388: Finnish folklore: Uh oh, Better Get Mikko!

This week on Myths and Legends, it's the story of mighty Miko from Finnish folklore.

You'll see that the first step to making a new friend is not killing them, and that talking foxes make great wingmen.

Well, wing foxes, because they're foxes.

The creature this time is a monster from Armenia who has a special gift just for you if you come to its mountain lair alone.

This is Myths and Legends, episode 388.

Uh-oh, better get Miko.

This is a podcast where we tell stories from mythology and folklore.

Some are incredibly popular tales you might think you know, but with surprising origins, and others are stories that might be new to you, but are definitely worth a listen.

This week, we're in Finnish folklore, telling the story of mighty Miko.

Not too much backstory here, it's a fairy tale, so a story largely not anchored in history with fantastical elements.

Also, tropey elements, because Miko, the teen son of a woodcutter, is about to go through an all-too-common fairy tale occurrence.

Son, I know the future seems scary, the father said, before his body shook with coughs.

Oh,

a lot more blood this time, yikes.

He sighed.

Son, I know the future seems scary, but you will not be alone.

Miko didn't believe his dad.

He was the son of a wood-cutting couple.

Their job meant that they lived far off into the forest, so they could have access to the one thing they needed to get every day.

Wood.

He was an only child of only children.

He had no one else.

And after losing his mother the year before to the same illness that was about to take his father, he would be truly and utterly alone.

Not only would he have to bury his father, but he would have to live in this house, the dark, empty house far off in the forest, knowing how alone he was.

Now his dad was trying to tell him that the one thing he knew would be true was false.

He would let the old man have his lie, though.

Maybe it would make his own passing easier.

But the father continued.

It was true he had nothing to leave his son except the house, but there was something that Miko didn't know about.

He had snares out in the forest.

Miko nodded.

Okay.

Those snares now belong to you, son.

When I am dead, go into the woods, and if you find a wild creature caught in any of them, free it and bring it home alive.

Miko forced a smile.

Okay,

dad.

Maybe maybe time for bed.

Leaning back, the dad pointed a finger toward the ceiling.

Remember, the snares.

Miko forgot the snares.

He had a lot on his mind.

What was trying to make a living cutting wood as a teenager?

It's not that he wanted to, but this was all he knew.

Sons of woodcutters didn't get apprenticeships.

Children of woodcutters became woodcutters who made more children of woodcutters.

A few days after his dad died, he did hear a crying from the woods and remembered.

Well, at least he would go let whatever was caught go so it didn't die out there.

He saw the little fox caught in the trap.

Miko bent down and, though the animal shirked away and Miko was certain he was about to get an armful of fox teeth, he gripped the snare, pulled back the trap, and let the fox go.

The animal limped, though.

After Miko gathered the traps he had no use for them, no interest in catching and killing animals in the woods, he saw the fox still hadn't made much progress out of the clearing.

He stepped up to the animal, and, though it spread out its paws and lowered its back, Miko held out his hand for it to smell.

With a few pets, the fox let him pick it up.

Miko hadn't intended on following his father's last request so closely, but here they were: a warm bundle of fox nestling into the crook of his arm.

A bowl of milk later, and the animal seemed to be doing better.

There didn't appear to be any damage to its paws.

Miko opened the window for the fox to leave if it wanted, but when he laid down in bed, he felt that same warm bundle curl up at his feet.

Miko smiled for the first time since the death of his parents and went to sleep.

Why are you so sad?

Miko heard one day over breakfast.

He looked down to the fox, looking up from his porridge.

What?

Why are you so sad?

Sorry, I thought I was speaking loud enough, the fox asked again.

No, I heard you just fine.

That's kind of the problem.

You can talk?

The young man blurted.

Yeah, but let's stay on you.

You seem so sad.

Why?

You have a house.

You can provide for yourself.

You're free of predators.

I thought we were having a fun time together.

Still, though, something's wrong.

The fox sighed.

No, no, no, don't change the subject.

You can talk.

It's weird that you can talk, Miko pointed to the fox.

Why?

You can talk, the fox shrugged before getting a few more bites of porridge in.

Yeah, but I'm a person, Miko said, and I'm a fox.

That's a wall, that's a chair, this is a bowl, as long as we're naming things.

Well what's your point?

the fox said.

You're a fox.

