Ep. #658: Roger Daltrey, Kellyanne Conway, Joshua Green

I'm Scott Hansen, host of NFL Red Zone.

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Welcome to an HBO podcast from the HBO Late Month series, Real Time with Bill Maher.

Hi, everybody.

How are you doing?

Thank you.

Thank you, people.

How are you?

How are you down there?

Thank you.

Thank you, everybody.

I appreciate that.

Thank you very much.

All right, we got a great show.

Let's get to it.

Thank you.

Well, today I'm going to say it a little differently.

I know why I'm happy.

They reclassified weed.

I don't know if you saw this story.

This is a very big issue.

A lot of good people have been working on this for a very long time.

Marijuana has been a classified

Schedule 1, which means it's lumped in with acid and lots of really serious drugs.

Now they finally did this after decades working on this.

It's now classified three.

I think it's in the same category as Tylenol.

Truly.

Not that,

let's be fair, not that they're exactly alike.

I would never do Tylenol before the show.

But it's a very exciting time of year now for parents and kids who are going on to college.

It's Decision Day, which this week.

That's what kids decide, or they find out, if they're going to get the tent of their choice.

I had to go have a safety tent.

Nothing wrong with the safety tent.

But no,

the police finally this week said enough's enough, and they broke up a lot of these encampments that are going on around the country.

Yeah, the kids are fighting each other.

Did you see this?

The University of Alabama.

Oh man, this says a lot about a lot of things in this country.

There was pro-Israeli demonstrators and anti-Israeli demonstrators.

And at one point, they were both chanting, fuck Joe Biden.

And they said he couldn't unite America.

Ha, ladies and gentlemen,

that's not a good sign for the election.

But no, it's amazing.

Some of the kids in the tent, some of them are the pro-Palestinian demonstrators are Jewish.

I cannot wrap my mind around this.

Jews camping?

Meanwhile, the homeless here are like, can we have your dorm rooms this long?

And some of these encampments are getting pretty grungy.

The kids say they would love to do laundry, but they ate all the Tide Pods.

So I don't know if this interests you, but the Kentucky Derby is this weekend.

Yeah, I feel the same way.

But listen, this is pretty interesting.

The winning horse will make $3.1 million,

and the losers will be shot by Christy Noam.

Have you been following this story?

We did it here last week.

I thought it was a small story.

Now it's the biggest thing in the country.

Christy Noam, she's the governor of, governor, yeah, of North Dakota, and auditioning to be vice president, as so many are these days for Donald Trump.

So she puts out a book and thinks it's going to make her look like a badass.

She tells the story when she shot her 14-month-old dog.

Of course, it made her the most unpopular politician ever.

I mean, like, no, she thought she was going to win over people.

Nope, liberals don't like it.

Conservatives don't like it.

You know who likes it?

Cats.

She got the cat people,

or just the cats.

And I've heard people defend her.

They say, well, you know, shooting a dog is normal in some parts of the country.

Yeah, so is fucking your sister.

It doesn't make it right.

And of course, Trump had to weigh on in this.

Like a dog.

He had to weigh in.

He said shooting a dog is acceptable, but only if the dog is shoplifting.

I mean.

In other animal abuse news, we know now that bird flu, we reported this last week, moved to the

dairy area,

and they think it's because we're feeding the cattle chicken shit.

Yeah.

If you think that's gross because of what came out of a chicken's ass, just enjoy your eggs tomorrow.

And

finally,

it is Cinco de Mayo this weekend, which

is always, I must say,

I've lived here in LA 40 years.

It was always a big thing.

Bigger than in a lot of other parts of the country.

I understand that.

We always had so much fun.

Last few years, I've noticed, you know, not so much fun because because people are afraid of cultural appropriation.

Well, I just want to say this year, just fucking enjoy it, okay?

And because

anybody who was going to give you shit about that was just arrested at UCLA.

Okay.

We've got a great show.

Kelly Ann Conway and Joshua Green are here.

But first up, as the front man for the Who, he is one of the greatest rock singers of all time.

His solo North American tour kicks off in Pennsylvania on June 10th.

His newest single, Going Home, is available to download now and raises funds for Teen Cancer America.

Roger Daltrey.

There he is.

Hello, sir.

Great pleasure.

How are you?

Okay.

How are you?

Thank you.

You look great, too.

Bag of of laundry.

Well, you know, I was looking through some old pictures of you, as I often do.

First of all, I just got to say, thanks for all the entertainment over the years.

I mean, you really are...

I have to say,

thank you, because without your support,

what would have happened?

I would have been a sheet metal worker.

And I wasn't very good at it.

Yeah, I don't think it ever would have been that.

I feel like if anyone was born to be a rock god, like they made it in a lab.

I mean, look at yourself here.

I mean, look at some of these pictures to you.

Yeah.

Oh, dear.

That's a little too much information.

No.

I don't remember ever when I was a kid seeing you with a shirt on.

And it went on for many years after.

Do you remember how old you were when you were finally put a shirt on

for the concert?

What it was, I get incredibly hot when I sing.

I don't know why.

It's like a furnace.

So does the audience.

So I just, I feel restricted with a shirt on.

I took it off and I...

It's wonderful.

Well, it used to be.

Not quite when you're 80 years old.

80, is that what you are now?

Wow.

Yeah, yeah.

I was looking over some some of the other album covers.

I mean, I have the original LPs.

And I always was curious, as long as I have you here, I'm going to ask you about the one for Who's Next, which is one of the greatest albums of all time.

