Mark Ingram & Cam Jordan, Week 4 Preview, NBA & MLB Playoffs

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Speaker 1 On today's part of my take, we have Cam Jordan and Mark Ingram together. Big trust levels.
Levels.

Speaker 1 Trust. Kept on doing that through the whole interview.
It was so fucking good. Trust intensified.
Levels.

Speaker 1 Levels to the trusts.

Speaker 1 Week four preview. Liam's laughing at me.
I expected that. It doesn't hurt my feelings.
He's pretty much saying you're an old fucking loser and you shouldn't be doing hip sayings like trust.

Speaker 1 Again, I expected that. Fernando Tatis Jr.
Yabo. That just happened.
That was live. Whew.
What's that felt like?

Speaker 1 Decent. Okay, how mad

Speaker 1 are Cardinals? Fuck the Cardinals. That was actually sick.

Speaker 1 So we have that live. We have some Thursday night.
We'll talk about Joe Flacco. Got in.

Speaker 1 Weekend preview, Fantasy Fuck Boys, Fire Fest. Awesome show.
NBA, MLB. Let's do it all before we get to that, though.

Speaker 3 When cool, Creamy Ranch meets tangy, bold buffalo, the whole is greater than the sum of its sauce. Say howdy, partner, to new Buffalo Ranch sauce only at McDonald's for a limited time.

Speaker 1 At participating, McDonald's. Okay, let's go.

Speaker 1 Now in the streets, there is violence.

Speaker 1 And then a lot of

Speaker 1 perfect dun dun dun.

Speaker 1 Low place to honor the washing

Speaker 1 And then I can pay all on the sun Oh no, we're gonna rock down to Eli Trick Avenue

Speaker 1 And then we'll take it higher

Speaker 1 Oh, we're gonna rock down to Eli Trick Avenue It's part of my take presented by Bar Stew Sports

Speaker 1 Welcome to Part of My Take presented by the Cash App. Go download it right now.
Use code Barstool. You get five or ten $10 for free.
$10 to the ASPCA. Today is Friday, October 2nd.

Speaker 1 We have sports coming out of our fucking eyeballs. Sports everywhere.
Here, there, everywhere. Everywhere you look, there are sports.
There's a ball somewhere. There's a ball always in motion.

Speaker 1 There's a ball somewhere rolling. It's incredible.
It is awesome.

Speaker 1 It's almost too much. Like, it's tough to focus.

Speaker 1 You have to really dedicate your day and figure out what you're going to be watching between X time and Y time. I wish I had more eyeballs.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 How about we should get into Buddhism? Unlock that third eye.

Speaker 1 I need like 15. I need 16 eyeballs, eight sets of eyeballs.
All right, so we have a lot.

Speaker 1 We are taping this during the Jets Broncos games. We had a flash of Joe Flacco.
Yeah. It had to feel good, PFT.
It felt great.

Speaker 1 It's the Joe Flacco revenge game going up against the Broncos, his longtime team. They just discarded him like yesterday's news.
Yep. There was actually, remember the way that he went out in Denver?

Speaker 1 He basically said that Vic Fangio was not coaching correctly, and then he mysteriously ended up on the injury report the next week. Put his neck out, and then he got his neck hurt.

Speaker 1 And this game is going to be one of those games that everybody thought it was going to be three to six.

Speaker 1 In a weird way, I was hoping for like a three to six snooze fest because that's always fun to have one of those on a Thursday night. But it's actually not a bad game.

Speaker 1 And it's tough to say, like, are these two teams just equally exactly as terrible at each other? Yeah, they match their terribleness. So we'll update throughout the show.

Speaker 1 Second half is about to start. Sam Darnold, credit to Sam Darnold for that run.
It was awesome. I'm happy I never gave up on that guy.

Speaker 1 But no,

Speaker 1 I did like Sam

Speaker 1 Darnold's toughness where he got body slammed and I think he broke his shoulder, but then went into the locker room and was like, this might be my only chance to get a win this year. I have to play.

Speaker 1 Got to put something on tape while the adrenaline's still going.

Speaker 1 to be up. I don't even know if it was toughness.
It was just maybe just the smartest thing he's ever done where he's like, I can get stats tonight. Put me back in because we can beat this team.

Speaker 1 I was looking at the close-ups of him and especially right after the injury when it kind of zoomed in on his eyes. I don't know how he puts a helmet on.
And his helmet is gigantic. Sam Darrell.

Speaker 1 Big fucking head. Big dome.
Big dome. First team all skull.
Big.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I don't know how he fits that thing over his head.
He's got like the, who's it, Mark Kelso was the old player back in the 80s that used to have the double helmet on the Bills.

Speaker 1 That's what it was.

Speaker 1 Wes Welker had one for a while now. Yeah, he did.
Yeah, it stops concussions altogether. When he was on the Broncos.
Yeah, so Sam Darnold,

Speaker 1 he's a dual threat quarterback.

Speaker 1 It should be Joe Flacco at quarterback and then Sam Darnold at running back. Running back.
Steal my Mitch thing. Yeah.
Yeah, Mitch should be starting running back.

Speaker 1 He should be at running back, and then Frank Gore should still be fullback. Yes.
All right. So, oh, another Yabo for the Padres.
Dang. Slam Diego is officially back.

Speaker 1 Oh, and they're bat flipping. The Cardinals are going to be mad about that.
Cardinals fans get mad.

Speaker 1 Yelled, he's eaten. He did he eat.
Feed him. He did the feed me.
He did the Zeke.

Speaker 1 I'm going to do an open records request at the FCC in a week and find out if any Cardinals fans wrote letters to them complaining about the obscene bat flips that are going on.

Speaker 1 This is getting out of hand. I love the Padre swag.
We just have so much swag. Let's do baseball first.

Speaker 1 Okay, but one thing about Sam Darnold: when he went to the sideline, did you know that he couldn't get in the injury tent? Yeah, yeah, because there were too many people in there. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I feel like Le'Veon Bell has just squatted in the the injury tent, and that's his personal property, and he owns that now at Betlife Stadium.

Speaker 1 Well, the injury tent for the Jets sideline is essentially like the hottest club in New York. No, it's the little shed that your dad builds, and he just goes and sits there so he can be by himself.

Speaker 1 It's the she shed shit. That's where the injury tent is like, hey, guess what? I don't, if I sit in this little blue tent, they can't make me go in and get the shit kicked out of me.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you're invisible. It's great.
You're right. Adam Gase is like, he's one of those old, before they had green screens, they had blue screens, right? Yeah.

Speaker 1 So Adam Gase has, with his robot robot eyes, he can't see the color blue. It's the perfect place to hide out.
He needs some Felix Grace.

Speaker 1 All right, so let's do a little baseball. Then we're going to do some NBA.

Speaker 1 What do we want to start with? Reds didn't score for 22 innings. That was tough.

Speaker 1 Trevor Burrus was awesome. Awesome.
12 strikeouts. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Two hits. And that's got to be so demoralizing.
But 22 innings. Like, if you're a Reds fan, I'm sorry because that, to not get to cheer once in 22 innings, that's brutal.
But you made the postseason.

Speaker 1 You made the postseason. Yeah, kind of.

Speaker 1 I was thinking, another team that got eliminated, I was doing some soul searching because on Wednesday's show, I was very high on the Indians. I think I picked the Indians for the World Series.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I was very high on them. And I was like, why was I all of a sudden saying the Cleveland Indians were going to the World Series?

Speaker 1 And then I realized that I was listening to our good friends and colleagues, Jared Krabis and Dallas Braden starting nine. Great podcast, by the way.

Speaker 1 Jared is the most unbiased national beat reporter there is in baseball, and he totally wasn't pumping up the Indians because he wanted to see them beat the Yankees.

Speaker 1 No, that had nothing to do with that. Not at all.
Because I said to myself,

Speaker 1 Where did that come from, dude? Like, you were way too high on the Indians for no real reason. I was like, oh, Jared just incepted my brain because I played it back in my head.

Speaker 1 And I was like, he just was talking about how the Indians had fucking Sandy Koufax and Pedro Martinez in his prime and Satchel Page. Like their starting rotation was the greatest of all time.

Speaker 1 Oh, they just go San Diego again. Yup.
Oh,

Speaker 1 off the wall.

Speaker 1 San Diego's back. So, I mean, that second game against the Yankees-Indians game was awesome.
Yeah, it was as close to a football game as a baseball game will ever get. Yes, except four hours.

Speaker 1 Six hours. Long regular season.
Tens and nine season nine-in-a-game ever. It took forever.

Speaker 1 I'm not going to say where I was, but I was in a different time zone, and I was watching the end of the game, and I was certain it was a replay of the game from earlier that night.

Speaker 1 I was like, there's no way that this game is still going on. It ended like two minutes before the 10 o'clock Dodgers game.
Yeah. That's how crazy it was.

Speaker 1 What other ones? White Sox, that was tough.

Speaker 1 Does it feel? It was awesome. I love the eight games in one day.

Speaker 1 But does it really feel like the playoffs? No. Yet.
Not to me. I think Monday will.

Speaker 1 Monday doesn't feel like the playoffs either like the fact that they're playing

Speaker 1 i think once it gets to your seven game series

Speaker 1 once it gets to a five game series monday then it's gonna right now like all the three game series they definitely feel like exhibition don't get me wrong it's fun yeah like wednesday was fun having eight games like i don't know if you can do this next year mlb because it is a lot of fun but it also does feel slightly cheapened because it's like what are we watching here um the cubs shout out the cubs for uh rain delaying it so that they didn't have to have you darvers potentially pitch in the rain.

Speaker 1 That was smart.

Speaker 1 It was a nasty day in Chicago. It was

Speaker 1 a downpour. Listen, if you want me to explain it,

Speaker 1 I'll explain it. No problem.

Speaker 1 Ew Darvish is the slowest pitcher on the face of the earth.

Speaker 1 And the Cubs watched the Indians-Yankees game last night, and they're like, if we have Eugene, if Eudarvish starts this game and there's forecasted rain anywhere in the next 12 hours, we could potentially have to have him sit down in the second inning eight hours into the game and then get back up.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 smart 2.0. Smart, what? What? You're talking about the spaceship that exploded and people died.
People died in school. Space teacher passed away.

Speaker 1 Delaying a game. Because of the O-rings.
Because Ew Darvish is slow? Well, they delayed the challenger when it was supposed to be. It was supposed to be

Speaker 1 on the Cubs. I don't know.
I don't know. I'm just saying.
Oh, this is Marlowe. I might have just watched Darville.
How many deaths tomorrow?

Speaker 1 Mark Pryor. His arm's going to fall.
Jeez, he's still on the Cubs. Wow, what a downer.
I'm telling the two men up. These two situations are very large.

Speaker 1 Hank,

Speaker 1 what side of your bed did you get off today? No, I just, I just want, you know. Also, shout out one last baseball note.

Speaker 1 I had Carlos Correa. Well, the Twins.
Yeah. Twins, 18 losses in a row.
I mean, that is from Mark.

Speaker 1 So our good friend Coley here, he keeps track of the miserable index coming out of Minnesota. And this was one that he tweeted out a couple days ago.

Speaker 1 The Twins have more MVPs than playoff wins over the last 16 years.

Speaker 1 Feels impossible. That is 18 in a row is impossible.
Yeah, it is. That's impossible.
Like, you can't have it. It's impressive.
It is.

Speaker 1 Hang your hat on it. Just think about Kirby Puckett.
Although, didn't he get

Speaker 1 at the end? Yeah. Think about Kirby Puckett.

Speaker 1 No, it isn't. Think about his home run.
No, it isn't. Think about Kirby Puckett's dinger.
Putting the team on his back. Think about the plexiglass.
Jumping off the plexiglass. Well, it wasn't even.

Speaker 1 I missed that outfield fence they used to have because it was like you took a giant blue condom and just stretched it out. No, no, but they had the, they had like

Speaker 1 a

Speaker 1 hockey.

Speaker 1 Was that Minnesota or was that? No, it's Minnesota. Minnesota.
Okay, but Minnesota also had like a tarp that they would spread

Speaker 1 centerfield. Yeah, right, right center.
They had a huge tarp. They need to bring out that tarp as an out-of-fence again.
So the Twins, 18 in a row, that's just terrible. Sorry, Minnesota.

Speaker 1 At least the Vikings look good this year. They look great.

Speaker 1 But I had one note about Carlos Corran. Well, nobody on the Vikings got Corona from the Titans yet.
So good job.

Speaker 1 These fucks, these Houston Astro fucks, Carlos Correa saying after they beat the Twins, which, dude,

Speaker 1 you don't get to be like, well, look at us. We beat the Twins.
They lost 18 in a row. 18 playoff games in a row.
If you have a pulse, you beat the Twins in the playoffs.

Speaker 1 We, this room, there's only six of us in here right now. We could beat the Twins in the playoffs.

