Miami Heat’s Duncan Robinson, Mahomes Injury, 62 Text Messages, And Guys On Chicks

Miami Heat’s Duncan Robinson, Mahomes Injury, 62 Text Messages, And Guys On Chicks

January 20, 2021 1h 34m Explicit

Happy Marcus Mariota Day, a day we should never forget but totally forgot. (2:09-7:06) Mets fire their GM after story breaks of his 62 unresponded text messages and unsolicited dick pick.(7:07-16:32) Mahomes injury update. (16:33-20:48) Hot Seat Cool Throne including NCAA tourney changes. (22:32-37:03) Miami Heat Guard/SF Duncan Robinson joins the show to talk about his new podcast, the bubble run, making it to the NBA from Division 3 to Division 1, media, and Jimmy Butler. (38:44-1:19:00) We finish with guys on chicks (1:19:50-1:32:28)


You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/pardon-my-take

Listen and Follow Along

Full Transcript

Hey, Pardon My Take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music.
On today's Pardon My Take, we have Miami Heat player guard, Duncan Robinson. Great interview with him.
Eastern Conference champion. Yeah.
Bubble champ. And also, D3 runner-up, NBA runner-up.up d1 runner-up d1 runner-up billy actually asked that question because he's an asshole uh we have that we have some cleanup on uh the divisional round patrick mahomes hot seat cool throne the mets gm sent 62 unsolicited text messages we have it all all.
It's a great Wednesday show. And guys on Chicks.
Ever had one of those days when it's just too cold to keep working? Nah, neither has Ariat. Ariat work jackets and boots are packed with all the cold-stopping waterproof protection you need to get the job done under any conditions so you can take any job out there and always deliver.
Check out Ariat in your

local workwear retailer or visit Ariat.com slash work to get 10% off your first order when you

sign up for email and weather whatever in Ariat work gear. Let's go.
We'll be it higher.

Oh, we're gonna rock down to Electric Avenue.

It's part of my take.

You're getting by far.

It's part of my take.

It's part of my take.

It's part of my take.

It's part of my take.

It's part of my take.

It's part of my take.

It's part of my take.

It's part of my take.

It's part of my take.

It's part of my take.

Welcome to part of my take presented by the Cash App.

Go download it right now.

Use code BARS so you get $10 for free.

$10 to ASPCA.

Today is Wednesday, January 20thth happy Marcus Mariota day that is the holiday that we all know that we all celebrate I guess like a month ago well we created a holiday that we don't even know why we created it I think I know why I think I remember it was like when Marcus Mariota was playing on Thursday Night Football and he played well. No.
No? Nope. We're going to go back.
We're going to go to week 12. I have no recollection, by the way.
Yeah, for the record, Jake, right before we started recording, Jake goes, and remember, it's Marcus Mariota. This is the problem with Jake.
He is, well, it's actually a good thing, good problem to have, but I would say we're not really good preppers. We're kind of a fly by the-the-seat-of-our-pants guys.
Jake is now the de facto part of my take historian. So when we say shit like, hey, Jake, Marcus Mariota Day, January 20th, he actually remembers when you – no chance I remember.
He holds future us accountable, which I don't like. I mean, we're just saying things all the time that we'll take care of in a couple months,

and Jake is like, hey, remember that deadline you set for yourself?

I'd rather just forget about it.

Okay, so tell us.

So here's the back story.

It was week 12 of the NFL season.

The Raiders lost to the Falcons 43-6,

and Nathan Peterman came into the game, went 3-5,

and I think one of you said, let's see Marcus Mariota.

Okay, let's see. Let's hear it.

If you're Derek Carr, it's got to be so much worse to get benched for Nathan Peterman than for Marcus Mariota, right? Correct. I would much rather see Mariota come in off the sidelines and be like this guy.
I forgot he did too. Put that in like a Google calendar, Jake.
January 17th for Remember Marcus Mariota. Yeah, see if he's alive.
It's my sister's birthday. There we go.
Oh, happy birthday. Shout out to Matty.
Remember Marcus Mariota on that day. Is that a Tuesday or Wednesday? What is it? It is a Sunday.
I don't know why I only gave two options. Yeah.
It's a Sunday. Sunday we'll be here.
So, actually, sorry, no offense to your sister, Hank, but let's move it back.

Yep.

Actually, let's go to the following Wednesday.

Or Tuesday.

Tuesday.

It seems like a Tuesday type for a Wednesday show.

Wednesday's inauguration day.

Tuesday's the 19th.

We're really going to have a lot to talk about.

I'm going to be busy on that one.

I'm just looking at my Apple calendar and I had a thought.

Are you saying the election is official?

We're not talking about it. Okay.
All right. Well.
I'm just saying. Who said calendar and I had a thought.
Are you saying the election is official? We're not talking.

Okay.

All right.

Well.

I'm just saying.

Who said that we're not on the calendar?

You know how the holidays pop up on your Apple calendar?

That's what came up.

He didn't say who was getting inaugurated.

Yeah.

That's true.

That's a good point.

Yeah.

That's a good point.

All right.

So put it in.

That's Marcus Murillo.

Big Joe.

Remember Marcus Murillo.

Do you get inaugurated if you win?

You get re-inaugurated.

Okay. Well.
All right. So there we go.
You know what to say is. Do you get inaugurated if you win? You get re-inaugurated.
Okay, well.

All right, so there we go.

You know what today is?

Do people listen to this?

Like, that was.

We sound like fucking idiots.

That was the dumbest thing I've ever listened to.

And I just, like, it happened exactly how I did it.

Three options for a fake holiday.

Yeah, didn't remember.

We were talking about a Falcons-Chargers game.

And then Hank starts.

Falcons-Raiders game.

And Hank starts reminding us about his sister's birthday.

And people are like, this is compelling stuff.

Yes.

I don't even know. I think he's so boring he doesn't have facts.
I just looked. Marcus Mariota facts and it says Marcus Mariota was six feet four inches.
So Marcus Mariota's dead. So RIP Marcus Mariota.
What's your facts? He's from Hawaii. There we go.
Papa bless. October 30th, 1993 was his birthday.

That's actually not too far off from when we decided to make Marcus Mariota.

That's Halloween almost.

One month, exactly.

We did November 30th.

There we go.

Stars align.

This is 11 titanic facts about Marcus Mariota's magical NFL debut.

Oh, he won the Combine King Award after running a 4.48 40 yard dash in high school okay he's the combine king wow marcus mariotta the combine king do you have anything for us jake in the first half of his debut he was eight for eight for 162 uh yards and two touchdowns that's his first game ever he must have turned out to be pretty good. Whoops.
What were you going to say, Jake? I'm still looking. Yeah, there's no...
He's so boring. Okay, well, happy Marcus Mariota Day.
That's official. It is officially in the calendar.
Marcus Mariota Day every year, January. It's remember Marcus Mariota Day.
Alliteration is first and last name. Boom.
There we go. You had to look that up? No, it was just my last emergency fact.
All right. So happy Marcus Mariota Day to everyone.
Hopefully everyone has a great Marcus Mariota Day. Let's talk some other stuff.
How about the Mets general manager getting fired for 62 text messages to a female reporter, including a dick pic? I think it was a dick pic part of the 62. The dick pic was, I think, included at the tail end of the 62.
Then she answered after the dick pic. And then he sent like three more saying, I'm sorry.
But then four more. Yeah.
Yeah. Being like, you didn't get back to me about whether or not you like the dick pic.
Yes. So I've got two thoughts on this.
First of all, on top of everything else, obviously he's a scumbag and he got fired deserves to be fired first of all after that he's also a terrible negotiator what that's what do they teach you in negotiating school do they teach you to just like look really thirsty and keep calling people when they won't call you back yeah i i don't know i mean sales you're supposed to be persistent right i i guess this also is an indictment then on the indians because they just traded lindor to the mets so this guy executed the trade they did business they took his blood money uh second of all well do you disavow because he was on the cubs when he was the mets gm he was on the cubs do you disavow he was the mets gm i do disavow he's the mets gm i think we should all just remember that he's the mets gm he is the mets gm so or was the mets g. My second big takeaway is this is an all-time guy who wears Oakley sunglasses move.
Yeah. He's a big-time Oakley.
If you look at the picture that they have, he's wearing square Oakleys. And you can tell a lot about a guy by the sunglasses he wears.
Yeah. If you wear Costa sunglasses, you go deep-sea fishing twice a year.
You probably have a DUI in Florida. If you wear Shady Rays, you're cool.
You're just cool. You're the Blake of the world.
That's true. And then if you're an Oakley guy, you probably have a DUI in Florida.
If you wear shady rays, you're cool. You're just cool.

You're the Blake of the world.

That's true.

And then if you're an Oakley guy, you probably send dick pics during child support meetings.

Yes, I would say so.

Well, this wasn't during a child support meeting.

We don't know that.

It might have been.

