Episode #393 (Originally aired 06/24/16)

This is Marshawn Lynch.

But on prize picks, being right can get you paid.

So I'm here to make sure you don't miss any of the action this football season.

With Prize Picks, it's good to be right.

With millions of members and billions of dollars awarded and winnings, Prize Picks is the best place to put your takes to the test.

The app is really simple to use and available in 40 plus states, including California, Texas, and Georgia.

Just pick two or more players across any sport.

Pick more or less on their projections.

And if you're right, you can cash in.

With simple stats and fan-friendly policies, PrizePicks is the best place to make your picks.

Most importantly, they don't play about your paper.

All transactions on the apps are fast, safe, and secure.

Download the PrizePicks app today and use code Spotify to get $50 in lineups after you play your first $5 lineup.

That's code Spotify to get $50 in lineups after you play your first $5 lineup.

PrizePicks, it's good to be right.

Must be present in certain states.

Visit PrizePicks.com for restrictions and details.

CRM was supposed to improve customer relationships.

Instead, it's shorthand for Customer Rage Machine.

Your CRM can't explain why a customer's package took five detours, reboot your inner piece, and scream into a pillow.

It's okay.

On the ServiceNow AI platform, CRM stands for something better.

AI agents don't just track issues, they resolve them, transforming the entire customer experience.

So breathe in and breathe out.

Bad CRM was then.

This is ServiceNow.

Welcome to an HBO podcast from the HBO late night series, Real Time with Bill Molly.

Good afternoon.

Afternoon, I will be

real time.

dirty guys.

All righty.

Sit down.

Thank you.

Thank you very much.

What a crowd.

Beautiful crowd.

All right.

Okay.

All right.

Okay.

All right.

All right.

Please, please, please.

Please.

I guess you don't have money money in the stock market because

it went down like 600 points.

You heard about what happened.

England has voted to Brexit.

Brexit, Britain leaving the European Union.

Now, you know what happened.

The issue got hijacked by a bunch of anti-immigration isolationists who were obsessed with the idea that foreigners were stealing their jobs.

Thank God something like that could never happen here.

Now the finals has happened just late last night.

The final tally is in from England.

48% voted for sense and sensibility.

52% voted for pride and prejudice.

So,

well,

you know, it's funny because I think as Americans, when we think of the British, we always just the image that comes into our mind.

We think of some refined, educated, charming accent played by Gwyneth Paltrow.

And then there's that other England, the soccer hooligan with three teeth,

who speaks English and you have no idea what one fucking word is.

True.

Now, economists all over the world are saying this is a catastrophically stupid move.

As evidence, they offer lots of data, lots of charts, and the fact that Trump is for it.

Well, he is.

Like he knows, they asked him about Brexit a couple of weeks ago.

He thought it was a laxative.

He had no idea what they were talking about.

He thought it was the name of one of Sarah Palin's kids.

But there actually was a lot of news this week.

Did you see the House Democrats had a sit-in for gun control?

A sit-in right on the House floor.

It was adorable.

Next week, they're going to have a bake sale to pay off the deficit.

I mean, do we need any more proof how dysfunctional this Congress is when they're literally sitting on the floor like a toddler in the serial aisle?

They said they were going to stay there until gun control passed or mom buys Pop-Tarts.

Several of the House members were asked how long they were willing to keep their protest going by staying seated on the floor and they said till hell freezes over

or one day.

One day.

I've waited longer for the cable guy.

Are you fucking kidding me?

Stop guns.

They didn't even stop the cleaning crew from coming in and shampooing the rugs.

Paul Ryan stood there in the speaker's chair at one point and scolded the Democrats on the decline of decorum.

And then he went back to supporting the Republican presidential nominee who once during this campaign made a speech with his line of stakes behind him.

The decorum.

Yes,

this is also the big news this week.

Conservatives on the Supreme Court have ruled against President Obama's executive order protecting millions of illegal immigrants from deportation.

Apparently, my gardener and I have to go back to don't ask, don't tell.

Yeah,

I love our judicial system.

Stairway to heaven, settled law, but this is up in the air.

But, you know, the Supreme Court ruling against President Obama, he took it like a man.

Can you imagine President Trump?

Well, I can't.

If the Supreme Court ruled against him, he would be like, oh, well, we have this Puerto Rican judge, Soda Mayer, very nasty person.