Foxes don't talk.

And have you ever asked a fox if it can talk?

the fox sneered.

I've never asked anything if it can talk, Miko said.

That was ridiculous.

The fox laughed.

Well, there was his problem.

He was too focused on what he couldn't do.

Like, he was sad.

Because I'm lonely, Miko sighed.

And why are you lonely?

You're an awesome young man.

You should get married.

Then you wouldn't be lonely any more.

The fox said, There, problem solved.

Okay, and who would marry me?

Miko gestured to the surrounding shack.

I can't marry a poor girl because I'm poor myself.

Okay,

then marry a rich girl.

The fox shrugged before taking another bite.

That got an even bigger laugh.

A rich girl.

Nice.

You're a fine young man.

You're hardworking, you're kind, you're gentle.

A princess will be lucky to marry you, the fox said.

What?

I mean it.

Like, take our princess right now, the daughter of our sovereign.

What do you think of her?

I mean, I saw her once when I went with dad to the city.

She's beautiful, she's kind herself.

Any man would be happy to marry her, Miko said.

Done, the fox replied, and went back to finishing his breakfast.

Miko laughed again.

Done?

What does that mean?

It means you're getting married to the princess.

I'll arrange your wedding.

You're welcome, the fox said, and didn't seem to betray any hint that he was joking or lying.

He was completely serious.

He licked the last few oats from the bowl.

nodded at Miko, and trotted out the door.

Miko admitted that he really needed to get out of the house more after that conversation with a fox.

My master has a request for you, Your Majesty.

The fox bowed low before the throne.

The king rolled his eyes before laughing.

Okay, here it comes.

No,

whoever this talking fox's master was could not marry his daughter.

He shook his head.

Always with the suitors around here.

My goodness.

Oh, he doesn't want to marry your daughter, the fox said.

Are we are we not going to talk about how there's a talking fox in here?

One guard whispered to the other, with the other snapping back that some foxes talked.

Get over it.

He didn't want to get caught whispering again.

They get to tension.

I'm sorry, the incredulous king interlaced his fingers and sat back.

He knew that the fox was just changing course because the king said something.

Everybody wanted to marry his daughter.

If the fox truly wasn't going to ask that, what was he going to ask?

For a bushel measure?

The fox grinned.

Oh.

Then the king glowered.

Who wanted his bushel measure?

The fox

looked around with an awkward chuckle.

He

was the talking fox.

The king didn't know his master?

Everybody knew his master.

The fox slid past the guards and leapt up the side table to whisper in the king's ear.

The king laughed.

Oh

Mighty Miko, of course

The king didn't know the messenger was that talking fox.

The one who represented Mighty Miko, yes

The fox was very glad the king definitely recognized him and wasn't just pretending to in order to save face and play directly into the fox's paw.

Well, my master is about to leave on a long trip and needs a bushel measure for a very particular reason, Wink, the fox said.

The king laughed.

Oh,

he understood.

He didn't, but he still loaned out his bushel measure, which is just like a big wooden container.

It looks like half a barrel.

The fox dragged it from the orchard and left it in the woods.

All right.

Next objective, theft.

Because when it came to wooing a princess, the secret ingredient, as they say, is crime.

The fox was good at this.

In all sorts of cracks and crannies, under the floorboards people used to hide what little savings they had from even their own families, everywhere.

He searched the medieval Finnish versions of couch cushions for the medieval Finnish versions of quarters, and bringing them back to the bushel measure in the woods, the fox found he had a few handfuls.

That would do.

we'll see what the fox wants with all that cash, but that will be right after this.

This show is sponsored by BetterHelp.

Chrisa, do you remember the early episodes of this podcast?

Before you joined, and the audio and writing quality got a massive glow-up, as the youths say.

Do they really say that?

I think.

I don't know.

I read it somewhere.

I do remember that time.

How I used to sit in the back of our tiny apartment and insist that you not listen to me record.

I always kept thinking to myself, you do realize you're putting this out there for the world to hear.

That's the thing, exactly.

I was so self-conscious back then about performing on the show.

You can hear it in those old episodes like this week on Myths and Legends.

If I had just been myself, they would be so much better.

Literally millions of people have heard some of those episodes now.

Masks are for Halloween, not for who we are.

No, yeah, totally.

We've talked about how awesome we think therapy is and how much it's helped both of us in our lives.