What is the pissing on Stonehenge?

What was that about?

It was two photos put together.

It was a concrete obelisk that was holding up what was a slag heap from a coal mine because we had a disaster in England,

in Wales, where one of the slag heaps slipped down on a village and wiped the village out.

So they put these big concrete blocks in,

which, you know, for us it looked like the beginning of

2001 Space Odyssey.

So we thought, well, that's an interesting photo, but when we got to it, it was kind of boring.

It was a piece of concrete lump.

and we thought well how do you make something

we just got out of the group van we thought well

we can use it as a rhino

then it became a competition where who could who'd have the highest pee

well

i mean

You're very competitive.

And that's a good thing in music, in art.

Especially when you're peeing.

Right.

But I mean, like, look, Pete Townsend, one of the great songwriters of all time.

But people don't listen to

songwriters.

They listen to songs.

So I guess what I'm asking is, do you think he appreciates you?

We're still together.

I mean,

even though

it's always been friction, but that's what makes it so special.

I think he does.

I think he does.

Well, that's good to hear, because fans, we don't want mommy and daddy to fight, you know.

And they always do.

Why can't people in bands like each other?

I get along with my co-workers.

There's no Simon and Garfunkel here that we don't talk to each other.

But

we existed on friction.

And

that's where

the really good creation comes from.

So he had some great ideas, but then, you know, Keith would have ideas, John, and everybody would pitch in and it would take a great idea into being a fantastic idea.

And that's what bands are really all about, chemistry.

Yours seemed more violent.

Yeah, we were.

I was in a band.

I was the only straight guy with three addicts.

They were addicted to everything.

You name it.

Whatever was on the table, they would take it and take it in great amounts.

Whatever was on the bar they would drink it and drink it in great amounts.

It wasn't easy to control that lot.

So someone had to, so now and again say, come on.

Right and you lost your drummer from that.

Well yeah, yeah that was kind of fun.

And you're doing a documentary about him, Keith Bulletin.

No, it's not, it's a, it's a, for want of a word, and I hate the word now because there are so many of them me and Done.

It's a biopic.

But I've worked on it for 30 odd years because I'm determined to make a proper film.

Cinema to me has lost its way.

They don't know whether it's to be cinema or streaming on TV or in a theater.

I mean, they're making three and a half hour films.

In my opinion, that's an insult to an audience.

Anyone can sit for three and a half hours without going out for a pee.

They deserve a medal.

I mean,

it's fat.

I want to make...

I want to make a film of Keith Moon because he had an incredible life.

He was extraordinarily talented.

He was the funniest man I've ever met in my life.

He often said Rock's greatest drummer.

He was.

He was fantastic.

They call him sloppy, but he was anything but.

And he was the only guy I know that could make Peter Sellers laugh.

He was a really funny guy, but

in his personal life, he was very serious.

But Keith could have him on the floor in fits of laughter.

So I've wanted to make this film for ages that is a roller coaster of a real life of someone so talented in so many ways, but he doesn't know how to use it.

And it's kind of, it's painful, but it's joyous.

It's tragic.

There's so much in it.

There's so much narrative

that is based in music and comes from his, just from his genius.

And I want to put it on a screen and make a film again that runs for no longer

two hours, 15 minutes.

It's an interesting dynamic, the one guy in a group, and it doesn't have to be a musical group, I've been in situations like this, I wasn't the sober guy.

But where there is one guy who doesn't want to go along, it creates an incredible amount of tension.

People don't like it for some reason.

However many times you have a drink, I'm having one.

No, I'm okay.

Come on, have one with me.

What's the difference?

I used to have a drink.

Who do you?

I used to have a drink bill.

I'm no angel.

No, I know what you mean.

But, you know, I never used to get out of my face and smash hotel rooms up.

Right.

For me,

I was born in an air raid in the Second World War in 1944.

My mum was

came into labor in a tube station.

That's where they used to go in the shelters.

And she thought things were bad, but then she had me.

So, and when, you know, post-war England, we were bombed out.

Both ends of our street were rubble.

We had it hard for 15, 20 years.

And so, my first guitar, I had to make it.

We hadn't had no money to buy it.

We get ex-War Department amplifiers that made this squeak of a noise, but we built cabinets that were huge, so it looked important.

And it worked.

Psychology is everything.

They must be good.

Look at the size of their equipment.

Well, there is something to that.

But it seems like you were the sort of the more conservative one in the group, and that's okay.

I mean, I was going to ask you about the politics.

A lot of people are going to be able to do that.

Well, Pete says I'm right-wing.

I'm actually not.

No, I didn't say you were right-wing.

I'm just saying.

Well, he says I am.

Who says?

Pete, because he likes to be left-wing.

So I have to be the right-wing one.

Right.

It's nice and trendy to be left-wing.

But I'm always curious to talk to the people from the UK because our politics sort of does track with each other.

I mean, we had Brexit.

That's the media.

Oh, you don't think it's similar?

Well, it is, but equally, when I.

We've got problems in England, make no bones about it.

We have, certainly.

But then when I look at your country, we haven't got any problems at all.

Well, I mean.

I mean,

we have a.

You know that we have a president that when he dances, he looks like he's jerking off two guys at once.

You think like that?

I make no comment.

I make no.

That's awful.

Every week.

That's seriously awful.

So, okay, before I leave.

The difference is, of course, that we haven't got guns.

So we look at you and we go, whoa.

Life is good.

A lot of people get stabbed, though.

In England.

