Pin Up Jason, Donna Joins The Traitors and Fatherly "Ed-Vice" with Ed Kelce | EP 144

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I never got any advice on sex from dad.

We never had the burrs and the bees too.

No, we didn't.

No, we didn't.

I did not know how to talk to girls.

You were awkward.

You were uncomfortable.

Jesus Christ, I wasn't going to say that.

I was uncomfortable.

You were a little uncomfortable.

Yeah.

It was AOL Messenger.

Who was it?

What about it was awkward.

Jason, I used to eavesdrop in on your conversations on the phone.

You remember when you told me to...

No,

we can't.

You got to take that out.

We can't do this.

Welcome back to New Heights, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, a wondry show produced by Way Sports and Entertainment and brought to you by Zillow.

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Download the app today.

We're your hosts.

I'm Travis Kelsey, my big brother Jason Kelsey, out of Cleveland Heights, Ohio.

Cincinnati Bearcat alumni.

Shout out to the Cincinnati Bearcats opening up a new indoor.

Subscribe on YouTube, Wondry Plus, wherever you get your podcast.

And follow the show on all social media at New Heights Show with 1S.

Jason, tell the lovely 92%ers, what we got coming up.

We got another great episode for you guys.

First, we're going to try to decide the next movie for New Heights Film Club.

We're also going to look at some wild fan mentions as well as get some fatherly advice.

advice from the one and only ed kelcey that's right ed kelcey's joining us for a little father's day special yeah let's get right to it let's start with some of that new news

new news new news is brought to you by nickelodeon's kid choice awards

the party of summer slime tune in this saturday june 21st at 8 7 central live on nickelodeon all right man how about that i'm tuned in you better have the girls watching I'm sure they're going to be pumped to see who the next male athlete of the year is.

All righty.

You can still vote for new heights for favorite podcasts and Travis for favorite male athlete of the year.

We need that blimp, guys.

I don't know if you're aware.

I do not have a blimp.

Travis has many blimps, but I would love a blimp.

Blimps are awesome, especially when they have the word Nickelodeon tattooed across them and they're orange.

Last new news item, weird recording schedule this month.

Travis will be at mini camp and tight end.

U.

I'm going to be doing stuff down the shore.

We got beer bowl.

I have a golf outing coming up.

We got a bunch of things happening.

We got

hard.

It's going to be hard to get together.

We do have some recorded guests that we think you guys will really look forward to.

Oh, you guys are going to love these guys.

That's right.

That's right.

Looking forward to dropping those here in the next coming weeks.

And that's it for new news.

New news is brought to you by Nickelodeon's Kids Choice Award, the party of Summer Slime.

Tuesday.

Yeah, baby.

This Saturday, June 21st at 8-7 Central live on Nickelodeon.

Yes, sir.

Let's move along to some fan mentions.

We had

some wild, wild mentions this week, but my favorite mention came with this beautiful tattoo of Jason's bald eagle.

This is wild.

I don't really know.

This is wild.

This is, this is, I mean, this is

art right here.

How does somebody come up with this?

The socks, the socks and cleats into the elbow pads and gloves.

What's even?

Jason, do you wear this for Kylie at home?

Is there a picture of you like this?

Because this is, I mean, if they're it, if you're ever in this stance, I would imagine this is what you look like.

Just so confused on how this is a thing.

What do you mean?

Okay, let's click this link for the backstory because I don't know how one ends up with a tattoo like this.

Here's the backstory: from Erica Smith.educates.

Okay, we have an educator here.

Meanwhile, I want to know what incredible person got this tattoo.

Hello.

And then my little man07.

Funny story.

I am a Giants fan.

My husband is an Eagles fan.

We made a bet.

I lost.

Welcome to Pin Up Jason Galzey.

And we're not going to go to Joe for this.

Oh, my gosh.

This story makes it even better.

Oh, my God.

From the educator herself, Erica.

This is absolutely hilarious.

So this is Pin Up Jason.

So a woman lost a bet.

Yep.

Because she's a Giants fan.

That's amazing.

Yeah.

And she's a woman of her word.

I guess, do we know that it's a woman?

How do we know?

I thought Kylie told me it was a woman, and her name was Lauren.

Oh, God.

Kylie's God.

Kylie's all over this.

She was like, what the fuck is this?

Yeah, she wants to see pin up Jason herself.

You should just.

Trust me, she does not want to see pin up Jason.

One night, you should just.

Should I roll into the bedroom like this?

Throw on the elbows.

Throw on my game socks, my elbow pads, go to the facilities and get my hands and wrist tape,

put the gloves on.

Oh, you know what?

This is probably a reference to is your ESPN body mag.

Oh, nice.

I mean, I didn't look like this there.

But you did have the bald eagle over your.

I did have a bald eagle in that ESPN body mag.

I forgot about that.

Yeah.

How could you forget?

How could anybody forget?

The entire starting five.

Yeah.

The whole, the whole, the whole line at it.

Sometimes you block things out that you're not interested in thinking about.

Oh, I know.

Oh, do I know?

I mean, listen, I love a good bet.

That is a hell of a payoff.

Like, she has to walk around with that for the rest of her life.

Yeah.

I mean,

I think it's great.

I guess it's not that bad.

Would you ever get this statue?

I mean, if I lost a bet, I would have to.

What would be the Travis Kelsey version of this?

What?

What do you mean?

Like, if somebody was going to make a provocative Travis Kelsey,

you obviously wouldn't have a bird.

What would you have?

I don't know.

Let's leave it to the 92% because I don't want to talk about that.

Pin up Travis?

