March Madness Recap, 4 Days Of Upsets, Chaos And Awesome Moments + Monday Reading About Kyler Murray

Speaker 1 Hey, pardon my take listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music.

Speaker 3 Mint is still premium unlimited wireless for a great price.

Speaker 1 So that means a half day.

Speaker 3 Yeah, give it a try at mintmobile.com/slash switch.

Speaker 4 Up from payment for $45 for three-month plan, equivalent to $15 per month required. New customer offer for first three months only.
Speed slow out for 55 gigabytes.

Speaker 1 On today's part in my take, March Madness recap of the last four days of our lives, everything that happened, all the upsets.

Speaker 1 No guests, it's just the boys in studio today because we got a lot to talk about. We also have to talk about Aaron Rodgers from Billy's perspective.

Speaker 1 I don't even know what else happened in the sports world, but we have a Monday reading, Who's Back? Great show for everyone. Everyone's probably picking themselves off the mat after a crazy four days.

Speaker 1 Getting back to work. Hopefully, we can give you some entertainment going into that.

Speaker 5 Hey, it's PFT here, reminding you that Boars Head makes game day entertaining elevated and effortless.

Speaker 5 Whether you order catering platters ahead from your local Boars Head retailer, or you create your own spread at home with Boars Head premium deli meats and cheeses, you are sure to impress your guests.

Speaker 5 My favorites like oven gold turkey or blazing buffalo-style chicken, paired with their classic Vermont cheddar or creamy monster cheese, are sure to score big and help me elevate my entertainment every time, whether it's for a tailgate or a home gating celebration.

Speaker 5 Seriously, guys, it's a game-changing flavor for every gathering. Boarshead, committed to craft since 1905.

Speaker 1 Okay,

Speaker 1 let's go!

Speaker 1 Now in the street, there is violence,

Speaker 1 and then a lot of soft work to be done.

Speaker 1 No place to hang a low washing,

Speaker 1 and then a gambling

Speaker 1 all on the sun. Oh no, we're gonna rock it down to Electric Avenue,

Speaker 1 and then we'll take it higher.

Speaker 1 Oh, we're gonna rock it down to easy. Part of my take

Speaker 6 presented by Barston.

Speaker 1 Welcome to Part of My Take. Today is Monday, March 20th.

Speaker 1 And holy shit, boys. March Madness.
We are still alive.

Speaker 1 And I don't know why. I've just spent the last four days watching every second of basketball.
Gained probably 15 pounds. Feel absolutely like dog shit.
Haven't slept. but man, was that fun.

Speaker 5 I've got a new winner from the weekend. Yeah.
It was a loser on Thursday, but biggest winner of the weekend,

Speaker 5 the University of Virginia. Yeah.
UVA, big time, dodged a bullet because

Speaker 5 not only did their loss against Furman, it wasn't even close to being the biggest upset of the tournament so far, but also they're no longer the only 16-seed to go down to a one-seed thanks to Purdue and FDU.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 5 Somebody told me, I don't know if this is true or not, someone told me that FDU, they changed their name to the Paladins, which we, what did we figure out? No, that's Furman.

Speaker 1 Firmins. Furman.

Speaker 5 Sorry, sorry. Fulman changed their name to the Paladins.

Speaker 5 But Furman used to be called Furman University Christian Knights. Yes, fuck.
And that spelled fuck. So if you saw those hats that had the lines on the front, all the kids were buying those.

Speaker 5 They were hilarious. Yes.
I had a Cox one myself.

Speaker 1 Everyone had the Cox one.

Speaker 1 That was as chuggy as it got. It was 90s.

Speaker 5 It was. That's cap.
No, I do think that UVA

Speaker 5 came out of the weekend smelling a lot better than they smelled on Thursday.

Speaker 1 So we're going to recap everything. We're going to try to do a little bit of chronological order, even though our brains are still pretty scrambled.

Speaker 1 I don't know about you guys, but I feel, my body feels terrible.

Speaker 1 I feel like we did four NFL Sundays in a row. But we will start with Purdue.

Speaker 1 The story of the tournament. Purdue losing to Fairleigh Dickinson on Friday.

Speaker 1 Fairley Dickinson, the shortest team in the tournament, the worst schedule in NCAA basketball. They were 363 out of 363 in strength of schedule.
They also didn't even win their conference tournament.

Speaker 1 That was Merrimack, and Merrimack wasn't able to play in the tournament because the four-year stupid grace period. Merrimack actually should get credit for all Fairleigh Dickinson's wins.

Speaker 5 Should we do a pizza party for Merrimack?

Speaker 1 We should. We should do a pizza party for Merrimack.
If the coach Joe Galloway.

Speaker 5 If the coach reaches out to us directly and asks for a pizza party, it's yours.

Speaker 1 I saw Merrimack play against Long Island University when I took my son, and the coach was like, What the fuck are you doing here? And I was like, I'm just watching ball. I love ball.

Speaker 5 You say Joey Callow?

Speaker 1 Joe Gallo. Okay, got it.
Joe Gallow. So, great coach.
They'll be in the tournament next year. So, Fairleigh Dickinson,

Speaker 1 worst strength of schedule, shortest team. The conference they come from, the NEC, was 0-31 in the round of 64 in the history of the conference.
They had never won a round of 64 game.

Speaker 1 They take down Purdue, Matt Payner, Zach Eady, Purdue, the one seed, probably

Speaker 1 the lowest that Purdue can get. And Purdue has been in some really low places because Purdue now, 2021, they lost to a 13-seed North Texas.
2022, they lost to a 15-seed St. Peter's.

Speaker 1 2023, they lost to a 16-seed Fairleigh Dickinson. Good news for Purdue.
Say something nice about Purdue. There are no 17 seeds, so it feels like we've reached the bottom.

Speaker 1 They'll probably find a new way to do this and make it worse, but right now it feels like this is the bottom for Purdue.

Speaker 5 We should do the Ravel tweet when Dunk City won back in, what year was that? 2013. 2013, which is like, don't feel bad for the guys.
This is their college campus. Don't feel bad for Purdue.

Speaker 5 They get to go back to school in West Lafayette, Indiana.

Speaker 1 This is, and I, listen.

Speaker 1 I'm not a fan of Purdue. They're, you know, in the Big Ten.
I root against them.

Speaker 1 And I will admit, hand up, on Friday night when I got back to our hotel room at like 1.30, I probably spent about an hour laying in bed just reading all the Purdue blogs, stories, everything that I could read.

Speaker 1 It's worse than bad. Like, it's rock, rock, bottom.

Speaker 1 That team, I don't know where they go from here.

Speaker 5 My takeaway was that Zach Edie, without Zach Edie, Purdue would not have made the tournament. They probably wouldn't have even made the NIT.
Zach Eady was the only one doing anything.

Speaker 5 And granted, he didn't shoot for the last, whatever, five, six minutes of the game, but they were triple teaming him every time he got got the ball.

Speaker 5 Their strategy was just, we're going to smother this guy with the tiniest dudes that we can find and just really confuse him.

Speaker 5 And so he's obviously going to try to pass out of that triple team, and then nobody could make a shot on Purdue. They stink except for Zach Eady.

Speaker 5 It was painful to watch

Speaker 5 with the expectation that you knew that Purdue was favored by a lot of people to make it. This was going to be the year if they win.

Speaker 1 Some people had a future on them. Some people had a future on them.
Some people bet on them.

Speaker 5 Some people bet on them. Those guys are fucking idiots, and they should never talk publicly about college basketball.

Speaker 1 If you said, if you had a future on Purdue to win the national championship,

Speaker 1 nobody should ever

Speaker 1 paint for watching PF so here's what happened. I bet on Purdue in this game when the whole sports book was rooting for the upset, because that's what happens in March.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Upsets like start once the wave starts.

Speaker 1 It's why March Madness is so special. You can feel it in the arena.
You can feel it in the sports book if you're at a bar.

Speaker 1 If there's an upset brewing, everyone kind of perks up and they start paying a little more attention. And even if you don't have a bet on it, you're like, go, underdog, go.

Speaker 1 And you were sitting there in that year. I was the only one having a bad time.
I didn't say a word.

Speaker 1 Zach Edie would dunk on like a 5'11 guy, and PFTU would be like, yes. I would be like, dunk on that idiot.
Yeah. It literally was David versus Goliath, and you had Goliath minus 14 points.
Yeah,

Speaker 5 I had David going down in the first round. It was tough.
And I did in the second half. I wanted to root for FDU because obviously I don't like Purdue.

Speaker 1 When When you realize you're not going to win your bet, you're like, fucking lose up.

Speaker 5 My whole thing was I don't want to publicly switch sides and start cheering for FDU because

Speaker 5 whatever streak I was on on Friday, where I was at a point where I was 0 for 8 in my last 8 and I was down bad and I was about to lose my bet on a one seed, not just against the spread, but straight up.

Speaker 5 I just said, I think I whispered to Spider, I was like, you know what? I'm going to,

Speaker 5 I'm internally going to be rooting from this point on for FDU, but I don't want to transfer my bad vibes to him. So I'm just going to sit here in silence and just be miserable with myself.

Speaker 5 But it was, you're right. They were the shortest team.

Speaker 1 Well, they said effective height.

Speaker 5 Their effective height was the lowest of any team in the tournament. I don't know what that means.
There's probably guys that play.

Speaker 1 That means that they probably have a 12th guy that is like seven feet, but he sucks.

Speaker 5 Because I was going to say, what's my effect? Maybe I could just fudge another inch out of myself if I said

Speaker 1 effectively.

Speaker 5 Effectively, I play as a 5'9.5 guy. But so, yeah, they were going up against Purdue as well.

Speaker 1 They were too short for Purdue.

Speaker 1 You were saying saying it but it actually is true they were too short zached literally did he look like a cartoon character when it was like a bunch of little guys running around him tying him up tying his shoelaces together it was golder's travels yeah it was crazy it was actually too short and tobin anderson the coach for fdu all right Let's start with him because Matt Payner deserves a lot of criticism.

Speaker 1 He said after they beat Texas Southern on Wednesday night, we went to that game. Shout out Dave.
He also said that they could beat Purdue. But Tobin Anderson was like, I've been watching Purdue.

Speaker 1 We can beat them. And then his game plan was absolutely perfect.

Speaker 1 He was like, pressure their guards, the entire court, front everything with Zach Eady, basically havoc, and be like, Purdue, if you can make three-point shots, you can win this game by 20.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah, your guards can't. You lose this game outright as a 16-seed.
So it was like the perfect game plan. And Matt Painter, like, Zach Edie doesn't deserve criticism.
He's just a kid.

Speaker 1 He's probably like 25. Matt Painter,

Speaker 1 if you're a Purdue fan, I know that he's made Purdue very good, and they've gotten top five seeds, I think, in the last five tournaments.

Speaker 5 What have they done?

Speaker 1 I mean, the one thing that sucks for Purdue is they did lose in the, was it Elite Eight? That was Elite 8.

Speaker 1 To Virginia, who won the tournament on an insane, like, last-second play that went to overtime. So, like, they were very close.

Speaker 1 And that one they don't deserve blame for because that's as close as you can get in a very hard tournament to win. But the last three years, like, Matt Painter, you stink, buddy.

Speaker 5 Yeah, but you're right. He should have done something.
There should have been an adjustment made at halftime when everybody was like, well, you're going to lose this game.

Speaker 5 It wasn't, it was by no means a fluke. After the first half, it's like this team matches up really well against.
If Purdue had, if Ivy, right, Chucky Ivey? Jaden Ivey. Jaden Ivey.

Speaker 1 If they gave Chucky Hepburn dropped 27 in the NIT today, no big deal.

Speaker 5 If Jaden Ivey was on this Purdue team, they'd probably win the game by like 20 points.

Speaker 1 But Jaden Ivey lost to a 15 seat.

Speaker 5 He did, but

Speaker 1 I don't know if you could say that.

Speaker 5 That's earlier. That's before Zach Eady got good and he became a solid passer.

Speaker 1 But that's what I'm saying. Like, Purdue's had players.
Purdue's had good teams. They get to the tournament, and Matt Payner, for whatever reason, the disappointment follows.

Speaker 5 This wasn't a fluke for FDU. If they play a best of seven series, I think FDU could beat Purdue probably three times, three, four out of seven.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I'd say four out of seven.

Speaker 1 They were better.

Speaker 1 Just a better team. They were better coached.
The speed they played with, they had like, and they just were so unafraid.

Speaker 1 And I know we'll get to Sunday's game where they end up losing, but this is why March Madness is so special: if you win one game as a 16 seed, you're remembered forever.

Speaker 1 You don't have to go win the tournament. Like these underdogs get remembered forever.
We just talked about Florida, Gulf Coast. Who doesn't remember Dunk City?

Speaker 1 You know, like you can basically write history and make careers out of one awesome upset.

Speaker 5 Yeah, the new market inefficiency is having short players on your team.

Speaker 1 They've been short for them. They were strong.

Speaker 1 They're like odd job from GoldenEye.

Speaker 5 It's like a cheat coat. It's tough to hit them.

Speaker 5 It's really tough.

Speaker 5 Here's a fun stat. In the 64-team era, there have been 36 teams to enter the tournament as a winner, two-seed that weren't ranked in the preseason AP poll.

Speaker 5 They have combined for zero Final Fours, averaging fewer than two wins per tournament. Purdue and Marquette were the two teams that fit into that criteria this March batch.

Speaker 1 Yeah, no,

Speaker 1 the preseason poll, as much as people make fun of them.

Speaker 5 They nailed it with UNC.

Speaker 1 For football and basketball, they actually do mean a little something when it comes to basketball in the tournament.

Speaker 1 Jake, do you think Matt Payner should be fired?

Speaker 1 Say it.

Speaker 5 Fire is that. Jake, this is unforgivable loss.

Speaker 1 Fire is at.

Speaker 1 Do you want me to read it again? 13 seed, 15 seed, 16 seed.

Speaker 1 He's the Bizarro World Tomizo.

Speaker 6 Indiana is a basketball state, isn't that correct? It is, yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Get him out. Yeah, fire is ass.

Speaker 5 There we go, Chief. String him up by his toenails.

Speaker 7 What's the saying in Hoosiers?

Speaker 6 In 49 states, it's a sport or something. Indiana, it's a sports sports.

Speaker 1 My team is on the floor.

Speaker 1 That's Hoosiers.

Speaker 5 My team is on the floor. This rim is 10 feet off the ground.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 My team is on the floor.

Speaker 6 He's got four feet. In 49 states, it's just basketball, but this is Indiana.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Get him out.
Get him out.

Speaker 6 That's the quote I was looking forward to.

Speaker 1 Bring back Brad Stevens. I am curious because it is like a

Speaker 1 possible place to be in as as a fan where Matt Painter has made Purdue very good and they're winning Big Ten titles, Big Ten championship, tournament championship this year.

Speaker 1 But then you get to March and it's like the most painful, excruciating embarrassment possible.

Speaker 5 Yeah, it was bad. It was bad.

Speaker 1 Really, really, really bad.

