Look Mom! We Made It!

54m

Mazel Morons! Today we’re giving you the scoop on our Times Square Billboard, Ben’s recent trip to Jacksonville, and Josh’s mother’s assisted living newsletter. We share our best bite of the week and uncover the calorie count on your favorite Chick-Fil-A Grub. Plus, we answer your speak pipes about Bat MItzvah’s and why you should ALWAYS PAY YOUR TAXES - otherwise, what are ya nuts?! 


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Runtime: 54m

Transcript

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Speaker 5 The following podcast is a Dear Media production.

Speaker 6 They're just so good to do the good guys.

Speaker 5 Hi, Ben.

Speaker 2 Speaking of making it, Josh.

Speaker 5 Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 You saw our billboard?

Speaker 5 You saw this billboard. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry. I didn't bring it up sooner.
It is so epic.

Speaker 2 When I tell you you have no idea how big this billboard is until you actually see it, if you guys haven't seen it, you missed it because we can't afford more than a week.

Speaker 2 And by afford, I mean, we got it for free, but we couldn't couldn't afford more than a week anyways. What? It's only one week? One week.
It runs for one week.

Speaker 2 This is this ad. Well, there's two things, Josh, running at the same time.
This ad in Times Square is right next to where the ball drops, 43rd, and 7th.

Speaker 2 We had a good guy's video with what are you nuts. Just what are you nuts vertically was running, Josh, 10 stories.
The full video probably ran 30 stories.

Speaker 2 This is like a 40-story, massive what are you nuts. Me and you being goons.
It was the coolest thing I've ever seen in my life.

Speaker 2 And then separately, Link NYC, you'll notice throughout the entire city, is running the exact same ad on all of those used to be telephone areas that are now just screens.

Speaker 2 Link NYC is running that video too. Both of them, Josh, we, God, we're killing it.

Speaker 5 Well, I don't want to be in a contest here, but we're also in my mother's assisted livings newsletter this week.

Speaker 2 Sorry, Ben. I'm going to need a picture of that.
I'm going to need a picture of that. Proverb didn't happen.

Speaker 5 Barbara, our esteemed resident.

Speaker 5 Her son is a bit of a meshuga.

Speaker 2 And

Speaker 5 he has a AM radio internet show with his other Mesuga friend, and they're both rotund.

Speaker 2 God, I'm happy that we're doing Barb again. What a voice.
So good.

Speaker 5 Once in a generation. Thank God.
Anyway, dude, can we do a best spot of the week real quick?

Speaker 2 Please. I have.
I have one. Go.

Speaker 5 The other night, I went to a restaurant in Beverly Hills called

Speaker 5 La Docevida.

Speaker 2 Ladocevida. I've heard.
I've heard. This place,

Speaker 5 this was an institution in Beverly Hills for for many years. And then I think they kind of did like a refresh.
I mean, this was out of control. I went with my West Coast Ben, Len.

Speaker 5 We went, and let me tell you, I'm going to walk you through this because I had already done what all Jews do, which is I pre-planned. Okay.
I did homework on the restaurant. I got my intel.

Speaker 5 These people, they sit down. peruse the menu for 30 minutes.
It's not changing. You know, this is not SAT prep.
Order. Be ready.
He's here.

Speaker 2 Order.

Speaker 5 So first, beautiful breadbasket arrives. The vibe on this place, I feel like I was in the Lucchese crime family, allegedly.
Then they do a table side

Speaker 5 Caesar.

Speaker 5 You know, we love table side.

Speaker 2 The best.

Speaker 5 They're making it rain freshly grated parmesan on this thing beyond. Then we do some apps.
We do a shrimp fradiablo, beautiful. And then, and these are really, these are proper shrimp.

Speaker 5 These are like, these are shrimp on those Barry Bonds drugs. You know, that good, good, right? All juiced up.

Speaker 5 These shrimp, they had to get a bigger hat when they were in their mid-30s, which is normal.

Speaker 2 I'm not on it.

Speaker 5 I'm not on steroids, MLB.

Speaker 2 As Ina Garten would call them, 12-count shrimp, Josh. 12 to a pound.
Okay. 12 to a pound.
Continue. That's right.
That's right.

Speaker 5 And then we order that. And then we order.
And this is not, this is, I think, really ubiquitous on the East Coast, but you don't see it as much in LA. And shout out winter vegetables.

Speaker 5 We had an artichoke, but a stuffed artichoke.

Speaker 2 The best.

Speaker 5 Oh, with in like a lemon butter type picotta. You think I'm done with picata? I'm not done with picata.
Then the mains, a limon buccatini in almost like a light cream lemon sauce.

Speaker 2 My favorite.

Speaker 5 That buccatini, that buccatini bullies spaghetti when no one's looking. That buccatini has negative talk to spaghetti and goes, you call yourself a noodle?

Speaker 2 Can we give you some lemon pasta? You speak to Josh. Lemon pasta, I'm sorry.
Lemon pasta is it. It's it.
It indeed is it. Don't talk enough about it.
The way that the lemon cuts through the cream.

Speaker 2 That's right. The lemon zest and the lemon juice in a full fat, creamy pasta.

Speaker 2 God, chef's kiss. Beyond.

Speaker 5 And then we had a brandzino picata, right?

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 5 Funch from the from the waters in the Mediterranean, because otherwise, if it's not in the Mediterranean, as my friend Max Shapiro would say, just see bass. Just see bass.
It's not brand.

Speaker 5 And then the marquee item, we had a veal parmesan.

Speaker 2 Sounds fantastic. I need that in my belly.
I recently, Josh, I was in the great state of Vermont. Love.
I was in Middlebury, Vermont.

Speaker 2 That is where we do Spritz Society production. Did about a million cans just saying

Speaker 2 crazy news coming in March. Yeah, it was huge.
It was huge. But in the middle of the day, Josh, I had to pop out and grab myself a bite.

