NHL With Keith Yandle, Fixing The All Star Game + Hank Makes A Terrible Bet On His Future Self

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On today's Pardon My Take, we are back in studio. Good to see everyone.
Some sun tans. Did you get a little tan? I was out on the course.
I got flushed. I got a little tan.
Hank got a little tan. A little sunburn.
Jake, you get a little sunburn? Yeah, a little bit, but I put on some sunburn. Max is sick.
I want to get that golfer's tan. Was it Paul Azinger that had that one or Stuart Sink? Stuart Sink.
With a head that was just white. Yeah, you need a bald head, though.
Yeah, that one rocks. Well, just wait a couple years.
Yeah. We have a great show, though.
We're back in studio. We're going to talk.
Maybe a little fix on the NBA All-Star game because people are very upset about it. Hot seat, cool thrown.
Hank, are you debuting your top 10 Patriots? I have it. He has it.
He's done it. Maybe we'll push it off now that we know you have it.
Well, I was going to say, I know I didn't want to be unprepared, but maybe waiting until the end of the series. Okay, all right.
That's a good idea. But I have my current one.
But did you do this or did you have somebody else help you out? I did it. He did it.
Did you put the lighthouse on? The old lighthouse. Maybe.
That should be on the lights. Not the old lighthouse.
We have a great interview with our good friend Keith Yandel talking hockey. This is the week where we're catching up on all of our sports.
We did NBA preview with Rusilla on Monday. We have Keith Yandel talking hockey today.
I think we're going to have Titus do some college basketball preview on Friday. It's new life for this show.
And then we also, at the end of the episode, we're taking listener suggestions on life after football. So what, what their plans are for what, what to do with life without football.
We should circle back to on, on the things that we said that we were going to do after football was over last year. Oh, do we have that list? I have that list.
All right. So we'll do that.
That's great. That's great.
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Okay, let's go. It's part of my take presented by Barstool Sports.
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Today is Wednesday, February 21st, and the boys are back in studio.

The boys are back.

The boys are back.

The boys are back the boys are back the boys are back kind of rocks being back in studio not gonna lie i'm gonna fade it out guess who just got back today remember when it was rex ryan and rob ryan walking together yeah play that song that was the coolest fucking video ever uh we're back we're back it is uh great to be back from vacation everyone feels rested well i did feel rested big cat until i watched the nba all-star game oh and man did i expect more out of that one puke uh so i actually didn't watch the nba all-star game i did not either i've never felt smarter in my entire life, watched all the highlights, of which there were one or two. The highlight was really Adam Silver after the game telling it was the Eastern Conference one.
Congratulations on, I guess, scoring the most points tonight. Yes.
No, I thought so. So there was that highlight.
But the real highlight for me was Bob Ryan tweeting, if you're not personally offended by this, he wrote but, but I assume he meant by, if you're not personally offended by this disgraceful farce taking place right now in Indy, you don't love or understand basketball. These quote unquote all-stars should be censured and where are the coaches? Have any of them have any pride? They're all acting like athletic court gestures.

I love that.

I would like to see a coach try to get players to play in the All-Star game.

Like, have them do suicides before the game.

Have them go out there running three-man weave.

Like, let's get, come on, let's lock in.

Do a full-court press.

Yeah, well, there's another one.

He had one earlier that I missed.

He said, once again, these NBA stars are showing no respect for the game.

It's another dunk-a-rama and three-point farce. Not a single hand in anyone's face.
I'll see how TCM is doing. See you next year.
What a waste of time. Adam, you must do something.
It's embarrassing for your sport. Adam.
Adam Silver, though, is he the number one commissioner now? Yeah, he doesn't do shit. Well, he just gets bullied by everyone yeah that's his job i mean roger goodell he does get bullied but he gets bullied by the owners do you know what adam silver's biggest problem was was timing timing is everything in life he came in and was commissioner and you remember what happened right when he was commissioner i think he was like two months in it was a donald sterling and he banned him for life and everyone's like this He gets it.
He is the best. And it's been all downhill from there.
Yeah. Literally, you can't.
You got to wait for those easy wins. You know what he should have done? He should have said, we're going to wait and see with Donald Sterling.
Put it in his back pocket. Waited until there was an all-star crisis at hand.
And then been like, oh, yeah, that Donald Sterling guy, is he even still alive?

Is he?

No.

I think he is.

No, I think he's dead.

Boom.

He's suspended for life.

Alive.

He should have waited. Oh, really?

Tied.

89.

89.

According to Wikipedia.

He's got that.

When Donald Sterling dies, Adam Silver should release a statement that just says, good.

Yeah.

Adam Silver.

Remember when I banned him?

Yeah.

Anytime we mention Donald Sterling, we have to read the transcript from his 2003 deposition.

And also, big Magic Johnson.

Big Magic Johnson.

What did he ever do?

So here's- Adam Silver. Remember when I banned him? Yeah.
Anytime we mention Donald Sterling, we have to read the transcript from his 2003 deposition. And also, big Magic Johnson.
Big Magic Johnson. What do you ever do? He got AIDS! Here's Donald Sterling's words from this deposition, 2003, former owner of the Clippers.
Well, I fool around sometimes. I do.
When a girl seduces me and tells me all these hot stories and dirty things and tells me how much she wants to suck on me and takes my shoes off and licks my feet and touches me, when I'm in limousine she takes off all her clothes the limo driver said what's going on and she starts sucking on me on the way to mr coon's house and i thank her i thank her for making me feel good then the lawyer sir the question was is this your handwriting love it it literally was michael scott deposition it rocks yeah in real life but i i have some fixes for the all-star game i do too okay go ahead no you go ahead go ahead i have some some that are not gonna work but thank you go ahead you go ahead you got a fix all right my first fix is uh on the losing team one person dies that's a good fix do you don't think they would try hard it's like the lottery yeah yeah we just do a we we just take names out of a hat right after it's like up luca sorry you're dead yeah the mystery're dead. Yeah.
The mystery knife would play, too, in that circumstance. It would be great.
Yeah, that's a good idea. That one's a little – I understand that one probably is going to – we're going to need to get a little bit further in the crisis to get that one enacted, but don't rule it out.
It would kind of rock, though, if LeBron's team lost and then the players vote on who gets killed. Yeah.
And they vote LeBron off. Oh, okay.
Yeah. I saw you had a similar idea to this, Big Cat cat but we talked about this for the pro bowl game because we fixed the pro bowl too yeah and the solution to that was uh one are all the players on the winning team get to hit free agency one year early yeah and I did the reverse where all all if you play the NBA all-star game losing team has one player that can never be an all-star again yeah I like that yeah so.
Yeah. So it's like that loses out on cash.
Ban him. Yeah.
Winning team gets to dress the losing team for the rest of the year. I like that.
I had some rest of the year ones. Losing team can't tie their shoes for the rest of the season.
Okay, that's cool. That'd be pretty funny.
Losing team has to fly southwest for the rest of the season. Southwest is fine.
I flew it this morning. Hank disagrees.
Not for NBA players. Yeah.
Barbaric. What about this? What about the Rashard Mendenhall rules? What if we make the All-Star game white versus black? Oh, okay.
So who's the white starting five? Luka. Luka.
Caruso. Jokic.
Caruso. Chris Stapps.
Chris Stapps. Grayson Allen.
Peyton Pritchard. Peyton Pritchard.
Mack McClung. Mack McClung.
I'd put that five up against you. There's got to be a Plumlee out there.
And then who's on the other team? Everyone else. Yeah, literally everyone else.
How about this one? This one would actually be really brutal. Losing team has to be the video crew for LeBron's farewell tour.
Okay, yeah. They can't play basketball for at least a year, probably two.
This one would be fun. Losing team draws out of a hat and the loser that person's team has to give darko 20 minutes a game for the rest of the season okay let's get darko back in yeah sure what the fuck well if darko was getting 20 minutes on the bucks he might be great we don't know i have a real one though okay i actually think would work i got another one okay go ahead you go this kind of straddles the line of real and maybe not real what if the number one team in college basketball got to play against the all-stars because they killed they'd at least try they would try they would have to try they would because like the threat of being embarrassed by the number one team that's true that would be enough to make the guys actually go out there and do something cool i saw some people saying they should do u.s versus the world That would be good.
I mean, maybe you'd have a little bit of pride. Yeah.
But I had so, the problem is the in-season tournament, not only does it have, you know, you win a championship in Vegas, but there's money involved. People are saying, well, you need to get money involved in the All-Star game.
The problem is, though, the All-Star game money involved, all those guys get paid so much money the the in-season tournament works because the stars are playing for the last guy on the bench like I remember wasn't it the Pacers were in the final of it and it was like three or four guys are making you know 10 million dollars a year but everyone else is getting paid nothing so they're playing for half a million dollars that means something what if it was losing team or sorry, winning team gets money out of the losing team's pocket, but we went one further.

So the losing team literally has to pay the winning team.

So now it's money out of your pocket.

Losing team has to pay winning team $10,000 per point.

Oh, because now you play defense.

Yeah, you play defense and it doesn't matter if you're losing.

You still trying.

Yeah, correct. Not a bad idea.
Right. And you have to pay them in $1 bills.
Yeah. And it takes place in the bigs.
But Dame would have gotten $500,000. He scored 50, right? Yeah.
Did he? Was it 50? I thought he scored 50. Did he not score 50? No, it was 39.
He scored a lot of points. We didn't watch the game.
We didn't watch the game. So it's good for us because we can't get upset about it.
Trey Young and Donovan Mitchell actually had a decent idea. I think that would probably work.
They told this to Rachel Nichols after the game. They said, get an emcee out there.
So have a guy like at the end, one mixtape or like at Rucker Park that's on the court narrating the game as it happens. Roasting them.
Yeah, roasting you if you get crossed up. Oh, what if the winning team immediately after the game had to go and in the back room it was Club Shea Shea and they got to just bash the losing team? I like that, yeah.
That would be bad. Good idea.
That would be very bad. What if you had Ben Simmons and he's just shooting on a hoop out to the side and he has to score 100 points on his own, only three-pointers, in the time that both teams have to get over 100 points.

He wouldn't.

What do you mean?

So, like, he's on a hoop all by himself.

Right.

Not scoring.

The other teams are playing each other.

Right.

And he has to score 100 points on his own.

Oh, so it's a challenge for Ben Simmons.

Challenge for Ben Simmons.

Yes, I like it.

Ben Simmons can beat the two teams to 100 points. He cannot.
He cannot. What if the game doesn't end until they hit 41 free throws in a row? Oh.
He'd still be there. He'd be there forever.
Unless they got Scott Morris from UNH. Shout out.
Or Spencer. Was that the guy's name? Spencer the Ringer.
The Ringer. The Ringer.
Yeah, the Ringer guy. By the way, we have shirts.
Hank, go grab one of the shirts. We have the 41 free throw shirts.
I don't know about you guys, but I don't think I said this on Sunday's pod, but I got to Mexico, and I got to the house, and I immediately slept for eight more hours. Yeah.
It was the first day of vacation. I was like, I'm going to do some more sleeping.
Yeah, you forget how much an all-nighter takes away your entire world. Yeah.
You don't feel like you're alive for about two days. And you convince yourself you're not tired tired and then you like close your eyes for one second and eight hours go by yeah i'll be 41 free throws i really do think that the paying the the losing team paying the winning team would work because guys don't want to lose money and especially if you if you tied it into the point total guys would play defense but at the end of the day who cares right mean, it's the NBA All-Star game.
Yeah, if you expected anything besides this, the only reason why you might be expecting something different was Adam Silver did say, I think in November, that we're not going to have an embarrassing All-Star game. You're going to be entertained.
Yeah. So that was a fucking lie.
And he just, again, those players run his life. They're like, oh, yeah? We're going to make it even more embarrassing.
But, yeah, other than baseball, I know hockey, people were saying that hockey has done a better job, but, like, baseball is the only all-star game that really – and that even has lost a little bit of its allure because it used to be, dating ourselves, when there was an interleague play, it was like, oh, fuck, I can't wait to see this matchup. We'll never see this matchup again.
Yeah. But baseball still has a little bit of a lure because guys are still throwing hard and trying to hit.
Yeah, football just gave up. Yeah, they did, which was smart.
Which was smart. Because now no one expects anything out of them.
Yeah. NBA should just give up.
Why? It's way easier to give up. It's way easier to give up.
Then people can't complain. The football one, they get the advantage because it's the end of the year.
Yeah. But even basketball they will ask what you just tie it in the in-season tournament do that later in the year yeah i really think the money thing is the only thing to save and it can't be that the winning team gets money it has to be tied into the losing team losing money because the like i said that all the guys are getting paid a ton of money i don't think i don't think if you said a hundred thousand000 to every winner on the All-Star team, yeah, obviously $100,000, but some of these guys are making $55 million a year.
What do they care? It's not going to be like, oh, I'm going to try way harder now. What if all of the All-Stars, you get selected? Because the other thing with the contracts is that's built into your contract if you make All-Star team.
Right, that's what I'm saying. That's why you should lose.
One person should never be All-Star again. What if every All-Star has to volunteer a player on their behalf and then it's for money? Oh, I like that.
This guy's got to pay. No, this guy or this guy gets paid.
Oh, I like that. I like that.
You get the last guy on your bench. You're like, I want to get him paid.
But you also have to work with your other All-St on like getting the best team together so your team can win yeah okay well we fix the all-star or if it was money what if it was money that got paid to whatever college you went to if you went to college because a lot of those guys they like gassing up their alumni yeah i think a lot of them don't you don't think so well they only went for like a year a lot of them yeah in zion's playing for the brotherhood yeah for sure yeah he's definitely still playing absolutely absolutely 100 um we the other thing that came out of this weekend the nba weekend is doc rivers is really unlikable yeah holy shit what'd you use a snake he so he uh had the balls to after taking someone's job and saying he wasn't, he was working for the Bucs as an analyst, took the job, took Jeff Gundy's job, and then was like, yeah, I'm good with his announcer stuff.

