March Madness Recap, 4 Days Of Upsets, Chaos And Awesome Moments + Monday Reading About Kyler Murray

March Madness Recap, 4 Days Of Upsets, Chaos And Awesome Moments + Monday Reading About Kyler Murray

March 20, 2023 1h 50m Explicit

Weve survived the 4 days of March Madness and we're ready to recap it all. Purdue's failure and FDU was an all time underdog story (00:00:00-00:23:18). Watching Duke get bullied, Arkansas and Muss is the Mr March in waiting (00:23:18-00:44:10). Our love for Andrew Funk and UCLA survives (00:44:10-00:49:26). Tom Izzo does it again and K-State may be a team of destiny plus tons more (00:49:26-01:23:43). Who's back of the week including Aaron Rodgers to the Jets from billy's perspective plus we have a Monday Reading on Kyler Murray's video game playing (01:23:43-01:50:38).


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Full Transcript

Hey, Pardon My Take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music.
On today's Pardon My Take, March Madness, recap of the last four days of our lives, everything that happened, all the upsets, no guests, it's just the boys in studio today, because we've got a lot to talk about.

We also have to talk about Aaron Rodgers from Billy's perspective uh I don't even know what else happened in the sports world but we have a Monday reading who's back great show for everyone everyone's probably picking themselves off the mat after a crazy four days getting back to work work. Hopefully we can give you some entertainment going into that.
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No place to hang out or wash in, and then I can't blame all on the sun.

Oh no, we're gonna rock down to Electric Avenue, and then we'll take it higher.

Oh, we're gonna rock down to Electric Avenue, and then we'll take it higher. It's Part of My Take, presented by Barstool Sports.

Welcome to Part of My Take.

Today is Monday, March 20th.

And holy shit, boys.

March Madness.

We are still alive.

And I don't know.

I've just spent the last four days watching every second of basketball.

Gained probably 15 pounds.

Thank you. We are still alive.
And I don't know. I've just spent the last four days watching every second of basketball.
Gained probably 15 pounds. Feel absolutely like dog shit.
Haven't slept. But man, was that fun.
I've got a new winner from the weekend. Yeah.
It was a loser on Thursday. But biggest winner of the weekend? The University of Virginia.
Yeah. UVA big time dodged a bullet because not only not only did their loss against firman not it wasn't even close to being the biggest upset of the tournament so far but also they're no longer the only 16 seed to go down to a one seed thanks to purdue and fdu yes which i somebody told me i don't know if this is true or not someone told me that uh fdu they changed their name to the pal, what did we figure out? No, that's Furman.
Furman's the Paladins. Sorry, Furman changed their name to the Paladins.
But Furman used to be called Furman University Christian Knights. Yes.
Fuck. And that's spelled fuck.
So if you saw those hats that had the lines on the front, all the kids were buying those. They were hilarious.
Yes. I had a Cox one myself.
Everyone had the Cox one. That was as chuggy as it got it was it was it's cap uh no i i do think that um uva came out of this it came out of the weekend smelling a lot better than they smelled on thursday so we're gonna recap everything we're gonna try to do a little bit chronological order even though our brains are still pretty scrambled um i don't know about you guys but i i feel my body feels terrible.
I feel like we did four NFL Sundays in a row.

But we will start with Purdue.

The story of the tournament, Purdue losing to Fairleigh Dickinson on Friday.

Fairleigh Dickinson, the shortest team in the tournament,

the worst schedule in NCAA basketball. They were 363 out of 363 in strength of schedule they also didn't even win their conference tournament that was Merrimack and Merrimack wasn't able to play in the tournament because the four year stupid grace period Merrimack should get credit for all Fairleigh Dickinson's wins and should we do a pizza party for Merrimack? we should.
We should do a pizza party for Merrimack. Shout out Joe Gallo, the coach.
If the coach reaches out to us directly and asks for a pizza party, it's yours. I saw Merrimack play against Long Island University.
I took my son, and the coach was like, what the fuck are you doing here? And I was like, I'm just watching ball. I love ball.
You say Joey Callow? Joe Gallo. Okay, got it.
Joe Gallo. So, great coach.
They'll be in the tournament next year. So, Fairleigh Dickinson.
Worst strength of schedule. Shortest team.
The conference they come from, the NEC, was 0-31 in the round of 64 in the history of the conference. They had never won a round of 64 game.
They take down Purdue. Matt Painter, Zach Eadie, Purdue, the one seed, probably the lowest that Purdue can get, and Purdue has been in some really low places because Purdue now, 2021, they lost to a 13 seed North Texas.
2022, they lost to a 15 seed St. Peter's.
2023, they lost 16-seed Fairleigh Dickinson. Good news for Purdue.
Say something nice about Purdue. There are no 17 seeds, so it feels like we've reached the bottom.
They'll probably find a new way to do this and make it worse, but right now it feels like this is the bottom for Purdue. We should do the Ravel tweet when Dunk City won back in – what year was that? 2013.
2013, where it's like, don't feel bad for the guys. This is their college campus.
Don't feel bad for Purdue. They get to go back to school in West Lafayette, Indiana.
This is, and I, listen, I'm not a fan of Purdue. They're in the Big Ten.
I root against them. And I will admit, hand up, on Friday night when I got back to our hotel room at like 1 30 i probably spent about an hour laying in bed just reading all the purdue blogs stories everything that i could read it's worse than bad like it's it's rock rock bottom uh that team i don't know where they go from here my takeaway was that zach edie without zach edie purdue would not have made tournament.
They probably wouldn't have even made the NIT. Zach Eadie was the only one doing anything, and granted, he didn't shoot for the last whatever, five, six minutes of the game, but they were triple teaming him every time he got the ball.
Their strategy was just, we're going to smother this guy with the tiniest dudes that we can find and just really confuse him. And so he's obviously going to try to pass out of that triple team, and then nobody could make a shot at Purdue.
They stink except for Zach Eadie. It was painful to watch with the expectation that you knew that Purdue was favored by a lot of people to make it.
This was going to be the year if they were going to make it. Some people had a future on them.
Some people had a future on them. Some people bet on them.
Some people bet on them. Those guys are fucking idiots and they should never talk publicly about college basketball.
If said if you had a future on purdue to win the national championship nobody should ever well i was okay people watching pfc so here's what happened on purdue in this game when the whole sportsbook was rooting for the upset because that's what happens in march yeah upsets like start once the wave starts it's it's why march madness is so special you can feel it in the arena you can feel it in the sports book if you're at a bar if there's an upset brewing everyone kind of perks up and they start paying a little more attention and even if you don't have a bet on it you're like go underdog go and you were sitting there in that you're i was the only one having a bad time say a word all right zach ed would dunk on like a 511 guy and pft be like yes be like, yes! I would be like, dunk on that idiot. It literally was David versus Goliath, and you had Goliath minus 14 points.
Yeah, I had David going down in the first round. It was tough, and I did in the second half.
I wanted to root for FDU because obviously I don't like Purdue. When you realize you're not going to win your bet, you're like, fuck it.
Yeah. My whole thing was I don't want to publicly switch sides and start cheering for FDU because whatever I whatever streak I was on on Friday where I was at a point where I was over eight in my last eight and I was down bad and I was about to lose my bet on a one seed, not just against the spread, but straight up.
I just said, I think I whispered to Spider. I was like, you know what? I'm going to, I'm internally going to be rooting from this point on for FDU, but I don't want to transfer my bad vibes to them.
So I'm just going to sit here in silence and just be miserable with myself. But it was, you're right.
They were the shortest team. Well, they said effective height.
Their effective height was the lowest of any team in the tournament. I don't know what that means.
That's probably guys that play. That means that they probably have a 12th guy that is like 7 feet, but he sucks.
Because I was going to say, what's my effect? Maybe I could just fudge another inch out of myself if I said. I would imagine that's what their effective height is.
Effectively, I play as a 5'9 1⁄2 guy. Yeah.
But so, yeah, they were going up against Purdue. They were too short for Purdue.
We were saying it, but it actually was true.

They were too short.

Zach Eadie literally did.

He looked like a cartoon character when it was like a bunch of little guys running around him, tying him up, tying his shoelaces together.

It was Gulliver's Travels.

Yeah, it was crazy.

It was actually too short.

And Tobin Anderson, the coach for FDU.

All right, let's start with him because Matt Painter deserves a lot of criticism.

He said after they beat Texas Southern on Wednesday night,

we went to that game.

Shout out Dave.

He also said that they could beat Purdue.

But Tobin Anderson was like, I've been watching Purdue.

We can beat them.

And then his game plan was absolutely perfect.

He was pressure their guards, the entire court,

front everything with Zach Eady, basically havoc, and be like, Purdue, if you can make three-point shots, you can win this game by 20. Oh, yeah, your guards can't.
You lose this game outright as a 16 seed. So it was like the perfect game plan, and Matt Painter, Zach Eadie doesn't deserve criticism.
He's just a kid. He's probably like 25.
Matt Painter, if you're a Purdue fan, I know's made purdue like very good and they've gotten top five seeds i think in the last five tournaments what have they done no i mean the the one thing that sucks for purdue is they did lose in the was it elite eight i was he leading against to virginia who won the tournament and on a insane like last second play that went to overtime so like they were very close and that one they don't deserve blame for because that's as close as you can get in a very hard tournament to win. But the last three years, Matt Painter, you stink, buddy.
Yeah, but you're right. He should have done something.
There should have been an adjustment made at halftime when everybody was like, well, you're going to lose this game. It was by no means a fluke after the first half.
It's like this team matches up really well against Purdue. If Purdue had – if Ivy, right, Chucky Ivy? Jaden Ivy.
Jaden Ivy. If Chucky Hepburn dropped 27 in the NIT today, no big deal.
If Jaden Ivy was on this Purdue team, they'd probably win the game by like 20 points. But Jaden Ivy lost to a 15 seed.
He did, but – So I don't know if you could say that. That earlier that's that's before zach edy got good and he became a solid passer but that's what i'm saying like produce had players produce had good teams they get to the tournament and that painter for whatever reason the disappointment follows this would this wasn't a fluke for fdu if they play a best of seven series i think fdu could beat purdue probably three three, four out of seven.
Yeah, I'd say four out of seven. They were better.
Just a better team. They were better coached.
The speed they played with, they had like – and they just were so unafraid. And I know we'll get to Sunday's game where they end up losing, but this is why March Madness is so special is if you win one game as a 16 seed, you're forever you don't have to go win the tournament like these underdogs get remembered forever we just talked about florida gulf coast who doesn't remember dunk city you know like you can basically write history and and make careers out of one awesome upset yeah the new market inefficiency is having short players on your team they've been overworked they were too long short they're like job from golden eye yeah it's like a cheat code it's tough to hit them yeah really it's really tough um here's a fun stat in the 64 team era there have been 36 teams to enter the tournament as a one or two seed that weren't ranked in the preseason ap poll they have combined for zero final fours averaging fewer than two wins per tournament.
Purdue and Marquette were the two teams that fit into that criteria this March match. Yeah, no, it's the preseason poll, as much as people make fun of them.
They nailed it with UNC. For football and basketball, they actually do mean a little something when it comes to basketball in the tournament.
Jake, do you think Matt Painter should be fired? Say it. Fire his ass is jake this is unforgivable loss fire is that you want me to read again 13 seed 15 seed 16 seed he's the he's the bizarro world tom iso indiana is a basketball state isn't that correct it is yeah yeah get him out yeah fire his ass there we go string him up by his toenails what's the saying Hoosiers uh in 49 states it's a sport or something Indiana it's bad my team is on the floor that's that's Hoosiers my team is on the floor this rim is 10 feet off the ground yeah my team is on the floor he's got four 49 states it's just basketball but this is Indiana yeah Get him out.
That's the quote I was looking for. Bring back Brad Stevens.
I am curious because it is like a. He's coming home.
It's an impossible place to be in as a fan where Matt Painter has made Purdue very good and they're winning Big Ten titles, Big Ten championship tournament championship this year. But then you get to March and it's like the most painful, excruciating embarrassment possible.
Yeah, it was bad. It was bad.
Really, really bad. So New Jersey is now the kingdom of upsets in the tournament.
Yep. Between St.
Peter's and now Princeton also. And FDU.
That's the state of underdogs. Yeah, it is.
It is. So other games from Friday.