Speaker 2 And I looked far and wide and I found apparently the greatest sandwich shop in Vermont happened to be in Middlebury called Noonies, N-O-O-N-I-E-S.

Speaker 2 And when I tell you, Josh, you walk in and you just know that what you're about to get is it. is it.
They have the parchment paper.

Speaker 2 If you have a sandwich that's being made on parchment paper, you are in for a treat.

Speaker 2 A treat. I got long sub, hoagie, they call it, okay? I went tuna.
They gave me Havarti. Havarti is an incredibly underrated cheese.

Speaker 2 And if you're making sandwiches with Havarti, you know what you're doing. Shredded lettuce, onions, tomatoes.
Josh, they had curry mayonnaise. Curry mayo.
Whoa. Fantastic.

Speaker 5 You just threw a weird wrench in this thing.

Speaker 2 It was fantastic, I swear.

Speaker 5 A curry mayo? But don't say that like you're talking about, you know, the days of the week. This is a curveball.

Speaker 2 Have you had curry mayo? Never. Josh.
Olivia, have you had curry mayo? I have not.

Speaker 2 Okay. The two of you need to go and buy a bottle of Hellman's mayonnaise and a pack of curry, okay? And I want to see curry mayonnaise.
You have to like curry, but if you like curry,

Speaker 2 this is, you're in for a ride. You're in for a ride.
It was an unbelievable sandwich. Everything there looked amazing.
For first time, curry mayo, people, okay? I went crazy with the tuna.

Speaker 2 Try it on turkey. Have a turkey sandwich, avocado, red onion, curry mayonnaise.
Tell me your life hasn't changed. Outrageous.

Speaker 5 I believe you. Was there a chip? Did we involve a chip?

Speaker 2 No, I could have, but like, it felt so gluttonous. I have this huge sub.
I'm not then going to also grab like a Hal's or a, is Hal's soda or Hal's chips? Soda, right?

Speaker 5 Yeah, I think it's East Coast, too.

Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah, yeah. I wasn't going to go and grab a big fat bag of chips, but it definitely would have been better with a little sun chips harvest cheddar

Speaker 2 cheddar man so is my son what's your favorite chip don't get me started i like it all and i like it all under the sun but i think they should they live in different worlds you cannot compare a frito to any other chip you can't compare a do rito to any other chip no am i tripping no no you're a hundred percent right am i out of pocket is as the kids might say no the the frito the frito is the world's most versatile chip as well yes the frito is a vehicle to a sauce where chips typically, you can't dunk a harvest cheddar in anything.

Speaker 2 Otherwise, you're just a fatso, okay? But the Frito gives you the right to dunk.

Speaker 5 That's right.

Speaker 2 Yes. And Doritos.
My mom loves a Frito. Loves.
I remember my mom, she would buy a bag of Fritos with some clam dip. You ever have clam dip? My mom would dunk,

Speaker 2 she would kill me. She would kill me if I'm telling you this, but she would dunk her Fritos in that clam dip.
Ooh, baby.

Speaker 5 she loved it your mother her

Speaker 2 god bless this beautiful woman with her it's it's insane that she doesn't have gout you have no idea the things that she eats from where i also she'd also kill me for telling the story but i'm going to tell it anyways she goes into a deli josh this is probably i don't know whenever the listeria breakout was with boars head okay she goes into a deli okay and on there's a sign that says warning there was a breakout here.

Speaker 2 What does a normal person do, Josh?

Speaker 2 they avoid the boar's head they leave if i see that there was a breakout in the deli i'm gone what does my mom do not gonna happen to me yeah gets herself gets herself her meats goes on her way has a terrible stomach ache okay she has she could have died josh she could have died you don't around with listeria outbreaks what are you nuts She took it as a challenge.

Speaker 5 And they call her Iron Tummy Ava on the streets, and you know this.

Speaker 2 Absolutely.

Speaker 5 She took it as a challenge and all i gotta say folks is don't don't mess around with bad food this is not good you don't need it you don't need it okay don't do it well that's what i always hear because you know i'm on the prepper side of tick tock yes don't worry about it i just want to see people's shelters and this one guy who was a prepper who was showing his his nuclear fallout shelter under his house was like these best spy dates are a total suggestion

Speaker 5 he's like god more than a year after you can go. I'm like, a year? Like, I don't believe a couple of years.

Speaker 2 What is he talking about?

Speaker 2 Like, what can he do a year?

Speaker 5 Imperishable Nutella. Nutella, I remember he was like, oh, please, this will be good for another year.

Speaker 2 I think I would agree with that. I would agree with that.
Okay. For sure.
Like a peanut butter, I'm not caring so much about a best buy date. That I totally agree with.
You scared me.

Speaker 2 I was like, what about a yogurt? Oh, that's milk. That's absurd.
Yeah. Absurd.
Honestly, I think the best buy dates are too long.

Speaker 2 You ever pick up a jug of milk, use it for two weeks, check the best by date, and it's not for like another three months? And you're like, what's going on here? Ultra process.

Speaker 5 And that I'm not, I like pasteurization. I don't like this ultra pass.
That's crazy.

Speaker 2 No, I don't like it. I don't want it.

Speaker 2 What do you think of that raw milk, Josh? What do you think of that raw?

Speaker 5 We've talked about this.

Speaker 5 That's it. We're having a neurologist on.

Speaker 2 No, we haven't spoken about this like this. Yes, we have.
And this is exactly. No, my memory is clear as day.
We did.

Speaker 2 I love you, Olivia. Look, I'm sorry.
Thursday, Friday, I'm in Jacksonville. Monday, Tuesday, I'm in Vermont.
I have a busy week.

Speaker 2 I need no neurologist. I'm fine.
So, no, okay, no raw milk. We'll stop talking about it.
No problem. Okay,

Speaker 2 we spoke about it.