Yeah, well,

A lot of people get stabbed anywhere in the world, but the newspapers are using it because

it sells newspapers.

People are only interested in events that are violent.

I don't know.

It's always been going on.

But now, since the age of the internet, it's instantly online or somewhere where they can pick it up and print it.

Okay.

I know you're out on tour.

I'm not going to hold you too long.

I know this tour means a lot to you.

It's for teen cancer, which is your big cause.

And you're raising money.

Thank you.

How long do you play for now?

Well it depends.

Minimum of 90 minutes.

I usually end up doing about two hours.

What songs do you still love?

Love to sing?

What songs never get forward?

I love them all.

Oh, like your children?

It depends which...

There's only one I'm bored with that won't get forward again.

And it's because it's stuck to a computer track.

Right.

And it drives me insane because I can't move it.

But you still do it.

I still do it.

The fans want to hear it.

Of course.

You've got to do it for the fans.

I love them all.

The one I like singing probably most

is Love Rain on Me.

Oh.

Thank you.

Yeah, I'll be there.

But there's so many great ones.

Listen, thanks again.

Just for coming here, for doing what you've done for all these years.

It gave me a lot of pleasure, my friend.

All right.

Roger Gopher, everybody.

All right.

Let's meet our panel.

Okay, here they are.

He is the Bloomberg Business Week national correspondent whose book is called The Rebels, Elizabeth Warren, Bernie Sanders, AOC, and the Struggle for a New American Politics.

Josh Green's over here.

And

see, you know who this is, the former senior counselor for President Trump, a New York Times best-selling author, and a Fox News contributor.

Kellyanne Kellyanne Conway, my birthday twin.

Okay.

So your boy had a big interview.

He's on the cover of Time magazine.

I'll bet you puts that on his wall.

I know he loves when he's on the cover of magazines.

Since you're the Trump whisperer, I thought we would ask you first of all.

What?

Nobody knows him better than Kelly Ann.

He was asked the other day if he would unconditionally accept the results of the upcoming 2024 presidential election, I'll read his answer.

If everything's honest, I'll gladly accept the results.

If it's not, you have to fight for the right of the country.

That sounds like elections only count when we win all over again.

And isn't this the problem with him?

From the beginning, it hasn't changed.

He does not accept election results.

Under what world is there going to be this where he says, if everything's honest, oh yeah, I lost.

We've never seen it.

Please admit, we'll never see that.

He will never admit an election lost.

Well, first of all, this was said, thanks for having me back, Bill.

We've been doing this for decades together.

Secondly,

Donald Trump was accused of not being able to accept the election results in 2016.

Hillary Clinton made a big deal of it and the final debate.

It's so shocking.

It's so un-American.

And he did accept those election results.

She didn't.

She still says.

He won that one.

Correct.

Yes.

And you know what?

And he'll win in 2024.

And I'll win.

He accepts the ones he wins.

He wants to win in 2024.

But I think his point is important in this way.

For some reason, early voting is no longer a 6.30 a.m.

on November 5th.

It goes on for 45 days in some states ahead of time.

They count the ballots afterwards.

As somebody who has never said election fraud, stolen election, all of that from 2020, I will say that it's important that we have states that count the early votes early and then add together the votes that were cast at election day and give us results that night.

This shouldn't be difficult in the world's greatest democracy.

I agree.

But I think this is all a new point because the polls suggest, and I think the momentum that he's got right now suggests if everything keeps going as it is and I take nothing for granted, he probably will be re-elected.

A million things could happen.

Oh, right.

And if Biden were ahead in the polls, if the CNN poll had Biden at 49 and not 43, and Trump at 43 and not 49, and if young people weren't leaving Joe Biden, we'd say, well, he has it in the bag.

It is really good.

We can get to all that.

It has nothing to do with the fact that he will not concede an election.

No, it doesn't.

And also, if Democrats were ahead, they'd still be wedding the bed because that's what Democrats do.

But the big takeaway,

the big takeaway on that...

Because I talk to Democratic strategists all the time, just like I'm sure you do.

No, and they're all, no matter how big the lead is, they're always worried that somebody somehow is going to blow it, or the youth vote won't turn out, or a hidden Trump vote will turn out.

They should be because I think of bedwedding and Biden in the same sentence.

Okay, that's not bad.

Problem for Biden is that

the problem for Biden is that so do millions of other Americans, and I think that's why he's trailing in the polls.

But look,

like Bill said, it's May, and his opponent is in the middle of a criminal trial.

So it's not like Biden has any hope of mounting a comeback.

Okay, let me ask you this.

Say he wins.

You're confident in because

I said a thing, say they are.

I take that for granted.

Okay, look, I think the Democrats own the process and the mechanics.

They've got a great advantage on the early vote, on ballot harvesting, on

telling people how to vote, where to vote, when to vote.

This is the second time you brought this up, so I'm going to mention this.

Trump was always dead set against early voting.

He just did a complete 180 this week.

Now he loves it.

You know why?

I hope he does.

By the way, I hope President Trump and Mrs.

Trump will go and vote early in Florida the first day they're eligible to vote early, because when the lion roars, the others will follow.

His voters will say, oh, well, now President Trump voted early.

I can too.

You're taking a chance.

Grandpa can get out of the bathroom, let alone out of the house on election day.

I want that sucker's vote in October.

So I don't like early voting, but if this is the new normal, you adapt or you die politically.

Okay.

And we have to.

So let's say he wins.

It's at least a 50-50.

