Ep. #610: John Waters, Rob Reiner, Sen. Amy Klobuchar

Welcome to an HBO podcast from the HBO late night series, Real Time with Bill Ma.

Thank you, Bill.

Thank you very much.

Thank you.

Thank you very much.

I appreciate you coming.

You sound great.

Thank you.

I know.

Thank you very much.

I know

why you're happy tonight because your bullshit liberal arts degrees are getting paid off.

Isn't that great?

Yes.

President Biden made it official.

He's going to pay off for giving over $300 billion

in college debt.

And today he was voted the sexiest man alive on SugarDaddies.com.

No, the kids were

giving up on him.

Now they love him.

I was on Melrose Boulevard today.

Oh my God, everybody's wearing aviator glasses and

they're all getting no malarkey tattoos.

It's amazing.

Kids.

Ah, the kids.

They always say they want fresh and new and they go back to vintage.

Speaking of that, boy, did you see what happened in this city of Cassville, Missouri?

They're going back to spanking.

There you go.

You can applaud that.

You don't have to be afraid of that.

But it's not working.

Not with Gen Z.

uh today the principal was spanking some girl and she said that was hot but i'm more into choking

yeah

oh and just just in time for back to school uh they did fire the chief of the police there at the school in Uvalde Texas three months later

he he went in for his performance review and they said wait in the hall.

He said, way ahead of you.

And of course, our big scandal here in America goes on Boxgate

about Mar-a-Lago and the boxes Trump took today.

They unsealed the affidavit that allowed this raid to take place.

And of course, most of it's redacted, but still the Republicans are always on this page of they raided the former president's home.

Yes, because that's where he put the shit he stole.

It's like saying to a cop, you pulled over my car.

Yes, because that's what you were speeding in.

So, but Trump, apart from being apologetic, he's mad at his lawyers.

He's gone through every lawyer in the country now.

Now he's got the accidente guy, you know.

And he's telling,

he wants them back.

He said, they're mine.

What, what, when they open up his brain, I mean,

that's the rules in his head.

If I've ever touched it with my hands, it's mine forever.

If I touch it with my dick, I was never there.

Am I wrong?

Nothing.

And

in the why can't we have these kind of scandals category, you see the stag in Finland keeps going on there.

Their 36-year-old prime minister, Sana Marin, you know, she was in trouble last week because why?

They caught her, there was the Instagram of her dancing.

What is it, foot loose?

Who gives a fuck?

She was dancing.

So then there was also a photo that came out from the party of two women topless, there it is, kissing.

This is a scandal?

Scandal.

It's a travel poster.

But, okay.

So, because we live in the age of the apology, Prime Minister Marin had to apologize this week for that.

She made a statement.

She said, look, about the women,

we had a sauna, we swam, we spent time together, but that kind of picture should never have been taken.

Bill Maher, Associated Press.

When you were in the sauna, how many other attractive, fit, Finnish women were in there?

And what was ultimately decided about the border dispute with Russia?

And finally, congratulations to Nick Cannon, because he announced this week he's just had his eighth child.

There's a ninth coming in October he announced this week and then next year a tenth is coming did I say congratulations I meant put on a fucking condom

all right we got a great show we have Senator Andy Klobuchar and Rob Reiner but first up

he is a filmmaker writer and author of the new novel Liarmouth a feel-bad romance John Waters

John Waters, how are you, sir?

I'm well.

How you doing?

Great to see you at your undisclosed location.

You're a very

subdued.

There, you look fantastic.

Thank you so much.

I wonder what it would be like.

You're such an icon at this point.

What it would be like if you and I walked down Santa Monica Boulevard, you know, in Boys Town?

Well, it depends which block, you know, because it used to be.

It used to be on Santa Monica Boulevard that they had different blocks.

Out front of Oakie Dog was the killer hustlers.

Then you went another block, it was straight hustlers, then bisexual, then gay, then drag, and then trans.

So you know, it's hard, there's a lot of red lights on Santa Monica.

So I didn't pick them up, but

it was nice to watch.

You know, I guess I wasn't looking for all that information, but.

So I'll stand on whatever one you pick.

No,

I'm just saying, when you walk through a neighborhood like that, I mean, you just must be mobbed like the Beatles in 1964.

Well, people are lovely to me everywhere.

I get the same reaction in a biker bar or in jail when I visit people.

The guards ask me for autographs.

Right.

You know, if I'm on the subway, I get recognized for the Chuck Pe movie.

It all depends which thing I'm doing, you know.

So I like to go everywhere.

But you're right.

I mean, I am getting so respectable you want to puke.

Well,

are you offended by that being respectable?

I mean, I think you might be.

I see you're getting a star.

You're getting a star on the walk of fame.

Okay.

And I know.

And I'm really honored.

You have one too on Vine, right?

What's that?

You have one too on Vine?

Oh, anyone can fucking buy one.

No, but no, you have to.

No, you have to.