Speaker 5 Hey, it's Josh and Ben, and we are here to tell you about the Galaxy S25 Ultra from Samsung.

Speaker 2 This phone is amazing. It's true AI companion that evolves with you to do more for you, like handling multiple tasks with just one ask.

Speaker 2 For example, I can tell it to find a restaurant nearby and text it to my friends, or even search for recipes and add them to my notes.

Speaker 5 And it does just, you know, I simply just ask naturally. I make the requests.
I like to say, please, you do what you want to do. And the new Galaxy S25 Ultra takes care of the rest.

Speaker 5 And then you have Galaxy AI, heard of it?

Speaker 5 Well, that that provides personalized daily briefings to keep you a step ahead it shows your appointments the weather your energy score and more all in one place And of course, the cameras on this phone are incredible.

Speaker 2 You can capture epic detail with a 200, that's right, 200 megapixel camera, or use the new 50 megapixel ultra-wide lens for stunning scenic shots and group photos where you need to get everyone in.

Speaker 5 I know you like 4K because you're a little old school. How about 8K?

Speaker 2 How about 8K?

Speaker 5 You like that resoluch? Well, what can I tell you? That's what we're working with with our Galaxy S25 Ultra.

Speaker 5 And it's got audio eraser with Galaxy AI to really like isolate and reduce unwanted sounds, crowd noises, voices, which for me is super important, especially when I'm recording something that I'm going to throw up on the Gram wherever.

Speaker 5 I really want to make sure that that audio is crisp.

Speaker 2 So, folks, are you ready to let AI do more for you so you can do you? Then get yourself a Galaxy S25 Ultra now at Samsung.com.

Speaker 5 And it has a stylus.

Speaker 5 Certain features compatible with select apps and require Google Gemini account. Results may vary based on input check responses for accuracy.

Speaker 2 Now brief displays daily select information from select apps. May require internet connection.
Audio eraser is compatible with common video formats accessible in gallery.

Speaker 2 Helps Helps minimize six select sounds. Results vary.
Galaxy AI features by Samsung free through 2025 and require Samsung account login.

Speaker 2 This episode of the Good Guys Podcast is brought to you by our friends at Mint Mobile. I don't know about you, but I like keeping my money where I can see it.
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Speaker 7 We are Aaron and Sarah Foster. We have a podcast.
We're here to basically ask you to listen to it.

Speaker 3 We're just trying to help you guys not make the same mistakes that we made in life.

Speaker 3 We made a lot.

Speaker 7 Especially me, I really went down some dark roads. Trying Trying to save you guys from that.
Our podcast is called The World's First Podcast.

Speaker 7 We are technically the sisters behind the Nobody Wants This podcast. It's inspired by us.

Speaker 3 Because you wrote it.

Speaker 7 Yeah, that's true. But when I write, I am inspired by myself all the time.

Speaker 3 Right, that would make sense. You inspire you.

Speaker 7 We're going to wrap this up. Okay.
Guys, go check it out.

Speaker 3 World's First Podcast.

Speaker 5 Why are you so anti-neurologist? Neurology is cool, dude.

Speaker 2 It's one of the rare specialties that will be replaced by AI. Because you're looking at you, radiologist.
You're making me a hypochondriac. I'm fine.
I'm fine.

Speaker 5 No, hypochondriac is people that get worried about fake shit. You should be getting worried about fake fake.

Speaker 2 You're making me think I'm nothing real.

Speaker 5 You're a neglector.

Speaker 2 No, I'm fine. I'm not a neglector.
I take everything. My creatine, my trisepatide, my turmeric, my claritin.
There's too much.

Speaker 5 You need to take a CAT scan.

Speaker 2 I've had it. I've had it.
Oh, I can't wait to watch one day you slipping on this podcast. I'm going to call you out.

Speaker 5 You've gotten me before.

Speaker 2 You know. Yeah, you're right.
Here I am.

Speaker 2 I've gotten you. All right.
So we're not talking about raw milk. Fine.
What else can we talk about that has a best buy date? Wait, what were you doing?

Speaker 5 Were you working in Jackson Hole too?

Speaker 2 In Jacksonville, I had a

Speaker 5 Jacksonville. That's smart.
I don't care.

Speaker 2 I just

Speaker 2 are very, these are very different places to beach.

Speaker 5 Oh, yes. I don't care anymore.
Have you been to Jacksonville, though? I'm sure it's fine.

Speaker 2 All that I have to say is to the great people of Jacksonville, you're lovely. It's an international airport.
It's only an hour and 45 minutes from the city. There is a beach.

Speaker 2 There's just also a lot of dirt and crime and mobile homes, but the beach is lovely. And I don't know why we don't use it more.
It's very close. Just saying.

Speaker 5 Jacksonville's great. And what's great is one of Cat Williams' Netflix specials.
I don't know if he was a little light on material.

Speaker 5 And I only say this because I am one of the biggest Cat Williams fans on earth.

Speaker 2 He's

Speaker 2 nice.

Speaker 5 I think he was recently on Theo Vaughan and he introduced him as some people say he's the black oracle.

Speaker 2 He's spectacular.

Speaker 5 He is a once in a lifetime talent. I love him.
But it was a Netflix special that he shot in Jacksonville. He did 25 minutes at the top of his special crowd work about Jacksonville.

Speaker 5 And I'm like, you know, everyone doesn't live in Jacksonville, right? He's like, he's like, how about Davie Street?

Speaker 2 The crowd loves it.

Speaker 5 But you're like, cat, I can't,

Speaker 2 I don't know what that is. I'm actually, I'm always so impressed, though, when comics are able to do that.
Not in Jacksonville.

Speaker 2 Like, it's cool in Jacksonville, but like when you watch the Schultz stuff and he's in a different fucking country and he's making them laugh because of like random cultural references that he studied, like that's genius level comedy.