Speaker 5 So New Jersey is now the kingdom of upsets in the tournament. Yep.
Between St. Peter's and now and Princeton

Speaker 5 also and FTU. That's the state of underdogs.
Yeah, it is.

Speaker 1 It is. So

Speaker 1 other games from Friday, I mean, Purdue, that was the game. That was the game that everyone talked about.

Speaker 1 Vermont, no.

Speaker 1 It was a fun time. Didn't even cover the spread.

Speaker 5 Was it fun? Was it fun?

Speaker 1 Was it fun? It was cool.

Speaker 5 I don't think it was fun. It was cool.

Speaker 1 It was cool. Yeah.
It's cool to see them play. Yeah.
Okay.

Speaker 1 Iona Yukon, Rick Petino lost, and then it was like maybe an hour later he was at St. John's.
Not officially at St. John's, but the report came out that like they're finalizing a deal.

Speaker 5 I love it. It was very funny.
And to Rick's credit,

Speaker 5 they hung in there in the first half.

Speaker 1 They were in half. Yeah, they were up in half.

Speaker 5 In true Rick Petino fashion, they came out strong. Very strong.
And fast. Very fast.
Yeah, so they were running the court. That was a fun game for the first half.

Speaker 5 We thought we had a chance, but no, Rick Petino, his

Speaker 5 seed was eliminated yet again.

Speaker 1 Yes, it was gone. I'm trying to think of what other games, I mean, we saw.
So the big story from this tournament is everyone just sucks at shooting.

Speaker 1 I don't know if it's Sam Decker, friend of the program, said the ball is lighter and it's like shooting a balloon.

Speaker 1 There's also been talk about the rims because they had to, you know, change up the rims and

Speaker 1 adjust them.

Speaker 5 A lot of rims. The rims in both Greensboro and Des Moines were just insane.

Speaker 5 There was something fishy going on there.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and we had,

Speaker 1 there was no better showcase of that than Iowa State, who I think they made a couple of baskets at the end of the game, but with like three minutes left, they were shooting 19% from the field.

Speaker 1 They ended up shooting 9.5% from three. It's been a bad.

Speaker 1 If you're an underbetter, you're probably listening to this on your yacht right now because it's just been every single under possible.

Speaker 1 And we have Bob Ryan was right because everyone's talking about the shooting being terrible. Bob Ryan came in from the clouds today.

Speaker 1 And so Jeff Goodman said, overall, three-point shooting in the NCAA tournament entering today's action, 30.6%.

Speaker 1 Bob Ryan comes in from the clouds. You know, you just entered my wheelhouse.
The three-point shot is the worst thing to happen to basketball in my lifetime. It has distorted the game at every level.

Speaker 1 It was never necessary. It was the gimmick of a promoter named Abe Saperstein.
Yeah.

Speaker 5 Bob Ryan was right.

Speaker 1 Hashtag Bob Ryan was right.

Speaker 5 Steph Curry ruined basketball.

Speaker 1 He has like a little alert go off in his house whenever someone's like, three-point shooting sucks.

Speaker 5 And you know what? Bob Ryan's kind of right. Bob Ryan's low-key right about this.

Speaker 1 Well, I wish he made more threes.

Speaker 5 But also, the three-point shot is awesome. Like, as a fan of watching sports on TV, I like the three-point shot, but it has drastically changed the sport.
And not always for the good. I do miss

Speaker 5 having just dudes bang down low. Yeah.
I miss that. I miss just like two dudes banging into each other.

Speaker 1 Well,

Speaker 1 they don't let them play. They don't let the dudes bang.

Speaker 5 They don't let the dudes bang down low.

Speaker 1 I've been very upset about that many times watching college basketball. They're not letting the guys bang down low.

Speaker 5 Yeah, at least not in Florida. So there's also a proposal where you have the three-point line go off to the side, so it doesn't you don't have a side three-pointer.

Speaker 5 That's the three-point line connects to uh, to the sidelines that's usually where it goes. It sounds European, it does, it does, doesn't it?

Speaker 5 It feels European, it feels like what you'd see in the Olympics.

Speaker 1 It feels FIBA, yeah, it feels like FIBA is getting its hold on basketball.

Speaker 5 Globalism, I don't like it.

Speaker 1 Nope, I'm not a fan of that. Uh, Jake,

Speaker 5 our way out of this, we just got to keep digging. Yeah, make the four-point line.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I was saying

Speaker 5 and then past half-court, the five-point line.

Speaker 1 There should be a circle at half court that's a five-pointer. Yeah.
That would make games a little more exciting at the end when you're down four. It's like game's not over.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Can hit a five-pointer. Jake, other thoughts from Friday? Anything else?

Speaker 6 Yeah, Friday, Kentucky got a tournament win. Obviously, they're eliminated, and with Providence has lost, there's growing speculation that Ed Cooley is going to jump to Georgetown.

Speaker 6 So something to monitor.

Speaker 6 We'll see if he makes that jump within the Big East Conference.

Speaker 1 Are you taking John Calpapari off the hot seat?

Speaker 1 Out. Oh, Jake's firing everybody.
Jake is fucking insane right now.

Speaker 5 I think that egg coolie to Georgetown would be an awesome hire for Georgetown.

Speaker 6 But Providence is his spot.

Speaker 5 Georgetown just has a lot more resources.

Speaker 6 Yeah, he's a Providence guy.

Speaker 5 So he might be using this just to get a couple million dollars more.

Speaker 1 I've heard the boosters have stepped in.

Speaker 6 For Providence? Yes.

Speaker 1 Yeah. So we'll see.
And by that, I mean I read it on Twitter. Oh.
So I don't have any sources. I have zero sources.

Speaker 1 Although, Mike Ropoli is who we know, who's a friend of Barcelona who did the big brain show with us. He has said that he's going to be very involved if Rick Petino goes to St.
John's. He's a St.

Speaker 1 John's alum. So I'm hoping he just runs that program like it's his own.

Speaker 1 He tried to buy the Mets with A-Rod, was denied. I hope he just runs St.

Speaker 5 John's like a professional team. It was very funny after the game because Rick Petino did say before and after the game that people just write whatever they want on the internet.

Speaker 5 It doesn't mean there's any truth to it. And then about, I'd say, four minutes after the game was over, it was reported, yeah, this is basically a done deal.

Speaker 1 Listen, Rick Petino, Hall of Fame denier of facts. Yeah.
He just can get in front of a microphone and just tell you, like, this is not what's happening.

Speaker 1 And then literally walk off stage and have it be printed, like, this is exactly what's happening. He's like, nope, that's not happening.

Speaker 5 So some people are speculating Petino to St. John's, Tobin Anderson, whoa, to Iona.

Speaker 1 Whoa. Step up.
Okay. Yeah, big march.
Step up.

Speaker 6 Friday, we also had two near-buzzer beaters, TCU coming back to beat Arizona State, and then FAU over Memphis.

Speaker 1 Which was great. That was a great.
Totally well-officiated game.

Speaker 5 Crazy game.

Speaker 1 No, no, no.

Speaker 5 Shout out to Owls staying at our hotel.

Speaker 1 Memphis got broke.

Speaker 5 Memphis got hosed. The NCAA clearly still has it in for

Speaker 5 Penny Hardaway because the calls at the end of that game were just, they were ludicrous. Yeah.

Speaker 5 Between the non-timeout call that they missed, and also there were a couple questionable foul calls, some dodgy stuff at the end.

Speaker 1 The jump ball was the one that was

Speaker 5 just had the ball. The jump ball.

Speaker 1 And they just, FAU just barely got a finger on it.

Speaker 5 it they're like jump ball it was bad it was bad shout out Memphis Hank if we still did the crying I missed the crying Jordan meme yeah I think I officially it's time to bring it back yeah because I wanted to see the crying Jordan meme on the Memphis Bass Pro Shop Pyramid yes it would be nice it would be nice uh Hank how how was your Friday we're just recapping everything my Friday was good I mean it's tough to bounce back uh after Thursday but I had a I had an average Friday average Saturday that's good But watching the games it was a lot more fun.

Speaker 3 I had FDU.

Speaker 3 I did wish, you know, I was in a spot where I was like, oh, I think FDU could win, but I only put a little bit on it, but it was still very fun to watch.

Speaker 3 And it was cool knowing that we were there, seeing them in the play-in tournament. We saw their birth.
Every time that highlight plays, it's like a little fun fact: like, oh, yeah, we saw them.

Speaker 3 We saw them there. Yeah,

Speaker 3 we saw them in Dayton. We saw it coming.

Speaker 1 We bet all, yeah, we had like the FDU in that game, and then they went and won the next game. It was awesome.
The whole thing was great. So FDU is a memorable.

Speaker 1 Something about being in a sports book for three days straight, and we were just eating. I think I ate Chinese food, pizza, and burger every day with a milkshake to like ease my.

Speaker 1 I was using milkshake as tums. Yeah,

Speaker 5 it was good because it kind of coached the stomach a little bit. Yeah, they should make a Pepto-Bismo-flavored milkshake.
That was good.

Speaker 1 As soon as it was like, yeah, I need a milkshake. I'm starting to get a little heartburn.
I think

Speaker 5 we should bring a sunlamp next year because we forgot what time of day it was. We forgot what day it was, too.
It was just,

Speaker 1 we're at war. I was saying

Speaker 1 next year we should have at the airport like a parade or something, like bring our boys home when we come back from not to minimize war, but when we're fighting for everything in March Madness,

Speaker 1 I would like to come back to a dog like, you know, jumping in our lap and a big sign that says, welcome home, boys. It would be nice.
It would be nice.

Speaker 5 The least they could do.

Speaker 8 The Pro Football Football Show is presented by the Chevy Silverado. Built for the hustle, ready for the game.
Chevy Silverado is America's most dependable full-size truck.

Speaker 8 Whether you're grinding through the week or gearing up for kickoff, the Silverado is one ride that's always game ready. Just like football, it's about grit, grind, and getting it done.

Speaker 8 Head to Chevy.com to learn more and build your own Chevy Silverado.

Speaker 1 Okay, Saturday. Saturday.

Speaker 1 I did go, I went to the gym on Saturday morning

Speaker 1 and my brain was so scrambled, I thought I had lost my, I couldn't find my headphones. So I went to Target to try to buy headphones.
Went into Target. It was like a Saturday.

Speaker 1 Everyone was shopping in Columbus. And I asked where the headphones were.
They pointed me to a place where it was like $500 wireless headphones. I was like, I can't do this.
I'm out of here.

Speaker 1 Went, worked out, walked out of the gym, put my hands in my pockets. My headphones were in my pockets the whole time.
So that was where my brain capacity was at on Saturday when I woke up.

Speaker 5 So I also went to the gym on Saturday morning.

Speaker 5 I went down to the gym that we had down in the fourth floor of our hotel. And there's a guy that's walking on the treadmill, and he's wearing like a

Speaker 5 sweatsuit, and he's got like his hat pulled down real low, and that's the only treadmill that's open. And he's walking, and I get on there, and I start running.

Speaker 5 You know, kind of a big dick move, except on the treadmill, you start running next to the guy that's just walking. And I look over, I glance over at him, and he looks back at me, and it's Dave.

Speaker 5 And Dave gave me this look, like, why the fuck are you running while I'm walking? And I was like, Yeah, that's fair. So he gets off the treadmill.

Speaker 5 I'm thinking I'm going to do about, I don't know, two, three miles, something, something like enough to get a little sweat going.

Speaker 5 I I made it for a quarter of a mile.

Speaker 5 And then I was like, I have to walk. My body is not ready for this.
I've been watching basketball for two days. Exercise is not, it's not going to work out this morning.
Yeah.

Speaker 5 So yeah, I jogged a quarter mile on Saturday night. That's huge.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah, Dave does his hot boy walks.
When we were in Boston for Conference Championship Week, I had a similar experience where I was lifting, no big deal, and he was doing his hotboy walk.

Speaker 1 And we had like a glance to each other, like, don't take a picture of me. I won't take a picture of you.

Speaker 1 Because, like, you know, the content, the gym is the one place that you got to kind of try to shut it off. Yeah.

Speaker 1 So I didn't want to see him like taking a picture of me, like, penching, like, 100 pounds, being weak and shit.

Speaker 5 I wish he had taken a picture of me in my first quarter mile.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I would have to do that. I benched way more than that, by the way.
Okay, Saturday.

Speaker 1 It's great to know

Speaker 1 that Duke is still a bunch of soft pussy boys. They got bullied.
Tennessee bullied the fuck out of Duke.

Speaker 5 Well, it's Coach K's players, you know? We got to wait till John Shire reloads. I'm sure he's going to to get a great recruiting class in.
But, you know, there's only,

Speaker 5 you can't make chicken salad out of chicken shit all the time. Yeah, you can't.

Speaker 1 You have to retrain all of these players.

Speaker 5 You have to beat the Duke out of them.

Speaker 1 Yeah, right. And Tennessee did.
They beat the Duke out of him, right?

Speaker 5 Shout out Rick Barnes. Apparently, all Rick Barnes needed was to have absolutely zero expectations on him.

Speaker 1 All the injuries.

Speaker 5 And he knows how to coach in March now.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and the center for Tennessee, who owes his name,

Speaker 1 Plavich or something.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah,

Speaker 1 That guy just coming out, he was like, you know what I'm gonna do? I'm just gonna try to literally knock out Kyle Filipowski.

Speaker 5 Just elbows all day.

Speaker 5 Filipowski got caught with a nasty elbow early, and then he went back to his old bag of tricks, elbowed some guy in the nipple on Duke, knocked him down, and they called Duke for a blocking foul.

Speaker 5 So, yeah, I think it was

Speaker 5 FAU's coach. He said, yeah, it was Dusty May.
He said, we're going to have to study Australian rugby rules and get ready for the Vols. Yeah.

Speaker 5 So he knows that it's going to be, they're going to come out there and just try to knock him down.

Speaker 1 It was just fun. It was fun to watch a team just bully Duke around.
And Hank,

Speaker 1 sorry for your blue devils. You do have to get a cat now.

Speaker 3 I do not. But yeah, it was an ugly game.
They got the first elbow in the head. That was the game.
Yeah.

Speaker 5 Yeah. Well, you know what it was? The game was decided well before that, before the boys even stepped on the court, because Shire wasn't wearing the sweatshirt.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 They were wearing the same sweaters, different color.

Speaker 1 Black, which kind of were cool.

Speaker 5 Yeah, the gray one was way better.

Speaker 1 For their own funeral.

Speaker 1 Walked right into that one.

Speaker 5 Yeah, he did.

Speaker 1 He did. So where does Duke go from here, Hank?

Speaker 3 I think, like you said, they got to

Speaker 1 re-recruit, reload.

Speaker 1 Get some toughness. Get some toughness.
I'm willing to go down to Durham and elbow everyone on Duke if they need someone to give them some game experience.

Speaker 1 I'll just sit there and I'll just swing my elbows in everyone's face.

Speaker 5 That wasn't Duke basketball. Duke would never elbow or hit with a forearm one of their fiercest rivals in the face.

Speaker 1 No, no.

Speaker 3 They got to get that edge back.

Speaker 1 They got to get the edge back.