Anyway,

but my thing is, you don't get to pick, but when it was announced I had one, someone quipped online.

finally, closer to the gutter than ever.

And I know you don't get to pick where yours is, but kind of I wish mine was in front of Larry Edmonds' bookshop, you know, or the best on Las Palmas.

That's where that great newsstand used to be.

That's where that church was, where all the hustlers stood.

And that's where Divine showed up on a garbage truck to the premiere female trouble in that theater.

Wow.

Well, I know you're also getting an exhibit at the Motion Picture Academy Museum.

You're right.

You can't get much more respectable than museums and Walk of Fame.

What is in the exhibit there?

When they go to the John Waters exhibit, what would they see?

Just think, Divine's identification birth certificate is going to be in the same building as Dorothy's Ruby Slippers.

That's going to be great.

But what I would like to get, and I'm still trying, they've been gathering stuff for two years on this, is to get Divine's Cheater.

That's the fake vulva pubic hair.

And a friend of mine had it, and he died, and the family sold it, and then someone called me and told me they had it and tried to kind of hold it hostage that I would pay for it.

So I'm hoping that if they hear this, give Divine's Cheater to the Academy exhibition.

Well.

Someone should run as a one-issue candidate on that issue alone.

But what about Pink Flamingos?

Isn't that like, there must be something from there in there?

Because that's like a lot of people.

Oh, yeah, there's some other stuff then.

Isn't that the 50th anniversary this year of when...

Yes.

That's amazing.

It just got picked by the National Registry.

Our government picked it as a great American film, which is really insane and wonderful.

But Criterion released it, and I even, we went back and did extras.

I went into the house where

one of the characters lived, and they hadn't seen the movie, and we filmed it and I said, can I lick the banister like Divine did in the movie?

And they said, yes, you can.

And so I put Divine's curse back in the house 50 years later.

It was exciting.

Could you even pitch that story today?

If you were going to a movie studio and saying you wanted to make that movie, would they even listen?

They do listen.

Because you know, Bill, of all the political correctness, I make fun of myself and the rules that I live in.

I haven't been canceled.

My new book, we sent it to the sensitivity editor.

She wouldn't call us back.

I think she died.

We don't know what happened.

But, yes.

Right, it is.

But I haven't been.

I haven't been canceled.

It's right, because you're such an OG, it's baked into the cake.

They'd be disappointed if you weren't.

You know, I mean, you're...

Yeah, but I don't think I'm mean-spirited.

And

I think I make fun of even political correctness myself.

Like in my new book, I have people that are addicted to trampolining, but then there's people that are against them called bounces

that fear you know

and so I'm going to try to imagine everything every possible thing that could happen in this book I have a dog that has had so many facelifts he they think they're a cat with the name surprise with a Z

Right.

And did you did you know face facelifts for pets are coming?

Do you know after you have your dog neutered you can buy this thing called nudicles where you put them on so people don't think you were a butcher?

They're fake testicles for your dog.

I'm not making it up.

So then I think, well, I'm not even pro-life for dogs, really.

And then I thought, well, can dogs get abortions?

I don't know.

I just got a doctorate recently for giving the commencement at the School of Visual Arts.

I'm a doctor now.

So I'm thinking maybe I'm going to go into late-term dog abortions.

That might be my fear.

You're right.

You haven't been canceled because it would have happened by now.

No, but also I think the point you're kind of getting to that I would like to get to is that you're not just a provocateur.

I mean, this novel makes a lot of great commentary on society and some of your movies.

I mean, people forget, you didn't make just make pick for me.

You made mainstream movies.

You worked with Johnny Depp.

Yeah, I worked with you.

It doesn't get much more mainstream.

By the way, what did you think of that trial?

That seems like it had a lot of fun.

Oh no, I'm not going to do that.

I wish they'd go back together and make everybody crazy.

But

it seems to have everything a John Waters movie would have.

Sex, violence, shit in the bed.

Yeah, but my shit and when we mailed someone a turd that was joyous

touche John

and and turd turd terrorism is it happens you know can I say the most radical thing and then

anything I could say rather than me saying I'm Antifa or a proud boy or anything I love Joe Biden I really do you know why

He has a great hair transplant.

He's had drugs in his family.

He can identify with what a lot of American families are going through.

He's a Catholic for abortion and gay marriage.

And so, what if he's seeing now?

Maybe we'll send us all $500,000.

I hope so.

And you're about the same age.

Can I make a suggestion?

Yeah.

I know this looks like I have bad dreads on.

You should play him on Saturday Night Live.

Well,

I would.

They haven't asked me yet.

So you never know.

You can never have too many careers, Bill.

And

Monkey Pox sounds to me like the title of a John Waters movie.

Well,

I call it monkey balls.

You know, that's the worst.

You get big goiters on your balls.

That's a nice look for summer.

And then I hear you can get it in your ass, so you're going to have monkey hole.

Oh, great, great.

Wait till straight people get fat.

They'll have a vaccine.

So you must.