If you're thinking about therapy, therapy, really consider BetterHelp.

It's all online, so it's flexible for your schedule.

You're not limited by geography or specialty, and they'll help match you with a therapist after a brief questionnaire.

And you can switch therapists for no additional charge.

Take off the mask with BetterHelp.

Visit betterhelp.com/slash myths today to get 10% off your first month.

That's betterhelp, h-e-l-p.com/slash/myths.

So, what do this animal

and this animal

and this animal

have in common?

They all live on an organic valley farm.

Organic valley dairy comes from small organic family farms that protect the land and the plants and animals that live on it from toxic pesticides, which leads to a thriving ecosystem and delicious, nutritious milk and cheese.

Learn more at OV.coop and taste the difference.

Don't miss a special offer on November 19th from Botox Cosmetic, Onobotulinum Toxin A, the one and only product of its kind FDA approved for over 20 years.

Buy one $50 gift card and get one free.

While supplies last, terms and conditions apply.

For prescribing information and boxed warning, visit Botoxcosmetic.com or call 877-351-0300.

Oh, you could have just brought it back to the orchard, the king said, looking on the bushel measure.

He actually didn't even know what that thing was.

He had to look it up.

The fox said, still,

King Mighty Miko was so grateful that he wanted his servant to convey his thanks in person.

Well, no problem, what?

The king stopped talking and looked at the bushel measure.

Um, he squinted, hey, there was there was gold in this thing?

Oh yeah, it's wedged in there pretty well between the planks, the fox shrugged.

They couldn't get those out, and a few dozen gold pieces were nothing to the mighty Miko.

Less than nothing if he had to lose his valuable time prying them loose from a barrel.

The king could have them.

The king was stunned.

This man, this mighty Miko, was so careless with his wealth, which meant that he was super worthy of respect and admiration.

I have to meet this master of yours, the king held his breath as he waited for the fox's response.

But the fox

smiled awkwardly.

Yeah, so about that.

First, thank you, the fox said.

But the king could sense that this wasn't a thank you.

Now I'll do what you said immediately, like he was used to.

The fox sighed.

Mighty Miko was about to head off on a trip, so

awesome.

This can be his first stop, the king clapped.

It was a trip to, quote, inspect a number of foreign princesses.

And yeah, that's certainly a choice when it comes to phrasing, but we'll move on.

My daughter.

Oh my gosh, you should come inspect my daughter first, the king laughed.

If he saw the princess, his girl, he wouldn't want to make the trip.

The mighty Miko would be in love.

The fox.

The fox cringed.

You're gonna make me say it, aren't you?

The fox looked left and right.

Say what?

The king asked.

The fox took a deep breath.

Okay,

look,

first things first,

this was gonna sound mean, but he only wanted to make sure there were no misunderstandings moving forward.

The king, ugh,

the king wasn't rich enough to entertain the mighty Miko.

He's so sorry.

You don't know how rich I am.

I had an orange once.

Do you know how hard a fresh orange is to get in medieval Finland?

The king arched his eyebrows.

The fox held up his paws.

Okay, okay, fair enough.

He hadn't seen the king's treasure stores.

But, well,

he had seen the palace.

What's wrong with my palace?

The king screeched.

It's not big enough, the fox shrugged.

Look, the mighty Miko traveled with a massive retinue.

Special considerations had to be made for each stop.

And well,

he's gonna be real.

This castle wasn't Miko worthy.

Please, talking fox, I will give you anything.

This is a bribe.

I am bribing you with whatever is valuable to a talking fox.

I have no context for that.

You need to fill me in.

Is it like birds?

Rodents?

But fox, please.

I have to meet Miko, the king pleaded.

Okay, look, I do have some pull, the fox said.

If the mighty Miko arrived with a smaller retinue than normal,

people might not think that things are going so great for Eminem.

But if he arrived incognito, then no one has to know.

Sometimes, if he wanted to travel without also planning a parade, he would do so in the form of an impoverished woodcutter.

The king thought about it.

Okay, yeah, no, that made a lot of sense.

Yes, great.

Wow.

The mighty Miko would come to visit him.

Oh my gosh.

Wonderful.

Just wonderful.

The king circled Miko.

It's just, wow, the attention to detail alone.

If I hadn't been negotiating with King Miko's talking fox, I would have totally believed you were just

a wretched, poor, smelly, wretched woodcutter.

