Eli Manning, Masters And Fyre Fest Of The Week

Hey, Pardon My Take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music.
On today's Pardon My Take, we have Eli Manning. Awesome interview with Eli Manning, future Hall of Famer Eli Manning.
We've wanted to interview him for a very long time, and it was fun. It was a great time.
We're going to talk a little Masters. We have Fy have fire fest of the week i got a big announcement oh little teaser there so you're gonna have to listen till the end no spoilers uh and we have a great just friday show gonna have some fun with the boys before we do that shady ray shady rays the official shades a part of my take over the past year thousands of you have joined the team and are rocking their shades daily just like us there's a lot to love about Shady Rays, the official shades, a part of my take.
Over the past year, thousands of you have joined the team and are rocking their shades daily just like us. There's a lot to love about Shady Rays, starting with their best sellers.
The classic black timber polarizes a dual wood frame with black wood texture on the outside, which actually feels like real wood. Shady Rays has your back with one of the most insane warranties, not only on their best sellers, but on all their shades.
Replacement, if lost or broken for any reason. We all know the outdoors can be unpredictable.
So when life happens, Shady Rays has your back with a brand new pair. Even with that strong of a warranty, they will manage to make quality sunglasses that are as good as any.
We're rocking these every day and can attest to the 100,000 plus verified five-star reviews. So here's your chance to get two high-quality pairs of shades for the price of one.
Shop popular styles like the classic black timber and Kalamisa blush. Plus, much more starting at just $48 exclusively for our listeners only.
Head over to ShadyRays.com. Use code PMT for 50% off two or more pairs.
That's code PMT for buy one, get one free shades. Redeemable only at ShadyRays.com where you can find all their newest and best shades.
We love ShadyRays. ShadyRays.com.
Use that promo code PMT. We are rocking them all summer long.
We're also brought to you by our friends at HelloFresh. HelloFresh is a meal delivery service that is incredible.
We all have it. We love it.
HelloFresh cuts out the stressful meal planning and grocery store trips so you can enjoy cooking and get dinner on the table in about 30 minutes or less. Try meals ready in 20 minutes or less.
Lightning

prep recipes and quick breakfasts and lunches. Perfect for your busy schedule.
It's super easy. They deliver it all and you're ready to cook.
And guess what? There's nothing better than a home cooked meal. I had this delicious chicken with rice.
It was an incredible meal, like had some kind of soy glaze and it was so so good and it took me no time to whip up so over four and five hello fresh customers say hello fresh helps them lead a healthier lifestyle because guess what you're not snacking you're not doing it you're eating a good home-cooked meal with delicious low calorie carb smart and vegetarian options available. You can pick your meal plan.
It is also cheaper than shopping at your local grocery store. It is found to be 28% cheaper and 72% cheaper than a restaurant meal without sacrificing that delicious quality.
So go right now to HelloFresh.com slash PMT12, that's PMT12, and use code PMT 12 for 12 free meals, including free shipping. Go to hellofresh.com slash the number one, the number two PMT 12 and use code PMT 12 for 12 meals, including free shipping.
So go again, hellofresh.com use code PMT 12 and you get 12 meals, including free shipping. I love it.
You should love it. We all love it.
So go check it out. America's number one meal kit.
That's their tagline, and I love their tagline as much as I love their meals. HelloFresh.com slash PMT12.
Okay, let's go. Bye.
Bye. Now in the street there is violence And then a lot of stuff, work to be done No place to hang out, no washing And then I can't lay all on the sun Oh no, no.
We're gonna rock down to Electric Avenue. And then we'll take it higher.
Oh, we're gonna rock down to Electric Avenue. It's Pardon My Tape presented by Bob Stoolers.
Welcome to Pardon My Tape presented by HelloFresh.com. Go to HelloFresh.com.
Use code PMT12 for 12 free meals and free shipping. And also ShadyRays.com.
Use that code PMT there and you get 50% off two or more pairs of awesome sunglasses. Today is Friday, April 9th.
I miss Tiger Woods. Yeah.
I tried to put a bet on him as a future to win the Masters, just out of respect, just to get the good luck going. And, you know, the sad thing is if that bet would have hit, I would have donated all the winnings to the control room.
I would have doubled it. Yeah.
I would have doubled it. I would have matched your double.
I would have doubled it, and then I would have tripled the double. So what is that? Compound interest, six, carry the two.
It would have been a lot of money ton of money to the that we were going to give away but i there's something about i mean the masters are great the mat we've had masters without tiger woods but he just feels like the force that is around especially on the thursday and friday it's saturday sunday once we get to moving day which we're golf guys day, yes. It's Saturday.
But once you get to the weekend, the field kind of clears up, and you're like, all right, here's what we got. But the first two days, you're just watching golf, and we're rooting for Brooks.
Brooks is out there. You're trying to see how things shake out.
But Tiger was that force. Yeah, he is the force that would draw you in.
Right now, it's like, yeah, we want Brooks to do what we – it's tough to root for the course at Augusta, too, because in many ways, the course is already Goliath when it comes to the Masters. It is the...
You know, everyone talks about how nice it is. And listening to the broadcast this year, I'm more convinced than ever that the birds are actually piped in crowd noise.
There's one bird in particular. They play its call over and over and over.
It's a cardinal, I think. They're getting sloppy with it.
I think it might be a whippoorwill. Oh.
But whatever it is, it's very obvious. You guys need better birds.
You need a new bird guy on your soundtrack. Yep.
Because it's getting to the point where it's kind of obvious. Yeah.
And this course is playing tough. That's going to be the big story coming out of the first day.
The greens are dry. It's running everywhere.
You want to play early in the day. You want to play early in the day.
You want to hope for a little rain. And Bryson DeChambeau, who has dubbed this a par 67 at the time of this taping, is plus 4.
So more like a par 75? 76? What's par? 71? 72. 76.
did he reveal what was in his bag he was trying to get us all to be interested Bryson did a classic Bryson thing where he's like okay I've got a little bit of goodwill going from the video I've made a friend of Big Cat Big Cat is sweating me right now by the way we're bringing back sweating you were sweating Bryson a little bit did you see the news that we found uh after we taped the show on tuesday that bryson to clear his head before playing in the masters this weekend went and played a little disc golf he banged some chains so he's i actually wouldn't put it past bryson to do everything just to get favor of this podcast yeah well that's not narcissistic at all i just think that he really wants our love if he if he puts a doge uh driver cover on his big boy and it's like 50 inch driver at that point i'll be like yeah bryson to the moon but until that happens when he when he wears a hat that says bears are back yeah i got fucking i'm on to you dude yeah so bryson uh you kind of threw away what little goodwill you had going by doing the whole like Guess what's in my bag this week, and I'm going to you, dude. Yeah, so Bryson, you kind of threw away what little goodwill you had going by doing the whole, like, guess what's in my bag this week? And I'm going to shock the world.
And we're not going to bash Bryson for this whole show. Isn't that a ludicrous song? What in the world's in my bag? Yeah.
Yeah. Come on.
Come on, Bryson. Come on, dude.
But here's the problem with Bryson that, well, he's got a lot of problems. But the biggest issue that he's facing today, and this is very similar to relief pitchers in MLB, when you're bigger and you're doing well, you're strong.
And when you're doing poorly, you're fat. And he looks fat today.
Not to body shame, but there's something about the plus four next to his name that the strength now becomes a little pudgy. Yeah, well, there's that.
And there's also the fact that we also have Patrick Reed out there. And Bryson isn't even the most unlikable, unlikable guy.
Right. That's Patrick.
I somehow like Patrick Reed more because he's more of a villain than Bryson is. I put a future bet on Patrick to win this Masters, mainly because, yes, I would like to hear Jim Nance recite Imagine Dragons lyrics again, but also because he's the ultimate heel in golf.
Bryson is like he's an aspiring heel. Right.
He hasn't embraced it. He still would the difference is Patrick Reed knows everyone hates him and he kind of has just accepted it and he'll complain about rules and his wife will complain about rules and say, oh, everyone's vilifying Patrick.
Bryson, if Bryson could flip the switch and we all just loved him, he would take that. Patrick Reed, I don't think would take that anymore.
He's like, wait, if you all love me, then I can't complain about rules and cheat anymore. No deal.
I can't steal wallets allegedly out of my college roommate's locker room. Right.
Bryson would try to get away with cheating. Patrick Reed would cheat, then get away with it and be like, fuck you guys.
I just cheated and won. Right.
Bryson would be like, I didn't actually cheat. Brooks is out there.
We as a podcast don't make excuses, but I also am just stating a fact. Brooks is playing on basically one leg.
It's probably the most heroic thing I've ever seen in any sport ever. And again, we're not making excuses.
We're not biased. We're stating facts.
This is like Willis Reed. This is Kirk Gibson.
This is all those things. Byron Leftwich being helped down the fairway by his offensive line.
Correct. Everything that you can think of, any of the lowest moments where someone just triumphs over all these injuries and hardships, that's Brooks shooting plus two today.
Yeah, Ian Rappaport tweeted out some report. I don't know if this is a HIPAA violation.
Somehow he got advance notice on what Brooks' injury was. But it sounded like the most painful thing ever.
It was like he had to have two tendons reattached to his shattered patella, and he said that it was a six-month surgery. He's playing on it after one month.
It was so bad of an injury that Hank bet against him. Yeah, Hank bet against him.
Great job, Hank. Hank, a theme of this show is we get someone who's, you know...
Wait, do you guys have a future on him to win the Masters? I didn't bet against him. Oh, you don't bet against him.
No, you don't bet against him. So you don't think he's going to win the Masters? Hank, I don't bet on him.
Because I put my money where my mouth is and bet on him on a future to win the Masters. I don't bet on him to lose against Bubba Watson today.
Yeah, it's a little bit of a Billy football, you know, hedge yourself. No, I don't bet on people that we have inside information on him.
Or maybe he was going to come out because Big Cat was saying, like, his knee's kind of messed up. He might come out, try too hard, and realize that it's not his year and have a bad round.
So I bet against him in the first round. But I believe in him for the full tournament.
Here's the thing you don't understand, Hank. When you love someone as much as I love Brooks Koepka, I don't need to put money down.
You know what my future is on Brooks Koepka? What? Seeing him happy. Okay? Seeing him succeed.
Seeing him beat all the impossible odds of his injury. He's a walking paralyzed person.
You can't put a dollar amount on Brooks putting on the green jacket this year. That, to me, would be the most iconic moment in sports.
It would actually cheapen it if we were making money on that moment. And you know what? This is just par for the course for Hank.
You're addicted to rooting against our friends. You're the opposite of Drake.
Imagine if I never bet the broskies. That's what Hank says every day.
I did bet the broski. No, you bet against the broski.
No, you didn't. Our other br Brovsky.
Our other Brovsky, Max Homa, he's doing pretty well.