Speaker 2 Genius.

Speaker 5 Yeah, it's also just like there is, whenever I would do a college gig, and I've done quite a bit over the years, I would always do recon with the students.

Speaker 5 I'd be like, give me like two inside jokes on campus about like, and I could always like sort of lean on like, where's the bar that you go drink? What's annoying? Let me guess parking.

Speaker 5 As far as I can tell, there's not good parking in any university in the great country of America. They don't like that and they don't like the food.

Speaker 5 And whenever I bring that up in front of the students and I figure out a way to hopefully make it funny, their faces melt. They're like, how the hell?

Speaker 5 How does Josh know about, you know, I don't know, Olivia's here, Bearcat Tuesdays. I don't know.

Speaker 2 Yes.

Speaker 5 Shout out.

Speaker 2 How does he know? I know.

Speaker 5 Like, what would the inside joke be at the yeshiva? Like, can you believe the tefillin on floor 70?

Speaker 2 Speaking of yeshiva, you know my favorite restaurant in the world. Golan Heights.
185th in Amsterdam. This is the place.
I get a call from my parents. Ben, an old family friend passed away.

Speaker 2 We're going to go pay a Shiva call. Would you like to come? We'll get Golan first.
I said, I'm in. I'm in.
It's on the way up. I go.

Speaker 5 Will you explain what a Shiva call is for our three people who listen who aren't Jewish?

Speaker 2 Yes, a Shiva call is what you go to after somebody has passed away. They pass, you bury them in Judaism within 24 hours is the gold standard.

Speaker 2 And then you have a week or a little less than a week where people come in and are able to say hi to you. The body has been buried.
This is not like a wake. The body is not there.

Speaker 2 This is purely in service of memories and to comfort those that just lost a husband, a wife, a son, whatever it may be. They bring food and it's called paying.

Speaker 2 a shiva and yes there's tons of food tons of food you bring whatever you you can.

Speaker 2 But yes, Josh, we stopped at Golan Heights, and this should have been my best fucking bite of the week because Nunies got nothing on Golan. The next time you're here, we're going to Golan.

Speaker 2 I got a Lafa, for those that don't know, big fucking beautiful Pita.

Speaker 5 Jewish burrito. It's a Jewish burrito.

Speaker 2 Jewish burrito, okay? Schnitzel. Beautiful fried chicken.
Love. We then got coleslaw.
We then got thinly sliced pickles. We then got, I know it's crazy, beet salad.
I love beets. No, it's good.

Speaker 2 It works.

Speaker 2 A little corn salad. And then what they got going on, Josh, is these sauces: garlic mayo, sweet chili, barbecue sauce, wrapped up.

Speaker 5 You're ready to go.

Speaker 2 Wild, dog.

Speaker 5 You are a sauce wild, man. Curry mayo and barbecue sauce in your lafa.

Speaker 2 Yo. It was fucking amazing.
And I'm here realizing that the reason I'm

Speaker 2 has nothing to do with nothing to do with the creatine. I had a big week.

Speaker 5 Benton calls me. He's like, I've gained five weight.
Five pounds.

Speaker 2 I think it's from the creatine. And then he elaborates.
Yeah, no, it's not from the creatine. I had a big week.

Speaker 2 But yes, of course, you could go the classic schwarma, lafa, trina, chumous, Israeli salad, onions, et cetera. But if you want to go crazy, they have these gorgeous sauces.
And Josh, oh my God.

Speaker 5 I was thinking about continuing our game from last week twofold, which is we were guessing calories for different wonderful things.

Speaker 2 Oh, yes.

Speaker 5 Now, we did it for donuts, for the Great Krispy Kreme, for the Great Dunkin' Donuts. In fact, I have a good Krispy Kreme story for our stories this week.

Speaker 5 But first, I like to play a game for our calorie counting day.

Speaker 5 How many calories are in

Speaker 5 Chick-fil-A items?

Speaker 5 Olivia, as always, feel free to weigh in. We'll do five of the major Chick-fil-A offerings.

Speaker 2 First,

Speaker 5 their standard chicken sandwich.

Speaker 2 Chicken sandwich.

Speaker 5 Their fried chicken sandwich.

Speaker 2 I was going to say fried. Okay.
Fried. And there's some sauce on this sandwich?

Speaker 2 This is bone dry?

Speaker 5 I don't think they put sauce, right? It's just a pickle.

Speaker 2 Oh, my. I think they put milk.

Speaker 2 It's always less than, I think,

Speaker 2 300.

Speaker 5 300, Olivia.

Speaker 2 425.

Speaker 5 Wow, Olivia, dangerously close at 440.

Speaker 5 440. 300, you guess.
That's a lot.

Speaker 2 Not going to lie. 440, though, is a lot because then you're going to put on that Chick-fil-A sauce.
You're at 800.

Speaker 5 So funny, you should say, how many do we think is in the Chick-fil-A? Sows. All right, 80 calories.
I think it's an ounce. 80 calories.
Olivia.

Speaker 8 110.

Speaker 5 Wow, Olivia again on a winning streak at 140.

Speaker 5 One small pack of chicken. One more Chick-fil-A sauce, 140.

Speaker 2 Yeah, okay.

Speaker 5 A eight-piece nugget, the crispy nugget, eight-piece.

Speaker 2 $4.50. Mmm, Olivia.
$4.10.

Speaker 5 An eight-piece nugget coming in at only 250 calories.

Speaker 2 What the fuck?

Speaker 5 A real steal. A real steal.

Speaker 2 Wait,

Speaker 2 wait. Let's back this up.
Okay. So they're claiming that it's 35 calories a nugget.

Speaker 2 I call bullshit. I'm sorry.
35 calories a nugget? No way. It's deep-fried chicken.

Speaker 5 But they're little nugs. They're not like massive.

Speaker 2 All right. That's true.

