Ketamine Therapy, Importance of Spirituality and Finding your Soul Tribe I Tori Gordon DSH #363

And what I realized when I looked at our health care system, because I spent a lot of time in hospitals with unfortunately sick family members of mine, I realized like we don't really have a healthcare system.

We have a sick care system.

We have a disease management system.

We're putting people on medications for the rest of their lives that address symptoms, not the underlying root cause of these things.

Wherever you guys are watching this show, I would truly appreciate it if you follow or subscribe.

It helps a lot with the algorithm.

It helps us get bigger and better guests, and it helps us grow the team.

Truly means a lot.

Thank you guys for supporting.

And here's the episode.

Welcome back to the show, guys.

Got a great guest for you guys today, Tori Gordon.

How's it going?

Good.

Thanks for having me.

It's good to see you.

I know you're doing some really interesting stuff.

Can't wait to dive into the mental health, the psychedelics.

I want to start off with sort of your personal mental health journey and how that sort of started.

Yeah, I mean, it's definitely a a journey.

I think for me, I grew up in a very traditional, like, had a very traditional childhood and background.

I didn't start having mental health challenges or struggles till my mid, until my early 20s, mid-20s.

Oh, wow.

Yeah, so I was really fortunate.

But,

and I used to be, just to give you some context, like the girl that thought anxiety was like, not real.

Yeah, we all know someone like that.

Yeah, I was her.

I was like, are people just making this up?

Like, is this just an excuse to get out of doing things that they don't want to do?

Like, I don't understand until I experienced it for the first time.

Yeah.

And I remember it was

a regular day.

I was pulling up to a sales call and had to do a meeting.

And all of a sudden it was just flooded.

My body was flooded with anxiety.

And this feeling rushed over me of like, I have to get out of here.

Like, I don't want to do this.

I need to.

to leave.

And I was like, oh, that's what I'm experiencing.

So that was like this new awareness that I'd had never had before.

I remember another moment in my kind of mental health journey when I was living a life that looked absolutely beautiful on the outside.

I was living in a penthouse apartment.

I was dating a major league baseball player.

I was had the life that so many people

would have looked at and dreamed of.

And yet, one day I walked out of my condo and felt the sun on my face and burst into tears and realized, oh, something's not right.

Like I'm, I've been sheltered up in my apartment for two weeks and haven't seen anybody i think i might be depressed

and so those are a couple of the moments where i've had these awarenesses that there's something internally that doesn't match my external world and so for me i've been on this journey over the last like decade of like how do i build a life that feels as good as it looks right because i was somebody who had a life that looked really good but it didn't feel good and i did so much work work to try and curate my external world and control my external world and garner acknowledgement and achievement and accolades and all of that.

But it didn't satisfy or like fulfill the part of me that was suffering and that was longing to be, you know, dealt with.

And so, yeah, I think for me personally, I've struggled at different stages with depression and anxiety and PTSD and different things.

I've been through a lot in my life.

And now I'm really committed to finding tools and resources and having experiences that truly can transform my life and relieve me of the stress and the suffering that I'd experienced.

I love those.

And I feel like there's a lot of people dealing with that, to be honest.

Everybody.

I don't know anybody that's not

maybe a handful of people, but they are fully committed to that.

Like their lives are committed to that work.

You know what I mean?

And I think it takes a level of dedication and commitment to yourself

and to realizing like you deserve to have a life that feels good.

Like that you don't have to suffer.

You don't just have to accept that this is just how it's going to be forever.

And part of that, like

for me, has been realizing like the diagnosis is I was diagnosed with ADHD at 26.

I was diagnosed with depression after my mom and my sister passed away.

dealt with anxiety, dealt with different things.

And part of me didn't want to just accept a diagnosis and be like this is who I am now this is my identity this is something I'm always going to struggle with instead I went to work figuring out how can I deal with the root cause of why I'm feeling this way so that I can actually heal instead of just having to take a pill the rest of my life and so you're saying root cause that's more holistic so you believe mental health can be treated holistically for sure I think you know

people go through different do you guys spend a lot of time or money or both on food, especially cooking and ordering delivery?

Well, look no further than Factor, guys.

Factor's got delicious, ready-to-eat meals that you could cook in just two minutes.

They got over 35 different options to choose from every week.