I mean, Purdue, that was the game.

That was the game that everyone talked about.

Vermont, no.

Uh-uh.

It was a fun time.

Didn't even cover the spread.

Was it fun?

Was it fun?

Was it fun?

It was cool.

I don't think it was fun.

It was cool.

It was cool.

Yeah.

It was cool to see them play.

Yeah.

Okay. Iona UConn.
Rick was cool. Yeah.
It's cool to see them play. Yeah.
Okay. Iona UConn, Rick Pitino lost, and then it was like maybe an hour later he was at St.
John's. Not officially at St.
John's, but the report came out that they're finalizing a deal. I love it.
It was very funny. And to Rick's credit, they hung in there in the first half.
For half. Yeah, they were up in half.
In true Rick Pitino fashion, they came out strong. Very strong.
And fast. Very fast.
Yeah, so they were running the court. That was a fun game for the first half.
We thought we had a chance, but no, Rick Pitino, his seed was eliminated yet again. Yes, it was gone.
I'm trying to think of what other games. So the big story from this tournament is everyone just sucks at shooting.
I don't know if it's Sam Decker, friend of the program, said the ball is lighter and it's like shooting a balloon. There's also been talk about the rims because they had to change up the rims and adjust them.
A lot of rims. The rims in both Greensboro and Des Moines were actually fishing.
There was something fishy going on there. Yeah, and there was no uh showcase of that than iowa state who i think they made a couple of baskets at the end of the game but with like three minutes left they were shooting 19 from the field they ended up shooting 9.5 from three it's been a bet under if you bet if you're an under better you're you're probably listening to this on your yacht right now because it's just been every single under possible.
And we have Bob Ryan was right because everyone's talking about the shooting being terrible. Bob Ryan came in from the clouds today.
And so Jeff Goodman said overall three-point shooting in the NCAA tournament entering today's action, 30.6%. Bob Ryan comes in from the clouds you know you just entered my wheelhouse the three-point shot is the worst thing to happen to basketball in my lifetime it has distorted the game at every level it was never necessary it was the gimmick of a promoter named Abe Saperstein yeah Bob Ryan was right hashtag Bob Ryan was right Steph Curry ruined basketball he has like a little alert go off in his house whenever someone's like three-point shooting sucks and you know what Bob Ryan's kind of right Bob Ryan's low-key right about this well I wish I made more threes but but also the three-point shot is awesome yeah like as as a fan of of watching sports on TV I like the three-point shot but it has it's drastically changed the sport and not always for the good I do miss having a dude having just dudes bang down low yeah i miss that i miss just like two dudes banging into each other they don't let you they don't they don't let them play they don't let the dudes bang they don't let the dudes bang i've been very upset about that many times watching college basketball they're not letting the guys bang down low yeah at least not in florida so uh there's also a proposal where you have the three-point line go off to the side so it doesn't...
You don't have a side three-pointer. That sucks.
The three-point line connects to the sidelines where it goes down. It sounds European.
It does, doesn't it? It feels European. It feels like what you'd see in the Olympics.
It feels FIBA. Yeah.
It feels like FIBA's getting its hold on basketball. Globalism.
I don't like it. Nope.
I'm not a fan of that. Jake.
Our way out of this, we just got to keep digging. Yeah.
Make the four-point line. Yeah, I was saying.
And then past half court, the five-point line. There should be a circle at half court that's a five-pointer.
Yeah. That would make games a little more exciting at the end when you're down four.
It's like game's not over. Yeah.
You can hit a five-pointer. Jake, other thoughts from Friday? Anything else? Yeah, Friday, Kentucky got a tournament win.
Obviously, they're eliminated. And with Providence's loss, there's growing speculation that Ed Cooley's going to jump to Georgetown.
So something to monitor. We'll see if he makes that jump within the Big East Conference.
Are you taking John Calpapari off the hot seat? Out. Out.
Jake's firing everybody. Jake is fucking insane right now.
I think that egg cooley to georgetown would be an awesome hire for georgetown yeah providence is his spot georgetown just has a lot more resources right yeah he's a providence guy so he might be using this just to get a couple million dollars more i've heard the boosters have stepped in for providence yes yeah so we'll see and by that i mean i read it on Twitter oh so I don't have any sources I have zero sources although Mike Rapoli is uh who we know who's a friend of Barstool did a did the big brain show with us he has said that uh he was he's gonna be very involved if Rick Pitino goes to St. John's he's a St.
John's alum so I'm hoping he just runs that program like it's his own you He tried to buy the Mets with A-Rod, was denied.

I hope he just runs St. John's like a professional team.

It was very funny after the game because Rick Pitino did say before and after the game

that people just write whatever they want on the internet.

It doesn't mean there's any truth to it.

And then about, I'd say, four minutes after the game was over,

it was reported, yeah, this is basically a done deal.

Listen, Rick Pitino, Hall of Fame denier of facts.

He just can get in front of a microphone and just tell you,

Like,

Thank you. Four minutes after the game was over, it was reported, yeah, this is basically a done deal.
Listen, Rick Pitino, Hall of Fame denier of facts. Yeah.
He just can get in front of a microphone and just tell you, like, this is not what's happening. And then literally walk off stage and have it be printed, like, this is exactly what's happening.
He's like, nope, that's not happening. So some people are speculating Pitino to St.
John's, Tobin Anderson to Iona. Whoa.
Step up. Okay.
Yeah, that's possible. A big March step up.
Friday, we also had two near-buzzer beaters, TCU coming back to beat Arizona State, and then FAU over Memphis. Which was great.
That was a great. Totally well-officiated game.
Crazy game. No problem.
Shout out Owls staying at our hotel. Yeah.
Shout out Boca. Memphis got hosed.
The NCAA clearly still has it in for Penny Hardaway because the calls at the end of that game were just, they were ludicrous. Yeah.
Between the non-timeout call that they missed and also there were a couple questionable foul calls, some dodgy stuff. The jump ball was the one that was, Memphis just had the ball.
The jump ball. And they just, FAU just barely got a finger on it.
They're like, jump ball. It was bad.
out memphis hank what we still did the crying i missed the crying jordan meme yeah i think i officially it's time to bring it back yeah because i wanted to see the crying jordan meme on the memphis bass pro shop pyramid yes it would be nice it would be nice uh hank how how was your friday we're just recapping everything my friday was good i mean it's tough to bounce back uh after thursday but i I had an average Friday, average Saturday. That's good.
But watching the games, it was a lot more fun. I had FDU.
I did wish I was in a spot where I was like, oh, I think FDU could win, but I only put a little bit on it, but it was still very fun to watch. And it was cool knowing that we were there seeing them in the play-in tournament.
We saw their birth. Every time that highlight plays, it's like a little fun fact.
Like, oh, yeah, we saw them. We were there.
Yeah, we saw them in Dayton. We saw it coming.
We bet all, yeah, we had like the FDU in that game, and then they went and won the next game. It was awesome.
The whole thing was great. So FDU is a memorable.
Something about being in a sports book for three days straight, and we were just eating. I think I i ate chinese food pizza and uh burger every day with a milkshake to like ease my i was using milkshake as tums yeah yeah it was good because it kind of coats the stomach a little bit like they should make a pepto bismol flavored milkshake that'd be good i seriously was like yeah i need a milkshake i'm starting to get a little heartburn i think uh that we should bring a sun lamp next next year because we forgot what time of day it was.
We forgot what day it was, too. It was just we're at war.
I was saying next year we should have at the airport a parade or something, like bring our boys home when we come back. Not to minimize war, but when we're fighting for everything in March Madness, I would like to come back to a dog like, you know, jumping in our lap and a big sign that says, welcome home, boys.
It would be nice. It would be nice.
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I'm out of here. Went, worked out, walked out of the gym, put my hands in my pockets.
My headphones were in my pockets the whole time. So that was where my brain capacity was at on Saturday when I woke up.
So I also went to the gym on Saturday morning. I went down to the gym that we had down in the fourth floor yeah of our hotel and there's a guy that's walking on the treadmill and he's wearing like a hot boy walk sweatsuit yeah and he's he's got like his hat pulled down real low and that's the only treadmill that's open and he's walking and i get on there and i start running you know kind of a big dick move except on the treadmill you start running next to the guy that's just walking and i look over i glanced over at him and he looks back at me and it's dave and dave gave me this look like why the fuck are you running yeah while i'm walking and i was like yeah that's fair so he gets off the treadmill i'm thinking i'm gonna do about i don't know two three miles something something like enough to get a little sweat going i made it for a quarter of a mile and then i was and then i was like i have to walk my body is not ready for this i've been watching basketball for two days exercise is not it's not going to work out this morning yeah so yeah i jogged a quarter mile on saturday that's huge yeah yeah dave does his hot boy walks when we were in boston for uh conference championship week i had a similar experience where i was lifting no big deal and he was doing his hot boy walk and we had like a glance to each other like don't take a picture of me i won't take a picture of you yeah it's like you know the content the gym is the one place that you got to kind of try to shut it off yeah so i didn't want to see him like taking a picture of me like benching like 100 pounds being weak and shit i wish you had taken a picture of me in my first quarter mile yeah i bet you way more than that by the way uh okay saturday it's great to know the duke is still a bunch of soft pussy boys they got bullied tennessee bullied the fuck out of duke well it's uh it's coach k's players you know yeah we gotta wait till john shire reloads i'm sure he's gonna get a great recruiting class in yep but you know there's only you can't you can't make chicken salad out of chicken shit all the time.
Yeah, you can't. You have to retrain all of these players.
You have to beat the Duke out of them. Yeah, right.
And Tennessee did. They beat the Duke out of them.
Shout out Rick Barnes. Apparently, all Rick Barnes needed was to have absolutely zero expectations on him.
All the injuries. And he knows how to coach in March now.
Yeah, and the center for Tennessee, who – what was his name? Plavich or something? Plavich. Oh, Plavich.
I got to look it up. That guy just coming out, he was like, you know what I'm going to do? I'm just going to try to literally knock out Kyle Filipowski.
Just elbows all day. Filipowski got caught with a nasty elbow early, and then he went back to his old bag of tricks, elbowed some guy in the nipple on Duke, knocked him down, and they called Duke for a blocking foul.

So, yeah, I think it was FAU's coach.

He said, yeah, it was Dusty May.

He said, we're going to have to study Australian rugby rules and get ready for the Vols.

Yeah.

So he knows that it's going to be, they're going to come out there and just try to knock him down.

It was just fun.

It was fun to watch a team just bully Duke around.

And Hank, sorry for your Blue Devils.

You do have to get a cat now.