God damn it, Jason.

Why'd you throw me under the bus?

I don't know.

This is yours.

This is your world.

Listen, if I'm having pictures made of this,

if I'm having pictures of me made like this, you need to have pictures of you made like this.

It's not fair.

Hey,

there we go.

There we go.

I wish I had shoulders like that.

All right.

What's his appendage?

Is it a

dream catcher?

Is it a

bald eagle?

Arrowhead.

Sharp and pointy.

Dude, do you hear my kids just losing their minds?

Of course.

Why would I hear that?

I think Elliot needs help.

Can I go help Elliot real quick before she loses her mind?

Do your thing, man.

Yeah.

All right.

Now, that about does it for the fan mentions of the week.

Yeah, nice pecker, Jason.

Moving on to some New Heights Film Club.

Hey,

to the film club, New Heights Film Club is brought to you by Reese's and their new PB and J Cups.

Yeah.

We're going to have one last installment of the New Heights Film Club before we wrap up this season.

And we will have you guys vote on which of these four films we will be reviewing.

But first, we need to pick a genre.

That's right.

We need to figure out

what genre we're going to go for.

Do we want to do summer blockbusters?

Maybe just one of our favorites, Adam Sandler, do some Sandler films in honor of Happy Gilmore coming out in July.

We can do some summer scaries.

You guys want to do

some scary movies?

Get into some horror films or just some movies that give you fucking nightmares.

Like Johnny.

Scary movies are fun to revisit because they're absurd.

Especially the older ones.

Yeah, like they don't make any sense.

Like why?

Like just half of them are not even relevant anymore because the technology.

Like they'd be so easily solved in like today's age with phones and whatnot i forget what movie this was man but it was it was about a giant like flock of giant mosquitoes

i know exactly that's uh

i forget the name of the movie well the giant mosquitoes was uh just uh jumanji no no but there was a there was a movie

this is this goes way back before jumanji before jumanji you're talking about birds the alfalfred hitchcock movie it might be i don't know because the only other giant giant insects movie, there's another one, but it was like a giant spider.

There was Skeeter.

That's a movie.

Dude, that's a mosquito.

It might be it, dude.

Yeah, it was literally the biggest fucking mosquitoes ever.

It used to scare the living shit out of me.

This is it, dude.

Dude.

But that's the thing.

These movies are so fucking ridiculous.

This shit used to give me fucking nightmares, dude.

I'm kind of in on an obscure film that a lot of people people haven't seen i like indie films and like stuff that's just like kind of like off the

you ever seen bird box bird box is good yeah sandra completely ridiculous i there was so there were like there was my donke kills my dog kills was in there man there were two like movies where like the people couldn't seen couldn't see and i just could not bring myself like bird box which was it was a fun watch but like it's so ridiculous like you can't see anything and you're gonna get all this like get the fuck out of here i'm not buying it and then the one that was even worse i think was c i think it was an apple tv oh it was still a good watch it can't be it was horrendous they're running through the woods traps i challenge you right now blindfold yourself and run through the fucking woods you will not make it further than about 20 feet all right no i'll figure it out you are gonna hit something no somebody thought of this idea like it was good and i thought it was the worst fucking thing on the planet it was the stupid it was i couldn't do it i don't know why it was awful It was an awful show.

It was really, really bad.

I don't even know which one you're talking about.

Talking about C.

Yeah, I don't think so.

They couldn't couldn't see, but they somehow could still run through the forest.

All right, so what do you want to do?

Do you want to go down scaries?

Do you want to do Sandler films?

Do we want to just leave it up to the 92%ers?

This is what I think.

Our most successful and fan-appreciated versions of these, just going to put it out there, have been either movies that females typically watch or movies that need to be reimagined in like a grown-up capacity.

Like Sandlot was okay, but we didn't really, it didn't have like a lot of like changes from the last time we've seen it.

I think we need to watch something that we haven't, we both have not seen potentially ever and a movie that is really popular that a lot of other people have seen.

But we need to watch it where most people saw it as a child and we are now seeing it as fully developed adults.

So as long as the movie meets that criteria, I'm in on it.

Yeah, well, good luck meeting all that criteria.

Does that make sense, Brandon?

No, it makes all the sense in the world.

What you're saying definitely makes sense, but I just don't know.

Yeah, I don't have that movie off the top of my head.

We're going to have to somehow create a genre.

Well, let's look at movies that were big in the 90s

that Travis and I just haven't seen.

90s rated R Blockbusters is like kind of the search here.

There you go.

That's a start.

It's a start.

It's a start.

Animal House is one.

I think that was more 80s, though.

I mean, they're throwing us Terminator 2, Matrix, Pretty Woman, The Rock is so fucking good.

I mean, I don't think I've seen Pretty Woman.

Ooh, that could...

I think that one would be big.

Pretty woman would be big.

People would appreciate that review, I think.

Pretty woman would be big for us.

Pretty woman.

I think I actually saw this not too long ago.

I think I have seen it, but I can't remember it.

It's been a minute.

Goodfellows is a great one.

Goodfellows would be a great recap, especially living on the East Coast now.

Jerry Maguire, that's kind of interesting as like a professional athlete.

The bodyguard, nah.

speed is so good.

Speed is ridiculous.

Speed is good.

Dude, honestly, we should review Tremors if we're going to go with a movie that's like a horror, but I've already seen them.

But told to recall,

great movie.

Fantastic movie.

Yeah, yeah.

But we've seen it.

Doesn't meet the criteria.

I'm kind of in on Pretty Woman being one of the choices.

All right, so Pretty Woman's one.