From one craftsman to another, game-recognized game.

Oh, you're an artist yourself?

Miko asked.

barely able to hide his smile despite the king saying wretched twice when this was how Miko looked normally.

Well, like commission work, the king said, same thing basically.

Kind of more difficult crafting the right prompts to do art than just scribbling some lines down on a paper.

He waved Miko down to the wardrobe.

Let's get him out of that wretched, shabby, wretched costume.

The king ushered Miko into the biggest, most extravagant room he had ever seen.

The king waved his arms.

This was his closet.

The fox stepped in between Miko and the king.

Um, he was sorry.

They

talked about this?

The king looked around.

Talked about what?

The nice clothes?

Yeah, the fox pointed his snout this way and that.

The nice clothes.

Where are they?

The king said, all around.

I'm sorry, is this...

Are we joking now?

Is this a big fun prank you're playing on my master?

Do you know how many trips, the sheer number of beautiful princess inspections he had to cancel to be here today?

And you bring him to this this trash?

The king said he was so sorry.

No one in the kingdom had anything like this.

He waved in the tailor.

Was there anything?

Anything else?

The tailor did have some pieces that were near completion.

They were awesome, actually.

They were super expensive because the patterns were just so complicated.

Hold it up for us, the fox demanded, and the king complied.

complied.

The fox looked on the outfit.

He turned, apologizing profusely to Mighty Miko, who was trying the whole time to not break out laughing.

Yes, yes, this would do.

I will say this about my master, the mighty Miko, the fox said, while Miko changed.

He is not a proud man.

Nothing says attraction like your date wearing your dad's clothes, but the princess was, according to the story, so taken with Miko that she began shaking.

The court loved that Miko wasn't a complete monster jerk like most of the royalty they were forced to deal with.

Their eyes widened as they looked at the king.

The present company excluded, of course, and the princess's ladies went into, quote, ecstasies over his gorgeousness and modest manners.

The advisors liked that he actually listened to them despite his great wealth.

Seeing as the bar for human decency on the king's court court was basically rolling around on the floor, Miko cleared it.

He was an absolute hit.

Your daughter pleases Miko mightily, the fox said to the king, who was more than happy to hear it.

In fact, the fox had so twisted the situation that Miko wouldn't be asking the king for his daughter's hand in marriage, but instead the fox left the king waiting for his decision.

The fox had so altered reality that the king immediately planned the wedding for the following day, when Miko said graciously

Yes,

he would marry the princess

I can't believe you did it Miko said to the fox in private the day after the wedding if his parents could see him now married to a princess he'd come so far from their little shack in the woods

Then he he blinked.

Wait, no

M he hadn't come that far from the shack in the woods.

Miko still actually lived in the shack in the woods.

Oh no.

He lived in a shack in the woods.

He just married a princess.

What were they what were they going to do?

You can chill out, the fox said.

He was getting stressed out just listening to Miko carrying on like that.

And he, the fox, had thought of everything.

Everything?

Miko asked.

Everything, the fox replied.

Now, at dinner tonight, Miko should address his father-in-law, the king, and tell him that it was only fitting that he should come visit mighty Miko at his castle, the one over which his daughter was to be mistress.

But I don't own a castle, Miko noted.

Wait, you don't?

the fox asked, and then pursed his fox lips if that's even possible.

I know.

I lived at your house for a while.

Just say the thing.

I'll run ahead and get things ready for you.

At the end of the week, Miko was to lead the king and his courtiers along the main highway and just keep going straight until he saw a castle.

It'll take a while, but if he meets any men on the way, like shepherds and stuff, ask them whose men they are.

And this is really important, show no surprise at their answer.

The fox smiled, which I thought would be kind of scary, like he's a wild animal showing his teeth and all, but I looked it up and it's actually adorable.

He said farewell, and he looked forward to seeing his friend, King Mighty Miko, in Miko's beautiful castle.

We'll see how Miko gets a castle, but that will, once again, be right after this.

Not all group chats are the same, just like not all Adams are the same.

Adam Brody, for example, uses WhatsApp to plan his grandma's birthday using video calls, polls to choose a gift, and HD photos to document a family moment to remember, all in one group chat.

Makes grandma's birthday her best one yet.

But Adam Scott group messages with an app that isn't WhatsApp.