Speaker 1 I do think that there's something to the Twins or to the Astros finally being able to play real baseball where not like they're not seeing ghosts and they're not seeing like you know they step up to the plate and every expectation isn't i'm gonna get beamed on this next pitch so his quote after was so tone deaf and such a douchebag thing he said i know a lot of people are mad i know a lot of people don't want to see us here but what are they going to say now all right carlos correa

Speaker 1 your team was 29 and 31 this year okay

Speaker 1 you The only reason you're in the playoffs is they have, for the first time ever, they let in half the league.

Speaker 1 That is literally the only reason your team was under 500 you shouldn't even be there and then by luck you played the worst playoff team in the history of the playoffs sorry twins fans again shut the up i hope you get swept in the next round who are they playing jake

Speaker 1 a's astros yankees rays a's okay all right we're big a's guys now well dallas braden i love the a's they just they're something about the a's as soon as they put in on that jersey we were talking about this last night as soon as they put on that jersey you just every one of them is like a Calibra.

Speaker 1 They should let the guy that plays a saxophone in still. Yes.
They should let him in. You know what really needs to happen? This has been pissing me off, and especially if you're a Reds fan,

Speaker 1 they need to bring back small ball. Nobody's playing small ball anymore.
I sound like my grandfather because I grew up watching baseball.

Speaker 1 But he's right.

Speaker 1 You got to get on baseball. You need Ned Yost to get a job somewhere.
Mike Socher. Socialism.
You need to get on first base. You need to steal second base.

Speaker 1 You need to get a seeing eye single here and there. Bring that shit back.
Small ball wins. That's what it's all about.
You got to zig while everybody else zags. No shit.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Home runs are cool.
You know what else is cool? Bunting down the third baseline and having a throwing error gets you to first base.

Speaker 1 I love whenever you could tell like you're you're not really into that sport because you're like, you just want to bring back the thing from 20 years ago.

Speaker 1 I'm into being into baseball, but I'm not into like... Yeah, you know what you need? I'm not into shutouts.
You know what they need? We need the Duke guys slapping the floor. Yeah, I need the less.

Speaker 1 Here's what I want. You need a hurley on Duke.
Here's what I need. I need the less talented teams to be able to win.
When that happens, then everything's fun.

Speaker 1 If it's all just guys getting up there and hitting a million Slam Diego.

Speaker 1 They dig a sacrifice bond. The Slam Diego.
All right, so the other sports. They're digging fielders' choice.
The Heat and the Lakers.

Speaker 1 Jake and I got in a disagreement before

Speaker 1 Jake's Heat, which I guess they're all of our Heat, but I don't really own them anymore. I mean, we're Heat podcasts, but are we? Never me.
Well, I don't know about that. The Heat.

Speaker 1 Listen, it's a sticky turf down there in Orlando.

Speaker 1 It was just bad luck the first night. I never root for injuries.
However, it wouldn't be the worst thing if like Jimmy Butler and Tyler Hero and

Speaker 1 like

Speaker 1 I don't know throw out someone else maybe Andre Guedal all got hurt so that LeBron by game four was playing

Speaker 1 Myers Leonard and we're like this doesn't count.

Speaker 1 Well it's already an asterisk if the Lakers win yeah but if they go yeah if they go up against the Heat and missing their like top five scores right that would be amazing.

Speaker 1 So I think that if you're the heat like maybe just start DNPing your best players so that us LeBron haters can have something to cling to. Yeah.
Like we're just being honest here.

Speaker 1 You know what I mean? We're just laying our cards out here. We're not pretending to, you know, be like, oh, yeah, it's they would have had a shot.
They wouldn't have had a shot.

Speaker 1 If Jimmy Butler were to accidentally get locked in his coffee shop and be unable to make it down to the game.

Speaker 1 Dragic and

Speaker 1 who else got hurt? Bam got hurt? Bam. Jimmy's Lakers.
If they were healthy, the Lakers still would have fucking killed them. We don't know.
We don't know that.

Speaker 1 Watching that first quarter when the Heat made every shot and they were up like 13 and then the Lakers like, oh, okay, we'll just go on a 45-5 run.

Speaker 1 I just now, at this point, Heat, please, please, for us that are unabashedly biased about this, just start DNPing, guys. Start getting injured left and right.
Give us something to cling to.

Speaker 1 Because all I got right now is it's, one, it's Anthony Davis' team. I think we can all agree on on that.
Two, I was going to say JaVail.

Speaker 1 Two,

Speaker 1 we really need some more injuries so that we can be like the Lakers barely.

Speaker 1 You know what we need? We need Eudonis Haslam to be a starter. And so that way the story is like LeBron James beat a 45-year-old guy.
Right.

Speaker 1 That's just a bad visual. Jay Crowder running point.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 All right. This is very anti-heat culture of you guys.
We've got to stay positive. No, dude, they support each other.
Sweet. I mean, the ratings are so bad anyway.

Speaker 1 It's like if no one's going to be able to do that. True, good point, Hank.
Good point, Hank. We literally said on Tuesday, we're in Todd Coppola.
It's so easy.

Speaker 1 It's so easy for LeBron.

Speaker 1 It's just me now. You know what?

Speaker 1 You can take a look at the finals that LeBron's been in, and nobody watches it because LeBron doesn't, he can't perform on a big stage when he loses.

Speaker 1 This is basically Bryson winning the U.S. Open.
If he had fans there to heckle him, he probably wouldn't win it.

Speaker 1 If he had Laker Dan court sides with nachos on him with Jack Nicholson, wouldn't it? I think that's a totally different story right now. I got, I love when we just go into full-on spin zone.

Speaker 1 Like, hey, this is what we're going to throw me off about LeBron James. Here's how we're going to get away out of it.
His dunks.

Speaker 1 He does the best dunks that suck of all time because he swishes all his dunks. Need a little contact with the rim.

Speaker 1 Make it look a little bit more violent. He just gets his face above the rim and then he jams it directly through the hole.
He's not that impressive. He also did that fucking total hot dog move.

Speaker 1 I know you saw it, Hank. The dunk at the end of the first half when time had expired by like 10 seconds.

Speaker 1 And he basically was like, hey, here's what I would do in the dunk contest if I weren't a coward.

Speaker 1 I do love how LeBron James does score a Gami every single big game, but it's to see like, okay, this is the only time anybody's had 31 points, 16 rebounds, 14 assists in a playoff game.

Speaker 1 It's the Nick Wright stat that we talk about that he always tweets out. But I think he intentionally tries to get...

Speaker 1 a different version of that stat line every single time so it can get brought up again.

Speaker 1 If he's at like nine assists and 16 rebounds, he's like, well, I could get a triple double, but no one's ever ever had 17 rebounds and nine assists. Yeah.
25 points in a game.

Speaker 1 So good job, Lakers fans. Obviously, this is tongue-in-cheek.
Your team's the best team, blah, blah, blah, blah. But one last thing I'm going to say.

Speaker 1 I just remember what you guys did when LeBron showed up and you spray painted all over his mural and stuff. Yeah, but here's one last thing.
Are you guys ready for this?

Speaker 1 This is the ultimate spin zone. So game two, Friday.
Game three, Sunday. Game four, Tuesday.
We have to find a way for the Heat to avoid a sweep because game five would be Friday.

Speaker 1 The Heat win a championship on Friday night. We have college football and NFL Sunday.
We won't even fucking mention it on Monday. But the Lakers win a championship.

Speaker 1 Thursday night. Yeah, Friday night.
Friday night? Friday night. I think that's old news by the time we're going to do it.
Dude, it's not even worth, like, we might put it

Speaker 1 in the ticker for the podcast. Everyone who watches it, shout out to Anthony Scaramucci.
We'll put it in the ticker. That's it.
We're not going to fucking talk about it. Nope.
Nope.

Speaker 1 Well, yeah, we'll do an update with Jake afterwards. It's football season, though.
So

Speaker 1 Okay,

Speaker 1 that was too much for Black. Jake, don't come up with headlines for the list.
The Lakers in five is what we're rooting for. Friday night.

Speaker 1 Did I not predict at the start of these playoffs that the Lakers were going to gentlemen sweep every single series they were in? No, you actually said Blazers in five. But then after that, I said

Speaker 1 when I was proven wrong about the Blazers sweep. No, Charles Barclay said the Blazers changed the Blazers on a sweep.
But you can't.

Speaker 1 Then after they did the gentleman sweep, my new prediction.

Speaker 1 Okay, so I've got credit for my new prediction that the Lakers are going to win. I evolved.
There was a material change in that the Blazers did not, in fact, win in five.

Speaker 1 Therefore, I evolved my take saying it was going to be a series of gentlemen sweeps.

Speaker 1 All right. Let's do

Speaker 1 Lakers in five Friday night. You know what? Let's do it.
If LeBron really wants to prove what a good teammate he is, he should just sit out game two.

Speaker 1 He should just sit out. Give the spotlight to Dwight Howard, Caruso, Kuzma, and Javel.
She's awesome. Have JaVail just all dunks.
See how

Speaker 1 he can get on dunks in a game.

Speaker 1 All right, so that was our Laker hate 10 minutes. Oh, wow.
Dallas Braden is in the A's clubhouse drinking beers with them, breaking the rules. Corona.
I'd love to see it. Corona.
Suspend him. Corona.

Speaker 1 Don't go on another man's mound.

Speaker 1 My

Speaker 1 Corona.

Speaker 1 All right. I'm going to write that down for Boomer Boomer.

Speaker 1 My Corona. Do the ad real quick, PFT, and then we'll do some NFL preview.
Well, I don't want to introduce the ad by saying do the ad real quick, PFT. Do the ad.
Do it.

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Yo, Brett Rippin's pretty nice spiral. Like,

Speaker 1 de-spiral. Again, he's playing the Jets.
But that doesn't... I mean, spiral is a spiral.
I think you can spiral better against certain teams.

Speaker 1 Still not that confident. That spiral looks good.
He might have.

Speaker 1 Why is he covering? Somebody needs to check his ears for illegal communication equipment. He's now covering his ears with no fans of the crowd.
There's no fans of the.

Speaker 1 I did notice that when he first got into the game, he did that immediately when he first stepped on the field. And if you're

Speaker 1 the offensive quarter for the Broncos, you would assume that he would know what the first play was

Speaker 1 before he went out there. But this is Pat Shermer that we're dealing with.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 That was an odd thing. Okay.
All right, weekend preview. Let's do it.

Speaker 1 It's not that weird.

Speaker 1 There's no fans. There's no sound.
I know, but it's still just like it clears the

Speaker 1 he could definitely hear. It's all the cats that are in heat just screaming in that stadium right now.
He's trying to get that out of his head. Brett Rippin, looking good.

Speaker 1 Boise State legend.

Speaker 1 No Jared Zabransky. Real skinny forearms on Brett Rippin.
Yeah, he does. He needs to do something about that.
All right, let's do it. The girth of Teddy Bridgewater's penis.
Let's do some picks.

Speaker 1 Let's do some previews, then we'll do some picks. Jaguars, Bengals, stinker.

Speaker 1 Anything. Anything.
Anyone got anything? Shootout. It's going to be a shootout.
I mean, Minshew and Burrow. Over.
This is my over. Shootout.
Calling it right now.

Speaker 1 I feel like these are two types of quarterbacks that after the game, they're probably just going to go over to Joe Burrow's house, sit in the backyard with a lawn chair, like light off some sparklers.

Speaker 1 Yeah, have a good time. Have a couple cold ones.
Yep. Yep.
I like that. I like that.

Speaker 1 Colts, Bears,

Speaker 1 Nick Foles, baby. We're doing Nick Foles.
We are fucking doing it. I don't know why the Bears are underdogs,

Speaker 1 but we're doing this. We're absolutely doing this.
This is in Chicago. Yes.

Speaker 1 You know what?

Speaker 1 I think the Bears are going to win this game. I do, too.
I absolutely do.

Speaker 1 All right. Browns, Cowboys.

Speaker 1 The Cowboys should win this one. This is.

Speaker 1 You know what?

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. Hank's talking about dogs this weekend.
He loves

Speaker 1 the dogs on this weekend. I know that Jerry Jones is definitely going to re-fall in love with Odell Beckham during this game.

Speaker 1 Pick the worst person for him to fall back in love with that would be the most destructive to his team, but is still super talented. Jerry Jones is going to gravitate towards that person.

Speaker 1 So he'll probably talk about Odell Beckham and Kareem Hunt. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I don't think the Cowboys are as bad as they've looked at times. Their defense is bad.

Speaker 1 You like the Dogs? All right, whatever. Saints lines.
I have a fun story. I think it's going to be like a blowout.
I think that that's going to be not a blowout, but a lot of points.

Speaker 1 I think it's going to be like 35-30.

Speaker 1 The Saints Lions, I have a fun stat for you. Okay.

