Gunnar Henderson, Dingers Only Draft, NBA Free Agency And USMNT May Suck

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Speaker 1 On today's part of my take,

Speaker 1 we are back shortly on break. We're going to talk a little NBA free agency.
Then we have Gunner Henderson from the Baltimore Orioles,

Speaker 1 future MVP Gunner Henderson. And then we're going to do our dingers-only draft.
So it is our week of vacation, but we're here to give you a little update of what's going on.

Speaker 1 We're going to do a hot seat, cool throne. We're going to send you on our way.
Our next show will be back on Monday after the 4th with Joe Burrow. Great interview with him.

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Speaker 1 No place to hang out or washing.

Speaker 1 And then again the game all on the sounds. Oh, no, we're gonna rock it down to Electric Avenue.

Speaker 1 And then we'll take it higher.

Speaker 1 Oh, we're gonna rock it down to Electric.

Speaker 6 It's part of my take, presented by Marshall Sports.

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Speaker 1 And PFT,

Speaker 1 we have Playoff P and Joelle and Bede teaming up in Philadelphia. NBA free agency, not as fun as it used to be.
which is by design. They changed the rules of NBA free agency.

Speaker 1 So anyone who complains like, oh, we don't have all this drama, that literally is what people were complaining about before with the super teams.

Speaker 1 But Paul George is the big ticket in the NBA free agency. And this is going to be so, so good when they flame out of the playoffs.

Speaker 6 I don't know. I think this is what switches all around for Philly.
I like this. I like that.
You know what? The Sixers are all in, baby. Josh Harris is all in.
That's what he does. I like the move.

Speaker 6 Paul George is a great player. Should be a good compliment to Embiid if he plays well.
They got Maxie. That's their big three.
So I'm happy for Max. I was very excited.

Speaker 6 The news broke at 3.30 in the morning. It actually broke at 11.30 a.m.
over lunch overseas here. So I got to see it.
And then everybody was like, I can't wait till everyone else wakes up about it.

Speaker 6 I just wanted Max to be awake in that moment to see how giddy he would get and how much he would just squeal.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's funny because I actually like the move as well. The Sixers have been building up to this moment to add the third star.

Speaker 1 And Paul George is a very good player, but it is just very funny that it's Paul George because

Speaker 1 I just don't see how this is going to end in anything but tragic heartbreak for Max.

Speaker 1 And, you know,

Speaker 1 it's just the perfect setting. I do think they're going to be very good.
They do have one of the best big threes, if not the best big three in the NBA. But again, it's...
What, Hank?

Speaker 1 You want to chime in there?

Speaker 1 One of the best. How old is this guy?

Speaker 1 He's 34 he's 34 let me just jump in real quick because it's really a big four it's a big four they got embedded they got maxi they got paul george and they no longer have uh the contract to uh tobias harris yeah shout out tobias harris i mean that 50 million dollars for two years from the pistons being an

Speaker 1 everyone learned how to dribble and shoot because being an nba player this time of year you just get reminded like it rocks getting these kind of contracts all right so Max,

Speaker 1 how are you feeling? What would you like to say about our good friend Connor Griffin who said

Speaker 1 we have to get to at least one Eastern Conference final?

Speaker 3 That was the biggest form of loser talk that I've ever seen before in my life. Like you get the biggest signing of the free agency.

Speaker 3 You finally get that two-way wing player that Embiid has been looking for since Jimmy Butler. And then you're like, if we get to an Eastern Conference final, it's a success.
That's bullshit.

Speaker 3 Hank, just with a no ball-knowing take saying that he's old and he's washed. He's coming off one of the best years of his career last year.

Speaker 3 He probably doesn't have the four-year longevity of his contract to be an elite player. But we got two years.
It's a two-year window to at least make,

Speaker 3 we have to at least make a finals. Make a finals, play for

Speaker 1 Eastern Conference or NBA.

Speaker 3 NBA Finals, beat the Celtics.

Speaker 1 NBA finals.

Speaker 3 We have to beat the Celtics one of these next two years.

Speaker 1 In the playoffs?

Speaker 1 What if you get to the NBA Finals, but the Celtics, you don't beat the Celtics on the path? Is that then an Asterisk?

Speaker 3 Not an Asterisk. It still will feel good, but it won't feel.

Speaker 3 We could beat the Celtics in the first round, and it could feel...

Speaker 1 So what? You guys got the eight seed?

Speaker 3 No, the Celtics have the eight.

Speaker 6 We have the one. I love how in Max's wildest dreams, success is making it to the NBA Finals and losing.

Speaker 1 Yeah. No, no, no, no, no.

Speaker 3 That's the

Speaker 3 worst case scenario, best case scenario.

Speaker 6 I know you said that's the worst version of success.

Speaker 1 Yes. Yeah.
Yes. Yes.

Speaker 1 I do like the move for the Sixers. They built up for this point.
They got, you know, Paul George. It's going to be a good team.
I also love Paul George, especially in this day and age.

Speaker 1 I feel like Paul George knows that he's just not a number one guy. He's a really, really good basketball basketball player, but he's like, I want to go try to compete.

Speaker 1 The Clippers didn't want to give me a fourth year. The Clippers are essentially like not restarting, but their whole failed Kawhi Paul George James Harden thing.

Speaker 1 They have to figure that out. And Paul George is like, yeah, I'm not a number one guy.
I'd like to go play some meaningful basketball.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 let's go to Philly, where Joel Embiid and Tyrese Maxi will take a lot of the burden off my shoulders. And I just got to be Paul George.
It's got to be playoff P.

Speaker 6 Yeah,

Speaker 6 it is perfect. Like Paul George, a guy whose name is synonymous with playoff success joining the 76ers.
It's funny. It's very funny.
It's a great superstar addition for the culture of Philadelphia.

Speaker 6 But I do think from a basketball standpoint, it's going to be fun. And also, you just mentioned like James Harden, that whole experiment out there.
James Harden

Speaker 6 hates the Sixers front office.

Speaker 6 And apparently... Paul George was like, yeah, I'm not going to pay any attention to what you say.

Speaker 6 You're probably the problem, James.

Speaker 6 I've seen enough close up with my own two eyes to know that maybe I should not trust what you're saying about them.

Speaker 1 Yes. Yes.
Okay. So Paul George was the big ticket.

Speaker 1 Again, it is, it's funny because you have seen people complain like, oh, this NBA free agency sucks. That was the whole point that you can't create.
It's harder to create super teams now

Speaker 1 and you don't have the crazy movement, every NBA free agency. Other big moves,

Speaker 1 a couple. I have a couple I want to talk about.
One,

Speaker 1 Stan Cronky strikes again, KCP going to the magic and Stan Cronky unwilling to pay luxury tax and build, like when, if you're going to have a time when you should pay extra money and pay taxes and

Speaker 1 like just throw everything in, wouldn't it be when you have the three-time MVP in the prime of his career? But nope, that's just not what the Nuggets are going going to do.

Speaker 1 And I feel like that was a huge, that's one of those ones that we're going to look at somewhere mid-season and be like, oh, shit, the Nuggets just, they're kind of missing a guy, and it's KCP.

Speaker 6 It's also great for the Magic. The Magic showed a little white in the playoffs.
I think it's a great move for them.

Speaker 6 Yeah, that's just Stan Cronky being Stan Cronky, but they might just look at the rest of their team and say, like, I don't know, maybe

Speaker 6 we've got the guys that we don't need them necessarily.

Speaker 5 And

Speaker 6 he doesn't want to pay the taxes. The Boston Celtics don't give a fuck about taxes.
The Boston Celtics are paying everybody and their contracts.

Speaker 6 I read a stat online that says that when the current set of contracts is over,

Speaker 6 they will have paid more in luxury than the Clippers have paid in the entire existence of the franchise.

Speaker 7 Whoa.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 the Celtics, Hank, now, are you going to buy them? What's going on? Maybe if you can dunk, you'll have a little seed investment on your way to buying the Celtics. They're for sale now?

Speaker 5 Yeah, I'm forming a group. I'm trying to raise some capital.

Speaker 5 But yeah, I mean, they're selling high, I guess. Like, kind of makes sense.
It's going to be, you know, probably the most expensive NBA franchise ever sold.

Speaker 5 So I'm going to see what I can do.

Speaker 1 We should. Oh, man.
You guys want to throw down? No, I'm just thinking about we're going to be... Listen, come on.

Speaker 1 We're going to,

Speaker 1 I'll give you, if you dunk, I'll give you $10,000 and that will go towards it. Hank,

Speaker 1 what?

Speaker 5 That's my money, though, after I dunk.

Speaker 1 Right, but that's you can use that towards

Speaker 1 buying the Celtics.

Speaker 1 Hank, we're going to Tahoe next week to do a bunch of interviews. Work.

Speaker 1 I think you need to get a little elevator pitch, and every single rich athlete we talk to, at the end of the interview, you give them a quick two-minute pitch on why they should,

Speaker 1 you know, invest in Hank Lockwood LLC that is going to eventually buy the Celtics.

Speaker 5 Yeah, I'm down. I mean, I know KG.

Speaker 5 KG was super, like, he was involved a few years ago and trying to, you know, in a group trying to get involved with the Timberwolves and was so fucking pissed when, you know, he got passed over or whatever.

Speaker 5 So he's at the top of the list. But yeah,

Speaker 5 I'm down to make a run. It just, we need to raise like six billion dollars, I think.

Speaker 1 I want it to be your group, though. I don't want you to join another group.
I want it to be Hank's group that he brings everyone together and then you get the sweat equity.

Speaker 1 So you don't even have to put a bunch bunch of money in you just you're the one who connected all these people yeah I'll raise 5.99999 billion and then I'll throw it and then throw down like 10k yeah yeah and then you'll dunk and you'll throw down 20 yeah

Speaker 1 talk to Dave I'm sure Dave would be down to get involved in the Hank Lockwood enterprise yeah Dave's Dave said he's he just he's 4.9 billion short it's so funny how like the levels to rich guy there is and like owning a a

Speaker 1 NBA or NFL franchise the levels to rich guy are just so obscene and out of this world that it's not even you know you could hank you could talk to

Speaker 5 a thousand people and it would still get you not even like one like ten thousandth of the way there the net worth of the entire and it's all celebrities and rich athletes and actors and stuff and i don't think you could combine all of their net worth and be like a fifth of the way there yeah that's crazy.

Speaker 5 Like Dave's the richest guy any of us know and he could liquidate all his assets and maybe own like one one thousandth of the team.

Speaker 6 That's why banks exist, Hank. You just go to a bank and ask them for a loan to buy the Celtics.
See what they say.

Speaker 5 I've heard rumors that they're going to, a casino is going to buy it and try and rebuild a stadium somewhere else, which would be the craziest move in the history of Boston.

Speaker 1 But would it be a casino stadium? Well,

Speaker 5 there already is a casino like, you know, in the Charleston, Everett area. So, like, yeah, probably.
But that would be moving it away from the garden would be bad, bad, bad.

Speaker 1 You kind of rushed somebody bought

Speaker 6 and then moved it out of Boston.

Speaker 1 Yeah, no, that'd be that would be bad. Wouldn't it be awesome, though, if someone actually made a casino stadium? So it was just like live tellers at your seat.

Speaker 1 You could play blackjack in the middle of timeouts and stuff. Isn't that the next wave? Yeah.

Speaker 3 Sounds like a bad sports town to me.

Speaker 3 This is actually the downfall of the Celtics, though, because they're just paying, this owner is just paying everyone a billion dollars and then he's like, someone else deal with it.

Speaker 1 Someone else with big money who doesn't actually care about

Speaker 1 max. You don't know, Matt.
You don't know how this is going. You don't know how this is going.

Speaker 5 Learn finance. Learn finance.
Learn assets. Learn fucking value.
Max they max.

Speaker 6 They locked up their long-term assets, okay?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 6 But it's also very relatable to just like spend a bunch of money on future contracts and then be like, yeah, I actually don't want to pay it.

Speaker 6 I just want to give them the giving them the contract is the fun part.

Speaker 1 And now you sell the team i guess you get all the credit you get the handshake and be like yeah i paid you that money but yeah max um unfortunately for you this take that you have right now you're lumped in with the darren revells of the world because he said the same thing

Speaker 1 i don't ever understand that why wouldn't you if you own if you're trying to buy a team and they're like hey Okay, yeah, $300 million to Jason Tatum and Jalen Brown, but you literally have your two best players locked up for the next whatever, five, six years.

Speaker 1 That's the team you want to buy.

Speaker 3 Learn value. Yeah, but there's like 20 of them.

Speaker 1 They're paying the whole team 200 million.

Speaker 5 Derek White has, I mean, shout out to Derek White. He re-signed on a fantastic deal.
I think Tyrus Maxi gets paid like $80 million more. He's not better.

Speaker 1 Paul George is 45.

Speaker 5 Did you see? Did you see? I saw one of those fun little graphics that was like Paul George's playoff numbers this year and Derek White's playoff numbers this year. Derek White cleared him by far.

Speaker 1 That is fun. Yeah, no, that's great.

Speaker 3 That's great.

Speaker 3 No, no. I'm excited.

Speaker 3 Get your celebration in now, Henry.

Speaker 1 I did. Celtics.
I've seen it. Celtics are high.

Speaker 1 He literally did. Yeah, no.
No,

Speaker 3 keep riding high, buddy.

Speaker 1 I will. Things are going downhill.
Okay. Things are going downhill.

Speaker 6 Championship, Hank. It's actually going to be not as good for you in a couple of years.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I like you guys sitting next to each other. It's a good vibe.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Other MAPS.

Speaker 6 I had a question actually for Max. Max, you're sitting next to Hank right now, who, by the way, still looks great with his hair growing back in.

Speaker 6 It's a crime that your punishment turned into something that you can actually use.

Speaker 1 Bald is beautiful, PFT.

Speaker 5 Join me.

Speaker 6 What if the Sixers win the championship next year with Paul George? You shave that head?

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yes. Okay.
Nice. Okay.
Nice. Nice.

Speaker 5 What about the play-in turn or whatever the fuck? The play in turn? mid-season.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 Soul patch. Soul patch.
No.

Speaker 1 Sideburns only.

Speaker 1 The other big news was Clay Thompson done with the Warriors, which we all knew. Now on the Mavs.

Speaker 1 I'm buying Clay Thompson stock. I feel like his ending at the Warriors was kind of sad, but I think he's going to be, I think you're going to get a rejuvenated Clay Thompson

Speaker 1 hitting wide open threes because Luca is going to take all the pressure off him. I know Steph obviously did the same, but I'm buying Clay Thompson.
I don't think this is the end of Clay Thompson.

Speaker 1 Everyone

Speaker 1 has written him off.

Speaker 1 I'm not going to write him off.

Speaker 6 Yeah, I mean, he's still a great catch and shoot shooter. He didn't do that well at the end of the season this year.
What did he finish? Like 0 for 10 in his last game?

Speaker 1 He had a bad last game. He's still shy, like 39% from 3.

Speaker 1 I also saw this awesome thread of a Warriors fan who I think most Warriors fans appreciate everything Clay Thompson did even though it got weird at the end and the guy he tore his he tore his acl and his achilles at like whatever it was you know 33 or something he he had catastrophic injuries that that definitely slowed him down but there was one there was a thread that had like all the highlights of clay thompson and one of them was clay thompson scores 60 points on 14 dribbles and that's maybe the coolest stat i've ever seen yeah i think we when we talked to kirk goldsbury one time we asked him about that he has the lowest dribble per point ratio in the NBA.

