Booger McFarland, Stavros Halkias, The 2023 Bonk List And Dan Quinn To The Commanders

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On today's Pardon My Take, we've got a twofer for the people. We got a good friend, Boog, Booger McFarland, talking about what it's like playing in a Super Bowl, talking about the playoffs, a little draft talk, great catching up with him and then then we have our good friend Stavros Halkius on, which I'm going to say right now is must listen because Stav, diehard Ravens fan, has basically been in a hole since Sunday, has not done any media, has not talked to anyone.
So we got basically his instant reactions after. Also, just so you know, he yelled very loud a couple times so uh he was yelling so loud that his his own airpods couldn't handle it it was great though it was muscler he got like pure uh uncut stav yeah his genuine reaction and just it's a lot of rage it's a lot of coping but it's pleasant to listen to in your life it's it's exactly what if the aw, when they love when one of our teams loses and you get to drink our tears, that's exactly what you get to do with Stav.
Especially if you're a Chiefs fan, you're going to really love this one. We're going to talk about some new coaches.
We have the 2023 bonk list, and then we're going to finish with Fyre Fest. There's making a sandwich, and then there's crafting a sandwich.
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No place to hang out or washin' And then I can't blame all of the sun Oh no We're gonna rock down to Electric Avenue And then we'll take it higher Oh we're gonna rock down to Electric Avenue It's Part of My Take presented by Barstool Sports Welcome to Part part of my take. Today is Fri-Yay, February 2nd, and PFT has a new coach.
All right. Dan Quinn, baby.
He was number one on my big board, and ladies and gentlemen, we got him. Yeah.
So you'll get the actual instant reaction because the news broke while we were interviewing Booger McFarlane. But PFT, you've now had a couple hours to process.
Yeah. A couple people in this room have been very mean to you.
Yes. There's only two other people in this room.
Very mean. Well, no.
Counting the booth as well. Hank's been very mean to me.
Max has been very mean to me. Memes is just always mean to me.
So I don't think that that has anything to do with the coach. Jake, of course, has been polite uh but yeah max and hank are a bunch of haters and max out of all the people in this room max should be ecstatic about dan quinn because at the very least the cowboys defense is going to get worse right yep that's exactly what i was thinking so if we get better and the cowboys defense gets worse i think that's a win-win for both me and you it's a quinn queen all around sure um that's good for me suck my dick max i did see there was a release a statement released edition after yep put on the bonk list coming up in a second i saw an uh a statement that was released after the hiring it reads ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha can i guess who that's from yes uh well it's definitely not anyone who's in the crowd for hank's stand-up act like oh got him uh i think it's hank i think that was actually that was hank that was henry lockwood he did uh a lot of haas maybe too many you got you got not enough i think i that was that.
I was trying to tweet what I was feeling. Why are you so fired up about this? Because I listened here and said to you, go, Ben Johnson, Ben Johnson, Ben Johnson, Ben Johnson, Ben Johnson, Ben Johnson.
I need Ben Johnson. You tweeted at him every day, everything the Lions did.
You're like, ooh, Ben Johnson. I never tweeted at Ben Johnson.
I'm all in on Ben Johnson. It's called X.
Then you didn't get Ben Johnson. He literally turned you down.
Would have gotten more money to be a head coach and said, I don't want to be coach for your shitty franchise. I want to win a Super Bowl, insinuating that there's zero chance that would ever even possibly happen in Washington.
Meanwhile, he works for the biggest loser franchise in NFL history, and he still doesn't want to work for Washington. He's an NFC He's going off.
He's going off. He's going off.
He's going off. He's going off.
He's going off. And as we discussed, Dan Campbell got in his ear.
Then. Opened up his heart.
You were like, well, I'm all in on Belichick. I want Belichick just to rub it in your face.
You didn't have to do that. You didn't have to go out of your way to say, I want Belichick just to rub it in your face.
You brought me into a situation that I had no involvement in. Where are you looking at Big Cat? Look at me.
And you didn't get him either. You got a coach who has been to a Super Bowl.
So that's good. Oh, okay.
So I have a coach. What happened in the Super Bowl? They had a 28-3 lead.
Let me step in here. That's a good coach.
Let me step in here. And he was a defensive coordinator for another Super Bowl.
This is my hire. I would like to address it.
Nine years ago today, 2014 Seahawks. Okay, so let's talk about Dan Quinn for a second

because he's an elite defensive coordinator.

We know that.

That's why that's that.

That was a good laugh.

He should be a three-time Super Bowl champion.

He won one Super Bowl.

He lost to Hank's Patriots not because of his defense

but because of not handing the ball to Marshawn Lynch

on the two-yard line.

And then, obviously, again, against Hank's Patriots,

he didn't lose that Super Bowl.

Kyle Shanahan lost that Super Bowl.

Well, they were up 28-3.

And he was the head coach.

He was the head coach.

So he should be a three-time Super Bowl champion.

Just let me cope, okay?

Can I cope?

I just need a day to cope, Hank.

Wait, just looking back real quick,

because the Marshawn Lynch thing,

his defense did give up 14 points in the fourth quarter in the Super Bowl. Yeah, that's true.
That might be accurate. I'll have to go back and look at the box score.
But you were at that game, Hank. Yeah, I was.
Was it his call to hand the ball off? I don't know. You probably could have said over the headset, don't do this.
Sprint it out onto the field. Russell, you piece of shit, hand the ball off.
Please don't do this. are you know calling him a retread retreads run the world okay retreads you say that in 2024 sorry our treads run the world okay um mentally retreads yes and here's the thing about retreads in the nfl gary kubiak john gruden bill parcells tony dungy tom coughlin plin, Pete Carroll, Andy Reid, Mike Shanahan, Don Chula, Bill Belichick was a retread when he was hired by the New England Patriots.
Dan Quinn. Years old.
Second stop. Second stop.
He's going to figure it out. How old is he? He's physical.
He's a physical man. I think he's 53.
Did you just put Gary Kubiak in the same? He's 53. He got to the Super Bowl.
Yeah. Okay.
Yeah, he got to the Super Bowl with the Broncos. Should have just gone Pete Carroll, Bill Belichick.
I could narrow that down. John Gruden.
Actually, let me narrow that down. I felt like that was going against what you were saying.
Everybody that I just mentioned on that list, except for Gary Kubiak, and now Dan Quinn. Godfather 2 was better than the first one that's a fact wayne's world 2 was worse sorry iraq trying to help you there iraq war 2 yeah world war 2 kicked ass it did yeah it was really great we were the winners we fucking beat the fuck out of the nazis we did yeah if it wasn't for us the germans be speaking russian right now just think about that hank you think think about that? Listen, PFT, I'm supporting you.
Dan Quinn rocks. Backwards hat rocks.
Yep. Plays good defense.
Football guy. Through and through.
Leader of men. He is.
And all his players love him. I don't have anything else.
I don't have anything else. All his players love him.
Micah Parsons said, like, if he goes, maybe I'll go with him.

Oh.

So maybe we'll get Micah Parsons.

I have a question.

Yeah.

Going into this search, what tier would you have put Dan Quinn at on your wish list?

I don't think he would have mentioned his name.

Tier 1.

I think he actually said the other day, please don't have it be Dan Quinn.

I don't recall saying that.

There were so many names that were thrown out here on this show for the commander's next head coach, and I don't think one of them was Dan Quinn. Here's another thing.
We have a rookie GM, right? He helped to assemble the San Francisco 49ers' entire roster. Now he's our general manager.
Rookie GM, I think you'd probably want an experienced head coach, not a rookie head coach that doesn't know how this whole thing's run. It's a good thing there weren't any other experienced head coaches on the market.
Well, there weren't any. That have been head coaches more recently.
There weren't any. And better at it.
All the ones that were on the market wanted control, wanted roster control. Do you know that for a fact? Vrabel? Vrabel's a control guy, yeah.
You confirmed that? No, he's a control guy. I think he's a go-with-the-flow guy.
He's a players coach. Yeah.
Yeah, well, the reason why he butted heads in Tennessee was because they tried to take control away. Pete Carroll? Got rid of all his good players.
Pete Carroll wanted control? I don't know. I didn't talk to Pete Carroll personally.
Nick Saban wanted control? Nick Saban did want control, yes. Okay.
Okay. I talked to Nick.
Okay. Well, PFT, you're defending Dan Quinn right now.
We actually have a clip from the interview with Pete Prisco where maybe you weren't such a big fan. Oh, no.
You've got to probably play that. Yeah.
We actually have it loaded. Oh, wow.
So someone actually did the work here. And Quinn, go back to Seattle.
I think probably. But you have to, like, at least if you're the Seahawks, you have to have a little bit of concern after that playoff game.
I know it's one game, and you can't really judge that based, you know, on the body of evidence that he's done in Dallas. But it would make me think, like, yeah, maybe we should interview a couple other guys.
I stand by that. It was a bad playoff game.
Okay. That wasn't a damning clip.
He got a little bit of the Cowboys in him in that playoff game. And, you know, you can look at what he's done in the last two seasons in Dallas.
He's awesome. Dan Quinn's awesome.
Hat backwards. Is there a part of you, Hank, that is lashing out like this because you just lost your defensive coordinator? Good question.
Yeah, I don't know what the Cowboys are doing. Oh, I know what they're doing.
They're actually going to interview Ron Rivera. If I'm Jerry Jones, I'm finding a way to get Belichick, Vrabel, and Pete Carroll on the same staff.
Oh, you're trying. You're about Saban.
You're assembling the movie Old Dogs. Yeah.
Yeah, it would be awesome. Adam Sandler should be on it as well.
I don't know if he was in that movie, but it sounds like he could be. He probably liked it.
Yeah. He probably was like, damn, I should have thought of this first.
But yeah, keeping Mike McCarthy is insane with all these other coaches

just not coaching next year.

You won't be the

coach by October. Permission to be honest.

Yes. Danquin

was not in my first tier of

desired coaches. There were

some other names that have been thrown out there. What about tier two?

Looking forward to. I didn't do

a tier two. I just had a tier one.
But if you

were to retroactively look back. He was number one.

He was tier one of tier two.

I think there was a tier two. I think there might

Thank you. looking forward to.
I didn't do a tier two. I just had a tier one.
But if you were to retroactively look back. He was number one.
He was tier one of tier two. I think there was a tier two.
I think there might have been a tier two. It was Ben Johnson tier one.
Belichick? No, I think it was Ben Johnson and Slowrick were tier one. I remember you saying Johnson or Slowrick.
Okay, well, no more. Tier two is Belichick, Vrabel.
Tier three was RG3. We'll was Dan Quint.
He was tier 1 of tier 2. That's where he was on my list.
Not a very exciting hire. I'll say that.
I did assemble a tier 1 but you have to take into account the fact that I am very dumb. I have some extremely bad football takes.
So if you were me and you were running an NFL franchise, there's no confidence there. I would be very, very bad at running an NFL.
Don't sell yourself short. Wait, so you might have been the reason why they hired Dan Quinn? I think he'd be great.
I think they were listening to you and they were like, PFT wants Ben Johnson and Bobby Sloak and Bill Belichick?

We can't do that?

If it were up to me, every single play would be like three downfield laterals followed by a 65-yard field goal.

Right.

So you should not listen.

Ben Johnson probably could draw that up.

You should not listen to my opinions when it comes to football.

And I had the opinion that I wanted Ben Johnson.

My opinion is probably incorrect.

Got it.

I did not want Dan Quinn on my first tier.

Got it.

So therefore, it's like George Costanza. the reverse of everything he wants to do is right.

I think he's a good football coach.

I think he's a leader in men.

I think he's a great defensive coordinator.

And I think he's going into a stable edition of the Washington franchise, which we haven't seen in a very long time.

And I have no choice but to just get a fucking Quinsurrection going on in D.C.

Okay.

Let's do it.

So he's going to coach up drake may or jaden daniels we're going to get a good coordinator for that yeah and we do have some good coordinator options i heard a kubiak's name being thrown around and we know the history with they were on that list they were fantastic great great bloodline johnson i well, Ben Johnson could do it, yeah. I'd also just, we discussed this with Booger when it happens, but in a way, now the graphic, I might have defeated the graphic, where now it's Atlanta Falcons former coaches on that one coaching staff, and you've got Dan Quinn, who's now a head coach, plus all those other guys that were in Washington that were also on Kyle's staff.
So now it's like, that Falcons team, can you believe that team never won a Super Bowl? Yeah, that was crazy. That was crazy.
I can't believe that. That was nuts.
Mike McDonald was also above Dan Quinn on these teams. Oh, yeah, that's right.
He had the dream. True.
Yeah, he had the dream. Because you do take credit when your dreams come true.
That's fair. So you've got to also take the opposite when they don't.
It was an incorrect dream. Hand up.
But that's not me. That's my dream.
But when your dream is right, you get credit for it. I think my dreams are three and one now.
I was with you when you found out that Mike McDonald was going to the Seahawks. I don't think you were too happy about that.
Yeah. It's whatever.
Whatever. I just.
Stay tuned if you're watching the YouTube to see his face when he sees drop news it's great i thought about that after the fact and i'm i'm pretty sure i heard the news and then i looked down i took like a deep breath and i was like okay i'm he was he was like jerry mcguire when when when they show him getting married and he has that face he's like i don't know if i want to do this or like an actor getting getting into character. Yeah.
But guess what? That's my character. I changed myself.
I'm a Dan Quinn guy. I do think that he's a solid hire.
We've had him on the show, right? No, we've talked to him. Oh, that's right.
We've got to get him on the show now. Yeah.
Maybe we'll get him on the show in the Combine. Suppy? Suppy.
Yeah, we'll talk to him at the Super Bowl next year when he's in it. You think it's Suppy? It's too early to say Suy.
I don't want to put that pressure on Dan. Yeah, let's not put that pressure on Dan.
Let's wait until they go, what was it, like 3-1? Yeah. And Soupy.
Yeah. I think it was 2-0.
Yeah. But if we'd gone 3-1, then it would be Soupy.
Listen, I- Was that the perm bet? I am a fan- No, it's the tattoo bet. He's got it right there.
I'm a fan of some bad teams. So just let me process this and figure out ways where I can convince myself that the future is going to be better.
Don't let Hank do this to you. Don't let Max do this to you.
Nick Sirianni sucks. He does suck.
Gerard Mayo was like they just hired the guy who just happened to be there and had Belichick's playbook. You wish you had a leader in men, Matt.
Yeah. Me and PFT, we got great defensive coordinators as our head coach.
Big Fangio. You know what? We have a great defensive player as our head coach.
Old school football works. Yeah.
Stop the run, run the football. Yeah.
We have guys that are better suited for a different job as our head coaches. Yeah.
We have great defensive coordinators. With two rookie quarterbacks coming in.
I actually think that if the Bears and the Commanders were in the playoffs this year, we could have done some damage. Damage.
We're built for January. Damage.
By the way, I saw Vic Fangio. There was a headline that Vic Fangio, it was like Miami players got caught in the Miami scene and weren't focused on football.
And I read it so quickly, I thought it was Vic Fangio got caught in like the miami scene and weren't focused on football and i read it so quickly i thought it was vic fangio got caught in the miami scene and it ruled for like those 10 seconds that my brain couldn't catch up i was like imagine vic fangio yeah the hard out on south beach being like that's why their defense fell apart maybe got caught up in like the hardcore shuffleboard scene yeah they're like bingo halls so yeah all right listen we're all in the up and up yeah i basically got a three-time super bowl champion as my head coach so i'm happy with that yeah ever had one of those days when it's just too cold to keep working nah neither has ariot ariot work jackets and boots are packed with all the cold stopping waterproof protection you need to get the job done under any conditions so you can take any job out there and always deliver check out ariot in your local workwear retailer or visit ariot.com work to get 10% off your first order when you sign up for email and whether whatever in ariot work gear all right what else before we do the bonk list i did see i'm actually i'm going to change the take i liked the NBA doing the MVP rules for, you know, you have to play 65 games. We're now finding out there might be some unintended consequences.
There are some really good players out there that are, I guess, they're injured or scared to play some games, and then they're not going to be eligible for the MVP at the end of the year. Correct.
So, well, Joel Embiid did get – he was out on Saturday, he was out on Monday, and then he tried to play on Wednesday and got re-injured. This is your guy's fault.
This is your guy's fault. And so people are saying he was trying to play because he wants to reach the amount of games to get the MVP.
There might be some unintended consequences. But MVP is pretty important, right? Like when you win the MVP, you usually win the NBA Finals.
You guys aren't allowed to do this.