I mean, probably the worst excuse of all time when he said those were actually just stock images because who doesn't have stock images of random erect penises in their phone? Yeah. So he went with the stock.
Like that is also a sign like, hey, man, don't go with your first defense because your first defense is going to be terrible. Like, hey, it was stock images.
I my biggest takeaway from this is we need like a school that like everyone, you know, people go to college or trade school, wherever we need like a one month seminar where people can just learn to be a normal human beings. Cause this was when I read this story and I saw that he had 62 unanswered text messages.
I like throw out just the dick pic, which is way out of bounds and unsolicited dick pic is way out of bounds to begin with but 62 text messages over like a couple months with no reply dude you need to learn like uh just a tiny bit of shame yeah because that is that's the craziest it made me like cringe and have uh shivers down my spine i can't if i text someone someone over a two day span and text them three times and they don't respond, I'm like, well, fuck me. I'll kill myself.
They don't want to talk. Either they're dead or you've got the wrong number.
Right. Here's a solution.
Every guy out there should have a number in their phone that they label as, let's just call it Kathleen from the bar. And it's a number that goes nowhere.
And you just fire off all your dick pics to that duty number. Just out into space.
And he was doing the winky face and he was doing... Yeah, that's also embarrassing to have your GM shooting off emojis.
Like question mark? Like question mark? Like question mark? This guy, he just... Maybe it's because, I don't know, he's achieved great things.
He's a GM so he probably thinks like... Well, Well, he's the GM of the Mets.
The GM of the Mets, but he was like, oh, my shit doesn't stink. I'm the GM of the Mets.
I'm a smart guy. No, you're not.
You're actually a fucking idiot because 62. How do you even go back from that, by the way? You don't.
Is that pictures there? And then the tech. So here's the thing.
thing they've got the blackout picture there so he knows that if he keeps fucking up they're liable to drop the uncensored version you mean the stock image the stock image yeah the getty the uh the picture of via getty's penis how about thinking that like that will be a good a good way to uh get out of this be like yeah dude who doesn't have stock images he went, why won't you answer me, beautiful? Am I annoying you? If you have to ask, am I annoying you, you're annoying. Answers yes.
I was going to say 62 text messages is pre-crime, but it's not. It's just crime crime.
Yeah. So that was the big news of Monday night going into Tuesday.
And credit to Steve Cohen, who I don't – I was reading his Twitter. I'm a little jealous of Mets fans' relationship with Steve Cohen.
It's nice. Because it is – like he had a tweet being like, what do you guys want new at Citi Field? And people were just responding.
Like Glennie Balls was in there being like, we need more beer. And like, you know what I mean? It was just – and he was responding to people, and it was like – I don't know.
There's something about Steve Cohen. Maybe the shine will wear off eventually.
But I have no affinity towards the Mets whatsoever. But there's something very sweet about the Mets fans' relationship.
They really just got out of, like, the worst relationship with the Wilpons. And now they have cool new dad who will tweet them back and be like hey guys you want to do a trade let's let's crowdsource a trade who do you guys want on the team and the people are like hey we want trevor bauer he's like all right i'll go get trevor bauer and it's very much a double-edged sword because once things start to go bad yeah he's gonna have a different entire outlook on twitter but it does go to show you that no matter how many billions of dollars you get in your life the one thing that you're always going to want is to well to own a sports team and then to be cool online yes and this guy so steve cohen he did deal with it correctly and that he fired him pretty much instantly in the morning but he had a moment last night where everyone's like this guy tweets all the time where's his? So that also is a double-edged sword where if you're the tweet guy, you can't be like, well, he's got no way to get in touch.
They'll do a press conference. He's like, no, he goes directly to the fans, which is cool, until there's some issue and it's like, well, you've got to actually address this.
He's going to have to hire a heavy, a dude that gives the bad news to the fan base so that he can continue to have this cool Uncle Steve persona. He should just have Frank the Tank be his press secretary for any bad news that needs to be delivered.
Yes, yes. I would love that.
I don't know. I'm jealous of the Steve Cohen relationship that Mets fans have with him.
Also, Darren, Darren Revelle, please tell me how much advertising Oakley got out of that deal, having it plastered everywhere. Like the minors that came out of the – Exactly, like the minors, yeah.
Also, could you imagine... I can't imagine the GM from any other team doing this, and I don't know them personally, but this just feels like a problem that would only happen with the Mets.
Right. Billy Bean would be like...
And in fact, it didn't even happen with the Mets. It did happen with the Cubs, but it's the Mets GM.
Let's just be honest, it's the Mets GM. I could see...
But the fact that they hired him and then it happened. A smart GM like Billy Bean gets in trouble for sending pictures of his balls.

Balls are underrated.

They're undervalued.

The Cubs, like Theo, it might actually be now his greatest move ever was leaving the Cubs right before everything just fell apart.

Because John Lester is now a Washington National.

Kyle Schwarber, like Udarvish gets traded.

This comes out. The baby Cubs.
All this happens and it's like, hey, Theo might have seen something. So I went and looked.
Glennie's response to Steve Cohen was, Steve, I mean, how about that? Steve Cohen, the owner of the Mets, is letting Glennie Balls call him by his first name. He says, Steve, can we add more all-inclusive tickets, including alcohol, around the stadium like in the M&M suite seats? Thanks.
I'll hang up and listen. Gunny just wants to pay one price for all his food and beer.
Okay? Is that so hard? It shouldn't be. Can we have a buffet instead of the handicap railings that take you down? Oh my god.
It's so fucking good. So yes, Jerry Porter jerry porter scumbag very cringeworthy 62 on just guys if you're sending more than three you you she probably doesn't want to talk to you anymore okay three over three days that's a good sign to stop texting yeah and i think as far as dick pics go just never send them just don't just don't unless you have a notarized form that's been signed, dated, stamped that says, I would like to see your penis on my cell phone.
Well, it's also like a scared straight. Like, if you were...
I think Mark Cuban maybe has told us that, like, if you send a dick pic out, you're sending it to the whole internet because eventually it will... Oh, yeah.
It's going to come out. Well, unless it's a stock image, which, again...
I'm going to... Should I just Google stock image penis? Yeah, he should have been smarter and done, like, Getty Images over it.
Yeah. His dick having a nice cup of coffee.
I do feel bad for the report. I mean, this is essentially like we hear these stories like, hey, this is what it's like to be a woman in sports.
You're like, oh, fuck, 62 fucking text messages?

That's crazy and scary and weird.

So maybe it was a stock, because it's blurred out.

You can't see it.

Maybe it is the diagram that you see in health class.

It's this one.

The one you see in health class that's just the penis hanging over the wall. This one had his shitty shower in it, which makes it even worse.

Who hasn't sent this to a girl?

Oh, my God.

Nothing gets a girl going like seeing the health class he also he also sent one in in his jeans which is a that's a wiener move and i mean that not as a wiener like i mean that anthony wiener yes he did that move he hasn't been in the news he would send pictures i think like when he was hanging out with his kids of his penis in his underwear it's not a dick pic yeah um all right divisional just clean up. So Patrick Mahomes apparently doesn't have a concussion, which we talked about on Sunday, but it's now coming out.
He has a pinched nerve. Yeah, it's his neck.
So it was just a neck issue that caused the entire left side of his body. He basically had a stroke over the span of a quarter second is what they're saying, where a neck just shut down one side of his body entirely.
And now he's fine. So he the concussion protocol oh he is because he doesn't need to be once you get put in the protocol there's no getting out unless you pass the test at the end of the week yeah so i'm i'm ready to say that i think that he will pass the concussion protocol test at the end of the week i think we're not paying enough attention to his foot injury he's got turf toe he's gonna play is the most serious injury in in all of football so he's gonna play through both and but i i do agree that like the the toe would it's gonna make it harder for him to be 100 patrick holmes and a lot of people got mad at me because i said the bills could blow out the chiefs that was i i guess i should have just phrased it the lame way and been like it's a coin flip game yeah because that's how I see it I was more saying that like I a Chiefs could blow out the Bills I'm saying a blowout wouldn't surprise me either way like I think that it just wouldn't the Bills people think that the Bills blowing out the Chiefs would be some shocking uh result but to me it wouldn't be because I think both these teams are so fucking good that if either shows up with their A-plus game, they will blow out the opponent.
Yeah, the Bills have had like three games this year where if they play like those Bills, they win this game. The Chiefs have had, how many perfect games have the Chiefs had this year? They haven't covered in nine straight games.
Yeah, but also the Lions are like 16 and a half or some of them. No, not really.
Not like that crazy. The Chiefs, I can remember them having at least two A-plus games.
Bills, I'm remembering like three A-plus games. Yeah, but even the Chiefs' A-plus games, like the Bucs, they had an A-plus half, remember? And then they kind of let the Bucs back in.
They get cute. So, I don't know.
It's going to be – I'm very excited for the championship Sunday. I think we're going to have some good guests on Friday to break it down who maybe has been in a few championship Sundays.
but yeah it's all going to be i'm very excited for the championship sunday i think we're gonna have some uh good guests on on friday to break it down who maybe has been in a few championship sundays um but yeah it's all going to be awesome what was the bet that we had hank it was if patrick mahomes doesn't play it had nothing to do with a head injury just if he didn't play right yep okay so if he doesn't play because of the toe i still win the bet i still get to capture normie for a week and make him fat yeah i think that's that's that's true i'm gonna feed him so much bad stuff stuff. He's going to play.
All butter. He's going to play.
And on the last day, I'm going to give him all the stuff that gives him diarrhea right before I give him back to you. He's going to play.
Yeah, probably. You're right.
He's going to play. Yeah, he's going to play.
I mean, Colin Coward tried to say that the NFL should postpone the game if Patrick Holmes can't play, which was Coward just being like, hey, I want to go viral for a bad opinion, which he does once a month. Yeah, Colin imagines that everybody that listens to his show is the vice president of marketing or works in finance and understands that the dollar bills mean everything to Colin.
And he's like, yeah, these C-suite guys, in between their shareholder conference calls, are just tuning into the herd real quick, get some takes, and then put me on mute again. What else we got? Oh, we did get a little bit.
I was watching the Bucs-Nets game on Monday night. We got a little taste of who gets the last shot.
So we had a two-last-shot situation. So they were down.
I think it was by two. Or no, they were down by one.
Harden took the last shot with 40 seconds left and then miss got the rebound pass it's kevin durant who then drained the last shot and then they were up to with 30 seconds left so it's like who's taking the last dagger shot that was durant okay and then kairi might be coming back tonight so what i think this is like a next level conversation of who gets the last shot i think we're're in kind of who's the odd man out territory. The odd man out.
So I think we've got two Batmans in Harden and Durant. And then Kyrie is kind of going to end up being Robin on the side.
So those two are definitely going to click up. I'll put it this way.
I think it's like Blink-182. I think that Kevin Durant and James Harden are Mark and Travis, and then obviously Kyrie's Tom.
And then he's off somewhere studying aliens. Doing aliens, yep.
And then he's going to get pushed off to the side eventually. But yeah, I'm very excited to have the odd man out conversation.
Yes. I mean, this is, again, where the fans have won.
All right, let's do Hot Seat Cultural, and then we've got Duncan Robinson, a little more NBA talk. When your home system or appliance breaks down, American Home Shield will help fix or replace the covered item, no matter its age.
Visit AHS.com slash listen for 20% off any plan. See AHS.com slash contracts for coverage details, limitations, and exclusions.
Okay, Hot Seat, Cool Throne, Hank. My Hot Seat is your goat, Big Cat.
My goatee? Nope. Oh.
Your goat. My goat.
Djokovic. The Djokovic.
Oh, yeah. Listen, I, this guy, I watched one Wimbledon match three years ago, and I've gotten attached to this fucking scumbag who's an idiot.
You guys may remember. You guys may remember.
But he's better than Federer. A few months ago, he hosted his own tennis event in, like, the peak of COVID.
Yeah. How'd that go? Where there was no regulations.
It turned out to be a super spreader event. Wait, it was better than spreader? They traced it back to spreading coronavirus all over the Balkans.
Okay. From this one event.
Then, so the Australian Open, Australia has COVID under control. They have a bunch of precautions, regulations, and stuff.
Djokovic sent in basically his own list of requests and suggestions on how they can actually do a better job with COVID.

