Jimmy Tatro, Baylor Champs, Sam Darnold And Bryson Being Low Key Cool?

Hey, Pardon My Take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music.
On today's Pardon My Take, we have our good friend Jimmy Tatro on the show. He's on a new sitcom on ABC called Home Economics, but a really fun interview with him.
We've had him on a bunch of times he's great uh we have a recap of monday night's championship game little master's talk little sam donald to the panthers hot seat cool throne uh faqs jake's one shining moment we have it all and we're going to do it in a second we're brought to you by our friends ever had one of those days when it's just too cold to keep working? Nah, neither has Ariat. Ariat work jackets and boots are packed with all the cold-stopping waterproof protection you need to get the job done under any conditions so you can take any job out there and always deliver.
Check out Ariat in your local workwear retailer or visit Ariat.com slash work to get 10% off your first order when you sign up for email. And whether whatever in Ariat Work Gear.
Boy! Boy! Now in the street there is violence And then I love to solve the work to be done No place to hang I love washing And then I can't Leave all on the sun Oh no We're gonna rock down to Electric Avenue And then we'll take it higher Oh we're gonna Rock down to Electric Avenue And then we'll take it higher And then we'll take to rock down to Electric Avenue.

It's part of my tape presented by Barstool Sports. Welcome to part of my tape presented by Norton.com slash PMT.
It is Norton Cybersecurity 360 with LifeLock. Use that code PMT.
You get 25% off Norton 360 with LifeLock. Today is Wednesday, April 7th, and Gonzaga has let us down once again.
Playing a real conference, bro. West Coast Conference, Clown Conference.
Pepperdine ain't done shit. No, actually, the real story from Monday night's championship game, I'm actually going to be nice to Gonzaga because we're sometimes mean to them.
No one in the world was beating Baylor on Monday night. And I think that we spent all year talking about how great Gonzaga was, rightfully so, because they were undefeated.
But the real debate now is, is Baylor an all-time great team because they destroyed everyone in the tournament. The only team that covered against Baylor was the University of Hartford.
I thought you were going to say Wisconsin. Nope, University of Hartford.
Okay, that was a twist. Yeah, University of Hartford in their first game.
I think they scored very late to cover a 25-point spread. But Baylor was dominating all year.
The only hiccups they really had was Kansas off of a COVID, three-week COVID. It was senior night in Kansas.
And senior night. So it was a Kansas game that they lost in Lawrence off a COVID hiatus, and then they lost to Cade Cunningham in Oklahoma State in the Big 12 championship game.
The story obviously was the undefeated season that Gonzaga was trying to accomplish. Do you know, fun fact, there's actually never been a one-loss season since 1976.
Champion. Okay.
So Baylor is already in the conversation for best champion in the last 30 years. I like that.
Also, the best one-loss team of all time probably goes to Gonzaga. Should we say that? Well, you might say the 38-1 Kentucky.
Oh, yeah. Or the Illinois team, right? Not the championship, though.
Yeah, so actually— Not the championship. You know what? Embrace debate.
I don't even know if Gonzaga cracks the top five of one-loss teams. So, I don't know what you do if you're a Gonzaga fan.
I don't know if there are a lot out there. I did go searching for them, a little schadenfreude last night.
I wanted to see, like, the hardcore Zag fans who were in the point of the night after the game where they're like, if anyone's saying that we have to play in a real conference, just block them and move on. Well, you should play in a real conference.
You should absolutely play in a real conference. Yes, I'm going to say that with my chest.
And yeah, a lot of it has to do with the fact that there aren't a ton of Gonzaga fans out there. It's not like we're talking shit about the Steelers for being the worst 14-0 team of all time.
When we say that, we get a ton of people that make us feel bad about our takes. Right.
With Gonzaga, it's like free play. Right.
Consequence free zone. Everything we thought was verified on Monday night.
I like that. Yeah, let's go back and be like, we said this the entire year.
Yeah, no, no. Gonzaga was an awesome team this year.
I thought they were going to win. You're right.
That's the difference between UCLA

playing their perfect game and

Baylor playing their perfect game.

Baylor did it and it was never closed.

J-Butt, that's what I'm calling him now.

J-Butt was calling God last night.

J-Butt 2. J-Butt 2 was

calling God last night. Hope God's got

rollover minutes. He was fucking dialed

in. He had a moment where

when a shooter is so

locked in and they're shooting into the ocean

Thank you. I was calling God last night.
Hope God's got rollover minutes. He was fucking dialed in.
He had a moment where when a shooter is so locked in and they're shooting into the ocean,

and it's not even like when he shoots a three,

it's when he was shooting free throws,

and they were as pure as a pure free throw could be,

where it was just beautiful to watch.

Like, you know, not all swishes are made the same.

They're like snowflakes.

So the way he was locked in was incredible.

They were just a more physical team, a better team defensively.

I don't want to do the old man yells at Cloud,

but Drew Timmy stroking his mustache when they were getting killed.

They were down 15.

Also altering the mustache in general.

Altering the mustache.

Also getting absolutely cooked on defense basically all night. though here's okay here's something nice for gonzaga fans drew timmy played so bad in the championship game he has no choice but to come back to college there you go he should have just shaved everything at halftime he should he should have come out looking like johnny sins in the second half yeah like bald just a smooth guy two for two on Sins this week.
Oh, shit, I got bonked again? You know what it was? It's Jimmy's and Joe's over Timmy's and Joel's. Mm-hmm.
And Jalen Suggs getting, obviously, the foul. I hate the foul rule in college, especially in the tournament, because it reminded me of when Florida played Ohio State in the national championship game and it was billed as

Joe Kim Noah and Greg Oden. Joe Kim Noah

gets, I think, two fouls very quickly.

He only plays 20 minutes of that game.

I want to see the best players play.

I think that in the tournament, I know this is probably stupid

and they'd never do it, but they should make it

so that you can get six fouls, seven fouls, whatever.

The sixth foul is

essentially like a technical, where you get two

shots in the ball. Jalen Suggs being out of that game two minutes in sucked for everyone.
I agree. I think that that's a good take it'll never happen.
No, it'll never happen. No one's going to change the rules like that.
But yes, you're right. We want to see the best players play.
I also think that somewhere along the lines we've incentivized college referees to make more charge calls because they get really into it. There's nothing more than a college ref likes than doing the charge call, except maybe like putting your hand on the small of another official's back while you talk it over.
They love doing that too. It's TV Teddy.
TV Teddy and Bo Borowski both made the charge call. They made the charge call sexy.
They need to figure out a different symbol for the charge call to make it less cool to do. I have a mic scream butt.
Smack yourself in the face. Yeah, scratch your butt, bite your fist.
I have a Mike Greenberg's dumb rule. I don't know if it's too early on the show for this.
No, go for it. To fix the charge rule, because this is one of those things where there's so many and it's kind of annoying where there's too many charges, they should make it so that if you score, it counts.
That's what I said. If you dunk.
No matter what. I like that.
I think definitely if you dunk on a charge, the charge is waved off. You're saying just if the ball goes in on a shot.
But a lot of times there's no shot that's put up. Right.
I also think you should have to attempt defense. Not just, you know, obviously I'm probably hurting myself here because I do root for Brad Davison.
But you should have to attempt defense instead of doing like the hold my nuts and get run over move. Like you should have to actually try to block a shot and get charged instead of just trying to get charged.
I don't hate that rule, Hank. I think if the ball goes in, it's fair play across the board.
And the possession still switches. I also like what we're doing here, which is we're drawing just massive conclusions from this one game that kind of blindsided everybody, basically.

But I like that.

That's when we start really cooking with our good brains.

I think that next year the conversation needs to start happening.

Like, are transfers the new one and done?

Oh, yeah.

Everyone's getting all hot and bothered about transfers.

So it's like if you're doing the brain meme, regular brain is play with four-year seniors. Exploding brain is two and done.
Galaxy brain is one and done. And then the universal brain is guys that were supposed to be one and done then transferred to become two and done somewhere else.
Yes. Everyone's getting all upset about i love the i love the fact that everyone's able to transfer right now i think it makes the whole league better i think or the whole like college basketball better because i'd rather see the talent spread out and i'd also rather see like players that that want to compete for uh you know a job and be a starter and they're like all right i right, I'm going to go here.
I don't know.

It's just better.

I think it's better.

You not like it, Jake?

I also am saying this because Musbust kills the transfers,

and I want him to continue to be great.

If coaches can hop from school to school and not have to wait,

players should be able to do the same thing.

I love it.

Agreed.

I love it.

Jake, so your take on the championship game and maybe your one shining moment,

how did you end up doing?

Yeah, so obviously the game was a bit of a letdown

in terms of excitement.

I'm happy for Hank and Rhea.

They get to go on a vacation with their winnings.

That's great.

Well-deserved.

Yeah, well-deserved.

And the production people get their money.

They deserve it too.

But it would have been great for the sport if we got a close game because there was so much buildup and hype to this game. And from the beginning, it was, what, 9-0? And Gonzaga really never stood a chance.
Yeah, the moment was too big for Gonzaga. The lights were too bright out there.
And, Hank, just a point of clarity, I've worked sidelines on stool streams probably, like, what, a dozen 15 times that's that's counts as being part of the production staff right well I clarified in my tweet day to day day to day so you are you have made contributions which I appreciate very much you're great on the sidelines you're great as a competitor uh but you know there's a group text with people that are in the in the mix day to day you were not on that group oh because because you didn't put me on your group text. Well, you're just not in the day-to-day.
If you want to be day-to-day, I mean, I feel like you guys don't like talking about it in general. I'm good.
Well, no, you talk about it more than enough for us. No, but that's the thing.
I didn't bring it up today. It just got brought up.
I didn't want to talk about it. We did just add a spit and chocolates game.
Oh, okay. That was definitely not going to be your hot seat.
No, no, it wasn't. That's the thing.
It really wasn't. I am not trying to be annoying about it, but you guys talk about it so much that I have no choice but to fill in details.
So, Jake, what was the final tally on your one-shining moment? I believe it was 37 out of 68. That's pretty good.
Yeah. Is there one moment that was included that you just slapped yourself on the forehead and you're like, man, I really blew that one.
I should have put that one on my list. Roy Williams was kind of bullshit, just going to say.
Yeah, the Roy Williams, the Long Kruger thing, I should have included that. Yeah.
They weren't in the tournament, so how could you expect that? Yeah. I thought it was a great montage.
The only thing that you had... Wait, they were in the tournament.
No, he's saying they were knocked out so fast.

I mean, UNC was knocked out so fast.

Oklahoma played a second round, right?

Yeah.

Yeah.

They won their first.

You had a moment that definitely,

I thought that you were like levels above their thinking with the VCU thing.

Yeah.

That one I missed.

The sad Grand Canyon thing I did nail.

Oh, you.

