new ideas and and you know and uh and and new recipes it to take out into the real world.

But I felt that

since I couldn't control the drugs and alcohol when I was out there on the streets, and then when I come to jail and my mind was sober and

I had this neutrality of that I was a lot sharper of a person,

and

so yeah, I just kept on going with it.

Yeah, we'll dive into the recovery stuff later.

That's important.

How do they determine what level of prison you go to when you get started?

Points about the crime you did, you know, so like, you know,

i mean not only was i stealing cars i did a i did a great bottle of injury on a person and i i stole all these cars and you know and i i have my hands and like uh around with messing around with methamphetamine and and and manufacturing it and so like uh you were making it a little bit you know yeah yeah i was making it you know i mean i i had my hands in it you know and uh and then i and then i had like an arsenal of weapons you know and so like all that stuff added up uh you know like the the stuff that did stick was like the weapons and uh and the and the and the and the and the great bottle of injury you know what i'm saying to a person and

having a chop shop at my house.

Yeah, and so I mean,

you know, it's about

you know what, yeah, it's a lot of felonies, and it all ends up, and so it gives you a strike.

So it's like a point system, and it's all a point system.

And then if you get inside, and if you're inside there and you get in a fight, you know, there's more points.

The more you misbehave in there, the higher your points go.

And you go from a double to a single confinement into a hole, you know, you're living in a dog cage, you know, to your to where you're locked down 23 hours a day.

And then, um,

and then, you know, and then that's it.

That's your life.

You know, 23 hours a day

and a six by, you know, eight cell, you know, and, and, and you're just learning how to live inside there.

That's tough.

Do you think about if the fight is worth taking or not?

Because it'll add a couple months to your sentence or whatever.

I never think about it.

You just take it.

Oh, wow.

Yeah, I never thought about it.

You know, I got to a point when you're young and you're in jail like that, you want to fight.

You know, you're just like, I'll do it.

You know, I'll do it.

I'll do it.

And a lot of times when

it was like,

a one-on-one,

you're checking somebody.

You can get away with that.

When you're disciplining somebody in there,

there's ways that

you get away with all that stuff.

It's just like when a riot breaks out or when it's with another race that it gets a little different, because then it's like they're taking

10 to 15 of us out and 10 to 15 of them out and they're changing the whole dynamics of the whole thing, trying to separate everybody, so we're not fighting no more.

How common were those race wars?

The hardest race wars I was in was in the county jail.

Okay.

You know, and it seemed like you know, like the county jail was like your, was like your little ship before you got to the big ship.

And

the politics inside the county were way, like just really the fine lines inside there are really, really strong.

Really?

You know, yeah, like it was like, and it was scary.

And the thing is, and like the riots and all that stuff inside the county jail, like were way more scarier because there was no control.

There was a lot less control from the from the the the the sheriff's department would just let you fight you know

and it seemed like it would go on forever before they came in like they it'd be like a couple dogs fighting and you're just letting the dogs just like fight it out a little bit before you can pull them apart you know because that the energy you know and so like we in the county jails like when you're like the dorms would kick off or something like that man it was it was like the scariest thing man wow it was scary man it'd be like life or death like you you really would think man like my my life and inside some of those county jail riots were like, man, I thought, man, like, I just, I, I seen the horrible stuff go down and, uh, and I, uh, and I, just to think that that could have happened to me.

And so it was just like, uh, it was a lot more scary in there.

And in the prison, it seemed like they, the reaction would be like, you know, you know, five or 10 minutes, you know, but they, if you're on the yard,

within like two to three minutes of, of, of something happening, boom, they put the yard down.

And, you know, you get back up and it'd be like for a minute or something like that.

And in the county jail it seemed like it was just like fighting for like five minutes straight you know that's a long time it's a long it's a long time bro and it's like and it's like gladiators you got you got a wall of people on one side and a wall and it was like just just going at it you know yeah and it was uh

man how common were weapons in the county one oh weapons are you know you learned that you can make a weapon out of everything you know and um and the and the And the

I gotta say it, the way they sculpt it and make all those weapons inside there is a a level of ingenuity of building and design that

like, god damn.

There's videos of it now.

Yeah, like those, like prison shit, how they, I mean, literally how

I wasn't one of those smart ones that was able to think, you know, this mop bucket handle could be shaved down and tied to a razor handle with some with some plastic bag, you know, and to make a shank, you know, type things.

Like

I've seen the

craziest, you know, the craziest things, man, and turn into, you a piece of plastic, you know, just turned into the most worst weapon ever in your life, man.