I'm stopping this right now. You're not allowed to do this.

Who shows this, Max? Because you just

the whole time against Djokic

you said he ducked because he wasn't hurt

and he just didn't want to play Djokic.

And now you're saying, oh, he should have never played?

It's got to be one or the other.

It's got to be one or the other. He might be right.

You see Max did a Villanova podcast?

Did he really? I hit Max. It's crazy.

He squashed the beef with

me and Alan Wright, Nova Legend.

Shabbat shalom. It's got to be one or the other.
He might be right. You see, Max did a Villanova podcast.
Did he really? I hit Max. It's crazy.
He squashed the beef with me and Alan Wright, Nova Legend. Shout out Rain and Threes.
They're going to be really pumped. Was Alan Wright the guy who got his eye popped out? Yeah, that's an all-time picture.
He called me a clown for saying that I wanted Kyle Neptune fired, and then there was a beef, and then he asked me to come on a show. Love that.
I like that. He understands how the podcast ecosystem works.
Yeah. You call someone a clown, and then you bring them on your show to refute the clown allegations.
Yeah. Now we're friends.
So you're no longer a clown. No longer a clown.
Yeah. No, now we're friends.
Now, did you go on the show and tuck your tail between your legs and be like, hey, Al and Ray, I just like to be friends with you because you're a legend? Or were you like, why did me clown did you hash that out i mean you said ten toes down we hashed it out but i i still said that i think kyle nephron should be fired no and i definitely didn't do all right so then i know you weren't you weren't as heated as you know i wasn't on business no i was a professional i was talking i was just talking nova hoops mac i did watch a clip and max for anyone who ever like accus Max of doing a shtick, he told a very funny story that the day that Jay Wright retired, Max was going on his third date with his current girlfriend, and he met her at a restaurant and was like, listen, I just want to let you know I've had the worst day of my life, and the vibes might be off for this date. So that is who he is through and through.
Yeah yeah and then I was talking to my girlfriend about it later later that night ended it was a it was a Sixers playoff game and then we went to a sports bar and Joel Embiid hit like a it was the first round so we hit like a shot that put it into overtime and I was just at another table because there were Sixers fans so I was just watching the game this is good this is how good. This is how good relationships start.
You set the precedent. It's like if you love to golf

and you get a girlfriend, make sure you

golf a lot so she knows what to expect.

I was also wearing a Sixers windbreaker to the

date. Oh, nice.
Classy.

It was a Sixers playoff game.

But yeah, she was like, oh yeah, I remember that well.

You were a lunatic.

You can wear a Sixers windbreaker to a

Quiznos. That's no problem.
It was some nice Korean barbecue place. Oh, okay.
Yeah. Max doing podcasts.
He was doing standup. Pug sitting courtside.
Yeah. Going Hollywood.
All the boys are going Hollywood. Pug was courtside of the Seton Hall DePaul game, which I think they paid him to sit that close.
It was a good look, though. They were right behind the camera making some funny faces.

That's just Pug.

Yeah.

Good, clean Pug.

Just love Pug.

Pug life.

All right.

Anything else in the sports world?

We're obviously gearing up for the Super Bowl.

By the way, Monday we have a very big guest, so get excited.

Get very excited.

We've got some great Super Bowl content coming.

Anything else before we do Bonk List?

There was a-

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
Lewis Hamilton. Ferrari's back.
Ferrari Dan's back. Live and PGA merged.
Potentially. There's some other stuff going on, too, with them.
Potentially? I can't get back of all of that. I mean, it's not a done deal.
There's regulations and shit. There was an unfortunate picture of Patrick Mahomes that came out.
Yeah, that was... He was upset.
He said they did him dirty. He was rocking the dad bod.
He had a little bit of a pouch. I think it's good if your quarterback's a little bit chunky, a little bit fat.
It's natural padding. It absorbs some of the hits.
Peyton Manning, Tom Brady, these guys weren't in the best shape. It's all about pliability.
Pliability, exactly. Did you see that? Lamar Jackson should get fat.
Did you see that clip, by the way, of talking about pliability? Someone did a clip of Patrick Mahomes' off-season workouts, and he was doing the exact same knee bends that he did in that sack, where it looked like he was going to tear both his legs, and he got out of it. You got to practice it.
It's all pliability, baby. Yeah, pliability.
Yeah, no, that was a fucked up picture. But yeah, Lewis Hamilton and the Ferrari is going to be huge.
Yeah. I really wish I hadn't gotten into F1 because someone tweeted me, they're like, Ferrari likes to bring on former champions so it can remind them that they once were champions.
And that hurt my feelings, even though I, like, why am I a Ferrari fan? I can't even remember. I think it was cool to just wear the Ferrari.
Yeahrari yeah the red car it's the red car people think that you own a ferrari no it's the guy in drives to survive when he's like when you ask a little kid to draw a car what color is it red i was like yeah it makes sense that's fucking that rocks i'm in i'm a ferrari guy lewis hamilton there's no sir sir lewis hamilton there's no sport that i like to pretend to be interested in for like i don't know maybe a second every week when it's in season There's no sport that I like to pretend to be interested in for like, I don't know, maybe a second every week when it's in season. There's no sport more important in that category to me than F1.
Yeah. I don't even think I'm at a second anymore.
I'm like negative seconds. Negative seconds? Yeah.
That's how fast I am off the start. Yeah.
It's crazy. P1.
Yeah. Kaitlin Clark was playing in Evan evanston last night we didn't go whoops tickets were very expensive how expensive very expensive let me know when sabrina yonescu is coming out again sabrina yonescu uh by the way that's the other thing uh we'll once football ends we're going to be getting into basketball uh we have a nba preview we're taping with Ryan Russilla during Super Bowl week so that'll be great I watch college basketball every night Chris Collins ejection ruled I don't know if you guys saw it but he got ejected and he did the meme like I want to shake your hand sir stopped and went and shook Purdue's coach Matt Painter he's a loser Painter.
Matt Painter. He's a loser.
Shook his hand. And Zach Eadie.
And Zach Eadie and then left. And then he pumped up the crowd.
Yeah. I did a breakdown on my team.
Purdue is, by the way, so prime for classic Purdue. It's going to happen again.
I know. I shouldn't be saying this because the Badgers, I think, play them for the first time this weekend.
But they're prime. Yeah.
I actually think Zach Eadie just doesn't want to play basketball anymore. Yeah.
He's just so tall. He's so tall.
I've just been taking his over points and rebounds every game. He's big.
He's a large man. General admission was 230 yesterday.
Shit. We should have gone.
230? Yeah. 230 people? Dollars.
Oh. Oh, okay.
Yeah. All right.
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One also has other delicious flavors like birthday cake, maple glazed donut, and blueberry cobbler. Find all One Bars at a retailer near you or on amazon.com for people who are not aware maybe new listeners we're going to do the 2023 bonk list this is every time that hank has decided we have said something horny on the show and therefore got bonked it's kind of a nice trip down memory lane of the past year yeah and there's usually one or two things that hank puts on this list that aren't horny but hanks and he interprets them as being horny so it's kind of a nice trip down memory lane of the past year.
Yeah, and there's usually one or two things that Hank puts on this list that aren't horny,

but Hank's, and he interprets them as being horny.

So it's the reverse bonk list.

It will make Hank, that actually goes on your list.

Yeah.

What are we going to put you down for this last month, Hank?

Do I have to-

This entire month on the bonk list?

Maybe going out to Dallas?

We're going to get into the origin story on this list.

Oh, no. Okay.
I have not been making one for this year. I also, because the first year I did it in secret, that was kind of the whole joke, and then I revealed it.
And so I thought it might be jumping the shark, because sometimes you guys are aware you're saying things. No, but.
Make the bonk list. You've got to understand.
So I wasn't as intensive this year. Okay, so that was a nice way of just saying you just didn't do your job no i have shut the fuck up i have all i have i have them here but you realize that was a classic billy football yeah you realize that it's still in secret because we can't remember what we said yesterday all right so i need to do one this year again yes i have a partial list okay nice you can you can add to to it.
But there's no... You could tell me...

What does that mean, Jake?

It means that I think I was supposed to back you up, and I stopped after February.

He's got a semi.

So you have a two-month list.

Yeah.

I see.

That's where I...

That's Billy.

I'm me.

I was also backing you up.

Yeah.

It sounds like you weren't.

Yeah, you weren't.

No, you're...

That's what you're doing right now is Billy, because you're blaming Jake for not doing

a good enough job of doing your job for him.

I did it.

I did my job.

I didn't stop in February.

Okay.

But you also were, because it was in secret and you don't want to do it so obvious, you stopped.

No, I just didn't realize, like, again, the first Monk List was all me.

He didn't pass me the assignment.

I was like, there's something I'm going to do because it'll be funny.

I thought that the shine wore off a little bit. No.
wouldn't be as a year no there's no no shine wearing off he did it one time to great commercial and critical acclaim and he's like i don't want to it might not sell us doing it yeah i'm not a sellout i want to be like bvt jump the shark one time only uh starting off hot i don't know the context for this and i don't think this is true maybe it is i don't know the first entry 1622 is just billy fucked a milf at the airport on new year's eve oh i don't remember any of that me neither him i'm not this is allegedly i guess we'll throw allegedly in there okay yeah we'll throw allegedly there's no context i don't know Maybe backup, backup boy. I have, I have that.
Yeah.

He got delayed. I guess we'll throw allegedly in there.
Okay. Yeah.
We'll throw allegedly. There's no contacts.
I don't know. Maybe backup backup boy.
I have I have that.

He got delayed

at the airport. That was

Oh, and we probably were like, where'd you fuck?

Yeah. Yeah.
All right. Yeah.
That makes sense.

One six January 6th

PFT asked me if I had a squirter in my bed.

Okay.

January PFT

says Major Tutty needs a bigger ass. That's he does does The pig mascot is not He's not packing anything January 15th Big Cat calls Daniel Jones hot Oh it's the jawline picture Remember that in the playoff game They showed him and it was like his jaw was so chiseled He was hot January PFT calls the neck concussion thing A cock ring for your neck yep yeah which i was blood up there i was proven correct on that yeah same science and i think you also told us that you put on a cock ring i yeah i admitted to at one point in my life i wore cock ring during intercourse yes it wasn't for me grats on the sex thanks uh january still pft has julian edelman if he's ever hung out With Jules Who works on Inside the NFL Just because they have the same name Okay Who's Jules I think a producer Who works on Inside the NFL Is that a public figure? Backup boy I think Julian mentioned Jules I have That's all I have It was from the January 27 julian edelman interview oh wait no that might not be her there's an nfl jewels that's a fair bonk i think julian edelman brought her up several times and then i i as a journalist i inquired got it okay uh pft says the first thing he would do as mayor cincinnati would the Nancy Regan files.
First things first. Yep.
Then the Harambe tape. True.
Okay. 131.
PFT makes up a fact about the Super Bowl having the most Johnsons in it. Okay.
Okay. That's not really a bonk.
I'm observing things.

I wish I had more context for these,

and I might have messed up the grammar when I ended.

Who should be blamed for that?

It's my fault.

This is exactly what I did the first year,

so shut the fuck up,

because it's exactly what I did the first time,

so there's no one to blame.

I just... Jake brought a rosin bag,

and it was great because it made the holes tight and helped that they would never slip out. Yeah, for the bowling punishment.
Oh, yeah. Yeah.
That was a year ago yesterday. Yeah.
On your birthday, PFT. Thanks, Jerry.
He didn't say happy birthday. He said on your birthday.
So thanks. No, no.
I'm saying right then. Oh, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. He said on your birthday.
February now, Big Cat said a guy hit me up last night

and I almost had to skull fuck him.

When was that?

In regards to Pete Webber not playing in the U.S. Open.

Oh, yeah, there's a guy that called.

Yeah.

Oh, wait, no, we already talked to him.

Yeah, yeah, remember?

We tried a few times.

I think Pete Webber actually played in the qualifying this year.

So I think he might be back.

So skull fucking works.

Yeah, so we did it.

February 2nd, Big Cat decided to have another kid yep yep okay fair big cat told jake his mom was hot if you're that hot you have to have four kids yeah yeah you guys have done that a few times on my time on the show in our defense she's hot i don't really know what you want us to say. Comes up like every six months.
And she swears. She took my heart when she swore in front of me.
She's like, I don't know why Jake doesn't fucking swear. And I was like, God damn it.
February 5th, PFT, quote, it's bad to go all the way in. Sometimes just the tip is better.
Talking about the Nets trade after Kyrie. Okay.
Oh, I heard a crazy stat today. Did you see they did, by the way, they did a tribute video for KD.
Yeah. KD asked them not to.
And he still did. But this is a crazy stat.
Right now, the big three on the Suns, Beal, Booker, and KD, have played more games together than the big three of the Vets ever did.

