November Bonus Episode: Twilight is Weird

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Speaker 1 When the full moon turns,

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Speaker 1 That's such a fucking banger. It is a banger.

Speaker 1 Should we just start the episode like that? I feel like we should.

Speaker 1 Hey, weirdos, I'm Ash. And I'm Elena.
And this is Twilight Morbid.

Speaker 1 Yeah, this is our bonus episode.

Speaker 1 Guys, we're gonna be talking about Twilight today. Oh my god, re-watching this.
Okay, first of all, the, I feel like this all started like around Halloween.

Speaker 1 I came over to record something late night, and I was like, yeah, thanks a lot for making me come over here late night because I was just watching Twilight and Elena stopped dead in her tracks and she goes, Why were you watching Twilight?

Speaker 1 And I was like, I just wanted to watch it. And she goes, no, earlier, I was watching Twilight for no fucking reason either.
For no reason. It just hit me.

Speaker 1 I was like, oh, I want to watch Twilight and just, I want to watch that camp classic again. Like, why on the same day did the book, like, it wasn't in a movie lineup.

Speaker 1 I was just like searching through movies. Or, you know what? I was probably searching for like Halloween movies and it was in there.
And I was like, a Halloween movie? Twilight? Yeah.

Speaker 1 But I was like, you know what? I'm going to fucking watch it. Let's put on some Twilight.
And then we were talking about it. and on the podcast.

Speaker 1 And you guys said, do we? You guys came through in a big way.

Speaker 1 Yes. A big way.

Speaker 1 I

Speaker 1 have, we've been knee-deep in Twilight. I'm really hoping that you guys dig this episode because I'm really hoping that

Speaker 1 you will allow us.

Speaker 1 to do the rest of the movies and the rest of the books because here's the thing it's it's gonna be fun even if you guys don't like this i'm just gonna pretend that you did and we're still going to do it.

Speaker 1 Damn it. I think you're going to be down.
I think you're going to love it. We've been knee-deep in it.
I mean, there's so many things to watch on TikTok about it, so many interviews with the cast.

Speaker 1 And then there's this book. I had followed this person on TikTok.
Her name's Sarah Elizabeth Gallagher. That book is...

Speaker 1 It's amazing. It's a gold mine.
The book is Why We Love and Hate Twilight, the highs and lows of the Twilight Saga.

Speaker 1 I had followed her on TikTok because she organically came up on my feed and was just talking about something. I think the first thing I saw was her talking about how, like,

Speaker 1 it's real weird that like Stephanie Meyer has like an illustrated guide to Twilight and wrote in that illustrated guide.

Speaker 1 It's not weird that she has a guide, but it's weird that she wrote that like, and we'll get into it, that all the pigment gets leashed.

Speaker 1 out of your skin when you become a vampire and was very clear on the fact that you are white no matter what ethnicity you are. Yeah, I would classify that as big fucking weird.

Speaker 1 And when that popped up on my feed, I said, I'm interested.

Speaker 1 And I immediately started following tell me everything sister right off the right off the bat she's a great follow she's very interesting she's really deep in it and this book why we love and hate twilight we'll link it in the show notes because it's a really fun it's a quick read it's a fun read she's a whole book she goes into and all the books the whole series all the movies like she has some really funny takes in here uh highly recommend it but

Speaker 1 also a gold mine for anything you really if you start wanting to just go down the rabbit hole, because let me tell you, we're not, I don't even think we got to go all the way down.

Speaker 1 We went so far, it's been like a few days that we've spent just in the twilight, the trenches, rabbit hole. And I could go for like eons.

Speaker 1 And if we get, we'll do the other movies and we'll go even deeper. But I can't wait.
If you're really interested, definitely check out cast interviews because,

Speaker 1 holy shit. Robert Pattinson, in particular.
I was just going to say,

Speaker 1 Robert Pattinson fucking hates these movies. These interviews are wild.
He hates the book. He literally was like, when I first read it, I felt like I was reading like Stephanie's diary.

Speaker 1 And I was like, this is really fucking weird. Yeah.
He was like, I shouldn't be reading this. I don't think anybody should read this.
It's wild. And so that's interesting.

Speaker 1 And then Stephanie Myers has had and maintained a website throughout the process, even before the books were published, where

Speaker 1 it's a treasure trove of interesting things. I mean, it's updates.
Yeah, it's all archived. There's like fan casting that she wanted for the movie, for the movies, which is very interesting.

Speaker 1 It's still up there.

Speaker 1 She wanted Henry Cavill to play Edward really bad. Not for me.

Speaker 1 She wanted that so bad. I said he was just born 40.

Speaker 1 He can't play a 17-year-old, even in 2008. I feel like the picture of him as 17, he looks younger.
He just isn't what I pictured. He's not what I picture at all.

Speaker 1 But also, we were just like. Transparently.
It's embedded in our heads that it's Robert Pattinson. Well, and not even even because transparently for me,

Speaker 1 I love Robert Pattinson. I think he's wildly handsome, and I really like him.
I remember watching the movie, and when he first came on, I was like disappointed. That's not what I pictured.

Speaker 1 And I wasn't disappointed because he's ugly or something or like unattractive. Yeah.
He just wasn't what I pictured in my head. Yeah.
And so I was like,

Speaker 1 I was like, damn, that sucks. Like, that's not what I thought.
He became more Edward to me as it went on. Yeah.
But like, I remember being being like pretty, and actually, John, shout out to John.

Speaker 1 He went to the first Twilight movie with me because he's a real one. Yeah.
And I remember just looking at him and being like, that's not who I thought Edward was. And he was like, what?

Speaker 1 He's like, I'm sorry.

Speaker 1 Why? What's that about? I feel like we must have had such a different experience reading these for the first time because you read these at 22, which must have been like quite the adventure.

Speaker 1 I know the books came out in 2005, 2005. So I was just out of high school.
Well, I think I read them like when the movie started to come out because I read them ahead of time. Okay.

Speaker 1 It started to be like a craze. I read them when I was like 12.
So even just like the age that you were when you read them, I mean, like, it must have been so different for us. Yes.

Speaker 1 Because I was like 18 or something. I was.
Or like 19. I think I was like prime fucking age for these books because I thought they were just next level.
Next level.

Speaker 1 And I mean, like, props to her, these books, they hooked everybody. Yeah.

Speaker 1 So that like, I'm not, I'm not out here saying, like, these are, they're, I want to reread them because I think it'll be a very interesting, total reread. I know.
I wish I still had mine.

Speaker 1 I still have mine. Do you really? Yeah, they're floating around.
So, like, I'm definitely going to be rereading them.

Speaker 1 And, like, props to her for she told a story that everybody that, and that's what you, that's what everybody wants to do who wants to like be an author or be a storyteller.

Speaker 1 You want to tell a good story. And she did.
She told one. Told a good ass story.

Speaker 1 Where I think she might have dipped into some issues is where she went a little too far into explaining yeah the lore and the backstories sometimes i think you just you know you don't need it sometimes it sometimes i don't need it it's like when you over egg a pudding that's the thing sometimes it's like i think just letting the the readers and the fans come up with their own head canons and kind of take things from little bits and pieces you give them is the best way to do it because then it becomes their story and it's like they can kind of be but when you're giving them too much you're putting a little too much of your own personal likes and dislikes into the story.

Speaker 1 And that can get hairy as it does here.

Speaker 1 I mean, we just told you that it's the hairiest it could possibly get. It gets pretty hairy.
Yeah. So this is the movie came out in 2008, the first movie.
Like I said,

Speaker 1 the first book was published in 2005. According to her website, I'm pretty sure she like wrote, like,

Speaker 1 first of all, she had a dream. That's where this all came from.
The dream is very interesting to me.

Speaker 1 I'm not like sitting here questioning her reality, but she said what happened was she had a dream and this dream was she was watching two people in a meadow.

Speaker 1 Like she just, the dream was two people that weren't her in this meadow.

Speaker 1 And they were talking, you know, they were an impossibly beautiful boy and a very average looking girl, which like, damn, which I was like, okay.

Speaker 1 And sure.

Speaker 1 And they were talking about how in love they were, but how it was going to be hard because he was a vampire and all this shit. And she just was like, I got to know what's up with these two.

Speaker 1 that's interesting and i'm not i'm not here to maybe other people dream this way i never dream where i'm watching a movie in my dream or like watching part of the dream i'm not like watching two people have a conversation ever and like i'm always part of i'm i'm in the mix in my dreams like i'm always

Speaker 1 part of what's going on like even uh like because the butcher and the wren my first book i i had a dream when i was pregnant and I was being chased in the dream yeah by somebody

Speaker 1 like I was being chased and I was like who the fuck is that guy right I was actively in the dream I and again that's just how I dream I don't know if other people dream and I would be curious to hear you guys do you guys ever dream where you're watching other people exist and you're just no part of the dream yeah Because if you, I'm very interested in it.

Speaker 1 I'm sure people probably do because dreams are so fucking weird. Even people that's like that right in their stories to us about their dreams in general.
They're always fucking crazy. They're crazy.

Speaker 1 But I always, I'm always involved in mine, but maybe it's different. But this is, that's how this started.
She wanted to know these two people. She wanted to like flesh out this story, which is cool.

Speaker 1 Very cool. Especially when you get a part of the story in the dream and you're like, well, now I want to know more.
Like, why can't you be together? What's that about?

Speaker 1 So she, I think she said that she did all of this, dreamt it, wrote it, edited it, published it in like six months. That which is crazy.
Beyond my wildest imagination.

Speaker 1 Because it's a pretty solid length. It's a thick ass book.
And it's how many pages is it? How many pages? Holy shit.

Speaker 1 It varies by edition, but the original hardcover had 544 pages and the paperback

Speaker 1 had 498. Yeah.
That's all. That's big.
Big old book. That's a big, beefy book.
So it's like, that's really, that's wild.

Speaker 1 I just remember walking around like sixth and seventh grade, and everyone in the hallway had one fucking part of that series in their hands. I was always reading that shit.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I remember, I vividly remember tearing through these books. Yeah.
Which is funny because I've been trying to get back and I've been on like such a horror and thriller kick, which I love.

Speaker 1 I will stay horror thriller forever. Are you about to say something that I was thinking about the other day? I'm interested.

Speaker 1 I was so involved in these books that I'm like, I should give some of these kind of books a chance more. Like,

Speaker 1 you know, fantasy kind of thing. Yeah, like more fantasy stuff because I love that stuff.
It's so funny.

Speaker 1 I started a thriller the other day and it's not bad by any means, but I was just like, I can't get into this.

Speaker 1 And it's not the book because it's been like a couple times lately that I've picked up some thrillers and I'm like, I think I need a genre switch. Yeah, sometimes you get trapped in a genre for sure.

Speaker 1 Like I love, I'll never get sick of horror. No.
Like I will say, I can read a horror book every day for the rest of my life and I'll be happy. But in like thriller, I love to.

Speaker 1 And like, I love those, but I do think. Sometimes you need to like switch it around.
Well, this, going back to this made me remember how

Speaker 1 obsessed I was with this series and wanting to know what happened next and like being very involved in it. And the rules of like Normandy World.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and just liking the lore and liking like this whole like fantasy world that was going on.

Speaker 1 And then even when you get into like, and hopefully we can get into it next time more, but like when you get into New Moon and you start to learn like Jacob's tribe, like all those things.

Speaker 1 Yeah, when that starts being brought in, which also is like...

Speaker 1 a wild thing that she kind of like found this quillute tribe and it's like a little bit of like taking their legends and turning it into what she wanted to

Speaker 1 But, you know, here we are.

Speaker 1 But there's a lot. There's a lot to this.
One of the things that she, like, Stephanie Meyer, like, readily admits is that she was like fully in love with Edward. Like, fully in love with her.

Speaker 1 She also picked up on that. Character.
Yeah. We got to link some of the interviews.
We do because he did an interview with E.

Speaker 1 The interviewer looked like he wanted his chair to swallow him. Oh, he, because it was for the Twilight film.
Like, Twilight is right voting him. It's like a press junket.

Speaker 1 And he's out.

Speaker 1 And Robert Pattinson is like, Yeah, it felt when I read the book, I was kind of like, I feel like I'm reading Stephanie's journal.

Speaker 1 And she like, and he literally says, like, sexual fantasies about this, this Edward character. This fictional character.
And he's like, and he's like, and I thought this woman's mad.

Speaker 1 Like, she's in love with her fictional character. And I was like, oh my God.
Yeah, he really, he called them out 2020, if you remember. It was, and this, he's, he's Edward.
Like, he's Edward.