Speaker 6 He just catch and shoot, catch and shoot. And he'll be in a great spot for that in Dallas.
And it's funny because you're starting to see a little bit of like the post-mortem on Clay come out.

Speaker 6 I saw a report saying that

Speaker 6 he didn't get as much of the publicity like Draymond, but he was just as messy behind the scenes, but in his Clay Thompson way. I can guarantee that Clay Thompson was not as messy as Draymond Greene.

Speaker 6 There's somebody, probably Draymond is telling people in the media, like, actually, he's kind of a dick too because he didn't like me.

Speaker 6 But people are starting to, like, turn on Clay in the Bay Area. Not the team, but some of the fans are like, yeah, maybe

Speaker 6 he was kind of low-key in issue for us.

Speaker 5 That's just, that's poor sportsmanship, salty fandom.

Speaker 6 He won four championships.

Speaker 1 He won four championships. I actually think you could make the argument, and maybe we could do Mount Rushmore of it later this summer.

Speaker 1 I think you could make the argument that the Jordan Poole contract was the worst contract ever given out in all of sports, not just because of the money given to Jordan Poole, but what it did to the rest of the team.

Speaker 1 Because that was like Clay watching that, Draymond watching that. That feels like the point.
Obviously, they won a title still after that, but no, did they win the title?

Speaker 1 No, they gave it to him after they won the title, right?

Speaker 1 I care myself. I don't remember the year that they gave it to him.

Speaker 6 I do know it's a terrible contract.

Speaker 1 But it like screwed up the whole vibes of everything. Yeah, I think it was right around that.
I think it might have been the year of or the year directly after.

Speaker 1 But that might be the worst contract of all time.

Speaker 6 It's funny to say that he was almost as bad as Draymond. You just didn't hear about the stuff and the stuff that he did didn't make as big of like a splash as Draymond.
Yeah, no shit.

Speaker 6 That's because Draymond actually kind of lunatic. You don't need to lump Clay in there just because you're upset that he's leaving.
He gets a tribute video.

Speaker 1 They

Speaker 1 tribute video Clay.

Speaker 1 Yes, agreed. All right.
So it was 2021 was the year they won. and then he got his contract a year later, I believe.
So yeah, screwed up everything.

Speaker 1 Okay, I had two other stories I wanted to hit real quick, PFT.

Speaker 5 Wait, I have something quick on the Clay Thompson thing. I don't know if you guys have seen...

Speaker 5 I feel bad for him because he probably can't go on Instagram. The NBA Instagram, no matter what they post, because obviously, you know, they posted a bunch of Celtic stuff.

Speaker 5 See the posts, click in the comments. Every single post they have, it just says

Speaker 5 people forget.

Speaker 5 But But this, you know, reminds you of that Clay Thompson won 0 for 10 in the elimination game.

Speaker 5 That's every single comment on every single post is, don't forget that Clay Thompson won 0-10 in elimination game. You know what?

Speaker 1 You know what? I'll stand in front of Clay for this. People should change that and just say, people forget Big Cat bet the over on Clay Thompson's points in that game.

Speaker 1 That was, you know,

Speaker 1 I'll take the bullets for Clay. I put too much pressure on him.

Speaker 6 You know what it is? It's people just trying to relive the greatness of people forget the Golden State Warriors blew a 3-1 lead in the NBA Finals.

Speaker 1 You're absolutely right. That moment will come back.

Speaker 6 You're trying to make it happen again. Let it go.
It was great.

Speaker 1 You're trying to make Fetch happen. All right.
The other two stories I had. LeBron, as

Speaker 1 I don't think there's ever been a player that has held a franchise hostage more than LeBron has the Lakers hostage right now. And it's maybe my favorite

Speaker 1 ongoing thing that he's pretending that isn't existing. And

Speaker 1 listen,

Speaker 1 the LeBron sexuals are listening right now. I'm not saying anything against LeBron, the player.
He hired J.J.

Speaker 1 Reddick and said that he had nothing to do with it, even though he did a four-month interview about their basketball philosophy.

Speaker 1 He's drafted Bronnie, and now he's saying he'll take less money if they can sign someone good, which I don't even know what that means because it's up to LeBron.

Speaker 1 But it's just so fucking funny because he's got this. He basically is the Lakers.

Speaker 1 The once-proud Los Angeles Lakers are are just the LeBron Lakers at this point.

Speaker 6 It would rock if he just decided not to sign that contract extension and just signed somewhere else and made them draft his son.

Speaker 1 That's what I'm hoping happened.

Speaker 6 What does he mean? Like, we need to get another good player. How many good players are out there just waiting to be signed right now?

Speaker 1 Playoff P's gone. KCP's gone.
Maybe his other brother?

Speaker 6 Maybe his other son?

Speaker 1 The other son. Yeah, Donovan Mitchell just signed with the Cavs, which I think the Cavs had to do that.

Speaker 1 That's like a beware, though, of how these things always work out. I mean, the Bulls are

Speaker 1 showing it when they're trying to get rid of Zach Levine and they have to send a pick with him.

Speaker 1 So, yeah, I don't know what it means, but I just, I love the, I love the fact that he's holding everyone hostage here. Hank, what was that face?

Speaker 5 I ordered food in my fucking apartment. Oh, no.

Speaker 1 Oh, no. Damn it.

Speaker 6 I do that twice a week. It's no good.

Speaker 1 I do it all the time.

Speaker 1 I did it after we came back from beer games. I ordered three orders to the hotel we were staying at in Nashville.
I was like, why the fuck is this not getting delivered? They're scamming me.

Speaker 1 And then I realized I just kept on smashing reorder to the hotel we stayed at for one night.

Speaker 1 Yeah. So that was fun.

Speaker 6 Max, remember when you ordered all that Taco Bell to your girlfriend's place?

Speaker 3 Yeah, that was a good guy move by me.

Speaker 1 That was a good guy move.

Speaker 1 The last story I had was: Hank, would you like to we we touched on it very briefly before we went to break

Speaker 1 but the kyle filipowski story is crazy would you like to to talk about this at all hank as a as a noted duke fan i don't i don't even understand how duke was able to keep this under wraps the way they did for the last two years it's nuts well what does duke have to do with it it's a what do you mean there's a kyle filipowski problem no like he got he got groomed

Speaker 1 what

Speaker 5 My question is, what is Duke supposed to do about that? You're supposed to meddle in the lives of your players?

Speaker 5 People have all types of crazy family shit going on in every team.

Speaker 1 And do you think he told them?

Speaker 1 Do you think

Speaker 1 they knew everything?

Speaker 1 I think they knew everything. How?

Speaker 1 Because she's literally, it's pretty clear that she's there 100% of the time.

Speaker 5 Kyle Filpowski was in the office.

Speaker 1 Kyle Filipowski was in the office working out and she was there. I obviously didn't know the story.

Speaker 1 That was a crazy revelation i would have i would have i would have literally taken out a whistle and been like teed them both up and said hey duke do something i'm proud duke i think it's more that the family was telling duke about this because the family was trying was trying to get everyone to stop this and duke they were telling everyone what is duke supposed to do though like riddle me that letting grooming happen how

Speaker 1 just say stop and what if he says i love her which is obviously what he's saying no you you don't stop it you say then you say you don't you don't you don't love her and you're being you've been brainwashed right now yeah you don't know what stop is yeah hey stop it right now

Speaker 6 i do think i the internet as a whole shares some blame in this because the internet you have to you have to know this before draft day right you have to be on this the instagram posts they were public they've been up but it took the internet four years too long three years too long to figure this out and put it out there for us to see.

Speaker 6 I don't like that part of it. That shows that we're between that and the Clay Thompson thing.
We're slacking online right now. I'd like to see us step it back up.

Speaker 1 Well, I agree, PFT. It also could have easily been John Shire just saying, stop it right now.
And he never did that.

Speaker 1 His parents clearly did that. He clearly wasn't going to listen.

Speaker 1 Hank,

Speaker 1 they clearly didn't say it strong enough. They cared more about getting points and rebounds out of the guy than his own mental well-being.
The brotherhood means nothing.

Speaker 1 The brotherhood is essentially the brotherhood until you get groomed as a high schooler and then get snatched up and then have your girlfriend excommunicate your family. Then guess what?

Speaker 1 The brotherhood doesn't count. I thought the brotherhood counted for something.

Speaker 6 In my day, we used to say bros before hoes.

Speaker 6 It looks like that day's over.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah, but if you're not a Duke.
Everyone knows a guy that's

Speaker 1 caught up in in a relationship that everyone else knows that they shouldn't be in but they don't want to listen when he's when you're 17 and she's 26 hank

Speaker 5 i mean obviously i i is a is a uh uh muddy waters but it's like

Speaker 1 is it is it muddy or is it it's crystal clear

Speaker 5 it's fucked up by the girl it's grooming and it's not okay by what the girl did but when you're 17 hooking up with an older girl is cool fact or fiction Hank, Hank, this is now you're muddying those waters right now.

Speaker 1 No, I'm just saying like

Speaker 1 muddy.

Speaker 5 No, I'm saying it's wrong by her, but like from his perspective, it's like, yeah, like you don't, obviously he didn't realize he was being groomed, but like, again, it's like, you know, when

Speaker 5 teachers hook up with students, like,

Speaker 1 that's fucked up. No, I'm saying, I'm saying, I'm saying that is fucked up, but when you're a kid, like, wait, wait, you guys didn't want to hook up with any of your teachers when you were a kid?

Speaker 1 You guys weren't like, oh, my God, it'd be so cool.

Speaker 1 When our brains weren't developed, that's what I'm saying.

Speaker 5 His brain, it wasn't developed. I'm not, I'm saying everything that she did is wrong.
Groomer.

Speaker 5 But, like, again, whatever. It is what it is.

Speaker 3 Downfall of Hank starting now.

Speaker 1 Downfall. Hank.
Hey, Max got it right.

Speaker 5 All right. I'm done.

Speaker 5 Whatever. Cancel me.

Speaker 6 Well, Hank, I don't think you'd have any idea what it's like to hook up with a girl who's like nine years older than that.

Speaker 1 No, exactly.

Speaker 1 Hank, this is bad. The pleasure of the girls.
No, it's not. Shut up.
Bad spot. They didn't stop him.
They were at the office and you didn't do shit, big cat. If I had known, I would have taken him up.

Speaker 1 I already said that. So John Sire didn't know either.
Yes, he did. How do you know that? How do you know that? Because his family was asking him for help.
The girlfriend was everywhere.

Speaker 1 His family DM'd me instead. They DM'd you and you didn't do shit about it.
No, they didn't. They never DM'd me.
If they had DM'd me, I would have whistleblowed faster than you could.

Speaker 1 You think me, me, if I had a chance to take down Duke?

Speaker 5 They were in this office and you did nothing.

Speaker 1 I wish I had nothing.

Speaker 6 It's really, really sad.

Speaker 6 It's really sad that this unfortunate story is taking away from what should be the headline for cowboy

Speaker 1 which is the remarkable recovery that he made from his leg injury after they stormed a vote against him that's what we should be thought we should be celebrating modern medicine instead of having to having to go to to catchapredator.com to look at pictures of his girlfriend hank it's just really sad the brotherhood has let everyone down i just want any future duke guys to know that if you go there they're listening they all they care about is your points and rebounds they don't care about the human being.

Speaker 1 Fact.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we'll cut this.

Speaker 5 We'll cut this.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 1 Okay, let's do hot seat cool tarone.

Speaker 6 Hey, it's PFT here, reminding you that Boarshead makes game day entertaining elevated and effortless.

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Speaker 6 My favorites like oven gold turkey or blazing buffalo-style chicken, paired with their classic Vermont cheddar or creamy Munster cheese are sure to score big and help me elevate my entertainment every time Whether it's for a tailgate or a homegating celebration Seriously guys, it's a game-changing flavor for every gathering boarshead committed to craft since 1905

Speaker 5 Yeah, my hot I mean I wasn't gonna do this, but it is fresh fresh on my mind after that read max hot seat just ditching our playoff softball game for the Cubs games night.

Speaker 5 We're already like 10 men down. We're like scratching and clawing for everyone we have.
A lot of people are out of town. Fourth of July plans, it happens, but Max being in the city, it hurts.

Speaker 5 It hurts. It just hurts.
His heart. My hot seat is Max.

Speaker 6 Hank, isn't Max like the best player on your team?

Speaker 1 No. But we need him.

Speaker 3 You guys are bad sports town. You don't understand.
Hank, as a Celtics fan, as a Boston fan, when your team is...

Speaker 1 How many people are traveling to Chicago? How many games are you?

Speaker 1 I'm going to go to all of them. What? I'm not.
All three?

Speaker 3 Yeah, the team is in town. I asked Big Cat for the tickets weeks ago.
I was planning on not being here this week. So this was going to be, I'll go Tuesday and then leave Wednesday.

Speaker 3 I already asked Big Cat for the tickets. It would be rude to not take the tickets.

Speaker 1 No, you could.

Speaker 5 You can say there's a million people that would love to take them.

Speaker 1 You could send them back and go to the game. It would be rude

Speaker 3 to not take the tickets. Big Cat.

Speaker 1 I'm telling you right now, it's

Speaker 3 so graciously gifted them to me. All right.
He's just putting on right now. I know that he really wants me to go.
So I'm sorry.

Speaker 3 I love my sports teams.

Speaker 1 I would not have to go.

Speaker 5 Not on sports teams.

Speaker 1 I love Hugs.

Speaker 1 I love my sports teams. I love my sports teams.
He hits hits. He hates heat dogs.
He hates.

Speaker 6 It's interesting, yes.

Speaker 1 Is this team, who are you guys playing tonight? Do you have a tough game? Yeah.

Speaker 3 No, we beat this team 24-2 last time we played them.

Speaker 1 Oh, you're fine. You're fine, Hank.
I hope you're not. So, Max, why are you going to all the games?

Speaker 6 Why can't you miss just one game?

Speaker 3 Because I love the Phills. Sorry, I love the Phills.
And I saw them last night. It was super embarrassing.

Speaker 1 Wait. Oh, yeah.
What happened there?

Speaker 3 I just saw them on the riverwalk and I got excited. I was like, and I started clapping.
I was like, let's go, Phils, boys. And then I took like five steps back and I was like, why did I do that?

Speaker 3 That was so stupid.

Speaker 1 Why didn't you say? You should have just said, I have a podcast. No, no, that's way worse.
No, way worse.

Speaker 1 That's way worse. Come on.

Speaker 6 No, I do that all the time. You just walk down the street screaming at everybody.
I have a podcast.

Speaker 1 Ask me about my podcast.

Speaker 1 Okay, your cool throne, Hank?

Speaker 5 My cool throne is a Hoctua girl.

Speaker 1 Oh, I had that as well.

Speaker 5 She was in Nashville. She sung Revival on stage with Zach Bryan.
And she did an interview with Brie, our coworker, backstage that has like a million views, I think, in one day. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Also led us to one of the funniest exchanges on Twitter.