He did reach out after the 5,000 to 1 to make the cut joke.

He said that was not nice.

Oh, interesting.

Who said that?

Wait, which one of us said that?

It was a joke.

It was a joke.

And Max said, but I'm the ultimate jokester online, so that's funny. You can take it.
Yeah. Instead of being like, hey, Max, I didn't bet.
Do you ever bet on Max? Yeah, I do. I do, too.
And he's losing it. What? So thanks, Max.
What is he doing? He's losing to Louis Uistel's thousand. You know who I really want to see? What are you doing fucking betting all these pairings? What are you? I'm riding high.
You are. That Baylor one has, you know.
You're in the post... You know what you're in? You're in that post, like, I figured out gambling mode.
Yeah. I mean, I'm taking trips to Philly in the morning coming back and forth.
I got humbled real quick. He's like, hey, I want to go to Detroit the next weekend because I want to gamble some more.
I was like, shut me up real fast. I mean, the Brooks bet...
It was Bubba Watson versus Brooks, and Bubba Watson bogeyed three of the last four holes. Good.
You deserve it. Yeah, that's karma.
That's the universe smiling upon us and taking a leak onto you. You deserve that shit.
I'm also, I'm rooting for the guy, I think he's tied for second right now, or tied for third, as we're recording this. His name is Zlatouris.
Zlatouris?

Like Clitoris.

I would love to spend a weekend hearing Jim Nance say Zlatouris.

Yeah, I think it's Z-L-I.

Like if Zorro performed a female circumcision.

There it is, Zlatouris. If you do have a gambling problem, you should call 1-800-GAMBLER.

There you go.

Thank you, Hank.

You do have a gambling problem because you bet against our friends.

Responsibly, though.

That's a problem.

Betting against our friends is a problem.

But it's not irresponsible.

It's an issue. But I actually bet on him, so I don't really understand where you're coming from.
You bet on him. You only bet on him to have a defense ready when we said, why did you bet against him so you could be like, well, actually, I put $5 on him to win.
Smart, right? Honestly, looking back on it, that XL spreadsheet is one of the stupidest things. It's a good idea.
It was the dumbest thing you've ever done? I spent so much time trying to do it. To squeeze out like $2? It wasn't fun.
We did have a dad sighting at the masters and not the john ram one rory mcelroy hit his dad with an iron shot that was pretty sick pretty funny um all right what else we got oh sean miller got fired from arizona i love college basketball's trend that it's like you either get fired or you get a lifetime contract like bill self uh did you see that Sean Miller, apparently he's going to get an assistant coaching job in the NBA. So that seems like his immediate future, which is hilarious that someone who was sons.
Well, no, it's someone who is under sanctions and, and alleged sanctions and all these things and bad dealings with agents and everything. and then someone owes him a favor in the NBA? Yeah.
He's just quickly becoming... That's what I'm saying.
Yeah, like, huh. That's interesting.
At the same time, that seems like the logical... Because he's not going to get hired anywhere in college basketball right now.
The only place that would hire Sean Miller would be LSU, who currently has their own coach that they're just not going to fire. Right.
Because it's Louisiana and they don't care. And so anywhere else, there's probably going to be a show cause for him where he won't be able to get a job.
So it does make sense he would go to the NBA, rehabilitate himself. Who's the basketball version of Nick Saban, where if you're in trouble, you just go hang out with him for a couple months, and the next thing you know you're hot again? Who would coach coach coach coach the usa team in the summer yeah yeah yeah hang on that staff yeah be on the staff yeah maybe rick patino rick patino will get you under control yeah i think it's going on the usa staff is like the big rehab and you get to you know it's not cheating but coach k just you know getting to be friends with all of the nba all-stars and then like when he goes on recruiting visits being like oh you want me to facetime lebron again not cheating here's my goal i would say that's a gray area a major gray area it's brilliant no i'd say that's brilliant pretty fucked up that he's about our country pretending to to care about our country but really there's some ulterior motives army you know serves the country clearly has a more passion for the country than anyone in this room uh i would do not care about the troops we very much do hank i think that coach k is essentially a war profiteer actually i care so much about the troops i co-hosted zbt today wow yeah so how about that and i said that uh if there was someone who needed to get my covering fire i I'd pick Billy.
Thanks. Yeah, no problem.
I care about the troops so much. I have several wins in Warzone, which you don't have.
Yeah. Because you treat your troop body like there's another one hanging in the closet.
Also, I care about the troops so much that I, at the end of Co-Sing's EBT, I said that I'm thinking about joining the Marines, and then they said that I'm past the age limit. So, unfortunately, I won't be able to, but I would have.
They should do a senior tour. A senior tour.
It's not a bad idea, actually. All right, anything else that we got cooking in the sports world? Kind of a light little dull.
Masters are going to be great this weekend, but we had a billion-day baseball games yesterday, which which were awesome. Shout out to Pablo Sandoval.
Pablo Sandoval, comeback player of the weekend, comeback player of the year. He's hit two dingers now as a designated hitter, and he's fatter than he was ever.
I love it. That should be the new NFT.
People forget. We don't talk enough about the clip where Pablo Sandoval is so so fat that when he swings his belt exploded yes that is in that's maybe the best video clip of all time in any genre that should be an nft yes or bartolo cologne hitting the home run yeah both those that one is the best he was like bartolo was a little he was shorter pablo was just probably 300 pounds right yeah he's a big he's a big big boy also we got an answer to the Shohei Otani uh question that we asked Dan Heron I this is just baseball not having fun but technically when he hits as a pitcher there is no DH that's what the answer is oh so in the AL you you make the choice to have a DH so he technically isn't playing two positions at once, which, again, makes it so not fun.
Like, it should be he's DH and pitcher. Agreed.
So that if he gets pulled from the game, he can stay in as the DH. But wait, what if you have a position player that sucks at hitting on that team? Are you allowed to not have that person hit? No, I don't think so.
That's only for a pitcher? Yeah, which would be the ultimate. like, could you imagine being an MLB player and being like, hey, we're not going to have you hit today? It'd be like Little League when they have, every kid has to play like a half an inning and they're like, all right, go into right field for this half an inning.
Yeah. Yeah.
Also, I unveiled my formula today. It started to hit already.
I'm just going to bet against the Pirates every single day. Yeah, they're bad.
Every day, bet against the Pirates. And I think there was a guy that did it back in 2010, 2011, and it made national news at the time.
I kind of kept that in my back pocket for the next time the Pirates were going to be noteworthily bad. Yeah, I think their over-under was 59.5.
And when you have a position player that pitches in a game in the first four games of the season, that's a good red flag for this season has already been sold out. So I'm just going to bet literally every single game against the Pirates and hope for the best this year.
So far, so good. Alright, let's...
Should we do our interview with Eli Manning? Billy, did you have anything else? How you doing, Billy? Doing well. Doing well.
I'm talking to Mike Miller. That was incredible.
The walk-off hit by the-off that was fucking incredible that you just answered my question without well he forgot that we were recording a podcast i wasn't expecting i wasn't expecting you thought we were just having guy time i love it billy we're just broing out oh Oh, damn. He was saying brace the bait on the Mets.