Speaker 1 Long Long term, babe. Like, that is no switch around.
It's wild. It's wild.
And he says, he was like, this just felt like, and he even says it felt like she is Bella and she saw herself as Bella.

Speaker 1 Well, and I think she has kind of admitted to that. Like she, that, like, pieces of her are Bella.
Which, like, makes that, you, you wrote a fit insert is a very normal thing for an author to do.

Speaker 1 It's just you, you do that naturally sometimes.

Speaker 1 I was going to say, you probably do it without even thinking because I know like even when you wrote Butcher and the Ren, you didn't set out to make yourself ren. But like, no, you're pretty much Ren.

Speaker 1 But like pieces of me are there. And I always say like pieces of what I aspire to be are Ren.
Yeah, that makes sense.

Speaker 1 But like with Bella, I think she said like that it's not her. But Bella's physical description is literally her.

Speaker 1 And then I think that we read something on her own website, actually, that said, um, because one of the frequently asked questions is, why is everybody so obsessed with Bella?

Speaker 1 Which is a very valid question. Because it's like the way she describes her, like she's a very average looking girl.

Speaker 1 Like she's pretty, but, you know, not like remarkable in any big way and every she moves to forks and men are falling at her feet literally every single man

Speaker 1 and boy in that place is falling over themselves for her it's crazy a boy crashes his car for her like literally crashes his car not really for her almost at her

Speaker 1 still he's

Speaker 1 He losing it. He is like, and they all are.

Speaker 1 But she said that that was basically modeled after an experience that she had in her her life where I think she said she went to high school in Scottsdale, Arizona. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And then I think it was Utah that she moved to for college. Like, I think she said, I think it's Utah.
And

Speaker 1 in college, she had this experience where like all these boys became obsessed with her and like it was a great experience. And she was saying, like, I think it's like relative to where you're at.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Like, you know, who falls at your feet.
Yeah. Like, she was like, oh, I just became like a 10.
She said, she was humble. She said, she became an eight.

Speaker 1 she became an eight excuse me i said stephanie i was like damn be a 10 girl be a 10 be the 10 that you feel you are yeah she's a time she's a demon it was it was a wild it was a very like shocking answer to the question because it's just like why is every boy falling all over themselves for bella and she's like because they do it for me then it's like whoa all right damn girl here we are again

Speaker 1 damn go to the website please please go to the website um we're just gonna go through and kind of talk about all the things that we noticed while watching it. Talk about a little bit about the books.

Speaker 1 One of the first things I thought of, and I remembered it when I saw it somewhere, when I was like looking around, I was like, oh my God, I forgot about this. Was that in the book?

Speaker 1 It doesn't happen in the movie, but in the book, Bella straight up passes out during their first kiss. Yeah, I also forgot that.
She just KOs during their first kiss.

Speaker 1 Peace out. She said that was so sick.
Bye. Bye.

Speaker 1 Can you imagine how fucking embarrassing that would be? Well, and also it's interesting because as like Sarah Elizabeth Gallagher points out in her book and on like tick tock and stuff

Speaker 1 in the illustrated guide which you can get on Amazon

Speaker 1 it's like Stephanie Meyer's like official illustrated guide it's her look at this whole thing in the illustrated guide it says that

Speaker 1 like there's this whole section that says like what are the what are the vampires like bodily fluids essentially she says venom right venom based fluids. Facts.

Speaker 1 She doesn't go deeply into what these venom-based fluids are, but they are every fluid in the vampire's body. In their stomach, in their mouth, their saliva is venom-based.

Speaker 1 Their eyes are lubricated with venom-based fluid, but they don't cry tears. What? They cry tears.
But it's just to allow their eyes to like move around. Okay.

Speaker 1 And then like between their cells is venom-based fluids. It's everything.
Just venom everywhere. Not even blood.
When they drink blood, they just absorb it into their body. Everything else is venom.

Speaker 1 Okay. So their saliva is venom.
So they also don't have fangs, like chill, like regular fangs. Their teeth are just sharp.
Like the edges are just really sharp. Wait, why don't I remember that?

Speaker 1 They don't have fangs. They don't have fangs.
I did see one, like a few people say, like, when we were looking at TikToks, that she didn't write vampire. She wrote Fae.
Honestly, valid.

Speaker 1 Because these aren't like traditional. Because she created her own like monster.
Yeah. Quote unquote.
Right. Because their teeth are indestructible and just really sharp.
What I would fucking give.

Speaker 1 I know what all of us

Speaker 1 give for indestructible

Speaker 1 teeth. But the thing is, when

Speaker 1 Bella and Edward kiss for the first time, and when they kiss in the future after that, it has to be closed mouths. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Because if she opens her mouth, saliva comes in, that's venom-based. That would turn her into a vampire.
Right. Because that's how, like, you give the venom, like, they have to, like, take it.

Speaker 1 So when she passes out after that first kiss it's from a tight-lipped closed mouth kiss so is she just really fucking excited

Speaker 1 i girlfriend was she just super white

Speaker 1 before it's just wild yeah that because you really have to think about that they're just furiously mashing their mouths together that's deeply upsetting It's like a seventh grade.

Speaker 1 Like, that is something to really think about. It's actually not something to, like, super, super think about.
I want you to think about it so harsh. I don't, I don't subscribe to that.
Another

Speaker 1 thing off of that is that they're supposedly like made, like they're like stone. Yeah.
Like porcelain. Yeah.
Yeah. I know where you're going.
You know where I'm going. I got to hide for this one.

Speaker 1 I'm going to my sweatshirt. Edward does all the things.
If you will. He has so many hobbies.
He has so many hobbies. Like he can play the piano.
He knows languages. He can paint, he can read.

Speaker 1 He can all of this shit.

Speaker 1 like he just does he's really good boy and the way he got so good at that no because at one point and it's later it's in one of the later books and one of the later movies after they fuck uh after they fuck after they so it's got to be breaking down then yeah when they break the bed bella exactly bella is like hey how are we ever gonna stop though like and then she was like you know your family seems so normal like how do they do it i think aren't they having that conversation like while they're still fucking technically while they're still connected yeah yeah

Speaker 1 and that's how sarah put it he basically is like

Speaker 1 they you haven't seen them at night and he's like why do you think i'm so good at so many things yeah and when you really like sarah pointed this out she was like just to be clear that means that they're just fucking all the time

Speaker 1 and remember they're made of like stone porcelain

Speaker 1 so she literally

Speaker 1 porcelain bowls and just like

Speaker 1 so upset and then points out that remember he can read everyone's thoughts.

Speaker 1 So he can hear what they're thinking.

Speaker 1 Why wouldn't you just leave? I would, like, go fly about the trees. Go fly about.
Because one thing about Edward is he is the tree bias. Truly.

Speaker 1 He is sitting in trees. He is one with the trees.
He is trees. Fly about the trees.
Get out of there, my child.

Speaker 1 Don't learn them. I mean, it's cool that you learned skills while everybody was fucking, but like, go to the library and learn them.
Just do something else. Oh.
Like, what the fuck? Get out of there.

Speaker 1 And it's it's like your weird siblings, but they're like not your siblings. No, okay.
Can we talk about that a little bit? Because it's fucking weird. And that's pretty much like

Speaker 1 the very beginning of the movie. Like Jessica is explaining to,

Speaker 1 I almost just said Kristen Stewart, Bella, that Dr. Carlisle like adopted all of these kids and then they all paired up.
I'm like, yeah.

Speaker 1 If someone told me in high school that all these foster brother and sisters just fucked each other in their foster dad's house i'd be like i feel like somebody should get called about somebody should call someone like that's they're all just coupled up he's running a brothel essentially he essentially is hello and what's crazier is he like when you go into that illustrated guide yeah there's so i'm begging you i need to go into it i will go into it because she she describes that like um

Speaker 1 First of all, Esme

Speaker 1 met Carlisle, Esme the mom, quote unquote, met Carlisle Carlisle when she was a child. Oh.
And was like really sick or something. And he was the doctor that was called to take care of her.

Speaker 1 And she became infatuated with him. And so later, when he comes and like turns her, they get together romantically.
That's fucked. Fucked up.
He knew her as a child. Yeah, that's fucked up.

Speaker 1 And she was obsessed with him as a child. Remember, this is not me making this up.
This is in Stephanie Meyer's illustrated guide in which she willingly handed us the the backstories of these.

Speaker 1 That is beyond fizzity, fizzity fucked. So there's that.
There's always that. There's that.
What the hell? And then there is

Speaker 1 Rosalie. Oh, so there's Edward.
So he changed Edward. Edward was like 17.
Okay, wait. Can I interrupt you there?

Speaker 1 Big fucking problem already with that because they say, I don't remember if they say it in the books. They probably do.

Speaker 1 But they say in the movie that Jasper is like the youngest member of the family and that's why he's so bloodthirsty.

Speaker 1 That's just simply incorrect because for everybody who forgot, Jasper is a fucking Confederate soldier. Oh, we're going to get into that.
Don't worry.

Speaker 1 And Edward got turned during the Spanish influenza, which was after the Confederate

Speaker 1 war. So that is explained a little bit.
Is it?

Speaker 1 She's not the youngest. He's the most.

Speaker 1 He's having trouble still with the whole vegetarian thing. He has been a vegetarian.
vegetarian technique. Yeah, like a vampire vegetarian.
Like they only have

Speaker 1 animal blood. He's been doing that with this family for 50 plus years by the time we see him.
Yeah. And he still just like is having trouble dealing with it because his whole backstory, which

Speaker 1 let's get, you know what? Fucked up. Before I get to Jasper's backstory, let me get to Edward.

Speaker 1 Sorry, I interrupted you. Edward is turned.

Speaker 1 And he's, you know, kind of Carlisle sees himself in Edward, essentially. Yeah.
Carlisle's only supposed to be 23, by the way. He's 23 when he was turned.
That's not true. 23.
Shut up.

Speaker 1 So he kind of sees this, like Edward. He sees like he kind of, they bond really like a lot.
Also, I'm sorry.

Speaker 1 This fucking 23-year-old foster dad with a bunch of 17-year-old kids fucking pared off and fucking get his house. What's going on?

Speaker 1 Like so many authorities would there would be an FBI raid at this foster woman. Like, but go, continue, please.

Speaker 1 He wants to find him, like, a partner because he's like, I want you to have someone you love. Because I guess the whole idea is that.

Speaker 1 Do they like mate for eternity? They mate. Like they have a mate.

Speaker 1 And also, if you're like a vegetarian vampire, essentially, you are more likely to form bonds because you are not like tainted by killing someone. That's kind of funny.
Because there's more humanity.

Speaker 1 What's also like touched upon in the last episode of True Blood that we covered. Yeah.
Which we'll get to.

Speaker 1 That's just one of like vampire lore and so he wants him to find somebody so he turns rosalie initially for edward because he's like oh she's for edward but they end up not

Speaker 1 like digging each other they just like each other as like brother and sister oh my god you're like unlocking my memories I hyper fixated on this, so we're

Speaker 1 just gonna change it. I love your hyperfixations.
And he changed, like, Rosalie's story is that whole, like, you know, she was the prettiest girl in all of New York City or Rosalie.

Speaker 1 Rosalie's backstory fucking wins. It's pretty great.
It's the best. It's horrifying.
Like what? Because her vengeance. She gets like paired off with like this wealthy banker's son.
Is it Royce? Royce.

Speaker 1 And he and his friends one night when she's coming home from her friend's house literally assault and rape her and leave her for dead on the street. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And so she comes back and is like, so Carlos saves her. And then she comes back and literally kills them all, like tortures them all, and then shows up with Royce wearing a wedding dress.
Last.

Speaker 1 And it's in the movie, which we don't see it in the first movie, so I won't go too far into it because I'm trying to stay with you. I think it's an eclipse.

Speaker 1 It's iconic. Yeah, we'll get to that.
But so there's that. And then there's Alice and Jasper.
Alice was in like an institution because she had seen visions already and they thought she was crazy. Yup.

Speaker 1 So she ends up becoming a vampire because one of the people in the institution changed her. And then Jasper.

Speaker 1 Let's get into Jasper. Honey.
So, also, Rosalie's name was originally going to be Carol.

Speaker 1 Listen, there's nothing wrong with the name Carol. Like, that's a beautiful name, but Carol? Carol Cullen.
I'm Carol. I'm Carol Cullen.
And then Jasper was originally Ronald.

Speaker 1 I don't even hate that. Ronald's and Alice is kind of cute.
But he's Jasper now. And

Speaker 1 I'm not past Carol yet.