Victory last one. Yeah, credit to you for Grand Canyon had a kid die and you said they'd be in there.
No, I'm not trying to take a victory lap. I'm talking about out-of-the-box picks.
It was that, and then it was the VCU thing. Did you have...
Was there any call that you saw from the game last night that you wanted to translate into different languages? Ooh.

I have my 12 languages here. All right, let's go.

Let's go.

All right.

I apologize in advance if I mispronounce,

when I mispronounce, because this could get ugly.

Just do four.

Give us Japanese.

Okay.

German.

Canadian.

Swahili.

I have 12. I have Japanese and German on here.
Okay. German.
Canadian. Swahili.
I have 12. I have Japanese and German on here.
Okay. Go.
Okay. Japanese.
Japanese. Nice.
That was pretty good. All right.
German. It'd be great if there was like...
Are you picking every country that we fought in World War II here? Yeah. Italy's next.
A little more emotion. Oh, Billy said a little more emotion.
Billy, you try to do it in English. Okay, go ahead.
German. Trainer Drew and Baylor bending the rebound and the winder off ball of college basketball with an Mr.
Schaft. Okay, that sounds evil.
Alright, now do Italian. Italian.
Use your hands. Coach Drew and Baylor completely and reimbursing y rico strus y cono con un campeonato.
I just imagine like there's it'd be so funny if there was like an Italian AWL who doesn't even really understand English. And then for one brief second, this is their shining moment.
Yeah, this is their shining moment. It's like, oh my God.
All right, Jake, last one. Free choice.

Actually, no, no.

Indian.

Do Indian.

I don't have Indian on here. Jake, we're trying to build the Indian audience, dude.

Yeah, free choice, though.

Go ahead.

No, don't tell us what, and we'll guess it.

Okay.

Russian.

Hebrew. Hebrew.

Okay.

Got it.

Do you have a Russian?

Do you have Russian?

Yeah, I have Russian.

Yeah, give me one Russian.

Come on.

It feels good.

Trainer Drew

and Baylor

are going to be

in the basketball

and the college

is the champion

of the world.

Are you sure

that's not Ukrainian? I have no idea. It's certainly Russian.
No, it's Ukrainian. It's Ukrainian.
I'm going to Brandon Marshall stand up. It's Ukrainian.
That's fucking Ukrainian. It's always been Ukrainian.
That was great, Jake. I appreciate that.
Again, the Grand Canyon thing was not meant to be. No, you get credit.
You deserve it. Take your victory lap.
Me and you. Come on vacation with me.
Hank, put another round of applause here. Are you hoping another kid dies next year so you get an easy one on the One Shining Moment? It's like the free play on Bingo.
Stop. I honestly want to say, Jake, that was very impressive.
Yeah. The fact that you remembered to do it and you did all those, you had probably 10 others on deck to do.
Can you imagine if we gave Billy that assignment? If we didn't hold his hand and remind him six times to do it? No, you nailed it, Jake. It was a great tournament run.
Man, it was an awesome tournament. I think we all can agree.
It was great to have it back, and it just felt like I get sad whenever the tournament ends because it is really the best pound-for-pound, the best three-week, four-week stretch if you count conference tournaments of sports because it's just wall-to-wall. It was so fun.
You don't know what you have until it's gone. Yeah, yeah.
So, all right, to put a bow on it, Gonzaga will never win a title. I mean, they didn't play against a single ranked team in the entire year of 2021.
That's true. Well, in the tournament, they played Baylor.
Yeah, and they lost. Yeah.
Wait, who else? Creighton? No, Creighton might not have been. Yeah, they beat him in the Sweet 16.
Yeah, I'm thinking of who was ranked before. Either way.
Not counting the tournament. Yeah, not counting the tournament.
Yes, yes. The WCC is a Mickey Mouse.
That's right. It is a Mickey Mouse league.
No disrespect to Loyola Marymount and Portland State and Pepperdine. St.
Mary's. Portland, not Portland State.
Portland State. Why not both? Portland, Portland State Reed College San Francisco Yeah, all the greats You know, places that we all know The blue bloods of the WCC Do you think we have a single listener who attends Reed? No I don't think that we do Ah, I think that sounds like a weed college It's definitely a weed college Where is it? Portland It's in Oregon Yeah Not in Portland, but it's Yes Okay I think that sounds like a weed college.
It's definitely a weed college. Where is it? Portland.
It's in Oregon.

Yeah.

Not in Portland, but it's...

Yes.

Okay.

I think anywhere there's weed smokers, we have at least a few.

So, yes, definitely.

Absolutely.

Reed College.

Tweet us if you go to Reed College.

And also confirm that everyone gets a bong when they get their freshman orientation.

The degree comes rolled up.

Real tight. All right.
So, other news. Sam Darnold is officially a Carolina Panther.
My knee-jerk reaction was, oh, that's actually not too bad for both sides. The Jets got something, which clearly they want to get rid of Sam Darnold, and the Panthers get a guy who they take a gamble on.
But then I thought about it more. I was like, when does this ever work? Like, Sam Donald kind of probably is what he is.
Even though he's with Adam Gase, like, is he really going to be incredible? I got two words for you. Joe Brady.
Joe Brady. That's what, essentially they're just gambling on Joe Brady being so good at coaching up quarterbacks that he's able to undo every single thing that he's learned with Adam Gase.
Okay, but here's the problem. If Joe Brady does do that, Joe Brady will get a head coaching job.
Correct. And then you get back to regular Sam Darnold.
I mean, Joe Brady almost got a head coaching job this offseason. Right, that's what I'm saying, though.
He's going to be back, so you've got to cram. And then hope he retains it all? Yeah, you've got to cram, hope he retains everything.
Because then you would also have to sign him to a long-term deal well they they picked up his option no i'm saying if joe brady made him awesome they would be like oh well sam darnel's our quarterback in the future and joe brady's gone and then maybe it would be a disaster so it would be interesting because they would get to the end of next season let's say the panthers go i'd say like 10 and 6 would be a great success. PFT.
What? Come on, dude.

10 and 7. Put it in the swear jar.
Put it in the schedule jar. Every time we incorrectly say 16 games or we pronounce the Marlins field with an uppercase P, we will have to put $5 into the jar.
Dude, it hurts. It hurts because someone tweeted me the other day.
It doesn't feel right. 10 and 7 feels wrong.
Someone treated me the other day, they're like, Bears are going to be lucky to go 7 and 10. And I was like, damn.
10 losses? What is this? Next we're going to have to do shit on aggregate? It feels like soccer. It sucks, man.
So, yeah, if they go 10 and 7, I think that would be a pretty big success for them. But then at the end of that year, they would still have him for another year because they did pick up the option.
But they would probably want to commit to him because they wouldn't want to let him go. But they might not because now he doesn't have Joe Brady anymore.
Right. So it's kind of – I don't know how it – They put themselves in a future decision-making problem that we can see coming from a mile away.
And if he's good enough to get them to the middling range, then they won't be high enough in the draft to get a nice new quarterback. Right.
So it's weird. And it also asks you, why did they get Teddy Bridgewater last year? Because now they have to keep paying Teddy Bridgewater.
So my knee-jerk reaction was everyone wins. And I think the Jets do still win because they obviously think Zach Wilson is the guy.
And they get some extra draft capital. I don't really understand.
The Panthers are taking a gamble, but it feels like a precarious way forward. So I think the Eagles win this trade because of what they ended up getting for Carson Wentz.
It's like, wow, we really put the Colts over a barrel on this one. Although Carson Wentz has played better in his career.
I think Sam Donarnold, yeah, he could absolutely deal with a change of scenery at this point. Oh, definitely.
And I think the Jets are probably going to be happy. The Panthers, was there a better option out there that the Panthers could go for right now? I don't know if there's a better option right now.
So it is kind of win-win. Yeah, I just don't know.
Both teams finish this trade 9-8. Yeah, I just think Sam Darnold's one of those guys.
He was kind of that guy in college. You know, like a lot of turnovers.
He was, I guess he had some good moments, but not really consistent moments. I don't know.
It's very rare that a guy is like this for an extended period of time, and then all of a sudden he's something different. The real question we have to ask, is he a pogue or is he a kook? Yeah, that's true.
Would you die for Sam D? He would be perfect on that show. He definitely would be.
Yeah, I guess it will be interesting to see what happens. I don't really know.
I guess Joe Brady's got to work his magic.

That's really what it comes down to. That's my favorite thing to say after we've talked ourselves into a state of

just utter confusion. Just always

wrap it up with, it will be interesting to see what

happens. Because it will be interesting.

I'm excited to see what happens.

I also enjoy

the new fad of people

tweeting out select Sam

Darnold throws from last year being like, you're telling me that Zach Wilson's better than this? It's like, well, that's, yeah, probably. Yeah, I would say so.
But also any Sam Darnold highlight that you see from the last couple years is it's intrinsically poisoned because he practiced against Greg Williams' defenses all the time. And as we know, Greg Williams would do fucked up stuff to a young quarterback.
My question is, does Sam Darnold get traded from the Jets if he never gets mono? Is that the sliding door moment of Sam Darnold's entire life? I actually kind of think it is. Like some poor girl went out in Hoboken when she should have stayed home.
But it was what? It's the Elijah Moore effect. Was it his second or third year that he got Mono? Was it two years ago? It was two years ago.
So it was his second? No. Yeah, it was his second year.
When did he get drafted? Fuck. Is Mono the second year bump? It was 2018 draft.
Because we were worried about him getting COVID. So it was his second year.
So that's an important year for a quarterback. It's his second year, and he misses.
What were you going to say? What did you just say? did you just say well because the third year we thought he was gonna get covid as a joke you're like oh he's gonna be out with covid because he's gonna catch it all the years this last year has completely that was a very funny joke that we said really ruined uh like my conception of time it's i can't i can't fully grasp time anymore hey guys it's still march 2020 yeah 2020. Yeah.
No, but sometimes it feels like that. It does.
Alright, so he was drafted in 2018, he played in 2019, and he got mono in 2019, so his second year. So we're right.
So if he never gets mono, is he something different? And I actually kind of think yes. Yeah, it time for sure billy's billy's shaking his head saying no but yeah i'm waiting for the the first column to come out blaming hookup culture on sam donald's regression as an nfl quarterback that's what i need yeah prisco you're due and by the way i actually so when we started talking about jimmy's and joe's x's and o's i had a flashback to Pete Prisco's Twitter account, so I did a little search through his timeline.
You blocked? Absolutely not. He's never blocked me.
Well, actually, I think he probably has blocked me at some point. I think he would block anyone.
Yeah, he would block us for sure. But he is the king.
If you look at his Twitter feed from 2010 through 2016, he was all about tweeting out Jimmy's and Joe's, X's and O's, like, all the time.

Well, because he washes the tape.

He grinds that fucking tape.

He washes the tape.

But, Bill, you were saying that you don't think that him getting mono

was that big of an impact.