I do not uh but yeah it was an ugly game they got the the first elbow in the head that was the game yeah yeah well you know what it was it was the game was decided well before that before the boys even stepped on the court because shire wasn't wearing the sweatshirt yeah they were wearing the same sweaters different color black which kind of were cool yeah the gray one was way better for their own funeral walked right into that one yeah he did he did so where does duke go from here hank i think like you said they gotta they gotta re-recruit reload get some toughness get some toughness i'm willing to go down to to durham and elbow everyone on duke if they need someone to to give them some game experience. I'll just sit there and I'll just swing my elbows in everyone's face.
It's not – that wasn't Duke basketball. Duke would never elbow or hit with a forearm one of their fiercest rivals in the face.
No, no. It would never happen.
They got to get that edge back. They got to get the edge back.
They got to get the dog in. They were soft.
They were very soft. But it was great.
It was great watching Duke lose. It was always fun watching Duke.
That was a great color matchup, too. Yeah.
The Tennessee orange and the Duke blue. It was nice.
It was pleasant to watch. My only complaint is I kind of needed John Shire to go a little deeper so that I could start my resume of hate.
There's nothing to hate about him. Right.
Like him going out where Duke just gets physically bullied, it doesn't do anything for me. You know what you can do already.
But still winning the ACC championship, it's like it's still an okay season. But it was a really down year for the ACC.
Yeah, it's not enough to hate, though. He wasn't ready for March yet, though, is the thing.
Yeah. What you can start with on John Shire, you can just say, like, too much too soon, he might be in over his head.
Yeah. I just needed Duke to go for, like, a little bit of a run.
A lead eight, so he could do something. Yeah.
I really need John Shire. Like John Shire's a really nice guy.
I need him to like hit a small child or something. We can arrange that.
Do something. Something that.
Maybe he needs to sit down. I don't think that's ever going to happen.
No. Maybe if he gets.
What? Hit a small child? Yeah. If he gets.
I like John Shire. On his staff in the offseason.
Yeah. I think he's just.
He's a classic coach. Good guy.
He's a great guy. That's a problem.
He's not going to do anything yet. I don't think that'll ever happen.
I need him. He's not going to be cocky.
He's not going to be. John Shire's putting me in a bad spot right now because I want to hate a guy who's a nice guy and I like.
I need him to do something, so I don't want to feel bad about my hate for Duke. Maybe you should just start to like him.
No. I need him to choke someone.

I was going to say maybe kick Coach K's dog, but that dog's been dead.

He did not take care of that dog.

Remember that puppy?

That puppy was... I don't recall the puppy.

Yeah, the puppy.

Didn't the university gift him a puppy?

Yeah, and he was just like, oh, cool.

And then he was in Hawaii the next day.

Puppy was just sitting there trying to train itself.

You think they gave one of those swears to Miss K? I don't know. Yeah, April 17, 2022.
Miss K, one of the sweaters? Probably. They're hard to get up.
I found out. John Shire gave him the puppy.
Oh. Fuck, man.
He's such a nice guy. No, John Shire gave away his dog.
Yeah. Miss K with those sweaters she'd look good those sweater puppies wearing wearing the sweaters and nothing but the sweaters want to put on the bonk list go ahead tough guy see this is like i i feel like we're in the sopranos right now like i like put put your hands up fight me like a man when when tony beats the fuck out of uh uh jack April april jr in the bathroom yeah put your hands up it's hard it's hard that was right before they killed jackie april yeah put your hands up fight me like a man like let me let me hate you it's hard to get up when you don't even make the sweet 16 like you said it's kind of just you know by by the time thursday rolls around people will have forgotten about duke yeah i already did it's sad it's sad How about Muspuss, Mr.
March, until we get to Sunday? Put Mr. March in waiting.
Yeah, Mr. March, he was awesome.
He's so energetic on the sidelines. And then he took off his shirt after the win.
That was a great game. Great game.
Awesome game. Back and forth, back and forth, switching back and forth.
But after the game, Muspuss goes up to the sidelines, jumps in the crowd, takes his shirt off, and he looks good. Looks real good.
Mus has been doing P90X or something. He might be Keto because that's a bod that won't quit.
Yeah. He looks good.
His coach is great. He's a giant killer.
He's two years in a row he's taken down to one seed. I just wish that after the game he had gone back on the court to scout the next game still shirtless.
Yeah. That would have been sick.
Because he was back out there. Yeah.
Oh, he was back out there within maybe five minutes. Instantly, he's ready to go.
But, yeah, there's not – I mean, he's good for college basketball. Like, he's a fun character, and his teams – like, this is what gets you Mr.
March in waiting. Your teams overperform when they get to March.
Like, Arkansas has had a tough year, a lot of injuries, and now they're here, and they're like, hey, we're two games away from the Final Four. So Titus and I were talking about what the next step in college basketball is going to be, how it's going to become more like the NBA, where maybe some teams are going to start realizing that seeding doesn't matter that much in the NCAA tournament.
It doesn't. Start resting your guys.
The regular season doesn't matter. And for Arkansas, if you've got great coach like Mus as long as you get in and you're not a high seed, anybody can win anything.
No matter what happens once you get in the tournament, you're going to have to play some tough games to win a championship. So you can't really, and you're not going to be able to plan out in advance who you're going to have because there are going to be upsets that happen it's not going to be a straight path right so and it's really the only thing that seating matters is location and they've already kind of screwed that because we saw houston that was a game on saturday houston had to play basically a road game at auburn and houston like it was a weird because we get to saturday purdue's already gone kansas is gone and houston's down 10 at half and you're like is this just the tournament where every one seed just loses because alabama hadn't played yet and uh they were down 10 and a half and then they came out and they were like oh we're just gonna like be a boa constrictor and just strangle the life out of auburn auburn went four for 22 in the second half yeah the second four field goals from houston was it was awesome shout Calvin Sampson.
He put together. He actually adjusted at halftime.
So credit to him. We were having a debate during the game on how much Bruce Pearl weighs.
And you could tell me anywhere between 225 and 280 pounds. What's his height? I think he's 5'11".
If I were to guess, I'd say Bruce Pearl's 5'11". But he's like a stout guy.
He's a stocky guy. He seems like he's dense.
Like he's got big bones. Unofficial 5'11".
And I think that if you... I think he's like 220.
He probably loses 20 pounds a game in sweat. But he looks good.
No, yeah, I'm saying like he's stout. He wears it well.
So if you told me he was 220, I would believe you. If you told me he was 280, I would also believe you.
he probably has like a weirdo trainer and he's in the facility at like 4 30 in the morning doing all kinds of workouts yeah it's like all coaches are like that i also think you probably think he's smaller because he's around basketball players all the time yeah true good point he comes in he towers over us he's actually six five what the fuck yeah it's like me everyone thinks i'm short because i stay next to big cat all the time yeah you're actually six feet yeah um yeah but they squeeze the life out of them it was an insane performance second half uh houston we should talk about princeton the other giant killer they went beat arizona busted jake's bracket jake lost two of his final four teams in the first two days who'd you have three indiana oh you have three that's. Now are you going to say the thing that it's going to make me mad? Yes, I am.
Okay, it's going to trigger me, but go ahead and say it. I have a perfect region.
He has a perfect region. So far.
Your eyes. What? Oh, in the – yeah, no.
Yeah. Wait, is that a region that had a lot of upsets in it? No.
It had just Arkansas. That was the only upset.
Okay. Everything else was shot.
Let me ask something else. Does anyone else in this room have a perfect region? Yeah, I do.
I actually have four perfect regions if you want to look. Okay, Mr.
72 at Shinnecock. Well, I mean, what are you talking about? He's calling Cap.
Jake, call Cap on him. Cap.
Billy, will you look at that real quick and tell me how many regions I have perfect? Four regions. Four regions.
Thank you.

I have the perfect bracket going.

Yeah.

But, Jake, you lost three out of your four final four teams.

Yeah, I understand it's an awful, shitty bracket.

Whoa.

But I have a perfect region.

There's nothing you can say to say that.

Whoa.

Jake.

Whoa.

It's bad.

Language.

I'm going to back off because you seem like you're about to blow.

You dropped the S-bomb on me.

I have a perfect region.

I'd like you to apologize to the listeners at home.

I'm sorry.

I agree. I'm going to back off because you seem like you're about to blow.
You dropped the S-bomb on me. I have a perfect region.
I'd like you to apologize to the listeners at home. I'm sorry.
Whoa. Do you consider yourself a man of faith? Yes.
He drives to left. He's got a perfect region.
Princeton is absolutely killing offensive rebounds. That's the key.
They're getting second-chance shots. I think they have 29 offensive rebounds through two games.
And they were, Mizzou was supposed to have just an insane advantage in terms of athleticism and the pace and everything, and it wasn't even a game. They kicked the shit out of them.
I want to read to you a paragraph that's so perfect because whenever we have an Ivy League school go deep in the tournament, it's like obviously everyone in the media went to an ivy league school so they just love talking about the ivy league school uh this is from the new york times the first paragraph about about uh princeton blake peters a sophomore guard for princeton plays spanish classical guitar speaks fluent mandarin and it turns out is as tough as nails when his tigers have a chance to advance the round of 60. You know what that guy sounds like? He sounds like in a romantic comedy, the lovable main character breaks up with his girlfriend.
And then she starts dating this guy. Yeah, he played basketball at Princeton.
He plays flamenco guitar. Yeah, exactly.
And he's a traitor on Wall Street also. Yeah, exactly.
He's rich as fuck. By the way, Jamie Dixon.
But he can't, you know what? He can't make her laugh. Yeah, yeah.
That's exactly it. Princeton, all the nerds, very nice to root for Princeton.
Jamie Dixon just told TCU to stop fouling and they decided to foul and the spread was foreign, so I'm going to lose. That was not fun.
He literally said stop fouling and they kept fouling. That's tough.
I took TCU money lines and that ship had sailed. That was an unfortunate ending to a great game.
Gonzaga goes to a Sweet 16, probably the deepest they've ever been. For the first time ever.
Yeah. That was such bullshit that they just said, stop fouling.
Give me a prayer. Give me a prayer three.
He's going to shoot it? He's going to shoot it. He's going to shoot it.
Oh! Yes! Oh, my God.

Wait.

Oh, double check.

I took them.

Oh, my God. That was unreal.

That was it.

I hope everyone's watching.

Are they going to review that?

I hope everyone's watching.

I think he got it off.

The YouTube.

What a way to end that game.

What a way to end the weekend.

Nothing better than ending with a win.

Holy shit.

That was awesome. That was crazy.
TG was plus four. They didn't pressure him at all.
And he just dribbled the ball up or let the ball roll all the way up. Hank, you just missed an all-time moment.
Did you have it? I had a money line. Oh, fuck.
Congrats, Big Cup. Thank you.
It's good to win one like that. Heading into the Sweet 16 with momentum.
I haven't won one like that all tournament, it feels like, except FAU. They got completely the luckiest win of my life.
God damn it. And Memphis just got absolutely screwed.
You guys both had Moneyline? Yeah, and I had Memphis, too. Oh, fuck.
And you had Purdue. I did have Purdue.
I deserve all the bad things. I just remember looking over to you during the Purdue game, and you were seething with rage.
I might have made one of the biggest mistakes of my life, gambling-wise, with the exception of the doink, by betting on all the one seeds and the two seeds. I think next year I'm going to take every one and two seed money line, or every 15 and 16 seed money line, and just try to turn this around because that was a miserable experience.
Never root for Goliath. I want to get back to Princeton real quick, but I want to tweet out this clip because that was an all-time cover.
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Hank, were you using the restroom?

Yeah.

You had to go poop?

No, I don't know if it was the dinner we got, but I just got a weird hot flash stomach thing.

Did you poop?

No.

What'd you do?

I puked a little bit.

What?

You just puked? He looks a little green.

Yeah, I just got super sweaty and then I to, like. You're the puke guy.
I mean, I don't know. What do you want me to say? I think you pooped.
I would admit it if I pooped. I have no problem pooping.
You missed Jake dropped a shit on us. Whoa.
He got very triggered because he has a perfect region, this region right here, that literally the only upset was Arkansas over Kansas. So he's lost three out of four Final Four teams, but he keeps saying, well, I have a perfect region.
Yeah, that means nothing. Right.
But he keeps saying, well, does anyone else have a perfect region? That's not even a one-year bracket. No.
No. And then he tried to show us that he was in, like, 10th place.
It's like, but you don't have any points left. But that's like Charles Barkley.

His bracket is completely messed up right now.

And I think he has that same perfect region.

Yeah.

Yeah, exactly.

Yeah, that's what I said to Jake.