Yeah, Michael Conforto leaning into a pitch with the old Barry Bonds elbow pads, which if you're too young to remember the end of the Barry Bonds era, he would go up a night at medieval times to the plate with so many fucking shin guards and elbow pads, and people would hit him, and it's like he doesn't even... And you'd take like an hour to take him off and then go walk first.
Awesome. I kind of respect the move that Conforto did.
Now, I would hate it if it was done against my team or any team that I was rooting for at the time, but it was a strike. The pitch was a strike, and he leaned into the strike zone with his elbow pad.
It hit him, and then Keith Hernandez had an aneurysm afterwards, like this is Bush League crap. Get this guy off the Mets.
This guy shouldn't be playing right now. You don't play the game that way.
Major disrespecting the game moment, but it was hilarious. It's the Mets, and the fact that it happened against the Marlins, I think is probably the best team for it to happen to, much like we were saying that Gonzaga, we could slander them all we wanted because there aren't a lot of Gonzaga fans.
Like the Marlins, there aren't too many Marlins fans. Did you see, by the way, speaking of Gonzaga, did you see the story that came out that Baylor found out Gonzaga had bought six bottles of champagne? Which that seems like a weird number, I guess, because they're college kids and there's only so many kids that are over 21.
They got ready for the championship with Champaign before the game and Baylor found out.

It was bulletin board material for the guys.

It's like the Mike McCarthy watermelons.

If I had known that fact, that simple fact, it's a no-brainer that Baylor wins.

Jake, do you have anything to say about the – we haven't seen you in a couple days.

You're back.

Yeah, I'm back.

I'm excited to be here.

How are you feeling without college basketball?

Are you okay?

I'm all right, yeah.

It's bittersweet because we've got so many great memories, but there's no game to look forward to. There are a ton of memories.
There's so many memories. There's 68 memories.
So many memories. Yeah.
By the way, I omitted a few. I think I got to 40.
Whoa. Oh, hell yeah.
Out of 68 plus, you guys each had one. Dave had one.
I can start like. That was part of the list though, Jake.
Picking away. You didn't have to put it on there't have to get yourself to like 70 in some way yeah wow all right okay um you did call the grand canyon one too which we should all acknowledge yes that was yeah you got that one you were right about that um all right oh bryson oh he's plus five see what i'm saying doesn't he look a little fatter? He does, yeah.
It's something about the pluses. When you get the plus next to your name or when a reliever comes in and his ERA is like 14, it just quickly goes from power to fat.
Also, when you see the red outline on the numbers sometimes, it looks like a golden corral price tag. Yeah.
He looks a little chunkier looks a little chunky right now and also when you're sad you look fatter yes and he definitely has like a sulkiness to him right now right and so yeah that's like yeah at least 25 pounds yeah when we're on a live stream and like things are going well for me i look skinny and then when things are going bad it quickly becomes fat yeah exactly like when you lay down on the ground at the end of mario party yeah after getting destroyed by bowser again we should play some more mario yeah i'm down we should do that should we do that mario kart no mario mario party was way more fun let's do a mario party at sometime in the next week let's have a little mario party oh one last thing with baseball uh they have they're checking trevor bow balls. His balls are being examined right now.
He has had 10 plus strikeouts in his two starts. He's the first pitcher to have Major League Baseball step in because they said they're going to do this this year.
And if they notice higher spin rates, they're going to take one of the balls. So they took one of Trevor Bauer's balls today and they're going to, I don't know what they're going to do, x-ray it? That would be incredible if he cheated.
Send it would be incredible forensic analysis yeah it'd be funny because like he was the one that noticed the spin rate increase on the Astros pointed that out made a big deal out of that and then it's like the the weapons that he designed are coming back to bite him in the ass oh I need it I need it that would be a great story um that would be that would be the ultimate the Astros getting saved story Because everyone would talk about that. Alright, let's get to Eli Manning.
It's going to be a great interview. Before we do that, PFT, you got a quick word? Yeah, I want to talk to you guys about MeUndies.
MeUndies believes that comfort is about more than what's touching your skin. It's about feeling comfortable in your skin.
That's why MeUndies sources the softest, most comfortable fabrics imaginable. You can express yourself every day in new limited edition prints because what you wear on the outside should empower you from the inside.
That's their whole thing. You know when you rush home to change it into something more comfortable? That's MeUndies.
That's what you put on. It's like they pull the clouds from the sky and they spin it into undies, socks, bralettes, bralettes, bralettes, bralettes, and loungewear.
You can choose from endless styles in sizes extra small to 4XL. They're sustainably soft micromodal and their new ultralight breathe fabrics are so comfy and breathable that you can move free or not.
It's up to you. MeUndies has a great offer for our listeners.
For any first time purchasers, get 15% off and free shipping. They also have a problem-free philosophy.
If you're not satisfied with any product for any reason, they're going to refund it or they're going to exchange it. No caveats, no questions.
To get your 15% off your first order and free shipping, go to MeUndies.com. That's MeUndies.com.
The interview with Eli Manning is also going to be brought to you by Icon Pass. Icon Pass has a brand new season unlocked.
The promise of adventures ahead and endless stoke on the horizon. It's a ski pass.
It's a snowboarding pass. Now on sale, you can own it all with Icon Pass.
You can own the season, own the stories, own the stoke with pass pass options starting at only $399 adult and exclusive spring savings,

there's an adventure for every type of rider, both new to the mountain and longtime shredder.

