NFL Week 14, Fastest 2 Minutes, Recapping Every Game And CFB Talk

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Speaker 7 On today's part of my take, week 14 of the NFL in the books. We recap every single game.
Got a lot to talk about. No buy weeks anymore, so we have a lot, a lot of games.

Speaker 7 We have a little college football talk. We've got baby brawn of the week, fastest two minutes, who's back back of the week.
Embrace it. We don't have many of these left.

Speaker 7 These Mondays, pardon my takes, my favorite ones in the world, we do not have many of these left. So embrace it, embrace it, embrace it.
Huge pack show coming at you in a minute.

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Speaker 7 Okay,

Speaker 7 let's go.

Speaker 7 Now in the streets, there is violence.

Speaker 7 And then I like to stop the query.

Speaker 7 Look at the handle, love washing,

Speaker 7 and then I can't live all on the sun. Oh, no, we're gonna rock down to Elen Trick Avenue,

Speaker 7 and then we'll take it higher.

Speaker 7 Oh, we're gonna rock down to Elen Trick Avenue.

Speaker 7 It's part of my take presented by Bar School Sports. Welcome to Part of My Take presented by the Cash App.
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Speaker 7 Today is Monday, December 14th, week 14.

Speaker 7 What?

Speaker 7 What?

Speaker 7 What?

Speaker 7 We start in Miami where Lincoln Park Bowdoin tried so hard and got so far. but in the end, it doesn't really matter as the Chiefs handled the Dolphins.

Speaker 7 With a temp hotter than normal, Travis Kelsey Kapoor showed off with 136 yards and a touchdown.

Speaker 7 Tyron Machu was taking all necessary safety measures because he might get sicky, and we're in the midst of a global panty, folks. Chiefs, 33, Dolphins, 27.

Speaker 7 In Carolina, where Drew Locke brought his baking soda because he realized all he needed to throw TDs was his arm and hammer.

Speaker 7 This Broncos season has stunk, but days like today put a little Troy Perfumagale on the product in Denver. Pharaoh Cooper vs.

Speaker 7 Wade aborted his routes as Matt Rule was given it the old college trimester. It might be time to cut the cord on the Panther season.
Whoa, boom, that's not an umbilical cord, that's Teddy's pee-pee.

Speaker 7 Some hog, and the Broncos are back in the wincome: 32-27.

Speaker 7 Down to Jacksonville, where Tractor Cito, December is his favorito, exposed the D like they're wearing Speedos, Tractor Sito, had two scores and 200 plus yards, and Ryan Black and Tannehill look halfway stout against an ailing Jaguars defense.

Speaker 7 Doug Marone Roan row your boat and gambled like he was playing a crazy game of poker, but he's up the river without an oar.

Speaker 7 OAR that is your best ability is ray ability and Mike has the Titans posed for another playoff run run as they dominate the Jaguars. 31-10.
What?

Speaker 7 What?

Speaker 7 Staying in Florida, where Ronald Jones and me saw a lot of touches, and Brady was counting throws as Adam Derwitz-Thielen gave the Vikings another sell

Speaker 7 loss. And it'll be another long December for Minnesota fans.
Dave Matthews, Dan Bailey, crashed and burned as he couldn't find the space between the uprights.

Speaker 7 And punter great Breton Colquet has the Vikings Brexiting from the playoff race. Bucs 26, the Vikings forking.

Speaker 7 In Cincinnati, where Bran the Broken Allen was unable to use his legs, and in a touching tribute to Cersei and Jamie Lannister, the Bengals have graduated from kissing their sisters in ties to losing outright.

Speaker 7 Alden, Smith, and Wesson dominated the Bengals shotgun, returning a fumble for six, and Candy Dalton to Pa Lard ruined the Bengals' already fat chance of winning a game. America's team 30, Bengals 7.

Speaker 7 To Las Vegas, where, in a touching tribute to my good friend Ted Kennedy, the Raiders started with a few negligent drives leading to a car getting sunk by the rivers.

Speaker 7 As a quarterback stooled in the desert, T.Y. Axis Hilton and Zach Pasquale's Triangle were extremely coefficient, taking all the right angles.
And that's a good sign for Frank Reichangel's offense.

Speaker 7 Talking math, boom. Jonathanos Taylor snapped off 150 yards and two scores in a Colts route.
Coach 44, the

Speaker 7 Sabbath.

Speaker 7 In New York, where Dan Connor, Tom Arnold, rose and caught a touchdown, resulting in the cancellation of the Giants season, taking one too many.

Speaker 7 And Grambian, Billy Dre, Cyrus, Kirpatrick, Gabe, Giants fans, Kenyon Drakey, Breaky Hart, wondering if Colt McCoy is a one-hit wonder.

Speaker 7 And it's bad times for the G-Men as they lose a must-win to the Cardinals 26-7.

Speaker 7 The G-Men in Arizona, where the Washington football team played the 49ers?

Speaker 7 Arizona?

Speaker 7 The desert?

Speaker 7 Martez sweat, baby sweat, said you and JD. McKissick ain't nothing but mammals.
Let's bend the Niners over like it's the Discovery Channel.

Speaker 7 Chase Young Sheldon exploded into a big bang, making Nick Mullins look like a solar system QB.

Speaker 7 Galaxy Brain Boom. The Washington football team takes a commanding lead in the NFC beast with a 23-50-win.

Speaker 7 Up to the windy city. Where Deshaun Williams Scott Watson asked, dude, where's Moirkor?

Speaker 7 As Mitch Trubisky was finally playing like a guy who drove a 1997 Toyota Camry in his pre-draft interviews, Larry David Montgomery was pretty, pretty, pretty good, running for an 80-yard touchdown.

Speaker 7 And Jimmy Hoffa Graham was a great teamster, burying the Texans with a second-half touchdown.

Speaker 7 The Texans are finishing out the stretch, and unfortunately, Romeo must die as Billy Shakespeare O'Brien will take him out in a double coach suicide. Bears 36, Texans 7.

Speaker 7 Standing on a corner, Jameis Winston down in Nola, such a fine sight to see.

Speaker 7 It's Jalen Hurt so good, and he hurts so good. And New Orleans, we need to score, please.

Speaker 7 No,

Speaker 7 we didn't write the other part of Hurt So Good. Let's do that again.
Let's just say Hurt So Good a third time. Okay.
All right, ready? Here we go.

Speaker 7 Standing on a corner, Jameis Winston down in in Nola. Such a fine sight to see.

Speaker 7 It's Jaylin hurt so good. And he hurts so good.
And he hurts so good. You hurt so good.
Come on, you all.

Speaker 7 We need to score.

Speaker 7 Put Jameis in. We don't need to see more

Speaker 7 screens.

Speaker 7 I forgot to write the rats of that team.

Speaker 9 It's a secret second verse pulled.

Speaker 7 Ah, Eagles, offset the Saints.

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Speaker 7 Okay, let's do it. Week 14, and the Pittsburgh Steelers are

Speaker 7 the worst

Speaker 9 11 and 2 team of all time. Frauds.

Speaker 7 Frauds was the word I was going to use.

Speaker 9 Well, either that, it's a combination. they're fraudulent

Speaker 7 it hurts me because I love

Speaker 9 okay they're not they're not fraudulent because like

Speaker 7 injuries have obviously had a big thing to do with their defense right but they're they can't run the football well if if if I'm going to be fair because I've called the Ravens frauds and I like the Steelers I'm like for some reason I always love the Steelers I love the city of Pittsburgh but if we're being fair That's a fraudulent 11-2.

Speaker 7 That is a team that you do not feel good about when it comes to December football going into January. Let's just say they're not peaking at the right time because that first half was close.
And

Speaker 7 it actually, I know no game comes down to one play, but it really did come back down to that pick six because the Steelers defense was kind of having their way with the Bills in the first half.

Speaker 7 Big Ben throws the pick six to end the first half. The Bills go in with the lead, and then Josh Allen and the Bills' offense kind of take over

Speaker 7 and beat the Steelers pretty soundly in the second half. So I'm sitting here being like,

Speaker 7 what are the Steelers? We'll get to the Bills in a second.

Speaker 9 So, yeah, the Steelers, they're kind of who we thought they were going to be. Because if you look at their start of the year schedule, you remember they played like nobody.

Speaker 9 They beat the Ravens once and the Titans once, and that's about it. But obviously, like, injuries have had a lot to do with it.
They're not great running the ball.

Speaker 9 They stink running the ball, in fact.

Speaker 9 So I think that a lot of Pittsburgh would actually agree with us saying that, yeah, they're not, this isn't a classic Pittsburgh Steelers team because they're fun on offense occasionally, but when it comes down to it, I'll put it this way.

Speaker 9 If it's fourth and three,

Speaker 9 do you trust your football team to get three yards? Do you trust the Steelers to do it in a short yard? Because I don't think that they have a running game to speak of. Right.

Speaker 9 It's just basically like, we've got... We've got Mapletron,

Speaker 9 we've got Juju, and we can throw the game.

Speaker 9 We can do some nice things in the passing game. But this isn't like classic Stillers football, you know?

Speaker 7 No, and Big Ben was not good. And you need Big Ben to be good because there have been times where he has not been good and the defense has kind of

Speaker 7 made him look okay with the end result. But he wasn't good tonight.
And

Speaker 7 I don't know. This is,

Speaker 7 I hate to say this. I don't want to say it.
But are we getting to the end with Big Ben? That's my question.

Speaker 9 His pump fakes were pretty hilarious tonight. I love Ben's pump fakes because people give him a lot of credit for him and say that he's one of the best at doing it.

Speaker 9 I don't think Big Ben is actually pump faking. I think he just changes his mind at the last second.
Correct. So he's fooling him.

Speaker 9 You're seeing Big Ben's brain make a live reaction to what he's seeing through his eyes. He's not thinking, like, I'm going to fake this pass and really get these guys to bite.

Speaker 9 He's just like, oh, shit, that guy might pick it off. I better not toss it.

Speaker 7 And

Speaker 7 to maybe walk back that a little bit, it might not be as much that Big Ben is coming to the end, but without that running game, which they have none of, I mean, James Conner, they ran the ball 10 times, he ran the ball 10 times for 18 yards tonight.

Speaker 7 Like, the Buffalo Bills' defense has turned a corner, but if you can't run the ball at all, Big Ben is kind of exposed a little bit. You can't expect, like, the Steelers have a formula.

Speaker 7 They have a way to win football games.

Speaker 7 They have an unbelievable defense, and if they can figure out a way to get a little bit of a running game, Big Ben throwing the ball 30 times is right about what you need, not 40 not 50 so i don't know i don't know what to make of the steelers other than they're just not good right now the last two games and on top of that pft

Speaker 7 a little look ahead a little look ahead for you so they play the bengals on monday night football which will you'll you'll hear a little time travel because we actually came to that uh revelation in a minute They play the Colts, which will be a tough game, especially a Colts team that is starting to play a little bit better right now.

Speaker 7 They handle the Raiders.

Speaker 7 If the Browns can win a couple games here, the Browns can win the division.

Speaker 9 I was looking at that.

Speaker 7 Week 17, the Browns and the Steelers could play for the division.

Speaker 7 Could you imagine how much fun that would be?

Speaker 9 If the Browns win tonight, Monday night, then yeah,

Speaker 9 they've got an easy schedule.

Speaker 9 Well, they're going to the Giants.

Speaker 9 It's not a gimme. It's a tough game.
And then after that, they're going at the Jets. They're just basically living in New Jersey for the next couple weeks.

Speaker 9 And then, yeah, it would be against the Steelers at home in Cleveland

Speaker 9 for the AFC.

Speaker 7 Could you imagine that also would be a game, and I hate to say this for Browns fans, but if the Steelers and the Browns play for the division in week 17, the Steelers are winning.

Speaker 7 A hundred times out of a hundred times. The Steelers are going to win that game.
A hundred times out of a hundred times. So, yeah, I don't really know what to make of the Steelers.

Speaker 7 I mean, listen, they're going to make the playoffs. They will, if they win the division, let's say they finish 13 and three.
They'll get the two seed.

Speaker 7 They'll probably have a decent chance to win their first game. Who knows what happens after that?

Speaker 7 But what we really really need to talk about is the Bills being for real, for real, because they are the opposite of the Steelers in that they are peaking at the right time.

Speaker 7 They are starting to play their best football right now. Their defense is starting to look very good, starting to come back together.
Their offense has looked

Speaker 7 good all season, but it all is starting to come to fruition for Buffalo since that two-game stretch where they played the weird Tuesday night game against the Titans and they got killed, and then they played the Chiefs on like a Monday afternoon and got and got beat pretty soundly.

Speaker 7 They have won

Speaker 7 every game except the Kyler Murray Hail Mary and they've done it pretty well like convincingly and they beaten some good teams in there. They beaten the Patriots.
They beaten the Seahawks. They

Speaker 7 the 49ers, the Steelers tonight. The Bills are starting to put it all together and the Bills I feel like are the team that can beat the Chiefs.

Speaker 7 They're not going to, but I feel like

Speaker 9 if everything goes right, they're the team that can beat the Chiefs.

Speaker 7 They're the one team where you literally say to yourself, okay, they got something here where

Speaker 9 they need Josh Allen to play his perfect game. They need their defense to play their perfect game.

Speaker 9 They need Tredavius White to intercept Patrick Mahomes twice, who, by the way, Tredavius White, great suggestion saying that the Buffalo Bills should have a live Buffalo, that they grow themselves in the stadium.

Speaker 9 That's his words, not mine. They grow their own Buffalo, and and then it just roams the sidelines.
Love it.

Speaker 9 I cannot agree with that more vociferously.

Speaker 9 The Bills with a live mascot would be a great team. So, yes, I agree.
They could potentially beat the Chiefs.

Speaker 9 Probably won't, but they could do it.

Speaker 7 I just love the, man. This is so sad that the Bills don't have fans because this is such a fun Bills team, and they're starting

Speaker 7 to play well, late down the stretch. They're going to win the AFC East.
Like, this is, fuck, man.

Speaker 7 Yes, Buffalo. Way to go, Buffalo.
Yeah. Way to go.
Way to go, Josh Allen. Way to go, Buffalo.
Fucking love it. You love to see it.

Speaker 9 There was a little bit of snow tonight. Yep.
But you're right. It's not the same.

Speaker 9 If snow falls in Orchard Park and there's not Bills Mafia there to piss their name into it, did it really happen?

Speaker 9 In a way, no.

Speaker 7 And I'm reading this right now: as Buffalo Bills dominate Pittsburgh Steelers, join AFC's elite tier of teams.

Speaker 9 Let's go.

Speaker 7 Let's go, Buffalo. So,

Speaker 9 who's in that elite tier?

Speaker 7 Chiefs click. It would be the Chiefs, probably the Steelers still.
And then,

Speaker 9 yeah, that's about it. Chiefs and the Bills.

Speaker 7 I don't know who else would be in that tier. But yeah,

Speaker 7 that was a statement win for the Bills, which I feel like the Bills get a lot of statement wins now because they had such a bad stretch so many years.

Speaker 9 Well, yeah, it's always kind of like shocking to realize that the Bills are legit. Yes, but they're legit.
They're definitely.

Speaker 7 They are legit, folks.

Speaker 9 What is this game? For real, for real. They play on.

Speaker 7 Yeah, they play Saturday.

Speaker 9 They play on Saturday.

Speaker 7 It's so stupid.

Speaker 9 It's at 4.30 in the afternoon.

Speaker 7 The NFL is going up against Conference Championship Saturday, and I fucking hate it.

Speaker 9 So they're playing in Denver, which Josh Allen might throw the ball out of the entire state of Colorado. Correct.
So that'll be something fun to watch. Correct.
But yeah, it's Saturday at 4.30.

Speaker 9 And then just a little reminder here. There will be a game on Christmas.
Yeah. On Friday.

Speaker 7 And three games that Saturday.

Speaker 7 This isn't. Three games that Saturday as well.

Speaker 9 I feel like we're just getting bukake with football.

Speaker 7 Yeah, I don't know what's going to happen. We're going to hit it from all angles.
I don't know what's going to happen with the Bulls schedule, but at least we have these spread out games.

Speaker 7 But yeah, so that was Sunday night football. The Bills dominate the Steelers.
Steelers, question marks all around.

Speaker 7 I don't know. Can they get healthy? Their defense is still good.
And it's just like...

Speaker 7 You got to find a way to run the ball because Big Bang can't do it on himself.

Speaker 9 Collinsworth was trending tonight.

Speaker 9 And whenever you see the announcer trending, you think, oh my God, this guy either really fucked something up or like made a minor error on whether or not a coach should go for it in fourth down.

Speaker 9 And then stats Twitter just like made it the biggest deal in the world. But with Collinsworth, it was that he didn't realize that Buffalo was close to Canada.
Ah.

Speaker 9 And then... Classic mistake, guys.
Marshawn Lynch. Marshawn Lynch.
He didn't know. He thought it was New York City.
Yep. But Buffalo, I'll give this one.
Buffalo is not a very Canadian city. No.

Speaker 9 Even though it's very close. I would say like Denver, Seattle are the most Canadian American cities.

Speaker 7 Yes, yes.

Speaker 7 All right, let's get to the rest of the schedule. Let's get through.
We'll start in order. We'll start with the Chiefs and the Dolphins.
Chiefs, 33, Dolphins, 27.

Speaker 7 This is what you call a double win, PFT.

Speaker 9 Oh, why is that? A double win.

Speaker 7 Well, the Chiefs won, so that was

Speaker 7 a win. That was a win.
And the Dolphins fought really hard. And I was actually like, there was a moment there where the Chiefs ran away with it.
They were down. Dolphins up 10-0.