That's the you don't know ball.

I was like, yeah, Charles Barkley's entire, it was very funny. Every time they showed him, he just had to keep on X-ing out every single spot in his bracket except for that region.

That region has to have the most points.

Yep.

If you picked one upset, you got the perfect region.

Arkansas over Kansas.

Okay, back to Princeton real quick.

This guy, Mitch Henderson, their coach, he's so Princeton

because he went to Princeton.

He was on the team to beat UCLA.

And, like, I think you and I, PFT, share the same memories of like we think princeton backdoor cut yep that one game against ucla unfortunately this is just a sign to never like go back into the past and look up old things what was the score of that ucla princeton game i have no idea okay because i remember it as of, like, because it was UCLA won the tournament the year before.

Tyus Edney, Coast to Coast, all-time moment.

I can't remember what round that was in.

They lose to Princeton the next year, also all-time moment.

And I was thinking, like, I remember that game so vividly.

It was such a great game.

Yeah.

Final score was 43-41.

Oh, that's sick.

I was like, damn it.

That was one of my favorite tournament games, 43-41? Because we just remember the backdoor cut. The backdoor cut was so revolutionary back in 1996.
It was awesome. Because no coach had thought to have their player just straight up run at the basket and then receive a pass.
Yeah. It broke basketball.
But you know what? I distinctly remember how Princeton would run that play too, because they would tell their guards, just dribble the ball with one hand and don't pick it up with two hands before passing it. Throw it with one hand off the dribble.
Yeah. And everybody was like, what the, what is this razzle dazzle? And I remember they were just, they were showing it over and over the replays.
Like, look at what Princeton's doing. They're fucking them up with the backdoor cut.
And, again, like, if you asked me for, like, iconic moments in my head for the tournament, like, as a kid, that was one of them. 43-41.
Well, brutal. We probably would have had the over in that game.
Yeah. And also, I watched, they had, like, a full-game broadcast that I just peeped at.
And I forgot that, like like you would just watch stretches of basketball games without

the score on the on the tv screen yeah you had to rely on the announcers to update you do you also remember having to call a number after games were over like in the middle of the night to try to get what the scores were yeah oh yeah you'd have to call the sports machine yeah you'd have to call the score number yeah because they wouldn't print it in the paper then you'd have to wait for 10 15 minutes as they read every single score for every single game until he got to yours world that was that that was that segment but yeah that was 43 41 but yeah princeton is like i don't they might just be good like you know f fdu they were good but also they got they met fau and lost and it was like oh shit that that's probably what to expect. Princeton might just be good the way they beat Arizona, and then they just fucking killed Missouri.
Like, killed them. Yeah, if you can bang with the big boys and box them out and get offensive rebounds, you can beat anybody.
Yeah, and now they play Creighton, which will be, I don't know, two mid-majors battling it out. I mean, I think if you can beat a power five school like Mizzou, Princeton should be able to wipe out a mid-major like Creighton.
Yes, absolutely. Absolutely.
Okay. Should we go to Alabama killed Maryland? Sorry, Scott Van Pelt.
Although Scott Van Pelt had a great weekend with Edwin Diaz's injury. So, a guy can't have it all.
Three of his logos were spinning. Yeah, you can't have it all.
UCLA is still alive, Max, even though every time UCLA plays, an injury happens. He literally said he's fine.
He said that he's fine, which sounds exactly like what Max would say if you were to just ask Max in the post-game interview, Max, how do you think he is? Fine. He's fine.
He's fine. It's fine.
He lost one Super Bowl. It's fine.
If he just repeats that he's fine enough, he'll be fine. So I'm going to put on my, what do doctors wear? Stethoscopes? Yeah.
I'm going to put on my PMT stethoscope and say that his ankle is very, very swollen. Yeah.
And his ankle is very, very badly sprained. Yeah.
So he probably won't be fine at game time. Yeah.
He might be like half fine. Yeah.
You didn't hear what he said. What did he say? He said that he's fine.
Okay. He's fine.
He's fine. He's totally fine.
We should also mention. I'm just glad that Northwestern lost.
Yeah. Northwestern lost.
Darren Revelle did the fucking Tyson tattoo. And like, what Just bum me out.
Whenever I see his tweets, honestly, you ever listen to him talk? I wish he would bite my ear off. Yeah.
He's just bums me out. Bums me out.
The, yeah. Northwestern loss.
UCLA is marching on. We should say, because another great wrinkle of the tournament, you know, those memes, like guys will sit around and just name baseball players for hours? Yeah, Jeff Blouser.
Yeah, this happens with the tournament where we just get names and we keep them forever. And Andrew Funk is forever in our lore.
He's going to be a name for sure. He had one game where he went 8 for 10.
He unfortunately didn't shoot as well on Saturday night, but God damn it, do I love that kid.

He might be like 25.

I think he's 25.

It was a very confusing game plan that they had him running against Texas where he would just stand on the perimeter,

and they were guarding him almost like a box-in-one

where even when the lane was getting collapsed,

their guy would stay out on him to make sure he didn't get an outlet pass.

Turns out that's Funk's game for the most part,

is catch and shoot on the perimeter. So they kind of neutralized that.
Texas is just way more athletic than Penn State is. Texas is very, very good.
Texas is going to go up against Xavier in the Midwest, which has the 1, 2, 3, and 5 still left. It's funny to me how all these new heads to basketball, the casuals drop in in the NCAA tournament, and they're like, whoa, Texas coach looks a lot like Gus Fring from Breaking Bad.
And I'm like, I knew that a month ago, man. Come on.
Get with the program. Chris Beard.
Yeah. Yeah, that's the coach.
But, yeah, Andrew Funk, we love you. We love you.
Yeah. Like, we did have some Andrew Funk moments.

Thursday was fantastic.

Saturday could have been an all-time moment if he hit that last shot.

Were you saying about him or somebody else that Funk is definitely going to be a dozen trivia questions?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, went to Penn State.

Yeah.

Had that one game.

He had an iconic moment.

Yeah, this Penn State player went eight for ten from three in the first round.

And you'll be like, ah, fuck. Oh, that's close.
Who is this? Oh, and then Jeff will be like, nope, sorry, that's not it. And he'll be like, no, actually, well, no, if it's your team, he'll give you credit for that.
If it's Frank's team, he won't. He won't, yeah.
He'll be like, sorry, that wasn't close enough. But if it was your team, he'll be like, fuck, yeah, no, you said funk.
Okay, let's do Sunday games. It's brought to you by our friends at Peloton.
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You get the live leaderboard. You're competing against people.
I already knew I was kicking Dave's ass on the treadmill, but I saw the lineup of names. I was like, you know what? I can do this full ride.
Yeah. So you've been doing the Peloton.
Hank, you've been doing the Peloton? Yeah, I'm going to get back on my grind. I got to get back in the buns of anarchy, though.
Yeah. Maybe this week.
Wait, who's your favorite teacher again? Kendall Tool. Yeah.
Who's your second? Third. Third favorite.
I pretty much just vary between those two. Okay.
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March? We probably should. I have a question for you, BK.
People are asking for an apology. I think Tom Izzo is underrated.
I think he's underrated as a head coach. For a while, he got so overrated that now he became underrated as a head coach.
Mr. March himself, he seems to to do this every single year and you know for the record when i said tom iso might be overrated i was saying to squat on that take yeah so i didn't believe it when i said it yeah i'm just declaring that i'm gonna be the first yeah i'm gonna be the first person yeah to say it so when the discussion eventually happens i was there before all you guys yes i'm gonna have to wait another probably five or six years for that to come true i i deserve a little criticism too because i owe stanford steve sixteen hundred dollars if they go to the final four because i did make that bet with him but tom iso delivered again he's been to the tournament 25 straight years this is his 15th sweet 16 he also broke the record today 16 times he has won as an under-seeded team, which is pretty crazy to think about that.
He just breaks every bracket. Maybe he's Mr.
Bracket Breaker. He might be.
That's really what it is. I saw Izzo smiling during a game today and just completely animated with positive energy.
You know what I love about Izzo is even when he's screaming at his players, and you can ask most of his former players, and they'll be like, yeah, he coaches us hard, but that's kind of a test for us. If you can handle being coached by him, it makes you better.
So he'll break his players down during games. He gets mad.
He holds people accountable. And then right after the game's over, he snaps the second Jamie Erdahl starts interviewing him, and he just turns into turns into like a grandpa cracking jokes with her immediately.
Yes. Completely changes.
But yeah, this is Tom Izzo being Tom Izzo. Why are we surprised anymore when Tom Izzo does this in March? He has more sweet 16s than all but 17 programs.
So 17 programs in NCAA basketball. He has more than everyone else.
And then he has more Sweet 16s than 10 of the 12 teams in the Big Ten. So Indiana and Michigan are the only programs that have more Sweet 16s than Tom Izzo as a person.
It's pretty crazy. I do think we probably underrate him.
I know that he has to get that second title to get into that rarefied air because second title is really where, you know what I mean? You look at the list of guys who won one title there's a lot of guys, then you get to second and it's a laundry list of the best coaches in the game, not saying he's not one of them but second would make his resume unassailed. The real question becomes better or worse coach than calipari

well so calipari he's got certainly he has more than one title he only has one we were we were talking this is going to suck for kentucky fans because they not only lost to k-state today but uh we got into the conversation that if calipari had won that 2015 title where wisconsin and beat him in the Final Four and he had done it as an undefeated team,

he would be, like, untouchable in his... if Cal Papari had won that 2015 title where Wisconsin beat him in the final 40,

done it as an undefeated team, he would be like untouchable in his entire resume.

Yeah.

He would undefeated team.

He would be national titles all time.

Great.

Yeah.

All time.

Great. But it's funny you bring him up because I just was,

I was like curious because I think what Tom Izzo does better than any other

coach, he, he, it's the quick turnaround.

So I think it was only four times in the tournament has he only won exactly one game. He basically either gets bounced right away or he gets the Sweet 16.
There's kind of no middle ground. He's so good at the turnaround coaching.
And he also just coaches teams that maybe don't have the top-end talent that everyone else has, the Blue Bloods have. I looked it up.
Michigan State, in Tom Izzo's time, has four lottery picks. So Jaron Jackson, Miles Bridges, Denzel Valentine, shout out to Bulls for that pick, and Jason Richardson.
In that same time, Duke has 25 lottery picks. Cal at Kentucky, which is only going back to 2009, so this is a 1995 count.
So it's like double the years. Is a Cal has 22 Kansas with bill self since 2003 has 13 and UNC with Roy since 2003 has 12.
So it's pretty crazy how many of these schools have this top end elite NBA talent. And Tom Izzo doesn't have that and he's just putting together a resume every single March yeah 24 and 7 on games with one day rest yeah per ESPN Mike Greenberg that's coaching it's coaching he's a great coach yeah no one ever said that he was a bad coach I've no I've never said that Tom Izzo was a bad coach never said I just said that someday somebody will say that he's overrated, and I just wanted to beat that person to the punch.
Yeah. Okay, so Mr.
March advances. Kentucky loses.
That was tough. Sean Miller and Xavier back to the Sweet 16.
I was looking it up. Archie Miller really doesn't get enough credit for being like the dumb done brother because his resume versus brother's socks.
It sucks for him. So Sean Miller, he's going to get another job soon, right? Like he's going to.
I don't know. Do you think he's going to stay at Xavier? Because that's where he started.
You know what I mean? Like he went Xavier and then he went obviously to Arizona. And maybe it's one of those things where it's like, hey, I got a good gig here playing a power conference.
He probably is psyched to not be out in that Arizona heat all the time sweating. Yes, sweating his balls off.
I don't know. That might be one of those situations where he's like, this is home.
I'm good. Like, you know, because the expectations are clearly different at Xavier and he exceeds them every time.
Yep. People are going to get mad.
I keep saying Xavier. Xavier.
Yeah. Xavier.
Xavier. But yeah, he was at Xavier from early 2000s, went to Arizona for a long time, obviously didn't end great, and now he's back.
Xavier, why not just be there? Those Xavier teams from the early 2000s were fun to watch. Yeah.
They're good basketball teams. So they played against Pittsburgh today who wore their black jerseys again, their first loss.
Where Sean Miller played. Wearing the black jerseys.
Yep. And it's so funny when they put them on because they're just trying to look like the basketball version of the Steelers.
Yep. Which I love.
It's like, we'll break these out when we – we'll play Renegade. Yeah.
And then that way people from Pittsburgh will pay – that's really, if you want to get – if you want to do numbers in Pittsburgh, just have black and yellow be your team colors for any sport. And now you're the basketball Steelers.
It's the greatest thing any city's ever done. I've said it before, but like when the Pirates suck or the Penguins suck, the fans of Pittsburgh can sit there like in the middle of July and just look out on the field and be like, Steelers.
Steelers come. Like I'm smell that thinking about the stillers they're probably that's all you can do like it's it's a genius genius thing they've done they're probably pumped to have the pirates suck to a certain extent because it's just like well you know what we don't have to we don't have to waste our time and mental energy focusing on a sport and a team that's not the yeah it's like the homer simpson like bart girl bart yeah the the pittsburgh just has like Baseball stillers, hockey stillers, basketball stillers.
It's good.