Lock in the 21-22 season with up to $200 savings on child passes,

up to $100 in renewal discounts,

and a new payment plan from as low as $0 down and 0% APR, unlocking access to more than 40 unique Icon Pass destinations. From the second you score your pass and stake your claim to the 21-22 season, you've got an entire season of sweet stuff to look forward to.
Explore pass options at IconPass.com. That's I-K-O-N Pass.com.
Now com now here he is eli manning okay we now welcome on a very very special guest it is future hall of famer eli manning he is uh he and his brother payton i don't know if you heard of him launching an exclusive nft artwork entitled the manning legacy collection it's coming out friday april 16th the whole collection is going to be out that day some of the stuff goes uh supporting children's hospital there's going to be the helmet catch there's going to be all kinds of cool stuff nfts are the rage so this is going to be exciting uh eli we are very pumped to have you on did i do anything wrong by saying future Hall of Famer there? Are you a Hall of Famer? Start with a hard question. Yeah, start with that.
It's not up to me. If you want to say it, you're welcome to.
It's not something in the script. I say, hey, when you introduce me, you have to say this or anything of that sort.
So, you know, it's one of those deals, you know, I kind of enjoy and laugh about the conversations about it and the fact that it is kind of create, you know, been such an issue and not just now, I feel like it's been talked about for the last five years, but it's not something that I lose sleep about. And, and if, you know, if it happens one day, it would be a great honor.
If you were to vote on yourself for the Hall of Fame, would you vote you in? You know, maybe. I don't know.
It depends how I was feeling that day, I guess. I don't know.
I think it's all just the great players and, you know, sometimes to think of yourself belonging with some, you know, such, you know, legends and icons, you know, I'm, I'm not that, um, conceited and not that confident in myself to say that I belong with those people. Um, and so, but, uh, if, if, if they invite me to, uh, join them and to be amongst them, uh, I would gladly take a seat and it would be, as I said, it'd be a great honor.
So some of this NFT stuff, you guys have, uh, paying homage to the Manning family, the first, first family of football and Cooper. So does Cooper have it the best? Because, you know, Peyton's a hall of Famer.
You're going to be in the Hall of Fame. But Cooper basically has the entire career of, oh, well, he was actually the best Manning, but, you know, injuries derailed his career.
Does he get that? Like, you guys aren't serious when you say Cooper was the best, you know, at football, right? Like, you're just being nice to him. Well, you know, he was a receiver that ran a 4-7 I mean I assume he was going to be the best NFL player of all time right I mean it's a no-brainer and there's a lot of 4-7 receivers out there that you know that are in the Hall of Fame um and so you know with Coop um you know he's he's been the best brother, and he handled it so well.

I think a lot of people might have had a hard time kind of understanding, hey, you get injuries, something you're really just born with. It wasn't an injury that happened in football, and that your career gets shortened, and you watch your two brothers go on to have success and play this game.
But, you know, he's enjoyed coming to every game. You know, I've never got him a sideline pass in my life yet.
I've seen him on the sideline of 45 of my games before. So he's a guy that kind of figures things out.
He's wheeling and dealing. He enjoys watching us.
He cheers for us. He lives, you know, used to live every Sunday right there with us.
And so he's had a good run just being a fan of football and following Peyton Knight's career. One thing that I do think that you're head and shoulders the best at in your family when it comes to playing quarterback is you take a very elegant sack.
I know that you've practiced. There's an art to how sometimes you'll take a sack before the guy is able to hit you and it's actually it's really smart I've talked with some like running backs about this there's an art to falling down so that you don't get hurt you are the king of knowing when to self-sack yourself so you don't get hit is that something that you practiced like you did stop dropping roll drills or it was there just like an alarm clock that would go off in your head? Because sometimes you would notice if there was a guy coming directly from behind you, and there's no chance you'd be able to see him, but you could like feel his presence.
Well, I think as you play, you kind of start to learn a presence. And, you know, there's times when you can escape and times when you try to escape.
And I think it's a little bit as you, you know, as you get older, as some of those, you know, fast twitch movements start to leave you, you realize that, you know, there's probably a better chance of something worse happening. Me trying to, you know, do some, some move to get out of here and spin and, and avoid this.
And sometimes you just got to say, Hey, I'm in, I'm in a bad, I'm in a bad spot right here. And let's kind of avoid a worse play and go down.
You know, you don't want to ever – it's not giving up. It's not, you know, quitting.
It's just, you know, a combination of, like you said, avoiding a huge hit. You know, there's a time where you can kind of, you know, go with the hit a little bit or be able to throw it and kind of turn your back to a hit.
You don't take it right, you know, hit right to the face. So, you know, you see, you know, a lot of quarterbacks, it is important to be out there and to be out there, you know, for the whole game and to be out there for the next week.
And so if you take every single big hit that's coming your way, it's gonna be tough to do that. And so it is a little bit about kind of a learning curve of how to take hits, how to stay healthy.

So the other signature thing from your career, besides the two Super Bowls, which we should note that, in the longevity, which it's still incredible whenever a quarterback plays for any type of streak in terms of starts because it's such a difficult position and and you get hit so many times was uh your face the manning face do you do you did you know like when the manning face would get captured were you like oh crap I had my mouth open there and I was staring off into space the camera probably got that one do you because I know you probably didn't pay a lot of attention to social media, but it is a phenomenon and it is something I dearly, dearly miss from both you and your brother after you retired. No, I didn't, I never noticed it.
And I think, you know, obviously social media wasn't always around and there weren't always these memes and there weren't these pictures of it. So like, you know, you had, I had a good, you know, 10 years of playing football, whether it was college or my first years in NFL, where, like, you know, that stuff really wasn't out there.
It wasn't caught. So I'd already kind of got into my habits of kind of standing there watching the game or reflecting on a play.
And, you know, you're not thinking about the face that you're making, whether your mouth's open or you're just kind of wandering off for a little bit. Like, it was never a concern.
You know, I think once it kind of came out and you see it, you're like, well, it is what it is. You know, I got too many things to worry about during a game.
I can't worry about my, you know, face that I'm making at every moment when a camera could be on me. Yeah.
And it usually catches you when something good is not happening. When something bad is happening, that's usually when it's like, all right, let's pan, you know, see what Eli's face he's making here.
Kind of the just mouth open, just, you know, no emotion face going on right now. Yes.
You know it. You know it.
If you had taken my phone in the year 2014 or 15 and looked at the pictures,

you would think i was your stalker because you're like why is why are there so many pictures of my face in in your phone yes i mean that could be a great collection yeah you know oh we should nft it we should nft, wait, give us one real quick. Give us one.

Give us your best interpretation.

There it is. It's perfect.
Yeah, we should NFT it. Are you frozen? Oh, no, he's fine.
Actually, you know what? I guarantee you every football writer would vote for you to get into the Hall of Fame if that was your bust. We would all love to see it.
And it's funny because, like, obviously if you were to take a picture of me at any given moment of any given day the face that i'm just casually making probably looks a million times stupider uh but it just you know it happened to be you on the sidelines i think the cameras actually like they told the producers would tell the camera guys like instead of trying to find an attractive woman in the stands to zoom in on just like keep this camera this is gonna be the eli camera for the afternoon uh but yeah it was a it was a fun part of the eli camera and they're just you know there's one camera on me and they're like all right we got he's making it zoom in go go camera two on it live in a weird way too it's it's like i know it's not a compliment but it should be a compliment because you and your brother and like the manning family were such an integral part of like every Sunday you know what I mean it just felt like the presence

was there in the league and uh it definitely has felt weird without you guys there do you

when when is uh Arch can we get him in the league like can we fast track this your nephew can we get

him in the league tomorrow I you know what my my parents have kind of said the same thing it was a

a weird year for them last year.

You know,

not having a,

Thank you. tomorrow? You know what? My parents have kind of said the same thing.
It was a weird year for them last year. You know, not having a Sunday of, you know, watching one of their kids play football had been going on for over 20 years where that was kind of their routine.
I think they've enjoyed it a little bit. It's not, you know, it's not just a Sunday.
It's kind of the losses or the weeks leading up on the report after a loss or what's in the media on a Monday, Tuesday after a game. I don't think they missed that part of it.
But, you know, it was weird kind of when Peyton retired for me, not getting to watch his games because I've been doing that since he was in high school. I pretty much would watch every game in high school, college, in the NFL to not have him around.
But, you know, I definitely, I do have my nephew, like you said, have arts to watch. I can stream his games from high school football, which is crazy.
That's a thing now. So, but streaming his and, you know, it's going to be fun getting to watch his career and for him to kind of go through the life cycle of playing quarterback, whether it's high school, college, and we'll see what happens after that.
Yeah, you guys have done a pretty good job. I've read a few things about him where you're trying to keep him kind of insulated and away from him because there is a lot of attention, obviously, on him given the family that he comes from and and the position that he plays but big cat and i are kind of recruiting coordinators for jackson state university our co-worker deon sanders is the head coach there um would just going off what you know do you think he would be open to taking a visit to jackson state university not far from new orleans you know it's only about two two and a half hours away.
It's an easy drive. I think Deion is a heck of a recruiter and it's a great program.
There's actually a great history of a lot of guys at Jackson State going on to play in the NFL. A couple of Hall of Famers in there as know, I think there's a possibility.