Speaker 7 Chiefs come back with, I think, like 30 basically unanswered, or 21 unanswered. They're up 30 to 10.

Speaker 7 And

Speaker 7 the Dolphins kept on fighting. So it was 30 unanswered.
The Dolphins kept on fighting.

Speaker 7 Their defense can hang. Their defense turned Patrick Mahomes over a couple times, or three times, I want to say.
They have 19 straight games now with defensive turnovers.

Speaker 7 So the Dolphins, even in a loss for a building team trying to establish something, I'm counting it as a win.

Speaker 7 Now, they need a win because they still got to try to make the playoffs, but my personal records, that's a win.

Speaker 9 How about this, Mike Greenberg's dumb rule? If you pick off Patrick Mahomes three times, that should count. That should be like the second

Speaker 9 tiebreaker. So going into the playoffs, if you're tied with somebody, it should be like conference record, and then how many times did you pick off Patrick Mahomes? Because three times,

Speaker 9 that seems like, you know, their defense is legit if they can do that. But even though they picked him off three times, it's like, yeah, well, he's he's still going to get the ball.

Speaker 9 He's still going to keep throwing. With Mahomes, it's like, that's collateral damage.
Right.

Speaker 9 He's just, if he's going to spray the ball all over the field, he might turn the ball over occasionally, but then he'll come back and throw for two touchdowns.

Speaker 9 And he has got like a very short-term memory when it comes to that. So it's like, if you're the Dolphins, it's like, yeah, you know what?

Speaker 9 We did lose to the Broncos, but we also intercepted Patrick Mahomes three times. So that should actually take precedence.

Speaker 7 I agree. It should be like when they had Rock and Jock and Dan Cortez rock and jock, and you could hit like the 40-pointer.

Speaker 7 If you intercept Patrick Mahomes three times in a single game, the game is over right then and there. That's it.

Speaker 9 I'm okay with that.

Speaker 7 It's whoever wins after 60 minutes or gets three interceptions first of Patrick Mahomes.

Speaker 7 So, Mahomes, I mean, like, even in his bad games, which I wouldn't even classify this as a bad game, he just had a couple plays. Like, he had the interceptions.
He also had a 30-yard sack, which

Speaker 7 now breaks the record for longest sack without a fumble involved.

Speaker 7 Tannehill had a fumbled sack, 38 yards.

Speaker 7 The previous longest sack for no fumbles was Matt McGloyne, 29 yards. Patrick Mahomes now, we've, hey, Jeff Schwartz has told us, drifting out of the pocket.

Speaker 9 He drifted backwards.

Speaker 7 Drifting out of the pocket is a problem. But with all that, the Chiefs still win in relative ease.
Like the Dolphins came back at the end, but

Speaker 7 we never really thought that the Chiefs were in trouble. And I just, something about the Chiefs, man, they're just so goddamn good.
And then Tyree Kill Hill is,

Speaker 7 I hate using this term because it's fucking lame as hell, but he is a cheat code because it feels like anytime the Chiefs, they're like, oh, maybe they're struggling down 10-0. All right.

Speaker 7 Well, let's just have Tyree Kill run past everyone,

Speaker 7 whether it be a pass play. I think he ran a touchdown as well.
Like, he'll... He'll just do that, and they know they have that in their back pocket at all times.
Yeah.

Speaker 7 Like, oh, let's let him get deep and pass the defense, and we'll throw a bomb to him. Boom.

Speaker 7 If we need a quick seven, it's almost like the Chiefs are always toying with teams because they have that where it's like, oh,

Speaker 7 listen, we're down. That's fine.
We'll just do a couple plays for Tyreek Hill and we'll be back and we'll be winning and then the game will be over.

Speaker 9 Well, what the Chiefs do is kind of like, it's the opposite of what Hugh Jackson was trying to do with Nick Chubb a couple years ago, but he couldn't figure out a way to get the ball into Nick Chubb's hand on a handoff.

Speaker 9 If Tyreek Hill, if you're not getting the ball to your playmakers with Andy Reid, he's like, why don't we just hand him the ball? Yeah.

Speaker 9 And then he'll just, they did that with Odell Beckham on the Browns also this year.

Speaker 9 It's like, it's pretty easy if you have a guy that's better at running than everybody on the defense and you can't complete a pass to him, just hand him the ball and then let him run.

Speaker 9 Sometimes that can work really well.

Speaker 7 In space, he also leads the league in runs that end up with him grabbing his hamstring and you being like, oh, is he out for a while now?

Speaker 9 That's just because the human body is just so.

Speaker 9 And his hamstring's like, I just need a five. Just need a five after this play.
Hey, he doesn't have to fight.

Speaker 7 Skip after like these big plays. I'm like, oh, there goes Tyreek Hill again.
He's out for a while. Nope, he's fine.

Speaker 9 He leads the league in getting nicked. Yes.

Speaker 9 You know what he does? He gets shaken up sometimes and then he comes right back in. That might be my favorite euphemism for an injury.

Speaker 9 And sometimes when announcers use it, when it's like an obvious concussion, they're like, oh, and he's shaken up a little bit out there. Yeah,

Speaker 9 his brain is no longer connected to the stim.

Speaker 9 But yeah, Tyreek Hill, awesome. Very fun to watch in open space.
Patrick on the sack, yes, 30 yards. Bad sack, hilarious sack.
I actually, I looked up

Speaker 9 specifically the, you know, that dot system that they use to diagram the plays where it shows the dots just drifting down the field. At some point, the nerds were like,

Speaker 9 we're going to take every human element out of football, and even the game film, we're going to replace it with computer software and show them drifting back.

Speaker 9 I'm confident that with enough grit and determination, Derek Carr can absolutely break that record.

Speaker 7 Yes, absolutely. Absolutely break that recording.

Speaker 9 That's such good balance.

Speaker 7 When you get a sack over 20 yards, that's officially maxion. Yeah.
That's a play that should be on a Tuesday night, Ball State versus like Bowling Green.

Speaker 9 We do need to talk also about Andy Reid's face mask, the COVID mask that he's wearing. It keeps getting puffier.
I don't know if that's his breath that's extending it out.

Speaker 7 It's like a balloon, a poorly inflated balloon.

Speaker 9 A balloon or like some sort of alien that uses an oxygen bag that just gradually inflates.

Speaker 9 It looks like it's got Taco Bell in it, which is fine.

Speaker 7 He's definitely hiding something under there.

Speaker 9 He's got something in there. I would like to see Andy Reid wear a face mask that has a print of his mouth and mustache on it.
So it it just looks like Andy Reid's face.

Speaker 7 Ooh, someone should make the meme where, Billy, you should make this.

Speaker 7 It's Andy Reid's face, and then on the inside, it shows the inside of the mask, and it's just a rib that's just sitting there that he's just gnawing on all game long.

Speaker 9 I like to think that it's gnoshing. It's either got a rib or it's corn on the cob on a rotating, like rotisserie-type spit.
Yes.

Speaker 9 And that he's just like munching on it, and he goes back and forth like a typewriter so he can clean that cob off. I like that.

Speaker 7 So the Chiefs now have,

Speaker 7 well, we're still watching the Steelers-Bills game, which will be confusing because we started the show talking about the end of time traveling.

Speaker 7 But the Chiefs look like they're going to possibly have the number one seed, which makes a team that can't really be beat even more unbeatable with the number one seed this year being that much more important.

Speaker 9 And they've got a packed house at Arrowhead, right? They have, what, 17,000 people in this? Yeah, so they do have the biggest home field advantage.

Speaker 7 Homefield advantage. Also, shout out to Tuo because he did play a lot better in this game.

Speaker 7 Like, he had a little bit of a weird start, but he started to throw the ball down the field more, make some big plays. That's, again,

Speaker 7 there are no wins when you lose, but if you could have as close to a win in a loss, it would be this for the Dolphins, where they competed with the Chiefs.

Speaker 7 They had a chance at the end, even though it wasn't really a chance. And Tua played well.
What more can you ask for? And the defense turned over Patrick Mahomes. What more can you ask for?

Speaker 7 Like, that's a game where if they meet again in the playoffs, the Dolphins aren't going to walk into it being like, well, we're going to get our asses kicked.

Speaker 7 They're like, hey, we can hang with these guys.

Speaker 9 It was a statement loss. It directly contradicts the age-old wisdom from Trent Dilfer when he said, I'd like a private jet.

Speaker 9 And then he followed up by saying, you cannot lose and win in the NFL at the same time.

Speaker 9 Not true. I think this counts as a win for the Dolphins.
Congrats to the Dolphins for beating the Chiefs. Great job.

Speaker 9 I think it's fair to say, I think we had this take back when the Raiders beat the Chiefs earlier this year. It's good that the Chiefs lost early.

Speaker 7 Yeah.

Speaker 9 There's absolutely no pressure on them to go undefeated this year.

Speaker 7 Yeah, and they avenged their loss. Yeah.
So it's even better.

Speaker 7 And then last thing I wrote down was, so we had this discussion earlier in the week, Travis Kelsey versus Gronk. Now, for my money, I still think Gronk is the greatest tight end of all time.

Speaker 7 But the fact that that's even starting to become a conversation is a testament to how goddamn good Travis Kelsey is.

Speaker 9 Yeah, and he's cleaned up the little unsportsmanlike conducts that he used to get like three times a game.

Speaker 9 He's not fully extending his arm into the defender's face when he makes a first down motion after a catch. I don't know.
I kind of missed that Travis Kelsey, though.

Speaker 7 He was a wild card.

Speaker 9 This Travis Kelsey is like too buttoned up.

Speaker 7 He will get the benefit of like Gronk aging while he's still in his prime. But again, if you remember Gronk in his prime, you're like, that was a different beast altogether.

Speaker 7 But he's still unbelievable.

Speaker 9 Billy's got to take

Speaker 7 between Kelsey and Gronk

Speaker 9 is that you've never seen Kelsey give a hit when he's running the ball.

Speaker 7 Kelsey takes hits

Speaker 7 and absorbs them. He does.

Speaker 9 He runs through people. He tries to avoid contact if possible.
Sometimes Gronk would unnecessarily initiate contact.

Speaker 7 I feel like Kelsey also is exceptional at getting open for Mahomes, like sitting down and finding those spots. Like you can't,

Speaker 7 if Mahomes has more than three or four seconds, Travis Kelsey will be open.

Speaker 9 Yeah, he's a focused Gronk when it comes to running routes.

Speaker 9 If you gave Gronk riddling,

Speaker 9 but I'm not saying like to hype him up. I'm saying if he had ADD and you gave it to him to calm him down and focus in, that's kind of what Kelsey is.

Speaker 9 But you give and you take with that because then you don't get the crazy gronkness.

Speaker 7 Right, right. All right, next up, Bucs-Vikings,

Speaker 7 talking about losing and winning a game. So the Vikings kind of dominated this game.

Speaker 7 They had the ball for 20 minutes more than the Bucs. They had like 10 more first downs.

Speaker 7 They also had Dan Bailey on their team. So Dan Bailey is the first kicker to miss more than six kicks in two games since the NFL-AFL merger.

Speaker 7 And Dan Bailey last week, this is never good for a kicker, but last week he needed Mike Tom, or sorry, Mike Zimmer to give him a vote of confidence.

Speaker 7 Mike Zimmer last week said, Dan's had a great year, been good in practice this week. Talked to him the other day.
He is confident and he'll be fine.

Speaker 7 After this game, he misses four kicks, three field goals, one extra point, 10 points off the board.

Speaker 7 Mike Zimmer's quote was, at this point, we're not really worried about feelings anymore. There you go.
I'd say, Dan Bailey, you probably don't have a job.

Speaker 9 He's worse at his job than anyone else in the NFL at this current moment. Any starter in the NFL.
It's tough for him to kick side because he's also a product of just being a Minnesota Vikings kicker.

Speaker 9 That position will never be good. It's like the Bears quarterback.

Speaker 7 It's like the drummer for Spinal Tap. Yes, you're going to keep

Speaker 7 dying. It's a curse.
It's the quarterback for the Ephlen Browns. Pianos for the Grateful Dead.
There are cursed positions in the world. Yeah,

Speaker 9 they're living in the kicking version of what's the movie where everybody dies all the time?

Speaker 9 Final Destination. Sixth cents.
Final Destiny.

Speaker 7 No, he was dead the whole movie. Yeah.
Well, the entire movie.

Speaker 9 The whole thing. Spoiler alert.
He was constantly dead. But yeah, they keep.
And Mike Zimmer's not doing him any favors either because I think Mike Zimmer hates him.

Speaker 9 So he's like, yeah, keep going out. I'm going to keep sending you out to try progressively more difficult field goals throughout this game.

Speaker 7 But it wasn't even that bad.

Speaker 9 Like a dad making his son smoke cigarettes until they puke. It's like, okay, keep missing, keep missing.

Speaker 7 It was like a 36-yarder, 54-yarder, 46-yarder. Now, if you're 54-year, that's fine.
Guys miss that. But 36 and 46 are easy in the NFL.

Speaker 7 For NFL kickers, you should make that.

Speaker 9 You should make both. It was Mike Florey who was like, how are you going to send him out there to attempt a 46-yarder on grass? It's like, well, Mike,

Speaker 9 a lot of field goals are something.

Speaker 9 They do a pretty good job cutting it in the NFL. It's pretty short.
So you're not playing at Notre Dame against U.S.

Speaker 7 You can't do that. You're not up to your knees.

Speaker 7 But so this game was weird to me because I was expecting the Bucs to win easily and kind of handle the Vikings because we talked about, you know, Tom Brady off a buy.

Speaker 7 If the Bucs are going to put it all together, this is right when they'll start doing it. I wasn't overly impressed.
I mean, they won the game. They covered the spread.
But the Vikings almost like...

Speaker 7 They kind of got in their own way. I feel like the Vikings had chances to win this game, and I expected the Bucs to dominate a little bit more than they did.

Speaker 7 So now I'm sitting here being like, I don't know.

Speaker 7 Maybe the Bucs will never figure it out.

Speaker 9 This was a big-time took care of business game for the Bucs.

Speaker 9 They handled their business at home against an inferior opponent. And their defensive line is really good.

Speaker 7 I feel like

Speaker 9 we should take a second, though, to appreciate Indominated N Su, who is playing really well. And somehow, like, he looks, his arms are bigger than they've ever been before.
Yes.

Speaker 9 They're like the size of my waist. And then his head, I don't know how this works, but his head is bigger than his helmet.
He just looks terrifying out there. And then JPP,

Speaker 9 with another strip sack. Yep.
And the announcers wanted to be like he took a handoff from Kirk Cousins. Yep.
But you can't say that.

Speaker 7 You can't do that. No, so the Bucs defense is very good.
I actually was a little surprised, though. Dalvin Cook had 100 yards.
Like, the Bucs rush defense is a very good rush defense.

Speaker 7 I think that's the first time a team has run for 100 in a year on them.

Speaker 9 But to be fair with Dalvin Cook, that's not that bad to give up 100 yards.

Speaker 7 No, how many yards were they? But they are 102, but they are

Speaker 7 a very, very good run defense. So that's another one where I just

Speaker 7 don't trust the Bucs. I don't know what to make of the Bucs.
I feel like they're going to flame out in hilarious fashion in the playoffs.

Speaker 7 The good news for the Bucs is they play the Falcons two times in the last three games, and the Lions are in that sandwich.

Speaker 9 That's so funny that they left the Falcons to him twice at the very end. Right.
So in the NFL's brain, they were like, this is going to be great.

Speaker 9 Two division rivals that will be competing for the wild card or the top of the division get to play each other twice. And it didn't quite shake out that way, but it is good for the Bucs.

Speaker 9 They are going to, I think, you're right. They're going to go to the bottom.

Speaker 7 11-5.

Speaker 9 Yeah, they should go 11-5. It's going to be a fraudulent 11-5.

Speaker 7 Yeah, people will be like, ooh, watch out for the Bucs. They won their last four games.

Speaker 7 I just don't. Something about them.

Speaker 7 And here's the hot take: you got to get, what's his name, Scotty Miller, involved more.

Speaker 9 Is Scotty Miller the most important player on that?

Speaker 7 I don't know, man. Every time he's there, he's open.
And it's like, maybe you have, you can't have three number one receivers. Yeah.
You know what I mean? Like, maybe it's, and Gronk.

Speaker 7 Maybe it's good to have one guy who just can wiggle around and get open. Who's the man?

Speaker 9 Yeah. The end of the first half was funny, too, on that Hail Mary that they threw where they interfered with Gronk.
Yeah.

Speaker 9 Then they got one untimed down, which I just, I love the concept of a down that doesn't have time, especially.

Speaker 9 It's amazing. But then they kicked the field goal from the one, which I guess is probably, you take your points, you get free points, but Bruce Arians.
Coward. I expected more from you at that point.

Speaker 9 And I had a dumb idea when I was watching this game, too, when Dan Bailey kept missing. I thought one of them was tipped.
And I thought,

Speaker 9 why don't NFL teams just sign the fastest people on earth to rush on a field goal from the edge? The guys that are unblocked all the time. That's what Beamer used to do.

Speaker 9 He used to recruit, or he used to just swing by track and field practice occasionally at Virginia Tech and be like, hey, have you ever worn a football helmet? Right. Good.

Speaker 9 Well, you're going to be on my special teams.

Speaker 7 You're going to play some Beamer ball.

Speaker 7 There was a year when Madden had a cheat code where you could basically get, remember, you could get up up against the line, but you couldn't cross it on the edge, yeah.