Speaker 5 let's just say for variety, how about eight grilled nuggets? What do we think is the calorie count on the eight grilled nuggets?

Speaker 2 If they're the same size as the regular nuggets, sure. 120.

Speaker 8 Yeah, 115.

Speaker 5 Wow, Ben wins this one at 130, a snatched 130.

Speaker 2 That's a nice snack. Really? Go and get an eight-piece grilled nugget.

Speaker 5 Go 12-piece at 200 calories?

Speaker 2 Fantastic.

Speaker 5 38 grams of protein?

Speaker 2 Are you kidding me? Do you know how many people, though, are going in there looking to be healthy and then they're saying, ah, whatever. I'll get a little Chick-fil-A sauce.
It doesn't matter.

Speaker 2 And then all of a sudden, 200 turns into 900 and they don't even know it.

Speaker 5 I know. I'm that guy.

Speaker 2 I am that guy. Just saying.

Speaker 5 I'm constantly playing roulette with my calories. What about a, we can end it here with a, I would have loved a dessert, but I know their ice cream cone is probably coming in at sub 250.

Speaker 5 What about, let's go with a large fry, a large waffle fry.

Speaker 2 425.

Speaker 5 It's coming in at six.

Speaker 5 Sorry, I missed you, Olivia, but it's 600 calories.

Speaker 8 I would have gotten that so wrong.

Speaker 2 Okay, good.

Speaker 2 Work.

Speaker 2 Beautiful.

Speaker 2 This episode of the Good Guys Podcast is brought to you by our friends at Element.

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Speaker 5 Should we get into some stories?

Speaker 2 Yes,

Speaker 2 I have a quick question before the stories, Josh. I just want to know, why did we go away from arranged marriages?

Speaker 5 Olivia?

Speaker 2 No comments.

Speaker 2 You can't tell me with two boys, Josh. You have friends, right? They have a lovely little girl, similar age, and you're really close with them.

Speaker 2 How easy would that be where you get to go to dinner and you get to celebrate holidays with your friends if you just arrange for your little munchkins to marry each other?

Speaker 2 I've been thinking about this, Josh. I've been thinking about this.
It's a shame that you don't have a girl. If you had a girl, then perhaps we could exchange.

Speaker 2 And then all of a sudden, how easy is that? That's all I'm saying. I think that we think too much about the kids.
What do the kids want? Who gives a shit? What do I want?

Speaker 2 I want to be able able to hang out with somebody that i like josh olivia this segment brought to you by the country of iran

Speaker 5 this segment brought to you by the iranian tourism board shout out in tehran we do it a little different

Speaker 5 wait stories i will tell you and you're gonna find this i know you will because you're a beauty and you're just like me you're gonna have your beautiful son and he's gonna be playing with a adorable little girl one day.

Speaker 5 And the parents of whomever, maybe not friends, just the parents will say, oh my God, they're so cute. You never know one day.
And you'll be like, huh?

Speaker 5 And in the back of your mind, you go, never, ever going to happen.

Speaker 2 Never.

Speaker 5 Your little nose picker will never be with my son.

Speaker 2 No, no, never, never. No, our standards are high, Josh.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 They're incredibly high. for our kings.
BH. BH.
Do you know how many people, Josh? Sorry. Do you know how people came up to me in Jacksonville and said, BH? Really?

Speaker 2 Yeah, swear on my life. These are not, these are not Jews, obviously.
No, there are no Jews in Jacksonville. I had like a couple hundred people at a meet and greet.
Everybody, Ben BH, good to see you.

Speaker 2 I'm like, BH? They're like, yeah, you told us to say BH. I'm like, oh, yeah, BH, at least 15.

Speaker 5 I wonder if any of them meant butthole.

Speaker 2 They probably did. They probably did.

Speaker 5 Speaking of, as I mentioned Krispy Kreme earlier, a baby born at Krispy Kreme gets sweet treatment treatment from Donut Chain. It is an experience to remember.
A sweet life ahead.

Speaker 5 A couple's baby was born in a Krispy Kreme parking lot in Alabama during a winter storm, and the Donut Chain made the family in aglazing promise for the future. What? Oh, amazing.

Speaker 2 Fucking up your game, New York Post.

Speaker 5 You're usually good.

Speaker 2 A glazing.

Speaker 5 A woman gave birth to her son in

Speaker 5 the Krispy Kreme parking lot. The couple couldn't make it to the hospital because of a winter storm that had as much as 11 inches of snow pummel parts of the state.

Speaker 5 And Krispy Kreme was closed because of the weather. But, okay, can we get one of Krispy Kreme down?

Speaker 2 Did a closed Krispy Kreme in a snowstorm in Alabama? How'd they get in?

Speaker 5 No, in the parking lot.

Speaker 2 Oh, in the parking lot?

Speaker 5 Yeah, because they had to get off the road. It was snowing so bad.

Speaker 2 Oh, my God. This is a terrible story.
Continue.

Speaker 5 Krispy Kreme is sweetening the families.

Speaker 5 Here we go again. A glazing celebration

Speaker 5 by throwing Dallas a birthday party every year until he's all grown up. And that's going to include plenty of free, delicious donuts.
I mean, they hit the lottery, dude.

Speaker 2 It's nice for sure.

Speaker 2 Great for the kid. That said, they didn't give anything to the mom.

Speaker 2 The mom's the one who, in a snowstorm, had to give birth in a back alley in Alabama outside of a Krispy Kreme, but the son gets free donuts every year. Something's not right, Josh.

Speaker 2 Something's not right.

Speaker 5 I know. And what about like when he's six and he wants to have his birthday at Charles Entertainment Cheese?

Speaker 5 Are they going to say like, yeah, but we didn't give birth to you at a Charles Entertainment Cheese? We're going to the Krispy.

Speaker 2 No, they're going to sign. They signed something already.
Josh doesn't compete.

