FREEDOM!! GIVING VOICE TO THE WOMEN OF IRAN

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Hi, guys.

Welcome to Cat on the Lose.

This is a very special episode because you guys that listen to my podcast know most of my episodes are fun and silly.

We make fun of all kinds of dating relationship situations, but today I want to shed light in a topic that I think is so important to women all over the world.

I want to talk about

what Iranian women face to this day in Iran.

And I brought a very special guest.

She's one of my best friends in this world.

She's a very special woman.

She's incredibly successful.

She's the owner of one of the top luxury concierge companies in the world, Privé LA.

So, let me introduce her first of all.

Hi, Maj.

Hi, guys.

Happy to be back.

I know.

Thank you for doing this.

But this time, I know you've done Canon de Loose before, but it was always fun and silly.

But because you were born in Iran and you came to the United States with your family very young, I invited you to talk about the situation that women still face in that country and I can only imagine how heartbreaking must be for you when you see the news and you were kind enough to say yes let's do it.

Yes.

So we're doing an audio and video episode and before I get started this is what I want to mention to put this in context.

You and I are business women.

We

most of the time we take for granted the most simple things that we do like today we are on a one-night business trip thanks to you, thanks to Privelet.

We are in a gorgeous, gorgeous, gorgeous, magical place

called

Elsewhere,

which is a hidden, adorable, to-die-for.

I don't even know if I call it a hotel, right?

It's like a little hidden-away place.

Yeah.

And it's insanely beautiful.

It's nature, nature, nature.

It's so peaceful here.

No television.

We're staying in a gorgeous bungalow.

And if you see the videos, you think like like we're in the middle of nowhere, but we're literally like 10 minutes from Malibu, but it's incredibly nice to be here.

So, thanks for bringing us.

My pleasure.

And, as like I was gonna say, the little things like traveling and doing whatever the hell we want, like basically getting in our car and going places, saying whatever we want, deciding who is gonna be our client, sleeping away from home, whether or not we are married, breaking up with a boyfriend, dating multiple people, whatever it is that we want to do, and dressing, right?

Which is always a hot topic because of social media.

If we want to dress sexy, we can dress sexy.

If you don't want to show your body, don't show your body.

But if you want to show your body, we can do whatever we want in this country.

That's one of the biggest blessings for all of us that live in the United States and most countries out there listening to this podcast.

It's not the case in Iran, correct?

Correct.

So let's start with that.

I saw a few days ago, because I honestly don't know a lot, and ever since we became such good friends, I mean, the population of

Iranian people in Los Angeles is huge.

I have a lot of friends from Iran, but to be completely honest, I never really paid a lot of attention to it.

I know bits and pieces of what's going on there.

But once we became such close friends, I'm like, okay, I want to learn more.

And I do have other dear friends from Iran, but you're a woman and you're my dear friend.

I'm like, like I need to learn more about what's going on and a few days ago I saw in the news that there is a new government or the government you can help and explain to us what's going on now and there were like three ladies on the beach covered head to toe

in how do you call that I was just yeah

how do you call hijab hijab

And they said that the new government one year after

what happened with the movement with mahso amini which i'm sure the everyone knows the entire world knows about that movement it was like a few

few i would say like yeah it was a couple of months ago

actually my apologies it was a few months ago started in september and um

and after that movement they in they're enforcing a new again they're enforcing a new law so they go back okay so how how does this work?

Because I think it was one year ago that that girl got murdered.

It was about, yeah.

She was protesting.

It's an interesting time.

It's been a year.

Wow.

Right.

It's going to be a year in September.

It's going to be a year in September.

She was protesting.

And I want to make this very clear.

That's one thing that our journalists...

She wasn't actually protesting.

She was actually visiting from a she was living in the small city in one of the cities in Iran and she was visiting the capital, which is Tehran, Tehran was visiting with her family and some of this

they call them like a separate or like a

enforce like they deal with hijab and you know controlling they are the

yeah they enforce social codes

so to speak right yes yes and they approach her and they told her your hijab is not really like

appropriate and which is surprising because like in Tehran in the capital, like the girls, the way they wear their hijab, it's like so open and it's not really covered, you know, they don't really cover as much to be quite honest.

And I don't know why they pick on her.

Maybe she talked back to them, and that the whole thing started.

And then she

went.

She got arrested and

she got killed.

Yes.

It's a mystery.

But she died in the hands of the police.

Her name was, and tell me how to pronounce, because I hate mispronouncing names, Maza Maza.

Mazza Amini.

Mazza Amini.

Yeah, I love the, and I love pronouncing the names, and I'm learning as we go.

She died, and there were so many protests all over the world.

And as time goes by, the protests kind of die down, and then nobody talks about it.

Do you think this is the main reason why now they're

making laws even more strict because the media is not paying attention again?

Yes,

the Iranian government is so complex, and

you know,

I mean,

first of all, I think this is something I wanted to make it more clear to the people or to the audience, whoever is listening to this, that have not enough knowledge about Iran, the history, the culture, you know, and it makes me really upset because,

you know, people be judged based on what they see on TV or hear on media, you know, and kind of like

everything they see or hear that's not the truth.

And we know that about media, you know, so,

you know, I mean, if, if, if, if, you know, if you know about Iran, Iran or Persia, the Persian Empire, you know, been in Iran forever and ever, and it was one of the first countries exist.

I, I mean, maybe don't come attack me, guys.

Maybe Egypt was like after, you know, so, but we're not here to give you a hint of it.

No, like, full disclosure.

Yeah, I said to you before we started the podcast, you're not a diplomat.

You don't have to know anything.

Yeah.

You came to the United States when you were very young with your parents, but of course, you were born there.

It's your people.

It's your family.

Yes.

So this is why I want to try to clarify this because even for me, I'm not from Iran.

I do come from a country.

Luckily, it's a very free country, but it's a country of horrific, horrific crimes and horrific scandals and a disgusting government that i don't even want to talk about it and it breaks my heart when i watch the news so i can imagine for you when you watch the news and you see this the woman die and the these ladies have to be covered head to toe and there is all this enforcement it must make you feel

some kind of i don't know pain or whatever feeling it is towards your culture yeah i mean what makes me this

you know sad, I would say like it makes me the most upset is honestly it's just obviously not her job so much it's about the whole like what happened after the revolution and

sort of I don't know if I should say that but I'm going to because this is a free country yeah

so I mean

again I wasn't born at the time but based on the you know books I read you know and my parents and you know talking to

you know people have more knowledge about the history of my country.

