March Madness Recap Even Though Our Brains Are Leaking Out Of Our Ears
We recap everything. It was awesome. Must listen.
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Transcript
Speaker 1
Hey, pardon my take, listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music.
Speaker 2 The Pro Football Football Show is presented by the Chevy Silverado. Built for the hustle, ready for the game, Chevy Silverado is America's most dependable full-size truck.
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Speaker 1 On today's part of my take, we come back from
Speaker 1 the last three days of,
Speaker 1 I don't want to say war, but it
Speaker 1 is.
Speaker 4 It's a type of war.
Speaker 1 It's
Speaker 1 war mode.
Speaker 1 We were.
Speaker 4 I honestly, you have to go into a situation like this ready to kill your bracket, ready to straight up murder it.
Speaker 1 And we were just gambling everything and watching everything, consuming so much basketball. I think we've spent 30 plus hours in a bar bar the last four days, more than that, even.
Speaker 1
But we're going to recap it all. We have it all.
It's going to be a great show. I think that these are the best shows.
Actually, you know what? I'll save this for the other side.
Speaker 5 When cool, creamy ranch meets tangy, bold buffalo, the whole is greater than the sum of its sauce. Say howdy, partner, to new Buffalo Ranch sauce, only at McDonald's for a limited time.
Speaker 4 At participating, McDonald's.
Speaker 4 Now, in the streets, there is violence,
Speaker 4 and then a lot of some work to be done.
Speaker 4 Lord plays the hand of love washing,
Speaker 4 and then I can't blame all on the sun.
Speaker 4 Oh no, we're gonna rock down to Elite Trick Avenue,
Speaker 4 and then we'll take it higher.
Speaker 4 Oh, we're gonna rock down
Speaker 1 It's part of my tape presented by Bar Stew Sports.
Speaker 4 Welcome to Pardon My Tape.
Speaker 4 Hey, it's PFT here, reminding you that Boars Head makes game day entertaining elevated and effortless.
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Speaker 1 It's Monday, March 22nd, and everyone in America's bracket is busted.
Speaker 4 Officially, right? Or at least on the major platforms. I don't think anyone's got a correct bracket.
Speaker 1
They are all so, so busted. So, so busted.
And here was what I was going to say at the beginning of the show, before the ad, which you should always listen to. Don't skip that shit.
Speaker 1 Don't skip that shit.
Speaker 1 We don't gamble well. Don't skip that shit.
Speaker 4 Well, a lot of times during the ads, we put in the best parts of the show.
Speaker 1
The secret tokens you're talking about. Yeah.
Oh, yeah. Well, don't say that.
Well, I mean, the QR codes for Bitcoins.
Speaker 1 What I was going to say is, I love these shows. These specific shows that we're about to do right now because
Speaker 1 we match the mood of our listeners. We match the mood of America.
Speaker 1 We match the mood of everyone, guy, and girl who has spent the last four days watching wall-to-wall basketball, whose eyes are bleeding, whose ears are ringing, whose brain is melting, and we still have eight more games to go.
Speaker 4
My ass is asleep. My ass has been asleep for the last like 12 hours.
You know how on your phone you can see like how many steps that you've taken and monitor like how active you've been?
Speaker 4 I'm at an all-time low, I think, for steps taken over the course of three days, maybe in the history of the universe.
Speaker 4 And I bet you, if there was an app on that showed your couch, how much ass time instead of screen time, how much ass time I had on my couch this weekend, or it was probably what, like
Speaker 1 38 hours? Yep.
Speaker 4 38 hours of ass time on a couch watching college basketball.
Speaker 1 I have bed sores. I have, I, they, when
Speaker 4 stung in my asshole today, something stung me.
Speaker 1 I have, I have straight-up bed sores from the couch when they, like, when someone is bedridden and they have to like rotate their body position because they get so sore from just doing nothing that is what i have on my whole body you got to rotate my brain just is throbbing like if my brain is pulsating in the worst type of way and uh guess what i loved every second of it yeah it's absolute chaos the brackets are completely busted and we're here to break it all down it took a year of not having march madness to make you really realize how much you love it yeah like i love feeling this miserable right now.
Speaker 4 And I want to walk something back. But I didn't get stung on my asshole.
Speaker 4 What happened was I felt a weird tingling sensation on my butt, and it turned out that my asshole fell asleep from sitting on a chair too long.
Speaker 1 Yeah.
Speaker 4 First time that's ever happened to me.
Speaker 1 My body right now is consists of
Speaker 1 like part cores light, 75% Tums,
Speaker 1 probably 85% just poop.
Speaker 4 100% reason to remember the name.
Speaker 1 And like 175% of just losing bets and bracket busters.
Speaker 4 Hank, is the podcast out yet?
Speaker 1
All right, let's do it. Let's break it down.
So we're going to go region by region because we need guardrails for ourselves on this show.
Speaker 1 I walked over to PFT at the bar an hour ago. I was like, hey, let's try to do it region by region because I was just thinking about how we're going to talk about this.
Speaker 1 And I don't, I need like memory triggers for all of these games and moments.
Speaker 4
I don't remember. Like, I was looking through all the games here.
I don't remember anything about USC against Drake.
Speaker 1
Did that game happen? Yeah, Evan Mobin, baby. Oh, Mobley, baby.
Number two pick. Andy Edfield.
Shout out.
Speaker 1 One of my favorite stories is whenever a school gets like a top recruit and also at the same time hires that top recruit's dad as the coaching assistant coach. Yeah.
Speaker 4 Jackson State could be a good person.
Speaker 1 I would do that all the time.
Speaker 1
All the time. All right.
Well, Jake is also, we tasked Jake with getting us our preview of One Shining Moment where he's been documenting what he thinks will be in One Shining Moment.
Speaker 1 And we'll get to that. So let's start.
Speaker 1 Region by region, we're going to start in the South because I think the South obviously has the number one story, and that is Oral Roberts, the second 15 seed all-time, the first being Dunk City, Andy Edfield, and now at USC,
Speaker 1
Florida Gulf Coast in 2013. Oral Roberts is the second all-time.
They stun Florida. They are the story of the weekend.
They are into the Sweet 16.
Speaker 1 And also, they kicked the shit out of Ohio State. Didn't kick the shit out of them, but it was that was a crazy game as well.
Speaker 4 Yeah, anytime a 15 beats a two, it does count as a shit kicking.
Speaker 4 Now, because we're counting every time we talk about whether or not it's an ass beating, we're in our own heads factoring in the spread that we gambled on. Right.
Speaker 4 So it's like, yeah, according to that, it was an ass kicking.
Speaker 4 It's interesting watching which big J's are making the oral jokes and which ones are staying away. And I'll just January, February, oral.
Speaker 4 John Rossi, if you're listening, either that or death taxes oral.
Speaker 1 Either way. So I have a question for you.
Speaker 1
I have a question for you. Oral Roberts, if you're an Ohio State fan.
We should make those t-shirts. We should make those taxes.
Death taxes oral oral.
Speaker 4
Death taxes oral. I said gluck, gluck over chomp, chomp.
We beat the Gators.
Speaker 1 Yes.
Speaker 1 If you're Ohio State, so the fact that it's named Oral Roberts, Oral Bob beats you, the fact that that's the name of the school makes it so significantly worse because there are like 15 beating a two is something people will bring up forever for Ohio State.
Speaker 1 Now, the question is, is it better or worse for Ohio State fans that Oral Bob is now in the Sweet 16 because they also beat Florida?
Speaker 1 Is it worse because now their story becomes bigger and more like you know mythological? Or is it better because we're now talking about them like Oral Bob is in the Sweet 16.
Speaker 1 I don't even remember who they beat in the first round.
Speaker 4 Yeah, I actually don't think that Oral Roberts University is allowed to technically go dancing. They're like Liberty, where it's like the town in Footloose.
Speaker 1 Yeah, it is Footloose.
Speaker 4 Yeah, where you can't actually advance the dance. But I think, Big Kat, you're on to something.
Speaker 4 I don't think it's as bad under most circumstances because now the story is this school that sounds like a blowjob,
Speaker 1 they're going on a little run here.
Speaker 4 But with Ohio State, you have to factor in the Michigan factor, which is
Speaker 4 perhaps the most active message board community, their fans are going to bring up the loss to Oral Roberts more than any other possible rival school in the entire country could.
Speaker 1 And it becomes a funny piece of trivia that will forever be brought up. Like if you lose as a two-seed and it is to pretty much any other team,
Speaker 1 yeah, or Lehigh or Colgate, even, like, oh, you're going to make two-piece jokes. Who cares?
Speaker 1 Oral Roberts is a killer.
Speaker 4
As long as it's not to, like, butt-fuck university. Right.
That's the only way it could be worse. Yeah.
It's going to be, but then Ohio State's going to have like the easy comeback, which is
Speaker 4
Oral has beaten us more times than Jim Harbaugh has. That's true.
And so then Oral over Harbaugh, and then that's a way to pivot off that.
Speaker 4 But it's not good, but it would be a lot worse if it was just they won that one game and then they lost in the second round. Right.
Speaker 1
All right. So they're the story of the tournament.
They're going to be matching up against Must Buss. Shout out our guy, Musk Buss, Eric Musselman, and the Arkansas Razorbacks into the Sweet 16.
Speaker 1 I love this about the Musk Bus, and especially shout out our guy, Anthony Ruda, who hooked us up with Muss and is on their staff, and I think he does most of the scheduling.
Speaker 1
Little fun fact: Arkansas played Oral Roberts in December. They beat him by 11.
They were actually down at halftime, I believe. And the reason why they played him, and
Speaker 1 this is March Madness, if it's like the one thing that defines March Madness is coaches' stories and the narratives of players and how we build everything up. But
Speaker 1 Eric Musselman wanted to play teams that he thought, lower conference teams, that he thought were going to win their conference and be in the tournament. So that's why they scheduled Oral Roberts.
Speaker 1
I think they also played Abilene Christian. They played Abilene Christian, Oral Roberts, and North Texas.
So there is.
Speaker 1 So this one is all by design that he was like, there's a chance we could play one of these teams. So we want to schedule the best teams in the lowest conferences.
Speaker 1 So this is, if you were sitting here, and I think I remember watching that game, it's like this This is five-dimensional chess.
Speaker 1
Yeah, I think I bet on that game in December and I watched it and I know I bet on that game. And they hung tough.
They did. Oral Roberts by 11, Abilene Christian by 13.
Right. And North Texas by 15.
Speaker 1 But
Speaker 1 the fact that a December game between Arkansas and Oral Roberts was a preview for the Sweet 16, a shot at the Elite Eight, is crazy. And now, so that game's going to be great.
Speaker 4
I'm a Must Bus believer. Yeah.
The runs that they go on, when they decide to step on the gas pedal of the Must Bus and they turned it on against Texas Tech, it was like, there's no going back.
Speaker 4 They also have fun names. It's electric.
Speaker 1
Moses Moody, J.D. Note.
Yeah, fun names.
Speaker 4
I love it. Those are fun names.
Is there any other mouth-related team that they could, because they got Colgate, Monmouth? No, Monmouth's not in it.
Speaker 1 Monmouth's not in it.
Speaker 4 Knisis is in it.
Speaker 4 I think that's all the mouth I have.
Speaker 1 I think that is it. They have the opportunity to rip scum.
Speaker 1
Rip scum. Yeah, there we go, Jake.
Thank you, Jake. Nice, deep hole.
Speaker 1 All right, so that's one side of the, or one part of the bracket.
Speaker 1 The other side, it sucks that the way that they made the tournament this year, that it's Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday, because in a regular year, we would be doing the show on Thursday night, and I would be saying the Wisconsin Badgers are the greatest team in the country.
Speaker 1 Because what they did to UNC, your boy Roy,
Speaker 1 it's COVID year. 29-0 in first-round games.
Speaker 1 29-0 in first-round games until he ran into the buzzsaw that is the Wisconsin Badgers.
Speaker 4 I agree with you. This performance from UNC was abysmal.
Speaker 4 The only way I can describe it is UNC looked like they were playing pool basketball on offense. They would get the ball, pivot around, maybe like take a couple steps, pass it.
Speaker 4 They were having like no sort of motion.
Speaker 4 It just looked completely uncoordinated.
Speaker 4 It was a painful game to watch as a die-hard UNC horter.
Speaker 1 I do like UNC as a die-hard Duke hater. I've always had love for UNC.
Speaker 1 I even spent, after the game today, Wisconsin and Baylor, I spent about 20 minutes just going back into Duke Men's basketball Twitter and just retweeting all their losses. Rude.
Speaker 1 It made me feel better. You don't want me to make, you want, you want your friend to feel better?
Speaker 4 I do. I want you to.
Speaker 1 We all cope a different way.
Speaker 1 But either way, that Friday night game, like if you, if you had not watched any college basketball, if you wiped away all the records and you watched all the games on Friday, you would say Wisconsin is the best team in the country.
Speaker 1 And then they showed up on Sunday, and Baylor is so much better than Wisconsin.
Speaker 4
So that's what my thought was. Jake and I were in the moron Madness pool together.
We picked Wisconsin because because we thought that, like, wow, Wisconsin looks legit.
Speaker 4
They're going to score some points even against Baylor. We picked them.
That was an unfortunate pick. And Jake, I would have given you my half of the earnings if we had won the $5,000.
Speaker 1
Means a lot. I appreciate it.
Well, no, you would have given... I thought you were going to give half to charity and then half to Jake.
Speaker 4 No,
Speaker 4 I was going to give Jake that, and then I was going to give my match.
Speaker 1 I was going to match it and match the donation for charity.
Speaker 4 And then I was going to give my half of the Bitcoin to TJ for Rutgers.
Speaker 4 That's what's awesome about losing bets that are in a team environment is you can say whatever you want after the fact.
Speaker 1
I was going to match two, Jake and Jack. Big that was, yeah.