Oh, so he's helping.

He's trying to help.

He's trying to help.

And they shot it down immediately.

We were like, you're a fucking idiot.

Why would we ever take advice from the guy who hosted his own tennis event?

Because he knows what not to do because he already spread it everywhere.

His suggestions were to basically lessen the restrictions, make it easier.

Basically, he was selfish.

It was a bunch of selfish requests. I agree with Big Cat a little bit on this, because if you're going to plan a music festival, you would hire Billy McFarland, because he's made all the mistakes.
He knows all the potholes. He knows all the danger areas.
So yeah, bring Djokovic in there and have him be the blind spot guy. Have you ever watched Catch Me If You Can? Boom.
Frank Abagnale. Hire that dude.
Okay? So Djokovic is the perfect guy to hire. Also, let's just spin it this way, Hank.
We talk about how much we love SEC coaches, how funny they are. He just sounds like an SEC coach.
Herd immunity. Yeah.
He's just like, hey, let's all get it, and then we don't get it again, which is proven to be wrong. If you bred Mike Leach with Trevor Bauer.
Maybe a little dabbo in him. Yeah.
Yeah. Why not? I will say there was a nice video of him.
He's quarantining in his hotel room, going on the balcony, and watching some kids play on the street. Yeah.
And he could probably whip those kids if he needed to. Thanks, Jake.
You know what? Some things are bigger than sports. I don't even like tennis.
That's amazing.

Fuck, man.

But he is better than Federer.

So he went out there and he looked at kids from his hotel room balcony.

Yeah.

What a touching moment.

It's very nice.

He was like giving them some applause.

Okay, you know what?

Six months from now.

Not during the point.

Novak Djokovic Day.

Yeah.

Yeah, there we go.

He was probably spitting on the kids.

Being like, here, kids, you need this to be stronger.

Jake, make this a year later.

Well, that's always fun in the balcony.

You want to see where your spit lands.

A year later, it's Marcus Mariota slash Novak Djokovic Remembrance Day.

Both of them on January 19th, 2022.

I mean, we found out very quickly that Marcus Mariota is the most boring person to ever have a day for.

All right, so they're sharing their day.

Yeah, we'll have a new story.

Today is still just Mariota. Correct.
Today, 2021. Do we want it to be on a Wednesday? Because of no recording day.
No, you know, yeah, you're right. Shift Marcus Mariota day.
Back to January 18th. Yeah, January 18th.
What about doing it on Hank's sister's birthday? That's a Monday. It's also MLK day.
There's already a Monday day. It's always the closest.
Martin Luther King Novak Jokovic. Yeah, the closest Tuesday to January 18th.
Okay. January 18th, 2022.
Marcus Mario Day. Slash Novak Jokovic.
Perfect. Slash day after Hank's sister's birthday.
And my cool throne is the Peaky fucking Blinders. Yeah.
They started filming season five today. And now, so I watched the Peaky Blinders during quarantine.
And before I watched it, I was like, I can't spoil it because I don't remember what happens. I watched it during today and now i so i watched the piggy blinders during quarantine and before i watched it pick i was like i can't spoil it because i don't remember what happens i watched it during quarantine and now that statement rings true because like i don't really even remember exactly what happens at the end of the seasons uh but they started recording started filming season five then the director like creator whatever said that there's going to be a feature film that comes out to end the entire thing which is okay that's hype like that Like, that's an exciting.
It's better than a season. Like, it's just a nice.
It's like Entourage. Yeah.
The problem with that is they're going to not have the subtitles in the movie theater. That's going to be a big pain in the ass.
Well, are we ever going back to movie theaters? Like, can we all agree that you just. I like going to movie theaters.
I agree. I agree.
It's a good, like, let's go to the movies. I feel like I ran a marathon.
Totally agree. I worked out.
I don't want movie theaters to go away, but I'm saying, give me the option to be able to buy every single movie at home right away. But then- Like, that's just, let me have that option.
No, because then I would just do- I focus better on a movie in the movie theaters the first time than I do at home, no matter what. You're forced to watch it.
Yeah. You're not looking at your phone.
You're not getting up to pee as much. Yeah.
I do subtitles. They need to have subtitle theaters for Peaky Blinders.
For sure. But yeah, I'm hyped.
Okay. Is that it, Hank? Hot seat, cool thrones? That's it? Just doing the minimum guy.
My hot seat is being able to talk about the Houston Texans on television. So Dan Orlovsky was talking about the Texans' GM mess.
Just the entire shit show that is the front office right now in Houston. And he said that it's worse than is being reported.
And it's worse than it's so bad I can't say it on television. What's worse than being reported? They murdered Deshaun Watson.
He said it's so bad. And his body's rotting in the stadium.
It's so bad I can't talk about it on television. So that takes my brain to the point where there's murders.
They're taking phone calls from Deshaun Watson and just picking up the phone and saying the N-word and hanging up on him. It's crazy.
How bad could it get that you can't say it on television? And he hasn't even notes-apped it yet. Well, then we know that it could get worse.
It could always get worse. Because if it's notes-pped, then it's the worst it could possibly be, like Doug Peterson's playing Nate Sudfeld for a few drives.
Yeah, but what could they... The worst of the worst.
What are they doing in that office? Is it satanic orgies? They are hijacked by a dude who just, yeah, they're going to pray on it. And I actually, I feel like there's a part of them, and there's actually a part of me, like maybe 1%.
I'm not a God guy, but if they pray hard enough, could they win a Super Bowl? Yeah, I think so. Right? I don't know.
But then you have to think that every other franchise is probably praying, too. Not as hard as they are.
Other franchises are actually trying to get better on the football field. They're saying, let's forget the football field.
Let's just pray the fuck out of this thing. Right now, if're joel austin you need to go to the houston texan stadium right now because you could probably get hired yeah if you walk in the door with enough confidence which i know you have fly your little private jet across town land it on the 50 yard line step off and declare yourself the head coach of the houston texans and say god delivered me a message i bet you that jack easterby would say that's our guy guy.
Right. God has delivered us.
Like, that's the thing with prayer, though. I don't think it's going to work.
I don't think that them praying will replace keeping Deshaun Watson and making sound roster decisions. But what about thoughts and prayers? I don't know.
They're trying something different. I don't know.
Thinking outside the box. Yeah.
I need to know what's so bad that Dan Orlovsky can't say it on television. Oh, man.
They should let Deshaun Watson be the coach. Yeah.
Why not? Fuck it. Yeah.
My cool throw in his sea shanties. How about, wait, one more thought about this.
How about the fact that, like, Bill O'Brien has to be so happy that he left and everyone's like, Bill O'Brien's the worst. What shit show and it got way worse turns out bill was keeping the team together he was the only he might have been bad but man do you regret getting rid of him well you know why because of bill o'brien at least you had a guy you could point at and say that's the problem that's the bad guy and since you don't have anyone you can point at right then you're like what the fuck what's going on here they should just make up like an interim general manager and have everybody be mad at that guy yes that doesn't even exist but the fact that there's nobody to blame makes it way worse yep um my cool throne is sea shanties oh yeah sea shanties are back in a big way have you have you seen and heard the sea shanties uh i don't understand what a sea shanty is it's like SpongeBob? It's like the devil's singing a lullaby.
Oh, yeah, yeah, I saw Roans.

That was great. The Irish rap.
No, that was a battle rap. No, no, no.
He did the Irish rap sea shanty. Oh, yeah.
Sea shanties are like yo-ho-ho in a bottle of rum. Yeah, yeah, he did that.
That type of thing. I saw the Packer fan, too, that made me want to puke.
They've gone very viral in the last couple weeks. People are getting really into sea shanties.
I want to, I feel like

we should do a sea shanty for Billy.

We should invite a sea shanty as, because we did

that one for Hank. Aren't you doing

Imagine Dragons? I'm doing an Imagine Dragons

one, but now sea shanties are just so hot.

Okay, we'll do that. Can you combine?

I hope you die, I hope you die.

And if you don't, don't come back

ever again. I disavow that.

I want, I miss Billy. I truly do miss Billy.
Yeah. Yeah.
I do. It's good to have somebody that you can point at and blame.
He's a Bill O'Brien. Someone dropped a bunch of heavy boxes in the studio, and they're just going to sit here until he comes back.
I miss Billy, too. I do.
I miss Billy as well. I fucking miss that guy.
Because you know what? He at least would have been like, hey, want to order dinner? I would have remembered to order dinner.

He kept us on schedule for dinners.

And he

would sometimes... If the studio got

too crowded with beer, he'd be like,

hey guys, can I clean this up and take

a few of these cases home for you guys?

That was kind of nice. Alright, my hot

seat is the NCAA.

So they screwed up the

schedule. Nah, screw up is probably the wrong word.
They changed the schedule for the they screwed up the schedule.

Nah, screw up is probably the wrong word.

They changed the schedule for the basketball tournament,

the March Madness.

And I know everyone's going to say,

well, at least there's going to be March Madness this year.

Agreed.

But they have eliminated the first Thursday.

I think this is just for this year, right, Jake? Yeah.

Remember, they didn't eliminate it.

They're still the first four.

No, they eliminated it.

Because Thursday is the greatest day in the sports calendar

when you're like, we have four days of this.

