Spurs stumble past United and Liverpool keep on keeping on: Football Weekly

1h 1m
Max Rushden is joined by Barry Glendenning, Will Unwin and Seb Hutchinson to discuss all the weekend’s Premier League games. Help support our independent journalism at theguardian.com/footballweeklypod

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Hello, and welcome to the Guardian Football Weekly.

Give the people what they want, an amazing opportunity to talk about two lower mid-table teams at the same time.

That's not that impressive Spurs beat not that impressive Manchester United.

The prize, a chance to transfer their injury crisis to Old Trafford.

Liverpool keep on keeping on.

Apache win over Wolves, in which they didn't have a shot on target in the second half, but they did enough.

Some classic sign of a good team stuff here.

Omar Mahmoud scores a 15-minute hat-trick.

Great news for headline writers who can write about pharaohs and Egyptian kings instead of Nordic cyborgs for a bit.

Thank you, Mikel Arteta, for bringing back the auxiliary striker Paul Warhurst fans dancing in the streets after Mikel Marino's surprising brace.

They have Caro Matoma dragging the ball out of the sky like Berbatov.

Some more end product from Adama Triore and Betto, the ice cold killer.

Also, today, the Gary Monk era at Cambridge is over.

Dude Bellingham gives us a great chance to describe the difference between off and you.

We'll take your questions, and that's today's Guardian Football Weekly.

On the panel today, tempted to say F off to the first panelist, but I won't do that.

Welcome, Will Unwin.

How are you?

Fuck off, Max.

Oh, thank you so much.

There it is.

I suppose.

I suppose if you're given an open goal like that, Will, you've got to take it.

Seb Hutchinson, hello.

Is that different from fuck you?

I've just asked you Belly.

You try it when he introduces you.

Okay.

Hello.

Hello, Seb, and welcome, Barry Glendenning.

Hi, Max.

And apologies to the kids for the potty way this podcast has begun.

Let's start then at the Tottenham Hotspur Stadium.

We know you all wanted us to.

Tirabe says, is this what happens when a resistible force meets a movable object?

Pudzy says, never mind Dr.

Tottenham or even Mr.

Tottenham.

I don't even think Emeritus Professor Tottenham can help United Seb.

Were you there, Seb?

You were covering the game.

How did you find it?

Well, let me just get this straight.

Okay, so on Friday, we had two sides chasing Europe.

Is that fair to say?

Saturday, we had a title challenger against a side fighting in the relegation battle.

We had a London Derby.

We had a South Coast Derby, not the South Coast Derby, obviously.

We had the reigning champions in action.

We had Fulham and Forest, two of the most impressive sides this season, Forest in the Champions League places.

We had a Europe chasing side against a side fighting relegation we had crystal palace and everton which i enjoyed with my most enjoyable game of the weekend and we had the league leaders against a side fighting relegation but I thought Jed Spence played quite well actually and for me he was the man of the match

and James Madison shut up some people well I listen I did put it to the WhatsApp group what do we leave it was difficult Barry wasn't it wasn't a weekend of like huge stories and I and and as you said our commitment to the bit means that this is this is where we begin yeah we have to lead with this i think because i get that if this was a

not brilliant scrappy 1-0 crystal palace win over i don't know i'm going to offend somebody else here

Brentford.

We knew that was coming.

We had a passing mention at the end of the pod before we moved on to any other business.

But I firmly believe that our commitment to the bit means we have to cover this

I read

a lot of scathing criticism of this as a game an event I thought it was all right I thought it was decent enough two struggling teams desperate for a win and

Spurs edged it just about because I think they took one of their chances and I think they had far fewer chances than Manchester United but they took one of their chances and United didn't take any of theirs and I suppose that's what football is all about, isn't it?

It's a results business and Spurs got one.

Spurs come into this game.

They welcome back five players, three on the bench, Vicario and James Madison in the starting lineup.

Manchester United were forced to put

eight teenagers who'd never played senior football before on their bench alongside Victor Lindelof, prompting Barney, I think it was, to describe it as

some very well-behaved children on a on a school outing.

Yes, an A-level geography field trip waiting for the train to Lyme Regis.

You do wonder if Victor Lindelof was saying, and what do the kids do these days?

Tell me about these things.

Grandad sitting there.

It's interesting, Barry, I guess,

that just

feels like in a week that this terrible injury crisis at Spurs has just...

is now at Old Trafford.

Yeah, I think it was a combination of injury and illness.

I don't know what the illness was, if it was just a bug going through the camp or whatever.

But I think when you see Casemiro in the starting lineup, you know that there are problems and he was a conspicuously weak link for them, having not played, I think, since November.

And that was a dreadful performance when he and Christian Erickson were sort of Manchester United's midfield.

But

I thought,

you know, it wasn't a brilliant game, but I thought Manchester United created quite a few chances.

Garnacho missed a very easy one.

He was denied by two or three fairly decent Vicario saves.

Xerxe missed a very good opportunity to head United level.

I think they might have had a penalty for a blatant shove on Casemiro in the box by Jed Spence.

But apparently, shoves aren't punishable fouls anymore because there's never enough on it to give a penalty or a free kick or whatever.

Spurs didn't have quite as many chances, but some very slack Manchester United defending allowed Madison to score on the follow-up from a Bergval shot.

And that was enough for Tottenham to win the game.

And their fans had a pre-match protest and a post-match protest.

We all know they're very, they don't like Daniel Levy already, so I'm not sure quite sure what maybe I suppose they hammered home that point and we're I'm talking about it now, so that's something

the problem with those protests is Tottenham Hotspur don't love their fans as much as their fans love Tottenham Hotspur and that's the problem with a lot of clubs

I mean I guess the story will was going to be always about which team lost to this game um and I agree with Barry I think Metro United were unlucky to come away with nothing but they did come away with nothing especially considering you know they had they had no adults lindeloff aside on the bench to to to change the game

but there will still be questions about ruben amrim we have loads of them you know adam saying notwithstanding the mess at the club from top to bottom is it at all possible that ruben amarim is not the elite manager everyone would have us believe bobby saying is amarim making ten hog sacking look like a mistake clearly it's too early to tell

and yet the questions remain I was quite disappointed he didn't put the 63-year-old goalkeeping coach on the bench like he threatened to earlier this season ahead of Marcus Rashford.

Yeah,

we talk about having massive injury problems, and Spurs went through it, and didn't change, and it didn't go very well.

United have got massive injury problems and haven't changed formation, structure.

They've put Casimir in and managed to somehow finish 90 minutes alongside Brunei Founders, who doesn't fit into that role.