I was. I was actually going to match with interest.
Speaker 1 So I was going to match as of Thursday, whatever the
Speaker 1 short you're thinking of me.
Speaker 1 I would have donated some to the Barstool Fund. Oh, wow.
Speaker 1
I actually would have. Wow.
Yeah. How much? A thousand.
A thousand? Why not two? Maybe. No, two.
Speaker 4 If you donate a thousand, I'll match.
Speaker 1
Okay, I'll match two. I'll double.
If I won. Yeah.
Speaker 4 No, no, no. But right now, like, I'll.
Speaker 1 no, no, no, no, but hypothetical
Speaker 1
thousand. I actually would have, right, and I would have matched, doubled.
Yeah, damn, you know what? I'll triple it. I'll triple your hypothetical match.
There it is. Now, look at that.
Speaker 1 We just raised $5,000 for the bar still flung
Speaker 4
it. If Wisconsin had covered that spread.
Yeah.
Speaker 4 It looked like they were playing two different sports.
Speaker 4 You should not be allowed to dunk as much as Baylor was dunking today.
Speaker 4 Especially knowing that
Speaker 4 Wisconsin's game is predicated off of taking charges, calling intelligent timeouts, and just
Speaker 4 two-foot set shots that go off the backboard.
Speaker 4 They're a great YMCA team, and Baylor was like scraping their heads on the rim.
Speaker 1 Well, it really was, and I'm not saying this just to say this because I know that we like to poke fun at the sadness that I experienced as a sports fan.
Speaker 1
This wasn't the heartbreak game. They had to beat Baylor in an unbelievable upset for me to then have my heart broken.
This was never going to be, like,
Speaker 1 as good as they were on Friday, and that's so much fun. Tournament wins, never apologize for tournament wins.
Speaker 1
If your team wins in the tournament, I don't care if they lose the next game like Wisconsin lost in the second round. Friday night was fucking awesome.
I had a great time. I read all the recaps.
Speaker 1
It was awesome. The Baylor is just so, so good.
Their guards are so good defensively. And I'm not going to.
They're just kids, okay? They're just kids.
Speaker 1 I want to criticize, but I'm not going to because they're just kids.
Speaker 4 Well, I'm not criticizing when I say that Baylor was just like way, way too much.
Speaker 1 No, I know. I was going to say other stuff about Greg Gard.
Speaker 4
He's much better than Wisconsin. Greg Gard's just a kid.
I'd like to put my hand up and say I apologize for not giving Baylor enough respect.
Speaker 4 Turns out Baylor was a team that people weren't respecting as much.
Speaker 1 Well, so the reason why Baylor lost their respect was they had COVID, and when they came back, they then lost to Kansas. Then they got bounced in the Big 12 tournament.
Speaker 1 Everyone's like, they're a different team now after the COVID. So
Speaker 1 it was like
Speaker 1 people kind of forgot about them.
Speaker 1 By the way, Baylor, if we're ⁇ I'm not going to try to take away what you're about to do with your one-shining moments, but if we're talking like storylines and what beat writers are looking to write about in the middle of the week, the Jackson Moffat, the Mullet kid, who just Matthew Mayer.
Speaker 1 Matthew Mayer. What's his name? Why did I say Jackson Mayer?
Speaker 4 Jackson Moffat isn't actually his name.
Speaker 1 Matthew.
Speaker 1 Oh, what's oh, his Twitter handle is Jackson Moffat.
Speaker 4 Okay, I was about to say if Jackson Moffett isn't also the name of a Mullet guy, then he needs to do some work. Yeah, his name.
Speaker 1
Wait, no, that's a different guy. Wait, Mullet Bros.
He's the, oh, he's the bench Mullet bro of Matthew Mayer. Got it.
Okay. So when you search, wow, Jackson Moffat, good job, dude.
Speaker 1 Because he, if you search Baylor Mullet, Jackson Moffat comes up first wow he's coming i honestly never heard
Speaker 1 of that's actually yeah because that actually is also part of march's the bench guys and we'll get to abilene christian the bench
Speaker 1 by the way i need to correct myself okay thank you yeah i didn't care um the uh the bench game didn't play a minute for abiline christian doing horns down down the court after the game going viral so the bench mob guys and ucla bros so uh anyway matthew mayer
Speaker 1 uh he's gonna get get a lot of stories written.
Speaker 1 I mean, he catches the ball in that
Speaker 1
elbow extended and he's just wet. And he's got a sick mullet, and Baylor just jumps all over the place, and their guards are insane.
And yeah, you're right. I think Baylor, we'll see.
Speaker 1 Hopefully the musk buster is here.
Speaker 4 Yeah, I'm rooting for the must-bust. Now, did Jackson Moffitt, Matthew Mayer, did he have a mullet before the tournament? Yes.
Speaker 1
Or is he a tournament mullet? No, he had it before. I love that.
I knew it wasn't.
Speaker 4 I love that.
Speaker 4 Because there's a difference between a tournament mullet, because I think the guy for, I could be wrong, but I think the guy from Gonzaga that's got the handlebar mustache I think that's a tournament handlebar so the guy that looks kind of like like if Billy played in Leonard Skynyrd you know the guy I'm talking about yes that to me seems like a tournament facial hair this guy I think is legit I remember tweeting about Matthew Mayer like sometime in early February because he put lightning bolts in his mullet.
Speaker 1 That's sick.
Speaker 4 And I was like, oh, fuck, this guy's awesome. That guy fucks.
Speaker 1 And then he turned out to show up and beat me.
Speaker 1
We forgot about Villanova. Huh, that was funny.
There's always, the Villanova is the quintessential.
Speaker 1
I think Winthrop was even trending on Friday before the game because everyone picked Winthrop. The 12-5, Villanova struggled down the stretch.
Colin Gillespie gets hurt, all these things.
Speaker 1 And then, oh yeah, Villanova turns out they're still pretty good, and Jay Wright's still a really good coach.
Speaker 4 They still have Jay Wright.
Speaker 1 Yeah, and they got to the Sweet 16 fairly easy, even though North Texas upset Purdue and that made it a little easier for him.
Speaker 4 Yeah, there are some things that have changed this year that I don't know if they're going to impact the future of the sport entirely, but one of the things that's changed is the coach is not wearing suits all the time.
Speaker 4
He just kind of gave up on that. I think that if it's Jay Wright or Tony Bennett, like those guys are suit guys.
I get uncomfortable seeing them not wearing suits on the sidelines. Yeah, I agree.
Speaker 1 Like
Speaker 4 if we're talking about Huggy Bear, Huggy Bear should be allowed to wear like a robe and slippers.
Speaker 1 Rick Petino's a suit guy.
Speaker 4
Yeah, white suit. Yep.
Very one pants.
Speaker 1 Oh, I have something for you. I'm just tied around his leg.
Speaker 1
Yeah? Yeah, no, we'll get to it. We'll get to Iona.
Okay. Yeah.
Speaker 4 I'm scared. Yeah.
Speaker 1 Yeah, you should be. Okay.
Speaker 4 Do I have a stalker, too?
Speaker 1 He's going for you now.
Speaker 4 Oh, fuck.
Speaker 1 Fuck. Keep listening, folks.
Speaker 1
I'm done making Rick. Okay, yeah.
Stay tuned for that.
Speaker 1 Keep listening, folks.
Speaker 4 I'll put it this way. If you've won a national championship, you should be required to wear a suit on the side of the game.
Speaker 1 Ah, Bill Self, no.
Speaker 4 Everyone else, yes.
Speaker 4 I like Bill Self in a suit guy.
Speaker 1
I think Bill Self has a nice, like, he's a good polo guy, but I agree. Coach K is a suit guy.
Jay Wright's guy. If he was in the tournament.
If you suit,
Speaker 1 if he was in the tournament, which is...
Speaker 1 I actually, like, it's been so long I can't even envision Duke in the tournament.
Speaker 4 What is Coach K doing right now? Do you think he's watching the games?
Speaker 1 Yeah, for sure.
Speaker 4 He's probably got a burner out there.
Speaker 1 You know what he's probably doing? He's probably writing down notes of every kid that took a three when they were up too much. And being like, well,
Speaker 1 going to have to go barge into that locker room next year and coach that team for him.
Speaker 4
Well, you know what it is? Coach K's probably got burners. He's probably the guy that was in the Ohio State players like DMs on Instagram, like threatening his life.
Dude, this is the first time.
Speaker 4
Oh, by the way, that sucks. I know that we joke about the burner lifestyle on the show, which I still appreciate.
I love all the burners out there. Burner Gang Squad Up.
Speaker 1 Shout out Youngstown Bob, my burner person. Yeah, but
Speaker 4 it definitely goes way too far.
Speaker 4 That's fucked up.
Speaker 1
They're just kids. Yeah.
Just say it. Just kids.
Which I want to sell that shirt, but I realize out of context, it probably wouldn't be good to walk around with the shirt that she says.
Speaker 1 They're just kids.
Speaker 4 They're just kids, yeah because you can interpret that one or two ways
Speaker 1 buy that one by the death tax as an oral yeah
Speaker 1 actually let's just put
Speaker 1 one on one on the back death tax oral in the back they're just kids on the front and then yeah
Speaker 1 oh fuck all right so let's all right oh the other thing i wanted to say shout out mean shout out north texas mean green yeah i just love i love their jerseys i love the mean green i also did you know this fun fact mean green is because of joe green yeah yeah yeah i forgot i i i don't think i even knew it i thought that that was a fake out i thought somebody was psyching me out when they told me that was yeah there's no way they renamed their entire program after joe green because no because and because the yinsers
Speaker 1 thought that north texas when joe green went to play for pittsburgh he was mean joe green they thought
Speaker 1 The Yinsers thought like, it's a classic like college friend meeting post-college friends and being like, oh, I thought that just was your name.
Speaker 1 They thought he got the name Mean Joe Green from Texas, North Texas, because they were the Mean Green. And really, they just got,
Speaker 1 he got it at North Texas, not because of North Texas.
Speaker 4 Wait, so he was renamed Mean Joe Green
Speaker 1 after
Speaker 1
North Texas. He was Mean Joe Green.
And then he went to Pittsburgh and the Yinsers were like, dude, that's sick that your team name is Mean Green. Yeah.
And your last name's Green. He's like, no.
Speaker 1 I don't know if I have that right.
Speaker 4 I'm still a little confused by this.
Speaker 4 I think they named the team Mean Green after Joe Green. Look it up.
Speaker 1 Look it up. Look up North Texas Mean Green.
Speaker 1 They also have their nickname, their
Speaker 1 mascot, Scrappy the Eagle.
Speaker 1 Right, so they were like, secondary mascots,
Speaker 1 the albino squirrel.
Speaker 4
Yeah, that's pretty cool. I like that, too.
I also wish every time I see UNT, I wish they were called the College University of North Texas.
Speaker 4 Yeah. That's probably cool.
Speaker 4 We could put that on a shirt, too.
Speaker 1 Yeah, that would be very cool. Do you have it, Hank?
Speaker 6 It doesn't say, I'm trying to find out what their mascot and name was before Joe Green.
Speaker 1 Right.
Speaker 6 It looks like it was probably just the Eagles, though, because they have Scrappy.
Speaker 1
No, but I'm telling you, hold on. I'm going to find it.
I'm going to find it.
Speaker 4 The albino squirrel is pretty cool.
Speaker 1
Okay, here we go. Here we go.
I'm going to read it to you. Ready? The name Mean Green was adopted by fans and media in 1966 for
Speaker 1 North Texas football defensive squad to finish the season second in the nation with Joe Green.
Speaker 1 Hold on, where did I read it? Okay.
Speaker 6 It doesn't say anything about before, though.
Speaker 4
It sounds like they called their defense like the Purple People Leaders. It sounds like they gave that nickname to their defense because of Mean Joe Green.
And then they were like, you know what?
Speaker 4
The Mean Green is just a cool name. Let's stick with it.
Kind of like the football team. You win a division championship, roll with the football team as your name.
Speaker 1
Yeah. I like my version better, though.
I see the version of the version. I still didn't really understand.
I don't even know if there's an official offense.
Speaker 1 Pittsburgh was like, dude, how's your name? Your name's Mean Joe Green because of Texas. And he's like, no, that's just because I'm mean and my name's Joe Green.
Speaker 1 And then they're like, but also, North Texas is green, right? Okay, got it. I thought you were saying, oh, shit, maybe we are mean, mean, green.
Speaker 4 I thought you were saying there was a battle going on between Jensers and people in Texas
Speaker 4
over how they got the name. Kind of like the license plate battle that always rages on between Ohio and North Carolina about who invented the Wright brothers.
Yeah, no, this was.
Speaker 1 I just made this up in my head, I think. Now that I'm replaying it, but I really like this version weekend.
Speaker 1 No, but I like this version uh-huh they were just like damn isn't that crazy coincidence that you you played for the mean green and your last name's green and but it's not there there are some give and takes to this opening weekend and how it's been scheduled out uh positive
Speaker 4 all the brackets we're lining them up we're playing like one side of the bracket a day i love that it's easier to keep track of negative uh our brains are just i don't know what it just turned to chowder i'm so confused
Speaker 4 you get a podcast like this coming out on monday morning okay wait.
Speaker 1
I got one last note about the South. I'm not going to say anything bad.
Oh, I have two last notes. I'm not going to say anything bad about Purdue, but goddamn it, Purdue.
Speaker 1
The first time I think I've ever said nice things about Purdue and being like, watch out for Purdue. They fucking do that.
So that will teach me to never be nice to Purdue again.
Speaker 1
And then the other note is, shout out Virginia Tech for being the first team eliminated from the round of 64. And they had a great season.
Yeah. Congrats.
Number three in the ACC.
Speaker 4 You went to the big dances here.
Speaker 1 Yep, that actually matters, okay?
Speaker 1
All right, let's go to the Midwest. Midwest.