You must feel awfully proud that drag queen story hour is a thing.

When you first put out movies about drag queens, I mean, I was a teenager.

I didn't know what they were, and I learned it from you.

And now kids are learning it.

Yeah, I know.

Like Little Miss Hot Miss.

She goes to school and teaches children about drag.

are you really surprised that some people get upset about that i mean little billy comes home from school and dad said so how was school today said fine little miss hot mess taught me how to put on bottom lashes get it girl

don't be so surprised someone's gonna be upset

All right, John, great good luck with the book.

I know it contains a straight man who has a talking gay penis.

If you're gonna get one book this year about a straight man who has a talking gay penis, get John Waters' book.

Thank you, John.

All right, let's lead our panel.

Hey.

What?

You've got to give it to John Waters.

I'm giving it to him.

The commitment to that mustache for 50 years.

The only man who could pull that off.

All right, let me introduce you first, an actor and filmmaker who's directed and started pretty much all of your favorite movies.

Rob Reiner is over here.

And she's the senior Democratic senator from Minnesota.

Mild job.

Amy Klobuchar is here.

Okay, so

you two died in the Will Democrats.

You must be very happy these days because a couple of months ago, it looked like the Democrats were dead in the water.

And now, I mean, Biden's up like six points just in a couple of weeks.

I feel like because Trump's coming back, because abortion's a big issue, people really want their abortion rights, and mostly because Democrats are finally getting things done.

And you're like a, you're a getting things done, Democrat.

You're not a drag queen story hour, Democrat.

And am I right?

This is really why they're up.

I mean, just

this, in this Build Back Better, or whatever they're calling it now, inflation reduction bill, whatever it is.

Medicare, being able to negotiate with the drug companies for drug prices, for Medicare.

This is something they've wanted for a long time and now it happened.

Now, Obama wanted it.

He couldn't get it done.

Trump even wanted it.

Why did it happen now?

I've been leading this bill for a long time, Bill, and I believe what went wrong was that the pharma companies thought they owned Washington.

They literally have three lobbyists for every member of Congress.

And finally, the people said we've had it.

This was our moment with the Inflation Reduction Act.

And we took this provision that they had built into the law 20 years ago that says, you can't negotiate cheaper prices for Medicare.

It's locked in.

The pharma companies literally locked in their profits.

And we said, that's it.

We're going to take that out of there, and we're going to start negotiating for better prices.

Isn't this like the most popular program ever?

88%.

But yet, 88%.

And they still couldn't.

Listen, the Democrats have been on the right side of virtually every issue for many, many years.

And this, we are happy.

We are feeling good because if you look at, this is empirical.

If you look at the first two years of Biden's presidency, there are more accomplishments than any president in the last 60.

And you can look back to LBJ to say, okay, maybe there was as much there.

But Biden has done a lot.

And so we are feeling good.

For the first time, we're seeing the possibility.

I believe we're going to not only hold the Senate, I think we're going to pick up two to four seats in the Senate.

And for the first time, I feel we have a shot to hold on to the House.

And if we do that,

then we've saved democracy.

Let me ask you one question more about the drug thing.

You do?

The drug companies.

Because, again, Obama wanted it, and Trump said, why don't we do it?

Why?

Because of the drug companies.

You didn't do anything.

Okay.

Prices started going up.

The drug companies.

Bad guys because they were blocking this all the years.

Then we saw that movie Dope Sick, and we learned all about the opioid scandal.

I mean, hundreds of thousands of people were killed, and they knew what was going on.

So drug companies, bad guys there, too, right?

But somehow, when it comes to whatever they want to do with COVID, only have our best interests at heart.

How do you explain that?

I think there's an imbalance of power in Washington.

I think we need to have campaign finance laws, and we need to pass a constitutional amendment to overturn Citizens United.

The money that went in every single day in Washington, even to the day where we voted 36 hours to pass the Inflation Reduction Act, to bring down finally the prices of prescription drugs, to do something about climate change for the first time, pharma ran ads until the very last hour.

They take it on and people give in.

They give in.

And we can't have people in Washington, as Rob just pointed out, a bunch of the Republicans that have been giving in to them.

We've got to elect people that will take them on.

Very good, filibuster.

I'm just saying.

Every word she said is true.

Of course, it wasn't the question I asked, but it was a no, of course not.

Who's supposed to get pants?

I'm just saying, if you're like, drug companies are bad guys, drug companies are bad guys, and then, but do everything they say when it comes to this one.

Well, they have done some good things.

They have done some good things except for that.

If you give too much power and you have too much consolidation, just remember,

they're in the business of selling drugs.

They're not in the business of making you healthy, although that is sometimes a side effect.

Anyway, let's move on to.

A wanted side effect.

Sometimes.

Let's move on to the other big thing that the administration did.

Now, college loans.

It's interesting.

I know.

There's people who have college loans.

There are other people in America, the vast majority of Americans, didn't go to college, and they don't have college loans.