Sam Darnold in that situation on the Jets, what he went through is, like,

totally – Sam Darnold with a new start, way better than anything

that could have happened in that Jets organization. Right now we got Saleh getting everything renewed.
Salah. He's cleaning house, and he knew Darnold was a victim of the situation, and he would be able to get a lot for him in Carolina and get him out of there.
I don't really understand what that meant. Yeah, I agree.
I agree. You know what the Panthers should do? Was it the Liverpool song? Or the Jets should do this.
We got Salah. Money, money.
Just find different players on the team and redo that song because it's a banger. Yeah.
And Bobby Fornino. And we gotoutinho.
All right, Masters.

We have the Masters coming.

Very excited for that.

Brooks is playing.

Tiger is not.

Correct.

Max Homa is partnered with Bryson,

and I have an issue that I'd like to address.

I saw Bryson with his driver hitting those drives in the practice range and i i kind of like so i know the clip that you're talking about i kind of like objectively speaking it was very cool here we go again no no i don't i know it's hard no no i still don't like him. I don't like him.
Never will. Did you see the clip? The clip was, he was like smashing him, and then he would get pissed off that he didn't have another ball.
He'd be like, give me another fucking ball. And then he'd take it and slam it down.
It was like he was playing slam ball. Yeah, and he has a new driver that he's going to unveil.
How long is it? How long is this one? Very long. So I had feelings for the clip.

I was like, holy shit, this clip is badass.

You put like a little Metallica behind it. It's the coolest clip ever.
But then the article I was reading on the big lead had talk about his last trip to the Masters this fall. And remember how he thought he had COVID? and I then immediately hated Bryson again because it said that Bryson thought he might have caught COVID

but he did not in fact doctors couldn't pinpoint anything that was wrong with him according to an espn story uh dechambeau had ct scans x-rays an ultrasound on his heart measuring the blood vessels in his neck infection sheet checks brain scans and oxygen oxygen After four or five months of testing, they couldn't find anything. And I immediately hated him again.
Yeah. Because he basically just was like, how could I have not won the Masters? Find something wrong with me, doctor.
It sounds like what they did to Austin Powers' body after they defrosted him. Yeah.
Like all the different medical procedures they put him through. Yeah.
Listen, I'm not ever going to like Bryson DeChamambeau but he was mashing those he does he matches i hate him but he also does things that i like it catches my eye from across the bar and i'm like oh my god well because it's it's the guy that you would want to go over and watch he looked like a long drive competitor i don't think that that's not going to be his swing although it would be sick i don know. I don't think it's possible for him to go out on the course and do that because if you were to see like a spray chart, who knows where that was going? I feel every now and then when he gets up there and does something cool, I feel like Paris Hilton just be like, that's hot.
It's so hot. It was slightly hot.
If I'm Max Homa, just start doing math problems out loud right next to him on the golf course. Yeah, Max, you're going to do this.
Start roasting his swing out loud. You know what would be sick? If during the par three competition, that's today, right? Tomorrow.
Oh, today. It's today as it's being broadcast.
But if he was just taking sand wedges and doing that exact same swing and just hitting the dick out of him, that'd be fun. There's nothing better, though, than the Masters come down from the March Madness.
It is really the greatest setup because it's high-impact, high-stress, sports-watching for three, four weeks, and then you get the most low-impact, good on your knees, napping on the couch, in and out. The best type of sports watching.
It's such a great come down from March Madness. It's exactly how you get rid of a hangover.
So March Madness is just the rager. You stayed out until 4 a.m.
And then the next day you wake up and what's the best remedy? A little hair of the dog. Getting Jim Nance speaking to you for an entire weekend in a softer voice than he was before is the hair of the dog of coming down from sports.
So it's perfect. I'm also...
Sneakers squeaking to birds chirping. It's just beautiful.
Do you think that they were piping in the sneakers squeaking at the NCAA tournament? Because remember we were talking about that one court. One court had a higher level of squeakiness.
There are times. There was one game.
I tweeted a clip maybe like it might have been last season, but there are times when I think that they're doing it on purpose because it's so loud. I just think they were just fresh courts.
More microphones maybe. Yeah, so there's obviously a lot of storylines.
We're rooting for Brooks. If we can't root for brooks we're gonna root for max to make the cut and if we can't root for tiger yeah well with tiger did you see at the master's dinner this year so dustin johnson that was my cool throne we forgot to talk about it but yeah yeah so they're saving a seat for tiger they're keeping a seat oh for tiger would talk about the food i was just talking about the pigs in a blanket.
Oh, okay. It's on his menu.

What else is on Dustin's menu?

That's it.

That's all.

Like, no, he's got whatever.

Who cares about the rest of his menu?

He has pigs in a blanket as the appetizer. Dustin should have, like, a funnel cake station

in the bathroom stall, if you know what I'm saying.

No, but it feels like, well.

A little cover-up, yeah.

Yeah, he's got to, yeah.

I mean, that might be.

Put that sugar on there.

Yeah, he's got to, you know,

make sure you wear your shoes, Dustin, not just socks when you're walking down the stairs. But yeah, they're leaving the seat open for Tiger at the champion's dinner.
That's beautiful. And pigs in a blanket, though, it does feel.
That's more beautiful. No, it is.
It feels like we all made it. I'm never going to get to go to Augusta dinner, but I'm there in spirit when they bite into it.
When Jon Rahm and fucking Oosthaven and all these other guys and Greg Norman and Boom Boom Couples, who's going to be there for his 750th Masters, when they bite into that pigs in a blanket, that's me you're biting into. That's my penis.
Does Nance get to go to it? I bet you he goes. He should.
definitely would bring him as a plus one for sure yeah i i'm looking forward to people finding things to get upset about like that they're not honoring tiger enough this seems like we're off to a good start though leaving leaving the seat open for him like uh you think people are going to get mad if the pimento cheese isn't dyed red on sund? Yeah. I will be mad.
Personally, I will

be mad. Oh, Hank, you should

leave

Normie's dish empty tonight

for Dan Heron. Dan Heron's pug.

Also, make sure

Normie gets

extra horny on Sunday to honor

Tiger with his red rocket.

I can do that. That would be great.

Alright, let's get to our

hot seat cool throne hot seat cool thrones brought to you by we're gonna get right back to the show auto insurance can all seem the same until it comes time to use it so don't get stuck paying more for less coverage switch to usa auto insurance and you could start saving money in no time get a quote today restrictions apply All right, back to part of my take.

Hot seat, Coulthron.

My hot seat, we... Showtime.
Get a quote today. Restrictions apply.
USAA.

All right, back to part of my take.

Hot seat, Coulthard.

My hot seat, we talked about on Monday.

He was my who's back.

Now he's my hot seat.

The truth.

Paul Pierce.

Fired.

Fired.

Ready?

Watch.

Listen.

You fired.

That's good.

Who is it?

That was ours.

No, it's the guy from The Apprentice.

You fired. That's good.
It's Michael Scott, actually. Is this podcast going to be allowed to go out now? It's Michael Scott.
Oh, okay. Yeah, he got fired from ESPN for his wild Saturday night.
Yes. It honestly didn't look that wild of Saturday night.
The depressing part about it was how... No.
Yeah, no, that was a bonk. I'm getting bonked.
That was for sure a bonk. That's like CrossFit.
Your warm-up. My warm-up is your workout.
I pregame like you partied. Paul Pierce's Saturday night is my fucking Sunday afternoon.
That wasn't even... We need to get a real bonk stink.
We should get a bonk. Wait, PFT would be concussed.
We should attach it to this Doge that I've got right here. I think it's the whole new doge.
You know what, BFT,

in your defense,

I think it's the weather.

Yeah, I think you're right.

You're like a dog.

It's almost sundress season.

You're in heat.

We've got to neuter you.

But it wasn't,

that's what was depressing about it

is the fact that, like,

he seemed low-key.

Like, he was talking to his phone

when there were dancers

all around him butt naked.

Like, that's what was depressing to me.

It wasn't the fact that he was like,

I didn't feel bad for Paul Pierce.

Like, look what a sad story

this guy is having a,

I'm sorry. to his phone when there were dancers all around him butt naked like that's what was depressing to me it wasn't the fact that he was like i didn't feel bad for paul pierce like look what a sad story this guy is having a a rager with these strippers it was like they were calmly dancing i don't even think music was playing i think they were just kind of like gyrating in his living room and paul pierce was just looking at his phone that's what made me sad yeah i agree he shouldn't been fired.
It's stupid let the man live i agree let the boys watch that's why my cool throne is me if paul pierce somehow ends up working at barstool uh that would be a dream come true for myself you know just to be able to say i'm co-workers with paul pierce people what about you guys when deon sanders well that's already a dream come true every day i live my dream but it'll just be like you know you guys are my my adult heroes he was my childhood hero uh i feel like people had this reaction you guys are a little bit older when we signed deon and he was like oh deon sanders like watching my whole life blah blah i didn't have that reaction just because he was a little bit you know past when i was watching the nfl paul pierce my entire life he was like the guy so it'd be sick somehow he worked here for me it was j, it was Jerry Thornton. The truth.
When we signed him. Well, he was here long before you BFT.
But then he left. True.
And then he came back. True.
My cool throne, bonk. What? Jerry Thornton's BFT Zero.
Yeah, that's true. That's a bonk.
It's a big time bonk. I'm buying.
Yeah. You're buying a bonk.
He's going to, you're going to bonk the brain. I've been getting bonked too much recently.
Because you've been too horny. No, no, no.
Jerry Thornton is like your hero. It's not fair.
Listen, if you read some of Jerry Thornton's old columns, they were indistinguishable from PFT commenter columns circa 2014. Nice of you to call them columns.
Yeah. No, they were.
There was one that was just like, how come we can't? When do we get back to the age in baseball where we stop paying attention to numbers and start paying attention to guys who like to get laid? Mm-hmm. Good point.
My other cool throne, Aaron Rodgers, he's probably, PFT said it. I don't know if this is on your cool throne, but he's probably going to be the permanent host of Jeopardy now.
So he's going to retire from football? No, he wants to do both. He should retire.
He wants to do both. He can't do both.
He can't

possibly do both. With a strong, supportive

spouse behind him, I think that he can do anything

I don't think he can do both. I don't think he can do both.

Aaron needs the support of a... And also come on

PMT. He needs the support of a family,

a very close family unit to be able to excel,

and he's got Shailene Woodley standing

right behind him. I do think

that this is the perfect fit for

Aaron Rodgers. I think it's everything

that... He needs to come on the next him.
I do think that this is the perfect fit for Aaron Rodgers.

I think it's everything that he loves.

I watch Jeopardy a lot, and it features mustaches heavily,

and it features the host who gets to know the answers to everything

and feel smarter than everybody else,

which is exactly in Aaron Rodgers' way.