It is the best day ever.

So they eliminated it. Because Thursday is the greatest day in the sports calendar when you're like, we have four days of this.
It is the best day ever. So they've changed it.
It now goes Friday. So Thursday is the first four.
Friday, Saturday, first round. Sunday, Monday, round two.
So we're going to be watching. See, I can't get into this.
It's tough. Monday is not a day to be tuning into true tv it's a recovery day it is can you imagine how sad that's gonna be i got a cuck revel on the uh true tv he always does like waking up to seeing this on true tv yeah like some like crime show yeah it's like castle yeah usually yeah so so and then i do actually like that they're the sweet 16 and elite eight sweet 16 is saturday sunday lead eight monday tuesday I'm okay with that because Sweet 16 and Elite 8, Sweet 16 is Saturday, Sunday, Elite 8, Monday, Tuesday.

I'm okay with that because Elite 8 is weird when you have the Elite 8 on that Saturday and Sunday and you're like, wait, there's only two games?

Like where's the rest of my basketball?

Whereas now you'll work all day Monday and then you get basketball

at the end of the day.

But the second round being on a Monday is just my brain cannot understand it. It really sucks because it's the end of that week where you get the Thursday and the Friday off where you check out on Wednesday afternoon.
You know that that's the last piece of work you're doing that week. Right.
And then Thursday morning you come in and you can just kind of coast into the weekend. Now you check out on that Friday morning, which is fine.
Take that Friday off. Or if you're at work, don't do any work.

But then on Monday morning, that's a whole new week.

So people, if you don't do any work on that Monday,

your boss is going to be like, what the hell?

This is a new week.

We got to get shit done.

Right.

It really pushes a problem on you where you have to work

while watching the games as opposed to pretending to work.

It's also just change.

Don't do change.

And what about the vasectomies?

When are we going to do the vasectomies? Someone's getting screwed out of their vasectomy. Someone's going to get a vasectomy on that Thursday.
Let us know if you scheduled a vasectomy on that Thursday. And now it gets four games.
You're going to go in, come back, and you're going to have a bag of frozen peas on your nuts, and you're going to be watching Murray State play against Creighton. Yeah, and then Creighton's pretty good this year.
And then monday you're gonna be back at work and there's gonna be games on um all right my cool throne is the state of michigan because the barstool sportsbook app is coming to the state of michigan on friday at 12 p.m we will be live the barstool sportsbook app you can download it right now actually uh you can put in money right now we're also matching pen is matching if you deposit and play with what you deposit they will match for the Barstool Fund in the state of Michigan so we're going to help local businesses in the state of Michigan and we'll be at Greektown watching the conference championship games on Sunday you can watch us on a live stream and go download the app very excited about that Detroit's one of my favorite cities even if you don't live it's nice to have the app. I just use it to check lines and stuff.
Yeah, exactly. And play a game, what's the line? How else are you going to play? We're pretty good at that one.
Has the line moved in the Buffalo game? It's two and a half right now. Let me see.
Which would, yeah, it's weird. I mean, I guess people think the Bills are good.
Jake, do you have a hot seat? I think Mahomes doesn't play. Yeah, a hot seat is the Australian cricket team.
India upset them. India had a bunch of injuries.
Is he a wagon? Yeah, I wouldn't call that an upset. As a matter of fact, Jake, you've lost a lot of our Indian listeners.
Can I give the context? By the way, Duke is not ranked for the first time in, like, forever. Neither is North Carolina.
You think Coach K is going to come down with something? India's cricket team gutted by injuries and deflated by hearing racist abuse from the home crowd defeated a confident Australian team on its home turf. The win is being called one of the greatest in India's cricketing history.
Yep. Alright.
I said this was like such a Cinderella story for India to win this game. Very happy about that.
How long did the game last? I don't know. Six days? Five, yeah.
Five weeks. Cool throne is Willy Wonka.
They're making a prequel in 2020. What? Disavow.
Too much. They've already redone it.
Yeah, the redo wasn't good. The OG one was good.
It was scary. The redo was scary.
There's just no originality anymore. It's sad.
It is sad. Let's just look at movies that made money.
How can we squeeze more money out of it? Let's make a prequel that no one cares about. Like, no one gives a fuck what Willy Wonka was doing.
Like, I don't know. Just make boner dogs.
Make boner dogs. I'm actually...
Like, how did he come up with that factory? And why wasn't he seen for a long time? It's not Charlie. It's Willy Wonka.
Yeah. I'm kind of...
How do you get all the fucking... What's it called? Oompa Loompas.
Where'd those guys come from? I'm talking... I'm in.
I'm in. Are these questions we don't want the answer to? I don't know.
I'm once again asking you to stop remaking movies. It's not a remake.
It's a prequel. Is it gritty? If you just put the word gritty prequel in there, then I'm all in.
The more I'm thinking about it, some fucking random dude, single dude in his 50s, owns a chocolate factory he hasn't been seen for 20 years. He's got a bunch of Oompa Loompas going around in a chocolate river and all this scary shit.
How the fuck did that happen? I don't know. But if you get Joaquin Phoenix to play the role, I'm back.
I'm in. I'm in.
I'm in. Now that I've talked it through, I'm in on this movie because I have a lot of questions.
All right. Let's get to our interview with Duncan Robinson.
Great interview with Duncan Robinson. Always awesome to have a guest on who listens to the show, gets the show, and can also give shit to Billy back.
We're going to get right back to the show. Building a business may feel like a big jump, but OnDeck small business loans can help keep you afloat.
With lines of credit up to $100,000 and term loans up to $250,000, OnDeck lets you choose the loan that's right for your business. As a top-rated online small business lender, OnDeck's team of loan advisors can help you find the right business loan to fit your needs.
Visit OnDeck.com for more information. Depending on certain loan attributes, your business loan may be issued by OnDeck or Celtic Bank.
OnDeck does not lend in North Dakota. All loans and amounts subject to lender approval.
All right, back to part of my take. Okay, here he is, Duncan Robinson.
Okay, we now welcome on a very special guest.

It is Duncan Robinson. Okay, we now welcome on a very special guest.
It is Duncan Robinson from the Miami Heat. He has a new podcast.
It is called The Long Shot. It is under the JJ Redick 342 Productions.
It's coming out. I don't know what we're going to put this out next week.
So it is out you can download it, you can get it anywhere you can get podcasts Duncan, thank you for joining us anytime someone comes on and is like I got a new podcast what's your problem man? are you trying to squeeze this out? what's going on here? I don't think you need to worry about that I think you guys have solidified your place within the market, but more so just trying to motivate, you know what I mean, just provide some more competition, hopefully inspire you guys to stay on the top of your game, which you've been on for quite some time, so good to see you for that. No, we appreciate hungry dogs run faster, so it's good to have somebody nipping at the old heels there.
I saw you had a great game yesterday. Congratulations.
Were you trying to impress us? You just doing that so that we would gas you up a little bit when you came on here? That was in the back of my mind. I think it probably would have been more impressive if it was in a winning effort.
But, you know, nonetheless, you can only do what you can. So, unfortunately, we weren't able to get it done.
Yeah, it's got to be so sweet to just catch fire and just know that, like, every shoot the ball, it's going to go in like that Steph Curry video that came out a couple weeks ago when he hit was like 103 threes in a row in practice. What's the most consecutive threes that you've made just in a gym by yourself? I'd probably say I think somewhere around the 60s.
I think Steph was 105, which was incredibly impressive. I've never gotten on video like that.
But yeah, I think I'm somewhere in the 60s um i think steph was 105 which was incredibly impressive i've never gotten on video like that uh but yeah i think i'm somewhere in the in the 60s god damn it you must feel like a superhero yeah that's awesome i i so badly want to be able to shoot a three-pointer like that even like 10 in a row would be incredible yeah i mean i i feel that way towards dunking and and being able to jump really high so um i feel you in that that sort of emotion of want but uh yeah i i can do the shooting thing but the other areas i struggle that's a uh it's a debate that we've had on this show before what's sicker being able to like throw down a sick dunk or just getting really hot from three in a in a in a pickup perspective like i've always i've always thought like in a pickup perspective when someone gets really hot from three and you're playing pickup basketball and they can basically end the game it's the coolest thing whereas a dunk i you know guys dunks sometimes but it's always like all right dude you're kind of showing off in a pickup game i don't know i think i'd I'd push back on that. I feel like in a regular pickup setting, dunks would be just more impressive in that anyone can kind of get hot and string together four or five makes from three in a row, but you're not going through a lot of random courts and seeing guys just flying through the air dunking on people.
Yeah. I mean, I guess usually the dunks happen on fast, like, on fast breaks when no one's around and they can, like, really line themselves up.
I think if it's a pickup game where there's another guy on the court that can also dunk, then it's cool to dunk. But if you're, like, the only one out there that has the ability, then it's a little bit of an asshole move.
Yes. Play below the risk.
That I understand. All right, so people know, I think most most people know your backstory but let's go through

it again just because it is incredible you went to uh uh college williams college which no one really knows of it's a division three um you were an athlete there you transferred to michigan you played three years in michigan was in a national title in division three and division one and then it ended up in the NBA.