So they're a little pissed about this.

They're like, you know, there are plumbers out there saying, well, why don't you pay off my truck

instead?

Because that's what my money went to, my life went to.

It's amazing to me when I read in the paper today how many Democrats are divided about this.

They're not completely behind this idea that Joe Biden is paying off people's student loans.

So where are you on that one?

I think you know during the presidential, I was the one that said rich kids, we shouldn't be paying for their college.

You just can't staple a diploma for free under everyone's chair.

Part of that is I think we need to focus on apprenticeships and filling the hard-to-fill jobs.

That being said, Bill, this is more targeted than a bunch of the proposals that were out there.

And 87% of the money goes to people that are making less than $75,000 a year.

You've got...

It will help nurses.

It helps nurses.

It helps teachers.

It helps electricians.

A bunch of people have community college loans.

That being said, if I could wave a magic wand and do what I want to do, I would have actually tied it to the hard-to-fill jobs.

We have 10 million job openings right now in our country.

Two million of them are in health care assisted living.

So if people will go into those jobs instead of being like hedge fund managers,

then we could actually put the loan repayment help and have it connected to people going into the jobs that we need to fill.

I think that would be a way you can do it.

But I do think it's important for people to understand that this is a targeted program that he put out.

50 years ago, 70% of good jobs required a high school diploma.

Now, they say 70% require a college degree.

So I know this is like supposed to address income inequality, but it kind of does the reverse because it's the people who have college degrees.

Yeah, but there are also parents of those kids who don't have college degrees who want their kids to be able to go to college so that they can have a better life than they did.

And we have to address the cost of going to college.

I mean, I'm an old man, but when I went to college, you know, at UCLA,

it cost me $242 to go to school for a whole year.

Now it's crazy how much you have to pay, and it's unfortunate.

And it does target the kids that are most, you know, most in need.

But I keep saying on this show, no one's listening, but I keep saying...

Well, it's your show.

I know.

No, no,

I'm just saying nobody, you know,

eventually they follow my lead, but takes years.

A decade.

It takes years for someone else to claim it.

Anyway, but I keep saying it's not about affordability.

Yes, college is unaffordable.

It's about making college more unnecessary.

It's a giant scam.

It's a consumer product that they're selling you

as a golden ticket.

to be in the upper middle class.

But they're not really getting any education.

Did you go to college?

Of course.

Of course.

Because that's the best.

And look at the job you have.

You're a big-time guy and have your own show.

Would you have your own show with that?

Maybe you would, I don't know.

Yes, I would.

Exactly.

Yeah, yeah, no, I.

No, I mean, actually, I mean.

Yeah, but you wouldn't qualify for the loan repayment.

Income.

Yeah.

I'm just saying, most jobs they do not really require.

It's a scam.

And you talked about nurses.

I've talked to so many nurses.

My mother was a nurse.

I still know many nurses that were friends.

Okay,

administrators, teachers, they all have this complaint that at a certain point they need more education to like advance in their career, when really they know exactly what they're doing.

They don't.

It's just a way to make you go back to school.

And I feel like

Education is to Democrats what tax cuts are to Republicans.

They think it solves everything.

Well, it's not just upper education.

You're also talking about K through 12.

And that's something that Democrats have cared about forever.

And you see Republicans moving away from public education.

That, to me, is where the big money should be going.

And yes, there are people who should go to college.

If you want to be a doctor, you want to be a lawyer, you want to do something that, you know, you want to be in the space industry, you have to go to college.

There are other jobs that you don't need college for.

I think you and I have shared this view.

We're not going to have a shortage of sports marketing degrees here.

We're going to have a shortage of plumbers, electricians.

We have a shortage of nurses, technology workers.

And some of those jobs require high education.

Some of them require apprenticeships.

And we just got to meet people where they are.

And that's why I'd like to tie it to the jobs that we need to fill.

See, that's...

Yeah.

No, I know.

I like it the way you always come back to like the practical part of it.

Well, she's a problem solver.

I am a problem.

And she's a great great one.

Right.

She's a great one.

That's why, you know, I mean, you were here during the last election season and you were running for president.

I said publicly was happy to do it, that I thought you'd be very good in that position.

But it didn't

work out.

But I've never known anyone who ran for president once and then just went, oh, you know what?

I did it once.

It didn't work out.

But never mind.

It seems like I'll either run for president or die, whichever comes first.

I mean,

look at Biden.

He first ran in 1988, and it didn't happen until 2020.

I guess I'm asking what you're going to do next year.

Look, I am focused right now.

Oh, no, give me that answer.

No, not just.

You spent a whole day yesterday at the Minnesota State Fair.

What I think we need right now is to look at what's in front of us.

And Rob knows this.

It's the midterm elections.

You just have a Republican Party that has gone so extreme on abortion when, in fact, the Democrats are standing up for this simple idea that it's the freedom that women have, that women deserve to have the freedom to choose what they want to do with their own bodies.