Speaker 7 Yeah, so you could basically push up, and then as soon as they snapped it, you'd be able to block the kick. Yeah, I can't remember what year it was, but it was awesome.

Speaker 9 Why did they make it? It made it impossible to block field goals. Like, no one has ever blocked a kick in a normal video game in the last 20 years.

Speaker 7 I know. What were you saying, Billy?

Speaker 9 It's when you turn penalties off.

Speaker 7 Oh, there it is. Okay, yeah, that's

Speaker 7 a cheat code. All right, next up, Bears, Texans.

Speaker 9 Congratulations.

Speaker 7 Well, here.

Speaker 7 Okay. Allow me to dream for a second.
I crunched some numbers. The Bears, if they win out, they could actually get back into this thing.
It's crazy. It's stupid.

Speaker 7 They're going to probably lose to the Vikings next week and break my heart one last time.

Speaker 7 But this win, technically, if they win out and the Cardinals lose one of their last three, they would be in over the Cardinals. They still have to play the Vikings, Jaguars, and Packers.

Speaker 7 Packers might have everything cinched up. So who knows? Whatever.
I'm going to allow myself to dream for a second. It's being like, wow, next Sunday is a huge game against the Vikings.

Speaker 7 Real talk, though, I'm happy for Mitch. I'm happy for Mitch because

Speaker 7 it can't be easy having to live in the shadow of Deshaun Watson and Patrick Mahomes. You don't get to decide where you're picked.
That's Ryan Pace's fault. Mitch is a good guy.

Speaker 7 He's, you know, a good teammate by all accounts, all these things. So for him to come out and play better than Deshaun Watson was nice for him.
He was awesome in the first half.

Speaker 7 I don't know where, like, the Texans' defense is terrible, but I I don't also know where this play calling, like, why hasn't this been here more often?

Speaker 7 Where he gets a lot of short passes to get rhythm, moves around in the pocket.

Speaker 7 The run game obviously worked because the Texans D-line is bad, but

Speaker 7 today

Speaker 7 Mitch was QB ratings 126.7. Deshaun was 101.9.
Mahomes was 91.9. I'm just going to say it.
Today, Mitch was king.

Speaker 9 Well, here's a fun step. I know you saw this earlier because they put it up on the screen, but Mitch is only one game behind Deshaun Watson in terms of career victories.

Speaker 7 And he has

Speaker 7 two less career losses.

Speaker 9 What about had oh, so his win percentage is better.

Speaker 7 Correct.

Speaker 9 Okay, so I think the numbers bear it out that that was the correct pick for Mitch.

Speaker 7 He had three touchdowns today. Deshaun Watson had one.
I'm just saying. I'm just saying.
He did. He played well.
And I think it's okay to be like, hey, it's good for Mitch, happy for Mitch.

Speaker 7 The Bears are still on the outside looking in. They're still a bad team.
They're a bad coach team.

Speaker 7 The cynic in me is like, oh, this is the perfect example of the bears winning late in the season in a somewhat meaningless game so that everyone keep their job like they'll finish eight and eight and be like well we were close we were right there no you weren't right peaked too late at the very end i i also so part of the dream scenario and this is the nightmare dream scenario uh i think that i think the packers will probably get the first seed we'll get to it later but say the packers have the second seed and they can't get the first seed for some reason week 17 packers come to chicago packers let the bears win just so they can kick the shit out of them in the first round of the playoffs up in Lambeau.

Speaker 9 That would be something.

Speaker 7 That would be my nightmare.

Speaker 7 Because I would totally buy myself a.

Speaker 9 Yeah, you would get amped up for that game. I think it's impossible for the football team to play against the Bears in the playoffs, right? Basically,

Speaker 9 unless I probably, like, if the Buccaneers just

Speaker 9 if they all die.

Speaker 7 The Bears can only get the sevens.

Speaker 9 If the team disowns the NFL and goes and starts their own football league, then it's possible. But besides that,

Speaker 9 that would be a nightmare scenario, but at least you'd make the playoffs.

Speaker 9 The Texans' defense sucks.

Speaker 9 They just suck. J.J.
Watt, I guess, is still good. I think maybe they just stopped taking the steroids since they got caught for him.

Speaker 7 No, they're trying to. Texas pushing was like,

Speaker 9 my hands are, that's all that I know how to do.

Speaker 9 I can't do anything else. So you guys are fucked from now on.

Speaker 7 Their defensive line is very, very bad. The run 2.0, David Montgomery with an 80-yard run.

Speaker 9 Shades of a big deal. I want to say shades of the run.
The run, yeah.

Speaker 9 Because to properly establish the run as being this mythical play, you can't ever say that it has been surpassed or that the sequel

Speaker 7 shades

Speaker 7 initial run. Shades.

Speaker 9 It made us think of that.

Speaker 9 The first one, I'd say, was much better.

Speaker 7 Oh, absolutely. Because it was against the Packers.

Speaker 9 Right. A better team.
Right. And also,

Speaker 9 he got tackled, so he got to stay on offense. He turned the ball over.

Speaker 7 Got a field goal out of it. And then shout out Khalil Mack because,

Speaker 7 you know, last week the defense definitely kind of quit.

Speaker 7 This week, the defense did not. Khalil Mack was a fucking beast.

Speaker 7 It's nice that he's, you know, got the, there's a pride aspect that's involved with the defense and the running out the string of this season. So next week, who knows?

Speaker 7 If they beat the Vikings, if they beat the Vikings, I will be telling myself, because then it's Jaguars, and then who knows?

Speaker 7 So I will be telling myself all kinds of fucking ridiculous shit if they can beat the Vikings next week.

Speaker 9 Then you got Pedro, then you got Curtin, then game seven, anything can happen.

Speaker 7 This is what everyone wants. I will be very, very upset if they lose to the Vikings next week.
They've drawn me back in. Just when I thought I was out, they bring me back in.
God damn it.

Speaker 7 How did they lose the line?

Speaker 9 So I think the issue is that Mitch seems, he's way more confident when he has a lead to begin with. Yeah.
Like when he has a lead.

Speaker 7 Like a 30-point leader.

Speaker 9 Yeah, a 30-point leader. Or just when they're winning, because when he's behind, he's like, oh, shit.
He gets into, oh, shit mode. I got to do something.
There's expectation on me again.

Speaker 9 Mitch, you know you don't do well when people

Speaker 7 want this.

Speaker 9 And people are putting their hopes and dreams into you. So if they can get out to an early, if David Montgomery can score on the first offensive play from Scrimmage, every time.
Every time? Yep.

Speaker 9 I feel like they might have a shot to hang in there with Mars.

Speaker 7 I agree.

Speaker 7 All right. Next up, Cowboys, Bengals,

Speaker 7 Andy Dalton revenge game. And when I say that, it was really just the Cowboys defense.
It was really good. This was a game that Red Zone forgot.

Speaker 7 We did have, though, here's a spin zone for Bengals fans. You had a butt fumble.
You had a legit butt fumble. Trayvion Williams butt fumbled.
Alden Smith scored a touchdown off of it.

Speaker 7 It was pretty much an identical play to the Mark Sanchez. It just didn't happen in prime time and you're not the Jets.
So

Speaker 7 you avoided that. It kind of went under it, slept under the rug.
And then, yeah, the Cowboys, I don't know.

Speaker 7 Like, the Cowboys basically established themselves as not one of the worst three teams in the NFL. Good job.
That was basically what they were playing for. Like, hey, you are 27.

Speaker 9 And they're not mathematically eliminated yet, which is nice.

Speaker 9 Somehow they're not in the NFC Beast. And yeah, Andy Dalton, it was nice to see him go back because you know that he wanted to win this game.
This was one that probably meant a lot to him.

Speaker 7 Yes.

Speaker 9 They ran him out of town, even though he had only been there for infinity years and never won a playoff game. It's insane how they treated Andy Dalton.

Speaker 7 It's very unfair. Very unfair.
Very unfair. It's very unfair.

Speaker 9 Brandon Allen. Brandon Allen is so much better than Ryan Finley.
Yes. It's crazy because these are two quarterbacks I don't think anyone really has a beat on.

Speaker 9 There's no reason why you should fill your brain with any information about Brandon Allen and Ryan Finley.

Speaker 9 But when you watch them play, like I've watched them play off and on for the last, what, four weeks?

Speaker 9 Brandon Allen is like 20 times better than Ryan Finley is. And Ryan Finley sucks.
Yes.

Speaker 7 He's really, really good. Ryan Finley's very bad.

Speaker 9 So I hope Brandon Allen's not hurt because

Speaker 9 I can't bear to watch three more weeks of Brian Finley.

Speaker 7 I forgot about this game. The Bengals should be allowed to opt out, by the way, for the rest of the season.
Do you know that we actually have a Bengals Monday night football game coming up?

Speaker 9 Are you serious? Yes. Are you serious?

Speaker 7 I'm pretty sure they played the Steelers. Oh my God.

Speaker 7 I'm pretty sure they play the Steelers maybe week 16 on Monday night football. This is when the no flex.
I think it's next week. Oh, it's next week.

Speaker 7 We have to take Monday night off. Yeah, the no flex of Monday night is a killer at this time of the year when we get Bengals on Monday night.
Although those two teams,

Speaker 7 they don't like each other.

Speaker 9 People forget that back in like 2015, was it? I think it was 2015.

Speaker 9 There was like a six-month conversation where it was like the Bengals have taken over the place of the Ravens for the Steelers' big rivals. Like these teams, this is AFC North football.
You know what?

Speaker 9 Doesn't Antonio Brown, Vontez Berfict.

Speaker 7 That's what they need to do.

Speaker 7 They need to be like, all right, we know Monday Night Football is going to suck. So let's get Joey Porter.
Let's get Vontez Berfict.

Speaker 7 Let's get,

Speaker 7 I don't know, maybe TJ Hushmanzada. Pac-Man Jones.
Pac-Man Jones. Let's get a couple of the old guys out there.
Let's let them play like Old Timers Day. Yeah.
And we'll call it a Steelers win.

Speaker 7 So it won't even like just, but how much fun would it be to watch old-time Troy Palomalu running around?

Speaker 9 Dude, get Marvin Lewis out there.

Speaker 7 Yes. That would prevent him from interviewing the Bears.

Speaker 7 Gill Cower out there. Yeah.

Speaker 9 I mean,

Speaker 9 that was a very entertaining rivalry for the six months that it existed. Yes.
But in my head, I was like, this is going to take over the Ravens. This is what I need to keep my finger on the pulse of.

Speaker 9 Was not the case.

Speaker 9 Although, for the record, the Bengals should have won that playoff game. Yeah.
They should have won that playoff game.

Speaker 9 That was a disaster.

Speaker 9 It was a nightmare.

Speaker 7 That was a disaster. All right, next up, we have Cardinals, Giants.
The Giants, not so good. So, Joe Judge makes his first very big, very huge mistake of the season.
He's been doing a great job.

Speaker 7 But how do you let, we even said this, Daniel Jones should not be able to decide whether he's injured or not. Guess what? Daniel Jones is very injured.
Daniel Jones got sacked eight times.

Speaker 7 Daniel Jones couldn't move. I think the Giants have a way better chance with Colt McCoy in this game than they do Daniel Jones and the Cardinals' defense.
Like, the Giants' defense did an okay job.

Speaker 7 Kyler Murray got a little bit of his swag back running the ball, but you can't put a guy out there with one leg when half of his game is being a mobile quarterback. Daniel Jones, he is...

Speaker 9 He was very turnover-prone again today. Had three fumbles against the same person.

Speaker 7 He was one guy.

Speaker 7 One guy. Yeah.

Speaker 9 One person, Hassan Reddick, who, by the way, Baldy is busting a grape over the game film from Hassan Reddick right now. Hassan Reddick made him fumble three times.

Speaker 9 That's almost impossible to do to one quarterback. And then you have Colt McCoy in the sidelines.
Colt McCoy's middle name is two wins. He will get you two wins in a season.
Definitely.

Speaker 9 If he's your 16-game starter, he'll get you two wins.

Speaker 7 Right.

Speaker 9 If he fills in in the second half of one game and then has to start another one, he'll get you two wins. Don't ask him to get three.

Speaker 9 Don't ask him to get, dear Lord, don't ask him to get you four wins.

Speaker 9 He will get you two wins. And yeah, it was a travesty that they didn't start.
As a fan of the division, I was pulling for the Giants. Now, I will say,

Speaker 9 I'm not apoplectic about the fact that the Giants lost, but

Speaker 9 I was rooting for the Giants during that game.

Speaker 9 But yeah, Kyler Murray's back.

Speaker 9 I think he's just tired. I think he, like, the first half of the season, he's like, man, they're really asking me to do a lot out here.
Running and passing.

Speaker 7 Well, so I was looking at it. In the three losses they had leading up to this game, he averaged 20 yards a game running.
This game, he had, I think, like 47 or 50, but that makes a big difference.

Speaker 7 Like, he was doing a good job with his feet. That's part of their offense that they need, and they just didn't have it the last three weeks.
So it was a good win for the Cardinals. They stay alive.

Speaker 7 We do have a little bit of a mecha watch for DeAndre Hopkins. So DeAndre Hopkins has played in MetLife four times, over 100 yards each time, averaging 138 yards per game.

Speaker 7 He just steps it up in the mecca.

Speaker 9 That's like Chipper Jones in Shea Stadium.

Speaker 7 Yeah, he's just ready to go in the mecca. He just kills the Jets and the Giants.

Speaker 9 We should name his daughter MetLife or Meadowlands. Meadowlands is actually a very pretty name.
Meadowlands is a beautiful name. Meadowlands Hopkins.

Speaker 7 That's great. Don, don't do it.
Yeah, the Giants, though, their offense was so, so bad. 58 yards in the first half, 159 total.

Speaker 7 I just don't understand how you let Daniel Jones play in that game because you just watch it and he can't move.

Speaker 9 Joe Jones should have been able to sniff that out.

Speaker 7 He should have right away because you just can't, like the Giants' defense,

Speaker 7 they have a recipe, and it's, you know, controlling the clock, running the ball, not making mistakes, and playing good defense. And then you just have Daniel Jones out there who can't do anything.
And

Speaker 7 I felt like the Giants, every time we had the game on, but it felt like the Giants were in third and nine from their own

Speaker 7 10-yard line the entire game. The entire game, they were in that exact situation with a quarterback who's on one leg.

Speaker 9 And I mean, to be honest, the Cardinals, they didn't really impress me that much in this one. Yeah, defensively.

Speaker 7 They don't impress them.

Speaker 9 Defensively, they were okay.

Speaker 7 Yeah. But, yeah, Faith Hill, you said it.

Speaker 9 I don't think that this, I think that the Cardinals are going to lose their first game in the playoffs if they make it.

Speaker 7 Yeah, oh, definitely. And I hope they don't make it.

Speaker 7 All right. Next up.

Speaker 7 Broncos Panthers. Moxie.
Drew Locks. Moxie is back.

Speaker 7 Yeah. Or did he play the Panthers?

Speaker 9 He played the Panthers, and I've opted out of backing Drew Locke this year. So that means I can choose to opt back in.
And that's the way I'm going to dismount that take. Yep.

Speaker 9 Because I'm not going to.

Speaker 9 If you think that Drew Locke becomes a Pro Bowler next year, and I'm not going to claim that I was all over Drew Locke from the very start, my friend, you are fucked in the head because I will hop back on that take so fast it'll make your head spin.

Speaker 9 But I've opted out this year at the very minimum. But yeah, Drew Locke had four touchdowns today.
Panthers defense sucks.

Speaker 7 Not good. Not good.
This was a weird game that had high scoring, but I feel like another game that Red Zone kind of forgot. Like, we didn't really see a lot of this.

Speaker 7 This was the one game that we decided not to have on the TVs

Speaker 7 because both teams are out of it and not really playing for anything. But

Speaker 7 it felt like we just didn't see a lot of updates from it.

Speaker 9 Yeah. Well, we saw Jeremy Chin at another force level.

Speaker 9 He's entering nose for the football territory.

Speaker 7 Yep. Big time.

Speaker 7 Big time.

Speaker 9 Christian McCaffrey, do we know what's actually wrong with him at this point? Everything. Everything's wrong?

Speaker 7 Yeah, having to run the ball a billion times a game.

Speaker 9 Yeah.

Speaker 7 Fucking Olivia Colpo. Oh, no, no.

Speaker 9 They're virgins. She told Mrs.
McCaffrey they were virgins and not fucking when she posted all the game.

Speaker 7 She's in the leadership wall.

Speaker 7 Yeah. Oh, Big Ben just threw a pick to end that game.
And they're going to return it. Wait, what's

Speaker 9 41 point?

Speaker 9 I need one score here, and the over is going to hit.

Speaker 7 You're 48 and a half? Yeah.

Speaker 7 So a touchdown wouldn't get it. Shit.

Speaker 9 I'm bad at math. A touchdown and two-point conversion would.

Speaker 7 Touchdown and two-point conversion.

Speaker 9 Go for two. Books says go for two.
You're up 11.

Speaker 7 A lot of time.

Speaker 7 All right. So, yeah, this game, I don't really have much else for this game.
It was one of those games that was good for the Broncos.

Speaker 7 I still believe the Broncos have a great roster going forward that they just need a quarterback. Like the Broncos.

Speaker 7 The Broncos, I'll call right now, are going to be my team to

Speaker 7 make the playoffs next year after missing it this year.

Speaker 9 What about Drew Locke? If Drew Locke comes next year,

Speaker 7 I disavow. But if they can find a quarterback, I will be in on the Broncos next year.

