Bonus Bill – Ep. #467

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Welcome to an HBO podcast from the HBO Late Night Series, Real Time with Bill Maher.

Oh my God, have you missed the news? We've gone from there was no meeting to there was no collusion to now collusion is not a crime.

We are about two weeks away from Rudy Giuliani saying, you know what?

If Donald Trump's son met in an underground parking garage to accept unmarked bills and a metal briefcase from a Russian agent and it was strapped to his wrist, is that a crime? I don't think so.

Doesn't sound like it. Now this was chilling.
I know people thought this was a nothing story. I don't think this is a nothing story.
Stormy Daniels was arrested.

This is bad when the government goes after private citizens who were just their political enemies.

Stormy Daniels on trumped-up charges was arrested doing her strip club thing at a strip club in Columbus, Ohio. The police came in, they said, this is a bust.
She said, thank you.

But I'm telling you, this is a slippery slope. It is not good to be going after private citizens like that.
She's just doing her job. Let her do her job.
Dancing in strip clubs is not easy.

It's a real grind.

What the fuck is Q?

Another one of these right-wing conspiracy things that this, to explain this,

Q people it's a group of people who do not have a very high IQ

They believe in this crazy theory that Trump is a good president

They're just a bunch of brain-fried nut jobs who think that there is this I'm not making this up They think there is an international cabal of bankers and mostly pedophiles But this is new not that there isn't new crazy every week, but this is new new.

That suddenly, if you don't like someone now, you call them a pedophile. You know who they say are pedophiles? Tom Hanks.

Tom Hanks. Steven Spielberg.
Actually, everybody in Hollywood, pretty much, they say he's a pedophile. Well, that's not true.

There is an international cabal of child molesters, but they're not based in Hollywood. They're based in the Vatican.

But don't worry about the pedophiles. Trump's gonna get them.
There is a new sheriff in town. And if you're gonna rape something, it better be the earth.

And

finally, Apple announced today they are the first public company to be worth over $1 trillion,

which just shows to go that you can sell a shitload of any product if it's designed for you to drop it in the toilet.

Thank you very much. We're gonna go to the desk.

Catch all new episodes of Real Time with Bill Maher every Friday night at 10, or watch him anytime on HBO On Demand. For more information, log on to HBO.com.