And

it blows my mind.

And that's all it takes to the neck, too.

And that's all it takes, the neck, to the gut.

I mean, 15 times and that, like, it depends if they want to kill them or they want you to live, you know.

But when you're in a riot like that,

yeah,

it's crazy, you know?

Everything's off the table in the situation.

Everything's off the table when it comes out.

When you know you get a kite or something like that, and you know at 4 o'clock or on your, you know, at 4 o'clock it's going to start, it's happening that you you just know man and um and you know that everybody's everybody is is just coming with their with whatever they got you know absolutely i want to dive into the recovery side of things and also repairing the relationship with your family let's do it man because that took 20 years right yeah um well due to my addiction and everything that i had going on that you know um

that uh i had bet the best of both worlds uh you know by the time you know i i was raised by my mom mom was boy at heart and i stuck with my mom and um my sisters you know they were there with my dad and

for 17 years, you know,

I didn't talk to my dad or my sisters, you know, I see him briefly once or twice, you know, I get out from that prison term, you know, that I had and I get out from that prison term I had and I get a girl pregnant.

I have a little girl, you know, and my addiction to disease

wouldn't allow me to, you know, I didn't know how to care or love.

I didn't know nothing.

I was addicted to the streets and the drugs and all that stuff.

And I had this little girl and like I didn't even know how to be a dad.

You know, I thought maybe I did, you know, but I didn't.

You know, and

on March 17th, 2013 is the day that is my sobriety date.

Nice.

And

after that, like

at this point, I haven't talked to my dad.

I had all those tickets.

I haven't talked to my dad.

I haven't, you know, my mom is one of my best using partners.

You know, like it's

a tragic life out there, you know.

And,

you know uh

I remember that um after about six months of me

being in this in a in a recovery home as uh I had a you know that my mom and my mom always pushed me to to to get a relationship with my dad you know really yeah and you know and I but I was too I was too ignorant to even you know but no you know I was mad at him for things that were imagined you know like you know leaving her no not even leaving her I was mad over a I was mad over a wheelbarrow you you know, honestly, over a wheelbarrow, man.

It was, you know, they said I stole it and I borrowed it, you know, and it was, and it caused some ruckus in the family.

And,

you know, and they signed me off.

I wouldn't change my ways, is the whole thing.

I was a liar, a cheat, I'm a snake, you know, I'm manipulative, and anything that came out of my mouth was a lie because I write all these letters and why I was locked up about how I was going to change my life, but I would never change my life.

And so they just get tired of hearing that sob story all the time, all the time, all the time.

And I don't blame them.

You know, I see it from a different perception now.

And

that line from my dad is

at about

eight months or so.

I don't know how much time I had.

It was within a year.

And my dad said, the first thing I, you know, I reached out to him.

I got a hold of him.

He says, the first thing I have to do is I have to get rid of all this hate and negativity on my socials,

in which I didn't see it at the time, but it was full of nothing but negative and hate.

You were hating on him on social media?

Not hating on that, just like you know the the people in my circles you know you know you know and um i i had a i had a i had to um let go of a lot of stuff that i thought was like friendships and relationships you know and um and uh but i did it i listened you know and then um

he's uh

there was a visit my counselor worked out a visit

And I haven't seen my dad in probably, I seen him maybe once, maybe twice.

He picked me up from jail one time and he asked me those questions.

He'd be like, you know, know, what are you going to do with your life?

You know, and once again, I'm fresh out of jail.

Right.

And so I'm talking all the time, I'm going to get a job.

You know, everything's going to be good, dad.

I'm going to come see you.

And he's like, you know, can you come over for my, you know, my birthday's this weekend?

Are you able to come by?

And

I didn't make it, man.

He dropped me off.

I get drunk.

I get loaded and I wouldn't make it, you know?

And

my counselor mediated a little thing for us to get together.

And

my stepmom, he's been married, you know, my dad was married again for like 30 years, you know, and

he comes through.

And

man, I got to tell you, I was sitting in the little room, you know, and I was thinking, you know, all this hatred and all this negativity that was built up inside me that I had towards my father because I felt like he should have been there in my life.

You know, like I had all this stuff, all these mixed emotions

and stuff were going through.

And

when my dad walked through that door with my stepmom,

man like i i stood up man i i saw my dad as a uh i saw my dad as a whole different man he was just like man he was he was a lot older you know wow you know yeah and i the only thing i could do is i walked up over to him man and i and i gave him this big old hug and i and i i just said dad man and i and it was a big hug man and um I said, I love you.