Yeah, I believe it.

Isn't that crazy?

They never played.

That's insane.

Because remember, Kyrie missed an entire year, then James Harden got hurt,

then he wanted to trade it.

It's crazy.

Okay.

PFT asked J.J. Watt what his wife's at is.

Okay.

Fair.

Big Cat says to J.J. Watt, you can always just throw a nut in him

to slow him down.

Oh, that's about T.J.

Talking about T.J. Watt.
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, he he does have a nut allergy that's more of a bonk on you i mean you told the guy you can always throw a nut in him to slow him down but it's factual i i hear both sides of this uh i want to fuck the ai chat bot which one of you said that pft had that for uh microsoft I was asking them.
Oh, I thought you didn't have it.

I did.

The Microsoft one.

Oh, yeah.

No, the Microsoft AI chatbot is a baddie.

Yeah.

She's cool.

How about the girl on the train?

You ever see that one?

The movie?

No.

The AI.

I read that book.

Oh, okay.

That's the only book I've ever read.

No one knows the train.

I just wanted to say that I read that book.

Credit to Max.

Read that book. There's like a picture of a girl on a train.
She's so fucking hot. Oh, yeah.
Yeah, but she's AI. Yeah, it's right up my alley.
Yeah. Mark Titus thinks- Why? Because you like women in transportation? I mean, we'll get into it.
Oh, okay. I got it.
Mark Titus thinks it's a bonk when Big Cat said, I have a box for you. That's on Mark.
Mark's a horny motherfucker. That's one thing I've learned the last six months working with him.
The dude is rocked up all the time. Yeah, he walks around the office with an erection.
He says, sorry, excuse me, hot erection coming through. That's why nobody wants to guard him.
That's why he's so good at basketball. Spoken you with his boner.
PFT makes up a pineapple

trophy in college basketball.

Okay. Swingers.

Big Cat says he would fuck

the CBI's golden pineapple trophy.

Thank you, Jake. Learn ball, Hank.

Big Cat said he would fuck Sister Jean.

Yep, I would. For the stories.

PFT says he would fuck Princeton

Stadium. Okay.

Oh, I would too. That basketball court is so sick jake says he loves sitters when talking about basketball wedgies oh yeah sitters are awesome yeah they are at first that tournament was magical yeah uh big cat says mrs k would look great in sweaters comma sweater puppies yeah uh pft calls russell raw what whoa pft calls russell westbrook a good-looking guy he is good looking guy yeah that's just guys supporting guys pft says casey anthony hate to watch her go but love to watch her leave facts yep bumper pft says he loves fucking our cheesesteak fries yep PFC says he wants to watch John Madden and Dolly Parton fuck in heaven

as King of the World Umper. PFT says he loves fucking our cheesesteak fries.
Yep. PFT says he wants to watch John Madden and Dolly Parton fuck.
In heaven. As king and queen.
Yeah. Oh, yeah.
Yeah. She's not in heaven.
Yeah, she's not in heaven. But yes.
Don't kill her. Don't kill her.
Please don't die down. Take it back.
She should be queen, though. She should be queen of America.
Yeah. Billy thought Tiana Taylor was Tiana Trump.
Okay. That makes sense.
Martha Stewart is the definition of baddie. Big cat.
I want to suck a fart out of her ass and spit it in PFT's mouth. She's so hot.
I don't care. What is she like 80? Yeah.
She's great. And she's done hard time.
Yeah. My mom loves Martha Stewart.
So do I. There's a picture in my house.
It's all family pictures. And then me and Martha Stewart when we did her for the court.
Yeah. It's like so funny.
I didn't realize how big of a fan she was. She's hot as fuck.
Who's back of the week? Breasts. PFT commenter.
Okay. PFT wants to see Ricky stick his throat down Allison Stoke after the Ryder Cup.
Yeah, because he didn't get that kiss after the Ryder Cup in that old picture. So I would like to see him have a redemption story.
Big Cat thinks Lane Kiffin's super hot. He is.
He's lost a lot of weight. He's gotten hot.
He's always got a tan. And like, I don't know.
Something about Lane Kiffin just does it for me. He has definitely worked himself back into shape.
Remember when I said that when he came on last time and I was like, you look good. You look like you've lost weight.
And he's like, that's a weird thing to say to another guy. I think he kind of liked it.
He's playing hard to get. No one's ever talked to him like that before.
It's more where that came from, Lane. This is August.
Big Cat tweets out a video and the caption was slap league going next level. It was literally just a video of asses getting slapped in slow motion yeah yeah i know that video it's awesome uh big cat said jackie's ass was out and she has a donk on the day of jfk's assassination she was she does she's got a fucking dumper she knew what she was wearing yeah how do you think she got that fucking rich greek guy to marry her yeah september 8th she had that that old dude zapruder she was like hey just make sure to film me when we're going down the highway because i'm i'm i've got it all hanging out yeah thirst trap my if my husband's brains get blown out just make sure you get that ass shot hey john you know there's gonna be some cameras out on the parade route today let's let's uh pull the top down yeah do you actually can see that she has her uh the the heel move that girls do to show their ass?

She had her heel up.

Let's play Guess Who Tweeted This.

Okay.

Every time I'm in an airport, I've got my head on a swivel to see if Tiffany Gomez is there, too.

I think that was me.

That would be PFT.

I think that was me.

That would be PFT.

Interesting.

A lot of tweets to Tiffany Gomez.

Interesting.

Okay.

Trying to get her on the show.

She's Tiff. She sent me a very nice birthday text by the way That's nice Very nice I just wrote down Lauren Boebert Oh yeah the video Yeah Oh my god that was the hottest video ever It was so good I actually gotta watch it again It was She was getting felt up Yeah it was She was vaping And people were getting upset at her Because yeah there was maybe Some little kids around But hot is hot And is hot.
And it was a first date. She's freaky like that.
Yeah, and then when she was walking out, she was making sure to pass by the security cameras, dumping them out a little bit. She's hot.
She's hot as fuck. Big Cat says he would watch Tyreek Hill in a porno.
Would. Big Cat says he needs to see a penis and vagina in order to believe Travis and Taylor.
That doesn't sound like that. I don't remember that.
I don't remember that i don't remember that at all you're sick for making that up we make a clip of that and just cut out my part the big cat part do we say it again big cat says he needs to see pnv in order to believe that travis and taylor are real i don't remember any of that so did i did i did i say i need to yeah so then that's the quote. Big Cat, I'm just reading what I wrote.
Oh, yeah, but what the quote is. The quote that I wrote to quote my notes, it says, Big Cat says he needs to see PNV in order.
I need to. That's what you said.
No, but you should, it's a quote. It's, I said I need to.
You did say that. So you should say the quote.
No, you said it. But say the full quote.

Which is?

I need to see P and V with Taylor and Travis.

All right, that's the quote.

Okay.

Wait, but Big Cat said it.

Right.

Big Cat says he needs to see P and V in order to believe Travis and Taylor.

PFT challenges Miley to a private debate.

Yep.

Yep.

Don't know the context for this one. Jesus, stop talking to me.
PFT thinks it's hot. Bride's dress got ripped.
Hmm. What is that from? October.
Okay. PFT says he's going to get in his sister jeans box.
Okay. Yep.
And then my last entry, which was Thanksgiving, was Big Cat says Dolly Parton still has it. Oh, yeah.
She still does. That's just respect.
Oh, that was at her performance on Thanksgiving. So we haven't said anything bad in the last two months, Hank, at all.
Yeah, I mailed it in December. Now, this is interesting because I just found this clip from part of my Take the Podcast, and that like hank right there okay i believe and i need

to see p and v in order to believe taylor and travis are real oh hank why would you say that about taylor i was quoting big cat that's that's extremely misogynistic of you well how so because you just said it in a way that made me think that you're horny for wanting to see your vagina when She does not consent to that.

I didn't say vagina.

I got one.

Hank said that Midway and O'Hare are four hours apart so that he could stay an extra day at Tiffany Gomez's house. Oh, yeah.
That's a good one. I have a few more.
It was during football. Oh, okay.
January 3rd. Hank imagining Big Cat giving head to a hose.
Maybe you're talking about hose water Okay PFT called George Kittle's 100 year old grandma good looking Okay, respect Yeah, for sure Good genes And then lastly, Hank likes the Kay Adams show Oh yeah You watch every episode Gaslight Central No, no, no We had an entire dinner at the Combine. I have never watched your second of- You watched all of the K.
Adams show. That's a fact.
Oh, man. The gaslighting's crazy.
No, but you did. You said that.
You're like, K. Adams? Oh, we should get her on.
I love her show. I watch it every day.
Okay. Yeah, sure.
You don't think you said that? I know I didn't't say that remember when stew made the video of him being the suitcase yeah that that video that was last year at the super bowl right all-time video yeah her trying to close her suitcase she's lovely the show's great i just don't watch it every day but maybe so you watch it most days i see clips on twitter occasionally okay the algorithm gets that for you yeah you watch one keep going that was a good bonk list Hank yeah thank you until the last two months yeah so are you starting this year's I will now okay maybe with context you want to start off I know no shut the no I'll do you make your own bonk list buddy I. I bookmarked Sidney Sweeney.

You put that on there.

You want to listen to it again?

I'm not familiar with the clip, so I should never hear it.

Why don't you make a bonk list?

I think the people like the Hank bonk list, though.

It's crazy that you can't do just a little bit of work.

I did the whole fucking thing.

Wait.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Can I see the video? Oh, my God. She's with our friend Sean Evans on Hot Ones.
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Let's see. Oh, some people have unbookmarked, so we're down to 28,000 bookmarks.
Hank and I got in a little bookmark battle today about the Dan Quinn situation. Yep.
The ha, ha ha ha. I've never bookmarked a tweet, but I bookmarked Hank's ha ha ha ha ha, and I can't wait to rub it in your face, Hank.
He's good. I bookmarked him bookmarking me, and I can't wait to...
And then I bookmarked that back. And then we started doing screenshots of the bookmarks to bookmark more things.
You're going to owe me... Bookmark battle.
I love it. You're going to owe me $20,000 if the Patriots don't make a Super Bowl.
Yep. That was one of the dumbest bets ever.
In the moment, I was like, don't do this, Hank. I think I was drunk.
No. It was after- I know exactly where we were.
I was vlogging. We were in an Ohio hotel- Eating pizza in the lobby.
Eating pizza in the lobby, and you were just feeling yourself. Well, he was very, very hungry that day.
Because he hadn't basically gotten to eat at all. Yeah.
Yeah. Keep you from eating.
Max actually. Manus the Manus.
Because we were landing in Vegas in the afternoon. And Max was like, should we eat before or after we record the show? And I.
I ate this. No, but I could feel that.
This is gaslighting. no hank was kind of looking at me like don't you stop me from eating me an adult that can totally get my own food you're gonna fucking make me not eat dinner you act like you're not the the the mom of the show that's running the show like but you can eat the agenda you're like all right this is the day to day schedule nowhere was their breakfast it's fine everyone knows everyone knows how how it goes i just wanted to know when we could record the show i know but i saw the core out of the corner of my eye hank was like they're not gonna let me eat dinner again you can eat at any time you want all right we'll keep that in mind.
Okay. See when that turns off.
Well, no.

I mean, there's times when we're working that you could eat before we work. Interesting.

All right.

You could plan it.

It's changing.

You could eat whenever we're not scheduled for stuff.

I think when we're together as a band of brothers on the road, we do everything together.

That's how I like to operate with my ... You're become a little bit more of a diva.

You do everything on your own.

What?

And it's like you don't want to eat with ...

What do I do on my own?

You don't want to ... You eat on your own.

You don't want to eat with the people. I don't even think I ate breakfast that morning.
We should start packing snack bags for Hank. Yeah.
It's like,

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it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it What? And it's like you don't want to eat with me. What do I do on my own? You eat on your own.
You don't want to eat with the people. I don't even think I ate breakfast that morning.
We should start packing snack bags for Hank. Yeah.
Just like granola bars, peanuts. It's a great bonding experience.
The only diva thing I do is that when you guys want to go to the bar, I'm like, I have one night where I can go to sleep. And I say, I'm going to go to my room and go to sleep.
That that's like the opposite of diva and you're like no i want i want you to be here so you can tell me when to eat i'm basically your dominatrix you walk in host this table for six and one please i'll be in the back room oh well hank i'll you know what i'm gonna make sure that you eat all vegas thank you okay i? I'm going to be stuffing you with food. Actually, Hank should just eat at the Wynn buffet every meal.
Yeah. That should be what you have to do.
Just do that. Just schedule it out.
You're getting three hours a day to eat. Great.
All right. Perfect.
Okay. Speaking of, let's get to our interviews with Booger and Stav.
When your home system or appliance breaks down, American Home Shield will help fix or replace the covered item, no matter its age. Visit AHS.com slash listen for 20% off any plan.
See AHS.com slash contracts for coverage details, limitations, and exclusions. Okay, here he is, Booger McFarland.
Okay, we now welcome on one of our favorite guests, very good friend of the show. It is Booger McFarland.
We figured we hadn't talked to him in a while. We're getting close to the end of football season and we don't talk to you for a few months, so we wanted to have you on, talk some ball, talk some what's going on in Boog's life.
So thanks for joining us, Boog. How's it going? I mean, just straight up, like, end of football season.
How are you feeling? Because I know we mentally are tired, but we also hate that football is about to end. Yeah, what's up, fellas? I'm glad everybody's doing well.
Yeah, I feel the same way, man. I mean, if you think about it, it's a grind-off football season, and we look forward to the grind.
But at a certain point, the grind kind of wears on you. Like, man, I can't wait till this travel ends.
I can't wait till I stop getting on and off a plane, having to sit there and talk

about the same old topics over and over and over. And then once you get down to one last game left,

you're like, man, what the hell am I going to do with my life for the next four or five months?