Speaker 1 The Saints have covered 17 straight October football games. The Saints, that means that we have never done a pardon my take episode where the Saints have not covered an October football game.

Speaker 1 The last time they didn't cover an October football game is week six, 2015. Okay.
That's fucking wild. So I have to bet on the Saints.
I don't like the Saints at all. I love the Lions.
But I have to.

Speaker 1 But you have to. That's an insane, insane stat.
2015 was the last time the Saints didn't cover an October football game. Why do you think that is? Squat over?

Speaker 1 Sean Payton gets back into CrossFit and starts feeling himself again? They're 16-1 and straight up in those games, by the way.

Speaker 1 I would say the Saints because they usually start very slow, and then this is right when they kind of get it going. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Drew Brees like works out all the kinks in his arm finally in three, four weeks.

Speaker 1 I think that Detroit is the New Orleans of Michigan. Does that make sense?

Speaker 1 They have great airports. Yeah.
Both cities have awesome airports.

Speaker 1 They have casinos.

Speaker 1 There's a lot of outdoor drinking, even though it's not legal in Detroit. They still embrace that culture.

Speaker 1 So, but wouldn't that be every city, every city's funnest, every state's funnest city is just the New Orleans of that?

Speaker 1 Yeah, you could say that if you wanted to, but it also goes a little bit into football where it's like the Lions have the same type of heartbreaking losses that the Saints have.

Speaker 1 The Saints just only have like one of those losses a year. The Lions have them 12 times a year.
Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I mean, the Saints have the Super Bowl. So you're saying what you're really saying is the Lions need like a horrific natural disaster and then a quarterback to come and save the city.

Speaker 1 I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that.
Oh, you're dude's fucked up. No, I'm not.
That's really

Speaker 1 fucked up. That is messed up.
Hank is.

Speaker 1 I can't believe that Big Cat went there on that. I mean,

Speaker 1 I don't know how they're related at all whatsoever other than that happening. Their losses.
Their losses, I think, are similar. Like in heartbreaking fashion.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I'm saying that every single Saints heartbreaking playoff loss in recent history could very well have been a Lions week three loss. Week three loss.
Okay, I got that. All right, that makes sense.

Speaker 1 Yeah, because the Lions haven't been in the playoffs in 30 years. They did play.
No, they played that awesome game against the Saints. They haven't won a playoff game since 1991.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Tony Schuffler was in that game. Yeah, two great quarterbacks going at it.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 1 One of the greatest of all time, and then also Drew Brees. Yep.
Drew Brees. Drew Breezy.
Let's see how he does. Seahawks, Dolphins.
So I was thinking about this. Oh, Hank loves this dog.

Speaker 1 I like this dog too, Hank.

Speaker 1 I kind of like it too. This is my bird alert of the week.
I was thinking about how did the bird alert do the last two weeks? I didn't do one last week. I was too demoralized after

Speaker 1 the Cardinals beat the shit out of the Washington football team.

Speaker 1 I was closing my eyes and thinking, like, this is a weird Jersey game. Like, the Seahawks going on the road with the Dolphins' candy ass uniforms.

Speaker 1 And I was trying to remember the last time they played, and I looked it up, and it was the game that got delayed in the third quarter because the sprinklers just like turned on in the middle of the game.

Speaker 1 So I knew something funny happened. So I think something funny is going to happen here, and I like that.
I think we all agree.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I mean, the Seahawks' willingness to play in weird games perfectly matches up with Fitzmagic starting to percolate.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 I think that the Dolphins could do this. They could win a like 19 to 14 game.
I like that. With those weird fucking scores.
Yes, Burma. And

Speaker 1 I think, I'm not going to look this up, but just the eyeball test, the flight from Seattle to Miami, that has to be the longest flight in the NFL. Wait, we had that as a.

Speaker 1 No, we had that as a trivia question on the dozens. It was...
No, it's... It's like Miami to

Speaker 1 San Francisco, remember?

Speaker 1 Miami. Yes, you're right.
Miami, San Francisco is usually longer. Because it goes juts out.
Yes.

Speaker 1 I remember being like, how? Or no, it would be L.A. No, no, it's L.A., I think.
Okay, it's Frisco. Yeah.
San Fran is what the locals call it. I've heard that they call it Frisco.
They get so many.

Speaker 1 But yeah, that's got to be what, like a nine-hour flight? Yeah. That flight sucks.
That messes up the entire week. 12 hours.
There's not even San Fran locals. San Fran.
This is what they call it.

Speaker 1 It's just Transplant City. Well, it's all the tech bros now.
They've taken it over. Cisco.
Right. Frisco.
Right.

Speaker 1 The richest family in San Fran 50 years ago is now homeless because Mark Zuckerberg took their house.

Speaker 1 Dems the brakes, I think. It was funny when I private buses to work.
When I was out there for the Super Bowl, this was, what? That was Panthers Broncos, right? Yeah.

Speaker 1 And I was getting a Lyft. I was getting like a ride to the stadium or something like that.
And the person that was driving me was a vice president at Facebook. And they were also driving Lyft.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Because they're like,

Speaker 1 I need to make enough money to eat now that my salary covers my rent in the the city.

Speaker 1 All right. Ravens or no.
Chargers, Bucs. This is a slaughterhouse.
Hank loves the Chargers in this game. So the Bucs offense, I looked up the stats on them.

Speaker 1 They're very average. But their defense is actually above them.
Their defense is really good.

Speaker 1 But Bruce Arias needs to figure out how to make this offense start to click a little bit because right now I think they might even be a little bit below average in terms of the NFL.

Speaker 1 But I think what we can all agree of is the Bucs. I was going to try to say that the Bucs are the East Coast Chargers, but that's not

Speaker 1 really true. So I won't say it.
But I like them as a dog. I like the Chargers as a dog because, again, I'm a Herbert believer.

Speaker 1 Okay, I think the Bucs, I think their defense is too good, especially first road game, even though it's not the road, but it is the road for Herbert. Is the stadium going to be open? I don't know.

Speaker 1 Because Florida's doing that thing where they're saying, like, okay, the local governors can determine whether or not to. And they have the parade for Tampa Bay.
Yeah. The Lightning.

Speaker 1 They should at least just open up the entire pirate ship. Yeah.
I agree. Scrack that pirate ship.
I agree. Ravens, Washington football team, that's going to be a slaughter.
Yep. Pump them.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 You got to pump them. I think they're going to win by 30.
Yeah, so the spread is 14 right now. I'm going to take the Ravens.
This is not my bird alert. Can I ask a question, PFT? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Is there a chance maybe Alex Smith?

Speaker 1 I hope not. Not on that field.
Not on that field. Him and RG3 need to be just like wrapped up in bubble wrap every time they come within five nautical miles of FedEx Field.

Speaker 1 I feel like Ron Rivera, the way he's been giving up on games, I think he's pretty close to giving up on Dwayne Haskins. He is.
I think that he goes to Kyler Murray, though. I mean, Kyle Allen.

Speaker 1 Okay, okay.

Speaker 1 It would be nice. It would be a nice redemption story to see Alex Smith.

Speaker 1 Cardinals, Panthers, speaking of Kyler Murray, Hank loves the Panthers. You love every dog.
And it's going to suck because my can't lose parlays 2-0 in the last two weeks.

Speaker 1 It's going to win again, you idiot. This is going to be the can't-win parlay.
Okay, so then do it. Put your money where your mouth is.
All right, 0-3.

Speaker 1 No, it's four. It's four games.
I will. Okay.

Speaker 1 Vikings, Texans. Is that game happening? Wait, with the Panthers, I had this thought the other day.
Is Teddy Bridgewater like the most boringly average quarterback in the NFL? Tyrod Taylor.

Speaker 1 I think they're pretty similar. No, he's a junkyard Teddy Bridgewater.
Teddy Bridgewater is way better than Tyrod Taylor, but they're similar in that

Speaker 1 they will not make mistakes, so it's hard to be like, they stink. Yeah.
But they'll also not make any risky throws to be like, we could win the game. And the thing is, I really like Teddy Bridgewater.

Speaker 1 And off-the-field, he's got a big personality. And his off-the-field personality does not translate at all to what he does on the field.

Speaker 1 He'll go out there and throw like 12 for 19 for 160 yards, one touchdown, no interceptions. Yeah, I mean, you can win with Teddy Bridgewater.
The Saints should have kept him.

Speaker 1 Vikings, Texans, is this game happening? It is, right? Yeah, this game is happening. The Texans stink.
Texans, well, they got schedule fucked. Remember that.

Speaker 1 This is their one piece of medicine.

Speaker 1 It could be a big game for Kirk because you remember we we did the math, you know, that stat about how James Harden performs differently in different cities with strip clubs.

Speaker 1 When Kirk Cousins is in cities with megachurches, he excels. Yep.
So this is like, he's going to be breaking bread with Joel Austin before the game. Saying up till 4 a.m.
doing shots of apple cider.

Speaker 1 I think the Texans really stink.

Speaker 1 I mean, I said it last week when I was like, that was a time to take the Texans against the Steelers where you're like this, you know, an 0-2 team that has at least the bones of being a playoff team.

Speaker 1 I think they really, really stink. Giants, Rams, Slaughter.
Hank likes the Giants. Hank, you like the Giants? You're fucking crazy, man.
That's gross. You're crazy for that.
That's gross.

Speaker 1 You're straight up crazy for that. You're crazy for that.
It's the week.

Speaker 1 Every year has a week. I don't know, man.
I'm going to be so mad if this happens.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I don't want to see you on Sunday now.

Speaker 1 I'm going to have to bet the dogs with you.

Speaker 1 Patriots, Chiefs. Fun fact, the Patriots, for the third time in 18 years, are underdogs of seven points or more.
Three times in 18 years.

Speaker 1 What happened to the other two? I don't know. I would imagine it was Matt Castle, right? Had to have been.
Yeah, if the stack goes back that far, he'd probably be one of those guys.

Speaker 1 I have a prediction for this game. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I think that Belichick is going to run a play very similar to either the shovel pass or the tackle eligible touchdown because Belichick loves doing little winks at coaches.

Speaker 1 You know, like he watches all the film and he sees something. He's like, I'm going to give like a little sly.
Kicking him under the tape. But it's not necessarily like a mean thing to Andy Reid.

Speaker 1 Like, I got you. It's almost like a tip of the cap to him during the game.
Right. Because Belchick loves football that much.
Yeah. That he'll like borrow a play and play it back.
Like

Speaker 1 he's covering a song that his favorite band did or something like that. But it would actually be, he would do it in this circumstance more as

Speaker 1 more as a big fuck you to John Harbaugh because John Harbaugh got beat by it. And so he'd want to make John Harbaugh have to watch that highlight again.
Right. Bat flip and stare down.
Let's go.

Speaker 1 Fernando Tati shifted a. He took forever to get out of the box there.
I love

Speaker 1 this.

Speaker 1 Dude, he's hit two home runs since we started taping this podcast. Those uniforms are sick, too.
That was

Speaker 1 offensive. I think they have fewer pinstripes, but the pinstripes are thicker in San Diego.
And the logo is the Buffalo Wild Wings logo. Yeah.

Speaker 1 2-0 against the spread. 1-1 in games.
What? Oh, they were. They were eight-point underdogs.
Do you have the games?

Speaker 1 It was the first when Brady was suspended, week one, 2016. Garoppolo? What was his score? Garoppolo,

Speaker 1 really just Roger Goodell being a dickhead. Okay.
Remember when Roger Goodell was supposed to watch Monday Night Football in his man cave, and then he never did.

Speaker 1 And just killed probably children? Yeah, 100 children. Challenger two points, yeah.
How many challengers of children did he kill? 100.

Speaker 1 They were eight and a half dogs. They won 23-21, and then week 17, 2009, Patriots are locked in the playoffs, so they started all bench players.

Speaker 1 They lost by seven, but covered, and West Wilker towards ACL.

Speaker 1 So right now, the position that we're in looking ahead to this game is exactly where we were on Monday night when, in hindsight, it should have been so simple.

Speaker 1 Like, oh, you're giving Patrick Mahomes, like, you're spotting Patrick Mahomes points in a football game. Right now, we're like, oh, you're spotting Bill Belichick eight points in a football game.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but you can never do that. You can never do what just happened and made you feel stupid.
You can't then do it the next week and be like, ooh, remember when I felt stupid?

Speaker 1 I'm going to fix it this time because then you feel stupid the other way.

Speaker 1 But I did. Yeah, what just happened is going to happen again.

Speaker 1 It's like, if you bet against Patrick Mahomes,

Speaker 1 you bet against Patrick Mahomes again. You might be fucked.
You're just basically betting every week against Patrick Mahomes.

Speaker 1 So this is actually a perfect game to bet on because afterwards you can rationalize it one way or the other.

Speaker 1 If the Chiefs cover, it's like, yeah, Patrick Mahomes, he's the tits.