And so, the photo invite came through so blurry, he never even knew about the party.

And grandma still won't talk to me.

It's time for WhatsApp.

Message privately with everyone.

Today, we're exploring deep in the North American wilderness among nature's wildest plants, animals, and

cows.

Uh, you're actually on an Organic Valley dairy farm where nutritious, delicious organic food gets its start.

But there's so much nature.

Exactly.

Organic Valley's small family farms protect the land and the plants and animals that call it home.

Extraordinary.

Sure is.

Organic Valley, protecting where your food comes from.

Learn more about their delicious dairy at ov.coop.

We know no one's journey is the same.

That's why Delta Sky Miles lets you do it your way.

From earning miles on reloads for coffee runs, shopping, and things you do every day, to connecting you to new places and experiences.

A Sky Miles membership fits into your lifestyle, letting you do more of what makes you, you.

It's more than travel.

It's the membership that flies, dines, streams, rides, and arrives with you.

Every great journey deserves a great story.

And when you have a membership that's as unique as you are, there's no telling how your story will unfold.

or where that journey will take you next.

Sky Miles is the membership that will be here for all your big and small moments.

The membership that's there for every solo adventure or family trip.

The membership that comes with the power of partnership from brands you love.

The membership that moves with you.

Learn more at delta.com slash skymiles.

At the UPS store, we have the key to unlock the world of possibilities because we'll sign for your packages and protect them from porch pirates.

Most locations are independently owned.

Product services, pricing, and hours of operation may vary.

See Center for Details.

The UPS store, store.

Be unstoppable.

Come into your local store today.

Hey there, woodcutters, the fox said to the woodcutters.

Hi yourself, talking fox, the woodcutters replied.

As this was, I suppose, a fairly common occurrence that didn't even warrant discussion.

Um,

quick question, the fox said to the woodcutters before they got back to woodcutting, because they're woodcutters.

Whose men are you?

Looking at each other, the woodcutters chuckled, well, they were the worm's men.

Oh, I

am so sorry, the fox winced.

The woodcutters asked why the little fox said that.

The worm was a giant dragon, and they were on his good side.

So I hope he comes to save your lives then.

The fox turned with a smile and took a few more steps before the woodcutters, okay, they needed to know what was up with that statement.

Oh, just that you're all gonna die.

But you've seen your king before, right?

And he'll definitely come to your aid in the next three to four days.

So you're good.

I'm just gonna keep on running as fast as I can, though.

I'm not as brave or as well looked after as you are.

The fox took a few more steps, before the woodcutters stopped him again.

Um, okay, what's going on?

The fox said if they really must know, the king was coming with a massive force to destroy the worm and all of his people.

All of his people, but

we are his people, the woodcutters looked to each other.

Bummer.

Yeah, the fox said he would love to stick around, but he didn't want to get caught up in all that, so he was going to run for his life.

Fox, fox, is there any way for us to escape?

The woodcutters pleaded.

The fox sighed and slowed.

Um, well, they could be the mighty Miko's men.

Uh okay.

What's a mighty Miko?

That sounds like a cross between a fast food meal and a body shop.

Okay, well, I don't know what those words mean, the fox said.

But yeah, if they hadn't seen the worm, or the worm wouldn't be by in time enough to save them, why did they owe him their loyalty?

They supposed they didn't.

Okay, so they were the mighty Miko's men now.

And that would keep them from being murdered?

Oh, totally, the fox fox said.

But they had to tell everyone that passed by that they were the mighty Miko's men.

And if they valued their lives, they could never again say that their master was the worm.

We are mighty Miko's men.

The woodcutter smiled and began chanting.

We are mighty Miko's men.

Okay, I mean, that's cool.

Just maybe keep it to when people pass by, you know.

wouldn't want it to look suspicious or not genuine.

They couldn't hear him over the shouting, their own shouting, and so he continued on, figuring that it was better that they're overzealous than undercommitted.

Hi, 20 grooms, the fox said to the men taking care of the horses in a massive stable he was walking by.

You're gonna die, he cut directly to the chase.

Oh, I mean, this is the medieval world and we're well acquainted with the ever-present specter of our own mortality, the closest groom said.

Adding that everyone dies.

This is not something to fear, but rather expect and prepare for.

He got back to brushing his horse.

This week, though?