So it's bittersweet. I enjoy doing this.
I know you guys enjoy doing what you guys do,

but it's always kind of sad when we get to the point where there's only one football game left. Yeah.
You get down to the last game, and I agree with you. At the end of the season and maybe to a certain extent at the start of the playoffs, it's the same topics over and over again.
Dallas Cowboys losing. Is Dak the guy, et cetera, et cetera.
But then you get to that one last game, and you're like, I really want to squeeze every drop of football juice out of this one game so I'm going to get way too detailed in my analysis of the Chiefs and the 49ers yeah way too detailed but before we go any further let's stop I feel I feel like I would be doing a disservice if I didn't say happy birthday to my guy I was in and hopefully I got this. I was looking on social media that you celebrated a birthday recently, PFT? I did, yeah.
It was yesterday. Thank you, Booger.
That's very nice of you. Fucked up.
Well, I just want to say happy birthday. I didn't get a chance to say it yesterday.
I was going to text you, but I knew we would be talking this morning. Happy birthday.
How old are we? 40? What? 45? 50? I'm 39. I'm 39.
I appreciate that. Because I'm so wise, you think I'm older.
But actually, no, I'm just a spry 39-year-old. Yeah, I'm actually older than PFT.
Well, first of all, he looks older. You just look fatter.
That's kind of the way I look at it. I was just getting even meaner and meaner.
Booger, do you know, is there anybody else that you'd like to wish a happy birthday to? Not really. Who else? Okay.
It was Big Cat's birthday on Tuesday. Yeah.
Oh, it was your birthday? Listen. I'm a day older than PFT.
I actually, you know what, Booger? I don't care because men shouldn't know each other's birthdays. That's a fact.
This is true. The only person's birthday you should know, family members, kids, and your wife.
Anybody else. If you know your best friend's birthday or your homeboy's birthday to me that's a little weird because even though we're best friends like we're not trying to exchange gifts i'm not gonna call you right be like hey bro happy birthday right let's go hang out you know i'm saying yeah right kind of sus i just need one you need what it really is is is male friendship is you need one guy in your group who knows everyone's birthday so then they send the text text being like, happy birthday, this person.
And then you're like, oh, yeah, happy birthday. And I never have to learn a birthday.
But yeah, it was my birthday Tuesday, whatever. You don't like me anyway.
But thank you, Booger. That was really nice of you.
First of all, you're welcome. Second of all, I do like you.
I only tease you about your weight and about your ability to control your donut cravings because I do like you. And at some point, 20 years from now, when we're done with all this stuff we're doing, I want us to be able to sit back, drink some stellar blue coffee, and reminisce about the good old days when I ripped you to death.
Yeah, so you'll be able to do that. You'll be sitting at my gravesite, and you'll be able to talk to me, and it'll be fine.
We'll have fun. You bring some donuts to my grave when I die at like 55.
You're not going dead at 55 big guy it is true though like guys guys shouldn't know it's not friendship is not about knowing each other's birthdays it's about knowing what to make fun of the other guy for yeah that's how we say that we love you it's really when it comes to like i don't know if you have this booger but like i'll go like i'm done with the bachelor parties but like i'll go on a guy's trip and at the end of the guy's trip i'll actually sit my friends down and i'll just ask them like three or four questions that i can bring back to my wife because i know she's gonna be like what's going on with this person what's going on with this person because when you're hanging out you're not talking about that stuff you're not like hey how's your day-to-day life it's amazing the amount of questions my wife, well, why'd he do that? Like, I don't know. I never asked him.
Yeah, right. Like, what's going on with this? I don't even know what my friends do for a living.
I don't care. Like, I know they're happy.
They'll tell me if there's a problem. Like, if they ever need me, I'm there for them.
But other than that, like, we just, you know, talk about the game. Hang out.
Exactly. Talk about the game.
What do you want to order? What are we going to eat? How much of it are we going to eat? And when are we going to do it again? That's it. The eating part is like family vacations.
It's like if you didn't have the meals, you can't go on a family vacation because you got to be like, all right, what are we going to do for lunch? All right, where are we going to eat dinner? Okay, day's over. I mean, that's it.
That's pretty much the highlight of the day, buddy. Alright, I like this.
Adult male friendship is, it is funny, the quirks that we all have, that we all share and we don't realize until we say it out loud. Booger, I wanted to start, we're going to talk a little Super Bowl, but I wanted to start with something you're hot on on Twitter.
I saw this yesterday.

So Jeff Halfley gets hired by the Green Bay Packers, his defensive coordinator,

gets hired away from Boston College, which he had been doing a pretty good job there.

And you pointed out that this is going to start happening left and right

when it comes to college sports because it's so hard to recruit, to re-recruit,

Transfer Portal, NIL, that we're going to start losing a lot of good coaches from college for what's kind of a step down in terms of coordinator position. What's the fix? Because you're right.
I think this is going to be a trend. Yeah, you know what? I don't know what the fix is.
I can throw out a bunch of ideas. I think college football needs a CBA to kind of govern this because it's clear that the federal government is not going to step in because the laws differ from state to state.
So I don't think the federal government is going to step in. That's number one.
Number two, I think there needs to be a one-time transfer period. Right now, you've got a fall transfer portal period.
You've got a spring transfer portal period. Like as soon as the season's over, think about after you've come out of your worst meeting or you come out of your worst event, if somebody asked you a about the person you met with like you'd be like man he sucks but if you had a couple months to cool off you'd be like you know what he was probably trying to tell me something I really needed to hear but I didn't want to hear because we don't want to hear bad news and that's what happens to these kids after the season when you can transfer in December like if they didn't play well or they didn't get as much playing time and said, hey, it's going to be competition.
Prime example. Let's look at the Ohio State quarterback, Kyle McCord, 11 and one.
You lost to Michigan. And from what I heard, he went into Ryan Day's office and he wanted to be guaranteed the starting job the next year.
Well, the starting job wasn't guaranteed. So him and his dad took their ball and they left and they ran.
Well, guess what? If he couldn't transfer until the spring, do you think Kyle McCoy would have come back, maybe worked on some of his short shortcomings, maybe gotten a little better. And then in the spring, if you go through spring practice and you still want to transfer, okay, I can deal with that.
But some of the emotional transfers that happened in December, I think will be cut out. Other things you could do.
I'm all for guys making money. But name, image, and likeness was put in place just for that.
What has turned into now is free agency. I got guys calling me saying, yeah, we're in negotiations with Florida State right now.
And if negotiations don't go well, we're going to the portal. What? Negotiation? That's where we are right now.
And I love college football, guys. I know there's nothing that we love more than sitting up on a Saturday morning, prepping, getting ready for college football.
It's different than the NFL. Even though there's much more money involved in the National Football League, how much do we enjoy college football and the reasons we enjoy it? I just don't want to lose it.
feel like we're trending toward losing our Saturdays because I don't want Saturday I don't want Saturdays to be like Sundays like there's a difference between Saturday and Sunday and I want to keep that the same I agree yep I wholeheartedly agree absolutely and you're right I think that college football was broken for a very long time in terms of the money that was going to the schools to the organizations to the conferences and then the players weren't getting anything despite the fact that they were the product and they were putting all the labor into it and now it seems like the lack of any rules whatsoever is making it so it's it's much harder to enjoy the sport enjoy the identity of the team that you thought that you used to be so like deeply emotionally involved in and i don't know what it is like with the cba i don't know who's going to put that in place. Like, do you think the NCAA is going to step up and do that? Because it seems to me the NCAA, their mindset right now is like, we don't know what's happening.
And we're afraid of doing anything because we're just going to get sued by the schools. If we do something that they don't like.
The NCAA is useless. It's like me talking to big cat about a diet.
Like, it's just useless. serious.
Think about this. They will pick and choose what they want to investigate.
They will pick and choose when they want to rule. They're still ruling on things from 2021.
We're in 2024 now. What good is the good old boy network, which is a bunch of guys in an old antiquated system where they ran college sports.
Well, guess what? The only thing they really run right now is March Madness. Other than that, the power five in football is running college football.
Greg Sankey is the most powerful person in college football to commission the SEC. So if we want to deem a czar or a commissioner of college football, I'm going to nominate Greg Sankey because whatever the SEC does, and I know the Big Ten is kind of making some moves.
I would put the SEC in the Big Ten, but since Greg Sankey has kind of been the forefront, whatever Greg wants to do, I think everybody else will follow. So let's nominate him and make him the czar of the commissioner of college football.
And just go ahead and stop playing like it's the quote-unquote NCAA. No, it's the Power Five or the big two or three or four, depending on what the ACC does and Florida State and Clemson.
And just separate from the rest of those. Have a quote-unquote invitational and determine a champion that way.
Because that's ultimately where we're headed right now. If we're acting like the NCAA is actually governing the Power Five, then we're fooling ourselves.

Yeah, and I agree with you, and I also think that, like, why isn't there –

I know we've tried to make it the 12-team playoff.

We're going to get some more Group of Five teams involved.

But to me, it's like, okay, we have the Power Five.

We know there's going to always be a gap.

Like Alabama playing Cincinnati.

Cincinnati was a great story that year. You play that game 100 times, Alabama wins probably 99, 100 times.
Why not have the group of five play for a championship as well? Because guess what? That will still mean something, and the kids want to play for a championship, and you could do a separate – why not? Why not have two different playoffs? Well, I think you could have that, but don't you think UCF and Danny White would kind of feel a little, you know? Yeah, that's fine, but they would still get to play for a national title. It would be a little bit different, but I think people would be in on it.
Okay, people might be in on it. If we did this, let's play this hypothetical out.
Does UCF have to turn in their championship they won a few years ago, or can they roll that forward? They can repeat it. Yeah, they can keep that one.
And you can definitely claim a national championship if you win the group of five teams. Yeah, by all means.
I got you. And kids get to play playoff football that means something to be like, this is the best group of five team.
And it's just kind of weird to me that I understand that we want everyone to be involved but like let's actually make it so that so that the group of five is playing for something that's meaningful instead of playing for a playoff seed to get killed by you know an Alabama or an LSU or like and it's again it's not not saying they're not good teams and they're not like really good football players but there is a point where it's like there's a there's a there's a levels here you know yes and you have to just admit it, you know? So I don't know. But they don't want to do that, though, because, again, we live in a society where we want to be, and I'm all for exclusivity.
I'm all for making everybody a part of things. But at some point, you have to ask yourself how many times if you put Tulane in this year, you put SMU, Liberty.
Like Liberty played Oregon this year and everybody knew the moment the game kicked off, Liberty had no shot, but because Liberty got a spot at the table based on the rules that were written, Liberty played Oregon in a, in a, in a new year's six game. And they had no shot was whatsoever.
And to me, I agree with you. Why not put Liberty in a situation and reward them for a good season in a bowl game that they actually can win? Because they had no shot of beating Oregon that day.
Yeah, we kind of treat it like college basketball. We're like, oh, well, upsets happen in college basketball.
That's a lot different when it's five on five and a guy can get hot or a team can shoot bad in a one-game situation. And it's not like, hey, this offensive line is 320 pounds and this defensive line is 260 like Oregon was so much bigger so much bigger than Liberty was insane right uh all right other thing that I want to talk about and I don't want to do too long on it because it has been a few days and we've we've talked about it ad nauseum we defend Dan Campbell you don't yeah I don't and here's why.
Dan Campbell has made his name based on his style of coaching and the culture that he has built. We're going to go for it more than anybody else.
We're going to bite knees, elbows. We're going to be tougher.
We're going to be more physical. And that's great.
I understand that. But at some point, you have to take into account time, situation, and the game you're in.
You just can't have a blanket formula saying we're always going to go for it now the one at the end of the half uh okay cool you want to kick the field goal I love that kick the field goal you go up 17 points at some point though when the score is 24 to 10 and it's you're halfway through the third quarter so let's just start doing the math I know you're probably not good at math oh I got math for you i got math for you yeah okay perfect so it's 2014 it's about seven minutes left if you kick that field goal and you go up 27 to 10 how many more possessions do you think the 49ers are going to get four maybe four so they got a score on three of their four possessions two of them being touchdowns to tie you okay Okay? So doing the simple math, if you kick that field goal, then you give yourself a high probability of winning the game. Now, that's number one.
I thought that was a clear mistake. When it's 27-24 and you're down three, there's such a thing that's called momentum, and it's a mindset.
Think about it. Prime example, PFT, watch this.
This is just for you. If you and I are on a Peloton ride and there's – no, it's not going to be an insult.
This is actually going to be something that he and I can relate. It's actually – it's going to be relatability, something that you and I can't relate to a lot.
If you and I are on a Peloton ride and the score is tied and there's three minutes left on the ride, you're going to feel really good about, OK, I got a chance. If you're now on a ride and you're down 50 on a Peloton ride and there's three minutes left, you're going to be like, damn, I got a tough heel to climb.
It's the mindset of being tied as opposed to the mindset of being down. And I thought at 27-24, you kick the field goal, you become tied.
Now you've stopped all the momentum in the second half of the 49ers, and your team's mindset is in a different spot. And so, yeah, I disagree with Dan Campbell on two of the three situations where he went for it on fourth down.
If we were tied, I would assume that you fell off your bike. That's really the only way that would ever happen.
But you said something there I want to drill down on. You said you make a field goal and now you're up three scores.
We're not talking about make a field goal. We're talking about kick a field goal.
And the Lions kicker isn't great. I have some stats for you.
You want the stats? You want the math? Yes, let's do the math. Okay, so I went through it.
Michael Badgley career, 45 to 49 yards.

So this isn't including over 50 because that obviously skews it.

It was going to be a 45-yarder or a 46-yarder.

45 to 49 yards in his career is 65%.

The Detroit Lions on fourth and three or less this season is 85%.

Okay.