I'll be the Bucs head coach, and we'll fire Adrian Griffin, whatever, 40 games into the season.

Doc Rivers had the balls to say it was a tough time for him to take the job.

He said, taking a job when you're about to go on the toughest road trip of the season is not the smartest decision.

I think it's a tough time for him to take the job. He said, taking a job when you're about to go on the toughest road trip of the season is not the smartest decision.
I even told them that. Can we wait till All-Star break? You know, it would have been a lot nicer.
Yeah, it would have been nicer for sure. It would have been great.
You get like a month of prep time. Yeah, good job, Doc.
You got the job. You can't complain about a job that you stabbed somebody in the back for.
He also had a, I'm pulling it up, he had a quote where it actually sounded like when Dave does his bit with excuses, like not to make excuses, then rattles off a bunch of excuses. Listen to these.
Listen to Doc River explain the start he had with the Bucs. Yeah, just, you know, the Utah game, you kind of knew, you know, altitude, back-to-back.
I mean, whoever's scheduled at Dallas, Utah, have never been on an airplane in their life, you know, or no time zones, you know. So that was just a tough one.
We knew that. I guarantee you when they looked at that before the year started, they were like, this was going to be a brutal game for us.
End of a trip, legs can just see it we've got a lot of injuries right now so guys are playing more extended minutes i think that's probably you know what blue season el nino so he went he went uh altitude schedule time zones fatigue injuries defense that's about it in 30 seconds it's a royal flush yeah yeah there's not really you, I've heard people throw El Nino into a lot of shit. He should have put that in there.
What does that mean? It's a leap year. We've got extra days this month.
Going from Dallas to Utah. Everybody knows.
Time zones and altitude. You go from Dallas to Utah.
You might as well be going through hell. It's the toughest road trip in America.
That's really hard. What else do you want us to do?

Dallas, Utah.

Next, you're going to say Sacramento?

Yeah.

Oh, man.

So, yeah, Doc Rivers, good job coming back and really making everyone be like,

wait, why do people like this guy?

Yeah, I don't like Doc.

Yeah.

Hank?

I mean, he's a championship winning coach.

What's not to like?

All right, what else do we got going on in the sports world? Pitchers and catchers did report. Yeah.
And there's a bunch of baseball players that aren't signed yet. Yeah.
That was one of my hot seats. I don't know what's going to happen with that.
All right. We'll save it for hot seat, cool throne.
I'm excited about baseball, though. I'm excited about baseball as well.
Dingers only? Yeah. Oh, yeah.
We're doing dingers only again. Yes.
No hit by pitches? No hit byes, just dingers. So we should set a date.
Yeah, we'll set a date.

Let's say June 20th. Oh, we're going to do mid-season?

Well, we don't have to do the start of the season.

Yeah, not the start of the season.

It's cold.

Yeah.

Also, what's going to be an interesting twist is we're going to have to figure out how to disable notifications on our phone for every player that we had hitting home runs.

Yeah, I just got a Brandon Lau injury update.

That's tough. So we can do 4th of July, one of of the episodes again we should be able to keep one guy though keep a keeper league a keeper league yeah you get to keep one dinger you know what we should do is we should draft this is what we should do is you draft our team before opening day and every week you get to add one guy to your active roster till we get the full roster.
I like that. So you have to guess.

Yeah, one guy that you're really excited.

Yes, you have to guess.

That's a nice way to also ease in.

Yeah, ease in.

First week, you're just rooting for one dude to go yards.

Second week, you got two guys you can keep track of.

Yeah, it's like the Royal Rumble of Dinger's home.

Uh-huh.

Opening day in South Korea, March 28th.

Who cares?

Oh, wait.

They're playing in South Korea.

Oh, okay. I think it's an opening day for South Korea.
I was like, who cares about that? Dodgers Padres in South Korea. Sorry, March 20th.
March 20th. All right, well, we're not going to be doing that.
What kind of time zone is that going to be? Isn't that first day of March Madness? Yeah, right around there. That's really stupid.
Great job, baseball. Yeah.
Way to go, baseball. They're a week before everyone else.
March 28th is everyone else. What should the punishment be this year? I like something baseball related.
Yeah, it was good. This year's punishment was good.
Just run it back. We could run it back.
We could also do you get hit by a 90-mile-an-hour fastball. That'd be fun.
That sounds fun. That does sound fun.
Maybe you have to just face a college pitcher until you can... Oh, you know what we should do is we should run it back, but the loser also has to bat.
Yeah. Yeah.
Because I think facing against a college pitcher would be terrifying. Yeah, the loser has to be Shohei.
Yeah, and you have to keep taking it bats until you get a base hit. Yeah.
Oh, that will take forever. Maybe we won't put in that stipulation.
We'll refine it but yeah i like doing i think we should run it back let's do that you gotta get a hit shut up max you're sick i'm fine no i mean you're sick in the head oh okay yeah and a baseball and and a baseball you're so sick uh hank do you want to do your top 10 Patriots? Yeah. So this could change.
Yeah, because I said I would do it. We were debating it.
And then I was watching the first two episodes of, I'm sorry, Dynasty. I've heard, and I haven't watched it yet, but we'll all watch it so that we can review it together.
But I've heard the crafts are spin zoning stuff. That's just what the have seen they're heavily featured you just listen to kirk no that wasn't just kirk did say but i've seen tweets too being like i think simmons even said the crafts were spins that kirk's yeah i mean i i wasn't around obviously my first mem like watching it i was like holy shit i was literally nine years old when this started uh people are saying that they made it seem like the patriots are really bad before brady and they actually weren't with parcells and pete carroll it was a super bowl yeah so they they do focus a little bit on the crafts and it's told from his point of view kind of but you have to almost tell it from his point of view because he's the one that made the decisions right like bringing in belichick and then belichick deciding drew bledsoe or tom brady and then craft like signing off on that and trusting him so like you do have to tell his side of the story by far my favorite part of it so far is ernie adams you get so much already and ernie adams um he might be on a white whale list of ours yeah he's he's a very interesting guy so he's driving out of his house which is a very nice Dude drives a Subaru.
Of course. It's like a classic Subaru.
Love that guy. Yeah.
I wouldn't expect him to drive anything else. It would be either a Subaru or like a Corolla.
Yeah. Nothing more.
Like 1997 Toyota Camry. Yeah, nothing more.
It's going to be painful waiting week in and week out for all the episodes. I think there's 10 episodes.
There are only two out right now. and I think after this week, it goes one by one by one.
Dude, it hurts. Our brains have been- I was feeding more last night.
Yeah, I started watching this new show on Hulu, and I watched the first two episodes and realized that it was every week, and it devastated me because I cannot remember week to week anything. Yeah.
I need to be able to binge. I actually think what the streaming services should do, because when you binge, you watch it so fast, you don't remember anything.
But when it's week to week, you watch it so slow, you don't remember anything. They need to basically put like, we're a bunch of like Labradors trying to eat our food out of a bowl, the spiral bowls.
It should be like, once you start an an episode you can watch three episodes in one day

yeah and then the next day you can watch three episodes yeah i mean so it's like a they basically control your binging i i started the the patriots dynasty show and then when i got to the end of the available ones i kept clicking on the third one even though it said like coming out march 3rd or whenever and i was like no that must be a mistake show me more do it netflix or apple do a Do a controlled binge so we can save ourselves from ourselves but also we can remember what the fuck's going on because you guys know when you binge something you do those like you you'll watch like four episodes in one night and you're like ah fuck i'll do there's a cliffhanger i'll watch the fifth and barely remember because you're falling asleep yeah give me three a day three a day would be perfect more. I need more stat.
Really, really well done. It only gets up to the snowball is the end of the second episode.
So there's still a lot left. How many episodes are there? Ten.
So they haven't even won a Super Bowl in the first two episodes. No.
That's pretty crazy. Yeah.
And like I said, I was nine. My first, you know, the beginning montage was really, really good.
And I was like, holy. Like, first it hurt a little bit because I realized I was like, damn, this is just history now.
This is not. This was my life.
This is what I lived every day being like, oh, this is the best team in the world. During that montage, I was like, oh, this is over.
Like, this is. Yeah.
We're watching a documentary. This is all in the past.
Yeah. I actually, I was thinking about this.
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Again, create an account use code pmt for 20 off your first purchase terms apply again create an account redeem code pmt for 20 off download game time today last minute tickets lowest price guaranteed all right hank i had this question popped in my head because did matthew slater retire today okay maybe jake you can look it up but how many patriots on the current roster have a soup bowl like that will be the moment when if they if you get to a point where it's because it has to happen at some point in the next couple years where no one on that team that many i was thinking about it like if they go if say the patriots went to the playoffs in two years and everyone's like well it's the patriots are in their playoffs like wait but none of these guys have have been there for that yeah it can't be a bunch linemen and yeah like special teamers yeah because I they also

cut a couple guys and I was like huh I wonder I wonder what the longest tenured Patriot is right

now yeah I was probably under 10 I mean David Andrews that's what I'm saying linemen memes

credit linemen probably definitely do I would say it's under 10 yeah that's crazy to think and they

release their whole

Thank you. Probably under 10.
I mean, David Andrews. That's what I'm saying.
Lineman. Memes credit.
Lineman probably definitely do. I would say it's under 10.
Yeah. That's crazy to think.
And they released their whole coaching staff and it was like all brand new faces. This documentary is one of the first times, maybe the first time that I've watched a documentary about something where I remember like every single minute of all this stuff happening.
I remember when Tom Brady came in for Drew Bledsoe. And Linsinsanity linsanity yeah yeah but no but this is no no i know this is the first one where i watch like the clothes and technology yeah that people are using during the the footage and i'm like holy shit that feels like it looks like that's the 80s yeah like 1999 in terms of the big ass like baggy white shirts and yeah the jeans that they're wearing the giant khakis they also had a hilarious clip of uh the sports reporter show yeah when like bob ryan was in it and i don't know lupica and a couple other guys where they're just an over oversized suits and they're just sitting on a stage cost and that was the show johnson morning before countdown it was just a hilarious, I remember the show vaguely but just watching it now being like they should bring that show do you want to get hot takes off, just put four old guys in chairs on a stage an NFL matchup was also in that early Sunday morning just four guys that are just like sitting in newsrooms just pissed off at the world let them go free there was some old vintage Collinsworth was saying, like, I don't think this is the right move to bench Bledsoe.
Like, I don't know about this kid Brady. And Collinsworth had a little bit less hair in the year 2001, which is interesting.
Yeah. I sent you guys the chart of how the Patriots were built via the Patriots game notes.
So aside from Slater no one's been on the team prior to 2015 so yeah but there's that they won three Super Bowls or two Super Bowls right Joe Cardona is he still on the team that was this was as of this year yeah Lawrence guy he just got cut yeah so that was that was what it was it wasn't Slater it was he got cut and they were like he's he was on the team for seven years like huh i wonder i wonder at what point you get to like no one left uh okay hank you ready yeah there's only if there's only like six right very few yeah very few okay ready hank yeah you starting at 10 1? 10. You want me to start? Start at 10.
I want you to start at 6. Go 6 to 1, 10, 9, 8, 7.
1, 2. All right.
Number 6. A lot of the defense I took from the early dynasty.
Okay. But this one guy, two Super Bowls, you wouldn't have won without him.
He stopped Marshawn Lynch on the one-yard line, basically arm tackled the guy, then took him down. Wow.
And he forced a fumble against the Falcons. Malcolm Butler.
Dante Hightower. Oh.
Whoops. Two plays where when you're watching him, you're like, we need a miracle.
He's the guy. He's the guy.
He's number six. Number six.
Wow. That's pretty high.
Can't wait to see who's 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, 10 sets. Should we debut this one by one? Should we just do number six? Tune in on Friday.
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Okay. Number five will be on Friday.
Good start. Good start, Hank.
Number six, Dante Hightower. We'll make a big threat out of it.
That was huge. Yeah, but then people are going to get in my head.
But no, I have it locked in. Send it to Jake, and he'll make sure it stays locked in.
Tune in Friday. We get number five.
This is right to what you were saying about the Netflix thing. Yeah.
It's going to be one thing, and people are going to be pissed. This is how you do off-season sports radio.
Yeah. Okay? You as long as possible.
This is going to be a month-long Hank's top 10 Patriots extravagant. And we're going to find out one and still have to do 10, 9, 8, 7, 6.
Who do you think number one is? Big Cat? Okay, that was sexy. I'm very interested to see who number two is.
Wait, you sent me 12. Oh.
Yeah, well one's an honorable mention and one's the lighthouse I'll spoiler okay but that one doesn't really the new one yeah that hasn't won shit we should have started with our honorable mentions I only have one on the list what's your honorable mention on Friday will debut Dante Hightower me is just my favorite player as a kid. Bethel Johnson.
Kicker Turner. Okay.
Electric. Okay.
All right. So five on Friday.
Five on Friday. All right.
Defense. Oh.
Teddy Bruschi. No.
Mike Vrabel. Nope.
Vince Wilford. Nope.
Dale Revis. Nope.
Albert Hainsworth. No.
Malcolm Butler. Nope.
Richard Seymour Willie McGinnis Jared Mayo He's been in both episodes I haven't watched yet Owns't know we don't know we don't know who it is number five make him tune in who's is for offense yep oh that's gotta be uh jules receiver and recurring guest of the show.