Zerksi didn't really fit into his role.

And this is the problem.

And no one's come off the bench, obviously.

And, you know, that's problematic.

But they're just not adapting.

Amarin's come in.

It's it's clear that the squad doesn't suit what he wants to do so therefore what he has to do, especially with limited funds, they signed Dorgu and Aiden Heaven in January, which is fine, but they're not going to change your team.

So he has to get through to the end of the season with Manchester United in a better position than he found them.

But he's just putting them in a worse position.

by sticking to his philosophy, which is great, and I won't go back to natural wines.

But

it's not good.

The performances aren't good.

You know, yeah, you can argue that a clinical striker might have made a difference against Tottenham, but the players just aren't cohesive enough.

They aren't learning the roles quickly enough, mainly because they can't play them, they're not suited to it.

And on Friday, he was explaining how they need to sell before they can buy, but they don't have any assets to sell.

That really Maynu, Galachio, who they really need to keep,

you know, Delict, Maguire,

I mean, Casimiro, numerous ones that just aren't really worth what is required.

So if he doesn't change tact, they're just going to end up in 15th or 16th, and that's the way it's going.

And I can't see how a coach can only have one style of play and claim to be at the top of the game.

And I think Amberin's good.

I like him.

I like his honesty.

If you don't have a plan B when things are going badly, then you probably need to look at yourself.

I've said the other week, Guadiola adapts to the situation.

He's not always had a Harland.

He's not always had a fullback.

You know, he moves in between having fullbacks and not, and you change the circumstance.

Yeah, sorry.

If you think about, you know, 011, 09 or 11 Barcelona compared to City, right?

They're just totally different, physically, totally different things.

And it's interesting about Amrim.

And I get, is the idea, Seb, that...

Over this process of this agony that Man United are going through, that maybe some of those players he will see do fit into the system or learn how to play the system so that come next season, it's almost like everybody, you've just got to write this off.

It's going to be 15th or 13th or 17th or whatever.

They won't go down.

But that is more sensible than just trying to come 11th or 9th and play with the back four and not impose this system on the team.

I think Angel Posta Koglu touched on this actually before the match because he said Amarim needs time.

And I think Amarim maybe believes he's going to get time because of where they are in the table.

And also, I think that's exactly what he's doing.

I think he's playing this system over and over again to find out about his players and the character, their mentality.

I actually thought yesterday, Bruno Fernandez, the work he got through and what he was being asked to do was

quite immense, really.

He put in

an incredible shift.

He was blowing out of his proverbial

a lot of the game, but he was working hard.

He had the most crosses in the game.

He had the most touches in the game.

That's for either side.

He won the most tackles.

He created the most chances from a Manchester United point of view.

He managed to get into the final third more than anybody else.

And I know he's got the sporting links himself, but I think that's part of it.

He's looking at players' character, which is why, obviously, Rashford's not there anymore, which is why Sancho probably may not come back, which is why Anthony is away from the club, although he seems to be doing pretty well.

It's part of growth as a manager, I think, to look at your squad and break them down.

And if you look around, around, managers that have been given that time, think of Arteta and where he was, to work out your squad and slowly build a squad that you want.

I think Ten Hag tried to do it, and he would probably still argue he wasn't quite given enough time, but it's the nature of the Manchester United beast.

But maybe to give him the benefit of the doubt, that is what's going on.

Because otherwise, as Will said, it's pretty mad.

It is funny that Anthony's having this wonderful time at Bettis.

Is it Betters?

He's at?

And

Rashford actually looks like, when we get onto Villa, looks like a different player.

Could they recall Rashford?

I don't know what the rules are, but you know, like looking at that bench, they can't because I mean, the bench

was mad for them, wasn't it?

From a Tottenham point of view, it's just right.

I think a lot's been made there about the fact that they haven't won any games like this.

Like they just don't win games 1-0 that aren't good, where they just about dig it out.

They've done two in a row now, the Brentford game, okay, they won 2-0.

But that's sort of two stodgy,

dirty, grim wins, which in many ways might be the wins that Tottenham most need.

Well, any win's a good win when you're in the position Tottenham are at the minute.

I still maintain they were quite lucky to win this game, and it

could easily have lost it with better finishing from United, but win it they did.

And

I reckon Andrew Postakoglu is super relieved.

There's a period there where the camera cut away to Amarim, who was just sitting on his seat in the dugout, staring mournfully at the floor for just a really long time.

And I'd love to know what was going through his mind at that time.

I think it's important to remember he didn't want this job when he got it.

He wanted it at the end of the season.

He wanted a full preseason.

But he was railroaded into taking it.

I suspect he may be questioning the wisdom of that decision now because I don't think he'd bargained for United being quite the bin fire it is when he got there but if that's the case that's on him because he should have done his due diligence and I don't think he's in any danger of losing his job I don't think he will resign but I'd say the thought has crossed his mind put it that way

just another nice bit of Barney saying it was genuinely entertaining watching Bergwell repeatedly skip around Casemiro in central midfield a spectacle with its own kind of mismatched grace like one of those strip become dancing pairings where some twirling professionalist teamed up with a 25-stone middle-aged newsreader.

I did enjoy that.

Charlie says, how spurs would it be to beat United three times in a season and to somehow lose to them in the inevitable Europa League final?

You could see it happening a mile off.

Let's go to Anfield.

Liverpool two Wolves won.

I guess will Liverpool win a match during their blip, right?

We had the Plymouth defeat, obviously with the reserve side, the draw at Everton.

They were not convincing.

They didn't have a shot.

in the second half on target, which is a first in their Premier League history at Anfield, I think.

I think they didn't have a shot at all in the second half.

They never shot at all.

It's the first time in eight years that's happened to Liverpool.

But, you know, it's a sign of a good team, Brian, isn't it, Will,

that you win games when you're not playing well?

Yeah, that's it.

No team wins the league by having 38 perfect performances.

And the difference yesterday was Salah again.

I mean, he doesn't get the assist for the first, but he's in there at the right time.

He gets it in the direction of Louis Diaz, he bundles it in sort of glorious summer league style.

Has a goal ever been more bundled?

I don't know.

That's a different podcast, isn't it, Max?

Yeah.

Yeah, no, you're right.

Morning, Adam.

But yeah, and then Salah takes a penalty cool as possible.

Sort of writing about this last week, but yeah, teams win leagues, but you need your top-class players to pull it out of the bag in these games where it's very, very tight.

And Salah has done it repeatedly, you know, nine times where he's had a goal and an assist in a game.

And just those tight moments, you need those extra bits of quality, which you know, offend some of the Liverpool players.