Like in the next few days?

The fox clarified.

The groom took a deep breath and then looked at his arms.

Hmm.

This week?

He didn't have a slight cough and didn't remember getting any small cuts.

Well, a massive army is coming your way to exterminate the worm and his people, and if you're part of his people, you'll be exterminated too, the fox barked.

Oh, well, why didn't you say so?

Who's coming to kill us?

He asked.

The fox said it was Mighty Miko.

Oh, well, we're mighty Miko's men now.

He yelled out for the others.

They were all mighty Miko's men now.

Just like that?

The fox asked.

I thought you were okay with, quote, the ever-present specter of your own mortality.

But just because I've accepted that I'm going going to die doesn't mean I'm going to hasten it.

And also, who do I care who the king is?

I'm a peasant.

I'll side with whoever won't kill me right now.

Now, if you please, I have a lot of horse brushing or whatever it is a groom does to get back to.

Feeding?

Turning out?

Mucking stalls?

Tacking and untacking?

The fox said after the briefest of googles.

But they were already getting back to all those things and more.

Hey, you're the mighty Miko's men now, the fox said to the 30 shepherds in blue smocks, looking after a thousand sheep on one of the hillsides.

The men looked at each other, then back to the fox.

Yeah, okay.

Chant it though, like when he comes by, the fox said.

Yeah,

we got it, the shepherds replied.

This isn't the first time we've been conquered.

We are in the service of a dragon called the worm.

I okay, I just want to make sure you're all okay.

The mighty Miko is killing the worm and exterminating all of his people, the fox said.

Oh, oh guys, the fox, the talking fox that's in the service of the guy who's basically committing genocide on the civilian population of his enemies, he wants to make sure we're okay,

the shepherd yelled out to laughs.

Oh my gosh, all right, the fox said, and began bounding off toward the castle on the hill in the distance.

Yeah, that's right.

You run off, fox.

Run off and hunt very small animals and scavenge, the shepherd said, and then went back to watching his sheep.

The worm, the great dragon, well, he had been a great warrior in the same way that I was once a runner.

Once.

Long time ago.

I was pretty good at it, but I'm definitely not anymore.

And neither was the worm.

It was fairly easy to keep control of a population that was nearly as apathetic as he was.

He wanted them to serve him.

They didn't want to get eaten by him.

No one really pushed the boundaries of either of those things, so they just both kind of stayed the course.

Forever.

Are you the worm?

The talking fox asked.

The worm, who was something like a mini version of the dragon from the movie Dungeons and Dragons Honor Among Thieves, managed to roll over from his pile of mostly rotten food.

The fox could just leave the food shipment by the door and the worm would get to it presently.

Oh my gosh, I'm just I'm so sorry for you, the fox said.

Oh well, of course none of us can expect to live forever.

Well, I must be going.

I just thought I would stop by and say goodbye.

I don't want to be here when the king shows up.

What king?

The worm asked, managing to sit up.

The fox said the worm really wasn't what he used to be.

not knowing that an attacking army was coming to kill him and any of his people who still remained his people.

Okay, what are you talking about?

When is this king coming?

The Cheetos crumbs rolled off the worm as he stood up.

Oh, he's on the highway right now.

That's why I'm on my way out.

I don't want to be mistaken as one of your people when he gets here.

The fox seemed to be getting more and more anxious.

Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh, what are we going to do?

The worm slithered back and forth.

It had been so long since he had done a war.

He was worried that, frankly, he might not still have it.

The fox said, Well, you could hide.

Hide, and then, when the king arrived, the fox could tell his location, and the worm could slither out and kill him.

Without their leader, the army would crumble, the worm would have a big new army that he would control or eat if he wanted to, and the war would be over before it began.

The worm liked that, yeah.

He liked the hiding part.

And he could get on board with the murder part, that he could bring snacks was always a plus.

The fox looked at the castle.

Ah, but it had to be out of the way.

Somewhere he could attack the mighty Miko from behind.

What was that wooden shack the fox saw on the way in?

The worm said the laundry?

Well, it used to be laundry before he ate all the washerwoman.

Now it's more of a glorified linen closet.

The worm thought about it, though.

Actually, that sounded rather nice.

Tucking in under some blankets out there with some snacks, getting to eat a king.

That was a downright pleasant Saturday.

It's Wednesday, but yeah, okay, that'll work.