Speaker 9 In job time. You know, John Elway right now is very excited for this offseason.
Yes. Because there's nothing that John Elway likes more than selecting a quarterback who sucks.

Speaker 9 The only thing he likes more is going on a hunt for a quarterback. So he's going to, like, he's already assembling binders filled with all the quarterbacks.
He's going to find his guy.

Speaker 9 He's got, yeah, his office right now looks like Kerry Matheson in homeland.

Speaker 9 He's got Trey Lance circled with five Sharpies.

Speaker 7 I love it. I love it.
All right. Next up, Tractor Cito.
Titans, Jaguars. Tractor Cito,

Speaker 7 Derrick Henry, 215 yards, two touchdowns. Since 2018, he has four 200-yard games.
Northern running back has more than one.

Speaker 7 And the Titans, I'm going to give the Titans some credit here because

Speaker 7 they got punked by the Browns last week. Yes, the Jaguars suck, but the Jaguars have been a little bit of gamey.
You know what I mean? Like, they've been in some games.

Speaker 7 So they actually were in the game against the Browns. They're in the game against the Vikings.
So, for the Titans to kind of put it on the Jaguars, like, that's what a good team does.

Speaker 7 They bounce back. They kick the shit out of an inferior opponent.

Speaker 7 They deserve credit for that. That's more than just, oh, they beat the Jaguars.
No, they killed the Jaguars.

Speaker 7 And they kind of needed that type of win for me to get back into, like, ooh, the Titans could be a good playoff team.

Speaker 9 You know what, Big Cat? It's Track Corcedo season, and I'm looking at the stats right now. I'm officially putting a 2K watch on Derrick Henry right now.
He's got 1,532 rushing yards.

Speaker 9 He's got three games left. He plays the Lions,

Speaker 9 the Packers.

Speaker 9 We know that run defense is soft. They gave up the run.

Speaker 7 Yep. Then,

Speaker 9 the Texans, the Texans who gave up shades of the run. Yep.
So

Speaker 9 three games.

Speaker 7 He could get to

Speaker 9 the dozens. And it would be, I mean, I'm going to call the hashtag right now.
It's going to be hashtag D-E-R-R-I2K Henry.

Speaker 7 He should be in the MVP race.

Speaker 9 I think he is.

Speaker 7 Yeah, but like more so than people will say right now, because you know the conversation is Mahomes versus Rogers. He should absolutely be in the MVP race.

Speaker 9 He's going to be the third.

Speaker 9 But then people will say the NFL is a quarterback-driven league. Well, we've got to give to one of these guys.

Speaker 7 Yeah, or why don't we have an MVP and then why don't we have a quarterback of the year? Because the quarterbacks always win. The last time a running back won the MVP is what? LT?

Speaker 9 Well, you know what happened then, Big Cat.

Speaker 7 Was that right, Jake? I'm pretty sure. 2006?

Speaker 9 What would happen would be they'd still give the MVP to a quarterback. Then the second best quarterback would get the quarterback of the year.

Speaker 7 Quarterback of the year. Yeah.
AP in 2012. Oh, that's right.
And then LT, yes, yes. AP had 200 Alexander 25.

Speaker 9 I feel like Derrick Henry's got to be up there for

Speaker 9 guys that if they were not on their team, their team would absolutely suck.

Speaker 7 Yes, absolutely. Absolutely.
And he's just a scary dude when he's coming around the corner with that, like, with just full speed. and it felt like he was doing that all day.
I have a take.

Speaker 7 I have a take. Oh, by the way, AJ Brown's catch was awesome.

Speaker 9 Yeah, awesome. He's got, I mean, when he reaches his arm out, they're like sticky fingers.
Yeah, like an eagle.

Speaker 7 Yeah. I have a take.
Are you ready for this take? Yep. And now, wait.

Speaker 7 Yep. Before I say this take, I will admit there is a little bit of bias in this take.
There's a tiny, itsy bitsy little bit of bias, okay?

Speaker 7 I think

Speaker 7 Leonard Fournette being drafted fourth in 2017 was a worse pick than Mitch Trubisky.

Speaker 7 I actually agree with you.

Speaker 7 Hank just laughed in my face.

Speaker 9 No, no, that is 100%.

Speaker 7 He just laughed in my face.

Speaker 9 Hank, do you know who was still available at that point with the fourth overall pick? I'm sure Big Cat will tell you.

Speaker 7 Patrick Mahomes and Deshaun Watson, you know who else was available if you wanted to go running back? Christian McCaffrey at eight.

Speaker 7 Yeah, but who was the Jazzwars quarterback?

Speaker 10 They didn't need a.

Speaker 7 They didn't need a quarterback, but no, but Christian McCaffrey at eight. So, and taking a running back with the fourth overall pick is crazy.

Speaker 7 And on top of all that, James Robinson, shout out, Roll Birds,

Speaker 7 reached 1,000 yards today. He is only one of three running backs to have a thousand yards this season.
Dalvin Cook, Derrick Henry, James Robinson.

Speaker 7 They cut Leonard Fournette this year, and James Robinson got a thousand yards on a very bad Jaguars team.

Speaker 9 They also could have had Alvin Kamara.

Speaker 7 Yeah, I think that Leonard Fournette is, it's never going to get talked about because obviously it's a quarterback-driven league, like we just said.

Speaker 7 The Mitch Trubisky pick will always go down because of who came after him. But in terms of just like, if you go back to it and just the decision-making in the moment, like it didn't make sense.

Speaker 9 Things get time.

Speaker 7 Things get written. People still had Mitch ranked very high then.
Like, they did. You can pretend they didn't, but they did.

Speaker 7 You want to say Ryan Pace made a mistake not talking to Patrick Mahomes, Deshaun Watson? You will not hear any,

Speaker 7 you know, any

Speaker 7 complaint.

Speaker 9 You're not going to put up a fight.

Speaker 7 I'm not going to put up a fight on that.

Speaker 7 But I think Leonard Fournette was a worst pick that doesn't get talked about because Christian McCaffrey, Alvin Kamara, and it's the fourth pick with a running back. And you cut him.

Speaker 7 And then the guy who comes in, who's like a no-name, does really well on a bad Jaguars team. And guess what happened with Leonard Fournette today? Healthy scratch with the Bucs.

Speaker 7 They literally are like, no, we don't want this guy anymore.

Speaker 9 You don't hear it that much because you're a Bears fan and it's so much fun to tell you and remind you about the

Speaker 7 Sean Washington. Let's change the the i think for most jaguars most jaguars fans and they hate

Speaker 9 they hate it at the time they hate it now like it gets brought up to them all the time that can be put on was that tom coughlin uh he must have been i think it's coughlin being like we want we want an old school hard-nosed running back i'm just he probably he's probably saw that run against auburn where he threw the guy off his shoulders and was like that's my guy let's start talking about 2017 the biggest mistake in the draft was leonard fornette drafted fourth to the jaguars here's a take and you're probably also going to say for me that this is a little bit of a homer take, might be a little biased.

Speaker 9 I don't think the Jaguars should fire Doug Marone. No, I don't think so either.
I think they should keep him around because he's a great guy. He's a great dude.
He's just a great dude.

Speaker 9 He's an awesome guy. And Big Cat, they're getting a new general manager in.
He's going to want to get the lay of the land for a while.

Speaker 9 And if you really believe that Doug Marone is that bad of a head coach, then keep him around for another year, amass more picks, excuse me, assets, get more assets, more draft capital.

Speaker 9 And then if the GM decides, like, I can't get along with this person, then you're welcome to kick him out.

Speaker 7 Right. And his sunglasses make him always look cool.
Yes. I love his sunglasses.

Speaker 9 Also, Doug Marone feeds off the fans. Yes.

Speaker 9 You need to have him in a packed house with people swimming in the pool in their blue jeans to properly evaluate the job that Doug Marone's doing.

Speaker 7 I agree. I'm just saying, 2017,

Speaker 7 that's a bad pick by the Jaguars. Let's start talking about it more.
Also, John Ross going nine is really, really bad for the Bengals, who definitely needed a quarterback. John Ross is fast.

Speaker 7 They picked him before. Let's just, you know, let's talk about it, folks.
Let's just open up the books and let's talk about it.

Speaker 9 When was Al Davis's Ouija board going to be picking? Because they needed to get John Ross off the board before they got up.

Speaker 7 Yes, they did.

Speaker 4 Give it up for Chicago.

Speaker 11 Sebastian Meniscalco's new stand-up special, It Ain't Right, is coming to Hulu on November 21st.

Speaker 4 30 years ago, Jeff Bezos, complete nerd. Bezos now ripped to shreds on his super yacht.
And the boxes keep coming.

Speaker 11 Sebastian Maniscalco, It Ain't Right. Premieres November 21st, streaming on Hulu and Hulu on Disney Plus for bundle subscribers.
Terms apply.

Speaker 7 All right. Next up, Colts Raiders.
I actually wrote down in my notes before we started.

Speaker 7 Paul Gunther's never going to get fired, the defensive coordinator of the Oakland or Las Vegas Raiders because he and John Gruden are best friends.

Speaker 7 Paul Gunther is such good friends with the Grudens that when he was

Speaker 7 moving on from the Bengals, so he was the defensive coordinator for the Bengals 2018, it was literally like a bidding war between Jay and John Gruden, who would hire Paul Gunther.

Speaker 7 That's how much they love him. I think their wives are best friends.
John Gruden was never going to fire him. Turns out he just fired him.

Speaker 9 I can't imagine a worse city to be fired in than Las Vegas.

Speaker 7 He just fired him. Paul Gunther.
What do you do? This is why

Speaker 9 you sit at the roulette wheel just like crying. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 9 There's no like, there's no somber place that you can go in that city. Like, there's no park you can go sit on a bench and feed the ducks and cry.

Speaker 9 You just, you have to go somewhere with like blasting lights and sounds where everyone's happy, having a great time.

Speaker 7 Well, I think he actually is going to be okay because Jay Gruden probably texts him and is like, hey, as soon as I get another head coaching job, you'll be on my staff.

Speaker 7 Because Paul Gunther is a perfect example of why

Speaker 7 anyone in the NFL, if you have a job, you have a job for life.

Speaker 7 So in the last

Speaker 7 six out of the last seven years, he's been a defensive coordinator. His team has finished

Speaker 7 in the back half of yards. The last three years, the Raiders have been the worst team in

Speaker 7 defensive efficiency.

Speaker 7 The last three years, his team's finished 32nd, 24th, 28th in giving up points. And he kept his job for this long because

Speaker 7 he's best friends with John Gruden. So I'm shocked that John Gruden has actually fired him, but it happened because it needed to happen because the Raiders were so bad on defense today.

Speaker 9 They got like manhandled. If you get gashed by Phillip Rivers at this point,

Speaker 9 that's a red flag.

Speaker 9 That's a little post-it note on your resume right there.

Speaker 7 Credit to the Colts' offensive line because they gave up no sacks and they averaged 6.8 yards per carry, which is significant and uh yeah I'm I the Raiders are kind of lost like they all that good I swear to God I've never seen a team fall off so hard from a statement loss yeah they they they lost on primetime to the chiefs in a game where they were winning with a minute left and everyone's like they went toe-to-toe with the chiefs and then since then they lost by a billion to the falcons needed dr heat to dial it up to beat the winless jets and then just lost by a billion to the Colts.

Speaker 7 Their season, they lifted the Lombardi trophy after they lost to the Raiders by like four points in prime time. Or the Chiefs.

Speaker 9 Yeah, I mean, they did that when they beat the Chiefs that first time. Right.
You know what? It was the lapse that John Gruden did around the stadium. It was the curse of the lapse.

Speaker 9 They showed off too soon.

Speaker 9 And ever since then, it's been totally downhill. They need to elevate Deuce.
Deuce Gruden should be their defensive coordinator at this point.

Speaker 9 Like, what better friend can you get than your little Pitbull

Speaker 9 youngest son that'll just come in and just kick the shit out of everybody on the team until they start making hits? But Gunther, fun story about Gunther,

Speaker 9 he wanted to fight me in Indy, which I respect. I respect that, by the way.
I think he should have punched me. But we were in a bar.
It was a pretty hilarious time.

Speaker 9 It was like right across the street from where everybody usually hangs out during the combine.

Speaker 9 And there's like a quieter bar that's across the street from it where we went to just kind of like get out of the mayhem. That was, was it Prime 57? That's that steakhouse?

Speaker 9 And so I was hanging out with, I'm going to name drop really badly right here. It was Jay Gruden, Vrabel, Sean Payton was there, and Gunther was with him.

Speaker 9 And I was sitting at the bar and we were like, he was talking shit to me about which coach he would beat up. He was like, I'd kick Vrabel's ass.
He's not old enough to have old man strength yet.

Speaker 9 He's still in that in-between phase. And then Jay Gruden was like, who in this bar would you like to punch in the face the most? And he was like, PFT.

Speaker 9 And he was like, why? Because he talks a lot of shit. And I was like, that's fair.

Speaker 9 The moral of the story is I believe that he would, if he was the type of guy to have actually punched me in my face, he'd still have a job. He'd be a better defensive coordinator.

Speaker 9 That should have been my first indication that he's not about this life. If you're not going to punch me in the face,

Speaker 9 you're not going to be able to punch the Chiefs fucking offensive line in the face. You're not going to be able to inspire, what's his name, Cleland Farrell? It's true.

Speaker 9 To go out there and hit somebody else. Like, I have top 10 punchable face I know at this company, probably in the greater tri-state area.

Speaker 7 And the best part about that story is maybe this is like the duality of this podcast, but maybe that night or the night before, I also talked to him at the bar and he gave me his phone number. Yeah.

Speaker 9 Well, he wanted to fuck you.

Speaker 7 He was like, yeah.

Speaker 7 He was like, yo, I should come on. I was like, yeah, give me your phone number.

Speaker 9 He was mad, I wouldn't fuck him.

Speaker 7 So he punched me in my face.

Speaker 9 No, I think he was saying it as a joke at the time because we were

Speaker 9 doing a lot of alcohol together. Oh, you're doing it.

Speaker 7 We're having a good time.

Speaker 9 Yeah.

Speaker 9 But the fact that he didn't punch me in my face, I knew right then I was like, not a football guy.

Speaker 7 Yes.

Speaker 9 Tom Table would assault me right now.

Speaker 7 So the Raiders are done. We talked about this on Friday, but the Raiders are done.
The Colts are back all the way back in it. This was the game that shifted all of the playoff

Speaker 7 setup here.

Speaker 7 And

Speaker 7 the Colts, we also told you T.Y. Hilton and Phil Rivers seemingly are on the same page now.
That's becoming a deadly combo. Like, T.Y.
Hilton was lost at the beginning of the the year.

Speaker 7 He is now found.

Speaker 7 I think he had two touchdowns.

Speaker 7 We also had Jonathan Taylor.

Speaker 7 Shout out Jonathan Taylor who's kind of been like, I feel like there's been times where he's been in Frank Reich's doghouse, but he looks good and he had an awesome touchdown run.

Speaker 7 And then should we talk about Josh Jacobs and how mad fantasy owners must be?

Speaker 9 Very, very angry.

Speaker 9 Adam Schefter tweeted out before the game, like Josh Jacobs put on his Instagram story that he's not starting.

Speaker 9 By the way, I put a lot of this blame on Adam Schefter for amplifying, for signal boosting that. Yep.
Because Adam Schefter doesn't, he's not an Instagram story guy. He can't understand tone.

Speaker 9 So he basically passed that along as a reported fact and then was like, well, it looks like he was just trolling fantasy owners out there, which he was. Good job.

Speaker 9 Matthew Berry probably wants to have him killed. Probably going to hire a hitman and put out a contract on him.
But yeah, I actually say well done to Josh Jacobs. Yes.

Speaker 9 That was as somebody who does not own Josh Jacobs on any of our how many

Speaker 7 Seven. 25

Speaker 9 fantasy teams? Yep. I say well played.

Speaker 7 So

Speaker 7 Gruden gave a great Gruden quote afterwards. Someone asked him about this, this Josh Jacobs saying it on his Instagram that he wasn't going to play.
Gruden said, I don't have social media.

Speaker 7 I'll answer any questions about the game, not the internet.

Speaker 7 So don't be bringing those internet questions around John Gruden.

Speaker 9 He might not have the internet even.

Speaker 7 No, he probably doesn't. No, he probably doesn't.
But yeah,

Speaker 9 that's that's it for the raiders right that's it that's it yeah this was a game steve kornacki is that his name steve kornacki steve kornacki busted a grape because this threw all the percentages off kilter and he got like some solidified teams into the postseason so his khakis turned like a darker stain of brown uh and the raiders are they're done there's nothing they can do at this point yeah no they're they're it is over so all the raiders fans who told us that we didn't respect the raiders enough uh turns out we were probably right to not respect them all that much Have you also noticed that they put Jacoby Brissette in for knee plays?

Speaker 9 Like when they take a knee? Yes. Yeah.

Speaker 9 So it's like if there's any danger at all that your quarterback might have to take more than three steps with the football, Jacoby Brissette's human victory cigar.

Speaker 9 He's going to be, he got the save today.

Speaker 7 Yes. All right.
Next up, Jets Seahawks.

Speaker 7 I have a very fun stat for you, PFT.

Speaker 7 The New York Jets. This is a stat from my own brain.
I just was like, hey, this is kind of weird. I'm going to go look this up.
So they were winning this game 3-0. Yeah.
So I went and looked it up.

Speaker 7 The New York Jets are 0-13.