Speaker 1 They were soft. They were very soft.

Speaker 1 But it was great. It was great watching Duke lose.

Speaker 5 It's always fun watching Duke lose. That was a great color matchup, too.
Yeah. The Tennessee orange and the Duke Blue.
It was nice. It was pleasant to watch.

Speaker 1 My only complaint is I kind of needed John Shire to go a little deeper so that I could start my resume of hate.

Speaker 5 There's nothing to hate about him.

Speaker 1 Right. Like him going out where Duke just gets physically bullied.

Speaker 1 It doesn't do anything.

Speaker 5 You know what you can do already.

Speaker 3 He's still winning the ACC championship. It's like it's still an okay season.

Speaker 1 But it was really down here.

Speaker 3 It's not enough.

Speaker 3 Yeah, it's not enough to hate, though.

Speaker 5 He wasn't ready for March yet, though, is the thing.

Speaker 5 What you can start with on John Shire, you can just say like too much too soon. He might be in over his head.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I just needed Duke to go for like a little bit of a run, Elite Eight, so he could do something. Yeah.
I really need John Shire. Like, John Shire is a really nice guy.

Speaker 1 I need him to hit a small child or something. We can arrange that.
Do something. Something? Maybe he needs to sit down, take a look at the channel.
I don't think that's ever going to happen.

Speaker 5 No, maybe if he gets, what, hit a small child?

Speaker 1 Maybe if he gets pay time on his staff in the offseason. Yeah.

Speaker 3 I think he's just, he's a classic coach, good guy.

Speaker 1 He's a great guy. He's not going to do anything.
Yeah, I don't think that'll ever happen. I need him.

Speaker 3 He's not going to be cocky. He's not going to be.

Speaker 1 John Shire's putting me in a bad spot right now because I'm like, want to hate a guy who's a nice guy and I like.

Speaker 1 I need him to do something.

Speaker 1 So I don't want to feel bad about my hate for Duke. Maybe you should just start to like him.
No. I need him to choke someone.

Speaker 1 I was going to say maybe kick Coach K's dog, but that dog's been dead. He did not take care of that dog.
Remember that puppy? That puppy was, oh, that puppy.

Speaker 5 I don't recall the puppy. Yeah, the puppy.

Speaker 6 Didn't the university gift him a puppy?

Speaker 1 Yeah, and he was just like, oh, cool. And then he was like in Hawaii the next day.
Puppy was just sitting there trying to train itself.

Speaker 5 You think they gave one of those sweaters to Miss K?

Speaker 1 I don't know. Yeah, April 17th, 2020.

Speaker 5 Miss Kay, one of the sweaters?

Speaker 5 Probably.

Speaker 1 I found it. John Shire gave him the puppy.
Oh,

Speaker 1 fucking guy. So John.
Shire. He's such a nice guy.

Speaker 5 But no, John Shire gave away his dog.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Ms.
Kaye with those sweaters.

Speaker 5 She'd look good. Those sweater puppies.

Speaker 5 Wearing the sweaters and nothing. We got the bonkers.

Speaker 1 You want to put it on the bonk list? Go ahead, tough guy.

Speaker 1 See, this is like, I feel like we're in the Sopranos right now.

Speaker 1 Put your hands up. Fight me like a man.

Speaker 1 When Tony beats the fuck out of

Speaker 1 Jackie Apriel Jr. in the bathroom.
Yeah, but

Speaker 1 it's hard.

Speaker 5 That was right before they killed Jackie April.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but put your hands up. Fight me like a man.
Like, let me hate you.

Speaker 3 It's hard to get up when you don't even make the Sweet 16. Like you said, it's kind of just, you know?

Speaker 3 By the time Thursday rolls around, people will have forgotten about Duke.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I already did. And it's sad.
It's sad.

Speaker 1 How about Musk bust, Mr. March, until we get to Sunday? But Mr.
March in waiting.

Speaker 5 Yeah, Mr. March, he was awesome.
He's so energetic on the sidelines. And then he took off his shirt after the win.
That was a great game.

Speaker 1 Great game.

Speaker 5 Awesome game. Back and forth, back and forth, switching back and and forth.
But after the game, Musk goes up to the sidelines, jumps in the crowd, takes his shirt off, and he looks good.

Speaker 1 Looks real good.

Speaker 5 Musk has been doing P90X or something. He might be Keto because that's a bot that won't quit.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 He looks good. He coaches great.

Speaker 1 He's a giant killer. He's two years in a row.
He's taken down a one seed.

Speaker 5 I just wish that after the game he had gone back on the court to scout the next game, still shirtless. Yeah.

Speaker 1 That would have been sick. Because he was back out there.
Yeah.

Speaker 5 Oh, he was back out there within maybe five minutes.

Speaker 1 Instantly. He's ready to go.
But yeah, there's nothing. I mean, he's good for college basketball.
Like, he's a fun character, and his teams, like, this is what gets you, Mr. March and waiting.

Speaker 1 Your teams overperform when they get to march. Like, Arkansas has had a tough year, a lot of injuries, and now they're here, and they're like, hey, we're two games away from the final four.

Speaker 5 So Titus and I were talking about what the next step in college basketball is going to be, how it's going to become more like the NBA, where maybe some teams are going to start realizing that seating doesn't matter that much in the NCAA tournament.

Speaker 5 It doesn't. Start resting your guys.
The regular season doesn't matter.

Speaker 5 And for Arkansas, if you've got a great coach like Musk, as long as you get in and you're not a high seed, anybody can win anything.

Speaker 5 No matter what happens once you get in the tournament, you're going to have to play some tough games to win a championship.

Speaker 5 So you can't really, and you're not going to be able to plan out in advance who you're going to have because there are going to be upsets that happen. It's not going to be a straight path.
Right.

Speaker 1 And it's really the only thing that seeding matters is location, and they've already already kind of screwed that because we saw Houston. That was a game on Saturday.

Speaker 1 Houston had to play basically a road game at Auburn, and Houston, like, it was weird because we get to Saturday, Purdue's already gone, Kansas is gone, and Houston's down 10.5.

Speaker 1 And you're like, is this just the tournament where every one seed just loses? Because Alabama hadn't played yet. And they were down 10.5.

Speaker 1 And then they came out and they were like, oh, we're just going to be a BOA constrictor and just strangle the life out of Auburn. Auburn went four for 22 in the second half.
Yeah, the second half.

Speaker 1 Four field goals.

Speaker 5 From Houston was awesome. Shout out to Calvin Sampson.
He put together, he actually adjusted at halftime. So credit to him.
We were having a debate during the game on how much Bruce Pearl weighs.

Speaker 5 And you could tell me anywhere between 225 and 280 pounds.

Speaker 1 I would believe. What's his height?

Speaker 5 I think he's 5'11.

Speaker 5 If I were to guess, I'd say Bruce Pearl's 5'11. But

Speaker 5 he's like a stout guy.

Speaker 10 He's a stocky.

Speaker 5 He seems like he's dense, like he's got big bones.

Speaker 6 Unofficial 5'11.

Speaker 5 And I think that if you, if you're like 220. He probably loses 20 pounds a game in sweat.

Speaker 1 But he looks good.

Speaker 5 No, yeah, I'm saying like he he's stout. He wears it well.
So if you told me he was 220, I would believe you. If you told me he was 280, I would also believe you.

Speaker 1 He probably has like a weirdo trainer and he's in the facility at like 4.30 in the morning doing all kinds of workouts. Yeah.

Speaker 1 All coaches are like that.

Speaker 3 I also think you probably think he's smaller because he's around basketball players all the time.

Speaker 1 Yeah, true. Good point.
So he comes in. He towers over us.
He's actually actually 6'5 ⁇ . What the fuck? Yeah, it's like me.

Speaker 5 Everyone thinks I'm short because I stand next to Big Cat all the time.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you're actually six feet. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but they squeezed the life out of him. It was an insane performance.
Second half. Houston, we should talk about Princeton, the other giant killer.
They went, beat Arizona, busted Jake's bracket.

Speaker 1 Jake lost two of his final four teams in the first two days.

Speaker 6 Who'd you have three? Indiana.

Speaker 1 Oh, you have three.

Speaker 1 Now are you going to say the thing that's going to make me mad? Yes, I am. Okay, it's going to trigger me, but go ahead and say it.
I have a perfect region. He is a perfect region.
So far.

Speaker 5 With your eyes. What? Oh, in the bread.

Speaker 1 Yeah. No, yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 5 Wait, is that a region that had a lot of upsets in it?

Speaker 1 No. It had just Arkansas.
That was the only upset. Everything else was short.

Speaker 6 Let me ask something else. Does anyone else in this room have a perfect region? Yeah, I do.

Speaker 1 I actually have... I have four perfect regions, if you want to look.

Speaker 6 Okay, Mr. 72 at China Cock.

Speaker 1 Well, I mean, what are you talking about?

Speaker 5 He's calling Cap. Jay, call Cap on him.
Cap.

Speaker 1 Billy, will you look at that real quick and tell me how many regions I have perfect?

Speaker 1 Four regions. Four regions.
Thank you. I have the perfect bracket going.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 But Jake, you lost three out of your brain. Yeah, I understand it's an awful shitty bracket.
Whoa.

Speaker 1 Whoa, whoa.

Speaker 1 But I have a perfect region. There's nothing you can say to me.
Jake. Whoa.
Jake. Whoa.
It's bad. Language.
I'm going to back off because you seem like you're about to blow.

Speaker 1 Damn, I'm going to perfect the S-bomb on me. I have a perfect region.

Speaker 5 I'd like you to apologize to the listeners at home. I'm sorry.
Whoa.

Speaker 5 Do you consider yourself a man of faith?

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 6 Does he drive to LF?

Speaker 1 Yeah. He's got a perfect region.

Speaker 5 Princeton is absolutely killing offensive rebounds. That's the key.
They're getting second chance shots. They have, I think they have 29 offensive rebounds through two games.

Speaker 1 And they were, Mizzou was supposed to have just an insane advantage in terms of athleticism and the pace and everything. And it wasn't even a game.
They kicked the shit out of him.

Speaker 1 I want to read to you a paragraph that's so perfect because whenever we have an Ivy League school go deep in the tournament, it's like obviously everyone in the media went to an Ivy League school, so they just love talking about the Ivy League school.

Speaker 1 This is from the New York Times, the first paragraph about Princeton.

Speaker 1 Blake Peters, a sophomore guard for Princeton, plays Spanish classical guitar, speaks fluent Mandarin, and it turns out is as tough as nails when his tigers have a chance to advance the round of 16.

Speaker 1 You know what that guy sounds like?

Speaker 5 He sounds like in a romantic comedy, the lovable main character breaks up with his girlfriend, and then she starts dating this guy. Yeah, he played basketball at Princeton.
He plays flamenco guitar.

Speaker 5 Yeah,

Speaker 5 exactly. And he's a traitor on Wall Street also.

Speaker 1 Yeah, exactly.

Speaker 5 He's rich as fuck. By the way, Jamie Dixon.
But he can't, you know what? He can't make her laugh.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah. That's exactly it.
Princeton, all the nerds, it's very nice to root for Princeton.

Speaker 1 Jamie Dixon just told TCU to stop fouling, and they decided to foul, and the spread was foreign, so I'm going to lose. That was not fun.
He literally said, stop fouling, and they kept fouling.

Speaker 5 That's tough. I took TCU money lines.

Speaker 1 That ship had sailed.

Speaker 1 That was an unfortunate ending to a great game. Gonzaga goes to a sweet 16, probably the deepest they've ever been.

Speaker 5 For the first time ever. Yeah.

Speaker 1 That was such bullshit that they just said stop fouling. Give me a prayer.
Give me a prayer three. Oh, he's going to shoot it.
He's going to shoot it. He's going to shoot it.

Speaker 1 Oh!

Speaker 1 Yay!

Speaker 1 Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 Wait, no.

Speaker 1 Double check, I took the money. Oh my god.

Speaker 1 That was an awesome. I hope everyone's watching.
Are they going to review that?

Speaker 9 I hope everyone's watching

Speaker 1 on YouTube. What a way to end that game.
What a way to end the weekend. Nothing better than ending with a win.
Holy shit.

Speaker 1 That was awesome.

Speaker 1 T-Shear was plus four. They didn't pressure him at all.

Speaker 1 And he just dribbled the ball up or let the ball roll all the way up. Hank, you just missed an all-time moment.
Did you have it?

Speaker 1 I had a money.

Speaker 1 you had yeah oh fuck congrats big cup thank you it's good to win one like that's the 316 with momentum i haven't won one like that all tournament it feels like except fae they got completely the luckiest win of my life

Speaker 1 and memphis just got absolutely screwed you guys both had money line yeah and i had memphis too oh fuck and you had purdue I did have Purdue.

Speaker 5 I deserve all the bad things.

Speaker 1 I just remember looking over to you during the Purdue game, and you were seething with rage.

Speaker 5 I might have made one of the biggest mistakes of my life, gambling-wise, with the exception of the doink, by betting on all the one-seeds and the two seeds.

Speaker 5 I think next year I'm going to take every one and two seed money line or every 15 and 16 seed money line and just try to turn this around because this is that was a miserable experience.

Speaker 5 Never root for Goliath.

Speaker 1 I want to get back to Princeton real quick, but I want to tweet out this clip because I was an all-time cover. Give it up for Chicago.

Speaker 11 Sebastian Meniscalco's new stand-up special, It Ain't Right, is coming to Hulu on November 21st.

Speaker 1 30 years ago, Jeff Bezos, complete nerd. Bezos now ripped to shreds on his super yacht, and the boxes keep

Speaker 1 coming.

Speaker 11 Sebastian Maniscalco, It Ain't Right, premieres November 21st, streaming on Hulu and Hulu on Disney Plus for bundle subscribers. Terms apply.

Speaker 5 Hank, were you using the restroom?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 5 You had to go poop?

Speaker 3 No, I don't know.

Speaker 3 I don't know if it was the dinner we got, but I just got a weird, like, hot flash stomach thing.

Speaker 5 Did you poop? No. What'd you do?

Speaker 1 I, like,

Speaker 3 puked a little bit, like, dropped.

Speaker 1 What? He looks a little green.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I just got, like, super sweaty, and then I just, like, had to, like... You're the pupes guy.

Speaker 3 I mean, I don't know. What do you want me to say?

Speaker 5 I think you pooped.

Speaker 3 I would admit it if I pooped. I have no problem pooping.

Speaker 1 You missed Jake dropped shit on us. Whoa.
He got very triggered because he has a perfect region, this region right here that literally the only upset was Arkansas over Kansas.

Speaker 1 So he's lost three out of four Final Four teams, but he keeps saying, well, I have a perfect region.

Speaker 3 Yeah, that means nothing. Right.

Speaker 1 But he keeps saying, well, does anyone else have a perfect region?

Speaker 3 That's not even a win-you-year bracket.

Speaker 1 No. No.
And then he tried to show us that he was in like 10th place. It's like, but you don't have any points left.

Speaker 5 But that's like Charles Barkley's, his bracket is completely messed up right now. And I think he has that same perfect region.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.
That's exactly. Yeah, that's what I said to Jake.
I was like, That's the you don't know ball. I was like, yeah, Charles Barkley's entire, it was very funny.