And they don't want to have Ted Cruz in the waiting room standing out there.

They don't want politicians.

There are so many differences coming up right in the midterms.

This election is right around the corner.

And so that's why it's so important if we want to do something about the freedom to make your own health care decisions, the freedom to vote, if you want to keep in place this economic recovery.

I firmly believe this.

And Amy,

Senator has a real point because you can't look past, don't laugh at me.

I'm making the pulley figure.

I'm not laughing at you.

You're laughing around me.

I'm laughing near you.

Near me, yeah.

In the area of.

He believes that I've circled the question.

Yeah, no.

No, but no, but the point is, the midterms are critical.

These are the most important midterms you hear this all the time yeah the most important elect these really are because they are it's not just no it's true uh you know women's right to choose democracy whether or not we have a democracy is on the ballot so you can't ask her

right you can't ask her if she's going to run for president we've got we've got to save the democracy you can ask

but she's got to focus on saving the democracy right now but who else they got joe biden has said he is running for president and i've said i'm supporting him that's That's what's happening.

But you know, that's not really the popular position within the party.

As much as he has done well,

he's done more than well.

It's really important to stress this.

No, no, I'm serious because the numbers don't really reflect it.

If you look at his accomplishments,

it's off the charts.

And if he decides he wants to run and he's saying he's going to run, and he's fit, and he's, you know, he's

the ability, then you've got to support that.

He said the kids are getting no more larking tattoos.

I mean, come on.

All right.

So anyway.

Okay.

Primary season is my favorite political season.

Some people like the holidays, Halloween, whatever.

I love primary because it's like the early rounds of American Idol.

You know, it's any...

Any loon can run.

And we have seen a lot of them.

Dr.

Oz,

I must point out.

I must say, I don't know.

I never watched Dr.

Oz's medical show.

So I don't don't know what, I'm not going to pass judge what he is as a doctor.

I bet he's less crazy as a doctor than people assume, because I don't agree with most people's views on medicine.

Okay.

But as a politician, he's a moron because he wants...

Well, he is.

He's so, I think, first of all, I think Dr.

Roz just likes money too much.

He has cut like 11 houses.

He doesn't really live in Pennsylvania where he's running.

And he went to the market to make an ad, and I didn't even heard this word, crude.

Yeah, I guess it's a vegetable platter, but he called it cru de té twice in a campaign ad.

Yeah.

Okay, you're done when you do shit like that.

So we we got some of the hold of some of his other campaign posters.

Would you like to see them?

Because I mean,

he is out of touch.

He, I must say, he is a little out of touch.

Look at this one.

I never met a man I didn't tip.

Then that's just

putting Pennsylvanians back to whatever it is you people do.

Hot cuisine is here again.

That's not...

That doesn't...

Dill baby dill.

That's not...

I'm with Hermes.

Hey, I said no eye contact.

Oscar de la Renta is too damn high.

Not the ring.

That one killed me.

And Dr.

Eisenhower, if I didn't love Pennsylvania, would I pretend to live here?

All right.

So, Rob, I know you're itching to talk about the Trump

box gate.

Oh, wow.

Which, again, there was news today

that they did release the affidavit.

It's It's redacted, so we don't know much, but basically we know what happened.

I mean what I said happened, and I know people who are close to Trump who said, you have no idea how right you are, when I said he had no idea what's in the boxes, he just thinks it's mine.

He doesn't care.

He doesn't read.

He never saw what's in the boxes the first time.

But there is stuff in there.

I mean, when they say

When they say classified, it could be anything.

Lots of stuff is classified that is not classified.

But they've identified these

classified things as there are 184 of them, and they've identified what they think is in those classified documents.

And you just have to understand this.

People have to, prima faco, on its face, the man broke the law.

Yes.

You can't take documents from the White House to your personal

house.

No.

That's breaking the law.

That's breaking the law.

So we know he broke the law.

The question is, how badly did he break the law?

And

he's going to get indicted for this.

There's no question about it.

Some perspective on this.

When we have these classified documents that we look at, top secret documents, I can't even wear a Fitbit.

We go in this super duper silent room way at the bottom of the Capitol called the SCIF, and we look at the documents.

And this guy, we now know, 184 classified documents, 25 of them top secret.

And by the way, countries that want to do us harm want to see these documents.

Human intelligence is what they just are reporting today.

That means that these people could have a target on their backs for KGB hit squads, you name it, going after them.

And so he literally put them in a place where they rent out golf carts, bad mitten sets, and croquet sets.

And that's what he did with the nation's top secrets.

And that's why this is such a serious breach.

He's not going to get past this one.

He can't get past this one.

He can't get past this one?

No.

You know how many times I've heard that on MSNBC?

We got him now.

No, no.

You know what you've heard?

No.

Here's what you've heard.

Here's what you've heard.

You've heard that he was dead during the Mueller investigation.

Well, Mueller had an OLC memo that didn't allow him to prosecute, even though he laid out five examples of obstruction of justice.