Speaker 1 You didn't give me enough time with that.

Speaker 1 Rosalie's name was going to just be Carol's. Okay.

Speaker 1 They're both beautiful names.

Speaker 1 Very different names. Vastly different.
Carol. Like, imagine.

Speaker 1 I don't get it. I don't know why that's so fucking funny.

Speaker 1 But let's get into fucking Jasper for a moment.

Speaker 1 Everybody's waiting with bated breath. Everybody take him on the fucking seat.

Speaker 1 He went to the edge of their seat. Jasper's defining quality is that he's a very proud Confederate soldier.

Speaker 1 Like, and that's not funny. No, it's just that she did this with her whole chest.
And is it one of the things, too, that you, I don't, where did you read it? I have so much. Okay, go.
Go.

Speaker 1 Yes. Go, girl.
Go back exactly what you're talking about. But they can't change.
So for Jack, so she is, Stephanie Myers, Meyer is very open about the fact that she does not like research.

Speaker 1 That becomes abundantly clear. Because also, Carlisle's backstory is that he was just chilling around in the sewers of London in 16 something.
Yeah. Sewers were not invented or created in London.

Speaker 1 So, like, there wasn't even, which, like, mistakes can be made. Okay.

Speaker 1 That's the thing. I'm like, that's a pretty big one.
That's hundreds of years. Only egregious, like, okay, shit happens.
Like, you missed one thing. People would let it go.

Speaker 1 That's fine, but there's a lot of things. But she's very open.
She says, I don't like research.

Speaker 1 I don't like to do a lot of research for it because she's creating a fantasy world and this is her world and she's going to make it, which, like, more power to you. Yeah.

Speaker 1 But she, and she says, and this is a quote. The only time I really did any research on vampires was when the character Bella did research on vampires because I was creating my own world.

Speaker 1 I didn't want to find out just how many rules I was breaking. Get that.
Totally get that. Yeah.
But one thing she did do research for is Jasper's name.

Speaker 1 And for Jasper's name, when she was like, Ronald isn't working for me, she said she searched roll calls for the Confederate Army in Texas

Speaker 1 and found Jasper.

Speaker 1 So that's the one she rooted in reality was. was that Confederate soldier's name,

Speaker 1 which is not great. And before everybody comes to us and like gets really angry at us and says, you know, like, not all Confederate soldiers were racist.
Oh, I have an answer for you for Philip.

Speaker 1 Don't worry. Go ahead, Grandpa.
Because, yeah, totally. Absolutely.
Sure. We're not living that.

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 1 Jasper

Speaker 1 really fucking wanted to be a Confederate soldier. Jasper sought this experience.
Here's what he did. He very much sought this experience.
Jasper worked with a travel advisor for the Confederate war.

Speaker 1 So you're talking about the people that are fighting for the Confederacy that were forced into it. Yes.
Like forced into it at a young age, like didn't want to be part of it.

Speaker 1 Like just happened to live there and had to fight for that side.

Speaker 1 Which like what the fuck uh but jasper literally lied about his age to become a fed confederate soldier and said he was so fucking excited about it

Speaker 1 he talks about he is the youngest captain in the texas cavalry all the time he was rising the rank like he was confederate soldiering to the highest order.

Speaker 1 And like, I think in Eclipse, he really starts because they have to like fight the army and we'll get there when we cover it. But he's

Speaker 1 so into it. And he like heads part of the training.
And he's like, you have a Confederate soldier training you. Yep.
That's an issue. And what makes, here's more added on to it.
So there's that.

Speaker 1 He talks about it all the time. Like he, that's his thing.
He's very, not in the first movie. You don't hear about it in the first movie.
Like, it's, it comes later.

Speaker 1 But just to know his character going forward.

Speaker 1 Again, he's been drinking animal blood for like 50 plus years, but he's still feral as fuck. And it's because he was like a fucking monster when he was a brave, and he like killed a lot of people.

Speaker 1 And then when he got turned into a vampire,

Speaker 1 whoever turned him, I think it's like somebody Maria, maybe, turned him. Oh, yeah.
She used him to like hunt newborn vampires.

Speaker 1 And after they couldn't use them anymore, he had to kill them. So he was just killing.

Speaker 1 Like killing, killing, killing, killing, killing for like almost the entire time he was alive. Essentially, he's a psychopath.

Speaker 1 So 50 plus years of drinking animal blood, he's still not, it hasn't busted out that killer instinct of him, which makes sense. But

Speaker 1 she did this thing where she gives some of the vampires special abilities. Only some of them.

Speaker 1 So some of them don't have them. Alice, she had a special ability when she was a human.
She was like kind of psychic. She could see things happen.
So it like translated. Edward, he can read minds.

Speaker 1 But like Rosalie doesn't have one. Like a few of the other ones don't have one.
Yeah. Jasper has one.
And it's that he is wildly empathetic.

Speaker 1 He can literally feel what other people are feeling.

Speaker 1 And not once does she have him say, and you know what? I think I was on the wrong side.

Speaker 1 Not once. He can literally feel what someone else is feeling.

Speaker 1 And he still has not come to the conclusion that maybe it wasn't that sick that he was a Confederate soldier. Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's just crazy. They're really just like low-key trying to conform him to like good vampire side, but he was born to be bad vampire.
A terrible murderer vampire.

Speaker 1 And it's just weird to like, because like you gotta have him fight for the union. It's the same time period.
Like if you really wanted to do that. Or you didn't even have to involve that.

Speaker 1 He didn't have to be a soldier. Yeah.
And also it's like, or have, if you want to make him a redeemable character, then have him come say with, verbalize,

Speaker 1 I.

Speaker 1 Because also in the illustrated guide, again, go look at it.

Speaker 1 In the illustrated guide, she says that he has like because they all have like a million degrees because they've been around for like a hundred years yeah he has degrees in philosophy and history

Speaker 1 and not once has he said out loud i think i up imagine having on the wrong side imagine having to take a course learning about that time period and still knowing that you were on the wrong side but he doesn't yeah that's the thing it's like and you didn't why didn't you make him a redeemable character of him being like wow i was educated and i learned that like i have a lot of making up to do because i was on the wrong side of history.

Speaker 1 Wouldn't that like kind of poke a hole in her own lore though? Because you were saying when we were talking about it the other day that part of it is that they don't change.

Speaker 1 That's it, see, and that's, that's where her lore kind of like fucks itself. That's where, why revealing too much of the lore kind of backed her into a corner a few times.

Speaker 1 Because it's like the whole thing is they get frozen when they get turned.

Speaker 1 Frozen in their likes and their dislikes, all that.

Speaker 1 But they can still be educated. Yeah.
And you can still, i think like form a different opinion from being educated but frozen in their likes and dislikes when that's the problem

Speaker 1 hits here and it really fucked this whole thing because it's like he can't be educated yeah technically he should be able to be educated yeah it's you know it just doesn't make a lot of sense a lot of sense um but yeah it's really jasper is

Speaker 1 is a real fucking

Speaker 1 a real fucking problem he really is and then like alice is just like took you to like took you long enough for me to like, I've been waiting for you.

Speaker 1 And it's like, you were just waiting around for your Confederate soldier, Alice? Yeah. You're supposed to be our pixie girl.
It doesn't really

Speaker 1 drive. There's a lot.
The Illustrated Guide will really open eyes to a lot of things. I'm so excited to get it.

Speaker 1 And that's where we come into the whole like pigment being leeched out of your skin when you turn into a vampire.

Speaker 1 Because that's in the Illustrated Guide. It's part of the whole like, it's under like palor, I think is the section, like the pallor.
Why would you need that to be a thing? Yeah, that's the thing.

Speaker 1 And it says, despite your ethnicity, you will become white. That's really, really,

Speaker 1 really bad. And it's like, that's part of the whole thing, too, is become you, you become the most beautiful creature.

Speaker 1 I'm going to go ahead and need you to leave that silence in. Leave it in.

Speaker 1 Also, freckles, tattoos, beauty marks, they all disappear i would be so fucking which as soon as i saw freckles disappear i was like oh is it not beautiful freckles disappear rude and also all my fucking tattoos did do you know how much money i've spent i would be curating this i would be so like i would go out and get them again well also i'm like come on vampires have to have tattoos are you kidding me as hell like let's go and vampires do have tattoos because james has one yeah on the same

Speaker 1 so lore ruin lore because i think they i think they spent so much of their CGI budget on Edward flying. Absolutely.

Speaker 1 And like, I think that's actual fact that they couldn't then remove the tattoo because it was like going to take too much.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

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Speaker 1 Well, you might be sitting here saying, Well, in the movies, Laurent. Yeah.
Not the best. He's fucking vampires.
Played by Eddie Gathege.

Speaker 1 And he's fucking phenomenal in that coin. And he is

Speaker 1 stunning.

Speaker 1 I mean, stunning.

Speaker 1 Like, truly, that man, when he shows up on the scene, you just go,

Speaker 1 like, he's one of those. So, like, you said

Speaker 1 that's a French Jass name. I said, that's a Fred Jass name right there.
And that's the thing. So, missed opportunity, first of all, because it's like, look at that man.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you could have done that many times. You could have had a few people.
You would have had vampire diversity. Yeah.
It would have been.

Speaker 1 And Catherine Hardwick, the director, actually wanted a lot more diversity in the cast, but got pushback from Stephanie Meyer because she said, I created this world. This is how I see my vampires.

Speaker 1 This is how I've created the lore. This is how I whitewashed them.

Speaker 1 And finally agreed that Laurent could be darker skinned, but only because he's described, because she also says that if you have like olive skin, then it will, you'll still go white, but you'll be maybe a little darker.

Speaker 1 I think we just didn't really need to touch on that. And so I think Laurent is described as having like a little more olive skin.
So she agreed to let him be a black man. And of course, yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's a, there's too many implications with that. It's a lot.
There's too many implications. But all I have to say is that Eddie Gathege is one of the best parts of that movie.
Yup.

Speaker 1 I think he's phenomenal. Yup.
And I think he is gorgeous. And the second movie, too, he's like a huge part of that.
He's beautiful. Yeah.
And he's so good. He's so likable.

Speaker 1 I just think missed opportunities abound there.

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 1 yeah, so that's all in the illustrated guide. But like just going back to like the actual movie, because we sat down and watched it and went through.

Speaker 1 Yeah, should we go through like all of our thoughts? We'll just go through our thoughts.

Speaker 1 Oh, the book was originally named Forks.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's hilarious. I understand that Forks, like Forks Washington, but like,

Speaker 1 hold on, I said Washington so dumb. Forks, Washington.
Oh, Forks, Washington.

Speaker 1 But to name it Forks would have been diabolical.

Speaker 1 What's the sequel, Staff? Spoon? Spoon. Sporks? Just one third.

Speaker 1 Once they get Renesme, it's Sporks because it's like a combo of the two. Yikes.

Speaker 1 Ew.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's a wild one. One thing about the movie that was a real moment for me, and I still get it, but when it was happening, it used to happen all the time, is the vampires,

Speaker 1 the eye color

Speaker 1 used to happen all the time that people would be like, oh, you have

Speaker 1 Cullen eyes or like, are you wearing Cullen contacts? And I was like, no, that's just my eyes. Apparently I'm just a vampire.

Speaker 1 I'm Stephanie Meyer's vampire, apparently.

Speaker 1 But contact lenses would actually dissolve in their eyes. Because venom.
Because venom. So they just, their eyes could get gold? So even if because like apparently it's like if

Speaker 1 a vampire drinks animal blood, then they get golden eyes. Oh, okay.
If they've just recently fed and had animal blood, they have golden eyes.

Speaker 1 If they've just recently fed off human blood and are satiated, they have bright red eyes. Which is why when they meet Laurentias, they're all

Speaker 1 vampires. They have super red eyes.
And so they said like if they were trying to hide the red eyes, they could do so with contacts, but they would dissolve in their eyes.

Speaker 1 eventually, like after a few hours. So they can't.
You could get a few hours out of it, but it would dissolve. Okay.
So that's interesting. That's in the illustrated guide.

Speaker 1 That's in the illustrated guide. How did I know? How did you know? But the vibe of the movies are the best.
They're just good. They're vibe.
It's like, honestly, the color palette.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you've really, you've really taken me to a place of color palette. See,

Speaker 1 it's so cozy with like the greens and the rain. It's got a blue tint to things.
And one thing about these, all of these movies, I'm pretty sure

Speaker 1 the soundtrack is, especially for the first one and the second one,

Speaker 1 such banger, banger after banger. That when it first starts, when the full moon turns white, that's when I'll come home.