It's got to be Jules.

Cordero Patterson.

It's Jules.

Dante Stallworth.

So Gronk's two or three?

He's got to be three, and then Brady's got to be two.

No, Brady's one.

Brady's one.

Bill's two.

Are these old players? No, players only.

Players only.

Players only.

Players only.

Okay.

He wouldn't do Vrabel two.

Oh, no, Vince Wolfolk two. Gronk three.
Brady 1. I think Gronk's probably 2, Brady 1.
You guys both have one of those things. Okay, all right.
Well, it's Friday for number 5. Did you – Vince Wolfork 7 through 10? Yeah.
Wow. I can't wait until we do – The only one, 2 – All right, the big thing that I had – You had to factor in, though, is like.
Don't tell it. Don't spoil it.
No, but my grading system isn't based purely on stats. No, it's your life.
Rings is a major factor. Yeah.
Vibes is a major factor. There's so many guys that won three Super Bowls.
It's hard to credit them. I wouldn't.
But Randy Moss, Vibes guy. Could we get a breakdown? So on Friday when we do number five, can we get like, I would like in the balls scale, one through five, like give us rings, give us vibes.
Yeah. X Factor.
Will Fork is the only person to win in both dynasties, besides Brady, obviously. But that's a huge.
It's a big one, yeah. It's a big one.
I can't wait. He won, and then he suffered through the bad years, which they were good years.
They just went to Super Bowls. He went to Super Bowls.
But he came out the other side. Can you imagine the anticipation after Hank debuts his number eight Patriot, and then we have to wait two more days to get the final and last number seven Patriot? Seventh, yeah.
It's going to be crazy. All right.
A lot of great players. Let's do Hot Seat Cool Throne, then we'll get to our interview with Keith Yandel.
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Hank. My hot seat

is Anthony Rendon. Yeah.

People are big mad. I feel like

athletes say this exact quote all the time

though. Yes.
Want to read it?

It does seem like something that's getting a little bit

over-exaggerated, but he said

baseball's never been a top priority

for me. This is a job I do is to make

a living. My faith, my family come first before this job.
So if those things come before it, I'm leaving. And people are freaking out.
He's got a $245 million contract. Makes a lot of money.
Makes a lot of money. He doesn't play a lot.
He also complained earlier in the offseason about wanting the season to be shorter, which is another thing most people want. Yeah.
But I do feel like all players across the board, it's like a stereotypical answer to be like, my family comes first no matter what. I agree with that.
I think the other problem he runs into, not just the money, is that he plays for the Angels. Yeah.
And that's like the vibe of the Angels. Yeah.
The Angels, as an organization, baseball is not their top priority. It used to be that way with the Padres too.
Right. But yeah, I think a lot of players feel this way, but you probably shouldn't say it.
Yeah. Like right before the season starts.
And after you're getting paid that much more. Yeah.
You never had that problem with him in D.C. Great player.
Yeah. It also kept on going.
The reporter said, is it a priority? He said, oh, it's a priority for sure because it's my job. I'm here, aren't I? Do you want want to be here i don't want to talk to you guys at seven in the morning or whatever time it is that that fair ruled it's relatable yeah so i think maybe that part where he's like i'm here he also might just he might have gotten bad vibes from the reporter true and just was giving him the most boring easy answers ever don't talk about that enough bad vibes from reporter that's.
That guy who went after Jameis for scoring that touchdown. Yeah, bad vibes.
Bad vibes. Okay, your cool throne? My cool throne, Dungeons & Dragons.
Yeah. We mentioned it, but Sunday or Monday, I was hungover from Sunday.
Were you hungover from Sunday or were you hungover from the things you did on Sunday? You were already hung over.

No, you were drunk on Sunday.

Yeah, so I was hung over yesterday, got back, watched the Dungeons & Dragons.

I was like, this is amazing.

I hadn't seen it yet.

The graphics are so good.

And I feel like because it was kind of during a break, we should give those guys their proper credit.

Yeah, shout out Trey.

Worth a watch.

They were incredible. I watched a good deal of it on friday when it came out it's i don't know how they do what they do no it's worth the watch go watch it thank you to tim woods our champion we'll probably do another one in i don't know four or five months when we get to july 4th so it was great to have him just around for a.
I wish we could just hire him to just be a vibes guy. Yeah.
Just have a game room with Tim Woods. Yeah.
We should go LARPing with him. Yeah.
Yes. So he mentioned that.
We'll do that for July 4th as well. Yes.
We have to do it. We have to do it.
Do like a two-day long LARP. It would be awesome.
Yeah. Get dressed up.
Yeah. Horses.
Just battle people. It sounds awesome.
Look at us. Planning our next vacation, but also planning our next content for vacation.
Love that. My other hot stuff.
I mean, embrace the bait. I was getting shit.
These new hats are on sale. And Gaz was saying I can't wear them because it's Chicago.
Chicago barstool. Yeah.
Barstool, Chicago. Yeah.
Yeah. Those are good hats.
Yeah. Yeah, we have all of our St.
Paddy's Day merch. Check it out.
Go buy it. But now I live in Chicago.
I can wear hats. We also did our St.
Paddy's Day merch. Very mean.
We just used Mook's face, who's one of our coworkers, and it could be any Irish guy. It's just like, this is Mook.
The leprechaun. Oh, have you guys seen the Irish baby? No.
Went viral yesterday? No. You guys got to check out the- Just look on Twitter.

Search Irish baby.

Irish baby.

Okay.

It's this Irish baby that's holding a Guinness.

And it looks like a 79-year-old. Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

The Irish baby rocks.

This guy's got some stories to tell.

That Irish baby could drink me under the table.

Yeah.

Babe, wake up.

The most Irish baby just dropped. Yeah, it's very Irish baby.
love it um my hot seat hanker done yep my hot seat is rick patino rick patino is back baby he's back giving some serious quotes and uh he dropped some heat a couple days ago he said we're so unathletic we can't guard anybody without fouling for me i've always enjoyed the and I'm not going to lie to you, this is the most unenjoyable experience of my lifetime. And he's got some pretty unenjoyable experiences.
Yes. And also some really enjoyable ones, although brief.
Yes. This has been so disappointing.
Look, Joel's slow laterally. He's not fast on the court.
Chris Ledlum is slow laterally. Sean Conway is slow laterally.
Brady's physically weak. Drissa is slow laterally.
And then he started talking shit about the team facilities. I mean, they did blow like a 20-point lead to Pug Seton Hall.
Yeah. I also saw, because he clearly made the guys run a shitload in the gym after.
He said finally broke 200 in stamina shooting tonight. Nah, Alin with 205.
Sean Conway comes close with 190. We got to get this drill.
Yeah. And do a challenge.
And see if we get better at stamina shooting. Yeah.
Like, can we break 200 in stamina shooting? It's got to be an insanely hard drill. If there's two words that come to mind when I think of Rick Pitino, it's definitely stamina shooting.
Yeah. He walked into that one.
Yeah. Come on, Rick.
I slipped on it. My cool throne is the orlando airport oh the orlando airport on the big time cool throne they are now selling passes for people to go inside the airport shop and dine chili's without getting on a plane chili's is pre-security chili's oh yeah okay so you can chili's already pre-security oh got it okay well that's still awesome it's still awesome it's so's still a box that you can go to the airport and eat the finest food.
Yeah, that's not awesome. That could be awesome.
Wait. Just go to the airport and don't go anywhere? The best part, well, we could be, I'm going to predict that we're going to see an uptick in airport-related violence because the one thing that airports have going for them right now is you can talk all the shit that you want in an airport bar and nobody's got a weapon yeah you know that no one's got a gun no one's got a knife there now we're going to see some stabbings in airports which america is long overdue for the imagine being late for your flight and in tsa there's a guy in front of you that just wants to go walk around the airport yeah drive you well i don't i don't think those guys have to go through TSA.
Oh, they don't? I don't think so. I don't know how it's going to work.
Yeah. But yeah, that would- Still would probably have to.
Maybe. I got random checked twice on the way home from Mexico.
Yeah, the ID check. Yeah.
Yeah. Didn't have anything.
Kind of always feel disappointed for the person when they're checking your bag and you're like, I don't have anything. Yeah.
It kind of wish I had something for you. They're never, they know that you don't have anything.
Right, like it'd be cool if you pulled out like a long knife or something. Oh shit, I forgot this in my bag.
Yeah, right. But I'm just like sitting there like, you're gonna be disappointed.
There's nothing. I got groped on my way back.
Big time groped going through security. Tire girl.
It was a guy. It has to be a guy guy yeah so you go through this scanner and then it it shot off the alerts right on my dick and then right on my butt and the guy looked at it he looked at me he was like i'm gonna have to uh give you an extended pat down now and he explained what was going to happen and then he did it and they really press like it was very awkward being around all these other people the guy's just like ramming his hand into your dick repeatedly.
Yeah. That was tough.
That was a tough move. I wish that I had something that I was packing that could be like, oh, shit, yeah, that's my gun.
Yeah. But no, he was just pressing my balls.
You know who I saw who's right behind me in security coming back from Mexico? Your guy, Michael Porter Jr. Oh, really? I had already burned my You Want to Come on our podcast for the month, so I didn't say anything to him.
You didn't say anything? Yeah, I did. I'm still a little gunny.
I think you get one of those a month. Yeah.
If you had a microphone in your backpack, you could have been like, oh, yeah, they found my microphone. I forgot to take that out because I do a podcast.
Podcast, Michael Porter Jr. Michael Porter Jr., if you're interested, new media.
That's going to kind of suck, though, because no one really recognized him. I don't know.
Just tall? You're an NBA champion. I feel like you want to get recognized a little bit.
Maybe, yeah. Yeah, have you ever been to the Knoxville airport? No.
So that one is- Yes. That TSA line is impressive.
Yes, I have. Because they've got, as you're winding through the ropes, they've got all these pictures of guns that they've confiscated from people flying out of that airport.

And I was like, this is a fuckload of guns.

There were like 10 pictures there.

And then I looked closer, and every single gun had been confiscated within the last two months.

Whoa.

They find a lot of guns at that airport.

You just forget your gun.

Have you guys noticed the pre-check and clear lines being longer than regular?

Yeah.

It's a new dilemma. I went through regular this morning.
No. Clear Plus is coming.
Yeah. It's already here.
I have both. No, no.
Plus Plus. No, it's already here.
Clear Plus. Clear Plus Plus is coming.
Whatever they're going to do, they're setting it up so that they're going to make you buy another thing. What I noticed, they rebranded Clear as now Clear Plus.
You get confused when you go to the airport. It's like, I don't know if I have Clear Plus.
But that means that there's another level coming that implies Clear Minus. They're intentionally making it harder for TSA and Clear so that we are going to buy a new one.
They have to, yeah. It's not really valuable anymore.
Savvy by them. Savvy by them.
Okay, so my hot seat is the Chicago Cubs because we are on day, I believe, 143 with Cody Bellinger not being signed. And he is still a free agent.
They had pitchers and catchers. We're getting to the point.
I really, really want the Cubs to sign him. We're getting to the point.
This is my favorite part of free agency where we have radio hosts offering free things. So David Kaplan, a friend of mine, he said that Lou Malnati's wife has offered free pizza for life for Cody Bellinger if he signs.
Is that code? I don't know. Is that like Hillary Clinton QAnon shit? Yeah, free pizza for life.
I am here right now because I want Cody Bellinger to be a cub. I'm going to offer something that I never thought I would offer, and I'm nervous about this because I don't think you'll agree, but I'm going to do it.
Cody Bellinger, because you're listening to this show, if you sign with the Chicago Cubs, I will send you Hank's Patriot list 5 through 10. 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.
How are you going to get it? Jake. And you know what? Ha ha, you idiot.
You sent it to Jake already. You know what? I'm going to match.
Yeah.

I'll send him five through one. Will you send

him ten through seven? I'll send him ten through seven

plus honorable mention plus

you get a bonus lighthouse. Yeah.
You won't have

to wait any longer, Cody.

Please sign with

the Cubs. So it's Cody, Blake Snell

still hasn't signed. There are a few other guys

like big names that haven't signed yet. I don't know what's going on.
Why not? Why not? Cody, you can also use our golf simulator anytime. To be fair, the owners are poor, and they don't have enough money to pay.
Yeah. Tom Ricketts, broke boy.
Yeah. I think they're all Boris guys, too.
No, they are. They are Boris guys.
Yeah. I know Cody's the Boris guy, and I think that's what's really holding it up.
So this is the C word,. I like you, Tom Ricketts, if you pay for Cody Bellinger.
This would be collusion against Scott Boris. Or Scott Boris is colluding against them to then claim counter-colluding.
So Scott Boris is asking for so much money that he can then say, they're colluding against me, and then he can file a lawsuit against them. What if Scott Boris isn't even answering the phone, and he's like, they're blackballing you.
We're going to take him to court. Scott Boris might be texting owners, and the owners are just so un-text savvy that they don't look at their phones.
Yeah. I don't know how to do the email on the phone.
Just call me. I think Scott Boris is probably playing it right because all these guys are going to, once the season starts, would we rather have Cody Bellinger or not? Yeah.
I think we would. Let's pay him.
There's a lot of good players out there. Yeah.
They should actually just do this every year. Boris should just make his own team.
Boris All-Stars. Yeah.
Well, then he'd have to pay them. True.
True. But then he gets a 10% cut, so it's really a discount.
That's true. That's true.
All right. My cool throne is Sydney Sweeney's boobs.