They're all Steelers. Yeah.
Or was it Stav that was saying like, that's white Lamar. Yeah, right.
That's short Lamar. Yeah, that's how you could just look at it.
It's like, yeah, Steelers. It's everything you see in Pittsburgh, which is smart because that's the team.
But yeah. Their bridges are Steelers.
Yeah. Everything.
They're like Steelers. i'm convinced that they painted the bridges after they had the football team i mean the majority of people in pittsburgh just drive around all the time just in their brain they're just like stealers stealers stealers stealers all the time which that's a great life to have yeah honestly respect yeah i wish i could do that so much respect uh all right the uh yukon yukon looks good danny hurley versus muss in the second round's gonna oh hank's puke again.
Oh, Hank, are you going to... Oh, no, he looks ghostly.
He looks so white. He's good.
He might do number three. He just hobbled off.
Pooke and puke at the same time. He might take a screenshot.
Do you think this is soft by Hank, Max? I just hope he doesn't have a stomach bug and gets us sick. Oh, jeez.
I don't believe in stomach bugs. I'm stronger than that.
I'm stronger than that. I'm way stronger than that.
Stomach bugs are so bad. Yeah, but you can't catch a stomach bug from somebody unless you eat their puke.
I feel like that's the easiest thing to catch from somebody. No.
PFT's right. I've gotten three stomach bugs in my life.
It's all because I ate someone else's puke. Yep.
Like a dog. I mistook it for my own.
One time I had a lick of poop, but that was it.

That was fine.

I've never.

That was diarrhea.

I can't remember the last time I caught a stomach bug.

I'll get a cold. This is such a bad segment.

No, no, no.

Listen, I'll catch a cold.

We're not going to have a show on Wednesday.

I'll catch a cold.

I'll catch a cough.

I'll get a fever sometimes.

I don't remember the last time.

A little herpy.

I started puking.

Here and there. I think I'm clean on that, actually.
Yeah one yeah somehow happens yeah hank god damn uh yeah danny hurley versus must is gonna be awesome i yukon yukon looks awesome second half yukon yukon sleeper national title team right now i they're one of them i have i have three futures in the Sweet 16. My mystery team has been eliminated.
People did figure it out.

It was Kentucky because remember I promised Harvey when we were on Kentucky Sports Radio. If Kentucky won, I'd split it with him.
Harvey, if you're listening to this, you would have had $100,000 because I got him at 55-1, so that sucks for you. But yeah, UConn looks good.
trying the creighton looks good there was a lot of good games and then we had fdu fall short they fucking fought so goddamn hard it was i love those kids i love those we should talk a little bit about kansas state yeah no kansas state yeah no they kW. Yeah, no, Kansas State's purple.
The lavender pops. It's beautiful.
It's a thing of beauty, and they have my favorite player of the tournament. Yes.
In Mikel Noel. He just bombs.
That kid is awesome. That kid is so much fun to watch.
Not only does he bomb, he crosses people up. He's maybe the best passer in the tournament also.
He's throwing, like, behind his head alley-oops to people on a dime. This kid is insane to watch.

I fucking love watching him play.

I hope they keep winning because, again, that's another short king.

The short kings, they are the market inefficiency right now.

And Kansas State, as an institution,

they should just market entirely to short kings.

Yes.

Because what's his name?

Deuce Vaughn?

Yep.

They're running back 5'5".

Yep.

And then Darren Sproles. He's probably 5'5", 5'6".
They're the official. That's just older Deuce Vaugh yep they're running back five five yep and then darren sproles he's probably five five five six they're the official older juice fawn yeah older deuce fawn they're the official college of short people yes respect or actually technically perfectly average because yeah i think he's five foot nine i think uh noel is five nine right yeah that was but it was it was a very tight game oscar sheba had i think 18 rebounds it was Everyone knew going into that game, Kansas State can't do anything about his rebounding, and they just couldn't all game.
I'm going to miss him in college basketball. Yeah, we might have one more year.
I'll let you know when I go to Keeneland and I see him at Jeff Rubies. I'm like, oh, you're back again? He's like, it's actually my third year.
But yeah, Noel, that game was so tight. And then at the end of the game, he's just like i'm gonna win this game and i'm just gonna start bombing and in a tournament that has been the worst shooting tournament ever it was something it's basically shifted how our eyes work where if if a player hits a like perfect three swish it's like the most it like brought tears to my eyes yeah when he started hitting it was like i've never seen go in before.
Yeah, and also shout out Willie the Wildcat, Kansas State's mascot. A lot of people saw him and they're like, whoa, what happened to the rest of his body? No, that's what Willie does.
In football season, he wears pads because that's what the players wear. And then in basketball season, he just wears a jersey and he's got his human arms and human legs sticking out to the side.
So I went on a deep dive and started watching a bunch of Willie the Wildcat videos from football season. Before every game, they used to dress one of their drill team guys or dance team guys up as the mascot from the opponent's team, and then Willie would just lay him out, jack him up, hit stick style at midfield, and they had to stop doing it because he gave a kid a seizure

because he hit him so hard.

Fuck yes.

But that's Willie, baby.

Shout out Willie.

Also, Kansas State's got a little touch of Team of Destiny

because they have Keontae Johnson,

remember who collapsed for Florida last year?

Yep.

And it was a very scary situation.

He's now on Kansas State.

Maybe a little, like, that will be a story that people write about if they make it to the Final Four. that last year or two years ago it might have been two years ago but yeah it was bad yeah I think it was 2020 that was a very scary situation but yeah he is on Kansas State and he's a very good player and they might have that team of destiny who knows I'm rooting for him who knows I'm rooting for Keontae too uh okay so let's see wait was it no it was last year i think because he only played one game last year all covid years all blend together we don't really understand how time happened the last yeah three years oh no it was uh no it was 2020 yeah two years ago that's two years two seasons years ago yeah two seasons ago damn time doesn't so wait this might be fucks me up this might be a clone Keontae Johnson yeah Billy it was actually before the vaccine even existed oh so you can't blame it on the vaccine or maybe they maybe it was an experimental vaccine they gave him okay oh Hank's back oh you do look he's looking so white you look weird you look so weird yeah i don't know i think did you puke again yeah the rice did you save any that we could eat uh i mean that's some of the trash okay you puked in the trash you couldn't make it to the bathroom no oh my god yeah i just got like hot hot sweats hot flashes you look like you got jaundice going on right now.
I feel good. There is something about like when you just puking it.
You feel good? It feels better. Well, no, I was feeling weird.
And then I just got like, I don't know. I'm sweating now.
What'd you eat? I had a burrito with spicy rice. Oh, no.
Wait, the rice was spicy or the sauce? Yeah, the rice was spicy. And the burrito was spicy.
I don't know. I mean, I don't know what type of rice it was.
Hank, does it have anything to do with the fact that the Celtics are in third place now? Yeah, that's a mathematical anomaly. That is an interesting thing for you to bring up.
I'd like you to talk about it more. Hank, those are two words I never thought I'd hear you say on part of my tape.
A mathematical anomaly? Okay, go on. First of all, can you explain to me what a mathematical anomaly is it's just something that doesn't make sense the numbers don't add up you know okay x plus y doesn't equal z for some reason okay uh but the celtics wait wait those are letters you just said yeah i know you know math math seven seven okay yeah exactly uh they have a better record than they have the tiebreaker so the third place thing doesn't make a of sense.
The Celtics have a better record than the Sixers? What do you mean better record? But then why are they above them in the standings? They have one more loss than the Sixers. Oh, that's not a better record.
Their win percentage is lower than the Sixers. Yeah, so if you have one more loss, that's not a better record.
Yeah, but... Because if the Sixers win all the rest of their games...
Yeah, true. The Sixers are the two-seed.
They control their own destiny. I know I'm not a better record.
Yeah, but the Sixers win all the rest of their games.

Yeah, the Sixers are the two seed.

Yeah, control their own destiny.

I know I'm not a world-renowned educated person, but maybe maybe Billy,

you could tell me which of these two numbers is higher.

686 or 681.

686 is higher.

Okay, mystery team.

That was the Sixers.

I have one Billy.

Okay, okay. I'm going to stat off.
Which one's higher, 49 or 48? 49 is higher. Okay, I'm going to counter that with another mystery stat.
Which one is higher, 22 or 23? 23. So that was the Celtics' losses.
That means that they are basically even. The loss column is how you go at all.
But the Celtics have the tiebreaker. Well, you guys have a win streak, right? You guys have won eight in a row? No, because that's the thing.
What you're saying, if both teams... Oh, no, there's a six.
You have literally no color in your face right now. I'm struggling.
I'm fighting through adversity right now. You're doing translucent face.
What I'm saying, though... You look like a ghost.
Let me see how, yeah. You look like a ghost.
That's a rough one. You look like a man who's never been on vacation.
I don't know if you guys were cutting to me earlier, but I was like internally just like, what is going on? Well, you hobbled off to go puke. Yeah, it was bad.
What you're saying doesn't make sense though because if the Celtics win the rest of their games and the Sixers win the rest of their games, the Celtics have the tiebreaker. No, no, no.
You don't understand. Because the Sixers will have more wins.
Yeah, because the Celtics right now have played more. Yeah, they will.
Yes, because Hank, fact or fiction, I'll put it in terms you can understand. Fact or fiction, if the Sixers win the rest of their games, that means that they would have no more losses, right? Right.
In the season? 22 losses. Okay, so fact or fiction, if the Celtics win the rest of their games, they will also have no more losses.
That would mean, that's a fact, that would mean that the Celtics would have one more loss on the season than the Sixers would. You go off the loss column, not the win column.
All right, fine. Max, any response to that? No, I mean, NBA or Bill Simmons said that the Sixers are looking forward to seeing the Celtics in the playoffs, which definitely won't come back to bite them.
Oh, no. But I think that Simmons just making up false reports.
I don't think he would do that. Celtics are going through it, though.
They're not playing well. Jason Tatum's specifically not playing well.
It's just tough, you know, coaching change, trying to live up to championship. You've had the same coach all year.
No, I know, but I'm saying, you know, obviously you compared this season to last season. The last season they made a championship run.
It's just, you know, higher standards. And now Brad Stevens might be going to Purdue.
I don't think that's happening. Things are falling apart.
Rico Bosco did report that's the first call they have to make. I think, yeah.
I mean, you call Brad Stevens all the time. Everyone should.
Everyone should. Everyone should call Brad Stevens.
If you have, like, an opening in middle school basketball, Brad Stevens should be your first call. Make him say no to you.
Imagine if you got a call for every coach opening ever. He should.
Brad Stevens. All right, other games from Sunday.
sunday uh yeah fdu they tried really hard that was an exciting they fought to the end because that like you can lose when you lose like st peter's loss to unc last year you're like all right the cinderella run had to end after you lost fighting to the very end and they almost they were winning that game with like four minutes left. They went out like champs.
They missed a lot of open shots. They missed some open threes they probably wished they had back.
They missed some layups they wished that they had back. We should credit FAU.
John L. Davis had 25 points, 10 rebounds, 5 assists, 5 steals.
First time in NCAA tournament that anybody's ever had that stat line. That's pretty cool.
So pretty good game for him. And FAU, I've said at least once on this show, if I had to do college all over again, knowing what I know now, I think I would go to FAU.
FAU. Because of the campus, where it's at.
You're in Boca Raton. Your perspective changes a little bit, and you realize what would be the most fun college