Speaker 1 And then

Speaker 1 when she's like, when they're driving into forks, there's so many movie sploofs that we have to talk about. Oh, yeah.
When that big logging truck passes by. Oh my God.
And there's no one driving it.

Speaker 1 No one's driving it. No one's driving the truck.
How did that even happen?

Speaker 1 How did that even occur?

Speaker 1 They're pulling it to the forward wheeling. I'm like, what? It's an 18-wheeler that no one is driving.
I'm like, did you guys like CGI him out of there somehow?

Speaker 1 Like, who's like, please tell me what happened? What's going on? Also, this is the movie where we get the.

Speaker 1 I think that's like right before Bella gets hit by the car. Oh, and it's almost.
Perfect. When it goes,

Speaker 1 I'm like, ah, like it just gets you. Oh, I love it so much.
There is something with that. I also, again, as a black hole.
On my hatch alarm every morning.

Speaker 1 And then it starts the haw.

Speaker 1 And it, great way to wake up. I got to get one.
I'll tell you, it's a really great way to wake up. But yeah, soundtracks, like you said, supermassive black Hole.
Oh. I mean, the Spotlight songs.

Speaker 1 When they finally.

Speaker 1 We're about to get sued by like 15 different bands. No, we love you.
Okay. Yeah, we're singing your praises, literally.

Speaker 1 But it's so good. And there's, I think she did a good job of stylizing it.
Yeah. Because the books are very,

Speaker 1 like, the books

Speaker 1 have that, like,

Speaker 1 have way more repression, it feels like, weaved within. Yeah.
And the movie kind of lets them a little more like

Speaker 1 they're dressed better. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And, like, for the most part. And it just all feels a little more like, I can, I can go along with this.

Speaker 1 It's so funny watching it now, though, because I remember like when I watched it when I was like 12 or 13, I was like, I need to start dressing like Bella and wear headbands in my hair like Bella does.

Speaker 1 And I need to be Bella because boys will love me. Yeah.
Bella dresses like shit.

Speaker 1 Bella dresses like shit.

Speaker 1 I watched it. When we watched it recently, I was like, what the fuck is she wearing in every scene?

Speaker 1 She's wearing like bowling shirts over.

Speaker 1 There's a lot. It's horrible.

Speaker 1 A couple of her shirts, I was like, okay, I would have probably worn that. There wasn't one shirt that I was aware of.
There was a couple that I was like, I feel like I would wear that. That's crazy.

Speaker 1 Her hair. Definitely, she says, she has great hair.
Great hair. Great hair.
I remember being like, that's how I pictured Bella's hair.

Speaker 1 Not in the, I can't remember if it's, I think it's the third movie. Kristen Stewart had just done

Speaker 1 fucking

Speaker 1 The Rockin. Oh, The Rockin'.
The Jet. Joan Jett.
Joan Jett. Joan Jett.
Yeah, she had just done that. So she had to cut her hair.
Yeah, like, obviously, in Joan Jett's hairstyle.

Speaker 1 So she has one of the worst wigs of all time in that movie. There's some egregious wigs.
There are some egregious wigs. Yeah, like there's some

Speaker 1 Rosalie's wigs. Rosalie's wigs she had to wear because they fucked her hair up so bad after the first movie.
Which, if you look at her hair in the first movie, she has beautiful hair, but it's fried.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you can tell. And we'll get to that when we do the other movie.
Yeah, we will.

Speaker 1 But yeah, it's, I said, the outfits, they're very of the time. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I remember Edward. I loved his outfits.
His great coats were great. His pea coats.
Love it. I loved his peacoats.
Honey. Loved it.

Speaker 1 I especially love, I think when we were watching it, there's a scene when Mike is like trying to ask Bella to prom.

Speaker 1 and Edward is just standing in the back.

Speaker 1 One thing I loved is what an absolute dick Edward was. Yeah, we've set us all up.
We've been here before. We, we, you know, like, this is who I am.
Okay.

Speaker 1 And so I love that he's literally laughing in the background, like this guy. Because he could also hear Mike's thoughts.
He can't hear it and Bella's answers too. Thanks and her thoughts.

Speaker 1 So he's sitting, or not her thoughts, he can't hear her thoughts. But he can hear like her answers through Mike's thoughts.
Yeah. And he's sitting there laughing in the background.

Speaker 1 And you know, he's sitting there being like, I got a fucking peacoat. You're like,

Speaker 1 what you think you're going to prom with her? Get a peacoat. Like, get a gray peacoat, my friend.
For Mike. Poor Mike.
Let's go into, we got to talk about Mike and Jessica.

Speaker 1 They make Jessica, they do make Jessica the ultimate villain, especially

Speaker 1 for Jessica. Like in this movie, she definitely gets villainized.
In New Moon,

Speaker 1 they turn her into like a twat. And it's not fair because

Speaker 1 Bella is a bitch. Like she's a bitch when she goes into anyone.
Everyone is being nice to her.

Speaker 1 People are trying to be like Jessica is one of the first people to talk to her and welcome her here and like talk.

Speaker 1 And it's like, she's like villain and Bella gives no one the time of day and acts like she's annoyed that anyone's being nice to her. I don't know why they all keep trying.

Speaker 1 And then the thing with Jessica is it's like Jessica's a teenage girl. She immediately befriended Bella, tried to integrate her in.

Speaker 1 And then she gets jealous that the guy she likes is obsessed with bella the second she met meets her that's just normal yeah that's i too would be pretty pissed if the guy i was like crushing on was obsessed with the new girl and i think that she said something like she's they've all known each other since like kindergarten yeah so it's like that sucks yeah and it's like and they make her such a villain they do and it's like she's not she's like and she even she even asks bella at one point if it's okay that she goes to the dance with mike yeah and she what the fuck does she have to do that for you've been around forever you don't have to ask her, but she does just to make sure there's no like weirdness I'm like they villainized her.

Speaker 1 It's not cool and they also try to make Bella like more likable by her being like oh, you should ask Jessica. Yeah, but it's like

Speaker 1 it makes Jessica look like well. They make and I mean it's how Bella is also written.
She's like that girl. Yeah.
I'm not like other girls. Yeah, you know, like that girl.

Speaker 1 And it's like I'm gonna wear leggings under my dress. Oh my god.
We're gonna get to that. We're gonna get to that.
But I think Anna Kendrick is the perfect Jessica.

Speaker 1 she really is she killed it as soon as you see her you say jessica yeah jessica in the movie yep and i think uh mike is a great cast yeah i think mike is super endearing yeah just kind of like he's a teenage boy you can honestly the whole friend group i feel like is very like believable yeah like angela yeah mike they're all really well done i think like they're likable They are.

Speaker 1 They're super likable. And they're like, I don't know.
They're just sweet. They're like throwing Twizzlers at her and shit.
They eat so many Twizzlers in this this movie. They eat so many Twizzlers.

Speaker 1 It's just brought to you by Twizzlers. I will say it really was.
I will say, I don't like that they have everyone like falling all over themselves about Bella.

Speaker 1 Like, that's very unrealistic and also like kind of weird and gross because.

Speaker 1 At one point, like while she's sitting at the table, Tyler runs up behind her and is like, my girl, and kisses her on the cheek. Yeah.
Is that Tyler? Is that Eric? That's Tyler.

Speaker 1 And Eric is sitting next to her because he had said something like,

Speaker 1 like, Bella's my girl. Like, basically.
And I was like, what's happening? like what is and you can tell jessica jessica literally is like oh my god

Speaker 1 the way she's like i forget what she said she's like you're the new shiny toy like but she's like oh my god yeah she's like this is disgusting you can tell she's like what the is going on and also the way he kisses her at lunch i said inappropriate inappropriate and also they're so mean to like the boys are so mean to jessica and angela oh my god eric like shits all over Angela.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And I'm like, the feature is dead.
Don't bring it up again. And then just leaves.
And she's like, damn. Do you guys just

Speaker 1 not want to be like, what's going on here? Like, what the fuck? But this is also where we get the Colin entrance. They are 32-year-olds walking into this cafeteria.
They're all wearing white.

Speaker 1 And most importantly, Emmet is carrying a bag, a bag full of at least a dozen hard-boiled eggs.

Speaker 1 And I have never noticed it, but we all got into a discussion the other day when we were talking about like the weird sploooofs in this movie. And Elena was like, the eggs.
I was like, the eggs?

Speaker 1 The eggs. I never saw that before.
You'll never unsee it. You'll never unsee it.
And fun fact, that was just Kellen Lutz's lunch, which is who plays Emmett. Yeah.

Speaker 1 You know, you just gotta eat some eggs. I love a hard-boiled egg, so I'm not one to

Speaker 1 eat a hard-boiled egg. I could not eat 12.
I would die. But he's

Speaker 1 like a, he's a big guy. I can eat one and then I'm like, damn.
Yeah. Honestly.
But that, and I like that. My one with some soy sauce or some hot sauce.

Speaker 1 You know, I can't just, I just can't do that to the face. You can't just

Speaker 1 like your raw dog, a hard-boiled egg like that. As you should not.
But

Speaker 1 their entrances are just wild because it's like Alice gets like Jasper, the Confederate soldier, just twirls Alice. Yeah, they just run way into this cafeteria like it's mouth.
Like, what?

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 that's when we see Edward for the first time, of course. And this is where I had my initial disappointment.
I can't believe you felt it again. I was a fan of disappointment in this moment.

Speaker 1 I think this was my sexual awakening. And that's, I again, I say, it was not because I thought Robert Pattinson was not attractive or ugly or what did you picture? Do you remember?

Speaker 1 I think I just pictured,

Speaker 1 like, I'm trying to think of exactly what I pictured in my head.

Speaker 1 I

Speaker 1 probably pictured more

Speaker 1 of, I'm trying to think of,

Speaker 1 I don't know, I think he was like not

Speaker 1 I don't know what I got I'm trying to think in my head I'm trying to like picture it sometimes it's hard to describe the picture that you have in your head when I'm trying to think of anybody who fits that picture I think what I think um Hayden Christensen was one of the ones that was gonna be cast yeah

Speaker 1 it was in talks I think or like fans wanted him to be yeah yeah yeah

Speaker 1 And I was very much a Hayden Christensen girly when I was younger. I loved him.
Very, very good-looking man.

Speaker 1 And I think he's more along the lines of what I pictured, but I don't even think he is the thing I pictured. I think he's just a little closer to what I pictured.
Okay.

Speaker 1 I think he, I think I pictured him like very ethereal looking. And I think it's hard for a human being to look at.
Into ethereal. I see what you're saying.
Like it's a difficult one to cast, I think.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 I think he looks, I think he is like the perfect Robert. Well, and I think

Speaker 1 the perfect Edward, I mean, he was the perfect Robert as well. Like, he really was.
He's like, don't say that. But he totally started fitting it for me.
And I think I saw like his interviews and shit.

Speaker 1 I just ended up loving him. Like, I thought he was awesome.
So I was very into it then.

Speaker 1 But we get that weird like staring thing.

Speaker 1 Well,

Speaker 1 when he walks by, he laughs because he can hear Jessica being like, oh, yeah. I think she says, like, you know, like, he would just, I guess none of us are good enough for him.

Speaker 1 Like every girl in school wants to date him, but we're not good enough for him. Yeah.
And he laughs when

Speaker 1 he walks by. I can hear that.
Yeah. And then we go into the biology class where we get one of the cringiest scenes that I have ever seen committed to film.

Speaker 1 I literally wrote down I would not survive this interaction with Edward. I would jump out of the science lab window and I would board the next flight to Arizona.

Speaker 1 I literally said this would send me packing. She walks into science class or biology class.
In front of a fan. In front of the fan.

Speaker 1 It wafts on over to Edward and he acts like she smells like hot garbage liquefied he does this body roll of he rutches he has a full retch rutches and then and he literally like like slides something over to her with his knuckle like he won't even touch it with his face he's just like get the fuck out and he's literally like holding his face away from her but also staring at her as she's looking straight ahead and she's like oh my god he's just like oh like staring at her like she's like the most putrid thing i would not survive this and also

Speaker 1 what the bella because halfway through that class i would have been like can i fucking help you like how are you not turning to that boy and being like what the fuck's your problem like i confront him yeah because it's not like he's like actively trying to get away from her he is but he's also staring at her he's he's diabolicing her like like a monkey and he's just staring like

Speaker 1 i would literally turn around and just like stick my finger in my nose and be like what like what like bella needed to get a little more assertive with that shit yeah well she's

Speaker 1 Bella's so baby girl coded. She is so baby girl coded.