Speaker 2 One day that kid's going to go to Dunkin' Donuts, eat a Dunkin' Donut, post it on social media, and he's going to get sued.

Speaker 5 Let's hear from who knows? Not me.

Speaker 5 This isn't working. Here we go.

Speaker 9 Hi, good guys. Asking for an opinion on some family drama.
So it turns out that my dad, who managed finances for my mom, lied to her about a few things.

Speaker 9 He said that he paid taxes, in which he did not, for the past five years. He also has accrued $40,000 in debt that she was unaware of.

Speaker 9 And thinking that they were doing really well with their finances, she comes to learn that they're not.

Speaker 9 Now, my dad is not the healthiest man, so I'm trying to balance how do I make sure that I maintain some sort of relationship with him before he unfortunately passes away, but also how do I hold him accountable for all the pain that he caused my mom?

Speaker 9 Cause she is my ride or die. Looking for advice and opinions.
Love the pod. Thanks.

Speaker 2 You love the pod and you bring us this sad story. What am I supposed to do with this, Josh? I'm depressed.

Speaker 2 You have a dying father who fucked up, but he, look, when people make mistakes like that, all I'm going to say is it sucks.

Speaker 2 It doesn't make him a bad person. I don't know him.
I don't know him. All I know is that clearly the guy was in some hot water.
If he's dying, love him and try and help your mom. But if he's dying,

Speaker 2 he's going to die. Don't make his last day on earth.
Of course, you should say to him, like, dad, you fucked up. This is no good.
I'm going to help mom. But then transition.
Don't harbor resentment.

Speaker 2 Be there for him. Let him pass.
And then be there to help your mom recover. Because it's terrible what he did.
It's terrible. I have to assume that there's some reason.

Speaker 2 Also, we don't know enough about the story. The mom thought that they were doing so well on their finances, but she hasn't checked to see if anybody filed a tax return in five years.

Speaker 2 She hasn't talked to the accountant. I'm not blaming her by any means.
No means whatsoever. I'm just saying she sounds rather disconnected.
And if the guy is dying, I don't know.

Speaker 2 We don't know enough of this story, but if somebody's dying, I think you forgive them. Otherwise,

Speaker 2 you'll hate yourself forever.

Speaker 2 Totally agree.

Speaker 5 I totally understand her outrage. Anyone who doesn't file their taxes for five years years and keeps it a secret and accrues $40,000 in debt, it's a real, your dad's a sick fuck.

Speaker 2 He's sick.

Speaker 5 It's okay. He's just, he's one of your nuts.

Speaker 5 And so try to have the same sympathy and grace that you would have for another sick person. And yeah, you can't not pay your taxes.
You also, they'll get you and then you can't BQ on that.

Speaker 5 Like when you owe the IRS, they will get their money forever. All that being said, I agree with Ben.

Speaker 5 And I also think I understand you wanting to be defensive of your ride or die, your mom who you love so much, and it's a beautiful thing.

Speaker 5 She's a big girl, and so are you. And I would do your best to keep that separate, you know? So, yes, you are entitled and 100% need to feel this.

Speaker 5 And no, and this is one of the great things I've learned in sobriety is we learn to live with unresolved issues.

Speaker 5 We sometimes never get the resolution we want and we don't get the amends we think we deserve, but we do the best we can because that's life on life's terms.

Speaker 5 So, you know, I could imagine a scenario where your dad never even like apologizes about it. Cause unfortunately, people have their weird justifications for things that they do.
But I agree.

Speaker 5 I don't think you'll regret loving him in the end. And you might regret sticking it to him till the end.

Speaker 2 It doesn't help anybody. Yeah.
That's my perspective. Like harboring resentment only hurts you.
If you're trying to hurt him, it's a different story.

Speaker 2 But if it sounds like you love him and you're sad that he's dying, that's what I took from that, Josh. Yeah.
So if that's true, then you cutting it out. It's only hurting you.
Don't hurt you more.

Speaker 5 Totally.

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Speaker 5 Another one.

Speaker 10 Hey, good guys. Love you so much.
Josh Mazzletub on the new baby.

Speaker 10 And Ben, how are you? I wanted to ask you how you are because in the last episode, you said that you would like to start hearing asking us asking you how you are in the speak pipes.

Speaker 10 Anyway, I have a question for you. Something that I want to know your take on.
So my boyfriend is Jewish and as am I

Speaker 10 and he has a younger sister who she is 16.

Speaker 10 And she, when she was 13, she had a bot mitzvah. She had like the huge, you know, blowout party.
you know, how they do it now with the up-and-coming.

Speaker 10 They do a party. These 13-year-olds.

Speaker 2 So

Speaker 10 she had the big bot mitzvah. And then now she's 16.
And

Speaker 10 she is saying that she needs to have a, or she's turning.

Speaker 2 There's the galaxy of the city. She's saying she needs to have 16.

Speaker 10 And honestly, like, I just think that's absurd.

Speaker 2 Like, I think that objectively, if you don't have a bot mitzvah, cut it off. I got it.

Speaker 2 I got it. I got it.

Speaker 5 I'm playing it for two reasons. This is an example of the way you don't want to go about a speak pipe.
This is

Speaker 2 so long.

Speaker 2 So long.

Speaker 5 So unnecessary. Could have easily cut out 60 seconds of that.

Speaker 2 I honestly, I could tell the entire speak pipe, Josh, in under five seconds. You ready for this? Yeah.
You ready for this? My sister, when she was 13, had a bot mitzvah, crazy big party.

Speaker 2 Isn't it crazy that she also wants a sweet 16? Perfect. That's it.
That was the entire thing that said, love you. Thank you for calling in.
We appreciate you. But like, oh, you stink

Speaker 5 pipes, but thank you and we love you. And we would hate to lose you, but you're horrible.