So that part is like they didn't trust their kicker. You can blame them for having a kicker they don't trust, but they didn't trust their kicker.
That's the big issue. Well, okay, then that leads to a bigger problem.
Why is he a kicker then? I agree with you there. I completely agree with you there.
You go in the playoffs with a kicker that you don't trust, you're going to be playing with a hand behind your back. But given the circumstances and how they feel about their kicker and how they feel about their offense, just to bring it down to just a very simple level, do you not believe Dan Campbell doesn't trust his defense, doesn't trust his kicker, trusts his offense? Don't you want the part of your team, the third of your team, that you have the most trust on making the plays in the big moments.
Like that's what he wants. If we put it in a vacuum and just say that, yes, I agree with you.
But we all know that football is three phases, offense, defense, and special teams. And, again, it leads to a bigger conversation.
If you don't trust your defense, the defense, oh, by the way, that dominated the first half, okay, against San Francisco. Okay.
A defense, oh, by the way, that has gotten better the second half of the season. Aaron Glenn is up for several head coaching jobs.
He hadn't gotten one yet. We'll see what happens in Washington.
The kicker, I'll give you the kicker again, but 65% to me, I just think there's a big enough difference in three scores. Okay, since we want to do math, let's say he goes for it, and let's say he makes it.
What's the probability that if he makes it, they're going to score a touchdown? So you may wind up kicking a field goal again. Yeah, but a shorter one that he can hit.
By the way, we have breaking news. We're going to break this live.
Dan Quinn has been named the next head coach for the Washington Commanders. Let's go.
That just happened. Left hand up.
Half backwards. Just happened.
Just happened right now. Booger, I'm going to say right now, I love this hire.
It's a great hire. Dan Quinn.
Why? Great coach. It's a great – because it's a great hire.
His players love him. This is instant reaction from everyone in the room.
Okay, instant reaction. All right, here's the thing about Dan Quinn.
People forget he got to a Super Bowl, and he put together a team. He had – his quarterback was an MVP.
They dominated the NFC South. He got to a Super Bowl and lost it.
He was up 25 in a Super Bowl. He was up 25 in a Super Bowl he was up 25 in a Super Bowl that's big if you put together a team where your quarterback is the MVP you dominate the NFC South you get to a Super Bowl I think that's going to make you a pretty good head coach you'd sign up for being up 25 in a Super Bowl right now I can't think of any recent examples of head coaches for the Washington Commanders that have that same resume but I am I have no choice but to support Dan Quinn and you do hear his players talk about him, his players love him and it's also an added bonus of making the Cowboys worse so we're making them worse just to tie the two together, if I gave you a choice right now going forward, Dan Campbell or or Dan Quinn? Dan Quinn.
Dan Quinn. Easy.
Easy choice. Are you serious? No, it's an easy choice.
Dan Quinn. Are you serious? He's got to go all in, Booger.
He just found out. He turned his hat backwards.
He's got to go all in. Let him go all in.
This is actually adult friendship right here. This is male friendship.
Booger. I know my guy right now is hurting, but you got to just support him and be like, you know what? Okay.
going backwards too. We're quitting.
Yeah, we're quitting right now. It's quitting time.
And Booger, you just said a second. Yeah, do the hat.
Get the hat. Get the hat backwards.
It's the new way all the kids are doing. Let's go.
We're quitting. There we go.
We gotta support our boys, even if they're making a mistake. We're not making a mistake, though.
But if I were, I would appreciate the support. You just said

yourself, Dan Campbell goes for it

on fourth downs. He's a bird brain.
Yeah, I don't

want that. I want Dan Quinn.

Dan Quinn, he got to

the Super Bowl. Okay, so

I'm going to support you, so let's spin this glass

half full.

Number one, I'm surprised

that they went with another

defensive coach. You fire Ron Rivera,

who's a defensive guy. You go to Dan

Quinn, who's also a defensive guy. He tells me that they're going to put a premium on how physical they want to be and how they want to play defense in Washington.
That's number one. Dan Quinn is a big energy guy.
He's a big positivity guy. When I call Monday Night Football, I have some production meetings with him.
He is so fun to talk to, so full of energy. He's going to create a positive atmosphere, which is something that they haven't had in Washington in a long time based on the old ownership and based on some of the things that were coming in that building.
That's number two. The third thing is they got a lot of capital from a draft standpoint.
They're going to have a high pick. You got to figure out what you're going to do with the quarterback position.

Are you going to be a big believer in Sam Howell?

Or are you going to move on from Sam Howell and draft one of these guys

that are going to be in the 2024 draft?

So, so many questions.

I do like the hire because the last thing I'll say about it is this,

is that too many times we hire the guy who can babysit the quarterback.

Oh, I love you have to hire an offensive guy to help CJ Shroud. No, you don't.
Okay. D'Amico Ryan, CJ Shroud.
It's great. You get a good offensive coordinator and the Houston Texans are in great shape right now.
So I love that you go out and you hire the best leader of men. I need somebody that can stand in front of the room and say, Hey guys, we suck.
Here's how we're going to get better. And I think Dan Quinn can do that.
And to your point about being down 25, what was he? He was up 25. He was up 25, which is probably not something to brag about, and he lost.
I think his ability to understand a second time around, I wasn't successful the first. Now, a second time around, I get another opportunity.
Notice we got a couple of retreads. Him and Raheem Morris are retreads in the NFL.
Also, Jim Harbaugh, even though Harbaugh – I don't think – did Harbaugh get fired or he just leave San Francisco the first time? I can't remember. Either way, those three guys are getting a second go-around in the National Football League.
Yeah, three guys that got to a Super Bowl, right? Or I guess Raheem Morris was on that Falcon staff at the time. Correct, yes.
Now I'm thinking about it. This is also good for me because that stupid graphic that you guys always show with all the former Washington head coaches and how great they're doing right now, those guys were also – they were all on the Falcons team.
And Dan Quinn was their coach on that falcons team so now it's more like we need to talk about all the former falcons head coaches that are now elsewhere in the league yeah but that but that's not sexy though nobody wants to talk about it's not sexy what about what about the fact of hiring a defensive guy to run the show uh and you can say this about seattle too with mcdonald you hire a defensive guy to run the show you have to nail the offensive coordinator especially if you have a young quarterback right and then what you do yeah and then you see you saw this year it didn't really happen but you had um you had ben johnson in detroit you had bobby sloak in houston two up-and-coming uh offense coordinators that got interest to be hired somewhere else as a head coach in those cases they decided to go back and stick around but i think more often than not if you have a good young coordinators that got interest to be hired somewhere else as a head coach. In those cases, they decided to go back and stick around.
But I think more often than not, if you have a good young coordinator, they're going to get poached somewhere else to be a head coach. So then you have to just keep trying to find new offensive guys.
Like, is there any advantage to having a defensive head coach running the entire show, as opposed to an offensive guy like Andy Reed that, you know, is going to stick around for a while? Well, I think defensive guys usually structure practice and structure things a little bit differently. Usually most offensive coaches, they can never have enough practice time because they want to run every offensive play they can.
Having played for John Gruden and then playing for Tony Dungy, I can tell you the difference is really this. John wanted to practice until they got every offensive play right.
Tony Dungy just wanted to practice to be up-tempo and to be physical. It didn't matter who won practice, whether the offense won or the defense won.
Offensive guys hate when they get their ass kicked every day. And so, like, that's the difference.
Let me ask you this about Ben Johnson. Were you guys surprised, since we're talking about offensive coordinators and who Dan Quinn is going to hire.
Were you surprised that Ben Johnson, A, went back to Detroit?

And B, rumors are he had a salary demand somewhere in the $10 to $15 million range

and that scared teams off.

Were you surprised that those two things either leaked or happened?

I'm surprised that he went back, yes,

because it felt like it was a foregone conclusion this entire season

that he was going to leave.

You saw the Detroit offense this year, and they were incredible.

They were... happen i i'm surprised that he uh that he went back yes because it felt like it was a foregone conclusion this entire season that he was going to leave you saw the detroit offense this year and they were incredible they were almost they were almost impossible to stop the only thing that could stop him was josh reynolds dropping a couple easy catches on like short fourth downs so i was shocked that he went back but i i do think dan campbell kind of gave him a pep talk and you know how dan can get.
He basically opened up his heart and was like, we built this thing in Detroit, see it through to the finish. And I think Ben Johnson had that in the back of his head.
And he was like, you know what, I'm going to do that. And then also I'm going to stick around so that next year I can coach the Bears.
You know, somebody asked me, do you think he's, do you think he's quote unquote, scared to run his own program? And I'll never say a man is scared because this is two years in a row. Two years in a row that he's basically said, I don't want a job.
And he said, I got unfinished business. How many times can he do that, in your opinion? I think if he does it again next year, it's going to be weird.
People are going to be like, well, now something's weird. Exactly.
Yes. I agree.
I agree. And i think that being a head coach sometimes isn't it's not for everybody so you can be a great you can be a great coordinator a great defensive coordinator not a great head coach got to super bowl though and this is and this is a second time and he's learned from his mistakes i'm really looking forward to that yourself into that one but sometimes one.
But sometimes we're talking about offensive side of the ball.

There are guys that are better coordinators than coaches.

Offensive side of the ball.

Who's your head coach, Big Cat?

Was he a good coordinator?

Listen, my head coach is we're going to trust Ryan Poles and we're going to see how Caleb Williams does.

Do you think Caleb Williams is a slam dunk number one pick?

Like, I know we're now in that smokescreen period

where everyone will break down these guys

and find everything that's wrong about them, and you'll get everyone being like, whoa, what about this? What about that? Sometimes you just got to watch the games and be like, trust it, and be like, yeah, he's got elite skills that, yeah, there's some holes, but you got to take the shot. Yes, I think if you're the Bears, because where Caleb Williams is, I think his ceiling is so much higher than Justin Fields.
Justin Fields can develop into a really, really good quarterback. He can even develop into an MVP-type quarterback because of his athletic ability.
But Caleb Williams has enough of Mahomes-y stuff in him that you've got to invest in that. Caleb Williams as a passer coming into the National Football League is further along than Justin Fields has been the first couple years in the National Football League already.
So hopefully they draft Caleb Williams. Somebody offers them maybe a two and a four for Justin Fields.
You get those picks. You can recoup some stuff, and you can start to build Chicago that way.
That's what I would do. And on top of that, there's so many more advantages.
You reset the rookie clock. You can start to kind of develop.
You get him a number one wide receiver to go along with DJ Moore. By the way, DJ is a number one.
You get another guy at some point now. You got a couple of good receivers, very similar to how Joe Burrow has in Cincinnati when you got T.
Higgins, Boyd, and Chase, even though I think they're going to lose Higgins. But you still need to surround your quarterback with two or three really good receivers.
And so if I'm Chicago, that's the path that I go down. I like it.
All right, so I want to talk about the Super Bowl real quick. You obviously played in a Super Bowl.
Two Super Bowls, right? Yeah. You won two Super Bowls.
You played in two Super Bowls. Before the game, from a mental, just personal aspect, what point of the week do you start to get nervous? And what point of the week are you like, yes, it's another game, but no, it's not 100 plus million people are watching and this is this defines legacies it was a night before um and you know all week long the hype to build up like everybody wants to be a part of that and it's something that um is totally cool because the entire sports world is focused on you and your team and like you having so much fun, especially when you get to the city and all the work is pretty much done.
And now it's time to take the team photo. It's time for media night.
Like it's time for so many different things, but the night before the game is different. I'll never forget down in being down in Miami.
When we played the bears, I woke up at like 3 a.m. Sunday morning.
And now the game is not until, what, 6, 5.30, 6, whatever the time it kicked off. And I tried to go back to sleep.
I couldn't. I tossed and turned.
And we were in Fort Lauderdale, so we didn't stay in Miami. And I literally went out on the balcony.
And it's 3.30 in the morning. And I'm just staring out thinking of the possibilities that could happen, the possibilities or the outcomes that could play out that day.
I'm thinking about making plays. I'm thinking about doing different.
Like I'm thinking about, oh, it's everything you can think of out on that balcony before I know it at 6 a.m. And at 6 a.m., it's a long, day I mean a long day the nervous energy started to build as the night went on into the morning and as we get to the stadium and it's like overcast and cloudy if you remember Super Bowl 41 that it rained all game Prince did purple rain at halftime in the rain that's awesome unbelievable that's all I remember.
No question. Kick off.
Kick off in the impress. Exactly.
That's it. I'm in pregame.
What? Exactly. And sexy Rexie Grossman.
No question. Yeah, well, you see, you know, it was raining.
It was raining, Booger. It was raining.
It was raining. It was raining in 95.
Big out. The rain had nothing to do with Rex Grossman.
Okay. The most cool moment, though, was sitting in stretch in pregame.
And you know there's probably 45 minutes to go before game time. And you're sitting there and everybody's walking around taking pictures.
And I could just start to take it all in. And it was one of those cool, surreal moments because I dreamed of it for a long time, man, like being in that spot.
And, you know, I got hurt in the game in the Buccaneers year that we ran to the Super Bowl, so I didn't actually get a chance to quote-unquote play. And so for me to be in that Super Bowl 41 in Miami, strapped up, ready to go on the field, is one of those surreal moments, man.
And the nervous energy doesn't go away until the ball is kicked off and until you get hit in the mouth. And I had some great battles in my career with Olin Kruitz when I was in Tampa.
And wouldn't you know it, here we are in the Super Bowl. It's me and Olin Kruitz.
And it was one of those three-hour movies, man, where I didn't want to be anywhere else. Right.
And it wasn't because I knew we were going to to win it was because i knew something special was happening in that moment uh he and i i mean he and our good friends and he and i battle for years we're doing this on the biggest stage and after the game for him to come up and say hey man congrats much respect like that part of the whole deal culminating with the victory like it's just one of those moments but to back to your original question, man, you get super, super nervous the day of the game, the night before the game. And I didn't sleep again until, like, Tuesday morning.
I mean, it was like the longest 48 hours and the most fun 48 hours of my life. Okay, so another question about it.
Obviously, it's a little different because Peyton Manning, at that point of his career, it was like Peyton Manning can't win a Super Bowl, like chokes in the big moment, even though he was already on the path to a Hall of Fame quarterback. Patrick Mahomes has won a couple Super Bowls.
But what is the vibe like when you have a guy like Peyton Manning or Patrick Mahomes in terms of the locker room? Is it we don't want to let this guy down or is it we got our ace in the hole like we know we're okay because of this quarterback you feel super confident yeah I mean it's kind of like when you walk out on the field and your kids are playing and you look over on the other sideline and the kids that they're playing in basketball are like a foot shorter yep and and they don't have their shoes tied you're like yeah we got this in the day it's gonna be a good little Johnny. Like, that's how we feel with Peyton Manning.
That's how you got to feel with Patrick Mahomes. Now, obviously, it's not to that level because we're playing pro football, but there's a level of confidence that you have when you have one of the all-time greats because you know that your guy can get it done at any time.
And, like, correct me if I'm wrong, but playing with confidence is a huge factor that we don't really – we don't understand if we're watching on TV. But I would imagine, like, a locker room, a unit, playing with that confidence can make you a significantly better player on the field.
No doubt about it. Confidence, momentum.
It's kind of like, again, back to Dan Campbell. I got more confidence when i'm tired or up than when i'm down like so yeah confidence is is is confidence is something man that that you can't fake like you either have it or you don't like i can tell you on the first snap of the game whether or not i might have a good game because i can understand that my opponent and what i'm dealing with and so even though even though though Devin Hester took the opening kickoff back, even though the first time we got on defense and Rex Grossman broke the huddle and Rex Grossman snapped the football, I go back and I tell Kato June and Gary Brackett, Rex Grossman cannot beat us.
I just saw a look in his eyes. And from that snap going forward, you knew that the Bears were going to try to play around Rex Grossman, run the football, play defense, maybe get another special team's play.
They weren't going to let Rex Grossman try to beat us. And at that point, we just tried to beat the hell out of Rex Grossman as many times as we could.
And once we stopped the run, the game was basically over. We talk about playoff speed, Super Bowl speed, how it's like a little bit different in these big games.
In the trenches, though, is there Super Bowl strength? Are people pushing harder? Is it more physical? No, it's not any more physical. Once you get into the playoffs, to me, there's preseason, there's regular season, there's postseason.
And so postseason just goes up a notch. And the reason it goes up a notch is because the competition is that much better.
So the speed is – like, you often hear those cliches about the speed. Yeah, the speed is better because the competition is better.
And so Olin Kroets is going to play faster than, you know, I don't know, some dude from Kansas City who can't play anymore. Because Olin Kroets should be in the Hall of – like he's a Hall of Fame level type player.
So he's going to play at a faster speed for sure. That's an interesting way to think about it.
I feel really dumb all these years being like, the game's faster in the playoffs. Well, yeah, it's the better teams that are playing.
Yeah. That tend to have much faster players.
Yeah, it's a good point. It's true.
Although I will say that like the 49ers do feel like the faster team when you're just saying pure speed, team speed against the Chiefs. And I don't know if that's maybe the Chiefs just shape-shifting into more of a deliberate offense, but it does feel like just looking on paper, they have a lot of really, really fast guys, especially on the outside and with McCaffrey.
it does feel like they have more speed. I was surprised that I saw somewhere 49ers, the 49ers are our favorite, like by one and a half or something.
Yeah, they are. That's surprising based on the way their defense is played, number one, and number two, the two quarterbacks in this game.
The fact that Vegas wants you to take Brock Purdy over Patrick Mahomes, I'm not sure I can do that. Yeah.
I don't know about you guys, but... No, I took the Chiefs.
I took the Chiefs because it is... I'm trying really hard not to have it swayed because there are parts of it that I start to think about, and it's like, listen, if the Niners just want to run the, but the Niners do what the Ravens didn't do and just be like, Hey, Chris McCaffrey, here's Chris McCaffrey 30 times.
I don't know if the chiefs have a great answer for that, but at the end of the day, it is like, who do you trust to make the big play in the fourth quarter? And the answer is always Patrick Mahomes. Let me ask you this guys.
Doesn't it feel like that if the 49ers don't get it done now we're going to start to kind of say well are they ever going to get it done like how many times how many times can this iteration of this defense and put in ex-quarterback uh and Kyle Shanahan and uh the the the wizardry of him as an offensive guy like they've been knocking on the door for a long time. If they don't get it done here, are we going to start to kind of question whether or not they can ever get it done? I don't know because they do have a couple years under the Brock Purdy window because he's not going to get paid for a little bit.
So they can make some more additions or they could go out in the offseason and they could get a quarterback. And there are a couple quarterbacks that come to mind.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Let's not have any Brock Purdy slander right now.
I'm not slandering Brock Purdy. I'm just saying.
You just said they're going to go get another quarterback. That's Brock Purdy slander.
I'm saying if they lose, there is one quarterback out there that Kyle Shanahan is in love with, like wants to marry. Kirk Cousins.
Yes. He's a free agent.
I think that ship has passed. I do.
I like Brock Purdy. We've been pretty consistent on this show starting like week two or three this year.
It's pretty early where he said Brock Purdy is just playing good football. He's – you can say he's a good quarterback.
It's okay to say that. You don't have to say that he's an elite like Patrick Mahomes guy that will carry a team to a Super Bowl on his own.
But he's playing the game really well right now. And no, I don't think he's a bad quarterback at all.
I think the 49ers can win this game for sure. I do.
I think the game is going to come down to two things. Number one, how does the 49ers defense handle the Chiefs offense from the standpoint of can they dominate the matchups they're supposed to win because on paper the 49ers are supposed to dominate the two tackles that the Chiefs have so Bosa and Chase Young are supposed to have a field day that's number one number two how do you take away Travis Kelsey I think if the 49ers are going to win that's going to be the formula from a defensive standpoint if you tell me the Chiefs win the game then Travis Kelsey has a day and there's got to be one more guy like there's got to be the formula from a defensive standpoint.
If you tell me the Chiefs win the game, then Travis Kelsey has a day. And there's got to be one more guy.
Like there's got to be an X factor. Somebody's got to help Mahomes and Kelsey.
So is that MVS? Is that Rasheed Rice? Is that Gray? Is that Watson? Like somebody's got to make a play other than Kelsey, I think, for the Chiefs to win this game. Because if you're saying, Fran, you got to go into this game saying, if we lose the Super Bowl, we're going to lose because somebody not named Travis Kelsey beat me.
So I don't know how they do that, but they got to come up with a plan that way 87 doesn't beat them. I think the name might be – you didn't name it, but it might be Pacheco.
you saw what the Lions were able to do in terms of running the football against the Niners, and Pacheco, he's been awesome. Like he is the best running back that Patrick Mahomes has had, which kind of gets lost in the shuffle because Patrick Mahomes' story is he's finally got a defense, but Pacheco might be the guy.
Yeah, man. By the way, Pacheco runs like I envision you waking up on a Saturday morning going to get donuts.
Like that's how hard I envision you leaving the house, running toward the local donut stand every Saturday morning the way he runs. Like he runs angry.
Yeah. You're not wrong.
He's fun to watch. The other thing I am looking at is the kicking situation.
We're talking about not trusting a kicker i think i think the chiefs have a much better kicker back in october watching moody i you could see he missed a couple kicks and even his makes a lot of them are like very by the narrowest of margins he's a little shaky and i don't i i would not trust a little yeah yeah he's a lot especially in the playoffs. But this whole season, he's been a very, very shaky kicker, and he's gotten away with a lot of it.
But I keep waiting to bite them in the ass and to actually affect the outcome of the game. In the playoffs, he's gotten away with it.
But, yeah, I'm not totally confident in that part of the game. Okay, so if we're going to do it this way, we're going chiefs gotcha defense advantage chiefs right the chiefs have the better defense yep uh receivers receivers who would you 49ers is that a serious question easy wait is cadarius tony playing because that might affect it does it matter i mean offensive line 49ers yep yeah Thes offensive lines played very well though they have but but the two tackles they got patrick holmes didn't get sacked till the first time he got sacked in the playoffs was what the third quarter of that ravens game like they have they they've been underrated very good yeah uh quarterback.
And then running back, 49ers.