He says, I love you too.

And I just said, man, from this point on forward, you know, I'd like to be your son.

It's never too late, man, for a son and a, you know, a dad and a son to start a relationship.

And from that point on, I started a relationship with my dad.

And

I would just, I showed up when I was supposed to show up.

If I told him I was going to do something, I did it.

If I was invited somewhere that concerned him, I was there.

I go to his house.

I didn't have a car.

I'm still early in my survey.

I don't have a car yet, a license yet or nothing.

I'm still taking care of all that stuff.

And I just go to his house and I sit there with them and hang out with him.

And

I remember that I was sitting there one day watching the football game with him, man.

And I remember he looked over at me, you know, because I'm still active in my recovery.

And I go to his house and I'd be like, dad, you know, like it's fun sitting here with you and all this stuff, but I have to go to a meeting.

And he, you know, and they, and they, and every time, anytime I was there, it didn't matter holidays or whatever it was, I always, like,

I went to a meeting, man.

And

but I'll never forget the day he looked over, man, and he looked over at me, and he said, son, man, he said, I want you to know I love you.

Wow.

And there was something that was inside of me.

That was something that maybe

the young kid in me, the young boy in me, that's what I wanted to hear, right?

So it like filled me up with this joy, man.

And I'm going to tell you, I had the best, I had absolutely the greatest relationship a son can have with his dad, you know, until the moment he passed away.

Wow.

You know, and

I love it, man.

I'll tell you about that, that little girl who was born and who I wasn't even, I wasn't even in the hospital.

Like when she was born, I was, I'm full on of my disease of addiction.

And like, and my disease was calling me as she was being, as she was being brought into this world.

And I, and I took off.

You weren't even there?

I took off.

I was there.

Like, I was there.

You know, I took off.

I took off.

Like, the drugs started wearing off.

Everything starts wearing off.

I'm feeling like I'm just, I'm not feeling like if I wasn't, if I wasn't like up here with drugs and alcohol, like I didn't want to do nothing.

Like as soon as that buzz starts to wear off or some level of me, like it starts getting slow, like, dude, I have to go.

I got to move.

I got to, I got to go, go, got to go, got to go.

You know, and I got to say that little girl, I took her around and I did everything wrong that that father should do with the little girl, like as taking her when she was three, when she was five.

She didn't even know by the time she was four years old and I got out of prison,

she didn't even know who I was.

Damn.

You know, like she, she, I wasn't there.

I wasn't around.

Like I was there maybe once or twice.

Like I went, I saw her maybe once or twice, very briefly at any given time.

You know, and

this is, this is, this is the hard part, man.

This is, this is what's really sad,

is that I came in this little girl's life and my disease, man.

And I built all that trust back up with her, man.

And, and, uh, you know, and I, and I told her one day, you know, and I think I'm doing good, but I'm still living that life out there.

And I'll never forget, man.

And she's like, dad, you want to watch this movie with me?

And I was like, you know what, dad, we'll be right back.

Man, I didn't come back for years later.

I went, I left that night, I got arrested that day, you know.

I went, I got arrested, you know, and I didn't see her for years, man.

And um, I wonder if she remembers that.

I'm sure she does, man.

I'm sure she would remind me, you know, but um,

but I'll tell you this: is that uh, you know, at that same time I started building a relationship back up with my dad, that um, I started building that relationship up with that girl

and and it and all that trust I built up, man.

Like I see that I built all that trust up and I broke it, man.

And I probably did that two or three times.

And so by the time she's nine years old, man, really needs her dad about this time in her life.

And

I made sure that when I built it up, I wasn't going to break it.

And I showed up and I did everything, everything possible just to be present in her life, you know?

And

to this day, man, that little girl, man, I'm proud of her in every single way possible, man.

She's in college.

Wow.

You know, she's like you know we have a relationship she texted me you know this morning before i got here it's like you know dad you know go on there you know kill it you know like you know and uh and i and i love that man and uh man it puts me in tears man dude that's beautiful you got me tearing up yeah

i'm tearing over that dude and uh and uh and uh and man and she's like my pride and joy man like i we started surfing together like way when she was young you know like uh you know new new channels of life you know new hobbies and like i can't be stealing and racing cars no more you know but i i got into surfing, and at the same time, my daughter got into surfing.

And now, like, our greatest time is out there just sitting on a surfboard out in the ocean together.