Pretty Woman's one.

Dude, 90s teenage movies.

90s teenage movies.

Clueless.

No, no, thank you.

I mean, I've seen it.

10 Things I Hate About You.

American Pie would be fucking hilarious.

American Pie would be funny to go back.

Now getting half of the references.

Okay.

Pretty woman.

She's all that.

I'd go back to that one.

I fucking love that movie.

Wild Things.

Remember sneaking into that one?

I need pictures with these.

I don't.

I'm the worst.

God damn it.

I don't remember any of these.

Faculty's good.

All right.

We've got one so far.

What about Wild, Wild West?

I mean,

I don't.

I don't like that people don't like that movie.

I fucking love that movie.

I think it's secretly a great movie that people have just decided to shit on.

But you got to admit, it's like such a dud after.

I think like the two previous Will Smiths were Men in Black and Independence.

They got to admit that's like a little bit of a drop.

Of course, but it's...

Here's my thing.

I think if you remade Jim Carrey for making the mask and fucking Ace Venturas.

This is my only argument.

If you remade Wild, Wild West.

And then going.

Quentin Tarantino remade Wild, Wild West.

It'd be a fucking banger of a movie.

Quentin Tarantino.

I'm not buying this like it's a bad plot.

Like, robots fucking, like, I think the whole thing is fucking

ridiculous.

I know there's a guy with no legs.

There's a giant spider.

I vaguely recall there's like a

chase in a cornfield.

I mean, it's what I like about movies.

It's completely ridiculous.

Do you want to add

Wild Bild West to the list?

I mean, I'm kind of feeling there's two

It does not meet the criteria I laid out.

Oh my, your criteria is

nobody knows what criteria.

Yeah, we're gonna be here for the rest of the night.

Threat the zigzag.

I kind of like throwing a bunch of just like randoms in there and like letting the 92 percenters dictate it.

Should we just put the tweet out?

Let's just put the tweet out.

Okay.

The criteria is:

Travis and I can never have seen it.

How would they know this?

They don't.

We're going to get replies, though, and there's going to be some that we haven't seen.

All right.

Jake, are you taking notes?

It's got to be a movie that we haven't seen.

Haven't seen it.

It's got to be.

What was the other criteria?

It had to be like from your childhood, so people haven't seen it in a very long time, was the other criteria.

It's got to be like a movie that is

child-centric that a lot of people have not seen since they were children.

Okay.

But

all right.

Or do you not like that criteria?

We can throw that criteria out.

Not everybody was a child when we were a child.

Those people don't count.

Those people don't count.

We don't count them.

There's movies like Brink that were watched by exclusively children at the time.

Like grown-ups were not watching Brink.

Brink would probably be a tough watch.

Brink's a great movie.

It's one of the only Disney movies that has held up.

Brink is fantastic.

Okay.

Pup and Suds.

Are you kidding me?

All right.

Should we just do Brink?

No.

It sounds like you're fine.

Should we just do Disney made for TV movies from the 92?

That's going to get a lot of people going.

Where are we netting out here?

I don't know.

I don't know.

I kind of like the idea of just asking the 92%ers to submit movies, and the rule is we can't have seen it.

That leaves it vague enough.

Just give us movies that you think would be funny to have us review.

Give us movies.

We will decide on this end and we will let you know which one we pick.

Do you like that idea, Travis, or do you not like that idea?

Yeah, let's do it.

We got Travis in.

All right.

You guys send us ideas.

We'll go through them.

We'll pick one and we'll let you guys know what the pick is for July Film Club.

Jason, is there any more criteria you want?

I don't think so.

I think that makes sense.

I think the idea of reviewing a movie that was mostly seen as people, as kids, as adults, sounds interesting to me because you watch it under a different lens.

And most people are going to remember it.

from their time as children.

Yeah.

Could also just do Brink.

I don't know.

I kind of like that idea.

pup and suds could do brink we we mentioned pretty woman that's been on me and tay's movie list for a while i'm down to watch that a movie i think is very underrated wild wild west i love wild wild west and wild wild west 2 there's wild wild west 2 yeah there's not a second wild wild west

yeah this is real you kidding me i think the second one's got owen wilson in it or something i forget what which one is which are you thinking of the movie with jackie chan where him and Owen Whistling are

Shanghai Nights?

Shanghai Nights?

I might have been.

God damn it.

I thought there were two Wild Wild West.

Oh, shit, there is.

Oh, wait, no.

I think that's just Wild Wild West.

Yeah, you're right.

Top question on Reddit: Wasn't there a Wild Wild West 2?

Was there not?

And literal answer is: realized we were thinking of Shanghai Noon.

Shanghai Noon.

Oh, gosh.

Oh, my gosh.

That is fucking.

How many people think Shanghai Noon is just a sequel to Wild Wild West?

Dude, Shanghai Noon, also a good-ass movie.

I wouldn't have mind reviewing Shanghai Noon.

I don't remember it as well as I think.

I just remember he pees on his shirt to bend the bars.

Fuck.

Oh, man.

There might have been two Shanghai Noons.

You said this shirt doesn't break, not piss shirt Ben Bars.

How do you remember this?

I'm a big Jackie Chan fan.

Dude, we could even just do like some Jackie Chan movies.

What's the one that's fucking not Escape from New York?

There's another one.

What do you mean?

No, no, no, no.

There's so many good Shanghai shows.

That is

rookie Jackie Chan.

You got Drunken Master.

You got...

You got, oh my gosh, what is the movie where they're running around New York and it's fucking insane?

Oh, it's so ridiculous of a movie.

Gosh, you're making me want to.