I'm sure they won't take any offence, but he just is a step above, and he has that mentality, that coolness in the difficult situations.

And, you know, Gerald Kwanzaa had to come on for Canate and a proper battle against Wolves, who had more shots in the game as well than Liverpool, which is quite impressive considering.

And Wolves probably would have been entitled to a draw, but big save from Alison on the one-on-one.

and that's it these tight matches it takes more than you know quality with the ball at your feet takes a bit of mentality a bit of struggle and a bit of graft from these players to to get to the end and that's what happens you're going to be tired at these parts of the season so if you can muddle your way through against a much improved wolves team i

slott was saying on friday that couldn't you could play for anyone in the top six and of course you could and these are the teams that you come up against week in week out in england that even those in the bottom six you know maybe apart from Man United have got players that can play anywhere in the league they'll have these individuals and it is difficult and to battle your way through you know is credit to them and just keeps the ball rolling for the net for the next game which is Villa midweek and then City on Sunday so not an interesting time for for Liverpool and those games will be absolutely massive for them so if

they've stopped they've stopped the rot in adverted commas after you know Plymouth and Everton and done really well to get through that Wolves game.

Was Canate lucky to be on the pitch Seb?

I was surprised at the match of the day two I think it was Michael Richards and Ashley Williams saying it wasn't a yellow card.

I mean it looked that second one every inch a yellow card to me.

Yeah it just throws up these interesting debates because the initial booking that he had and then was for the foul and then he kicked the ball away which as we understand is supposed to be a yellow card as well.

Now we know back in Premier League history there's not been many occasions where they've shown two quickfire yellow cards.

Obviously Martinelli Martinelli was an example against Wolves.

But there maybe needs to be some clarification about this because I heard mixed messages in regards to this in that by the law you can show two quickfire yellow cards.

But by almost the spirit of the game, do we want to see that?

It goes back to this suggestion that, you know, the Kovacic

potential second yellow last season, the idea was given that Michael Oliver didn't want to ruin the game.

Now, I actually sympathise with an element of that because I, Redcast to me, I'm not a fan of them in general play anyway.

I think they just destroy matches and obviously violent behavior, you know, it's their fault.

And this particular game, I didn't particularly want to see Canate sent off, but I actually think he should have gone.

And I think even

Slot realised this by taking him off.

Slightly worried from Liverpool's point of view that if it was an injury for him, because that would be a big, big loss.

I mean, I've sung his praises for most of this season.

I think after Salah, he's been arguably, when I've watched Liverpool games, the key to them maintaining pressure on sides and keeping teams away from their goal.

To add to that, I don't think I've seen Anfield this nervous for a long while.

I think that Merseyside Derby had a massive effect on the supporters.

And that second half

was quite incredible.

It felt very much...

You wonder if Wolves had equalised earlier in the second half, then maybe there'd been an onslaught.

But the fact it went all the way to the end and they were hanging on to an extent because they were with a lack of chances was eye-catching and you wonder now this tough run of fixtures we always say the games that define stuff and we've spoken about teams going on a run no one wants to go on a run in this league this season so if we can throw that in the bin but ultimately let's let's see this is this is the week i think where the title is decided that's assuming that arsenal can win games all the way to the end of the season which it's not really looking likely.

I mean, Kunya's goal barry is beautiful.

But actually,

Matoma's touch is the touch of the weekend.

But that little flick from Bellegarde to put Moneti through was so joyous.

Yeah,

Manetzi and Bellegarde made a big difference when they came on.

I was surprised Bellegarde didn't start, if I'm honest, but

he certainly helped change the game.

Manetzi, he put him through with a delightful flick.

Not too many people beat Allison in one-on-one, and Manetzi wasn't able to do it.

And then Bellegarde had a little, I think, back heel.

I think it was him for to set up kuna for his goal yeah wolves will be disappointed they didn't give a better account of themselves in the first half whatever about kanata getting not getting sent off i don't think the diaz penalty should have been given because he shoved he shoved agbadou in the small of the back which prevented agbadou intercepting the pass and then it uh diaz was brought down by jose sat i don't think that penalty should have been given but again it's it's not enough you've got a really really

anti-shove agenda, Barry, you've got here.

I'm just getting sick of it.

It's either a shove in the back or it isn't.

And

if it's enough to stop the defender intercepting the pass, then it's enough to award a free kick.

So I don't think that penalty should be given, but I seem to be in a very small minority on this one.

But it is a hill I will die on, Max.

No, I agree.

I agree.

I agree.

I agree.

Quite often X-Pro say,

you know, the the defender's got to be stronger there.

But, you know, if you're walking down the street and somebody pushes you in the back, you're sort of surprised.

I mean, okay, you'd perhaps be expecting it a bit more on a football pitch, but yes, if you're pushed, it does push you off a stride.

I see where you're all coming from.

Although I just, it didn't exercise me as much.

I didn't climb the hill with you, Barry.

I'm just looking at you on the hill thinking, that's not a bad place.

It's quite a small hill.

Fair enough.

It's next to your concussion hill, which is a bigger hill that you're also prepared to die.

What we do know is you will die on a hill.

That's all we know.

We just don't know which hill yet.

The FA has charged Everton Liverpool and Liverpool's managerial staff, including Arna Slot and assistant Sipka Hulshoff, following the end to that game in Goodison.

Obviously, Curtis Jones was suspended for that game.

Decore was out of Everton's game, but Slot was on the touchline because the hearing hasn't happened yet and he may not be.

I noticed afterwards he said the referee got all the calls right, including that jotter dive.

Actually, probably worth just mentioning that briefly will in that you know you don't get booked for diving anymore that feels like a very sort of 2013 thing that happened and now you you can dive all you want yeah jotter took it to a new level though so fair play to him really jumped up in the air nowhere near the player leg was maybe in the vicinity but yeah it was a dreadful dive really

i mean when players jump up you have to wonder if they're getting it right.

The thing is that with all these marginal gains in football, I don't understand why players aren't spending time in training learning how to dive better.

Because if you can do it, if you can make the contact look real, then you're going to get penalties.

Whereas Jot is clearly not dedicated enough to diving and as they've put in a dreadful dive, not got a penalty and you know got booked for his mishandling of the matter.

If he'd taken the contact like a better diver would have, he would have got a penalty and Liverpool would have been out of sight.

Well, the irony is, I suppose, that with all these marginal gains in football the one team that is being run by people who are obsessed with marginal gains are a complete laughing stock

matt says is Mikel Marino the new Paul Warhurst yeah Lester Arsenal 2 I suppose the interesting thing he said about this is he said he hadn't played centre forward since he was eight or nine

But he has two chances and he finishes them just so calmly.