experience it would either be go to a big state school that has massive football and basketball programs or just go live in boca for four years and have the time of your life yeah and dusty may is just a great name made up name totally totally his that's a stripper name sounds like a wrestler there's no way there's no way but stripper wrestler yeah there's no way that's his real name yeah or uh an old like grandma porn star yeah dusty may but it's ma e yeah we're through we're now combining yeah every basically every name dusty roads and then yeah he's he's a stripper porn star old person yep fake name though miami shout out miami coach l gets them to the sweet 16 indiana really had a moment here where they could have just taken like they they beat Purdue twice this year Purdue loses a 16 seed if Indiana had gotten to the sweet 16 and they could have talked for an entire week about how they went to the sweet 16 as a four seed and Purdue lost in the first round as a one seed that would have been nice for them yeah it's uh Indiana still they like to think that they're back or on the precipice of being back all the time yeah and if they'd gone to a sweet 16 then you can make the case Indiana basketball's back they are they're the only blue blood team that I think doesn't have the color blue yeah in their scheme right going through the list in my head I think that they are yeah UNC Duke UCLA Michigan State no I don't think they are

they're not a blue blood

they're not a blue blood

they're not the blue blood mantle away from indiana yeah if they have a perfect seat next coach have a perfect season they inherit indiana's blue bloodness i also hope trace jackson davis i don't think he has he might have a year left. I think to have a perfect season, they inherit Indiana's blue-bloodness.
I also hope Trace Jackson Davis, I don't think he has –

he might have a year left.

I think he has a year left.

He's like 23, but I hope he stays because that's a fun –

he's a fun college basketball player.

Yeah.

There was one player on Memphis who's 26 years old.

Yeah, that's illegal.

He's older than Joe Burrow is.

That's illegal.

And he had four fouls with 13 minutes left in the game, or it was more than that. Penny Hardaway put him back in with 13 minutes left in the game.
All-time ballsy move by Penny. I was upset that Memphis lost.
They're a fun team to watch. Yeah.
And then Gonzaga ended the night with a comeback win against TCU. Gonzaga still got it.
Drew Timmy for he has another year which is crazy yeah he does actually have another year and he said he's not coming back but he could transfer he could transfer if i i don't understand why players like if you have another year and you're really good and you're in a smaller school why wouldn't you just transfer to like unc or something i think true that'd be amazing if Drew Timmy transferred to a big state school. Right.
If I were all the connections there, or go to Notre Dame, alumni will take care of you for the rest of your life. That's what they always say.
Yeah, I'd transfer. It's an 80-year degree.
I would transfer to FAU. Yeah.
And just hang out on the beach. And just get to the tournament there.
Or Hawaii. Toledo.
Why don't more players just go to college in Hawaii? That's a good question. Low-key heard it sucks.
I actually had this conversation over the week. Is the state or the university? No, like the university.
Oh, because the state is awesome. Yeah.
It's great. But heard the university sucks.
What about it? If you're like not from Hawaii, they don't fuck with you. Ah, got it.
But if you're really sick at sports, they probably do fuck with you. That's kind of the equalizer in life.
I mean, Colt Brennan seemed enjoy hawaii so much that he got the state of hawaii like died into the side of his head isn't he hawaiian uh no i don't think he was no i think he's also passed away so yeah yeah r.i.p thoughts and prayers jake will probably use his thoughts and prayers for someone who stubbed their toe yeah oh he's from california yeah yeah that's hawaii adjacent but if you're good at sports it equalizes everything at life true everyone likes the dude who's good at sports yeah so drew timmy go to hawaii why not i would yeah just have an awesome time maybe get some nil shit can you transfer mid-season i don't think so i don't think you can play you can you can you can like yeah Okay, so I would go to FAU. No, I would go to Hawaii.
Wait. I go to FAU, play there, and then transfer to Hawaii for, like, the last two months of my collegiate career.
Yeah, I like that. Just get my degree there.
So we have our Sweet 16. Awesome games.
I'm very excited for. This is the worst four days in the three and a half days in the sports calendar because you wake up on monday and you're like what's life without being able to watch basketball all day oh i'm sad that jake's not here right now because i have something pretty wild oh yeah i got i got a wild stat coming up give it to tennessee fau they're playing thursday at the mecca at msg yep the two athletic directors of these two schools, they're brothers.
What? How wild is that? That is wild. They're white brothers, which when I first saw that written out, I was a little bit confused as to what that meant.
Like, is this a Rachel? Is their last name White? Is it a Dolezal situation? Yeah. Yeah, they're Danny and Brian White.
Yeah. Athletic directors.
Wow. That's wild.
They got to have a bet. Their mom has to be like wearing the double, like a suit breast with two different colors on it.
Yes, yes. Like the Kelsey.
Yeah, fuck. They should send each other a transfer.
Yeah. Oh, I like that.
Or no, the winner gets the best player. Yeah.
Oh, dude, F8. Yeah.
That'd be sick. We already know he can throw an orange 106 yards.

Yeah.

If Tennessee loses, FAU gets Joe Milton.

If Tennessee wins, Tennessee gets Lane Kiffin's recruiting tactics

that he probably left behind.

His book.

Wait, they both had Lane Kiffin experiences.

Yeah, that's true, but the updated one. Okay, the good one yeah good one the one that's that's that's getting ole miss going got it uh okay uh last thing for the tournament the roback question r-h-o-b-a-c-k.com use code take for 20 off your first purchase i'm wearing the joggers right now i've worn them all weekend they are the absolute best q-zips polos hoodies everything at roback.com last question billy we weren't worn them all weekend.
They are the absolute best. Q-zips, polos, hoodies, everything at Roback.com.
Last question. Billy, we weren't with you all weekend.
What did you think about the tournament? It was a hell of a time to bet major underdogs. Yeah.
Because they all fucking hit. And, like, it was wild.
I mean. This is assault on PFD.
I know. Like, I bet against Purdue just, like, as a joke.
And it hit. That's a bit? It was a bit? It was like plus $1,200.
Yeah, I bet. Yeah.
I bet on Purdue as a bit. Yeah.
And you bet against them as a bit. I mean, I paid my whole bar tab off of a $10 bet.
It was insane. Oh, really? Sick.
You bought a round for the boys? Round for the boys. Okay.
What else? How much was your bar tab? Like $100. That's like when your doctor asks you how much you drink yeah you have to do a second to do the lie math yeah how was how was st patrick's day it was sick yeah and the games were awesome watching it in the bars like all the like so many great games yeah like everyone's going nuts what'd you do on st patrick's day uh drank yeah yeah hell yeah that rules are you still wearing your st pat is that the shirt I did you do on St.
Patrick's Day? Drank. Yeah.
Yeah. Hell yeah.
That rules. Are you still wearing your St.
Patrick's Day? Is that the shirt that you wore? I literally came straight from St. Patrick's Day here.
It's Friday. It was St.
Patrick's Day. Yeah, but it's a whole weekend.
It's March 20th. I came straight from the parade to here.
You came straight from St. Patrick's Day.
I literally went. Weren't there celebrations here last weekend, too? Yeah.
No, I went to South Station. Then I went to Penn Station.
Now I'm here. Oh, you're in Boston.
Oh, you were there today in Boston. Yeah.
So you literally did just come straight from St. Patrick's Day.
I just came straight from St. Patrick's Day.
How many days was your St. Patrick's Day this weekend? Three.
That's normal. That's toned down.
That was better than last year. Did you have any fights that you witnessed that you didn't get in? Nope.
Nope. Okay.
Good. didn't witness any crimes this weekend nice that's that's a plus that's a lie commit any it's a lie that you didn't witness any because i could just imagine i witnessed several crimes yeah also i just imagine billy being like i didn't witness any crimes he just robbed someone with his eyes closed it's like i didn't witness it didn't happen all right so what else from the tournament Princeton going on a run was awesome.
Yeah, you respect them because of the education thing. Yeah, they're smart.
Like that whole FAU part, you were just sitting there like, then you'd have a degree from FAU. Gross.
You'd chill by the beach and be chill. Yeah.
But then you'd have a degree from FAU. I mean, that's pretty good.
What's the degree at FAU? I think it's fine. It doesn't matter.
I'm going to let anybody in on a secret. It honestly doesn't matter.
None of it matters. And pretty soon it's not going to matter whether or not you even went to college.
Correct. Yeah, college is kind of.
Whoa, is this a change, Billy? No, I mean, honestly, thinking back on it, I probably need to go to college. Yeah.
The only thing college is good for. You could have been radicalized as an 18-year-old.
Going to college is good. It's good to just get out of your house for a while.
And it's like a halfway home to becoming an adult. I mean, I guess it's, yeah.
Billy is like the Goodwill hunting where he's like, someday you'll wake up and you learn. You could have learned all that from a TikTok.
tick tock yeah exactly that's where i got my degree all right what else it was dope that was it all right that's we put a quote card for billy there and simply tournament recap it was dope i mean just like it was like such a great time for parlays just like chalky ass parlays yeah wait no not chalky ass parlays you just you started this whole thing out by saying that you bet all the underdogs. Well, I bet all the underdogs, and then I just put parlays together with just all the easy picks.
Oh. Except Purdue.
Sounds like you kind of broke Vegas. It was like the mid picks.
It was really fun. I haven't actually gotten into gambling on March Madness until this year really hard, and it was awesome.
What's your system? Because it sounds like you picked all the underdogs,

but then you also parlayed all the overdogs that won.

Exactly.

Yeah, you're a genius.

So at some point, for example, I had Purdue in a parlay,

but I also had, and it just all worked out.

Yeah.

Oh, you bet both sides.

Exactly.

He broke Vegas.

I always beat Vegas.

Yeah.

We figured this out last year.