Oh, why?

That picture of her in the red dress, which I was getting shamed for.

Like, come on, guys.

The day you stop liking tits, kill me.

I think- And I die.

I'm going to say something controversial.

Yeah?

I think Sydney Sweeney's very attractive.

Yeah.

She's in her boobs.

I think she's a wonderful looking actress. Hosting SNL.
What's with guys snitching dry snitching on online now oh yeah what welcome my world yeah it's bullshit yeah i can't like a miley cyrus series of pictures from the grammy awards well this is why maybe we should abolish the bonk list no i think i think we need to embrace the bonk yeah like if you're if you're not getting bonked, then there's something wrong with you.

I'm a red-blooded American male, okay?

People trying to shame me, age shame me, kids shame me, life shame me.

Boobs are boobs.

I hit like on tweets and on pictures on Instagram, not because I'm horny, but because I'm trying

to support them.

Yeah.

And to be like, hey, great job posting this picture.

Also, Sidney Sweetie is like the most famous person right now.

It's not like a random porn star.

True.

What?

What's that, Hank?

What?

It's not.

Listen, I am with you.

Dry snitching shouldn't be happening.

Because of the bonk list, I get sent a lot of Big Cat's likes on Instagram.

And there's a lot of randoms. it that way not that many also uh rip cagney lynn carter porn star she died why don't we why don't we do highlight tapes after so you'll be cremated no saying like like when kobe died all we always saw was like highlights of ko mentality.
Right. Porn stars don't deserve that? They should, yeah.
They should. Just saying.
Right? It'd be a long day without you, my friend. Yeah, Sydney Street is hot.
There, I said it. She's really hot.
I think she's very attractive. I think she's very talented.
Very talented, but also very hot. I think that we should do a better job supporting.
Going to go see her new movie. Is the one where she wears a nun uniform the whole time? I think it's a Spider-Man movie.
Oh. Isn't there one that just came out where she wears a nun uniform all the time? Yeah.
I don't think I'm going to see that one. I would watch her wear a nun.
Nun clothes. Take that out.
That was too horny. It's called Immaculate.
Immaculate. In theaters March 22 March 22nd No she is a very good actress I mean listen Euphoria What was the White Lotus When's that coming back Yeah White Lotus needs to be back White Lotus was awesome But don't make us wait In between episodes Yeah Okay I think they released What the hotel was Oh they.
Yeah. Somewhere like that.
Jake,

what do you think about Sidney Sweeney's

boobs?

Yeah. Okay.
All right.

Nice. That's Jake's review.
That's Mr. Position.

That's a yeah. Hey, Max, what do you think

about Sidney Sweeney's boobs? Max is out on them.

Yeah, you're out? No, I like them.

Yeah, how much do you like them?

They're nice boobs.

For a while, we were shaming women for their breast size. I think Hank was talking about Madam Web, by the way.
Oh, yeah. Spider-Man.
I'm not going to see that either. How is she just in every movie? She's hard-working.
Incredibly hard-working. There's like three movies in the past three months.
Yeah, she's incredibly hard-working. Jake, your hot seat, Cool Tron.
My hot seat's notre dame we had the official announcement of how the college football playoff is going to construct their 12 team bracket and it was announced that the four highest ranked conference champions will be seeds one through four which means if notre dame is the best team in the country i thought it was five they would get the number five i think it's five yeah so the five seat yes five seats so that would be very funny if they just designed these rules and they're like yeah fuck you

Florida State again like we're gonna take we're gonna take all the other conferences but yeah

Notre Dame well there's only four left major yeah Notre Dame are they going to are they gonna have

to join the ACC I think they would join the Big Ten before the ACC and then so they take all their

other sports out of the ACC yeah because I don't think the ACC is long for this world yeah it would

be They would join the Big Ten before the ACC. And then, so they'd take all their other sports out of the ACC.
Yeah, because I don't think the ACC is long for this world.

Yeah.

It would be crazy if they joined the ACC.

So that would be wild, though, if they joined the Big Ten,

then you'd have, like, Notre Dame, Michigan, Ohio State.

Only one of them would get the top seed.

Correct.

Yeah, wild.

But this is a good way to do it.

I'm surprised you didn't put Justin Fields on the Bears on your hot seat. Oh, yeah.

Well, Jake, funny you say that, he unfollowed the Bears.

You know who he didn't unfollow?

Me.

Sick.

Yeah.

Tom Fernelli actually told me that.

That was my other thing watching the Dynasty documentary.

Oh, that wasn't about the Patriots.

Well, no, I'm wondering.

It was good that Brady had time to develop. He wasn't Tom Brady.
That was his second year in the league. If you have a rookie quarterback with a lot of pressure, it's hard.
That was an incredible segue. I was thinking about you when I was watching that documentary and being like, damn.
Justin Fields. I really wish we could somehow take events that happened in the past, bring them to modern day, and know what the discourse would be around them.
It's like the Tom Brady game manager Super Bowl winning discourse would be so fun to play. Oh, they threw that line in too.
Tom Brady's doing a really good job managing this game in one of the game highlights. He would have been going crazy for him.
But yeah, that's a good point about the Bears, Hank. Yeah, Justin Fields did unfollow the Bears.
Yeah, I don't think it's – I think he's probably going to get traded. Like I said, I mean, it could mean literally anything.
So it sounds like you're going to get Caleb. Yeah, it could mean anything like he doesn't want to play for the Bears anymore.
That could be one of the things. Or he hates the Bears.
It's the most passive. It could mean all of these things.
I think this is my least favorite recurring storyline in sports. When an athlete unfollows his teammates and the team official account on social media platforms, and then people do it in a story, and it's like, what does it mean? Well, it means that he did that because he wanted you to see that he did that, and then to make a story out of it.
Also, maybe it's just as simple as Justin Fields doesn't want to watch Bears highlights in his offseasonseason because it's not a lot of them yeah that's true like what he's like i just i kind of want to opt out on this content for the content was bad you can mute it and it wouldn't be a story he could mute it i would never unfollow any professional team that that i played for no i just like once once always who unfollows people on on social? Like if I follow you on Instagram,

I'm never unfollowing ever.

Ever.

I'm too lazy to do. Even if you are a porn star and die.

Yeah.

I'll keep that respect.

Because what if one day it posts again?

Right.

That's got to be such a nice surprise.

Yeah.

All right, Jake, your cool throne?

My cool throne is the shot of a lifetime.

Oh.

I'm back in the booth.

Jake is.

For some golf. Nice.
Next week on PGA Tour Live. Wow.
Hell yes. I'll be doing a couple of events with them this season.
First up, the Cognizant Classic in the Palm Beaches. We've got a great field that I've committed so far.
Rory, Ricky, Matthew Fitzpatrick, who's been on the show. No Max? I don't think we're gonna get Max Fuck Yeah But He probably has diarrhea butt From last week From all that In-N-Out Was it the In-N-Out That gave people the shit Is that what was happening They were claiming for Tiger Also you didn't eat In-N-Out in Vegas Hank You've changed Oh you did Oh okay Me and Jerry went after The DraftKings shoot.
Yeah. So tune in.
Oh, yeah. Come on.
I was with you. Yeah.
Yeah. I was worried that you didn't.
That's awesome, Jake. Everyone tune in.
Thank you. It did give me the shit stuff.
Oh, no. So I only had that going around.
Who else is on the call, Jake? TBD. Also, shout out the Water Dogs finishing second.
Good job, Mac. Mm-hmm.
You fucking loser. You said you wanted to lose.
Let's go Philly. Yeah, well, things change.

It's called material change.

It's called fluidity.

I think it's perfect.

Yeah, no, I didn't want to win that.

I did not want to win that.

It was fake.

Let's win the real thing, right?

It's preseason.

What are the Ravens?

No, we want to win the real deal.

This is basically the equivalent of the in-season tournament.

Don't want to win that either.

You can still hang a banner, and it means something.

No, it does not. But.
It does not mean anything when you win the in-season tournament. Don't want to win that either.
You can still hang a banner, and it means something. No, it does not.

But.

It does not mean anything when you win the in-season tournament.

Oh, yeah, Max does have to hang a banner second place.

Yeah.

No.

We agreed upon that, Max.

No.

I never agreed on anything.

We agreed on it.

You agreed on it.

I did agree on it.

You agreed on it.

Hang the banner.

Hang the banner. Hang the banner, bitch.
Okay okay let's get to our interview with keith yandel great interview talking hockey before we do that pft you got a quick word from one of our sponsors yeah before we get to keith yandel he's brought to you by raising canes i love raising canes basketball hockey and tomorrow even baseball will be in full swing that means it's a perfect time to kick back and relax with a Raising Cane's box combo and enjoy the game. You got the bread.
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There really is no other option. And now here's Keith Yandel.
Okay, we now welcome on our very good friend, recurring guest. It is Keith Yandel.
Many year hockey pro. How many years? 13? 13 year hockey pro in the NHL? 16.
16 years. So Yanz, I want to give Yanz credit off the bat.
It's the perfect spitting chiclets universe, okay? Down to you. You come in come in at the end here.
Uh, biz was supposed to come on. He was feeling under the weather cause he had to work two days in a row.
So I was like, he texted me this morning. He's like, Hey, I can't do it.
I'm, I'm feeling sick. So I texted wit wits on a boat in Florida.
And he's like, right after the boat, I'm going to golf. And he's like, but Yans is the best.
I the best I was like yeah I know Yans is the best so I texted you and you came to our rescue but you also gave me a little nugget of information that you have never in your life owned a computer yeah never have never will I think the most civilian thing you can ever do so what are you doing this on right now? His wife's computer. My wife's.
What does that mean? You've never owned a computer. You've never wanted to own a computer? No, no.
Zero interest. Until I have to get a real job.
That's your computer, though. Like, if it's your wife's computer, that's a family computer, right? No, it's like her work laptop.
So us calling you up you up like she's got to take a break from work right now because you got to use the one computer in your house well the kids have them too but i think they're at school um yeah and i was on a boat and golf this morning but still found a way to make this show that's a grinder that's a hockey player what about growing up like growing up you didn't have a computer for book reports things like that no did you guys have compute actually we got we got one when i got drafted it was like because um the year i got drafted was the walkout year so they did it all online and my parents went out and bought a computer um to see where i was gonna get drafted yeah that's i mean we are all of of of similar age, and it was – I remember we got our first computer in my house, like, it was like late, late 90s, and it was just one computer for everyone. So, like, when you start looking porn, you're like, oh, this is going to be bad.
You get a virus, you're like, fuck, the next person. Like, my mom's going to look up a recipe on this computer, and there's going to be pop-ups everywhere.
That was just, you had to go through some shit with the one family computer. Oh, yeah.
It was a grind downloading on Napster. Just hearing your dad coming up the stairs trying to delete things.
It wasn't good. So wait, when you were on the road for 16 years in the NHL, you never were like, hey, maybe I should get a computer? Like what did you do when you were on planes like watch a movie you just you just don't have a computer well when it first started it was remember everyone had those uh dvd players that like you flip up and then there'd be a so everyone would buy their own dvd player and then there'd be a ton of dvds on the plane uh so I'd just bring that and then um I mean I i have a uh um ipad oh okay that's computer adjacent the ipad have like the the keyboard that connects to it no god no i can't even type i love it because i fall asleep to my ipad i have it on like the desk next to my bed and i uh i just I strictly have it for that.
I have Netflix, Amazon, HBO, whatever, just on that just to watch before bed.

We got to get a typing contest between you and Biz,

because even though Biz owns, I'm assuming he's owned several computers in his lifetime,

I think you could still beat him.

Yeah, his buttons are probably all stuck together, though.

That's facts.