Speaker 1 If the Patriots win, it's like, yeah, he spotted Bill Belichick eight points.

Speaker 1 Of course, he's going to cover that. Right, right.
Yeah, that is. It's the ultimate out in that respect.
I agree with that.

Speaker 1 Bills Raiders, Josh Allen,

Speaker 1 September AFC Offensive Player of the Month. So,

Speaker 1 shout out Josh Allen.

Speaker 1 He's going to fuck that stadium. Yeah,

Speaker 1 I think the Bills are going to win, but I'm very nervous about this game. Very nervous about this game.

Speaker 1 This is a game I would love to see if the stadium was open, because I'm pretty sure Bills Mafia would just roll deep into Vegas. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 That's what's going to be great about when the stadium gets people in it.

Speaker 1 It's going to be, I'm sure there'll be, you know, the local diehards that adopt the team just like they did with the Golden Knights. But then it's every team circles that game on their calendar.

Speaker 1 Of course. And it's like, yeah, we're going to make a little weekend trip to Vegas.
Of course. It's going to be a lot of fun.

Speaker 1 All right, last up: Eagles 49ers. I have a stat.

Speaker 1 Two quarterbacks in NFL history have thrown for 2,600 yards and 14 touchdowns in their first nine career starts. Who are they?

Speaker 1 Say it again. Two NFL quarterbacks have thrown for 2,600 yards and 14 touchdowns in their first nine career starts.

Speaker 1 Who are they?

Speaker 1 Brett Favre.

Speaker 4 Nick Mullins.

Speaker 1 Patrick Mahomes and Nick Mullins. Okay.
Rarefied Air. Nick Mullins, future Hall of Famer and Super Bowl champ.

Speaker 1 I like the Niners. I like Nick Mullins.
I like the smell of him. And George Kittle's back.
Yeah. So that's going to be nice.
Yeah, the Eagles are just, they're so sad.

Speaker 1 The Eagles fans are actually going, they want Jalen Hurts now. I do think that Philadelphia is going to figure it out at some point.
They're going to turn it around. They have to.

Speaker 1 There's too much talent on the team. The coaching staff is too good.
No. I think they have to.
I'm done. I'm done.
You're pulling the cord on them. Yeah.
I'm not ready.

Speaker 1 I can't quit them. They don't have their entire roster.
They have one wide receiver in practice. Yeah.
One. Okay.

Speaker 1 I'm pulling the cord on them. I'm pulling the cord on him.
I can't.

Speaker 1 I'm thinking that they are the same team that won the Super Bowl, and I'm just done. I'm done.
They have to figure it out at some point.

Speaker 1 They will. They have to.

Speaker 1 I don't know if they will. Philadelphia, you have to figure this out.
It's going to happen.

Speaker 1 All right, quickly, let's do picks, and then we'll get to Fantasy Fuck Boys. Why doesn't everyone roll through their four picks? Nick Mullens has started nine games.
Yeah. Remember last?

Speaker 1 Yeah, last year when, no, two years ago when Garoppolo tours ACL. Shit.
Yeah. Yeah.
Good job, Nick. Just go through your four picks.
Favorite Ravens,

Speaker 1 underdog, pretty much much every other game, but I guess I'll take the Patriots.

Speaker 1 Over in Jackson, Cincinnati. Jacksonville, Cincinnati.
Ooh, I like it. Under St.
Lyons. Ooh.
Okay. Favorite Baltimore.

Speaker 1 Underdog Panthers at home. They're getting three and a half.
We're all in the Ravens. Under Giants, Rams, 48.

Speaker 1 Over Indy Chicago. Okay.

Speaker 1 I like the Giants Rams under 48. And I like the Ravens minus 13.
Bears plus 2.5.

Speaker 1 And I have an over. I'll take the over.
Oh, fuck it. I'll do the

Speaker 1 Seahawks and the Dolphins. No one's going to play defense in that game.
Sprinkler game, 53.5.

Speaker 1 Oh, and my can't lose parlay.

Speaker 1 Niners.

Speaker 1 Rams.

Speaker 1 Bucks.

Speaker 1 Cardinals.

Speaker 1 225 boosted to 270 on the Barstool Sportsbook app. It's 2-0 in the last two weeks, Hank.

Speaker 1 What are you going to do? Are you going to fade it? Yeah, I'm going to fade it. The full thing.
I think Hank's got got to be. Not only is he going to fade it,

Speaker 1 he's going to fade it money line. Yeah, no, you have to.
Yeah. You have to fade it money line.
I am going to.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I'm going to tell you what it will pay. Okay.
A parlay fade of the can't-lose. You realize it's can't-lose, right? This is my woof-woof parlay.
Your woof-woof parlay. It's a straight fade.

Speaker 1 13 out of 10 parlay. It's my Norman parlay.
I mean, Hank, if you hit this, it'll be quite impressive.

Speaker 1 You have to bet it. We don't deserve this parlay.
100 to win what? If you don't bet it, you're an idiot. Parlays, bro.
100 to win.

Speaker 1 Now Billy's getting real excited. $100 to win $19,000.
Fuck you.

Speaker 1 Billy just looked at me like, what? Did you see...

Speaker 1 It's not going to, dude, the can't lose parlay is going to win. But you also have to be responsible, Billy.
Always responsible gambling. You can lose technically.
Of course you can.

Speaker 1 Responsible gambling. Gambling should be for entertainment.
1-800 gambler. If you have a problem, that actually is for real.
This all should be fun entertainment. Don't bet more than you can afford.

Speaker 1 The can't-lose parlay cannot lose, though. Did you see it can, but it cannot.
Did you see it can't with the Drake parlay hits at? Yeah. So if you put $100 on the Lakers to win the NBA championship,

Speaker 1 what's that, Hank?

Speaker 1 Well, you can't anymore. Yeah.

Speaker 1 But you can still bet it. But it's not the same.
It's not the same.

Speaker 1 But two days ago, you put $100 on the Lakers to win the NBA championship, and Alabama football to win college football, Duke basketball to win college basketball, the Dallas Cowboys to win the Super Bowl, and Tiger Woods to win the Masters.

Speaker 1 And is there one that I'm leaving out here?

Speaker 1 And the Yankees to win the World Series.

Speaker 1 $100 pays out $26 million. Wow.
That's not a bad return on that investment. Now it's probably down to only $22 million.

Speaker 1 Which is trade money. It's really $13 or $14 after taxes.
That gets you a studio in San Fran. Not even really worth it.

Speaker 1 All right. Before we do, what do you got, Billy? I got a friends of the program.
Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Go ahead. Yeah, yeah, same.
So

Speaker 1 was going to be Broncos, but since that's done after this airs, Bengals, Browns, Rams, Bills. Nice.
Overjust hit. Friends of the parlay.
Yeah. All of our friends.
Well, not Hank's friends.

Speaker 1 Hank hates all of them. Hank hates all those people.

Speaker 1 Hank's enemies.

Speaker 1 Hank hates them. The English language and then every quarterback you just named are Hank's biggest rivals in the world.
Yeah, he hates Jared Koff.

Speaker 1 Literally love him. He hates Josh Allen.
Best friend. It's brutal.
Josh Allen's a division rival. All right.
We're going to do fancy fuckboys in a second before we do that. What's up, guys?

Speaker 1 It's Big Cat here making my Irish entrance with proper number 12 Irish whiskey. How do you make an Irish entrance, you ask?

Speaker 1 It starts with a shot of proper number 12 Irish whiskey because real friends don't let friends Irish exit a party without a story to tell.

Speaker 1 Original proper number 12 is rich in a smooth blend of golden grain and single malt, aged four years in bourbon barrels. Mix it up with some ginger ale for a classic and refreshing proper ginger.

Speaker 1 In the mood for something smooth but a little sweeter, try proper Irish Apple, a delicious blend of proper's award-winning Irish whiskey with crisp, fresh notes of apple.

Speaker 1 So get out there and make your Irish entrance. Anything else just wouldn't be proper.
Fantasy fuck, boys. Let's do it.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 What's up, boys? It's It's Frankie Fabricola. My stardom is Savage Mo 2.

Speaker 1 Yeah. 21 Savage.
Metro Boom and wants a Moe. 22 Savage babies.
Out along the way. Shit's going to be a banger.

Speaker 1 Fuck yeah. Yes.
Do you know who that is? No. Toby Kakis Jackson me.
Frankie, pretend like I don't know what you're talking about. My sit him as Ben Roffelsberger.
Yeah, sit down.

Speaker 1 He's not playing this week, bro. If he's on your fantasy squad, sit him down because he's not playing.
Yeah. Fucking Corona.
That's a good reminder. Thank you.
It's not fair.

Speaker 1 It's not fair. My sleeper's apple cider.
Wear masks, though. John Rossi said.
Sleepless apple cider donuts.

Speaker 1 Big cat, big fat. Love to get donuts put in on this Saturday.

Speaker 1 Tis the season for apple cider. Warm them up under your butt.

Speaker 1 Like you're a bird with a little egg.

Speaker 1 What's up, fuckheads? This is Antua Tagli of Ora. I'm starting this week.
ACDC. That's right.
The Bad Boys A Rock A Back.

Speaker 1 If you like songs about fire, fucking rocking, rolling, partying, and hell, you're in luck. They're back.

Speaker 1 It's the same album they made for the last 30 years, repeated over and over again, but it still kicks ass every time you hear it. ACDC, or as I call it, the perfect report card or rock and roll band.

Speaker 1 RIP, Angus Young. I'm also and it's still alive, baby.
Malcolm's

Speaker 1 Malcolm.

Speaker 1 I'm the lightning bark. I'm sad about the other guy.

Speaker 1 Malcolm Croke, big time.

Speaker 1 I'm sitting. Elvis.
I'm also sitting, Big Ben. Good call.
Good call for Brecio. I'm scared to sit.
I'm also sitting him. That's right.

Speaker 1 I'm very excited to see Ben on Sunday when he shows up to the game in a portable iron lung because of his near scare with the coronavirus. Thoughts and praise to Ben Rothesberger.

Speaker 1 He almost caught Corona this week. My sleeper is Oktoberfest beer.
Oktoberfest. That's right.
It's October beer. Two beer October.

Speaker 1 We're drinking deuces, boys. OctoberFest is the best seasonal variety of beer.
There's no if, ands, or busts about it. Kind of sucked down a couple cool drummers just like our grandfather's.
Love it.

Speaker 1 Love it. All right, what's up, guys? It's Fettuccine Alfredo.

Speaker 1 What's up, Fedi Watch?

Speaker 1 I'm starting TikTok.

Speaker 1 I'm starting TikTok

Speaker 1 because

Speaker 1 the mafia is on TikTok now.

Speaker 1 And I knew Billy was going to take it on his fantasy fuck boy, so I wanted to make sure I got it. Fuck you!

Speaker 1 That was pretty easy goddamn that would be a fucking sweet episode Sopranos my sitem is the Giants Hank or sorry Frankie loves the giants.

Speaker 1 That's the dumbest fucking pick ever the giants suck They're gonna get killed you're a moron Bet the Rams bet Jared Goff stop being a fucking idiot

Speaker 1 Christopher's Jamie Hoffa My sleeper is Jimmy Hoffa. Jimmy Hoffa sleeping.
40.

Speaker 1 That's right. Put on the concrete.
That's right.

Speaker 1 I want a teammate, not a Teamster, baby. All right, go ahead.
Finish. My name is Tony Tamaguchi.
What the fuck's up? My stardom is Diets. Start your fucking diet, you fat fucks.

Speaker 1 And my sitim is Gingivitis. You scurvy ass needs mouthwash.
And my sleeper is Mike Gasicki.

Speaker 1 The guy

Speaker 1 on the Dolphins? On the Dolphins. Nice.
That's actually a good pick. Good sleep.
Did he get hurt last week? No, he played really well. Yeah.
How many points?

Speaker 1 No one gives a fuck about the DC team.

Speaker 1 I have them. Sorry.
No, no, I have them. I actually have them.

Speaker 1 No, no. Music's still playing.
No, we stopped. The music.

Speaker 1 Now it's up.

Speaker 1 I didn't know his music was playing. Should we do our interviews? We have an awesome interview.
Big time. Tim Jordan and Mark Ingram.
Levels.

Speaker 1 Big time levels. I love these guys.
Mark Ingram, awesome. Piety, I had a real quick question for you beforehand.
I do have an ad reason.

Speaker 1 Do you have any shorts or pants that you love more than anything else? You know that I do. And you know that I'm wearing my shorts.
It's still a short season for me, even though it's October.

Speaker 1 I'm wearing my bird dogs right now. It's always appropriate to wear shorts.
I'm wearing my bird dogs right now. They are my favorite shorts.
I basically only wear bird dogs between March and October.

Speaker 1 It's kind of just a seasonal thing for me.