Puerto Ricans love me, but the Chiquita banana, Soda Mayer, she doesn't like me.

Oh,

very nasty person.

And

Alina Kagan, Cat Lady Kagan.

She doesn't like men, I'm hearing.

A lot of people are saying it.

She's very unfair to me because I have a penis, a huge, beautiful penis.

Nobody has a better penis than me, I will tell you that.

But here's the good news.

We found out this week that Donald Trump's campaign is basically broke.

They're sending out desperate fundraising letters.

What happened to the self-funding billionaire?

This campaign's so underwater they found Dory.

I'm not kidding.

They have no cash on hand, very few employees, no organization, no ground game, and worst of it is Christie ate all the stakes.

All right.

They got a great show.

Michael Steele, Paul McGala, Betsy Woodruff, and a little later I'll be speaking with Larry Wilmore from the nightly show.

First up, he is a musician and environmental activist and the youth director of the advocacy group Earth Guardians.

Shooters cut.

I hope I got that right.

Martinez.

Shoot his cotton.

Did I get that?

Okay.

You tried, man.

That's the point.

I tried.

You say it for me.

Shutezcott.

Shutezcott.

There you go.

Shooters cut.

Shutezcat.

There you go, perfect.

It's like you're shooing a cat.

Exactly.

Shutezcat.

Shutezcat.

Rid of that fucking cat out of here.

Alright, and that is an Aztec name.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You were Aztec, half Aztec, right?

Yeah, on my father's side, my heritage is from Mexico City, yeah.

Now tell us about the Aztecs, because I must admit my knowledge of South American history is not as good as it should be.

Yeah, I mean, well, we were colonized a long time ago, so a lot of what we should know about ourselves is lost.

But I carry on the tradition passed on by my grandfather, my ancestors, passed on to my father, given to me by my name, and through the traditions of the world.

But they seem, like we always hear, they're warriors.

They seem very badass.

I would say so, no, for sure.

I definitely consider myself a warrior.

And a warrior, and you have a...

And you're a warrior for a great cause, which is the environment.

I mean, you're here because you've made a lot of news.

First of all, you've made three speeches right at the UN.

That's correct.

Wow, that's three more than I've made.

And they were all on the environment.

Environment, climate change, my generation, all about that, yeah.

Yeah, you're 16.

You may be the youngest person on our show.

Set in record.

That's what's up.

Setting record.

So

you have this lawsuit.

Tell us about the lawsuit.

So myself and 20 other youth plaintiffs are coming together and working with an organization to actually work with our judicial system to say that

the government has a right, that we have a right to a healthy atmosphere.

And they are directly in violation of our public trust and of our constitutional right to a healthy atmosphere.

You think they're not doing enough to help you breathe.

Yeah, exactly.

And you think breathing is part of your rights.

I say it's pretty important, you know?

Right.

I mean, it's not specifically in the Constitution, but life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

How could you have any of those if you don't have breathing rights?

Well, climate change is the defining issue of our time.

It's the defining issue of our time.

It connects every other problem.

I always say the same thing.

I say

there's every other issue and then there's that issue.

Because if you don't solve that issue, there are no other issues.

And as an indigenous person, that was always part of their culture, right?

Was to take care of the earth.

Well, yeah, I mean, if you look at before Europe came and kind of messed shit up over here, you know, we were doing all right, living in balance with the world.

And so I guess taking those principles and taking those understandings that were passed on to me and working with technology innovation and what this new generation, like my generation is more innovative and have more entrepreneurs than ever before.

So, we can really work together to build a new world by calling out our leaders and reminding them they're not doing the job that they're put here to do.

But

let's not

pretend you are typical of your generation.

How many of your generation would give up their iPhone?

Yeah, I'm not going going to answer that.

No, I mean, no, I mean, you know, it's not just teenagers.

I mean, people in their 20s don't vote as much as they should.

I mean, it's a part of youth.

I mean, you have too many hormones.

Too many hormones, and you can get fucked up too easily without it hurting you.

Yeah.

I know from whereof I speak.

Yeah.

Yeah, well, I think, well, I mean, part of that, too, is that we're young and technology has has pulled our attention away from the world in a lot of ways because our generation is being bombarded with media that's showing us that it's over.

You know, climate change is the greatest issue of our time.

We have politicians that aren't supporting, you know, our survival.