That's facts from the flu. All right, so we wanted yans on to talk a little hockey so uh we're we're now getting to the end of february we're getting what a month and a half away from playoff hockey my first question was what is the dog days of hockey what part of the season because we know it with you know football, you'll get to mid-season and you'll see some guys hitting the wall.
Baseball, you get to like mid-early, mid-August and it's like, oh man, this is a grind. What is that in the calendar for hockey players? I think they've gotten a lot better with it, especially, you know, my first, you know, maybe seven, ten years that it was just a grind.
Especially we were on some bad teams in Phoenix and guys are getting traded. Guys are hearing about getting traded.
So there's a lot of stuff going on behind the scenes where you're like, oh, God. Every day is just kind of like – and that was before the old – nowadays you get four days off a month.
That was before that. So you would practice in every day if your team was bad but nowadays it seems like you know the teams are well aware of that and you know they're putting together whether it's you know family trips uh mother trips father trips siblings trips uh i think they're doing a lot of good things like that but i remember a couple times in phoenix you know we would go to to Vegas for a couple days kind of have a team bonding play some golf hit the casino you know New York was really good with it as well if you had a couple couple games where you're in strictly cold weather we'd come down to Florida a couple days early to golf or whatever so I think I think the league the teams have done a really good.
And it's probably because a lot of GMs are ex-players now. So they kind of realize that those dog days are real.
But I think the majority of the thing is keeping it. The best thing was to have a rookie party around this time.
But if your team's out of it, then the coach is like, all right, we can't go too hard. You guys are playing like shit.
But and then if you're, you know, at the top of the ranks, then you're like, all right, we don't want to go too hard. We don't want to take our foot off the pedal here.
So it's kind of a little bit of a gray area in both. But it seems to me the last, you know, probably 10 years, the league's gotten really good about kind of taking care of these dog days and making things light and easy for the guys.
Yeah, you were talking about the rookies. The guy on the Bruins that made his debut yesterday, is it Morelli? Yeah.
Yeah, so he scored in his debut. And I was watching it and I thought to myself, I feel like there's a lot of rookies who score in their debut.
Is that a thing I'm up, or is that an actual thing in the NHL? It does seem a little bit more nowadays. Before it was, I think, my first game, I probably played seven minutes.
But nowadays, they're throwing guys into the fire, getting guys right into it, playing on the top lines, not really putting guys on fourth lines where they aren't getting chances. I think uh they're setting guys up for for for success but yeah it definitely definitely seems that way and how about the kid in in New York playing his first game the outdoor game fought first second of the game um I think it was on the anniversary of his dad passing away like six years before that too so that was a cool story as well yeah yeah I mean hockey always has

those cool stories that pop up I wanted to go back when you said you know you played on some bad teams how much does this part of the season suck if you're a bad team because I know like the Blackhawks are a very bad team Conor Berdada obviously just came back which is good but are like our guys like this just fucking sucks I want to get out of here bad. Yeah, you see a lot of guys either planning to go play world championships or planning their summer vacation right after the season.
So it's tough. And then the worst part is if your team's bad, then at the end of the day, it means people are going to get traded and, you know, you're losing friends.
You got to pack up your family and move. So a lot of things like that.
And then, you are bringing up guys from the minors then you know you're worried about your job you so there's no real downtime if you're if your team's playing bad you still got to produce and and go out there and give 100 effort um but there's definitely some some times during the seasons where you're like oh man we're really doing this again i can again. I can imagine.
Yeah. Especially like around this time of year where if there's no like real light at the end of the tunnel, you're just like, I guess I got to be a pro.
I guess I have to show that I'm professional. Yeah.
Yeah. You're waiting for the 15th and 30th payday.
Yeah. Pretty good.
Pretty good. We have this debate with every hockey guest that we have on here uh what is the difference between an upper and a lower body injury i think uh anything below the belly button is a lower body injury and anything above the belly button is upper body injury okay i agree with that because we've had people that say waste and i think that's bullshit i think it's the i think it's the belly button all right so we're on the same page yeah good call Did you ever get injured and you were like, can I just say what it is? This is bullshit.
Like people don't – because sometimes I'll see like an upper body injury and be like, oh, he can get back out there. But like, no, his shoulder's broken.
Why don't they just say that? Yeah, I don't know why because at the end of the day that the other teams know, like you know if a guy's shoulder's hurt the way he's lumbering around out there or if his his knees hurt especially now with video you you see a guy going into the boards the wrong way you're like oh he hurt his knee there or hurt his ankle or hurt his shoulder so I think throughout the league everyone kind of knows but I don't know why they don't say it in the media but uh you know it's kind of one of those cool things that hockey does where he keeps guys on the wrap I think originally it started so, you know, if guys were up for a contract, then, you know, it's kind of one of those cool things that hockey does where he keeps guys on the wrap. I think originally it started so, you know, if guys were up for a contract, then, you know, they couldn't use it against you.
Oh, I like that. I always assume it was so that the other team wouldn't target you.
If they knew it was a knee, then somebody might make a run at your knee. Yeah, but everyone on the ice knows if you're hurt.
I mean, by this time in the season, pretty much everybody's hurt anyways. You have some lingering bruises or you're not feeling 100%.
So every single guy is feeling something right now. But, yeah, it's interesting.
If they ever come out and go away with it and tell you what exactly the injury is, I'll be interested to see if they ever do that was there ever uh a season or a guy who just wouldn't get injured because i feel like everyone knows that one guy who just never you know the kid who never broke any of his bones playing sports or you know that one guy who just is for some reason never gets injured would you guys all look at him and be like fuck you dude like we're all dealing with something and you're fresh well i i was i had the iron man streak until phil kessel broke it um so you were the guy that everyone hated probably but i don't know because i mean i didn't really play the type of game where i was putting myself in vulnerable spots and um you know yeah there was a lot of guys i think every guy plays with you know as much pain as they can and it's usually the the doctors the trainers that have to tell you, you can't go. I've never seen a guy go in and be like, hey, I can't play tonight.
It's usually they have to drag you off the ice and, you know, notice you can't tie your skates because your fingers are broken or something like that. So it's usually the doctors or the GM and trainers that make that decision for guys because hockey hockey are a stubborn bunch of group.
Yeah, we learned that in Mighty Ducks. Yeah, we had Adam Banks hold the stick and he had to rotate.
And they're like, no, you can't go, dude. What was the dumbest injury you played through? The dumbest one? Looking back, when I was in New York, I had a grade three separation.
I got a first game of the playoffs and we ended up going to game seven of the Eastern conference finals. So every day I was shooting it or not every day, every game I was shooting it up.
Um, you know, having to have the trainers help me put my Jersey on, uh, things like that. And it, but it's also, it's during playoffs.
So you just want to during playoffs so you just want to be out there you want to be playing you want to be contributing so but that that one was probably the worst one and you know getting back healthy from that one took a little bit longer because it was uh you know something i was dealing with for for quite a bit yeah yeah i know that you're you're a sports fan you're deep balls deep in the discourse about other sports too. We've had some discussions about how analytics might be ruining

or might be improving football, basketball.

Ruining basketball.

Ruining basketball, I think improving but also ruining football

because big guys can't get NFL head coaching jobs anymore.

But in the NHL, what impact has the analytics revolution had on the sport? Is it good or is it bad? I hate it. I know nothing.
Too many computers. Guy who doesn't own a computer, that's a shocker.
I probably wasn't a great analytic guy either, but it also doesn't contribute to the good times in the locker room or on the road so you're not you're not getting that in analytics but yeah i was never a big fan um i think there's some good things about it i guess but i i honestly couldn't even tell you one what what an analytic really is i love what what you can't if you walked past an analytic on the street, you would not recognize it. Absolutely not.
They have a whole team, a whole group of people within the teams now that kind of take care of that, and they're literally just in their computers all day. It's like, just go get a real job.
The one thing that analytics has done in hockey is it's ruined the shoot-the-puck in the stands because they I feel like teams are a lot more selective with their shots.

They won't shoot from bad angles like they used to where it's like pucks on net.

It's like, no, you got to get the good shots.

I don't know.

I kind of disagree with that because I remember guys would, you know, you take a shot on net is considered a good thing for your analytics, like the zone time and stuff like that.

So some guys, you know, guys would shoot it from the corner just to shoot on the net and you'd get back to the bench.

guys would be like,

Thank you. is considered a good thing for your analytics, like the zone time and stuff like that.
So some guys would shoot it from the corner just to shoot it on the net, and you'd get back to the bench. Guys would be like, oh, what are you, Pat, and you're fucking analytic.
Oh, so maybe I'm wrong. Yeah, maybe I don't know an analytic in hockey either.
Yeah, but the shoot guy is the worst thing you can have at a hockey game, especially as a guy that I never – I wasn't a big shooter. I was more of a passer, but the shoot guy is the worst the worst thing you can have that at a hockey especially as a guy that i never i wasn't a big shooter i was more of a passer but uh the shoot guy is the worst oh i love i love the shoot the puck guy because that guy's sitting in the stands being like every shot in his head goes in so why not shoot the puck good things happen yeah i'm big i'm big on it in soccer too like why not just fucking shoot the ball? They should shoot more.
I agree. Yes.

Shoot the ball. Just fucking kick it.

Alright so I know it's tough

in hockey because hockey is the one playoffs

where you get crazy runs.

You get eight seeds winning the Stanley Cup

but if we're sitting right

here right now give me the

list of teams that you could see winning the Stanley

Cup this year. It could go as long or as short as

you want it to. Alright.
I'll just do two. I'll do two from the east two from the west oh I like that I'm gonna do uh Florida I think that especially what they did last year what they've done this year um you know even missing missing uh you know two of their best defensemen earlier in the year just playing the way that they.
I think Bobrovsky's been amazing. Barkov, Sam Reinhardt's got 30-something goals.
Just a hard team to play against. You watch their games and it's fucking old-school hockey.
Stop in front of the net, cross-checking guys in the face. It's great.
so I got them in the Rangers coming out of the east

that I like both. I think the Rangers have a ton of depth up front.
Goaltending has been – I think Shesterkin – well, Jonathan Quick has been amazing for them. I think Shesterkin could be a little better.
But it's one of those things when you get into playoffs and you have a guy like Shesterkin who's as good as he is. If he goes on a run, it could be game over for them.
And then out west, I really like Dallas. I liked them a lot last year too.
With Ottinger, I think he's one of the best goalies in the league. He's a young guy, had a good run last year, but I think he's just going to continue to get more confident in the playoffs.
I think they have a great, you know, older guys and younger guys kind of leading that team, guys with Jamie Benn and then Robinson with the younger guys, Rupe Hentz. It's, you know, they're a fun team to watch.
And then, you know, I think it's hard to bet against Vegas, but I think Colorado, the way that they're buzzing this year, you know, if they could get Landis Cog back for playoffs, you know, that would be a huge, a huge add for them. But it's also, too, a lot of these teams, you know, I feel more and more the trade deadline, you know, used to be the top four teams are going out making huge splashes i think teams nowadays are kind of sticking with what they have gotten them there um you know kind of trusting trusting within uh so it'd be interesting to see the trade deadline what teams are doing um but but a lot i think a lot of pieces are out there too also vancouver to vancouver what they've done this year but i don't i don't think canada is going to win a stanley cup anytime soon yeah okay yeah deadline being uh in march is pretty crazy it is wild yeah because it's just like that's that's very late it feels like in the season where you're you're looking around and it's like you're you got what a month before the playoffs and you can still make a move yeah you see more and more I think teams are making trades earlier uh rather than waiting to the trade then there used to be 50 trades every trade deadline now it's you know there's not many so I think teams are doing it earlier uh as opposed to late nowadays we saw a big trade um you know with Calgary and Vancouver in uh right before the the uh all-star game so I game.
So I think teams are going a little bit more towards getting guys in, having them get comfortable, and getting adjusted to the team system. So you didn't say Connor McDavid and the Oilers.
Whitney's told us that he's the greatest player to ever play in any sport. Wouldn't he have won a championship by now? I know, but he's told us that he's the greatest player to ever play in any sport.
Wouldn't he have won

a championship by now? I know.

But he's...

I

agree. MJ won his

first one at what, 26?

Maybe 27, yeah.

27. How old is McJesus?

I think he's younger than that, right?

Connor

McDavid. But he's better than MJ.
He's 27 years old. He's 20, so this is the year.
I think their goaltending might hurt them a little bit. Obviously, the run that they've been on since the beginning of the season when they were absolute dog shit, they've been great.
I think Mccdavid and dry settle can lead any team to victory but i think their goaltending is a you know it's just not quite there but you look at the last you know few stanley cup winners besides tampa with um vasilevsky a lot of these teams you know a goalie comes out of nowhere and them win. Vegas, I think, was on their third string goalie last year.
Even St. Louis when Bennington came in out of nowhere and won them a cup.
You know, even Chicago, and they had Crawford, who was an amazing goalie, but he wasn't, you know, a top three goalie in the league. He wasn't making the most money in the league.
So I think a lot of it, if your goalie gets hot, obviously you've got a good chance, but I don't see it as much in Edmonton. If I had to take a Canadian team, it would be Vancouver, mostly because of their goaltending.
With Demko, he's amazing and American. You haven't mentioned the Leafs, and it feels like every year I fall for the Leafs bullshit because they always have some bullshit where it's like, oh yeah, this is the year they can put together.
They've got a lot of talent. Austin Matthews probably, like, right now the hottest player of the NHL.
Give me a reason why the Leafs will not win the Stanley Cup. To be honest, I think it would strictly be because their fan base is too hard on them some of those teams like i worked in i worked in toronto last year doing uh sports net and they have one bad period of one bad game they're sell the farm you know you know blow up the team get rid of everyone i think brad tree living and shane do, what they've done since getting in there in management, have been really good, just kind of settling things down, getting guys accountable.
I think they look a lot better this year as a team. Obviously, what Austin Matthews is doing is insane right now.
He's got 50 goals, right, in 54 games.

It's unbelievable what this guy's doing.

With how good the goalies are, you know,

how much team scout players, everyone, you know,

is fully aware what he can do to you every night,

but no matter what, he can still find a way to score.