Speaker 1 But at the same time, he's not safe with her at some point. At some point, she gets so aggressive that I was like, you should wait.
It took me a minute to like process what you were saying.

Speaker 1 Like she gets really aggressive at the end of the movie.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 But that interaction just fucked me up. And then when they she, like they go into like the administrative office after and he's like, okay, fine, I guess I'll just endure it.

Speaker 1 I guess I'll have to endure it. Like, because he wants to switch and he just like flies by her.
And she had come into the office and then just leaves. Yeah, so I don't know why she was there.

Speaker 1 And she does that like lip-sucking thing that she does. She doobie.
Here's the thing. She do be making some.
Kristen Stewart is a great actress. She's a great actress.

Speaker 1 What the fuck was she doing in this movie? Lots of faces. She doesn't do that face all the time.
Like, it's her doing the like,

Speaker 1 I wish

Speaker 1 sucking in her lip. And I said, I wish you could see that.
And in fact, you must see that. So I will video it for you right now.
Live videoing. All right, am I doing it? Yeah, go, go, girl.

Speaker 1 And she leaves. And we'll be posting that.
She literally does this, that weird, like, I'm just going to eat my lip. I'm going to eat my lip.
I'm going to eat my lip. I'm not going to eat my lip.

Speaker 1 And then she just leaves. And you're like, I'm not going to eat my lip.
Final decision. I'm not going to eat my lip.
Wait, wait. So like that happens.
Edward doesn't come to school for a few days.

Speaker 1 In the interim, she goes to the diner with her dad.

Speaker 1 Pause.

Speaker 1 Charlie?

Speaker 1 Yeah, but everybody pause for Zaddy Charlie. Charlie.

Speaker 1 Worst father.

Speaker 1 Not of the year, but like one of the worst dad. Not of the book.

Speaker 1 In the book, he's far worse than he is in the movie. In the movie, you at least get the sense that he cares.
He's just awkward.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he cares that he's awkward, but like later on, he also just lets her leave his home. He sure does.
And like he's a police officer. He's like the police officer, in fact.
Like we'll get there.

Speaker 1 He's the chief. Yeah,

Speaker 1 we'll get there.

Speaker 1 But he's hot, so we'll take it. He is so hot.
Yeah. Watching Twilight as an adult is realizing that you're not Team Edward or Jacob.
You are Team Charlie Swan or boss. Oh my god.

Speaker 1 Totally. And I need to be clear with who Stephanie Meyer wanted to cast as Charlie.
You better be.

Speaker 1 John C. Riley.

Speaker 1 And here's the thing.

Speaker 1 I love John C. Riley.
Who doesn't? I think he's hilarious.

Speaker 1 Imagine if he's Chee Charlie.

Speaker 1 If he was Chee Charlie,

Speaker 1 we get Billy Burke. And I am for Billy Burke in this movie.
Billy Burke is A-plus behavior in this movie.

Speaker 1 I don't even care what he does. And he looks, there's like a familial resemblance between him and Bella for sure.
He looks like the age fits, the familial

Speaker 1 John C. Riley would have been a wild choice.
It would have been, honestly, I would like him to like, can they remake the movie? I know

Speaker 1 you can read some of the lines and like dress as Chief Swan and just like give us that. I'm gonna need one of the late night hosts to have him on and make him read those lines.
I'm gonna need that.

Speaker 1 Like, I'm gonna need that. Although his lines are pretty basic, they are.

Speaker 1 That's true. But in this scene,

Speaker 1 like, aside from Charlie Swan just being super hot,

Speaker 1 there's a ketchup bottle. And

Speaker 1 Kristen Kristen Sewart, Bella, takes the ketchup bottle. Limp wrist.
Limp wrist. Just lops it on her plate, but nothing comes out.
And then the scene is shot from a different angle.

Speaker 1 And it's just ketchup on the plate.

Speaker 1 And she just does this like shaky, shaky, and then puts it down. Nothing comes out.
Nothing ever comes out of that bottle.

Speaker 1 And it's not even one of those bottles where like you have to hit the 57 for it to come out or like the 52, whatever it is. It's a squeeze bottle.

Speaker 1 And she's not squeezing it. She's simply limp wristing.
Licking it. It's the weirdest.
She does this with a few other things because later

Speaker 1 she gets a glass of water. She pours a glass of water.
No, the water might be.

Speaker 1 I think the water might take the ketchup, right? She pours a full glass of water out of the fridge, puts it back, puts the jug back. Yep.

Speaker 1 Stands in front of the sink, takes one sip of water, and then just flips the water over and dumps it all out. But the way she flicks it is so just like.

Speaker 1 And it's one sip, whole glass of water, one sip, blip, right into the skin full.

Speaker 1 I was like, what the fuck was the point of that?

Speaker 1 Also, and we'll get into it a little bit more, but just because we're talking about weird mannerisms, when Edward sits down at the table, the first time we see him, he just places like two fingers on the table.

Speaker 1 He does this weird like finger thing that he's always like

Speaker 1 just delicately touching

Speaker 1 pageant hands. They're like praying mantis hands.
Like he's just like,

Speaker 1 yeah. Like he barely touches surfaces or like things in front of him.
It's very creepy. I think they were all just like really uncomfortable Phil.

Speaker 1 Yes. Everybody seems very uncomfortable.

Speaker 1 Anna Kendrick likened it to a hostage situation. She said they were all trauma bonded because it was like a hostage situation.
That makes sense. And Emmett, we're better for it.

Speaker 1 Kellen Lutz almost didn't come back for the last two movies, he said, because he was just standing around on set so often. Because he doesn't have a lot to do.
That's the thing.

Speaker 1 He said he was like falling out of love with acting. Oh man.
Yeah. So damn.
I can't imagine the vibe on the set was was like super immaculate. Awesome.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Well, and we get like another scene, like you were just pointing out the scene at the table where you got the carrot. The fingers.

Speaker 1 And Rosalie is just takes a little carrot and she's just staring at Bella. And she's dead in her white outfit and her white hat.
And she just takes that carrot, she places it within her lips.

Speaker 1 And then it's almost like a kazoo that she's just like,

Speaker 1 she just on a carrot because she looks like she's treating it like a kazoo. and she just places it there, but doesn't ever take a bite.
And it's because in the illustrated guide,

Speaker 1 they don't eat food. If they have to eat food, like to blend in.
To blend in. They don't digest food.
So what happens is they eat that food. It sits in a ball somewhere inside of them.

Speaker 1 And then they hack it up like a cat packs up in a hairball later. That's they will literally regurgitate it.
later. That's not good.
That's not hot. That's not hot at all.

Speaker 1 If my man is having a hairball. And like, I'm sorry, you're you're making my vampires so that they're just like regurgitating food later.
Yeah. I don't like that.
I don't like that at all.

Speaker 1 I don't like it either. Another thing I don't like is when she walks back into biology class and I think it's Mike goes, How you liking Durain, girl? Oh my God.
But he says it's the most egregious.

Speaker 1 It's such a weird line. Most egregious greeting.
He not only does he scream, how you liking Durain, girl, at her, but he he also shakes his fucking umbrella on her.

Speaker 1 I'd kill him with that umbrella.

Speaker 1 There's so many lines. There's lines in future movies like Bella, Where the Hell You Been, Loca? That just send me into orbit.

Speaker 1 I think, honestly, Bella, Where the Hell You Been, Loca, is such a good line, but like, it's so good that people forget how good it is. How good, how good, how you liken Durain, girl.

Speaker 1 Like, that's such a weird fucking line, but I and I hate it, but I love it. There's so many lines like that near those.

Speaker 1 Like, we're gonna get to them, and I will yell them loud and proud when they come.

Speaker 1 So many. I will yell them loud and proud.
Wait, so then after how you like an array girl, Paula sits down at the table after Edward just left for days because she smelled super fucking putrid.

Speaker 1 He's sitting there and he acts like everything is A-okay. And he says to her, Hello.

Speaker 1 He goes, Why is he Swedish? When he says, oh, she sits down and he goes, hello.

Speaker 1 He sounds almost like the wandering oak

Speaker 1 in frozen. Where he's like, oh.

Speaker 1 Some is hail.

Speaker 1 Speak some of the

Speaker 1 And obviously like

Speaker 1 Robert Pattinson is like British, right? He sure is.

Speaker 1 Obviously like his accent comes out sometimes. But this isn't even his accent.
It's a Swedish accent.

Speaker 1 Hello.

Speaker 1 Hello.

Speaker 1 It's the way he says it. There's another part.
I'm trying to find exactly how he says it. Oh, my God.
Because there's another

Speaker 1 moment where Robert Pattinson slips into like a weird Scottish. Oh, I wrote it down.
Hold on. Oh, wait.
Here it is. Oh, he says, so you're worried.

Speaker 1 So you're worried. So So you're worried.
And then he just goes right into his regular accent.

Speaker 1 Full Scottish. So you're worried.

Speaker 1 I love the Swedish accent. It's fucking crazy.
Very Swedish, very Norwegian.

Speaker 1 And then they just like have this cute interaction about

Speaker 1 science. But this is Bella's first moment of, he's like, so are you liking the rain? Because they've never met.
They don't know each other.

Speaker 1 You're going to fucking talk to me about the goddamn weather? And she does. She literally, he says that.
He's like, so are you, how are you liking the rain? And she literally goes,

Speaker 1 like, lets out this, like, shaky, like, ha, bro.

Speaker 1 And she goes,

Speaker 1 you're going to ask me about the weather?

Speaker 1 Like, it's just like, what the fuck? No, and I'm screaming. My, my watch just told me this is a loud environment.

Speaker 1 Your watch is like, calm the fuck down, Mitches. We hit 90 decibels.
30 minutes of this could. We're giving you guys temporary hearings.
I'm sorry sorry for that, but it's worth it. Okay.

Speaker 1 Because she says,

Speaker 1 she's like, she literally,

Speaker 1 she's on the, she's on the edge. In that moment, she's on the edge.
And then it's like, you want, you're going to talk to me about the weather? I'm like, what do you want?

Speaker 1 By that, by that,

Speaker 1 she's like, she wants him to talk dirty to her. Like, it's like, you, she's like, why are you talking to me about the weather? I'm literally on the edge of glory here.

Speaker 1 She says, I want to fuck on this your lab table.

Speaker 1 So weird. The like response.

Speaker 1 I know she was trying to do her, like, because it's supposed to be that she's she's like enamored with him right away but it's like you don't need to I don't know it was just the way it came out I was like that's a lot it's wild so

Speaker 1 um I think there is um a moment when she's talking during like during this part when she talks to her friends where they're like oh are you gonna come to La Push with us yeah yeah yeah and she's like am I supposed to know what that means and it's like Maybe you are because that's where like your best friend growing up Jacob lives.

Speaker 1 Like,

Speaker 1 La Push is like kind of his beach. So it's like, I I don't, why wouldn't you know that? And it's like, also, like, she's just so fucking rude.
It's the way she says things.

Speaker 1 Should I know what that means?

Speaker 1 Yeah, I, yeah, you should, probably. It's like, you're friends with Jacob.

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 1 we get also around this part the apple, the book cover moment. The apple.
And then before that, he had saved her from the crash. Yep.
And she meets Carlisle. Yep.

Speaker 1 She meets the hailest doctor that has ever lived. I loved Carlisle.
I was, I was not a Carlisle girl. I was into Carl.
But I was 12 when this this came on, so I was not meant to be a Carlisle girl.

Speaker 1 And I just love, he's, I love a, you know, light-haired, you do dead-looking man. Yeah, we'll be talking about that in True Blood later.
We will be.

Speaker 1 That's the cover of the book. And Stephanie Meyer said that it's supposed to be the illusion of like the

Speaker 1 forbidden fruit. And like it is tied to the Bible with like,

Speaker 1 you have a choice. Are you going to take the apple and ruin everything? Or are you going to not take the apple? I take the apple.
Interesting.

Speaker 1 But he does When he does the little, like, presenting, like the, I was like, wow. Also, I would be like, you just kicked that up.
So not only did you get germs on my apple, but you also bruised it.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you fucking asshole. I'm surprised she didn't say, like, I can't believe you just fucking kicked my apple.
God. Not to him.
Anyone else, she would. Yeah.

Speaker 1 But when they go to La Push and they see Jacob and his friends, and they mention that, like,

Speaker 1 Bella had asked Edward if he wanted to come, but he was like, no. This is where Jessica's a little bit of a bitch because she's like,

Speaker 1 bella asked edward but he didn't come but he's not here but i think she's also trying to be like hey mike she invited edward like she doesn't like you so please stop like busting after her because i like you i think it's teenage girlship it is it is but when that kid goes the colins shall come here yes because like jacob and his friends come and that's when he's like the colins don't come here period and bella's like whoa and then they go on a walk on the beach and she's like so what did your friend mean when he said the colins don't come here and jacob goes you caught that huh?