All right, here, let's just get out of this.

Big Trouble in Little To Little China.

Is that it?

Most absurd Jackie Chan movie.

That's what you're typing in.

I do love Drunken Master.

Drunken Master is a great one.

Rumble and the Bronx.

All right.

So basically, 92% is there's really no criteria.

We don't necessarily know exactly what you guys want us to review.

So we just want a little bit of a reference so we can start to narrow this thing down uh send in all your uh requests we'll peek over them and uh and get back to you guys with which movie the new heights film club will review and that does it for new heights film club brought to you by reese and their new pv and j cups all right before we get to pop it kelsey there's something we need to uh disclose He's from a different time and era, people.

Viewer discretion is advised.

We don't know what this fucking guy's about to say.

I mean, I just got to be honest with you he's a little wild card he is one of the nicest most genuine people on the planet not a negative bone in his body it's just

yeah you know anybody with a grandpa knows something all right here we go we're gonna get that kelsey out of here hope you guys enjoy this

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Jason wants a blimp.

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He hasn't been cool enough yet.

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Father's Day was this past Sunday.

Hey, bringing the only man who can help us out with some Heights hotline.

Father's Day

Edvice.

Shout out to Twitter user Eva G for coming up with the name Edvice.

Eva G on Twitter, will this be on a regular episode or just a Wondery Plus episode?

I would love some Edvice.

Nice Father's Gice.

Advice from Ed Kelsey live from Not Gonna Lie Studios.

We have Ed Kelsey joining us.

Dad, how are we doing?

We're doing great.

We're doing great.

Good shirt, choice.

Appreciate your CL Studios, sir.

Shout out to Kai for getting us nice and set up.

Dad, you look great.

Good.

You got the wings going?

I should pull my hat off and get my wings showing a little bit.

Jason, you just got the.

The longer hair?

These are like the wings from the flying nun.

Flying nun.

I don't, I don't get, I don't know the reference.

It must have been an 80s or 70s reference.

What's the flying nun?

More like 65, 64.

Sally Field was a nun, and she wore one of those hats with the wings, and the wind would come by and lift her in the air.

Oh, wow.

Oh!

The flying nun.

Now we get it.

Wow.

There you go.

Did she invent the cookies?

Is that Sally Fields?

What's the cookie I'm thinking of?

Famous Amos?

No, Mrs.

Fields.

No, she did not make Mrs.

Fields.

Okay.

All right.

Sorry.

All right.

We've gone down a rabbit hole already.

All right.

I guess where do we start, Dad?

What do you think of Father's Day?

Let's start off with there.

What do I think of it?

Yeah.

What are your thoughts on Father's Day?

My thoughts on Father's Day is a celebration of your kids.

Yep.

All right.

All right.

And how happy you are.

Nice.

I'll celebrate to that.

And what a great job you did as a dad.

Yeah.

There you go.

Or doing, right?

There's still.

Do you ever stop being a dad?

Do you consider yourself dad still?

Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

How 100%.

Jason, he was such feasuring you two seconds ago into getting your ass in there there to see a doctor about your sleep apnea.

Yeah, I'm not going into a doctor.

They all know what they're talking about.

How is being a dad different at this stage as opposed to being a dad

when we were like

Wyatt Bennett's and Elliott's age?

And Finn.

Sorry, Finn.

A lot more relaxing.

At this stage, everything's just a lot of fun.

Less work.

You're not fretting about.

How they're doing in school, how they're treating teammates, how things are going in the neighborhood with them,

how much trouble they got into that can be directly tracked back to you.

What do you fret about these days between Travis and I?

Between Travis and you are not much.

Not much.

I think you're doing great.

Yes.

So you do think that Father's Day is a real holiday.

Jason, do you think Father's Day is a real holiday?

I think Father's Day is.

I think, yes, first of all, it's a real holiday.

Anybody, anything that celebrates parents and family and

raising children in this world should absolutely be celebrated.

Okay.

I think that Father's Day and Mother's Day is celebrated across every nationality in some way.

Actually, there's a really good way that the Germans celebrate it.

We mentioned this last year on the podcast.

I would love to do this with dad one day.

You know how Germans celebrate Father's Day, Pop?

No, tell me.

The family...

drops them off at like a woods and they have a wagon that is filled with beer and different types of meats and sausages.

And the dads just wander up into the mountains with a bunch of beer and sausages, and they hang out together for a day.

And then they come back to meet their families afterwards.

I'll tell you what.

Sounds pretty fun.

We can wander back to the pool and do the same thing.

There we go.

Perfect.

There we go.

We'll just get a wagon and ceremony and walk out the backyard.

Dad, mom's in Traders.

What?

No, we can't say this.

Oh, it's already, it's public.

It's public.

Rumored, rumored, rumored.

What?

It's public now?

It's public.

She's allegedly.

I was lectured by your mother not to talk about it.

Okay, well, can we record something for when we can say this?

What do you think are mom's chances?

Chances are what?

Of winning.

Winning.

Do you understand?

Do you understand?

I have no idea what she's doing.

So this is the premise of this.

It's a game show.

It takes place in Scotland.

Basically, there's a group of people, and there's two people in that group, or a select amount of people, are traders, which are people that can eliminate other people week by week.

And the group of individuals that aren't the traders need to try and devise who the traders are before the traders eliminate all of the non-trader contestants.

What?

I'm sorry.

All right, perfect.

So,

what do you think mom's chances are of winning such game shows?

I haven't got a fucking clue.

Don't know?

Okay.

I don't know.

I'm not

reality TV

show type person.

That's not true.