I'll put in a good word for you.

Okay, so that means we've officially checked off our first box

where we made contact with the family.

Yep.

Okay, perfect.

More Eli Manning in a second, but a quick word from our friends at Black Buffalo.

If you dip tobacco, you can stop right now and switch to Black Buffalo.

What is Black Buffalo?

Black Buffalo is a dip literally made from edible green leaves and food grade ingredients with the same flavors and texture as traditional tobacco products. So it spits just like real dip, but you don't have to have tobacco in it.
It has nicotine in it. It has pouches.
I swear by Black Buffalo. If you're someone who dips and you're trying to quit, Black Buffalo is a great dip alternative out there.
Black Buffalo sells products on their website at blackbuffalo.com and is available in both long cut and pouches as well as nicotine-free versions called Zero. So great alternative to dip.
You got to check it out. I swear by it.
I've been using it for a couple years now. I love Black Buffalo.
Use code PMT for checkout for 20% off your first order on blackbuffalo.com. Like I said, they got mint.
They got wintergreen. They got straight.
They got peach. They got all your favorite flavors.
They got pouches. They got long cut.
And it spits just like the real thing, but it doesn't have tobacco. So go check them out right now.
BlackBuffalo.com. Use code PMT at checkout for 20% off.
Warning, this product contains nicotine. Nicotine is an addictive chemical.
Go again to BlackBuffalo.com and then use that promo code PMT or go to BlackBuffalo.com slash discount slash PMT for 20% off your first order on blackbuffalo.com. Ditch that tobacco.
Get with Black Buffalo. Go check them out right now.
Blackbuffalo.com. Use code PMT at checkout for 20% off.
Okay. Back to Eli Manning.
So you have Eli's Place is coming out. It's the college version of Peyton Place.
That is awesome, one. You have a way better, like going to college towns is so much fun.
What's your favorite one, not in the SEC? So outside the SEC, which you know very well, what's your favorite college town to visit? I haven't visited that many college towns outside the SEC, to be honest with you. You know, I'd love to, you know, I have not been to any, you know, college games really besides, you know, when a recruiting visit to Texas when I was in high school and saw a game, which is a pretty cool experience.
But I'd love to, you know, I'd love to go to Michigan or Ohio State or Notre Dame or go to Oklahoma or, you know, go see Oregon to play. So, you know, there's kind of a list of places I'd love to go.
Obviously, you know, the pandemic kind of threw that into a wrench last year, my first year of retirement. But, you know, I love the history of college football.
I love the fans and the students and just some of the cheers that go on.

And so I'm excited about this new project, getting to see some of these college towns

and some of the great history that's been made there.

Yeah.

Our producer, Hank, is a diehard Patriots fan.

And I was just wondering if you could apologize to him for one of the two Super Bowls, which one would you like to apologize for? I would apologize. I probably apologize for the first one, the one in 07, just because I know, you know, I know it would be nice if they, you know, went undefeated, went 19-0.
Yeah, it would have been nice. That would have probably been nice.
They would have gone down as the greatest team of all time in the history of football. No questions out.
It was the all-time greatest team ever to ever play the game of football, maybe in any sport, but now they're not. that's a good apology that wasn't an apology so i want to get back to nfts real quick so the nft artwork entitled the manning legacy collection if you could nft so if you could nft one moment from your career that you aren't currently going to sell on april 16th what would it be maybe an underrated like hey people don't talk about this moment but i'd to NFT it.
I mean, I think we already answered that. I think it's just kind of me staring at things.
I think you can go through a great, you know, so many options. It's like what I could be staring at or what I could be thinking in those moments.
So I think we've created, you know, I think we're we're excited about that yeah i do think that that's the way to like honestly i i own one nft right now i would spend um probably five to ten thousand dollars just on nfts of your face and i'm just like a casual guy that's very like new to the market that you're going to reach a whole new audience with the manning face nfts that's the nicest thing you've ever said about me thank you yeah so what made you get into the nft market like what was this just a totally new hey everyone's doing it but i didn't expect the mannings to do it and it's kind of cool thing i think what really got us interested you know especially me is that you know you just retire and you're trying to reflect on your career and and you know be able to create something that is so personal that is so uh unique and to get an artist to kind of create a piece of art um that kind of tells your story your football story and to do it with Peyton do it with your dad to do some uh of you in college NFL, and to kind of, you know, use symbols and images and words to kind of, you know, tell that story of your football career. And I thought with this new space and do it through the NFT where people can use it, they can trade it, they can, you know, have that likeness to it and own, have that ownership of this digital item.
And so I think it's kind of getting with the new times and getting in these alternative assets. And it was just kind of a natural fit.
They're really excited about it. So I had one last question.
I know PFT has one after me. But so there is an NFT of Peyton's Omaha.

Did he steal that from you?

So Omaha, it's kind of funny. It has a long history of everything going on there.

So, I mean, originally, you know, the Patriots,

Tom Brady was using it back in probably 05 and 06.

And their quarterback coach, John Huffnagle, came from the Patriots to the Giants. Well, that was probably before that.
He came to the Giants in 04, and he had it kind of in our playbook in 2004. So, you know, Patriots were probably using that in 01, 02 at least.
And so we started using it, you know, and then, you know, Peyton kind of made it famous just because, you know,