He was impeached twice, but that's a political arena.

That's not the legal arena.

You can say whatever you want in the world of politics, but in a court of law, you have to tell the truth.

And Merrick Garland knows that this man broke the law and he's being very...

So what's going to happen?

He's going to be indicted?

He'll be indicted.

Now, will he?

That would take a grand jury,

which may have Trump people on it, right?

Maybe.

So that still, we're in the, even when we're in the justice arena, we're in the political arena.

Indicted.

Yeah, indicted.

You will get indicted from a...

It doesn't have to go to a grand jury.

It probably will.

But he will be indicted.

He will be indicted.

Now, will he go to jail?

I don't know.

Probably not.

He'll probably cut some kind of a deal, and

he'll be not allowed to run for president again.

I don't know what he'll do, but there's no getting past this.

I mean, you can make the big ticket is January 6th.

I mean, the guy, you know,

led an armed insurrection to overthrow the government.

That's being prosecuted.

Well, he incited one.

He wanted to lead it, but they wouldn't let him go.

Right.

Let me ask you more.

That's fair.

Let me ask you a more nuanced question about this.

Is it okay to have a conspiracy to get rid of Trump?

This came up this week because my friend Sam Harris was on a podcast, and he said, here's...

What do you mean a conspiracy to get rid of Trump?

I'm going to tell you.

Okay, thank you.

He was talking about Biden.

I'm going to defer to my lawyer here.

Truer than you know.

They were talking about Hunter Biden's laptop, which was a story, and now all the mainstream press has finally admitted it was a real story.

It was a real laptop with, now look, let's not pussyfoot around this.

He was selling the influence of his father, Joe Biden.

I mean, most political sons do.

Let's not pretend that at least wasn't going on.

I mean, the guy, some guy from China gave him after a a dinner an $80,000 diamond after dinner, as one does.

Yeah.

You know.

If you're Naomi Campbell, but it doesn't usually happen.

Okay.

So Hunter Biden's laptop was buried by the press.

Even the head of Twitter, Jack Dorsey, said that was a mistake.

They buried this story because they remembered what happened with James Comey and the letter 11 days before the 2016 election.

Comey said, we've got to reopen this email investigation with Hillary Clinton and it probably was the last, I mean she ran a horrible campaign, didn't go to Wisconsin, we know all that, but this was probably the last thing that sunk her.

So Sam Harris says it was appropriate

for Twitter and the heads of big tech and the heads of journalistic organizations to feel that they were in the presence of something that is a once-in-a-lifetime moral emergency, meaning Trump.

So he's saying it's okay to have a conspiracy to get rid of somebody as bad as Trump.

It's a little bit of a thorny question because once you go down this road, this is sort of where we are in this country.

The other side is so evil, anything is justified in preventing them from taking office.

Is it?

No, no.

You know what's not justified?

Using armed violence.

to try to kill people in the capital.

That's not justified.

Answer this question.

Answer this question.

What is it?

Was it appropriate?

The question is, was it appropriate to bury the Hunter Biden story?

You're talking about the press doing that?

He's saying that's what they did, and that is what they did.

They buried the Hunter Biden story before the election because they were like, we can't risk having the election thrown to Trump.

We'll tell them after the election.

And we know for a fact that that's what they did?

Of course, you know what I mean?

No, but I'm saying you know for a fact that that's what they did.

I don't know what they did.

I know, because you only watch MSNBC.

No, that's not true.

That's not true.

Well, then you you would know about this.

I do know about that.

Well, you're acting like

I do know about that, and I do watch Fox.

But the point is,

we're going to prove now that

the press play, you know, tried to...

They're admitting it.

The press is admitting it.

Yes, that's not even an issue anymore.

They're saying, yes, we basically did this because we didn't want this to throw the election.

Yes?

I don't know that they've all said this, and

I believe so.

Well, the New York Times definitely did.

My dad was a reporter.

I believe in it.

And I think

you have to make sure that you're treating people fairly.

But I think Rob's point here is that we are dealing with a man who used to be the president right now, who literally tried to lead an armed insurrection.

And that's why we're so focused on this right now.

And I have not been, as you've noticed, as bombastic as my friend here about

what's going to happen,

about what's going to happen coming out of the what we just got out of what they just got out of Mar-a-Lago.

I don't know.

And just as I don't know what's going to happen in these cases, I believe you've got to let the Justice Department do their jobs.

And that is why I have been so shocked that our Republican colleagues who used to, I think they used to always be on the side of national security and support the FBI.

And that's not happening right now.

So just from a political standpoint, I'm glad that we are standing up for national security.

Okay.

So

the other big thing that's going to provide wind at the back of the Democratic sails is this abortion issue.

I mean, the Supreme Court did you politically a big favor because for a while people were, oh, I don't know, is this really going to get people out to the polls?

We have enough evidence now with these special elections and the polling.

We see.

And you know who really is up in arms about this that we didn't think was going to be?

Dads.