Will he relinquish power in 2028?

Yes.

12th, 2029, January 20th, 2029, our birthday.

Right.

It is inauguration.

I'll still be 11 years younger than you on that birthday, but it is our shared race.

Okay.

Who's the comedian here?

Okay.

But so you said that so definitively.

Of course he'll relinquish power.

You know why?

Because he will have done such a great job in his second term that whoever the Republican nominee will win.

And he'll see it as Trump's third term.

That's the way he'll see it.

Well, he has said many times, sometimes in a little comedy that he does, mocking me, because I was always saying you wouldn't lose power.

He went around the country for many months and said, maybe I deserve, because we were cheated out of this one, maybe I should get another one, and maybe one after that.

So that's just a joke?

Ha ha.

Probably, but look,

the Constitution prevents him from

the push, but there's a push.

I know, but a lot of people think that once he wins, that's the last election we'll ever have.

Dude, I've been talking to him, and a lot of undecided voters who don't think very highly of Biden, either because of the age issue or

inflation, that sort of thing, are worried that if Trump gets into office, he'll never leave.

And there are people on the right pushing.

The American Conservative magazine has been.

He hasn't conceded the 2020 election yet.

What do you mean, how?

You make it sound like it's a crazy idea.

He has not conceded the one who didn't leave.

I'll concede it.

I'll concede it because it's very obvious who the president is.

It's very obvious Joe Biden is the president presiding over 20% increases in gas and groceries, presiding over 22% increases in health care, 36% in car insurance.

I mean, people can't afford the natural accoutrements of an adult life, which is why young people have abandoned Biden.

So it's very clear Donald Trump is not the president.

Our economy sucks.

The border is open.

8.8 million people came here.

That's larger than the population of 39 states.

It's insane.

We know who the president is.

We will get to all these issues.

But right now,

I'm just asking you, don't act like we ever had before a candidate running for office who never conceded the prior election.

That has never happened.

Well, I'm sorry, but respectfully, why are we talking about this?

I think people are so nervous.

Why are we talking about whether elections matter in America?

I want to tell you,

but my business, listen, I've been a pollster for decades, a fully recovered attorney and happy about it.

My job is the prism of the people.

People are not talking about that.

Bill, they honestly are talking about bacon and eggs, the insurance, the utilities.

They're trying to meet everyday expenses.

They feel affected by the people.

Well, then they need to be slapped up the head because they're not.

No, no, I'm sorry.

They feel a lack of security, a lack of affordability.

People do care about democracy also.

They do.

Maybe not the circles.

Maybe not the circles you have.

We all do.

You know what I think of January 6th?

I came on your show five days after that.

We know what, nine days after that.

We know what I think of January 6th.

That will never change.

But if we're looking backward, elections are always about the future, not the past.

That's the way America needs to look at them.

And right now, they feel cost of living and everyday quality of life has diminished.

But as a pollster, you've got to worry.

I mean, you've seen polls that say if Donald Trump is convicted of a crime and he's currently on trial, even though it doesn't get much attention in the news, that support for Trump will ebb.

Trump doesn't get attention in the news.

It's all the crime.

No, the criminal trial?

No, it's nothing but protesters this week.

Oh, okay.

So

that criminal trial really, I mean, we're treating it like

it's like the Gwyneth Paltrow skiing trial.

People just don't care.

You all can testify.

Okay.

Yes.

Protestants, there are vulnerabilities there.

Of course, there are.

There's vulnerabilities.

We're a split country.

We have cultural cleavages.

We are politically.

Listen, our elections, our presidential elections are not decided by millions of votes across the country.

They're decided by thousands of votes across a handful of states.

I've read in your thing.

Three states.

Three states in the 1860s.

You think it's going to come down to Michigan, Pennsylvania, and Wisconsin?

I think it probably does.

If you look at 2016, Trump swept those three states, became president.

Biden swept them in 2020.

Except I think anybody, whichever candidate...

Let me throw a wild card at you there.

Florida.

Now, it's absolutely been a red state for a while.

But their abortion law went into effect this week.

Six weeks.

That's pretty draconian.

I'm criticizing that.

What Trump hasn't said he'd vote against?

Well, Trump has said everything about abortion.

When he ran the first time, Chris Matthews said, do you believe in punishment for abortion?

He said yes.

The answer is there has to be some form of punishment for the woman, yes.

Now he says it's all about the states.

Whether he'd sign a federal ban on abortion, there never will be a chance that, he says, because that won't happen.

It's all about the states.

Is he comfortable with states punishing women who have abortions?

I don't have to be comfortable.

The states are going to make that decision.

I get the argument abortion should not be legal.

They think it's murder.

I get that.

I don't get it's okay to murder babies in blue states, but not in red states.

Well, I agree with that, which is why I support a 15-week minimum standard only because, for example, a girl named Ileana here in Southern California was born at 12 ounces, the size of a cocaine, really, and she survived and is thriving, and that's what's going on.

I think we should have a conversation about science when it comes to abortion.

We've talked about politics.

We've talked about religion and morality and gender.

What about the science?

How in the world do you have a law in this state bill and many other states, sadly, where abortion is way past the point of viability?

We should talk about, we should ask, I think we're having a conversation with the wrong party.

I watch a lot of McConnell.

people.

I want to have conversations about the politics of it.

And the fact that Trump won't come out and say, if Congress sends me a federal abortion ban, I will veto it.

The fact that he's dodging it.

There's not going to be a federal abortion ban.

There will be a federal Republican Congress.