Speaker 1 But bird dogs also recently stepped into the pants game. I was wearing their pants.
The other day when we were doing the stool streams, I was doing the sidelines.

Speaker 1 I was wearing these dress pants, and they feel like they're sweatpants. They feel super comfortable.
We can move around in them.

Speaker 1 They actually stole Lululemon's designer, and now they're just doing it better. They cucked Lululemon.
They said, guess what? All your pants belong to us now. Bird Dogs got them.

Speaker 1 They're super comfortable. I love wearing them.
I love their shorts. They're my work pants.
I could play golf in them if I chose to play golf. I could do anything in these pants.

Speaker 1 They are multi-purpose pants, and they do everything.

Speaker 1 They have the Swiss Army Knife, the Taysom Hill of pants. That's what Bird Dogs is.
They're my happy hour pants, too. They look exactly like khakis or chinos.
They feel like silky, soft pajamas.

Speaker 1 Bird dogs are pants, but they have the underwear built in. It solves a lot of problems when you don't have to worry about what pair of underwear you're putting on.
Bird dogs pants.

Speaker 1 Go check them out at birddogs.com. Enter promo code TAKE at checkout.
They're going to throw in a free pair of nunchucks. That's right.
They're bringing back the nunchucks. You heard that right.

Speaker 1 It's nunchuck time. Birddogs.com, promo code take, and boom, you get a free pair of nunchucks with your pair of bird dogs.
You're not going to want to take these things off, I promise you.

Speaker 1 Check them out. Bird dogs.
They do pants now.

Speaker 1 And now,

Speaker 1 trust levels increasing.

Speaker 1 Okay, we now welcome on a very special guest. It is Cam Jordan from New Orleans Saints.
It's Mark Ingram from the Baltimore Ravens, former teammates, now co-podcasters.

Speaker 1 They have a new podcast called Trust Levels.

Speaker 1 You can find it everywhere. You can find podcasts.
Guys, thank you for joining us. I think we should start with, like, PFT and I are pretty cool.
We know what trust means.

Speaker 1 But for like our fans that maybe aren't cool, like, what is trust?

Speaker 4 Trust is like...

Speaker 4 Yeah, trust is just big. Big.
It's always big. Everything we do, we do it big.
So it was big trust. Yeah, trust is just like for sure.
Like, I feel you, like, for sure. Like, yeah, I got you.

Speaker 4 Like, yeah, like, trust. Like, yeah, yeah, no trust.
I got a fire podcast. You know, y'all got a fire podcast.
We're trying to make our podcast fire like y'all's, you know, trust, big trust. Right.

Speaker 4 You know what I mean?

Speaker 1 So is our podcast trust?

Speaker 4 Big trust. Okay, big trust.

Speaker 1 Big trust. Big trust approved.

Speaker 4 Levels. It's trust levels.
Trust levels.

Speaker 4 Y'all got them levels and it's, you know, trust.

Speaker 1 Uh-huh, trust.

Speaker 1 Wait, so we want some more. We want some more.

Speaker 1 Just speaking of podcasts, though,

Speaker 1 is our trust level higher than your trust level when it comes to podcasting?

Speaker 5 I mean,

Speaker 5 y'all started off before us. So, you know what I'm saying? Y'all really got that trust between y'all.
Y'all big trust between y'all. Big trust.

Speaker 1 But, you know,

Speaker 5 there's levels to it all. So

Speaker 5 we steadily climbing.

Speaker 1 We're thick trusts. Have you guys ever been in a situation where you're like, maybe the trust levels have diminished a little bit since you guys aren't on the same team?

Speaker 4 Never that. Never that.
We blood. It goes way deeper than football.
It goes way deeper than in between the lines.

Speaker 5 No doubt. I was like before I

Speaker 4 keep leveling.

Speaker 1 Okay, all right.

Speaker 1 They keep leveling, but let me ask you, I'll ask you, Cam. Actually, no, I'll ask you, Mark, Saints versus Ravens in the Super Bowl, you

Speaker 1 run,

Speaker 1 you run the ball. Maybe there's a fumble.
You don't fumble, but maybe there's a fumble. And Cam Jordan's in the pile, and he's maybe big trust in your nuts and grabbing and gouging that.

Speaker 4 No, no, no.

Speaker 1 Does that bring the trust levels down?

Speaker 1 Hey,

Speaker 1 we played a right way.

Speaker 1 I don't know what that had to do with being in a pile.

Speaker 4 That's not what we do. If you trust the nuts,

Speaker 4 that's not what's happening.

Speaker 1 There's no trust on the nuts.

Speaker 4 That's no trust.

Speaker 1 That's a no trust. That's no trust.
Yeah. The scrotum is a no trust.

Speaker 4 Got it. Negative trust.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Okay.

Speaker 5 Nothing would make me more excited than to play the Ravens in the Super Bowl. That means we've both reached the pinnacle of winning.
That being said, if we're in a pile and we're fighting,

Speaker 5 we're looking for the football, the leather-bound football. We're not looking for any other

Speaker 1 leather. You know what I mean?

Speaker 1 Yes. I got you.

Speaker 1 All right, so Cam, I have a bone to pick with you for two things. One is your Blake Bordles quote.
What's your problem, man? Blake's a good guy. He's our friend.
There was a Blake Bordle quote? Yeah.

Speaker 1 There was a Blake Bordles quote.

Speaker 4 Cam always snapping off somebody.

Speaker 5 What you say about blake man i have no idea is he he he just got back in the league right yeah he's back

Speaker 4 you call you call kyler midget on his top 100 what you say about blake man you said you it came off the cuff that wasn't my fault Okay, you said

Speaker 1 you said about Blake, I think it was, hold on, I'm going to try to find the exact quote, but I think it was something along the lines of,

Speaker 1 we're practicing against Drew Brees. He makes us better.
It's not like Blake Bordle's out there throwing picks.

Speaker 1 That's not trust. That's not trust.

Speaker 5 What you just did is not being trust right there because it's all factual.

Speaker 1 Blake Bortles has the only interception in like two years.

Speaker 5 And that's all I'm saying.

Speaker 5 The facts won't lie. People lie.
Facts do not.

Speaker 1 Blake Bortles

Speaker 1 never lost any snaps to Taysom Hill. Actually,

Speaker 1 that's a good point. Are you ever jealous because you know that no matter what you do,

Speaker 1 Sean Payton will never love you as much as he loves Taysom?

Speaker 5 Luckily,

Speaker 5 I've never been and looked for love from a head coach. All my head coaches have always been offensive-minded.
I wouldn't know what to do with the defensive-minded head coach.

Speaker 5 I would be big lost.

Speaker 1 Okay, okay. And then

Speaker 1 the other one was when you said Big Ben's not a Hall of Famer.

Speaker 5 What I really meant, they were like, hey, is Big Ben a first ballot Hall of Famer in my mind? He said first ballot. I was like, Ben will probably get there.

Speaker 5 In my mind, I heard first ballot. I was like, no, it's going to take him a year or two.
You know, he might be two years out.

Speaker 4 And then

Speaker 4 three ballot. You know, my daughter said he's Hall of Fame, but just not first ballot.
That's what he said.

Speaker 5 Hey, absolutely. I mean, the numbers that he's put up, he's going to get in there.
And I was like, yo,

Speaker 5 he's fighting. You can fight to put him in your top five of his era.
And then I went through it. Again, facts lie.
People don't.

Speaker 1 But you know what?

Speaker 1 It's going to be awesome when he gets in the Hall of Fame. He's going to have some sort of injury when he's walking up behind the podium.

Speaker 1 He's going to be like on crutches or in a walking boot, maybe have like one of those old-timey fever things, like bags filled filled with ice on his head because he's got a headache.

Speaker 1 Big Ben's induction speech is going to be worth the price of a mission.

Speaker 5 I mean, look, what are they? Like 3-0 this year? Look, at this point,

Speaker 5 you know, he's back and apparently he's throwing really well. And I mean, you knew what Big Ben has been in this league.
I mean, he's been a force to be reckoned with. Super Bowl champion.

Speaker 5 I'm just trying to get there.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Mark.

Speaker 4 I got to have it.

Speaker 1 Well, it seems like you guys have a pretty good handle right now. You know how to like stir up some controversy.

Speaker 1 That's podcasting lesson number one is like say something inflammatory to get people talking about you.

Speaker 1 So I'm going to give you a chance right now, Mark Ingram, if you want to say that you think that Jameis Winson should be the starter in New Orleans.

Speaker 4 Do I think he should be?

Speaker 1 Yeah, just get people talking about the podcast.

Speaker 5 He said that you're already going for divisive statements.

Speaker 1 We're not here.

Speaker 5 I need you to stop being presidential elect number 45 and come over here to the calmer side of life.

Speaker 1 Do I think he should be? Yeah.

Speaker 4 I think he's exactly where he's supposed to be at the time and place where he's supposed to be there. I don't know.
I can't just throw Drew Breezy to the wolves. Like, he's still Drew Breezy.

Speaker 4 He's cold. He's a bad mother.
You know what I mean?

Speaker 4 So I can't just, you know,

Speaker 4 excommunicate my dog like that. I mean, you got to put some respect on Drew Breezy.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 We struggle with that at times. Although, I mean, I respect his career

Speaker 1 big time. He's a first bout Hall of Famer.
Mark, sticking with you, how mad do you get every time they post the Derrick Henry Mark Ingram picture? And can you explain why you looked so small?

Speaker 4 Bro, bro, that shit is so lame, bro.

Speaker 4 Like, they literally screwed me on all levels. For one, the dude was 6'4 ⁇ , 250-power running back, alien DN.

Speaker 4 And, you know, and they put the camera closer to him. I'm further away, so I'm already shorter.
And then you let the camera adjustment angles trick you to make me look shorter than I actually am.

Speaker 4 I'm not 5'1. Shit.
Like, that's what it makes you look like. 4'11.
But no,

Speaker 4 no, he's just a big dude, man. I mean, shit, I'm 5'10.
He's 6'4. I mean, what it's supposed to look like.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I mean, it's an all-time picture. And I agree.
Like, if you post that, you're lame. Whatever.
That's not big trust. Never done it.
Yeah, actually, verbal meme.

Speaker 4 That's weak trust.

Speaker 1 Yeah, weak trust. No trust.
Verbal meme, Mark Ingram, weak trust. Derrick Henry, big trust.

Speaker 1 Oh, we wouldn't post it.

Speaker 1 That's an example of something. We wouldn't post it.

Speaker 4 Y'all going to make me, boy. Where are y'all at?

Speaker 5 So you don't have to come see me.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 4 Me messed up.

Speaker 4 I'm really like that. I'm really about that for real.

Speaker 1 The craziest thing. None of that.

Speaker 1 I couldn't believe this when I looked this up, but the fact that, Mark, you're the first Alabama player to ever win the Heisman. That's crazy.
So it's just you and Derrick Henry.

Speaker 1 When you won that at Alabama, you won a national title too. But was there a moment where you're like, I'm set for life because

Speaker 1 I'm like in the records book. I'm a legend no matter what happens just for this?

Speaker 4 Man, I think like,

Speaker 4 you know, I always try to elevate, man. So, like, yeah, I won that.

Speaker 4 Like, it was crazy because just all the championships, all the all-Americans, all the great players that then came through there and they never had a husband.

Speaker 4 So just to be able to bring that trophy and fill that void in the legacy of Bama, you know, I was proud to do that. But, you know, I'm just, they trying to level up.
Stay trying to do more.

Speaker 4 Stay trying to accomplish more.

Speaker 4 But I know if all else else fails i can go back to tuscaloosa and live like a king so right i am you know i mean but yeah you know i just i just i just appreciate the love you know that's always home for me did sabin smile when you won the heisman because we're convinced he never smiles i'm not sure that he smiled actually i'm not he might have grinned winced i don't know

Speaker 4 but i'm not sure that he actually like cracked a real like teeth smile like you know what i mean

Speaker 4 but yeah but he i know he was proud of me though but he wanted us to win a championship. So he was just trying to get over that obstacle so we can go focus on winning a championship.

Speaker 4 That's all he worried about.

Speaker 1 So, Cam, we just watched

Speaker 1 the Packers and the Saints on Sunday night. Drew, or not Drew Brees, Aaron Rodgers seemed to really take advantage of there being no crowd of the Superdome.

Speaker 1 And the announcers kept talking about how great his hard count was. What's the difference between a good hard count and just a normal hard count?

Speaker 1 Is it just like saying certain words strangely or at higher volumes? How do you become good at at doing a hard count probably the opposite of those two

Speaker 5 whatever you just said the opposite of that i mean it's it's it's like it's along lines of keeping the same cadence like you know you couldn't tell his his real his real uh cadence from you know a a fake one or elevated pitch you know um there was no like emphasis like oh this is like how he's going to get you off the sides it's like this normal cadence and they took he take it all the way down to the to the wires on on a couple of them.