And he gets to answer things in the form of a question, which is very much him to be like why would you ask me that question instead of answering it. And Ken Jennings not possible because of Bean Dad? There's Bean Dad and then he's got Ken Jennings has some tweets.
I just like saying just hey Ken Jennings should be the next host of Jeopardy but he's friends with Bean Dad. Yeah.
dr oz you missed that week in the internet in the oz stands yeah i totally forgot about being dead

so did i i thought you're talking about the shrimp guy still yeah that's one of those things that we

we experienced when at the moment it was very funny it's all we talked about for a day but in

retrospect you did more damage to your brain thinking about being dad for two days than most

people would have done to their brain spending 17 years on methamphetamines yeah or more damage

Thank you. You did more damage to your brain thinking about Bean Dad for two days than most people would have done to their brain spending 17 years on methamphetamines.
Yeah. Or more damage than denying your nine-year-old daughter beans.
Yes. Like that's...
Bean Dad did to you what he did to... Yeah, what he was pretending to do to his daughter.
Yeah. It's fucked up.
Mm-hmm. Is that it? That's it.
Okay. All right.
My hot seat is the sun. The battle of humans versus the sun continues.
There was an article in the New York Times that scientists are putting together a plan to block the sun out. Ooh.
To reduce global warming, to reduce greenhouse gases. They're trying to put in, like, essentially a giant shade onto the world to block out some of the sun.

Finally, we're getting back at that bastard.

But I think, I mean, there's an easy way to do it, and there's a hard way.

You could use science like a nerd, or you could just straight up look at a globe

and be like, yeah, let's do that.

Let's paint the equator black like an outfielder wearing the stuff on their cheekbones

trying to absorb the glare from the sun.

To me, that seems like an elegant solution, and I think that the world would look cooler if it had a belt. Agreed.
So there we go. Take that science.
My cool throne is, well, yeah, actually, yeah, Hank, it was going to be Aaron Rodgers' intellectual curiosity. Instead, it's going to be accountability.
Accountability is on the cool throne because Dusty Baker has said that the Astros have been accountable. They've paid for their sins.
And now it's a little upsetting to him. And it really speaks to the world that we're living in these days where just because you cheated your way to a World Series title in egregious forms and then had a year where you didn't pay for the consequences.
There are people that are throwing inflatable trash cans off the field

and yelling at players in front of their children at the games.

And they've served their time, Big Cat.

The Astros have served their time.

I don't know if this is insensitive, but just brainstorming on future Mel Rushmores,

we should do winners of the coronavirus pandemic because they are up there.

They skirted so much heat, and everyone was so mad at them going into the season. Season never happened.
And then when it happened, it was already like there was so much shit that happened in between the scandal coming out and them playing games, and there was no fans. Yeah.
No, you're right. That would be a good Mount Rushmore.
LeBron. Put that in the memory machine.
Because he never would have won a title. Right.
They were fans. Seriously.
Introverts. Mm-hmm.
And extroverts.

Introverts and extroverts.

Oh, we got Hank going.

Hank, you going.

Yeah, billionaires.

Wow.

Rose emoji?

Mm-hmm.

No, I mean, it's just a fact.

It is true.

They got richer.

Yeah.

What do you think a rich person would taste like, Hank, if you were to eat them?

Yeah.

I don't know.

Only one way to find out.

Mm-hmm.

Well, I won that bet last night, too, so I shouldn't be speaking about myself in that way. How big of a guillotine would you need to make for Bezos? He seems like he's got a small head.
Well, it's neck, right, anyway? Yeah, it's the neck. They should just...
Yeah, imagine they guillotine your head. That would be brutal.
Right through your brain? Like in Kill Bill, where the top of her... Yo, I haven't seen it.
They kill Bill. All right.
You're cool. No, you did.
That was my cool throw. All right.
My hot seat is Jacob DeGrom. It's Jacob DeGrom season.
I don't. Was that yours? No, no.
What were you going to say? Don't worry about it. I can't believe we're still doing this with Jacob DeGrom.
The Mets. It was? No, no.
It was. So what was your reaction? Nothing.
You're very puzzled. You reacted, Billy.
You reacted to Jacob deGrom. No, something has happened, but I won't tell you until it's all over.
No, you have to tell us now. Okay, basically, all my hot seats and cool throws haven't been taken yet.
Oh, wow. It was a let's go reaction.
Yeah, I was like, yeah. You'd be the worst poker player of all time.

No, Jacob deGrom had another game. So since 2018, he's got a 2-0-7 ERA, and the Mets are 36-41 in those games.
Can you list the run support that Jacob deGrom has gotten in his last 10 games? Here we go. 1, two, four, two, zero, three, five.
Stanley, who cares? Get this man a diet coke. All right, go ahead, Billy.
He's better be incredible. The Red Sox put out this new alternate uniform.
They're on the hot seat? Yeah, hot seat. Everyone was like, what are these?

But no one knows they're for the marathon.

I was talking about Twitter.

I was pretty sure the tweet where they announced somewhere like, hey.

Celebrating or remembering the marathon.

Right, no, but everyone was like, what are these?

And those have been the marathon colors for 136 years.

But people outside of Boston don't know that.

But I think in the tweet, it just said that.

But the thing is, it's bright. Okay, 0 for 1.
Blue and yellow, and they're like, I thought this was the Red Sox. Over 1.
Brandon Marshall talking with his chest. Okay, 1 for 2.
Yeah, Brandon Marshall just going off being totally wrong. I thought he was so confident in what he was saying that I thought I was wrong.
I wasn't watching it. Yeah, I did too.
I was like, wait a second, but then 10 days and then there's the two-way contracts, which I don't And only four players get paid? Yeah, only four players are on salary at any given time on the NBA. I went and Googled it.
I was like, wait, is it? I mean, he could have convinced me that he was right. It was incredible.
I think we used to start doing that ourselves. Yeah.
Just Billy says anything but confident. Okay, you're one for two.
Rappaport went on first take and cried. Well, no for three because it was undisputed.
No, one for three now. One for three.
Undisputed? It was undisputed, and he also said at the end it was a joke. But it was funny because...
And you could tell because he's such a bad actor that it wasn't like... I know Billy so much.
Oh, fuck. Is there any level of you guys that wish that you went harder at Rapport so you could have got deposed and had these clips come out? Because they're so funny.
I mean, I don't want to incriminate myself too much, but I said some things that have been recorded and are publicly available that he probably could have deposed me in one for. Yeah.
But he's so incompetent as a human being that he wasn't able to come up with this stuff. And when he was doing that thing on Undisputed, he says he was joking at the end, but everything that he was saying, there are things that he actually feels, but he was pretending to cry about it when in reality he almost wanted to cry about it.
And that's what the joke was. He is that guy.
He was like, oh, I'm so sensitive.

I'd go and sue a whole company.

He is that guy.

He is a clown.

He's a joke.

Like, he burns every bridge.

But with all that said, I still think the cat killing saga was one of the funniest things ever.

That's probably why he didn't depose us.

Because we would have just sat there and been like, dude killed cats Like he killed cats Cool throne Bruce Campbell Former Raiders tackle There was a video accusing him of being in a Walmart fight But turns out It was just a random tall Offensive lineman looking guy Oh Two for four Did it actually look like him a little bit? There was a post that said... Billy's not on steroids.
Yeah, it was also a really stupid tweet because it was like, now you know why Derek Carr sucks. It's like, Bruce Campbell played for the Raiders in 2010.
Yeah, he got knocked out. Basically, he got knocked out by a much shorter, lighter, skinnier guy.
That's right. All right, two for four.
Now we're getting to the garbage ones because I thought... Oh, now we skinnier guy.
Alright, two for four.

Now we're getting to the garbage ones because I thought... Oh, now we are.

Let's see.

DoorDash drivers have been

beating the algorithm to get higher

pay rates on their deliveries.

Two for five.

The Jets. Cool Throne.

So you thought we were going to not talk about Sam Darnold?

How about this? What about... I got an extra Cool Throne for you.
I just remembered. Cool Th.
So you thought we were going to not talk about Sam Darnold? We weren't going to talk about Sam Darnold? How about this? What about...

I got an extra cool throne for you.

I just remembered.

Cool throne every team in the NFL.

Solid batting average.

Yeah, it is.

Football in the South for having a whole Easter sermon on people who decommitted from Clemson

and talking about the importance of commitment.

Jesus decommitted from being dead. The ultimate transfer portal was The Rock.
And that was my hot seat, Cole Theron. All right, good job, Billy.
The one thing I wanted to bring up, though, the Falcons are now saying that they are willing to trade their first-round pick. I think they're picking fourth.
And so that is actually a cool throne for every team in the NFL because you get to have a couple weeks of discussion of maybe it's going to be us. No one's out of it just yet.
So the Bears might do it, Big Cat. No, we got Russell Wilson.
Jake, do you have anything that we missed? Yeah. Hot seat, unfortunately, is you guys because the All-Star game is a move to Coors Field and the balls are going to fly for the home run.
Yeah, for everyone though, dude. Yeah, exactly.
The concept of altitude doesn't only work on Christian Yelich. I'm nervous.
I looked at the dimensions, Jake. In right field in Cumberland, Georgia at Truist, it's 325 feet.
In Colorado, it's 350 feet, so it's actually harder for a left-handed batter to win the home run derby there we go so cool throne is my butthole all right fair the real cool throne is uh concession prices because patrons are allowed at the masters this year and we're gonna see that tweet somewhere of how cheap everything is yes uh all right my friend uh jp finley from washington dc is going to the masters and he up yesterday, and he said, Do you want anything from the Masters? And I was confused by the question at first because it's like, wait, you can just- Grass. Grass.
I might want- Should have had him bring grass. I could ask him for some grass, but what if he just mailed us a pimento cheese sandwich? That works.
Yeah, no, it's because of all the stuff that they, you know, like the pro shop is- You can't buy it anywhere else. That's right, yeah.
That's right. They don't do licensing.
Okay, cool. So, yeah, I'll ask him for grass and cheese.
Do you, his question would have been better asked, do you want people to ask if you've been to the Masters and then you have to say no? Yeah. Because that's really all that would happen if you wore a Masters, official Masters ad.
People would be like, oh, sick, what year did you didn't jp got me this yeah so jp if you're listening right now just send us a sandwich and maybe some shavings from the fourth fairway yes there we go and steal steal one flag stick and a pig in a blanket you get to decide which flag stick you want to steal uh all right let's do jimmy tatro awesome interview uh before we got that get, PFT, you had a quick word from our friend. We're going to get right back to the show.
The last thing you want to hear when you need your auto insurance most is a robot with countless irrelevant menu options, which is why with USAA Auto Insurance, you'll get great service that is easy and reliable, all at the touch of a button. Get a quote today.
Restrictions apply. USAA.
All right, back to part of my take. The interview is also brought to you by our great...
We're going to get right back to the show. Building a business may feel like a big jump, but OnDeck small business loans can help keep you afloat.
With lines of credit up to $100,000 and term loans up to $250,000, OnDeck lets you choose the loan that's right for your business. As a top-rated online small business lender, OnDeck's team of loan advisors can help you find the right business loan to fit your needs.
Visit OnDeck.com for more information. Depending on certain loan attributes, your business loan may be issued by OnDeck or Celtic Bank.
OnDeck does not lend in North Dakota. All loans and amounts subject to lender approval.
All right, back to part of my take. Now here he is, Jimmy Tatro.
Okay, we now welcome on our good friend, recurring guest, recurring guest Hall of Famer, Jimmy Tatro. He's got a new show.
It is called Home Economics. It's on ABC.
Don't know if you heard of it, but Jimmy is now a sitcom star.