They're older than me.

So, based on that,

this is what I heard is when the

Shah of Iran was

at the time was in Iran and he was ruling the country.

And

he was I mean, I wouldn't say he was doing a fantastic job, but he, you know, he was a great leader.

You know, we were kind of they call it the European Middle East and European country.

We're like a friends in the Middle East, you know, in Iran.

And unfortunately,

the other countries, like US, England, and France had an involvement on removing Shah because they didn't want Iran to be a very powerful country in the Middle East because it was a big, you know, threatening thing for the other countries I just mentioned.

So

I think,

so that's why they wanted to replace the Shah of Iran.

And before the revolution, revolution, there was no hijab.

We were just like any European country.

Oh, really?

I think that's something that most people don't know at all.

I do not know that.

Yeah.

It was 45 years ago, 1979, when the revolution happened in Iran.

And

we were with like kind of like the England, you know, king and queens.

And, you know, we didn't have hijab.

It was none of this bullshit.

Just like any other country, European countries, you know, know and or

and after the revolution happened this new government came and another thing is like a lot of people think iranians are arab which

i mean love to all my misconceptions yeah love to all my

you know arab uh friends and family and you know we're just not arab or we don't speak the same language we speak farsi you know and our religion our first religion wasn't even muslim it was orastian

And it changed, you know, after the Arab came to Iran and war happens, and then, you know,

and then they brought Islam and Muslim.

So after the revolution is when the laws changed.

The government, new government, the new government.

New government came Islamic Republic of Iran.

And the new government, then they enforced hijab, you know, and

a lot more things, right?

It's not a country.

So this is what I want to shed light light on.

To this day, so after the revolution, that was a long time ago, a few decades ago, to this day, women are not free to do whatever they want in several aspects, correct?

Yes.

For example, I don't know if it's true or not, but just a few things that I was reading last night and trying to figure out.

By the way, yeah, before I forget, I want to mention,

we don't know exactly what happened, but the women that

were protesting in Iran and the protest in Iran, they make one thing very clear.

They are not even protesting against the government, they're literally just protesting to have more rights and more freedom.

It's more about their more rights and their freedom.

It's nothing to do with the government.

With the government, well, we don't want

we don't want this government, right?

Right, right.

But again, we need to because this is exactly what happened.

There was like, I mean, I don't think the Iranian people with the reason the Shah left, they was was part of it, but I think there was bigger power behind it for that movement.

So it's the same thing.

You know, we need to make, we need to know who is going to be replacing the new government because, you know, once you don't have a government, a lot of things can happen to the country, you know.

And

obviously, we don't want things to get worse, you know, not, but definitely Iranian people.

I'm not speaking of all Iranian people, but the majority of I know, they don't want this government.

And there's a lot happening, people don't know, even the media cannot cover, you know, what's happening.

So, how is the okay, let's start one thing at a time.

Yeah, how is the me, is the media free there, or is

the government controls it?

Of course, they control it.

So, they control what people listen to, they control what they see on the internet, kind of like China does, Russia.

Yes, so they block a lot of things

to control it.

That's yeah, I think that's heartbreaking

because when you keep people from being informed, they start living like a lot of them in their own world, and that's horrible.

How is communication?

Do you and your family still have relatives there?

I do have, yes, I do have family, yeah, I do, families, friends.

I mean, I can give you guys a couple of examples.

Like, you know, these are real true stories.

You know, a few years ago, it was another movement happened.

I think it was, I think it was the green movement.

If you follow

about Iran, you heard about that movement.

And it was a similar thing.

This really young girl, she got killed in the protesting.

It was about like all the students from the university started that movement, if I'm not mistaken.

It was a long time ago.

And actually, one of my friends,

his brother, got killed

in the protest.

And

this is not making it up, this is a true story.

And,

you know, they couldn't.

And he, he wasn't even actually protesting.

He was just like walking the same like an innocent.

Yeah, and it's a victim.

And then he got arrested.

And then

what they put, what happened, you know, what they really, the family went through, I cannot even tell you guys.

It was just heartbroken.

Again, I still thinking about it makes me want to cry.

And like

they wouldn't even show their son, you know, their

dead body, you know.

And when they did, I can't imagine what they did to him in terms of like abusing him and couldn't even like, you know, recognize the face.

Wow.

And, and it is heartbreaking.

It's, it's, it's so,

and, and he didn't do anything.

You know, yeah, but once like like like the girl that got killed last year, uh once you're in the hands of this government,

apparently they're not listening to you.

They don't care if you did it or not, right?

Yes.

So, but the people that are.

I mean, I have to say, I feel like any country, if they just, even in the U.S., if people go and protest against the government tomorrow, I mean, there will be some enforcement.

You know, there will be some.

But I guess like, but we like to believe

here, it's like a little more.

I'm sure they beat the shit out of the city.

Some people, you can't just say this is just happening in Iran.

Like when

the African

George Floyd happened,

of course there is there is an insane violence in the United States as well.

I completely agree with you.

There is things that are horribly unfair.

Yeah.

It's a little different there because it's

but but the people have less power

to control what happens to them.

But the b your friends or family that are there, there yeah is it easy like to call them and say hi how you doing you can talk obviously you have to be careful what you say but can you do they have like whatsapp what's up social media oh yeah i mean here's another

thing they want here's another thing about iran maybe you guys don't know like iran is the center of fashion if you see the girls and guys the way they dress we have like the the type of cars they these people drive and everything there you have to you have to buy cash there's no credit card oh really there's no loans So if you buy in a so either you have cash or not.

Yes.

Like if you buy in a Ferrari, like, you know, you pay cash.

If you buy in a mention, you buy cash.

Like, it's like people have some serious money there, you know?

And like, it's like the underground parties I've been and seen in Iran, never even seen it in LA.

So they're very bougie.

Oh, my God.

Very bougie.

You know, there is a whole another word people don't even think about it.

It exists in Iran in terms of Iranian people are like they want to have the best thing of everything, you know, in terms of you know, design, in terms of cars, you know, fashion, you know,

it's you know, they're in tune with what's going on, exactly.

But, like, okay, so let's say Instagram, social media, can they post?

Because let's say the girls, they, like you said, they buy a fabulous outfit, they do, they do.

Can they post?