Speaker 1 It's like the kid, fuck do you mean the kid locked eyes with her and screamed it at her face?

Speaker 1 Of course, I caught that. That was a nutshell.
He launched it directly at me. I had no choice but to catch that.
Yeah, like, damn. Yeah,

Speaker 1 I love that. I love that.
And she's also trying to like flirt with Jacob to get information out of him.

Speaker 1 And Bella Swan flirting is the funniest fucking shit you'll ever see in your life because she kind of just like leans her head a little bit closer and like

Speaker 1 looks up at him but it's menacing she does this weird like head shake thing where she's like i i want to know i'd love and she shakes her head a lot it's almost like she thinks that the like eyelash fluttering is actually like head shaking so she does that it's a lot it's something later well because she finds out like there's a you know the legend the quillute tribe has of like the the hillside for wolves and there's these like the cold ones the treaty all that stuff so she later she goes on and googs and she googs about you know legends of that that tribe.

Speaker 1 And one of the books that comes up is called Legends of the Slapping Beaver.

Speaker 1 I just need to point that out. It's not a real book.
I looked it up. We tried.
We tried to find it. But my God, I love that they put that in.

Speaker 1 And then she ends up going dress shopping at one point with Angela and Jessica. They invite her.
Like, you're new. And we're inviting you into our shopping trip to have a girls' night.

Speaker 1 That's some like, not, that doesn't happen to everyone. No.
Like, like you've been a new kid. I was a new kid.
I was lucky. You were at welcome.
I was pretty cool.

Speaker 1 I gotta say, on my first day at my new high school, I made friends like the first day, and they were like, You want to come hang out tonight? And I was like, Fuck yeah, I did.

Speaker 1 But it's like, that doesn't happen for everyone. I came home and Elena was like, Are you? I literally, I was like, Do you think mom would let me go out tonight? Like, I made friends.

Speaker 1 And Elena goes, What? Are you fucking kidding me?

Speaker 1 What do you mean you made friends already, you bitch?

Speaker 1 But yeah, that doesn't happen for everyone. I had a better experience at my second high school than I did at my first.
Well,

Speaker 1 Bella is being integrated into this group very luckily and very nicely. Elena would say to her, are you fucking kidding me? Are you fucking kidding me, Bella? My God.
And she treats them like shit.

Speaker 1 They are trying on dresses. She's not even looking at them.
She's like in her own thing. And then she just gets up and bails.
Like doesn't even pay attention to them.

Speaker 1 I was like, why are you trying to be friends with her? I'd be like, fuck this girl. Yeah.
She's like, I have to go to like a bookstore. I have to go to a bookstore.

Speaker 1 And she goes to the bookstore to get the Legends book. And it's also like, could you not have just been like, hey, when we're done trying on drugs, or when you guys are done.

Speaker 1 When you come to this bookstore with me. That's how friendship works.
No, she just decided to bail on them. Rude.
And that's, she's just going to obsess over Edward for the rest of her life.

Speaker 1 She doesn't need friends. Yeah.
It really is so toxic when you get into toxic. And this is really where it becomes like so bad.
Ridiculously insane.

Speaker 1 Because she ends up getting like running into these like drunk guys. You try to walk down a fucking alley.
What are you doing walking down an alley?

Speaker 1 and these drunk guys are gross and disgusting and they like are going to assault her essentially and edward shows up in his volvo

Speaker 1 he is and like growls at them when i'm sorry when he this i would have been the most toxic woman

Speaker 1 when he growls at them yeah and then he's like get in the car

Speaker 1 and he's like you didn't know what they

Speaker 1 And then he's like, you didn't know what they were thinking. And she's like, you did? I'd be like, save me every night.
And they like, they end up going to dinner.

Speaker 1 And she's like, but Jessica and Angela are like, Hey, where you been? We had no fucking clue where you were, we've been calling you, like, what the fuck? Like, lost you.

Speaker 1 They're all like, What the fuck? And then, even in that moment, they're still rooting for her,

Speaker 1 like, they're like, Oh, yeah, go to dinner, like, have dinner, fail on us. Like, it's cool, yeah.

Speaker 1 It's like, damn, you really lucked into these gals, and you should hang on to them and treat them better.

Speaker 1 But she, so she goes to um dinner with Edward, Edward, and his song is playing in the background, his song is playing

Speaker 1 like Harold,

Speaker 1 exactly that's it

Speaker 1 that was it and then he's a clip

Speaker 1 I mean can you tell the difference you can't thank you uh but

Speaker 1 she they talk about like

Speaker 1 you know what like that

Speaker 1 basically what's going on like that he's been stalking her essentially she's literally like how did you know I was gonna be here he's like I was following he He says, I was following in case anything happened to you, which is sweet in theory, but you like think about it as an adult and you're like, just stalking her.

Speaker 1 Ah, like, I don't want to be followed by you. No, I don't take care of myself.
But that's the thing about Bella.

Speaker 1 That's where she's like, baby girl coded because she doesn't want to have to take care of herself. No.
And there's a reason for that, though, that makes sense.

Speaker 1 Because when you look at her parents, her mom, we didn't even touch on her mom. Her mom's a fucking

Speaker 1 wreck. Sucks.
Her mom sucks. Fuck you, really.
Her mom, the reason she went to Forks is because her mom is together with a minor league baseball player named Phil.

Speaker 1 And she's unhappy that she can't travel around with him and that she has to stay with her child. And Bella picks up her.
So Bella's like, do you want me to leave so you can do that?

Speaker 1 And she's like, that'd be sick.

Speaker 1 That's it. She's an asshole.
Yeah, she sucks. Her mom's like a total, like, hot mess asshole.
She's not like a cute, fun, like, oh, I'm just like a Lorelei Gilmore kind of like, you know, messy mom.

Speaker 1 She just sucks. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And then also, like, in the book, Charlie is very. Yeah.
And in the book, she had to take care of her mom essentially, like parentified child.

Speaker 1 And then she had to take care of her dad in the book, too. Yeah.
Like, she cooks him all his meals and shit. Like, he's just always, like, working or fishing.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 And so, like, she really did, I think she looks at this as like fucking take care of her. Everyone can just take care of me now.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 So I think she was, this was like learned toxic behavior, unfortunately, that she was like searching for something.

Speaker 1 Which is also like weird because then like her boyfriend becomes her dad. Yeah, it's very weird.
And then also like when Jacob or when like we'll get into it in New Moon, but like

Speaker 1 Edward leaves and then like Jacob steps in and like she's weird. There's also like so much imagery of her being carried around all the time.
Yes. And it's like she's always really weird.
Yeah, it is.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And

Speaker 1 in this conversation, he's saying how like he can read mine, but he can't read hers.

Speaker 1 And I was like, oh, so you read the Suki Stakos

Speaker 1 books? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Because that's literally true blood. Yeah.
Like, that's just true blood. And the Suki Stackhouse books were out at a time.

Speaker 1 So, like, maybe that just interested her that they could read minds, and maybe one person can block it. Yeah.
It's definitely reminiscent of it.

Speaker 1 There was a few things, too, and I can't think of them now, but like, if you go back and listen to our rewatcher episodes for Buffy, I was like, oh, yeah. That's where she got.

Speaker 1 She was definitely, I think Stephanie Meyer was definitely like

Speaker 1 inspired.

Speaker 1 She was absorbing a lot of this kind of material so i'm sure like bits and pieces of it just came into her lore yeah but this is one that i was just we're watching true blood right now so it just like stuck out to me as like oh the one person whose mind you can't read it's like flipped around

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Speaker 1 Now, and then we get the fucking scene where he pulls her into the. Because she figures out he's a vampire.
Yeah. And he pulls her into the fucking woods at school.
This is...

Speaker 1 No other movie has touched me in a moment quite like this. This,

Speaker 1 he's so aggressive in this moment.

Speaker 1 Say it

Speaker 1 out loud. I know what you are.
And she's standing with her arms in front of her, which is a very awkward stance.

Speaker 1 She's essentially doing like the Wednesday adams, when the sun goes down and the moon comes up.

Speaker 1 That one turns into a teenage goo-goo mug. She does.

Speaker 1 She does turn into a teenage coo mug. In these ones, fellow is a teenage goo-goo mug.

Speaker 1 She's a teenage goo-goo mug.

Speaker 1 That is for sure. Candidate.
That is for sure. And he's just standing behind her like,

Speaker 1 say it.

Speaker 1 It's like, oh my God. And she goes, vampire.
Vampyr.

Speaker 1 Vampier. It's Tom Lake in the coffee episode.

Speaker 1 Tom Lake, come on the show. Oh, wait, you did.

Speaker 1 Oh, that's a Rewatcher reference. Go listen to The Rewatcher from the beginning.
Do it. Hey.

Speaker 1 But yeah, he's so aggressive, though. He grabs her arm and literally drags her through the forest and up a mountain.
This is when he screams, as if you could outrun me. We're not there yet, baby.

Speaker 1 We're not there yet. Because first, one thing about me, one thing about me is that I'm always there.
I'm always in a place of, as if as if you could outrun me.

Speaker 1 But first, we have to get to a place of, I'm sad and sparkly. So first, he has to go up there, rip open his shirt, and show that he just looks a little sweaty.
I love it.

Speaker 1 Like, he just looks a little sweaty. I love it.
And then he says, this is the skin of a killer, Bella.

Speaker 1 The best.

Speaker 1 There's so many good lines. So many good lines.
Skin of a killer. Skin of a killer, Bella.
And then he starts zooming around. He's like,

Speaker 1 he crouches. He literally huffs and puffs and like hunches over and says, I love you, Kudo Rod.

Speaker 1 I told you he's the tree miser. He's crunching.

Speaker 1 And then he just starts crouching in trees, which goes crazy.

Speaker 1 And she's just looking up at him and he's like, aren't I a hot vampire? And I'm like, no. I don't even think he's trying to.
He's going all nimbly bibly from tree to tree. And I need you to get down

Speaker 1 but then she becomes very aggressive because she's like no I want it I love it I think I want to marry you I love you and he's like I've killed people though and I've wanted to kill you from the second I laid eyes on you and she's like she's like but I love you I'm fine with it and even Edward or no Robert Pattinson later was like something's wrong with her

Speaker 1 he was like he was like Edward literally says to her I've wanted to kill you since the moment I met you and she's like but I love you I'd still hit it she says to him I don't know if it's in in the woods or if it's when they're at dinner.

Speaker 1 She says, I don't have the strength to stay away from you anymore. Like, what the fuck? Or did, wait, does he say that? Actually, now that I think about it, he probably says that.
He says that.

Speaker 1 But either way, they've been, they've met each other 4.5 seconds ago. Yeah, it's not okay.
We need to be real about it. It's not okay.

Speaker 1 But he's so upfront about how much he wants to kill her. And she's like, it's cool.
Yeah. You've let me know.
So thank you. Thanks for watching.
And that's it.

Speaker 1 And it's like, all right, I guess we put that on paper. So there's that.
She's a temptress.

Speaker 1 She is.

Speaker 1 And this is when they decide that they're going to be together because they lay in the meadow and he's sparkling. And it's real weird.
I think her foot's gone in this. The foot is gone.

Speaker 1 In the CGI, they take her foot out by accident. It happens, you know, sloppy.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 But then they end up going to school the next day and they show up together. And this is when Spotlight plays.

Speaker 1 And this is when he says,

Speaker 1 this is when he says, I'm going to hell anyways. This is what bothers me because he's like, since I'm going to hell.
And he puts his arm around her and like pulls her in.

Speaker 1 And he says this a couple of times, like the hell comment. I'm like, you're just going to say that.
Well, no, it's also like, you're dead. And that's it.

Speaker 1 Well, and it's also like, that's not part of the,

Speaker 1 like, it's just a weird. I don't know.
It does, like, since I'm going to hell. I think he has like just like a, he has like a self-hatred quality about him because he like hates that he's a monster.

Speaker 1 Yeah. In his own.
I'm just like, says who? Who says you're going? I think him. Like, what? Yeah.
But it's weird.