49ers, tight end.

Ooh.

I mean, tight end.

49ers.

Even though I'm going to favor Kelsey, but, I mean, that's a pick-em,

to be honest with you.

Kittle's a dog.

Kittle's a dog.

All right, so, Booger, last question, Roback question,

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All right, so is your official pick, can we get your official pick?

Is it Chiefs?

No.

As much as I think the Chiefs are phenomenal,

and Patrick Mahomes and Andy Reid and Kelsey almost unbeatable,

this is kind of a heart pick.

I've been knowing John Lynch a long time. I played with him.
We won a Super Bowl. He's been knocking on the door.
He's a Super Bowl champion as a player. He's in the Hall of Fame.
He gets an opportunity to be a Super Bowl champion as a general manager. And I just think there's a certain thing to say about it being your time.
Like, I just think it's the 49ers time. Like, how many times are they going to knock on this door and knock on this door? It was, we were one throw away against the Chiefs last time with Jimmy Garoppolo.
If we would have had a healthy Brock Purdy last year, if at some point, it's got to be your time. They're healthy.
The defense, I think it's good enough. Brock Purdy's been playing outstanding.
I just think it's their time right now, so I'm picking the 49ers. I like it.
I like it, Booger. I think I am too.
I've crunched the numbers. I'm going with Mahomes.
I think me and you together, Booger, we can stop Patrick Mahomes. We're the ones.
There's absolutely no question about it. All right.
Well, Booger, thank you as always. You're the best, man.
We love having you on. Are you going to Vegas? Absolutely.
I'll get to Vegas midweek next week. And got a lot of food spots that I'm already looking forward to hitting.
The game will be great. Looking forward to seeing the halftime show with Usher.
Yeah, it should be a good week. Are you guys going to be in Vegas? Yeah, we'll be there.
So we got to get together. We got to get together.
No question. Let's connect offline.
And unless if we don't do anything but have a coffee or just have a big group hug, let's do it. Okay.
Sounds good, Booger. Love that.
All right. Thanks so much, Booger.
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Colorado. And now, here's Stavi.

And now for something completely different.

Okay, we now

welcome on our very good friend.

It's Stavi, baby. Stavros

Thank you. colorado and now here's stavi and now for something completely different okay we now welcome on our very good friend it's stavi baby stavros halkius um this sucks because we were

going to do this interview in vegas in person um it was all planned for that but we figured we

still should have him on for 20 minutes and uh yeah Yeah, dude. You fucked up.
Your team fucked up. Your team should be playing in the Super Bowl, and they fucked up.
Dude, I fucking know, dude. Is this any way to start a man who's grieving? Is this a way to treat me right off the fucking bat? Yeah.
It sucks dick. You don't think I fucking know that, big cat? You don't think I fucking know it sucks dick and that we fucked up? Yeah.
Yeah. It sucks dick.
You don't know? You don't think I fucking know that, Big Cat? Right. You don't think I fucking know it sucks dick and that we fucked up? Yeah.
And that we're fucked? Yeah. And that no team is ever that healthy in the fucking playoffs ever? And that we fucked? Oh, my God, dude.
Oh, my God, it sucks dick. So you're doing well.
You're doing well. I'm doing bad, dude.
My entire life has gone. No joke.
This has set me back personally a month minimum. Like, just emotionally, physically, I've been on a bender.
Truly, like, I was sober. I've been getting fucked up all week.
I'm good. I think this is the last.
I have to just throw away the weed in my house. All the, you know, the booze has been drank.
I literally have gone back into like getting fucked up, getting high in the morning, ordering like, you know, $400 worth of seamless throughout the day. Just for me and the team, you know, just it's like a crack den in this bucket.
I'm in Baltimore. It's just there's shit everywhere.
I was setting up a

new house. I bought a fucking sauna.
I bought a treadmill. None of I haven't exercised.
It's my life has plummeted, bro. If I didn't shit's going so bad.
And thank God I have to go work this weekend. Thank God.
Like my life, my my like depression cave has been so bad that like going back on the road will be healthier for me.

I have one weekend on the road

and just being

on the road will be healthier for me. I have one weekend on the road.
And just being on the road, I'm like, thank God. I can only do so much damage in a city I don't really know.
I'm just fucked, dude. This sucks.
I'm so depressed. It sucks so much dick, dude.
You think you would have drank more beer and more liquor and ate worse food on Super Bowl week? Or is your depression week way worse for your body than that? See, that's the thing. I was kidding myself.
I was like, because I've gotten fat as shit this year. And I'm like, damn, I need a little health sabbatical.
Yeah, you were jacked up in 2020. And part of my fucking – part of my thinking was like the only small silver lining is at least – because the Super Bowl is going to be so fun.
You motherfuckers are going to be there. So many friends just go to the Super Bowl.
It's in Vegas. I was going to do a show.
You know, my friends, Segura and Bert are fucking doing a show. I was going to hop on there.
It was just going to be awesome. There was going to be so much shit.
And I was like, do a show you know my friends Segura and Bert are fucking doing a show I was going to hop on there

it was just going to be awesome there was going to be so much

shit and I was like well at least I won't

fuck my body up

and I'll just be at home and I

and I promise you

I've done more damage in four

days than I would have done in Vegas just being sad

not having any fun

and it's not even good it's like

I've been eating the way like when a like when somebody gets fat for a roll like i've been leaving ice cream out and drinking it you know what i mean like it's not even good dude i've been you know what a snack i had yesterday because i ate all the desserts i just put butter on fucking i put butter on crackers and slathered like syrup like i'm just i'm just like i'm in like fucking fat crackhead mode dude where i'm just like I'm ripping the like I'm just, I'm just in like, I'm in like fucking fat crackhead mode, dude. Where I'm just like, I'm ripping the, like I'm, I'm, I'm a subway from like ripping the copper wire out of my house for fucking chicken wings.
I'm fucked, dude. I didn't think I'd be this sad.
And I'm sadder than I've been in like years. This kid, like that was such a fucking brutal loss.
It felt bad the whole fucking time. I'm in the stadium, right? We're there, and it was like the first half of Houston felt a little fucked, and then the second half was one of the best moments of my life, like just how Lamar came out.
And it just – what was so – almost worse about that is we were – it was tantalizing the whole fucking time. Right.
It was like we we're not, even after Zay fumbled, which no shot, Zay played fucking great. Nobody should be mad at him.
That's a fucking tough play, whatever, right? Even after Zay fumbles and it's like, okay, we're fucked. After that first initial, which by the way, that was like, you want to talk about the worst 10 seconds of my life? It's like that.
It was like going from we just scored a touchdown on a sick drive, finally we're cooking, to the fucking Chiefs, these cocksuckers. That's how much the Illuminati is on their side.
They get the touchback the next week. A weird thing happens to them, and they just get the same fucking thing the next week? How the fuck is that fair? They don't have to suffer a fucking – they only suffered one week a weird touchback and they didn't fucking lose i fucking hate the chiefs so much dude and that's the other thing it had to be the chiefs it's buffalo if it's buffalo whatever those fucking fans they deserve like it would have hurt but i wouldn't have wanted to kill myself i wouldn't be thinking like oh fucking a bunch of commercial act like this is this is the most PSYOP, most fucking fixed shit of all time.
Even though we suck. Look, our offense sucked dick.
Let me – and to me, I don't know if you guys can tell, I didn't prepare at all for this. I haven't listened to sports media.
I haven't, like, done anything. I've been in my cave being fucking pissed.
But, like, our offense sucked dick. I understand that.
Todd Monkett, I don't know what the fuck happened fuck happened what the fuck why the fuck we were just doing all these fucking little screen passes and shit and why the fuck we didn't try running it down their throats and even if we had run the like if we even if we had run the like caveman greg roman fucking for running back offense we still we probably would have fucking won that game what the fuck happened fucking our offense got got like scared i don't know why the fuck we didn't just try and run it down their fucking throats at least a little bit but it's still fixed it is also still fixed that ref can suck my dick he would that those personal fucking the taunting on zay fucking travis kelsey that fucking cocksucker getting anything he wanted right god forbid? God forbid anything ever gets fucking whistled on him. It was fucking crazy, dude.
It was fucking insane. So I texted you after the game.
I do take a little bit of blame because I put on the purple camos, and it feels like that was not a great sign. And can I say something? You got the off-brand ones.
Well, it got sent to me.

It got sent to me.

You didn't get the right ones and you fucked this big cat.

I did notice.

You didn't have the right armor.

Yeah, the ones big cat were wearing, it was like darker.

Like black was the primary color almost.

And that's the thing.

It's like sending somebody in a rack of faulty body armor.