Like, so what, like, was there a national title in Division III and Division I, and then ended up in the NBA. So was there a moment in time where you're like, holy shit, this is actually happening? Like I'm actually doing this? Because Williams College to the NBA, that's insane.
I would imagine Williams College is not much different than a really good pickup game. No offense to Williams College, but offense.
It's better than a really good pickup game, I will say that. Small college basketball does not get the recognition that it probably deserves.
But with that being said, there were various moments throughout the journey when I was like, I can't believe this is actually happening. But also like when I transferred to Michigan, I wasn't like some stud at Michigan either.
I was very much a role player. I was on good teams, fortunate enough to be on some really good teams and win a lot.
But, you know, it wasn't this like surefire thing that I was going to be an NBA player. So it's always kind of been this like incremental process of growth and realization that I might have a chance to be able to do something.
So, you know, just just been able to take advantage of opportunities, basically. Would you say that if other kids that were in Division three, let's say, well, let's say Williams specifically, let's just use Williams as an example.
If they played sports at Williams, if they had any bit of like can do attitude or like stick to it of this, they too can be successful in life. Or do you think that maybe you're just the unicorn and you're different than everyone else? No, I don't think I'm any sort of unicorn or different.
You know, I don't want to put a ceiling or a cap on anybody. But, you know, a place like Williams, Williams is a great school, so I wouldn't blame people for leaning into the academic side of that and being successful in another world.
What if you're not very smart, though? Yeah, you're also stupid. Yeah, you're dumb, but you play a sport at Williams.
Would you recommend maybe, if you have any eligibility left, maybe go into a big state school like Michigan to use up that one year athletically and maybe get some buzz going towards your athletic career? Yeah, that probably seems like the right move. Yeah.
Honestly, at that point, if you're a Division III athlete and you're not very smart, I still think you're capable of doing anything. You put your mind to it.
But, yeah, you've definitely got some things working against you at that point. It's interesting.
On a real note, you mentioned how you weren't sure, or there were a lot of people out there who weren't sure that your game would translate from what it was in college as kind of a role player, like a catch-and-shoot guy the NBA. But as you, I guess you had a, you had the heat kind of take a chance on you.
They believed in you a little bit. Was there a moment when you were practicing or maybe it was, you know, like in the developmental league where you realized, Hey, I can do this.
Like this is an actual opportunity for me that I can succeed at. Yeah.
That probably came in the summer league. referenced kind of my role at Michigan, and I think Summer League allowed me to kind of be viewed in a little bit of a different light, and that I was asked to do a little bit more and given some more opportunities.
So I had a pretty good start to Summer League, and at that point, I was like, started thinking, you know, maybe I could maybe do this. And then I spent a year basically in the G League back and forth with the heat.
And then from there, it just kind of builds, you know, over time. I read that that Spolstra makes you run sprints if you pump fake in practice.
Is that still true to like encourage you to trust your shot and pull the trigger? We're past that. Fortunately, that was early on when I first got to training camp my first year just because I couldn't wrap my mind around this idea that he wanted me to shoot every time I touched it, basically.
It was just so strange to me that I was on the same team as Dwayne Wade, who'd won three NBA championships, but I'm the one, the undrafted guy, who averaged eight points a game his senior year in college to shoot it every time. So there's definitely some, you know, push and pull with that.
And then once I finally was able to kind of wrap my mind around that and just be like super aggressive, that's when it all kind of started to come together, I guess. How much did you have to pay Jimmy Butler for the coffee? I didn't pay Jimmy anything.
I don't really drink coffee. Oh.
I don't drink coffee, but truthfully, I wouldn't have paid him even if I did. I think that's an absolute scam of a deal.
$20 for a cup of coffee. But it was really good coffee, I heard.
Wait. Did other people pay? Other people paid, right? Other people did pay.
Once again, you heard it was really good coffee. Who really knows? He's controlling the narrative with that type of stuff, directing what comes out of big-face coffee.
I heard it was pretty good relative to what we had to deal with or what we are disposable in the bubble, but I don't think it was anything above and beyond. At least that's my interpretation of it.
you just charge 20 for coffee then people will assume that it's good it's one of those things where it's like psychologically controlling it's expensive therefore i'm enjoying it right and and he has all like the the different like maker i don't even know how to make coffee really but like he has all the different machines and devices to like and has access to all the best beans whatever you want to call it so maybe it is really good i don't i wouldn't be able to tell like i i you could try mcdonald's or dunkin donuts coffee and they would taste the same to me i'm just not a big coffee guy person well i owe you an apology then because when we when the story came out in the summer and we were talking about like who's who's actually buying this coffee i pretty much was like yeah i mean duncan robinson and myers leonard are on the team. Essentially calling you guys bitches.
But I was like yeah. They're definitely paying whatever Jimmy says the coffee price is.
So my apology. You did not buy the coffee.
Was there. That run.
Obviously you guys came short. But the bubble run.
We talked to a few different people who were in the bubble. the last few months was it helpful for you guys to all be together all the time and like have that cohesive unit and and get along with each other because it seemed like you guys got along yeah we we uh felt that it was a big competitive advantage for us um mostly just because we really enjoyed being around each other and i think that there are other teams around the league that maybe aren't that way.
So for us, it was like an opportunity to use that as an advantage. And we also had guys that were like kind of willing to embrace what comes with basically being in like isolation for a hundred days and just being able to lock in and focus on the opportunity at hand so I think it helped us for sure but it's definitely a challenge certainly wasn't easy I mean 100 days without seeing your family friends or basically being able to leave the confines of Disney World is definitely a challenge is there anything that you miss about the bubble uh I don't know about miss but I did did really enjoy like, you know, professional basketball is very different than college basketball.
And now like in college, you do everything with your teammates and you live together, you like train, you study, like you do everything, you know, practice games, travel, all that stuff. And professionals is different in that, you know, guys show up and then when they leave, they go home to their families and they treat it very much like a job.
So I like the bubble in that we ate all our meals together. We were always around each other and you got to know your teammates just on a different level, which I was appreciative of and really the beneficiary of in that I had the opportunity to sit down with guys like Andre, Jimmy, and really get to pick their brain on different things.
So is Jimmy Butler a good teammate? Jimmy Butler is a great teammate. I don't understand the media twist on what he is.
I'm not saying you guys. I'm sure you guys don't.
I think he's a top five player. PFT has slandered Jimmy Butler.
No, no, no. I used to slander him, but Jimmy Butler legitimately has become one of my favorite players in the entire NBA.
But he used to slander him a lot. Yeah, I mean, I will say this.
I don't necessarily blame the general public for developing those types of opinions because that's what you hear from the media. That's what gets pushed.
Now that I've had the opportunity to kind of be in it and see what he's like on a day-to-day, like, he's a great teammate. He challenges people and he pushes people.
And, you know, a lot of people aren't willing or wanting to maybe hear that. But in reality, it's just trying to achieve, you know, success, to try to win and try to push you and try to get a better version of yourself.
So he's certainly had a huge impact on my career, and I'm thankful to have played with him. Yeah, I mean, it was really just the T-Wolves thing.
Because the Bulls, his exit from the Bulls was 100% blamed on the Bulls. And then the T-Wolves, you know, they didn't want to pay him a long-term deal, and they separated.
But it seems like I would have, like from the outside, I think most people now have kind of changed their perception been like he's clearly a good teammate he's clearly a guy who you know the whole argument was can you win a championship with him being like the best guy you were pretty damn close and obviously LeBron is an AD it's very hard to beat them but you guys were pretty close do you think there was was any part of you that's like, if we didn't have a couple of those injuries because, like, Dragic gets injured, Bam gets injured, do you think that that series would have been maybe a little bit more competitive? Yeah, obviously. You know, the competitive side of us, we really believe that.
And we know that when we're at our best, we're capable of beating anybody. It's obviously not a perfect game and it's not gonna be a perfect situation or scenario so you know you have guys go down like that you don't want to make excuses or put asterisks on things because that's just not how basketball works you know people deal with or sports in general you know people deal with injuries and still find ways so um certainly no excuses but obviously we would have loved to have played that whole series

with a full and healthy roster and see where the chips have fallen on that. It doesn't guarantee

anything, but I think it's certainly, we would have had a better chance at it for sure.

Who has sicker tattoos? You or Tyler Hero?

I mean, that one's got to go to Tyler. I don't have any tattoos.
So I think by default,

he's got to take that one.

Oh, I thought you had an arm tattoo. If you look up a picture of yourself on Google Images, there's a picture of you with an arm tattoo.
Yeah, I don't spend too much time on Google Images of myself. But that may have been started in that there was some controversy or basically a story that had kind of been pushed from JJ Redick, actually.
Because, you know, he's got the sleeve and everything that I should get some tattoos to kind of raise my credibility and respect around the league and that that would help. So I've been thinking about it.
You know, I don't know if you guys have any opinions on that. If you think I should.
Yes. Yeah, absolutely.
Bring back barbed wire. Yes.
Barbed wire is always a winning move. Yes.
Absolutely get it. It just makes you instantly like everything about your game will be better if you have a sleeve.
Yeah. I've thought that.
I've also thought that like from just a respect standpoint, you know, like whether it be the opposition, you know, I particularly like in the playoffs, I got, you know, targeted a lot on defense. I figured maybe that would happen a little bit less if I had some on me.
So how much does that suck? Like when you could tell the other team is essentially their game plan is like, let's just do pick and rolls till Duncan Robinson is one on one with LeBron. Do you what are you saying to yourself in those moments? I mean, we we put schemes to like try to avoid that not to get like basketball like no please do no nerdy yeah yeah yeah so like there's obviously like defensive schemes on like shows and like you know hard hedges and stuff like that to like just kind of put two on the ball for a second then have me rotate out so i'm not um you know i pretty with everybody in the league except those guys, like LeBron's, which honestly, just truthfully, I'm not built to guard those.
Yeah, that's not a shameful thing to be like, hey, I can't guard LeBron James. Yeah, for a while there, it was hard.
And it was kind of like a mentally like a mental hurdle I had to get over. But then it was also like, you know what, it's not really personal.
Like, of course, we're going to be better as a team of Jimmy or Bam, our guarding is guarding LeBron instead of me like that. That's just a fact.
I don't think anyone would argue with that. So if we can figure out a way for me not to be on LeBron, then that would be very beneficial to us.
So knowing that, then was it hurtful to your feelings when Spoh is at the whiteboard and he's like, make sure that Duncan never gets left out on an island defense? This is specifically we're scheming everything up, doing film for you did that hurt your feelings i mean it's it's once again like it it's all in the pursuit of winning you know like you can't get caught too much in your emotions and and try to go down that path like it's it's not personal it's just about winning and it also helps that i'm not the only one on our team that does it like it makes me feel a little bit better that I'm not just like the odd guy out that just has to show on every ball screen um that there are you know it's LeBron like there's other there's other people that can't guard him too like I'm not the only one um so that that feels better um but at the same time like it's just getting over the fact that like it's just about winning like when you look at it like that it's like you know some guys don't get asked to shoot threes and i and i do so that's not personal it's just about winning we're gonna get right back to the show the last thing you want to hear when you need your auto insurance most is a robot with countless irrelevant menu options which is why with usaa auto insurance you'll get great service that is easy and reliable all at the touch of a button get a quote today restrictions apply All right, back to part of my take. And now back to more Duncan Robinson.