Oh, look at this outfit, everything without the sorry, how do you say it?

Hijab, hijab, yeah, without the hijab.

Can they post?

They post.

They do post.

But is it allowed?

No, it's not allowed, but they post.

But are they afraid, like, if they see something's gonna happen to you?

Because they can't find you, right?

Absolutely.

And also, like,

every time there's a movement happening in Iran, they filter the Instagram.

And also, they cut off, they cut off, like, the communications and the internet on people.

Oh, my God.

You know, so, yes, it's a lot of unfair,

you know.

Yeah.

So, what is the law now?

Do you know women, the minute they go walk out of the house, they need to be covered head to toe?

Uh, they have to be covered.

I, this is something it just came out a few days ago.

Honestly, I haven't had a chance to like do more research and call my friends, but

I mean,

I don't know.

I mean, we were hoping

for this government to leave, you know, after this movement.

Um, a lot of people, obviously, in the U.S.

and the

son of the

previous Shah lives in the US.

And he was starting some movements and trying to have him back.

But there's a, you know,

not necessarily like I think people want to have the king and queen kind of, you know, they want to have just the president.

And they don't, I don't think they want to be kind of like England again that we had previously, you know.

So

unfortunately, one thing about my culture is like people, they can't agree on a lot of things and everybody's just looking for power and money and what they can get instead of thinking about, like, you know, caring about the country and actually

making sure, like, because in this government, literally selling the country, literally selling the Caspian Sea to Russia, selling the other part to China, you know, it's ridiculous because they don't care, because they're not Persian.

Like, some of this government, they're Arab, you know, which, which, again, I'm just saying.

You're not saying you don't have anything against the country.

I don't have against that.

I'm just saying

they're not Iranian, so they don't have that blood and care about the country.

You know, they don't give a shit.

They just want to collect money.

And I mean, they're billionaires, like the government from Iran.

Oh, my God.

So, okay,

they gotta, but in general, they gotta leave the house covered.

Correct.

They can't show their hair in public, right?

And they do, but obviously, they can get in.

Yes.

Yeah, they can get in trouble.

And how about

I'm not sure exactly what the law is, but I also read something like:

if they're married,

basically, the husband determines everything they do.

Like, if you get caught, I don't even think any Iranian woman would have the boss because if you get caught cheating, they still have those

really,

really, really old.

I think

they call it like a stone.

Yes, they're still stone that

is like so middle-aged.

Yeah, I think it's that.

I think even when you get divorced, unfortunately, like even if you have a young kid, the kid cannot like after I think after a certain age has to go with the dad.

There's nothing in Iran, honestly, protecting women law.

Can women go out alone?

Like you and me, we go out.

Yes.

Can they like go out to lunch, dinner with their girlfriends and everything?

All of that.

Can they travel alone?

Yeah.

So it's not like the most strict

country.

No, there's other countries that are more strict.

They're more

Way more strict.

Yeah, so people cannot get divorced.

Like, if a couple is having an unhappy marriage, is there a law that people can get divorced or not?

Yes, of course.

Oh, so they can?

Yes, yes.

Oh, okay.

Because I read something about that.

Because, like I said, there's so much misinformation on the internet that, like you said, people don't even understand what's going on.

And Iran has like the highest, like most educated people.

Most of the people that want to have top educations and have been to the best universities.

So, can a girl from Iran?

Let's say you have a friend there and she wants to come visit you in California.

Can she come?

If they gave her a visa, yeah, she can come.

So, but there is no law in Iran that tells you

you cannot come to the U.S.

She can literally get a passport and she can travel.

Well, they have to give her a visa, you have to go through the immigration, yeah, whatever.

But now, yeah, of course.

Yeah, after our break, I want to ask you how your parents got here.

And because you were very little, you and your brother were.

I was in, I was not little, you were seven right 17 17 no so I wasn't so little so you have a lot of memories from being there yeah from being so but I want to we're gonna take a two minute break and I wanna ask you about that and then

I wanna delve into the cultural differences because I can only imagine a 17 year old beautiful girl from Iran coming and I mean you didn't come to LA you went to Washington DC first but regardless it must have been such a culture shock yeah So, I want to do like this little game and talk about a few things that we do here and how we date and how we relate

to people and everything.

And maybe you can help.

Because, like I said, I think so many times, of course, there's a lot of shit here that I don't agree with, but we take for granted a lot of things that we do every single day.

Small things like, you know, we are very fortunate and lucky, which they don't have that opportunities, you know.

Yes, a lot of things happen under the ground, you know, like you know, but like not, it's not legal, yeah.

So, um, and having that fear, you know, I remember that, which we can talk about it after the break, going to the parties, and like dress like a certain way.

You have something that something's gonna happen to you.

Yeah, it takes a while,

having that fear and anxiety.

It's not, I think, we all, I mean, I still maybe sometimes, you know, not now, I think you came along.

Yeah, I don't know, yeah, but it's kind of like me, as much as I grew up 90% of the time here, every time I went back to Brazil, and I was a victim of horrific violence in Brazil.

That's a whole other episode.

But for so many years, even when I was here in the United States, I was always

terrified, like something's gonna happen to me, like lock the door.

It's like, yeah, like it's almost like a back memory comes back.

I mean, definitely

I had some trauma, and yeah, it's it takes a long time, it's a process.

And I have to say,

just the time we've been together, you are so good at pushing forward and getting out of your shell more and more in so many things that we're going to talk about after the break.

So I'm very proud of you and I'm very honored that you're here today

talking about such an important issue, the difference between how we live here in the United States and many countries in the world, by the way, and what the women of Iran still have to put up with, which is insane.

Not just the woman in Iran,

women in Afghanistan.

You You know, there's so many.

No, there are so many countries.

We're specifically talking about Iran today because you are from Iran and Iran was in the news this week.

But yes, as sad as it is, there are so many countries that treat women like property.

We'll be right back.

This is a very interesting, serious,

great conversation with Maj de Bahemin.

She's the owner, CEO, founder of Prevele, the top luxury concierge company in the world.

She's crazy successful, insanely beautiful.

If you guys are doing the audio episode, please go see the video episode.

The video episode is available on Spotify only, but go check it out because she's a sweetheart.

Like, you look, you still look like you're 70, but you're not.

And you're kicking ass

and naming names, but you have this really sweet side of you.

And I really appreciate you doing this with us.

We'll be right back.