Speaker 5 I mean,

Speaker 5 you've got fake counts going with the play clock going down to like three, and then he just like rally it up and still call it. So, I mean, that's all that was.

Speaker 5 I mean, it got us off sides two times, and really, even the second time, I was like, bro, he was like, the play clock was at zero. That should have been a penalty on them before it was on us.

Speaker 5 I was like, what do we,

Speaker 5 at the end of the day, that's why he's Aaron Rodgers. You know, he does a great job of commanding his huddle.

Speaker 1 Is it really weird? And we'll start with you, Cam. How weird is it? We haven't had a player on yet this season.
How weird is it to be in the stadium with no fans and no sound?

Speaker 5 like does do they play the sound over the speakers does it feel like anything or are there moments where it's hard to get hyped up because there's no juice in the stadium i mean you definitely feed off the fans so you you don't have that aspect to it but anytime you touch the field i mean it's not like you it's not like a summer practice where you're just going against guys that you know you've been going against for the last 20 something days it's a new opponent i mean every time we touch the field it's like we still have that same mentality it's like hey we've got to impose our will we've got to do this we've got to take away x player we've got got to, you know, be three yards in the backfield.

Speaker 5 So, I mean, there's always juice there, but there's just not that escalated level that you feel from the fans

Speaker 5 where you can just like on third down, you can't hear yourself or talk or whatever.

Speaker 5 So if anything, it just makes every game sort of like an away game where the offense is able to adjust, readjust, check defenses, you know, whatever it is, and everybody have this clear line of communication where normally they wouldn't have that.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Has it been easier for you, Mark, on the offensive side of the ball, like just communication?

Speaker 1 And does it feel like the offense runs smoother when you don't have to deal with the crowd on the road?

Speaker 4 Yeah, I mean, definitely.

Speaker 4 You know, that's one of the challenges in overcoming, you know, an away game is being able to navigate and function at a high level with crowd noise, you know, going on silent count, all of that.

Speaker 4 But now that you don't have that, you're able to use cadence. You're able to hear, you know, the calls clearly in the huddle.

Speaker 4 more times than not. And

Speaker 4 yeah, but

Speaker 4 once that ball kick off and once that, you know,

Speaker 4 you line up against another team, it's go time, man. It's ready to go.

Speaker 4 Really trying to make something happen, trying to make plays to help the team win.

Speaker 4 And, you know, we had 250 fans, I think, just only, you know, household, family, people to live under your roof at the stadium.

Speaker 4 And like, you know, we was, you know, we was down seven in the fourth and, you know, we could hear them all, you know, going defense and stomping on the bleachers.

Speaker 4 I was like, man, this feel like high school a little bit. You know, back in high school, you only had your parents and a couple students in the stand going crazy.

Speaker 4 And uh, you know, but uh, so it was even exciting to have just 250 people there last night.

Speaker 4 So, yeah, uh, it's definitely different playing in an empty stadium, but you got to make it happen regardless.

Speaker 1 I saw that Steve Young was like the only person who was allowed in the stands last night because he was there doing Monday Night Football, like uh, post-game stuff.

Speaker 1 So, Steve Young was like, I think he was second row, and nobody else was in the entire stadium. Was he yelling at the field? Could you hear Steve Young?

Speaker 4 Well, no, we had we had 250 family members at the game, So I guess he was one of those. He was amongst those family members.

Speaker 1 It was 249 plus Steve Young. Steve Young.

Speaker 4 But no, I ain't here Steve. I ain't here Steve at all.
I ain't here Steve at all.

Speaker 1 We're big fans of Sean Payton and his motivational techniques. We've had him on the show before we like to talk about the different things that he does.

Speaker 1 Like I remember one time he put a gas can in everybody's locker to remind everybody to keep enough fuel going throughout the season.

Speaker 1 But I think my favorite one was he like showed you videos of rats dying, of rats like getting caught in traps

Speaker 1 to eat the cheese, right?

Speaker 4 Eat the cheese.

Speaker 1 What was that about?

Speaker 5 Yeah, it was, I think we must have been on a winning streak. And it's like, you know, when everything's going good, everything's positive, you're going to have all these yes men in your life.

Speaker 5 You're going to have everybody like, yeah, like there's no way you guys can lose. All these people are going to pump you up with all these random stats.

Speaker 5 Like, hey, you know, every time you get a sack and a half, the Saints never lose, or some like, you know, some openly like weird situation, like, oh, like, it's impossible for Dr.

Speaker 5 Brees not to throw 300 yards a game or whatever whatever it is it's like don't eat the cheese don't don't buy into all this hype and just stay stay you know keep the locker room within the locker room was really the moral of the story got it that makes sense so who's the bigger mark who's the bigger football guy we've had both coaches on our show before who's the bigger football guy harbaugh or payton man

Speaker 4 They both, you know, great, great coaches, man. They both great coaches.
They both love football. You know, Harbs, you know, he all about defense, special teams.

Speaker 4 You know, he loves his offense, but he's, you know, he's a defensive coach, special teams guy. And, you know, Sean Payne Straight, offensive genius, you know, but they both love the game.

Speaker 4 They both put their heart and passion into the game. So I'm just thankful in my career, I've, you know, played for two of the best coaches in the league, two of the best organizations in the league.

Speaker 4 So that's something I'm proud of.

Speaker 1 Okay, so you did that. Ooh, that real regal answer.

Speaker 5 That's what I'm talking about.

Speaker 5 My boy Mark, MVP.

Speaker 1 That was lame trust.

Speaker 4 Man, you know, that was lame trust.

Speaker 4 You can't get me to turn on my pee-pee's, man.

Speaker 1 No doubt.

Speaker 5 MVP. Mark V for president.

Speaker 1 Okay, so Mark,

Speaker 1 I would feel like a...

Speaker 4 I'll just keep it trill, Bill. Holy Phil.

Speaker 1 I would feel like a fraud if I didn't say this.

Speaker 1 And I'd like your take on this. I've called the Ravens frauds until you guys win a big game.
Is that fair?

Speaker 1 From the media perspective, is it fair that I'm keeping you guys motivated by saying you're frauds until you win a game where either you come back from a big deficit or win a playoff game?

Speaker 1 Is that fair?

Speaker 4 Hey, you know, you're entitled to your own opinion. And to say that it motivates us, I wouldn't necessarily say that because we really don't care what people think on the outside.

Speaker 4 So, you know, you're entitled to that opinion. And it is true.
We do need to win big games.

Speaker 4 We do need to play our best football on the biggest stages, but we're growing and we'll learn and we will strive to be that and win those big games and to become champions and to become Super Bowl champions because we have the guys in the locker room.

Speaker 4 We have the characteristics in the organization to accomplish those things. So that's what we're striving for.

Speaker 4 And it's not because of you saying that or anybody else saying that but it's just because of how we are in our on our team and in our organization but you should say he's heard it now though yeah he's like you've heard it now i've said it i just said it to your face and also now it is in the locker room he's not

Speaker 4 i don't care though yeah i ain't about to i ain't about to just be like oh yeah guess what buddy said like you feel me like nah we ain't rocking like that but it's in your head it's nice

Speaker 1 it's nice that he's doing it you ain't in my cheese going on

Speaker 4 you ain't in my head you just put it in the universe that shit go one through one ear, not the other of me. Like, I don't hear that.

Speaker 1 You're thinking about it.

Speaker 1 You're thinking about the efforts. I hear you, but I ain't listening.

Speaker 4 I hear you, but I ain't listening.

Speaker 1 You know what I mean?

Speaker 1 Okay. Mark, if it were up to you, would you guys ever punt on fourth down?

Speaker 4 There's sometimes, you know, fourth and eight, fourth and nine, you might have to punt, but, you know, fourth and medium, fourth and three and less. I like, I like, I like, I like Ravens.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Does it now, does it reverse though? Because most of the time, coaches will punt on fourth and three.

Speaker 4 When you guys do punt on fourth and three is it kind of a mind where it's flipped like why aren't we going for this not necessarily it just depends on the ebbs and flows of the game we have a strong defense and if we have the opportunity to pin somebody back and let our defense you know put pressure on somebody with their backs against the wall you know that might be the you know the correct decision at that moment in time depends on the ebbs and flows of the games depends on how the offense is playing how the defense is playing how the flow of the game is going so you know when we when it's time to be aggressive we'll be aggressive when it's time to play conservative and play the field position battle we'll do that whatever it takes to win.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 we'd be remiss to not at least mention it, Cam,

Speaker 1 the NFC championship game, the Rams, the worst call of all time, which, by the way, you guys then ruined football last year because you made everyone throw flags for past interference and slowed the game down.

Speaker 1 But I'm not mad. I'm not mad.
You had to do that.

Speaker 1 How...

Speaker 1 What was the locker room like after that?

Speaker 1 And was there any moment when people were like taking this to legislation?

Speaker 5 You're like, maybe they will let us come back out and play the end of this game again um yeah i don't i don't recall if they if you know we were even thinking about whether we play the end of the game at the end of the day you know the saints have have been on the uh i'm talking about the the pi the no pi yeah yeah the no pi yeah that was dead they ruined us yeah you were in that locker room too mark yeah right in the helmet yeah um there could have been multiple calls on that one but at the end of the day we we all know that the refs aren't going to you know actually do their jobs when it comes to us um

Speaker 5 we we put that on our shoulders as well knowing that we can't ever let a team get close as you've seen in the last two playoff runs if if we let them get close and we have to uh

Speaker 5 one do our jobs and make sure that we have

Speaker 5 gonna happen our way we have to take off with it and never look back and that's that's any game that we go into uh you can't look for outside excuses you have to you have to put it on us so we lost that game we looked inside said hey we're gonna be back in the playoffs we have to make more big plays and the next following year we were back in playoffs and ended up losing in overtime to the Vikings.

Speaker 5 And now here we are sitting where we're at. And we're like, hey, we've got to come together as a locker room.
It's not about where we've been or what we've done before.

Speaker 5 It's about what we're doing right now. Right now, it's not good enough.
Now we have to take it to another level.

Speaker 1 So which loss not to be like, this sucks to talk about, but which loss hurt more, the Minnesota Miracle or the Rams PI? I don't know.

Speaker 5 That's an off-season question. At this point, I'm so focused on trying to improve our record today, trying to improve our record now.

Speaker 5 I don't really recall those last three seasons. If you ask me what happened, you know, the last season, I know we ended up losing to the Vikings.

Speaker 5 I couldn't even tell you what game that was, where we were in the hash, because I'm worried about you know, this opponent we got coming up Sunday.

Speaker 1 Okay, that's a good answer. Mark, you have, I think, the coolest mouthpieces in football.
Is that something that you set out to accomplish when you became an NFL player?

Speaker 1 You're like, I'm going to change the game, I'm going to leave my stamp on the NFL, and I'm going to be known because I have really kick-ass mouth guards.

Speaker 4 Wait, can I pay attention to the details?

Speaker 5 This man started off trending in college. He was the first one to throw up the Alabama A's on the hands stamp.
He comes into the league. What does he do? He makes another stamp of what he does.

Speaker 5 And yet, nobody would follow it if he wasn't a Pro Bowler of his caliber, an elite player.

Speaker 5 If he was just a random special teams guy in college, not that there's anything wrong with him, but if he wasn't the Heisman Trophy winner that year, nobody remembered those gloves.

Speaker 5 If he wasn't a multiple-time Pro Bowler, nobody would take

Speaker 5 his mouthpiece for for anything this guy right here not only does he you know stamp with his style he stamps with his personality and his play

Speaker 1 that's my dog that's my brother from another right

Speaker 1 i think that's my brother from another right there but

Speaker 1 it might go the other way like what if what if you stepped onto the field and you had a you had a mouthpiece that was like swag level negative three

Speaker 1 you would you would probably like play a little bit worse don't you think because you need like you know you look good you feel good you feel good you you play good.

Speaker 4 If there's a mouthpiece swag level negative three, it is not touching, it's not going near my game bag. It's not going near my locker.

Speaker 4 That's going into the middle of the locker room and somebody else can choose it. You know what I mean?

Speaker 4 I'm not dealing with it. I'm sorry.
I got this for you guys. If you want it, if not, just leave it there.
But only the... Only the fly stuff.
You know, you got to have the drip.

Speaker 4 You got to have the details. I'm glad you paid attention to it.

Speaker 1 I mean, but no,

Speaker 4 I didn't set out to be mouthpiece king, you know what I mean, when I was a rookie, but you know, you always try to, you know, look good, feel good, play good, all that razzle-dazzle.

Speaker 4 So, yeah, appreciate you noticing, man. You're a real one.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I am. I am a real one.

Speaker 1 Do you think Alvin Kampie?

Speaker 1 Do you think Alvin Kamara is swagger jacking you, though? Because he's got some nice mouthpieces, too.