They got Calorie Smart, Protein Plus, and Keto.

They got what you need for your diet.

They got over 60 add-ons to help you stay fueled, feeling good all day.

What are you waiting for, guys?

Get started and get after your goals.

Restaurant quality food, guys.

I've had quite a few meals.

I've tried other meal prep companies.

Factor is actually my favorite by far.

The taste, the flavoring, the spices, all top quality.

They got breakfast, they got midday bites, whatever you need.

No prepping, cooking, or cleanup needed.

This is huge, guys, but you just throw it in the microwave for two minutes and you can eat right there.

You can pause or reschedule your deliveries anytime.

So it's the perfect solution if you're looking for something fast, something premium with no cooking required.

They've also done the math.

It's cheaper than takeout and it's dietitian-approved to be nutritious and delicious.

Head to factormeals.com/slash DSH50 for 50% off.

50 at factormeals.com slash DSH 50.

Stages of what works for them at their like different stages of their life.

And there was definitely a period of times where I was on antidepressant and anti-anxiety medication and that worked for me.

I was on

ADHD medication for a long period of time.

That worked for me until it didn't.

I was on hormonal birth control for a long time.

Worked for me for a while until it didn't.

And then I had to re

like negotiate what works for me me and what are the alternatives.

And what I realized when I looked at our healthcare system, because I spent a lot of time in hospitals with unfortunately sick family members of mine, I realized like we don't really have a healthcare system.

We have a sick care system.

We have a disease management system.

We're putting people on medications for the rest of their lives that address symptoms, not the underco.

lying root cause of these things.

And so, and I'm not telling people how to live their journey or their life, but for me, I was like, I need to understand

what's really going on underneath the surface.

And so there was a point in my life where I was just like, I don't want to be dependent on these medications forever.

Some of them change my personality.

Some of them have terrible side effects.

So what are my alternatives?

And most of us don't even get to that question.

We're like, oh, we just accept this for truth.

What I would encourage people to do is like

open up the possibility of like, is there another way?

Is there something else that I can do to experience the freedom or the feeling or the relief that I'm trying to feel?

Which most of us go to all different types of things to feel better.

Because, yeah, like we said, I don't know many people who aren't suffering in some way or in some form.

And we're all using a lot of different things to cope with that.

Yeah.

No, pretty much everyone I talk to.

I can't even think of someone that hasn't dealt with it in the past, mental health stuff.

Yeah, yeah.

It's, it's like,

and what I also realized is like

in order to have the life that feels really fulfilling and feels really good for me, like I can't be at peace in my life if I'm at war in my mind all the time.

That's deep.

And I was like constantly at war, like

with my circumstances, with my past, with things that had happened.

And what I didn't realize is that I was like in resistance to the way life was a lot.

And I was always trying to change something, fix something.

I was the girl that's like, I can always be better.

And so I was never in acceptance of my life.

It was like, this is wrong.

How do I make this better?

How do I get to this next level?

etc.

And that gave me this energy of like actually resisting life versus embracing it and accepting it for what it is.

And I don't feel like

I think that internally creates this conflict in inside.

If you're always trying to get to the next thing, you're never happy where you are.

There's like this gap.

And so I've really had to find through like meditation and breath work and psychedelics and other alternatives, like ways to be okay with how my life is right now.

Living in the moment.

Yeah.

Even if it's not ideal, it doesn't mean it's perfect, right?

It doesn't mean that I have everything figured out, but can I be okay with this stage?

Can I be okay with this season?

Can I be okay

with being in the middle?

Not being where I thought I, you know, not being where I was, but I'm not where I want to be.

I'm somewhere in the middle.

Can I be okay with that too?

It's tough to live in the moment.

I think people either live in the past or the future.

Most, yeah.

I'd say very few people are in the present.

Yeah.

You could tell when you're talking to people.

Fully.

And, you know, I did a talk on this recently.

You spoke at the same conference, and I don't know if you stuck around or if you were there for it, but I talked a lot about heart-led leadership and part of getting out of our heads and leading with our heart and what that looks like.

And you were just talking about being in the present moment.

Like I feel in order to have real connection with people, like presence is a

prerequisite for that.

For sure.

You have to be here.

And I have to be here.

And we have to both choose to be in this moment together to create something.

Yeah.

Otherwise, we've missed it.