Okay, so now you guys know that I am interviewing a very, very dear friend, Maj de Bahamin.

She's the owner, founder, CEO of one of the top luxury concierge services in the world, Privé LA, P-R-I-V-E-E-L-A Luxury Concierge.

We became dear friends.

We started as business partners, we had a business relationship, and we became really close friends because she has the same work ethic.

She's a major workaholic as am I.

And this is why I love Privé so much.

They have incredible access to so many things that most people, such as myself, don't even know exist, such as this place that we are here spending the night to record the podcast.

It's literally 10 minutes away from Malibu, and you feel like you're in this incredible nature reserve.

It's in the heart of Topanga Canyon.

It is so beautiful, so exclusive.

And they have access to places such as this one all over the world.

Same thing when it comes to difficult to get reservations.

If you want to go to a concert, if you want VIP experiences, like for example, now she's sending some of her clients to Deandre Bocelli concert in Italy.

She can organize meet and greets.

I mean, things that if you go online and try to book yourself, you are not going to be able to find.

If you want incredible houses, mansions, check out their website, their website and their Instagram, Privé LA Luxury Concierge.

If you want an amazing location, like a beautiful home, such as an event that I was invited by her for one of her clients like a week ago, this gorgeous, gorgeous house in Beverly Hills.

If you want a wedding venue, anything you can think of, not only in the United States, but anywhere in the world, they get it done for you with incredible, incredible attention, 24/7 VIP service.

So if you're interested in unlocking this incredible world of beautiful, beautiful experiences and places, luxury vacations, reach out to them.

Again, the Instagram is Privé LA Luxury Concierge on the internet, private LA.com or send them an email info at Privile

P-R-I-V-E-E-L-A dot com.

And today's episode, we're talking about such an important topic, which is women's freedom.

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okay we're back for this super important conversation with maje she was born in iran she came with her family her parents and her brother to the united states when you were 17 and your parents settled in around washington dc correct yes okay so First question,

have you ever talked to your parents like, why did you go, do you, what is your memory?

Like your parents saying, we're moving we're moving to the United States Did you come here before did you have family here?

How did it happen?

So actually my mom side of family been living in the US for over 50 years even before Iran Iran revolution

So my mom was kind of like My mom and one of her brother was like the only ones that were living in Iran at the time.

And she always feels like she's so alone and she wants to be close to her family.

And then so of course my grandmother applied for a green card for us, and then actually, the entire family got the green card.

Oh, that's great!

Yeah, so not only my mom, us, my dad.

So, you got it there in Iran, correct?

So, when you got that's amazing, yeah, okay, so that's how we came.

And so, it was a process, and you knew, and your, your, how did you feel when you were 17?

Uh, because obviously, a lot of teenagers, yeah, they have their friends, they go to school, and everything.

Were you excited about that?

My family and the way I raised, because I was kind of in that bubble you know I was growing up like watching MTV you know listening to like back street boys when I was a teenager listening to like you know all these like 80s and 90s music and like kind of growing up with the European American culture you know so you had access to the American language how was your English

Good actually you know not speaking because we don't speak English in group with our parents but like writing and reading because we do have to learn English in school in Iran.

Okay.

Yeah, like most countries.

Yes, Arabic and actually

English.

Oh, really?

Both, yeah.

Which is Arabic, it's so tough.

You know?

So,

yeah.

So, yeah.

And also, we had a private, like, my, my mom would hire a private tutor to teach us English, you know, me and my brothers since we were a kid.

But.

So, when she told you we're moving to the United States, were you excited?

I was excited because I'm 17 years old, you know, and I'm going to explore a new world I don't know anything about, you know.

So I was excited, but obviously, I had a good life at the time as a teenager.

I have tons of friends.

You know, I loved my home.

I loved my community.

You know, I loved my friend, and it was definitely hard and heartbroken, you know, when I left.

And I was crying for months and months when I even moved, missing my friends, missing my house, you know, your house, your room, you know, I can't imagine.

And coming to a culture, and we didn't, we understood, we can, we could write and understand if somebody talks us, but but you couldn't speak just basically and you got here and you, you, your mom put you in school,

so I

yes, soon as we got here, I literally had to go.

The problem I had was I didn't finish high schooling, Iran, so I had to go.

And you know how mean people can be in high school?

Yes.

The famous mean girls oh my god I experienced a gossiber whatever you guys want to call it yeah so that's what I was gonna ask you how was the culture shock was like holy shit they weren't welcoming and nice to you no no they were nasty

very nasty oh my god and I had to go to the hot I had to go to high school here my brother didn't have to go to high school he went straight to college and I went to one of the really most like one of the top famous school in Virginia because my family lives yeah we moved to DC and we live in Virginia and called Langley High School, which is right next to CIA.

By the way,

so and these like literally people in that school, it's like it's a dunno the top school, they were like driving Ferrari, 16, 17 years coming to the school, very bougie, very bougie.

And I was like, what?

What the fuck?

The fuck is happening?

And they all thought, like, I'm Persian, I'm very rich.

But my aunt, you know, they were very wealthy.

And at a time we were with them you know when we moved here so and I went to that school it was horrible I cannot tell you guys like all the guys were nice to me yeah because you're cute

I have to say so okay so let me ask you how was that like because I the at least that's the image I have and tell me if I'm wrong yeah in Iran people are a lot more conservative when it comes to flirting and dating yeah and here it's like you know this famous shit show that we talk about even like girls in high school yeah nowadays even worse when i was i mean i i didn't have like a normal high school life but whatever when when i was in high school yeah it was a little less but nowadays you know it's girls are yeah

right when they're 17 18 yeah was it kind of like a shock how much people flirted how the guys came on to you

i had had a boyfriend in run

my parents

So, but it was different.

It was different.

So you had to leave the boyfriend behind?

I was like more innocent.

I was not really having sex or anything.

It was just like co-walking in the street, holding hands,

kissing.

You know, it was just very innocent.

You know, it's not like, it wasn't like, I mean, I'm sure other girls in Iran were doing whatever they were doing, but I wasn't, you know.

So, but, you know, so I had a ton of boyfriends, you know, so no, that was not really a shocking thing, you know.

So, when you get here, the United States, fancy bougie school near the CIA, and the guys are all over you because you're like a little doll.

Yeah, you were like, okay, cool.

Yeah, they were, yeah.

So maybe that's why the girls didn't like you because, like, that bitch.