So my first question is about the show.

I watched the trailer.

It's Home Economics.

Also, Topher Grace is on it, who is a recurring guest as well.

It's about a family, and it's three siblings.

One of the siblings is a one percenter, one middle class, and one barely holding on.

Jimmy is the one percenter. Was this method acting for you? You know, it's funny is when I told my mom about the concept of the show, she was like, did you write it? I was like, no, mom, I didn't.
It's just an ABC show. I got cast in.
Oh, OK. like, I don't know.
It kind of sounds like our life. So wait, what is, I mean, it is a big deal.
You're on ABC now. I don't want to say you've made it, but you've kind of made it.
You could say made it or you could say sold out. Yeah, you sold out, made it.
You are now like, I'm happy that you even gave us this time because you're basically an a-lister uh but when you found out about getting cast on this like how does that work you must have been like holy shit this is pretty sick yeah to be honest i kind of went back and forth about it for a while i was just a little scared of of doing an abc show um just because it seemed a little different than what I usually do um but like I really liked the pilot script it didn't feel like corny and uh and I you know I was I was a little nervous going in but like every script that I read it just they they just kept getting funnier and i actually was like oh i'm really i'm really liking these scripts which was a pleasant surprise um so yeah it was it was easy to be hyped once we were actually shooting and and uh it was actually a lot of fun yeah so it must be a lot different because you do come from a background where you can do pretty much whatever the fuck you want as your comedy like if you if you have your own youtube page you're basically you know no one's telling you what you can and can't say now you're on network tv is there anything that you've like had to adjust or like tone down going to abc yeah i i think just just kind of going to just acting in general there's a lot of things like you got to tone down from doing, you know, your own stuff on YouTube. You just got to kind of realize you're just you're just playing a role.
You're just a piece of the puzzle. You can't really dictate the creative direction of things when you're just an actor, which is something like early on, it was kind of hard to, you know, it's hard when you don't agree creatively with things coming from a place where you're used to like calling the shots.
So I just kind of made, made sure to only choose things from here on that I like, I'm actually on board with because when I'm not, I can't even fake it yeah are you gonna get advertisements for your show on like uh on like Disney shows and uh ESPN like live sports I always love it when Jim Nance has to talk about like a new sitcom that he's obviously never watched so he's like he's in the middle of the the final four and he's like make sure to check out Chad debuting next week on CBS like are you gonna to get Mike Tirico tossing you up I guess it would be Mike I actually I'm not going to lie I looked up because I know the show comes out on April 7th and I like looked up I like did the math to see if we'd get any NBA finals love I think the finals is a little after us that would been nice. Are you worried at all about becoming America's heartthrob? No, not really.
No, I don't know if – I'm open to it. Okay.
Yeah. And also what you guys were saying earlier about – I know, I know you brought up the word sellout.

I get that, you know.

But what we were talking about last time, you know, about me being an up-and-comer.

You know, would you say that this changes that?

Yeah, you just came.

You've arrived.

Yeah, you came and you've arrived.

Yes, yes.

You got that post-nut clarity right now. You're about to do do your best work i yeah i don't think you're a sellout i just think that um yeah you know you actually are definitely a sellout uh officially a sellout but sometimes i feel that way too this is why pft and i have never done an abc sitcom like we've been offered many times i think actually pft was offered for your role i was offered for tophers and we both said no thanks people will be like oh what sellout so uh i saw on the casting description they were going after a pft type yeah yeah they were actually i think i was probably gonna be the homeless guy i think that's you mixed it up they couldn't get you so they settled for so actually, honestly, it's our dream to sell out.
I think it should be everybody's dream to sell out. So, really sell out just means that you've got a bigger audience and you're getting paid a shitload of money to do it.
And a Tesla. And a Tesla.
Do you have a Tesla? I do have a Tesla. Oh, shit.
In my defense, in my defense, I already had the Tesla before the exhibition. Oh, okay.
So you bought it on credit. I like that.
A little overextension before you got this. Wait, did you pay full price? Did you buy it online? Did you click the thing? And then you're like, oh, fuck, I just bought a Tesla.
No, I won it through david dobrik one of david dobrik's giveaways oh i yes yeah jake here has one steve will do it got him one so uh yeah i was really lucky but i commented i think a thousand times and i followed everyone that he followed and i entered to win and you know what i. Yeah, I love those giveaways.
They're so funny because it's just the most random people end up with Teslas. Like I saw the Nelk boys gave some random, probably 18-year-old kid in New Hampshire a Tesla.
I love it when they don't seem that excited, too, like the winner. They FaceTime the winner, and the winner is like, oh yeah and they're like it's me yeah i'm facetiming you aren't you fucking thrilled and they're like yeah that's that's cool i love the idea of giving a tesla to somebody in the middle of like i don't know like yeah like new hampshire vermont and then it breaks down and they have to pay ten thousand dollars for a replacement part no charging situation yeah there's no superchargers within like a 1 000 mile radius i want to get back real quick before we started actually taping this you were telling a story about a beehive in your backyard that is actually it's fascinating to me so you you had a pretty substantial beehive right behind you i was enthralling i followed it very closely yeah um i mean i like to say if if you were a bee living in la in 2020 you either lived at my hive or you knew someone who did i love it's like studio 54 new york club i actually wanted to do like a to do like a little mockumentary called The Place to Be.
That was like a studio, it's 54 type documentary about like the hottest beehive. But then I figured no one will think this is funny except me probably.
No, no, that was, wait, so The Place to Be. No, that's funny.
Yeah, that's that's great i don't know i'm just a bit wrong here but uh about the being it was really fucking big like it was probably like i'm not kidding it was like four feet high and um i was out of town i think this was like last april maybe may and And my roommate calls me freaking out. And he's like, dude, like I can barely understand.
Dude, the hive went down, man. The hive went down.
There's fucking bees everywhere, dude. Fuck.
And it went down and there was like thousands and thousands of bees just swarming. And I didn't get home for like another two weeks.
So had all kind of they had all kind of died damn um and i was pretty sad because i felt like i was doing good things for the b population yeah do you feel like you feel like maybe that's that's a metaphor for your life like you you're now on abc mr big shot getting too big you might fall off that branch. Whoa.
Yeah. Sorry.
I always take these things, man. They just kind of – Sorry for going there.
That might be too deep. Yeah.
Pretty deep. I wasn't ready to dive into that.
I hope not. I like to think that all the branches I'm jumping to, I've tested to make sure they're sturdy enough to hold the hive.
I want to harvest on that branch. Yeah.
Not to sound like a stalker. I mean, I follow you on Instagram.
We talk every now and then. But you also, over the summer, you did some traveling.
And you did, like, the cool guy living out of a van thing. Made it look really awesome.
What was the coolest place you went in america it doesn't sound like that unique of a thing to say but it was definitely yellowstone um i mean i saw a lot of cool cool places like bryce canyon was was really cool and uh you know there's a lot of like cool places up the california coast um the o really beautiful. But Yellowstone just has it all.
You know, there's just like the wildlife, the waterfalls, the lakes, the meadows. Like it literally checks every nature box you could possibly.
You know, the geysers, hot springs. So I'd say Yellowstone.
Yeah. Did you see any cool wolves up there? I love the Yellowstone wolves.
I saw some big-ass bison, which was a little scary, but pretty cool. I think bison kill 10 people a year up in Yellowstone, right? Because people try to take selfies with them.
They have to put up signs everywhere saying like, don't get too close to these buffalo.

They will just straight up run you over.

Oh, I didn't know that people were dying,

but I did see some of these signs.

I was more worried about driving into one of them

because I feel like that would kill me

if I saw a bison.

For sure. Absolutely would.

Where did you shit?

Where'd I stay?

Where'd you shit? I saw all your pictures

and it looked like it was out of a magazine.

It was like, this is so romantic. You're in a

Thank you. um where did you shit where'd i stay where'd you shit i saw all your pictures and it looked like it was out of a magazine it was like this is so romantic you're in a van and it's all like the bed is made and these cool pictures and i always think like that's such a cool life but you're on the road and you're probably eating combos and twizzlers you gotta shit somewhere yeah i think mostly i mean you know we cheated a little bit like we didn't sleep in the van every night ah that's the sellout move i like it yeah we were we were staying at some at some nice hotels too we do the same thing i was gonna say when we did group week in california and we rented that sweet ass van yeah we're like yeah we're just gonna live in the van for a week i think we stay at the marina del rey yeah we were we were staying in a nice place so yeah that is a little a little trick of the trade a little you know behind the fourth fifth wall or whatever you call it sometimes you gotta stay at a nice hotel to get a shower right the trick of the trade is like about the van life is like every now and then you gotta stay at a little five-star hotel here and there that's part of being a van guy put your feet up right exactly i like that you also pick probably the the perfect time to do something like that like get out be kind of out in nature for a while when every city was pretty much shut down and really i know it's funny like reflecting on 2020 and i'm like man 2020 was so fucking terrible and like we just locked up inside like what'd you do? I was like, nah, travel the world.
Yeah.

Shit.

Hey. terrible and like we just locked up inside like what'd you do man travel the world hey maybe i shouldn't say that but you know i was like in a camper van like you know traveling america seeing sights and like i i mean i already told you this last time but i got it in like you know last march like a year ago so i ago.
So I, for some time I was like, you know, I got the antibodies, I'm invincible. So I was like, you know, riding that wave for a bit.
Yeah. I'm a COVID survivor as well.
So shout out to all right. Yeah.
So do you have the fog brain? The what? Like a COVID fog brain? Big cat likes to say. I want to say yes.
I just can't tell if that's COVID or if that's just, you know, me. Yes.
Yeah, I'm just getting dumber and older. Yeah, I'm like, is this COVID or am I just, like, stupid? Yes.
Stupid is the answer most of the time. When is the next Real Bros of Simi Valley? I'm working on that right now.
We're trying to make, you know, I want to just finish the show. We know how the show needs to end, and we want to end the show.
There's a couple things that we need to work out, you know, with where it's going to be. I'm not sure how much I'm allowed to say about it, but...
Well, I brought it up because... We're trying to make it happen.
I want to make more. Okay.
I brought it up because how can you work us into the script for a quick cameo? That would be appreciated. Because I do love the show.
That would be no problem. If we

make a season four happen,

that is, you know, we'll make

sure to get some

PMT involved.

