Bonus Bill – Ep. #443

Charlie Sheen is an icon of decadence.

I lit the fuse and my life turns into everything it wasn't supposed to be.

He's going the distance.

He was the highest paid TV star of all time.

When it started to change, it was quick.

He kept saying, No, no, no, I'm in the hospital now, but next week I'll be ready for the show.

Now, Charlie's sober.

He's gonna tell you the truth.

How do I present this with any class?

I think we're past that, Charlie.

We're past that, yeah.

Somebody call action.

Yeah, aka Charlie Sheen, only on Netflix, September 10th.

Tires matter.

They're the only part of your vehicle that touches the road.

Tread confidently with new tires from Tire Rack.

Whether you're looking for expert recommendations or know exactly what you want, Tire Rack makes it easy.

Fast, free shipping, free road hazard protection, convenient installation options, and the best selection of Bridgestone tires.

Go to tire rack.com to see their Bridgestone test results, tire ratings, and reviews.

And be sure to check out all the special offers.

TireRack.com, the way tire buying should be.

Welcome to an HBO podcast from the HBO Late Night Series, Real Time with Bill Ma.

Did you have a great Halloween?

Legit, yeah.

You know what?

A fun Halloween over at the White House, the Trumps, Donald and Melania, they passed out, I'm not kidding about this, they go presidential M ⁇ Ms.

Kind of like M ⁇ Ms, except they melt down watching CNN.

Not in their mouth.

But this is a big week for America.

They announced criminal charges for three people, Paul Manafort, who was the campaign manager, his partner, Gate, and some guy you never heard of named George Papadopoulos, who...

pleaded guilty to making false statements to the FBI.

What an idiot, because, you know, you lie to the FBI, they're going to give you living hell.

But if you lie to the whole world, they make you the press secretary.

But it's so funny, after months of Trump insisting that, you know, no communication with the Russians, this guy Papadopoulos was communicating with everybody.

Talking to every Russian and then talking to the people in the Trump environment.

He met with a Russian agent called the professor.

The professor.

He met with someone who said she was Putin's niece.

He was even photographed meeting a senior Russian operative named Donald Trump.

But this Paul Manafort guy, wow, he's charged with money laundering, tax evasion, failing to register as a foreign agent, and he had three passports.

I didn't know you could do that.

I don't think you can.

Yes, exactly.

Three passports and a phone and an email account registered to fake names.

Can you imagine his interview to be Trump's campaign manager?

Yes, I have a long history of shady dealings with

Russia and avoiding taxes.

Now tell me about you, Paul.

Now

Manafort pled not guilty.

He denied everything, and he called the whole investigation a wasting tax dollars that he was avoiding paying.

And Trump says this is all fine because none of it touches him.

Trump's defense is that he had no involvement with the Trump campaign.

Really, he

Trump today called the New York Times to tell them he's not angry at the Mueller investigation, that he's personally not under investigation, and the man with a 38% approval rating said, I've got fantastic poll numbers.

And then the reporter from the Times said, can you put your father on the phone?

Now Trump is so desperate to distract America from the Russia investigation that he took a page out of Harvey Weinstein's book today and jacked off into a potted plant.

And then he realized, oh, it was Jared.

Poor Jared.

Well, you're right, poor Jared.

Jared is very out of favor

with Donald Trump, apparently for giving very bad political advice.

And

apparently, Ivanka, very pissed, too, at Jared, because in bed now, when Jared says, who's your daddy?

Ivanka says, President Donald J.

Trump.

But Trump, of course, did get the distraction he was looking for this week.

I'm sure you heard about this.

An Uzbek immigrant who loves ISIS drove a truck through a crowd in New York City and of course our commander-in-chief immediately rushed into

action with a series of powerful tweets about how it wasn't his fault.

And this asshole who did this was an Uber driver, so the problem won't be getting him to talk, probably getting him to shut up.

So I know you're upset about the World Series if you're from here in Los Angeles.

Houston may have the better baseball team, but we still have the most sexual harassment.

In LA, when you take a knee, it's to blow a producer.

But

all right, thank you very much.

Catch all new episodes of Real Time with Bill Maher every Friday night at 10, or watch him anytime on HBO On Demand.

For more information, log on to HBO.com.