Speaker 1 Laura Loomer, who you're going to have to help me, PFT, what is she?

Speaker 6 I don't know. I don't know what she is.
She's on Twitter.

Speaker 1 She's a Twitter user. Okay.
All right. All right.
Oh, yeah. She's investigative journalism.

Speaker 1 She said, watch the degenerate Hoctua girl whose real name is Haley Welsh is anti-Trump. In her first interview since going viral, she was asked about Donald Trump.
She said, it's a no for me.

Speaker 1 Stop giving skanks attention. The girl was made famous for talking about spitting on a penis during oral sex.
She is not to be taken seriously.

Speaker 1 No self-respecting woman goes around talking about spitting on penises. She clearly is a moron and behaves like white trash.
Typical Biden supporter. Next.

Speaker 1 And then Bill Ackman replied, Laura, you got this one wrong. That was not the question.
She was asked, and I don't think you can determine her politics from the clip.

Speaker 1 You might want to review it again. And Laura Loomer responded, I stand corrected.

Speaker 1 Upon further review, it turns out that she was only talking about whether she would perform fellatio on President Trump. Her plans for election day remain unclear.

Speaker 6 Yeah, so we'll see. We're going to wait for all the facts to come out before determining whether or not she's good.
She has, I guarantee.

Speaker 1 Well, the segment from Bri, like, we should maybe incorporate that into the show over the last week.

Speaker 6 Just because every girl wants to be like, well, I saw the video. I got to try the Hawk Tua.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I goes, Hawk Tua or no.
That was the segment. That's great.
Would you blow this person or not?

Speaker 1 And it's a no from me for President Trump. And And then people are like, this is crazy.

Speaker 1 She's a liberal.

Speaker 1 Oh, man.

Speaker 1 Actually, it's very classy of her to be like, no, I wouldn't hawk to a president.

Speaker 1 That's a nice thing to do.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he's a married man. Yeah.
She leaves the office.

Speaker 1 That's also a lit move, right?

Speaker 5 That's what the Dems do.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.
All right. PFT.
Hawk Tour the President.

Speaker 1 I don't know if there's... Yeah, I guess Monica Lewinsky is hawked.
Reagan? The only proof of Hawk 2 against Reagan. Reagan was a great Hawk 2.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's a big question that the internet should debate. Is Hawk 2

Speaker 1 a lib or a Republican move?

Speaker 1 It's whoa.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Okay, PFT, your hot seat cool thrown.

Speaker 6 My hot seat is Greg Berhalter, coach of the U.S. men's national team.
We put him on the hot seat, it feels like months ago. It feels like years ago.
It feels like two years ago. He's on the hot seat.

Speaker 6 But the USA, they lost to Uruguay, won nothing. They're out of the Copa America.
They were the host country. They had the, what's the opposite of the group of death?

Speaker 6 Whatever that is, that's what we were in. And we stunk.
We sucked.

Speaker 6 Our players didn't play that well, but our coaching stunk. And so now he's got to be fired.
We got to fire Greg.

Speaker 1 Wasn't it time?

Speaker 6 If we're not going to fire him now, just might as well give up on the World Cup.

Speaker 1 I have a question for you, PFT. Now, I agree that Greg Berhalter should be fired, and I don't really have any basis besides everyone else's saying it.
So I'm like, fine, fuck it.

Speaker 1 If there's a picket for,

Speaker 1 you know,

Speaker 1 if we're all grabbing our pitchforks for a coach, I'm in.

Speaker 1 Is there a chance we just suck at soccer?

Speaker 6 We shouldn't, though. Yes, right now we do suck.
Yes, at this moment, we suck at soccer, but our players are good. They play on the best teams in the world.

Speaker 1 Okay, but I was watching that whole game last night, and

Speaker 1 we had to win, and we basically just didn't try to score um we looked like

Speaker 1 again this could be burr halter but then

Speaker 1 i i was looking it up today essentially u.s men's soccer team has told everyone this is a golden generation because we can beat mexico we don't beat anyone else we just beat mexico and mexico kind of stinks now

Speaker 1 So that's the bar for it's been the bar for U.S.

Speaker 6 soccer for a long time. It's like, if you can dominate your rival, then it's all good.

Speaker 6 If you can beat them in important games, then it feels like you've got a good team, which is a decent thing to have as like your mark of whether or not your team's good if Mexico is good, but Mexico hasn't been good.

Speaker 6 Right. Beating them, it's not the same as it used to be.

Speaker 6 So yeah, he's been skating by basically on having teams that can only, you know, they made it out of the World Cup group, which was nice, I guess.

Speaker 6 You kind of had to do that. We did win that 0-0 draw against England, which was huge for us.
And then we won the 1-1 draw against Brazil, which is also massive.

Speaker 6 But besides those two wins that were actually draws, Greg hasn't done shit except beat Mexico. That's the only thing that he does.

Speaker 1 The players.

Speaker 1 But the players, too, have to take some onus. No, the, the, I saw

Speaker 1 Justin Moran tweeted out that

Speaker 1 in the last six years, five years, if you take out our wins against Mexico, the best win that the U.S. men's national team has is over Iran.
1-0.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 We stink. We don't score goals.
We also just don't score goals. It's like, it's also just a terrible product to watch.
We don't score goals and we don't even create chances to score goals.

Speaker 6 Yeah, we're not aggressive enough.

Speaker 6 We put in an extra defender when we lost a guy to a red card because we were just trying to get a tie. We love playing for ties and it's bullshit and it sucks.

Speaker 6 And it takes the fun out of watching sports when the team that you cheer for doesn't even try to score. And in the game last night, did you see what Greg did?

Speaker 6 He was watching the score of the Bolivia-Panama game and telling the guys on the field, like, hey, their score is 1-1 right now. We're okay.
Play for a draw. That's loser talk.
That's loser mentality.

Speaker 1 Greg needs to be out. I don't know who we can get.

Speaker 6 I've heard people say, Klopp, he's good.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we'd have to pay him a ton of money.

Speaker 6 Good. Pay him, pay him all the money.

Speaker 6 Also, I thought about maybe getting that German coach. Remember the one that used to stick his hand down his pants and smell it on the sidelines? Remember that dude?

Speaker 5 Yeah.

Speaker 6 He was cool. The German coach, the one who would eat his own boogers on the sidelines.
I'll take him. I'll take the booger eater.

Speaker 1 I don't know. I just, I'm starting to think that

Speaker 1 as bad as Burr Halter is, again, everyone has told me he's terrible. So I'll agree with everyone on this because I don't know enough about soccer.
At some point, it's also the players, no?

Speaker 6 Yeah, they haven't played well as a team at all.

Speaker 1 But that's the thing.

Speaker 6 Like, they are good players who play on good teams overseas.

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 1 if they were good, we would win. Yeah.
If they were good, we'd beat Panama.

Speaker 6 No, you can have a good team. You can have a team of good players that suck playing as a team.

Speaker 1 But I don't know how good are the players. I feel like everyone just tells us that this is the best players that we've ever had.

Speaker 1 And yet, if you look at it, it's like 20 years ago we, or 30 years ago, we accomplished way more

Speaker 6 so that the players that we have right now are playing at a higher level internationally than we've ever had before in this country and that's not you can't really debate that because it's just a fact but the team the u.s team they suck ass they stink

Speaker 6 and they're all taking they're taking responsibility yeah i'm just uh i i'm i'm more just i i want burr halter out but maybe we stink at soccer story developing we do right yes right now right now we do stink at soccer but we have good players and that's what makes it so frustrating is like the world cup in two years should be awesome it should be so much fun for u.s fans and and bandwagon fans that's the best time to join the bandwagons of the world cup and just blindly support your your country but it's going to suck if we have a team that's good on paper and can't do shit like this was the easiest draw for us we still couldn't do anything with it yeah i just i keep getting stuck on like the on paper and then as a team they just never have done anything

Speaker 6 Well, yeah, they're they're a young team so they've only played

Speaker 5 like what have we done anything we win these random ass fucking we got it we got

Speaker 5 cups in like yeah we beat Mexico

Speaker 1 we beat Mexico that's it we just beat Mexico

Speaker 6 consistently and we beat teams by tying them that's what that's what this iteration of the team has done

Speaker 6 they're good players but they suck it they suck right now the team sucks there's no, you can't sugarcoat that. U.S.
soccer sucks ass right now.

Speaker 1 Okay. Your cool throne?

Speaker 6 My cool throne is just dads asking if those are gunshots or fireworks.

Speaker 1 I like that. Big week for that.

Speaker 6 Yeah. Huge week for that.
You're going to hear a lot of pops, and you're going to get a lot of dads being like, was that gunshots? No, it's fireworks. It's the 4th of July.

Speaker 7 Yeah.

Speaker 1 That is a fun. a little fun wrinkle that we have coming up.
All right. My hot seat is something that we have all kind of forgotten, but it's going to happen on Thursday.

Speaker 1 America's on the hot seat because it just dawned on me again that Joey Chestnut's not competing. That fucking sucks.

Speaker 6 Yeah. And it's not going to hit the same.
I know he's doing the competition against Kobayashi, but I need that on the 4th.

Speaker 1 I think he's doing one on the 4th against some troops.

Speaker 1 It just, I'm going to wake up on the 4th.

Speaker 1 I just want to give everyone like a pre-warning because the big news happened, what, three weeks ago. And now we're right on the cusp of the 4th of July, one of the best holidays we have.

Speaker 1 And one of the things that makes it the best holidays is just not going to be there. And I think we all just need to be like ready for it because it's going to suck beyond belief.

Speaker 6 Yeah,

Speaker 6 you know, it would be awesome if the Hawk Tour competed in the Nathan's hot dog eating contest.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 6 That would add a fun little wrinkle to it. Or just spit on the hot dogs before you eat them.
See if it works then.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay. My cool throne is: I have two.
Real quick, I just want to say

Speaker 1 it's it's early, but I actually think the Bulls and the Blackhawks are both doing good things because they're actually coming to grips with the fact that they're not competing for championships and making the correct moves.

Speaker 1 The Blackhawks signed a bunch of guys on a one-year deal to try to get competitive and then not lock anyone up for a long term, build around the young core.

Speaker 1 And the Bulls are trying to get rid of Zach Levine, not going to re-sign DeMar DeRosan, who I love,

Speaker 1 but maybe there's actually some hope. This will all probably blow up in my face because

Speaker 1 there is, you know, it's still Jerry Rheinsdorf who is going to be like, hey, I want to win 40 games and get to the play-in. Let's figure out a way.
They fucked up so bad.

Speaker 1 Andre Drummond went to the Sixers. They could have traded him for picks at the deadline.
Caruso, same thing. Both guys

Speaker 1 gone from the team. And then my other cool throne is, did you guys see this guy on PowerSlap named, I think his name is Butterball? Is that his name? Butterball.

Speaker 1 He's this little short guy who just finally came over to America and he just kicks the shit out of guys in PowerSlap. Slap.

Speaker 1 I don't know. PowerSlap, it's a weird sport, but I think this guy has the it factor.

Speaker 6 Yeah, so PowerSlap, to my knowledge, it only exists as clips that we watch online. I've never seen a stream of PowerSlap.
I can't imagine going to a PowerSlap event sober.

Speaker 6 That to me seems like that would be just a crazy thing to do.

Speaker 1 It's like going to dark sober but uh i like the clips the clips are fun yeah the clips are very very fun uh what is this guy's name oh no dumpling his name's dumpling siberian farmer named dumpling

Speaker 1 i don't know why i said butter i was thinking butter bean uh and i guess because he's shorter he's got an advantage so pft this might be your sport Because I guess when you're going, when you're going up on someone, it's easier to concuss them than when you're slapping down on someone so if somebody's slapping down on me it's easier for me to absorb that blow correct and and dumpling never been knocked out yeah dumpling is able to to slap up and just knock dudes out

Speaker 6 i might have pretty good shot pretty awesome um okay maybe we do that live stream how power slap the uh two guys that finish in last place in mount rushmore

Speaker 1 i don't hate that we're gonna bring mount rushmore back on monday um Like I said, we're on vacation this week. Thank you, everyone, who tuned in on Monday for Dungeons and Dragons.

Speaker 1 We love doing those shows. Do them a couple of times a year.
But yeah, this is our one kind of vacation week of the year.

Speaker 1 So there's no show Friday. We're back on Monday in studio with Joe Burrow and Mount Rushmore.

Speaker 1 Let's, though, kick it to ourselves. We have Gunner Henderson and our dingers-only draft, which listen, if you're a seam head, prepare to get triggered because,

Speaker 1 yeah, we will trigger some people. But we know ball now.
And the league is going to officially start on July 4th. That's when the home runs start counting.

Speaker 6 And the Dingers-only League was meant to make us to force us to start watching ball in these early days of the season. And you know what?

Speaker 6 It was better than last time. It was a better draft than last year's.

Speaker 1 It was. And we're Jerry.
Jerry's a huge piece of shit.

Speaker 3 Jerry's a huge piece of shit for all Phillies fans out there. Jerry's a huge piece of shit.

Speaker 1 Oh, okay. Well, let's kick it to ourselves.

Speaker 1 Okay, we now welcome on a very special guest. So we are about to draft our Dingers-only league, and we thought, why not have one of the best home run hitters in all of baseball on the show?

Speaker 1 It is Baltimore Orioles shortstop. Phenom,

Speaker 1 my personal pick for MVP. Best friends with Stephen Shea, Gunner Henderson.
Gunner, thank you for joining us.

Speaker 1 Let's start here. We're going to draft these teams for the Dingers-only league.

Speaker 1 Do you want to make your pitch to everyone who's going to be drafting on why you should be a high draft pick in a league that only counts home runs?

Speaker 7 Yeah, I mean, shoot, I'm at the ballpark every day. I'm trying to put in the work

Speaker 7 to put on for the Dingro League. I've heard that it's a very prestigious league.
So honored to be considered part of it. And, you know,

Speaker 7 yeah, just trying to do my part to help whoever gets me picked. So, just know you're getting 110% effort.

Speaker 6 I like that. Humility is important for me when I'm selecting my team.
Another thing that's very important for me personally is each person's walk-up song when they come up to the play.

Speaker 6 I want to know that my guy is stepping up there with the blood pumping,

Speaker 6 heart rate going, preferably a good, nice, clean rock and roll song, old school. So, I need to know what's your walk-up song.

Speaker 7 Yeah, I did have a rock and roll song. It was Kickstar My Heart last year, but I've transitioned into The Sweet Escape by Gwen Stefani, and it gets the crowd going.

Speaker 7 You get to hear them cheering on. So,

Speaker 7 yeah, I do enjoy my rock and roll, but this one seems to get the crowd involved.

Speaker 1 I like that one. Gwen Stefani, you can never go wrong with her.
How about this, Gunner? Let's say situational baseball.

Speaker 1 It's late in the game, and you got first and second, and you may be doing a hit and run, and that's called in, and

Speaker 1 you're just trying to get some contact, get the guys moving over. Will you, in the back of your head, be like, but

Speaker 1 Big Cat drafted me in Dingers only, and we need a long ball here? What kind of commitment are you going to give pitch me to draft you?

Speaker 7 I mean,

Speaker 1 I have it.

Speaker 7 The hit and run is a, all you got to do is put the bat on the ball, but it didn't say that it had to be not in the air. So

Speaker 7 that's my take.