Yeah, I know, but I, no, there was two reasons they didn't like me.

Maybe that was one of the reasons.

I was not the most beautiful girl in the school for sure.

Not so.

I don't think that was one of the reasons.

But I think the second reason was like, I was so because the way you grew up in Iran and our culture, we respect teachers that, like, people are older than us.

That's how we raised a lot.

And here,

not so much, no offense again to anyone, no truth, you know,

and like, so then they're very rude to their teachers.

And I was like, We have to get up when the teacher comes to enter the room in school, in you know, into the room in Iran in school.

So, here I would get up, you know, in the beginning, and everybody was like looking at me who's just like, Why is she so weird?

And, like, and all the teacher, even like the principal of school, was in love with me.

Like, everyone loved me so much because you were so polite.

I was very polite, and I was like, you know, and I think they all hate me because of that one reason as well.

I remember I was at this class, and it was mostly girls, and none of the girls would talk to me

at the entire class.

So I had to-it happened to me, too, all the time.

I had some,

I, yeah, yeah, bad

experiences.

Bad experience.

We need to do like, oh, yeah, I've done episodes before about mean girls because it breaks my heart to this day when I see women being nasty to each other, being mean to each other, because I think life is hard enough.

We talk about it all the time.

And it has happened to me, same experience.

And I think it happens to millions of immigrants that come to this country.

Maybe because we have an accent or we don't look a certain way, or like you said, we have a habit that somebody else doesn't have or a religion or a hair color, whatever the hell it is that we do differently.

Instead of like

welcoming us, people like, you know, ostracize us.

And to me, believe it or not, it happened not only in high school, because I was in and out, in and out, in and out, right?

Because I was traveling with my parents, but when I went to college, when I finally went to college in the Bay Area, same thing, like I could tell a million stories how the girls treated me because I was Latin and I didn't look Latin and I had an accent.

I was always like the odd man out, and it's very hurtful.

Yes, it's very hurtful.

You know, I try to just remember the good times and not think about the bad times and in the past.

It made us strong women, right?

For sure, you know, and I think everyone went through this.

We're not the only ones.

People even worse.

You know, I think our institution was actually pretty good compared to a lot of other people, you know.

And, but, yeah, I mean.

So, okay, so you come to the United States, to Washington, D.C., start a new life with your parents.

Let's compare a little bit.

the cultures like for example the dating you iran in general you're raised much more conservative is that correct like you're raised like don't have sex before marriage yes you should you should marry a virgin yes correct correct my family is very modern because of they're very educated most of my my mom's side of family even some of my dad's side of family lives in this state or europe you know and they're very educated and so and we're very open we grew up very very open in iran me and my brother we had access to everything you know, but yeah, still like my mom would always say we didn't grow up with religion at all, at all.

So I don't practice any religion, you know, and

so, but my parents, my not so much my dad, my mom was always like, yeah, you need to like not have sex before marriage, you know, you have to be a virgin.

Did it change after she moved here?

Yeah, she continued saying,

like, yeah, and it just feels like, you know, and if it felt like if you would have if if I would have done something, I'd made a crime and I had that guilt, you know, because they make you feel like that, right?

You feel like that is it a crime?

If, like, the this, I forgot

to say what you call it.

This police has a name, right?

Like, the

force law, like, yeah, I forgot the name, but it's like kind of like the ethics police, whatever they call it.

Yeah, I mean,

yes,

some families, if they're very religious, you know, they are,

they would kill the girl.

Like, it happens.

They would say she would dishonor the family, dishonor the family, yeah.

But obviously, my family wasn't like that, you know.

And um, but yeah, I had a very hard time about that subject, and I had to struggle with it for many, many years, you know, not to be able to be openly talked to my mom, even though my mom is so like you saw my, like, you've seen, you know,

yeah, you know, but I

would hide it, you know, from her.

If you're dating someone, um, if someone's a certain age, like she didn't care, but like, no, like,

would not tell her if I lose, you know, if you lose your virginity,

yeah, if I lost my virginity, yeah, so I would be something like

super serious there, yes.

Well, not when even when we move to the U.S.,

I well, I don't have to talk about my virginity.

Well, you can if you want to,

but I think that's a very

conversation.

No, but I know what you mean, like, but I was the same, like, like i i i mean there's no problem like when people have sex in brazil or in france yeah it's a different but my mom was super conservative my mom come came from an Italian family and my grandma was super religious and my mom was always like and my you know my grandma used the ridiculous phrase like keep your legs crossed you know yeah and it's I never had that opening conversation with with my family it's funny it I get still judged not not judged but question this to these days you know people ask me like why why are you so conservative?

Why you don't drink?

Why are you not so open about sex?

And da-da-da, you know, because they don't understand what I have to go through.

It's ingrained in your culture.

Yeah, and then the trauma I had and the things I went through.

And it's different for me, you know?

Like, when you're not used to something, when you haven't done something, you haven't used that muscle, you haven't practiced something.

Like, it's very difficult for you.

It doesn't matter how many years you live in the country.

It doesn't matter.

Like, you know, and it's hard for me sometimes when people have to explain myself.

Uh-huh.

You know, no, I know.

Yeah.

It's not really.

I wish people would just love you and accept you, that who you are.

Ideally, yes, especially if somebody comes.

That's why I think it's so important to have these conversations in a country like the United States that is built by millions of immigrants.

And I agree.

I think people, when you meet somebody different, instead of judging them, ask questions, talk about it so you get to know them a little more.

And I am very grateful that you're here talking about all of that because I feel that I'm sure there are a lot of girls in Iran that if they need to go to the doctor, if they have an issue, if they need a gynecologist, if they're going to have sex with their boyfriend, anything, they must go through hell even to get medical help because they can't talk to their families about it.

Yes, I

yeah, I mean, I this is

yes, it's tough.

But I don't want to talk about my own private.

No, yeah, you don't have to,

but yes, but it's tough.

It's very true.

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You mentioned about drinking.

It's illegal to drink in Iran, correct?

In public, yes.

So do they sell booze there?

Underground, everything.

Oh, underground.

Yeah, yeah.

But illegally.

Illegally.

Oh, yeah.

They have like the bottom of the bottom.

But like you, you cannot.

You can't 49, you'll find everything.

But you cannot go to like a grocery store and say, I'm going to buy a bottle of wine.

You can order like a concert and then bring it to your home.

But what happens if this

etiquette has a social police, oh, you pay them off?