Or at the very least, some part of my

flakes will be consumed. Yes.

I like that. No shrimp tails.

That's a guarantee.

I'm just a big fan.

I love some puns. And when I

saw that you guys were rocking with

Thank you. I like that.
No shrimp tails. No shrimp tails.
That's a guarantee. I just am a big fan.
You know, I love some puns. And when I saw that you guys were rocking with pardon my flakes, I was just like.
It was almost pardon my Jake's. And then that's the reason why we left his name off the word search on the back.
Unfortunately, he was pretty broken up about that. But for clarification, Jake should have been on the back.
He's looking at me me like he's angry uh yeah it's tough do you think that that comedy in the year 2020 is going to age as badly as i think that it's going to age like everybody making the exact same jokes about zoom meetings social distancing face masks like i feel like no one's going to want to go back in time and and listen to anything that came out in the 2020. I agree.
And that's why I've like shied away from like early on. I was like, should we write something, you know, about this or like write a, you know, some kind of spin on the pandemic.
And I was like, I don't want to watch that. Like when I'm watching it, like when I'm selecting anything on TV right now, I don't want to watch anything that has to do with 2020, a pandemic or even life on earth right now.
I just want to watch like space stuff. And like, you know, I want to be, I want to be in like the Marvel universe or like some other universe.
I I'm like, I'm not, I don't even want to watch stuff that has to do with this planet right now yeah yeah i mean it's definitely true um so do you think that the lakers might win their first title with lebron this year i see what you did there well it didn't count you agreed you actually were here i remember you were here in the middle of summer you're like this this one clearly doesn't count i don't know if those were my words i feel like i i don't know if i said that actually um i think i definitely said it counted you definitely said all of those words yeah i don't know if it was in that order they weren't in that order like you could have so you agree you said it. A Franken-bite of me saying that sentence.

Saying what?

Shit.

Damn, he doesn't have the fog brain.

Damn.

I think the Lakers have a chance if we can

get healthy.

So,

you obviously don't want to see the Lakers win. Who do you want to see win less, the Lakers or the Nets? We love the Nets.
We love the Nets. We're good friends with Blake Griffin, not to name drop, but he is one of our best friends in the whole world.
So we are big-time Nets guys now.

And also we came to the realization, actually the show we taped last night,

that the Nets are, they have to be like the least imposing fan base

and like championship that could happen.

Like no one's going to bother you.

No Nets fan is going to bother you.

And I always judge, like if my teams can't win, I judge on like, hey, why don't we have the Padres win? I don't know any Padres fans. Like, throw that out there so that you just don't get bothered by it.
I get that no one being bothered by Nets fans, but I'm bothered by the Nets. Why? Oh, you think that it's not right that they made a super team, unlike everything LeBron's done? I guess every team KD goes to, he makes them whack, you know? I love the Warriors.
The Warriors were cool, you know? They had their thing going, and then KD showed up to the party and was like, wait, guys, include me. And I hated the Warriors.
And then, you know, he went to the Nets, and now they're like, you know, they need every single day.

They need six superstars.

If they don't win the championship, they're so whack.

Oh, you're doing that.

Okay.

I do respect that, though, because we're saying the exact same thing about the Lakers with LeBron.

But I mean, every argument that you make against KD, you can make the exact same argument against LeBron.

Yeah.

No, no.

Yeah. LeBron has won with like no help.
What? What? When was that? Did I miss that? LeBron. Della Vidova.
Yeah. Fucking.
Kyrie Irving. Kyrie.
Yeah. Yeah.
Great team. No help.
None. None whatsoever.
They were hurt. No.
No. That was before.
Yeah, that was the year when they lost. When Kevin Love hurt his shoulder and Kyrie broke his kneecap? Yeah.
Yeah. Because you remember Kevin Love put the lockdown on Steph Curry on that last three.
Yeah. And then Kyrie was the one that won that championship.
Yes, he did. With that three-pointer.
Yes, he did. You guys are saying that you're equating lebron to kd right now no no we're saying everything that lebron has done and i have no problem with super teams if you look at the history of the nba there's always been a super team it's just this is more player movement which is good because players should get to decide where they're going but lebron has done everything like if the lakers are talking about getting like, LeBron, AD, yeah, obviously I'm thrilled about that.

But then when they start talking about getting like Kawhi

on top of that, I'm like, eh.

There was a story.

I'm not like opening, like welcoming a super team.

I'm just like, I want to win, but I don't want everyone

to hate us the way that I hate the Nets right now.

Windhorse just had a report that LeBron has been actively recruiting Steph. I did see that.
I did see that, but that's not going to happen. That's not going to come to the Lakers.
That's totally different. Actually, I just realized, congratulations, we played ourselves.
Every single argument that we're giving to you about why you shouldn't hate KD, we're also making to ourselves about why we shouldn't hate LeBron. No, but that's...
It is different. It's LeBron.
It's totally different. It's LeBron.
Yeah. KD needs the help.
It's fine. Whatever.
KD sucked. LeBron, I mean, you know, KD made Thunderstruck.
The movie. I did not see that.
No. Oh, wait.
No. What? Is that a real movie? Yeah.
Oh, it's a kids movie? It looks like a Disney Channel movie starring Kevin Durant. That's awesome.
Good for him. I'm going to watch it with my son.
But that's the Thunderstruck one, right? It's the first Thunderstruck. He's not writing.
I'm not happy about Space Jam 2. I wish Space Jam 2 wasn 2 wasn't happening yeah did you get a call for that i didn't no and that's why i wish it wasn't happening yes exactly um how happy were you on a scale of one to ten though when the clippers imploded last year pretty happy i you know we talked about this last time the clippers are, always, they just were getting ahead of themselves, and it was nice to see them get checked.
Yeah. No, I mean, it was funny to see, like, a team that everyone had anointed, myself included, fall apart in such a hilarious, like, in terrible fashion that they did.
Right. You know, it's like when you're playing against your little brother in one brother and one-on-one and you want to give them some points so that, you know, he feels like we're playing here.
Right. Right.
So do you actually, you actually hate the Clippers? Oh, yeah. I hate the Clippers.
I didn't used to hate the Clippers. Like, you know, back in the day when the Clippers just knew that they were, they didn't matter.
I didn't care about the Clippers. It was just that once they started getting a little bit good, all of a sudden these Clipper fans, everyone wants to talk now.
Where were you? Where have you been when freaking Darius Miles was, where were you then? Where were you when, you know, what's the guy I'm blanking on his name. Corey McGetty with the freaking headbands around his biceps.

That was a great look.

Yup.

So according to you,

what would,

uh,

what would a franchise like the Clippers have to do?

Like you said that they,

they didn't take the baby steps.

They went too big,

too fast in your mind.

What's like an appropriate way to change a franchise around.

That would be okay with you as a Lakers fan. Just silently winning.
Silently being good for a little bit before you just start yapping. Okay.
That's tough to do, though. Very tough to do.
Yeah. Win with grace.
Win with class. Act like you've been there before even though you haven't? Yeah.
Okay. I got that.

Do you feel like you were slighted

or that the entire film was slighted

for King of Staten Island

for not getting nominated for an Oscar?

I don't know.

I mean, I thought it was great.

I thought it was a great movie.

I honestly didn't see any of the Oscar-nominated movies. I just feel like they're all so heavy.
You know, it's like whenever I sit down to watch a movie, it's not really choosing those ones. It just feels too too.
Oh, Jesus. People are going to be so mad about that.
We get that all the time whenever one of our phones goes off. People are like, God damn it.
That's okay. That was Jimmy's fault.
He's an A-lister. Who was that on the other line? Was that Tom Hanks? That was my girlfriend calling.
Oh, sick brag. He's got a Tesla and a girlfriend.
Damn. White boy summer.
Do you know Chet Hayes? I don't know Chet Hanks, but I have obviously heard of chet hanks yeah he makes me laugh yes he's going like i he's similar to kevin durant in that i used to hate him and now i actually think he's one of the funniest people on the planet you think kevin is one of the funniest people on the planet oh he's more likable is is what i'm saying like when he was going at ha ha ha you fuck you mike rapaport in his dms like that's objectively funny to have you know one of the best basketball players on earth calling this failed actor a cocksucker but the yeah i think i agree with like i hadn't heard of chet hanks before because people were telling me like you know you should get this guy in real bros um and then like i just started seeing the white boy summer stuff and i think what really made me laugh was just him him opening the video with what's up loved ones yeah or no he says you know what's really cool he goes i'm gonna tap in real quick that's a very cool way of saying you're on instagram i think you should like the reason why chet hanks is so funny is that we're all laughing at him, not with him, really, because he doesn't realize like that. The picture where he he took on a plane where he didn't have a mask on.
He's like, we haven't been able to take off because there's someone not wearing their mask. He didn't have a mask in sight.
Like it was a selfie. It was like, dude, you're the person.
So I think you should invite him to Real Bros of See Me and not give him a script or anything. And just let him kick it.
And I think you would get gold. You might be right.
You might be right. Just let him improv.
It's real. It's actually happening.
Hide the cameras even. Yeah, be like, it's a real reality show.
And we just want you to come hang at this kickback, and he would like, I think he would be a breakout star on that show, and he'd probably be like, those guys, he'd be like, Xander's the fucking sweetest. Like, I want to hang with that guy.
Yeah, and then I take this soul patch off, and he's just like. Whoa, dude.
Whoa, whoa, whoa. His brain falls apart, yeah.
On that selfie that he put up he actually goes we keep the plane can't take off because some idiot won't wear their mask and it wasn't like a mask on his neck it wasn't like he had a mask on his neck or anything he had no mask in sight that's why i love him he is a character he's he's a character so he's funny to observe what i want to like hang out with him or co-sign on a loan for him no but he's fun to just look at you know I just thought that I saw that meme that was like it's an excellent case study of if you name your kid Chet you get a Chet and if you name your kid Colin you get a Colin yes his brother is like the polar opposite yes yeah Tom Hanks knew what he was doing he was like is my Chet. I'm going to party with this one when he gets older.
The other one is going to take care of me when I'm in a nursing home and pay for my bills. So good.
This is where Cali culture is at, though. Have you had a realization? Because I do think a lot of American culture comes from California, and now Chet Hayes is kind of the's kind of the president yeah he's the forefront he is the the president of California culture which de facto makes him the president of all American culture wow that escalated quickly wow he really he really just stepped into the forefront of American culture there well you don't choose a position the position chooses you He was the right man at the right time Although he made one misstep I thought So White Boy Summer started out it was fun I feel like everyone could get behind it was a positive movement And then he put out the White Boy Summer merch Which which had severe American Chopper-style calligraphy writing

for White Boy Summer, and it put that sinister vibe on it.