You didn't have the right fucking stuff.

And we got fucked because of you.

Donald Rumsfeld sent his cargo. I wasn't ready for it, but you.
So we got fucked because of you. Donald Rumsfeld.
Yeah.

I wasn't ready for it.

But you.

So we were texting throughout the game.

And we texted after.

And you said you're going full conspiracy mode on this.

Yes.

Yeah.

What's the conspiracy here other than Taylor Swift in the Super Bowl?

I mean, I wish.

Again, I didn't prepare because I wanted this to be fully just like from the heart.

But just look. It just feels like.
like well first of all Warren Sharp you're you guys just have him on all the time you put that thing out about this ref how he's the only motherfucker that you know the it's the only time the only time a home field has a disadvantage in whistles is when they put this guy on the fucking field and it's like oh what a fucking coincidence who gets who gets fucking who gets fucking assigned to this? Right. Yeah.
And and it's good, by the way, that we finally I will say what's cool about Warren Sharpe is that we finally weaponized autism fully to football. It feels like it took too long.
But like, yeah, of course, that these are the guys you should be doing. That's so I respected that.
But then it was just like all these fucking calls, dude. I haven't gone back.
I can't watch any tape. I can't do anything.
But the taunting comes to mind. You know, just a bunch of just fucking.
Likely. You weren't watching the broadcast, but it was a terrible throw.
Lamar deserves all the blame for that. But on the broadcast, the announcer, the booth ref was like, as you can see, the contact comes in after the ball and they show the replay and he literally tackled them before the ball arrived.
Yeah, dude, it was so fucked. And I'm sure there's – I just really legitimately feel that it was the kind of thing where the NFL just did everything that was like, look, we're not going to outright – you can't outright fix anything.
Wink, wink. But like if everything, you know, no one's going to be mad if a couple calls go, you know, one way or the other.
And I just feel like that passing interference is bullshit. The taunting was bullshit.
We had a lot of dog shit fucking calls. A lot of roughing the passers that I think were fucking, there's a couple roughing the passers that I thought were bullshit, whatever.
and look, it was just the NFL had a lot of fucking money to make from a purely market share. We would have cost the NFL so much money.
It would have been awesome. It would have been fucking sick.
And also it would have been sick to just like the people on the fucking commercial. State Farm doesn't get banged for their buck because they're cock sucking.
Their whole crew doesn't get to be in the Super Bowl, right? Like, everybody who put all their fucking money in Patrick Mahomes and Travis Kelsey, and like, we would have delayed Travis Kelsey's inevitable Amazon Prime fucking direct to Amazon action movie career that that fucking prick is clearly trying to set up. Doesn't he fucking focus on football? Gets a fake relationship? Gets the vaccine.
So the Illuminati gave him a fucking billionaire girlfriend so he could be in fucking movies. Hasn't fucking focused on football all fucking week, all year.
The team sucks dick. The team sucks fucking dick.
And then the NFL just fixes it so they can fucking go. There's a better storyline.
They get fucking little girls to buy Stanley Cup fucking chief gear now. Now we got fucking Travis Kelsey on Stanley Cups in third grade.
Fucking congratulations Roger Goodell. You cuck sucker! I'm a fucking joke! It fucking pisses me off.
And it's just like that. It had to be the Chiefs.
They weren't even good! That's the thing that fucking kills me! We stopped Patrick Mahomes! Our defense did what we needed to do! God damn it, dude. We did what we needed to do.
We couldn't score more than 10 fucking points. God.
That fumble, too, just will haunt me. And I don't – I mean, Zay's the man.
It's just like, just put that touchdown in. Oh, it was fucking brutal.
It was fucking brutal, dude. It's going well.
Do you have a – I don't want to blame you because obviously you've been a Ravens fan. You've been long-suffering.
Before the game, Justin Tucker's warming up. Travis Kelsey and Mahomes start to bully him, start to shove him around, get in his head a little bit.
You were at the stadium. Why didn't you stop Travis Kelsey? You know what? Hand up.
That's on me. I was on the other side of the field.
If I had seen that those fucking thugs had gone accosted the goat, a man in his home stadium, hey, you wanted to play at home, you fucking Chiefs? Maybe fucking don't podcast. Podcasting is for us, you piece of shit.

That's another problem I have with the Kelsey.

Now they're coming on my fucking corner.

They get to be fucking hot, famous. You know, the other one

has a family. They've got fucking

Super Bowls. I don't even get

podcasting. I have to lose

to the team that's trying to take the

fucking food off my family's

table, those fucking cocksuckers.

I came from the podcasting sewers.

I came from Cumbtown. And they get to fucking just have the most famous sports podcast in the world.
God, I fucking hate that team so much. If they win, I'm going to be so pissed.
And they probably will. They probably fucking will.
Yeah, I should have fucking honestly, BFT, I should have fucking, if I had known, I honestly maybe should have even just strapped a bomb to myself and hugged Travis. I should have just gone fucking, I should have just taken one for the team and just strapped a fucking vest on and just fucking hugged Travis Kelsey and just fucking whispered into his ear, this for podcasting you piece of shit this is for thinking you can do what I do and then we fucking both explode and then the Ravens win hopefully so are you gonna watch the Super Bowl? no fuck god I'm not watching that fucking book that's the other thing dude so okay I'm in the fucking i'm in the stadium right and i'm i'm obviously i want to kill myself it's one of the worst moments i've ever felt in my life seeing those fucking pieces of shit set up there you know set up the fucking uh stage uh you know on on mt bank felt horrible i'm just sitting in that i'm sitting in the suite that you know was in.
I was outside the whole time, but I'm sitting inside now wanting to kill myself, eating just buffalo chicken egg rolls that have been under a heat lamp for five, six hours at that point. I'm just like starting to numb myself with whatever dog shit I can find.
And I'm watching the game, and at least the second game is like, all right. Like if the Lions were in it, it's like, all right, I can root for a team that it's a good story.
They haven't, you know, done anything. Fuck the 49ers can suck my dick also, whatever.
I just wanted the Lions to win. I'm like, all right, if they win, that's one thing.
And they're up big time. And then, you know, it takes a fucking hour to get out of a stadium in traffic.
I couldn't pull up the NFL app on my phone. I was too hurt to even watch football on my phone in the car.
I'm just staring blankly, thinking that I have to make a Ronnie video, even though I'd rather kill myself in that moment. And as soon as I get home, the Niners won.
I couldn't even have one nice thing to root for. Now I've got to root for the Niners.
I guess Now I got to root for the Niners.

They're Soders team, whatever.

I guess they haven't won shit in a while.

But it's just not the same.

The Lions would have been fun.

Anyway, whatever, dude.

I can't watch the fucking Super Bowl.

No.

And here's the thing.

You guys want to hear something fucked up?

And by the way, happy birthday, boys.

Thank you.

You want to hear something fucked up?

You know when my 35th birthday is?

Oh, is it Super Bowl Sunday?

February 11th!

Oh no, stop it.

Oh god.

You understand that?

I'm going to watch the Tish win on my fucking birthday?

No, I'm not fucking doing that.

Fuck that, dude.

And here's what's fucked up.

I had started...

I was making deals with God, right? I thought... I was like, okay, Super Bowl's on my 35th birthday.
This year of my life has been the weirdest year ever where it's like I just by accident kind of got famous. I still don't really understand what happened.
And I was like, all right, some kind of like gypsy curse on my family gave us one awesome year. And then the second I turned 35, it's over.
And I just thought, just let me get the fucking birthday. And let me get the Super Bowl out of this.
Take it all away. Take my fucking, cancel me.
Take my, take it all, you know, foreclose on my home. But let me just get to the fucking, let me have one more beautiful moment on my 35th birthday.
And I started thinking like, yeah, like something. And I was, don't get me wrong.
I was waiting for bad shit to start happening to me. But I just felt like there was a poetic thing of like, hey, one good year of my life.
And we get the Super Bowl and then it could go to shit from there. But no, God had to remind me there's nothing special about you, you fat piece of shit.
You just got lucky with fucking crowd work clips. Life is pain.
No one deserves anything. No one gets to enjoy anything except the puppet masters who have appointed the Kansas City Chiefs the fucking Super Bowl champions for the rest of their lives.
Stavi, it might have saved your life, though. Having a birthday in Vegas on Sunday after the Ravens win, I'd put Stavi surviving at, I don't know, plus 300.
It would have been bad, bro, for sure. I would have done whatever it takes to actually celebrate with the Ravens.
I was slowly meeting. It was so fucked up because I felt like I was meeting guys on the team, people in the organization.
I felt like it was possible to do that. And yes, you're right.
I would have gotten more fucked up than I've been in years. I would have spent God knows how much money on drugs, dick pills and like high-end Vegas prostitutes to celebrate.
It would have been a really fucked up scene, but I wanted it PFT. Yeah, it would have been fun.
I fucking wanted it. Okay, it would have been fun.

They took money out of it.

I was going to charge people 100 grand

for Ronnie appearances at the Super Bowl.

You kidding me? I was about to get rich, dude.

I was about to fucking cash in.

Can I give you some good news?

We had Joe Flacco on the show a couple

weeks ago.

We brought you up, and he's a big fan.

He's been watching your shit. He wants to meet you.
He wants to hang out. Hell yeah, that's we brought you up and he's a big fan he's been watching your shit he wants to meet you wants to hang out hell yeah that's awesome that does feel good and i can't wait to hang out with joe i'm just still fucking mourning this team it's like it'll help it'll help for sure hang out with joe for sure but it's like even in the like in the grand scheme of this fucking team it's like joe's a great example where it's like what i love about the ra, what's been awesome about being a Ravens fan is like we're that team where it's like whenever you're talking about the best teams, right?

We don't immediately come to mind.

And then you're like, well, don't forget about Baltimore.

And then you're like, they win about every fucking generation.

You know, we've spoiled a bunch of big like we fucked the Patriots up a. Like, we were a spoiler for them.
And this just felt perfect, dude. This felt like, here comes our Super Bowl for this generation, right? Then anything the rest of Lamar's career is cake.
All the expectations are gone. We get to play spoiler to the fucking Chiefs again.
We get to play spoiler to the dynasty of this generation. I wanted Lamar to have a win over fucking Patrick Mahomes.
So fucking bad. And then it's like everyone's healthy.
I don't even want to talk. I got the Mike McDonald notification.
I almost started crying again when I fucking saw that he's coaching the Seahawks. Like we're going to poach our fucking coaching staff.
I. That's probably going to be I assume it's bad, but I don't know.
I'm just this felt right. This felt like just how that that Flacco run was just felt beautiful.
And it was it was a culmination. It was, you know, Ray Lewis's last year.
Ed Reed gets one. Flacco plays out of his fucking mind and we get one and then fucking pay Joe $100 billion after that one.
I don't give a fuck. That's this is going to feel like hey if we lose our awesome coaches they're gone if we lose some players because they have to go get paid I get it but now all of that happens for nothing all of that fucking happens and next year are you know you're the number one we you know you're you're what you're a top seed your schedule is going to be fucking.
That cocksucker Joe Burrow's going to be fucking back.

At least the Browns have sex crimp. At least the

Browns can't sign Joe Flacco again

to surprisingly lead them.

At least the Browns have to fucking have

Deshaun's bitch ass over there.

But the Steelers still

suck. That's going to feel good.

If they get a quarterback in this draft,

if things start going good with the Steelers and

Browns too, though, I don't know, man. This this just felt right it felt like the fucking year fuck dude alright well this has been great does it at least feel like this has been therapeutic do you at least feel like you've gotten a little out because I'm happy you didn't consume any media and you haven't done anything because I feel like we got basically like post game thoughts from you four days later.
I've been, I've just been in like a cooler. I've been preserving these thoughts with getting with so much, so many edibles and so many fucking, you know, bud lights that I'm just like, that it's just like, and Chinese food I've packed.
This is basically right after the game. Uh, it does feel a little therapeutic.
I have to start my life over. I have to get back.
I have no more weed, I think. I have to cook my own meals for the time being.
I have to kick my – dude, I was two weeks clean on night ice cream, and I relapsed big time, bro. I have to kick that tonight.
No more night ice cream. It does actually feel – this felt like, all right, I got it out, and I can fucking – I can live my life but god i wanted to be there i wanted to be in vegas so bad we would have to be fucking awesome we would have such a good time we would have fun together anyway all right anyway well stop all boys thank you so much this was hilarious i feel like the therapy you know let's let's start let's let's put one good day on the schedule that's right one day time listen you're not gonna kick night ice cream just like that it's just one day in front of another in front of another and you're gonna get back yeah you're right brother all right thanks boys stavi was brought to you by our great friends over at manscaped that's right manscapes backped's back.
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Ready to charm your Valentine's dates. Okay, FireFest of the Week time.
Before we do that, though, the baseball video is finally out on all platforms. Go watch it.
Go watch it. It is PFT pitching against the UIC Flames.
I caught Jake, Hank, and Max in the outfield. We were able to afford 90 seconds of Joe Buck.
The rest of the broadcast is done by our great friend Nick Turaniani who is a great broadcaster uh so go check it out very fun video i watched it earlier today and uh nick is very funny but jerry is awesome jerry jerry as the umpire he was born it's a part he was born to play his strike calls are legendary jerry was great as the umpire yes he was yeah and there are allegations that i may or may not have used spider attack i can't comment on that right now uh jerry i think called a fair game for the most part and he didn't catch me using spider attack so even if i did use it i got away with it i was told that there might have been some cuts specifically me breathing heavy into the mic uh false oh you left him in did not leave them in there were cuts of pft breathing oh let's go so it wasn't me so i was getting i was getting gassed up there i was told that it was me like two days after i did the pitching thing my arm was sore my legs were sore i was thrown off the mound i haven't thrown a baseball in years everything was sore i it with just grit, determination, a little bit of nicotine, and a little bit of cheating, and some good play for my guys out in the field. Love it.
It's a good video, I think. Yeah, it's fun.
Everyone's mic'd up, too, so it's like a little bit of Nick commentary and then a lot of breathing. There's a little bit of breathing heavy.
I was gassed. Jerry, Big't seen it but if i was if my mic's in there i'm pretty sure my only line was just don't hit it to me don't hit it oh that yeah that was commented on yeah that was the only thing hank said don't hit it to me uh by the way jim harbaugh did his introductory press conference i just want to play one clip i don't have no idea what he said in it but the caption is don't let the powder blues fool you so is going to be a good Jim Carbock quote.
That's where we are right now, humble and hungry. And we're going to, we're going to respect all our opponents.
And we're going to, we're going to strive that, uh, you know, we're going to earn their respect and, uh, we're going to earn our winning, um, you know, tough team, you know, a resilient team, a relentless team,

a physical team.