And there's so many problems all over the world.

Everywhere we look, there's more crises.

And there's no way for our voices to be used to create solutions.

So young people are searching for that.

There's no outlet for us to engage in a world that is stacked against us.

We're systemically disempowered from the time that we're born.

So this generation, what I've seen personally, traveling around the world and talking to more and more of my generation, is that young people are ready to use their art, their poetry, their passion, their music to engage with the world and be leaders today.

Because, you know, sure, we're a future generation, but we're here now and we're not going to wait to make a difference.

This is our world.

Well,

it's all very feel-good here in the moment, but you know, again, you're speaking for like 2%.

Okay, the question is, how do you reach those other people?

Those other people who are just like,

I mean, mean I talk to young people all the time and they're like, well, the only news I get is what someone posts on my Facebook page.

They don't know about global warming because they don't read about it because it's just not part of their existence.

How do you reach those people?

I know you're a musician.

Is that it?

Exactly.

Well, so part of it is mainstream media, art, and music, things that young people can relate to.

Because if there's like a climate scientist in his 60s addressing a school classroom,

I'm going to be asleep.

I will be asleep.

Well, let's just say that's fucking wrong right now.

Of course, I agree.

I'm 60.

That's ageism.

I thought you were cool, dude.

No, man.

It's intergenerational.

It's intergenerational.

Wait, wait.

No, no, no.

You just said if there's somebody in their 60s, you don't even pay attention.

I said that.

Maybe you should learn something here, brother.

Well, maybe I will.

All right.

But yeah.

We came to an agreement.

It's all good.

That's right.

You know, usually Indigenous peoples are cool about respecting elders, you know, because we've been here longer, so we know shit.

Dude, you didn't let me finish.

You didn't let me finish.

I think it's part of it:

to get other young people engaged, they have to see that there's young people actually doing something in the world.

And in mainstream media, we're not portrayed as leaders.

We're not portrayed as leaders.

We're portrayed as you know, young people that are breaking the law and just wasting time.

So, if we begin to tell the stories of the millions of young people in the world that are doing incredible things and collaborate with our elders and the older people in society that are leading the way and have the wisdom and the knowledge that we need, we're going to create such an amazing future if we take that potential that we have and our elders and collaborate.

Right.

We got to.

Right.

That energy and idealism with the knowledge.

Yeah, there you go.

And one last thing.

I think this is really interesting.

Your goal is not just about the environment specifically.

It's about changing the way we live, our lifestyles.

Too much materialism, right?

Too much stuff.

Yeah.

We don't have a lot of stuff.

Well, I think the system is built so that

you have a lot of suit.

Dude, I will never be able to afford a suit this nice.

But.

Really, where'd you get that suit?

A gift from a friend.

Let's leave it at that.

But

no, man, I think.

That's right.

Leave Milani at it.

A lot of people don't look at the world in the way that we value it.

You know, we have a disconnection to the planet, to ourselves, and to each other.

And a lot of people won't care where we get our energy as long as we can still have the lights on as long as we can and drive our cars as much as we can.

They don't care if it's a Prius or not.

But we've got to reduce, right?

We've got to stop thinking in terms of big mansions and more and more.

And we're all kind of hoarders, aren't we?

Well, and it's about, it's not even just about like, oh, let's protect the environment.

No, not a lot of people.

There's a lot of people in the world that don't care about the environment.

But people care about their kids, about their grandchildren, about their legacy that they're going to leave behind.

That's what's at stake.

That's what's at stake, is the kind of world my generation is going to be left with.

That's what I'm fighting to protect.

That's what my message is all about.

And that's why people got to listen.

I am more optimistic for meeting you.

I really appreciate it.

Thank you very much.

All right, we hope to have you back

until I'm 80.

All right, let's meet our panel.

All right.

Yeah, when I'm 80, he'll be 36.

How depressing is that?

I know.

All right, he's a survivor of the Clinton Moore Room, a CNN contributor, and an affiliated professor of public policy at Georgetown University.

Paul Bagala.

There he is.

Okay, she reports politics for the Daily Beast.

Please welcome Betsy Woodroof.

Hey, Betsy, how you doing?

And he was the chairman of the Republican National Committee.

What?

He's one of the good ones.

But now is no doubt having more fun co-hosting SiriusXM Steele and Unger.

Please welcome Michael Steele over here.

Thank you back.