Yeah.

Could you get in the wrong hands, like the wrong side of the wall?

Yes.

I would not.

Like, if I was there, because you know, I don't like breaking laws.

I think this is

be so scared you know what we wanted to talk about is that I want to kind of tell about the feelings I had when you were asking me about the parties you know so I used to go to these underground parties and like dressed a certain way and you know dress just the way you go to the party here and then obviously you wear cover on top and then going to this you know to this parties and then the police inform inform

sorry

a little i can't talk anymore but but yeah so

the police will show up, and you know, you terrified because if they catch you and take you to jail, you know, you fucked, you don't know what's gonna happen.

So, I have all those memories, like having that fear.

I didn't experience it as much because, like, my parents were like not allowing me too much.

Like, I was 16, 17 to go to a lot of parties, you know, I was still young, but I would throw parties at home when my parents were not around at a very young age.

Oh my god, you little devil, yes,

so I have a devilish side, yes, 15, 16 with that innocent face, yeah.

14.

But I said it when I was 14, so you're not a hundred percent angel.

No, I'm definitely not.

And when I was like 14, 15, actually, I'd throw some parties at home with boys, and oh, right, you know, and like we just can't even do it anymore.

I think every teenager does that, like, who has, but then I got caught.

My parents find out, and that was the end of it, and yeah, so, but no, definitely, like,

um

i have all those fears you know so i think that's why you know me like i don't really care about really

doing anything much because like i i kind of like been through it experienced it you know i don't really do you know i don't drink i don't do drugs i don't right so that's what i was gonna so that you specifically don't drink you don't like alcohol uh i i'm a very light drinker i i like my wine but it's funny that the more i live I'm moving more and more towards not drinking at all.

Like, we're sitting here in this gorgeous place.

We were laughing, right?

Because it's, I'm like, we're drinking tea.

I didn't even bring a bottle of wine.

You come here with your husband and your brother.

Yes, totally.

I know.

This is such a romantic place, and it's so peaceful.

It's in the middle of the woods.

It's like this nature reserve in the middle of Topanga Canyon.

It's so gorgeous.

And we're laughing because we came here together because of Privé.

You wanted to come check out the property.

And I'm very grateful you invited me because I love a peaceful getaway.

But definitely, we both said next time we have a boyfriend, this is the most perfect romantic place.

10 minutes from Alibu that you should definitely come with somebody that you're into.

Honeymoon, boyfriend, weekend getaway because it should die for gorgeous and super romantic.

And we're sitting here working and drinking tea and eating healthy foods.

That's our lifestyle.

Doing the podcast.

But that's our lifestyle.

That's what we like to do.

Yeah.

But do you think a lot of it like you said the way you relate to people

uh the fact that you don't drink and the fact that you were more uncomfortable now you're better talking about certain subjects is because of your culture how you grew up

I think it's a combination of things.

I don't think it's only that, you know.

So I, yes, it might be the culture.

Again, if there's something, there's a lot of, if you don't know, you don't know.

If you don't haven't,

you know, it's just, think it's a combination of it, to be honest.

And I think, like, for me, I

my parents never forced me to do anything I didn't want to do, you know.

Of course, there were some rules, you know, like come home at a certain time, you know, do certain things.

But yeah, I think it's a combination of it.

Your friends that stayed behind.

So, how does it compare?

Like, let's say when they're older, in their 20s, their 30s,

there's a lot of pressure for them to marry young, right?

Yes.

Depending on your Okay, so the ones that that don't get married, can they like because I read something?

I don't know if it's true, can they like go out on a date and make out and kiss in public?

No, nothing in public.

You don't do anything.

You never show PDA, right?

Public displacement.

Maybe holding hands.

That's it.

Yeah, holding hands, but I mean, they can get in trouble by holding hands.

They can get in trouble holding hands?

Yes.

If they're not married, yes.

Wow.

That's crazy.

So, like, if you go to a situation.

They are.

They are holding hands.

They're doing a lot of things they're not supposed to do.

They're taking chances.

They're taking chances and they definitely fight back with the government.

Young Iranian generation, I'm so proud of them.

This whole movement happened just because of them.

And I wish like the older generation in Iran would come out and support this new generation and the revolution actually happened.

You know, it's very sad.

All these young, innocent people got killed and nothing happened.

You know, so I'm very proud of them.

They're very, very brave.

I don't know if I would be able to because it's not a joke, guys.

If you go in the street and you're going to either die or you're going to get arrested, there's

literally, I have, I had friends, is you know, was I was spoken to them, they were going out to protest, and they were telling me, Goodbye.

I might not ever talk to you again, come to you.

So, yeah, that's insanely brave.

That's like it's literally like going to war.

Yeah, you're risking your life.

And then, if you're in that point, you have nothing to lose.

Yeah,

it's definitely insanely brave.

And I think a lot of us thought

after, I don't want to mispronounce her name, Mazha.

Mazha Amini died, and everybody was talking about it for a while.

Her face was all over the media.

Killed.

Yeah.

Right.

She got killed.

I think we all had hope that she would be a symbol for change.

Yes, definitely.

And then I remember one day.

We went to a lot of protesting here.

Yeah, I remember you doing that.

We did everything we

whatever we could.

I mean, I'm sure there's more we could.

So let me ask you a question.

One day, a few months ago, we were talking about this, maybe because, yeah, you enter protests.

I'm not sure what it was.

And I remember you made a comment, and that comment stuck in my mind.

And ever since then, I've been wanting to do this episode.

You were like, yeah, but you know, the United States doesn't do anything to help.

The governments of other countries don't do anything to help.

Because it's not in their benefit.

But can you like elaborate?

Like, what do you think they should be doing more

to

as a voice?

How can they help?

What they said they don't want to get involved, but I mean, they put their nose

before the war, you know, they are involved all over the world, exactly.

So, I think it's kind of ridiculous.

I think they do do there.

Is like, I don't want to disclose too much, but like, there is, they do business with the Iranian government through the private companies in the U.S.

So it's just kind of double-sided, to be honest, and kind of like funny.

They're like talking shit about like Iran and they're terrorists they're this they're that and they're showing that image but at the same time they do business they have relationship and they don't do anything to change this government first of all you brought this government you you were one of the countries wanted to get rid of shah and brought this government and now we want change iranian people are literally asking the u.s and the friends like all these powerful company to help i mean sorry countries to help us and they didn't so you guys don't hear us and they don't help, and then at the same time, you guys call Middle Eastern people or Iranian people terrorists.