Speaker 1 Every time they showed him, he just had to keep on Xing out every single spot in his bracket except for that region. That region has to have the most points.
Yep.

Speaker 1 If you picked one upset, you got the perfect region. Arkansas over Kansas.

Speaker 1 Okay, back to Princeton real quick.

Speaker 1 This guy, Mitch Henderson, their coach, he's so Princeton because he went to Princeton. He was on the team that beat UCLA.

Speaker 1 And like, I think you and I, PFT, share the same memories of, like, we think Princeton back door cut that one game against UCLA.

Speaker 1 Unfortunately, this is just a sign to never, like, go back into the past and look up old things.

Speaker 1 What was the score of that UCLA-Princeton game?

Speaker 5 I have no idea.

Speaker 1 Okay, because I remember it as like one of, like, because it was UCLA won the tournament the year before, Tyus Edney, coast to coast, all-time moment.

Speaker 1 I can't remember what round that was in. They lose to Princeton the next year, also all-time moment.
And I was thinking, like, I remember that game so vividly. It was such a great game.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Final score was 43-41.

Speaker 5 Oh, that's sick.

Speaker 1 I was like, damn it. That was one of my favorite tournament games, 43-41.

Speaker 5 Because we just remember the backdoor cut.

Speaker 5 The backdoor cut was so revolutionary back in 1996

Speaker 5 because

Speaker 5 no coach had thought to have their player just straight up run at the basket and then receive a pass. It broke basketball.
But you know what?

Speaker 5 distinctly remember how Princeton would run that play, too, because they would tell their guards, just dribble the ball with one hand and don't pick it up with two hands before passing it.

Speaker 5 Throw it with one hand off the dribble. Yeah.
And everybody's like, what is this Razzle Dazzle?

Speaker 1 And I remember they were just, they were showing it over and over the replays. Like, look at what Princeton's doing.
They're fucking him up with the backdoor cut.

Speaker 1 And again, like, if you asked me for iconic moments in my head for the tournament, like as a kid, that was one of them. 43-41.
Well, brutal.

Speaker 5 We probably would have had the over in that game.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and also,

Speaker 1 I watched, they had like a full game broadcast that I just peeped at, and I forgot that like you would just watch stretches of basketball games without the score on the TV screen.

Speaker 5 Yeah, you had to rely on the announcers to update you. Do you also remember having to call a number after games were over, like in the middle of the night to try to get what the scores were?

Speaker 5 Yeah, oh, yeah. You'd have to call the sports machine, or you'd have to call the score number.

Speaker 1 Yeah, because then you'd have to print it in the paper.

Speaker 5 Then you'd have to wait for 10, 15 minutes as they read every single score from every single game until he got to yours. World.

Speaker 1 That was that segment. But yeah, that was 43, 41.
But yeah, Princeton is like,

Speaker 1 they might just be good. Like, you know,

Speaker 1 FDU, they were good, but also they met FAU and lost. And it was like, oh, shit, that's probably what to expect.

Speaker 1 Princeton might just be good the way they beat Arizona, and then they just fucking killed Missouri. Like, killed him.

Speaker 5 If you can bang with the big boys and and box them out and get offensive rebounds, you can beat anybody.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and now they play Creighton, which will be, I don't know, two mid-majors

Speaker 5 going out. Battling it out.
Yeah, I mean, I think if you can beat a power five school like Mizzou, Princeton should be able to wipe out a mid-major like Creighton.

Speaker 1 Yes, absolutely. Absolutely.
Okay. Should we go to Alabama? Killed Maryland.
Sorry, Scott Van Pelt, though. Scott Van Pelta's had a great weekend with Edwin Diaz's injury.
So

Speaker 1 a guy can't have it all.

Speaker 5 Three of of his logos were spinning.

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 1 you can't have it all. UCLA is still alive, Max, even though every time UCLA plays, an injury happens.

Speaker 2 He literally said he's fine.

Speaker 5 He said that he's fine, which sounds exactly like what Max would say if you were to just ask Max in the post-game interview, Max, how do you think he is?

Speaker 1 Fine. He's fine.
He's fine. He's fine.
It's fine. If he lost one Super Bowl, it's fine.

Speaker 5 If he just repeats that he's fine enough, he'll be fine. So I'm going to put on my

Speaker 5 doctors wear? Stethoscopes? Yeah. I'm going to put on my PMT stethoscope and say that his ankle is very, very swollen.
Yeah. And his ankle is very, very badly sprained.
Yep.

Speaker 5 So he probably won't be fine.

Speaker 1 He won't be fine. At game time.

Speaker 5 Yeah. He might be like half fine.
Yeah.

Speaker 5 You didn't hear what he said. What did he say?

Speaker 1 He said that he's fine. Okay.
He's fine. He's fine.
He's totally fine.

Speaker 1 We should also mention.

Speaker 5 I'm just glad that Northwestern lost.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Northwestern lost. Darren Ravel did the fucking Tyson tattoo.
And like,

Speaker 1 just bummed me out. Whenever I see his tweets, honestly, bummed out.

Speaker 5 You ever listen to him talk? I wish he would bite my ear off.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but he just bums me out. Bums me out.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Northwestern lost. UCLA is marching on.
We should say, because another great wrinkle of the tournament, you know, those memes like guys will sit around and just name. baseball players for hours.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 5 Chef Blouser.

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 1 this happens with the tournament where we just get names and we keep them forever. And Andrew Funk is forever in our lore.

Speaker 5 He's going to be a name for sure.

Speaker 1 He had one game where he went 8 for 10. He unfortunately didn't shoot as well on Saturday night.
But god damn it, do I love that kid? Yeah.

Speaker 5 He might be like 25.

Speaker 1 I think he's 25.

Speaker 5 It was a very confusing game plan that they had him running against Texas. Yeah.
Where he would just stand on the perimeter.

Speaker 5 And they were guarding him almost like a box and one, where even when the lane was getting collapsed, their guy would stay out on him to make sure he didn't get an outlet pass.

Speaker 5 Turns out that's Funk's game for the most part. Yeah.
His catch and shoot on the perimeter. So they kind of neutralize that.
Yes. Texas is just way more athletic

Speaker 5 than Penn State is.

Speaker 1 Texas is very, very good. Texas is going to go up against Xavier in the Midwest, which has the one, two, three, and five still left.

Speaker 5 It's funny to me how

Speaker 5 all these new heads to basketball, the casuals drop in in the NCAA tournament, and they're like, whoa, Texas' coach looks a lot like Gus Fring from fucking bad.

Speaker 5 And I'm like, I knew that a month ago, man. Come on.
Get with the program.

Speaker 1 Chris Beard. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. That's the coach.

Speaker 1 But, yeah, Andrew Funk, we love you. We love you.
Yeah. Like, we did have some Andrew Funk moment.

Speaker 1 Thursday was fantastic. Saturday could have been an all-time moment if he hit that last shot.

Speaker 5 Were you saying about him or somebody else that Funk is definitely going to be a dozen trivia quarters?

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 5 Went to Penn State. Yeah.
Had that one game. He had an iconic moment.

Speaker 1 Yeah, this Penn State player went eight for 10 from three in the first round. And you'll be like, ah, ah, fuck.
Oh, that's close.

Speaker 1 No, yeah, yeah. And then Jeff will be like, nope, sorry, that's not it.
And he'd be like, no, actually, well, no, if it's your team, he'll give you credit for that. If it's Frank's team, he won't.

Speaker 1 He won't. He'd be like, sorry, that wasn't close enough.
But if it was your team, he'd be like, fuck. Yeah, no, you said funk.
Oh, okay.

Speaker 1 Let's do Sunday games.

Speaker 12 Hey, this is Rhea from Chicks in the Office. And this season, we're heading home for the holidays with Abercrombie and Fitch.
We all know our calendars are about to get chaotic.

Speaker 12 For non-stop plans, Abercrombie has the pieces to curate your perfect seasonal wardrobe, sweaters and denim for casual plans, party dresses for nights out, and comfy matching sets for everything in between.

Speaker 12 Keep the chaos cute this season in Abercrombie. Shop their new holiday outfits in the app online or in stores.

Speaker 1 All right, Sunday. Sunday, Sunday, Sunday.
The day that we're in.

Speaker 1 Should we talk about Mr. March, the official Mr.
March?

Speaker 5 We probably should. I have a question for you, B.
Okay.

Speaker 1 People are asking. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Speaker 5 I think Tom Izzo is underrated. I think he's underrated as a head coach.
For a while, he got so overrated that now he became underrated as a head coach. Mr.

Speaker 5 March himself, he seems to do this every single year. And, you know, for the record, when I said Tom Izzo might be overrated, I was saying to squat on that take.
Yeah.

Speaker 5 So I didn't believe it when I said it. Yeah.
I'm just declaring that

Speaker 5 I'm going to be the first person to say it. So when the discussion eventually happens, I was there before all you guys.
Yes.

Speaker 5 I'm going to have to wait another probably five or six years for that to come true.

Speaker 1 I deserve a little criticism, too, because I owe Stanford Steve $1,600 if they go to the Final Four because I did make that bet with him. But Tom Izzo delivered again.

Speaker 1 He's been to the tournament 25 straight years. This is his 15th Sweet 16.
He also broke the record today 16 times. He has won as an underseeded team, which is pretty crazy to think about that.

Speaker 5 Like, he just breaks every bracket maybe he's mr bracket breaker he might be that's really what it is i i saw i saw izzo smiling during a game today and just completely animated with positive energy and you know what i love about izzo is even when he's like screaming at his players and you can ask most of his former players and they'll be like yeah he coaches us hard but that's kind of a test for us if you can handle being coached by him it makes you better so he'll like he'll break his players down during games he gets mad he holds people accountable and then right after the game's over he snaps the second Jamie Erdoff starts interviewing him.

Speaker 5 Yeah. And he just turns into like a grandpa cracking jokes with her immediately.
Yeah. It completely changes.
But yeah,

Speaker 5 this is Tom Izzo being Tom Izzo. Why are we surprised anymore when Tom Izzo does this in March?

Speaker 1 He has

Speaker 1 more Sweet 16s than all but 17 programs. So 17 programs in NCAA basketball.
He has more than everyone else.

Speaker 1 And then he has more Sweet 16s than 10 of the 12 teams in the Big Ten. So Indiana and Michigan are the only programs that have more Sweet 16s than Tom Izzo as a person.
It's pretty crazy.

Speaker 1 I do think we probably underrate him. I know that he has to get that second title to get into that rarefied air because second title is really where, you know what I mean?

Speaker 1 Like it just, you look at the list of guys who won one title. There's a lot of guys.
Then you get to second. It's a laundry list of the best coaches in the game.

Speaker 1 Not saying he's not one of them, but second would make his resume unassailable.

Speaker 5 The real question becomes: better or worse coach than Caliperi.

Speaker 1 Well, so Cali Perry, he's got, certainly, he has more than one title. He only has one.

Speaker 1 And this is going to suck for Kentucky fans because they not only lost to K-State today, but

Speaker 1 we got into the conversation that if Cal Papery had won that 2015 title where Wisconsin beat him in the final four and he had done it as an undefeated team, he would be like untouchable in his entire resume.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he would be an undefeated team, two national titles.

Speaker 5 All-time great.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 All-time great. But it's funny you bring him up because I just was, I was like curious because I think what Tomizo does better than any other coach,

Speaker 1 it's the quick turnaround. So I think it was only four times in the tournament has he only won one, exactly one game.

Speaker 1 He basically either gets bounced right away or he gets the sweet 16. There's kind of no middle ground.
He's so good at the turnaround coaching.

Speaker 1 And he also just coaches teams that maybe don't have the top-end talent that everyone else has. The Blue Bloods have.
I looked it up. Michigan State in Tom Izzo's time has four lottery picks.

Speaker 1 So Jaron Jackson, Miles Bridges, Denzel Valentine, shout out to Bulls for that pick, and Jason Richardson. In that same time, Duke has 25 lottery picks.

Speaker 1 Cal at Kentucky, which is only going back to 2009, so this is Izzo 1995.

Speaker 1 So it's like double the years Izzo. Cal has 22.

Speaker 1 Kansas with Bill Self since 2003 has 13. And UNC with Roy since 2003 has 12.
So it's pretty crazy how many of these schools have these top-end elite NBA talent. And Tom Izzo doesn't have that.

Speaker 1 And he's just putting together a resume every single March.

Speaker 5 Yeah, 24 and 7 on games with one day rest per ESP. That's coaching.
Mike Greenberg. That's coaching.
It's coaching. He's a great coach.
No one ever said that he was a bad coach.

Speaker 5 I've never said that Tom Island was a bad coach. Never said that.
I just said that someday somebody will say that he's overrated, and I just wanted to beat that person to the punch.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay, so Mr. March advances.
Kentucky loses. That was tough.

Speaker 1 Sean Miller and Xavier back to the Sweet 16.

Speaker 1 I was looking it up. Archie Miller really doesn't get enough credit for being like the dumb-dun brother because his resume versus brothers sucks.

Speaker 1 It sucks for him.

Speaker 5 So Sean Miller,

Speaker 5 he's going to get another job soon, right? Like, he's going to.

Speaker 13 I don't know.

Speaker 5 Do you think he's going to stay at Xavier?

Speaker 1 Because that's where he started. You know what I mean? Like, he went Xavier and then he went, obviously, to Arizona.

Speaker 1 And maybe it's one of those things where it's like, hey, I got a good gig here, play in a power conference.

Speaker 5 He probably is psyched to not be out in that Arizona heat all the time, sweating.

Speaker 1 Yeah, sweating his balls off. I don't know.
That might be one of those situations where he's like,

Speaker 1 this is home. I'm good.
Like, you know, because

Speaker 1 the expectations are clearly different at Xavier, and he exceeds them every time. Yep.

Speaker 1 People are going to get mad. I keep saying Xavier.

Speaker 10 Xavier. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Xavier.

Speaker 5 Xavier. But yeah,

Speaker 1 he was at Xavier from early 2000s, went to Arizona for a long time. Obviously, it didn't end great.
And now he's back at Xavier. Like, why not just be there?

Speaker 5 Those Xavier teams from the early 2000s were fun to watch. Yeah.
They were good basketball teams. So they played against Pittsburgh today, who wore their black jerseys again, their first loss.

Speaker 1 Where Sean Miller played.

Speaker 5 Wearing the black jerseys. Yep.
And it's so funny when they put them on because they're just trying to look like the basketball version of the Steelers. Yep.
Which I love.

Speaker 5 It's like, we'll break these out when we, we'll play Renegade. Yeah.
And then that way, people from Pittsburgh will pay.

Speaker 5 That's really, if you want to get, if you want to do numbers in Pittsburgh, just have black and yellow be your team colors for any sport.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 5 now you're the basketball Steelers.

Speaker 1 It's the greatest thing any city's ever done.

Speaker 1 I've said it before, but like when the Pirates suck or the Penguins suck, the fans of Pittsburgh can sit there like in the middle of July and just look out on the field and be like, Stillers.