But I just don't know if they can get past that hump

and win it this year. I actually would love to see them win it i think it would be great for the game um they put on i was up there a couple weeks ago for uh all-star weekend they put on an amazing show but um yeah i think their fans just need to be a little bit nicer than the players i love that i love that they're eagles fans definitely not an analytics guy what's the reason that leafs can't win the Stanley Cup? Their fans are assholes.
They're too mean. It sounds like they're Eagles fans where it's like first sign of bad things is like fire everyone.
Yeah, like Max. Yeah, exactly, like Max.
By the way, Connor McDavid is incredible. I got to see him in person like three weeks ago and it is insane watching him play in person because you're like holy fuck he's just so much faster than everyone it's if you if you took someone to their first ever hockey game and it was conor mcdavid they just they would immediately be like that guy why is he so different than everyone else yeah i did i did a hockey camp this summer uh with my brother and we had some seven-year-olds eight-year-olds and you know we're doing a scrimmage or a keep away and i was kind of just going full speed trying to keep it away from these guys and it looks easier for mcdavid keeping it away from nhl players than it did for me with seven-year-olds on a different level it's it's unbelievable how fast he is how controlled how controlled he is with the puck while he's skating a hundred miles an hour it's just uh he's an impressive player and i i think wits wits uh wits saying that he's the best athlete ever is not far fetched um you know i think what he's doing to hockey is insane right now and um you know hopefully he can get sometime.
We asked with this, and we could ask you, if he's the best player in the world right now, why does he come off the ice? Good question. Very good question.
How many minutes does LeBron play per night? Patrick Mahomes doesn't miss a snap. A lot more.
I think just strictly because he's a good teammate. He wants to get his guys out there.
He knows that there's 21 other guys that got to make a living. So he's probably just out there being a good teammate, just letting guys get a touch.
But if anyone could play the whole game, it would probably be him. But I was actually just away talking with one of my buddies who buddies who knows nothing about hockey and he was like how come you guys only stay out there for 30 seconds and it's uh it's it's a good question but it's it's a tiring 30 seconds you you know you're getting leaned on by big heavy guys you're you're skating as fast as you can um you know if you stay out there for more than a minute no matter how good a shape you are you're dead yeah what what it when you're when you're in the defensive zone what uh what time is it like this is we're so fucked when because there is nothing better in like playoff hockey especially when a team can get uh you know they're in the zone for so long and they can't clear the puck and you're just like watching guys die at what moment like what time in that where you're like I'm so fucked it's going to be a goal there's nothing we can do yeah it's called the graveyard shift you're just trying not to die and biz says it all the time he's like you lose oxygen to your brain you don't know what you're doing the puck comes to you give it to the other team when you know if you had any any uh if you had some freshness in your legs or in your brain you would you would make a good play but when when those are happening when you're on the ice when you're uh when the team's snapping around you can't get you can't get out of the zone you can't get a whistle it's one of the worst feelings in the world and i probably my analytics are probably very high for being out there for those shifts.
Which is the longest you've ever been on the ice. I don't know.
In the NHL, probably, you know, two or three minutes, whether it's empty nets, empty. I mean, there's probably obviously whistles and stuff like that too, but you know, end of games when you're, when you're out there, if there's a power play, you're staying the full two minutes but yeah probably two and a half three minutes oh it sounds like a long ass time i'm looking right now last year jack hughes broke the record he had a shift of six minutes and two seconds that's insane that's insane that's unreal good for him yeah hey i got a question for you how come whenever the the puck goes out play, everybody on the ice just puts their hands up in the air and, like, yells at the ref like the ref didn't see it? For a penalty.
Oh, just to lay a game. No, they're trying to be like, hey, it went out.
Yeah, they're just trying to say. I don't know.
That's actually a good question. Everyone does it.
You're 100% right. It's probably just to make sure that – because a lot of times it could get tipped by a stick or hit a piece of the glass, and if it hits the glass or a stick, then it's not a penalty.
So I think when everyone's pointing, it's kind of just an indication to tell the ref that it went straight out and it should be a penalty. I always assumed it's no different than when there's a fumble in football and everyone points to their direction.
It's like no one actually knows. They're just trying to get the ref to be like, oh, yeah, he pointed first.
Yeah, when they're in the scrum. Yeah, right.
If you point first over the glass, the refs would be like, oh, maybe it did go out. Yeah.
But when a guy shoots it over the net, if you see their face, they know exactly what they did. That's one of the worst feelings in the world is shooting one over the glass and getting a penalty.

Yeah. You also didn't mention

the Boston Bruins. Curious why

they're not on the list.

I actually,

in the beginning of the year, I didn't even see them

being as good as they are. I thought they were going to be

a wild card team.

Very impressed

with what they've done this year. I thought

losing Bergeron was really going to hurt them but um you know what pasta does every year is amazing Marshawn stepping in as a captain this year uh I also thought they did a good job of bringing in um some older veteran guys which not a lot of teams are doing you know they brought in you know JBR uh Kevin Shattenk, guys that have been around, guys that know what it takes. So I think they did a good job with bringing in older guys to help out their younger guys.
Because, you know, you look in the beginning of the year, I think the kid's name's Portois or something like that. He started off hot, had a good first 10 games.
But, you know, when you're young, anyone can have a good 10 games. You need those veteran guys around to help you out.
you know when you're young anyone can have good 10 games that you need those

veteran guys around to to help you out um you know during the dog days of the year like they're like they are now and um i think the bruins did a good job of that i just i think the east is going to be tough to get to get out of um you saw a little bit last year with the way that they do their two goalie system doesn't quite work in playoffs you got to have that one guy so I mean we'll see I don't think anyone will want to play them in the playoffs but I don't see them going on a deep run and probably good that I live in Florida now not Boston because I'd be getting my head punched in all right one guy wanted to bring up because we just saw his jersey get retired in Pittsburgh, Jarmi Yager. It was awesome.
They all wear mullets. They came out.
He seems like an absolute legend of a guy. You got to play with him.
Is our view of Yager correct that he is just a guy everyone loves, not only because he was so talented, but just a good dude in the locker room he he was amazing he was uh the way i describe it he was like a little kid he was just a little kid but when i played with him i think he was 67 years old so but he um like he would sit on i'll never forget to be like hey yenzi yenzi want to go get a muffin want to go get a muffin he'd sit on the back of the bus and he'd eat his muffins like a little kid unbelievable but good Yager story I think it was uh Foxwoods or Mohegan Sun when he was in either Pittsburgh or New York they were opening up their casino and they waited for a night that Jager was playing in boston and could make the trip up there and kind of you know be part of the first the open night i'm like oh that's pretty cool they want you there he's like they didn't want me there they wanted all my money he probably gave it to him oh yeah yeah the quote that he had where he was like uh yeah i want to thank my girlfriend too she's too young to remember when remember when I played in Pittsburgh. I think she would have liked it here.
Yeah. I rocked.
There was a clip I saw that someone was like, yeah, Yager used to have a party every year and it was 100 people and there was no more than 10 dudes. Yeah.
The guy was beautiful. Yeah.
The girlfriend that he had when I played with him, same thing. She was probably 22, and yeah and this guy like he would make her come to the rink with him he'd go to the rink at midnight and just go skate around and she'd have to sit in the stands and video him and I'm like what is going on here and I'm like yags what does she do he's like oh you want to see if she's strong she's strong too and he's 250 pounds we're at our Halloween party and he's, you want to see how strong she is? I'm like, yeah, sure.
He just jumps on his back and she started doing squats with him on his back. I'm like, what is going on in there? That's incredible.
Love, love the game more than anyone. Probably the biggest rink rat I've ever seen was always at the rink, tinkering with stuff.
He'd put you know the pre-wrap they put on like your wrist if you're taping your wrist he would put that on a stick and then put tape over it to make his stick softer he he was just he was ahead of his game with the stuff that he had and uh you know he'd put potatoes on his knees if his knees were hurting in his shin pads he'd put like he had this uh this metal healing thing he'd put on his chest and like tape it to his shoulder pads and i'm like what does that do y'all he's like brings me strength okay uh biggest word like he skated every day at an old age he'd have 10 pound weights on his skates which is insane to skate around in And, you he'd have those on his skates he'd be like oh i feel like i'm 55 years old i'm like yags you got 10 pound skates like you have to just get regular so you can feel at least 45 you know yeah i mean he plays 27 years or 28 years whatever it was so something worked yeah the potatoes that's crazy yeah that's the most eastern european thing i've ever heard like potatoes your knees kind of like pouring vodka on your knees it makes it it makes it nice and warm and toasty oh i always heard my dad my dad when we were younger like yarma yarga does a thousand uh you know squats a day 500 push-ups and i always thought it was just a dad lie you know know? And I asked him, and he said, yeah. He was like, I did that as a kid.
Did 1,000 squats every day before school, 1,000 after, wrist curls, everything. He was a machine just built to play hockey.
Yeah. Also, Caps legend.
I have one question about the Capitals, then we'll move on. But it seems to me like they've constructed their entire roster to spend the next two years just getting Ovi the goals record.
Is that fair to say? Like, are they even trying to compete for anything? Yeah, they are. I mean, I think that they're a proud organization.
I think that, you know, they're going to, you know, obviously try to win the Stanley Cup every year like every team. But I think what they're doing for OV, I think a lot of teams, especially nowadays, you know, the older you get, you know, the kind of teams are kind of pushing you out.
But I think, you know, what he's done for that city, for that organization, he deserves everything that he's getting. And, you know, whether it's trying to help him get the goal record or play as long as he can to get it, I think they're doing the right thing by him, and he deserves it.
Yeah, I'm fine with it. I think if you're not going to be at the top of that level and actually have a chance to win the Stanley Cup, take care of your guy that gave you, what, 15, 20 years of great hockey and try to help him accomplish something that's crazy.
That's the one thing that I am paying attention to with the Capitals this year. It's like, okay, I want to know when Ovi scores.
I want to know how he's doing. I want to make sure he's healthy and he's not like hurting the team when he's out there, at least to my eyes, he can still play at a high level.
A hundred percent. And he, he's a guy, I think like Yager.
I don't think there's an age limit for him to play. I think that what he does, he's so big, he's so strong, obviously shoots the puck like a savage.
So he'll be able to get his goals. And I think it's just strictly up to him whether he wants to continue to keep playing and chase the record.
I know talking to Wayne, Wayne would like to see him get it. He knows that records like that are meant to be broke and good for the game and stuff like that so um yeah it is a good thing for the league to have a guy to be even within you know talking about you know breaking a Wayne Gretzky record and um you know everyone always said forever that it would never be touched and now you got Ovechkin and the way Austinin matthews is scoring uh you know those records could be broken yeah keith the andle was brought to you by proper number 12 irish whiskey that's right proper 12 is rich and smooth it's irish whiskey they've also got the proper number 12 irish apple whiskey which is the best sipping whiskey that you can have just pass a bottle around pour it on ice pour it in a glass you can even mix it it's great great stuff i love drinking it they sent us a bunch when they came on as a sponsor put it on my bar cart that stuff went fast it's crisp and fresh especially the irish apple it was founded by conor mcgregor you can shoot your shot of proper number 12 irish whiskey and pour the roar order your bottle of proper number 12 irish whiskey with Drizzly.
Check it out. And now here's Keith Yandel.
So one Blackhawks question. They're the worst team in the league.
So they might get the first pick again. Obviously, Conor Bedard being out for like a month and a half probably helped them.
They wouldn't have been good even if he was healthy the whole time, but they might not have been the worst. Is the Celebrini kid just as, like, can't miss as Bedard?

From everything I've heard, I've watched him play maybe three times this year.

He's got an absolute laser of a shot.

You know, Witt works over at BU with them.

I think he helps out over there.

What, working with their golf swing or something?

Yeah, getting them out on the boat. It's important to take time off boys More vacations than anyone He was just down in Florida two weeks ago And then he texted me the other day He's like I'm going to be down there on Thursday You want to golf I'm like do you ever stay home Yeah I think it's a situate thing, him and Hank.
Yeah, that's true. A couple vacation legends.
Yeah, they just vacation. But Celebrini might be another can't-miss guy.
Yeah, I'm pretty sure he's going to be that guy that is a can't-miss. Talking to one of my best friends as a scout, he's saying he's a camp mess.

I think there's a few guys in the draft that are really good. But I think if they were able to get him and Bedard and obviously being a great city, Chicago, I think that they will have some really good teams for a long time because, you know, you hate to say, but a team like Winnipeg, if they're getting first overall guys,

then you're not really getting the um free agent signings as much as a city like chicago would get because it's such a good city you know guys love playing there great fans great atmosphere best jerseys in the league so it's uh i think i think if they were able to get him then it'll'll be a fun 15, 20 years for you guys. Yeah, they'll rig the draft again.
They should. Remember when the Hawks were winning their Stanley Cups, it was like a joke that NBC, it was like every single week, it was a Blackhawks game.
It was every time there could be a national televised game, it was a Blackhawks game. Yeah, and I remember playing during those playing during those and you're like geez why do the blackhawks get every game but now being out and being in the media it's you got to put on games that are going to grow the game and in the players that are going to grow the game um you know i think the league's doing an amazing job of of that uh you know growing the game getting guys getting guys out there more than they had in the past.
But I think when Chicago's a good team, it's good for everyone. Yeah, it's the original six.
Whenever there's an original six, it feels like there's just more momentum. Yeah, or just big fights if there's constant big fights.
I think last time we had Biz on, he told us to watch Wi-Fi, that dude up in Montreal. That dude can throw some punches.

I love watching clips of his fights.

Who's another goon or tough guy that we should keep our eye on?

I think Brady Kachuk, who's –

I think he's leading the league in fights this year.

And I golfed with him over All-Star break.

He was down here in Florida.

And I'm like, he's a top 10, 15 player in the league.