Now here's my theory.

American parents spoiled their kids so rotten that they created this cadre of monster children and

people don't want them.

So the idea that you raise.

I think you're wrong.

There's something bill.

I do too.

I think you're wrong there.

I do too.

The fact that they that

you take away my abortion rights?

No, I do not want children.

I do not want them around me.

I mean, I felt like this always.

But now, But now America does.

Okay.

Just a little different take on it.

I just see it more simply.

That basically the women of America and the men who stand with them don't believe that politicians should be telling them what to do with their bodies.

That's what this is.

And that we don't want to have a patchwork of laws so that a 10-year-old girl who is raped in Ohio has to be taken to another state to get an abortion.

That happened.

So when those people in Kansas, you know, there used to be that book, What's the Matter with Kansas?

Now my answer is nothing.

Nothing's the matter with Kansas.

Because they turned out more people voted on the side of reproductive freedom than voted at all in the last Kansas midterm.

And they voted that way because they wanted to stand up for freedom.

And you've got the fact that we don't want a patchwork of laws across this country.

So women in Minnesota have different rights than women in Texas, or women in North Dakota have different rights than women in Florida.

So this is a huge issue.

And you and I discussed it when I was on the show last October.

No, no, I'm not.

And you kind of didn't agree with me.

No, I mean,

I think it is freedom to make your decisions.

I'm certainly pro-choice.

Yeah, I know you.

What I'm saying, I'm more pro-choice than you could imagine.

I don't think life is always precious.

Most people don't think that.

What I'm saying is you shouldn't say to the other side, you people hate women.

They don't hate women.

They just think it's murder.

And if you think it's murder, then you can't go, well, except for people with a vagina, they can commit murder.

I don't think it's murder, but they legitimately do.

And it insults them.

And who are they?

Who are they?

Pro-life people.

There are pro-life people that have the view that that's fine.

They just don't think that they should put their views on someone else.

Right.

And so that's...

But you wouldn't say that about a murderer.

I know, but I think that's what their point is.

I know people in my own state.

That's their personal view, but they think.

And that's fine.

They just don't believe, and that's why they're voting this way.

I am.

And why we just want to say that.

And it's not because they hate women.

No, no, but they have an agenda, and it's a Christian nationalist agenda that has been being pushed and has been pushed for a long time.

Not everyone who's pro-life is a Christian nationalist.

No, no, no, no.

I'm not saying that.

I'm not saying everybody was pro-life.

I'm saying the people who think it's murder and there should be no exceptions for that, that's a very small group of people.

That's not the vast majority of people in this country.

No, it's not.

The Republicans, it's a sizable minority.

Yes, but it's a minority.

The bills that are passing right now, as the Republican governors run to the State House to see who can enact the strictest law, many of them have no exceptions for incest or for rape, and they basically are banned.

If you have an epic pregnancy,

you can't abort it.

The mother could die.

I mean, it's all.

I'm there with you.

Here's the thing.

Here's the thing.

The Republicans are like, that's the dog that caught the car.

I mean,

they wanted this.

They wanted to get rid of Bro V.

Winn.

Now it's like you see certain candidates running away from it or saying, I never said that.

I never said that.

Because they know they're going to lose with this.

This is a losing thing for them.

But that is why.

That's why we need

that's why you need to win the Senate.

You know how that filibuster works?

If we pick pick up just a few more votes,

right?

And we've got Fetterman, who's great in Pennsylvania, the opponent being Dr.

Oz.

But he should eat a little more crudite.

Okay, we've got, we've got, you know what that is about?

Voters do not want candidates that are out of touch, but they also don't want to have candidates that live out of their state.

And Dr.

Oz has the virtue of being both.

Okay, so you've got Pennsylvania, you've got Wisconsin, you've got Judge Beasley in North Carolina, whose opponent is Congressman Budd, who voted against infrastructure.

And her line is, this bud's not for you.

We've got Florida, we've got Ohio.

We're seeing

Tim Bryan in Ohio.

We're seeing

Val Demings in Florida, who has a real chance now.

Like Amy said, we pick up two seats and hold the house.

We make Roe v.

Wade the law of the land.

Thank you, you two.

Time for new roles.

New rolls.

Okay, New Rule, since Scott Dizzick just crashed a speeding Lamborghini into a mailbox and the mailbox is fine, but the car flipped over, I need to know two things.

One, where do I get that mailbox?

And two, Scott Dizzick is the world's least necessary man.

Where is he in such a hurry to go?

New rule, if you write an article about a video, it's just poor journalism not to have the video embedded in the article.

Please,

I read the news for one reason, to watch TV.

Neural, whoever designed these black wedding dresses must tell me what they were thinking, a black wedding dress?

What the fuck?

Black is the color we wear to events that mourn someone whose life has come to...

Oh, never mind.

General, someone has to thank this local Arkansas Police Department for beating up on a white guy this time.

I'm just saying maybe this is the unifying moment America needs.