Speaker 1 But when it, and then, like, he explains his origin story to her, and he does so while it's pouring rain and he is staying outs like out of the cover of the rain just getting fucking soaked and she's just sitting there dry and then a minute like

Speaker 1 he's bone dry yeah and drouching things with his hands like fingers walking in front of him

Speaker 1 so strange it's very salad fingers esque of him it is it's a lot um and then she goes to this is when she goes to meet his uh family too and when he's like uh you worried like that's when he gets really Scottish yeah

Speaker 1 but this is when Rosalie breaks the bowl because she's just pissed. Oh my god, wait, before that, is that when

Speaker 1 Billy Black, Jacob's dad, and Edward passed away. They have a stare-off.
They have a stare-off. You can see the crew.
You can

Speaker 1 in Edward's ball, though. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Well,

Speaker 1 I think Rosalie also gets kind of a bad rap. I think she does.
She's pissed. Because if you think about, think about it logistically.
I'm thinking of it bare bones. Okay, hit me.

Speaker 1 You are a family, for all intents and purposes. Yeah, yeah.
For hundreds of years, you've been a family. You've had this plot, like plan.
You have a thing together.

Speaker 1 There is a literal law among your species that says you cannot let humans know who you are or what you are.

Speaker 1 And if you do, then your whole family is going to be in jeopardy. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And then he meets this girl and five seconds later, tells her everything about your species and way of life, breaking every law, endangering your entire family, and then brings her over and is like treat her nice treat her nice i would have broken a bowl too i would have been like you dumb

Speaker 1 are you kidding she's right yeah so when you guys stop making googly eyes at each other we're all gonna have our heads ripped off and be burned what's fair like really it's fair is it worth it like and she she already ate what the fuck i was just gonna say that's what really does rosalie in is they're preparing this beautiful meal for bella yeah and and edward because it's not even bella bella's like oh my god like you didn't have to do that thing Thank you.

Speaker 1 And he's like, she already ate. She already ate.
I'm like, you dick. And also when Rosalie like smashes the bowl, that's why the actress is wearing gloves in that scene.

Speaker 1 She cut her hand when she was when she had originally smashed. I do love it.
I thought that the gloves were just fashion. Yeah.
I mean, she's very fashion. She is.

Speaker 1 But I get everyone's like, calm down, Rosalie. No, I get it.
Can you talk about that? She's just mad. The khaki skirt.
Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 So she is apparently described as wearing a long khaki skirt in this scene

Speaker 1 and like a blue blouse, which Edward ends up becoming obsessed with. Because color is also if you want us to cover Midnight Sun, which is Edward's point of view of Twilight.
I've never read that.

Speaker 1 I will happily do that. We will do that.

Speaker 1 So, because there's a lot in that.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. The whole thing is.
I'm actually going to buy it right now as you talk. So maybe we should do that.
But he's obsessed with the blue blouse. But the long khaki skirt.

Speaker 1 And Stephanie Meyer later said that during her time of writing this and growing up, oh, khaki skirt was like a staple wardrobe piece. Which is diabolical.

Speaker 1 I don't remember that time period, but I don't know how old Stephanie Meyer is. Let me look.
She's 51, so she's older than I am. So I don't know.

Speaker 1 Maybe it was, but I thought thinking of Bella standing there wearing a long khaki skirt is really throwing me, especially with Rosalie standing there looking like a fucking snack. Yeah.

Speaker 1 in her gloves and everything. And you know she's looking at her being like, you khaki skirt.

Speaker 1 Are you fucking kidding me you're gonna endanger our entire family for this khaki skirt wearing bitch this khaki skirt blue blouse bitch just with a ponytail a ponytail ponytail uh-uh yeah it's very she's all that yeah um but yeah i thought i thought she i was like you know what justice for rosalie she's been through a lot yeah we skipped over to um that edward watches bella when she sleeps he does he does he does that a lot we glossy for that i mean there's not a lot to say about that but i just wanted to make sure it was in here yeah she he watches her while she's he's been doing it.

Speaker 1 We thought that was like top romance. Yeah.
When it came out, I mean, at least I did. I was like, oh my God.
Oh, my God. I hope that happens to me someday.
I hope some guy watches.

Speaker 1 That's my worst fucking nightmare. Yeah, that's we talk about that shit all the time.
Yeah. It's not good.
It's bad. It's never good.
It's the worst. And

Speaker 1 when they go up to his room

Speaker 1 and he's like, yeah, she's like, where's your bed? And I was like, all right, Bella, calm down, idiot. Like, you're not going to fuck here.

Speaker 1 And she's like, the one thing about Bella is she stays.

Speaker 1 She stays horny. Yeah.
Bella.

Speaker 1 She's horned up all the time.

Speaker 1 And she's always trying to fuck him. She's only repressed.
With the way he's described when you're like a teenager, I'm sure I would be like all over that too.

Speaker 1 But I love it because like he goes, you know, he's got all these books and, you know, Claire DeLune is playing.

Speaker 1 And he's like, you know, like, that's, I'm just listening to Debussy, you know, like, no big deal. And she's like, Claire Delune is great.
And it's supposed to be that, like, see? She's so different.

Speaker 1 I know that too. Yeah.
And I couldn't help it. I was like, my kids have several books that Claire Delune is in.

Speaker 1 Like, I know if I played Claire Delune right now, I'm pretty sure my youngest would be like, Claire Delune. Like, she would do great stuff.

Speaker 1 Like, it's, but they make it like this, this highly high-show, highbrow thing. Bella's not like other girls.
I'm not like other girls. I'm like, well, you're like my six-year-old.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 you're not that, you're not that like quirky. Like, sounds like you had the same lullaby book, Bell.
You had that book. So, but yeah, um, this is when I literally was like, Edward is not safe.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Because she's like, Can we fuck? Like, you can tell she's just like, so where do we fuck in here? And he was like, How about I just take you outside? He's like, How about we go flying? Let's go.

Speaker 1 Hold on, tight, spider monkey. And this is the spider monkey.
Hold on tight, spider monkey is diabolical. And the visual of when he jumps from tree to tree.
I'll nimbly bimbly.

Speaker 1 It's like he, he's in this weird position and also is just like, oh, like looking forward as he flies through the air. It's the least hot thing I can imagine.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 And then he's climbing up the tree, but barely touching it. And he just looks like how a bear would climb up a tree.
Okay, that I'm not mad at. The flying, I'm with you.
I'll sign off on that.

Speaker 1 You're not mad at the climbing up the tree? I'm not. Damn.
I want to climb up the tree. It's the way he looks.
He's like, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop. I mean, how do you climb up a tree?

Speaker 1 I don't climb up trees, so this would not do it for me to begin with. I'd be like, I'm not climbing up a tree.
I would rather climb up the tree.

Speaker 1 But yeah, it's a lot. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And at one point, Mike tells Bella that he doesn't like this Edward thing. Yeah.
And I'd be like, I don't give a fuck, Mike. When he goes, he just looks at you like you're something to eat.

Speaker 1 And I was like, that is quite possibly the worst writing I've ever heard. So heavy-handed.
It's such a clunky line. Yeah.
It's so clunky. Like, somebody should have heard that and been like,

Speaker 1 too much. Yeah, like, too much subtleties.
Look it up. And that's when

Speaker 1 they go and play baseball. And we get, we get Charlie.
So Belle is like, hey,

Speaker 1 so Edward's outside and he's taking me to play baseball. And he's like, what the fuck? And she's like, this is honestly so real.
Yeah. And she's like, he wants you to meet him.

Speaker 1 And he's cleaning his shotgun as he does. And he just flicks it closed.
Cinnamon. And he's like, cinnamon.

Speaker 1 And I said, holy shit. Yeah.
I don't know why, but I was like, Charlie. Charlie.

Speaker 1 It's being like, it's that dad thing.

Speaker 1 Because I was like, ooh, okay.

Speaker 1 But I'm into it.

Speaker 1 But they go to play baseball. And this is the supermassive black hole, the very classic baseball scene where they play during a thunderstorm so no one can hear it.
Couldn't sink the ball so hard.

Speaker 1 I wonder, is it in the illustrated guide? What happens if a vampire gets struck by lightning? I don't think it's in the illustrated. I didn't see it in the illustrated guide.
Update it. Update it.

Speaker 1 At one point, Rosalie, when Emmett climbs up a tree to get a ball, he says, my monkey man. And I said, oh, family's got a big thing for me.
So, what's going on here?

Speaker 1 Spider holding tight, spider monkey, my monkey man.

Speaker 1 The way Nikki Reed delivers her lines as Rosalie, I think she's pretty, she's really good in the first movie.

Speaker 1 Because when she says that, that is the gnarliest line to have to deliver, but I believed it coming out of her mouth. Yeah.
When she said it, I was like, Yeah, Rosalie did say that.

Speaker 1 Her and Emmett have a very cute relationship, they are like obsessed with each other, yeah.

Speaker 1 But then she does say at one point, I don't know if it's in the movies or if it's in the books, uh, that she would give every, that she would give him up to like

Speaker 1 be human again, I think. Oh, yeah, because so now to Rosalie, back to the illustrated guide when they go back to her backstory, Rosalie's one dream in life was to get married and have a child.
Right.

Speaker 1 That's all she wanted to do. And like grow old with this person and have a normal life.
And so like she was robbed of all that because she can't have a child. And

Speaker 1 which also doesn't make any sense because you think about how Bella gets pregnant. Holes poke in the lore all over the place.

Speaker 1 But I guess when when Emmett was turned, it was because he was mauled by a bear. Oh, fuck.
I didn't even know that.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And

Speaker 1 Rosalie finds him and thinks he's like so beautiful and loves him.

Speaker 1 But it's said in the Illustrated Guide that when Rosalie was human, she was jealous of only one person and it was her best friend. uh Vera, I believe her name was.

Speaker 1 And it's because Vera was married, had a husband who loved her and a little boy named Henry. Okay.
And that was what she wanted.

Speaker 1 And And so things are about to get so weird. They're going to get so weird because they always do.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 She said that his face reminded her of like Henry. I fucking knew you were going to say it.
Of like a child. I fucking knew you were going to say it.
And so she was in love with him. I hate it.

Speaker 1 And then Carlisle was like, seems like a good enough reason.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 I'm telling you, you take a peek through that illustrated guide and it will change your life.

Speaker 1 I think you just changed my life in that that moment, not for the better.

Speaker 1 Your goddamn life. We have been changed.

Speaker 1 For bad, we're changed for good. For bad.
For bad.

Speaker 1 I've not been changed for good. But they do love each other.
Yeah, they do. So there's that.
I also love in the baseball scene when Emmett and Edward like collide. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And they like roll around and giggle. And if you look closely,

Speaker 1 Edward flips off. Oh, does he? Emmett.
He also does that like snap thing like, oh, man. Yeah.
But yeah, that's when we meet like Laurent and Victoria. Victoria.

Speaker 1 What a fucking disservice. Yeah, we got a humanity.
Victoria

Speaker 1 played by, excuse me, Rochelle Lefrevre, I believe it's pronounced. I have my French guy on pronounce names tell me.

Speaker 1 Le Frevre.

Speaker 1 Rochelle.

Speaker 1 Listen. Nothing against Bryce Dallas Howard.
No, I love Bryce Della. She's great.
She's great. She's not Victoria.
She's not Victoria.

Speaker 1 Rochelle killed it as Victoria. First two movies, especially in New Moon, because she like, and you know, we're going to cover that.
She's back with vengeance.

Speaker 1 She is just that scene in New Moon where she's jumping through the trees as they're like doing the search party or like the investigation.

Speaker 1 I think that was another sexual awakening for me.

Speaker 1 Like she's amazing. She's so good.
And then Bryce Dallas Howard is such a great actress. Like I'm not saying anything against her in that way.
She doesn't have the energy that the first Victoria had.

Speaker 1 that like villainess, like something about lioness. That's what it is.
It's like a predator. Yeah.
Like she had that predatory like.

Speaker 1 And I don't, it just, she killed it. Like I thought she was so fucking good.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 this is when we kind of meet them all. And this is after they've killed Whaylan.
Yeah. And she's wearing Whaylan's shirt.
Oh, fuck. I didn't even catch that.
Good call.

Speaker 1 Whaylan's wearing like some like, it had a shamrock on it and she's wearing it. That's how I get it in that scene.
I'm obsessed.

Speaker 1 even cooler. And she's got that big fucking fur jacket.
Yep. I love it.
She just looks so fucking cool and her hair is awesome. They all look cool.

Speaker 1 And she's really good at that like animalistic look that she gives. Like she just like you said, like predatory.
She's really predatory.

Speaker 1 But they, of course, James ends up smelling Bella. Because also they put her hair down.
And he, Edward makes her put her hair down.