Yeah, before we do that. I'm not going back to college to be your friend.
I'm going so I can get Uber One for students. It saves you on Uber and Uber Eats.
Speaker 1 I'm there for $0 delivery fee on cheeseburgers, up to 10% off smoothies, and 6% Uber credits back on rides. Just to be clear, I'm there for savings, not whatever you think college is for.
Speaker 7
Get Uber One for students. A membership to save on Uber and Uber Eats.
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Speaker 7 Eligibility and member terms apply.
Speaker 1 Okay, Midwest.
Speaker 1 So,
Speaker 1 turns out Loyal of Chicago is very, very good, which actually we knew.
Speaker 1 And if you want to make the argument that they were screwed with an eighth seed and Illinois was screwed more being matched up with them as an eighth seed, I'll buy that argument because they're not an eighth seed.
Speaker 1 But holy shit, they actually like kicked the shit out of Illinois. And Illinois is really, really good.
Speaker 1
Like I thought Illinois, Illinois was in my power rankings number one in the last three weeks of the season. Yeah.
Oh, wow, it was rucks.
Speaker 4 I had a future on him like a sucker. Uh-huh.
Speaker 4 But it turns out that like Kofi Coburn, despite being like the biggest person to ever exist, can be defended against if you have just like a bunch of guys that are 30 pounds, kind of overweight, with raggedy facial hair that make insanely good passes.
Speaker 1 Cameron Crutwig is a good thing. I love Cameron Crutwig.
Speaker 4 He is not overweight.
Speaker 1 He is a king. He is a completely tuned athlete.
Speaker 4 He's a king.
Speaker 4 Sister Gene.
Speaker 4 I'm going to go off on Sister Gene real quick. Wait,
Speaker 1 you want me to read her pregame Scott?
Speaker 4 Well, that's what I was going to say. Yeah.
Speaker 1
I'll read you. I'll read it.
I'll read it and then you go off. So she did the pregame prayer.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 And she said, as we play the fighting align I, we ask for special help to overcome the team and get a great win. We hope to score early and make our opponents nervous.
Speaker 1
We have a great opportunity to convert rebounds. As this team makes about 50% of layups and 30% of its three points.
Our defense can take care of that.
Speaker 4
She thinks that she's Kirk Goldsbury. She thinks that she's an analytics person right now.
Unreal.
Speaker 4 I saw somebody react to this tweet. I have to echo the sentiment.
Speaker 4 They said,
Speaker 4 Sister Gene, this is not a nice prayer.
Speaker 4 I'm not sure what they teach in convent, but praying for victory of games and praying to have the opposition nervous is very Christian, but not very Christ follower-like. Whoa.
Speaker 4 So, Sister Gene is being attacked.
Speaker 4 She does tend to overshadow the players sometimes.
Speaker 4 You know what?
Speaker 4 I'm not going to go off on Sister Gene like I thought I would.
Speaker 4 Turns out she is a 101-year-old nun, so it feels like maybe that might be an instance of potentially punching down a little bit.
Speaker 1 I think that's when you do go after her.
Speaker 4 Speak truth to power. Yeah, I think Sister Gene's a witch.
Speaker 1 Well, here's the thing: no, I straight up thinking I think she's a witch. PFT,
Speaker 1 Sister Gene, like Big God, if Big God's given a
Speaker 1 big religion is given a presentation of why God exists, Sister Gene should be the number one slide. Because, you know, we've all prayed to God for wins, and it very rarely happens.
Speaker 1 Sister Gene is somehow just like not, like, has a direct line to God and being like, hey, can we get in a Sweet 16 this year? That'd be nice.
Speaker 4
Well, she might be coming for God's throne. That's what I'm saying.
Like, that's crazy. I think that she's a witch.
Speaker 6 The final four was nice, but can we, you know, maybe up the ante this time?
Speaker 4 I think it's like a little dark magic. I think that she's trying to, what she's doing right now, and Big Cat, you're falling for it.
Speaker 4
She's drawing people away from God's light and more towards Sister Jean's light. So it's like the Beatles saying they were bigger than Jesus.
Is that what Sister Gene is doing? Is she usurping God?
Speaker 4 Is she the Megan Markle of the kingdom of heaven?
Speaker 1 What an awesome encore for her, though.
Speaker 6 We've been talking about the me and Joe Green thing. I think it's only fair that this is what Loyola Chicago does.
Speaker 1
Sister Gene. Yes.
Becomes the name of the, instead of the Ramblers. Yeah.
They're the Sister Gene. Yes.
Speaker 4 The clutch.
Speaker 1 I mean, think about it.
Speaker 6 Every time you hear Loyola Chicago, you're going to think Sister Gene.
Speaker 1 Yeah, you are. Mean Gene Green.
Speaker 1 Also, I like that she doesn't even try to clap anymore.
Speaker 1 She just lightly pats her hand on the back of her hand, which might be because she's like 120, but I still, anyone who's that efficient with their time and space, like I'm cool with that.
Speaker 4 But I do like watching Loyola play. Yeah, of course.
Speaker 1 They're awesome.
Speaker 4
The passes that Crutwig passes, it's crazy. And also, it's funny when you tweet about Crutwig at the same time as you're tweeting about soccer.
People tend to think that you're not watching battle.
Speaker 4 They're like, why are you talking about why are you talking about soccer, bro? It's like, no, Cameron Crutwig is not, in fact, a Bundesliga striker. He is a powerhouse of a sitter for Loyola Chicago.
Speaker 1 Here's a crazy thing.
Speaker 1
Have you heard this? Have you seen this? Have you heard about this? People online. tend to think that I look like Cameron Crutwig because that's all my mentions.
I don't see it. I don't see it.
Speaker 1 I don't see either.
Speaker 4 It's like, so with Big Cat, if anybody is like a little heavy, a portly gentleman,
Speaker 4 a man who can afford good meals.
Speaker 1 Instead of talking about his weight, why don't you talk about his sick footwork?
Speaker 4 Yeah, everyone knows about your drop. That's what really reminds me of that.
Speaker 1 That's what people were being like, oh, shit, have I seen that? Have I seen that footwork in the low post before? Oh, yeah, that's Big Cat.
Speaker 4 Yeah, Big Cat's got eyes in the back of his head. Like, he's a great passer.
Speaker 4 But anytime someone's like a little chunkier might have some facial hair, it's Big Cat. Anytime there's a man or a woman woman with long hair and sunglasses, it's me.
Speaker 1
Yeah, I feel bad for Illinois. They had an unbelievable season.
They just got like straight up, they got out-coached. They got out-coached.
Brad Underwood got his
Speaker 1 lunch stolen by Porter Moses.
Speaker 4 He got sweaty again. Did you notice that?
Speaker 1 Porter Moser. What is that?
Speaker 1
I think it's Moser. I can tell you.
Porter Moses, though. Never not Moses.
It's fucking God. God's on this team.
Why don't you think their coach is named Moses? Hey, let me
Speaker 1
be a journalist here, Jake, in March. Like, I want to write my byline.
The lead will be,
Speaker 1 you thought they were led by God and Sister Gene. Turns out Moses is their coach.
Speaker 1 There you go. It is Porter
Speaker 1 Moser. Moses.
Speaker 1
Either way, Loyal Chicago is fucking good. There's seven in Ken Palm now.
They're the seventh-ranked team in Ken Palm.
Speaker 1 That's why I think, like, if you're Illinois, I think your range of emotions are, one, Brad Underwood really fucked this game up. Two, that was an awesome season, and you're probably in good hands.
Speaker 1 and yeah, it didn't work out, but whatever. Illinois has had a rough go of it for a while, so it's good that they're back.
Speaker 1
And then three, they got totally fucked by the fact that Loyola Chicago was an eight in their fucking bracket. Yeah.
And that team is really goddamn good.
Speaker 4 Yeah,
Speaker 4
they made a lot of people look like fools picking against them. Hand up.
I did that too. And now they get to move on.
It looks like they're going to play against Oregon State.
Speaker 4 There's seven minutes left.
Speaker 1
No, let's not seven. 7-45.
Oregon State's the best team in the country as of right now.
Speaker 4 Listen, I have a significant. I went on tilt after I lost all my potential earnings and donations in about a 30-minute span when Rutgers went out and then Florida blew it at the end.
Speaker 4 And so then I went on tilt, over-corrected the other way, fired a missile at Oregon State. So
Speaker 4 I'm hoping they can keep up that spread right now because that would be wonderful for me personally. But then Loyola against Oregon State, like Loyola is going to go to the Elite Eight.
Speaker 1 Well,
Speaker 1 if Oregon State wins this game and we'll finish it it by the end of the show, we'll know.
Speaker 1 They have like the way they're playing right now, they have some of those UConn vibes where UConn just wasn't the best team, and then they just didn't lose after going.
Speaker 1 No, wait, that was the Kemba year, was when they didn't lose going from the big East.
Speaker 1
The year that they won as the A seed, was that right? They were a seven in 2014, a three in 2011. They won as a seven.
They won as both. With Kevin Olley.
Yeah, that was Tebas.
Speaker 1
Yeah, yeah, right, right. But Oregon State's just getting hot at the right time.
The other thing with this
Speaker 1 bracket, Q's,
Speaker 1 Syracuse. The zone.
Speaker 1
The zone. The zone will fuck you over.
Those first zone minutes, West Virginia was listening. Listen,
Speaker 4 everyone's got a plan until they get zoned in the face. You think that you know the zone, and like looking at the matchup going into this, it's like Huggy Bear used to coach in the Biggies.
Speaker 4 He's seen the zone a few times, but you think that you know the zone. The zone has a way of sneaking up on you, and you can't.
Speaker 4 It's funny because I actually think that there is something to, you know, we talk about the lost starter of the mid-range jumper and how like nobody shoots, you know, 15, 16-foot jump shots anymore.
Speaker 4 Nate Oates has the one-point line to discourage kids from shooting it. That's actually kind of a weakness in that zone.
Speaker 4 You get a lot of looks from like 15, 16 feet, and the kids don't practice that shot anymore. Right, it's
Speaker 4 made. Yeah, so it's actually kind of worked its way back into fashion, and it's honestly like the most perfect invention in the history of college basketball.
Speaker 4 Like, I can't think of a gimmicky type offense or defense besides maybe the triple option at certain schools that has existed for this long and will always fuck you up even when you know that it's coming for you.
Speaker 4 Yeah.
Speaker 1 Well, the zone, you know it's coming and it still will like it hits you like a fucking car. Yeah.
Speaker 4 Dude, the zone in the first half, there were like air balls. There were side of the rim bricks.
Speaker 1
West Virginia's passes were to nobody. Yeah.
Jake didn't even see that. No, I was watching the game.
Yeah. Sorry.
Speaker 4 The zone had just
Speaker 4 I thought you were were talking about Liam.
Speaker 1 No.
Speaker 1 I was talking about
Speaker 1
Jim Boeheim hitting people with his car. Yeah.
That picture of the child.
Speaker 1 People really don't do forget.
Speaker 4 That picture of Jim Boeheim
Speaker 4 handing Tony Stewart a Syracuse Tony Stewart jersey.
Speaker 1 I couldn't believe it was real.
Speaker 1 It can't be real.
Speaker 4 I think it's real.
Speaker 1
It can't be real. All right.
Buddy Boeheim is incredible, by the way. Yes.
Buddy Boeheim is a great reminder why we aren't NBA scouts.
Speaker 1 I don't want to steal Gar Foreman and John Paxton's
Speaker 1
territory here, but I always see the best player in the tournament. I'm like, that guy's the best player in the world.
Buddy Boeheim would be my number one pick if I were the Houston Rockets.
Speaker 1
Buddy Boeheim, dude, he can't miss. He has gone, he scored 25 points.
He went six for 13.
Speaker 1
In the last four games, which are all like postseason games, ACC tournament in the NCAA tournament, he's shooting 55% from three. He's 24 for 43.
He just doesn't miss.
Speaker 1 I would use my first pick on him. I'm telling you, he is going to be a 10-time all-star in the NBA.
Speaker 4 Meanwhile, Kate Cunningham can hit a shot.
Speaker 1 Yeah, there you go.
Speaker 4
It's weird. So Buddy Behim is the ultimate guy that you post the gif of the guy walking on fire.
Anytime Buddy Behim makes two threes in a row, because the orange pops, the flames work.
Speaker 4
But your mind... Like, you tend to underestimate Buddy Behim when you first see him because you just think that he's Brad Calapari.
Yes. And Brad Calapari, what's his tattoo earned?
Speaker 4
Brad Calapari earned so that Buddy Beheim could give. Right.
And Buddy Boeheim is giving big returns. Jake was like, take the over on his three-pointers, and it was like the easiest bedball team.
Speaker 1 Is his real name Buddy?
Speaker 4 I believe so. I love that.
Speaker 1
That's weird. And his brother is Jimmy.
You know what? He plays at Cornell. Jimmy and Buddy.
Oh, sorry, Jimmy.
Speaker 1
That's the suck. What do you mean, what? They have the Beheim Bowl every year.
Not this year's. Buddy Boeheim just took his dad to the Sweet 16.
Speaker 4 Buddy Boeheim.
Speaker 1 And Jimmy's season got canceled.
Speaker 1
I'm going to go ahead and get a little bit of a drive. Getting an Agile Education.
Yeah, you're right. That's really going to do great.
Buddy Boeheim can fucking.
Speaker 1
Oh, look at that. The Buddy Bowl.
I love it.
Speaker 4 Wait, so how does that work, though? Like, in terms of...
Speaker 4 I think when Jim was raising both these kids, did he have to stop feeding Buddy so he could recruit him? Yeah. Or do we have to think so?
Speaker 1
Buddy Boeheim, like naming your son Buddy is essentially saying, I want a friend. I have no friends.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 my only friend in life is Coach K.
Speaker 4
Yeah. Yeah.