Speaker 7 PFT, how many times do you think they have scored first?

Speaker 9 I know it's been at least five games.

Speaker 7 They have scored first in more than half of their games. They have scored first in seven of their 13 losses.
Hyperdrive. Hyperdrive.
Yeah.

Speaker 7 After they have scored first, they have been outscored 210 to 95. That's the problem.
I don't think that's a problem. That's a problem.

Speaker 7 Including two times. today, they were outscored 40 to nothing, and a few weeks ago, they were outscored 20 to nothing after scoring first.

Speaker 7 Fun fact,

Speaker 9 you probably don't know about hot starts when it comes to jets, like the actual airplane jets, do you? You know what a hot start is?

Speaker 7 Yeah, no.

Speaker 9 Tell me. A hot start is when you try to turn on a jet after it's just been turned off.
Yeah. And it doesn't work.
The fuel boils, and the jet immediately, it's called vapor lock. So there we go.

Speaker 7 You can't even turn a jet on.

Speaker 9 Their hot starts are vapor locked. Shit.
Because the Jets, you should know this.

Speaker 7 Yes. Yes.
The Jets have vapor locked themselves.

Speaker 9 I do miss Dr. Heat.
Yeah. Dr.
Heat wouldn't have gotten blown out like this.

Speaker 7 No. Well, no, he probably would have given up 60.
Yeah. But they would have gone

Speaker 7 down trunk one way or the other. Yeah.
But that was

Speaker 7 a very ridiculous stat that the Jets have scored first.

Speaker 7 Imagine if you bet that. It's always got to be plus money.
They're seven and six scoring first. Right.

Speaker 9 It's got to be huge plus money. Yes.
So now they play the Rams next week. So if I'm Adam Gase,

Speaker 9 I actually would not have them stay on the West Coast. I'd bring him back because

Speaker 9 you want to be around the office so that maybe you'll get fired. Right.
They're not going to fire you when you're on the West Coast. It's like that's a big pain in the ass.

Speaker 9 We have to send another plane out there. We have to pay for a separate flight back for him.
But if you're around the office, just reminding your owner what a big shithead you are all the time.

Speaker 7 Yeah, just stay out there. Yeah.
Just stay out there. Just stay out there.

Speaker 9 But stay out there if you don't want to get fired. Right.
I feel like Adam Gates probably.

Speaker 7 I don't think he's going to get fired. He can't get fired.
He wouldn't mind. They're torturing him.

Speaker 9 He wouldn't mind being fired.

Speaker 7 He's being waterboarded with losses.

Speaker 7 It's exceptional. They all hate him, and they're like, the only thing that we can do to really stick it to him is make him keep coaching the Jets.

Speaker 9 So they've got the Browns and the Patriots. Who else are they playing?

Speaker 7 Who, the Jets? Yeah, the Jets. Yeah, the Rams, Browns, and Patriots.
They're going 16.

Speaker 9 Well, week 17,

Speaker 9 is there any way that Belichick would lose intentionally?

Speaker 7 No, he hates the Jets. Right?

Speaker 9 What if he worked out some sort of backyard deal where it was like

Speaker 7 Sam Darnold? Wait, if the Jaguars possibly have the tiebreaker, I don't know how that would work. Because the Jaguars beat the Colts week one.
So, yeah,

Speaker 7 if Belichick could somehow keep Trevor Lawrence from going to the Jets, he would definitely try to do it then.

Speaker 7 Absolutely. If he could keep them

Speaker 7 hating the Jets even more by fucking them over then. Strength of schedule is a tiebreaker.
And

Speaker 13 who has it?

Speaker 9 I guess it would depend on how things progress with those other teams.

Speaker 9 So the Patriots need to win two games.

Speaker 7 I'm going to guess that the Jets would have strength of schedule because they played the NFC West and the Jags played the NFC North. So that would probably be the tiebreaker.

Speaker 9 So Belchek might, yeah, he might do it. Yeah.
I would absolutely see Belichick doing that to

Speaker 9 keep Trevor Lawrence out of the way.

Speaker 7 That would be incredible. Oh, my God.

Speaker 9 And then he could tell Sam Darnold, like, hey, when you become a free agent, come to New England. Right.
And in turn, I won't have the Owen 16 label hanging over you.

Speaker 7 Right, right.

Speaker 7 So, yeah, so the Jets, Geno Smith got in. That was awesome.
Yep. Great to see Geno Smith.
I still believe in Geno Smith. I don't know why, but I just do.

Speaker 9 Because that West Virginia offense was fun as shit.

Speaker 7 Yeah, and he, like... Yeah, I just, I think I read an article whenever he was coming out being like the perfect quarterback.

Speaker 7 You can find that for pretty much any quarterback that's ever been drafted in the first round.

Speaker 9 J.P. Lossman had a whole documentary right now.

Speaker 7 Yeah, someone wrote something saying, like, the perfect quarterback now exists, Geno Smith. Yeah, because it was his accuracy.
It was like, this guy is 80% accurate.

Speaker 9 In that offense at West Virginia,

Speaker 9 they don't teach you how to do anything. You don't have to go to class.
It actually sounds like

Speaker 7 Jack. Look up his accuracy.

Speaker 7 It's his completion in college.

Speaker 9 But yeah, coming out,

Speaker 9 I was befuddled too, Big Cat, when he fell to the second day. Yeah.

Speaker 7 What the fuck?

Speaker 9 Geno dude were idiots for not drafting he's incredible fortunately the jets drafted him and their

Speaker 7 dinosaur at west virginia 67.4 okay so maybe not as no he had like 80 i think his senior year yeah he was well senior year 71 okay there we go he don't miss yeah maybe no smith don't miss maybe if he was better he probably wouldn't have stayed till his senior year probably

Speaker 13 entering this week the jets strength of schedule was 60 and the jags was 55 so that's a pretty big gap with only three weeks left yeah so i would guess that would mean the Jets would have the tiebreaker.

Speaker 7 Yeah.

Speaker 9 Well, yeah, the Jets also

Speaker 9 play some tough opponents. Right.
You got the Rams and the Browns. Yeah.

Speaker 7 I just looked it up because I was trying to find the article I read, and I looked up Geno Smith's perfect quarterback, and then I found this stat.

Speaker 7 Geno Smith is the only quarterback in NFL history to have a 0.0 passer rating and a perfect passer rating in the same season while starting in both games. It's amazing.
That's incredible.

Speaker 9 Also, people don't talk about the fact that

Speaker 7 low floor, high ceiling.

Speaker 9 Remember when he got got his jaw broken? Yes. By like a

Speaker 7 special teamer?

Speaker 7 Iowa Juan

Speaker 9 over $100 a plane ticket.

Speaker 7 What? He punched him in the face.

Speaker 9 Oh, that's right. He didn't refund him.

Speaker 7 No, was it Quincy Inua? No.

Speaker 9 No. No, it was not a wide receiver.
It was like a special team or seventh-round pick.

Speaker 7 Player who punched Genius.

Speaker 9 He went to the Browns after, I think. That guy should be, yeah, I think he did.
That guy should be a Hall of Famer for the Jets.

Speaker 7 NM

Speaker 7 Polly.

Speaker 9 Yeah, I got to find the pronunciation.

Speaker 7 Get the pronunciation, will you?

Speaker 7 Jets players claim Geno Smith deserved to get punched. Yeah.

Speaker 7 Geno Smith. Oh, man.

Speaker 9 I remember when that story broke. Enem Polly.

Speaker 7 Yeah.

Speaker 9 When that story broke, I was in Bristol on the set of first take.

Speaker 7 And they

Speaker 9 the production assistants came in right before.

Speaker 9 They started the show to tell them the news. And then Skip and Stephen A had to delay the start of taping so that they could review the information.
And then, of course, like Stephen A.

Speaker 9 Smith was like, he deserved it.

Speaker 7 Yes.

Speaker 7 That was the take he came in.

Speaker 9 Guns blazing.

Speaker 7 Yes, he absolutely deserved it. All right.
So, yeah, the Seahawks got right. The Jets, HyperDrive.

Speaker 7 Once again, seven games of their 13 losses, they have scored first. And they've been outscored 210 to 95 since.
Unbelievable. All right.
Uh, Packers, Lions.

Speaker 7 This is these, these statements I'm about to say is like, if I could, I would just jump in front of a moving bus right after I say it. Here we go.

Speaker 7 The Packers clinch the NFC North. The Packers will most likely get the one seed.
Aaron Rodgers takes a stranglehold on the MVP.

Speaker 7 And then, boom, I jump in front of a bus and die, and I don't have to think about any of this stuff.

Speaker 9 However, here's a good spin zone. They're almost like a little bit too perfect on offense, aren't they?

Speaker 9 There's got to be something going on

Speaker 9 because they've got a running game, and they've got what seems to be a good good relationship between the head coach and Aaron Rodgers. Like all that stuff.

Speaker 9 And they've got a fucking awesome wide receiver. It's too perfect, big cat.

Speaker 7 I'm just.

Speaker 9 Everyone has advice.

Speaker 7 Listen, I still think they're soft. I still think they can be had.
But with the one seed, it changes everything. Because if they only have to win two games in Lambeau, I'm nervous.

Speaker 7 I'm officially nervous.

Speaker 7 I'm admitting it. I'm bearing my soul.
I'm officially nervous. Like, the idea of a Packers Chiefs Super Bowl and it being a shootout and everyone being like the greatest Super Bowl ever.
Yeah.

Speaker 7 And all, yeah, Super Bowl one. I'm sorry, Super Bowl one.
Yeah, there'd be a lot of

Speaker 7 the greatest Super Bowl ever.

Speaker 7 And then he wins. And then

Speaker 7 I will jump in front of a bus. Then I will be, bus, you drive the bus.
I'll hop in front. Just put me in a coma.
I don't care. Life will have no meaning.

Speaker 7 I'll be the only person in the world who'd be like, 2021, worst year ever.

Speaker 9 It'd be very funny, though, if

Speaker 9 they had that matchup at the Super Bowl and no reporters were allowed to go to it and write stories about how it's the rematch of Super Bowl 1. Right.

Speaker 9 And then, tell you what, put Bruce Springsteen performing at halftime, too, and none of the reporters can be down there to watch it. That would be great.
The game that all the media missed.

Speaker 7 Fuck, man. Man, I can't have this PFT.
But I can't. Okay.
What did I do?

Speaker 9 They have to have advice.

Speaker 9 They're soft.

Speaker 7 They cheat on hard counts. They're soft.
You know what? They love

Speaker 7 too much.

Speaker 7 You know how Aaron gets when he's very close with people. The Lions are an interim head coach.
Stafford got hurt. Chase Daniel played, and they still were in this game.

Speaker 9 And the Lions stink at home.

Speaker 7 And the Lions stink at home. Think about that.
This actually didn't even count as a win.

Speaker 7 Didn't even count as a win.

Speaker 9 So back-to-back

Speaker 7 taking away their win.

Speaker 9 You give up the run and the win. Yikes.

Speaker 7 Yeah.

Speaker 9 That's embarrassing. I just did it.
As a Packers owner and not a fan, but as an owner, as a businessman, yeah, we got to take some looks in the mirror about that.

Speaker 9 Although, I could still see the Giants just because of the history. If the Giants make the playoffs, I could see the Giants beating the Packers in Lambeau.

Speaker 7 Fuck, man. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

Speaker 7 All right, that's all I have for this game. I literally wrote it down.
I want to hop in front of a bus. Packers, Clinch, NFC North, probably a buy, Rodgers MVP.
Fuck.

Speaker 9 Is there any chance at all the Bucs could do it?

Speaker 7 No.

Speaker 9 Brady.

Speaker 9 Brady vs. Rodgers

Speaker 7 in Lambeau. The Saints, but then Drew Brees.

Speaker 9 Their running defense is. Actually, both of those teams have excellent running defenses.

Speaker 7 Dude, the Saints, but Drew Brees in like 10-degree weather with his broken shoulder and 17 broken ribs.

Speaker 9 He's going to have a heavy flat jacket on, though.

Speaker 7 He actually, Drew Brees in Lambeau. I'm thinking about it right now, going to play the Packers.
He will be...

Speaker 7 What's the guy from Game of Thrones? The

Speaker 7 Reek. No, no, the Dark Knight.

Speaker 7 Mountain. No, the fucking glass guy, the blue guy.

Speaker 7 What the fuck is this Night King? The Night King. And he gets stabbed by Aria.
Sorry, spoiler. And he just shatters.
That's going to be Drew Brees. He's just going to shatter like glass.
Okay.

Speaker 7 When he gets that cold, he's going to, he'll get hit, and he will just shatter into a million pieces, and the series will be over. I don't know.

Speaker 7 No, I don't think so.

Speaker 9 I think that a team with a really good rushing defense can go up there and play manball against the Packers.

Speaker 7 I'm worried. I'm very, very worried.

Speaker 9 Manball, that's just a kick-ass name for a sport.

Speaker 7 I'm worried. All right, speaking of the Saints, they lost to the Eagles.
And we found out Taysom Hill's probably not that dude.

Speaker 9 Yeah, if I were to put on my Colin Coward hat, which does he wear a hat? Backwards. Forwards.
My forwards. Backwards.
Fake soup lover, Colin Coward, fake

Speaker 7 soccer Colin Coward.

Speaker 9 Colin Coward is a fake soup lover. I guarantee you, every fucking time

Speaker 9 Colin Coward eats a bowl of soup. He posts about it on social media.

Speaker 7 Did you see three minutes ago?

Speaker 9 This is not a man

Speaker 9 that eats soup offline.

Speaker 7 He eats soup for the clout.

Speaker 9 I can tell it.

Speaker 7 That's not a guy that

Speaker 7 this guy eats soup.

Speaker 9 Like, fuck, fuck his soup eating habits. I dispute his soup credentials.

Speaker 7 I have something that I never thought I would say, but Colin Coward's Twitter game where he's like tweeting, like, hey, had a vodka and soda tonight. Hey, just pounded two bowls of tomato bisque.

Speaker 7 Like, I'm kind of starting to like it because it's so bad.

Speaker 7 Like, he's so bad at Twitter where he's like, look at all man over here. Two bowls of tomato bisque.
No big deal at an airport.

Speaker 7 And by the way, Colin, not trying to call you out, but those are pussy ass bowls. Okay, those weren't even bowls.

Speaker 9 Okay, it was one bowl.

Speaker 7 It was a joke.

Speaker 7 It was a bull. Yeah.

Speaker 9 And he said, I ate two bowls of soup. Where's the second bowl?

Speaker 7 Well, not only that, but the bowl, it was small. It was a small bowl.
It was a tiny bowl. You know what? It was a tiny ass bowl.

Speaker 9 It was not even a bowl. That's a cup.

Speaker 9 If you're a real brothhead like me, you know soup comes in two forms, cup and bowl. That is the cup size.
A bowl size is actually, it's usually a lot deeper than that.

Speaker 9 You would think a bowl would mean that it's wide. Yeah.

Speaker 7 But no, no, no. No.

Speaker 9 When you buy soup to go, they serve it to you in almost a thermos of soup.

Speaker 7 That's what I have. That's a pussy ass bowl.
You don't even burn. Picat, what did I have?

Speaker 9 Big cat, what I have for dinner tonight.

Speaker 7 Call that a bowl. What did I have for dinner tonight? What did you have for dinner tonight? Chinese.
I saw soup.

Speaker 7 I had a bowl. A bowl of soup, and it came in a fucking third.
You had a fucking gallon of it.

Speaker 9 Guess what? I didn't do. I didn't tweet out a picture of it.

Speaker 7 Yeah, but that's kind of where he's got you, because

Speaker 7 it's so bad.

Speaker 9 No. It's so bad.

Speaker 7 What was this other one where he was like, it was like a vodka soda or something? He's like, double glass tonight.

Speaker 9 Oh, sick, dude. Oh, he went out for drinks with Rosillo.
He was like

Speaker 9 having cocktails with Rosillo. Don't come and approach us.
If you see us, just ask to take a picture and bounce out.

Speaker 9 Cool.

Speaker 7 Obviously, he was joking, like he was he was trying to be a cool guy by joking, but he wanted people to, but that's exactly what and then he had that one where he was on vacation, uh, and it was like he, his wife, and another couple in a hot tub, and it was just like, so are you guys all fucking swingers because that's all we thought about.

Speaker 7 Yes, like, you don't take a picture on vacation with another couple being like the good life in this hot tub, like, okay, so who's sucking and who's fucking here?

Speaker 7 Yeah, uh, yeah, cowards when Dolphin won the masters. Oh, yeah, Congrats on it.
Well, that's just, I actually will back up Colin there.

Speaker 7 Golf Twitter is the horniest Twitter in the world because it's a bunch of dudes, old dudes, who golf all the time, who watch golf all day, who probably don't know what internet porn is, and then they see the hot woman at the end of 18 holes and they're like, oh my God.

Speaker 7 Could you imagine like having sex with that?

Speaker 7 It's by far the horniest Twitter.

Speaker 9 And then when they're out on the course and the cart girl comes by, they're like, oh, my God, I think she liked me.

Speaker 7 There's an extra 10. She really liked her.
You know what I mean? Yeah, I mean, like half the time when there's like a corporate malfeasance, it's always at a golf outing.

Speaker 7 What were you going to say?

Speaker 9 I think AT ⁇ T Twitter is way hornier.

Speaker 7 AT ⁇ T?

Speaker 9 The commercials?

Speaker 7 There's AT ⁇ T.

Speaker 7 Yeah, it's

Speaker 7 like ads.

Speaker 9 They call them Twitter ads.