Um, so... all at the touch of a button.
Get a quote today. Restrictions apply.
USAA. All right, back to part of my take.
And now back to more Duncan Robinson. So your name is Duncan Robinson.
How upset are your parents that you're not on the Spurs? They're not upset at all. I think a lot of people miss this one just basically in that like i was born pre tim duncan uh or yeah tim duncan david robinson era so that it just doesn't line up but with that being said it would make for a great story if i were to be um on the spurs yeah um but you know it's just how it works out just know, we're going to take that completely out of context,

that quote that you just said.

So Duncan Robinson demands trade to San Antonio.

Yeah.

Yeah, definitely not demanding a trade anywhere.

I'm very happy where I'm at.

How hated would you have been if you were a four-year starter at Duke?

The answer is very hated, by the way.

Just your face and your name probably not up there with like the jj reddick and grace and allen mostly just because i probably wouldn't have had like their statistical resume like you got to remember those guys are hated because of how great they were like they were great college players yes there were some other things thrown in there. well you know whatever um so i think i would have been like a couple tears below it maybe like a john shire i think he was kind of hated as well so maybe somewhere threshold he was he wasn't so much hated as he was like punchable like you just wanted to hit him and bully him a little bit i get i get that a lot though i get

the punchable face a lot i don't know i don't know if you guys have any insight into this

what makes a face punchable because clearly mine seems to be to the general public it's long you

have a long face not like in a bad way you're a good looking dude i can say that we're pumping

each other up in 2021 but i think there's like enough there's enough face there you know i mean

i think you've got a good haircut now but i can tell that you used to not have a good haircut

so I would have liked to punch you like

Thank you. 21 but i think there's like enough there's enough face there you know i mean i think you've got a good haircut now but i can tell that you used to not have a good haircut so i would have liked to punch you like maybe five years ago there yeah that's reason yeah i i mean i i agree with the long face i i get made fun of a lot because i have a big head um i think it's like low-hanging fruit of a joke but if people want to make it that's fine yeah no i again you're a good-looking dude but it's like whenever i think of punchable faces people with tiny faces you don't want to punch because you might miss yeah but isn't there also the downside of like a bigger head potentially like then hurting your hand yeah true you got a lot of head yeah you punch back not always that's right right um i so we're we're good friends with mark titus and the story came out.
I think he tweeted out in September that when you were at Michigan, you hit him up being like, hey, wondering if I can get some career advice because you thought that you didn't have a career in the NBA. So, one, I want to know, like, was that real? Were you actually like, this is over, I'm going to be a media person? And then, two, I'm looking at like was that real were you actually like this is over I'm going to be a media person and then two I'm looking at the text right now you text like a crazy person what was the breakup in these texts is mid-sentence that you'd start a new text yeah so once again I think that got taken out of context a little bit um I mean I'm reading that that's Yeah.
Well, the first part of your statement, the crazy part of that I'll address later. The first part being in that it was actually for a class.
We were supposed to like, it was for a career planning class. So, you know, I was a sport management major and we're in class and we have to reach out to somebody in our field who we, you know, feel that we might be interested in.
So it's not like I could interview whatever JJ Redick, like that it just wouldn't have flown. So I reached out to Mark just because I'd listened to some of this stuff and I had a mutual connection.
And, but at that point, like it was something that I was potentially interested in at that point i was definitely not like a surefire nba player um but it was something to to just kind of check the box and maybe have it in the back pocket uh in terms of the the text i don't remember the exact formatting of the text uh i certainly didn't think that it would be under like public scrutiny at this point i thought it was just kind of between us but uh i understand that's how the world works where just everything is uh open to the general public okay the media runs with everything mark was big media like mark titus yeah he was cloud chasing you we can just say it right now he was straight up cloud chasing you and it's fucked up what he did i don't think so because mark and i are legitimately friends so uh with that being said, I don't mind. It's different if it was like some random person who was just kind of like being opportunistic in the moment and trying to go viral or whatever.
But he was legitimately just posting. Like him and I have constant communication now.
So it was fine for me. I actually am realizing it right now.
I put it together. So so if you read it if you look at the the text they're like broken up each in the middle of a sentence a new paragraph you know what it is titus was like the longest oh i'm an android dude i'm a fucking hipster i'm not i'm not gonna be an apple guy like i'm not gonna let all you guys tell me what to buy and he recently became an iphone like six months ago.
So I bet that's why the texts come through like that. I figured it out.
I totally sent it as one. Okay.
The formatting got screwed up on his cricket wireless pay as you go special. So not only is he a clout chaser, but he made you look bad.
So he's really just a shithead. I don't think so.
He's a good friend good friend of ours let me ask you this would you ever take a screenshot of one of his text messages like where maybe he came off a little bit thirsty and then uh publicize it on the internet and tell everybody about it well you know we have we have different jobs like he's in the the media sphere so people want to see like he's responsible for producing content. I'm responsible for playing basketball.

So I think that's... Put that on a quote for Mark Titus.

It's true. You're right.

He's one of us blog boys.

And you're out there actually making millions

shooting hoops. His dream.

You're the man in the fucking arena.

I love it. Put a jersey on, Mark.

Put a jersey on.. Put a jersey on.

Mark wore a jersey.

In fairness, he's a good college player.

Yeah, yeah.

He's like a big ass baggy white t-shirt.

He made a complete joke of the competition

trying not to touch the ball. It's a farce.

We actually do love Mark. Yeah, we do.
We can say all this stuff

and you're allowed to call him a shithead too if you'd like to.

I'm good. Mark's a good guy.

I'm a fan. He's having me on his show

I'll see you next time. we actually do love Mark so we can say all this stuff and you're allowed to call him a shithead too if you'd like to I'm good Mark's a good guy I'm a fan he's had me on his show multiple times I hope to have him on mine so you know we're all good one of my fantasies is if I was ever that good at basketball and had you know a sick three point shot it would be to just roll up to some random pick up game or like an outside game dressed like a complete nerd and like sandbag the shit out of him and then in the game i just start making it rain on him and put up like 50 60 points like non-stop nobody could guard me have you ever done that have or has the thought ever occurred to you like that would be pretty cool if i could just show up to like lifetime fitness wearing, you know, the shortest bike shorts possible, like an old school Looney Tunes t-shirt and then just stay on the court for like six hours at a time.
You know, I've thought about doing that. The problem is that I'm like 6'7", 6'8".
So any like random basketball game I'm by far still the tallest player there. And that alone separates me.
You know what I mean? So it's hard for me to totally lean into the Billy Hoyle, white men can't jump type of thing. Just because if I was like 5'10", or 5'11", then it would be different because I would just kind of blend in.
But I still stick out just in that regard. Yeah.
We were at the national championship game, Villanova-Michigan. How much did that suck? Oh, that was tough, man.
It was. Villanova was tough.
There are not a lot of games that I have deep-rooted regret about, but that is certainly one of them. I mean, I just laid an egg, and we laid an egg as a team.
They were really good, obviously, and they played great, but that was tough. I was going to say, you shouldn't regret that.
That was – Villanova was just incredible. It was the Dante game.
Dante couldn't miss. We were in the stadium, which is the worst stadium ever to watch a basketball game in San Antonio.
I don't know how they have Final Fours there, but it wasn't your fault. It wasn't Michigan's fault.
Villanova was a fucking wagon, and they just came out and blitzed you guys. Yeah, no, they were tough, and they were playing really well at the right time.
More so for myself, like a personal standpoint of, I just didn't play well that game. So, you know, your last college game game you want to just leave a little bit more of an impact and we actually we made a run in the second half you probably don't remember this maybe we all thought it was more of a run than it actually was uh to get it like right around like 11 or 12 where it's like you know if you make a run from there and you get it's like five or six and it kind of gets interesting but we just weren't able to to get it to that point no we do remember because we all bet big on villanova so when you made a mini baby run we're like wait is this and they're like nah just kidding this is the easiest bet ever so you had so you had absolutely no faith is what i'm no none no we were we were fucking high five heavily leveraged on when they started whapping threes like right from the get-go we're like this is awesome well i thought there'd at thought there would at least be some Big Ten loyalty there now.
Yeah, I mean, if you guys had won, I would have just flipped it and been like, yeah, Big Ten. And I shouldn't have brought this up because now you can mention we're taping this right after Michigan had like, what was it, 46-3 run on Wisconsin? I've never seen anything like it.
Yeah, that was – I didn't get to watch because we played last night, but I watched the highlights and uh man michigan looks tough right now oh oh actually this is uh an appropriate question for that so you were when you were a senior at michigan how old were you were you 23 24 i was 23 uh for the whole season and then i turned 24 in april after the year okay so wisconsin's very old team wise they have like a lot of older guys is it can you be too old in college like is that a thing no i don't think that's a thing um i think that it's really like the the young teams early on that struggle but like you know a team like wisconsin when you have that age and experience particularly early on is when you're going to be really good because you just have that as such an advantage and then as teams grow and learn and start to figure things out over the year, I think that becomes less and less of an advantage. But I mean, Wisconsin is obviously tough, but Michigan just had a role in last night.
Yeah, they're awesome. I do.
I am going to use that though. The two old in college line and just be like joints are getting achy.
You're playing against 19 year old arthritis, a ton of, you know, bounce. know bounce and what are you gonna do have you ever thought about faking your birth certificate and saying that you're a couple years younger like they do in baseball sometimes you know i think that that would do wonders for my career i think unfortunately now that the kind of verdict is out that i'm 26 and in my third year which is incredibly old um but if i could retroactively go back and make that happen, I think that would really be advantageous to my playing career.
Was that kind of strange getting to the NBA and you're a rookie? Yeah, but you're three years older, four years older than the other rookies that are there. Is there a big age gap at that point between someone who's 24 as a professional and someone who's 20? The weirdest part of it was being a rookie at 24 and having like our leader or one of our leaders, Bam, being 22.