There won't.

There will not be a abortion.

And the fact that he won't answer that, I think, is a pretty...

Do you mean 15 weeks, a national minimum abortion?

No, I mean a national abortion ban.

There will be no national minimum banana.

If it comes to Trump,

I would bet money that he would sign it.

And the fact that he won't come out and say so, it makes him sound more like an ordinary politician.

I've never heard Trump kind of stick to talking points like that

over and over again

and just dodge instead of telling the unvulnerable.

I think there is a role for the federal government, and so do Joe Biden and Kamala Harris.

They're saying restore Roe.

So they are saying it's a federal issue.

I think 15 weeks minimum standards means that

if a baby is 15 weeks or so gestation in a state, you can't go much past that unless it's life of the mother, unless there's another circumstance.

That's always in there.

But Trump's been very clear.

There have been six Republican presidents since 1973, Roe versus Wade.

Nixon, Ford, Reagan, Bush, Bush, Trump.

All six roughly had the same position on abortion over 50 years.

I'm pro-life with exceptions for rape, incest, life for the mother.

And now people are talking about gestation limits.

But you know, Bill, if at 15 weeks,

he's literally come out and said, I'm the one who killed Roe versus Wade.

Yes, which is going to be in every commercial, even Kamala Harris, when she does form a sentence, it's usually that one.

So,

This is why I think the Biden folks.

Gloves are off today.

This is why the Biden folks and the Democrats I talk to think that Biden needs to be focused more on abortion, specifically for that reason.

I was talking to a Biden.

Is it not the Democrats' best issue?

I mean, this is the car the Republicans caught.

People don't like it.

Fucking for free.

One of the last things we had in this country.

Well, you didn't have to worry about the, because it's an economic issue a lot.

I was talking to a Biden advisor just this week who said he brought up the old, when Giuliano was running for president, he said, every time he opened his mouth, a noun, a verb, and 9-11.

He said, what we ought to be doing is every time Biden opens his mouth, a noun, a verb, and abortion.

Well,

I hope Biden does that.

Look, you're right, it is their best issue.

I believe abortion is a vote motivator and a turnout intensifier for the Democrats.

There's no question.

But they're going to overplay it because they can't talk about the border or the economy or the two new wars that Biden helped to start or can't do anything about.

eastern part of the world.

I have to take

a break.

He keeps dodging.

I have to take a break here, but then we've got to get back to the wars Biden started.

Cool.

Okay.

But I read an interesting piece in the news this week.

A lot of people are worried about AI and is it taking over our lives?

Well, I think it is because now we have an AI-generated beauty contest.

This is the world's first beauty contest with just AIs.

They are pretty cute.

I've got to give them that.

But you know that part of every beauty contest where the host talks to the contestants about, you know, I used to say, come get out here in a bikini and answer a question about Syria.

Okay.

So

we got a hold of some of the questions that the AI beauty contest is going to, that are going to be answered.

Would you like to hear some of those?

Okay.

Well, I'm sure you're right.

For example,

what is your plan for world peace?

And is it to slaughter all the humanoids?

What are your feelings on humans stealing jobs from self-checkouts?

Well

will you also join OnlyFans when your modeling career goes nowhere?

Have you ever gone to Walmart on a Saturday and thought, how has this species survived?

Other than a power cord, what are your turn-ons?

Can you explain why your answers seem more human than Kamala Harris?

Oh, well, I'll see you later.

Poor Kamala, got a double up, Wendy.

If you could be any other collection of ones and zeros, what would it be?

What do you do when that box on your computer comes up that says, I am not a robot?

Oh.

Is Sidney Sweeney one of you or one of us?

And

what was it like when Donald Trump walked into your dressing room?

Okay.

So.

So you're saying Joe Biden started the war in Ukraine and Joe Biden started the war in Gaza?

You said that.

You said the two wars Biden started.

Yeah, I should have said has done nothing to mitigate, let alone eliminate.

And I would just like to say, forever.

What could any president do?

Oh, I'll tell you, I worked for one, was the first one in 72 years, Donald Trump, to never start a new war.

That's a fact.

And the opposite of the...

Jimmy Carter.

The opposite was true.

Jimmy Carter never fired a shot.

Jimmy Carter.

Well, God bless him.

He's 99 and a peaceful person, and we should all wish him well.

Okay, so I think it was

if we're going back to...

No, Donald Trump did not start a new war.

And you said he was the first one ever.

I couldn't see it.

No, in 72 years.

Well, that would conclude Jimmy Carter.

Okay, Jimmy Carter.

Okay, I'll go for 50 years.

By the way, Joe Biden is, I think that's incorrect, but I'll give it to you.

No, he knows it.

Here's a fact check for you.

Joe Biden doesn't know what he's doing.

A majority of people in every single poll don't believe he's got the acuity, agility, or ability to do the job.

NBC News asked the best polling questions of all because they said, who's more competent?

Donald Trump by double digits.

Who has a plan for the country?

Who would handle a crisis?

Who has the energy for the job?

Everybody's polls, Bill, say the same exact thing.

And I like those polling questions because that's what people ask themselves as they go into the polling place.

Who's going to help me and my family?

And Joe Biden is a gift to Donald Trump in 2024.

If I were a Democrat, I would have gotten rid of Biden and Harris a year and a half ago.

That's true.

Replaced him, probably lose to Donald Trump, but then make him the face of the opposition.

This is not hard to do.

That's true.

Yes, sir.