Speaker 7 There's just people going crazy.

Speaker 9 They cross the line. They keep talking about her milkers.
All right.

Speaker 7 Well, either way, Coward, we're on to your Twitter game. We'll have to clean it up when you announce you're working with us in a week.

Speaker 9 But as I was saying,

Speaker 9 before we got sidetracked, actually, I'm glad we had that conversation.

Speaker 7 Yeah, no, I am too.

Speaker 9 We needed to get that off our

Speaker 7 establish it because he's going to come in here and think he fucking owns the show. We'll be like, bro.
And PFT eats soup on the ring.

Speaker 9 Dude, I'm going to pour soup on his head. And then when he cries about it, I'm going to be like, bro, I thought you liked soup.

Speaker 9 But to go back to my point, Colin Coward's analogy about Tastem Hill would be like, a Swiss Army knife knife is great when it comes to opening a beer or when it comes to like, you know, using the scissors to trim your nails.

Speaker 9 Yeah, you need to,

Speaker 7 yeah, you need to cut your nails, you need to maybe cut your, you need a new hole in your belt, you need to start a fire, you need to, you need to

Speaker 7 fix something with your shoes, maybe screw something in. It's great.

Speaker 9 Yeah, you need to repair one of your daughter's shoes so that she can sell them online to a guy for $5,000.

Speaker 7 It's great.

Speaker 9 But you can't build a house with a Swiss Army knife.

Speaker 7 Big Cat, Dan.

Speaker 9 You can't build a house.

Speaker 7 Yeah, I love those with a Swiss Army knife. Taysom Hill is

Speaker 7 like a buffet. You go to a buffet, there's something for everyone, you know, a little pizza, a little Chinese.
You have some sushi. But are you really loving a buffet?

Speaker 7 Don't you just want to go out and get a nice steak or a couple bowls of soup at the airport chili's? That's what a real meal is. That's Drew Brees.
A buffet, that's Taysom Hill.

Speaker 7 You go out, you think it's great, you're you're leaving unsatisfied. You know what Taysom Hill is, Daniel?

Speaker 9 Taysom Hill is when you go on vacation with your two best friends, husband, wife, you get into the hot tub, you got your wife right there, she's Drew Brees.

Speaker 9 Then you got the girl and the guy, and you're thinking, one of these is Jameis Winston, the other is Taysom. This one's going to fuck me over as much as I fuck him.

Speaker 9 This one,

Speaker 9 I can party with this one for a week.

Speaker 9 I can party with, I'm not going to party with my wife. I'm going to party with this guy's wife.

Speaker 7 It's always, it's always

Speaker 7 like the most masculine. Like, Taysom Hill is the sports car you buy after your divorce.

Speaker 7 And you think it's great, and, you know,

Speaker 7 everyone's turning their head and it's new. And people say, whoa, that's crazy.
It can pass. It can run.
But guess what?

Speaker 9 Sometimes you just want...

Speaker 7 a four-door sedan. Something comfortable.
Point A to point B.

Speaker 7 That's true, Breeze.

Speaker 9 Point C is a playoffs.

Speaker 7 And all the axles are broken. Point D.
He's only want two.

Speaker 9 You want the Lombardi trophy. You can't fit a trophy into a convertible dance.

Speaker 9 Joey Molinero is much better at that.

Speaker 7 Oh, yeah. And then he tossed in.
It's a herd. Yeah.
Tune in, Barcelona Radio Series 85. Coming soon.

Speaker 7 All right. So

Speaker 9 Jalen Hurts was good.

Speaker 7 He had 160 yards rushing, 167 passing.

Speaker 7 Like that. Billy, credit to you.
Billy's now confused. He's like, wait, do we really are cowardly?

Speaker 7 Billy, credit to you. You called it last week.
Jalen Hurts adds like an energy to the Eagles team. They played with a totally different energy today.
It was very apparent. Like complimentary football.

Speaker 7 The defense looked back alive.

Speaker 7 I do think that if you're Carson Wentz, you're probably a little pissed because they gave the ball to Miles Sanders a good amount, and they also had a bunch of run plays with Jalen Hurts.

Speaker 7 You're like, wait, this was a balanced offense.

Speaker 9 what the fuck Doug well yeah yeah you probably would be I've got a take though about why sometimes when backup quarterbacks come in the whole team seems to play a little bit harder I think offensive linemen like having a backup quarterback that could take the starting job because then you get two sets of gifts around Christmas time yeah you get the starter and then you get the guys that's come in who's supplying because if you're Jalen Hurts right now you rack up a couple wins Then all of a sudden, you find yourself, you have to get them a gift.

Speaker 9 You got to get them Yeti coolers.

Speaker 9 I think that's just the traditional gift now. Yes.
It's just like a brand new cooler. And then Carson Wentz, he still has to buy those because he's the dude that's got paid.
Yeah. So

Speaker 9 you're going to be in double gift season pretty soon.

Speaker 7 For sure.

Speaker 9 But yeah, Jalen Wentz, or Jalen Hurts, he looks like,

Speaker 9 when he runs, he runs like he's going somewhere. Carson Wentz, when he runs, he runs like he's trying to get away from somewhere.

Speaker 7 Yes. Like a little scared.
Yes.

Speaker 7 They're about to get tripped up. Yeah.

Speaker 9 Wentz is scared of where he's going. Jalen Hurts has like purpose when he knows where he is.

Speaker 7 Yeah. Yeah.
The road, the road

Speaker 7 is welcome to Jalen Hurts.

Speaker 9 He knows where he's been. Yeah.

Speaker 7 That's a Matthew McConaughey commercial. Yeah.
That's pretty much the difference.

Speaker 7 Yeah, but the Saints, that's a bad loss because now they're, I think that the Packers pretty much have this set up. Like, I'm not trying to jinx them, but I am.

Speaker 7 But the Packers finished the season with

Speaker 7 the

Speaker 7 Panthers, Titans, and Bears. I mean, I guess the Titans are going to be a tough one for them, but they have the tiebreaker over the Saints, so now the Saints have to win out.

Speaker 7 The Saints have to play the Chiefs next week. Drew Brees is supposed to be back.
I would say the Packers are on the inside track here, and that's a really bad loss for the Saints.

Speaker 7 Nine-point favorites.

Speaker 7 You've got to take care of business because, especially with Drew Brees, like playing three games versus playing two games is a big fucking difference when we're talking about going to the Super Bowl.

Speaker 9 Wasn't this the game that Sean Payton game planned out in advance, even though he lost in the playoffs? Yes. It was when he lost to the

Speaker 9 Vikings, right?

Speaker 7 Yeah, and ate all the ice.

Speaker 9 Yeah, so he looked ahead and he was like, I'm going to game plan for the Eagles like I was going to play against them just because I don't know what else to do. He used that game plan for this game.

Speaker 7 Yes, I also enjoyed the Eagles.

Speaker 7 I think it was a Schefter tweet, but it was like, the Eagles intend to keep Carson Wentz. Like, well, you don't have a choice.
Yeah, well. That'd be like, I'm intending to keep my son.
They could.

Speaker 7 Well, yeah,

Speaker 7 I mean, I love my son but you are stuck with Carson Wentz. Yeah.

Speaker 9 How much do you pay your son?

Speaker 7 140 million. Oh shit.

Speaker 9 You're fucked.

Speaker 7 I inked him up. Hasn't even hit yet.
Yeah. You're going to be in cap hell in two years.
But is it just so funny to be like, oh yeah, they intend to keep him like, yeah, we know. They could.

Speaker 7 Because you can't do anything else.

Speaker 9 Why don't they pull like what the what the Texans did with the Browns?

Speaker 7 They'd have to eat sales.

Speaker 9 We'll pay two-thirds of his contract. Just please take him.

Speaker 7 They'd have to eat sales.

Speaker 9 Free to a good home, one Carson Wentz.

Speaker 7 I'd take him on the Bears. All right, next up, Falcons-Chargers.
Oh, my God. Do these two teams deserve each other? All that needs to be said about this game is the fourth quarter.
It's 17-17.

Speaker 7 The Falcons are first and 10 at the Chargers, 19 with four minutes left. Matt Ryan throws an interception two plays later.
The Chargers then take the ball. They drive a little bit.

Speaker 7 They're at midfield with a minute left. The Chargers throw an interception two plays later.
Then Matt Ryan gets the ball back. He's first and 10 at the Chargers 45.
He throws an interception.

Speaker 7 And then the Chargers finally put us all out of our,

Speaker 7 you know, just having to sit there and watch this. And they kick a field goal and win.

Speaker 7 But the fact that they traded interceptions three times in the last four minutes is the most Chargers and Falcons ending possible.

Speaker 9 It was like watching an awesome jam band go back and forth, just trading solos with each other.

Speaker 7 They were the Spider-Man.

Speaker 9 And it felt, yeah, it felt like we were on drugs watching it. It was sweet.
I hope

Speaker 9 they should engineer these matchups. Instead of playing the Bucs twice, the Falcons should play the Chargers.

Speaker 9 Twice every year. Yes.
I mean, there should be one inter-conference

Speaker 7 intra, inter,

Speaker 9 outra. There should be one externally conferenced rivalry that every team gets each year where you play your counterpart, the team that's most like you on the other side twice.

Speaker 9 And I mean, I would watch this game, it was fun to watch because of how fucked up everything was. Anthony Lynn,

Speaker 9 they ran the ball with no timeouts left at what, the 10-yard line? Yeah. And then they didn't know

Speaker 9 at the end of the first half. They didn't know how to get their offense off the field or whether their kicking team should go on the field.

Speaker 9 And Anthony Lynn, it should be noted, after last week's debacle, took over more responsibility about special teams.

Speaker 9 And then they snapped the ball when they had like 15 guys on the field and I think two guys on the line of scrimmage. Yes.
Just in case the refs didn't notice.

Speaker 7 But PFT, afterwards, he was asked about it and he said you can't run the ball in that situation yep so at least he knows he's an idiot uh-huh i like that though that he's just like you can't do it like well anthony lynn you're the head can't do it just can't run the ball in that situation you're the head coach you did that two weeks ago against the bills when you ran the ball in the same exact situation at the end of the game It's crazy.

Speaker 7 He's a panic guy. He's an ultimate panic guy.
You're panic coaches. He is a panic coach.

Speaker 9 Like we said, I think somebody taught him numbers, and that's now what he's always thinking about is what the smartest play by the book is to do. Right.

Speaker 9 When he's a football guy and he should just be like, we're going to go out here and pay, execute, and not worry about what the math says. It's insane.
It's insane. He's an insane person.

Speaker 9 He's an insane person. They need to hire somebody next year as their head coach who is going to have the ability to make...

Speaker 9 Herbert forget everything that he's learned over the last year. Hire a pothead.
Hire Chris Long. Any man.
Just smoke him out for six months. Listen to Dark Side of the Moon.

Speaker 7 Lose it all. Enjoy.

Speaker 9 just men and black yourself and erase your memory and forget everything that you've been taught because years from now,

Speaker 9 eventually we'll get far enough in the future where we're going to be able to look back and be like, Anthony Lynn was so far ahead of his time. Like the Zodiac killer, we've cracked his code.
Yeah.

Speaker 9 Figured out what he was trying to do with this offense.

Speaker 7 But for now,

Speaker 9 he has a bird inside of his head. Yeah.
He does. It's a sick bird.
Yes.

Speaker 7 We also had an awesome wildcat throw, which we just got to throw out there because we always make fun of it. Was it Russell Gage through an awesome touchdown?

Speaker 9 Is he like two for two this year?

Speaker 7 He was an awesome touchdown, and it was a Wildcat throw. So we got to throw it out there because we do joke all the time about how Wildcat is going to be a run or a pass.

Speaker 7 Oh, it's going to be a run again.

Speaker 9 Also, the Chargers' uniforms were amazing.

Speaker 10 Yeah, they were. As usual.

Speaker 7 Yeah, they were.

Speaker 7 All right, last but certainly not least, the Washington football team and the San Francisco 49ers playing in Arizona.

Speaker 7 This game, if you look at the stats, the Niners had 344 yards to Washington football teams, 193 yards.

Speaker 7 They had 21 first downs to 12, and they had five minutes more of

Speaker 7 possession. But the Washington football team, for as bad as their offense looked, their defense kicked the fuck out of the Niners.

Speaker 9 Yeah, football team's playing team football.

Speaker 7 They kicked the fucking tech out of the Ninth.

Speaker 9 The football team way, big cat.

Speaker 7 They fucking killed them.

Speaker 9 Listen, their offense sucks. It sucks, sucks, sucks.
They're bad offensively.

Speaker 7 Really bad.

Speaker 9 Like, noteworthily bad on offense. And without Antonio Gibson, they're even worse.

Speaker 9 With Antonio Gibson, the team does look a little bit different, but he's a really good player, and not having him obviously hurts.

Speaker 9 But it doesn't matter.

Speaker 9 If your defense can score two touchdowns and then get two more turnovers to set your team up with a short field, and by short, I mean like makeable field goal from where you get the ball on defense,

Speaker 9 then the Washington football team defense scored 21 points today, I believe.

Speaker 7 They were all over the field. Chase Young, obviously, is defensive rookie of the year.
They were,

Speaker 7 I mean, they kicked the shit out of the game. He's got terrible ball security, though.
He does, but they kicked the shit out of the Niners. They did.

Speaker 7 And they took sole possession of first place in the NFC Beast.

Speaker 9 Controller Destiny.

Speaker 7 Next week against the Seahawks is a huge, huge game.

Speaker 7 The Eagles aren't like.

Speaker 9 The Eagles are mathematically involved.

Speaker 7 Still involved.

Speaker 9 They're involved in the conversation.

Speaker 7 They're not, though. They're like two games out, right? No, no, no.

Speaker 9 They're definitely in.

Speaker 7 Oh, and you guys play week 17, right?

Speaker 9 So they're definitely in. I think it's like 70% chance the football team makes the football playoffs, and then the rest is split between the Giants and the Eagles.
I've got to take it.

Speaker 7 The Cardinals and the Cowboys, the Eagles have next two weeks. So,

Speaker 7 I mean, that would be, wouldn't that be great for the Washington football team and the Eagles to play for the division in week 17? Also, the Giants, like, who knows what's going to happen?

Speaker 9 And then you get a tie out of it. Yeah.
That would be be incredible. But

Speaker 9 yeah, the team defense is awesome. Montez Sweat has the coolest name, I think, in the NFL.

Speaker 9 Chase Young, it looks like he's just driving a little, a tiny car that he's crashing into people when he tackles him. Yep.
It's like very violent, but cool.

Speaker 9 When he was returning that touchdown, I did think back to Sean Taylor back in 2005, 2006, when he had those two returns for touchdowns to send to the playoffs. It looked very similar to those.

Speaker 9 The problem is, Alex Smith is injured. Well, Well, he's hurt.
Yeah. Possibly injured.
He's hurt. The x-rays came back negative, but I don't know how you interpret.

Speaker 9 There are probably two people in the United States that can interpret an Alex Jones right leg x-ray. Alex.

Speaker 9 Alex Smith. Sorry, Alex Jones.
Let's review the documents.

Speaker 7 His leg, don't tread on me.

Speaker 9 His leg's fucked up.

Speaker 9 But yeah, I don't know what you'd look at. It's like, well, this bone.
You tested negative for having X-rays.

Speaker 7 You don't have bones, sir.

Speaker 9 Sir, good news, the x-ray is negative. You don't have a shin.

Speaker 7 I'm looking at it right now, PFT, and I now see the future. So the Washington football team is going to lose the Seahawks and beat the Panthers.

Speaker 7 The Philadelphia Eagles are going to somehow win the next two games. Who do they play? They play the Cardinals and the Cowboys.

Speaker 7 You know how this has to go, though. We made fun of it at the time,

Speaker 7 but the Eagles will finish. 7-8-1,

Speaker 7 and the Washington football team will finish 7-9. No.
And that tie will be... Wouldn't that be incredible if Doug Peterson, the mastermind, playing for a tie back in whatever week it was?

Speaker 7 No, it went to the bottom. Decides the division.
No, that would not be fun at all. Jesus Christ, that would be incredible.

Speaker 9 I think, you know what?

Speaker 7 I kind of am mad at the Washington football team for winning today because.

Speaker 9 I'll never apologize for it.

Speaker 7 Well, no, I know, but imagine if all these, all four teams with one game of each other.

Speaker 9 Listen, it's way funnier if the winner of the NFC Beast gets in with a losing record. That's what I'm really hoping for.
I think that'd be awesome.

Speaker 7 But

Speaker 9 what if the football team rested their starters next week?

Speaker 7 Against the Seahawks. They punted on it.
And that's going to be

Speaker 7 talking about Alex Smith. What are you going to do?

Speaker 9 Bad things happen when the football team plays against the Seahawks.

Speaker 7 You should just punt.

Speaker 9 In rally down,

Speaker 7 it happens.

Speaker 9 It's bad. You should just punt.
Like, they've knocked us out of the playoffs twice in the last 15 years.

Speaker 9 The RG3 game.

Speaker 7 You should just punt. Just get punted.
Punt on every single game.

Speaker 9 Wildcat to Tressway

Speaker 9 the entire time. Punt.
Get rid of the ball. If you rest your starters, you take the loss.
You get healthier. Maybe Antonio Gibson's turf toe is good to go

Speaker 9 the following week, and then you beat the Panthers, then maybe you beat the Eagles, then maybe you're going on a little run, you make some noise. You got a home game.

Speaker 9 You got a home game in the playoffs.

Speaker 9 And next thing you know, you're up in Lambeau.