If you bet both sides, you can't lose. Yep.
That's a fact. You cash tickets either way.
Actually, that would be a sound investment strategy to just bet both sides of every single game and then end up losing what? You'd probably miss out on what? 10%? Yeah. You'd lose 10% every bet.
Listen, I've hit the all button at the racetrack before. Sometimes you've got to see one go through the hoop.
No, but if you put $10 on Furman and then $10 on a parlay that includes Purdue. Virginia, yeah.
One's going to hit. You broke Vegas.
You're bringing down the house. The Billy football store.
Billy, you're breaking my brain right now because if you bet on Furman. This is the entire spreadsheet thing.
But then you bet on Purdue. But then you bet on a parlay with other chalk picks.
You're not guaranteed that one of those two is going to win. Yes, you are.
No, you aren't. No, because Furman played UVA and Purdue played against FDU.
That's what I meant. You put it on FDU and you put it on Purdue.
Got it. Okay.
Yeah. All right.
Yeah. I'm sorry that I doubted you.
Yeah. Billy, we should also...
Rogers. Yeah Kind of worried though because it's not like official There's like a leverage situation He says he's coming He probably shouldn't have gone on national YouTube And said that out loud But I'm happy he did He's going to be there And then he he bodied Schefter.
I mean, he's coming out swinging. I mean, this isn't going to go down in Jersey like fucking, it's going to be really, really bad, or it's going to be really, really awesome.
If you ever thought it would be like to interview someone coming straight from St. Patrick's Day, I'd say it's going great.
To Billy's credit, I don't think. It's going to be like the Hindenburg, another New Jersey crash, or it's going to be like awesome.
Or Tony Soprano. Yeah.
Or a great blimp flight, uneventful. Yeah.
The good year. It's either going to be a good year or the Hindenburg.
Exactly. Blimp talk.
There we go. Feels like 69.
Don't say boom. Oh, my God.
What is this thing? Oh, that? Oh, my God. The Hindenburg.
You got to play that back. That's a classic.
When we had Stingray Steve narrating national tragedies, and he goes, all right, here we go, and it's the Hindenburg. Oh, no, the humanity.
Look at all the humanity. Oh, man.
That was a classic. Throwback.
Okay. Should we do who's back? And then we have a Monday reading as well.
So, Piazza, you got a couple ads and we'll do Who's Back? Yes, I absolutely do. I want to talk to you about Puparoni.
I love Puparoni. Billy, I actually have a question for you because all these other guys were here when I asked this question on Friday's show.
What breed of dog would be the number one pick in the basketball draft? Irish Wolfhound. Good pick.
Yeah. That's a solid pick.
I like that. I think we said Harlequin Great Dane.
Great Danes don't have good footwork. Okay.
Yeah. But maybe a Greyhound, a tall Greyhound would be good too.
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See website for full details and important safety information. Okay, who's back of the week? Hank.
USA. Yes.
Yeah, we love the World Baseball Classic. World Baseball Classic.
Always have. We're going to the championship.
There was an electric game on Saturday night. Trey Turner had a walk, not a walk-off, but a go-ahead grand slam in the eighth inning.
Said it was the loudest crowd he's ever witnessed as a player and the best hit in his career. I'd like to point out that when he won that World Series for the Nationals, all four of our wins were on the road in Houston.
So, of course, it wouldn't have been that loud. For the record.
But you were leading in games at home. I don't think that we were.
Ever? We got smoked in most of those games. Okay.
Playing the winner of Japan versus Mexico tonight. So, if Japan wins, it should be Shohei.
And that would be unbelievable. There was some...
So, people were putting up stats, comparing the World Baseball Classic to regular baseball and kind of pointing out how bad baseball is at promoting and social media and all that. The Trey Turner had 7 million views in 15 hours.
Shohei had a home run off the scoreboard earlier in the week that had 7.5 million views. Aaron Judge's 60-second home run had 3 million views.
And Bryce Harper Game 5 NLCS home run had 2. half million views so we we on Thursday we talked about Edwin Diaz and my take was simply like March Madness is going on I'm not going to watch the World Baseball Classic but if you if someone likes it cool good for them different strokes for different folks now that we're in the final I'm fucking all in yeah we've been very clear about our stance on this which is if the US starts to win and the flag starts to advance through the brackets then we're in the final, I'm fucking all in.
Yeah, we've been very clear about our stance on this, which is if the U.S. starts to win and the flag starts to advance through the brackets, then we're like, yeah, fuck yeah, USA, let's do it.
And also the atmosphere does look incredible. Yeah.
It looks like a lot of fun at these baseball games. Yes.
So, yes, we are rooting for USA. I hope it's against Japan just so I can empty the clip for more World War II jokes on the next podcast.
So looking forward to that, hopefully. Okay.
That's your who's back? Spanish-American jokes just don't hit the same. No.
And Rick Pitino. Yeah.
He's all the way back. Pia, it's your who's back.
I've got two who's backs of the week. First is the women's tournament.
Women's tournament's back. I start out 4-0 gambling on women.
They were calling me Mr. Women.
Then I went 0-2 today, unfortunately, because I got away from my system. I, much like Billy, have figured out a system to how to beat Vegas when it comes to the women's tournament.
You just take all the good schools minus the points, and it's super easy to do. Yeah.
So I got cute with it today, and I took Iowa, who's got the best player in the country, but they're not the best team necessarily. And then I took – who did I take in my other one? Oh, USF.
Took USF against South Carolina. That was a mistake.
But now I'm back. So my picks for tomorrow are going to be Tennessee minus 14 over Toledo.
Tennessee is a good school. UConn minus 15 over Baylor.
Just take the biggest spreads. The biggest spreads.
Bet the favorite on the biggest spreads. And my other who's back of the week is the Live Tour.
Yeah. Live Tour had a massive weekend.
My son Chris's ace is choked. He's been crying nonstop for the entire day about that.
They had a.14 rating 0.14 rating which i think that means

that the pga their uh their event this week had something like uh about 10 times the viewers

that live golf had so now the people that run live golf they're saying already that they're

going to start pulling the reins in on some of the spending in the next i don't know season do

they call it seasons yeah uh so the the fat times are over for the live tour because their ratings are so bad right now they're not pulling it on the cw i have a very simple way to solve this ratings issue okay execute the last place team every week would be it would be down for it yeah yeah relegation yeah Yeah, the ultimate relegation yeah to the afterlife yeah yeah i mean or they don't have cuts but they could chop your head off live tour is one of those things where we made probably too big of a deal of it because it's definitely not going to last it actually ended up helping the pga to yeah yeah a lot a lot a lot a lot and all these going to come back, right? I think the good guys are going to come back. I think some of the other people are going to get fucked over.
I think if you're a borderline player. I guess they made a shitload of money.
Yeah, if you're a borderline player, I don't think. If you're good enough, the PGA will take you back.
But I think they're going to look a lot closer at the people that, if they're not there, it won't matter. Yeah, I just imagine all the live tour golfers just being like,

this is fine.

This is totally fine.

I made the right choice.

Yeah, we're totally going to upend the entire golf world.

You think that's what it –

Because you're going to wear shorts.

That's totally what it was about.

Golf, but louder.

Yeah, golf.

Grow the game.

Okay, my who's back is the Wisconsin women's hockey team.

National title.

Shout out the Lady Badgers.

Dynasty.

Three out of four.

Three out of four.

Titletown.

Many are saying Madison is Titletown.

Won our NIT game today, too.

Yeah, Titletown.

So that's kind of going well.

I don't know.

Just kind of winning everything.

But, yeah, shout out the women's hockey team.

Awesome.

Beat Ohio State 1-0.

Real fun to win a game 1-0.

Just shut them down.

If you're a real puck boy like us,

then you know that 1-0 games are the most beautiful.

Yeah, so it felt good.

Felt good to win one.

Three out of four.

That's pretty fucking cool.

Three out of four.

The Ohio State can.

Don't be upset if you're a Buckeye fan.

You actually won the one out of four. So you were the only team that was able to stop wisconsin uh last year when you won the title but yeah three out of four is a dynasty and then my other who's back is uh dylan brooks just being a pest he is uh it's hard to like follow nba while march madness is going on i don't really trust anyone who like doesn't at some of the March Madness.
Like, it's just, it's the best tournament. It's so much fun.
But, yeah, Dylan Brooks, I was seeing some highlights. He was just, he's an all-time pest, and he's just bothering the Warriors constantly.
So, he's back, and now the shit talking is back. And it feels like if we can get Warriors, Grizzlies in the first round, it'd be great.
And also shout out John Morant for going to rehab for like 70 hours. Yeah, no, he cured his gun in a strip club addiction that he had.
Yeah, there's also – I've been pestering him for a while. There was a funny tweet that was like – a reporter was like, yeah, John Morant in his two or three days in rehab didn't play any basketball, so he's going to have to ramp back up.
He probably forgot how to play basketball. I don't know.
I don't know. I hope he remembers how to play basketball.
I mean, the toughest part is the relapse, where if he gets back and he's not that good, you're going to fall back on old habits, and you're going to be like, I need to have a gun in a strip club again. Do you think they, like, weaned him off guns? Like,soft gun? Yeah, yeah.
It looks realistic. Nerf gun.
You can't quit guns cold turkey. No, definitely not.
But yeah, it was just funny to be like, yeah, he hasn't played any basketball, so he's going to need a little time to figure out how to beat basketball. What was it? Okay, here it is.
Adrian Wojnowski. Morant hasn't been playing basketball while at a counseling center in Florida, so his ramp-up is expected to extend past Monday's game versus Dallas when he's first eligible to return.
I'm hoping that he remembers how to play basketball. I hope it's not a 12-step program.
That would be a travel. Well, no, they won't call it.
It's the NBA. What if they did over, what is it over what's it called immersion therapy where instead of smoking you know if you get caught smoking a cigarette by your dad smoke a whole pack that's what i said a couple weeks ago the job marant they should just make him drive a tank everywhere yeah yeah or just this would suck or just like put him in he has to just live in a strip club with all the guns yeah yeah no just make him yeah make him fire off a nuke yeah how do you like this this is what it leads to all right billy you're who's back i was saving this part of the aaron rogers news for the who's back but i think zach wilson just hear me out okay this is delusional this is delusional st patrick's day brain this is delusional but i have a feeling now i know aaron rogers isn't doesn't have the longest history longest history of mentoring people, quarterbacks under him, but I actually could see that he might be the one guy that's able to fix what the fuck's happening in Zach Wilson.
This is really sad. Go on.
Didn't Zach Wilson say he's going to make somebody's life help? But I think that would have been like Derek Carr or Jimmy Garoppolo. This is incredibly sad.
He's going to make Aaron Rodgers' heaven. So not only is Aaron Rodgers going to like help us win now, but I think he could help build a quarterback of the future.
Why do you think it's going to work between those two? I just think they, I think they can figure it out. I think Aaron Rodgers is the one guy that Zach Wilson respects in the whole NFL and like definitely is one of those games.
Why? Why just him? Because Aaron Rodgers, the mask thing? No, no no oh um Aaron Flack has won just as many Super Bowls oh good point excellent point Hank that totally makes up for you not understanding the loss people forget that but in the quarterback world Aaron Rodgers just has like his whole uh his uh base fundamentals and like basically his hip mobility and flexibility. Oh, wait, Hank has a thought.
Hank just got a thought. Just struck his brain.
Nah, it doesn't matter. The way Aaron Rodgers plays the game has totally changed a lot of quarterback fundamentals, and that's sort of the school of thought that Zach Wilson came from.
His quarterback guru, they talk about a lot of the stuff that Aaron Rodgers practices and preaches. And even Josh Allen before Monday night game, they were getting into some of that.
The way that Aaron Rodgers played the game has totally changed quarterback mechanics especially. And just the way Aaron Rodgers throws the ball is just so unique.
So you think by Zach Wilson does it bad. I think Aaron Rodgers and Zach Wilson being in the same quarterback room is going to actually help Zach Wilson.
At least they do ayahuasca. At least they do ayahuasca together.
He's Mormon. He doesn't do anything.
He can't drink regular tea, much less tea with DMT in it. I think he might make him go, like, be a bad boy.
Oh, okay. And then Zach Wilson might get an edge to him, start playing well,

totally erase all the bad

interception games.

I feel bad.

I just think it could happen.

Billy, don't do this to yourself.

Just, Billy,

you have Aaron Rodgers

be thankful for that.

I know, but I think

it could just go so much farther.

Zach Wilson's going to be

in the XFL in three years.

The XFL is not going to be

around in three years.

The Celtics do control

their own destiny.

Because they play the Sixers one more time?

But again, if they both won all their games.

Well, that's impossible.

Right.

That is a wrinkle that you have just found out.

But the Celtics control their own destiny

because if they control the game against the Sixers,

then they will.

If either team wins out, they will have the higher seed.

So whoever wins.

