Bonus Bill – Ep. #444

Welcome to an HBO podcast from the HBO Late Night Series, Real Time with Bill Maher.

Hey!

Thank you.

Free show, huh?

Free show in the middle of the day.

Okay, so any liberals or Democrats here today?

Or

just

Well, it was a big day, Tuesday, for the liberals, finally, right?

A big election day.

Did you hear about that?

Newshounds, huh?

Yeah, Republicans got their ass kicked.

Yeah.

I don't want to say Trump was upset, but today Puerto Rico was throwing him paper towels.

No, Virginia turned so blue, Kentucky had to give it it the Heimlich maneuver.

This was like the worst Republican beatdown I've seen since, well, whatever happened on Rand Paul's lawn last week.

What did happen on Rand Paul's lawn?

You know, things are looking so good for the Democrats.

Today, Bernie Sanders said he's considering joining the party.

Wow, that's

really good.

But

it was like liberal Christmas, right?

It was like liberals suddenly found out that a whole foods had moved next door.

No, it's amazing.

It was a big win for diversity across America.

In fact, we have now elected across America seven trans candidates.

And this is all thanks to a president who has taught us that it is okay for men to wear makeup.

I think, how about a hand for Donald Trump?

Now, this was largely, they say, a vote against Donald Trump.

Even though he wasn't on the ballot, this was a chance for people across the nation to speak up about how they feel about him after a year of living with him in office.

And it was kind of like that moment in Air Force One when Harrison Ford says, get off my plane.

And the people that did it, they say, are voters in the suburbs.

They have had enough of this.

Republicans tried to scare them with immigration rhetoric about Mexicans coming here, and it totally backfired.

Turns out suburban white people are much more freaked out about the possibility of having to mow their own lawn.

Yeah, this was the new strategy called Trumpism Without Trump.

And it turns out, if you want to win in today's Republican Party, you can't fake being an asshole.

You have to be an authentic asshole.

And we know who the authentic asshole is.

And he's in Asia right now.

Have you seen this?

Trump is on his trip to Asia.

He was in Japan.

Oh my God, talk about asshole.

He was in Japan two days ago.

He was imploring the Japanese to shoot down missiles if Korea fired them.

And he said to the Japanese, you're a warrior nation.

You're a country of samurai warriors.

Then he asked what they're going to do about Godzilla.

Oh, he's taking down the power lines.

You're a warrior nation?

You're a bunch of samurais?

This is like if the Japanese president came over here and said, America, cowboy, bang, bang.

Shoot man for snoring.

And then it was on to China he's been there for the last three days China of course exposes the big differences between our country and and China because China's can totally embraced globalization They've embraced addressing climate change robotics aerospace high-speed rail Trump on the other hand all in on closed borders and coal

It's like seeing another kid doing long division while yours is in the sandbox playing with cat poop

And tomorrow he's off to Vietnam.

And just at the thought of it, the bone spurs started acting up again.

Yeah, he's scheduled.

That's a big thing with Trump on this trip because in Vietnam he's scheduled to meet with Vladimir Putin and he's going to find out if he's going to get a Christmas bonus.

So thank you for coming.

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