I don't think there's a player in Arsenal's squad who could have taken that chance as well as he did, even if they were all fit.

That's the sort of state of their attack in many ways.

Yeah, Marino, he was signed.

When he was signed, there was so much talk about him winning duels and him being so good in those sort of areas and being a physical beast with a technical ability.

And it's exactly what Arsenal need up front.

They need that focal point.

They need that player.

Not necessarily to stretch the game because he won't do that, but to occupy centre halves.

I mean, they started the game with three small ones and it just wasn't working.

I feel for Sterling in particular because he's had such a long career.

He's had, you think about he was playing in different positions when he was 17 and he was in the England team as a teenager and he's had, he's up there with most appearances in the Premier League, but he offered nothing in this game.

Whereas Waneri on the opposite side, and I'm sure you were going to ask that anyway, so I'm going to rush ahead to talk about him because I think from because considering his age, it was quite a remarkable performance.

Considering where the club are in the league, considering what's required of him, considering what will be required of him, it was mightily impressive.

He was a goal away from almost a perfect performance, hitting the woodwork twice, creating the first goal.

He was beating men, as in literally men, getting past them.

I know Leicester aren't a great side, but they were defending quite well for large portions of that game.

His touch was excellent.

And I actually think

he offers more to the Arsenal side than Erdoga does in terms of progressing the play, making things happen.

Erdoga was getting a lot of praise on TNT for his performance.

He was being called a genius and everything else.

In Miriam Spirits, he's a player that Arsenal need to, I think, still need to treat as a Bernardo Silva figure, as a link man, as a man.

But even Bernardo Silva, I think, influences the result a bit more than Erdoga does.

He looks great on the ball, and he's a great asset for Arsenal to have.

But what Waneri did so well was he looked to make something happen immediately the way that De Bruyne does, the way that, to be fair, Saka does try to do.

And for a 17-year-old, I can't actually think of many players of his age having that influence on a game in the Premier League.

You can think back to Rooney, who've seen Fabregas do it, but it's quite rare.

It is quite rare.

And it was, I think, the difference as well as their functional centre forward.

If I was an elite podcast host, I'd have the, you know, Arsenal's points per game with and without Erdoga because I do think that

when he was missing, it does make a big difference to that side.

But I mean, I hear what you say about Weneri.

I mean, I guess the question is, does Thomas Tuchel chuck him in, Will?

I mean, I've got no problem if he did.

He's got the quality.

If you're good enough, you're old enough.

I think someone once said.

Yeah, I'm very happy to fast-track anyone with that level of ability.

If you perform in the Premier League and you have those talents, why not?

I mean, there's not many English players that are doing it consistently in the Premier League that can play in those positions, I'd say.

So I'd be more than happy to see him, you know, get that experience.

I'm not

followed his

youth career maybe as close to you as some Arsenal fans, so I'm not sure what experience he's had at international level, but maybe an under-21 call-up followed by a bit of before getting into the full squad might help him for experience.

But otherwise, yeah,

if you're doing things like that against Leicester, then you're more than happily

perform for England.

The thing with Thomas Tuchel is he's been brought in on quite a short contract with one specific job to do, so he has no real incentive

to bring on untried teenagers.

But

I think Luaneri is making a case that's difficult to be ignored.

I thought Leicester played quite well in this game, actually, by their usual pretty low standards.

The first half was more or less a non-event, but indeed he had two presentable chances.

Then they should have gone ahead, but for a brilliant piece of defending by Miles Lewis Kelly to prevent Jordan Ireland Cross getting to Bobby Dott Cordova Reid at the far post.

And then Mourinho came on to save the day for Arsenal in the last 10 minutes.

And

like Spurs, Leicester fans had a big protest before this game they're just fed up with

ticket prices dire player recruitment and poor communication from the club overlords or no communication whatsoever from the club overlords to the fans apart from the occasional programme notes urging them to be unified you know unified behind what they and spurs fans might ask behind vout fast that's who you're unified behind.

Did anyone see Martin Kean apologize to Rude Van Nisteloy on TNT Sports?

Quite a long time between jumping into his face and apologizing, but you know, it all counts, I guess, doesn't it?

That'll do for part one.

Part two will begin at the Etihad.

HiPod fans of America, Max here.

Barry's here, too.

Hello.

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It holds all your notes, to-dos, and documents, but it's smaller than a paperback and an incredible 0.26 inches thin, so it slips easily into a bag or jacket pocket.

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A proper football journalist, Matty.

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Sucks!

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It's a theatrical masterpiece that's thrilling, inspiring, dazzlingly entertaining, and unquestionably the most emotionally stirring musical this season.

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Playing the Orpheum Theater, October 22nd through November 9th.

Tickets at BroadwaySF.com.

Welcome to part two of the Guardian Football Weekly.

So Manchester City 4, Newcastle 0.

Omar Marmouche.

It sort of feels onomatopoeic a bit, Will, doesn't it?

A sort of a hat-trick.

Marmouche, there he is.

It just appears like something a magician would say.

Mamouch!

Hat-trick for me.

And

he looks really good.

Seems like a lovely bloke as well when they chat to Mars with his first ever hat-trick.

And, you know, it's nice to talk about someone that that isn't Erling Haaland in terms of scoring goals or not scoring goals for Man City.

Yeah I mean even in that Chelsea game where he made his debut his

performance was overlooked somewhat because Kusanoff had an absolute nightmare but Mamush was really good that day very lively you know taking on players getting in getting in behind a bit too many offsides on that occasion

but it's helping Haaland because you've seen Haaland score those goals where Edison lumps it over the top and Haaland runs onto it.

But now see, you've got two people that can do those runs and it's given defences something to think about.

It might have

hindered Newcastle somewhat not knowing what they were doing at the weekend and Paul Kir and Trippier forgetting how to head a football.

But they say they've got more options and people look more confident.

Doku looked confident when he came on, which probably not seen for a little while.

He's been out injured.

So yeah, Mamouch looks really good, sort of player to you know, ignite a season almost, that speed, that thought process and clearly can finish you know different types of finishing

easily could have for the first one we'd gone through could have tapped it to the side for harlan to to knock it into an empty thought nope i'm having this dink the goalkeeper make his mark on english football you know it'd be fun to see him against him against salah but big big day for cairo on sunday perhaps harsh on edison to say lump it over the top but um i i i i hear i hear you um where where does mum where did he play?

It wasn't like a front two or where was where was he?

He was getting a lot a lot closer to Haaland.

I think it's becoming a bit more fluid than it has been recently because of the options we've got.

