Bonus Bill – Ep. #428

Charlie Sheen is an icon of decadence.

I lit the fuse and my life turns into everything it wasn't supposed to be.

He's going the distance.

He was the highest paid TV star of all time.

When it started to change, it was quick.

He kept saying, No, no, no, I'm in the hospital now, but next week I'll be ready for the show.

Now, Charlie's sober.

He's gonna tell you the truth.

How do I present this with any class?

I think we're past that, Charlie.

We're past that, yeah.

Somebody call action.

Aka Charlie Sheen, only on Netflix, September 10th.

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Welcome to an HBO podcast from the HBO Late Night Series, Real Time with Bill Ma.

Thank you very much.

You're very kind to me.

I appreciate it.

How's your week been going?

Where are my Trump fans?

It's been a rough week for Donald Trump.

I don't know if you saw this, but James Comey has been testifying before the Senate Intelligence Committee, or as I call it, James and the Giant Impeach.

Now, Comey today called Trump a liar five times.

Now, normally this would kind of be a big deal for the FBI director to call the president a liar five times.

But this is Trump.

This is like calling your sheepdog Shaggy.

I mean, it's just.

Trump asked him to shut down the investigation into Michael Finn.

I mean, shouldn't that be it?

Shouldn't this be over?

Shouldn't the van be pulling up to the White House, the moving van?

Shouldn't Trump's next tweet be, I'm having a yard sale?

Yeah, I mean, the one meeting that they're talking about today, I mean, the language here you just could not make up.

Trump says to Comey, I need loyalty.

And Comey says to him, you will always get honesty.

And Trump says, that's what I want, honest loyalty.

What are these two grown men talking about?

What the fuck does that mean?

I want honest loyalty.

And then Comey said, I love you.

But I'm not in love with you.

And Trump said, so you love me?

And Comey said, as a friend, a love friend?

So it's a date.

Okay, a friend date.

I mean, what the fuck is going on?

And the Republicans, you know, Jesus Christ, I just they never hit bottom

they get to the bottom of the barrel and they dig under the barrel Paul Ryan says he's new to government he's learning as he goes learning Republicans Jesus Christ they would put a donkey with a paintbrush in office if that paintbrush would sign their fucking tax cut for rich people

and and we haven't even gotten to what really is the biggest scandal of the week there was evidence that came out this week that the Russians not only were doing the shit they were doing hacking into Hillary's emails and that stuff, they were actually trying to get into the voting booths.

A NSA contractor named, I'm not kidding about this, this is the person's name, this is where it gets confusing.

Her name is Reality Winner.

Really?

Her first name is Reality and her last name is Winner.

I know.

It's so confusing.

We have a reality show president and this whistleblower's name is Reality Winner.

And she has said yes, and she revealed this information.

I think she's a hero.

But they're putting her in, yeah.

No, but now she's the one in trouble.

That's what I love about America.

In other places, shoot the messenger is just an expression.

And the other thing that would be a giant scandal if we weren't always drowning in other Trump scandals, the president's son, Eric Trump, has a, you know this story?

Right.

He has a children's charity to fight cancer.

Turned out they funneled hundreds of thousands of dollars from the children's cancer charity into Trump's golf courses.

The hat should say, Make America Throw Up in Its Mouth.

Thank you so much for coming out.

I really appreciate it.

Catch all new episodes of Real Time with Bill Maher every Friday night at 10 or watch him anytime on HBO On Demand.

For more information, log on to HBO.com.