You used to love.

What's that?

What were the history ones?

What was the one where they used to bid on the freaking

storage wars?

You were big Storage Wars.

Never saw that in my life.

I never saw...

I mean, I've seen it on TV, but I haven't sat down and watched it.

Storage Wars.

I used to sit there and watch.

What's the...

No, we watched the two guys.

We watched the two guys who went around hunting for junk.

Yep, the American

Pickers.

Then you used to watch the Vegas one with the Chum Lee.

What's the

Vegas?

Oh, yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

So don't give me that shit.

Don't give me the shit out of reality TV, guys.

No, don't act like you're above reality TV.

You used to sit down and watch Jackass with us.

Yeah.

What?

As I recall, I was

pretty much adamantly opposed to Jackass.

Yeah, no, I think that's accurate.

I'm pretty sure.

Oh, man.

But you were missing out.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

You're lost.

I want to get Ed Kelsey's reaction to this photo.

All right.

Brandon, you know exactly what photo I'm talking about.

I have no idea what photo.

So you're going to get my reaction to.

No, no, no.

Did somebody actually do that?

This is tattooed on a woman.

I think her name is Lauren's Arm.

Yeah, no, this is a bet that somebody lost, and they have this tattooed permanently under there.

Permanently?

That's not a henna?

I mean, I think you could take them off these days, but no, I think that's an actual tattoo.

Oh, what do you think?

Immediate reactions.

Immediate reaction?

Yeah.

Fucking loony.

You know, what else can I say?

That's this is.

It's provocative.

I saw that on one of the social media, and that's a cringe-worthy.

Cringe?

without even without it being on somebody's arm, just the picture itself.

I've never heard the word you use the word cringe, so that's this is a new territory.

I think it's pretty, it's pretty

like that, huh?

Yeah, that's right.

That's right.

I think I, I don't, I don't think I look half bad, if I'm being honest.

I think it's a pretty, they did me a solid.

This might be the best you've ever looked.

You could take that off the screen now.

Fair enough.

I have to ask Kai that one, though.

All right, let's get to some Heights hotline, man.

Let's get to the fun stuff, baby.

We're going to listen to some voicemails, Dad, that our viewers and listeners have sent us asking for parent advice.

And normally Travis and I answer them, but we always wish you were here to do this because we know you would answer them far better than we can.

Yeah.

This one is titled Unwritten Rules with Dad.

Hey, Jason.

Hey, Travis.

Huge fan of the show.

My question, my no-dumb question is, what was like an unwritten rule you had with your dad growing up?

One of my unwritten rules I had always with my dad was when I'd be in the car with him, it would be nothing but

his music he loved 70s, 80s rock, 90s rock.

Sounds like a good dad.

And we always watched football

games together.

And that was like our big, like two big unwritten rules was

bad

I hope

have a good day and ghost dealers

oh there we go

we didn't have any un we didn't have any written rules they were all unwritten I I only remember one but it was it was literally a rule that he he told me was but he only told me once it was you got to be home before the streetlights come on that was the only like unwritten rule that's a rule that date back dates back to the 60s, at least.

Since streetlights were a thing.

Did you write down any rules?

I don't remember any written rules.

Oh, I don't know about any written rules.

No, no.

I think they were all unwritten, but there are tons of rules.

Yeah.

Don't talk back to your mom.

Finish your food on the table.

Finish what you're eating.

Yep.

There's starving kids in China.

Don't hit your brother in the face.

No punches to the head.

Can we still use their starving children in China?

Is that still an acceptable way to get children to eat food?

I think that's to each his own, Jason.

I don't know.

I kind of gave up on that one.

The fact of the matter is,

I waited all these years for you and Travis to come back with Aunt Judy's retort.

What was Aunt Judy's?

Well, if they were here, they could have my food.

Believe it's Aunt Judy.

All right.

What were some other Ed Kelsey rules?

If you run, it's only going to be worse.

I remember that one.

Yeah.

Come here.

If you run, it's only going to be worse.

I don't know.

I'm drawing a blank here.

Yeah, that's pretty good.

I think it was more situational.

The rules came up where there was a situation that demanded it.

There was the golden rule, which kind of everything else fit within the golden rule.

Then there was respect

your teachers, your

respect everyone.

Yeah, well like but there was something there was another level for like either teachers educators or people that were older than you which I felt like if we ever

respect your elders yeah yeah if we ever came back and like one of the older

just parents or anybody was saying something you were like all right that's enough of that like I feel like that was a big one and that wasn't always easy to say

and I and the reason I mentioned it is you know how many of those parents or elders were just full of shit yeah I know you know but you're just trying to keep your kid quiet and get out of there.

Yeah, but the chances are your kid is full of more shit than the elders are, right?

No?

Oh, no, sadly.

And that's something you'll come to realize.

All right, fair enough.

As the girls get older.

All right.

Your time is not so much keeping your kids in line as it is deflecting criticism and rolling your eyes in front of the friggin idiots.

Okay.

All right.

Wonderfully said.

Love that.

What were your rules as far as like sports went?

No I in team.

Yep.

You're never as good as they say.

You're also never as bad as they say.

Yeah.

Ignore what people say.

Yep.

Hard work and hustle beats talent.

Always has, always will.

I don't know if you did it on purpose or if it was just the athletes that you genuinely appreciated most, but you would always always point out the athletes that were uh besides the ones that were really good and had personalities i remember you loved charles barkley we've been on that multiple times always been a big fan of chuck you'd always point out like the guys that like ran hard or hustled like pete rose and like different sure we were watching games it was like yeah it was always like athletes that like either were intense or gave above and beyond like effort.