Speaker 1 Stillers coming. Like, I'm just like

Speaker 5 thinking about the Stillers.

Speaker 1 That's all you can do. Like, it's a genius, genius thing they've done.

Speaker 5 They're probably pumped to have the Pirates suck to a certain extent because it's just like, well, you know what?

Speaker 5 We don't have to waste our time and mental energy focusing on a sport and a team that's not the Steelers.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's like the Homer Simpson, like Bart, girl Bart. Yeah.

Speaker 1 The Pittsburgh just has like baseball Stillers, hockey Stillers, basketball Stillers. It's good.

Speaker 1 They're all the Steelers.

Speaker 5 Yeah, or was was it Stob that was saying, like,

Speaker 5 that's White Lamar? Yeah, right.

Speaker 1 That's Short Lamb. Yeah, you could just look at it.
It's just like, it's Steelers. It's everything you see in Pittsburgh, which is smart because that's the team.

Speaker 5 Even their bridges are Steelers. Yeah.

Speaker 5 They're like Steelers. I'm convinced that they painted the bridges after they had the football team.

Speaker 1 I mean, the majority of people in Pittsburgh just drive around all the time. Just in their brain, they're just like Steelers, Stillers, Steelers, Steelers.

Speaker 1 All the time, which that's a great life to have.

Speaker 5 Yeah, honestly, respect. I wish I could do that.

Speaker 1 So much respect.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 1 The ucon ucon looks good danny hurley versus musk in the second round's gonna oh hank's going to puke again oh hank are you going no he looks he looks he looks so white number one so white he's good he might do number three he just poke and puke at the same time he might take a screenshot do you think this is soft by hank max

Speaker 1 uh i just hope he doesn't have a stomach bug and get it gets us sick oh geez i don't believe strong stomach bugs i'm stronger than that i'm way stronger than that stomach bugs are so bad yeah but you can't catch a stomach bug from somebody unless you eat their puke.

Speaker 5 I feel like that's the easiest thing to catch from somebody.

Speaker 1 No. PFT is right.
I've gotten three stomach bugs in my life. It's all because I ate someone else's puke.
Yep.

Speaker 5 Like a dog. I mistook it for my own.

Speaker 1 One time I had a lick of poop, but that was it. That was fine.
I've never. I was diarrhea.

Speaker 5 I can't remember the last time I caught a stomach bug.

Speaker 1 I'll get

Speaker 1 such a bad segment. No, no, no.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 Listen, I'll catch a cold. We're not going to have a show on Wednesday.
I'll catch a cold.

Speaker 5 I'll catch a cough. I'll get a fever sometimes.
I don't remember the last little herpie. I started pushing.

Speaker 1 Here and there.

Speaker 5 I think I'm clean on that, actually.

Speaker 1 Yeah, nobody catch one. Yeah, somehow it's true.
It happens.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Hank. God damn.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Danny Hurley versus Musk is going to be awesome.

Speaker 5 UConn looks awesome.

Speaker 1 Second half, UConn.

Speaker 5 UConn sleeper national title team right now.

Speaker 1 I have three futures in the Sweet 16. My mystery team has been eliminated.
People did figure it out.

Speaker 1 It was Kentucky because remember I promised Harvey Harvey when we were on Kentucky Sports Radio, if Kentucky won, I'd split it with him.

Speaker 1 Harvey, if you're listening to this, you would have had $100,000 because I got him at 55 to 1. So that sucks for you.
But yeah, UConn looks good.

Speaker 1 Creighton looked good. There was a lot of good games.
And then we had

Speaker 1 FDU fall short. They fucking fought so goddamn hard.

Speaker 1 It was...

Speaker 1 I love those kids.

Speaker 5 I love those kids. We should talk a little bit about Kansas State.

Speaker 1 Yeah, no, Kansas State. Ima.
Yeah, no,

Speaker 1 Kansas State's purple. The lavender pops.

Speaker 5 It's beautiful. It's a thing of beauty.
And they have my favorite player of the tournament. Yes.
And Mikkel Noel.

Speaker 1 That just bombed. That kid is awesome.

Speaker 5 That kid is so much fun to watch. Not only does he bomb, he crosses people up.
He's maybe the best passer in the tournament also. He's throwing like behind his head alley oops to people on a dime.

Speaker 5 This kid is insane to watch. I fucking love watching him play.
I hope they keep winning because, again, that's another short king. The short kings are the, they are the market inefficiency right now.

Speaker 5 And Kansas State, as an institution, they should just market entirely to short kings. Yes.
Because what's his name? Deuce Vaughan? Yep. They're running back, 5'5 ⁇ .
Yep.

Speaker 5 And then Darren Sprolls, he's probably 5'5 ⁇ , 5'6. They're the official.

Speaker 1 This is older Deuce Vaughn.

Speaker 5 Yeah, older Deuce Vaughn. They're the official college of short people.
Yes. Respect.
Or actually, technically, perfectly average because I think he's 5'9 ⁇ . I think Noel is 5'9, right?

Speaker 1 Yeah, but it was a very tight game. Ostro Shibwe had, I think, 18 rebounds.

Speaker 1 Everyone knew going into that game, Kansas State can't do anything about his rebounding, and they just couldn't all game.

Speaker 5 I'm going to miss him in college basketball.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we might have one more year.

Speaker 1 I'll let you know when I go to Keeneland and I see him at Jeff Ruby's. I'm like, oh, you're back again? He's like, it's actually my third year.
Yeah. So, but yeah, Noel, that game was so tight.

Speaker 1 And then at the end of the game, he's just like, yeah, I'm going to win this game. And I'm just going to start bombing.

Speaker 1 And in a tournament that has been the worst shooting tournament ever, it was something, it's basically shifted how our eyes work, where if a player hits a perfect three swish, it's like the most, it like brought tears to my eyes when he started hitting him.

Speaker 1 I was like, I've never seen shots go in before.

Speaker 5 Yeah, and also shout out Willie the Wildcat, Kansas State's mascot.

Speaker 5 A lot of people saw him and they're like, whoa, what happened to the rest of his body? No, that's what Willie does. In football season, he wears pads because that's what the players

Speaker 5 wear. And then in basketball season, he just wears a jersey and he's got his human arms and human legs sticking out to the side.

Speaker 5 Yes, so I went on a deep dive and started watching a bunch of Willie the Wildcat videos from football season.

Speaker 5 Before every game, he used to just they used to dress one of their like drill team guys or dance team guys up as the mascot from the opponent's team. Okay.

Speaker 5 And then Willie would just lay him out like jackboxing style at midfield. And they had to stop doing it because he gave a kid a seizure because he hit him so hard.
Fuck yes. But that's Willie, baby.

Speaker 1 Shout out Willie. Also, Kansas State's got a little touch of team of Destiny because they have Keontae Johnson, remember, who collapsed for Florida last year.
Yep. And it was a very scary situation.

Speaker 1 He's now on Kansas State. Maybe a little like that will be a story that people write about if they make it to the Final Four.
Was that last year or two years ago?

Speaker 1 It might have been two years ago, but yeah, it was bad.

Speaker 5 Yeah, I think it was 2020. Yeah,

Speaker 1 that was a very scary situation. But yeah, he is on Kansas State and he's a very good player.
And they might have that team of destiny. Who knows?

Speaker 5 I'm rooting for him.

Speaker 1 Who knows? Yeah. I'm rooting for Keontae Johnson, too.

Speaker 1 Okay, so let's see. Wait, was it? No, it was last year, I think.
Because he only played one game last year.

Speaker 1 COVID years all blend together. We don't really understand

Speaker 5 how time happened the last, yeah, three years.

Speaker 1 Oh, no, it was

Speaker 1 2020. Yeah, it's two years ago.
That's two years ago. Two seasons ago.

Speaker 1 Yeah, two seasons ago. Damn.
Time doesn't.

Speaker 5 So wait, this might be a...

Speaker 5 This might be a clone, Keontae Johnson.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Billy?

Speaker 9 It was actually before the vaccine even existed.

Speaker 1 Oh, so you can't blame it on the vaccine?

Speaker 5 Or maybe they, maybe it was an experimental vaccine they gave him.

Speaker 1 Okay. Oh, Hank's back.

Speaker 5 Hey, oh, you do look.

Speaker 1 You look so white.

Speaker 5 You look weird.

Speaker 1 You look so weird.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I don't know. I think we're gonna.
Did you puke again? Yeah. The rice.
Did you save any that we could eat?

Speaker 3 I mean, that's some in the trash.

Speaker 1 Okay. You puked in the trash? You couldn't make it to the bathroom? No.
Oh, my God.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I just got like hot, hot sweats, hot flashes.

Speaker 5 You look like you got jaundice going on right now.

Speaker 3 I feel good. There is something about like when you just feel it, it feels better.
Well, no,

Speaker 3 I was feeling weird. And then I just like, I don't know.

Speaker 5 I'm sweating, though. What you eat?

Speaker 3 I had a burrito with spicy rice.

Speaker 1 Oh, no.

Speaker 5 Wait, the rice was spicy or the sauce?

Speaker 1 The rice was spicy? And the burrito was not spicy.

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 3 I mean, I don't know what type of rice it was, but.

Speaker 1 Hank, does it have anything to do with the fact that the Celtics are in third place now?

Speaker 3 Yeah, that's a mathematical anomaly.

Speaker 2 That's an interesting thing for you to bring up.

Speaker 1 I think you're talking about that.

Speaker 5 Hank, those are two words I never thought I'd hear you saying.

Speaker 1 A mathematical anomaly?

Speaker 1 Okay, go ahead.

Speaker 5 First of all, can you explain to me what a mathematical anomaly is?

Speaker 3 It's just something that doesn't make sense. The numbers don't add up.

Speaker 3 X plus Y doesn't equal Z for some reason.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 But the Celtics.

Speaker 5 Wait, wait, those are letters you just said.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I know. You know, math though.

Speaker 1 Math. Seven.
Seven. Okay, yeah, exactly.

Speaker 3 They have a better record than they have the tiebreaker, so the third-place thing doesn't make a lot of sense.

Speaker 1 The Celtics have a better record than the Sixers?

Speaker 5 What do you mean, better record?

Speaker 1 But then why are they above them

Speaker 1 outstanding?

Speaker 5 They have one more loss than the Sixers. Oh, that's

Speaker 1 better record.

Speaker 5 Their win percentage is lower than the Sixers.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so if you have one more loss, that's not a better record. Yeah, but if the Sixers win all the rest of their games,

Speaker 1 the Sixers are the two-seat.

Speaker 1 They control their own destiny.

Speaker 5 Now, I'm not a world-renowned educated person, but but

Speaker 5 maybe, Billy, you could tell me which of these two numbers is higher: 686

Speaker 5 or 681.

Speaker 9 686 is higher.

Speaker 5 Okay, mystery team, that was the Sixers.

Speaker 1 I have one, Billy. Okay.
Okay. I'm going to stat off.

Speaker 3 Which one's higher? 49 or 48?

Speaker 5 49 is higher. Okay, I'm going to counter that with another mystery stat.
Which one is higher, 22 or 23? 23.

Speaker 1 So that was something losses. That means that the are basically even.
I think there's something. The loss column is going to be a lot of fun.

Speaker 5 Well, you guys have a win streak, right? You guys have won Astros.

Speaker 3 No, because that's the thing.

Speaker 3 What you're saying, if both of you...

Speaker 1 Oh, no, that's a six streak. You have literally no color in your face right now.

Speaker 1 I'm struggling. I'm fighting through adversity right now.

Speaker 5 You're doing translucent face.

Speaker 1 What I'm saying, though, you look like a ghost.

Speaker 3 Let me see how, yeah.

Speaker 1 I mean, he looks like a ghost.

Speaker 1 That's a rough. You look like a bird.

Speaker 3 I don't know if you guys were cutting to me earlier, but I was like internally just like, what is going on?

Speaker 1 Well, you hobbled off to to go puke. Yeah, it was bad.

Speaker 3 What you're saying doesn't make sense, though, because if the Celtics win the rest of their games and the Sixers win the rest of their games, the Celtics have the tiebreaker.

Speaker 1 No, no, no, you don't understand.

Speaker 1 The Sixers will have more wins.

Speaker 5 Yeah, because the Celtics

Speaker 1 played more. Yeah, they will.

Speaker 5 Yes, because, Hank, the Sixers, factor fiction, I'll put it in terms you can understand.

Speaker 5 Factor fiction, if the Sixers win the rest of their games, that means that they would have no more losses, right?

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 5 22 losses. Okay, so fact or fiction, if the Celtics win the rest of their games, they will also have no more losses.
That would mean, that's a fact.

Speaker 5 That would mean that the Celtics would have one more loss on the season than the Sixers would.

Speaker 1 You go off the loss column, not the win column.

Speaker 1 All right, fine.

Speaker 1 Max, any response to that?

Speaker 2 No, I mean,

Speaker 2 NBA or Bill Simmons said that the Sixers are looking forward to seeing the Celtics in the playoffs, which definitely won't come back to bite them.

Speaker 1 Oh, no.

Speaker 2 But I think that Simmons just making up false reports.

Speaker 5 I don't think he would do that.

Speaker 3 Celtics are going through it, though. They're not playing well.
Jason Tatum's specifically not playing well. It's just tough, you know, coaching change, trying to live up to championships.

Speaker 1 You've had the same coach all year.

Speaker 3 No, I know, but I'm saying, you know, obviously you compared this season to last season. The last season they made a championship run.
It's just, you know, higher standards.

Speaker 5 And now Brad Stevens might be going to Purdue.

Speaker 3 I don't think that's happened.

Speaker 5 Things are falling apart.

Speaker 1 Rico Bosco did report that's the first call they have to make.

Speaker 3 I think, yeah. I mean, you call Brad Stevens all the time.

Speaker 3 Everyone should.

Speaker 5 Everyone should. Everyone should call Brad Stevens.

Speaker 1 If you have an opening in middle school basketball, Brad Stevens should be your first call.

Speaker 5 Make him say no to you.

Speaker 1 Imagine if you got a call for every coach opening ever. He should.
Brad Stevens. All right.
Other games from

Speaker 1 Sunday.

Speaker 1 Yeah, FDU. They tried really hard.
That was an exciting.

Speaker 1 They fought to the end.

Speaker 1 You can lose. When you lose, like St.
Peter's lost to UNC last year, you're like, all right, the Cinderella run had to end. FDU lost fighting to the very end.

Speaker 1 And they almost, they were winning that game with like four minutes left. They went out like champs.

Speaker 5 They missed a lot of open shots. They missed some open threes.
They probably wish they had back. They missed some layups they wish that they had back.
We should credit FAU. John L.

Speaker 5 Davis had 25 points, 10 rebounds, 5 assists, 5 steals.

Speaker 5 First time in NCAA tournament that anybody's ever had that style. That's pretty cool.
So pretty good game for him.

Speaker 5 And FAU, I've said at least once on this show, if I had to do college all over again, knowing what I know now, I think I would go to FAU. FAU.

Speaker 5 Because of the campus, where it's at, you're in Boca Raton.