Yeah, you could tell when people are thinking about other stuff when you're talking to them.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And so for me, it's, I used to be really fast-paced.

How do I get more done?

How do I cram as much stuff into the day?

How do I get to the next, the next job, the next opportunity, the next whatever?

Are you interested in coming on the digital social hour podcast as a guest?

Well, click the application link below in the description of this video.

We are always looking for cool stories, cool entrepreneurs to talk to about business and life.

Click the application link below and here's the episode, guys.

And I was missing out on so much of the fulfilling parts of my life.

And I was like, how do I actually just slow down and be where I am and see that actually there's, this is where the magic is.

Like the fulfillment, the joy, the peace.

It's not out there in the getting and accumulation of things.

It's here.

Right.

And I've just been missing it.

Yeah.

Yeah, man.

Robert Edward Grant was just talking about living in the present as well.

Yeah.

It's something people don't really think about, but that mind switch is really impactful once you do do that.

Yeah.

I use, so I wear this necklace because

it helps me.

It's like a, just like a little reminder, but it also is like, I breathe through it.

So I exhale, inhale through my nose, exhale through this, and it's by a company called Comisso Design.

It's, they're really dope.

But it's just like this gentle reminder that like

when you become aware of your breath, you become aware of your life.

It's like the thing that we do first when we come into this world and last thing we before we exit.

And then most of us forget about breathing in between.

But it's like, as soon as I become aware of my breath, it's like I've entered this moment.

I've just arrived

here in the body, in the moment.

And when I can do that and when I can practice that regularly, that's when I open up to the life that's present and alive around me versus

being in a relationship, not with the present moment, not with you, not with whoever I'm with.

I'm in a relationship with my mind.

Otherwise,

an idea of the future or an idea of the past.

I'm not actually in a relationship with life.

Yeah, you could get in your own head easily.

Totally.

Yeah.

So for me, it's also about like, how do I create practices and things in my life that help me get out of my head?

Yeah.

Breath works so important.

I mean, I do it every day, and the days I don't, I notice it.

Night and day.

It's like a, for me, it's sort of like a

walking meditation or I'm walking prayer.

It's like, I think we think breath work has to be like very,

I have to take time, I have to sit, I have to breathe.

And that's great.

And you can access some really amazing states like that.

But also if you're just in the car, literally last night, I got really overwhelmed.

And I typically don't do that.

It takes a lot to like shake me.

Yeah.

Shake me up.

And for whatever reason, something like really shook me up.

And I was having like this intense reaction.

Like my body was kind of shaking.

And I immediately just started breathing.

I was like, this is the way back home.

This is the way back to the moment.

This is the way back to my body.

And ultimately safety.

Like that's, I'm having this panic in my body and in my mind.

And my mind's racing to the future or to the past.

Like that's what anxiety is.

It's like.

because we've left the moment and how do we return back?

And one of the things I say about anxiety, too, it's like, it's like a little kid on the playground.

Okay.

So

if you're a parent and your kid wanders off a little too far, you're like, hey, baby, come back over here where I can see you.

You've gone a little too far.

Right.

I feel like that's what anxiety is.

When you start to feel anxious, it's like your body and your mind is saying, hey, baby, you've wandered a little too far off from the present moment.

Come back.

Come back over here.

You're too far off, and that's why you're like off into the future.

That's true.

And it's saying, Can you just come back here where life is being lived where it's safe?

Because it starts to feel unsafe when we're like thinking of all the worst-case scenarios and things that could go wrong.

Yeah, in the future.

That's so true.

I love that.

Yeah.

I want to talk about soul tribes.

You talk about soul tribes a lot.

What exactly is a soul tribe?

Soul tribe.

Yeah.

I think it's a community of people

that

you can show up and be part of and take part in that

is an environment in which you feel really safe and where you feel like you feel like you're welcome to be your full self.

I think in our culture, we wear a lot of masks.

For sure.

We play a lot of roles.

We're taught really young, like, who do I need to be in order to be accepted and loved and belong and fit in and be cool?

And

I lived that way for a really long time.

And it, and I really cared about what people thought.

Same.

And I still do to some degree.

Like it's nice to be.

It's natural, right?

It's absolutely natural.

But when I had to start contorting and changing who I was to fit in, that felt really inauthentic to me.

