Bonus Bill – Ep. #491

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Welcome to an HBO podcast from the HBO Late Night Series, Real Time with Bill Maher.

How are you doing?

Thank you very much.

Thank you.

Well, I know why you're happy today because President Trump says we are not shutting down the border, but he says from now on we are going to concentrate on the victims of human trafficking.

It's true, there's so many helpless women and children who are grabbed every day by ruthless coyotes.

Or worse, Joe Biden. I tell you, it's.

Yes, Joe Biden, with the touching noses, kissing the back of the head. It shatters my image of exactly who he is.

Luckily, the media is all over this story and are answering the question: can a man who touches a woman on the shoulders for 2020 beat a man who grabs him by the pussy? We have to know this.

And

one said she got a letter once from Joe Biden, and it seemed like the stamp had been licked too much.

It's ridiculous, ladies and gentlemen. And Nancy Pelosi came forward today with a solution.

She said, we should now, in this day and age, all pretend when we meet each other that you have a cold and I have a cold.

Another way, another little trick to keep your hands off somebody, pretend you're married to them.

Little

The slogan that he was thinking of, Biden 2020, how does that grab you? Out. That is not,

that's not going anywhere, that slogan. What a week Trump had.
He's in a Twitter war with Puerto Rico. He says they only take from the USA.

He is, it's getting very heated. Today he demanded his paper towels back.
This is really.

President Trump is like legitimately losing it even more than he has. I mean, some of the things that happened this week, first of all, apparently has forgotten where his own father was born.

He claimed his father was born in Germany. That is not true.
Trump's immigration policies were born in Germany, but not his father.

He

no, he seems to be really losing it. I mean, this is your own father.
You should know that. He said, my father was born in a very wonderful place in Germany.

Yes, a very wonderful dream place where all the women look like a vonca and everyone has blonde hair in their 70s.

It's an amazing place.

No, actually Trump's father was born in the Bronx. You're not an anchor baby, Mr.
President. You weigh the same as an anchor.

And you're shaped like a baby, but you are not an anchor baby.

Then,

you know, I'm telling you, he is, he's losing it. He then was at an event.
It was filmed. There were cameras all around.
It was on C-SPAN. He said, I hope this doesn't get out to the media.

And he went off on this thing about how windmills, windmills, cause cancer.

This is an interesting case for abnormal psychology textbooks because there are many cases of people who are off their rocker who think they're president. But how do you treat a guy who actually is?

You know?

I'm the leader of the free world.

And then, scariest of all, he tried to say the word origins, not that hard a word, origins. And he three times said oranges.

Much like when a toddler sees President Trump and his parents say, can you say president? And the kid says, oranges.

All right, thank you very much. We're going to go over here.

Okay, so

catch all new episodes of Real Time with Bill Maher every Friday night at 10, or watch him anytime on HBO On Demand. For more information, log on to HBO.com.