Speaker 6 Okay. Now, what about if it's a 3-0 count and you got the green light and a pitch comes in,

Speaker 6 let's say the pitcher grooves a fastball, but it's up in the zone. It's looking like it might be ball four, but you know that you can hit the shit out of it.
Are you still going to take a cut?

Speaker 7 If I got the green light,

Speaker 7 I'm going to let something rip at it.

Speaker 6 Okay. All right.
I appreciate that.

Speaker 6 How much do you hate getting walked?

Speaker 7 Yeah, I've seen the videos where people think that I really hate walking, but I actually really enjoy walking. So

Speaker 7 I know that doesn't suit the Dingers-only league, but

Speaker 7 yeah, I do enjoy walking a little to help the guy behind me get some RBIs.

Speaker 1 You're lying because we have seen the videos, and you throw your bat in disgust, and you're upset that you're walking. I like that.
You're up there to hit. So you like, I know that it's good.

Speaker 1 A walk is as good as a hit. That's what they say.
But you want to hit, right?

Speaker 7 Yeah, I mean, going up there, wanting to do some damage. but uh

Speaker 7 yeah i guess i guess walks are just as good as hits so um

Speaker 7 i mean obviously i guess your 1-1 position is to get a hit but if they don't throw your strike then don't don't strike out and chase stuff so yeah i think i think in theory you understand that walks are good but as it's happening to you you're like i really wish i could have hit a tater yeah i mean uh obviously it like i said a hit a hit is obviously the one one uh scenario but um i guess walks come with uh come with the game as well so what's the farthest home run that you've ever hit

Speaker 7 I think it was last year, the one on Utah. I made it to Utah Street.
It was my first one ever. I think it was like 462.
That's pretty good. That's what they said.

Speaker 9 It's pretty good. Yeah.
Pretty good.

Speaker 1 What's your favorite home run you've ever hit?

Speaker 7 Ooh, favorite one.

Speaker 7 So I have one later in the game against the Rockies last year,

Speaker 7 left on left. I think it put us up by one in the bottom of the eighth, like two outs, I want to say.
So that one's up there.

Speaker 1 And then my first career grand slam was uh that one's up there too okay uh wrong answer it was the next one your next one's your favorite home run and you keep saying the next one and the next one how many wait how many multi-home run games do you have in your career do you have any yeah i have one

Speaker 7 in houston okay and then i know i have one in new york last year okay

Speaker 7 After this Dinger League draft, hopefully a couple more.

Speaker 7 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Good answer. I like that a lot.
This feels good. We should interview every player.

Speaker 7 have you have you ever hit the warehouse in batting practice uh no i have not not made it that far yet but i'm still getting there are you more of a cat person or a dog person oh i'm 100 more of a dog person all right good answer good answer how do you feel about the name gunner do you like it i feel like gunner is a good dinger name yeah i feel like that's uh that would be out there in the uh the dinger league draft of names yeah

Speaker 1 i'm hoping that'll uh that'll put me over the top for uh if you have any split decisions what about other guys on your team because so the dinger only league how it works is we have to have one guy from every position pitch us on someone else that you think might have a hot second half because the dingers only league we start it in july so the first half of the season doesn't count so it's just every every dinger after like july 4th uh who do you think is gonna be having a big second half okay so uh i got one for you first baseman ron mountcastle he's uh nope nope he got dizzy last year i had him on my team.

Speaker 1 He couldn't stop getting dizzy.

Speaker 7 Oh, no.

Speaker 7 He seems to be over the vertigo. But yeah, he does hit a lot of homers.
So

Speaker 7 he's been saving them. This is what he told me.
He's been saving them for the second half. Okay.
And I got him having a big second half.

Speaker 6 Okay.

Speaker 6 He got over the vertigo.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I just remember getting updates like every couple days like Ryan Mountcastle still dizzy. And I was like, God damn it.
I drafted this.

Speaker 6 Ryan Mountcastle, probably no longer dizzy. Yeah.

Speaker 1 All right, but I might give him a shot. I might give him another shot.

Speaker 1 That's a good one.

Speaker 1 What about Colton?

Speaker 1 Should we take a look? Late-round pick?

Speaker 7 Yeah. I mean,

Speaker 7 go with what your heart tells you. I mean,

Speaker 7 he's a streaky home run hitter, so he's going to give you at least a good. I would say he gets

Speaker 7 pretty close to 20, 25 homers this year. So

Speaker 1 he's going to have a big, big second half. Okay.
I have a question about your actual owner.

Speaker 6 Have you seen his copy of the Magna Carta that he owns?

Speaker 7 I have not.

Speaker 6 Did you know that he owned the Magna Carta?

Speaker 7 I did not. That is news to me.

Speaker 1 That's pretty sick.

Speaker 6 That's like the most baller thing you can do.

Speaker 1 It's like, I own the law.

Speaker 7 That is freaking sweet.

Speaker 6 Yeah, would you have any problems playing for an owner that didn't own the Magna Carta?

Speaker 7 I wouldn't say I have a problem with them not having it, but it is pretty baller status to it.

Speaker 6 Okay, because I don't have it yet.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 6 Can we expect a full injury?

Speaker 7 If we get it, then we'll talk.

Speaker 6 Can we expect full injury reports from you if we draft you to be on our team?

Speaker 7 Yeah, I mean, all inclusiveness here.

Speaker 1 Oh, I love that. All right, so, Gunner, we have

Speaker 1 Ebo here, who's a die-hard Orioles fan. He was not in the office when you came in the office.
He's basically been sad since. So, I said, come in here.
You get a question for Gunner.

Speaker 1 So, Ebo, take it away.

Speaker 10 What's up, Gunner? I just want to say, first off, you're the man.

Speaker 1 Nice, nice question.

Speaker 10 Yeah, you're the man.

Speaker 10 I've been following you since you were in Norfolk, and I've heard from some people in Norfolk that

Speaker 10 you were the best basketball player in Major League Baseball. You were an unbelievable basketball player, Alabama State Player of the Year.

Speaker 1 Whoa.

Speaker 10 Could you have gone D1?

Speaker 10 And if you had gone D1, where would you have played Division I basketball?

Speaker 1 Good excellent question.

Speaker 7 So I would like to thank just my competitive nature that I could have gone and played D1 basketball.

Speaker 7 If I put as much time and effort as I did into baseball, into basketball, I feel like I had a really good chance of doing that. And

Speaker 7 being an Auburn fan, I would have loved to go to the Auburn tigers and play basketball there okay bruce pearl getting all sweat you got any other questions for him um can you win mvp this year and can we win a world series yeah world series first and then uh maybe the mvp will come with it good answer all right

Speaker 1 we also have steven che in here has steven bothered you at all because he has your number um has he has he been okay with that what's up buddy no the i think the last pick we had was when uh tommy smokes got on got on to me and then uh che had my back yeah we i hit him in the balls for you yeah i i did i i i smacked his

Speaker 11 server yeah yeah because that was bullshit tommy smokes said he wanted gunner writhing in pain uh after aaron judge got hit it's disgusting disgusting we don't root for injuries no and we root for gunner yep yeah um okay i have one last question i know you got a meeting the pro football football show is presented by the chevy silverado built for the hustle ready for the game chevy silverado is america's most dependable full-size truck whether you're grinding through the week or gearing up for kickoff the silverado is one ride that's always game ready.

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Speaker 1 What's a meeting for a baseball player?

Speaker 7 So this one is our hitters' events. We're about to go over the pitcher, kind of

Speaker 7 what his arsenal is, what he tries to throw, and how it stacks up against the lefties versus righties and stuff and kind of get our mind ready for the game.

Speaker 1 Oh, that's interesting.

Speaker 6 Yeah, I would have no idea either what a meeting would be. How long? Do you watch film in that, or is it just like here are the numbers?

Speaker 7 Yeah, so we'll kind of watch how the pitches are moving, and then

Speaker 7 we'll watch some, how other hitters have had success off of him. And then, yeah, it only lasts probably 10 minutes, 10, 15 minutes.

Speaker 1 Okay. All right.
Perfect. Because I was going to say,

Speaker 1 when we start the draft, whoever drafts you, I'll have Stephen Che give you a call so that person can invite you to the team officially.

Speaker 7 Okay. Yeah.

Speaker 7 But within the next 30 to 45 minutes, I might be at BP, but We'll wait. I'll make sure to return the call.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah. Text when you're out of BP.
We'll wait, and then we'll just

Speaker 1 have the person invite you to the team to make it official.

Speaker 1 Perfect. Okay.
Okay.

Speaker 6 You made a compelling case. Yeah.
I've moved you up a couple spots in my big board. Yeah.

Speaker 1 No red flags, right?

Speaker 6 No red flags.

Speaker 7 No red flags on this end.

Speaker 1 Well, just one red flag.

Speaker 1 You somehow like Stephen Che. That's a red flag.

Speaker 1 That's a huge red flag.

Speaker 7 I do like Che, but at the same time,

Speaker 7 I came in last on the gauntlet because of the sporkle. So then I was forced to my number.

Speaker 1 That's good, though.

Speaker 1 That's good, though.

Speaker 6 I want my hitters dumb.

Speaker 6 I don't want you overthinking anything.

Speaker 1 What was it? Yeah, was it vowels that tripped you up? You didn't know what a vowel was?

Speaker 7 No, it was a lot of like

Speaker 7 80s mafia movies.

Speaker 7 I didn't really have one specific topic that I could just reel off like five or six answers to get me going.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.
but that's good. Yeah, it's sea ball, hitball.
That's Gunner Hunters. Yeah, that's it.
That's it. Let's keep it.
Let's keep this simple.

Speaker 1 All right, Gunner, thank you so much, and we'll let you know in a little bit who

Speaker 1 has you on your team.

Speaker 7 Perfect.

Speaker 1 Thank you guys for having me on.

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Speaker 1 Okay, welcome in. It is time.

Speaker 1 It is the 2024 Dingers Only league. We are ready to draft.
We are ready to learn about baseball. Just as a reminder for everyone,

Speaker 1 we do this when July 4th happens. That's when baseball season starts for us.
And we are going to draft one player from each position, including DH. And the only statistic is Dingers.

Speaker 6 Dingers.

Speaker 1 It's the

Speaker 1 easiest fantasy league to follow. Taters.
The start date will be July 4th, our nation's Independence Day. And this year, we have very special guests.
We have Brandon Walker and Jersey Jerry. Let's go.

Speaker 1 Let's do this. Competing in the Dingers-only League.
We also have Stephen Che as the commissioner, nerd on staff. He's already asked me questions.

Speaker 1 Boys,

Speaker 1 how are we feeling?

Speaker 6 I'm feeling great. I'm feeling slightly perturbed, disturbed.
You say why. Upset because Hank stole my prep sheet before we got started here.
Holding it.

Speaker 6 He's also stealing my look wearing the sunglasses, which I will note are not sponsored sunglasses. They're from

Speaker 6 brand, which is interesting.

Speaker 1 I'm wearing my shield rays. But that's not a dirty move.
They haven't even showed me the

Speaker 1 sunglasses on. Oh, you took them off?

Speaker 1 I liked Hank in the sunglasses. Oh, no.

Speaker 6 No, sunglasses indoors, guys. Not a good look right now.
Dr. Disrespect kind of ruined it for everybody.

Speaker 1 Brandon, is this your first time on part of my ticket? This is my first time ever on part of my ticket. Wow, welcome to the show, Brandon.
Thank you.

Speaker 1 That's I get to watch every fall when you have just lesser college football guys on your fucking show all the time. Oh,

Speaker 1 excuse me. Now I'm here.
Who would be the lesser? Oh, you know. No, I don't.
Fuck you, Fornelly. Oh, no.
Fornelly can run somebody. No, fuck

Speaker 1 you. Fuck Fornelly.
I'm here to go. We can kick you out of this league right now.
We think about that, Hank. Fuck Fornelly.

Speaker 1 Are we taping this early enough that we could AI Tom's voice over everything Tom Brandon opens his mouth? That doesn't seem right. I just got the invite.
I think, you know what?

Speaker 6 I like Fornelly's chances this year for being the number one college football personality. Yep.
He had a really, really strong year last year.

Speaker 6 Chance.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Can't go back to the past.

Speaker 1 Jerry, how are you feeling? Good. Punishment is.
The same as last year. Against the same team?

Speaker 1 I would assume the same team unless

Speaker 1 Northwestern can get us.

Speaker 1 Yeah. But we're open to doing a UIC again because they were so great to us.

Speaker 6 I would like to have somebody whoever loses, they should have to step up to the plate and bat a little bit next year, too.

Speaker 1 Yeah, well, I like that. I think we'll do, so I think the punishment will be the same: that it's the loser of this league will have to get six outs against a college baseball team.

Speaker 1 I also think that they're going to have to get an additional three outs against the rest of this league. I think that's fair.
That's cool. So, nine outs?

Speaker 1 Yeah, nine outs. Who's rip-ass? No, it's the chair.
So, six against the college team, and then a one-inning against all of us. Yes, what about Dan?

Speaker 1 What about one hit against their team, the college team? He has to stand in the box. One hit.
Second place.

Speaker 1 Deal. Second place has to stand in the box against one of their pitchers.
I like that.

Speaker 3 I'm gunning for second place.

Speaker 1 Oh, you're going to take him a yard? I mean,

Speaker 3 that sounds like a reward.

Speaker 1 Well, second place should be kind of a reward.

Speaker 6 Yeah, second place sounds fun to me. Yeah.
It really does.

Speaker 1 Second place gets a chance to bat

Speaker 1 against their best pitcher.

Speaker 6 I also think Max should not be allowed to play center field.

Speaker 1 He's too good.

Speaker 1 He is pretty good. No, that was fun.

Speaker 6 You were chasing down balls last time.

Speaker 1 That was fun.

Speaker 1 That was fun.

Speaker 1 And then fifth place has to catch. Oh, ooh.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Deal.
Fifth place has to catch.

Speaker 5 Didn't you just volunteer to catch last time, though?

Speaker 1 Well, we thought it would be better for the video, but we have six of the most electric personalities in Sports Entertainment here. Certainly the final.
And Brandon Walker. It's wonderful.

Speaker 1 I should have known. I was counting Stephen Shea.
That was a big mistake on my part.

Speaker 1 Guard Guard was down early. Fuck's legend.
Didn't let me finish. Nope.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 So, rules, very simple. Like I said, dingers only.
You have to have one position, every single player,

Speaker 1 including D.H. So you're going to get 10 guys on your team.
Or, no, nine guys on your team. I'm an idiot because pitchers don't hit anymore.

Speaker 1 There also are a couple other rules we should say right now.

Speaker 1 During the course of the season, you get one singular ad drop for injury or pedophilia. Pedophilia rule was because I had Wander Franco on my team last year and I dropped him, alleged.

Speaker 1 So you get one. So if you have two guys go out for the year injured,

Speaker 1 you can't replace both of them. Gotcha.
Does sexual assault fall under pedophilia, or are you just out of luck if that happens? I think we'll go case-by-case basis.

Speaker 6 Also, you don't have to drop them for pedophilia. We just, Big Cat decided

Speaker 6 last year to make a statement. If you don't feel like,

Speaker 6 I don't know, if you're on that side of the fence, that's your call.