just on the, they turned up the mics a little bit louder, I think,

in some of these games and, and,

and they caught him saying it in a playoff game where he said it like 58

times in a game. And, you know, you could not help,

but just like wondering why is he saying Omaha this many times? I've never heard anyone say that word. It's not really a football word, you would think.
That's crazy. So he stole it from you.
So you should get all the – he owes you money from the commercials and everything. Yeah, I mean, you would think I'd get like a steak maybe.
You know, he's got like Omaha steaks. He's got a key to the city in Omaha.
You might, you know, you'd he'd send me a couple of steaks. You would think.
Yeah. That's what you should have done that.
Like your word should have been Rolex. And if you just say Rolex enough, you just get a sponsorship.
Now you're thinking you're giving some, some young quarterbacks some ideas. What words can we use? Listen, that's the kind of outside the box thinking we provide at Jackson state university.
If you know any young quarterbacks that want to maximize their value in the future, you just send them our way. We'll take great care of them.
Yes. Thank you, sir.
I think I know a guy. Our intern is not the smartest.
He just texted us in the middle of this interview. He said, is Omaha to stop the Blitz? D-Day reference? Omaha Beach? That's not it, is it? That is not it.
Okay, good. That is not it.
All right, that was Billy Football's question. My last question is just do you consider Peyton to be a ring chaser? Ooh.
A ring chaser? Yeah. Meaning what? Meaning like he had to go join a super team to win his second Super Bowl, and you stuck around with the Giants your whole career.
You made it happen happen yourself no i i don't consider payton a ring chaser i think payton wanted to stay in indianapolis uh you know he had a obviously four neck surgeries and um you know that that kind of prevented him that you know indianapolis went and drafted andrew luck and and released payton so uh you know after that you know he you know, he was a free agent. I don't know if Denver was – it's not like he, you know, went there and brought a bunch of people in to join his team or if they were really considered a Super Bowl favorite at that time.
And so, you know, so I think he went in there and kind of changed the culture a little bit and made them a contender every year, you know, to win the Super Bowl. So I think I'd say he's far from a ring chaser.
Yeah. Well, Eli, thanks so much.
We appreciate it. We know you got to run.
And just so you know, every time the Cowboys and the Giants play on Sunday Night Football, we are just fully expecting you to come out of the tunnel because I feel like we watched that game seven billion times in the course of our lives. I feel like it was on a lot.
Every opening game, first game of the season, that was kind of an automatic I felt like for a long time. Yes, yes.
But thank you. We appreciate it.
And anytime you want to come back on, we'd love to have you. All right.
Appreciate it, fellas. That was fun.
We got FireFest of the Week coming up. FireFest is brought to you by 3Chi, our great friends at 3Chi.
They are the industry leader in Delta 8 THC products. All their products are formulated by a biochemist.
They're made right here in the USA with USA-grown hemp. 3Chi's Delta 8 is a federally legal version of THC.
It's a much more functional alternative to marijuana. It gives you an amazing buzz.
You get a great body feel. You get a clear head.
You get less anxiety and paranoia. It's available online at 3CHI.
That's the number 3CHI.com. And that retailer is around the country.
You have to be 21 to purchase. Remember, it's not CBD.
It's psychoactive. It's going to give you a buzz, so please use it responsibly.
Again, go to 3chi.com. That's the number 3-C-H-I.com.
Shop for Delta 8 vapes, gummies, tinctures, and oils. You can make your own homemade edibles out of them.
Use promo code PARDON at checkout. Get 5% off your order.
Promo code PARDON at checkout. Get 5% off your order at 3G.
Okay, Firefresh of the week. Henry.
I got a few. Okay.
Unload on us, Hank. Tough week.
I got vaccinated today. My arm hurts, and I just feel like I lost my soul.
You know what hurts, Hank? I didn't post about it yet. You know what hurts, Hank? What? My chest because I had COVID.
Okay. So get vaccinated, bro.

Are you just rubbing that in Big Cat's face?

You're not going to get COVID?

You think you're better than him?

No.

Actually, my chest feels fine.

My other COVID.

I mean, my other.

See, it's already affecting me.

Your other COVID?

Yeah.

My other fire fest is that my girlfriend's on vacation without me.

Oh, where?

Not somewhere nice.

Ruba.

Oh, fellas.

Verbal meme.

This will be good for youtube when when someone's on vacation i'm not damn is that the fist yeah it's okay with the vein see if i got my vein on did okay i got you now did her other boyfriend take her yeah that's that's what i'm curious about on the gal's Mm-hmm. Yeah, it is.
You're not nervous? No. What's her best gal friend's name who's out there? Charles? Francesca.
Francesca. Frank? Yeah.
Frances? Brianna? Oh. Brian? You talking about Ms.
Chicken Fry? Yep. Okay.
That sounds like... Single mingle.
Maybe getting a little wild. I mean, you guys are assholes, but sure.

Can we go on vacation as a podcast?

Great question, Billy.

Great question.

Billy, your life is a vacation.

Big Cat earlier said he likes vacations,

and I almost fell out of my chair.

Billy, your life is a vacation.

Like, your life is a vacation.

I know.

Verbal meme. this is Hank this

weekend while Ree's out of town, and it's a picture of

Stan Marsh covered in jizz. Oh.

Yeah.

There's gonna be a lot of pent-up Normie, huh?

Yeah. He's gonna be looking poor.

Maybe toss on some

brazzers for him.

I know, it was rough and rowdy. That was what got him going

last time. The ring girls? I don't know.

Bobby Lang was right before the violence. The title fight.
Wait, Billy? Did your dog get a boner to Billy? No, this was probably the original picture. Billy would be so honored.
He needs Roman swipes. He would be so honored to know that he was giving animals erections again.
He'd be like, still got it. Yep.
That frog thing was way in the past. Is that it, Hank? Yeah, that's it.
All right. Well, there's one other one.
Yeah, do it. I don't know.
I might cut this just because I don't want it to somehow get back to me. I'm sure you've thought about talking about dog park drama, Big Cat, before, but I just don't want it to somehow get back to this person and have her.
No, dog park drama is great. It's not even drama.
Well, there's drama where it's like there's a group of people that are always having drinks, and I show and they never say anything to me. I stand on the side.
You've got to be the one to initiate. I don't want to do that.
That's too awkward for me. Listen.
Okay. That's not the drama.
Hold on. Before you get to the drama.
That's not even the drama. That's not the drama.
I used to take Stella to a dog park where it was literally like everyone was best friends with each other. And you just have to make a decision within the first three or four trips.
Am I going to be a dog park person or not? And I think I'm not going to shame, but I'm very comfortable just watching my dog play and then leaving and not having to talk to him. Same.
They just dish out drinks sometimes. I'm like, PR 101.
Yeah. Bring a blunt.
No, you need to bring your own drink.

Step it up.

It always felt a little weird.

Like, I just want to get my dog some exercise, and then I'm going to go hang out with my friends.

I know, but it's kind of like when someone's buying shots.

Yeah, I'll do a shot. I don't think about it, but then when a lady's walking around with giving out people seltzers, I'm like, I kind of want one.
I think they think that you're a cop. I think that's what your problem is.
Yeah, definitely give off cop vibes. What you need to do, Hank, you need to have Normie run nearby them and then just call Normie by his name really loudly so they learn your dog's name.
That's actually the best way to meet those people because then they start calling your – they learn your dog before they learn you. Oh, it's Normie's dad.
Oh, look, Normie's here today. Normie's dad.
And then you're like, yeah, he misses you guys. And then boom, conversation starter.
You got any more of that Hennessy? And then boom, you're in. No, I'm with you though, Hank.
I don't, I think you should bring your own drinks because the minute you become like a true dog park person, I think it just becomes your whole life. Just a lot of talk.
I think you then have to hang out with them outside of the dog

park, which is like, ooh. Absolutely not.

So that's the thing. I don't think that there is a

hangout. The second somebody

offers, the second somebody in

the dog park group is like, we should hang out in real

life. At that point, it becomes

a little too real for everyone else. No, but there's

definitely some dog park people that were

like, they're down. They're CrossFit.

They got dogs to make friends. Alright, so what happened? There's just a dog park people that were like, they're down.
They're CrossFit. They got dogs to make friends.
All right, so what happened? There's just a dog there named Grandpa. That's a cute name.
And? That's the drama? It's not drama. That's what I'm saying.
It's not drama. I haven't gotten it off my mind.
Grandpa, what kind of dog? This is very important. I'm not going to say that.
No, tell us the weight. I actually don't even know.
The weight. Smaller dog.
Okay, I was going to say, Grandpa has to be a big dog.

Yeah.

How small?

Pretty similar to Norman.

Oh, that's bad.

So it's like a chihuahua rat tier size.

I don't like it either.

I think Grandpa works if you have like a 120-pound dog that's like,

just like, oh, here comes Grandpa.

Kind of that.

But a little like runt dog just like running around people calling it grandpa? Nah. So you're just thinking about grandpa all day? Yeah.
Can't get grandpa out of your mind? What do you think is an old dog? I don't know. I mean, this is actually, here's how you get in with these people.
I don't want to. I thought you said that you wanted shots.
Well, I said it's like FOMO.

I get quick bouts of FOMO, but it dissolves quickly when I realize I don't have to have a small talk with these people.

You just want one shot.

You want to be offered a shot.

Yeah.

Okay, easy way to do that is just because I guarantee there's a big overlap between the people who do post on social media about getting their vaccines.

Unlike us, Hank, we don't mention that publicly.

I'm honestly nervous about this entire

conversation because I feel like I'm not

going to be able to go to the dog park. You think there's listeners?

If you wear a giant sticker that says,

look what I got today, then they'll be like,

oh, congratulations, and then they'll give

you a shot. Hold on.
Time out.

How old is the person who owns

Grandpa? Youngish. Like, I'm probably

going to... Bro? No.