So he just needs a better merch guy.

Soften it.

I think in Chet's defense, if you go, like, hey, build a T-shirt,

it was the first font.

Yeah.

So I don't think that it's really his fault.

He thought maybe there was only one font yeah so i don't think that it's really his fault he just he thought maybe there was only one font available and it was the same font of the last name that he tattooed across his back yes he just loves it it's the sublime font yeah that's what it is he's he's been looking at the back of the self-titled album for too long he's like that should go on the back the back of every single T-shirt. Yeah, every book should be written in this font.
That's, I think, the only font you're allowed to tattoo on your back if you're doing last names. Does he have the last name across? I would guess he does have the last name across on your back.
I mean, I think it's a pretty good bet that he does. He's got like an A.J.
McCarron thing going on on his chest, I think. I don't know what's on his back.
Maybe angel wings. Yeah.
I mean, I like his tattoos. He definitely has the tattoos I wish I had.
Do you have tattoos? I don't. I wish I had a tattoo.
Do you have a tattoo? I don't. You know why? It's because when I was like 13, 12, I was so passionate about getting a barbed wire fence tattoo on my bicepp like i just wanted that so badly and i wanted it for like five years and then one day i snapped out of it and i was like that would be so whack if i got that i think it's starting to play now yeah dude pamela anderson brian urlacher yeah there's some there's some and i wanted that and i wanted you and also wanted i wanted the jordan jump man on my cat i love when people get brands tattooed on their body and i thought like you know that was how i designed all my characters and like nba they all had those tattoos and then i snapped out of it and i was like damn like i wanted both for a really long time.
Yeah. And I haven't had any ideas that I've loved for more than like five years.
So I've refrained. I think I'm going to get a plaid half sleeve on my right arm.
No, you can't. I've never seen a plaid tattoo.
Oh, strictly for buckets on the left end. No.
White Boy Summer is very clearly no plaid. No, it's no flannel.
Big difference. Oh, okay.annel and i'm not gonna get no flannels or did he say no plaid because he said no flannel he was very specific about saying no flannel and i'm not gonna get the tattoo i've just been saying that for like seven years it's it's a great go-to if someone's like do you have a tattoo no but i'm gonna get a half sleeve of plaid it's gonna then you just never do it.
So, yeah, that's kind of where I'm stuck. I wish I had one.
You also have to be in tattoo shape, and I don't think I'll ever be in tattoo shape. Yeah, but you could be in, I mean, not like, you know, like jacked up, ripped tattoo shape, but you could be in like cool tattoo shape, you know? Yeah.
Like have some random words. Maybe if the Nets, yeah, maybe if the Nets win the title, I'll do like a Brooklyn, you know, sleeve on all the Nets players.
A mosaic. I'm going to get James Harden's stomach tattooed on my stomach.
Yeah, LaMarcus Aldridge doing a set shot right on my forearm. It'll be beautiful.
Jimmy, when was the last time you shaved the stache? Have you had that for like, what, six years?

No, this was actually,

I had like a attempt at a beard

during the shooting of the show.

And then they wanted to do a flashback

where I was supposed to look different.

So I convinced him to let me go mustache

and I ended the show with a mustache

just like I planned.

Ooh, spoiler, dude. Oh, fuck.
Nah, that's not a spoiler. Okay, all right.
Good. I assume that you're at the level in Hollywood now where you can just pitch a show and it gets greenlit immediately because you're an A-lister and you drive a Tesla.
So when I was looking up the details about your new show, I Googled it. I think I just Googled Jimmy Taito, a new show.
And the first thing that popped up was a Peaky Blinders type movie that's coming out. And I thought for a second you were doing a comedy spoof of Peaky Blinders.
And I was like, that's going to be fucking awesome. You should do that.
I feel like you'd play really good Arthur Shelby or Tommy Shelby, but a funny version of of it and maybe one we don't have to watch with the subtitles on. Wow.
I feel like this is something you probably should have texted me because someone's going to take this. No, but it's only starring.
Oh, shit. Is that your agent? Tell them about the idea.
That's Jimmy's agent. He's going to be in the next Avengers.
I would love to be in the next Avengers. Oh, and he'sinking at us now so it's clear that he's already been cast damn i would love that um all right so i had one last question it's a rowback question uh use code awl on rowback.com for 20 off your first purchase r-h-o-b-a-c-k.com and we're going to give you aip on us, which you don't even need, but you use it for like a dog bed or something because you're so rich.
But Roback does make unbelievable Q-Zips, and we love their gear. So check them out, Roback.com.
Use code AWL. All right, elevator pitch.
The Home Economics premieres on Wednesday night, April 7th, on ABC abc 8 30 i want to say uh why do people have to watch it and should they tweet at you uh pictures of your face zoomed in and like shit like that yeah for sure uh send me pictures of uh of the screen you know that's always a great marketing tactic.

Why would you want it um it's you know it's fun it's it's easy watching and it's funny you know and it's uh it's not it's not like a a heavy thing to consume right now which i feel like a lot of things are jam-packed with trying to tell you something or make you more woke about certain things. And that's cool.
But this is like a fun family comedy show for when you just want to chill out at nighttime and have a good time i like which i think people are yeah are you gonna watch it yeah yeah yeah yeah i saw the first two episodes and they're they're pretty good okay uh and you're rich in it which is cool and and i'm rich in it yeah yeah yeah which is i didn't get to drive the car the car that they had for me, which was upsetting. Was it just a lesser version of the Tesla you own? You're like, I don't want to drive this.
No, it was like a little two-door Mercedes that was just parked in front of my house the whole time. And I never like got to pull in.

You know, I never got to like drive it up.

So it was a little dissonant. But you know, that's why we're fingers crossed for season two.

Yeah.

Yo, you get to drive the car.

You live out of the car season two.

That's actually, that's the reason why people should watch it.

We want a season two and we want Jimmy to be successful

because then we can be like, hey, we knew him

before he was America's heartthrob. Sure.
The next Chet Hanks. Yes.
That's what people are calling you. Yes.
Yes. All right, we're going to hit it there.
He's going to be the next Chet Hanks. Thanks for coming on, Jimmy.
No, watch the show. Well, I don't know about that.
If enough people watch, me and Big Cat will be in Real Bros.

Yes, there it is.

And Hank.

Especially Jake.

Especially Jake because he didn't get on the box of cereal.

Yeah, if season two happens, then we'll all be on Real Bros.

We'll just use it that way.

Sure. Yeah, exactly.
You guys will be on will be on that's a good incentive right there yeah and if it gets a season three uh jimmy will get a barbed wire tattoo yeah you know we'll cross that bridge when we get there okay so that sounds like a deal perfect uh jimmy thank you as always. Always fun, man.
And good luck with the launch of the show.

We will be watching.

I'm excited for it.

Yeah.

Thanks for having me on, guys.

Good to see you, as always.

Jimmy Tatro is brought to you by Barstool Golf Time app.

The golf season is in full swing.

Now is the perfect time to get out on the course.

If you're trying to book a tee time, you should look no further, we're officially announcing the launch of the barstool golf time app in partnership with Supreme golf. The barstool golf time allows you to book tee times at thousands of courses.
It's the easiest way to get a tee time after you book, take a picture or video of the course that you're on, submit your official review. Riggs, Frankie, Trent and Lurch's reviews are on the app as well, so you can join them along with your friends.
Other cool features like Barstool Golf Rewards to get free merch will be rolling out soon. So don't be an idiot.
If you're a golfer, download the Barstool Golf Time app today. It's now available in the App Store.
Okay, let's finish up. We got some FAQs.
Oh, huge guest on friday by the way massive future hall of famer for sure some say no i would definitely say i also say that hank's best friend great looking dude uh what is the best color for cheese yeah bonk Gotcha. Best color for cheese?

Pimento. What question is that? What is the best color for cheese? I had a cab driver once from LaGuardia who was like, if you want to live to 100, you got to eat only white cheese.
He's like, the minute you eat yellow cheese, you're going to kill yourself. You miss out on the sweet creaminess of Velveeta cheese.
No, but he said that. I was like, and he said it was, he was kind of like Brandon Marshall.
He said it was such authority that I was like, damn, is he, he must be right. I will eat cheese no matter the color, except blue cheese, blue cheese.
Favorite cheese. If you had to go with one cheese, uh, magnolia mud queso.
Mmm. It's white.
I don't know if I'd go. Queso is a bunch of cheeses combined.
No, it's white cheese, Hank you had to go with one cheese. Magnolia mud queso.

It's white.

I don't know if I'd go... Queso is a bunch of cheeses combined.

No, it's white cheese, Hank.

You've never had it, so you wouldn't know.

I don't know if I'd go smoked...

No, but queso is melted cheese.

Yes.

Smoked gouda or...

So just take the hard cheese.

Pick a hard cheese.

You can't say melted cheese.

Hard cheese.

Cheese and crackers.

White cheddar.

I was going to say either extra sharp cheddar or smoked gouda, but I'm going to go with extra sharp cheddar. I'll say this.
I like American cheese. I don't care who knows it.
American cheese tastes good. American cheese is more just a volume shooter thing.
I could just pop them. Cross signals.
Rhea judges me for eating cross signals. It's like a snack.
Dude, I have string cheese on deck all the time. It's awesome.
So white is the answer? Parmesan? Out of context. That's not great.
You could take a lot of things on the show out of context. It wouldn't be great.
You don't want to start playing that game. Not with me.
Not with the editor. Oh, shit.
Yes. I'm going through all the clips.

Yes, I'm trusting the cab driver.

All right.

The cab driver was right.

He said it, and I didn't even ask.

He just was like, what's up, man?

You eat cheese?

I was like, yeah.

Look at me.

He's like, better eat white.

I was like, okay.

Fuck.

Whites only?

Yeah, pretty much.

Okay.

It's crazy.

Can you differentiate between the top and bottom of a tube of toothpaste? Please explain. What? Yeah, one's got a hole.
I think he means like... The hole is a giveaway.
I think he's saying the toothpaste inside. Yeah, the part that has the ingredients.
Is it better? That's the bad. Like a coffee.
Like is it, you know, top of a coffee versus bottom of a coffee? Oh, yeah, yeah.

The first squeezes are always great.

Yes.

I've been working on the last three squeezes of my current tube for,

it feels like a month, but I'm getting a decent chunk out of it.

I'm getting a good load for my toothpaste container every night.

I just don't think that there's an end to it.