I remember that was one of the things that defied the odds.

Yeah.

Never stopped tracking that ball.

Things like that.

Sure.

I think we can hit the next one.

Irrational Mad Dad Moment is this title.

Hey guys, this is Zach.

I wanted to talk to you about Father's Day and it coming up soon.

And it made me think of times that my dad got irrationally mad at us.

And I wanted to know if there was any time Papa Kelsey got irrationally mad over something little.

Like I I remember our big one at home was dad got mad at us because the toothpaste was in the downstairs bathroom, not the upstairs bathroom.

We got like a five-minute lecture about it.

He's yelling and screaming.

Anyway, that does feel a little bit irrational.

You guys had a similar experience with your dad.

Or maybe, Jason,

can you admit you having yourself an irrational, mad dad moment?

Oh, absolutely.

I admit, Spike.

I don't ever remember dad being irrational.

I'm pretty sure he was rationally mad.

You should have been there when Travis put the hand lotion in the shampoo bottle.

I mean, that's pretty rationally mad.

That's pretty rational.

You put some hand lotion on your handpoint.

You came down the steps and your hair looked like it was glued together.

Like you had just washed your hair.

Looked like Cameron Diaz out of, what is that movie?

Looking ridiculous.

I looked at you.

I was like, oh, shit, what did I do?

Yeah, Travis looked at me and boom, he's out of there.

Yeah, looked like Cameron Diaz from Something About Mary.

Surprised you didn't go right through the screen door when he ran away.

It's like, oh, I didn't realize that.

And

you were late to go to work or you were on your, you were trying to hurry up and get out the door.

And

yeah, that was a rational.

I feel like most of the times I remember it's pretty rational.

Rationally mad was a big.

a big one for Ed Kelsey.

There was a reason for him to be upset.

What was I trying to think of an irrational one?

I can't really, nothing comes to mind off my head.

What do you think, Pop?

Do you remember any?

No, I'm drawing a blank.

I remember you irrationally.

You remember when

we were sledding down the hill?

This was back when we lived in North Ridgeville.

It was me, you, and,

oh my gosh, the one neighbor.

Oh, what was his name?

I think it's me and you, or us two, and you were on one sled, and we were headed for a rock.

And I still don't know how this all went down, but you ended up jumping in front of us on the sled, and the rock broke your ribs.

So you're screaming.

Yeah, I broke a couple of ribs.

That was

screaming in pain.

I tried to hang out.

I remember his name just because I remember this irrational moment from you.

We're driving in the car, and Billy says, Billy, that's right.

Billy says something to you about driving.

And you're like, shut the fuck up, Billy.

He asked me if I'm okay.

He saw me wincing in pain.

He asked me, can you drive?

He said, shut the fuck up.

That was one of those things where

I was trying to avoid the rock, and we all went over.

And to keep from hurting one of you guys, I tucked my elbows in so I would roll over.

And that's how I broke the ribs.

Why didn't you just grab us and roll the other way?

I'm trying to envision how this rock would soak.

God damn it, that's

when you have one of those moments you could ask yourself, why didn't I go the other way?

Fair enough.

Fair enough.

I get irrationally mad all the time.

The problem with children is they're irrational.

So that causes you to be irrationally mad sometimes.

There's a lot of irrational things happening when you're dealing with little kids.

All right.

Fictional father.

Let's go with that one.

Oh, shut the fuck up.

Fictional fathers.

Okay.

This should be good.

Hi, this is Lacey from Missouri.

And I was just wondering

if Father's Day is coming up Jason

what fictional father would you say closely

most closely resembles your parenting style

and

I think that's it actually

have a good day okay Lacey nice I'll say this I think my parenting style probably mostly resembles

a non-fictional character and my own dad.

I think that I definitely am very, I find myself being more and more similar to dad in the way I talk and do things with my children.

And I think dad, I'm trying to think like, who's the best fictional character that dad is represented by?

Is it red from that 70s show?

I feel like he's got a little bit of that,

but maybe not as like curmudgeony.

He's more supportive of his children.

Yeah.

Who's a like, who's a rough around the edges but very supportive father?

I'm trying to

Al Bundy.

Oh my gosh.

That is low-key.

I mean, he's not supportive of his kids at all.

Al Bundy's good.

He's got, yeah, it's, you got to go with a hodgepodge.

It's got the sense of humor of Al Bundy

combined with the fatherly nurturing of like a huxtable.

What's like Bill Cod?

We can't mention Bill Cosby, unfortunately, but the character was phenomenal

on the show.

Yeah.

So I think, you know, that's pretty good.

I would say it's kind of like that.

Did you think that's accurate, Pop?

I mean, that's damn good.

That's pretty good.

If you want to go,

no, I'm drawing Ed What?

What's the guy's name from

Married with Children?

Ed What?

Al Bundy.

Al Bundy.

No, that was his

real name.

Oh, you're talking about Modern Family.

No, I'm thinking.

What's his real name?

Ed O'Neill from Youngstown, Ohio, baby.

Yeah.

Played for the Steelers.

He played for the Steelers?

yeah he did i think it was only one or two years

if i'm not mistaken he was a linebacker i'm not sure are you thinking of jack lambert look it up dude try me all right i listen brandon look it up right now had a brief stint with the pittsburgh steelers holy shit well well done dad and o'neil baby and he's from young four touchdowns one game He's from Youngston.

No,

that was Al Bundy's big game.

Yeah.

Polk High.

But he did a movie where he

went to his girlfriend's house to get her kid

who had been disappointed by his real father.