Speaker 1 I let the record show I dropped him before the Rays did. You took the high ground.

Speaker 1 I acted quick, swiftly.

Speaker 6 Big cats sent him right back to the minors. Yep.
That's a bad choice.

Speaker 1 Okay, so and the beauty of this league is you don't have to update your roster. You just literally draft it and then it just goes.
So it's nice.

Speaker 1 There's no maintenance.

Speaker 1 What did we say about the injuries? It has to be a season ending.

Speaker 6 Season ending, you're allowed to replace them. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And then

Speaker 1 only one guy, though.

Speaker 3 Yeah, just one guy. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And so if you're injured for 15 days.

Speaker 3 No, it doesn't matter.

Speaker 1 You could use zero replacement there, couldn't you?

Speaker 6 No. No.

Speaker 1 No. But if you replace him, the first guy's gone, right?

Speaker 6 Season ending surgery or season ending injury.

Speaker 6 I think we should replace him.

Speaker 1 But wouldn't it make sense if you did... If you did 15-day DL, you can take the risk, but then...

Speaker 1 Like, you don't get him back.

Speaker 6 I think that has to factor into your calculus on who you draft is you don't want a guy that's made out of glass. Like, if Joel and Bi was in this draft, I would not take it.

Speaker 3 We're not talking about basketball.

Speaker 1 That's true. I'm not.

Speaker 6 Oh, Max, I wasn't even.

Speaker 1 You were talking about basketball.

Speaker 6 That was not about you, though. I was talking about

Speaker 6 basketball. I was using an example in baseball.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 And he actually wasn't talking about basketball. He happens to be a basketball player.
He's just saying he's made of glass.

Speaker 6 He's a human being.

Speaker 1 Right. First.

Speaker 1 You probably don't see it that way, do you? What are you playing a game on your phone?

Speaker 3 No, I'm worried about the whole list thing, so I'm trying to figure out an efficient way that I can be organized.

Speaker 6 Where are your fingernails painted, Max?

Speaker 1 We can talk about that later. Okay.

Speaker 1 So, Steven, if anyone drafts a duplicate player

Speaker 1 or a player who's already out for the year

Speaker 1 or a duplicate position, their pick automatically goes to the end of that round.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Brandon.

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 1 is the DH just somebody at a duplicate position or does he have to play the position of DH?

Speaker 1 That was my question

Speaker 1 i think that should be any position it should be any position so i could draft two first basemen right to flex for all no no it has to be a dh it has to be majority yeah i think it has to be a dh yeah he could he could play a couple like some dhs play a couple days in the field a week but their majority position has to be dh okay

Speaker 1 Gotta find out who plays DH.

Speaker 1 This is going exactly how it went last year, which is great. I did assume you guys had everything figured out when I got here.
No, not at all. Not at all.
My bad. No, no, no.

Speaker 6 I just wanted to be a little bit better than last year, which is not a very hard bar to clear out.

Speaker 1 Last year was a debacle.

Speaker 1 We basically did this entire league just so that we could learn some names of baseball players. Did it work? Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 6 Also, what we did afterwards, there's a way to set up alerts on your phone so that when your guy hits a home run, you get a notification.

Speaker 6 I don't know how to turn that off, so I'm just going to be getting notifications from guys that were on my team from last year.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Oh, I'm not going to.
Whenever you try to draft your same team,

Speaker 6 yeah, it came in last place, but that's only because it got fucked by Jordan Alvarez. And we had a great second half of the season.

Speaker 1 We had the dumbest rule last year where we had hit by pitch is 10 points, and that screwed up everything. Who ended up winning? Was it Max? Did you win? Shane? Shane won.

Speaker 1 I think he had a guy get hit by a pitch like eight days in a row.

Speaker 3 Oh, wait, no, I did end up winning because my guy led the league and hit by pitch. It was unbelievable.

Speaker 1 It just completely ruined the idea of dingers only.

Speaker 1 Okay, so now we have to figure out draft order. Was there a pitcher tiebreaker this year or no? Oh, yes.
Yes. There is.
Good point.

Speaker 6 You have most strikeouts? Yes.

Speaker 1 So after we have finished drafting every position, we will then draft pitchers, one pitcher each, that is solely for tiebreakers, and that'll be total strikeouts. Got it.
Gone.

Speaker 1 And that strikeouts also includes what's already been done. So you could just pick whoever has the most strikeouts.
Right now. Okay.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 And the only thing that matters is standings at the end of the season. Correct.
Okay. Correct.
Cool. Correct.
Cool. Okay.
How should we do the draft order?

Speaker 1 Wheel, right? Do we have a wheel?

Speaker 1 Can they do the wheel? Does the wheel exist on this show? I don't know. We've never had a wheel yet.

Speaker 6 Where's your ball machine? Number generator.

Speaker 1 We could do number generator. We could do...
We can do the Chicago Dog Walk draft style. I'd think of a number, and you guys all guess it.
Ooh. I like that.
Or we could do Jeopardy.

Speaker 1 Oh, you can do that if you want.

Speaker 6 What's that?

Speaker 1 Oh, it's the worst game ever.

Speaker 6 Well, yeah, let's do that.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Celebrity or like actual Jeopardy? We do celebrity. Guys, this could be hours.

Speaker 1 It might take a long time. Okay, so let's do it.
Stephen's going to think of a celebrity. But wait, but Dan, Dan, that only provides one winner.

Speaker 1 I think the winner should then just decide whether it goes left or right.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.
That way

Speaker 6 it doesn't jump around the room. It's just a big circle.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so we'll just get one winner. The winner can decide their own draft.
How long is it? If they want to take it, not that long.

Speaker 1 I don't know any celebrities. Where's you got to come out?

Speaker 1 Where do you got to go?

Speaker 3 I'm trying to think of for the sanctity of the listeners here.

Speaker 1 Oh, the listeners are fucking hanging out. It's July 3rd.
They're sitting at the beach. All right, I just want to see.
They want the voice

Speaker 1 chilling, hanging, having a good time. Hank is...
What are you doing, Hank?

Speaker 5 I'm trying to figure out my list. Chilling?

Speaker 6 He's looking at women on Twitter.

Speaker 6 There's a woman on his screen.

Speaker 1 Okay, so here's how this game works. Steven's going to think of a celebrity.
We'll start with Jerry, and we'll go around the room.

Speaker 1 You guess a name and Steven says warmer or colder. Okay, get it.

Speaker 1 So whoever gets it gets the first pick.

Speaker 3 What if whoever gets it gets to pick the entire order?

Speaker 1 Yeah, no, they get to pick or right. They'll miss that part, left or right.
Unless they don't want to go first. They can also go wherever they want.

Speaker 1 We'll base it off, like if I win and I'm like, I want to go third. Got it, got it.
Like Jerry goes first, Brandon goes second, I go third, and then we'll do that. So this isn't going to mean anything.

Speaker 1 Well, no. It's chafing.

Speaker 6 Yeah, it does. No, but we have to figure out who goes first.
Yeah. Yeah.
All right.

Speaker 1 Okay. You have your celebrity.
Yes. Okay.
Jerry, you start.

Speaker 1 You just guess the person. No clue.
No. I'll say warmer, colder, and then we'll go.
The clue comes after the guess. No clue.
Who comes after the guess? Is this warmer? You're not going to think that.

Speaker 6 But then you have to interpret his words.

Speaker 1 Very cold. Okay.

Speaker 1 It's electric game. Bob Costas.

Speaker 1 Hot. Oh.
Wow. okay.
Al Michaels.

Speaker 1 Similar, slightly, slightly less, slightly colder than that. Okay.

Speaker 6 Slightly colder than Al Michaels, but Bob Costas was hot. Yeah.
He was real hot.

Speaker 6 Ken Rosenthal.

Speaker 1 Colder than.

Speaker 1 Okay, no, we got colder. We got colder.

Speaker 5 Jim Nance.

Speaker 1 Hot. Oh, we're back to hot.

Speaker 1 Scott Van Pelt.

Speaker 1 Very hot. Oh, boy.
Oh, man. Chris Berman.

Speaker 1 Hot.

Speaker 1 Who's another one?

Speaker 1 Linda Cohn.

Speaker 1 Slightly colder than the rest, but you're still hot. Scott Hansen.

Speaker 1 Hotter in some ways,

Speaker 1 slightly colder in some.

Speaker 6 Okay, who's the the hottest one so far?

Speaker 1 Chris Berman. Chris Berman.
Van Pelt. No, Van Pelt.
Van Pelt was the hottest.

Speaker 6 Bob Lay.

Speaker 6 Still very hot.

Speaker 1 That was such a dismissive laugh. Yeah, I know.

Speaker 5 Ryan Rossillo.

Speaker 1 Slightly colder, but very hot still. Okay.

Speaker 9 Stuart Scott.

Speaker 1 In some ways, very hot. Okay.

Speaker 5 In other ways, Sports Center.

Speaker 6 So he's living. Was that a hell joke?

Speaker 1 Okay. Oh, I think I got mine.
All right. Stephen A.
Smith.

Speaker 1 Cooler. Dan Patrick.

Speaker 1 That's the best guest so far. That's the best guest so far? Yeah.
Keith Oberman.

Speaker 1 Still very hot.

Speaker 6 Rich Eisen. Correct.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 God damn.

Speaker 6 Okay, Rich Eisen. All right, so PFT, what position would you like to draft? This is a lot of responsibility here.

Speaker 1 All the celebrities in the world, he chose Rich Eisen. Well,

Speaker 1 I'd pick someone I think everyone knows. Yeah, this is a snake draft, by the way.
Okay.

Speaker 6 You know what?

Speaker 6 I think I'm going to go first.

Speaker 1 Okay. And which direction?

Speaker 6 And we're going to go right.

Speaker 1 Okay, great. So I'll go second.
Third.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Third, fourth, fifth, sixth, hank is sixth, and then it's snake's back.
So

Speaker 1 if you screw up, you would go in between the snake, Steven.

Speaker 1 You get it? No. If I screwed up a pick and picked a duplicate,

Speaker 1 I would go in between whatever snake. So it's either

Speaker 1 PFT's two picks or between Hank's two picks because they're on the ends. Okay, got it.
Okay, PFT. I will say, if someone is out for the year, please let me know.
I don't know most of these guys. Okay.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 6 1-1.

Speaker 6 Making a big bet on this guy.

Speaker 1 Oh, boy. Shohei.
Oh, wow.

Speaker 6 We're going Shohei right off the the bat.

Speaker 1 Oh wow.

Speaker 1 Clear all wrongdoing.

Speaker 6 I conducted a lengthy background assessment on him. I looked into all the forensic accounting.
I've determined that he definitely bet on sports and baseball, but I don't care. So he's on my team.

Speaker 6 Okay. Seam Head Express.

Speaker 1 Good, good pick.

Speaker 6 Oh, we should all have names for our team this year, too.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we should. We should come up with names.
Good, good pick.

Speaker 1 I guess I have to go with Aaron Judge.

Speaker 6 That's a good pick. Great pick.

Speaker 1 Aaron Judge. Great value.
It'd be a shame if he got it. That's great value at two.
Yes. That's great value at two.

Speaker 3 So Otani is a DH, right?

Speaker 6 Otani will be my DH.

Speaker 1 DH, yeah.

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 3 I just

Speaker 1 want to make sure that we... You got that?

Speaker 1 Yep. Okay, Brandon?

Speaker 1 I'm going to go with New York Met Pete Alonzo. Wow.

Speaker 1 Chalk.

Speaker 6 Real easy guy to root for.

Speaker 1 Is he a bad guy?

Speaker 6 No, he's just.

Speaker 1 You guys said we were learning about folks. Why is Max sitting like that? He always sits like that.

Speaker 6 In a chair, it's striking.

Speaker 1 Okay. I'm just going to say right now I had Pete Alonzo as a fourth-round talent.
That sucks. That's so bad.
That sucks. Items so far down.
Currently has 16 home runs. Yikes.

Speaker 1 Well, this isn't about what they currently have. This is about their heart.
This is about their heart and how they're going to finish the season. Yep.
I get it.

Speaker 1 I will go the third base and I will go Jose Ramirez. Nice.
That's a great pick, Jerry. Thank you.
Jerry, I think you could use him as your DH,

Speaker 1 which might be harder to come by. But I don't know.
I got some DHs.

Speaker 1 I'm going to go with Bryce Harper at first base. He's going to get hurt.

Speaker 1 Shut up, dude. So we're just picking our own guys.
Yeah, pretty much. Yeah.

Speaker 1 He's going to get hurt.

Speaker 5 I am going to go with recurring guest of the program, Matt Olson.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Who plays

Speaker 1 first base? Who plays first? That's right.

Speaker 5 Just Schwarber D.H.

Speaker 1 Euphys. Oh.
I'll take Schwarber.

Speaker 1 That's a great pick. That's a great pick.

Speaker 6 Maybe the funnest guy in baseball to root for.

Speaker 5 Easily. Easy one.
Yeah. Easy.

Speaker 1 Easy.

Speaker 9 That sucks.

Speaker 5 That's a first-rounder with

Speaker 1 second-round battle.

Speaker 3 You would have taken Harper if I took Schwarber.

Speaker 5 No.

Speaker 6 Wait, no,

Speaker 6 you got him in the second round, but he's a first-round talent.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay, yeah. Now,

Speaker 1 and he's probably going to...

Speaker 6 Well, the only thing is he might not play competitive baseball deep into September because the Phillies will have the one seed wrapped up.

Speaker 5 That's true.

Speaker 1 Okay, go ahead.

Speaker 1 Wait.

Speaker 3 I'll take Gunnar Henderson. Fuck.

Speaker 3 I don't know how he lasted that long.

Speaker 1 I was hoping that PFT was going to take Judge and I was going to take Gunner, but I had to. He left me Judge, and I had to take him.
I wanted Gunner. Gunner slip to the second round.

Speaker 1 For shortstop off the board. Damn, that's a great pick, Max.
It's a great pick. So it's on Jerry.
It's on me? Okay.

Speaker 1 I will go

Speaker 1 Jordan Alvarez.

Speaker 3 My DH.

Speaker 1 DH.

Speaker 1 That hurt bad. Okay.
He's hurt? No, that hurt bad. Oh.

Speaker 6 He got hurt last year. Okay.

Speaker 1 It's just looking at all the DHs.

Speaker 6 Also, something about a home run ball flying out in Houston just looks cool, doesn't it? It's a great stadium to hit a tater in. Mm-hmm.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 5 Are we doing specific outfield positions or is outfield?

Speaker 1 Outfield positions.

Speaker 1 I'm going to go with outfielder, and somebody's going to have to tell me what position he plays. Juan Soto.
Rightfield. Rightfield.
Good pick. Can't believe he lasted that long.

Speaker 1 Can't believe he lasted that long.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 I will go.

Speaker 1 That was a good pick. That was going to be my pick.
I'm very upset about that pick. Well, Jerry took my pick.

Speaker 1 He did? Yeah.

Speaker 1 But they're all good players. What are you guys colluding about? I don't.

Speaker 3 I was asking what his first pick was because I'm trying to keep track.

Speaker 1 Why is Max my parent judge?

Speaker 1 I knew that.

Speaker 1 Wait, no, it wasn't.

Speaker 1 That was a lie.