But yeah, he was getting a lot closer.

And I think Haaland has been isolated.

So he's working off him, working around him.

He's played all over since he's arrived.

He was on the left, on the right, down the middle at Leighton Orient.

And yeah, I think as getting a lot closer to Haaland to make centre, you know, Haaland is what he he is and he's incredible what he does, but

probably having one striker is not always ideal for a team.

And so having that little bit of extra minutes helping Haaland and, you know, Marmouche

being in the vicinity is just asking more questions.

And we've asked defences we Manchester City have asked

defences for a long time.

So yeah, he's a versatile forward and happy to play across the front four basically, which is, you know, that versatility is gold dust at this level.

I don't want to turn to Marmush pod but I'm just going to do it quickly because I think what's amazing about him he joined I think a month after City had won the treble he joined Intrac Frankfurt on a free transfer having scored five league goals for Wolfsburg or something like that and one season essentially has caught the eye of a lot of people around Europe but it does make you think about how these these things work I saw him in Afcon I think in 2022 the final against Senegal because I covered that tournament he was with Salah and they were both playing off either wing.

So, again, development of players, him becoming a central striker at Frankfurt, and now he's going to be this player to play off Haaland.

Whereas people were thinking, he's not going to play.

He's not going to play, is he?

And it's just amazing how football changes so quickly.

Yeah.

I was having this thought, and this is not related to this about, I don't know, the players who are playing for teams at the bottom end of the Premier League, who for their whole life have been the best player in their school, you know, club, county, whatever, whatever, and always having the ball the whole time.

And now, suddenly, you're in teams where you have 30% possession.

Like, you never get the damn thing.

And it must be so weird.

You almost need to train two different sets of humans and ones that are going to have the ball.

And then you could have a really good team at the bottom of the Premier League who just

were no good with the ball, but just brilliant off it.

Anyway, it was an idle thought I had

while doing some parenting.

Nico Gonzalez also impressed Baz

in this game.

Well, Marmouch was the player of the match, but I suppose Nico Gonzalez, when you're in that position, you don't get the same kind of applaudits as someone who scores a hat-trick, but I think he was instrumental in City's win.

I think Pep Gardeolo will be mightily relieved by how good he was.

You have to caveat this by how bad Newcastle were.

They just cannot win at Man City, at the Etiad.

But Nico Gonzalez was a...

major factor in the dismal nature of Newcastle's performance.

Maybe Newcastle's players have got into that mindset now where they've got one eye on the Carabao Cup final.

Eddie Howe is very much Pep Guardiola's bunny and

got patronised again after this game for how brilliant he is.

On the back of another hiding, he must be getting sick of that.

Those pats on the head, condescending pats on the head.

Pep's pats.

Anyway, yes, Nico Gonzalez, very impressive performance.

Pep Guardiola described him afterwards as a mini Rodri,

which was, of course, a compliment.

And

City fans will be hoping he continues this level of performance.

I think the last time I was on, I still had this prediction that I still think it would be Liverpool first and Manchester City second.

And I haven't changed that because I think if you look in January, City spent 200 million on addressing areas where they were short.

They went out there.

No other club did that.

And three of those started yesterday, and we've spoken about two of them already.

These are difference makers, whereas nobody else in that Champions League mix has been able to do that.

So I didn't think it was that outrageous a take.

And they could, from here, push on.

I think their game against Liverpool would tell us a lot about what state they're in.

The Real Madrid fixture may be done.

We'll see.

But they are a side with quality.

They're a side that have been there before.

I don't think there's beyond the realms of possibility that they can string five, six, seven wins together, and that might be enough enough to get second.

Yeah.

Two wins for Brighton over Chelsea in six days across the league and the FA Cup.

Neil says, is it wrong that my favourite Brighton goal of the season was assisted by the goalkeeper?

Surely that sort of route one crassness should disqualify it from any goal of the season discussion.

Barry, this Karamatoma first touch is...

I made many noises.

It was so good.

Yeah, it was an astonishing piece of skill running at full speed alongside Trevor Chalaba, who'll be having nightmares about this for some time to come, I suspect.

Looking over his head at a ball coming down behind him and takes it down with the most immaculate cushion touch,

just

out of this world.

If I attempted something like that, I would just go skittering off my knee, my shin, I'd miss it completely, whatever.

I'm not sure Trevor Chalaba would give you the opportunity to try and take the touch, Barry, if we're being really honest.

Well, there is that, yeah.

At least we'll know why Barry will die on that hill because he's missed controls and just falls down,

rolls to the bottom,

and then you know, to cutter inside and

finish, you know, just it was

an astonishing goal.

It wasn't a brilliant weekend of Premier League football, but that was the standout moment in the opening game, you know, for the whole weekend.

It was just and I suppose that we all know how to do it.

You have to, your

no, no, I mean, like, I don't, I'm not saying I can do it, but the idea is, you know, you've got to, you've got to judge the speed of the ball, and then your foot has to be going in the same direction.

I'm acting this out in my shed, you know, and has to be going in the same direction as the ball, and sort of just get the speed exactly right to cushion the ball.

To do that, Seb, like, I, but it does remind me of Berbatov, who could just stop anything just like out of the sky, like

a like a brick.

But yeah it did it did look it did look like you were acting out hamlet then yes i don't know you had your hat the skull was in the ear i don't know if that was supposed to i don't know why you had

my balance the you let your arms move it was a natural position for the arm but yes i i wish i want to talk about it more yeah i think it's one of those moments that again it's those reminders of why these players are so much better than we'll ever be is because the pace we know the pace the game is which which is played and the speed at which he has to make that decision get away from somebody who's who's you know as physically good as he is, and and and finish off that chance.

And I actually think that's why I know there was some criticism of the goalkeeper, but there seems to be criticism of Chelsea goalkeepers all the time.

But I think it's just the speed in which he just does make these decisions.

I think I go back to De Bruyne.

He used to do that, catch goalkeepers out with those sort of finishes along the ground.

He's just such a watchable player.

He's had some criticism from Brighton supporters about his consistency and his influence on the game.

But I did the FA Cup fixture of this a week ago, and just the way he dribbles is just so unique.

And I was delighted that he didn't leave this league because you want to see more of a player like him.

And to add to that, the backstory of it just makes it even more impressive.

They have to have these courses in the country somewhere because there's something in it.

It's just incredible.

Yeah.

Meanwhile, for Chelsea, Will,

they didn't have a shot on target.

They had 70% of the ball.

Where are we on the...

I mean, it sort of feels like

we all said about a month ago, should we start taking Chelsea seriously?