Well, I'd say the Biden people would probably reciprocate that Trump is the gift to Biden because he's probably the only Republican that Biden could plausibly be.

I mean, the one thing Biden does have

on the issues of war,

which is, you know, he is with the popular position when it comes to Gaza and Israel.

He's been an outspoken support.

What is it?

We've heard so many.

What is it?

It's backing Israel.

It's coming out, criticizing the chaos on campuses, allowing people's right to protest.

Bit of a mixed message.

He's a Scanspire this week.

What's his position?

His position is that you can't be breaking windows and starting all kinds of...

They raped women and put babies in ovens.

I'm talking about breaking windows.

I'm talking about campus.

We're talking about different things.

And

I'm also not here

spinning for Biden.

But on the issue of war in Israel, he is in a solid position, at least when it comes to public opinion.

Well, I work for for the most pro-Israel president in American history.

But look, I think that

he was very critical of Netanyahu.

That's true.

It sounds like Biden is not pro-Israel either.

Well, that's what I'm saying.

Which position is he today?

But look, on the protesters, the White House didn't seem to mind it or matter much or say anything until the optics went against him.

They're worried about the political fallout for Biden instead of the fact that these spoiled brats pretend it's about free speech, it's about free stuff, bring me lotion and vegan food.

They never once said

release the hostages.

They never are making demands that would actually help other people.

Yeah, I'm with you on that, but that's not what we're talking about.

Look,

I am,

this stuff is, I'm so incensed about some of this stuff because, you know, when I read about the college loans,

you know, I mean, I mean, I can't, where's the stat on this?

Oh, Biden administration's student debt cancellation.

will cost to combine $870 billion to $1.4 trillion.

That's a lot of debt forgiveness.

Okay, so colleges constantly raise tuition.

Then the kids take out more loans.

Then the government comes by and pays those loans.

Okay, so my tax dollars are supporting this Jew hating?

No, you hate all the tents.

No, I agree with you completely.

And now people are really upset.

By the way, it was never fair.

You can't have plumbers and pipe fitters paying for the student loans of doctors and lawyers.

It's not fair.

And I'm all for the government trying to help people who need it.

But he did that as a political play, and everybody knows that he's believing it.

And it hasn't worked.

It hasn't worked.

If you look at issues that young people care about, Gaza is like 15th out of 16th and the only thing that comes in lower than Gaza is student loan forgiveness.

So it hasn't worked as a motivator for the youth vote, you know, half of which are out there chanting Genocide Joe.

So it's backfired not just in terms of public policy, but in terms of the politics, too.

Yeah, I mean, Trump is winning the youth vote.

By, I think, 11 points.

According to the CNN poll, yes.

That's pretty astounding to me.

It's a 40-point point.

What do you make of that?

You're closer to the youth.

What I make of that, a lot of it, is if you turn on your TV today, you see young people protesting, angry, fighting with cops.

What you don't see is Donald Trump in a criminal trial.

What you don't see is

one of his blue chip vice presidential candidates murdered a dog a week ago and is two weeks into talking about that story.

All of these stories that could potentially be damaging for Republicans and help Joe Biden have fallen by the wayside because all of the attention is on these protesters and on these fights, on their behavior, and on the fact that a lot of people don't like what they see on the television.

Biden was elected to push aside the chaos and the havoc of the Trump years.

I think everybody can agree on that.

It hasn't happened.

You turn on your TV and you see what's going on on these campuses, it hasn't happened.

And that's one big reason why he's losing the vote, one big reason why he's losing the vote.

Yes, chaos and crisis in the Trump administration in a tweet and a comment here and there.

Now it's chaos and crisis everywhere we look, at the border, on our college campuses.

By the way, in our halls of Congress, 31 Democrats voted against the resolution last October 18th to condemn Hezbollah and Hamas.

And the resolution clearly said, Bill, that they were concerned about institutions of higher education allowing sympathies for Hezbollah and Hamas, which our own government, Biden's government, Trump's government, have declared terrorist groups.

And they specifically said in there it was going to hurt, make uncomfortable, if not worse, Jewish students with all this anti-Semitism.

That was October 18th.

31 Democrats, including the most well-known young ones, the squad that doesn't do squat, for example, all voted against that resolution.

Well, I couldn't agree more.

This is the problem with Biden.

Respectfully, I don't think people care about other things than young people.

When are young people, whether they're single or married, ever going to be able to afford their first home?

Get on with the accoutrements of adult life.

This economy is hurting them.

Actually, it was in the news this week that people under 40 are 49% richer than they were before the pandemic.

They're actually doing better than other generations.

Well, that's good.

But the problem is

Biden moves.

Bunch of Biden Wait, wait, wait.

I just presented a fact.

Can we respond to that?

Because it was in contrast to the bullshit you were saying.

Let me respond to a fact.

Sorry.

Let me get to that point.

I work at a business magazine.

I work at a business magazine.

We get these numbers all day long.

McDonald's on their earning call last quarter said, we're losing customers who make less than $45,000 a year because they can't afford McDonald's anymore.

McDonald's is at the bottom of the food chain.

If you can't afford a happy meal, you're going to be angry.

One of the reasons younger people, low-income people, are angry is because the inflation really does hit, even if the overall wages have risen somewhat since Biden has been president.

It's not enough to make up for the cost of housing, the cost of food, the cost of groceries, the cost of gas.

And that's a fact that a lot of Democrats are ignoring or trying to talk around.

Okay, but the inflation was mostly caused by all that money we gave out during the pandemic, which was bipartisan.