Remember to send us your questions for tonight's overtime so we can answer them after the show on YouTube.

And remember to watch our convention coverage we're on three nights during the conventions for the Republicans and the Democrats in July Wednesday Thursday and Friday because they're going to be throwing chairs at your convention yeah they will yeah they will

I tell people bring the popcorn and the flack jacket oh yeah that's right all right so let's

Nancy Yousaf who has literally covered the Arab Spring in Egypt was in our Slack channel the other day and said I'm serious about this.

If anyone needs a flak jacket or a helmet that I was wearing covering this up, I'm happy to lend it to you all.

So if anyone needs one, I'm a fashion friend with a daily basis.

I've never been to a riot before, so I'm going to be in Cleveland.

Oh, that's going to be your convention, right?

Could be.

No.

Currently, baby, come on.

Oh, yeah, maybe.

All right.

Well, that's why we're covering both conventions.

Yeah, come on.

All right.

Well, hey, shut up.

We have important issues to talk about.

Brexit.

Oh, my God.

It's been bothering me all day.

Not really.

You know, for those that don't follow such issues, let me just say, this is not really new.

There's been a dream of a united Europe for about a century, right?

In 1957, when I was one there,

my friend, one years old, the common market, that was the ancestor of that, right?

And then we had the European Union.

It's a way to unite the European countries.

Some people say it'll never work.

What does someone in Iceland have in common with somebody in Albania?

There's always been this tension.

And with globalization, of course, there's always winners and losers.

Now, it was good for people, 27 different, 28, well now 27 in the European Union.

If you were a Polish engineer in Krakow, you could move to Manchester, England and work.

No passports, no borders.

Okay.

What they're saying today, interestingly enough, is for us Americans,

what matters is that this is sort of a harbinger for Donald Trump, because they didn't think this was going to pass.

This is the same issues that Trump is talking about.

You know, we're getting screwed on trade, too many immigrants, and

they underestimated Trump, they underestimated this.

What do you think?

I think definitely.

Ray Finch is the UKIP member of parliament in the European Union Parliament, and yesterday he was on CNN and made the argument against immigration that's almost verbatim of what Donald Trump and Jeff Sessions say, which is, we don't hate immigrants.

However, if you bring in lots of low-skill workers, it drives wages down.

So big corporations want that to happen because it increases their profit margin.

That, word for word, is the case that immigration restrictionists in the U.S.

make.

It's the identical argument.

It works on both sides of the pond.

It's a matter of expectations too.

And that's something that a lot of people are talking about.

Well, Donald Trump is taking advantage of this.

Well, this has been brewing in Europe for quite some time.

What Donald Trump did was recognize it and brought it here.

And it's that connection between the anxiety that families and middle class workers across Europe have, coupled with what you see happening here in the United States.

And in the U.S., as in Europe, it's led to certain types of movements, whether it's

a Tea Party or move on or whatever.

It's like a right-wing populism.

I mean, here in America.

It's a conservative populism that...

People love their entitlements and hate Mexicans.

Well,

what it is, it's basically white folks concerned about the integration into their communities and the migration of people of color from the African continent into Europe and from around the world here to the U.S.

That said, to kind of hijack the narrative a little bit, New Yorker had a piece about Jeremy Corbyn, who's the leader of the Labour Party in Europe,

in the U.K.

And they quoted one of his associates of 40 years saying that Corbyn, who's a very leftist politician, probably secretly supported the Leave effort because

it messes up these coalitions.

It's not the same thing.

It's the same way that 22% of Bernie voters say they're going to vote for Trump.

People are complicated or something.

Well, politics is complicated right now.

I doubt that's going to come true.

But a much higher percentage of Hillary voters say they would never vote for Obama, and they all did.

Okay, because Senator Bann Obama did his job.

That's a different type of voter.

But just like here, the young people didn't show up that much in Britain.

And if they don't show up here, welcome President Clown Meet.

No,

that's absolutely true.

In Britain, the line

was right at age 50.

Everybody younger than 50 voted to stay.

Everybody over 50 voted to leave.

And the older you were, the more polarized it was.

Under 25, 75% of Britons under 25 want to stay.

And like 75% of those over 65 and 70 wanted to leave.

So

there's a generational war there as well as a class war.

But not to make everything about Donald Trump, but

since this is about money and the pound just took a pounding time.