They got Broden Buddy out there this weekend. It's Coach K and then and then Mike Wilbon for like two weeks a year.
Buddy.
Speaker 1
Oh my god. Syracuse fucking grads are so annoying.
What? We don't give them enough credit.
Speaker 1 We always go after Northwestern grads, but Syracuse blue checks are the worst.
Speaker 4 And there was a Big J fight on the streets last night. I think it was Frank Casolo was saying, well, Jake, you remember it probably verbatim
Speaker 4 when he was saying about like...
Speaker 1 He's like, when Northwestern not in the tournament,
Speaker 1
Maryland now has the best journalism school left. Yeah.
Oh,
Speaker 1 fighting words.
Speaker 4 And at the time, I don't think that Mizzou had been eliminated either.
Speaker 1
It was after Mizzou. It was right after Mizzou.
Okay, that makes sense.
Speaker 4 Speaking of. Well, you know, he called,
Speaker 4 this is the real shot that he took. He called Syracuse journalists celebrity broadcasters.
Speaker 1 Oh, that's true.
Speaker 4 He put a dot above your J.
Speaker 1
Yeah, they are Glory Boys. That's true.
Yeah. I also see someone tweeted at us, September 13, 2017, 247 sports.
Coach visit. Jim Bayheim from Syracuse visits Buddy Behind.
Speaker 1 That's great.
Speaker 1 Speaking of, we missed the greatest gambling trend of all time this weekend. Are you ready for it?
Speaker 1 I'm actually very upset at ourselves.
Speaker 4 How many times will they play? Thank God I'm a country boy.
Speaker 1
It's no, this is a system that we somehow escaped us, and I'm beating myself up about it. So, QS beat West Virginia.
Shout out Bob Huggins. Legend of the game gets his 900th win on Friday night.
Speaker 1 Love Huggy Bear. Sucked that they lost.
Speaker 1 But Pat Forty said,
Speaker 1 I can't even say this to a straight face. I saw this.
Speaker 1 Not saying this is a causal relationship, but the three coaches who seemed the least interested in wearing their masks this season were Brad Underwood, Bob Huggins, and Chris Beard. Gone, gone, gone.
Speaker 1 So if you don't wear your mask, your team will lose in the tournament.
Speaker 4 Jesus Christ.
Speaker 1 How is that guy's brain like real? Even, even if you are tracks that, yeah, even if you're
Speaker 4 the most cautious person in the world when it comes to masks, like Jake is extremely cautious about this.
Speaker 1 Yes.
Speaker 4 To make the leap that, like, wow, was he saying that this is like a judgment that's been cast upon them by karma?
Speaker 1
Or was he saying that theory should have won more on Madness than you should have won your Bitcoin? Exactly. Yes.
It also is very, like, yeah, is there an analytics department?
Speaker 1 Was Pat Forty just watching every game being like, well,
Speaker 1 I've tracked it, and Bob Huggins didn't have his mask around his nose for a total of 18 minutes and 23 seconds of game time.
Speaker 4
Uh-huh. Well, I mean, Nate Oates is a guy that he was criticized this year for being like lax with his mask policies.
And last I checked, Alabama's doing pretty good. Yeah.
Speaker 1 The other one we had was, it's hard to know. This is from Dan Woken.
Speaker 1 It's hard to know if there's a connection, but Roger Ayers, the ref who tested positive for COVID on Monday, officiated the A-10 title game Sunday between VCU and St. Bonaventure.
Speaker 1 He also worked at Georgia Tech, Miami on Thursday. It's hard to know if there's a connection, but here's my connection that I'm making.
Speaker 4 No, it's great whenever
Speaker 4 you start a takeout with it's hard to know a connection, then you make the connection. At that point, you're arguing against yourself already.
Speaker 1 These guys are just waking up being like, okay, how can I figure out a way to
Speaker 1 weave COVID into my takes at all times today?
Speaker 4 Well, I think it's one of these things where a lot of sports journalists like to,
Speaker 4 at some point, they realize that they do not like sports enough to just enjoy sports. And so they have to branch out to something bigger.
Speaker 4 They find something bigger that's more meaningful, whether that's like politics or health or whatever expertise that they try to moonlight as. But it's okay to just
Speaker 4 like the NCAA tournament and enjoy watching basketball.
Speaker 1 Have a good time.
Speaker 4 That's okay to do too.
Speaker 1 Just hang out and watch some basketball.
Speaker 4 Yeah, give your brain a break.
Speaker 1
The other, the last game in this bracket, Rutgers, Houston. Rutgers loses a devastating game.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 PFT and Jake lost a Bitcoin. No, that was just PFT.
Speaker 4 It's me and Brandon. Oh, you and Brandon? But I was going to donate my
Speaker 4 shares of the school.
Speaker 1 Yeah, the Bars Street one lost thousands of thousands of dollars from this podcast that we would have to do.
Speaker 4 Well, small businesses lost. Right, small businesses.
Speaker 1
So I guess the only spin zone for Rutgers is like, you feel something. You feel something.
You won a game. You won a game.
Speaker 4
You won a game of the tournament. We're not taking that away from you.
The game against Clemson was electric. They played their guts out against Houston.
Speaker 4 I hate to use the term, was the moment too big? At the end of the game, the moment might have seemed too big for Rutgers.
Speaker 1 And Houston...
Speaker 4
I actually don't hate using that. I love using that term.
After I said it, I was like, fuck yeah, that sounded like I knew what I was talking about.
Speaker 1
Dude, Houston has to be the... like blandest, least likable team that's good at basketball.
Like who likes to do that? The defense. Who likes Houston? Kelvin Samson's a jerk.
Like who likes that?
Speaker 1
Is he a jerk? Well, I mean, hasn't he got like a million infractions? Oh, no. Oh, no.
I mean, what is that? He's got
Speaker 1 a lot of money.
Speaker 4 Calvin Samson has his trim violations. He's a jerk.
Speaker 1 No, I think he did.
Speaker 1
I want to say. You know what I mean? I think he was a Bruce Pro who.
Indiana for two years in Oklahoma. What did he do?
Speaker 4
I think he left some recruits in limbo. So I think actually.
Jerk.
Speaker 4
Slum Dog Millionaire moment. I think he had recruited Scotty Reynolds, Villanova superstar, to go to Oklahoma and then just like walked out.
I might be getting the two. Eric Gordon.
Speaker 4 But he like recruited people, got their commitments, and then just abandoned them.
Speaker 1 He's had a bunch of
Speaker 1
either way, whatever. I don't like them.
And I don't like Houston. Sorry, Houston.
Like,
Speaker 1 who's even a fan of Houston?
Speaker 4 I do like their hand signal.
Speaker 1 So, you're right.
Speaker 4
This is how unlikable Houston is. Their hand sign is the shocker.
Yeah. It's the two fingers in one.
And they're called the Cougars. And we don't even care enough to make sex jokes about them.
Right.
Speaker 1 And Houston is essentially the bad guy villain foe for the team that you're rooting for in the Disney movie. Yeah.
Speaker 1 There's a Houston Cougars, and they have no real personality.
Speaker 1 They're always good, but never really good.
Speaker 4 Except in football where Dana is doing a tremendous job.
Speaker 1 Obviously, I totally forgot about that. But yes, we love Dana Holgerson, and that football team is incredible.
Speaker 1 Fuck, I love Houston.
Speaker 1 I legitimately love Houston.
Speaker 4 Yeah, no, football-wise, their stadium's awesome. That's where PFT tried out.
Speaker 4 I went four for six and six.
Speaker 1 I was like, I went to die. Hank, would have been nice if you threw in the fact that Dana was at Houston when I started this year.
Speaker 6 Well, no, but everything you just said, if they start winning, then they'll be the bad boys, the big bad powerhouse.
Speaker 1 But aren't they like the villain?
Speaker 1
Aren't they the team that they're always there? And they're good. I'm not saying they're not good.
They are a good team. But Rutgers was this plucky underdog.
Speaker 1
They haven't been in the tournament in like 40 years. They're fucking winning.
And then Houston's like, nope, we're just going to take this.
Speaker 4 Yeah, so if I'm Houston, you've got to realize that you have an image problem.
Speaker 4 And the best way to solve an image problem is generally through nostalgia and the best way they can do that is just label their team five slam a jamma yes and just focus on dunking for a year yeah that's all it takes like we still call gulf coast dunk city right yes that's still their nickname and they might not have anyone who can actually touch rim anymore you're actually if they just focus on dunking for one year call themselves five slam a jama two like the return of the dunk then from that point on it's like oh yeah houston they dunk a lot and people will love them.
Speaker 1
Yes, you're actually, yeah, we need to do a throwback because you're right. Hakeem Elijah is a beloved, like, everyone loves Hakeem Elijah.
That guy was incredible.
Speaker 1
Clyde Drexler, like the whole thing. You're right.
So go back to that. Like, NC State has been living off their title forever.
Yeah. Do that.
Jim Bilvano. Right.
Just do that. Fuckers Legend.
Speaker 4 Chicago Bears have been living off.
Speaker 1 Like, there's, you can just say, if our image right now isn't so great, just every like month and a half, have
Speaker 1 Jim Belushi do a documentary about your team.
Speaker 4
Also, Big Js love to drop the Houston. We have a problem whenever they lose.
That's true. That's going to be a tough one to shake.
Speaker 1
I just don't know. There's something about Houston where I just watch them.
I'm like, these guys,
Speaker 1 because I think it's really the fact that they just don't play.
Speaker 1 The OAC is a tough conference. It's a tough conference and they don't
Speaker 1 play. They just beat the shit out of everyone, but you never know if they're really for real.
Speaker 1
They play good defense and their games are ugly. I don't know.
It's just something about Houston.
Speaker 4 I think it's the fact that it's a big state school. It's in the fourth biggest city in the United States, but we don't look at it the same way that we look at other big state schools.
Speaker 4
Like I look at the University of Wisconsin. I'm like, that's a state school.
Houston is, you know, they're not even little brother in Texas when you think of, like, they're a huge campus.
Speaker 4 They've got like, I don't know, 50,000 people that go to school there. But when I think of Texas.
Speaker 4 Excuse me, that's
Speaker 4
all the acid creeping up on me. I didn't tell you before the show.
I think of like University of Texas. I think of A ⁇ M.
I think of Baylor before I think of Houston. Yes.
Speaker 4 Even though they're not even a state school, like Houston has not done a good job representing themselves as being like, we're Texas. Yes.
Speaker 1
No, you're right. You're absolutely right.
And I'm looking at their, yeah, because I'm looking at their recent tournament history. This is exactly why.
The last three years, they've gone.
Speaker 1
They were at second round, lost to Michigan. I remember that game.
They lost by one point. They almost won with the buzzer beater.
Speaker 4 That was a Houston We Have a Problem game.
Speaker 1 Yeah, they went to the Sweet 16, lost to Kentucky, and now they're in the Sweet 16 again. So I always respect them as a good team.
Speaker 1 But, yeah, I guess they have to go to the Final Ford for me to be like, you know what? I don't hate Houston. More just like a, they just snatch other teams' dreams.
Speaker 4
I don't hate them. I just wish that they weren't as boring.
And I mean, the fact is they're just a football school down there. Dana is just the priorities.
Speaker 1 If Oregon State holds on here, it's an 8, a 12, a 10 in the way of Houston or the volume. Holy shit.
Speaker 4 Did they even talk about Houston joining the Big 12? Was that ever even a part of the convo back in 2012 or whenever it was?
Speaker 1 I'm not sure.
Speaker 4
So that's a big misstep right there. At least get your name in the discussion for it.
Yeah.
Speaker 1
All right. PFT.
Yeah. We had a few cores late this weekend, didn't we?
Speaker 4 The mountains were very blue.
Speaker 1 We did.
Speaker 1 Oh, shit. Here was the mountain.
Speaker 1 Here call you in 10 seconds.
Speaker 1 Okay.
Speaker 4 Hang on, you went money line? Or what'd you do?
Speaker 1 I have the over.
Speaker 6 I have a lot. I need the over.
Speaker 1 Okay.
Speaker 4 I've got the spread, so I think I'm probably still good on that.
Speaker 6 I have the over and Oregon State parlayed, Oregon State Money Line, and then I also bet Oklahoma State Money Line when they're down at halftime. So if the over doesn't hit,
Speaker 6 I'm down bad.
Speaker 1 What's up, guys? It's Big Cat here making my Irish entrance with proper number 12 Irish whiskey. How do you make an Irish entrance, you ask?
Speaker 1 It starts with a shot of proper number 12 Irish whiskey because real friends don't let friends Irish exit a party without a story to tell.
Speaker 1
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Speaker 1
We're going to watch the end of this Oklahoma State game as we go to the next side of the bracket. This is fucking crazy, man.
I can't believe it. That was six points in 10 seconds.
Speaker 1 I can't believe we have eight more games tomorrow. I'm just...
Speaker 1 This is...
Speaker 1 I feel so bad if you live, if you're an Oregon fan and your game starts at 9 o'clock on a Monday. Oh, that's tough.
Speaker 1 Although, maybe that's good. And they didn't get to watch their team play.
Speaker 4 Yeah, they didn't get a chance to. Yeah, that's good point, Jake.
Speaker 1
Feel point. Feel free.
One thing I've learned this weekend watching so much basketball with Jake Marsh is I can't watch sports with Jake Marsh.
Speaker 4
Jake is pure. He's a pure guy.
You know what? I actually discovered a different side of Jake this weekend because we were teamed up in the gambling contest. I spent a lot of time with him.
Speaker 4
Jake's not a gambler, but he was this weekend. He becomes a very negative, aggressive person when watching games that he's betting.
Like, he
Speaker 1 dog comes out. Oh, no.
Speaker 4 Jake dog comes out.
Speaker 4
Oh, yeah. Yes, you do.
Like,
Speaker 4
anytime something is like 50-50, Jake's like, we're fucked. It's over.