I'm like, Brady, you got to stop fighting, man. I know, I know he's a big, strong kid.
He can throw his hands. I'm like, you got to stop fighting, man.
Like, their team's in last place. He's like, I can't shut it off.
And probably the reason why he is who he is. And, you know, I'm here talking to you guys.
Yeah. When you get to playoff season as a defenseman, how much does it suck knowing that you now have to get in front of every puck is there like a something in your head that flips and you're like all right now everything every every single one that i stayed on my feet for i'm gonna have to get on the ground and take one to the knee take one of the shin take one of the ankle like do you just dread that yeah that that and going back for pucks because especially as a as an offensive defenseman teams would you know they dump it in your corner and they're just trying to get trying to get licks on you and it's it's the worst it's especially that first game you're like okay you got to prepare for battle um you know you're basically playing hockey without a puck the first couple games teams are so fired up to get the the playoffs started I think the first round of playoffs is probably the best round you know teams are flying around trying to kill each other like you said blocking shots everywhere but I always said like I never asked the goalie to go play the power play for me you know he should never ask me to block the puck oh.
That's a fair point. He's asking you to do his job for him.
Yeah, I like that. But it's not really the goalies.
It's more the coaches. Yeah, there definitely – was there times when you wouldn't get down for a puck and you'd get reamed out afterwards being like, what the fuck are you doing? Oh, yeah, all the time.
Copy analytics for that. See, if I were a coach before the playoffs, I would just just i would lay down on the ice and be like all right boys if i can do it you can do it and just let the whole team fire on me for like for like 10 minutes and be like now go and do it the lead from the front you'd be dead yeah but the guys would be fired up they'd be fired up yeah that would that would be a good tactic.
Maybe if you're down three games to one or something like that, doing that by a coach would be elected. But a lot of the coaches are guys that were shot blockers, guys that were out there giving it their all, and all the players know that too.
So when they're asking you to do it and you knew that they did it, it's tough to not kind of sack up and do it. Yeah, that's fair.
And they probably did it in an era where they had less pads on. Yeah, I don't know.
The pads have always been like every time you get hit with a puck, you feel it. Unless you get hit in the foot when you have the shot blockers on, it kind of just grazes off your foot, then you don't really feel it it too much but anytime you get hit with a puck in the foot or it it always finds the area with no equipment and um or i shouldn't say always i'd say 70 of the time you're you're getting full impact of the puck just on your bare skin which is the absolute worst yeah that sounds awful uh i was reading something the other day about how coaches

they don't use their uh their challenge where they can like say hey that guy's got a a fucked up stick he's got too much curve on his stick coaches don't do that ever even though it's basically a free penalty every single night if they wanted to do it and are they not doing that because everybody everybody cheats and they know that they have guys on their team that do it too Is that even a rule anymore?

The illegal curve?

I think so, yeah.

Really? everybody everybody cheats and they know that they have guys on their team that do it too is is that even a rule anymore the uh illegal curve i think so yeah really um yeah i would say i mean the way guys curves are nowadays i'd say over 50 of the league if there is a legal curve um everyone's i would imagine if it if it's the same of what it used to be there used to be like the silver thing that you put up against it that measured it. But I can't imagine that it's still a rule or why people aren't using it.
But it's probably the same thing, like you said, because you have access to other teams' room. Your trainers are going in there.
You could go in and measure a guy's stick before a game

and kind of know exactly what you're going into.

But, yeah, that's – I wonder when the last time that was called.

I know the famous one with Marty McSorley.

Yeah.

I think he was in L.A. at the time.

But, yeah, I wonder what the last one was. Yeah, because the thing I was reading was saying that coaches don't do it because it's like a an unwritten rule gentleman game yeah where maybe you're pointing the finger at them you got some going on at your own end but yeah nobody does anymore and it seems like it's a free penalty if you want it yeah maybe now if people hear this then people will do it and play us that's but that is one of the good things about the nhl I saw it the other night.
Did you guys see the guy in Ottawa scored the empty net goal? Yes. Just rushed him.
That's my favorite part about the NHL, how it just polices itself. Imagine in football if you do something stupid and a 400-pound lineman, you know he's going to come and just rip your head off.
You're probably not going to do it yeah so the way the way that the game polices itself is amazing um yeah and probably with the coaches not doing that it's probably just out of uh out of respect yeah for people who missed it it was a empty net goal was like 4-2 and then uh there was like five seconds left and was it an Ottawa player who just took a slap shot from like five feet away on an empty net goal and scored with like no time left and he just got absolutely bum rushed immediately it was awesome and the worst part because you have your goalie pulled so you got one more player than the other team out there so no matter what this guy's getting hands put on him by someone even if your whole team comes in which Ottawa did but uh you know there's two guys on that guy who who shot it into the net and caused that havoc yeah that was great all right so yeah it's been awesome I have one last question it's a rowback question rhoback.com use promo code take 20 off your first purchase q-zips polos hoodies joggers shorts rowback.com the best golf stuff out there uh go get it right now. Roback.com, promo code TAKE.
All right, so Yans, you are in the Dozen Trivia League. You are on one of the worst teams ever.
Very entertaining, but very bad at trivia. So I wanted to test your trivia and give you a question and see how you're doing, how the mind's coming along.
Okay? You ready? one yeah no it's an easy one alright Keith Yandel you scored how many goals and had how many assists in your NHL career we should do someone else should do a niche we should have K KB learn all of Yan's stats and have that be a niche because he could dominate. Come on.
I think goals, I'm pretty sure I got 100 or – I want to say 100 or just over 100. We need a number.
I'm going to go 102.

103 was the correct answer.

That's pretty good, though.

That's pretty damn good.

You were pretty close.

And then assist.

You get like a plaque for the assist.

I don't know.

Maybe 450.

Oh, no.

You sold yourself short on both.

516 on assist.

All right. Yeah.
What about penalty minutes? Oh, no. You sold yourself short on both.
516 on assists. Alright.

What about penalty minutes?

Oh, God.

Penalty minutes.

Let's see if we can find this stat.

I'm not good at math. Let me...

I'm gonna go...

I don't know if I can

find it. 400.

Yeah, exactly correct.

Come on.

No, no, 616.

All right.

So, you know, Keith Yandel's stats might not be the niche category for the dozen for you.

No, I have no idea.

That's actually way cooler, though, to be like, I think it was like a little over 100.

Yeah, I would absolutely know exactly how many goals I scored in the nhl yeah for sure 103 on the dot no i wish i wish it was a lot more yeah i wasn't listening to the guys in the stands yelling shoot yeah you should have you should have um all right well yans thanks as always man this has been awesome uh we got to get you we got to get you in the chicago office maybe for the start of playoffs. I know we're going to do a big stream.

It'll be good to get you here. You think you can

handle one of these

41 free throw streams?

That was impressive that you guys got that done.

I don't know how you did that.

The one we're talking about might

be like, Biz and Wint want

to do like a

post stream.

You got to hit like 30 posts in a row or

something 30 in a row but you get the same thing the mulligan yeah but then you gotta add me and

dave doing it too which is gonna be impossible yeah you guys wouldn't get more than one in a row

yeah so we might need you this wouldn't get more than one in a row would wit yeah wit would probably

go what was the max you could do 10 for you guys yeah 10 he could do 10 in a row easy yeah once you get once you get on a uh does it matter like if you shoot and then missed you keep going or no no you have to then get off well you could keep going yeah if you want if you but it only counts the makes yeah yeah i think i think once you got on a roll you could get pretty hot hitting those. You could easily do 10 in a row.
Okay. I don't think Biz could.
Biz would maybe get two or three. It would be just fun seeing the two of them just like once you get to like hour 12.
You think Whitney would be able to do like a two-day stream nonstop? Yeah, the quit factor. We might need you because you're a dog.
Yeah, you'd be in with the boys for as long as it took. What about bringing in goalies, like bringing in 50 goalies and just rotating them every 30 shots and you've got to score a certain amount because the post is – Yeah, I like that.
Going against real goalies, yeah, that would be good. And, yeah, you just keep rotating.
How many high school or not even high school, college kids that listen to your guys' show, you would have a line out the door of goalies ready to go. That would be fun.
What about me and Big Cat? So neither one of us play hockey. But if you gave us like a 20-foot wrister against an NHL goalie, how many goals do you think we could score if we took like 100 shots?

Zero.

No, I'd score one.

Yeah, I'd score one. I'd score one.

Top cheddar.

20-foot?

Knuckle puck, bitch.

Yeah.

15-foot.

No.

Maybe if you had like a breakaway, one could flip over a puck,

but you wouldn't – you know.

I wouldn't – if I had 100 shots on a goalie just straight away,

no screen from 20 feet away, I don't think I'd score more than three. That sounds like we got a new challenge.
Yeah. Okay.
All right. I think I could do it.
Challenge, yeah. I'm different, though.
I'm ready. All right.
Well, Yans, thanks so much, man. Appreciate you coming on.
I love that you don't have a computer. Never change.
Never change that. Okay, I will never ever get a computer thank you alright talk to you later man see you man alright thanks Keith Yandel was brought to you by Mountain Dew Baja Blast baby that's what I'm opening right now all the boys drink Baja Blast Hank.
Hank spilled a little bit. That's okay.
That was a bad throw by you. That's Mountain Dew.
But a great drink. What do you mean a bad throw? Oh, my God.
It's the best. You caught it.
You forgot that it was fizzy. You forgot that things that were shaken up gets fizzy.
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I know firsthand that having a blast can be as simple as cracking open. A Mountain Dew Baha Blast, anytime, anywhere.
are if you're watching the game if you're at a game if you're at home on the couch nothing like it i like a nice i you know what i really enjoy is like an italian sandwich with an ice cold mountain dew blast for lunch that to me is mountain dew baja blast is the best lunch drink in america maybe of all time yes mountain dew Baja Blast, the Taco Bell drink in America, maybe of all time. Yes.

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Here's a crazy idea I just thought of.

What about a Baja float?

Oh.

We put like a scoop of ice cream in there.

Yeah.

I would eat that.

I like it.

It's the best soda.

Mountain Dew Baja Blast in stores now.

Check it out. Hey, Max, Mountain Dew Baja Blast, you want one? I'll eat that.
I like it. It's the best soda.
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Hey, Max.

Mountain Dew Baja Blast.

You want one?

I'll take two.

Well, you didn't get it, dude.

I said you want one.

Well, I was going to take two.

But I had two in my hand.

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Because that's one to you.

This actually is.

This is maybe the one soda that, like, if you drink two, you are.

That just means you're the smartest man alive.

Yeah.

That's a fact.

All right. We'll finish up the show.
Life After Football. So, Jake, you have a list? Yeah.
So, last year, around this time, we did a segment, Hobbies the Boys Will Pick Up Now that Football is Over. Love it.
And I will say, Hank was not on this list because I think he stayed in Arizona for vacation. Yeah, you're on vacation.
I remember that show. We had a talk with D'le about uh because we were set on the show biz canceled because he was sick and then i hit up whitney and he was on a boat or golf and he was like yeah whitney all he does is vacation is that just is situate thing it's a beach town it's it's the irish riviera it's beautiful beautiful ocean vibes, Hank, do you have anything that you would have put on this list? What was the prompt? Hobbies the boys will pick up now that football is over, but 365 days ago.
Yeah, what would you have done last year? I mean, golf. Okay.
Yep. All right.
All right. Well, I'm pleased to say that a lot of these were accomplished.
They were accomplished? Yes. Okay, let's see.
PFT, your first bullet. Break 120 in golf.
Boom, easy. You did three quarters of that.
Done. This week.
Well, I got 90. It's not breaking 90.
True, but pretty much three quarters. Everyone's goal when they start playing golf is to break 91, and I did that.
PFT, get a word of the day calendar. Unfortunately, I did not do that.
Okay. And lastly, PFT, run a marathon and not tell anyone.
Well, yeah. No, you did that.
If I did run a marathon, I'm going to continue not to tell anyone. That's going on this year's list.
All right. Okay.
Big Cat. Yeah.
Be a dad more. Yeah.
You did that. Yeah.
Hell yeah. You got 365 more days of dadding in.
Yeah. I mean, I added another son.
So how could I not be a dad more? Right. Microdose mushrooms.
Yep. Have done that multiple times.
Olympic weightlifting. Yeah.
Max and I are going to do that. We got to get back on our plan.
I was just talking to Max today, actually. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Me and Max are going to work out tomorrow. Yeah back.
Oh, you already ditched me. He said, are you going to work out tomorrow? I said, yes.
Okay, you ditched me. That's fine.
We have three bullets for Billy football. Oh, this should be good.
If we hit it hard starting now, we can actually be in a good spot for summer. We can, yeah.
Good point, Hack. I had that thought.
I'm going to hit it hard. The last couple weeks were tough.
I'm in a bad spot now. I'm going to hit it so hard.
Billy. I might have sold a video where I have to learn how to dunk, too.
So that's actually something I have to do. That's cool.
But not in reality. In theory.
Wait, you're going to be able to dunk? They're like, oh, what are some ideas? I could learn how to dunk. No, you can't.
It's not like learning how to ride a bike. Yeah, it's practicing vertical leap.
Training. Don't know if you physically.
Have you ever got rim? Yes. On the court.
When I was like 17. But the ball makes it so much harder.
How tall are you? You are more likely to get six pack, which is never going to happen, than dunk. Why not both? Okay.
Why not both? I've been waiting, what, three years on the six-pack? Yeah.

I guess we found out Hank's hobby for football offseason.

Hank had a dunk.

Yeah, I've got the dunk shoes, the isometric ones.

I would love for you to dunk.

Men's ball.

Okay.

I have to try.

I'll bet you $10,000 you can't do it by the end of the year.

Yeah, I'll match.

What do I?

Men's ball, $10,000.