And everyone, and then Mareska said no.

And then everybody, including players, went, oh, I see.

We're not meant to take them seriously.

So we don't.

And now no one is.

I think it sort of goes back to maybe the problem of having too many players.

You know, you're swapping out your goalkeeper.

Shalibers come in.

He was really good at Bristol Palace.

DeSasi was at

Villa on Saturday where I was.

The sort of the overcomplication of matters at Chelsea, where you think you you lose a game, you need to change things up and they're sort of going through these motions where swapping players in and out and not really helping with consistency.

And I think maybe the methods of Mareska have tired them out a bit at this stage of the season and they've been found out a little bit and they need to just sort of take take stock and go again in the second half.

You know, they've got rid of a few players like Chilwell, you know, maybe wandering around in the bomb squad wasn't helping.

But yeah, a bit of a sort of in and out in January might have just sort of unbalanced them a little bit.

And I guess when you've got no confidence in your first-choice goalkeeper, it's never going to help.

You're sort of relying on your second choice to come in and do wonderful things.

And yeah, I just think it's looking a bit disjointed at the moment and a bit tired and a bit passive.

I think they're really missing Romeo Lavia, and their decline has coincided with his absence from the midfield.

Kaicedo started the season well,

he was awful in this game.

Jaden Sancho's gone off the boil.

And in the absence of Nicholas Jackson, Christopher and Kunku sort of passed up another opportunity to stake a claim that he's worthy of a starting position in this team.

One presumes Enzo Maresco's position is going to be in danger if this continues.

The Evergreen Danny Welbeck did it really well, I thought, for both Minter goals.

And Minter also did really well for both Minter goals.

I've been digging out Vout Fast recently, and I think in the

spirit of equality when it comes to bushy-haired defenders, the way Minter sent Coca-Cola for a hot dog on both occasions was quite funny.

To Villa Park, Villa won it, switch one while you were there.

I mean, Villa is going to be really disappointed to, you know, play 10 men go behind and not get a win in this game

yeah this was noticeably one of the games Seb didn't mention at the start to uh begin the show with so

this is my career Seb I do my best uh I mean it's not up to you to be clear Will I don't think people are relying on you to make this game good or not like that you shouldn't feel that weight of that burden of responsibility I mean, maybe I should have got should have gone to rather like you with your Hamlet and I could sort of make it sound a far better game than it was.

yeah

villa started pretty underwhelmingly they don't you know they're lacking a bit of energy they had the ball in the final third a lot even before ipswich went down to 10 men but created very little in that period and then the sending off in the 40th minute obviously changes the game the first one wasn't a booking but then once you're on that in that position you shouldn't be doing the second one which is sort of bundling a player over on the edge of the box which was a clear sort of cynical foul.

And then Ipswich were really good with the backs against the wall.

Liam DeLap is an excellent striker who took a finish.

What a finish that is.

Took his one chance superbly.

And Villard knew that, you know, even in the say in the first half, they were so flat, so at half-time, they brought on Rashford to try and change things.

And he was lively on the left.

And

in the end, it was his free kick, rattled the crossbar, and Watkins knocked it in.

But Ipswich, rather wonderfully, have to thank the Premier League debutant goalkeeper at 28, Alex Palmer, who's

spent his time at West Brom.

I think he was on the bench a few times for West Brom when they were in the Premier League, but he's been on loan at Kiddeminster and Oldham and placed like seven loans, I think it was.

before becoming a first choice at West Brom and

back close to home at Villa Park and produced some wonderful saves.

Yeah.

Rashford's stats sever, quite interesting.

Played 45 minutes, eight crosses, eight touches in the opposition box, won seven duels, created four chances, had four shots, three tackles, three successful take-ons, hit the woodwork once.

I suspect if you look at what he's done for Man United this season, the stats probably wouldn't be that good.

To be honest, I can't stop thinking about digging out fast.

But anyway, yes, so

no, Rashford,

I've always liked Rashford as a player.

I think he's a player who's explosive, can make something happen really quickly.

He can beat a man quickly, can get a shot away.

Different to the Sterling situation, it felt like if Rashford could make that move and go out on loan, he would impress in this period.

And actually, you look at Villa's front line, and it's crazy that the players they have there.

You think Marlon is there, Sencio is there.

We're talking about Champions League finalists and Champions League winners here, as well as Leon Bailey, who was highly coveted for years, Morgan Rogers.

They've got an excellent front line, and that's losing Duran,

which adds to their frustration.

I'm most interested to see

he's obviously eligible to play in the Champions League, Rashford, how he performs at that sort of level for Villa, because he could be the sort of player that helps them get through their potential tie, their tie, upcoming tie when it's decided.

So

yeah,

I'm pleased from a personal point of view because I think him deciding to do what he did during lockdown, I think did take a lot out of him mentally.

I think when you go into a zone and you take yourself into a zone where you're dealing with politicians and people whose career it is to cause trouble in that respect, he went into that wasp's nest.

And I think that was a tough for him to take and it definitely knocked him off his stride.

So I'd like to see him get back to what he can do.

But again, he's another player who performed as a teenager and he's hitting the point now.

How long can your career be at those heights?

A working definition of a politician is just to cause trouble in whatever area they happen to be.

Yes, Baz.

Just going back to Ipswich's goalkeeping,

the brilliant performance from Alex Palmer, is it too simplistic to suggest that if they go down, it will be due in no small part to their quite inexplicable decision to make Arijan Murich their first choice goalkeeper at the start of the season?

Because he he look I don't want to pile on him but he he's not he was not up to the job last season when he was playing for Burnley and he made a lot of mistakes while playing for ipswich as well which costs some points yeah quite a few points i know that's an interesting point you make and uh uh one for uh uh kieran mckenna to think about i guess at the end yes will

i'll try and paraphrase nick ames who is our uh expert on ipswich speak to i met him in the pub afterwards because that's sort of professional i am although i don't have a drink but i think ipswich problem is that he probably still doesn't know he's starting 11 that comes down to the goalkeeper as well And, you know, this has happened chopping and changing throughout the season.

A lot of incomings at Ipswich in January and

at the start of the season.

So, yeah, I think that's one of his big problems.

I will also, I just want to add, Campbell Phillips is really good in central midfield, which was nice to see.

And also, The Guardian's wine expert is an Ipswich fan.

So, hello to David Williams.

Hello, David Williams.

Yeah, we should pay tribute to Paddy Barkley, who sadly passed away last week at the age of 77.

He began his reporting career at The Guardian, went on to work for pretty much every broadsheet title, The Observer, The Independent, Sunday Telegraph, The Times.