Yes.

And he had to get him across town, or not across town, across the country, drive to meet his mother.

I forget the name of that movie, but I just heard a kid was having such a fit.

He tied the kid's feet.

and legs around a hockey stick and carried him out like a suitcase.

That's a very Gelsey move right there.

That's a good one.

Ed O'Neill, really in any dad, because he's the grandpa and the dad in Modern Family, and he's very much a similar temperament to him.

I didn't know he's from Youngstown, but that makes a ton of sense.

Yeah, that's a lot of ties right there.

Maybe that's why we got so much of that.

One of my favorite things ever in the house, and all my friends still say this to this day, is there was never like any come downstairs, talk to the guys, let them know you can't do that.

It was just a scream from the second floor office.

Hey,

hey, shut the fuck up.

Yeah.

And immediately everyone froze.

It was like, yeah, we can't do that anymore.

All right.

Yeah, we're done.

Yeah, I do remember one time at, we're at the rink,

and Travis and a bunch of kids were playing.

hockey outside the rink while you were skating.

Yep.

And

you know, they used to do that in the one corner oh yeah of the rink and some people some some uh some grandparents are trying to get by to go up the stairs and i was on the other side of the rink i yelled out yo it's like seven kids dropped the hockey sticks right away

listen it dude it it transit it translates it translates to me we were at the phillies game this week and we took the girls and some some family friends brought their kids And one of the other kids, I don't even realize this is like a thing that just our family does.

But one of the other kids was standing like, you know, on a suite, how like the front, she was like climbing on the front of it.

And I was like, no!

And immediately she like gets startled and then starts crying.

And I'm like, oh, fuck, I just fucked this up.

Like, this kid isn't normally used to getting this kind of treatment.

I'll tell you, one of the coolest things is, and this was maybe two or three,

one of the last few years that Jason played.

were in the downstairs in the family room in that that lounge.

And, you know they've come by four or five times trying to get people to leave and i walk over by the door and the security guy was being the security guys were very cool about it they weren't rushing you but people were getting nancy so i just told the guy i said watch this and i just yell yo all of a sudden everybody starts walking out dude it's a powerful like like kylie's family has the whistle ed can do that loud like

and that's i'm jealous of that so am i i don't know that there's like the yo is undefeated.

You jump on a yo in the middle of a crowd.

You could say yo right now in the middle of a sea of people.

I'm like, oh shit, Ed Kelsey's here.

Let's get to one more.

That was a dadism, if I'd ever heard one.

Let's listen to one more of these things.

MJ from LA here.

I'd like to know what is the best piece of advice your dad gave you about dating, sex, marriage, and parenting.

And also, what is the worst piece of advice he's ever given you?

Thank you, and love the show.

Okay, thank you.

That's an awesome question.

I never got any advice on sex from dad.

We never had the birds and the bees together.

No, we didn't.

No, we didn't.

Yeah.

No.

He left that to the Cleveland Heights Public School School system.

Yeah, the health.

Health class.

I lived without it.

You can too.

Mr.

Hoon and Man.

Robolowski.

Robolowski, Coach Robo, taught us about sex.

Hey, man, Coach Jones.

Mike Jones was a.

Man, Coach Jones, that's right.

What were the other ones?

Dating?

I remember

I was trying to figure out how to get a girl to

think I was funny or cool.

And in early middle school, maybe like sixth, seventh grade, might have even been younger than that.

And

this funny way of like, hey, you know, just be her friend.

Just be cool with her.

Just be, you know, she doesn't like it.

You know, pretty girls all hang around pretty girls.

right.

Yeah, sis.

I was like, all right, yeah, there you go.

Just be friends with them.

That's right.

And

I do remember a brief discussion Jason and I had when he was at UC.

Oh, wow.

Okay.

Yeah.

He was telling me that, you know, how good I was with the women.

Yeah, I'll see these girls, but I really don't want to.

He said, I really don't know what to talk about.

And I...

told you then and it's true for every guy, any guy listening.

You know, I know I play football.

I know everybody likes to talk about that, but tell me about you.

Oh, wow.

All you got to do is shut up and get them to talk about themselves, and you ain't got to say another word.

Nod your head.

Oh, wow.

Yeah, cool.

Oh, wow.

Oh, wow.

You know, they add the little comments in there to make her feel good and just

you don't have to say nothing.

You know what I mean?

This is good.

This is this is why you remind us of other meals.

This is why you remind us of us.

Also, why I live alone.

Hey, I actually don't think he's listening to me.

He's just acting like he wants to

figured you out.

Well, I was on AOL Insta Messenger, and you would definitely encourage me to just talk to girls because you could tell that I was just, I did not know how to talk to you.

You were awkward.

You were uncomfortable.

Jesus Christ, I wasn't going to say that.

I was uncomfortable.

You were a little uncomfortable.

Yeah.

Who was it, man?

We were fucking...

It was AOL Messenger.

Who was it?

What about it was awkward.

You just said you're real at ease talking to girls.

Jason, I used to eavesdrop in on your conversations on the phone.

You remember when you told me to...

No,

you got to take that out.

We can't do this.

And that's all the ed advice we got for you.

I'll tell you advice I gave you that

you didn't pay attention to.

What's that?

Katie

would say that she sees you and she says hi to you but you say nothing back oh really i tried to tell you you see katie talk to her not that you have to go out and that you're going to start dating her she's a little older than you yada yada i did not know how to talk to girls but every girl in school is watching you talk to this hot older chick this hot older chick

there you go all right all right

and kelsey happy father's day everybody

dad i'll see you for father's day maybe love you big guy thanks for thanks for coming on here and having some fun with us.