Speaker 4 Boy, he got

Speaker 4 grilled.

Speaker 1 Let me see. You grill?

Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 4 What? You grill. What?

Speaker 1 What? You grill, Paul.

Speaker 1 That's not a mouthpiece.

Speaker 5 That's real deal, Holy Field.

Speaker 4 No, that's real. That's a real mouthpiece.
Like,

Speaker 4 that's, you feel me? That's flawless diamonds dancing.

Speaker 1 Are those are real diamonds when he's wearing them?

Speaker 1 Flawless.

Speaker 1 That's not a mouthpiece. That's him.
Oh, my God.

Speaker 4 That's custom teeth mode.

Speaker 1 You'll see the boy just.

Speaker 1 He's wearing a visal line. He's wearing a visal.

Speaker 4 Boy, don't ever smile like that except to show you the flawless VV.

Speaker 1 Mark.

Speaker 4 We'll never see AK smile like that.

Speaker 1 What are the details? Because you always tell us to look at the details.

Speaker 4 Man, the details is mandatory.

Speaker 4 It could be the

Speaker 4 accessory to a fit. It could be your bag.
It could be your shoes. It could be the drawn butter on a fresh broiled lobster tail, the fried lobster tail.
You know, it could be anything.

Speaker 4 It's the important things, just the small things that matter. The details.
That could be the fresh cut, you know what I mean? With the waves different. you know what I'm talking about?

Speaker 4 It could be all that. You know, it's just the details.
However, may tickle your fancy. It's the details.

Speaker 1 Okay. So, like, the fact that I have nose hair every day,

Speaker 1 details?

Speaker 4 Them is details you need to get corrected.

Speaker 1 Okay, I think I understand what details are now. It's the little things, right? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Little things turn into big things.
And they matter. Yes.
They do.

Speaker 4 Essentials.

Speaker 1 Growers, not showers. Right.
Little thing. Like you get a Mark Ingram and it can grow into a Derrick Henry.

Speaker 1 Lord Jesus.

Speaker 4 It's a far.

Speaker 4 My goodness.

Speaker 4 I ain't going to put this fork in between me and my dog, man.

Speaker 1 Gee,

Speaker 1 I like you, come out, Derek. I respect what you guys do on the field,

Speaker 1 but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little protective of you stepping onto our turf in the podcast game. Now, that being said, we're trying to grow the game.

Speaker 1 I think the more good podcasts, the better. You know, a rising tide lifts all boats.
Do you guys have any questions for us on how to optimize your podcast and make it elite?

Speaker 4 What season is this for you guys?

Speaker 1 Season, we're in the year five. Well, we started on leap day, so really just a year.
I think like four and a half out of five, number one in sports, no big deal. That's big trusts.
Big. That's

Speaker 1 big. Million trusts.

Speaker 4 Hey, man, we're like sponges, man. Give us some advice, man.
Tell us how to take it to a a new level.

Speaker 4 Tell us how to challenge y'all for that number one spot because that's what we always shooting for, you know?

Speaker 1 Look, look,

Speaker 5 year one, just to get to year five, that's longevity.

Speaker 1 I see him.

Speaker 5 I see him playing in the Himalayas.

Speaker 4 Yeah. Seasoned veterans.

Speaker 1 Here's a tip. When I ask who's the bigger football guy,

Speaker 1 Harbaugh or Peyton, you answer it.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 4 So I make my guest answer. I don't necessarily have to answer it, but I make my guest answer.

Speaker 1 There we go. Yeah.
Yeah. Okay.
Okay. Okay.
Okay. Okay.
I got you.

Speaker 4 I got you. Okay.
I got you.

Speaker 4 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 4 You won't get me, but I'm going to get them, though.

Speaker 1 Right. Right.
Right. Do you have any questions for us along that line? I mean, I'll answer the question.
I think Sean Payton is a slightly bigger football guy. Well, I think Harbaugh is.

Speaker 1 But I think Tom Creen has Harbaugh's ear too much. I think Tom Creen's coming over whispering a little basketball play.

Speaker 4 Harbaugh is a football family, man. So I think you count out the Harbs.
The Harbs is a football family from,

Speaker 4 you know, Harbs,

Speaker 4 their dad to the brothers. You know what I mean? That's a football.
That's football genes. That's football legacy.

Speaker 4 Me and Cam know about that legacy.

Speaker 4 Yeah, legacy, big legacy. And that's on the B on me, I swear foe.

Speaker 1 Okay, all right. So I got one last question.

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Speaker 1 Sean Payton, who both of you guys obviously played for,

Speaker 1 when he had his, we'll call it a year off because it was not fair what happened to him, and we consider him a friend.

Speaker 1 He took up CrossFit, got in insane shape i've once done crossfit and gotten in change insane shape as well and then i just stopped doing crossfit and uh put on some pounds has anyone said to coach payton like hey you still doing crossfit because maybe you should get back to doing a little crossfit oh you you go ahead and take that camera

Speaker 5 no nobody said that nobody said that if anything uh if you don't know if you don't know some of these crossfit stories and how he he uh brought that into our uh conditioning test life,

Speaker 5 we're a little bit more excited that maybe he's not doing as much. He's transferred into boxing now.

Speaker 1 So now he's the worst day of my life.

Speaker 1 But he made you guys do CrossFit.

Speaker 1 That doesn't sound like a conditionitter. He tells everybody about his workouts and makes them do it.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 4 he had us do a CrossFit conditioning test, and then he had some CrossFitters come try and do the conditioning test that he made up for. us

Speaker 4 and they did not complete it.

Speaker 1 They did not complete the test, bro.

Speaker 4 You remember that cam? They did it. They like they was not making none of the times we was making, bro.
We was making legendary times. The CrossFitter just got up and was failing dramatically.

Speaker 1 I love it. Yeah, I love it.

Speaker 4 What was it? What was it? It was 10. It was 10 power cleans.

Speaker 1 Power cleans.

Speaker 5 It was 15, uh, 15 burpees, 20 ball squats.

Speaker 4 Air squats, 10 back, 20 back, 30 back, 40 back. Yeah, four sets of that.

Speaker 1 Four times, four times. And you guys killed them.

Speaker 5 Oh, yeah, absolutely.

Speaker 1 But just we, we didn't know we were killing them until the crossfit people did it i love that because crossfit

Speaker 5 like really is uh for people who aren't good at sports like when it when you boil it down it's good it's people who want to be competitive but they're not good at sports and really try hard yes really try hard yes have a lot of i hear you but i've seen some of those elite guys those elite the elite crossfitters yeah the ones that out there like at the top of the tops and then yeah and then ask them to dribble a basketball i would i would probably ask them to go like go join cross country before i did that like they could probably kill a marathon like it was probably the guys who were killing marathons that were like you know what this is too easy let's throw in some kettlebell weights and climb up this prone like you know it was just it's like it's like if you could do a marathon you might be able to then evolve into cross a crossfit you know what i mean then do a pull-up and pull myself up all the way up and no doubt

Speaker 1 all the way up

Speaker 1 Yeah, the cheating

Speaker 1 body weight. You're doing half a pull-up.
They're just swinging. They're in a to swing.

Speaker 1 Well,

Speaker 1 you guys are awesome. You're welcome on anytime.
Trust levels is your podcast.

Speaker 1 Everyone go listen.

Speaker 1 Cam and Mark, they've gotten into the podcast world. But yes, you're now recurring guests, so you have to come on anytime we ask.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 I got one last question for Mark. So, Mark,

Speaker 1 number 20, like, you know, as a running back that certain numbers are fast numbers and certain numbers are slow numbers, right? So, like, what numbers would you not wear as a running back?

Speaker 1 Because you're like, no, that jersey is gonna make me slow

Speaker 1 um

Speaker 4 anything in the 40s i can't wear you know ak makes the 41 look

Speaker 4 magical you know i mean yeah you know uh darren sprolls the 43 he he made a look he made some 40 numbers look great but i don't think i could pull the 40 off anything over

Speaker 4 i'm really a 20 guy it got to be 20 21 22 23 20 28 yeah 27

Speaker 4 you know them 30s i don't really want to touch them But 34, Walter Payne, legendary, Ricky Williams, legendary. But I'm a guy that likes to stay in the 20s, man.
I like to stay in the 20s.

Speaker 1 I think it's 35 and under. You can't go over 35.
But I also like how he's skinny. You can't go 36, 37, 38.
Yeah, 38 is slow.

Speaker 4 24, 24 is nice. 24 is nice, but it's a little boxy.
But I also think of legendary DVs when I think 24, you know, Champ Bailey, you know, Charles. Did Charles Wilson wear 24? He wore 21, didn't he?

Speaker 1 I think it was 21.

Speaker 4 But anyways, yeah, yeah, yeah. But, you know, Champ Bailey, 24, my OG, triple, you know what I mean? So I think of you know, some legendary DBs when I see 24.

Speaker 4 You know, Chubb wear 24, he's running that thing properly. But uh, I think the 20 numbers are good for back, you know, 30, 31, 32, 34, Ricky Williams, Walter Payton.
But I'm a 20s guy, yeah, agreed.

Speaker 1 Lower, lower 30s, you're getting into free safety, strong safety territory. You don't want that, yeah,

Speaker 4 um, or a big, big goal-line back type, right?

Speaker 1 Yeah, Right.

Speaker 1 All right. Well, thank you guys.
And, Mark,

Speaker 1 try not to think too much about me calling the Ravens frauds because I know it's like

Speaker 4 you're good, bro.

Speaker 1 I appreciate you, man. It's in you.

Speaker 4 I appreciate you. You know, it's all love.

Speaker 1 It ain't.

Speaker 4 I promise you. I ain't going to lose no sleep.

Speaker 1 Okay. But maybe I'm going to eat good.
But maybe a little.

Speaker 4 I'm going to go run some Warzone later.

Speaker 1 Oh,

Speaker 1 we got to link up. Yeah.
You know what I mean? Meet us in the gulag.

Speaker 4 Man, at me. Deuce getting loose.
You know what I mean? I'm a gulag champion. You know what I mean?

Speaker 4 AKA revive king aka down king aka sniper gang king aka just come see me i got big dubs in that too got me big

Speaker 1 trust love it all right yeah trust levels check it out uh thank you guys hopefully we're big trust now but we appreciate you coming on no y'all love bro we appreciate y'all having us on man keep plubbing us man so we can you know be battling for that number one spot what what what yeah

Speaker 1 that's what we'll do we'll pump you up until you get close and then we're just going to start a podcast war with you we're just going to be be ruthless.

Speaker 1 The trust warms.

Speaker 1 Trust only goes so deep when it comes to the top of the iTunes charts. Yes.
Yes.

Speaker 4 Verbal means.

Speaker 1 Part of my take is Derrick Henry. Trust levels is Mark Ingram.
That's where the podcasts are right now. Ooh.

Speaker 1 Oh, he's going. He's done it.
I see what you're talking about. That's just starting the war.
We're trying to help. We're trying to lift everyone up.
That's just starting the war.

Speaker 1 Now, here's what you do. Yeah.
You publicize your next podcast that comes out by saying, we respond to allegations that Big Truss is Mark Ingram and that part of my take is Derrick Henry. Yes.

Speaker 1 And then people listen to that. Then we feed off each other, you know? Iron sharpens iron.

Speaker 4 Okay.

Speaker 1 All right, guys. Thank you so much.
Best of luck the rest of the season.

Speaker 4 See you guys. All right.
Thanks.

Speaker 5 You guys take it easy.

Speaker 1 That interview with Big Trust was brought to you by our

Speaker 1 Hey, what's going on there, pal? We saw you at the hockey game on. Do I know you guys? I'm Ryan Whitney.
I got a drink named after me.

Speaker 1 not a big deal pink whitney that's what i thought see you fellas i invented the thing you pigeon pink whitney for legendary moments all right let's finish up we got uh fire fest fire fest of the week we do we got i i know we have a fire fest from jake too actually let's start with jake jake you're firefest why don't you start and then we'll go around the room we'll wrap up a great week pardon my take and then we'll wish everyone a happy uh football weekend thank you for the toss mr cotton why is he why are you sitting up so that was one of the worst successes I've ever seen in my life?

Speaker 1 Jets are back. Adam Space is back.
Absafe. Damn.
That was. I love watching the games while we're recording.
Like, you started the show and you're like,

Speaker 1 no, they like this. You know what I mean?

Speaker 1 And because Billy is very bad at it. Fernando Tatis has hit six home runs during the show.
Because he spoiled it earlier. My firefest earlier for some background noise was.

Speaker 1 It was cake day and I didn't get a cake. And then Billy's like, oh, that would be a shame if Hank really

Speaker 1 pulled out a fake cake that he was going to cake him with. Billy, that's good to do on a podcast.
I was getting cake,

Speaker 1 but Hank had a smirk on his face before I said, so there's something going on. But bottom line is, I will make your cake.
I honestly forgot.