He was a prolific author as well.

I wrote Sir Matt Busby, The Man Who Made a Football Club, amongst others.

That was shortlisted for the Cross Football Book of the Year in 2017, a Sunday supplement staple.

I don't know,

I didn't cross paths with him that often, but every time I did, he was like incredibly engaging and sort of friendly to younger people in the industry, which isn't necessarily always the case.

I don't know if any of you knew him.

I didn't know him as well as others who appear on this pod, but he was always terrific company, great crack on a night out, great stories, bit of a rogue.

And

yeah,

I didn't find out till Sunday morning.

And

I was really shocked.

And it's terrible news.

I know him and Philippe were great, great pals, and Philippe's very upset.

Yeah, we'll talk to Philippe about him when he is next on.

But yeah, we send our love to his friends and family, of course.

And that'll do for part two.

We'll begin part three at St.

Mary's.

HiPod fans of America.

Max here.

Barry's here too.

Hello.

Football Weekly is supported by the Remarkable Paper Pro.

Now, if you're a regular listener to this show, you'll have heard us talk before about the remarkable paper pro.

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Perfect for working professionals whose jobs take them out of the office.

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A proper football journalist, man.

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Welcome to part three of the Guardian Football Weekly.

Mark says Bournemouth seem to win every week, but are still only fifth.

West Ham lose every week, but are 10 points above the relegation zone.

Are some Premier League games subject to the official secrets act that go unreported it's a good point barry isn't it i can't remember a bournemouth not winning a football match and it they're fifth and again look they they they went to southampton winning at southampton isn't necessarily the hardest thing in the world but they were brilliant again yeah they're brilliant again because they're a really good team and they're still missing quite a few players sinesi smith uh both are strikers evanil sinunal

Julian Arah who's out but they they keep plugging away they made life a little bit difficult for themselves in this game by letting southampton back into the game through a rare camera and sulemana goal so that made it 2-1 but marcus tavernier um

sort of eased any jitters by scoring a late uh third for bournemouth but they're a terrific team they're up to fifth now the results elsewhere went for them uh this weekend because Forrest, Chelsea, Newcastle all lost.

And I

see on current form no reason why Bournemouth shouldn't qualify for a Champions League place.

I think they should set their sights, and I'm sure they have set their sights higher than just the Europa League or the Conference League.

It was possible.

I can't remember who I was listening to the other day wondering if their stadium was big enough for the championship.

You know, it's got to be a certain size, but they have to go and play at St.

Mary's

to,

can you imagine?

But like, it would be so good, wouldn't it, for Bournemouth to make it in there?

And

I suppose, you you know, Sev, it's Iraola has done this unbelievable job because we, you know, we talk about the injuries and the injuries they've had and people playing out of position, you know, Lewis Cook slotting back in at right back and Watara coming in up front and just hitting the ground like that.

It's sensational.

All the excuses we make for our other sides, you know, with injuries and lack of options here and lack of options there.

This is why I just think they're the best coach side in the division.

I mean, the job he's done is remarkable.

And

to add to that, as we say about the stadium and all of that element of it, there's a uniqueness to that.

It's just such a small ground when you go there.

It's mad in relation to all the others.

I've said multiple times they're my new soft spot team, but I think they're bigger than that now.

They are a proper side.

Whereas, you know,

Liverpool beat them, but that was a game that almost had some freak moments in it.

It was a freak miss from Clivert.

There were things going on in that game that just haven't really happened for Bournemouth.

And maybe that's part of, you know, Liverpool and the role that they're on and the things maybe going their way to get them over the line.

But besides that game, every game, they give every team an absolute nightmare.

And I really, I'd love to, I'd love to see the way they play in European football because they feel like one of those sides that, you know,

back in the days on the Champions League matches, they used to be on free-to-air.

And people had never heard of these sides when the Deportivo team came up and you're like, look at their little ground reauthor.

And they just look so good.

But yet they had all these old players like Fran in the interesting.

I think it's Nico Gonzalez's dad, isn't he?

So the way these things link up.

I just love the idea that they could get into Europe and we get to see that.

My favourite moment in the game was in the lead-up to the Southampton goal.

So, in the move just before it, Tyler Dibling showing his amazing balance and trickery and sliding past like four players and slotting it to Onuachi, who just trod on it and fell over.

And I just thought that the dichotomy of that was just

absolutely glorious.

Aaron Ramsdale had a really good game as well, worth saying that.

And a great win for Bournemouth.

And Ryan Christie was so good to Craven Cottage, Fulham 2, Forest 1.

I mean, Fulham battered Forrest in this game Will and I I don't know if I was surprised or not I know they're both good Forrest perhaps haven't rotated that much might be a bit tired

but just thrilling to see Adama Troyore being good yeah I think for Forrest it might be the knock-on effect of that Bournemouth game I know they had the move to the three centre-backs when they played against Brighton as a sort of response to that and they beat Brighton 7-0 so you think well this this is a plan we're sticking with actually the plan before was working quite well so I do wonder if the the three centre-backs is really necessary especially when you know they're doing so well at the top of the league but yeah Trury's always been one of those players he's got everything as a winger it just doesn't always

come together at the right time his delivery is not perfect he's a bit inconsistent when it comes to that but yeah

you know he must be one of the most hated wingers to play against for fullbacks in the Premier League with that speed, the physicality, and yeah, he definitely got it right at the weekend.

Incredible cross for the opener.

And I just think forest again a bit passive um it's a bit on the mind about bournemouth and you know when you ship five like that and a bit worried i think they just need to lose that mentality a little bit and get back on on the front foot and not you know not worry about opposition as as they seem to be at the moment uh when they're away from home at fulham but yeah uh fulham say in the best form they've been in probably since they've been back in the Premier League I'd argue.

And

they've got the right attributes to keep going and they're going a little bit under the radar thanks to Bournemouth.

But yeah, once you get, if you can get Triore to be a bit more consistent like that, and Smith Rowe's doing really well at the moment, yeah, I think

they can keep pushing, look for Europe.

Nico Williams has had a great season, but yeah, God, he had an afternoon against Triore, didn't he?

And Calvin Bassey's winner, he was so happy.

I wondered if anyone in the UK or even the world was as happy as Calvin Bassey at that exact moment.

If you could just see the whole world and say, who's the happiest person?

I was like, it's definitely Calvin Bassey.

Like, just a one in the eye for people who score goals and look miserable about it.

It was a total delight.

Palace one, Everton two, TB says, can Everton win the Everton Cup?

Basically, I mean, we talked about them a lot after the Liverpool game, but this renaissance under David Moyes and turning Beto into Marco Van Basten is like, what an achievement that is.