Anytime.

You know what?

Love you, Pop.

Love you.

All righty.

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All righty, folks.

That's

that's our dad.

That's Ed Kelsey.

That's dad.

With some great fatherly advice.

Love you, Dad.

We got to incorporate dad more in the show.

He's a wealth of just like entertainment.

Come on.

This is my favorite human being, man.

Beer Bull submissions are also closing tonight.

We will notify the teams that make it by this Friday, June 20th.

Send to at NewHudge Show with 1S and use Beer Bowl.

We've had a lot of good submissions this year, and we're narrowing it down.

Right.

We're going to shout out Drew Garrison.

Drew Garrison from Cincinnati, I believe.

If I hopefully that's the right one, let's take a look at this link from one of the submissions.

Oh wow.

Okay.

Play a little beer bowl, little beer bowl.

Oh, nice little team action.

Make beers go bye-bye.

Oh, no.

Bad pass.

Texas serious, though.

Profanity, that's how you know he's serious.

Oh, no.

Oh, gosh.

This is, they have a lot of good

impressive teamwork on the beer bowl.

I will say this is a very long match.

It's got to be multiple matches.

I mean, extra points for all the Garage Beer merch.

Drew Garrison out of Cincinnati.

That was fun.

That was good content.

That was good.

It's good content.

They're also playing my favorite game, which is beer ball.

Beer ball is my favorite beer drinking game and requires teamwork, athleticism, and beer drinking ability, all combined with that one.

He had the no-look pass down.

Shout out to Drew Garrison.

Sibling Swagger.

I like this intro already.

This intro is.

Oh, I know.

Yeah, baby.

I'm all about this.

Legend

of the hidden temple.

Fuck yes.

Welcome to New Heights.

Intro is epic.

I'm getting so excited about it.

Unmatched prowess sought the legendary treasure hidden deep within.

Not gold nor jewels, but their mother's famed Thanksgiving dinner rolls.

Legends spoke of their woes on the flag of

This is so ridiculous.

This is AI.

How did they get it?

This is creepy.

Jason, the elder.

How fucking long is this?

Do they at any point show themselves?

That is crazy.

What colour was that?

Go back to his correct answer.

Go back to his correct answer.

This is amazing.

Next question.

How did the legend describe the dinner rolls?

Blue bear kudos.

This is incorrect.

God damn it.

They have to be in.

This is this is legendary.

Warm and funny.

That is correct.

What color was the labyrinth?

Blue bear kuddins.

That is not one of our choices.

Jackwater.

Emerald.

That is correct.

Dog, they have.

This is great.

They're in just for the creativity.

God damn it.

My face hurts, man.

That was fucking gold.

I'm thinking about taking away points for AI because I'm pretty sure Olmac was AI'd out the ass, but I don't care.

That was so good.

You got to keep it in.

Wonderful job.

Oh, shit was epic.

The standing there with the beer.

Sibling Swagger is in.

That was good.

That was outstanding.

I'm also trying to obtain Korean announcers for Beer Bowl.

So if there's anybody that has experience being an announcer in the language of Korean, we would love to have you be the host for this year's Beer Bowl.

Think about how electrical it would be.

You're going to write a book on how to get canceled.

It It would.

It would.

You're going to write a book on how to get canceled.

I don't do that.

I mean, listen, they're better than U.S.

announcers.

I'm just saying.

Announcers in English is kind of electric.

Fucking Korean announcers.

There's just something about it.

It fucking gets the party fucking going.

It's going to be absurd.

It's going to be incredible.

People are going to be into this fucking thing.

You're going to have to have translators talking to the teammates?

No, that's not.

Yeah.

I mean, it's the way if they do it in baseball.

They do it with Shohei Otani in Major League Baseball.

New Heights Beer beer bowl brought to you and presented in korean all right dude i think it'd be a lecture i'm just saying i think it'd be pretty gonna find out i guess if you guys well we might not i don't know that we're gonna be able to find any korean announcer over there on the jersey shore

i i think they might be in korea just a hunch yeah that makes sense south korea probably keep sending in those beer bowl submissions guys that was uh that was a lecture all righty That wraps up another episode of New Heights.

Thank you to Papa Kelsey for joining us on the show.

Next week, Chiefs fans, you're going to be loving the episode we got for you.

We got another great guest for you guys.

So make sure you're subscribed on YouTube to the New Heights channel.

Follow New Heights on the Wonderry app or wherever you get your podcast.

You can listen to new episodes of New Heights early and at free right now by joining Wondery Plus on the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts.

Once again, New Heights, a Wondery Show, produced by Wave Sports and Entertainment and brought to you by Zillow.

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And just to fucking get on the app and start looking at shit.

Yeah, exactly.

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Thanks for tuning in.

Did Kylie show you the pin up first?

Yeah, actually.

She beat me to it.

Yeah, I think she saw it on TikTok.

She did see it on TikTok because I then couldn't find it.

And I was like, what the hell is that thing at?

Yeah, I'm pretty sure it was like already the thing on TikTok was pinup Jason.

I like that we're calling it pinup Jason.

It's pinup Jason.

What do you want to call it?

It's so fucking your little, little

perverted.

No, it's artistic.

Yeah, Jason.

You got to celebrate.

You're just showing yourself.

One of the comments, I mean, a lot of the comments made me laugh.

One of my favorites was, it's got a good pecker on

the old pecker,

the old woodpecker, right?

Good-looking pecker on that guy.

Well,

let's let's get that thing off our screen.

Yeah, let's let's let's move on.