And like me being one of the young guys, but being 24 and Bam being like our captain at 22.

Like it was just kind of like demoralizing in that sense. But you also always have to have the perspective and like remind yourself like you know what i'm just running my own race over here you know just like blinders on just stay locked in uh our intern billy football is like dying to talk to you so i think you you you listen to the show so i think you knew what we were talking about at the start of the show we were talking about will Williams I think most people picked up on that but Billy is essentially the Duncan Rob it's like remember those old commercials like this is your brain this is your brain on drugs it's like this is your brain Duncan Robinson whapping threes in the NBA this is your brain on drugs Billy football sitting on a broken couch with us idiots as an intern that's pretty much the difference the.
The two roads have divided Williams College, what you could be, and what if you just fail at everything, you'd end up. But that's Billy football.
That's my introduction. Winning at the highest level.
Quickly. Billy is winning at the highest level.
He's looking forward to a fight against Jose Canseco. Billy's dominating life right now.
You did know we were talking about Billy, right? You did, right? Yeah. Okay, good.
I will say, though, I will say Billy's crush. I mean, he's an intern for basically the biggest podcast in America.
I don't know how he could be doing much better than that. That's true.
He's winning at life. He's winning at life.
Quick question, Dougan. Do you know that you probably are the only person in history to lose in a D3 championship against Wisconsin Whitewater, a D1 championship, and an NBA final? Damn.
Probably the only person in history. Brutal.
Is there a question? No, that wasn't a question. It's kind of crazy, but it's just awesome.
That's not a question, though. That's not an awesome or a question.
Why don't you be polite to our guest? Duncan, go ahead. Well, I'm just confused as to how you would think that I wouldn't know that.
Every single day of my life acknowledging the fact that I've made it to the championship at all three levels and lost. Well, that is the real question was, that's literally what keeps me going.
Yeah. Which was the worst.
I would probably, I mean, it's really hard to, yeah, I will say like the, the Michigan one hurt, but we, as we alluded to earlier, like that game was pretty much over with 10 minutes to go um the wisconsin one was we won like we were going to win four seconds on the clock i miss a shot our big man tips it in like the game's over like we're gonna win i'm thinking to myself running back on defense we just won a national championship and the kid goes the length of the floor in two point whatever seconds and scores with the buzzer so that one one, like just the change of emotions to lose in that way,

that one was like crushing for sure.

So a lot of people are saying that, you know,

Mike Meyer should have taken that shot at the Wisconsin Whitewater.

We open every show by talking about it.

It's an all-time what-if moment.

A lot of people think that you may have not been able to, you able to do a D3, the rigors of a D3 schedule. Class, athletics, it might have been a little too much, and that's why you had to go D1 with a lot more funding and stuff.
Anyway, huge fan, and just wanted to know if you could retweet EF Sports because they always tweet about you, and they've just been trying to get your attention. But, you know, if you could.
Thank you. I got you, man.
I'm not super active on Twitter, but I'll be sure to do that, man. I got you.
Dick Quinn is great to meet you. Great to meet you.
Brutal question. Yeah, brutal question.
Absolutely. Just terrible questions.
Here's my last question. We like to do this.
So, Dungan Robinson has a podcast. Everyone should listen to it.
It's out now. It's called The Long Shot.
It's under the JJ Redick 342 Productions. So we do the people also ask on Google.
If you just type in your name, like what do they also ask? The top question is, is Duncan Robinson good? That's the question people wondering care to discuss I think that I think that's a fair question uh you know particularly with kind of the the fact that I kind of came onto the scene last year I think there's probably a lot of people out there that would argue that I'm I'm not that good um but you know I'm more concerned with the the people in my corner who uh who do believe in me and you know i try not to get too caught up in in that sort of stuff but it's it's certainly a fair question that i think warrants asking clearly i mean that's what the public want to know i think it's i think you're good the actual like someone it must be a blog or something but they're like duncan robinson is good so i'm looking at this one answer right here and it said duncan robinson is a six foot eight flamet out of Michigan. Are you a flamethrower? That's pretty fucking cool.
That's a title I haven't leaned into fully, but I'll take it. I think that's a good idea for the tattoo.
Get flames on your right arm. And then you hit a 3.
You lose me there with the right arm, though. I'm not touching the right arm.
The right arm needs to be preserved at all costs. Strictly for the buckets.
All right, well, the left arm, get flames on it. You hold up the left, and you do the number three when you hit a shot.
You've got a bucket on your team, Tyler Hero, and you've got a flamethrower on the team. You can't beat that.
That could work. That could work.
Do you guys, you guys my last last question i forgot to ask this do you guys uh play better in the uh city uniforms do you think um i would probably say no uh i don't really think it makes a difference my first year though there was a legitimate conspiracy that the city uniforms were like cursed or bad.

Whatever you want to call it.

We could not win to the point where we actually we called the league and changed like on a last second notice.

Like we're not going to win.

So you just contradicted yourself, though, because when you're like, it doesn't matter.

I think it does matter.

And then you just prove that it does matter because you guys suck. But it's it a that's two years ago there's a new year the energy has shifted the city uniforms are no longer what they once were they're different colors everything's changed the courts changed with it it's totally a different experience you can't project that former experience onto these new jerseys i've been unfair is it easier to shoot in an empty arena? Like I know the bubble was different because it wasn't arena, but what is it like shooting in an arena with no fans? It's easier.
If anything, I'd probably say it's harder. Not like ridiculously harder, but it's just strange.
Like having such a giant arena, 18,000-person arena, and just have it be dead silent and empty is weird um so that's been an adjustment the bubble was nice because we were shooting in empty arenas but they were made to be empty arenas you know there's a tight backdrop there were the fake fans and everything so it didn't feel like you were in this giant place but the empty arenas have definitely been an adjustment my last question is how cool is Pat Riley? So cool.

He just brings it

every time you see him.

The slick back hair,

just the aura.

It precedes him, and he

lives up to it fully.

Super fortunate

to learn from him and

just be in his organization, because he

is truly the godfather. He's just the coolest.
He's just, he's always been the coolest. Yeah.
Billy, you got one last question. Go ahead.
Sorry if I was coming off as a dick. I was texting some of your former teammates and they wanted me to bust your balls.
So what don't, I was really, that's the excuse you're going with. If you're going to be a dick, don't apologize for me.
dick. Own it.
I'm a dick, sorry. Who are you texting with? Tell Duncan so he can at least...
Some of his former teammates. Say their names.
I want to hear names, yeah. I will not reveal my sources.
No, say what are their names. Come on, Billy.
Never mind. No, come on.
I'm not going to expose them like that. Are you still friends with those guys? I don't know who he's talking about.
I'm still good friends with a handful of people from Williams, but that's why I'm very, very curious to see who he's talking about. Okay, so one thing that you need to learn about Billy is he's also a liar.
No, no, no. So he's probably not texting with anybody from Williams, and that's why he's saying I'm not going to give up my sources because Billy would absolutely give up his sources in a heartbeat if he thought he was in trouble.
All right, so here's what we're going to do. We're going to end the interview, and he's going to tell you right after we end it.
So, Duncan, thank you very much for joining us. Everyone go download the long shot.
Best of luck in the podcast world. It's been fun.
You also are now a recurring guest, so you have to come on any time we ask. And also have to bring Jimmy Butler next time.
But we appreciate it, man.

It was good talking to you.

I appreciate it.

Thanks for having me on.

Always been a big fan of the show.

So an honor to be included.

Thank you.

Thank you.

And now, Billy, you can we'll cut this part, but go ahead.

Tell him.

No, you're not going to.

Yes, we are.

We're going to cut it.

We'll cut it.

Billy, what do we got?

Billy, just tell him.

It was some guys.

It was some guys who had been like, you know, freshmen, sophomores when he was a senior. Just say their names.
Shout out. I don't actually know.
I never played with them, but I know. Billy oversold his connections to your teammates.
Shocker. Duncan Robinson was brought to you by our great friends.
We're going to get right back to the show. The last thing you want to hear when you need your auto insurance most is a robot with countless irrelevant menu options, which is why with USAA Auto Insurance, you'll get great service that is easy and reliable all at the touch of a button.
Get a quote today. Restrictions apply.
USAA. All right.
Back to part of my take. Okay, let's finish up.
We got guys on chicks.

Hank.

A couple FAQs as well, a little mix and mash.

Mix and mash.

Here we go.

Hey, guys.

My last semester of college started today,

and I just wanted to say thanks for making the past four-plus years of my life a lot funnier.