Yeah.

And

I might tell you, man, there's lots of stuff that money could take you and buy you, man.

But sitting out there in the ocean, whether there's waves or not, with my daughter is one of the greatest things that I could ever ask for, man.

That's a free thing you could do.

It's a free, man.

Freedom, dude.

Yeah.

It doesn't cost a thing, dude.

The conversations out there,

the life,

you sit up,

is beyond, beyond, man, anything out of this world I ever should have imagined, you know.

And I'll talk about that mom is sometimes the ones that we love the most are the ones we have to stay away from.

I loved my mom, I loved my mom to death, and my mom was boy at heart.

So all those gangsters go home and get in trouble.

Like she was just like the bread and butter of everything.

And

I knew every time I got out, man,

and I go live on mom's couch, you know,

that I get loaded, you know, or I get drinked, or I take a hit of this, or take a a hit of that

and I had a lover for from a distance for you know for a for from a for a couple years man Yeah, and I remember I was I had maybe a year or almost two of my recovery I'm out of a treatment center I'm renting a room.

I'm on my own, you know, like I'm I still I'm I'm spending a lot of time with my dad and with my daughter and I'm deep down like I feel like something's missing man and what I'm missing is I'm missing that relationship with my mom, you know, because I love her.

I know she's still out there in the disease.

I know that she ain't right.

I know that she, you know, but that see that's not that's not her problem.

Just because I get sober and clean doesn't mean the whole world has to get sober and clean.

You know, I got to be strong enough my own self to be able to be in her presence.

And what I did, man, is I got me a little trudging buddy, you know, and I told him the scenario.

First of all, I was embarrassed and I was shameful of how my mom was living out there and where she was living and the things she was doing, you know, and

I got honest with this friend and

I asked him, man, I was like, hey, man,

can you just come with me?

Because he was like, what's wrong?

What's wrong?

I was like, man, I want to go see my mom, but I don't want to go by myself yeah and I went out there and he went with me to go see my mom and dude and I built a I built a relationship with my mom my mom might have been in the I don't know I don't know man because

once I stopped paying attention to all that disease and that way of living that I just saw my mom as a human being and I make plans with my mom I made sure she saw all of her grandkids her daughter I take her out to dinner if I didn't like where she was staying or where she was living or what she was doing I just pick her up and take her out of that environment and I'd go spend time with her and that's all I did man and I'll tell you this this: man, I was, my mom was in the hospital.

She was getting a stent in her heart, man.

And I, you know, and I went there to pick her up from the hospital and to bring her home.

And I'll never forget, man.

And

I brought her grandson with her, my son, and he ran out the room, you know, and I went and chased him.

And this is where words, man, like words are a lot.

Words mean a lot.

But I'm going to tell you, when I grabbed my son, and I turned around and looked back, you know,

my mom was peeking out the hospital room, the door right there, man.

And it was like in a long time, like our eyes met.

And man, I'm going to tell you, man, like all that, there was no words that you could put in the middle of all that eye contact that she saw her son in a different perspective, man.

Maybe she knew at that point that the program is working in my life and that her, she didn't have to worry about her son being locked up, in prison, in dead, in the paper, or doing all this life, man.

But I looked, we caught eye contact for the very first time.

I didn't make eye contact with many people, a lot of people, anybody when I was out there, man.

But I made eye contact that day with my mom and that love, man, and it was like it felt, it filled that void in me that she just knew, man, like her son is in a good spot, man.

And I thought, man, and I really thought, what I really thought, man, is like, I thought, man, they talk about reservations and all this stuff.

And I was thinking, man, if something ever happened to my mom, I don't know if I could hold it together, you know, my, you know, and

for many years, you know, and I always, man, I made sure that I was always present with my mom on a holiday, as a birthday, his Mother's Day, every day.

I spent, you know,

I put the effort in, you know, and

when my mom was, she got sick, man, it was just a phone call one day, man.

I get a call from my sister.

Mom's not good.

She's going to the hospital.

And I got to say that

this is what blows my mind is that

I was surrounded by a group of men and

I was holding all this in.

Like, I didn't want everybody to be like, oh, man, you know, I didn't want all the empathy from all these people around me.

You know, like, I sort of was just like, like, running with it.

You know, I'm on my bike.

I got tears coming down my eyes

as I'm riding.

I got my helmet on.

So I'm like, I'm shielding.

Nobody can really see me.

You know, I'm driving from A to B.

I'm going to, I'm going to Havastu on my bike or to Laughlin.