You have to give us $10,000 back, not $20,000. So $ and 5.
We'll give you 20. You give us 10.
7 and a half. That's crazy.
8. 4 and 4.
8. All right.
Deal. All right.
Deal. It was just whatever money we wanted.
Men's basketball. 10-foot rim.
Yeah. In this office.
Yeah. This is the stupidest thing you've ever...
It's impossible. How tall are you? Six.
I mean, that's how old you were. I think...
Okay, yeah, no. I literally said it was probably a future me thing, but...
Okay, wait, wait. Similar category.
Keep everything running. Max, you talk about your vacation real quick.
PFT and I and Hank are going to go watch how close he gets to the rim. We'll come right back.
It'll take like 10 seconds. Talk about your vacation, the three of you.
The booth talk. All right.
Max, how was your vacation? My vacation was great. Hank, I've actually been wanting to say this take.
Hank goes to San Diego a lot. He has family out there.
And he gets a lot of shit about wanting to move to San Diego. The place is unbelievable.
Yeah. It's like a playground.
It's the most beautiful place on earth. I hung out with a lot of people that were there and I couldn't understand how like people can like have a normal day there.
Oh, and they're back. It's just sunny every day.
Okay. We're back.
What was the result? We're going to dunk. So I was, he actually PFT.
We screwed up because what we should, we should have done it. The only, the only regret I have with this bet Is we should have made All parties put the money in an interest account Because $8,000 is not going to be the same amount of money Next year in 7 months Thanks Biden I think this is the same category as Hank's pole vaulting take Yeah I mean it's just not going to happen So Hank I said the exact same thing When I was 30 I was like I'm going to figure out how to dunk I said literally the exact same thing when I was 30.
I was like, I'm going to figure out how to dunk. I said literally the exact same thing.
You're welcome to. Go ahead, Hank.
And it's very hard at this stage. I have a seven-inch advantage.
Seven inches. You had to know that was coming.
You can't say Hank is more likely to dunk than you. At my peak, when I was like 18 years old, I was able to grab the rim with my fingertips.
That wasn't a bad baseline. I'm on zero training.
Yeah, I know, but you're not going to dunk. What if I just go hard? Okay.
Well, if you go hard, you get $20,000. So you're going to have to, one, lose weight, and then two, get stronger.
Yeah. No, I know.
Listen. It will come out of the part of my cheese.
Believe. All I need is some people to believe.
I know there's going to be a lot of haters, a lot of doubters, and that's fine. You have no reason to believe, but for the ones that do, buy in now, and maybe I'll split the money with you.
Oh, you're going to sell stock. What does that mean? Just people have to show you support, and then you're like, I'll give you money? Yeah support you know what hank i think you can do it i think you can do it all right i i would like to match uh anyone who shows consistent hate towards hank and really bashes him you will also maybe get involved in the money that we're gonna here's what we'll do we'll just every day just be like there's no chance you fucking idiot we'll sell a heavily discounted shirt when hank can't do it that just says hank couldn't do it yeah hank couldn't do it december 31st wait no i thought we said beginning of football season end of the year no no no no no i'll give him the next 10 football seasons yeah why yeah why don't we give you the end of your 30s uh? What about steroids? Yeah.
You can use steroids to go for it. I'm going to do it.
That's the thing. You can use steroids, but you have to share.
I'm due. I'm due to follow up on one of these things and make it happen.
Okay. Put it that way.
I don't think this is the one. That's some Billy football logic right there.
You do. And if I can do this, six-pack will be come with it,

so that should be a double. I should get an

incentive. Okay, what if...

I'll give you an extra incentive. If I dunk shirtless

with my six-pack bulging. If you can't dunk,

I'll give you

three chances

to go perfect from

a three-point contest. And if you

get that, then you get the money. Okay.

That was smart by me, because

now he's going to, like, halfway through not training,

he's going to be like, maybe I'll just train my three-point contest. And if you get that, then you get the money.
That was smart by me because now he's going to like halfway through not training. He's going to be like, maybe I'll just train my three-pointers and he'll stop training to dunk.
That works. So three times through, you'd have to make 25 three-pointers in a row.
Yeah, that'll never happen. Alright, we'll say 20.
That is so much more likely to happen than you dunking. That just made me mad that you were like, that'll never happen.
All right, we'll say 20. That is so much more likely to happen than you dunking.
Why are you? That just made me mad that you were like, that will never happen, but dunking will. Because you don't understand his mindset right now.
Dude, he's got that. In Frank's mind, he's like, all I have to do is just hit the gym, and then I'll be able to do it.
When do you think you're going to train? When does training start? Tomorrow. Yeah? Yeah.
Okay. Not tomorrow.
All right. What else do we have? Billy's Hobbies.
Oh, yeah. I've never trained my legs.
I have chicken legs, and I basically just touch rim. So you're just an untapped resource.
Yes. You did not basically just touch rim.
Pretty much. No.
Like six inches away.

Yeah.

And you would then have to go another.

Like it has to be a clean dunk.

No like getting the ball to the rim and like having it just fall in.

You have to actually dunk.

Your hands have to be all the way over and dunk.

Okay.

I'm reviewing the tape right now, Hank.

You are about, I'd say your fingertips are a good five and a half inches.

I know exactly what that looks like. So that's like another foot of vertical leap you need.
You need, yeah, about another foot to get up there. Work to be done.
Okay. Can't wait to get to work.
Billy's hobbies that he'll pick up now that football season is over from last year. Not get too deep into conspiracies.
Oh, he failed that one. Big time.
Listen to macro dosing. Don't get suspended.
Okay, failed. Yeah, failed that.
And the Jets project. Is that the quarterbacks thing? Didn't he already do that? I think he did.
Yeah, he did. Was there a different Jets project? Oh, did he just say that after he had finished it? Maybe.
That would be very Billy. Finish the Jets project? Me.
Competitive pickleball did Did that. Check.
Max. Cook more.
Max? I've been ripping cooking ever since I moved to Chicago and never get takeout. Only cook.
You're basically the bear. Yep, basically.
You're the bear if it was just about, yeah, like put the fat hairy version of bear. Yeah, I basically just make chicken and rice.
But it's like at-home Mexican bowls.

I do it like every week, though.

Once a week we're cooking?

Yeah, we're cooking.

I love that.

And then finally, memes, get physical.

Okay.

Memes, did you get physical?

It was get a physical.

Oh, yeah, get a physical.

As a physical man.

Still need one.

Okay.

All right, let's do listeners submitted ones memes i got hank hanks focus on dunking 23 pointers in a row hank and you're out you guys really don't yeah whatever i probably can't shooting threes like by thursday you're gonna see him just doing the racks well no i'm just gonna have to do whatever whatever if you believe well hank you got to make a decision because if you know i'm dunking if you work your legs you're 3 to see him just doing the racks. Well, no, I'm just going to have to do whatever.
Whatever. If you believe.
Well, Hank, you got to make a decision because if you. No, I'm dunking.
If you work your legs, your three-point shot might get jacked up. I will dunk on you.
Basketball. In a game.
Oh. Oh, in a game? Now this is way different.
In a game? Pick 31 winners. PMT gets a team to select NFL teams in Madden.
Select a day and have a fantasy draft and host an entire season that each person runs their team? Can either play each week or sim? No. I don't even know what I'm reading.
It's just, we're trying to do another football season. Would be good content during that draft.
Oh, this is a suggestion for us. Yeah, yeah, this is a suggestion for us.
All right. I did that in high school.
It was fun. My friends and I live in North Carolina.
Sounds like a blast. And have been following the immaculate stingray pregnancy.
Yes. That's the Cindy Sweeney movie.
Yes. This got me thinking, what if Jesus does come back every 2,000 years but in form of different animals? We have been stuck on this and have been rewriting scriptures from the perspective of different animals.
Didn't think it would be this bad one week with no football. Whoa.
What animal do you think would have the biggest impact if they had a jesus dog easy as always fuck hanko dukes ah that i feel like cats would they would like all follow their jesus like hardcore well cats can like gang up cat cat people no but cats themselves they they could gang up. No, they would just end up fighting.

They're solitary animals. Yeah, but dogs, you just

throw a tennis ball and the whole playing goes,

yeah, he becomes like the alpha wolf.

The king of kings.

No, he's saying wolves.

Or bird.

A bird.

Everybody flies behind it.

What's up, boys? Welcome back.

I'm in my second year out of college in a new city

where I don't have many guy friends.

So I filled my weekend this fall with as much football as I could. Now that it's over, I am suffering extreme withdrawal.
So much that I bought the new Madden game just to have football on my TV. Even if I was the one creating the football, I'm worried that my weekends this spring-summer will be a vortex of nothingness.
I'm planning on getting a golf membership to my local course this summer. Smart.
Nine handicap, no big deal. But I'm open to potential other hobbies to keep myself from playing 36 holes five days a week.
Any ideas? Love you guys. Start drinking more.
Just become a raging alcoholic. Walk.
Yeah. Do you have a girlfriend? Just walk.
If not, you can find a girlfriend.

Sydney Sweeney single?

I don't think she is.

Oh, fuck.

That was the whole big controversy.

Are you sure?

Yeah, with the other guy when they were promoting their rom-com.

Oh, man.

I'm going to need a minute.

She's been lying to me.

That sucks.

I know you.

Wait, she's engaged.

What?

Good for her. Every time she's working on a movie, can't come over.
I know what this guy's going through because this morning I just, I thought I just like sat down and I was like, what if the Rams played the Seahawks this weekend and I made a line for it and I had Rams minus two and a half. Where? In Seattle.
Oh, I would hammer the, oh no, the Rams minus two and a half. Yeah.
It's a good line. Yeah, it's a good line.
It's a good line. I also had Vegas at Carolina.
Ugh. And that was Vegas minus three.
Starting quarterback, Aidan O'Connell? Aidan O'Connell, Bryce Young, but remember they got Canales. Yeah.
You wrote a cuck book. I'll end with this one.
Probably the best suggestion we've ever had.

Learn how to dunk.

Idea for what to do while football is gone.

Fully commit to an off-season training program.

Conditioning, weights, study film, drilling plays, whole nine yards.

I like that.

Pretend that you're going to be a linebacker.

Or like a shooting guard.

Who can dunk?

But he's talking about football. Yeah.
Fully commit to an off-season training program. Including what? Conditioning, weights, studying, film, drilling plays, the whole nine yards.
Oh, I guess it could be basketball. Could be golf, too.
Could be golf. Yeah.
Okay. I like that one.
Alternate idea. Fully committing to getting in the worst shape of your life and see how unhealthy you can get all the way through preseason and then commit to getting in cheap next year.
That'll work. I like the sound of that.
We've always talked about meeting in the middle. Yeah.
What are you at now? I'm at like two. Two something? Yeah.
Two and change? Meeting in the middle? It's two dot dot dot. Do you think meeting in the middle would be approximately 210 pounds? How much do you weigh? I'm like, I don't know.
I haven't been on a scale in a while. I think 180.
It might have to be a little higher than that. I could get up to like 215, 220.
I'm about to get into shape. Chef Donnie's about to.
I just gave him my credit card. I was like, make me food.
If anyone wants to get on the meal plan. Sure.
I'm in. I'm going to be in.
Well, you guys got to give them your credit cards too. I'll just take it.

I'll say it's a-

Okay.

We'll take it out of your time.

I told them to just get a big bowl and have hard-boiled eggs in there at all times.

That sounds like a recipe for disaster.

So anyone who wants hard-boiled eggs, hit me up.

I'm going to be flush with hard-boiled eggs.

If they get a bar for everything else, why not just an egg bar?

You get the egg and then you get chives, salt, pepper, bacon bits.

Yeah.

Are you talking about just an omelet bar?

Yeah, egg bar.

Hard-boiled.

I'm talking about egg-

You're talking about an omelet station.

No, this is completely different.

It's hard-boiled eggs, but you get all the shit that goes in an omelet, and you just

put it on the egg, and it's way healthier.

This is going to be a big Google.

What?

Wait, what? What was that? What is that sentence? This is going to be a big Google. Is this a question from a listener that you're looking up or is it? What are you doing? Egg related.
We're on a podcast, Hank. How long to learn how to dunk? I suspect there are a few variables that go into that.
A couple, I would say.

One, have you ever dunked before?

Two, how old are you?

Three, do you have chicken legs?

Four, are you delusional?

Like, I think...

Delusional is good.

I agree.

Yeah, sure.

But yeah, there's...

Like, LeBron James' daughter's gonna dunk before you.

Just think about that.

Easily, yes. A couple variables.
There wasn't wasn't like an easy answer. No, of course not.
Okay. I read it said I would like three months so I can impress some people in school after summer.
This guy sounds like my type of guy. In school? Top comment.
No way to tell and it's going to be different for everyone. If you can just grab a rim, then you're six to eight inches away from dunking off the dribble.
Oh, yeah. So that much in three months is not going to happen.
I would say a year if you get hella lucky. If not, then like a year and a half.
You're not grabbing rim. You're about six inches away from grabbing rim.
So add five to eight inches on top of that. So that's another 10 years.
Over a foot. So yeah.
Maybe when you're 50? I'd say by 40. You can probably dunk by the time you're 40.
Okay. I also think we should bring back that's what she said yeah in 2024 i feel like that's been it's been out of the lexicon for a while it always plays though yeah always plays always uh okay we ready good show boys uh numbers 43 20 future vert 18 8 99 pugs.
I was going to do 99, but I wasn't going to do that to you, pug. I will do 77.
Did we fall in there or no? We're clean. 57.
57. 57.
57. Yeah, i saw that max you're a little nervous love you guys all for the gram it's just love the gram oh wait Shit.
Take on me. Shining away I'll be coming for your love A pretty day

Take on me

Take on me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me Thank you. And I dream of you So needless to say I've all said it But I'll be stumbling away Slowly learning that life is okay Say after me Is it better to be safe than sorry Take on me Take on me Take on me Take on me Take on me Take on me Take on me Take on me All the things that you say is in love.
Just to play my worries away. You're all the things I've got to remember.
You're shying away. I'll be coming for you anyway.
Take on me Take on me Take me Take on me I'll be gone Take on me Take on me Take on me Take on me Take on me Take on me Take on me Take on me. Take on me.

Take on me.

Take me.

Take on me.