I don't really have a job lined up yet currently,

and I don't really know what I want to do. I was wondering if you guys had any advice.
OnlyFans. OnlyFans.
OnlyFans is saturated with girls right now. That's what I read, that there are too many that have logged on, which is making it tough on the early adopters of it.
Yeah. But I feel like there's probably still a market for dudes.
Yeah, OnlyFans or Twitch streamer. Right? Yeah.
That also feels like it's early. Start playing more video games.
Cryptofinanceer. Or miner.
Or miner. Crypto mining.
Yeah. What do you have to do to get a crypto mine set up? If you have to ask, you can't afford it.
Move to San Francisco. Slash I don't understand it at all.
Move to Chile. Yeah.
Do the boys ever miss blogging as much as the old days? Love the show. Yes, I do.
I very much miss blogging. A lot.
I used to blog. I mean, in the old, old days, it was my only job.
We would blog 12 times a day. So being locked in on the internet like that was a lot of fun.
I miss it a lot. I very much miss the Monday Morning Bower Movement.
I used to love writing that column, but I can't anymore because of time, obviously. But I think we both kind of feel that blogging things and being forced to write things makes you think about it more in a way that would prepare you to talk about it.
Absolutely. So I miss doing that a lot.
I think I'm going to get back into the blog game, though, once football season's over. I am not going to make any...
There have been discussions. Yeah, I'm not going to make any promises I can't promises I can't keep.
So I will not be getting. Yeah, this is like it's something you have to be locked into.
Correct. You have to really be like locked in.
Otherwise, it's not something you can just come and go. Right.
That's the that when it like back in the day, it was literally wake up, take Stella out, grab a cup of coffee, sit at my computer for eight hours straight and like read everything that comes across every joke, every story, everything. And like when you would go away for two hours, you felt like you missed a year on the Internet.
The Internet's a weird thing like that. If you if you like don't look at the Internet for four hours, you feel like you missed 10 years.
But if you don't look at the Internet for a week you feel like you missed absolutely nothing how long do you think you could go right now without using the internet at all for anything the rest of my life no on vacation no netflix oh no no scrolling on your phone none none if i'm in if i'm somewhere tropical zero zero days zero zero seconds hours seconds 10 days 10 days if i'm days. 10 days? That's vacation.
Yeah. Yeah.
Totally checked out. My body is already drained.
You actually do that every time you go on vacation, and we need anything from you. That's what you need to do when you're on vacation.
You need to unwind. My favorite part of when Hank goes on vacation is when we toss something into a show, and then six days later, we'll hear Hank.
We'll get a text being like, hey, just listen to the show. Yeah.
I will not be vacation shamed. My husband is addicted to nicotine pouches.
These small white nicotine vessels have become the bane of my existence. Not only is it incredibly unattractive to see the pouch bulging out of his mouth, but he has developed a concerning habit of leaving used pouches throughout our home.
Gross. There is no rhyme or reason to where he places them.
No room is safe. Oftentimes I find them unfl in the toilet littered across his bedside table or in the side compartment of the car door even worse our seven-month-old puppy and 16-month-old son have become obsessed with finding the aforementioned pouches and putting them in their mouths if my son sees a container on the ground that's bad he picks it up and hands it to his dad at this point he's enabling the addiction how can i convince my husband to quit i am begging you to read this on the show as i know he'll be listening and he responds well to public shaming okay listen dude you're gross uh the actually dipping nicotine pouches not tobacco i'm not going to shame that leaving them out is a fucking psycho move leaving them out for your son is beyond psycho move you're gross fix it just dude dip like respons.
Don't do it in front of your kid. Don't leave it around your house.
And also, for the wife, you should just start leaving your tampons everywhere and be like, oh, we're just leaving shit out, so here it is. I think that's a fair compromise.
It sounds like he's not doing the dip and the spit. It's just the white pouches.
So it's really weird for him to just take something out of his mouth and put it on a desk. That's crazy.
Yeah. That's a crazy move.
The only thing crazier is leaving an unopened Mountain Dew, full Mountain Dew bottle. That'd be disgusting.
With a dip in it. And if that's the case, leave his ass.
But I have a suggestion. This might be a little too nuts.
Just get a trash can. Just put a trash can in rooms.
Yeah, everywhere. Just have them put...
Get the biggest trash can you can get. Yeah.
That's my dream house, is having a dumpster in my kitchen. No, here's what you do.
Then you never have to take out the trash. Here's what you do.
Spot the problem. Just put trash cans in every room and have the little basketball hoop above the trash can.
Yes. And then it's a game for him.
Yep. And then every time he makes a shot, you'll have to applaud for him and cheer.
Yep. Like, life is going well for me, but I do sometimes think about how sweet life was when I was in college and I just had two outside garbage cans inside.
Because I only had to take out the trash once every two weeks. And that was incredible.
Sometimes there was actually a little, there was a phase there where we didn't even have trash bags now that i'm thinking about it that's really fucking i used to push mine on the porch and we'd have a controlled burn we got in trouble damn it yeah those are the days lately immediately after my boyfriend comes he starts humming the riff to seven nation army by the white stripes i've asked him to stop but he insists that is instinctive like a cat purring how do I get him to stop? Have him start doing it while you're fucking. That seems more like a during sex song than a post-coitus hymn.
Yeah. Is that the one? Yeah.
That's like a good stroke. Yeah, that's during.
That's not after. Yeah, after you need to chill out.
Actually, it's foreplay. That's like a kickoff song.
Like right as Kirk Herbstreet and Chris Fowler and we're live in Happy Valley. Then you're like, let's get it going.
That's what my concern is. Get them on something else.
Get them on the Fox NFL injury music. Yeah, eat her pussy and hum that.
Guaranteed come. Hey there, jumpsuit geniuses.
My boyfriend got drunk on Saturday night and got his ears pierced by some girl at a party. He really likes them for some reason, and I'm not sure if I should give them some time to grow on me or if I should tell them to take them out.
What? Got drunk and got... It's weird.
I feel like that was... He had sex with that girl.
And then he was like, the best way to pretend that we didn't have sex is let me pierce your ear because then that could be the story of how I know you. What's more intimate? Having sex with somebody inside of them or having a girl put something inside of you? His ears got pegged by this girl.
Yes. That's weird.
You got a weird boyfriend. No king shaming.
I've been to AWL since the Marlins Man foul ball guy episode. Whatever happened to the Saturday Let's Get Weird podcast? What made you guys do it in the first place? People forget.
I think we've told on this podcast, but before we moved to New York, I was living at home, and Marlins Man was so upset after that podcast like I remember being on the speaker phone my mom like laughing but he was like calling me like threatened to like sue me and like do all like he went he was very upset like initially after that episode came out yes yes I don't know why I don't know we three times a week is is a good amount of podcasts I think doing the fourth we're like wait, wait, what are we doing here? Also, we don't want to be that. There's some podcasts out there that chop up their show 17 different ways so that they can say they're number one.
Yeah, and on Saturdays, the average listenership would go down, but total downloads would go up. Right.
And that's kind of like, what are we doing here? We'd just rather be like, every time we put out Heat, a million people listen to it. It goes platinum every time.
With no features. Right.
That's what we do on Mondays. We're not trying to put out a bunch of fucking B-side singles and then be like, oh, but it's actually 200 million.
No, no. We put out platinum every time.
Bangers. No matter what.
That's just a fact. Part of my take is number one.
You think? Thanks know what, though? We don't brag because, you know what, when you get to a point where you just don't have to brag because the people know. The real people know.
Get ahead, stay ahead. Don't let everyone else try to tell you some other story.
Just know what it is and how it's been for basically five years. That's our speech.
It feels good to say that every now and then. It's like Buffalo Wild Wings being like, we sell the most food in America because we sell 48 chicken wings to every single table.
It does feel good every now and then to just be like, guess what, guys? This is what actually is the reality. All right.
We'll end with this little fun little Billy anecdote. Over the summer, my boyfriend DMed Billy asking to race,

and Billy basically called him a scrawny bitch.

Parentheses, which he is.

Don't read this out loud.

End parentheses.

He hasn't listened to PMT since.

How do I get him to start listening again?

Oh, no.

Wait, Billy called him a scrawny bitch?

Billy's off.

Billy's off the show.

We kicked Billy off the show after realizing they used profanity like that.

I DM people the same thing. Really? I would love to see that.
I was going to say something there that was actually going to cost us Billy, so I'm not going to say it. What I was going to say was if Billy Football costs us one listener, then we will fire Billy Football.
But then I'll get a bunch of tweets while being like, I haven't listened since Billy's on. It's like, well, how do you know? I'm not going to do that.
No, because then people are telling on themselves. Oh, true.
Got him. Let us know if you no longer listen because of Billy football.
Right. Okay.
Perfect. Got him.
Got him. Mousetrap.
All right. Nine.
I got to put some balls back in this thing so someone do an animal fact. 18.
Okay. Animal fact.
Looking it up right now. Animal fact.
Dogs left under the care of PFT Cometor put on 80 pounds of body weight per week. Elephants can't jump, so this is how they navigate through terrain.
Oh, that's a video. P.C., why'd you shave today? I think it's with your look.
I think it's for your whole life. I mean, I noticed.
No, it's a good question and a spare because I didn't mean to shave this much today. I gonna say you don't i got i got out of hand so i was trying to i was trying to trim myself up a little bit because the goatee at the bottom was a little long the patches on the sides were a little wavy tried to shave it it eventually just started to look like only the goatee by accident goatee and you're doing goatee week and so i didn't want to come into the office being like look at me i'm in go to you but i didn't want to do that so i'm like fuck it let's just go scorched earth and now i look like i'm a six-year-old yeah i mean it's i mean it would be the same if i shaved everyone would be like why'd you shave yeah so well i mean i think you're probably more well known for your facial hair than yeah i am yeah yes hank too.
Hank doesn't shave. Yeah, when Hank shaves, it is a sight.
Should we do a shaved face week? Fuck no. Like straight up shaved face.
Yeah, we should do face bald week. We should.
And just be like, these are the guys you actually are listening to. Disavow.
We're going to look so bad. I just grew my beard out because I was like lazy and then I shaved it and then I shaved it thinking it was something I could like it was like oh I'll just shave my face and then people were like horrified and I realized I could never I threw up it was like Teddy Bridgewater's knee I could never I'm just a beard guy now reports coming from Barstool HQ everyone keeps throwing It was terrible.
I walked in the office and I was like, oh my god. There's nothing worse than changing your look in any way and having everyone just have a really, really strong reaction.
Even if it's good, it still feels bad. And a nice way, too.
Like, why'd you shave the beard? Remember when chaps? I mean, I didn't even want to think about it. That was ridiculous.
That was actually like. On the World Series, no less.
That was a horrifying, horrifying couple weeks. You looked like an infected toe.
Oh, my God. I actually, ugh.
I don't even. We might have to cut that part because people are going to listen to that and then remember what he looked like.
Don't remember that. All right, here we go.
Numbers. Eight.
Nine. One hundred.
Eighteen. The extinct Colossus Penguin stood as tall as LeBron James.

Ninety-nine, actually. Ninety-nine, ninety-nine, ninety-nine.
Oh, man, if it's a hundred. Eight.
Fifty-nine. Have we had fifty-nine before? London Fletcher.
Stand by. First timer.
Rare. Love you guys.
All right. See you guys Friday.
It's a blue world without you. It's a blue world alone.
Shining away, I'll be coming for your love, okay?

Shining away, I'll be coming for your love, okay? Take on me, take me on I'll be gone

Good afternoon

Cheers I'll be gone In a day of tea All the things that you say Is in a light bulb Just to play my worries away You're all the things I've got to remember Me shying away I'll be coming for you. Take me on I'll be gone To the king I'll be

gone

in a day