Like, he loads his computer. He's like, we're fucked.
We're fucked.
Speaker 1 I like outside.
Speaker 1
There's also, there was 10K on the line. Yeah, no, I, well, we were going to donate some of it.
Okay. Yeah.
Speaker 1
It's 4K. Okay.
Okay. Thousands of dollars.
Speaker 1
Your positivity, which is pure, and I love it. Like, I genuinely love it because it's very rare.
We live in a very narcissistic, or not narcissistic. Yes, that's what they're going to say.
Speaker 1
We are pessimistic. Pessimistic.
There it is. Thank you, Patrick.
Cynical. That's what I was going for.
Cynical and pessimistic society. And Jake is pure and enjoys sports and loves March Madness.
Speaker 1 But when Wisconsin's getting like their Baylor's nuts dragged in their face with alley oops and dunks, and they're down 12, and I hear from the back row, that's all right, Big Cat.
Speaker 1
Just need a little run. I'm just like, shut the fuck up, Jake.
Like, let me die in peace.
Speaker 4
Well, he was also thinking of the spread when he said that to you. He was like, oh, yeah, Big Cat doesn't have plus eight.
He actually wants his team to advance.
Speaker 1
Either way, I love you, Jake. And I can watch sports with you.
I love your love for March Max.
Speaker 4
But it is right. They get to watch their team compete in Oregon.
They didn't get to do that. They played against, or they didn't play against VCU, who, I guess, they advanced.
Speaker 4 VCU advances to play against, what, Ian Book and Jack Cohn in the COVID region of Billy's bracket?
Speaker 1 Yes, yes, yes. All right,
Speaker 1 let's go to that bracket. So
Speaker 1 that will, you know, let's start with that. Oregon advances.
Speaker 1 They're playing Iowa. I'm going to say something nice about Iowa.
Speaker 4 Iowa is fucking good.
Speaker 1 Okay? Iowa fans, they are.
Speaker 1
I'm ready to admit it. They're fucking good.
They are.
Speaker 1 I still don't like Luca Garza, but I think Iowa is going to beat Oregon.
Speaker 4 Is that just because you think that Iowa is Turbo Wisconsin?
Speaker 1 No, it's because we don't got a lot left in the Big Ten, buddy. Yeah.
Speaker 4 Oh, you root for an entire division?
Speaker 1
That's weird. Oh, yeah.
I saw some people tweeting me and being like, I was like, dude, you don't understand the difference between
Speaker 1 college sports and NFL. What is the difference?
Speaker 1 The fact that you get money, like you get, if you get bowl games, you get money.
Speaker 4 Do you personally get money? No, the schools do.
Speaker 1
Okay. The schools get money.
So the success of the conference actually matters for that.
Speaker 1 You get the benefit of the doubt when doing the seeding, when doing March Madness, when doing bowl games, when doing college football playoffs, when that gets money. All that matters.
Speaker 4 So you actually take that seriously.
Speaker 1 No, I hate I.
Speaker 1 And I actually will say, I hate Iowa and I hate Ohio State and I hate all these schools. You won't actually say you hate the Philadelphia Eagles and and the Dallas Cowboys.
Speaker 4 It's funny that we're actually having this conversation because I think that our relationship with the divisions is exactly the same.
Speaker 1 I don't think it's even remotely the same.
Speaker 4 I think it's exactly the same.
Speaker 1 The Dallas Cowboys' success
Speaker 1 doesn't help you at all.
Speaker 4
No, you're right. It doesn't.
It doesn't help me at all.
Speaker 1 Iowa's success does help Wisconsin when it comes to if they get better bowls.
Speaker 4 But you would still rather have them lose.
Speaker 1 No, I would, I'm sick of getting, I'm sick of everyone saying the Big Ten sucks.
Speaker 1 That's exactly me.
Speaker 4 This is not. To a T.
Speaker 1 What?
Speaker 4 With the NFC being one year?
Speaker 1 Yeah, well, it's right. One year.
Speaker 4 I've been saying this for a few years because the best part about the NFC East
Speaker 1 is you get what? Yeah, you get to see it.
Speaker 1 No, here's what happened. You only
Speaker 1 had a huge fans are like... You hated the Giants this year
Speaker 1
under the radar. I kept on saying the Giants were an average team.
You would say, no, they're not.
Speaker 1 And Giants fans came at you and you're like, all right, I'll just start rooting for the entire NFC East.
Speaker 4 No, that's not at all what happened.
Speaker 1 That's what happened.
Speaker 4 No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Speaker 4 Because the best thing that you could say back in the day was like in the early 2000s, mid-2000s, was, yeah, the NFC Beast, we used to beat each other up back in the day.
Speaker 4 We had that run from 1986 through 1995.
Speaker 4 It's all like pointing back to that era, the golden era of the NFC Beast. So it's always like on the horizon of like, this is our resurgence as a division.
Speaker 4 That's what I tap into when I tap into the NFC Beast fandom.
Speaker 1 But you do understand how different it is for college sports when it comes to like everything.
Speaker 4 I know that I do understand conference sports. There's a tangible
Speaker 4 benefit that you get from it, but I still think that you would rather see a Big Ten team lose.
Speaker 1
Iowa's... I see Iowa, like their arrival in football, like Ohio State, I'd rather, I laughed.
I thought that was hilarious. I wasn't like rooting for Ohio State against Oral Roberts.
Speaker 1 I don't give a fuck. I do think that
Speaker 1 it would be nice if the Big Ten could win a national title once in a while so that everyone's like, you suck it.
Speaker 1 You don't, you know, like, they, they then just, it's a trickle-down effect for the entire conference. So I
Speaker 4 will lessen my fraud label on Iowa, but it's only in the interest of potentially getting a retweet from George Kittle at some point.
Speaker 1 I'm just saying this because it will be hilarious if I say all this nice stuff about Iowa, and by the time this podcast comes out, they've lost.
Speaker 1 This is a strategic play on my part.
Speaker 4 So Iowa, they, I mean, it was a 215, so I don't know what you can take away from that. I thought that Luca looked nice.
Speaker 4
He didn't look as sweaty and slippery and like, what's the word I'm looking for with a pale, smooth-skinned, slippery individual who's kind of big and hairy. Yeah.
There's a word out there, a lummics.
Speaker 1
Well, he is a lummick. A galute.
Luca is
Speaker 1 like Luca's size, if we were 300 years ago, he would be the most famous person in this, like, in a
Speaker 1 thousand mile radius of where he was born. Have you heard of Luca? Yeah, have you heard of the man who can throw rocks over his head? Yeah, Willie.
Speaker 4 Yeah, he's 10 feet tall and can shoot
Speaker 4
fireballs out of his arms. He is.
He would be the king of Iowa. Yes, he is.
Yes, he would be Mr. Corn.
Speaker 1 He would.
Speaker 4 I thought that they played
Speaker 4 a perfectly nice brand of basketball.
Speaker 1
No, I'm literally just saying this just so that if they lose, it would be funny and be like, oh, I said something nice about Iowa. All right.
So Oregon's going to play them.
Speaker 1 Gonzaga, they're just really, really good.
Speaker 1 And they're going to probably cakewalk to the Final Four.
Speaker 1
Ohio. Ohio is the story of the tournament.
I hope, I know that Jake will have this on his one-shining moment. But Ohio has Jason Preston, who
Speaker 1 if you've been watching college basketball, you know who he is. They beat Illinois in November, kind of shocked them in Champaign.
Speaker 1 But he is the story of the tournament because he's a former blogger, turned
Speaker 1 college basketball player, turned possible NBA player. And his story is awesome because he went from high school, averaged two points a game.
Speaker 4 Skip A-list.
Speaker 1 Went to UCF, grew four inches as a freshman, went back to like a prep school.
Speaker 4
He went back to high school. Yes.
Like, never been kissed? Yes.
Speaker 1 Was awesome there.
Speaker 4 Never been recruited. This is a fucking teen movie.
Speaker 1 Made a mixtape for himself that Bo Ryan's son Will, who is on the Ohio coaching staff, saw. They recruited him, and now he just upset Virginia, the reigning national champs, and he's got awesome hair.
Speaker 1 He's really good at basketball.
Speaker 1
He used to be a Pistons blogger. He's the story of the tournament.
He's the one that, if Ohio can win tomorrow against Creighton, there will be so many stories written about him.
Speaker 4 That's my guy now. Yes.
Speaker 1 Jason Press. He's awesome.
Speaker 4 So I hadn't heard all these stories about him.
Speaker 4 The most impressive thing that you said right there to me was the fact that he was was a pistons blogger yes so like a pistons blogger in high school for like the last five years you didn't really have that much to write about the fact that you were dedicated to writing about those pistons tells me that you are open invite i want to hire this guy and if you if you don't make it to the nba yes i want to hire him but just as a pistons blogger and he's got also the sentimental he was very so he's from orlando his mom was a big pistons fan they bonded over it his mom tragically passed away, I think, from cancer when he was 16.
Speaker 1 So I'm telling you, if they make it to the next, it's Street 16, Jim Nance is going to
Speaker 1 just
Speaker 1 be
Speaker 1 openly sobbing with the story that he's going to be telling about this kid on our screen. He is going to be a darling of March that the whole world talks about.
Speaker 4 What year is he? He's a junior. So not eligible for the tie.
Speaker 1 Not eligible for the tie.
Speaker 4
He's a blogger. So he probably wouldn't accept the tie in.
Right. Not part of the outfit.
Speaker 1
Well, they'd have to win the national title for now. He'll have Gonzaga if they win tomorrow.
Well, you're saying Gonzaga's good? A little bit.
Speaker 4 I am now rooting for Ohio.
Speaker 1
He's awesome. He's an awesome player.
Ohio was just better than. I mean, Virginia was up for a while, but they went to their classic Virginia.
We're just not going to score for forever.
Speaker 1
By the way, Oregon State has won. Oregon State's the hottest team in the country.
Let's go. They're incredible.
The Beavers. Shout out to Beavers.
Speaker 4 Beavers. An 8, a 12, an 11, and a 2.
Speaker 1 Wait,
Speaker 1 wow. Wow.
Speaker 4 Just looking real quick here. What are.
Speaker 4 we? We'd have to get to the Final Four to get a Beaver Oral matchup.
Speaker 1
Yes. Okay.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 It's a long way away.
Speaker 1
It's a long way away. But either way, yeah, Jason Presson tomorrow.
And also, they call him
Speaker 1
Poor Man's Lamello because he's got the same hair. Okay.
But Lamello got hurt, so maybe he's a rich man's Lamello. Lamello's out for the rest of the season.
Speaker 4 Lamello is rich, so like 99.999% of people could be a poor man's Lamello.
Speaker 1 True, true.
Speaker 1 So yeah, he is the guy that everyone should root for. He's the guy that's going to get talked about.
Speaker 1 The guys that almost became the darlings of March Madness were the Groves Brothers from Eastern Washington that had Kansas on the ropes in the first half. One of them looks like a lumberjack.
Speaker 1 The other looks like Bob Dylan.
Speaker 4
No, they were straight up. It was Super Bad.
Yeah.
Speaker 4
It was the cover of Super Bad. If it was about if Teen Wolf meets Super Bad, that's what you get with the Groves Brothers.
I was rooting hard for him. I always like a good brothers team.
Speaker 1 Yes.
Speaker 4 And you get lots of brothers teams in March Madness.
Speaker 1
It also, like, I know that they're just brothers, but you got to just go by twins. Yeah.
Like, it's way better to be the Grove twins than the Groves brothers.
Speaker 4 I was disappointed when I heard that they were.
Speaker 1 I actually, I assumed they were twins. Yeah, just say you're twins.
Speaker 4
And then when they're like, no, they're just brothers. Even if they're like, you know, just lie and say Irish twins.
They probably are Irish twins, like born, what, eight months apart?
Speaker 1 Yeah. And like, it's like the,
Speaker 1
it's the, the Martin brothers in Nevada, shout out Musk Bus. They were actually twins, but that just made them that much better.
Caleb and Cody Martin.
Speaker 4 Like Morris twins.
Speaker 1 yeah they you just got to be twins I just like the idea Arnold Schwarzenegger and Jenny DeVito
Speaker 4 yeah I like the idea of twins like changing out if one twin sucks and then uh or one twin gets in foul trouble the good twin does and then they just switch jerseys at halftime real quick yeah and then they come out it's like wow The bad twin got good all of a sudden.
Speaker 4 We're going to bench this guy for the rest of the game.
Speaker 1
Buddy and Jimmy. Yeah.
Jayheim. The twins.
But yeah, they were the...
Speaker 1 You need to win a game to be a true March Madness story, and they were that close.
Speaker 4 Yeah, well,
Speaker 4 they are definitely going to be in Jake's list of more Chinese players.
Speaker 1 Our guy, Rico Bosco, said that he watched Bill Self
Speaker 1 do a B-line to Tanner Groves, the better of the twins,
Speaker 1
who I think is a senior at Eastern Washington, potential grad transfer to Kansas next year. So that would be incredible.
And he was a big guy, hairy big guy, who could shoot the three.
Speaker 1 Like, there are certain
Speaker 1
March guys. Jason Preston is one of them.
Like, they're just March Madness stories that you just love, and you just see them on the screen. You're like, oh, that's a March Madness story.
Speaker 4
Yeah, I miss those guys. I miss all the storylines, all the weird shit that comes out.
This guy, you know what they should do?
Speaker 4 There should be a tournament every year for teams that are eliminated where you take the best guys from all the teams that just got bounced and you let them play in one final game, like an all-star game.
Speaker 1
Yeah, they do have a 3v3 at the Final Four. They can start winning money for the seasonality.
The Mark Titans. Yeah.
Yeah.
Speaker 4 Okay, I like that. So they would, both, the twins would definitely be on my list.