So I think a soul tribe is

a collection of people, however many, that have like-minded value, similar values to you, similar goals and vision, but also more than anything, it's just like really safe for you to be all that you are and that you don't only have to be a certain version like you don't have to just be podcasting sean like you can be at home sean you can be nerd sean you can be whatever sean all the versions it's like we love you for you not for what you do for us right yeah you're just yourself not worried about any judgment yeah real friends yeah and what's sad is i don't think that many people have that in their life definitely not i just remember my high school days i was just putting on a show yeah what was that like for you like trying to fit in you know that wasn't me at all though have you found do you feel like you found your people yes but it's not a lot

maybe

two really but yeah it's it's hard for sure it's been a journey for me too i think like

it's required me to walk away from a lot of people that aren't my people or just like not even that they're not my people that sounds wrong it's more like i just either outgrew or we had different priorities or different values or whatever

and there was definitely periods of time where i was like pretty lonely um

but since i came out to vegas and this is something i see and really admire about you too

is

is trying to find

real raw genuine people and i found that here um but i also feel like you get what you put out for sure you know what i mean and i you attract kind of what you are and I've come to a place in my life where like I have a standard for like this is how I'm gonna show up and I hope that the people that I attract and bring into my world are a reflection of the authenticity that I show and that I bring and yeah and

I think that's where it starts it's like you can't affect who who's around you can't like

you don't know who you're gonna meet today you don't know if you're gonna meet your best friend like you could have possibly not met your best friend or the person you're gonna be with or whatever but

you get to decide how you're going to show up.

And if you're going to wear the mask or play the game, or if you're just going to be truly who you are and see where the cards kind of fall.

If people walk out of your life or you're not longer align with them because you're being your honest, authentic self, then they're not your people.

Outgrowing is a common issue I see in the entrepreneurial space, especially when people achieve success.

They just, I think they're growing at a pace too quickly for their old friends.

Yeah.

Have you experienced that?

Totally.

Yeah, it's interesting.

I definitely did, especially when I was early on in my business, some of my closest friends, and they've now, one specifically I can think of, has come to me and said, your growth threatened, made me feel threatened.

It felt like you were leaving me behind and that was scary.

And

I showed that in really immature ways, basically.

But

sometimes your pursuit of your goals and your excellence and your highest self shows and mirrors to people where they're not kind of showing up for themselves.

And that can be triggering.

Wow.

Yeah.

I never thought of it that way, but that's so true because now it's their insecurities being projected onto you

because they didn't achieve what they wanted to.

Right.

So I see this a lot of times with my clients or like

when

kids are, you know,

going after their dreams and their parents are like, no, stay, do the thing because their parents were afraid to take the leap and take the risk and do the and they've sacrificed their own goals and dreams for a life that they've just accepted

and so when you refuse to do that it can bring up things for people where they have to acknowledge that within themselves yeah that's something we got to be cognizant of if we have kids because my parents wanted me to go to college and get a job and all that but that was They were just teaching what they thought was best, I guess.

Of course.

Well, and I think a lot, you know, it's what they think is best and what they think is going to keep you safe.

And it's like, we're, we as human beings, we want guarantees.

Yeah.

We want certainty naturally because it creates safety.

We think if it's predictable, if I know you're going to go on this path and then you're going to get this job and you're going to go to this school,

that feels predictable.

That feels like a certain, certain outcome.

And therefore, we feel safe and that you're going to be okay.

And when you start to take a different path, whether it's your parents or your friends or your partner, whoever, that feels uncertain, which is inherently risky.

Right.

And threatening to the potential unit or whatever.

It's like, well, what happens if you take this path?

Yeah.

And

I think ultimately it comes all down to our fear, which is, am I going to be okay?

Yeah.

Are you going to be okay?

And

going back to the conversation about anxiety and mental health,

I think as long as we live with a belief that we're not going to be okay,

like if I go for this, if I allow myself to be vulnerable, if I speak from my heart, if I try this new thing,

if I believe that I'm not going to be okay, I'm always going to live with a level of anxiety.

But what if I like actually trusted and believe like it's going to be like no matter what happens, I'm going to be okay.

I'm not going to die.

Yeah.

If I like go for this, if I tell this girl I like her, if I,

you know,

whatever it might be, it's the brain that's like, no, no, no, that's a threat.