Speaker 7 Yeah, that's true. Kicking the shit out of Aaron Rodgers, those soft-ass Packers.

Speaker 7 All right.

Speaker 9 I do like how in Arizona now they've switched the midfield logo. So we have the shield there.
We've got the NFL shield is at the 50-yard line. Yes.
Because it's being shared by two teams.

Speaker 9 You've got that in New York. And then I think you still probably have that in Carolina, right?

Speaker 7 Or did I change it? Yeah, yeah. They might have changed it.

Speaker 9 They're spitting on Mr. Richardson's statue.

Speaker 7 You need the logo.

Speaker 7 All right. Let's do.
We're going to do some college football talk in a minute here.

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Speaker 7 Point it. Okay.
College football, and then we'll do some football, guy, some who's back, and then we'll send everyone on their way.

Speaker 7 Florida, the shoe game, that was such an awesome college football game between the swamp, the fog, like LSU being bad, but fighting, Florida sitting Kyle Pitts, which like I still, the ellipses that he put out,

Speaker 7 that feels like something's cooking in Gainesville. Everything in front of him for Florida, an all-time college football loss.

Speaker 7 Like college football losses, they just seem to hurt way more because because they just everything in front of you and then one loss can just destroy your entire season and everything that Florida had built this year wiped away and all the bad stuff that LSU had wiped away.

Speaker 7 Was the game actually over? What do you mean? No, it was a tie game. So if you didn't watch, it was a tie game.

Speaker 7 Florida's driving.

Speaker 7 Sorry, LSU is

Speaker 7 midfield. It's third down.
Florida makes the stop. So LSU is going to have to punt.
It's a tie game with like two minutes left.

Speaker 9 There's enough time left that they wouldn't necessarily have gone for it. Right.

Speaker 7 They would have kicked away.

Speaker 7 Florida player picks up the LSU guy's shoe that had fallen off and throws it 20 yards down the field, and they throw a flag, multiple flags, basically giving LSU a first down, and then LSU gets a couple more yards.

Speaker 7 It was Cade York.

Speaker 7 Bombs a fucking kick in the fog, like 50-plus. Absolutely.
Cool Tracy. Perfect.
No, it wasn't Cole Tracy. I know, but.
But it wasn't. You like respecting Cole Tracy.

Speaker 7 Bombs it, and Florida actually came back and almost had a chance to win it. But the shoe game, literally that shoe changed Florida's season.
They were going to maybe play for the SEC.

Speaker 7 They're still going to play for the SEC championship, but they were going to maybe play for a spot in the college football playoff. Now it's pretty tough, all because he threw a shoe.

Speaker 7 And I also felt really old when I said, who threw a shoe, and no one was like... Oh, that's from Austin.

Speaker 9 I mean, that was the whole timeline.

Speaker 7 Right, I know, but I feel like a lot of people didn't get that because it's a long time ago.

Speaker 9 Yeah, there was that, and then there was the of the George Bush getting hit by the shoe.

Speaker 9 And that dude that threw the shoe found out about this play and like quote-tweeted it today and was like, oh my God, look at this guy. Yeah.
So the shoe thrower was impressed by this. And Dan Mullen,

Speaker 9 to his credit,

Speaker 9 this is an awesome, awesome spin zone, and I find myself agreeing with it. He said that.
Marco Wilson didn't have an intent to taunt by throwing their shoe. I think it should be legal to throw a shoe.

Speaker 7 I actually agree with this. Why can't you throw a shoe?

Speaker 9 I actually agree with it. When somebody explained that to me, first of all, you're right.
It was not a taunting.

Speaker 7 No, it was excitement.

Speaker 9 It was excitement, and it was also like, there's a shoe here. I hope somebody doesn't trip on it.

Speaker 7 You better throw it that way. That was a big tackle excitement shoe.

Speaker 9 You should be allowed to throw your opponent's shoes. I agree.
If they're already off, you should not be allowed to remove the shoe. You shouldn't be allowed to untie the shoe and take it off.

Speaker 9 No, I take it back. You should be allowed to remove the shoe.
You shouldn't be allowed to untie it and then remove it.

Speaker 9 If you're strong enough that you take it off in the course of a tackle intentionally, you should be allowed to do that. And then you should be allowed to throw the shoe as far as you want.

Speaker 9 It makes no sense that you're not allowed to throw a shoe.

Speaker 7 And salty, salty Dan Mullen. He's top of the list for salty head coaches.

Speaker 7 It's like him and Scott Frost are having the saltiest seasons because he's had a ton of times where he was complaining about Texas AM having a bunch of fans and how he wanted to pack the swamp.

Speaker 7 But Dan Mullen

Speaker 7 being like, well, it's because we play more games and everyone else is a coward.

Speaker 7 So I agree with it in a weird way that, like, yes, of course, if you play 10 games, there's more of a chance that you're going to lose a game.

Speaker 9 What happened at the start of their season?

Speaker 7 Right. That's the part that I don't know if Florida fans are just forgetting about that, but if so, the argument is Ohio State's 5-0.

Speaker 7 If they had to play a 10-game schedule, they would eventually have a freaky game like that last night

Speaker 7 where they would lose. Okay,

Speaker 7 but Florida lost to Texas AM in their third game lost to LSU in their last game no matter how you break up their five game schedule actually no you know what if they only played games four through nine they would be in four through nine they'd be five and oh yeah so but you already have a loss you already have a loss I've got the short-term memory of a goldfish and I vividly that's the first thing I thought of was like Florida lost at the start of the year they have a loss

Speaker 7 that wasn't a loss like that it would make sense if you played 10 games and you lost on the last game of the season and it was a fluky loss and your 23-point favorite, which guess what, Dan Mullen?

Speaker 7 That's on you, dude. Like, you're 23-point favorite.
You have Kyle Pitts. You sat him.
I don't know if he's hurt. I think it was kind of a resting thing, not taking him seriously.

Speaker 7 You're playing against a freshman quarterback. Shout out Brad Johnson's son.

Speaker 7 Brad Johnson, all-time fat face. Love that guy.
Just a big-ass face.

Speaker 9 He wore a big helmet. Yeah.
And he had the

Speaker 9 face mask.

Speaker 9 His face mask was a double bar one, but it went down like below his chin. Yeah, he didn't really, it it protected his neck more than anything.

Speaker 7 He looked like one of those artists you see on like the Vegas Strip or like Central Park who draws you like with a huge face and a little body. Yeah, that's what that's his face.

Speaker 7 But that's all on you, Dan Mullen. You lost that game.
You already had lost the game. Like, sorry, man.

Speaker 7 I totally agree with you that the Big Ten has fucked up their schedule. The Pac-12 has fucked up their schedule.
The fact that they haven't played a full schedule is stupid.

Speaker 7 They should have started in September and had built-in bye weeks. No argument there.
Where I lost you is the fact that you already had lost.

Speaker 7 So you can't say, well, this was the game, like, and you still had to beat Bama. You're not going to beat Bama.
I'm sorry, you're not going to beat Bama.

Speaker 9 But Den Mullen also said that

Speaker 9 he said today that Mac Jones was a great game manager for Alabama. So he's already digging in.
He's a salty one.

Speaker 7 I like how salty. He's a salty one.
He is a salty-ass coach.

Speaker 9 He's jealous that his wife's making out with all his players. So he's got a little extra level of spice.
And the.

Speaker 7 You know what he is, though? He's the per I love love head coaches where, so head coaches in college football are the master of their universe. They are the biggest ticket in town.

Speaker 7 They run the whole place. They run the campus, the cops, everything.
They are literally the king of a little tiny world where no one can tell them, like, hey, you can't do that.

Speaker 7 And then when things don't go their way, they immediately turn into like five-year-olds that complain about everything.

Speaker 7 And the best part is when you get a coach like Dan Mullen who can't help himself, who doesn't have like the wherewithal to stop himself from saying things.

Speaker 7 And he just is like, the best way to handle this is to whine out loud. And surely that will look good.

Speaker 9 I think he thinks that he's Nick Sabin. He thinks that he's got like a couple natties under his belt.
Right. Like he's got.

Speaker 7 Dabo does this though like once a year. Yeah.
Where he'll be like, oh, yeah, Florida stay forfeited. They're cowards.

Speaker 7 Dabo, don't say that.

Speaker 9 He wants to be Dabo. He looks at Dabo and he's like, this is, that's who I am.
Yeah. I'm going to be that of Florida.

Speaker 9 And it doesn't work for him because he doesn't have, but he doesn't have the hardware to back it up.

Speaker 9 And in this specific scenario, it's like, dude, you lost early in the season to a better team than you. And can you imagine Ohio State getting beaten right now by LSU? Right.
In Columbus?

Speaker 9 I couldn't imagine it. No.
I think Ohio State would beat the shit out of Florida.

Speaker 9 They would fucking curb stomp Florida right now.

Speaker 7 You overlooked them. You overlooked LSU.

Speaker 9 And did. That game was pretty sweet, though, because the fog.

Speaker 7 Oh, the actors were like,

Speaker 9 I think they can see fine down on the field, but we can't see from up here no it was like a cloud yes it was like yeah I do love

Speaker 7 I will say something nice about Florida I like when Florida's in the mix there's something about the swamp there's something about the colors I love the color of their uniforms the gate it does suck we've said this before but when you have the gator chomp and then people can do it to you

Speaker 7 like a kicker doing it to you Jake, you're a Florida fan, right?

Speaker 7 Yeah,

Speaker 13 it's tough. People do the same thing with the Seminole.

Speaker 7 Yeah. Yeah.
The chop. The chop.
Yeah. The horns down.

Speaker 9 Horns down.

Speaker 7 Horns down. It's always tough.
When you have something people could do.

Speaker 7 But yeah, I just love college coaches getting in front of a microphone and being like, I'm going to explain this away by being really, really whiny about it.

Speaker 7 I mean, Scott Satterfield, we talked about him last week. Like, when they just start talking and they can't stop talking because they are the kings of their world.

Speaker 7 And usually, 99.9% of the time, when they talk or tell someone something, they will just buy it no matter what. And then one person.

Speaker 7 It's usually the highest paid public, like state employees inside that state.

Speaker 9 So they are a warlord. And then they exist in like, and they have their own cops.

Speaker 7 Right. They are

Speaker 7 warlords. And then they have their one moment where they lose a very bad game and they're like, I'm going to just be mad about it.
And it always, it just makes you laugh every time.

Speaker 9 I would love it if like one college coach, maybe Dan Mullen would do something like this, but like designed his own military style outfit like a dictator actually wears.

Speaker 7 I I think he would.

Speaker 9 And comes out with like ribbons on his chest.

Speaker 7 And like a hat.

Speaker 9 The hat and the sunglasses and the pins and the shoulder things with the golden frills on them.

Speaker 7 Makes everyone stand for him and attention.

Speaker 9 I mean, Lane Kiflin would look good in a dictator's outfit.

Speaker 7 I actually, I don't think that that's too unreasonable, especially because most of these college coaches have like 10 kids anyway. They have little child soldiers in their house.
Yeah.

Speaker 7 They just put them out too.

Speaker 9 They have a literal band of child soldiers, young adult soldiers. Yes.

Speaker 7 That play for them. Here we go.

Speaker 9 God, that'd be so fucking cool.

Speaker 7 I mean, they did it in Miami when they wore the fatigues. That's true.
We need to, God,

Speaker 9 I'm not going to be able to fall asleep tonight. I'm just going to be like imagining

Speaker 9 Mac Brown walking out with like a corncob pipe, aviators and driving like an old school Jeep. Yeah, with absolutely no doors on it.

Speaker 9 Even the windshield has been removed.

Speaker 7 Pulling up with 10 people in it. His entire staff is in the Jeep.

Speaker 9 Yeah, a revolver on each hip.

Speaker 7 All right.

Speaker 7 Other games.

Speaker 7 Shout out our guy, Keaton Slovis, the pardon I take bump.

Speaker 7 Clay Helton's an idiot. He was trying to run the ball there at the end of the game.
So Keaton saw that it was man-to-man and threw a touchdown pass against UCLA and covered the spread.

Speaker 9 Yeah, he was throwing dimes out there in the fourth quarter. He was awesome.

Speaker 9 Do you have any criticism of him? Because we can't gas him up. Remember, he has to.

Speaker 9 He missed some reads early in the game watching the game footage, but it was actually a pretty stellar player.

Speaker 7 No, don't, don't. Okay, he missed some reads.

Speaker 9 He put himself in a hole.

Speaker 7 Yeah, he put himself in a hole. I noticed he actually wasn't defending his team when they almost had a brawl at the end of the game.

Speaker 9 Yeah, he didn't get involved in the scuffle. Yeah, he was like team guy move.
He was like joking and laughing and walking away from it. I saw that too.

Speaker 7 Dang him on the draft board. No, but USC just plays the same game every week now where they just go down and then they come back late in a dramatic fashion.

Speaker 9 Is the pack too chill to complain when they don't get a team into the Colorado playoffs?

Speaker 7 It's more that they're just kind of used to it now. Yeah.
It's been a while.

Speaker 9 I haven't heard any saltiness out of West Coast fans.

Speaker 7 I want to say,

Speaker 7 so obviously, Oregon went and lost to Ohio State

Speaker 7 that year that they beat Jameis with the crazy fumble. Yeah.
And then also they lost Auburn, I want to say. So they beat it in twice.
Washington went once and got smoked by Alabama.

Speaker 7 But I think that's it. I think they've only had it three times.

Speaker 9 But they're not even trying to act like if

Speaker 9 USC goes undefeated, why aren't they getting any talk? I haven't heard of

Speaker 7 a single person. There's been a little bit of talk, but you can see it in the polls that the committee never even

Speaker 7 thought about that right because they have them ranked in like 15th or something the committee polls are just a joke at this point they have Iowa State ranked seventh and uh Louisiana who beat Iowa State by 17 I want to say ranked like 19th so it doesn't really matter okay Washington was in it in 2016 2017 I remember that was the that was when they switched it to

Speaker 7 New Year's night and it was like ooh this is gonna be great New Year's Eve is like this is gonna be great and then it was just I think Michigan State played one of the games too and got absolutely didn't score and we're just like, well, this sucks.

Speaker 9 That was a shit. No, it was, yeah, Michigan State, Oklahoma, Alabama.

Speaker 7 Yeah.

Speaker 9 Clemson. That was 2015.

Speaker 7 Yeah.

Speaker 7 So that was, there were some good college football games. Next Saturday is going to be awesome.
I'm very, very excited. MAC Championships kicks us off on Friday night.
Watch out for Buffalo.

Speaker 7 Their beasts. Oh, and that Western Michigan play.
Did you guys see that? That was the most maxion thing ever. I should count that.
That should absolutely count.

Speaker 7 All right, should we do

Speaker 7 some Football Guy of the Week and then baby Braun, and then we'll get out of here with who's back of the week. Football Guy of the Week.

Speaker 13 So, Football Guy of the Week, first up, Pactors, offensive tackle, David Bakhtiari. Okay.

Speaker 13 He showed pride in a tweet after running down the field after Aaron Jones during last week's win over the Eagles. Kind of have to see it to not believe it, but see it to understand the context.

Speaker 9 I saw the play. The play was, I mean, it was a great hustle play on his part, but he didn't really do anything.

Speaker 9 He just kind of like ran down the field and was looking for somebody to block, and he couldn't block anyone, so he just kept running.

Speaker 7 Right.

Speaker 13 I should reiterate the tweet itself, for the guys coming in

Speaker 13 at the last second mark on gassers, for the kids that have worn a t-shirt to the pool, for the guys who have to order an appetizer with an Andre, I didn't run for me. I ran for us.

Speaker 13 Anything is possible. Go 69, go.

Speaker 9 Yeah, he's an underrated 69 guy. Yes.

Speaker 9 He's actually more about that 69 life than Gronk is.

Speaker 13 Next, a recurring nominee, Sarah Fuller, ran real cooker, but not for football. Of course, the point was historic, and that was great, but she took a smelling salt, right, to coming to the sidelines.

Speaker 9 She ripped it, too. Yeah.

Speaker 7 She liked

Speaker 7 Billy liked the form.

Speaker 9 It was like a couple lines of smelling salt. And she's, I'm just going to say this once.
She's bigger than Billy. She's like 6'2.5.

Speaker 9 She could beat the shit out of Billy. I've been looking at pictures of Billy football when he's standing next to Dave Portnoy, when you stand next to PFT Cometer.
He's not that tall.

Speaker 9 So Sarah Fuller, taller than Billy, would absolutely kick the shit out of you.

Speaker 7 Yes.

Speaker 13 FightFuller.com.

Speaker 7 FightFuller.com. Two Fuller.com.

Speaker 7 FightFuller.com.

Speaker 9 He would absolutely kick the shit out of me.

Speaker 7 Yeah. Of course.
Shout out to all the people who just can't just let a moment happen and have to be like, this is bullshit.

Speaker 9 It means something in our culture war.

Speaker 9 It was cool.

Speaker 7 It's made of

Speaker 7 balls.

Speaker 7 If you're that threatened by that, like, Jesus fucking Christ, man. Find a new hobby.
Do something else.

Speaker 7 You can't let Sarah Fuller kicking an extra point ruin your entire day.

Speaker 9 You cannot. A Saturday.

Speaker 7 You cannot.

Speaker 9 A Saturday.

Speaker 7 It makes you a small dick guy.

Speaker 7 Imagine being so angry at that that you have to be so. It's actually hilarious because you get.

Speaker 9 Listen, you're watching football and you get so mad that you walk across the room to the computer and say actually why it's bad.