Whether you're black or white, when the black and white shows up, you're going to be black and blue.

Now, what do you say, white people?

Let's go burn down a crate and barrel.

New rule, the cashier at Ralph's, must stop checking to see if my $100 bill is counterfeit.

It's rude.

I'm standing right in front of you.

And if I could print money, I wouldn't be shopping at Ralph's.

And finally, New Rule, the person the world needs to hear from most about the attack on Salman Rushdie, the person with the strongest moral voice on the issue of Islamist-inspired violence, is Salman Rushdie.

And the fact that he can't speak right now shows us that the wrong side won this round.

And make no mistake, there are two sides to this.

And no, they don't break down to Muslim and non-Muslim.

There are many brave Muslims and many cowardly, stupid liberals.

If all you can muster to say about this event is stabbing is bad and I'm against it without looking at the reasons behind it, you're useless.

And that describes pretty much the entire mainstream media.

And here's where the tweets start coming at me.

Hey, Bill, not every Muslim is responsible.

Of course they're not.

No serious person ever said they were.

This is what's called a strawman argument,

where a person doesn't engage with the actual points being made, but brings up a completely different point that was never being contested to begin with.

If we are, for example, discussing how technology has made our lives easier, and I say, the smartphone is a wondrous device, and you say, so you support toddlers working in sweatshops.

That's a straw man argument, even though I do support toddlers working in sweatshops.

But the straw man argument has been used so often with this issue that I'm discussing here tonight that I thought instead of letting Strawman's misleading arguments go unrebutted, I'd invite him on the show.

So please, a nice round of applause for Strawman, ladies and gentlemen.

See?

There he is.

There he is.

There he is.

He does.

And he's man-spreading.

Stay there.

Nice to have you on the show.

I appreciate you coming.

I hear you had a difficult flight.

I know those overhead bins can be very uncomfortable.

Anyway, there's someone I want you to meet.

This is Sylvana Fardos.

She is the mother of the young man who stabbed my friend.

When she was asked what she now had to say to her son, Ms.

Fardos said, I have nothing to say to him.

She said, I'm done with him.

Okay, that's a hero.

That's courage.

Silvana Fardos could have spewed the kind of weasley crap we heard from so many faint-hearted writers after the Charlie Edbo massacre.

Nonsense about how those murdered cartoonists had it coming because they were punching down and, well, yes, a room full of corpses, but on the other hand, those cartoons were offensive.

But she didn't do that.

She had the guts to say, I give no quarter to people who think like that, even when it's my son.

Now, am I saying every Muslim house is harboring a terrorist?

No.

What I am saying is liberals, instead of screaming Islamophobia every time someone points out the unique right that Islam demands to kill you if you insult their God,

you should be supporting people like Silvana Fardos and the vast majority of Muslims who came to this country because they didn't want to live under this kind of thuggery and theocracy.

Ms.

Fardos said her formerly outgoing son returned from a 2018 trip to the Hezbollah-controlled region of Lebanon, returned a religious zealot and a changed man, which raises the question, what happened in Lebanon?

Did he stay at the Holiday Inn Express?

Am I saying everyone in Lebanon is a fanatic?

No.

But Hezbollah, their idea of moderate is a hijacker with an emotional support dog.

We can't have exceptions for violence based on religion.

In a free country, we get to opine on religion or anything else without the threat of violence.

And I'm not.

And I'm not the bad guy for calling out the bad.

Excuse me, I'm still talking.

And I'm precisely saying they're not all bad guys.

Also, I thought victim blaming was something liberals hated.

Why do their values always get turned around when religion is involved?

Women's rights, gay rights, protecting children, separation of church and state.

and free speech.

Look, I don't know if you get to the theater a lot.

But there was a show a few years ago.

You probably remember this show.

We all remember it.

It was fantastic on Broadway.

It did very well.

The Book of Mormon.

You remember this show?

It poked fun at the Mormon religion and even more offensive, had music.

No, no, no, no, no.

Let's not kid each other.

Look, my friend, we both know what would happen if you tried to put on a show called The Book of Muhammad and poke gentle fun at Islam.

And no, again, I'm not saying most Muslims would want to bomb that theater, but just as certainly some young men would.

And saying so does not make me an Islam.

Let me finish!

Forget it.

But Silvana Fardos, she's who liberals should be supporting.

Salman Rushdie will survive because he's not a keyboard warrior.

He's a real warrior.

But I worry if this country's commitment to free speech will do the same.

All right, that's a show.

We're off next week and back September 9th.

It'll be at the Fox Theater in Detroit, October 8th, and at the Hulu in New York, November 12th, and at the Mirage in Vegas, November 25 and 6th.

I want to thank Rob Reiner, Amy Klobuchar, and John Waters.

Go to YouTube and join us on Overtime.

Thank you, folks.

Catch all new episodes of Realtime with Bill Ma every Friday night at 10.

Or watch him anytime on HBO On Demand.

For more information, log on to HBO.com.