Don't do that.

Yeah, because even if you fail, you're still learning.

Yeah.

It's not like, like you said, you're going to die.

And can we practice learning to be okay with the uncomfortable feelings of growth?

Yeah.

Because I don't know anybody that's grown without getting uncomfortable and stepping into the unknown.

Definitely not.

You believe that everyone has to go through hard challenges to grow, right?

Yeah.

I mean, it's like resistance training.

You don't grow a muscle without using it.

Yeah.

You know what I mean?

You have to stretch.

You have to put some pressure on yourself at times.

And

there's nothing good that comes from like not putting in effort and not trying.

And I'm not saying everything has to be hard.

Like I used to like think that life had to be hard for me to be successful

Because I'd seen my parents struggle.

I'd seen them work three plus jobs and travel and do all these things to make, you know, we were a middle class family, but like I had subconsciously started to believe like I have to create some hardship for myself in order to either be deserving or worthy of the success I got.

So I do think you have to come.

up against some challenges, but at the same time, it's like

I now subscribe to a different kind of belief system that I can still, I can do it with ease.

Like I don't have to create pain for myself.

That's so relatable.

I used to, if I wasn't working hard, I would get anxiety because I believe that too.

I saw my parents working two jobs each and I thought you just had to work long hours every day to be successful, honestly.

Yeah.

And when you, and I had to kind of ask myself, like, do I.

Do I want that to be a belief?

Like, what does that do for me?

Because there's a cost and there's a payoff.

Like, I get to feel

significant significant or proud of myself because I work hard.

Like that's, that's nice and that's good.

But am I sacrificing other areas of my life for that?

And is there a way to have both?

Yeah.

I used to sacrifice everything for hard work, health, friendships, family.

And what was the motivating driver for you?

That's a good question.

I mean, at the time, it was just to prove people wrong, I think.

Because there was a lot of doubt those first few years.

Family doubted me.

Friends doubted me.

Everyone did.

Then it became money, but now it's shifting, I'd say.

Now it's more real purpose.

Like I really feel good about this podcast, and I'm not just doing it for money,

which is honestly the best I've ever felt.

Yeah.

I mean, that's, and that's like a powerful journey.

And I think a lot of people go through that.

It's like this elevation of consciousness so much.

It's like we focus.

on the I initially, our own pain.

Like, oh, people are doubting.

I don't want to be in this situation.

I don't want to be poor.

I don't want to be be broke.

I don't want to be rejected.

I don't want girls to think I'm lame, whatever it is.

And so we focus on the I.

How do I fix my problem that I perceive that I have versus, and then you fix that?

And you're like, oh, now people aren't doubting me.

I don't have as many haters things I've proved to them.

And so now I'm doing this for a different purpose.

And then it's, it's like for me, it was the same thing with my journey.

It was like, I was focusing on getting out of my pain.

Then I realized and elevated to a place of like,

how does this affect we, not just it's me and we, to the, like, all of us, to what you were talking about, like purpose.

Now you're stepping into purpose of like, how can I give?

How can I explore this thing that feels really fulfilling and deeply meaningful versus how can I prove something or what I'm here to perform so that you think X of me or like that you like me or that you,

you know,

approve versus I'm doing this because this is just feels really authentic and true for me.

It feels amazing.

Yeah.

Being able to get these messages out there.

I mean, it really does feel like you and I as podcasters are changing lives.

I don't think we'll ever be able to quantify

the impact that we make.

And specifically you, like you've got an enormous audience.

And I just want to like genuinely like speak this into your life.

Like you're making a massive difference.

And you'll never know the implications of what that means and the waves that that continues to touch people's lives.

because somebody could listen to a show that you do and take one thing that you said and implement it or go out and read a book or go out and then work with this person or whoever like it opens their mind up to a possibility

and that's the thing that changes everything for them and i say that because i am byproduct of that

like

I heard something on a podcast at a time in my life, I needed to hear it.

Wow.

And my life changed.

That's awesome.

It opened me up to this whole world that I now work and live in.

But at the time, I was just seeking and searching for

something that felt tangible and substantive and that it could actually possibly help me.

I was desperate.

Yeah.

And I heard something on a podcast and

then.

I ended up working with that person and going on a retreat and finding breath work.

And then I got facilitator.