But there are bros there. I've met people there that i go but there's trust your instincts they'll be like yo dude i've been thinking about that about grandpa for a while and you might get a drink now to have people recognize you there yes so then you're good yeah i think grandpa's a great name it's a it's a beautiful no no no no you gotta sewer the name grandpa to the other people that's the conversation They'll be like, yeah, it's a great name.
It's a beautiful dog. No, no, no, no, no.
You've got to sewer the name Grandpa to the other people.

That's the conversation.

They'll be like, yeah, it's a little ridiculous, isn't it?

What if she's the ringleader and turns them all against me?

You should say, you know, you should be like.

You've got to take that chance.

I don't want to take that chance.

I think Grandpa's a great name.

She'll be like, where's Grandma?

I thought it was.

Nah, I'm not going to.

It's a great name.

Say it, say it.

No, it's a great name. Say it.
It's a great name. I think it's a great name.
It's a beautiful dog. This is good.
Love the dog park. This is good stuff.
Dog parks are funny. They're very weird.
Yeah, it's interesting. There's a whole community.
It's an interesting place. Yeah, you got to keep your knees loose.
That's the big tip in a dog park. Yeah, you'll get taken out from behind.
Always got to keep your knees a little bit bent. Or lean against the fence if you can.
No, seriously. You get smoked by a good golden retriever in the back of the knees.
You blow your ACL out. There was one point where I took Leroy to a dog park, and he picked up a tennis ball that was on the ground and brought it over to me because he was a good boy.
And the person who owned that tennis ball came over and got mad at me because he punctured it with his teeth. I was like, well, you brought a dog.
It's a dog. You brought a tennis ball to a dog park, and my dog saw your ball.
Yes. And now you're mad because you can't play tennis with this ball anymore that you brought to the dog park.
That's also, there's always a bulldog at the dog park that gets the tennis ball and never gives it up, and it's always so funny. It is the best.
They just destroy it. They lay down.
Yeah, and the owner's like, I'm so sorry. It's like, dude, it's okay.
You got a bulldog. Yeah.
Like, they will never give up balls. Hey, just bring beers.
Just roll in with, like, a 12-pack of Coors Light. Yeah, but it's just a small.
I'm not a small talker. I'm not built for that life.
Are you a long talker? No, I'm just a... Not a talker? Yeah.
Well, I'll talk, but it's small talk. Like,ations that are going nowhere when it starts, and it ends up going nowhere, and

you just wasted 20 minutes talking about nothing.

And then, like, oh, where do you work?

I'm like, oh, I would do audio engineering.

That's what you say?

I try.

Yeah, I don't want to.

I don't want to.

I do video production.

Yeah.

You should be like, I'm the grand poobah of a Jenga league.

Well, like. Play Bar Slap.
Download it right grand poobah of a Jenga league. Well, like...

Play Barstool app, download it right now.

Yeah, Spittin' Chicklets contest closes tomorrow.

I just don't...

Because once the Barstool conversation, part of my take is it opens a new can of worm.

But if you say like, oh, I work for a podcast, you're like, okay, fucking weirdo.

Yeah, no, that does...

It never works.

It's like, oh, what podcast, man?

I just say sports media. I say video production usually.
Yeah. Hopefully they don't inquire more.
Yeah. I still say I'm a blogger because that's a great way to just end the conversation immediately.
Yeah. No one wants to ask a follow-up question about that.
That's true. They're like, oh, sorry.
Yeah. Oh, sorry.
Your wife has taken a bad turn. They're like, sorry I asked.
Alright, PFT, you're at Fyre Fest?

My Fyre Fest of the week is that I've been unfairly labeled as the horny guy.

Oh yeah, so unfair.

It is, I'm being slut shamed.

And I'm not that horny.

I can't even... I don't know if it's slut shamed.

I can't even innocently respond to a Jim Seltzer tweet.

Heaven forbid.

Slut shamed. Heaven forbid that happens.
And Billy went out and bought a bonk stick. Oh, nice.
To bonk me. I'm not horny.
I'm not horny. I'm not horny.
And you know what? We were talking about this before the show. You're not horny? Billy's not on steroids? Yeah.
I love the name Grandpa. Guys, I swear.
I'm not horny. I'm not horny right now.
I'm not even thinking about sex at all. But I I'm kind of thinking about sex but I'm also saying that like we took our eye off the ball as a society everyone's concerned with being the horny police we we stopped caring about people capping online no one's accusing people of being capped anymore and the only people are capping about not being thank god you're 28 because if you were, that would be the lamest sentence ever.
No, I'm just saying, like,

everyone, we as an internet

used to be great about being like, yo, that dude's

capping right now. And then

people just forgot about it, and now we're all concerned

with, oh, this guy's horny. This guy's like,

you just discovered what capping actually means.

This guy possibly has

a semi-erection right now. Let's bonk him

to death. Cap.
And so it's everything...

This guy's replying to Halle Berry's swimsuit

pictures, but he's not horny. It's everything that

I tweet is now, like, people Thank you. has a semi-erection right now.
Let's bonk him to death. Cap.
And so is everything... This guy's replying to Halle Berry's swimsuit pictures,

but he's not horny.

It's everything that I tweet is now...

Like, people are capping about me being horny

because it's like, yo, PFT is...

I don't know how you could make it worse, but you did.

Because we're all going to be talking about capping now.

Capping's back.

Yeah.

I don't know if this is going to work.

I know what you're trying to do.

That's Cap right now.

You're trying to switch Cap with horny. No, Cap.
Everyone's..., Cap. I saw a bunch of people today start to talk about Cap again.
And I was like, yeah, that's a good point. Let's talk about Cap.
Colin? No, I'm not. No, that's Cap.
You're Cap right now. You're Cinnamon Toast Cap.
We should start. We should take that conversation back in the world.
I can't believe it's not Cap. What team would want Colin Kaepernick as a starter? He should do another tryout.
He should do another tryout. Yeah.
Actually, the perfect time was for the Bears. I can't believe Andy Dalton has a job but not Kaep.
Then we'd all be talking about it. And no one would be talking about my dick anymore.
Yeah. It's not your dick.
It's you. It's you.
It's your brain. You're running amok with the horny accusations.
Because there's a quote to Halle Berry. I have not made any accusations.
I have just said the word bonk. And she said, tell me something I don't know.
And so I wanted to talk to Halle Berry. Wasn't the tweet from like a month ago too? No, it was like a few days ago when you just found it.
I didn't even know that she was wearing it. Three days later.
Alright, my fire fest. Well, it's not a fire.
Well, it is a fire fest because I don't know how to say it. So I'm just going to say it.
You get to get the fucking thing ready. I'm having another child.
Bonk. So the Fyre Fest part is that I having a second kid is like it's not a big announcement.
First was obviously a big announcement. That's a life change.
Having a second is like, hey, we're just keep moving. This is pretty sick.
Let's have another one. Yeah, right.
A sequel.

So I forgot to like I told I told all the guys here a few months ago. I forgot to tell basically anyone besides like my close friends and like some people in the office.

So now I have to tell everyone.

So that's all sympathy weight that you have right now.

Yeah, that's sympathy weight.

Yeah.