Speaker 5 Your perspective changes a little bit, and you realize what would be the most fun college experience.

Speaker 5 It would either be go to a big state school that has massive football and basketball programs or just go live in Boca for four years and have the time of your life.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and Dusty May is just a great name. Made-up name.
Totally, totally his. That's his stripper name.

Speaker 5 Sounds like a wrestler.

Speaker 1 There's no way. There's no way.

Speaker 5 But stripper wrestler.

Speaker 1 Yeah, there's no way that's his real name.

Speaker 5 Yeah, or an old, like, grandma porn star. Yeah.
Dusty May. But it's M-A-E.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we're now combining, yeah, every, basically every name. Dusty Rhodes, and then.
Yeah, he's a stripper porn star old person. Yep.
Fake name, though. Miami, shout out Miami.

Speaker 1 Coach L gets them to the Sweet 16. Indiana really had a moment here where they could have just taken, like,

Speaker 1 they beat Purdue twice this year.

Speaker 1 Purdue loses to a 16 seed.

Speaker 1 If Indiana had gotten to the Sweet 16 and they could have talked for an entire week about how they went to the Sweet 16 as a four seed and Purdue lost in the first round as a one seed, that would have been nice for them.

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 5 Indiana still, they like to think that they're back or on the precipice of being back all the time. And if they had gone to a Sweet 16, then you can make the case Indiana basketball is back.

Speaker 5 They are the only blue blood team that I think doesn't have the color blue in their scheme, right? Going through the list in my head, I think that they are.

Speaker 1 Yeah, UNC,

Speaker 1 Duke, UCLA.

Speaker 3 Michigan State now.

Speaker 1 They're not a blue blood. Bill Nova.

Speaker 5 Although, I think if Izzo wins a second championship, I think that I think Michigan State could take the blue blood mantle away from Indiana.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 5 If they have a perfect season. Next coach have a perfect season, they inherit Indiana's blue bloodness.

Speaker 1 I also hope Trace Jackson Davis, I don't think he has, he might have a year left. I think he has a year left.

Speaker 1 He's like 23, but I hope he stays because that's a fun, he's a fun college basketball player.

Speaker 5 Yeah, there was one player on Memphis who's 26 years old.

Speaker 1 Yeah, 26.

Speaker 5 He's older than Joe Burrow is.

Speaker 1 That's illegal.

Speaker 5 And he had four fouls with 13 minutes left in the game, or it was more than that. Penny Hardaway put him back in with 13 minutes left in the game.
All-time ballsy move by Penny.

Speaker 5 I was upset that

Speaker 5 Memphis lost.

Speaker 5 They're a fun team to watch.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And then Gonzaga ended the night with a win, comeback win against TCU.
Gonzaga still got it. Drew Timmy going for, he has another year, which is crazy.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 He does actually have another year, and he said he's not coming back.

Speaker 5 He could transfer.

Speaker 1 He could transfer.

Speaker 1 I don't understand why players, like, if you have another year and you're really good and you're in a smaller school, why wouldn't you just transfer to like UNC or something?

Speaker 5 I think Drew, that'd be amazing if Drew Timmy transferred to a big state school. Right.

Speaker 1 Like, if I let all the Timmy go there or go to Notre Dame, alumni will take care of you for the rest of your life. That's what they always say.
Yeah. I'd transfer to an 80-year degree.

Speaker 5 I would transfer to FAU.

Speaker 9 Yeah. And just hang out on the beach.

Speaker 1 And just get to the tournament there. Or Hawaii.

Speaker 5 Toledo. Why don't more players just go to college in Hawaii?

Speaker 9 That's a good question. Low-key heard it sucks.
I actually had this conversation over the weekend.

Speaker 1 The state or the university.

Speaker 5 Philly heard Hawaii sucks.

Speaker 1 Oh, because the state is awesome. Yeah.
It's great.

Speaker 9 But heard the university sucks. What about it?

Speaker 5 If you're not from Hawaii, they don't fuck with you.

Speaker 1 Ah, God. But if you're really sick at sports, they probably do fuck with you.
That's kind of the equalizer in life.

Speaker 5 I mean, Colt Brennan seemed to really enjoy Hawaii so much that he got the state of Hawaii died into the side of his head.

Speaker 1 Isn't he Hawaiian?

Speaker 5 No. I don't think he was.
No.

Speaker 1 I think he's also passed away.

Speaker 5 So RIP, Colt Brennan.

Speaker 1 Yeah, R.I.P. Thoughts and prayers.
Jake will probably use his thoughts and prayers for someone who stubbed their toe ordering. Oh, he's from California.
Yeah. That's Hawaii, Jason.

Speaker 1 But if you're good at sports, it equalizes everything at life. True.
Everyone likes the dude who's good at sports. Yeah.
So, Drew Timmy, go to Hawaii.

Speaker 5 Why not? I would. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Just have an awesome time. Maybe get some NIL shit.

Speaker 5 Can you transfer mid-season?

Speaker 1 I don't think so. I don't think you can play.

Speaker 1 You can. You can like.

Speaker 5 Yeah, so okay, so I would go to FAU.

Speaker 1 No, I would go to Hawaii.

Speaker 5 Wait. I go to FAU, play there, and then transfer to Hawaii for for like the last two months of my collegiate career.
Yeah, I like that. Just get my degree there.

Speaker 1 So we have our Sweet 16.

Speaker 1 Awesome games. I'm very excited for this.

Speaker 1 It is the worst four days in the four, three and a half days in the sports calendar because you wake up on Monday and you're like, what's life without being able to watch basketball all day?

Speaker 5 Oh, I'm sad that Jake's not here right now because I have something pretty wild.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah?

Speaker 5 I got a wild stat coming up. Give it to us.
Tennessee FAU. They're playing Thursday at the Mecca at MSG yep

Speaker 5 the two athletic directors of these two schools they're brothers what how wild is that that is wild they're they're white brothers which when I first saw that written out I was a little bit confused as to what that meant like is this a Rachel last name white is it a Dolezal situation yeah yeah they're they're they're what uh Danny and Brian White yeah athletic directors wow that's wild they got to have a bet their mom has to be like wearing the double like a suit breast with two different colors on it.

Speaker 5 Like the Kelsey.

Speaker 1 Yeah, fuck. They should send each other a transfer.

Speaker 5 Yeah, oh, I like that.

Speaker 1 Or no, the winner gets better. And the winner gets the best player.
Yeah.

Speaker 5 Oh, dude, FAU, yeah. That'd be sick.
We already know he can throw an orange 106 yards. Yeah.

Speaker 1 If Tennessee loses,

Speaker 1 FAU gets Joe Milton. If Tennessee wins, Tennessee gets Lane Kiffen's recruiting tactics that he probably left behind.
His book.

Speaker 5 Wait, they both had Lane Kiffin experience.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's true, but the updated one. Okay, the good one.
Yeah, the good one. The one

Speaker 1 that's getting old missed going. Got it.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 3 New Beyond Raw Lid V2.

Speaker 1 GNC's number one pre-workout.

Speaker 3 Now with harder-hitting energy, an intense mind-body connection.

Speaker 3 And enhanced endurance support.

Speaker 1 This isn't just a pre-workout, it's precision engineering for your body.

Speaker 1 Supercharge your workout with new Beyond Raw Lit V2. Available now at GNC and GNC.com.

Speaker 1 And Billy, we weren't with you all weekend.

Speaker 1 What did you think about the tournament?

Speaker 9 It was a hell of a time to bet major underdogs. Yeah.
Because they all fucking hit. And like, it was wild.

Speaker 1 I mean... This is just assault on PFT.
It is.

Speaker 9 I know, like, I bet against Purdue just, like, as a joke.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 bit.

Speaker 9 It was like plus $1,200.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I bet.

Speaker 5 Yeah. I bet on Purdue as a bit.
Yeah. And you bet against them as a bit.

Speaker 9 I mean, I paid my whole bar tab off of a $10 bet.

Speaker 1 It was insane. Really? Sick.
You bought round for the boys?

Speaker 9 Round for the boys.

Speaker 1 Okay, what else?

Speaker 5 How much was your bar tab?

Speaker 1 Like 100 bucks.

Speaker 5 That's like when your doctor asks you how much you drink and you have to do a second to do the lie math. Yeah.

Speaker 1 How was St. Patrick's today?

Speaker 5 It was sick. Yeah.

Speaker 9 And the games were awesome, watching it in the bars.

Speaker 1 So many great games. Yeah.

Speaker 9 It was going nuts.

Speaker 5 What'd you do on St. Patrick's Day?

Speaker 5 Drank.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.
Hell yeah. That rules.

Speaker 5 Are you still wearing your St. Patrick Day? Is that the shirt that you wore?

Speaker 9 I literally came straight from St. Patrick's Day here.

Speaker 1 It's

Speaker 1 Friday was St. Patrick's Day.
Yeah, but it's a whole weekend. It's March 20th.

Speaker 9 I came straight from the parade to here.

Speaker 5 You came straight from St. Patrick's Day.

Speaker 1 I literally were here.

Speaker 5 Weren't there celebrations here last weekend, too?

Speaker 9 Yeah. No, I was in South.
I went to South Station. Then I went to Penn Station.
Now I'm here.

Speaker 1 Oh, you're in Boston? Yeah. Oh, you were there today in Boston.
Yeah. So you literally did just come straight from St.
Patrick's Day.

Speaker 9 Straight from St.

Speaker 1 Patrick's Day.

Speaker 5 How many days was your St. Patrick's Day this weekend? Three.

Speaker 1 Okay, that's normal. Toned down.

Speaker 5 That was better than last year.

Speaker 1 Did you have any fights that you witnessed that you didn't get in? Nope. Nope.
Okay. Good.

Speaker 9 Didn't witness any crimes this weekend?

Speaker 5 Nice. That's a plus.

Speaker 1 Didn't commit any?

Speaker 5 It's a lie that you didn't witness any crimes.

Speaker 1 Because I could just imagine Billy.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Also, I just imagine Billy being like, I didn't witness any crimes.
He just robbed someone with his eyes closed. It's like, I didn't witness it.
Didn't happen.

Speaker 1 All right, so what else from the tournament?

Speaker 9 Princeton going on a run was awesome.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you respect them because of the education thing. Yeah, they're smart.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Like that whole FAU part, you were just sitting there like, but then you'd have a degree from FAU. Gross.

Speaker 1 You'd chill by the beach.

Speaker 9 It'd be chill. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 But then you'd have a degree from FAU.

Speaker 1 I mean, that's pretty good. Yeah.

Speaker 9 What's like, what's the degree at FAU?

Speaker 5 I think it's fine.

Speaker 1 You know,

Speaker 1 it doesn't matter. I'm going to let anybody in on a secret.

Speaker 5 It honestly doesn't matter. None of it matters.
And pretty soon it's not going to matter whether or not you even went to college.

Speaker 1 Facts.

Speaker 9 Yeah, college is kind of.

Speaker 1 Whoa, is this a change, Billy?

Speaker 9 No, I mean, like, honestly, thinking back on it, I probably didn't need to go to college.

Speaker 1 Yeah. The only thing college is good for.

Speaker 1 You could have been radicalized as an 18-year-old.

Speaker 5 Going to college is good.

Speaker 10 It's good to just get out of your house for a while.

Speaker 5 And it's like a halfway home to becoming an adult.

Speaker 9 I guess it's, yeah.

Speaker 1 Billy is like the Goodwill Hunting, where he's like, someday you'll wake up and you learn you could have learned all that from TikTok. Yeah, exactly.
That's where I got my degree.

Speaker 1 All right, what else?

Speaker 9 It was dope.

Speaker 1 That was it. All right.

Speaker 1 We put a quote card for Billy there. Ed Simbilly Tournament Recap.
It was dope.

Speaker 9 I mean, just like, it was like such a great time for parlays, just like chalky-ass parlays.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 5 Wait, no, not chalky ass parlays. You just, you started this whole thing out by saying that you bet all the underdogs.

Speaker 9 Well, I bet all the underdogs, and then I just put like parlays together with just like all the easy picks.

Speaker 1 Oh, except Purdue. Sounds like you kind of picked up Vegas.

Speaker 9 It was like the mid-picks. It was really fun.

Speaker 9 I haven't actually gotten into gambling on March Madness until this year, like really hard, and it was awesome.

Speaker 5 What's your system? Because it sounds like

Speaker 5 it sounds like you picked all the underdogs, but then you also parlayed all the favorites, all the overdogs that won.

Speaker 9 Exactly. Yeah, you're a genius.
So at some point, so like, for example, I had Purdue in a parlay, but I also had, and it just all worked out.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 5 Oh, you bet both sides. He broke Vegas.

Speaker 9 I always beat Vegas.

Speaker 9 We figured this out last year.

Speaker 1 If you bet both sides, you can't lose. Yep.
That's a fact. You cash tickets either way.

Speaker 5 Actually, that would be a sound investment strategy to just bet both sides of every single game and then end up losing what? You probably miss out on what? 10%? Yeah. You'd lose 10% every bet.

Speaker 1 Listen, better than Norman.

Speaker 1 I've hit the all-button at the racetrack before. Sometimes you've got to see one go through the hoop.

Speaker 9 No, but if you put $10 on Furman and then $10 on a parlay that includes Purdue, Virginia, yeah, one's going to

Speaker 1 go up. Bringing down the house.

Speaker 5 Billy football. Billy, you're breaking my brain right now because

Speaker 5 if you bet on Furman. This is the entire spreadsheet thing.

Speaker 1 But then you bet

Speaker 1 you're not sure.

Speaker 5 If then you bet on Purdue

Speaker 5 in a parlay with other people. You're not guaranteed that one of those two is going to win.

Speaker 1 Yes, you are. No, you are.

Speaker 5 No, because Furman played UVA and Purdue played against FDU.

Speaker 9 That's what I meant. You put it on FDU and you put it on.

Speaker 1 Got it. Okay, yeah.
All right.

Speaker 5 I'm sorry that I doubted you.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Billy, we should also... Rogers.

Speaker 9 Yeah, dude, fucking awesome, right?

Speaker 1 Yeah. That's awesome.
Very awesome.

Speaker 9 Kind of worried, though, because it's not like official.

Speaker 5 Yeah. There's like a leverage situation.
It's mainly.

Speaker 9 He says he's coming.

Speaker 5 He probably shouldn't have gone on national YouTube and said that out loud.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 they got to figure it out. Yeah, no, he's

Speaker 1 going to be there.

Speaker 9 And then he like bodied Schefter.

Speaker 9 I mean, he's coming out swinging. I mean, this is either like, this isn't going to go down

Speaker 9 in Jersey like fucking.

Speaker 9 It's going to be really, really bad or it's going to be really, really awesome.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 if you ever thought what it would be like to interview someone coming straight from St. Patrick's Day, I'd say it's going great.

Speaker 9 It's going to be like the Hindenburg.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 9 Another New Jersey crash or it's going to be like awesome.

Speaker 1 Or Tony Soprano.

Speaker 5 Yeah. Or a great blimp flight, uneventful.
Yeah. Yeah.
The good year. It's either going to be a good year or the Hindenburg.
Exactly. Bam.