Yeah, well, Betto is clearly

in the team.

Let's face it.

He's in the team because he has to be in the team because there's nobody else.

And he's grasped his opportunity with both hands in a way that, say, Christopher Nkunku hasn't.

He's repaying the faith being shown in him with some assure performances.

You know, that goal...

He didn't snatch at it.

He took his time.

He had a defender and a goalkeeper to beat after latching onto that through ball.

And, you know, he

took his time calm finish delighted with himself i'd love to know what his celebration's about the chest beating and then snapping an imaginary few sticks over his knee i think what david moise has done with everton is

well i don't really know he's got them scoring goals he's Jake O'Brien who couldn't get a look in who I'd never heard of when he signed from was it Leon or Leon I think despite him being an Irishman they'd never heard of him he couldn't get a look in under Sean Dyce Moyes is playing him at right back.

He's playing very well.

And

Al Caraz comes in.

He scores.

It looks like after a lot of relentless misery, supporting Everton is fun again.

And I think Everton fans deserve that.

Apparently that is

the LeBron James celebration.

Oh, Corvetto's hero, by all accounts.

Seb, you wanted to...

This is your favourite game of the weekend, apparently.

Yeah, probably because I was commentating on it.

But do you know, it felt like a a throwback.

I mean, in Tarek Mitchell's case,

he took that literally.

But I just, but seeing the two centre-forwards gave me such great joy.

And Alan Smith was next to me, and obviously, from his point of view, it gave him great joy.

He commented earlier on the number of diagonal balls being played in the match, and I just thought, yeah, you bang on.

This is exactly the type of game this is.

Centre halves heading the ball away and physical tussles with the striker.

I think Beto, he had,

he had only four Everton players, outfield players had more touches than Betto did in the game, which is extraordinary, being away from home and getting that much involvement.

You know, forget the goals, forget the trophies.

Imagine Erling Harlan watching that at home thinking, I'd love to be involved as much as Betto is, you know, a touch of the envy, just a touch.

I thought it was...

A game that could have gone either way.

I felt a bit sorry for Crystal Palace.

I saw Wharton coming on in the second half and realised he's definitely a player to make a difference for them.

He just does little things that I don't think, I can't think of many other English midfielders who can do that.

I talked about progressing the play earlier.

His first thought is to pass forward,

between the lines and get the team on the front foot immediately.

He's still a bit rusty.

I mean it was a long, he gave the ball away near the penalty area, but he was so angry with himself because he wants to play the game at his own pace.

But from Everton's point of view, I mean, right now, people were telling Everton supporters, be careful what you wish for, but what they got is David Moyes back at the club and winning games and West Ham fans looking on in envy

another win for Brentford this one at West Ham Graham Potter now I've seen only one win in his first six games as West Ham manager

time has beaten us so the fans of Brentford can can yell at us this is where the spurs manu game should have been you're probably right yeah no you're absolutely right and we will get you know just typical big six in Verd commas chat uh you know Look, I apologize.

You can't please everyone.

Duds, he says, with Gary Monk gone, is it finally time for Max and Barry to run Cambridge and produce a miracle?

Yep, we got rid of Gary Monk.

I would say perhaps a bit too late, given that we are rock bottom.

He had got one win in his last 13, got one point in the first nine games.

But he seemed like a lovely bloke, so I wish him all the best.

Joachim says, could you take a minute discussing the difference between fuck you and fuck off?

Why is one worse than the other?

Yeah, this is during Real Madrid's one-all-draw with Osasuna on Saturday.

Dude Bellingham Bellingham got a straight red in the 39th minute after a verbal exchange with referee José Luis Munuera Montero.

The referee's report alleges that Bellingham directed the phrase fuck you towards him, which could lead to a suspension ranging from four to 12 matches.

Bellingham and Anchelotti contend it was a misunderstanding, asserting that Bellingham just said fuck off, a less personal expression in English.

Real Madrid plans to present video evidence to support this claim and seek a reduced sanction.

What are our thoughts on this?

I mean, I

can I just say, I just feel like,

is he going to have like Danny Dyer as a witness?

You've got your fuck you's and you got your fuck offs, right?

Fuck off.

It's different to fuck.

I think

who at Robert Ridge is going to do that for you?

I think

there is a possibility that, you know, you do yell fuck off.

Just at like the car door, don't you?

Like

I yelled it when I head by the door the other day because my three-year-old was refusing to go to bed and I, you know, it was dark and I head by the door and I just went, oh, fuck off.

And I didn't say that.

So I would never say fuck you to Ian Rushton.

And I probably shouldn't have used such a swear word in his company, but I did.

But by all accounts, me and Barry were talking to Mark Langdon yesterday on the radio and he was saying, I mean, he was yelling at the ref for quite a long time before saying, fuck off or fuck you.

I mean, the truth is, Barry, fuck off can also be personal, can't it?

Oh, God, we're really getting into the long grass here.

Yeah, I mean,

I've just f-offed generally because I felt the universe was conspiring against me.

I may have been in an otherwise empty room.

It wasn't directed towards anyone, but

just,

yeah, it's not something I have a strong opinion on one way or the other, whether Jude Bellingham got sent off or not.

He will learn, hopefully, from the

and keep his Fs and Jeffs to himself next time.

Sorry, at the start of every season, like referees being taught the insults in various different languages so they know when to send people off.

Like English referees having to learn Spanish, French, German, etc., and so forth.

So they know when they're being sworn at in these different languages.

You know, is that what they're having?

Having in Spain, you've got to learn it in English because Spain have some great insults.

Like, you know, one of the main ones is, you know, I'll shit in your milk or shit in your mother's milk and things like that.

You know, maybe Bellingham should learn those.

Maybe they're, maybe it's less offensive you do it in their own language.

You know, you've made the effort.

Yeah.

Blue Duolingo, isn't it?

Is that something you could go in dragon's den with and say, you know.

Bluolingo.

It takes me back to a Bernie Mac sketch.

Basically, the best swear words are the ones that can be used as a verb, adjective, and noun.

And this might be part of Bellingham's defense of this because I don't want to swear too much more because, you know, you know,

I've done too much.

So leave it at that.

Yeah.

But no.

No, we'll leave it at that.

Yeah, that'll do.

We've done enough today.

Um, uh, thanks, everybody.

That'll do.

Thank you, Will.

Thanks, Max.

Uh, thank you, Seb.

Thank you, thanks, Barry.

Thank you.

Pubble Weekly was produced by Silas Gray.

Our executive producer is Phil Maynard.

This is The Guardian.