Grab your snacks, and we'll get you set up in the linen shed, the fox said.

All right, fox, I'm all tucked in and ready for war.

The worm's voice was muffled by the thick door.

If the fox could give him maybe a 20-minute warning before it was murder time, though, he would appreciate it.

He was so cozy in here, he felt a nap coming on.

Hey, hey, fox, I feel like I just heard the door bar coming down, the worm said, still through the door.

Well, we have to lock it in case he tries it, right?

The fox replied.

Can't have the king ruining his own murder.

All right.

You are so crafty, the fox heard.

Then there was an extended pause.

Wait, though.

Couldn't he just unlock it?

Shouldn't I be locking it from the inside?

Yeah, probably, the fox said, but it was a bit garbled.

He was holding the torch and running the flame along the oil he dribbled along the perimeter of the linen shack.

All right, it's locked in here.

You can unlock the outside, the worm said.

Fox, I said you can unlock the outside, otherwise, I can't get out.

Fox.

Wait, do you smell burning?

Fox?

I wonder whose woodsmen these are, the king said.

The blue smocks weren't his.

Wait, were they the worm's men?

What?

The worm?

This guy?

No, who's the worm?

What's the worm?

Why is the worm?

That didn't make sense.

But no, they were not the worm's men.

They were mighty Miko's men.

Right, boys?

We are Mighty Miko's men.

We are mighty Miko's men, the woodsmen said, bending their knees and raising their axes in unison, reading precariously close to suspicious and not genuine, like the fox was worried about.

But the king just figured they were excited to be in the presence of Mighty Miko, their king.

He got that a lot.

He wasn't beloved to the point of road chanting, though, so he was even more impressed with Miko.

The worm, more like the worm, am I right?

It actually works both ways, because instead of being an archaic name for a dragon, I'm referring to the soft, dirt-dwelling creature that can't take a hot sidewalk, let alone the mighty Miko, right?

The horse groom said to all the others, as the party passed the stables.

We are mighty Miko's men, we are mighty Miko's men, the rest chanted, and the king was a little more jealous/slash-impressed.

They continued on.

Are you the guys who came to massacre us?

The shepherd sighed a few hours later.

The king looked to Miko and then back to the shepherd.

Why would they do that?

These were Miko's men, right?

The shepherd said, Yep,

sure were.

There was a bit of silence.

Oh my gosh, okay, they had to do it.

This was so degrading, the shepherd mumbled.

He waved his hands for the other exasperated shepherds.

We are mighty Miko's men.

We are mighty Niko's men.

We are mighty Nikosmen.

That last stop was less enthusiastic, but it made me believe it even more, the king said to Miko.

And then, looking on the horizon, he gasped.

What a castle.

Oh my gosh, Miko staggered back.

He looked over to the king.

He was just he was grateful.

It was like he was seeing it for the first time every time.

They arrived at the gate to the guards in blue smocks, who opened up for their king, the mighty Miko.

The courtyard inside the walls was a flurry of activity as the servants, cooks, and cleaners prepared for the mighty Miko's father-in-law to arrive.

The king was so entranced by the castle that he almost didn't notice the pile of ashes still smoldering.

What's that?

he pointed.

Oh, we were just burning some trash.

Please come inside, the fox grinned, and the group followed.

Everyone was enamored with Miko's humility, when, complimented by the king on his beautiful castle, and how Miko and the princess might not want to visit now, Miko laughed and said when he saw the king's he was certain it was the most beautiful house he had ever seen.

All the nobles knew it was a polite lie, but it was the best type of lie, one that made the king feel good.

A week later, after the king left, Miko went to the fox, unable to express his gratitude toward his friend.

The fox asked if Miko had any reason to feel sad and lonely.

Miko looked around.

He didn't.

He had an awesome castle, people who loved him, and an amazing princess as his wife.

He couldn't thank the fox more.

Then you have no need for me, the fox nodded.

I'm going to bid you farewell.

And though Miko might be able to protest and get the fox to stay, he could see that the time for that was over.

The fox was a gift his father had left him, and now that, like all things, had to come to an end.

Miko thanked the fox again, and the animal, one who had just turned a woodcutter into a king, trotted out past the gate and back into the forest.

The story ends telling us that Miko's father, though he had no wealth to leave his son, left him something else.