Speaker 4 Who else would be? There was one other big
Speaker 4 one.
Speaker 1 Well, Cameron Krutwig, obviously.
Speaker 4 Yeah, but he's still around. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 Yeah.
Speaker 1 I don't know.
Speaker 4 We'll update the list as we go. Okay.
Speaker 1 Give me another name.
Speaker 4 Another name that would be on there. Who got bounced? Who got bounced?
Speaker 1 UCSB had some guys. The Gouchos are just cool.
Speaker 1 They're just a cool name.
Speaker 1
Yeah. They have J-Rock McLaughlin.
And Grand Canyon, the antelope. J-Rock? J-Rock.
Speaker 4
There was a guy in Cleveland State, I think, that cried a lot. A lot, a lot.
Just kids. Yeah, just kids.
Speaker 4 If you're the biggest crier, the one who's the most upset after a loss, I want that guy to get another shot. I don't want that to be the last time he sees a basketball court.
Speaker 1 I remember that because there was also a guy in Texas Southern who was crying a lot, a lot. And again, they're just kids, so I'm not going to say anything bad, but they're just kids.
Speaker 1 But if you're a 16-seed, did you really think you're going to win?
Speaker 4 Yeah, but you see in their face and in their emotions, like the realization that this might be the last time
Speaker 4 I put on this shirt.
Speaker 1
Well, no, no, because it's the COVID year. That's true.
So they can all keep playing. Yeah.
Speaker 4
But I think the biggest cryer should get a spot. Yes.
It should be a crier spot. Yes.
Speaker 1 All right. Before we get to the last part of the brackets,
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Speaker 4
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Speaker 4 You think that if you just like, if you were trying to last longer and you just went through your head of trying to name every single team
Speaker 4 in the round of 64 in order in the bracket, I feel like that might work too.
Speaker 1 Or Cameron Krutwig's post-moves.
Speaker 4 Yeah, or it's just Sister Jean.
Speaker 1 Yeah.
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Speaker 1
All right. Oregon State advances hottest team in the world.
What a fucking tournament. What can we
Speaker 1 because I, so I got fucked by Oregon State like last Friday in the Pac-12 tournament. And this is, it's a dangerous thing because you can go spite or you can be like, hey, you know what?
Speaker 1
Let's just roll with them. Thank God.
I thankfully have gone, let's just roll with them. And I've been on them last three games, and it's been awesome.
Speaker 4 If you can't beat them, join them.
Speaker 1 Yeah, you have to make that decision very quickly. Like,
Speaker 1 are you going to have some fun and just fucking roll with it? Or are you going to be like, fuck them, I'm going to keep fading them till they lose?
Speaker 4
You know what? I was just thinking one other kind of bonus about this March Madness. And don't get me wrong, I don't like the setup.
I like Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday for the first round.
Speaker 4
My body is all screwed up. Monday is going to suck for you.
If you have like a nine-to-five job, it's going to be awful. It's going to be bad for me, too, because I'm going to be flying.
Speaker 4 But this whole weekend with the game on monday it's like daylight savings time took on an entire day right it like pushed my entire week back 24 hours right and we still like i still watched all the thursday games so it felt like thursday like thursday had
Speaker 1 seven or eight hours of basketball running a 16 seed great
Speaker 4 great job by uh the ncaa scheduling two blue bloods playing that that actually made everybody want to watch all the games on thursday night uh because having ucla and Michigan State go up against each other, it was like, that's, it felt like a tournament game at that point.
Speaker 4 So it felt like a tournament day. My prediction is the NCAA is going to think about doing something similar to that next year.
Speaker 4 I don't know if it's going to be like the entire schedule is thrown off again, but they'll definitely have like the two biggest names that are potentially.
Speaker 4 They might even, there might be some monkey business when it comes to the last four in where they don't invite teams like smaller alumni bases.
Speaker 4 They just get two bona fide like giant state schools to square off in that first game for ratings.
Speaker 1 Right, right.
Speaker 1 So, and also shout out Tom Izzo for getting angry.
Speaker 4 Tom Izzo, listen, Tom Izzo, I'm just gonna
Speaker 4 put all of my curry ball complaints on Tom Izzo.
Speaker 1 I'm gonna call it Izzo ball.
Speaker 4 The end of that game was case in point.
Speaker 4 Players don't drive to the bucket anymore in the last 10 seconds of the game.
Speaker 1 Well,
Speaker 1 that's a perfect segue to Abilene Christian in the East driving to the bucket, getting a completely fucked up phantom call that was not a foul, but that's the point that if you go to the bucket, sometimes things can happen.
Speaker 1 That game was, to say it was a rock fight is like a just, is
Speaker 1 actually
Speaker 1 really offensive to rock fights because there was a moment where it's the end of Saturday night and Texas has 23 turnovers and the,
Speaker 1 like,
Speaker 1 they had to stop, the refs had to stop the game for like the fourth time in three minutes because someone was gushing blood and you're like what is going on here and abilene christian's coach has a fucking uh clear herpie on alleged yes herpie cold sore where like double lipper it was on top and bottom literally this is the greatest year to have a herpie outbreak during the tournament just keep your goddamn mask on that's what i'm saying pat 40 should have tweeted about that guy instead of everybody else i couldn't believe it that guy hates wearing masks so much that he won't even cover up a herp like double herp and
Speaker 4 he also looked a lot like will musk champ by the way, which was pretty funny to see him, like getting sweaty and screaming at Texas because it might have just been Will Muschamp. Yes, we don't know.
Speaker 4 But at the end of that game, there was a I think they had to take a double timeout towards the end because
Speaker 4
there's too much blood. The floor was bleeding.
Yes. Like it was like you were watching the game in a haunted house that you were staying at and like house sitting for a weekend.
Speaker 4
The floor was just, it was oozing blood up from the ground. It was a crazy end of the game.
They took the ball to the hole. A guy who was a, what, 56% foul shooter goes to the line,
Speaker 4 makes both of them. That, I mean, that's the most clutch foul shots that I've seen in a long time.
Speaker 1 Incredible.
Speaker 1 The game was just, it was terrible, but great, and it was march in every, like, when people say, how can you watch college basketball? It's not like even close to the NBA product, like, no, duh.
Speaker 1 The NBA is incredible. The shot, we had, we had our guy, Blake Griffin, who dunks, no big deal, up in one corner watching the Nets game.
Speaker 1 And if you just glanced up there and you saw like any open shot just be a perfect Swiss, you're like, whoa, what sport is that? That's not what we're watching. Where it's just bricks, bricks, bricks.
Speaker 1 But it's the drama and it's the fact that this game sucked, but it was incredible.
Speaker 1
But shout out to that coach. So, Joe Golding.
I saw this tweet from Chris Vanini. He said, so Abilene Christian joined Division I basketball in 2014.
Speaker 1 Since then, their Ken Palm rankings: 348, 342, 317, 298, 262, 152, 184, now 80. So it's literally, you can watch him build this program until this point where they beat an in-state team, Shaka Smart.
Speaker 1 This was like the resurgence year for Shaka Smart, who saved his job. You have to shave your head again, dude.
Speaker 1 The fact that you shaved your head and you had that hair is still, like, bald people everywhere hate Shaka Smart.
Speaker 4
It's jarring looking at it. Yes.
It's very strange. I mean, the nice thing,
Speaker 4
I always compare him to Bill Solft, or not Bill Soft, Rick Barnes. And Shaka Smart's performance, at least, wasn't as bad as the University of Tennessee's.
So I still think I'm going to chalk this.
Speaker 4 This year goes to Shaka Smart. Yes.
Speaker 1 It was
Speaker 1 Texas. I mean, turning the ball over 23 times is impressive.
Speaker 1 That's impressive. Like,
Speaker 1 that's really, really hard to do.
Speaker 4 And then the Horns Down at the end.
Speaker 1 Oh.
Speaker 4 Can't have the Horns down. I love the Horns Down.
Speaker 1 Texas is back.
Speaker 1 All right.
Speaker 1
Other parts of this bracket. Turns out what I said last week about everyone talking about how the Georgetown was incredible in Patrick Ewing and the Big East tournament.
Turns out maybe not so much.
Speaker 1 So Colorado just torched them.
Speaker 1
Then Hank got in my own head and just walked around saying you got to respect the Big East. And I asked him to name the teams of the Big East.
He got six. Seven.
Six. He's like, one and a half.
Speaker 4 Louisville, Syracuse.
Speaker 1 He's South Florida. Yeah.
Speaker 4 So
Speaker 1 he got in my head.
Speaker 4 I don't want to say I told you so about Georgetown, but I told you exactly so when we interviewed Stanford Steve. Yeah, no.
Speaker 4
This is it to a T. And I feel bad rooting against Georgetown because I like Georgetown.
I want to root for Georgetown.
Speaker 4
I want to be like, this is the return of old school, punch you in the face, no blood, no foul basketball. I want to root for him.
I like Patrick Ewing. I think he's a nice guy.
Speaker 4 I think he's obviously like a living legend. He's probably doing good stuff at Georgetown.
Speaker 4 But it was just, it was all the warning signs were blinking bright red saying this is not not the team that you want to bet on.
Speaker 1 I said it on Sunday night. Like they beat,
Speaker 1 it's great they won the Big East, but the Big East was not the Big East this year with some of the problems. Nova getting all the injuries, the P-bomb from Doug McDermott.
Speaker 1 Like the other team, Marquette wasn't good. Seton Hall was a disappointment.
Speaker 1
LSU, St. Bonner Ventures was another, that was the Winthrop effect where everyone was like, St.
Bonnie's, they're good, they're awesome.
Speaker 1 They were never...
Speaker 4
It's a fun one to abbreviate. So a lot of people like to talk about the mid-majors that they can toss like a little, I know a fun fact about them.
You can call them the Bonnies.
Speaker 4 And LSU was just, it was dominant.
Speaker 1
It was, yeah, so I felt like a fool for that one. Will Wade, maybe.
Yeah, Michigan LSU is going to be a great game. And then the bottom of the bracket,
Speaker 1
shout out Maryland. Never really close with UConn.
Well, UConn was in my Final Four.
Speaker 1 Whoops.
Speaker 1 Oh, I had, you see, the best was.
Speaker 1 I love when people try to dunk on us for our opinions, not realizing, dude, we, one, we give opinions basically constantly. Yeah, two, also,
Speaker 4 you're probably smarter than us. Yeah, you're hearing my voice right now.
Speaker 1
Yeah, we're idiots. Three, we're 95% of the time joking.
And four, we're like, C2, we're idiots. So there was a treat.
I don't know if it was the Maryland account. Except for Jake.
Speaker 1
Yeah, except for Jake. It was the Maryland account and Billy.
The Maryland account. I don't think it was the Maryland account, but it was someone made a list of everyone who picked UConn, and it said
Speaker 1
sports media experts. And I was at the top of the list.
I'm like, I'm an expert. You did me for Creighton, too, because I wanted UC Santa Barbara.
We're experts? I guess. I am not.
Speaker 1 Listen, if I were an expert, I'd have a lot more money in my gambling account right now.
Speaker 4 Yeah, so we are not experts, despite how, I guess, impressive we might sound and knowledgeable we might sound.
Speaker 4 We're absolutely not that.
Speaker 4 I think that Maryland, it's either an iron sharpens iron situation or Maryland recruited UMBC's social media person because Maryland's Twitter account, it's been pretty good recently. Yeah, no doubt.
Speaker 4 Like they've been tweeting the Where's Duke stuff.
Speaker 4
They put up a fire meme where it was the tortoise as the stonk guy and said torps on it. That made me laugh.
That is funny.
Speaker 4 This is stuff that the University of Maryland would not have done were it not for the UMBC upset of UVA a couple years ago, where their neighbor absolutely posterized all of Twitter for a solid three hours.
Speaker 1
Right, right, exactly. Um, it's Maryland, shout out, Maryland.
I don't want to be on the bad side of Maryland, I don't want Scott Van Belt to just hate us because he's very passionate.
Speaker 4 What time's their game tomorrow?
Speaker 1 Uh, what time is their game, Jake? Standby. It's not early because
Speaker 4 Iowa's first.
Speaker 1 Yeah, they're playing Alabama.
Speaker 4 So pick out, make sure to FaceTime Stanford Steve tomorrow during the during the game.
Speaker 1
So they are 7:45 Central, 7:45 East Central. Okay, so they're playing Alabama tomorrow.
Alabama beat Iona.
Speaker 1 Yep. Rick Petino.
Speaker 4 Rick Petino got bounced.
Speaker 1 Do you want me to read the text message I got?
Speaker 4 I'm not going to make a 15-second joke. Do you want me to read the text messages I got after the game for my stalker?
Speaker 1 Dan Katz,
Speaker 1
I am a close to Coach Rick Patino and even closer to Richard Petino. We understand you have shown a level of respect for Coach Rick, and that is appreciated.
I have.
Speaker 1
I've shown shown a great level of respect for Coach Rick Petino. I think he did a great job with Iona this year.
He's a legend of the game Hall of Famer this year.
Speaker 1
52-day layoff when they made the 52-day layoff. Unbelievable story.
So he said,
Speaker 1 let me just go back because I just threw in a lot of stuff. We understand you have shown a level of respect for Coach Rick, and that is appreciated.
Speaker 1 We also know your piece of shit sidekick is still defaming coach. Iona was a great success, and we will show your sidekicks and manners one way or another.
Speaker 4
I'll take the one way. I don't want the other.
Whatever the other way is, doesn't sound like it's for me.
Speaker 1 And I just wrote back and I said, here's his address.
Speaker 4 Oh, thank you. I appreciate it.
Speaker 1 So, all right.
Speaker 4 I respect what Rick Petino has done.
Speaker 1 I absolutely do. I've transferred my stalker to you.
Speaker 4
Listen, I've always respected Coach Petino. He's a Hall of Famer PFT.
The championship that they won at Louisville should count. The banner should be up.