Not necessarily, not necessarily.

Supply chain issues.

There are supply chain issues and COVID.

There's a war between Russia and Ukraine.

It was a perfect storm of all sorts of things that caused inflation.

But just passing out $5 trillion in free money, that wasn't the big part of it?

That was a part of it.

I'm not targeting it.

That's the biggest part.

I think that's the biggest part of it.

I think when you write that kind of checks for money you don't have in the bank, I think that's going to cause inflation.

And it did.

And Trump did it, and Biden did it.

Everybody did it.

It was just where the country was.

It's where our minds are now.

People are hurting.

You just give them money.

I think a lot of this election, though, is about

parties taking for granted their core constituencies.

So I think the Democrats always believe that they've got young people, or they have union households, or they have women, or they have African-Americans, Hispanic Americans.

We don't have to do anything special to mollify them, pass policies that they need.

And this election is really going to test that in many different ways.

Because when you say that in the CNN poll, Donald Trump is beating Joe Biden by 11 points, even though I think Biden won them by 28 or 26 points last time, it's a huge swing.

It's because people don't feel they're beholden to either the political parties or their candidates.

They're going to vote their best interests.

And I will say about Donald Trump now with these court cases, what I said after Access Hollywood, we kvetch and converse and complain about what offends us, but we vote according to what affects us.

Take it to the bank.

It's a huge difference between what we say is on our minds and what bothers us day by day and how we vote for many people because we need to vote according to our interests.

Why wouldn't you vote?

People are voting by amnesia.

When Trump left office,

his approval weighting was the lowest of any president ever.

Now it's somehow magically up to 55 percent.

This happens with every president.

You look at when they leave office, people, oh, I remember that exactly.

It was a few days ago.

Four years later, they have no idea.

I think it's a binary choice between the two.

But it's also May.

And for a lot of people, Trump is still on the back burner.

When I go out to campaign events, I still bump into people who don't believe that Trump and Biden are going to be the nominees in November.

So Americans haven't all focused in on the fact that this is going to be the choice, like it or not.

Most of them don't like that choice.

But come September, come October, when people lock in on the fact that it's going to be Donald Trump again, he's going to bring that chaos and havoc with him, which a lot of voters think he will, that's the best hope.

And we will probably see them in a debate now because

Biden was on Howard Stern this week, and he was asked if we would debate, and he said he would.

Well, yeah, I mean, I think that that applause says a lot.

Like, oh, good.

Yes.

Biden will be debating.

Yeah, that's going to be good for Biden.

No.

I don't, you know, I mean, this is what I hope.

Biden did that.

He started the meter too early, honestly.

He shouldn't have committed to that so early, in my view.

Right.

But I'm glad he did.

I believe in democracy, so we should have debates.

People should be able to access the two candidates side by side, suss it out, and look at them shoulder to shoulder.

But there is absolutely no hard evidence whatsoever anywhere.

Maybe you can produce it.

that Joe Biden can stand at a podium for 90 minutes, let alone without a teleprompter.

If he thinks he can do that, and they're they're so confident that he can debate Donald Trump and he can beat Donald Trump, I hope they will have three debates at least, Bill.

We need that.

The democracy deserves that.

People don't have money to go and pay to meet a candidate or ask some questions.

That's our biggest question for you.

As if anyone learns anything from a debate, it's a problem.

I do.

I learned Biden lied about discussing business with his son.

The laptop is not

a problem.

If only we could catch Trump in a lie sometime.

But that's part of the issue of the debates, though.

the question for me:

is Trump actually going to agree to a debate with Joe Biden, with a mainstream moderator, not Sean Hannity, a real journalist who's going to ask tough questions?

We shut up for every debate.

What do you mean?

It's not going to be about the moderators.

He's been a lot lately.

He did Anderson.

He did not know about Time Magazine.

He did talk to Time Magazine.

That was a start.

But most of the time, he likes to go on friendly TV shows and does like.

Moderators are Anderson Cooper, Martha Radditz.

Chris, the one who left Fox News to go to CNN.

Yeah, it's not about the moderators.

I mean, look, we are all afraid of this.

Let's be honest.

All of us who think a Trump presidency would be a disaster and want Biden to win think that him going into that arena in its 90 minutes?

It's fraught.

It's fraught.

Anyway, we'll be hopeful.

Time for new rules, everybody.

Thank you very much.

Okay.

No,

now that San Francisco's $1.7 million public toilet is finally opened, and it ended up only costing $700,000,

everyone has to admit, California's back, baby.

Exactly.

Take that, Illinois.

What could $700,000 buy your homeless there?

Oh, well.

Yeah, okay.

But then they wouldn't be homeless, would they?

Neural, let's admit that the new hybrid coffee mug bong

is the dumbest product ever made.

It's like combining a vibrator with a reading light.

Why would I mix something I enjoy doing first thing in the morning with coffee?

New rule, the South African tourists who sat quietly in this car while lions fucked on the roof

deserve an award.

Best roommates ever.

Interesting difference between humans and lions.

With lions, it's the male partner who says, ow, you're on my hair.

New rules, now that the Chechnyan Ministry of Culture has banned all music that's either too fast or too slow,

Chechny has to change its name to the People's Republic of Husbands Who Won't Get Up to Dance.

And yes, there's actually a country now where they regulate the speed of music.

Maybe someone at Columbia can get mad about that.

New rules, someone needs to explain to young guys raised on Pornhub that most women don't like being called a dirty whore.