Speaker 1 Soto. Okay.

Speaker 1 I will go with

Speaker 1 D.H.

Speaker 1 Marcelo Zuna. Oh, great.

Speaker 1 From the Braves. Great, great.

Speaker 1 Thank you. Thank you.
I like how my team's coming together right now. This is some good podcasting.
Yeah, it really is.

Speaker 6 I need to know how we're going to qualify this guy. Mookie Betts.
What position?

Speaker 5 Where do you want to play? Dodge. I think he's right field.

Speaker 1 Dodger. I think he's.
He's playing the most shortstop.

Speaker 3 This is a Stephen Che question.

Speaker 6 Stephen Che, what is he going to be?

Speaker 1 All right. Let me make an official ruling on this.

Speaker 1 Or Shane. Just to Google Mookie Betts.
Shane or Memes. You guys want to.
Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 He plays right fielder, second base, and a short stop.

Speaker 6 Mr. Position.

Speaker 1 But which one has he played the most at?

Speaker 1 That's a good question.

Speaker 6 I know what I want Steven to say, so I'm not going to say it. I feel like Steven should have had this information.

Speaker 1 Just pick one, PFT.

Speaker 6 I'd like him to be my second base.

Speaker 1 I think he plays second base that much. Yeah, he doesn't play

Speaker 1 shortstop by a lot. Okay, so it's a shortstop.

Speaker 6 I'll take him at shortstop.

Speaker 1 It's a good pick. Well, he's a good pick at shortstop.
He's out for the year.

Speaker 1 Mookie? I'm pretty sure. What?

Speaker 5 I don't think he's out for the year, but he's injured. Are you serious? You locked him in.
It's fine.

Speaker 1 You did lock him in. Yeah.

Speaker 5 Yeah, he got smoked in.

Speaker 5 He got smoked in the hand.

Speaker 6 Dodgers are proving they can stay afloat without Mookie Pets.

Speaker 1 What the fuck?

Speaker 1 Well, so PFT is at that. So you now.

Speaker 1 Is he out for the year? No, no, he's not out for the year. Okay.
He's fine.

Speaker 1 Any injury that's not out for the year, your pick stays. I did that last year.
We all did that last year. We picked guys that were hurt by accident.

Speaker 1 He's hurt bad.

Speaker 6 He's not hurt bad.

Speaker 5 Dude, watch the video of him getting hit in the hand. It sounds

Speaker 6 I don't want to listen to it. I don't want to watch it.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 5 Good pick. Thank you.
Good play. Good pick.

Speaker 1 I'm going to go with.

Speaker 5 Was the MVP favorite when he got hurt.

Speaker 1 He'll be back. Yeah.

Speaker 6 You just don't like him because he left you.

Speaker 1 I love Mookie Biz.

Speaker 1 I don't know. I'm going to go with,

Speaker 6 was it John Stanton? Is that what Biz called him?

Speaker 5 John Carlos.

Speaker 6 Carlos Stanton? I think he called him Carlos Stanton. John Carlos.

Speaker 1 I know his name, but you know, he called him John Carlos.

Speaker 6 John Carlos Stanton.

Speaker 1 John Carlos Stanton. Also hurt.

Speaker 6 Are you serious? But always hurt.

Speaker 1 Yeah, definitely hurt.

Speaker 6 Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 This is incredible.

Speaker 6 Left hamstring expects to miss four weeks.

Speaker 1 Well, that's not that bad. That's not that bad.
Yeah, that's fine. It's a month.
Nothing. You're good.
You're good. You're good.

Speaker 1 That's nothing.

Speaker 1 You loves pitching. I am fucked.
He is a DH, yes.

Speaker 6 He's an outfielder.

Speaker 1 That's fine. He's mostly DH.
You could. Whatever.
Let's let him have it. Yeah, let him have it

Speaker 1 out for a month. He's a DH.
He's not doing anything. He's a DH.
Wait, do you have a DH?

Speaker 6 He already has Otani. He's a DH.

Speaker 1 Oh, no. All right.
I'm going to need Otani. Thank God you have that list.
Put the team in my car.

Speaker 1 Sorry, what position do you want him to be? He's going to be outfield. We're just doing what we want now.

Speaker 6 Specifically, left field, rightfield,

Speaker 5 left field.

Speaker 1 Okay. Wait,

Speaker 1 it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter.
You get three outfielders.

Speaker 3 It doesn't matter what you do.

Speaker 1 No, you have to get the right field. Right outfielder.
Oh, okay. Yeah.
Wait, I thought Soto played right field.

Speaker 1 Soto, I have.

Speaker 1 Soto doesn't. Soto is a right fielder.
Right. Jean-Carl.
I mean, Jean-Carl is the DH. Yeah.
He's 100% a DH.

Speaker 1 Well, then PFT has two DHs. All right, so

Speaker 1 he has to count him as a left fielder.

Speaker 6 Well, then, no, I probably have to take him out of my lineup. No, you probably have to do a different pick.
I have to do left field.

Speaker 1 Left field? Okay. Yeah.
Okay.

Speaker 1 I will take

Speaker 1 for my

Speaker 1 next selection.

Speaker 1 I don't understand. Good pick.
I don't understand

Speaker 1 Ebo's list.

Speaker 1 It doesn't really have a lot of rhyme or reason to it, does it? No. No.

Speaker 1 It doesn't.

Speaker 6 This could have been an email.

Speaker 1 I'll take Anthony Santander. Great pick.
Thank you, Jerry. Do you know who that is? Yeah, right fielder.
Okay. Orioles.

Speaker 1 I.

Speaker 1 This is some good podcast. Yeah, it really is.

Speaker 1 I like that we invited Brandon on the first time for the worst thing we do.

Speaker 6 You can't come off this looking good.

Speaker 1 If you don't like this episode, please tweet PFW. Yeah.
Let him know that he can't come back on. Yeah.
See you guys in September.

Speaker 1 I will take... I don't know if he's...
I'm going to take Austin Riley. Oh.
Third baseman, former Mississippi State signee of the Atlanta Braves. Oh.
Okay, you got a brave.

Speaker 1 I don't know how this guy didn't get off the board yet, but I'll go first base, Josh Naylor. Ooh.

Speaker 1 He's hurt. Is he? Is he? Nah, I don't know.
He could be. I don't even know who he plays for.

Speaker 1 Okay, you're up. Sounds like Hornstein.
Is it me?

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 3 I am going to go with

Speaker 3 Raphael Devers. Fuck you, Hank.

Speaker 1 Oh, nice. Got his ass, third baseman.
Picked him off.

Speaker 1 Third baseman, Raphael Devers.

Speaker 5 I will go with,

Speaker 5 and I feel like he might be hurt, Fernando Tatis Jr. He is hurt.

Speaker 6 It's a good pick, Hank.

Speaker 1 He's hurt.

Speaker 3 Yeah, but I don't think he's out for two.

Speaker 6 I think he's really hurt.

Speaker 5 And then I will go.

Speaker 1 Where does Tatis play? Right field.

Speaker 5 He plays right field.

Speaker 5 Oh, fuck.

Speaker 5 Hmm.

Speaker 5 Let's go, Jazz Chisholm.

Speaker 1 Jazz Chisholm. Good pick, Hank.
What position does that gentleman? He's center field. Okay.
Two.

Speaker 1 I have lost. I've lost the plot.
I am all

Speaker 1 in every single place that we're at right now. Yep.

Speaker 3 I'm going to go with

Speaker 3 Nolan Gourmand.

Speaker 1 That's definitely not his name.

Speaker 3 Nolan Gourman.

Speaker 1 What position? What position? What is it? What are the plans in the second base? Did you take two, Hank? Yeah. Okay.

Speaker 1 I don't know who's been.

Speaker 1 We're all over the place now.

Speaker 1 I know.

Speaker 6 What I'm doing, I'm just going way far down the list, assuming none of those guys.

Speaker 1 I just have outfielders.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I only have outfielders. All right.
I'm just guessing on their positions. It's on me? Yes.
Okay.

Speaker 1 I will go.

Speaker 1 Do I have this position?

Speaker 1 Center field.

Speaker 1 I will go

Speaker 1 Julio Rodriguez. It's a great pick, Jerry.
It's just a phenomenal pick.

Speaker 5 Yeah, I feel you're taking like stock names.

Speaker 1 This is a center field. Who's your player? Who's your first guy? So my lineup right now is,

Speaker 1 I don't even know. Jose Ramirez,

Speaker 1 Jordan Alvarez, Josh Nailer, and

Speaker 1 where I just picked. I don't even know his name.

Speaker 1 He'll already guess.

Speaker 1 What? These are bad names? No, I'm trying to figure out what position everybody plays.

Speaker 1 He plays center field. I'm not worried about him.
I'm worried about the next guy I pick. Okay, you got this, Brendan.

Speaker 1 I'm going to go ahead and take the Oscar Hernandez.

Speaker 1 The? The Oscar Hernandez.

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 3 You just gave me shit for Nolan Gourmand. You just said the Oscar.

Speaker 1 Why are you hollering? T.O. Oscar.

Speaker 1 Don't holler at him.

Speaker 1 Don't holler at us. This is the show.
Why is is he hollering? Don't holler at him.

Speaker 6 It's like Ohio State. It's the Oscar.

Speaker 1 The Oscar Hernandez.

Speaker 1 Don't be hollering at him.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but T is Spanish for thee. Oh, wow.

Speaker 1 Okay, this could

Speaker 1 be a reach. You know what? I'm not going to do it.

Speaker 5 That was going to be stupid.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that was stupid. Let's see.

Speaker 1 That was going to be dumb.

Speaker 1 Has

Speaker 1 anyone taken.

Speaker 1 I don't think you can ask this question.

Speaker 1 That's pretty untrue.

Speaker 1 I'll just say a name, and this isn't who I'm taking, but

Speaker 1 wait, is he hurt? That might be hurt.

Speaker 6 Y'all, you shouldn't look it up. You should just roll the dice.

Speaker 1 Okay, I'll roll the dice. Yeah, Live Dangerously, man.

Speaker 1 Christian Walker. Is he real? Yeah.

Speaker 1 First baseman. Arizona Diamondbacks.
That's my guy. Great pick, Dan.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I'm giving up on trying to keep track of who's taking people because I was trying early.

Speaker 6 Okay, I'm going to go with Ellie De La Cruz.

Speaker 1 Oh, that was who I was going to pick. Ellie, give me Ellie as a reach.
No, it's not. Yeah, because

Speaker 1 you could have had him with this pick.

Speaker 6 I got him. I could have had him with my second.
That's what I'm saying. Yeah, with my second base.
So is the reach. Ellie De La Cruz, third base.

Speaker 1 No, second. Short stop.
Short. Short stop.
Short stop.

Speaker 1 I saw him have

Speaker 1 short stop. 100%.
But we have

Speaker 1 Mookie Betts. Oh, you can't take him.

Speaker 5 Oh, no.

Speaker 1 You can't take Ellie. Well, Mookie's dead.
No, you can't take Ellie. Yeah.
Can't.

Speaker 5 You already have two right fielders.

Speaker 1 You're making a debacle of this.

Speaker 6 Yeah. Why can't I? Because you already have a shortstop.

Speaker 5 It seems like you may stay good with his list not having positions on it.

Speaker 6 That's going to stop. That might be true.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we've already given you a real nice one having two DHs.

Speaker 6 Okay, give me Mike Trout. Okay.

Speaker 1 He's out till all.

Speaker 1 I think you're only

Speaker 1 throwing this. I think he's coming back soon.
I think you're throwing this. He's out till August.
He's coming back. You're throwing this right now.
He's coming back in August.

Speaker 1 The PMC is not even starting until August. Yeah.
You're throwing this. I think you're throwing this.
I'm going to show you.

Speaker 3 You enjoyed pitching.

Speaker 1 I did not.

Speaker 6 I was forgetting.

Speaker 1 I was sore for a week. But you're throwing this.

Speaker 6 I'm just doing a bad job.

Speaker 1 Just on that side.

Speaker 1 PFT, you're back on the clock.

Speaker 6 And I can't take Ellie.

Speaker 1 I think you have to throw out Mike Trout, too.

Speaker 6 I mean, yeah, I'll throw him. Absolutely.

Speaker 1 Yeah, because I don't want you to throw it.

Speaker 6 I'm honestly not throwing it.

Speaker 1 Mike Trout is like a last-round pick. He's not back till mid-August.
Okay, well,

Speaker 6 thank you for changing the rules of the game. I will accept it.

Speaker 1 We don't want to throw.

Speaker 6 I'm going to take.

Speaker 6 Hmm.

Speaker 6 See, I know whoever I'm about to say,

Speaker 6 I'm not going to be allowed to take.

Speaker 6 You know what? I'll take Salvador Perez.

Speaker 3 Good pick.

Speaker 1 That's an awful pick. What? Catcher? A catcher? He's not even the best catcher.

Speaker 1 I like him. Okay.

Speaker 6 He was on the Seam Head Express a couple years ago.

Speaker 1 Okay, and you have another pick.

Speaker 6 I'm just going to make sure this person's not hurt.

Speaker 6 I think we can all agree that's a fair thing to do. I'm going to go with Freddie Freeman.

Speaker 1 It's a good pick. Good pick.
Who's that guy? Yep.

Speaker 1 I will take Ellie Dela Cruz.

Speaker 1 Reach. I knew that I.
No, that was great value. I waited all the way until it came back because I knew you already had a shortstop.
Reach.

Speaker 6 I did not wait.

Speaker 1 I already had a short stop. Thank you, Jerry.
Appreciate that.

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Speaker 1 Brandon. Brandon, you're up.
I will take Bobby Witt Jr. Okay.
Oof.

Speaker 1 Stooley. What is that? What was Oof? We missed one on there.
I'll go with my stock name pick. Shortstop, Corey Seeger.
Okay. That's a good nice pick.
Hold on one second. Hold Hold on one second.

Speaker 1 Oh, no.

Speaker 1 Please. Please announce positions with what it really is fun.
This is fun. It's enjoyable to be with you guys.
I've never been allowed to be with you guys, and I appreciate it. Seeger, shortstop.

Speaker 1 Great time.

Speaker 1 Great time.

Speaker 3 My turn? Yeah.

Speaker 1 My turn?

Speaker 1 That's good.

Speaker 3 I will be taking Adley Ruchman.

Speaker 1 Good pick.

Speaker 3 Catcher.

Speaker 1 He's the commissioner.

Speaker 1 Yeah, no

Speaker 1 shit about baseball. I don't know anything about baseball, bro.
He didn't know shit about shit. He's broju.

Speaker 5 I will go with Alec Baum at third base.

Speaker 1 That's not his name. Beast.
What's his name? I don't know.

Speaker 3 He's more of a doubles guy than a home runs guy, but that's fine.

Speaker 5 And at second base, I will go with Jose Altuve.

Speaker 1 Yep, could go with it.

Speaker 1 That's definitely his name.

Speaker 3 I'm going to take Kyle Tucker.

Speaker 1 What positions he play? Right field. You just say right field for everybody.

Speaker 3 Does he have right field? Okay, I was worried somebody else had taken him.

Speaker 1 But, yep, Kyle Tucker. Okay.

Speaker 1 Hank who's your second one. That's a great pick, Max.
Yeah, great. That was really great.