I've always said that.
Speaker 4 I think he's a great coach. What he did over in Greece was wonderful.
Speaker 4 Just like the ability to go over there and transform a foreign program like that in a country that you don't have any experience in,
Speaker 4
he's a legend. It's the stuff legends are made of.
And then he comes back here, takes Iona, guides them through a COVID year where they, I mean, you talk about adversity and a tumultuous season.
Speaker 4 Iona probably had it worse than anybody. And they needed the steady, guiding, slippery hand of Rick Petino to guide them through this COVID year and put them into this matchup.
Speaker 4
And it's unfortunate that they got bounced in the first round. But I think I like what he's doing at the program, Big Cat.
And it'll be interesting to see how long he lasts at Coach River.
Speaker 1 Okay, so
Speaker 1 I'm serious. No, it's fine.
Speaker 4 Do you think that he's going to go to... No, it's fine.
Speaker 1
It's on you now. It's on me.
It's on you. It's on you.
I've shown respect for Coach Rick.
Speaker 4 I said a lot of nice things about Coach Rick. Sure.
Speaker 1 Sure you did.
Speaker 1 You said a lot of nice things.
Speaker 4 It actually wasn't me that said all those things in the past.
Speaker 4 It was Billy.
Speaker 1 Billy. It was Billy.
Speaker 4 It was Billy.
Speaker 1 You should actually frame Billy.
Speaker 4 Yeah, Billy said all those things that you think that I said.
Speaker 1 Let's see.
Speaker 4 This is a little joke that we had for a while.
Speaker 1
Let's see how drunk Billy is right now. Billy texted us.
It's almost one in the morning back home.
Speaker 4 Oh, I'm sorry. Should I not call Billy? No,
Speaker 4 he's probably studying after that.
Speaker 1 He texted us at four o'clock this afternoon. He's like, hey, do you guys need me to hop on Zoom for the show tonight? Which was translation, hey, can I get fucking drunk as shit and plays Warzone?
Speaker 1
Yes, Billy, you can. Let's see.
Do you think he picks up? No. Nope.
Speaker 1
I think he's going to. I think he's he's going to.
What is he? He's not going to go to sleep at one in the morning.
Speaker 6 If he's smart, he wouldn't pick up.
Speaker 1 I wouldn't pick up. It's 12.30.
Speaker 4
I would not pick up this call. I would say that I went to bed.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 Oh, he
Speaker 4 hit the ignore.
Speaker 4 That was like three rings. No, no, I think he's yugging.
Speaker 1 He's been yog.
Speaker 4 Did you see his tweet earlier today? What did he say? Where he put up a tweet saying, like, should I stay at college, yes or no? And one of them was like, the mountains are blue.
Speaker 1 So,
Speaker 1 yeah,
Speaker 1 he's definitely
Speaker 6
a poll. It said, please help consult.
Option one was drive home and get good sleep. And the second one was, you only get college once with a mountain emoji, the letter R, and then a blue square.
Speaker 4
So, yeah. So, Billy, just some advice in the future.
You don't have to put up a poll. You can just get drunk.
Speaker 6 I actually think he would say that to us. I actually think he was smart.
Speaker 6 I respect all these moves Billy's made because I think if we called him him and be like, no, well, I asked Twitter what I should do, and they told me to stay, so I had to.
Speaker 1 Yeah, it's true. The people decided
Speaker 4
the listener's fault that Billy's drunk tonight. But I'll be serious about Rick Petino.
I think that he's a very good coach, and I think that he's done a good job at Iona. I hope that he stays there.
Speaker 4 I like having Rick Petino on Long Island. I hope he builds into a big program.
Speaker 1
Is it Long Island? I think so. It's West Yesterday.
New Rochelle. West Yes.
New Rochelle. I can't close it to all that stuff.
Close enough.
Speaker 4
But I like what he's done, and I hope he sticks around. And I actually enjoy.
College basketball is a better place when Rick Petino's on the sidelines.
Speaker 1 Yes, agreed.
Speaker 1 All right, let's do...
Speaker 1
Oh, wait. Do you have Hep Cronin in your watch running moments? I do not.
Wow. They could have made it.
Speaker 1
They still have one extra game, but no. Oh, UCLA, Mick Cronin's dad.
They hadn't
Speaker 1
seen each other in like a year. That was a nice moment after that.
And that's a big story. Yeah, I love that.
Speaker 1 And so
Speaker 1 it's so funny where it's like we're watching these kids play and
Speaker 1 You know like half the screen time is just to the coach's dad Hank's just watching like gang fights over here.
Speaker 4 What are you watching?
Speaker 1 Spring break is back
Speaker 1 really
Speaker 1
all right wait. Hold on.
Let's do who's back of the week and then I have my list. I know we'll finish up with your list.
We'll finish with your list.
Speaker 1 But before we get to who's back of the week who's back of the week is
Speaker 1
the cash app. The cash app is back.
The stock market invested through the cash app. Buy and sell Bitcoin on the cash app.
Speaker 1 And of course when you download the cash app and enter the referral code Barstool, you receive $10 for free, $10 for free, and $10
Speaker 1 goes to ASPCA.
Speaker 4 The Cash App is officially back.
Speaker 1
It is totally back. Download the Cash App from the App Store or Google Play Store today.
The Cash App, Cash App, Cash App. Thank you to the Cash App.
Go download it and buy some Bitcoin.
Speaker 1
Hank, why don't you start? So Spring Break is back because you're watching just people kick the shit out of each other. Yeah.
Wait, I want to see this.
Speaker 4 This fight's been going on for like three minutes and it's just as violent as it was when it started.
Speaker 1 Let me see.
Speaker 1 I want to see it. I want to see this fight.
Speaker 4 This looks like a Royal Rumble.
Speaker 1
I love. I love it.
People keep sprinting in. Point out videos too.
Speaker 6
So it's literally from tonight. It's absolutely like absolutely.
My New Year's resolution is stopping.
Speaker 1 Absolutely crazy.
Speaker 4 New Year's resolution.
Speaker 1
Spring. Holy shit.
This is awesome. Yeah.
Is there titties? Oh, yeah.
Speaker 1
I've already seen three tits. Oh, my God.
Dude, you know what always amazes me with these type of videos is like the presence of mind for the cameraman to just get all the action. There it is.
Speaker 1 This really is a royalty. Was there a dog in there?
Speaker 6
The tweet is from at TJ1K. Miami is nuts right now.
Bruh, cry emoji. If you want to go look.
Speaker 1 Oh, more titties. Just got more.
Speaker 4 There were some good St.
Speaker 1
Patrick's Day ones, too. Yeah.
St.
Speaker 4 Patrick's Day 1. There was one where this girl just had her left boob hanging out the entire time in the fight, and then she adjusted it, and one second later, her right boob popped out.
Speaker 1
It happened. You can't counterweight.
You can't script that. That was an incredible fight.
Speaker 1 Oh my God. Someone just ended up fully on naked.
Speaker 1 There was also the video.
Speaker 6 Did you see the Spring Break video? The kid escaping the cop car and everyone just starts running with him.
Speaker 1 Yeah. That was awesome.
Speaker 6
Absolutely amazing. But Spring Break's back.
My other who's back was Kylie Jenner. Everyone's favorite Kardashian was in the news.
Her personal hairstylist had to get brain surgery.
Speaker 6 Needed like $60,000. And Kylie Jenner, the billionaire, was nice enough to post on her story the GoFundMe for her personal hairstylist
Speaker 6 $60,000 surgery, and she herself donated $5K.
Speaker 1
Oh, that's cool. Good for her.
You know what?
Speaker 1 If Rutgers had hit, we would have donated at least $50,000.
Speaker 4 I would have personally matched Kylie Jenner's $5,000.
Speaker 4 And I think that Kylie can probably make the case that the exposure that she gave the GoFundMe via a retweet was probably worth, what, $200,000? Is that kind of the going rate person?
Speaker 4 So really, her hairstylist owes her,
Speaker 4 what would that be, $140,000. So she should expect an invoice for that.
Speaker 6 Yeah, so she's just, you know, she's trending for all the right reasons.
Speaker 1 By the way, the
Speaker 1 schedule
Speaker 1
for next Saturday, you have the Syracuse games at 10 o'clock. That's perfect because that's when they began Zagon 2016.
Oh, okay, there you go.
Speaker 1 But either way,
Speaker 1 the guy, David
Speaker 1
Warlock, he's great. He is great.
His name's Warlock. Follow him year-round.
He said they define an upset as a team seeded five spots or more lower than their opponent.
Speaker 1 This year has already set the record with 11 such occurrences, and we're midway through the second round.
Speaker 4 Jake, I want to back up real quick. You said you follow him year-round.
Speaker 1 Does that imply that there are people that you don't like?
Speaker 4 Oh, I do that with
Speaker 1
him. Seasonally? Yeah.
Yeah, 100%.
Speaker 1 I do that with some people, too.
Speaker 4 So, what's that schedule like?
Speaker 4 I've never heard of that before. It's never occurred to me.
Speaker 1 Tiger Tracker? I don't want to hear Tiger Tracker's opinions on
Speaker 1 world people.
Speaker 4 That's when you get the real shit.
Speaker 1
When people are bored out of season. Yeah.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 No, I unfold.
Speaker 4 I mean, Tiger Tracker is definitely a guy.
Speaker 1
Well, it's actually multiple. But in the middle of seasonal, it's like the something that's not going to be.
I think it's multiple people.
Speaker 4 Shut up. Yeah.
Speaker 4 What are they doing now?
Speaker 1 I don't know. I don't follow him.
Speaker 1 Tigers at home. Tigers in the hospital.
Speaker 4 I think he's at home now. Shout out, Tiger.
Speaker 1 Shout out. Shout out.
Speaker 4 Just big ups, Tiger. Respect.
Speaker 1
We haven't said that in a while, so big ups, Tiger. Hope he's doing okay.
Should have worn red today. Fawlah! Next Sunday, remind me.
Speaker 1 We should do that.
Speaker 1 Every Sunday until we get to the player.
Speaker 1 Every Sunday, we're going to wear red. All right, PFT, who's your who's back?
Speaker 4
My who's back of the week is going to be drugs. Oh, not a drug guy.
Not a drug guy. Well, it's, I mean, come get your man's big cat.
Yeah. Because the Chicago Cubs have a prospect.
Oh, I saw that.
Speaker 4 His name's Jesus.
Speaker 4
Probably Jesus. Jesus Carmago was arrested after police found 21 pounds of meth in his team equipment bag.
And so I guess he's been on the team since 2015. So it's not like a new guy.
Speaker 4 21 pounds of meth is Walter White levels of meth. Like 21 pounds.
Speaker 4 I don't think that my bag, if you check, if you like put your bag on that thing at the airport where they weigh it, I guess it's called a scale.
Speaker 4
I don't think my bag usually. Well, you have a baby bag.
I do that.
Speaker 4
I don't check that one, big cat. That's a tiny bag.
But you know what I'm saying?
Speaker 1 How did you get that bag? Did you sell like wrapping paper door to door and then you got that as a prize?
Speaker 4 That's a funny joke.
Speaker 1 I mean, it's not a joke.
Speaker 4 So
Speaker 4
I had shoulder surgery for my torn labrum. Okay.
When I was playing rugby, I was in the Division 3 state championship. Okay.
When I was in Texas, and I started. They took me out of the game.
Speaker 4 We were winning.
Speaker 4
No, we were winning. We came in second place.
They took me out of the game.
Speaker 4 We were winning.
Speaker 4
Anyways, regardless, I had shoulder surgery. Okay.
And my mom was like, you need a bag that you're going to be traveling a little bit.
Speaker 4 You need a bag that you can put up on the airplane into the overhead compartment while you're cooler. As you're rehabbing from your shoulder surgery when I couldn't lift my arm up.
Speaker 4
And so then that was the bag that I carried. Got it.
Yeah. And I still carry it for some reason.
Speaker 1 It's like when I saw Ken Rosenthal on the plane and he
Speaker 1 to put the bag up, he hopped up on the seat.
Speaker 1 Yeah, dude.
Speaker 1
Like, I don't want to make fun of that, but that was funny. I was like, holy shit.
You got to know.
Speaker 1 Yeah.
Speaker 1 like man i just stow it in the front or check it i just i would just buy clothes when i got there rather than do that not me
Speaker 4 i can straight up dunk i can dunk my suitcase into that overhead he did it so quickly it's clearly something he's good at yeah it was like one motion whoop uh but regardless what i'm saying is like when you fly with a bag and you put on it most bags Don't weigh more than 20 pounds, even if you're traveling like for a weekend.
Speaker 4 That's a significant amount of meth. So I don't know if the Cubs have
Speaker 4 the Chicago Cubs, are they a front for the cartels? Is this something that's an organizational thing? Where he's assigned to do that?
Speaker 1 I wouldn't put it past rickets to make money any which way. Maybe that guy will find a way to make money.
Speaker 4 That's why Theo left.
Speaker 1 Yeah, he found out about it. He will find a way to make money.
Speaker 1 It would not shock me.
Speaker 4
It'd actually be kind of, it'd be good for baseball. Yeah.
If the Chicago Cubs were just straight up like the Juarez cartel.
Speaker 1
Fine by me. Maybe that would get Ricketts.
Yeah, actually, I don't. No, I don't want him out, but yeah, he's whatever.
Speaker 1 Yeah, I fully think
Speaker 1 I was hanging out with some friends before we did the stream today, and we were joking about, because one of my buddies who I have season tickets to the Cubs with, he was joking that Ricketts is going to do,
Speaker 1
like, he's going to open up the stadium 20%. They're going to have one concession stand, then they're going to do surge pricing on that.
It's going to be genius. Yeah.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 It's absolutely going to happen.
Speaker 1
All right. So my who's back is the Big Ten.
I actually have a list. So people have been saying they suck.