Speaker 1 It was up in a ponytail and she could have just like stuffed it into her jacket. I don't know if it was masking like her neck and stuff, like masking

Speaker 1 arteries. And it was just because the wind blew that it kind of like wafted over to him.
Yeah, it just seemed like a bad plan all around.

Speaker 1 But now he's tracking her and he's not going to stop until he gets her. He's like obsessed with that.
He's obsessed. This is just what he does.
He's a tracker.

Speaker 1 So they have to get her out of there really fast and they're like, you have to tell Charlie something because you have to leave your house because he's not safe. And Bella says, I can't hurt him.

Speaker 1 Yeah, literally says, I can't hurt him. And she looks at Edward and says, what do I tell him? I can't hurt him.
And Edward's like, just shrugs and walks away. I was like, Thank you for the help.

Speaker 1 He likes jumps out the window. And so she basically goes with, I hate him, I'm breaking up with him.
I'm leaving the state.

Speaker 1 And Charlie's like, no, you're not leaving the state because you broke up with your boyfriend. And he says, he's like, did he hurt you? Yeah.
And he's like, no. And she's like, I hate him.
He sucks.

Speaker 1 And he's like, okay, let's just sleep on it. He's like, fuck, like, this is teenage girl shit.
Yeah. And he even says, sleep on it.
And if you still feel the same way, I'll bring you to the airport.

Speaker 1 Like, that's, let's just talk about it tomorrow. And then she ends up using, like, she's literally like, what? So we can just sit around at the diner every day and like do this and like

Speaker 1 facebook on the flat screen. And I'll just be stuck here like mom was.
And then like leaves. She is so nasty to him after saying I can't hurt him.

Speaker 1 She said, I thought you weren't going to hurt that person. She eviscerates him.

Speaker 1 Slits his face. And he's just standing at the doorway completely dejected.
It's like the worst. Yeah.
And she, and she ends up saying that she said to him what her mom said when she left him. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Which I was like. That's so fucked up, Bella.
Yeah, it's like, you're not a good person.

Speaker 1 She's really bad.

Speaker 1 On a much smaller scale, she's also like, I'll pull over and like stop at a motel if I'm tired. I'm like, you can't stop at a motel.
You're online. You're 19 years old.

Speaker 1 Like, you can't just travel to a house. Get a hotel room.
Like, hello? What are you talking about? It doesn't make any sense.

Speaker 1 And the fact that Charlie just like lets her go eventually, because obviously he's like, you know, frozen because she hurt him so bad. But I'm like, you got to get in your car, Charlie.

Speaker 1 And like, yeah, like, you got to do something. I mean, I guess we don't know what he did after she left.
It's true, because like they kind of speed off, but

Speaker 1 also when she's going going in her room during this scene to like pack her shit, Edward is just creeping by the door. Yeah.
Like just right there. Like not even behind the door,

Speaker 1 like next to the hinge. But while they're driving away, there's this big bang on the car and they're like, what was that? And he's like, it's just Emmett.

Speaker 1 For some reason, that made me laugh so hard because he's like, it's just Emmett. I would be so fucking angry at that moment.
I would fucking kill him. I'm being hunted by a like

Speaker 1 deviant vampire who wants to rip open my arteries and you allow your buffoon brother to just

Speaker 1 onto the back of this truck. Any minor inconvenience that happens to me or anything like that, I'm just going to say it's just Emmett.

Speaker 1 It's just Emmett. It's just Emmett.
Don't worry about it. Anytime if my kids are like, I think there's a monster out there, like, it's just Emmett.
They're like, don't worry. Like, don't worry.

Speaker 1 It's just Emmett.

Speaker 1 They end up going to therapy later being like, and then she told me about this man named Emmett outside my room. We still don't know who we don't know who Emmett is.
We watch Twilight.

Speaker 1 We're not sure if it's Kellen Lutz.

Speaker 1 Why is it Kellen Lutz?

Speaker 1 Why was Kellen Lutt's outside my bed? To this day, I can't drive an open bed truck. So it ends up that they have to get away.

Speaker 1 And, you know, James lures her to her old ballet studio. With like an old phone

Speaker 1 or like an old home video of her mom being like, Bella, Bella, where are you? Like, couldn't find her.

Speaker 1 Because he tells her he's going to kill her mom if she doesn't show up. So of course she shows up.
She gets the shit kicked out of her. And

Speaker 1 she should have died because when he throws her, he cracks her. She cracks her head on that corner.
Yeah, he literally yeets her into the corner of like a banister and there's blood.

Speaker 1 I'm like, you just, your skull is sticking into your brain right now. Edward can't handle it.
Alice can't handle it. Carlisle.
Because like she gets bit by James before she gets bit.

Speaker 1 And when they show up, Emmett, Alice, and Jasper show up as like a trio and they just slowly,

Speaker 1 slowly fall down. And it's like the Spy Kids movie, the way they descend to the floor.
They're just like, whoopoosh.

Speaker 1 like they just end up but they can't none of them can handle the blood especially like you know especially not confederate

Speaker 1 he's all upset like i want to eat her alive but if james has bit her yeah so now the venom is gonna start turning her if he if carlisle doesn't

Speaker 1 if edward doesn't do something drink suck out the venom yeah suck out the venom i think that's what it is and when she when he does

Speaker 1 Bella's eyes go cross-eyed like several times and it is one of the funniest things I have.

Speaker 1 She's just like, she's dying. She's dying.
That was actually the funniest way. Hold on.

Speaker 1 I gotta film that. I'm filming it for you guys.
That's perfect. And go.

Speaker 1 That was perfect. That's what she does.
It's a perfect presentation. And oh, and he broke her leg too.
So like he like crunches. Oh, you were also very angry.
Rightfully so. Oh, yeah.
Cause Carlisle.

Speaker 1 Also, Carlisle's like her femoral artery is severed. She's only got a few minutes.
And that was after she's been lying there for a couple of minutes. One, not enough blood.
She would have been dead.

Speaker 1 Femoral artery, you have like two to five.

Speaker 1 Five minutes is like you have a guardian. You might be a superhero.
Like, that's just like part, you're bleeding out. Like, it's gone.
And this takes a long time.

Speaker 1 When he says it's severed, that would have been like, like, that would have been blood everywhere. It would have been like, shouldn't have happened in the ketchup bottle.

Speaker 1 Like, I was like, you didn't have to go there. They also take so fucking long discussing this.
And And I'm like, hey, hey, hey, her femoral arteries are dying right now. But they do save her.

Speaker 1 And she wakes up in the hospital. And, you know, like, Edward's been there.
And her oxygen mask is literally upon her eyebrows. It's just in her eyebrows.
Like, it's just crazy. It's a lot.

Speaker 1 And when her mom leaves and Edward just walks up to her and it's like, Bella, you need to go to Jacksonville, Florida. You need to go with your mom.
And like before that even.

Speaker 1 Because we talked about how shitty her mom is. Oh, yeah.
She wakes up in the hospital, Bella, and she says, what happened? And her mom is like, oh my God.

Speaker 1 Oh my God, you were at the the Cullens house, and you're so clumsy, you crazy bitch. You tripped and you fell down two flights of stairs and through a fucking

Speaker 1 window. Through a window, and we don't know what the bite on your wrist is all about.
No, but I'm sure it wasn't your boyfriend who you're trying to leave the state about.

Speaker 1 None of us are questioning domestic violence. You're just a clumsy gal.
None of us guys, like no one's got it. Charlie, you're a fucking police officer.
Excuse me again. The police officer.

Speaker 1 She has a bite scar on her fucking wrist. Like, and she was literally in this massive fight about to leave the state.
And you just believe that she tripped and fell through a fucking window.

Speaker 1 Fell through a window. I don't know, guys.
I don't know about that. I think you shouldn't have had a child.
I don't think so. I think you're really big bad at this.
I don't think they're great at it.

Speaker 1 But now Jacksonville. But yeah, that's when Edward's like, you should just go to Jacksonville.
Like, we shouldn't do this anymore. Like, breaking up with her while she's on oxygen.

Speaker 1 Because he's like, I can't endanger you anymore.

Speaker 1 And she flips the fuck out yeah she codes and she's like we can't be apart we can't be you can't leave me you can't leave me we can't be apart you can't ever be away from me and i was like this is the most toxic shit i've ever seen in my life she literally says you can't stay you can't say stuff like that to me ever and then he said and she's like so you're not gonna go like you're not gonna leave me he says where else am i gonna go

Speaker 1 and i said stephanie I don't think that was the line that you thought it was because if somebody said that to me, I'd be like, so it's lack of options that's you know how people people say there's like peaks of romance this is like the doldrums of romance quite a valley i would say this is that's hell that is hell that's hell is your beautiful man looking at you and saying where else am i gonna go i don't have any other options so i'm here

Speaker 1 damn that'd be a humbling moment but it's not for bella because they go to prom together and she's wearing leggings or her standards in a cardigan over her dress not even just like a cute cardigan either like a grandma cardigan it's it's yeah it's just awful but what's fun is you it's like monte carlo themed yeah and when you get there there's like a big roulette wheel or like a big wheel and standing next to the wheel if you look back on it is victoria yup in a prom dress with an updo she's like hey and you can just just see her in the background you don't notice it until later yep um but it's this is when they dance and the gazebo but before that jacob shows up at prom oh i forgot that he shows up jacob shows up at prom in the most diabolical outfit and he's just wearing like his best his sundays best

Speaker 1 his like untucked white shirt and like two shorts just a floppy tie tie exactly and he is essentially there because he's like hey my dad really wants you to break up with your boyfriend and he paid me 20 bucks to come and tell you that here i am and she's like at your prom yeah and he's like all right Bye.

Speaker 1 See you later. Like, that was it.
Like, okay. She's like, all right.

Speaker 1 And so they dance in a gazebo and she's like, I really want you to turn me because, you know, like, you're going to stay this way forever and I'm going to get old and die.

Speaker 1 And he's like, I don't know about that. And then he's like, you want me to do it? You want me to do it right now?

Speaker 1 And he starts, she like leans back her neck and it looks like he's about to do it. But you're like, he's not going to do it at your prom.
That's the thing. This got me literally

Speaker 1 not showing people who they are. You can't drink at prom and you also can't turn into a vampire.
You also know what happens when venom enters your body.

Speaker 1 You're going to convulse on the floor for three days. Like it's not going to be pretty.
She was ready. So he doesn't.
And he's like, maybe we'll talk about it later. And she's like, fine.

Speaker 1 And then the last thing we see

Speaker 1 is somebody watching out the window and she turns around and it's fucking Victoria and she takes the pin that's holding her shiny

Speaker 1 and she's got tears rolling down her face because remember her mate was James yeah and to back up a mate for life forgot to tell you that when when James bit Bella they rip James to pieces.

Speaker 1 Oh they literally rip his head off and burn his body because that's the only way you can kill a vampire. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And you see it like it's actually awesome because Alice literally hops up on him and just twists his head off, like, pop! Yeah, like a Barbie doll.

Speaker 1 Pretty amazing while, like, Jasper and Emmett are holding his arms. Like, it's gnarly.
That poor dance studio. But that, I hope she had a chance.
I know you're not going to really come back from that.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 But that's her mate. So, like, she's, and she has the tears running down her face, and her face looks like you.
I remember seeing this and being like, oh, fuck. I said, oh, we're getting a sequel.

Speaker 1 And she just walks away. It's a great ending.
It's so good. I think it's such a a fun, campy, fucking weird-ass movie.
It's the rindomest movie of all

Speaker 1 weird. And I love it.
How you liking the rain, girl? How you liking the rain, girl? Next time it rains, I'm going to come in here and scream at everyone.

Speaker 1 This is the skin of a killer, Bella. Like, you can't.
And then

Speaker 1 this is not even talking about new moon. I can't.
We touched on it a couple times. Barely.
I can't wait. New moon.
Let us talk about new moon, everybody. New moon is reckless.
Please allow us. It is.

Speaker 1 It's so reckless. You loved this.
And if you didn't, you loved it. If you didn't, you did.
You love this. I said it.

Speaker 1 It's so much fun, though. I love it.
I think it's so much fun. I hope you guys enjoyed this really big deep dive that we thought was going to be like 30 minutes and ended up being like four days.

Speaker 1 It's great. How long is it, Mikey? Like two hours.
Two hours on the nerve dive. Oh my God.
I'm obsessed. All right.
Well, we have to end this here because Mikey has to edit it. So we love you guys.

Speaker 1 We hope you keep listening. and we hope you keep it Twilight

Speaker 1 bye.

Speaker 1 The skin of a killer weirdos. Hello.

Speaker 1 Hello.

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