Speaker 1 Just trying to remember these picks is very, very difficult.

Speaker 6 It's very challenging.

Speaker 1 Very, very difficult.

Speaker 1 Okay, you're up, Jerry. I'm up?

Speaker 1 Yeah. Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 I'm going to go with

Speaker 3 right field

Speaker 1 Adolescent. Yep.

Speaker 1 That's a good name.

Speaker 3 You have a great name team out there.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you do have a great name team.

Speaker 1 I will be selecting second baseman Jordan Westberg of the Baltimore Orioles. Nice.

Speaker 1 Was he here? Was he one of the guys here? Yes. He's family, and he's former Mr.
State. What was his name? Jordan Westberg.

Speaker 1 What does he do? He plays second base for the Baltimore Orioles. Second or third? He plays second.
Fair.

Speaker 1 Fair. Ooh.

Speaker 1 Let me get a ruling on that. Sure about that? Uh-oh.

Speaker 6 Yeah, I'd like to see a ruling. Okay.

Speaker 1 A ruling for the commission.

Speaker 1 No, he's a lot of fun. It says second and third baseman.
I will do like I did for everyone else. I'll look at his stats and see what he plays more of.

Speaker 1 Is that fair? Do you feel good about this?

Speaker 1 We just had a fist bump because of my. No, I'm just saying.
I had to question it because my list says something different. He plays way more third base.
Is that what you wanted?

Speaker 1 I already have a third base.

Speaker 1 Okay, so I would rule that you cannot take him. So I'm not taking him?

Speaker 1 Oh, wait. Oh, wait.

Speaker 1 Third baseman? You took Austin Riley. Correct.
Yeah. You cannot take him.

Speaker 1 Wait, still Brandon. Okay, Brandon.
I will take catcher Cal Raleigh.

Speaker 1 Fuck, that was going to be my pick. Who has Tiasco Hernandez? I do.
Is he hurt? No, I just. He is the Oscar.

Speaker 1 I didn't know if anyone picked him.

Speaker 1 That was a good way of me finding out.

Speaker 1 Okay. I really wanted Westburg.

Speaker 1 What was that noise? That was me scratching off Jordan Westberg angrily.

Speaker 1 We can note that everyone has a first baseman.

Speaker 1 First basemans are done. That's interesting.
We love that. That's an interesting fact.
Why do you love that?

Speaker 1 Because we don't have to worry about it anymore. Okay.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we don't have to worry about that anymore.

Speaker 1 I really was going to take Cal Raleigh, and you fucked me real bad.

Speaker 1 Jerry fucked you by making a noise about Jordan Westbrook, who is a second baseman.

Speaker 1 He has played second base, but it looks like 80% of the time he's at third.

Speaker 1 Tyler O'Neill hasn't been taken, right? Not in this draft. He has not.
I'll take Tyler O'Neal. Is that the guy who Dave texted me and was like, bet on him to hit the home run?

Speaker 1 Oh, Mr. Opening Day? Yeah, Mr.
Opening Day. Might be.
Okay. Tyler O'Neal.

Speaker 1 PFT. Left field.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 6 I'm going to go with... Oh,

Speaker 6 I almost did it again.

Speaker 1 No way. Guy is throwing the draft.

Speaker 6 I'm not throwing the draft, I promise you. If I tried to throw the draft, I would not be this good.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 6 This is a nightmare for me right now.

Speaker 6 I should have done more prep.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 6 I should have done any prep.

Speaker 6 Hot Cody Bellinger.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 1 Position.

Speaker 6 Center field.

Speaker 1 I think that's right. Checks out.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 1 Okay. Yep, you're good.
Cody's been not great this year.

Speaker 6 He's coming on. His nine home runs.

Speaker 1 Eleanor about what's happening.

Speaker 6 The wind's about to start blowing out big time.

Speaker 1 When does the home run start?

Speaker 6 July 4th.

Speaker 1 That's when our stats start. Yeah, this comes out July 3rd.
All stats start July 4th.

Speaker 1 Gotcha.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 6 I'm looking for a second baseman.

Speaker 1 Excuse me.

Speaker 6 Has Marcus Simeon been picked?

Speaker 1 He has not. I don't think so.

Speaker 6 Then I'm going to take Marcus Simeon.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 I don't want to take this guy, but I have to have at least one cub.

Speaker 1 So I'm going to take Christopher Morrell. Oh, I knew that.
Sorry, who'd you take? Christopher Morrell.

Speaker 1 All he does is hit dingers and make errors.

Speaker 1 I will position as Mr. Murrell.
Third base. He's hitting 204.

Speaker 1 Care about Omars.

Speaker 1 That's what he does. He just fucking launches them, and then he sucks everywhere else.
Brendan? I would like second baseman Ozzie

Speaker 1 Albies. Oh, a little run on second baseman here, huh? Yeah, yeah.
Let's get rid of him.

Speaker 1 Who is it? Ozzy Albies. Is anybody else respecting

Speaker 1 left field, right center, right field, center field?

Speaker 6 After this round, I think that Che should go team by team and let us know what positions we still need.

Speaker 1 I absolutely did. I have a left fielder, center fielder, right fielder.
Because I only have

Speaker 1 a right fielder, and I don't know what Tiasco Hernandez is.

Speaker 3 Tiasco Hernandez is left field.

Speaker 1 So I need a center field. Thank you, Max.
You're welcome.

Speaker 1 I said thank you, Max. I take all credit for Max's things.
Very good. Yeah.

Speaker 1 All right, who's up?

Speaker 3 JJ.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 1 I think I need a left fielder fielder right now. We're actually cruising here.
We've got seven rounds. We're done.
Almost. Yep, six and a half.

Speaker 1 I'm just going to go off a name that just sounds like a home run guy. Okay.

Speaker 1 Barry Bonds. No.
Oh. I don't even know how to pronounce this.

Speaker 1 Randy Zarina. Yeah.
You didn't even try one of the syllables. Rose Zarina.
You didn't even try one of the syllables. Is it home run guy?

Speaker 1 Say it again. Randy Zarina.
Randy Zarina. Left fielder? Yeah.

Speaker 1 How is he? He does hit bombs. Does he? Yeah.
Fair. I'm in.

Speaker 1 We were in as soon as you picked him. Yeah.

Speaker 3 I'm going to take Brian De La Cruz, D.H.

Speaker 1 You made that guy up. Nope.
He has 14 home runs this year.

Speaker 5 I'm going to take another Cruz.

Speaker 1 O'Neal. Yeah.
O'Neill moves. Oh.
Job, Hank. Is he hurt? He sucks.
No, he's a beast.

Speaker 1 What position is that, gentlemen? He's a shortstop.

Speaker 5 I don't think I have a third baseman.

Speaker 1 Sorry, can you say that name again?

Speaker 5 O'Neil Cruz.

Speaker 1 What's he doing?

Speaker 5 Oh, no, I do have a third baseman.

Speaker 5 And for my catcher, I'm going to take

Speaker 1 Will Smith.

Speaker 5 Getting jiggy with it.

Speaker 1 Nice.

Speaker 1 Do you want a position recap or no? I do. Yeah.
Sure.

Speaker 1 So that was the end of.

Speaker 3 I'm good. I know where I'm going.

Speaker 1 Yeah, no, let's not. I'm good.
I I got it.

Speaker 1 I desperately need it.

Speaker 9 You got this.

Speaker 3 I will be taking Riley Green, left field.

Speaker 1 Great pick.

Speaker 1 Who'd you take? I didn't take Riley Green. Nobody's taking him yet.
Who'd you take? Oh. Ozzy Albies?

Speaker 1 You took someone. I didn't take Riley Green.
I took Austin Riley. Ah, there it is.
There it is. I knew there was something.

Speaker 1 On me? How many rounds have we done? This is going to be the eighth round. Two rounds left.
I will do

Speaker 1 my second base. I would do Cattell Marte.
Ah, that's where I

Speaker 1 wanted.

Speaker 1 I will go center field. I don't know if he's hurt.

Speaker 1 Luis Robert Jr. Oh,

Speaker 1 that's where I was going. Yeah,

Speaker 6 he kind of stinks

Speaker 1 so far. Fuck.

Speaker 3 I thought no one else was going to take him.

Speaker 1 But I did.

Speaker 1 But you did.

Speaker 1 Okay, I'm going to take

Speaker 1 this is going to be a name I don't know how to pronounce, but I'm going to say it anyway. Oh, no, this guy sucks.

Speaker 1 Oh,

Speaker 1 oh, he hits no home runs. Anyone got a second baseman they think they like?

Speaker 1 I did, but Che wouldn't let me have him.

Speaker 3 Brayson Stott, good player.

Speaker 1 Who?

Speaker 3 Brayson Stott, second baseman for the Phils, great player.

Speaker 1 Is he actually... Does he hit a home run? He's certainly not a great player.

Speaker 3 No, he's a good player with runs and scoring position.

Speaker 1 That doesn't.

Speaker 1 Second base sucks, huh? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Who got the best second baseman? Marcus Simeon was a good pick. Whoever got him.
Thank you. Jose Altuve was a good pick.
Whoever got him. Thank you.
Nolan Gourmand.

Speaker 1 Good pick.

Speaker 1 Thank you. You got both those?

Speaker 1 No, I got

Speaker 1 Nolan Gourmand.

Speaker 1 I'm going to take.

Speaker 1 This is great. I love this.
I love this for us. I will take

Speaker 1 Tyro Estrada.

Speaker 6 Good pick. Tyro?

Speaker 1 Second baseman. Yep, nine home runs.
Yeah, but he's hit one in the last month.

Speaker 1 He's hot.

Speaker 1 PFT back to back. I think I made some.

Speaker 6 So I have two positions to fill.

Speaker 6 Yes. Can you tell me what those two positions are?

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 1 You need a third baseman.

Speaker 6 Okay, and then a right fielder?

Speaker 1 No, you already have two right fielders. No, he has no right fielders.
Oh.

Speaker 1 We classify. Oh, he tried to make John Carlo a right fielder.

Speaker 5 And then he tried to take Trout.

Speaker 1 And then he tried to take Trout.

Speaker 1 Yes. So you need a right fielder and a...

Speaker 1 Third baseman.

Speaker 6 Right fielder and a third baseman, huh? I just see what position they've been playing.

Speaker 1 We rolled John Carlo left field. Do we want to look into that? I can look into that.
He's DH.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 But we're giving him left field.

Speaker 6 Okay, so I need to fill.

Speaker 6 Manny Machado.

Speaker 1 DH? What does he play?

Speaker 6 Third base, right?

Speaker 3 He does play third base.

Speaker 3 I think he's more than that.

Speaker 1 I thought that should be. How painful is this for like

Speaker 1 this so bad?

Speaker 1 I thought he was a third baseman.

Speaker 6 Yeah, he is a third baseman.

Speaker 3 He's like

Speaker 5 very much a third.

Speaker 6 He's a third baseman. He's a dh.

Speaker 6 He's a third baseman.

Speaker 6 Yeah.

Speaker 6 I was all over that one.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 6 And so now we need a center fielder.

Speaker 1 Oh, I got one for you.

Speaker 6 What do you recommend here, Jerry?

Speaker 1 Ask Jerry. No, not a third baseman.
You need a right fielder.

Speaker 6 Oh, we need a right fielder. Yes.

Speaker 1 You want to take something from Max? Cody Bellinger at center.

Speaker 6 Okay. I do want to take something from Max.

Speaker 1 Get Castellanos.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's a good pick. He plays center field.
Right field. Right field.
Oh.

Speaker 6 Max, what's he playing these days?

Speaker 3 He plays right field.

Speaker 1 Okay, I got him.

Speaker 6 Okay. It'll be a deep drive to left.

Speaker 1 My last pick is going to be

Speaker 1 Shay Langliers. Oh, that was mine.

Speaker 1 Fuck. From the Oakland Athletics.

Speaker 1 Catcher.

Speaker 1 Catcher. Shay Langliers.
Great. Okay.

Speaker 1 I almost picked a guy who was retired, I think. Okay.

Speaker 6 Dale Murphy?

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 I don't know. I can't find.
How can y'all find who's playing DH?

Speaker 1 Where are you getting this information from? I'll just give you some DHs.

Speaker 6 I think for the most part, we're seeing it.

Speaker 3 Andrew McCutcheon saying he's having a good year.

Speaker 1 I'll give you some DHs. Okay, but

Speaker 1 Martinez. I feel like everybody else is just going to use somebody who's already in position.
Brent Rooker. I mean, we all got real DHs.
Is Manny Machado a DH? That's what I said.

Speaker 3 Manny Machado is like one of the best defenses.

Speaker 1 He plays base in the league. Yeah.
All right.

Speaker 1 I'm done. Brent Rooker.
Yeah. DH.
Yeah, that's. He went to Mississippi State.
That's good enough for me. Did he actually? Yeah.
Oh.

Speaker 6 You guys must have won a lot of championships.

Speaker 1 We won one.

Speaker 1 We're there all the time. But Olmiss won one right after, so it negated yours.

Speaker 6 That's the one I remembered. I forgot about Mississippi State.
Really?

Speaker 1 Who was there? Who named one player off that team?

Speaker 6 No, I remember them winning the championship.

Speaker 1 You remember it? Who was one player off their team? Ben Mintz. Yeah, he was good.

Speaker 1 Damn good.

Speaker 1 Jerry? Jerry.

Speaker 1 Yep. I will do.

Speaker 1 I don't know this guy's name. Oh, Hope.

Speaker 1 O'Hopy. What? Catcher.
Catcher. L.
O'Hopy. Yep.
L. O'Hopy.
Catcher.

Speaker 1 He's got 10 home runs on the year right now.

Speaker 6 It's pretty good.

Speaker 3 Yeah, center field's pretty tough.

Speaker 3 I'm going to go with

Speaker 3 J.J. Blidet.

Speaker 3 I wanted to do Trout, but the injury is tough.

Speaker 1 These colours are whack. What picks mid-August?

Speaker 3 Center field.

Speaker 5 Whoever got Tyler O'Neal was a great pick.

Speaker 1 I did because Dave texted me that time.

Speaker 5 So

Speaker 5 then I will go.

Speaker 5 Let's just go with a name.

Speaker 6 That makes sense. It's a good choice, yeah.

Speaker 5 Jurickson Profar. Good name.

Speaker 1 That's a good one. That's

Speaker 1 what I just said. Bombs.

Speaker 5 And then, Steven, what hypothetically would my last position be?

Speaker 3 Wait, I think you're done. Wait, did you just

Speaker 5 for left? I think I'm done.

Speaker 1 This is the last round. Yeah, Hank is done.
I'm done, too. We're all done.
We're all done.

Speaker 1 That was great.

Speaker 1 Now we got to pick pitchers. Pitchers.
Yeah. Strikeouts.
Strikeouts.

Speaker 1 Strikeouts.

Speaker 6 And that's going to be the tiebreaker for what?

Speaker 1 If there's a tie.

Speaker 3 So does Hank go now? That makes sense. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 6 I should get to go first, right? Oh, actually, yeah.

Speaker 6 I won Jeopardy.

Speaker 3 And

Speaker 3 you had the best draft also.

Speaker 1 It goes back to the original. I had a really good draft.

Speaker 5 Wait, why should I have to go last? No, it goes back to the.