Like, that I'm still would absolutely never

fucked up politics, you know, and I would never understand it.

But why don't you help the Iranian people for the movement?

You know, oh no, we're not, we're, we don't want to get involved, you don't want to get involved because, like,

you guys are doing business, and it's not in your benefit, maybe this government to change.

I cannot find any other

explanation for this.

So, do you see um

no they're from iranian government

no we're not

nobody knows where we are

no yeah it's still a free country you can talk about whatever the hell you want she's looking at her phone like maybe i should

No, but I am very proud of you for speaking up and shedding light in this because after all the fucking protests, like, yeah, her face is still, you walk around Beverly Hills, her face is still there and the flag and and everything and then nothing gets done and then you see in the news that the Iranian government is like making the laws

I'm gonna say the laws against women because they are against women even more strict and these women are being oppressed more and more and more I agree with you I think the entire world

should have an obligation to help

It's heartbreaking

to see it.

I think it's unfair.

We get judged a lot.

People are not very educated.

And I'm not expecting people to be educated about every part of the

world and knowing about every country.

Why would they?

It's not in their interest.

Their interest is like, you know, people are very

on surface.

You know, it's all about celebrities and who is doing.

But not everybody.

Not everybody.

But the majority of the society that they call

it is very superficial, you know, and no one wants to get deep.

No one wants to talk about things.

Serious things.

Serious things.

And like, I totally agree with you.

And they make fun of you and you're not good enough or you're like different or and you know, and I don't care, you know, like, but it's good to know about other cultures to

educate yourself.

And it's just like, I know maybe it's not a hot subject anymore.

People were talking about it because the media was talking about it and it was a hot subject.

Maybe that's why you were getting like

more likes on your Instagram.

That's why you were talking, people were talking about it.

For me, like, I don't talk about it, but you know, as much anymore, but

it hurts me every single day, you know.

And I wish this is all I can.

I'm sure I can do more.

Yeah, but I agree with you.

Like I said, I'm not from Iran and it hurts me

because all the work I do is about women empowerment and us working together.

We talk all the time on this podcast that we are lucky that we have a vehicle that we put our voices all over the world.

Like this episode has listeners all the way in Australia and Europe and Brazil.

And we are lucky that we can talk about whatever the hell it is we want to talk about.

Even if it's sex, even if it's X-rated, even if it's dating relationships, other women.

If you don't want to listen, you don't.

But if you want to listen, we have the platform.

And this is why I keep saying it's so important to be able to say whatever you want to say and be supportive of other women, like you said.

I actually immigrants.

I want to add something to this, and it has nothing to do with being immigrants, just in general, supporting

other,

you know, women, females, entrepreneurs, just general women.

You know, I wanted to just add something, and I wanted to say, like,

it's so sad to see we don't support each other,

especially women in business, women in, you know, even with your own circle of friends, friends, you know, I'm not talking about strangers, I'm talking about friends.

It's so funny.

Your own friends, they don't support you, but they support some celebrities they've never met.

They never seen, they never seen, they don't care about all these big bands like Nike,

like, but they don't support their own friends.

They would judge them.

Oh, yeah, you're not good enough, you're not big enough.

Well, I don't need your help when I'm getting big enough or I do everything on my own you know you support your friends when they're when they need it

trying to build and and reflection of like honestly like you would never like outshine anyone with helping someone else everyone else is good at something

I would be happy to support other that that's one of my dreams so like when I get like

way more successful, I would love to start a foundation and like help other entrepreneurs, women

to be successful and they have their own business and I can I can give them support in any way I can and I would do that for any of my friends and it's so sad I want to bring this because that that bothers me actually we talk about it all the time because and that's how we became friends because we were like let's unite forces yeah let's kick some ass together we don't see each other as competition and I don't think women we'll talk about women because this is the subject today but I don't think women should see each other as competition even if they do the same thing if you join forces and you exchange information and you help your clients better, everybody's stronger together.

And I think that's the mentality that needs to change.

For some reason, all the social media and all this shit going on, like I said, the celebrity culture, discardable culture, dating apps made people so discardable that you look at each other in every way as competition.

We have issues with other girls.

They barely know us and they're like, oh, I don't like those bitches.

Like, why?

Judging.

Yeah,

I want to judge you.

I'm like,

can I add something else too as well?

This is such a good question.

It's also about like it.

I wanted to talk.

Maybe we should do an episode about this.

Like, it bothers me.

It's that also, besides that, also judging you and like not knowing who you are.

I mean, guys, I'm not talking about maybe people living in LA or the big cities, but there's a lot of people out there.

They don't live in the big city.

They don't have this access we have.

Please, please, please, everything you see on social media i'm not gonna maybe this is very cliche like it's not what you see even about celebrities even about rich people like it's like yes they some of them they stay are very successful they have their money but that necessary that doesn't mean they're very happy they're not they're really truly they're not who they are they're showing you also this like all these like fake influencers and like all over the place they're pretending to have a certain lifestyle just to have that image to be able to become a big and celebrate.

Look, listen, social media, and I say that all the time, as you know, is a marketing platform.

Absolutely.

You should use it to your advantage to sell your projects, whatever it is that you do.

It's not our personal life.

You shouldn't put your personal life there.

But people compare.

Young girls.

Oh, yeah, they're social.

And that breaks my heart.

It's the same.

Because they're like, oh my God, I need to be perfect.

I know.

I need to have this.

I need to have a lot of things.

And we talk about that all the time.

Young girls get very, very impressed with social media and comparing themselves.

And it's just

super sad.

Even me, like, you know, I post very luxury stuff because my brand is luxury.

Yeah.

But.

No, go ahead.

We're going to take a two-minute break and come back to wrap up with Maj.

The guys.

We'll be right back.

Okay, we're back.

The conversation is so good we went over time.

But yes, I agree.

Especially on girls, it's horrible the way they compare each other on social media,

peer pressure and everything.

And I think especially parents of girls

should be extra

respectful to how they treat women and their dates and their partners.

Yes.

So to give that self-confidence that young girls need.