Can you believe that I've I've been doing all this and I have another kid coming? Damn, what a hero. I'm actually not a hero.
Can I make a name suggestion? LeBron. Yeah, so you don't know the sex.
Grandpa. Should we do a sex reveal? It's going to be a girl.
So that's the other firefest. I am going to, as of June, so it's June 15th to due date.
as of June I'm going to be forced to do a podcast with a bunch of misogynists

and I'm no longer going to be a misogynist. So I'm going to have to figure that out.
The easy way, just toss in your bio. Yeah.
And I'm going to be like, oh, shit. For some reason, I just love watching women's sports now.
That just happened overnight. So big cat.
The transformation. Dude, the transformation, even though I already loved watching it.
Are you going to let your daughter read BarstoolSports.com? Yes. Well, I don't think it'll be around by the time she can read.
Yeah. Whoa.
Well, actually, no. I was thinking more like the time that she can conceptualize it, like 15.
I wasn't saying, like, actually read, like, five years from now. Yeah, no, no, no.
I was saying more like 15. Yeah, yeah.
Do you know something that we don't know? No, I was thinking more like 15, 16. Yes, of course.
She will be a huge Nate Dogg fan. And Greeny.
Jerry Thornton. Yeah, Jerry Thornton and White Sox Nate.
You might not be around. No, but seriously, it is awesome.
You shut up, Hank. I will say this.
It's funny because I don't really talk about my child and my upcoming child much, but I do think there's a lot of dads and moms that listen to this show because when I dropped the Bluey thing with who did we interview, and I talked about Bluey with them. Waka.
Waka. I had so many tweets about Bluey.
So I think there's a big, strong contingent of parents that listen to this show. So, yeah, I'm excited.
Being a dad is, like, the coolest thing ever. I'm just going to say that.
Not to be sappy. But I fucking, like, me and my son, like, we bro out hard all the time.
Like, vibes to the moon, Billy. Think about your coolest friend and just being able to live with them.
And then you get to hang out with them. And you're just chilling.
That's my dog. Yeah, right.
Your dog and my son, the same thing. Don't make a big deal of it, but that's the big announcement.
Billy. There was an image circulating the internet.
Of your long-ass nose. My large appendage.
Your nose. It was a bad.
Very pointy. I never realized how pointy your nose was.
No, it was the angle. So basically, I got FaceTime.
You got Chloe'd? By a bunch of coworkers at Barstool. And I was like, oh, man, they're including me in these group FaceTimes? I don't spend much time around the office i was like wow like i'm in the club so i hit accept and uh i realized i was holding my phone way too close to my face and i do have a larger nose but the angle of the camera yeah it's pretty just it was the deviated septum yeah it's you know where that come from? I was born with a larger nose, and then years of contact sports, helmets coming down, hitting the bridge.
Oh, so you're making this about being a jock? Yeah, I mean, you know, you get some scar tissue on top of the large nose, and it looks pretty big. You would not be invited to Dustin Johnson's after party when he wins the Masters with a nose like that.
Vacuum it all up, bro. Just Hoover and Schneesh.

No.

Go like that for me.

Gator tails aren't good for gains.

Go like this.

Oh.

How'd you learn that phrase, Billy?

It's also whale tails.

I have no idea.

Yeah, right.

Are you talking about eating ass?

No.

Talking about what Billy's talking about.

Bonk and Billy.

There we go.

That's Cap. We're talking about Coke, and you all of a sudden are talking about eating ass? No.
Talking about what Billy's talking about. Bonk and Billy.
There we go. That's Cap.
We're talking about Coke and you all of a sudden are talking about eating ass. Crazy.
Jesus Christ. Some great memes, though, if you haven't seen the pictures.
Yeah. Although, I guess the funniest joke was from Sopranos, which I didn't know because I fucking stopped watching it.
What's the joke? But someone said Billy could smoke a cigarette in the rain and be just fine. Yes.
The Nigel Thornberry references were funny, I will admit. You got a beak.
It's not a nose. It's a beak.
It's a beak. It was just bad of a...
I've seen pictures of them where they look fatter than they are. Well, the Doug's picture was just short.
But it was such a bad angle. Yeah.
It was one of the worst angles I've ever seen. Yeah.
It made the nose look not only like, you know, big already, but long. Like a Dorito.
Yeah, like pointy. You know how we always joke about how you're always late to places? We should specify that your nose is always on time because it gets here like five minutes early.
My nose is early. All right, Jake.
You have a fire fest? Yeah, so I've been at home this week, and I noticed... Why? Bonk.
No, it has nothing to do with that. You've been jerking off? Yeah.
Okay. And I noticed that one of the signs on my wall is missing a thumbtack, and I'm scared I'm going to step on it.
Oh! What a predicament.

That could have been for a while and it got vacuumed up.

That is actually a good fire fest.

Because it's like the mental anguish is worse than actually stepping on it.

But it could have been for four months and I'm safe and it's vacuumed up.

Or it could have been two days ago and I can't find it.

Do you have any pictures like when you did a FaceTime with us or when you Skyped in or Zoomed in?

I can go home and tweet it.

Why don't you just... I mean...
Well, no, your place is too big to find it. Is that your only FireFest? Did you ask your maid if she could find it? I don't have a maid.
Oh, shit. Sorry, you're live-in nanny.
Nope. I live with me, myself, and I.
Is that your only Fireyre Fest? I have a few others, but I think they make the air. What are the others? I don't know.
What does Hank want to talk about? A video? A certain video series? It sounds like you want to talk about it. Oh, I was going to bring it up.
Oh, yeah. No, it is actually interesting.
No, it is a Fyre Fest. Jake Marsh, who went to Syracuse, Medill, and ever heard of it, he doesn't know how to say the word mortgage.
Oh, yeah. Yeah.
He doesn't know how to say the word mortgage. He pronounces it Mort-gidge.
Not if you listen to Thursday Night's Championship show. Say it.
Give it a shot right now. Mortgage.
Oh. The problem is that there's a YouTube video that has you saying multiple times also it was all the same time i said it once no they replay it oh that that that changed that makes it literally it was one recording yeah all right that makes better we thought you were just saying it wrong the entire time no i said it once wait a second Wait a second.
Hank, are you playing dumb? Did you hear the mortgage and then you inserted it into the video multiple times? This is where it's like PFT literally thinks I'm awed. Yeah, what are you doing, PFT? I have literally nothing to do with this video series.
The fart sound effects that always come out. No, it was a voiceover and they had me record the ad afterwards.
Go take a cold shower, horny boy. They had me record the ad afterwards and I read it once and they plug in every time there's a player profile.
But I redid it from the championship. That makes it way better.
When Hank played it for me, it was shocking. I was shocked.
I've gotten criticism in my broadcasting career. I've gotten destroyed for this.
Well, no, so here's what it is. You get an F-minus at Medill.
Here's what it is. Because they replayed it the first time I heard it, I was like, that was crazy, but it was probably just a one-time thing.
And then every time I heard it, I was like, Jake doesn't know I say mortgage. I miss that at once.
What was going through your head when you said mortgage? I genuinely thought that's it. I didn't know the tea was silent.
You didn't? Wait, you just learned that the tea in mortgage was silent? Yeah. Wow.
You should just blame it on the pink Whitney you were drinking in the booth. Yeah, that's true.
I'm not blaming anybody. It's my fault.
Take accountability, Billy. Pro tip, say you were drunk.
There's footage of you drinking Pink Whitney during the broadcast. Take accountability.
That's a fact. It's my fault.
I messed up. That's a deep drive to the left.
There we go. All right, let's do some numbers.
Send everyone on their way. Happy Masters.
Oh, by the the way, how about you guys? I'm going to have a double dad, two-kid Masters nap. It's a little different.
Yeah. That's basically my favorite.
Are you going to get a darker pair of the New Balances? I have to. 34.
Dude, shout out Steven Shea Who When he

He has a boy

Around the same age as my son

And he

Unironically uses

No

Son

He unironically uses the hashtag

Boy dad

Because

We don't get included in everything

But now I can use both

Okay

99

32

888

Big copy Ortiz

Thank you. both.
Okay. 99.
32. 8.
8. 8.
Big Papi Ortiz. 80.
I'm never gonna win that. Love you guys.
How funny is that? Do you say sharks don't go to school? Church. What does that mean? Is that from Finding Nemo? Is that a Nemo? No, it's just...

I'm talking away.

I don't know what I'm to say.

I'm sage anyway.

Today's another day to find you.

Shine away.

I'll be coming for your love. Oh, okay.
Take on me. Take me young.
I'll be gone. We do want to Believe us today I won't send it But I'll keep going away But I'll learn like it's okay Say your please Take me me.
Take me on. I'll be gone.
And I don't know what you say. Yeah, please get a lot of hope.
But just to play my worries away you're all the things I've got to remember when you shine away I'll be coming for you anyway take on me take Take me on.

I'll be gone.

You don't need. I'm out.