Speaker 1 This isn't a round.

Speaker 1 Yeah, this, yeah, it starts. Yeah, PFT goes.

Speaker 6 Okay, so I.

Speaker 1 What? No, no, no. This is.
But this isn't a round, and the draft is over. This is an extra.
So it's a free-for-all. All right, I'll take glass now.
No, no, no, no, no. Free-for-all.

Speaker 1 All right, I got Tariq Scoobel. I got Skein.
Zach Wheeler. I got Skein.

Speaker 1 I got Sease.

Speaker 6 Crochet. Dylan Cease.
I think that worked out well.

Speaker 1 Yeah, no, we should have been doing that this whole draft. If we just started.
If Steven says a position,

Speaker 1 and then we all just say

Speaker 1 oh

Speaker 1 should we start over

Speaker 6 no no no no i mean i think we learned a bunch of names right now i think we're all baseball experts after that draft let's just see what what would have happened steven

Speaker 1 say a random position left field uh

Speaker 6 john carlos standards now the old

Speaker 1 yoscar hernandez

Speaker 1 can everyone say who the pitcher they said out loud is skeens garrett crochet god damn it skeins was genius left to right skeens pole skeins skeins because it's it's not how many you've had.

Speaker 1 It's all golden. Or no, wait.
No, it's season total. You said it was.
Season total. It's season total.
Wait. Well, that's actually a terrible season to get.
That's a terrible pick, Dan.

Speaker 1 Yeah, bad pick.

Speaker 3 Wait, season total? It's not from here. No, it should be from here on out.

Speaker 1 No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Speaker 1 It's a tiebreaker. It's not going to be hard.
That's crazy. I did say it was.

Speaker 3 But why would the home runs be from here on out?

Speaker 1 Because the home runs. None of it makes sense.
That's true. Yeah.
Why am I home? I had Garrett Crochet. I took

Speaker 1 Schubo because I have him to win the Sion.

Speaker 1 He doesn't get a lot of strikeouts, does he? He's fifth in the league. You took Schoobel, you said? Got 112.
Whoa, that's Scoobel.

Speaker 6 Okay. PFTU, dude.
You took Dylan Cece.

Speaker 1 Cece.

Speaker 1 Max or Jeff?

Speaker 3 Zach Wheeler.

Speaker 1 Paul Skeens ain't even in the top 200. No.
He started late.

Speaker 5 Tyler Glissnow.

Speaker 3 Steamheads are going to be so upset with you guys, not with me.

Speaker 6 John Tyler.

Speaker 1 You just picked all Phillies.

Speaker 3 I picked literally one Philly.

Speaker 1 I tried to pick it up. All Phillies.

Speaker 3 Well, Zach Wheeler, I guess, but he's not really on my team.

Speaker 1 All right, Stephen, you want to be.

Speaker 6 Also, as bad as this was, I think this was leaps and bounds ahead of last year. Yeah.
In terms of

Speaker 1 pulling ball.

Speaker 3 There was so much. The breaks were so much longer last year.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 3 We just kind of ripped it.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we ripped it. All right.
So, Stephen, can you give us a recap of all of our teams? We'll do draft grades. Nobody picked Vlad J.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. Last year, TJ picked an entire team of guys that we didn't pick.

Speaker 1 I don't think he finished last. Memes should do that.

Speaker 6 No, memes. You're not like second.

Speaker 1 Yeah, memes, you want to do it?

Speaker 1 He hasn't.

Speaker 1 I have no idea. Yeah, yeah.
Okay.

Speaker 1 I can't believe Jerry took Skeens.

Speaker 6 Why'd you pick Skeens?

Speaker 1 How many strikers is he? What do you know about him? He's not even in the top 300. He's got like 30.
Jerry, what do you know about him?

Speaker 1 I know he dates Livby Dunn. There you go.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 How long, memes, how long have we been doing this?

Speaker 6 Like 30. Two years.
It's been our second year.

Speaker 1 50? Oh, that's not bad. Yeah, that's pretty good.

Speaker 3 Because it's like almost a full. You're really worried about it.

Speaker 1 Oh, oh, you got to call Gunner.

Speaker 1 Here.

Speaker 1 You got to call Gunner. Is he at practice? No, he should be done.
Done with this meeting? Here.

Speaker 6 All right, we're going to go out there. We're going to have you guys hit the ball today.

Speaker 1 All right. Welcome to your team.

Speaker 1 Stop, Hank.

Speaker 1 You might still be a BP. Yeah.
Probably still a BP. It's okay.

Speaker 6 You want to leave a message?

Speaker 1 Leave a message, Max. Yeah.
Leave a message. No, I don't.
Well, I don't know. Leave a message, Max.
Leave a message.

Speaker 1 I love him.

Speaker 1 Yeah, leave him a message. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 6 Who wants to hear from you?

Speaker 1 I don't think anybody leaves their first and last name.

Speaker 3 Hey, Mr. Henderson, this is Max Delente, owner of the Pugs Dingers-only Fantasy Baseball League.

Speaker 3 I just want to let you know with the second-round pick of the Pugs, we've gone with shortstop Gunner Henderson.

Speaker 3 We're really happy to have you on board, and I hope that you're excited to join the Pugs. Thank you.

Speaker 1 Good message. Good message.
Thank you. Thank you.

Speaker 6 All right. So, yeah, let's run through the list.

Speaker 1 Colin's not showing his number.

Speaker 1 Cool. Good point.

Speaker 3 Yeah. Who'd we get?

Speaker 1 You want to list the overall rosters? Yeah. Okay.

Speaker 1 I'm just going to go first, last. PFT, Shohei Otani.

Speaker 6 Awesome pick.

Speaker 1 Mookie Betts. Good pick.
John Carlos Stanton. Most of these are hurt.
Great pick.

Speaker 1 Salvador Perez. I love him.
Freddie Freeman. Good pick.
Cody Bellinger. Great pick.
Marcus Simeon. Manny Machado.
Awesome. And Nick Castellanos.

Speaker 6 I'm just going to say that my Mandy Machado pick

Speaker 6 may be the steal of the draft.

Speaker 1 And you have no idea where he plays.

Speaker 6 He plays for San Diego.

Speaker 1 No, what position? Third base. Okay.

Speaker 6 You guys tried to tell me he wasn't a third base. DH.

Speaker 6 He tries hard every day. That's what I like about Manny Machado.
Yeah. Good clean player.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Big hat. Aaron Judge.
Yeah. Marcel Azuna.
Yeah. Anthony Santander.
Oh, yeah. Christian Walker.
Ellie De La Cruz. Tyler O'Neill.
Christopher Morel.

Speaker 1 Thyro Estrada. Shea Legilliers.
Yeah, it fell off at the end.

Speaker 1 I think I got a solid team until second base and catcher. If I can get 10 home runs out of the two of those guys, I'll be okay.

Speaker 1 all right brandon has got pete alonzo juan soto oscar riley austin awes austin riley sorry uh tayoscar hernandez yeah

Speaker 1 tayoscar hernandez

Speaker 1 bobby witt jr cal rale Ozzie Albies, Luis Robert Jr., and Brent Rooker. No holes in that lineup.

Speaker 1 That's a good one, right?

Speaker 1 Jerry has got Jose Ramirez, Jordan Alvarez, Josh Naylor, Julio Rodriguez. Oh, my God.
Corey Seeger, Adallis Garcia. Yep.
Randy. A.
Dallas Garcia.

Speaker 1 A Dallas. A Dallas Garcia.

Speaker 1 A Dallas.

Speaker 1 How do you say that name? Dallas. A Dallas.
A Dallas. A Dallas.
Adalles. Adalles Garcia.
Apologies to his family. His family's listening right now.
Like, what the fuck, Jay?

Speaker 6 Randy. Apologize to him,

Speaker 6 not his sister.

Speaker 1 Apologies. Adoles or Adoles? Adalis.
Yeah. Adalis, Garcia.

Speaker 1 Randy Aruzarina. Uh-huh.
Ked L. Marte, Logan Ojapi.

Speaker 1 Stacked. Max has got Bryce Harper.

Speaker 1 Gunner Henderson. L.
Raphael Devers.

Speaker 1 Ah, yup. Yep.
Knew that was coming.

Speaker 3 I was excited for the L there.

Speaker 1 Nolan Gourmand, Audley Rushman.

Speaker 6 So many of these names, I get dizzy listening to Stephen Che pronounce them.

Speaker 1 He's just, yeah. Say a Rosarina again.

Speaker 1 Randy Rosarina.

Speaker 6 That makes me dizzy.

Speaker 1 Kyle Tucker for Max. Brian De La Cruz.
Riley Green.

Speaker 3 J.J. Blide.

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 1 We've got...

Speaker 1 Matt Olson, Kyle Schwarber. Stud.
Fernando Tatis Jr.

Speaker 1 Injured, not hurt.

Speaker 1 Ooh.

Speaker 1 Jay Chisholm. What's his first name?

Speaker 6 Yaz.

Speaker 5 Yaz.

Speaker 6 It's pronounced Yaz.

Speaker 1 Yaz? Yaz.

Speaker 6 It's like Yaz. Jazz the word Jazz.

Speaker 1 No,

Speaker 1 it is the word Jazz. It is literally the word Jazz.
Yaz.

Speaker 1 Jazz Chisholm Jr.

Speaker 1 Alec Baum.

Speaker 1 Jose El Tuve, O'Neil Cruz, Will Smith,

Speaker 1 Jurickson Profar.

Speaker 1 Nice. I don't want to just listen to him read the rest of the thing.

Speaker 1 Actually, yeah, we should do an episode.

Speaker 6 Just Che reading the entire list of MLBs.

Speaker 1 Baseball almanac.

Speaker 1 Che reads.

Speaker 3 I think we nailed this. Yeah, that was fun.
Felt good.

Speaker 6 One thing I know about this draft, though, is we have no idea how any team's going to do. No.

Speaker 1 Well,

Speaker 3 we do know that some teams are going to have players that are playing and some teams are not. Yes, correct.

Speaker 6 Hank has an injured guy, too.

Speaker 3 Your whole team would have been injured if we didn't change the rules.

Speaker 1 Yeah, if Strout.

Speaker 1 No, would have had Junketta. Seven injured right there.
Trout and Mookie bets.

Speaker 6 I did not know that Mookie was injured.

Speaker 1 Or

Speaker 1 Trout hurt. Or Stan.

Speaker 3 Mookie was hurt.

Speaker 1 Stan's always hurt.

Speaker 1 Mookie was famous.

Speaker 3 I'm pretty sure before this draft started, you were like, by the way,

Speaker 3 yes, you were.

Speaker 1 You were like, I'm going to draft based on availability because R L and D always gets hurt. Yeah.

Speaker 1 But he threw it.

Speaker 6 Do you actually think I threw it? Yes.

Speaker 1 When you picked Trout, I thought you were throwing it.

Speaker 1 That was the third pick in a row of very injured guys.

Speaker 6 I promise you, I did not intentionally try to throw this. Last year, I got fucked because a guy got injured right before we did the draft.

Speaker 1 So, you're just getting your injuries out of the way.

Speaker 6 This one,

Speaker 6 I was not prepared for.

Speaker 1 Yeah, this sheet didn't do anything. Yeah, this is a bad sheet.

Speaker 6 This is a useless sheet. I regret using the sheet.

Speaker 1 We should cut out Ebo's question.

Speaker 6 If I knew I wasn't relying on the sheet, I would have done more prep.

Speaker 6 But that's how it breaks. And I have my team, and I'm confident.

Speaker 1 Team is on the floor, right? So one adder drop for an injury. Mm-hmm.

Speaker 1 And now? Or pedophilia? Not now. No, not now.
Although PFT could do now.

Speaker 6 In the spirit of fairness, though, I'd like to just say I will sacrifice my drop because I was allowed to drop Mike Trout. And that would have made me fishing last, probably.

Speaker 1 No, it's okay. You can, no, no.
You don't have to sacrifice your...

Speaker 1 Okay. Mike Trout was.

Speaker 1 You got to keep your pedophile drop. Yeah.

Speaker 6 Oh, no, I'm keeping that one. Who knows what's coming down the road?

Speaker 1 Yeah, those are separate, by the way. Oh, there's an injury drop and a pedophile drop.

Speaker 6 There's a pedophilia. Yeah, it's like IR, except.
Let's hope none of us have to use

Speaker 1 PR. Yeah.
What if it's Judge? Are you going to use yours, Dan?

Speaker 1 If what? If Judge was a pedophile. It's a good question.
But he wasn't suspended from the Yankees.

Speaker 6 He'd really earned his son.

Speaker 1 We'd have to assess the situation day by day. Fair.
I'm talking to the league offices.

Speaker 6 Wait for all the facts to come.

Speaker 1 I've had some conversations with Aaron himself.

Speaker 1 We're just making sure that we do the right thing.

Speaker 1 No further questions. Make the final judgment come October.
Yeah, exactly. All right, any last things? We're going to play some ball.
Yeah. Hit some dingers.
Have some fun.

Speaker 1 That it?

Speaker 1 Sure, sure. All right, boys.

Speaker 3 Meme said that he has Pug doing the numbers next door.

Speaker 1 Oh, okay. Let's do numbers.
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 Do we have... Let's get a FaceTime of them so we can see it.
All right, everyone, numbers.

Speaker 3 20.

Speaker 1 56. 23.

Speaker 3 24. You just look at at me like that.

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 3 You just looked at me so ferociously.

Speaker 1 Stephen? I like to look at you ferociously.

Speaker 1 26. It's a sign of respect in my culture.

Speaker 1 Three. Zah?

Speaker 1 Oh, hey, Pug.

Speaker 1 Pug, did you say your number? I'll do 33.

Speaker 1 Zah? 27. 27.
All right, go ahead. Run people in 20s.

Speaker 1 It's a lot of numbers, boys.

Speaker 1 Two.

Speaker 1 So close. Derek Cheater.

Speaker 6 Respect puck.

Speaker 1 Love you guys.

Speaker 1 Talking away.

Speaker 1 I know what

Speaker 1 I'm to say. I'll say it anyway.

Speaker 1 Today's a major day to find you shine away.

Speaker 1 Though I've been coming for your love of dreams, take

Speaker 1 on

Speaker 1 me.

Speaker 1 Bake

Speaker 1 me

Speaker 1 on.

Speaker 1 I'll

Speaker 1 be

Speaker 1 gone.

Speaker 1 Needless to say

Speaker 1 our hearts and ends.

Speaker 1 But be stone a little way.

Speaker 1 Let me learn why yourself can

Speaker 1 say after me.

Speaker 1 It's no better to be safe than sorry.

Speaker 1 Take

Speaker 1 on

Speaker 1 me.

Speaker 1 Take

Speaker 1 me

Speaker 1 up.

Speaker 1 I'll be

Speaker 1 gone

Speaker 1 and a day of change.

Speaker 1 All the things that we say

Speaker 1 lies for just to flame our memories away.

Speaker 1 You're all the things I've got to remember.

Speaker 1 You're shy and away.

Speaker 1 You're all coming here anyway,

Speaker 1 they

Speaker 1 gon'

Speaker 1 leave

Speaker 1 me

Speaker 1 up.

Speaker 1 I

Speaker 1 be

Speaker 1 gone.