Like I got, you know, my facilitator license.

and then now I have a whole business because of something amazing that happened on a podcast and that's what you're doing every day yeah what was that retreat was that a silent retreat it wasn't it was um

it was sort of like a healing somatic healing retreat so I went out to Maui and traveled alone

I had never done anything like this before um I didn't really know what to expect I was just in a like desperate place.

I was like, I gotta do something different.

And

that was where I first got in touch with my like, my grief and my anger.

It was the first place I experienced breath work and I felt my own body and my own, like, all of this power that was in me.

I was like my ability to experience altered states of consciousness without drugs, without anything else.

It's like, this is my breath.

It opened me up to

a whole new world of

potential and perspective shifts about like how I saw my life and my future and my past.

And after that,

that retreat,

I ended up quitting my corporate job and starting my podcast and starting my business.

It was, I had experienced so much relief and freedom.

I knew then I'd tapped into something and I was like,

I will spend the rest of my life telling people about this.

Incredible.

Since then, you've experimented with other meditations, plant medicines.

Walk me through some of those.

Yeah, so it started with the journey like home to myself and my power started with like yoga and breath work and meditation.

Those were kind of my like entry-level things, which I still practice and they're fundamental to me.

Um, yoga helped me get back into my body and feel the subtleties of the way I was like holding and contracting and like holding tension in my body at different in different ways.

Yeah,

breath worked helped me to get out of my head and into my like feel again.

So it started there and then I would baby step.

I was also very afraid of any psychedelic, grew up religious, so I was like very judgmental and

very straight-laced.

But it eventually evolved into me hearing about like getting in these circles, hearing about other people's transformations, their experience.

So plant medicine came on my radar a couple years ago and I worked with a shaman and therapists in tandem to do some deep psilocybin work, which was transformational.

Nice.

Most recently, I started working with a holistic psychiatrist, which is really interesting because you don't hear about any of those.

And there's a man named Dr.

Sam Zan who now are partnered because his work is so

transformational.

It's really raising the

standard of care.

psychiatry and he's helping people to get off medication through holistic remedies and also also psychedelic therapy.

He is a professor of psychedelic medicine in UNLV.

You should have him on your show.

He's a good idea.

Yeah, I'd love to.

Yeah.

So we

are,

he took me through ketamine therapy most recently, and that's been really transformational for me as well.

Just really understanding the mind and how we get programmed into these patterns and these belief systems, these cycles that we just keep repeating over and over.

And because I realized a lot of the quote unquote pain or suffering I had was a byproduct of just something from my, I just was like repeating a pattern.

I was like trying to protect myself or I was trying to control a situation, whatever.

And so, plant medicine and psychedelics has been really beautiful in helping me to reprogram some of that.

Yeah.

So,

so ketamine and psychedelics, including yeah, the MDMA and insilocybin, have been extra

powerful.

I'm going to look into that ketamine one.

So, is it like a micro dose or are you fully?

Yeah, good question.

So, it's a full therapeutic dose.

So, actually if you they have a um this company's called anywhere clinic uh it's a telehealth psychiatric platform that offers also ketamine and here in vegas it's called calm clinic um

so basically i've been doing at-home ketamine therapy which you get a prescription it's fully legal there's no like wow yeah i didn't know it was legal yeah

and I got a prescription you give get these lozenges and it's depending on the dose you go up but it starts around 50 to 100 milligrams and goes up can go up to like 400 milligrams at the high dose, high range.

And it's what they consider and call a medicine-assisted meditation.

Okay.

So ketamine is, it's different than like psilocybin, magic mushrooms, other psychedelics, ayahuasca, which is very, there might be a big purge, there are some really intense, you're really experiencing some maybe out-of-body experiences,

hallucinations.

This is more of a,

in my experience,

a very deep meditation.

Ketamine is a dissociative drug.

So it, you sort of

disassociate a bit from your body.

You don't feel as pain, like pain.

At high doses of ketamine, it's used as an anesthetic.

Oh, wow.

Yeah, for anesthesia.

So we're not.

going that far with it by any means

but um

you're able to allow your subconscious mind in meditation because you have like an eye mask on.

And you're just, I'm at home in my bed with headphones, an eye mask in a very relaxed, safe environment.

Wow.

I would do this.

Yeah.

See, when I think of psychedelics, I think of like hallucinating.