Yeah, and then also, yes, it actually comes, everything is a source from your home, from your house, and what you teach your kids and what they see because, like, what they see, it's what they're gonna you know yeah register in their you know memories and and i was just saying that about my my my company you know my company is all about luxury lifestyle and you know selling that life and selling that experience but guys my life is not luxurious i work

get up at 6 7 a.m and by the time i finish she knows you know we do the same yeah same night we work until 10

like i'm making loads of money and like living this fantasy life.

You know, I'm grateful for everything,

but it's hard, it's difficult.

And I know, like, there's a ton of women actually, or other people, they do it much better than me, they work harder than me.

And, but it's not, please don't what you see, it's not no, yeah, social media is not real life, but

we are lucky, like finishing the episode of How We Started, we are so lucky that we live in a country that gives us these opportunities to work so hard, to be independent, marry or not marry,

dress as little or as much as we want, say whatever the fuck we want, kiss, not kiss, have sex, not have sex, do whatever we want.

And it's very, very, very, very sad, devastating that this day and age, not all countries offer this freedom to women.

And it's very sad that it's a situation in Iran.

But thank you for talking about it, shedding life on the subject, putting it out there.

If you guys listen to the episode and you like the topic, if you have a friend from Iran, especially all of us that live in Los Angeles, everybody has a friend from Iran.

talk to them you know ask them about it maybe there is something everybody can do i was literally looking on google and that's what they say you know just talking about it helps don't let the subject die you know keep pushing forward right yes like

absolutely and I want to add two things like

um and just finish this like um there's no I there's no judgment here like I I love everyone every culture every religion I respect so there's you know this is just my experience my personal opinion and what what it happens in the history not not necessarily actually my personal opinion you know And also, it's funny, this place is very special to me because

there's this place, I'm not gonna call it, I'm not gonna say what it is, but it's a membership place in LA, and I had to get a membership, and I had to actually write this story about myself.

And it was very, very difficult for me.

And the way I had to write this story, it was twisted.

And I can't share what it is because, you know, it's a private information, but what it was, I actually write this story about

myself and kind of like talk about my story about moving as a little like living in a different country coming here come moving to dc and coming to la it's a whole another animal you know and like being alone and like a little you know yeah ship and then there's all this like

anyway it's just like this whole story you know it just makes me like just think about like

at the end of the day, we're hot and nice and you know, we all have this inner child, you know, and

I wish we would talk about that more, bring that out more, and not be so toxic and like be so like against each other and comparing money, you know.

All of it is great, but just be more human.

I love that.

I think that's a beautiful message.

It is amazing.

I think that's my journey.

I think the more i live the more i want simple things real friendships amazing people hard-working people and a lot less material

gossip all this crap i think this is so so important

and you are amazing and ever since i've known you i have to say you really push forward getting out of your shell because i remember the first time i invited you to do the podcast you're like oh my god what if you asked me about sex you were super nervous but you did it anyway you braved through and then you did another one and you helped me interview other people and you brought guests.

So I feel it's like everything in life, right?

We got to get out of our comfort zone because the more you get out of your comfort zone, the more you grow and the more you spread your message.

And obviously you have a beautiful message to spread about your culture and your country.

And you're doing an incredible job.

Yeah, and I think it's because of you.

I mean, you obviously you have so many talents and you made me to come out of my comfort zone.

And it was because of you and if it wasn't because of your there's a lot of like positive things you added to my life

I do have and I think it's because of you I kind of like because like you know have more confidence and just like believing in

love and like push forward

you know so I think we feed off of each other it's a beautiful friendship I think you're the person that I ever met the only crazy bitch that works as much as I do we're literally like I never met anybody like that and I think that's why we have this incredible energy yeah and I hope your mom listens to this episode.

I hope your parents listen to this episode.

I hope to God this episode can arrive in Iran somehow

because we are sending so much energy, so much love to the women of Iran.

And like you said, other countries that don't have the freedom that we do.

Keep fighting, keep talking, don't give up because there is always a light at the end of the tunnel.

And you are doing your part.

You're doing an incredible job.

You're crazy inspiring.

Thank you.

Same.

Ladies, love each other.

Support each other.

Stop judging each other.

Stop being this nasty main girls, bitches.

Even with your own friends, even with your own circle, love each other, support each other.

Collaborate.

Like

nothing is going to happen.

Whatever it meant to be for you, it's always going to be for you.

Yeah.

No matter what.

If the God that's in your destiny, whatever you want to call it, universe will give it to you.

Absolutely.

Love each other.

Stop Stop hating.

On a final note, yeah, like because this is about dating, yeah,

bring your date here.

Yeah, yeah, bring your date here.

This place is gorgeous.

If you do want to know about it, please go to Privé P R

V.

I'm not even joining.

I'm joining P R I V E E L A dot com and on Instagram is Privet L A Luxury Concierge and Maj.

They can give you guys the information.

Go watch the video episode on Spotify because this place is magical it's gorgeous

definitely whenever i have a boyfriend i want to bring him here because it's in the middle of nature it's to die for beautiful you too it's definitely a honeymoonish place i am very grateful for this day here with you very grateful for being a friend for everything that you bring to the party and yes girls even about dating if some dude likes another girl don't hate the girl You know, look, there is no need for hate.

What's yours is going to find you.

Don't fight for man.

Don't fight for women.

What is yours?

It's yours.

And if somebody wants you, if they want you, they shouldn't.

You shouldn't want someone.

If a guy wants to go

and find somebody else and see greener pastures, let them go.

I literally had friends.

Well, they're not friends.

Like, they told me, we don't want you to come to the party.

Because the guy's going to like you.

Because the only guys like you.

And they didn't because they wanted to find a husband.

And they did.

And congratulations.

Yeah, good friends.

But it's like, yeah,

what's yours is yours.

And don't try to keep a dude.

And I keep saying that, don't force it because if the guy wants to wander around, date your friend, date whoever, they're not for you.

The guy that is for you, they're gonna want to be only with you, right?

So, yeah, join forces.

Thank you.

You're amazing.

You're amazing.

Sending 1 million billion trillion kisses and so much love to all the women of Iran here, beautifully represented by gorgeous Moshde.

Thank you.

In loving, loving, loving memory.

We're going to say her name before we go.

I love saying it.

I don't want to say it wrong.

Mahza.

Maza.

Mahza.

Mahza.

The brave.

Yeah.

She died to obviously leave a message for a better future for women.

Women are not property.

We're human beings.

Thank you.

You're incredible.

Love you.

Now we're going to drink some more tea and work some more and enjoy the place.

Love you guys.

See you soon.