Speaker 1 I mean, we need to lay off the doobies, Hank. Yeah.

Speaker 1 You're going to make it for tomorrow?

Speaker 1 If I can make it here, yeah, I'll make it. I'll make it tomorrow.
You're going to make it here? Do we have an oven? He's going to make it in the microwave. Do we have an oven? I think we have an oven.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we've got an oven. He's going to make it in the microwave.

Speaker 1 He's going to make it in the microwave. You know he's going to make it in the microwave.
This cake is going to be hilarious.

Speaker 1 It's because it's

Speaker 1 September and the NBA finals are on. It's like, I forgot basketball was even going on.
Yeah, that's it. That's my bad.
It's October. I agree.
It's all right. The Lakers are going to be.

Speaker 1 I don't need the cake. I'm going to make you the cake, Jake.
Don't worry. But everyone here wants the cake, too.
You can eat it. You can eat whatever you want, too.
Oh, wow.

Speaker 1 Jake's giving you permission, Hank. I'm going to make a weed cake.
Hank, you should make a 3chi cake. Oh, that would be good.
I'm gonna. Yeah, but don't tell anybody not be eating this cake.

Speaker 1 Oh, Jake, you have to eat the cake. No matter what, you have to eat the cake.

Speaker 1 No. Make an ecstasy cake.
And watch Jake just rub on.

Speaker 1 I'm going to make a Roman cake.

Speaker 1 You know what? I'll bring in some pacifiers from my son's crib, and you make an ecstasy cake, and in the middle will be pacifiers, and Jake will just suck on a pacifier for the rest of the day.

Speaker 1 Bring out some glow lights.

Speaker 1 I won the bat. Cash in the one.
Yeah, you're going to get a cake, a fire

Speaker 1 cake.

Speaker 1 Dude, you're going to feel great. It's going to feel great.
It's Friday. Yeah,

Speaker 1 it is Friday.

Speaker 1 Better not eat that cake.

Speaker 1 What if Jake took MDMA and everybody else gets super happy and Jake just can't stop cussing? Oh, that'd be awesome. That'd be awesome.

Speaker 1 Just unlocks the part of his brain that had been previously dormant. Jake, if you swear right now, I'll make sure that Hank doesn't put any drugs in the cake.

Speaker 1 Oh,

Speaker 1 man. No, because I don't have to eat the cake.
Okay. All right.
Hank, you're firefest. Yeah.

Speaker 1 My Fire Fest is that the person that lives above my apartment left their bath on. Oh, yeah.
Dude, this is. Wait, hold on.
That sounds crazy. We've been doing Firefest for a long time.

Speaker 1 This actually might be the first real Fire Fest. That's pretty bad.

Speaker 1 This is crazy. This is Monday morning.
I woke up, and it literally looked like in the movies, like when someone is trying to sneak in the ceiling, and they fall through

Speaker 1 the ceiling into the living room, and they're like, oh,

Speaker 1 didn't expect to see me here.

Speaker 1 Like, there's just a giant hole in my bathroom i can see into the person who lives above me apartment because they like left their bath on and at first it was just a you know like i walked in on monday morning and there was like a five to six inch bubble of water and then it just all fell all the way through so you can see the person when they're taking a shower now no i don't they haven't been there i haven't i haven't seen anything but like it's awkward where did it fall through to your bathroom into my bathroom and so what is uh there's been like people coming in and out of my apartment all week norman's going crazy having to I had to bring Norman to the office.

Speaker 1 Also,

Speaker 1 I was walking Norman last night and

Speaker 1 he's a little dog. So if I do like a small jogging, that's what they call it.
If I do like a small jog, he sprints that gets really tired, and I was doing that.

Speaker 1 I was in my slippers, and I just tripped and fell. And it was like the most embarrassing thing.
Luckily, no one was around me.

Speaker 1 It's been, what, a good two weeks since you've had an incident where you just fall over and get road rash? It was basically the same thing, except I wasn't going like 30.

Speaker 1 Did Normie come up to you and like sniff you and was like, Hank, are you dead? No, I literally just got up and was like, what the fuck?

Speaker 1 That would have been awesome if normie thought you were dead and like started to eat your ears you got a fall you got sustenance i'm gonna be here a while in the middle of manhattan um all right pfd you got fire fest yeah uh my fire fest of the week is that the xfl just announced that they're coming back not this year but next year ah so on one hand i don't have to get into shape yet on the other Like I'm just gonna get fat.

Speaker 1 I was actually like in the back of my head I was thinking okay tryouts are in you know four months I should probably try to get strong. I was asking Billy to start training me soon.

Speaker 1 Now I've got like an entire year extension on my big final project. So obviously, like, I'm just going to get, I'm just going to use that year to get fat.
Enjoy yourself. Cheat day.
Cheat day.

Speaker 1 Cheat day. Yeah.
Cheat year. Cheat year.
It starts right now. Do a cheat year.

Speaker 1 But I also realized that I'm going to be 37 years old when it kicks off. Oldest Xbox player ever.
Yes, that's right. I'm the oldest rookie in the history of football, I think.

Speaker 1 But like 37, when I said that out loud, I was like, at that point, I felt old for the first time in my life. That was when you first felt old.
In the back of my head,

Speaker 1 I've been feeling old for a while.

Speaker 1 I've been telling myself that I'm like 28.

Speaker 1 My brain feels like it's 28. The Halloween conversation we had.
Yeah, exactly. I feel like I'm a 28-year-old still.
And just knowing that in a year and like four months, I'm going to be 37. Like,

Speaker 1 I'm due for a midlife crisis. Yeah.
So will you just be a little bit more than that? Which is probably just actually

Speaker 1 thinking that I can be a football player and trying out for a professional football. That is my okay, now it's starting to make perfect sense to me.

Speaker 1 So are you going to still think you're 28 or are you going to graduate at 29? I think I got to jump to 30. Oh, wow.
That's how it's because that's old. I did that five years ago.
Yeah. It's scary.

Speaker 1 I'm going to be 37, which means I'll feel like I'm 30, which means I'm going to feel old. Yeah, which is basically like in your late 20s.
37 is

Speaker 1 37 is the first time in your 30s, though, that it sounds like you're old as shit.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I think 35 felt old. Yeah.
35 felt old. Am I old? Yeah.
Did he run for president? Am I old? Be honest. Be honest, Billy.
Okay, you guys are kind of old. Yeah, we're very old.

Speaker 1 Like, Steve

Speaker 1 is kind of like, oh,

Speaker 1 early 30s, now it's kind of like.

Speaker 1 We were born in the 80s. That's old.
Especially in this office. Feel even older.
Hank remembers the challenger. That's how old.

Speaker 1 Hank was cried the challenger. It's my first, yeah.

Speaker 1 Your first memory? It's a crazy documentary, honestly. It is.
I did see it. It pisses you off.

Speaker 1 My firefest is my ongoing

Speaker 1 need for public confrontation that goes nowhere i got mask shamed oh really yeah so i had a i had it i had it around my neck and i was walking outside which i'm pretty sure if you're walking outside and you're like i was walking outside the person was six feet away from me she she scolded me and was like i'm wearing a mask to protect you you're not wearing yours to protect me but isn't outside and six feet away totally good

Speaker 1 i think it it probably depends on what level of care in you're running into yeah can you just say a father? Well, I had my baby with me, but the best part was, so this is where I got my real high.

Speaker 1 She was wearing a Cleveland Indians hat, and I went back to her and I said, Your hat offends me. And we had a fucking moment.

Speaker 1 And it was awesome. Did she respect that? Was she like, okay, that was...
She was like, what are you talking about? It was fucking awesome. It felt so good.

Speaker 1 My thing is I try to remember. all the time, but sometimes I forget because I'm a forgetful guy.
Right. And I was walking in an area where there weren't many people at all.

Speaker 1 And like, it wasn't on the side. Oh, another pick.
Jets might be back. It wasn't like on a sidewalk.
It was like in a nice, like, park area where there weren't a lot of people.

Speaker 1 It's early morning, so there weren't a lot of people out. I had it around my neck.
I was very far away from everyone. She scolded me.

Speaker 1 So, what the problem is, is that when people catch you in a moment like that, they make a lot of assumptions that you're like an anti-mask.

Speaker 1 Right, when I had it around my neck, I just was just walking around. A more appropriate conversation would have been, hey, would you mind putting your mask on?

Speaker 1 But now everyone's everyone's so pissed at each other all the time.

Speaker 1 It's like you assume that because there's one thing about somebody that doesn't match up with what your preconceived notions are, that they're on the opposite side of an argument with you.

Speaker 1 When in reality, you're like, oh, yeah, I usually wear a mask. Right.
But you just caught me in a second where I didn't happen to have it up. Right.
And then I won up to her with the information.

Speaker 1 And it makes you want to wear it less because she yelled at you about it. Right, right.
Now I'm like, fuck this. You don't tell me what to do.
Yeah. But

Speaker 1 her brain locked up.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Bico's hard stand by and stand down. Yes, exactly.

Speaker 1 You stand back, baby.

Speaker 1 All right, Billy, your firefest.

Speaker 1 My fire fest is that I'm in the middle of writing an essay and I've lost all motivation to write the essay. It's only two letters.

Speaker 1 That's a dad joke. I'm getting older.
You guys are at that conversation I cannot relate to at all. The one we had like two seconds ago where you guys were talking about masks and stuff.
Yeah. What?

Speaker 1 Because you never wear one? No, no. You spit on people and you go to Walmart with

Speaker 1 your iPhone out being like, kick me out, I know my rights. No, it's because you guys sound old as hell.
For wearing masks? No, for that whole conversation about just like...

Speaker 1 Wearing shoelaces is old as hell. Am I right, Billy? Yeah.
What was the mask? What was the old about that?

Speaker 1 Who was old? You guys would be like two different people's size

Speaker 1 talking about like... Billy, it's because I was able to complete a thought without making a dick joke.
Billy's like... No, it's just a joke.
Oh, what the fuck? No, it was just an old...

Speaker 1 It was an older conversation. Like, I would not have that conversation with my friends.
Well, would you, give us, let's do a

Speaker 1 read us some of your group text.

Speaker 1 Yeah, read us your group text.

Speaker 1 I want you to tell the story that Big Cat told, but pretend it happened to you. Yeah, and

Speaker 1 I'm in a lobby playing Call of Duty with you. Yeah, we'll do a number while we do it.
But go ahead. Read the group text.

Speaker 1 30. 17.
18. 8.
65.

Speaker 1 Some guy said he's he no one will believe him, but he's guessing right two days in a row. Right.
I believe him. What is it? 92.

Speaker 1 92. 92.
Albert Hainsworth. All right.

Speaker 1 Recently arrested?

Speaker 1 Probably. Yeah.
I think so.

Speaker 1 I mean,

Speaker 1 probably. I saw him in the news.
That guy. Yeah, Albert Hainsworth arrested on domestic assault charge.
Garter snakes have orgies. Disavowed.
Not the garter snakes. No,

Speaker 1 give us your bros. Let's pretend we're your brokes.
Like, bro, what do you want to do tonight? You want to rip some box, and then you don't know if I'm talking about extra. Give us the group me.

Speaker 1 Give us the group me. That's where everything goes down.
I'm not giving them the group me. Oh,

Speaker 1 Billy just finstagrammed us. Yeah, we.

Speaker 1 You won't show your parents. You're not going to feel anything that he's going to say.
Billy, just act like you had that exact same experience that Big Cat had. So, like, a lady says, put on a mask.

Speaker 1 And I'm like,

Speaker 1 okay, word. Sorry I didn't put it on because I'm a respectful young man.
Word. You sound so old, Billy.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 No, that was respectful. Okay, boomer.
Respecting elders. All right.
Everyone, enjoy your football weekend. We will see you Monday, Sunday night.
And wear a mask. And the Jets are back.

Speaker 1 Adam Gace, you have a contract extension. I think you have to at this point.
Got to lock

Speaker 1 offensive talents. Listen, when a game like this happens in primetime, it means about 10 times more for your financial security with that team.

Speaker 1 I also, I've been watching the quarterback play from the Broncos. I think John Elway just watches the mechanics and never watches the results of the play.

Speaker 1 He's like, yeah, that was a good-looking throw. Yeah.
You stood tall in the pocket, young man. Well, it's like being wrong.
If you show your work, you can still get partial credit. That's true.
Right.

Speaker 1 Love you guys.

Speaker 1 We're talking away.

Speaker 1 No, I don't know what I'm going to say. I'm saying anyway.

Speaker 1 Today isn't my day. To find you shy away.

Speaker 1 off and come for your love okay.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 needless to say

Speaker 1 I'm sitting senior

Speaker 1 feet. Stonewall is away.

Speaker 1 I'm slowly learning that life is okay.

Speaker 1 Say after me.

Speaker 1 At least we're better to be safe.