Speaker 2 You can't speak pops. You cannot have, you cannot, not that you cannot have.
You can have as many parties as you'd like.

Speaker 2 But Sweet 16s are definitely not a, in my opinion, you just had a blowout party. You don't need two blowout parties within three years.

Speaker 2 So I personally agree that if you had a big blowout bot mitzvah, you can probably skip the big blowout suite 16. But if you have means and you love to party, why not to each their own? Josh?

Speaker 5 I completely agree with you. I think it's ridiculous.
The idea of having two massive parties in a row. I think you can definitely make it special.

Speaker 5 But I think if the bot mitzvah is at the shul and the hall and the DJ and the stations and the thing, you go for 16, we're going to do something amazing in the backyard.

Speaker 5 Totally. and we're going to spend you know a tenth of what we did on the bot mitzvah.
Like, maybe there's some world. And what were you going to say?

Speaker 2 What are the origins, Josh, of the Sweet 16? Do we know? That's a great question. Let's see.
We have the internet. Why don't you use the AI feature, Josh, on that galaxy?

Speaker 5 Try and stop me.

Speaker 2 Try and use Gemini voice to speak. You can try and stop me, but it won't work.
What are the origins

Speaker 2 of Sweet 16?

Speaker 5 oh i just got uh transferred to the fbi i heard some googling something to do with 16 year olds the term sweet 16 has multiple origins the celebration may have originated with queen elizabeth i whose reign marked the beginning of the middle ages it may also have originated as a way to introduce girls to social skills and host the scene now what about a quin senior josh the difference between a sweet 16 and a quin senior but that's beautifully cultural and that's 15.

Speaker 2 15 okay

Speaker 2 also 16. quincei oh i didn't even realize quince

Speaker 2 yeah that's nice i agree that seems like you're also

Speaker 2 welcoming her into girlhood is that the idea because if that's all of these ideas that's what a bat mitzvah is okay so we've come full circle here you want a bat mitzvah no sweet 16.

Speaker 2 Does it no, you did it. It's done.
You're a woman. Olivia?

Speaker 8 Yeah, it seems like double dipping a little bit. But I also agree with your point, Josh, that like you can do one up real big and then do one, you know, a little smaller on a budget to celebrate.

Speaker 8 But yeah, it seems like a little bit of a double dip there.

Speaker 2 I guess it depends on how rich you are. Like if you're really rich,

Speaker 2 Josh, you could have a quinceanera. I would love.

Speaker 5 Oh my God, a posh, like, you know, why not? A couple decades late, Kinsei. You know, I don't want to, I don't want to stick my foot in my mouth 13 years in advance because BHBH,

Speaker 5 you guys have a freaking blowout bar mitzvah for the soccer to be named.

Speaker 5 And tell me what you think, Ben. Like, I think Bar Mitchva is awesome.
I think growing up during our, you know, during the 90s and the mid-aughts, like, of course, there were always the blowouts.

Speaker 5 There was always the rich families that went over the top. Then there were wonderfully modest ones.

Speaker 5 I just have experience in the last 10 years, I feel like I'm seeing people drop a quarter of a million dollars on bar mitzvahs. Like it's insane to me.
It's a little woody and nuts. What do you think?

Speaker 2 One, I'm going to go hard as fuck.

Speaker 5 But is that for you?

Speaker 2 I don't know because I'm also the king of bartering. Like I'm going to have the biggest fucking party.
You're never going to know what I spent. You'll know what I spent.

Speaker 2 But you who came, you'll never know what I spent. You're going to think I spent something insane.
And I'm sure I spent a lot, but I didn't spend what you think I spent. And that to me is the win.

Speaker 2 I don't mind spending money, but I want it to feel like what I got was worth way more. Does that make sense?

Speaker 2 I just want a good deal. So if I need to spend, hope God willing, I can, God willing, things keep going well.

Speaker 2 If I wanted to spend a quarter of a million dollars on a bar mitzvah, then this will be a $1 million bar mitzvah. Okay.
That's all.

Speaker 5 But is that reasonable? Like you would consider spending that much money?

Speaker 2 Is it reasonable? No, no, not at all. But I love parties.

Speaker 2 I love throwing parties. I love hosting.
I love a really amazing, fun event. And I could absolutely see myself getting caught up in it as the son of a caterer.
I can just see it.

Speaker 2 And like, I love events. Like, I've always, I've always loved them.
And I don't ever mind spending money. Like, I'll always throw.

Speaker 2 Like, it's been less in past years, but like, I would, I would spend money on my birthday for my friends. Like, I would like rent a room.
I would like pick up a cab. Like, I like that stuff.

Speaker 2 So, like, I envision that on like a monumental day for my son, $250,000 is an absurd amount of money. So I want to kind of

Speaker 2 adjusting for inflation, maybe it won't be as crazy, but $100,000 for a million dollar wedding would be, would be lovely. The performers, Josh, that's where it gets

Speaker 2 big. Like I want, I want the best meatloaf cover band there is.
Maybe I get nickel back.

Speaker 5 That would be so hot.

Speaker 2 If I get like 55-year-old nickel back.

Speaker 5 She she give this like your son a beautiful Jewish name.

Speaker 2 So it's like, look at Orange photograph.

Speaker 2 Have a bomb is for to you.

Speaker 5 Giving nachas to your parents, too.

Speaker 2 Very good.

Speaker 5 Very good. God bless.
I don't know. I have, I want to separate this and not be, because I think everything you said sounds great and is perfect and is how a lot of people think.

Speaker 5 And I think it's their own, Josh.

Speaker 2 It's fine. You go to each their own.

Speaker 5 Yeah, I have my own nuts things that I feel like, first of all, and I think this is like a little bit of growing up with a mother who made things about, who made things about her, but told me it was about me.

Speaker 5 Like, I see a lot of, like, for my bar mitzvah, I wanted my theme to be Star Wars.