Kindness.

Kindness toward an animal in need.

Humility that inspired a kingdom, and graciousness that endeared him to all he met.

Because some things are worth more than money.

So I went with kind of a Ted Lasso, the real treasures are kindness and the friends we made along the way ending.

But if you think about it, the story is fairly subversive.

In the time when this was told, a world more oriented toward the nobility being born better than the rest of us, to have a kid take the throne from a lazy, less deserving king who may or may not be an actual dragon with only his words, and then be seen as a king by all the people born into the nobility, it kind of turns the whole concept on its head.

Add on to that, the people and their recognition of the king carrying the true power, and the teen teen and an animal being the Harlem Globetrotters running circles around the nobles' Washington generals.

What I'm saying is, a lot of these stories are obviously commissioned and told to royalty.

This doesn't feel like one of those.

And I like it all the more for that.

Next week, we're in Korean folklore, where we see the best pickup lines are just asking that person you're interested in for some oranges, and that trolling that annoying couple whose displays of affection are way too public could have disastrous, lifelong consequences.

Also, another plug for the discord.

If you want to talk about the episodes, suggest new stories, ask when fictional is coming back, post art on the art channel, talk to other listeners, or ask when fictional is coming back, check it out at myths.link slash discord.

The creature this time is the Vishop from Armenian folklore.

Now, if someone says they want to meet you in the mountaintop because they have a really fun present for you, but they can't tell you what it is, just come alone and unarmed.

That sounds suspicious.

If that someone is a giant winged snake with poisonous blood, definitely go.

The Vishap lives on Mount Ararat, a mountain that's the main national symbol of Armenia, but exists between the modern nations of Turkey, Iran, Armenia, and Azerbaijan.

And the Vishap knows how to work the system.

It and its brood would go into the houses of the region and steal infants and toddlers, replacing them with evil spirits.

So doing the whole changeling thing.

No word on what they did with the children they stole, but they probably weren't starting a daycare.

This would, of course, attract heroes who would climb the mountain and battle the dragon and the children except for, well, bribes.

I wasn't joking about a fun gift just for you, because the Vishap was a famously good gift giver and would give a gift unique to the visitor.

Additionally, the creature's blood was so poisonous that should it even touch an arrow or sword or clothes, it would convey instant death to all the item came in contact with.

I'm not saying that's why people didn't try to kill it, but that's why I wouldn't try to kill it.

I mean, best case scenario.

You get a Hercules-style hydro poison-coated weapon where you can't touch the blade.

And if you remember, that's actually what killed Hercules, so that's the best case scenario.

Worst case, you have an instant death blood torrent coming from the dragon you just slew.

Yes, I would take the free gift and be on my way too.

It said that the V Shop had a confrontation with the famous dragon slaying god Vahagan.

And while I wasn't able to ascertain how it went, the deity's single defining trait seems to suggest that it did not go well for the V-Shop.

So I guess you no longer have to worry about that or the free gifts.

That's it for this time.

Myths and Legends is by Jason and Carissa Weiser.

Our theme song is by Broke for Free, and the Creature of the Week music is by Steve Combs.

There are links to even more of the music we used in the show notes.

Thank you so much for listening, and we'll see you next time.

Today, we're exploring deep in the North American wilderness among nature's wildest plants, animals, and

cows.

Uh, you're actually on an Organic Valley dairy farm where nutritious, delicious, organic food gets its start.

But there's so much nature.

Exactly.

Organic Valley's small family farms protect the land and the plants and animals that call it home.

Extraordinary.

Sure is.

Organic Valley, protecting where your food comes from.

Learn more about their delicious dairy at OV.coop.

Top reasons your career wants you to move to Ohio.

So many amazing growth opportunities, high-paying jobs and technology, advanced manufacturing, engineering, life sciences, and more.

You'll soar to new heights just like the Wright brothers, John Glenn, even Neil Armstrong.

Their careers all took off in Ohio and yours can too.

A job that can take you further and a place you can't wait to come home to.

Have it all in the heart of it all.

Launch your search at callohiohome.com.

At the UPS store, we have the key to unlock the world of possibilities because we'll sign for your packages and protect them from porch pirates.

Most locations are independently owned.

Product services, pricing, and hours of operation may vary.

See Center for Details.

The UPS Store.

Be unstoppable.

Come into your local store today.