The other move is the body wash and just adding water and just letting it keep going. And it's just like, at the end, I'm just washing with water.
It's like a little soapy water. Oh, I've done that before.
Yeah, shampoo. Open up the top, get some water in it, mix it up.
You got fucking new body wash, baby. You can do that with shampoo for like three different washes after it's over.
Yes, no, eventually you are just. Or with NyQuil.
It's just like dull, lightly soapy water that you're washing yourself with. That's actually a good invention for you, Hank.
You should pour the Listerine into the toothpaste container, and then you get best of both worlds at the very end. All right.
This one was long, so I haven't actually read it, but I'm going to give it a shot. If it doesn't make sense halfway through, I'll stop.
No, you got this. Alright, was that more because you were going to say some words wrong? A little bit.
Hey, Horny, Hank, PFT, Bonk Mentor, and Bonk Cat, why the fuck do you continue to let William Football convince you that ketosis is a good idea? First and foremost, there is nothing to prove that three balanced meals a day plus exercise isn't the best possible diet and exercise routine. Ketosis has only been proven safe and effective in the short term.
People who use ketosis as a quick weight loss trick are super prone to gaining lots of weight back when you relapse. Your body was literally designed to create energy from glucose, which is released...

Yeah? Which is released...

I lost my spot.

Oh, no. You took a victory lap

after glucose. You were crushing that.

You did just look up and be like, you hear that? Glucose.

Glucose is a very sad word for you

to do a celebration. Like spiking a football

after you pronounce G-L-U-C-O-S-E.

I wanted to say

glu-so-see, but I didn't. Your body was literally designed to create energy from glucose, which is released from a breakdown of carbs.
Besides that, a balanced diet gives you more freedom to eat things that you like, even bad things in moderation. You should be thinking 50% carbs, 30% protein, 20% fats, plus exercise.
Billy is a smart kid, but just because he knocked the shit out of Jose doesn't mean he knows what's best for your health take it from a medical student not Billy I want you guys to succeed on your weight loss journey so thank you to this person but PFT and I had a conversation yesterday and we have also come to this conclusion yeah so we did a little bit of independent research and found out that ketosis is like the worst diet to go on if you have a history of kidney stones which I know Billy you don't listen to every single show but both me and Big Cat had kidney stones in the last month so that probably should have been a red flag for you also I want to take a little bit of exception to what this person said in the text when they're like you can eat everything that you want in moderation I think they're misunderstanding what makes these crash diets so appealing to big cat and me and people like us which is i want a diet where when someone's explaining to me they say you get to eat all of the blank that you want it doesn't matter what goes in that blank but if somebody's like you can eat all the meat that you want i'm like i'm in that's ketosis and not only that but i also like the diets where it's like do this diet for seven days and you'll lose 45 pounds yeah so in actuality i do know that but the thing is oh so you're trying to kill us no no i do know yes play the token ceo if you get them oh you know if you get them to try to do a diet with So their diet right now is probably 90% carbs. That's not true at all.
I don't eat carbs anymore. So if you tell them no carbs, then they're going to end up with that 50% carbs, 30% protein, 20% fats, and other stuff.
So it's kind of like shoot for the moon, land of the stars type thing. You don't know anything about astronomy.
So you're saying we're going into ketosis knowing there's no chance they go into ketosis. Right, but they end up eating a balanced diet because of it.
No, see, Billy is... Billy is claiming that he's doing to us what he would have to do to himself to go on a diet, which is just lie to you, and then knowing that you're going to lie back.
They are. Yeah, it's pretty much...
Yeah. I mean, PFT just nailed it.
No, PFT just nailed it. You lie so much that you just assume we'll lie to you.
No, you lied to me when you did ketosis. You never got into ketosis.
I was in ketosis. I tried.
He pissed. I tried.
But you lost a lot of weight. If you look back at pictures of the summer of 2017, they look super slim.
I mean, the picture game is a game that never works out for anyone.

You videotaped me peeing onto the ketone strips and then put my penis on the internet.

Right, but you got in and out, in and out.

You never stayed fully there.

I'm eating clean Monday through Friday.

That's all you get from me, all right?

And we'll see where it goes.

What was that?

What was that noise?

No, it's just... I think I was Billy happy that you're going to die early.
Mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm out for a spin. It's crazy.
Yeah. Hi, this is Jake.
What would PMT be like today if Barstool Vantalk wouldn't have been canceled? We would all be super mega rich film stars or dead, yeah. Dead.
That's my go-to answer when everyone, if anybody asks me a question like that, it's like, yeah, I would have died within six months. We did it for fucking seven days and I was pooping blood.
That might have been unrelated to the television show. That's neither here nor there.
Yeah, because we kept on going up to ESPN and we kept on getting colony pizza with the hot peppers and it was so good. Yeah.
My dad asked me to look something up on his phone and I noticed he has lots of tabs of porn. Uh-oh.
How do I educate him on incognito mode or do I act like I saw nothing? Cybersecurity is important. It is.
You can use ExpressVPN. I would just not say anything.
You don't want to have that convo with dad. Unless you maybe just send him some recommendations in the future when you stumble across something you think that he'll like.
Sometimes I send my dad an article about BAPIP because I know he'll get into that. Or like horse riding.
Hello, cat commenter can we expect a tandem bicycle ride anytime soon yeah when the weather gets nicer i think that that's the first thing we're going to do i think actually you know what i look this friday it's it's going to rain it is going to rain you know what would be better than because like everyone's like oh yeah pft and big guy we used to do the ride you know what would be even better is if jake and bill did the ride. And we just, you know, saw them during the ride.
We're like, you know, maybe we'll meet them at certain checkpoints. I think that'd be very funny.
How about this? Why don't we cut off like a little bit of our hair, just like a tiny little bit, and we'll give it to them. And that way we'll be going on the ride with you guys.
Do you guys think you could make it around Manhattan working together as a team? I know I i know i can do it oh well that doesn't sound like a team that's exactly the opposite of a team billy did i need to pull some weight when it comes to the uphill portions um but i think i can do most of it okay okay i mean it's an island so it's not really that he's laughing at you right now The Central Park bike route that has some sneaky uphill stuff.

Yeah.

Well, we can avoid the Central Park region because you're doing a lap around the outside of the island. Then, yeah, I should be fine.
Okay. Okay.
Teamwork. Did Miley Cyrus have a better performance than Gonzaga? Yeah, I mean, without a doubt.
She should have been in one shining moment. Gonzaga sucks.
They fucking suck. What's up, fellas? Especially PF3.
My question is for Big Cat. Would you welcome a Savage, especially PFT, but then actually actually.
I think it's actually, it was brutal for both of us. That was a hezy hey.
Would you welcome Matt Ryan to Chicago next season? Yes. Why not? Do you know how bad the Bears quarterbacks have been?

Don't ask me. I'm not the one to ask the question.

Yes. Go down the list.

It's like 40 people.

Teddy Bridgewater.

Sam Darnold.

The AD? Dude, Nick Foles and Teddy Bridgewater in the same locker room?

Sam Darnold. Thoughts and prayers.

I would have tried. Big bonk.

I would have given Sam Darnold a spin. I don't think he's good, but I would have talked myself into it.
It would have been fun to be like, hey, he was number three pick. What's the best thing to do during a solo car ride? Listen to music, listen to podcasts, or call people you haven't talked to in a while? Not the last one, because unless the people that you're calling are also in a car car ride by themselves they can tell that you're getting a call because you're bored sitting in a car i like to do the last one i like to do that because i never talk to people on the phone so it's like almost a throwback just like hey let's chat for catch up for a half hour i just don't think people's like i i'm pretty much at that point like and i feel like Billy is way younger.
I don't think you ever talk to people on the phone.

I would.

But I know.

It's like I don't like talking to people on the phone, but when you're in a long car ride,

it's like, hey, I haven't talked to this person in a long time.

Let me catch up.

I mean, it's kind of nice.

I hate answering my phone.

I never pick it.

I got two calls this morning from my urologist.

Send it to voicemail.

Yep.

Got to.

Fact.

Got to.

I'm like, text me, bro.

Also, I just will throw on a full Grateful Dead or Fish show.

That's always fun. The goat move is just picking up some combos, dyed Dr.
Pepper, some skull pouches, just turning the radio on. Black Buffalo.
Black Buffalo. Who's the sponsor? Black Buffalo, which I do have in my pocket right now.
Which is delicious. It is.
No tobacco. Not a question, just still upset with Big Cat for not being on Texas Tech in 2019 until the national championship.
He is the ultimate mush. Mm-hmm.
Fair. Totally fair.
But you know what? That game brought us Brandon Walker. Brandon Walker doesn't exist if that game doesn't happen.
Also, you are a Chris Beard guy, though. Yeah, I though i love chris so you can just i i'm sure this person would be happy if you just go head over heels into texas basketball no because the company scam people no they they they basically called out dave saying like he wouldn't actually bet like three hundred thousand dollars on texas tech and then he ripped them a new one and then brandon walker came into our What a world.
Yeah. Last one.
With the introduction of vaccinations to the general public, will there be an in-person Grit Week 2021, a Grit Stream 2021, or a mix of both this year? That's a great question. Something that we've discussed.
We're going to try, and it's knock on wood, but we're going to try to combine Training Camp tour and grit week in August. So May's not going to really work because I don't think the world's going to be totally vaccinated by then.
We're not going to get access. But in August, hopefully, the world will be at a place where we can get out on the road, do a full week on the road, go visit some places and have ourselves a fucking great great time i think we probably could get on the road at the end of may but the problem is if we try to go to different facilities it's going to be so near the end of the vaccination period that most teams aren't going to be comfortable bringing strangers that look like us into and i yeah i won't be vaccinated by that point yeah so august well you're not you're never anti ever yeah But but yeah august we haven't we have yet to determine exactly where right yes that is true but we will determine where and it will be fun and you aaron rogers will interview you dude we'll come to you we'll come to you we will take vanny woodhead we'll be spruced up aaron if you're listening we'll let you host just a trivia contest between all of us.
That will be the interview. And all of our questions to you that we're giving are going to be just interview questions.
Yeah. It actually works perfectly in the format.
Yes. Yes.
All right. Is that our show? That's our show.
That's our show. Get excited.
Friday. Future Hall of Famer.
Huge guest. And Masters.
See you then. Love you guys.
Are we going to do a ball? Oh, yeah. Flamingos are born great.
Should I put the balls back in? I kind of like our odds when I keep a few out. We got a thumb on the scale.
I keep a few out. 99.
I usually go to 4. 18.
And then I reset. Jake says 18.
99. 8, 8, 8, 8, 8.
Billy gets 23. 8 almost got that set.
45. Hank's favorite number.
There you go. Love you guys.
Talking away. I don't know what I'm to say.
I'm sage anyway. Today's another day to find you.
Shining away. I've been coming for your love of King.
Shining away. I've been coming for your lover.
Take me away. I'll be coming for your lover.
Take on me. Take me.
I'll be gone. After all.
Take me.ee Only less to say I'm all set in But I'm being stolen A little way Early learning that life is okay Say after me It's no better to be safe Than sorry Say after me It's no better to be safe than sorry Say up to me It's no better to be safe than sorry Take on me Take me on I'll be gone When I talk to you Take on me, take me on, I remember You shine away I'll be gone To be

It's Pardon My Take presented by Barstool Sports