Speaker 2 And she's like, ah, ah, Broadway, baby.

Speaker 2 I was like, I'm embarrassed.

Speaker 5 And she's like, we're performing at your bar mitzvah.

Speaker 2 I said, we are. And it turned into a 45-minute show.

Speaker 2 You have bar mitzvah trauma. You do.

Speaker 5 Well, to say the least. But again, like to your point, right? Like, I know you're joking, but like the meatloaf cover band and this.
And like, you didn't say a thing about your kid.

Speaker 2 It was all about you.

Speaker 5 And I think parents do that. And I don't, I, I guess that's what I have qualms with.

Speaker 2 Unless you're owning it. I'm not saying that it's for him at all.
But it is. But it's, no, the whole day was.

Speaker 2 The service was.

Speaker 2 The luncheon was. Of course, him coming out and it being his theme.
Like, I remember my bar mitzvah was Nick's themed because I love the Knicks.

Speaker 2 My parents found a way to get Jon Starks to record a nice video for me thanking, saying I did a great job on my Hoftorah on the fourth floor of where my dad had catered.

Speaker 2 They put like a little basketball court or whatever, and the kids played. And downstairs, the parents did what they did, and I was happy as a clam.

Speaker 2 And that's obviously not nowhere near a quarter of a million dollar bar mitzvah.

Speaker 2 That was like a, I have no idea how much because, again, they're caterers and florists and the space was free and all this stuff. But I just, the party itself is for the family.

Speaker 2 That's what I think when I think of a bar mitzvah. A wedding, the polar opposite.
That's about the couple. That's about the couple and whatever the couple wants to do.

Speaker 2 Their list, it shouldn't be about the parents. The parents far too much.
Get involved, invite all of their friends, and it becomes nothing about the bride, which is the worst thing.

Speaker 5 But for me, bar mitzvahs are about, or bot mitzvahs are about the kids going, studying, sharing with the world, feeling good about themselves and then the parties just for everyone is the way i see it and what do you think about like you know because this happens sometimes where like you and claudia are so wonderfully like you know you just have incredible personalities and you're so like such people people and outgoing and and maybe you have a kid who's a little you know more shy and like a little bit more introverted and what if they say like dad i would love to do the entire bar mitzvah process in Hebrew school and whatnot and I'd rather just like go to Israel or like do something like a trip and not a party.

Speaker 2 Then that is what we will do. Cool.
I mean

Speaker 2 I can't imagine a world in which we raise an introvert. But if we happen to raise an introvert, then a thousand percent it's what the kid wants.
No question.

Speaker 2 I hate those scenarios where parents force their kids into doing something that they don't want to do. But I am banking on having a kid that wants to have a great party for sure.

Speaker 5 No, and a great party is awesome. And I, what has been revealed to me with having, and you, you see this once you have more than one kid, is nurture is as real as nature.

Speaker 5 And because both of my kids are singularly my children and yet completely different. And it doesn't make sense.
And yet it makes perfect sense.

Speaker 5 How they can be like so uniquely my wife and mine and have our parts of our looks and parts of our personality traits and things that we love and things that we don't love.

Speaker 5 And yet they are so uniquely themselves. That was just done in the beautiful miracle of their

Speaker 2 so cool.

Speaker 5 Yeah, it's fun. It's cool to see how it reveals itself.
Okay, you want to do what are you nuts?

Speaker 2 What are you nuts, Josh? Times Square. Okay, it's completely nuts.
It's nuts. Granted, we have our gorgeous billboard.
I love it. You set foot in Times Square.

Speaker 2 One, you're afraid for your life a thousand percent. It is like the

Speaker 2 craziest people, the most lights.

Speaker 2 like it's it's a jungle. It's nuts.
If you've never been, it's crazy. You get there, there is always somebody on a megaphone talking about Jesus.

Speaker 2 Without question, somebody is screaming, screaming at you about Jesus. You walk another foot, you are met with a Mickey mouse that is just the scariest Mickey you have ever seen.

Speaker 2 You're blinded, you're getting a headache. I was recently in Times Square, so I'm thinking about it.
And I just have to say, this being a tourist attraction, what are you, nuts?

Speaker 2 There's nothing to see. Google it.
You don't want it.

Speaker 5 Totally agree. My what are you nuts is if you sign an email, a letter, a text, with love and light,

Speaker 5 with health and healing, with healing love that is also light that lights you up, babe. What are you nuts? How about sincerely?

Speaker 2 How about best?

Speaker 5 Save it.

Speaker 2 Save your love.

Speaker 5 Save your light. Take your health.

Speaker 2 Take your healing and keep it to yourself. Okay?

Speaker 2 Just when you're nuts, it's nuts.

Speaker 5 Nuts.

Speaker 2 I love best. I'm a big best guy.
Best. Best is the best.
How about that? It's so easy. Thanks.
Thanks works too.

Speaker 5 Thanks.

Speaker 5 Best.

Speaker 2 But best if you want to be a little bit creative. Thanks, of course.
No question. No question.

Speaker 2 Best. Try a best.

Speaker 5 Try a love.

Speaker 2 With love is no good.

Speaker 5 Or just love.

Speaker 2 Love is okay, but you're sending mixed signals. You're talking to a coworker.

Speaker 5 No, you can't write that. But, you know, you never know.
Love Jay.

Speaker 2 Love Jay. And you know what else I love, Josh? This podcast.
Rate it five stars. Otherwise, what are you, nuts? Listen to us on Apple, Spotify, wherever you get your podcasts.
Watch us on YouTube.

Speaker 2 Watch our clips on Instagram and TikTok. We're cross-platform, baby.
Follow us on one. You're missing out.
Follow us on all. You're getting all, okay? You're getting all.
Mondays and Thursdays, folks.

Speaker 2 We will see you next time.

Speaker 11 Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services.

Speaker 11 Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.