So I'm like literally laying in my bed with an eye mask and headphones.

And prior to the session, I just.

you know, I like to set up my room very vibey.

I get into the mood.

I like write some intentions, kind of journal a little bit about where I am, what I'm hoping to get out of the session.

And then I do some breath work.

If you've ever heard of Wim Hoff, I typically do Wim Hof and then I take the medication, allow it, it's a lozen, so it dissolves in my mouth, hold it for 15 minutes and I spit it out.

And then I'm in a very relaxed state at that point.

And what happens is your subconscious mind kind of bubbles to the surface and sort of brings you just like what you need.

For me, the first time,

the first time I I experienced it I experienced in two ways one it was like a genie in a bottle I had this awareness which I'd had before but kind of mean really solidified this is like I am a genie in a bottle and what I mean by that is the medicine helped me to come out of the bottle I could feel my the

expansiveness of my being like Tori as a spiritual being

which is not just this body and this this personality, it's like my essence

came up.

It was like, I'm connected to all things.

I can, I feel my enormous, like how big I am, how powerful I am, how much of a creative force I am, that I'm connected to all of life and that I'm not separate.

I'm not alone.

Like I'm one.

It was that oneness feeling.

And

when I came out of the meditation, it was like,

I fit back into the bottle,

which is my body and my personality.

But I still had that awareness of like, I am, I'm not alone.

I'm connected and I'm, I'm okay.

And that gives me a sense of okay.

That's cool.

It gives me a sense of

I'm not out here fending for myself and I can

really f up.

And it's all up to me.

And then the other perspective it gave me

is

sort of like that life is a coin.

And what I mean by that is when before the session, I entered and I was seeing and perceiving my life, my situation, my circumstance, my relationships from a certain point of view,

as if I was like looking at it from tails.

And then the ketamine in the session actually flipped that coin over and I could see it from a different, I was like seeing it from heads, like almost like right side up.

Or like I was, or my perspective like got shifted and I was like, before I was turned upside down and now I was right side up and I could see things clearly.

I could

have a whole different perspective and vantage point on my situation.

And it was from a place of love and not fear and anxiety and stress.

It was from just a deep sense of peace.

Super cool.

I just did hypnosis therapy with Dom the Hypnotist.

Okay, I've been hearing about this guy.

Yeah.

I haven't met him yet.

It actually sounds similar to this because he brings your subconscious forward.

So your subconscious is talking to him and he's reprogramming all your traumas.

Wow.

How is that for you?

Oh, great.

So the first time it worked a little bit, but then he told me I need to open up my throat chakra more because it was pretty close.

So he had me just start singing every day, like in the car in the shower.

And that actually opened it up.

So two weeks later, we did another session and it worked amazing.

Amazing.

It's really cool.

I would love to do that.

Yeah, the subconscious mind is so powerful.

And I heard someone one time talk about

it in the sense that like

your conscious mind is like

the room in the house if you're in a house it's the room in your house that you're in with the lights are on yeah like that's your conscious mind it's like everything you can see in this room it's lights and you're like oh i can bring my awareness to anything in this room

and then they describe the subconscious mind as like all of the rooms that you've been in in the house that you could enter into if you wanted to.

It's like, I could go there.

I could bring that memory up.

I could choose to walk in this room or that room or whatever.

Yeah.

And then the unconscious mind is like all the rooms you've never been in and everything around the property.

Wow.

And everything else.

That's like the Akashic Records.

Yes.

And

so it's powerful to be able to access those alternate rooms and see what's in there and kind of look around and become aware of like, oh, I didn't know that this is actually affecting my behavior or the way I feel.

Absolutely.

Tor, it's been a pleasure.

Anything you want to close off with or promote?

You know, I think the biggest thing thing is just encouraging people to recognize that there are alternative modalities and ways that you can find relief and healing and peace and joy in your life.

And you can actually build a life that feels as good as it looks, but it requires you to say yes to that, to become open to that possibility.

And if you're curious about what that looks like, obviously please connect with me online.

You can find me at the Tori Gordon on all social media platforms and also on the Coachable podcast where we talk about a lot of stuff like this.

Love it.

Thanks so much for coming on, Tori.

Thanks for having me.

Thanks for watching, as always, guys, and I'll see you tomorrow.