Speaker 1 Clip talk. There we go.
No.

Speaker 5 Don't say boom.

Speaker 1 Oh, my God. What is this? Stingray Steve.

Speaker 1 That? No, I don't want the Hindenburg. I got to play that back.
That's a classic.

Speaker 5 When we had Stingray Steve narrating national tragedies,

Speaker 1 and he goes, and all right, here we go. And it's the Hindenburg.
Oh, no, the humanity. Look at all the humanity.
Oh, man.

Speaker 1 That was a classic. Throwback.

Speaker 1 Okay. Should we do who's back? And then we have a Monday reading as well.
So, Piazza, you got a couple ads and we'll do who's back.

Speaker 14 All protein bars generally taste the same, but not one bars.

Speaker 7 One-made protein bars are actually delicious with Reese's and Hershey's.

Speaker 14 Only one Reese's Peanut Butter Lover's protein bar is made with Reese's peanut butter, and only one Hershey's cookies and cream protein bars is made with Hershey's cookie bits while delivering 18 grams of protein and 3 grams of sugar.

Speaker 14 One bars are the perfect protein bar to get you through your busy day, whether you need a quick pick-me-up between meetings or you need some fuel to power you through your next workout.

Speaker 14 One also has other delicious flavors like birthday cake, maple glazed donut, and blueberry cobbler. Find all One Bars at a retailer near you or on Amazon.com.

Speaker 13 Experian is your big financial friend, helping you find ways to save, manage your credit, and apply for cards labeled No Ding Decline.

Speaker 1 No approval?

Speaker 13 No ding. Download the Experian app today.
Disclaimer, Applying for no ding decline cards won't hurt your credit scores if you aren't initially approved.

Speaker 13 Initial approval will result in a hard inquiry, which will impact your credit scores.

Speaker 1 Experian!

Speaker 1 Okay, who's back of the week? Hank. USA.
Yes. Yes.

Speaker 5 Yeah, we love the World Baseball Classic.

Speaker 1 World Baseball Classic.

Speaker 3 We're going to the championship. There was an electric game on Saturday night.
Trey Turner had a walk, not a walk-off, but a go-ahead grand slam in the eighth inning.

Speaker 3 Said it was the loudest crowd he's ever witnessed

Speaker 3 as a player and the best hit in his career.

Speaker 5 I'd like to point out that when he won that World Series for the Nationals, all four of our wins were on the road in Houston. So, of course, it wouldn't have been that loud.

Speaker 5 For the record.

Speaker 1 But you were leading in games at home.

Speaker 5 I don't think that we were.

Speaker 1 Ever?

Speaker 5 We got smoked in most of those games. Okay.

Speaker 3 Playing the winner of Japan versus Mexico tonight. So if Japan wins, it'll be Shohei.

Speaker 3 And that will be unbelievable.

Speaker 3 There was some, so people were putting up stats talking, you know, comparing the World Baseball Classic to regular baseball and kind of pointing out how bad baseball is at promoting and social media and all that.

Speaker 3 The Trey Turner had 7 million views in 15 hours.

Speaker 3 Shohei had a home run off the scoreboard earlier in the week that had 7.5 million views. Aaron Judge's 62nd home run had 2, 3 million views.
And

Speaker 3 Bryce Harbor game five NLCS home run had 2.5 million views.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we

Speaker 1 on Thursday we talked about Edwin Diaz, and my take was simply like, March Madness is going on. I'm not going to watch the World Baseball Classic, but if someone likes it, cool, good for them.

Speaker 1 Different strokes for different folks. Now that we're in the final, I'm fucking all in.

Speaker 5 Yeah, we've been very clear about our stance on this, which is if the U.S. starts to win and the flag starts to advance through the brackets, then we're like, yeah, fuck yeah, USA, let's do it.

Speaker 5 And also, the atmosphere does look incredible. Yeah.
It looks like a lot of fun at these baseball games. Yes.
So, yes, we are rooting for USA. I hope it's against Japan.
Yep. Just so I can

Speaker 5 empty the clip for more World War II jokes on the next podcast. So looking forward to that, hopefully.

Speaker 1 Okay, that's your who's back?

Speaker 5 Spanish-American jokes just don't hit the same.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 5 And Rick Patino.

Speaker 1 Yeah. He's a tech.

Speaker 1 PFT, your who's back?

Speaker 5 I've got two who's backs of the week. First is the women's tournament.
Women's tournament's back.

Speaker 5 I started out 4-0 gambling on women. They were calling me Mr.
Women. Then I went 0-2 today, unfortunately, because I got away from my system.

Speaker 5 I, much like Billy, have figured out a system to how to beat Vegas when it comes to the women's tournament. You just take all the good schools minus the points.
And it's super easy to do.

Speaker 5 So I got cute with it today. And I took Iowa, who's got the best player in the country, but they're not the best team necessarily.
And then I took,

Speaker 5 who do I take in my other one?

Speaker 1 Oh,

Speaker 5 USF. Took Took USF against South Carolina.
That was a mistake. But now I'm back, so my picks for tomorrow are going to be Tennessee minus 14 over Toledo.
Tennessee is a good school.

Speaker 5 UConn minus 15 over Baylor. Just take the biggest spreads.
The biggest spreads. Bet the favorite on the biggest spreads.
And my other who's back of the week is the Live Tour.

Speaker 5 The Live Tour had a massive weekend.

Speaker 5 My son Chris's A's is choked. He's been crying non-stop for the entire day about that.
They had a 0.14 rating.

Speaker 5 0.14 rating, which I think that means that the PGA,

Speaker 5 their event this week, had something like about 10 times the viewers that Live Golf had.

Speaker 5 So now the people that run Live Golf, they're saying already that they're going to start pulling the reins in on some of the spending in the next, I don't know, season.

Speaker 5 Do they call it seasons in Live Golf?

Speaker 5 So

Speaker 5 the fat times are over for the Live Tour because their ratings are so bad right now. They're not pulling it in on the CW.
I have a very simple way to solve this ratings issue.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 5 Execute the last place team every week.

Speaker 1 It would be down for it. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Relegation.

Speaker 5 Yeah. Yeah.
The ultimate relegation. Yeah.

Speaker 1 To the afterlife. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 5 I mean, or they don't have cuts, but they could chop your head off.

Speaker 1 Live tour is one of those things where

Speaker 1 we made probably too big of a deal of it because it's definitely not going to last.

Speaker 5 It actually ended up helping the PGA tour. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. A lot.
A lot. A lot, a lot.
And all these guys are going to come back, right?

Speaker 3 I think the good guys are going to come back. I think some of the other people are going to get fucked over.

Speaker 3 I don't think, I think if you're a borderline player, I guess they made a shitload of money. Yeah, if you're a borderline player, I don't think, like, if you're good enough, the PJ will take you back.

Speaker 3 But I think they're going to look a lot closer at the people that, you know, if they're not there, it won't matter.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I just imagine all the live tour golfers just being like, this is fine. This is totally fine.
I made the right choice.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we're totally going to up up, you know, upend the entire golf world.

Speaker 5 You think that's what it is? Because you're going to wear shorts. That's totally what it was about.
Golf, but louder.

Speaker 1 Yeah, golf. Grow the game.

Speaker 1 Okay, my who's back is the Wisconsin women's hockey team. National title.
Shout out the Lady Badgers.

Speaker 1 Dynasty. Three out of four.
Three out of four. Title Town.
That's good to see.

Speaker 5 And you're saying Madison is title town.

Speaker 1 Won our NIT game today, too. Yeah, Title Town.
So that's kind of going well.

Speaker 1 I don't know. Just kind of winning everything.
But yeah, shout out the women's hockey team. Awesome.
Beat Ohio State State 1-0.

Speaker 1 Real fun to win a game 1-0.

Speaker 1 Just shut them down.

Speaker 5 If you're a real puck boy like us,

Speaker 5 then you know that 1-0 games are the most beautiful.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so it felt good. Felt good to win one.

Speaker 1 Three out of four. That's pretty fucking cool.
Three out of four. Ohio State can.

Speaker 1 Don't be upset if you're a Buckeye fan. You actually won the one out of four.
So you were the only team that was able to stop Wisconsin last year when you won the title.

Speaker 1 But yeah, three out of four is a dynasty. And then my other who's back is Dylan Brooks just being a pest.
He is,

Speaker 1 it's hard to follow NBA while March Madness is going on. I don't really trust anyone who

Speaker 1 doesn't at least tune into some of the March Madness. Like it's just, it's the best tournament.
It's so much fun. But yeah, Dylan Brooks, I was seeing some highlights.

Speaker 1 He was just, he's an all-time pest, and he's just bothering the Warriors constantly. So he's back, and now the shit talking is back.
And it feels like

Speaker 1 if we can get Warriors, Grizzlies in the first round, it'd be great. And also shout out john morant for uh

Speaker 1 going to rehab for like 70 hours yeah no he cured his gun in a strip club addiction that he had yeah there's also pestering him for a while there was a funny tweet that was like um a reporter was like yeah john morant in his two or three days in rehab didn't play any basketball so he's gonna have to ramp back up probably forgot how to play basketball yeah i don't know i hope he remembers how to play basketball

Speaker 5 i mean and the toughest part is the relapse where if he gets back and he's not that good, you're going to fall back on old habits and you're going to be like,

Speaker 5 I need to have a gun in the strip club again.

Speaker 9 Do you think they weaned him off guns? Like, here's an air soft. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 It looks realistic. Nerf gun.

Speaker 5 You can't quit guns cold turkey.

Speaker 1 No, definitely not. But yeah, it was just funny to be like, yeah, he hasn't played any basketball, so he's going to need a little time to figure out how to be basketball.
What was it?

Speaker 1 Okay, here it is. Adrian Wojanowski.
Morant hasn't been playing basketball while at a counseling counseling center in Florida, so his ramp-up is expected to extend past

Speaker 1 Monday's game versus Dallas when he's first eligible to return.

Speaker 1 I'm hoping that he remembers how to play basketball.

Speaker 5 I hope it's not a 12-step program. Yeah.
That would be a travel.

Speaker 1 Well, no, they won't call it CNBA.

Speaker 5 What if they did

Speaker 5 over, what is it called, immersion therapy, where instead of smoking, you know, if you get caught smoking a cigarette by your dad, smoke a whole pack.

Speaker 1 That's what I said a couple weeks ago. Job Morant, they should just make him drive a tank everywhere.
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 5 This would suck. Or just like put him in, he has to just live in a strip club with all the guns.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah. No, just make him, yeah, make him fire off a nuke.
Yeah. How do you like this? This is what it leads to.
All right, Billy, your who's back.

Speaker 9 I was saving this part of the Aaron Rodgers news for the who's back, but I think Zach Wilson.

Speaker 9 Just hear me out.

Speaker 9 This is delusional.

Speaker 1 This is delusional. St.
Patrick's Day brain. This is delusional.

Speaker 9 But I have a feeling. Now, I know Aaron Rodgers doesn't have the longest history of

Speaker 9 mentoring people uh quarterbacks under him but i actually could see that he might be the one guy that's able to fix whatever the fuck's happening at zach wilson wow this is really going on i know didn't zach wilson say he's gonna make their life

Speaker 9 help i think that would have been like derek carr or like jimmy garoppos incredibly sad he's gonna make aaron rodgers life so not only is aaron rodgers gonna like help us win now but i think he could help build why quarterback of the future.

Speaker 5 Why do you think it's going to work between those two?

Speaker 9 I just think they I think they can figure it out. I think Aaron Rodgers is the one guy that Zach Wilson respects in the whole NFL and definitely is one of those games.

Speaker 1 Why just him?

Speaker 9 Because Aaron Rodgers,

Speaker 1 the mask thing? No, no. Oh.

Speaker 9 Aaron Rodgers.

Speaker 1 Flack has won just as many Super Bowls.

Speaker 1 Oh, good point. Excellent point, Hank.
That totally makes up for you not understanding the loss. People forget that.

Speaker 9 But in the quarterback world, Aaron Rodgers just has his whole

Speaker 9 base fundamentals and basically is hip mobility and flexibility.

Speaker 1 Oh, hey, Hank has a thought. Hank just got a thought.
Just

Speaker 1 struck his brain.

Speaker 9 The way Aaron Rodgers plays the game has totally changed a lot of quarterback fundamentals. And that's like sort of the school of thought that Zach Wilson came from.

Speaker 9 Like his quarterback guru, they talk about a lot of the stuff that Aaron Rodgers practices and preaches. And even Josh Allen, before Monday night game, they were getting into some of that.

Speaker 9 Like the way that Aaron Rodgers played the game has totally changed quarterback mechanics, especially. And just like the way Aaron Rodgers throws the ball is just so

Speaker 9 unique well you think by no but Zach Wilson doesn't but I think I think Aaron Rodgers and Zach Wilson being in the same quarterback room is going to actually help you're hurting yourself I just focus on at least at least they do ayahuasca

Speaker 1 at least they do ayahuasca together he's Mormon you won't do anything he can't do he can't drink regular

Speaker 9 he can't drink regular tea much less tea with DMT I think he might make him go like be a bad boy doing drugs okay and then Zach Wilson might get an edge to him start playing well totally erase all the bad interception games

Speaker 5 i'm just i just think it i think it could happen billy don't do just billy you have aaron rodgers be thankful for that i know but i think don't think this yourself could just like go so far i mean the xfl in three years yeah the xfl is not going to be around three years uh the celtics do control their own destiny because they play the sixers one more time but again if they played if they both won all their games Well, that's impossible.

Speaker 1 Right. Now, that is a wrinkle that you have just found out.

Speaker 3 But the Celtics control their own destiny because if they control the game against the Sixers, then they will.

Speaker 1 If either team wins out, they will have the higher C.

Speaker 5 So whoever wins.

Speaker 3 The Celtics control their own destiny.

Speaker 1 No, so do the Sixers.

Speaker 1 No, but yes. Yes.
Yes. Yes.

Speaker 3 Every team controls their own destiny.

Speaker 1 No, that's not true. Two teams control their own destinies.
The Rockets, if they win out, do not get to the playoffs. They don't control their own destiny.

Speaker 3 But if the Celtics and Sixers both win out, the Celtics would advance.

Speaker 3 But they can't win out, but it's all about if they play each other.

Speaker 1 They both control their own destiny.

Speaker 5 I think Hank Lowkey has discovered determinism.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 The Celtics have the better head-to-head record.

Speaker 1 If the Sixers win out,

Speaker 1 they are the second seed.

Speaker 3 But if the Celtics went out, they're the second seed.

Speaker 1 Correct.

Speaker 3 I think the Celtics have a better advantage.

Speaker 1 You know what?

Speaker 5 Hank has discovered a mathematical anomaly.

Speaker 1 How about that? You have.

Speaker 5 Two teams control their own destiny simultaneously.

Speaker 1 At the same time. But the Celtics have the head-to-head record.

Speaker 1 But again,

Speaker 1 go ahead, Max.

Speaker 2 The head-to-head does not mean anything right now. Like, I don't, like, the Sixers have the better record.
The head-to-head means nothing. And even with

Speaker 2 that game, it doesn't matter.