And the ones who do will tell you.

Here's an idea.

Try being nice during sex.

Say things like, wow, this is fun.

You sure aren't good at sex.

Better yet, do what the airlines do and say, I know you have a choice when fucking, so thank you for fucking me.

And finally, new rule at the top levels of our federal government, giving a guy a job because he got screwed over for another job isn't a good reason to give a guy a job, especially if the job is Attorney General, and especially if it's during a time when we need a tough AG to catch a real criminal.

Merrick Garland.

Merrick Garland, who is that Attorney General I speak of and who, spoiler alert, sucks,

was, you may recall, President Obama's pick for the Supreme Court in 2016 after the Clintons murdered Justice Galia with a pillow.

And while our government dysfunction continues to grow, one thing remained sacrosanct.

When a Supreme Court justice dies, the president gets to fill the seat.

Until Mitch McConnell said, fuck that new rule, fuck you.

Garland never even got a hearing.

So, when Biden got elected, the Democrats said, hey, wouldn't it be funny as payback if we gave Garland the Attorney General job?

And that's how we got Attorney General Barney Fife.

A man who epitomizes the strange stupor that comes over Democrats whenever they have to choose a top lawman.

They worry so much about appearing non-partisan, they get behind someone who lets actual crimes go unpunished.

Five years ago in this space, I was tearing Robert Mueller a new one.

Remember him, the straight-arrow Republican all the Democrats thought would hold Trump accountable for colluding with Russia?

But with Mueller, as with Garland now, when we needed a pit bull, we got a purse dog.

It's so interesting, when it comes time for Republicans to appoint a special prosecutor, they always appoint a Republican.

And when it comes time for Democrats to appoint one, they also appoint a Republican.

A Democrat hasn't served as a special prosecutor in a major investigation since Watergate.

Somehow the rule became it has to be a Republican or it's not fair.

You know, a Dudley Dewright type, like Mueller or James Comey.

Remember him?

A Boy Scout, they said.

Yeah, he was a Boy Scout, all right.

He gave me a knot in the stomach.

because he threw the presidency to Trump by making a big announcement 11 days before the election that he was reopening the case into Hillary's emails and then found nothing.

But the FBI was also investigating the Trump campaign's constant contacts with Russian nationals at the same time, over 140 of them, but that he kept secret.

Weird, huh?

Trump whines he's the victim of selective prosecution.

The truth is he's the beneficiary of selective non-prosecution.

Take the case that's going on in New York right now.

We call it a hush money trial, but really it's an election interference case.

And Trump is clearly complicit in breaking the same laws that Michael Cohen pled guilty to and served prison time for.

So tell me, How can the fixer who delivers the hush money be guilty of election interference, but the candidate who orders it, pays it, conceals it, and benefits from it not be.

Charles Manson didn't personally go on the killing spree, but he went to prison for it.

El Chapo didn't have the drugs in his ass.

Michael Corleone had somebody else shoot Mo Green.

I'm just saying the problem.

The problem.

The problem with this case isn't that Trump isn't guilty, it's that it's being tried in the wrong court.

If Garland had done his job, Trump would be in federal court charged with breaking campaign finance laws instead of state court charged with falsifying business records.

And then there's the case of the stolen files in Trump's bathroom, Cropper's delight.

Four months after Trump left office, the National Archives began asking him to return the documents he illegally took with him, and after being ignored for nine months, they passed the case off to Garland, who should have sent the FBI to Mar-a-Lago the next day, but didn't for another six months.

Joe Biden also had documents at his private residence.

But again, by bending over backwards to be fair to the Republican, the Democrat got fucked.

Garland chose a, again with this, Trump appointed Republican as special counsel for Joe Biden, as he did later for Hunter Biden.

And the upshot in the files cases was to make it look like Biden and Trump were equally guilty, which was not true.

Biden returned the documents immediately and cooperated fully.

So why the need to appoint a special counsel at all?

Oh yes, optics.

But of course the optics wound up being that while Biden was totally exonerated, the Republican counsel took the opportunity to say that the reason Biden wasn't guilty was that he was too much of a senile, feeble, confused, shell of a former man who poops his pants and can't remember his kids' names.

With Biden, Garland appointed a special prosecutor instantly.

With Trump, it took 20 months.

20 months.

I know liberals love drag, but maybe don't do it with the justice system.

And now, with the most serious of the Trump trials, the one involving his illegal schemes to remain in office, it's happening again.

59% of Americans, including 26% of Republicans, say they want a verdict on this case before the election.

But it's doubtful they'll get one.

Because for nearly two years, our slow jam attorney geniel

looked at the statue of Lady Justice and thought, I want to be like her, incapable of moving.

Merrick Garland is just so slow.

He's like if the 405 was a person.

He's the embodiment of the liberal judge in every 70s cop movie, the one who always lets the psychopath out on a technicality.

And then the psychopath rapes a nursing school and Clinton Eastwood has to kill him with a bazooka.

But at least the optics were good.

All right, that's our show.

I'll be at the Palace Theater in Albany, New York, May 19th, the Spotlight 29 Casino in Coachella, June 1st.

I'm the David Copperfield Theater at the MGM Grand New Vegas, June 21st and 22nd.

I want to thank Josh Green, Cody Ann Conway, and Roger Galfree.

Now go watch Overtime on YouTube.

Thank you very much, folks.

Catch all new episodes of Real Time with Bill Maher every Friday night at 10, or watch him anytime on HBO On Demand.

For more information, log on to HBO.com.

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