This is what I wanted.

That's what we're going to aspire to be.

Don't let the powder blues fool you.

I like that.

That's what we're going to aspire to do.

Fuck, I wanted that so bad.

When he says physical, he wants to just beat someone up.

He takes a deep breath and says, physical.

It's like a Dan Quinn line almost. Yeah, all right hank fire fest yeah um we were here late on sunday doing the show i haven't been having you know trouble sleeping i got a show coming up tuesday not sure if i've mentioned that um but we were here late and i've had a tough time falling asleep.
So I slept for like two hours. We had a three hour commercial shoot here, Monday morning, first thing 8am.
So I was coming off like two or three hours of sleep, got here, asked the director, you know, what exactly the shoot is. And they gave me, uh, all of us, they're like, all right, take your shirt off.
Here's a two-inch spandex shorts that you have to wear.

I think calling it spandex, by the way, is a little bit generous.

It was pretty much like a pantyhose.

I could see the head of my cock.

Yeah.

The veins were visible.

Yeah.

And we just had to stand around basically naked in the cold.

Yeah.

I was not cold at all. I was very cold was very cold yeah no i'm just that small so yeah i didn't look that sucked did you guys not look there were a couple shots they told me to look yeah there were a couple shots where they told us we had to look at each other's penises and uh we we discussed it we're like hey we're not gonna not going to look because we weren't really hanging low and lazy at

the time.

As we mentioned, it was cold in the room.

It was early.

And I made a concerted effort not to look, but it sounds like Big Cat might have taken

a peek.

I saw a little.

What'd you see?

Not much.

Okay.

Well, I was going to do a compliment.

PFD's got some good sized balls.

I do.

Yeah.

I saw them.

They call them big meaty clappers.

Yeah.

What the fuck, Hank?

They told me.

They were like-

Why did you look?

We all were looking right in front, not action.

They literally directed.

They're like, all right, now look down.

That's such a lie.

They told us to look in front.

No.

You got to look.

Give us your honest assessment.

I wasn't there.

Tell the listeners what you thought of being Big Cat's penises.

I mean, again, not much, but I was like, damn, Big Cat's probably bigger than me. Fuck.
Oh, that is a fuck. I ain't got anything.
But it was cold. It was cold.
It was cold. You're right.
It was cold. Very cold.
It was cold. We got people just peeking in while we're talking about our dick sizes.
That's okay. Oh, they heard.
Those are some clients. It's all right.
It's very small. It was four.

And Dave.

Listen, you know it gets scared of my dick.

It's not intimidating enough to be like, whoa, I've had that thing away.

I think I'd just get laughed off if I was like a flasher.

They'd just be like, oh, that's cute.

White Sox, Dave just popped his head into Picat and I were in in a meeting with some other people yesterday like six people in the room clearly meeting dave ran up to the window looked at me and mouth was like what he mouth he said are you in a meeting and i looked around i was like yes and then he walked away for two seconds came back and was like basically called me out of the meeting and then i walked out he's like sorry sorry i didn't want to interrupt i didn't want to interrupt you have to come out we had we're doing handball i was like i had to leave at 3 45 just letting you know that was it that's it i mean white socks david such a jack i could have just texted me that on on on tuesday when we had pause here and we gave the big check for stella blue coffee we're playing with the puppies giving the the big check. They asked me how Stella is doing.
And white socks. It was just like, Oh, did you get Stella from pause? I was like, yeah, dude, that's, that's what this whole thing is.
It's just, he's the best. He's the best.
I love white socks. Steve.
All right. PFT.
Yeah, it has been a very long week. I can't even remember all the stuff that we did.
Uh, but part but part of my week has been uh having the pleasure of babysitting billy football who came to the chicago office which has been everything that i remember it being and maybe a little bit more uh he was late on tuesday morning showing up now to his credit he stayed i guess that was wednesday morning he's no he was yeah so he was late on tuesday too well he was on time on tuesday but then at night we did jerry after dark and billy to his credit big cat called him was like we need help finding all these fucking needles in this haystack billy answered the phone and said i'm there and just showed up and helped i guess and then didn't really didn't really yeah he found a needle he found a needle and then um so we were all up a little bit late on tuesday night right get to the office on wednesday morning have an thing at like 10 a.m. We're supposed to be there for.
And I get a text from Billy being like, hey, I'm going to be there before 1030 at some point. And I was a good way to phrase it.
I was like, OK, by the way, the time that he sent me that text, 1023. Oh, OK.
And he says, I'm going to be there before 1030. That's great.
It's great. And then he got there at 1030.

So that was a fucking lie.

So he showed up and he was like, sorry, dude.

Sorry, I'm late.

I was up until like 430 a.m.

Getting into a rivalry with somebody about cheetahs.

No, no, no, no, no.

He goes, sorry, I was up.

I was cleaning up the hay.

And then like 20 minutes later, he was like, actually, I was getting into a fight with

somebody about cheetahs. Yeah.
Yeah. First it I was doing work, and then it slowly came out.
I was getting into a fight with somebody about cheetahs. So I just got a lot of Billy football this week.
Yeah. And another fire fest is that Hank Lockwood doing stand-up last night, he's really fucking funny.
Like, Hank is by the pay-per-view. Gaslighting.
Hank is so fucking good at stand-up comedy. It's not fair.
I was sitting next to comedians, and they were like, this isn't his first time, right? And I was like, he's never done this before. And he was getting applause.
He was getting laughs, tears. He was actually really good.
I was proud of Hank. Stop.
You were good, Hank. This is gas what have i i've been telling the entire office how good you were all i know is is i caught max and pft having a conversation about me and i turned the corner and then the second that pft saw me goes we'll talk about later we'll talk about later we'll talk about later so that didn't make me feel good i'm telling everyone that you were really good this is later because you were i didn't want to say that to your face but you were have very high expectations.
Not buy a pay-per-view. No, they should have very high expectations.
Take PFT's word for it. Do not go to barstool.tv slash PPV.
Thank you, Jim. And buy it.
Not worth it. Not worth it.
Definitely not. Okay, my fire fest is we did have a very long week.
We had the shoot where Hank looked at both of our cocks. We, what? Continue.
No, go ahead. No, it's part of it.
I think you're going to get to it. We looked for needles in a haystack for six hours.
We got hay fever. We got hay fever.
I still have not fully recovered because I went to sleep at, I don't know, 3 a.m. and got up at 6.30.
That sucked. We played handball.
My question was going to be, after playing handball, I play with pros, do you still believe your take about Olympics? I believe it even more. Same.
Yeah, I believe it even more. Josh Allen could be the best handball player in the world right now.
I was thinking about it because the argument with soccer is, like, if our best athletes played soccer. You don't even have just quarterbacks.
Yes. You could even have bad, unmobile quarterbacks.
Imagine trying to stop Lamar. Yeah.
No. It can't.
CJ Stroud. Well, maybe if they had the playoffs.
You could just take quarterbacks, and they would win a gold medal. Yes.
Yeah. I think like two weeks of training.
It's a very fun sport. The guys who came out were so, so nice.
JD especially. He was a great ambassador to the game.
Explained the whole like so much fun who were they were from columbus right oh i was safe all over yeah they took work off they took they were the coolest dudes so much fun like they showed us the game i love the game i i want to play the game again but and to their credit i brought it up to them and they said that it was more the euros get that. Because I was like, you guys don't think – like Patrick Mahomes, Josh Allen would be awesome at this.
They're like, yeah, of course they would. Yeah.
So they totally – they were normal guys who totally understood, and it's the Euros. So we got to get Josh Allen and Patrick Mahomes to beat the Euros.
I think it can happen. For America.
Yes. But my fire fest goes into that little gap there where we were up till two in the morning, which needles in a haystack was one of the most difficult things we've done.
But I also like I find myself missing it because it was just guys bonding in the most ridiculous setting. Yeah, I do miss the hay.
Yeah, a little bit. But anyway, PFT's birthday on Wednesday, I woke up and I tried to send him a happy birthday tweet and I completely phrased it wrong and I feel really bad about it.
I said, happy birthday to my partner in crime, PFT. He makes work fun every day and makes me look good just sitting next to him.
Wouldn't want to do a show with anyone else. Also, it's Stuart Finer's birthday from Slips and Picks.
I got a few tags in that. Yeah.
And I didn't read it the wrong way. And then everybody started replying to it.
And I was like, oh, yeah. I think the cat just called me ugly.
I was trying to say that being with PFT makes me better, like a funnier person. I know what you meant.
And then it came across as like, I like sitting next to him because I look better. No, you just, listen, I've gotten stuff like that before.
I basically said like oh no i love you you know you got that it's good boyfriend dick yeah right exactly so my bad on that but i you you understood what i was i i understood but then yeah i started people started replying and they're like oh that's fucked up to say i was like wait what'd i do yeah no it was very nice and i i speak for big cat too and i say thank you to everybody that reached out selling your celebrating your birthday as a 39 year old male is a little bit weird uh which is why we don't really talk about that much on this show never talk about it um but you do like streams or anything it did needles in a haystack it did it did mean a lot to me and i know it meant a lot to big cat all the people that reached out and said happy birthday so we do love you guys yes yes in 40 we gotta do something big yeah edward 40 hands yeah and then try to find some needles now core is like 40 i would i would

do the needles in the haystack 40 needles i was it was it was fun the only bad part about it was

the hay fever that we got because i woke up the next day and i felt worse when i woke up probably

because of lack of sleep and also just inhaling all that dust you blow your nose and it's black

I'm going to take a break. fever that we got because i woke up the next day and i felt worse when i woke up probably because of lack of sleep and also just inhaling all that dust you blow your nose and it's black shout out to farmers by the way i know we have a lot of farmers that listen to this podcast shout out to you guys they were mad we put uh there's a oh so mad there's a full recap video uh viva tv and everyone was calling them what were they calling bales of hay but barrels of hay Shout out, Paige.
She's the best. I was calling them barrels of hay.
And there was a lot of farmers mad like, you fucking city fucks. Yeah.
Bales. We also had, we disposed of the hay in our alley, which we have like a little strip of grass and like whatever.
You can dispose of hay? You just put it outside. Just put it outside.
But we put put it in a big like mound and then we had a couple people hit me up which is a very funny like how how niche and unique this complaint is they're like so hopefully next time these guys do it they'll learn that you just don't throw it in a big like pile i was like okay my bad i had no idea what do they want us to do i guess either donate it like billy was saying to a horse charity yeah billy was looking for a horse shelter to give it to also i guess you're not supposed to keep it in a big pile because rats will start living in it that kind of makes sense that part makes sense yeah page told me she was putting it back there so we could build a paintball arena for we are we spread it out already and they said also which also makes sense is like it's a fire hazard yeah big mound of it does make sense. Yeah, we're not the smartest.
Okay, Jake, finish us off. Yeah, first off, Hank, I want to apologize for screwing up the backup of the bonk list.
That's all right. Second of all.
I want to say we'll get him next year, but. Didn't sound like you accepted the apology.
Backup boy's a very funny name. And I laughed every time you said that.
Do you want me to back you up this year? Just on everything. Do you want me to back you up? Official backup boy.
You want to see Jake back it up? I don't want to say this in front of you guys. What? Take your headphones off.
Okay. Jake, you should make your own list, and then when it gets close to doing the bunk let's all just take that list okay hanks doing less work no problem no no yes i heard yes back me up no but hanks he's uh he's being a good director he's managing it's true teamwork yep it's called delegating responsibility independent uh oversight yeah exactly you're you're being a leader of men.
We're going to have the same ones, but just in case we can compare notes beforehand. But just a heads up, it's not going to have January of 2024.
Okay, that's fine. By the way, one last thing about none of us did anything horny.
It wouldn't be shocking. It probably doesn't shock anyone that Billy got in screaming matches on the basketball courts within the first hour of being here.
Yep. Yep.
We were taping in the studio and just heard Billy yelling about, no, the score's wrong. Yeah.
We were playing sevens too, which is just a three-point shooting game, and he bricked like 15 in a row, and he's like, just got to get used to these rims. Well, it's a basketball rim.
I miss Billy. I miss him.
Three days was good. Yeah.
It was great to be reunited. Alright, Jake, go ahead.
Yeah, so I botched the birthday cake presentation. I put out the lit candles right outside and Max saved me from lighting this office on fire.
Oh, why? Because by the time I was about to present, the candles were basically out. That would not have lit the office on fire.
It would have just gone out in the cake correct got it but it could have you don't know no I actually think that might be the safest place to light candles is in a birthday cake but they also would have been fine where would they have burned to the wax would just melted down into the cake into the cake my additional fire fest I should have pushed that cake into yeah you I was actually kind of upset yeah I would I would have just melted down into the cake. Into the cake.
My additional fire fest is I should have pushed that cake into Jake's case. Yeah, I was actually kind of upset.
I would have felt bad about it. No, I wouldn't have.
My additional fire fest is I screwed up the Joe Buck script. We talked about this beforehand.
I meant to throw a jab at every little person. Oh, yeah.
Jake said that he threw a jab at every person. His jab was, and there's Jake Marsh, who someday wants to take my job in the booth.

That's not a jab.

Yeah.

Well, okay.

I saw it the wrong way.

I'm an idiot.

That's the opposite of a jab.

Yeah, I'm an idiot.

Screw me.

It was just funny watching.

Idiot.

Bad guy.

I think it was good, Jake.

Don't beat yourself up.

Don't beat yourself up.

All right. Numbers.
Don't beat yourself up. Don't beat yourself up.
All right.

Numbers.

18.

39.

20.

Today's the day.

Three.

Actually, 40.

Someone's getting it today.

I'll go 39.

Three.

Someone's getting it today.

21.

Someone's getting it today.

What's your number, Max?

20.

40 like a melody in my head. 28.
28. What's your number, Max? 20.
Oh, that's not even close. It's kind of close.
Should we do another? I got one of them. You want to do one more? Yeah.
Oh, we have to pre-tape next week. Oh, yeah, we do.
And we have to ask every guest that comes on.

On what?

Wait, did we do one? Shane will be here.

I think we've already done one for next week.

What?

Haven't we?

No.

Oh, I don't think so.

Let's just do one more right here.

Okay.

All right.

This one counts.

40.

71.

I'm going back to 71.

18.

What's everyone else's? 8. 99.
Oh. 71.
I'm going back to 71. 18.
What's everyone else's?

8.

99.

20.

I hope it's 39 so good.

77.

Oh, so close.

Love you guys让你让你

让你 Thank you. I'm a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a fool of a Thank you.
I am a God.