Speaker 3 It does matter.

Speaker 5 You guys should do a math podcast. It's fine.

Speaker 1 When do you guys play?

Speaker 5 Is it a percentage?

Speaker 1 April 4th. Wow.
All eyes on April 4th.

Speaker 2 I think the Sixers are home that game. Yep.

Speaker 1 Well, that doesn't matter, Max. You're going to lose that game.
We do lose to the Celtics often.

Speaker 1 You get a couple big games against the Bulls coming up, Max. Yeah,

Speaker 1 tonight. Yeah, back-to-back.
Back-to-back.

Speaker 5 Oh, one more thing that got lost in

Speaker 5 the March Madness weekend. The commanders signed our quarterback.
It's Jacoby Brissette. Oh, hell yeah.
So I think Hank said it's a real life.

Speaker 5 We get Lamar Jackson. We have Lamar Jackson at home meme come to life.
Yeah.

Speaker 5 Jacoby Brissette, the only thing I know about him is

Speaker 5 he's got a hell of an arm because he was the designated Hail Mary thrower for back-to-back quarterbacks in Indianapolis, Andrew Luck, when he was recovering from shoulder surgery and Phillip Rivers when he was recovering from being old.

Speaker 5 And also Jacoby Brissette is the best non-bush push quarterback sneaker in the NFL.

Speaker 1 Now that Tom Brady's gone.

Speaker 5 Statistically, no, I think even for the last couple seasons, Jacoby's been better than everybody besides Jalen Hurts

Speaker 5 on the push ones. So our friend Sam Schwartzein actually sent me these stats to make me feel better about getting not Lamar Jackson as quarterback.

Speaker 5 He said that the commanders went for it on 16 times from fourth and one or two, and they averaged negative 0.97 EPA per play. They only had a 50% success rate.

Speaker 1 This is too many numbers at one of them.

Speaker 5 Okay, here's all you need to know. For a backup quarterback.

Speaker 1 Not even throwing the ball.

Speaker 5 If they went on it every single,

Speaker 5 if the commanders had gone on it with Jacoby Brissette at quarterback every single room, fourth and one, they would have added 32 points last season, meaning they would have won that game against the Giants and potentially been in the playoffs.

Speaker 1 Oh, okay.

Speaker 9 This is a farther reach than my Zach Wilson.

Speaker 1 It's numbers.

Speaker 1 It's just too many numbers at one in the morning. It's numbers.

Speaker 9 It's birch madness. Like Zach Wilson doing ayahuasca makes more sense.

Speaker 1 Billy might be right now. No.
Billy might be ready. No.

Speaker 5 It's numbers. It's numbers.
It's stats.

Speaker 9 Like Zach Wilson doing conspiracies with Aaron Rodgers to be better makes more sense.

Speaker 1 And the most important part about being a quarterback is throwing the ball. Yeah.

Speaker 3 Yeah. Well,

Speaker 1 just let me cope. Okay, we want to do the last ad and then we'll do Monday reading.

Speaker 15 That's the sound of extremely processed dog food, which is the norm at most pet food companies. But at the farmer's dog, we do things differently.
We gently cook our food without ultra-processing.

Speaker 15 It's developed by our team of board-certified board-certified nutritionists, made to human-grade safety standards, and portioned for your dog, then delivered right to your door.

Speaker 15 How does that sound to you? Get 50% off your first box, available only at thefarmersdog.com.

Speaker 1 Okay, Monday Reading Time.

Speaker 5 Monday reading, this was sent to me by an AWL. There is a post on Reddit right now, and it's written by a guy who is in a Madden League with Kyler Murray.

Speaker 5 The title of this reading is, Kyler Murray character issues are a real concern based off my Madden League experience with him.

Speaker 1 Sweet, he played in an online Madden League.

Speaker 5 Madden League. Yeah, so like a full season

Speaker 5 with Kyler Murray

Speaker 5 as a player on one of the other teams. Kyler Murray had some character issues brought up this past year.
My story will touch on his character issues that may or may not affect his dynasty value.

Speaker 5 Not too long ago, I joined a few semi-serious Madden leagues with some online friends. I'm above average and knew the gimmicky tactics that were highly frowned on.

Speaker 5 The league posted on the league's message boards that mentioned not to use these tactics in-game.

Speaker 5 For example, the user would put the fastest corner at linebacker and spin him around the lineman at snap. This did something to the O-line while still having the middle of the field covered.

Speaker 5 Another one was running the same cheese plays all game if you had a fast enough wide receiver and the defense didn't have fast cornerbacks.

Speaker 1 I disagree with that, by the way. If you find one,

Speaker 1 like playing Madden or a college football game, like if you have one play that works, just I mean Sharkwheel, just run it.

Speaker 5 Would you do that against other online players?

Speaker 1 If they can't stop it, yeah, stop it. Okay.
Stop the play.

Speaker 5 Actually, if they cheat on offense, running the gimmick play on offense, then you just counter that by cheating on defense and doing the cornerback or linebacker move.

Speaker 1 But just, I hate when, like, oh, you can't run the same play. No, if I have a play that works, Green Bay Power Sweep, run it.

Speaker 5 This did something to the O-line while still having the middle of the field covered. Another one was running the same.
Oh, yeah, I said that.

Speaker 5 Basically, you couldn't cover the two routes as a user unless you ran a specific defense. Well, then run that specific defense if you know what it is.
Right.

Speaker 5 But then they could just audible into the second cheese play and snap without any time for you to adjust the coverage. There are others too.

Speaker 5 So one of these leagues included Kyler Murray and we were in the same division. In the first or second game of the season we played and he used these banned tactics all game.

Speaker 5 I reported him to the commission. I believe a few others did too from my chats with the commission.
There was a post about warning and it seemed to stop. We played again late in the season.

Speaker 5 It was a big game to make the playoffs for both of us. Kyler Murray played fair until the second half when he was down.
He pulled the same cheese plays and defensive tactics banned.

Speaker 5 I messaged the Commission again.

Speaker 1 You know what? I am on Kyler Murray. Yeah, like this is, I, this guy went online.

Speaker 5 This guy's a Karen.

Speaker 1 He went online to complain about Kyler Murray beating him in Madden. Yep.
That's really what we're getting out of this. I messaged the Commission

Speaker 5 again, and he said they would take care of it. Well, the message board was flooded by a few people defending these tactics, but not by Kyler directly.
I'm assuming it were his buddies backing him up.

Speaker 5 I think, reading between the lines here, I think Kyler Murray created a bunch of sock puppet accounts and then replied to this message on the message board, be like, no, it's fine. No, it's fine.

Speaker 5 Let him do it. Let him do it.
Let him do it. Comish stood his ground on not allowing it.
Finally, we met in the playoffs, and Kyler used every cheese tactic in the book. Good.

Speaker 5 People watched the stream and saw I ended up winning the game. You know what?

Speaker 5 Cliff Kingsbury should have done some cheese plays here.

Speaker 9 No, I was just thinking Kyler and Cliff Kingsbury definitely argued because he thought that some cheese plays would work in the NFL.

Speaker 5 Yeah, Cliff should have incorporated these cheating plays.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 5 If you cheat in the NFL and get away with it, you're allowed to do that.

Speaker 1 Stop it. That's all you got to do.
Stop it.

Speaker 5 This makes me believe he has a character issue if he acts this way in an inconsequential Madden league.

Speaker 5 This could translate to issues with his coaching staff and maybe even other teammates who dislike his demeanor in Madden. I love this guy.

Speaker 5 You know what?

Speaker 5 I think Kyler Murray's in the right, but I love that this guy took the time to go online and complain about this and say that he's alienating teammates because they probably get beat by Kyler Murray or Madden.

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 5 Take this story as you will, but it may be the tipping point for some people who want to buy or sell.

Speaker 1 Nope. That did not change my opinion.
It just made me hate this guy.

Speaker 1 He literally, could you imagine? Like, just, I don't think he realized he definitely went online and was like, I'm about to do something.

Speaker 1 I'm about to really like do something here.

Speaker 5 You probably DM this to like every NFL reporter. Yeah.
Like, hey, Adam Schafter, I got a scoop for you.

Speaker 1 Well, you thought you did something, but in reality, if you take a step back, you were in a Madden League. That's totally fine.
I respect everyone who video games. I love video games.

Speaker 5 I wish I could play them more.

Speaker 1 You got your ass beat in the Madden League.

Speaker 5 Sounds like three times.

Speaker 1 And then you went online to be like, well, Kyler Murray's a bad guy because he beats me with the same play, and I can't figure out a defense to stop him.

Speaker 5 This gives off major John Harbaugh vibes against the Patriots when he's like, change the rules.

Speaker 5 Yeah, exactly. Maybe it's John Harbaugh that wrote this.
I wouldn't be shocked. Jesus.
What are the all-time great video game cheat moves where people be like, yo, you're cheating?

Speaker 5 Because I've long stood on the throne of it's impossible to cheat at a video game.

Speaker 1 The jump in Rainbow Road. But that's not cheating.

Speaker 5 That takes skill.

Speaker 1 Right, exactly.

Speaker 5 That's skill. In Bison in Street Fighter, when you just do the slide at people the entire time.

Speaker 9 The Konami code. That's the OG.

Speaker 1 What's that one? Up, down, up, down, left, right, right, right, right, right. Start or whatever.

Speaker 5 Yeah. But that's not cheating because you're just playing the game.
You're playing the computer.

Speaker 1 Well, when Madden first came out in the 90s, I used to just change every single player to 500 pounds and seven feet tall. Yeah.
And that ruled. Totally fine.

Speaker 3 Yeah, Michael Vick, like

Speaker 3 just running the draw with Michael Vick.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 That was true.

Speaker 1 You couldn't do that.

Speaker 1 You couldn't stop him. Bo Jackson and Tecmo.
Yeah. But yeah, again, I don't know, stop it.

Speaker 5 Using Yoshi and Mario Kart, some people would say that's cheating.

Speaker 1 Yeah, stop it.

Speaker 5 The thing is, there is like two schools of thought when it comes to Madden.

Speaker 9 Like, you can play Madden in ways that would never work in a real football situation that like people exploit.

Speaker 9 So like some guys, when they're playing online, they'll look at all the suggested plays to the defense that they run or whatever offense.

Speaker 5 No peeking, yeah.

Speaker 1 No peeking

Speaker 1 is cheating.

Speaker 9 They'll pull up all the plays that they know the other person will run.

Speaker 5 And it's like, it's like a whole chess match. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Or not punting on punting downs, but that's like, again, I don't know. Just stop them.

Speaker 5 Wasn't there a controversy in some big Madden tournament about punting?

Speaker 1 I don't know. Oh, yes.

Speaker 9 Some guy put his punter as a quarterback. He put his punter as a quarterback and then just ran the ball.

Speaker 1 Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 Because like he used

Speaker 1 to drafted his players and all of them were incredible and he just had a terrible quarterback. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Which that does suck if you're playing against that guy and just getting the ball run down your throat. Yeah.
But again, I want a couple national titles running the ball. Run the damn ball.
Stu.

Speaker 5 Stew. Stefanski.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 All right. Great show.
Great weekend. God damn it, do I love March Madness? Thoughts and prayers to everyone for the next three days.
It really is a hard. They really should just

Speaker 1 baseball opening day should be tomorrow. Yeah.
Like, give us something. Well, we have baseball tomorrow.
Yeah, we do. But it's at night.
But

Speaker 1 I need a day. We're big fans of the World Baseball class.
I need a day sport to ease myself off. They just sit there.
I'm like, well, what do I do now?

Speaker 5 Rugby Six Nations.

Speaker 1 You get to the fourth day of March Madness. You're like, is this every day? We get to just watch basketball.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Hank, have you ever gotten this? The lottery ball? I have not. I want to actually say something.
Great, great times at Columbus. The sports book was awesome.
Shout out everyone who came out.

Speaker 1 It was awesome to see people out there. Everyone who watched.
On Saturday night, my brain was so toasted.

Speaker 1 I came back from going to the bathroom and someone was like, is Hank ever going to get the lottery ball? And I said, yes. And then someone else from the crowd said, Big Cat, you just said yes.

Speaker 1 He's never going to get it. I was like, yes, I meant no.
So I just want to correct that. Shout out that one guy.
I meant meant no. He's never going to get it.

Speaker 1 Numbers. 16.

Speaker 3 7.

Speaker 1 Why? Why are you doing 7?

Speaker 3 Why not?

Speaker 9 Take a crazy chance.

Speaker 1 All right, I'll do 17.

Speaker 9 Wait, should we get a number from Jake?

Speaker 1 He's 18. Every time.

Speaker 5 I'm going to go 77.

Speaker 1 20.

Speaker 1 Good luck, Hank. Thank you.
Sorry, I got sick.

Speaker 9 The color's back, though.

Speaker 3 Yeah, no, I feel better. That was weird.

Speaker 9 Weird show.

Speaker 1 54.

Speaker 1 You really thought you had something with seven.

Speaker 1 You're the Kyler Murray guy on Reddit being like, I got something here. Seven.

Speaker 1 What was the thought process behind seven?

Speaker 3 I was just thinking that seven was going to come up.

Speaker 1 Oh, but you... But you were wrong.
Yeah.

Speaker 5 It is shocking hanging out with Hank and the amount of people that come up to him and just say numbers to him.

Speaker 1 No, he has to get this before we move to Chicago. We were talking about that the other day.
He needs to get this because it's like

Speaker 1 new bars, just a whole new group of people that can just

Speaker 5 guys were whispering numbers. You've got to get it.

Speaker 9 What if Hank can't move till he gets the number?

Speaker 1 He'll never

Speaker 1 stay in New York.

Speaker 1 I wouldn't wish that at all. You want to do one more? That's a joke.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 16.

Speaker 1 Must have a count? Yeah. All right, 17.
7.

Speaker 1 This would be great if he gets it because it's such a Mickey Mouse.

Speaker 5 77.

Speaker 3 That's what I don't know. It's Europe.

Speaker 1 It'd be so Mickey Mouse. Yes.

Speaker 1 It'd be so Mickey Mouse. It counts, it counts.

Speaker 1 99.

Speaker 1 Even farther away from seven.

Speaker 5 Oh, damn. Memes had 55 in the first one.

Speaker 1 Oh. Just going off.
All right. We'll see everyone on Wednesday.

Speaker 5 Love you guys.

Speaker 9 Flamingos can only swallow upside down.

Speaker 9 Hell yeah.

Speaker 1 They can't swallow.

Speaker 1 They can only eat upside down.

Speaker 1 Say it anyway.

Speaker 1 Today isn't my day to find you, shy it away.

Speaker 1 I'll be coming for you, love a

Speaker 1 lover.

Speaker 1 needle less to say.

Speaker 1 I'm hots and it's about me, some little way.

Speaker 1 Slowly, the light is okay to stay after me.

Speaker 1 It's for better to save the time, save the time, save the time,

Speaker 1 Release the anger, release your mind, release your job, release the tide, release the strain, release the stress, release the love, forget the rest.

Speaker 1 jingle white, oh, king away, oh, king away, oh, king away, oh, king away, oh, king away.