But the Celtics control their own destiny. No, so do the Sixers.
No, but yes. Yes, yes, yes.
Every team controls their own destiny. No, that's not true.
Two teams control their own destiny. No, the Rockets, if they win out, do not get to the playoffs.
They don't control their own destiny. But if the Celtics and Sixers both win out, the Celtics would advance.
But they can't't win out but it's all about if they play

each other I think they both control their own destiny I think Hank Hank Loki has discovered determinism yeah the Celtics have the better head-to-head record but if the Sixers went out they have a better they are the second seed but if the Celtics went out they're the second seed Correct.

I think the Celtics have a better advantage.

You know what?

Hank has discovered a mathematical anomaly. How about that? You have.
Two teams control their own destiny simultaneously. At the same time.
But the Celtics have the head-to-head record. But again, go ahead, Max.
The head-to-head does not mean anything right now. Like, the Sixers have the better record.
The head-to-head means nothing. And even with that game, it doesn't matter.
It does matter. You guys should do a math podcast.
That's fine. When do you guys play? Is it a percentage? April 4th.
Wow. All eyes on April 4th.
I think the Sixers are home that game. Yep.
Well, that doesn't matter, Max. You're going to lose that game.
We do lose to the Celtics often. You got a couple big games against the Bulls coming up, Max.
Yeah, tonight. Yeah, back to back.
Back to back. Oh, one more thing that got lost in the March Madness weekend.
The Commanders signed our quarterback. It's Jacoby Brette oh hell yeah so it's uh i think hank said it's a real life we get lamar jackson we have lamar jackson at home meme come to life yeah uh jacoby brissette the only thing i know about him is he was uh he's got a hell of an arm because he was the designated hail mary thrower for back-to-back quarterbacks in Indianapolis.
Andrew Luck when he was recovering from shoulder surgery and Phillip Rivers when he was recovering from being old. And also Jacoby Brissett is the best non-Bush push quarterback sneaker in the NFL.
Now that Tom Brady's gone. Statistically, no, I think even for the last couple seasons, Jacoby's been better than everybody Besides Jalen Hurts On the push ones So our friend Sam Schwartzstein actually sent me These stats to make me feel better about Getting not Lamar Jackson as quarterback He said that The commanders went for it on 16 times From 4th and 1 or 2 And they averaged negative .97 EPA per play.
They only had a 50% success rate. Is there too many numbers at one in the morning? Okay, here's all you need to know.
For a backup quarterback. Sneaking the ball, not even throwing the ball.
If they went on it every single fourth, if the Commanders had gone on it with Jacoby Brissett at quarterback every single fourth and one, they would have added 32 points last season, meaning they would have won that game against the Giants and potentially been in the playoffs. Oh, okay.
This is a farther to reach than my Zach Wilson. It's numbers.
It's just too many numbers at one in the morning after March Madness. Like Zach Wilson doing ayahuasca makes more sense.
Billy might be right. No.
Billy might be right. It's numbers.
It's numbers. It's stats.
Like Zach Wilson doing conspiracies with Aaron Rodgers to be better makes more sense. And the most important part about being a quarterback is throwing the ball.
Yeah. Yeah, well, just let me cope.
Okay, we want to do the last and then we'll do Monday reading. Yeah, before we get to the Monday reading, I want to talk to you guys about our great friends over at BetterHelp.
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That's BetterHelp. dot com slash pmt okay monday reading time monday reading this was sent to me by an awl there is a a post on reddit right now and it's written by a guy who is in a madden league with kyler murray the title of this reading is kyler murray character issues are a real concern based off my madden League experience with him.
So wait, he played in an online Madden League? Madden League. Yeah, so like a full season with Kyler Murray as a player on one of the other teams.
Kyler Murray had some character issues brought up this past year. My story will touch on his character issues that may or may not affect his dynasty value.
linebacker and spin him around the lineman at snap this did something to the o-line while still having the middle of the field covered another one was running the same cheese plays all game if you had a fast enough wide receiver and the defense didn't have fast cornerbacks i disagree with that by the way if you find one like playing madden or a college football game like if you have one play that works just i mean shark wheel just run it would you do that against other online players if they can't stop it yeah stop it okay stop the play actually if they cheat on offense running the gimmick play on offense then you just counter that by cheating on defense and doing the cornerback linebacker move but just i hate when like oh you can't run the same play no if i have a play that works green bay power sweep run it this did something to the o-line while still having the middle of field covered another one was running the same oh yeah so that basically you couldn't cover the two routes as user unless you ran a specific defense well then run that specific defense yeah if you know what it is right but then they could just audible into the second cheese play and snap without any time for you to adjust the coverage there are others too so one of these leagues included kyler murray and we were in the same division in the first or second game of the season we played and he used these band tactics all game i reported him to the commish i believe a few others did too from my chats with the commission there was a post about warning and it seemed to stop we played again late in the season it was a big game to make the playoffs for both of us kyler murray played fair until the second half when he was down he pulled the same cheese plays and defensive tactics banned i messaged the commission again you know what i'm kind of i am on color yeah like this is i this guy went online this guy's a karen he went online to complain about kyler murray beating him in madden yep that's really what we're getting out of this i messaged this guy again and he said they would take care of it well the message board was flooded by a people defending these tactics, but not by Kyler directly. I'm assuming it were his buddies backing him up.
I think, reading between the lines here, I think Kyler Murray created a bunch of sock puppet accounts and then replied to this message on the message board, be like, no, it's fine, no, it's fine. Let him do it, let him do it, let him do it.ish stood his ground on not allowing it.
Finally, we met in the playoffs, and Kyler used every cheese tactic in the book. Good.
People watched the stream and saw I ended up winning the game. You know what? Cliff Kingsbury should have done some cheese plays.
I was just thinking Kyler and Cliff Kingsbury definitely argued because he thought that some cheese plays would work in the NFL. Yeah.
Cliff should have incorporated these cheating plays. Yeah.
If you cheat in the NFL and get away with it, you're allowed to do that. Stop it.
That's all you got to do. Stop it.
This makes me believe he has a character issue if he acts this way in an inconsequential Madden League. This could translate to issues with his coaching staff and maybe even other teammates who dislike his demeanor in Madden.
I love this guy. You know what? I think Kyler Murray's in the right, but I love that this guy took the time to go online and complain about this and say that he's alienating teammates because they probably get beat by Kyler Murray and Madden.
Right, right. Take this story as you will, but it may be the tipping point for some people who want to buy or sell.
Nope. That did not change my opinion.
It just made me hate this guy. Yeah.
He literally, could you imagine, like, just, I don't think he realized.

He definitely went online and was like, I'm about to do something.

I'm about to really, like, do something here.

He probably DMed this to, like, every NFL reporter.

Yeah.

Like, hey, Adam Schefter, I got a scoop for you.

You thought you did something.

But in reality, if you take a step back, you were in a Madden League.

That's totally fine.

I respect everyone who video games.

I love video games.

I wish I could play them more.

You got your ass beat in the Madden League.

Sounds like three times.

And then you went online to be like, well, Kyler Murray's a bad guy

because he beats me with the same play,

and I can't figure out a defense to stop him.

This gives off major John Harbaugh vibes against the Patriots.

Yeah.

When he's like, hey.

Change the rules.

Yeah, exactly. Maybe it's John Harbaugh that wrote this.
I wouldn't be shocked. Jesus.
What are the all-time great video game cheat moves where people be like, yo, you're cheating? Because I've long stood on the throne of it's impossible to cheat at a video game. The jump in Rainbow Road.
But that's not cheating. That takes skill.
Right. Exactly.
That's skill. In B in in street fighter when you just do the slide at people the entire time the konami code that's the og what's that one up down up down left right yeah start or whatever but yeah that's not cheating because you're just playing the game you're playing the computer well when madden first came out in the 90s, I used to just change every single player to 500 pounds and seven feet tall.
Yeah, that's totally fine. Yeah, Michael Vick, like, running, just running the draw with Michael Vick.
Yeah, I used to do that. You couldn't do that.
You couldn't stop him. Bo Jackson and Tecmo.
Yeah. But, yeah, again, I don't know.
Stop it. Using Yoshi and Mario Kart, some people would say that's cheating.
Yeah, stop it.

The thing is, there is two schools of thought when it comes to Madden.

You can play Madden in ways that would never work in a real football situation that people exploit.

So some guys, when they're playing online,

they'll look at all the suggested plays to the defense that they run

or whatever offense.

No peaking, yeah.

No peaking.

No peaking is cheating.

They'll pull up all the plays that they know the other person will run and it's like it's like a whole chess match yeah yeah or not punting on punting downs but that's like again i don't know just stop them wasn't there a controversy in in some big madden tournament about punting i don't know oh yeah some guy put his punter as a quarterback he put his punter as a quarterback and then just ran the ball. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Because he used – Yeah, because then he – He's drafted his players and all of them were incredible and he just had a terrible quarterback. Yeah.
Which that does suck if you're playing against that guy and just getting the ball run down your throat. Yeah.
But again, I won a couple national titles running the ball. Run the damn ball.
Stu. Stefanski.
Yeah. All right.
Great show. Great weekend.
God damn it. Do I love March Madness? Thoughts and prayers to everyone for the next three days.
It really is a hard. They really should just.
Baseball opening day should be tomorrow. Yeah.
Like, give us something. Well, we'd have baseball tomorrow.
Yeah, we do. But it's at night.
But I need a day. We're big fans of the World Baseball Classic.
I need a day sport to ease myself off. I just sit there.
I'm like, well, what do I do now? Rugby Six Nations. You get to the fourth day of March Madness.
You're like, is this every day? We get to just watch basketball? Okay. Hank, have you ever gotten this? The lottery ball? I've not.
I want to actually say something. Great, great times at Columbus.
The sportsbook was awesome. Shout out to everyone who came out.
It was awesome to see people out there, everyone who watched. On Saturday night, my brain was so toasted.
I came back from going to the bathroom, and someone was like, is Hank ever going to get the lottery ball? And I said, yes. And then someone else from the crowd said, Big Cat, you just said yes.

He's never going to get it.

I was like, yes.

I meant no.

So I just want to correct that.

Shout out that one guy.

I meant no.

He's never going to get it.

Numbers.

6-9.

7.

Why are you doing 7?

Why not?

Take a crazy chance.

All right.

I'll do 17.

Wait, should we get a number from Jake?

He's 18

Every time

I'm gonna go 77

20

Good luck Hank

Thank you

Sorry I got sick

Nah

Your color's back though

Yeah no I feel better

That was weird

Weird show

54

You really thought you had something with seven. You're the Kyler Murray guy on Reddit being like, I got something here.
Seven. What was the thought process behind seven? I was just thinking that seven was going to come up.
Oh, but you were wrong. Yeah.

It is shocking hanging out with Hank

and the amount of people that come up to him

and just say numbers to him.

No, he has to get this before we move to Chicago.

We were talking about that the other day.

He needs to get this because it's just going to be new bars,

just a whole new group of people that can just.

Guys were whispering numbers in this area.

You've got to get it.

What if Hank can't move until he gets the number?

He'll never...

I mean, he'll die.

He stays in New York.

If he...

I wouldn't wish that a whole lot.

You want to do one more?

That's a joke.

Yeah.

Do I have a count?

Yeah.

All right, 17.

Seven.

This would be great if he gets it because it's such a Mickey Mouse.

77.

Doesn't matter.

No, it's...

You said yes. It would be so Mickey Mouse.
It would be so Mickey Mouse. It would be counts.
99. Even farther away from 7.
Oh, damn. Memes had 55 in the first one.
He was one off. All right.
We'll see everyone on Wednesday.

Love you guys.

Flamingos can only swallow upside down.

Hell yeah.

They can't swallow.

They can only eat upside down.

I don't know.

I'd say I'd say it anyway.

Today is my day to find you.

Shine away.

I'll be coming for you. All we got So needless to say I'm all set in But I need some little weight So the life is okay Stay up to me It's so better to take the time Take time Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me

Take me