And,

you know, we stop here.

And I got a phone call in Victorville or Barstow.

Like, hey, she's going in for a surgery.

And by the time I get into

Laughlin and I jump in the water,

you know, my mom was, it was done.

It was done, man.

And she was gone, dude.

She was gone.

It was a, and, you know, my sister was telling me and

I really felt this, man.

Like there was something, man, like losing your mom.

Like, I lost my dad 11 months earlier and now I'm losing my mom.

I lost a couple of friends.

I just went through like some bad relationship stuff.

And I really felt like, you know, like, man, like this, what's going on, you know, and

man, and do none of that, do any of that stuff, man, did I feel like taking a drink hit her face and putting it to change the way I was feeling, man.

I walked, I walked through all those emotions, man.

Like, and I'm not saying it's easy, I'm not saying that like, like, it didn't have a grip on you and like it's pulling you down.

Like, I just try to, I try to, you know,

self-sacrifice to others, man.

I just try to help other people, man, help other people without without telling them about my problems, man.

I just try to help other people, help other people, help other people.

It was the only thing that was keeping me alive, man.

The only thing that was like helping me not like think about like oh i i should have did this i should have done that i i should you know all this should have would have could have you know the only thing that that that could help me was me just just being like you know what man uh um

that that's it man uh like i i can't take a drink hit or fix to to to to deal with all this emotions and all this pain a guy like me the way i i i i i'm not used to emotions i'm not used to i'm not used to dealing pain I'm used to a neutral monotone.

Like they said, I'm either down or up.

either and i like to stay up don't and they're usually downs like a week or two later you know like like i'm used to staying up man and here i am man i and i i i i i'm just before my 10 years and i'm sitting there and and i and man i i can't put nothing in my body to to to change the way i was feeling man and and i have to walk through all these emotions like i i had to be sad

you know i had to i had to reflect about man all the good stuff man that went on with my mom's life man i don't cares about all that bad stuff that's how your perception is like you gotta you gotta figure out like you can either hold on to all these bad memories and all this stuff that went wrong, or you can just take all that good stuff out, man, and just hold on.

And I choose to hang on to all this good stuff that happened between us, man, all the, all the good stuff, man.

Like, how, how loving and caring she really was despite all the stuff that went on, you know, and, um, and, uh, and yeah, man, and just walked through it, man.

And it just makes you like, you know, you know, to this day, I love my mom, man, to this day.

Beautiful, dude.

Yeah.

Dude, you are one of the best storytellers I've ever met.

You had me tearing out the past 20 minutes.

Oh, my God, man.

You have no tissues up here, man.

And I don't have nothing to give you.

You've been holding them in.

Your guys should have brought you some tissues.

You've been holding them in.

Dude.

Your story is so inspiring.

I wonder what percentage of the people you went to prison with recovered and are at your level now.

You know what?

I love it, man.

And it's not about a level.

It's either you're on this side.

I was full on in.

When I was out there living the way I was living and disease of drug addiction and all that stuff,

I was fully invested.

Like it was, it didn't matter.

Like I was fully invested and I had to fully invest myself into this into this program.

Like there are half measures available.

This nothing that got me as a human being

to work for me.

I'm a true alcoholic, drug addict, you know,

anything to be in the moment now.

And

man, I fully invested.

my whole life

into this program and every day.

And it's not like something that you're like, oh, cool.

It's, it's, you know, that's all I can do.

It's, it's always, I can always do more.

Yeah.

That's a 12-step program.

That 12-step program, correct.

Stuff, right?

Yeah.

So it works.

Yeah, it does, man.

100%.

Recovery works, dude.

You know?

It's beautiful, man.

Dude, we got to make a movie for you or something for you.

Let's do it, man.

Let's do it.

I'm going to put you in touch with some producers.

Let's do it.

Let's do it.

What else you got going on next, man?

Where can people find you?

You can find me on my, yeah, man.

If you're on my, if you're on social media, you can find me, Garrett McLendon, on IG.

You know, Mindset Recovery, man, for the people who are out there

who are struggling or need help, man, reach out to me.

Let me know if there's something I can do for you, man.

I come from a place like this, and so I sort of,

you know, want to bring a place together to help people, you know?

You know?

Yeah, we're helping people.

Helping others, man.

Help others, help others, help others, man.

That's the goal, man.

Yeah, we'll link everything below.

Thanks for coming on, Garrett.

Thank you.

Yep, thanks for watching, guys.

See you tomorrow.