Speaker 7 Just

Speaker 7 people enjoy things. And then you take a tweezers

Speaker 7 out of your little desk cabinet and

Speaker 7 you just start jerking off your little tiny penis for the rest of the day.

Speaker 13 Texas A ⁇ M linebacker

Speaker 13 Buddy Johnson, when asked where he would rank the Aggies, he said he has no idea, but he said, I can tell you what time we practice today.

Speaker 9 I mean, just for the name alone. Yeah.
That's a football. What a football name.
Buddy Johnson.

Speaker 7 Means, hang on.

Speaker 9 Docking.

Speaker 7 Yeah.

Speaker 13 Lastly, Giants defensive coordinator Patrick Graham, when asked about potential head coaching interests, he said, I'm not smart enough to think ahead of today.

Speaker 13 I've got to get ready for third down against Arizona.

Speaker 7 There we go. And that didn't really work out.
No.

Speaker 7 No. That did not work.
So vote in the pool. Yeah.

Speaker 7 By the way, shout out Arizona Wildcats, who you lost so bad that you had to fire your coach. That game was so bad.

Speaker 13 The blowouts in the social media, they need to talk about that.

Speaker 7 Oh, my God. It's my favorite thing in the entire world.
That poor kid who they put on that graphic card.

Speaker 7 I want to interview. Actually, I would love, let's set that up.
So

Speaker 7 a social media editor for a team, college or NFL, please hit us up. But you have to have like

Speaker 7 four or five times that you can show us that you've had to tweet. Just an absolute shellacking.
And I want to talk to you for 10 minutes about what goes through your head when you have to do that.

Speaker 9 I'm pretty sure it's like a branded thing where they have to guarantee a minimum amount of posts that have like a picture with their sponsors yeah handle on it yeah it's like

Speaker 9 it's also listen they're not dumb they know that it's good for engagement but i want to talk to the year yeah they have to be like and we had four tweets this month that got an average of 2.5 thousand replies to them because we got beat by our in-state rivals by by 63 points i just like i just like final yeah final so i we want to talk to that person so so let's uh

Speaker 7 if you are that person and you can prove that you've had to do it like four or five times, we would like to have a 10-minute conversation with you with everything that goes through your head, whether you look at the mentions, et cetera, et cetera.

Speaker 9 All right.

Speaker 7 Babe Braun of the Week. Hank, your Babe Braun of the Week.

Speaker 10 Apparently, there's a guy in the Lakers named Talon.

Speaker 7 Oh. Taylor Horton Tucker.
There we go. Talon Horton Tucker.
Wait, where did he go to school? Oh, Jake didn't know. Wow.

Speaker 7 Subscribe to the bench mob where you can get knowledge like that all the time.

Speaker 13 Iow State.

Speaker 7 I enjoyed.

Speaker 10 So he tweeted.

Speaker 10 He's on the Lakers. He had like 19 points one of the preseason.

Speaker 7 Car Forman's so mad that he didn't draft him.

Speaker 10 LeBron tweeted, which I enjoyed this baby brawn because I think it's a little bit of a sub-tweet, kind of like at Kyle Kuzma, but it was like, telling you right now, this kid is flat out special, mark my words.

Speaker 10 So it's like, you know, it's not just he's gassing up his teammates. LeBron's also the coach in the GM.

Speaker 7 So if he's saying that about this kid,

Speaker 10 then Kyle Kuzma is also like, oh, what the fuck.

Speaker 9 And a sports junkie, regardless of his own sport, he's plays. Correct.

Speaker 7 True. Correct.
Just his thoughts.

Speaker 9 uh pfd you have a baby braun my baby braun is derrick henry but not because lebron is claiming him

Speaker 9 because derrick henry has i guess he sunned himself derrick henry sunned himself sun cucked lebron james did the lebron celebration we scored that touchdown the three high knees and then the chest slap yeah and then lebron saw it online and hank we should actually put the audio in here lebron james watching derrick henry do the lebron celebration and the grunts that he makes while he's because you can tell LeBron is standing up at the time and emulating Derrick Henry emulating LeBron James.

Speaker 9 Right.

Speaker 7 Yeah, King.

Speaker 7 Yeah, King.

Speaker 7 Let's go.

Speaker 9 And nothing makes him happier in the entire world than that. And so Derrick Henry has forced himself into the LeBron family.
That's a big mouth to feed on Taco Tuesday.

Speaker 7 Huge mouth.

Speaker 9 So you're going to to want to expand the budget a little bit for your shopping. But yeah, Derrick Henry is Baby Braun of the Week.

Speaker 7 All right. My Baby Braun is, I think we've had this a couple weeks, but Baby Braun, because ESPN just stole it from us.

Speaker 7 Now I know they didn't actually steal it from us, but so LeBron, I think it was the anniversary of the first time LeBron was on ESPN.

Speaker 7 It was like maybe 20 years ago. And the headlines said, Baby Braun.

Speaker 9 Yep, they know what they're doing.

Speaker 7 They know exactly what they're doing. So baby braun gets the baby brawn of the week for me.
So, yeah, and Dickie V just losing his mind. Okay, are you serious?

Speaker 9 Yeah, because baby brawn threw a pass behind his baby

Speaker 7 brawn back, exactly. Yeah, yeah, it's just a baby brawn everywhere.
But yeah, I saw that and I was like, you motherfuckers.

Speaker 7 Like, of course, you get to do it because you did actually have the rights to baby braun,

Speaker 9 but still, that wasn't baby braun.

Speaker 7 You know what you're doing. That was preteen.

Speaker 9 That was

Speaker 9 16-year-old Braun.

Speaker 7 Yeah, we're making baby braun big, and then you just hopped on and we're like, hey, Baby Braun of the Week, Baby Braun.

Speaker 9 I don't think I can think of a more ESPN thing to say than they just tweeted out the anniversary of LeBron James appearing for the first time on ESPN.

Speaker 7 Yeah, no, it's look at this. On this date, Baby Braun makes ESPN debut.

Speaker 9 That's a Jake Marsh on this day in sports. Uh-huh.

Speaker 7 Literally, Baby Braun. God.
Fuck you, ESPN. We know what you're doing.

Speaker 9 They're distancing themselves from our content.

Speaker 7 Sasha Obama. Whoa,

Speaker 7 whoa, dude. Yeah.
Why?

Speaker 9 She's just blown up Twitter.

Speaker 7 Yeah, for what? For

Speaker 9 being baby Brown of the Week. What did she do, baby? What?

Speaker 9 No, she's just been trending. Why? Why?

Speaker 7 Because she's.

Speaker 7 You don't know. Why?

Speaker 9 Billy, this is...

Speaker 7 Why are you almighty?

Speaker 7 I was doing lack of preparation. Chase Young, he went off.
Okay, cool. Yeah.

Speaker 7 Okay.

Speaker 13 Billy, do you check why Sasha Obama is trying to do it?

Speaker 7 I don't know, Billy. I I don't know why.

Speaker 7 All right, I'm looking up right now.

Speaker 9 We're all going to find out together. Uh-oh.

Speaker 9 This new Sasha Obama photo tearing through Twitter is so stunning.

Speaker 7 Herein lies

Speaker 7 daddy issues.

Speaker 7 So you do know.

Speaker 9 She took a picture that made Billy horny.

Speaker 7 Mm-hmm.

Speaker 7 Thanks, Billy.

Speaker 9 All right, Billy. She's 19.

Speaker 7 All right, let's finish up. Actually, you're what?

Speaker 9 21? Yeah, you're 21. Okay.

Speaker 9 That's fine.

Speaker 7 Let's finish up with Who's Back of the Week.

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Speaker 7 All right, who's back of the week? Hank.

Speaker 10 Who's back of the week is NBA players in general, Jason Tatum being 19. So Jason Tatum apparently grew.
He did doing a little Kevin Durant. I guess the opposite of Kevin Durant.

Speaker 10 He's listed as 6'10 this year. Pratt Stevens says he's grown a couple inches.

Speaker 9 No, that is a Kevin Durant. You get an inch taller every year.

Speaker 10 No, but Kevin Durant does that. He's taller than he lifts himself.
Kevin Durant weirdly does the opposite.

Speaker 7 Huh. But

Speaker 7 Kevin Durant refuses to say that he's a seven-footer.

Speaker 9 Right. Right.
So, like, I guess LeBron does that. He's gone from, like, 6'7 to 6'8 to 6'9, and then he gets like 10 pounds heavier every year, too.

Speaker 10 Speaking of Kevin Durant, though, he's also back in the news.

Speaker 10 Him and Kyrie Irving did an Instagram live on Saturday night, which was one of the craziest, given the fact that Kyrie Irving is not doing media this year or whatever. He says he's getting fine.

Speaker 10 He's like, I'm too important for media sessions. Like, that doesn't phase me.

Speaker 9 He doesn't talk to pawns.

Speaker 7 Did this Instagram live where I couldn't tell if they were trolling or something? I think they're not trolling.

Speaker 7 I think they were. I think it's one of those things.
I don't know.

Speaker 10 I really couldn't tell. I had to give it some honest, honest thought because they're talking about how many post-ups per games Kyrie's going to get.
And he's like, you know,

Speaker 10 I'll get 10. And Kevin Durant's like, no, we agreed to two and a half.
And

Speaker 10 the half is just you going into the post and kicking it back out to me. And they were clearly arguing, so it's like, if they were trolling, it's funny.
But if they're not trolling,

Speaker 10 everyone was obviously the reaction is like, this is going to be a disaster. This team's not going to work.
They're just going to fight the whole time.

Speaker 7 I feel like they're trolling.

Speaker 10 So if they're trolling, it's funny, but I don't know. I really don't know.
Especially with Kyrie. Like, he's so.

Speaker 9 He is weird. I think I've decided to just.

Speaker 7 Like, he was sitting too, like he was meditating.

Speaker 10 Like, the way he was sitting was just giving me the weirdest vibes.

Speaker 9 I think I'm going to become a Kyrie guy and just take everything that he says as 100% the truth.

Speaker 7 Well, he's just like, I don't know. He's tough.
30 years from now, we might look back and be like,

Speaker 10 I can't wait to come back to Boston.

Speaker 7 But Kyrie is getting dangerously close to that territory where I'm going to start liking him because he makes so many people mad. Yeah.

Speaker 7 Like when he gets everyone pissed off,

Speaker 7 if he continues to get everyone pissed off, I'm just going to be like, I kind of like a disruptor. He's a disruptor.

Speaker 9 He definitely thinks of himself as a disruptor.

Speaker 7 Yeah, he thinks that's the only problem.

Speaker 9 He thinks he's the basketball Steve Jobs.

Speaker 7 I'm not hopping all the way in because of that self-awareness.

Speaker 9 But, big cat, what if, like, okay, think about it. What's the harm in going with everything that Kyrie Irving says and believes?

Speaker 9 I'd rather believe him him and have him be wrong than not believe him and have him be right. Yeah.
Like, what if the earth, what's the harm in me believing that the earth is flat? None.

Speaker 7 Absolutely none. None.
So I think we're a Kyrie podcast. I think we are.
Yeah. I think we just talked ourselves two out of three.

Speaker 9 Is he getting dangerously skinny?

Speaker 7 He looks like

Speaker 7 vegan.

Speaker 7 Yeah. Oh, Billy.
Oh, Billy.

Speaker 9 Not good. Yikes.

Speaker 7 Not good. Uh-oh.
All right. PFT, your who's back?

Speaker 9 My who's back of the week is United States soccer.

Speaker 7 Oh,

Speaker 9 soccer's back big time. No, well, in a way, we did because Gio Reyna, I think he's Claudio Reyna's son, longtime captain of

Speaker 9 he had that nice assist back in 2002 against Mexico. I remember that.
Sounds good. Gio Reyna scored an amazing goal, a cracker, world-class.
No, you can't say racist stuff like that.

Speaker 9 Fredo of a goal. And him and Pusilic

Speaker 9 are tearing up European soccer. So I'm confident in the U.S.'s chances in 2022 in Qatar.

Speaker 7 We're finally back.

Speaker 9 I think we're back. Freddy Du.
Finally back. Come on board, buddy.
We missed you.

Speaker 7 All right, my who's back of the week is

Speaker 7 end of the year prep diets. We're going to get back into it, boys.
You've got to prep yourself before we get to January 1. I told you, Billy, I'm going to get back in the gym tomorrow.

Speaker 7 This is the time. This is the time.
You give yourself a little lead up. And then you're ready to go.
Because guess what? What do they say about January 1st? Amateur season, right?

Speaker 9 Amateur hour.

Speaker 7 I've got to try to get in the gym before that.

Speaker 9 Yeah, it's like the people that go out to bars on New Year's Eve.

Speaker 7 Right, right. So I'm going to tell you.
I'm telling you, a cool guy, he's in bars every single night.

Speaker 7 Every time.

Speaker 7 Here's what you got to do.

Speaker 7 You have three weeks until New Year's. You got to

Speaker 7 do, I would say at least three times you need to go for a little jog. Okay.

Speaker 7 Maybe eat a couple salads and tell yourself you're priming yourself up so that on January 1st, you're not going to shock your system when you actually do try to get on that.

Speaker 9 It's actually dangerous if you go to the gym on January 1st.

Speaker 7 So I'm going to start hitting the gym, gonna make sure I warm myself up. This is the time.

Speaker 9 Left side only for you, big cat. Yeah, then you right side.

Speaker 7 You hit the ground running and you're ready to go. January 1st.

Speaker 9 Look what side faces the camera for us.

Speaker 7 Yes, yes.

Speaker 9 We'll be just a swole-ass podcast.

Speaker 7 Really?

Speaker 9 My Zoo Back of the Week is

Speaker 9 my who's back of the week is Tyreek Hill having a bad impact on the kids.

Speaker 7 Oh, this

Speaker 9 Iowa State wide receiver, Amir Smith Marcet,

Speaker 9 back flipped into the end zone and sprained his ankle.

Speaker 7 And that was influenced Iowa.

Speaker 9 Was influenced by Tyreek Hill flipping into the end zone for the past couple weeks. And

Speaker 9 we have an injury because of it. So he's a bad influence on the kids.
How about DK Metcalf being a bad influence, too? Going into the stands, taking a cameraman's job.

Speaker 7 Sat in the camera, focusing on somebody can't have it. True.
Showed it's not. Can't have it.
Yeah.

Speaker 7 All right. We could switch positions.
Numbers.

Speaker 7 Numbers. Eight.
Eighteen.

Speaker 7 Seven. Do you know who's back, Jake?

Speaker 13 Changing team names. The Cleveland Baseball team.

Speaker 7 Oh, yeah. That's right.
The Spiders, babies.

Speaker 9 The Cleveland Baseball team. I like that, Jake.

Speaker 7 I like the bidding. You have a partner to dance with, Beth.
Yeah. Yeah.
I like the spiders.

Speaker 10 Teams are going to get kicked out of their sport if they don't have a mascot.

Speaker 9 Our mascot is a fucking football team, Hank.

Speaker 7 No, it's not. Oh, my.

Speaker 7 Oh, Hank. There's everything.
Are you in the hunt?

Speaker 9 I only listen to people's opinions who are in the hunt. You're not in the hunt.
The football team is. Big cat's in the hunt.
I'll respect his opinion.

Speaker 9 Despite the hunting. Until such time as when they are not in the hunt.

Speaker 7 Who's they?

Speaker 9 The football team. You know exactly who the football team is.

Speaker 7 I can't wait till the New Yorker writes an article in like five years being like white supremacists have adopted the old Cleveland Indians gear. Oh, and yeah, they will.

Speaker 7 They know how to spot a white supremacist. I'm in for the Spiders.

Speaker 9 What about the Cleveland Bronze?

Speaker 7 Ooh, the baby bronze.

Speaker 9 Because they don't have dubs. She's a little bit.

Speaker 13 And you sell baby jerseys.

Speaker 7 Yeah. Baby bronze.
Yeah. All right, 28.

Speaker 7 18, 18. 46.

Speaker 9 46 for 9. 9.

Speaker 7 Go, Billy. 81.
28. I'm not going to get it.
What?

Speaker 9 I'm trying not to get that. Did you bring back the 69?

Speaker 7 I'm trying not to get it. Nope.
You're cursed.

Speaker 7 100. Oh, shit.
Oh, yeah. Oh, wow.
I didn't even know who had 100! No, that's like on roulette. And it fell out of the thing.
Oh, my God. Imagine if you had gotten 100.

Speaker 9 Too many digits.

Speaker 7 Wow.

Speaker 7 I didn't even know that happened.

Speaker 9 What a twist ending to this show. In the ice age, there used to be beavers eight feet tall and

Speaker 9 200 plus pounds.

Speaker 7 You know that random people

Speaker 7 big old beavers.

Speaker 7 No, dude.

Speaker 9 I saw that. I had a great joke that I didn't use right there.
Just for the record. What?

Speaker 10 No, did you also block Nate's comment on Twitter Twitter from being blocked?

Speaker 7 Oh, come on. Oh, you did? What do you think? He said, they called him a pussy until he blocked it.

Speaker 7 But you didn't realize everyone could see that. That I hit it.
Yeah.

Speaker 7 I don't want to be fighting with Nate. Like, what the f?

Speaker 7 a mad day to find you Shy in a way

Speaker 7 Oh, I've been coming for your love of King

Speaker 7 Shy in a way

Speaker 7 Oh, I've been coming for your love of King Take

Speaker 7 on

Speaker 7 me

Speaker 7 Take

Speaker 7 me

Speaker 7 I'll be

Speaker 7 God

Speaker 7 for