They do. But I have a list of teams that are still in the tournament that are in the Big Ten.
Speaker 1 Rutgers covered eight and a half easily. You'd agree? You're wearing a Ruckers hat?
Speaker 4 I do agree with that.
Speaker 1 Michigan, actually still in it. Ohio, because
Speaker 1 Bo Ryan's son recruited Jason Preston and also Mac is Big Ten Jr.
Speaker 4 And I think also that since Ohio State got bounced, Ohio takes their place
Speaker 4 the universal
Speaker 4 of Ohio, yeah.
Speaker 1
Wisconsin, just for their Friday night performance. That's one.
I mean, it's trivia now. Roy Williams is 29 and one in the first round.
Who's their one loss? Wisconsin.
Speaker 1
Maryland, Iowa, Gonzaga, we talked about with Mark Titus, Jalen Suggs, Mr. Basketball from Minnesota.
Loyola's Big Ten Country. That's a no-brainer, right?
Speaker 4
Yeah. I mean, Cameron Krutwig is the Big Ten mascot.
Right, exactly. If you had a mascot for the entire conference, it's him.
Speaker 1 Yes.
Speaker 1 Alabama, because Nate Oates got his,
Speaker 1
I think, graduate degree from Madison. Yeah.
Middle school teacher in Michigan. There you go.
Or
Speaker 1 Romulus.
Speaker 1 Yeah, Arkansas. We come at Jake with these.
Speaker 4 Yeah.
Speaker 1
Arkansas just because we're friends with Eric Musselman. And I think his, yeah, no, that counts.
And I think
Speaker 1 his dad coached
Speaker 1 in Minnesota.
Speaker 4 It's too fun.
Speaker 1 His dad coached in Minnesota. And Oregon State
Speaker 1 wasn't Obama's brother-in-law?
Speaker 1
Oh, yeah. He was the head coach.
He was. At one point.
So that counts. And
Speaker 1
Tinkle's their head coach. It rhymes with Hinkle.
Hinkle's in Indiana. Oh, there we go, Jake.
Speaker 4 You know what Jake?
Speaker 4 Jake has consistently won up your fun facts in this.
Speaker 1 There it is. No screen.
Speaker 4 You know what we should actually do at some point? We should sit down and make mascots for every conference.
Speaker 1 Yeah.
Speaker 4 We should.
Speaker 4 We absolutely need that.
Speaker 4 That's a good off-season.
Speaker 1 By the way, oh, who's back of the week?
Speaker 1 Did you see Joe Biden going up those stairs? Yeah.
Speaker 1 That's all I got. Fucking
Speaker 1 ate it twice.
Speaker 1 You know what?
Speaker 1 You can't do what Joe Biden did, and that is the initial reaction whenever you trip going upstairs is, let me speed my pace up to show everyone how athletic I am.
Speaker 1 And haha, I didn't trip up these stairs. Well, then you just trip up more stairs.
Speaker 4 Yeah, so it's the Gerald Ford at least, he tripped going down the stairs when he was getting off the plane.
Speaker 4 What Joe Biden should have done, when you trip on a staircase or anywhere, if you ever trip, you look down at the ground where you just tripped and you act like there's something that you stepped on.
Speaker 1 And you're like, oh, what was it up?
Speaker 1 You're like,
Speaker 4
what was that? You're like, you scuff it up a little bit with your foot. You try to fix whatever the divot was.
Yep. It was,
Speaker 4 it was not a good performance by Uncle Joe.
Speaker 1
I would just lay there and have them cart me off. That would be one of the things.
Or just go fall down the stairs. Yeah.
And then it's like, hey, I broke my neck. What are you going to say?
Speaker 4 It would be, so
Speaker 4 I'm not rooting for this to happen, but if a president were to like be walking up the stairs into Air Air Force One, trip going up the stairs and then fall over the railing like 30 feet and break,
Speaker 1 it would objectively be very funny.
Speaker 4 No, I just laugh thinking about it.
Speaker 1 Yeah.
Speaker 1
All right, let's wrap up the show with Jake's. This is Jake's predictions for one shining moment.
So I asked him to take a running tally as we watch games all weekend.
Speaker 1 What he thinks will end up in one shining moment.
Speaker 1 This is important because we're going to, like, we will watch one shining moment and we will fact-check against it. Yeah.
Speaker 1 Okay.
Speaker 1 I'll try my best.
Speaker 1
I like this task. Yeah.
Um, this is basically like if you, a young Jake Marsh dreamed of doing something like this. Yeah.
I'm all for it.
Speaker 1
Um, number one, uh, the Virginia Tech tying three to four, so T. That was an unreal way to say the turnout.
Yeah, was that T3? Did they win? I didn't end up mattering, but it was still.
Speaker 4 Yeah, but it's going to be in there.
Speaker 1 I mushed them big time.
Speaker 4
I tweeted out the Florida win beforehand. Yeah, you did.
Almost cost us that entire thing.
Speaker 1
Yeah, you did. Yeah.
I had the under. Also from that game, my who's back was going to be blood because every time there's someone with bloody on the floor, they just show it.
Speaker 1
And they show the blood on the floor. They show the slow-mo.
So Florida's Tyree Appleby had a bloody nose.
Speaker 4 I feel like.
Speaker 6 You're fighting for your life.
Speaker 6 You're a shooting star. Yeah.
Speaker 1
Yeah. Exactly.
Well, fighting for your life, yeah.
Speaker 1 Something from the Oral Roberts upset.
Speaker 4 Yep.
Speaker 1 Something.
Speaker 6 All those years. No one knows.
Speaker 1
I mean, Obenauer and Acemas, they're two sharpshooters. Okay.
It's just them making threes and maybe.
Speaker 4 You know what it should be? They should just cut in. They should really quickly cut in that meme of the what you see versus what she sees for the Oral Roberts game.
Speaker 6 One-shining moment is bigger than memes.
Speaker 1
Please investigate. Hey, please.
It's so literally
Speaker 6 the Jay Marsh is the day a meme enters a one-shining moment is the day I'm out.
Speaker 1 Yes, agree.
Speaker 1 The highlight
Speaker 1
that actually sparked this assignment. Gonzaga had a, someone threw it off the backboard and the other guy dunked it.
I'm like, that's going to make one-shining moment. That's what sparked this.
Speaker 1
That's right. That's right.
So they did that against Norfolk State. Tanner Groves getting taken out for Eastern Washington, crying.
Yep. That'll do it.
Yep.
Speaker 1 Ohio's dagger three against Virginia. Yep.
Speaker 1 Here's what I told PFT.
Speaker 1 This is my long shot. They are going to put a random VCU highlight from the regular season
Speaker 1
to give them their shine. Isn't that great? Or the conference championship, maybe them cutting down the nets.
Yeah. They can't get robbed in a one-shiny moment.
They made the tournament.
Speaker 1 What do you think?
Speaker 4 They have to be included. Jake's absolutely right.
Speaker 1
But they didn't win their tournament, so maybe not. That's fair.
Like, if it was... No, but they don't put just winners in.
No, they don't.
Speaker 1
They're not even if they were at large. Like, I'm saying.
Maybe they'll just put a Dan Woken tweet in.
Speaker 4 I'm telling you, like, they're going to include something. Yeah, okay.
Speaker 4 This is where Jake's big J journalist brain is like, he's got a radar a lot.
Speaker 1 Yes, okay. Yeah.
Speaker 1
Sister Jean crowd shot, that's obvious. Maybe her doing the hand pat.
Yeah. The hand pat.
Yeah. Yeah.
Rutgers' first tournament win win since 1983, so maybe a shot or a dunk or a crowd shot.
Speaker 1
Oh, they deserve credit. They haven't been one of the shit.
Jack Shao, Jackie Preil. Yeah.
Buddy Bayhawk making a three. There's plenty to choose from.
Speaker 1
A Baylor Monster dunk somewhere. Over Wisconsin.
There were like
Speaker 1 two Tammy Chic. I don't know.
Speaker 1
And then one more I had. It was late night last night.
The Abilene Christian Plurry doing horns down after reading Texas. Yep.
Speaker 4 That might not.
Speaker 1 Is that not NCAA?
Speaker 1 Is that not good sportsmanship?
Speaker 4
Well, the University of Texas will threaten to withhold all their financial aid that they would ever give to any other school. Yeah.
If the NCAA disrespected them.
Speaker 1
So, Hank, can you look at the business? What about the UCLA bros? Yeah, we can get them. Again, we still have half the second round.
We're going to have a throne in. Yeah.
Okay.
Speaker 1
I'll tweet out since the show will already be out. No, I want a running list, so don't tweet it.
Okay. Just keep asking every Wednesday.
And then we're going to fact check. Okay.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 It's going to be speaking. Hopefully the majority of these are on.
Speaker 4 Speaking of Rutgers, Hank, can you describe to me what this meme is real quick?
Speaker 6 No.
Speaker 6 What is that?
Speaker 6 Looks like Tony Soprano.
Speaker 4 Yeah, it's Tony Soprano on the right that says Rutgers, and then Houston on the left, and that's Christopher, and he's killing him after the car accident. I tweeted this out when Rutgers was winning.
Speaker 4 But this is a scene from the Sopranos where he kills Christopher.
Speaker 1 Did you see mine from last night?
Speaker 6 Hundreds of thousands of listeners.
Speaker 1 Did you see who was mine from last night? It was Tony.
Speaker 6 Because I never saw that.
Speaker 1 It was Tony and Polly Walnuts on a boat. I did see that.
Speaker 6 Pussy. I saw that.
Speaker 6 That was before you guys ruined the fucking show for me.
Speaker 1 On pussy, because then, not in the face.
Speaker 1
If AWS want help, they can tweet at me so I can buy more. I'm still on his thing.
I'm totally not listening to you.
Speaker 4 We're talking about Sophronic
Speaker 1
shit. I know.
You're talking about the Rocky. You're trying to ruin the Sopranos for people.
Speaker 4
Do you remember when the guy with the ponytail? What's his name? Furio. Furio.
Fury. Remember when Furio was thinking about pushing Tony into the hell colours? Yeah.
Speaker 4 Because he was trying to fuck Carmella, then they were in love, even though they never had sex, I don't think.
Speaker 1 They shared some passionate scenes of dancing in Italy and whatever.
Speaker 4 They emotionally cheated.
Speaker 1 Yes. She was dreaming about fucking him.
Speaker 4 She fantasized about him. She told Tony that one time, I've been fantasizing about Furo, but she was mad at Tony because Tony was being flagrant with his infidelity.
Speaker 4 She wasn't mad that he was cheating. She was just mad that he didn't respect her enough to keep it quiet.
Speaker 1 Also, speaking of Sopranos, that one picture of me from Friday where I'm
Speaker 1 very large, barrel-chested.
Speaker 1
I look like Cameron Cook. No, I look like I could be in the mafia.
It'll be barrel-chested men are back. Okay, it's power.
All right, random number. Wait.
18. 69.
What? 28.
Speaker 4 One more giant who's back of the week. Blake Griffin.
Speaker 1
Oh, yeah. Yeah.
He dunked. Yes, he dunks.
Yeah, but I just don't know.
Speaker 4 I feel like we should give it
Speaker 4 our.
Speaker 1 Well, no, we should. No.
Speaker 1
Dude, he can dunk. We don't have to make a big deal of it.
It was his first point.
Speaker 4 He totally can dunk. First dunk in 1980.
Speaker 1 I don't think we should.
Speaker 4
It is what it is, you know? It was also his first points. I'm pretty sure that he was like, I'm not going to score until I dunk.
Yes.
Speaker 1 It was awesome.
Speaker 4 Yeah, it was great. Yeah, I think there was an earthquake.
Speaker 1
My pick is 8.99. 28.
18. 69.
Speaker 1 61.
Speaker 4 61. Damn.
Speaker 1 We got a fun fact.
Speaker 4 Jake, pull up an animal fact.
Speaker 1 Stand by.
Speaker 4 Stand by. Love you guys.
Speaker 4 Stand by. Really love you guys.
Speaker 1 Love all of you.
Speaker 1 Every one of you guys.
Speaker 1 Guys. Parrots will selflessly help each other out.
Speaker 1 Talking away,
Speaker 1 though I don't know what I'm to say, I'd say anyway.
Speaker 1 Today's a family day to find you. Shy it away.
Speaker 1 Oh, I'll be coming for your love, okay.
Speaker 1 Shy it away.
Speaker 1 Oh, I'll be coming for your love, okay.
Speaker 1 Today Take
Speaker 1 you on
Speaker 1 me
Speaker 1 Take me
Speaker 1 on
Speaker 1 I'll be
Speaker 1 come
Speaker 1 for a journey holding
Speaker 1 on
Speaker 1 beats down a little bit
Speaker 1 Try to learn life is okay
Speaker 1 Say up to me
Speaker 1 At least no better to be safe than sorry. Say after me.
Speaker 1 A light's no better to be safe than sorry.
Speaker 1 Take on
Speaker 1 me.
Speaker 1 Take
Speaker 1 me
Speaker 1 up.
Speaker 1 I'll be
Speaker 1 gone.
Speaker 1 When I go to your dreams.
Speaker 1 How it feels like insane Everything I like
Speaker 1 Just flavor worries away
Speaker 1 You are the things I've got to remember You shine away
Speaker 1 We'll all be coming for you anyway
Speaker 1 We're all coming for you anyway
Speaker 1 Take
Speaker 1 on me
Speaker 1 Take
Speaker 1 me
Speaker 1 up.
Speaker 1 I'll be gone.
Speaker 1 Take on
Speaker 1 me.
Speaker 1 Take
Speaker 1 me
Speaker 1 up.
Speaker 1 I'll be
Speaker 1 gone.
Speaker 1 day.
Speaker 1 I'll be gone
Speaker 1 in a day.
Speaker 1 It's Pardon My Tune, presented by Bar Stool Sports.