I mean, these people inflicted a wound on themselves that they're not going to get over for quite a while.

Okay, I seem to remember Donald Trump saying we could default on Treasury bills.

Where do you think the world went today?

Treasury bills.

Exactly.

Donald Trump said this week,

he was asked how would you renegotiate the debt, our debt.

You go back and you say, hey, guess what?

The economy just crashed.

I'm going to give you back half.

I guess my question to you, Michael, is,

what is the bridge too far?

What is the point at which you say, okay, my country before my nominee?

Well,

I think that's an individual judgment that you're seeing and hearing a lot of Republicans make across the country, and certainly within the party.

What's yours?

Well, you know, look, I'm straight up.

I'm a party guy.

I was a national chairman.

I was a county chairman.

I was a state chairman.

So there's no bridge too far.

No, no, no, there is.

There is a bridge too far.

And what I want to see, and I've been very clear about this from the very beginning,

I want to see Donald Trump make the kinds of steps, and I know he won't be a 70-year-old man, so this idea that he's going to change, it's just not in the the cards.

More ages.

So, sorry.

But he's not.

He hadn't changed his hairstyle in 35 years.

He's not going to change his campaign style.

But

here's the rub.

I philosophically

cannot sit there and go, oh, well, because I'm so pissed off and can't stand Donald Trump, that I'm just going to fall in love with Hillary Clinton.

That's just not where I am.

It's not about Donald Trump, it's about the policies he represents.

Exactly.

Lindsey Graham said there'll come a time when the love of country will trump hatred of Hillary.

I feel like this election

And that may be where we head that veteran may be where we head.

I feel like it's a referendum on decency at this point.

This is an indecent man.

But it's not just, but it's not Bill.

Bill, it's not just about, I mean, you make the point, it's not just about Donald Trump and the indecency that you may see in him.

It's about the process as well.

It's about the indecent process.

That's also what's a big driver for a lot of folks out there.

They feel left behind, they feel spat upon, they feel neglected, they feel cheated.

I mean, you look at wages, you look at income, you look at opportunities.

I mean,

for a lot of Americans, it's all put together.

Really?

You cannot separate the individual characteristics out that easily.

That's a bullshit argument.

It's not a bullshit argument.

This is the, yes, Donald Trump is a horrible ass clown, but he raises a good point.

Okay, look, all I can give you, Bill, is at the beginning of this campaign cycle, there was the focus group that was done, and you probably saw it, Paul, up in New Hampshire.

And you had a working mom of two kids, single mother, right?

And they're asking her about Donald Trump.

And what was her response?

He's one of us.

He's just like me.

Now, so you have to try to figure out, and that's a legitimate answer from a white female in her 30s with two kids in New Hampshire.

Not a reassuring one.

But I'm just saying.

Yeah, he may not be.

Exactly.

It may not be that.

He's just like me.

He's tweeting bullshit at three in the morning.

But Bill, you're not afraid of that.

But so

you're not taking the time to try to figure out, okay, so what is it that you're seeing and hearing from him that makes you think that and understand him that way?

It's a different issue than voting for someone who wants to deport 11 million people, who wants to ban all Muslims, who's for torture, who's for birtherism.

So

how do you answer, Bill?

How do you answer the poll that came out during the middle of the primary?

The question was asked, is Islam compatible with the values of America?

How many Americans answered that question

in the negative?

I'm the one who answers that question honestly.

And it was 56% of Americans said Islam was not compatible with America.

It is the same person who's looking at Donald Trump and saying, he's one of us.

So you've got to figure out how to do that.

But the answer isn't to ban all Muslims.

No, they're the same people who honored Muhammad Ali when he passed away as an American icon, and he was an American icon and an American Muslim.

I get what you're saying, yeah, but

I'm trying to understand.

What does that have to do with 1.5 billion Muslims in the world?

It's bizarre and stupid to try to ban every Muslim

America.

It's insanely important.

But it's not wrong.

But his point was also not wrong.

I mean, I hear a lot of talk today about xenophobia.

And is it really phobia if you have something to be afraid of?

52%

of British Muslims think being gay should be illegal.

Yeah.

That's the kind of thing that would happen.

What percentage of American Republicans believe that?

Can we deport them?

Not just American Public.

Not many.

Shoot.

Not many.

Do they think it should be illegal?

Sure.

No, I don't think it's a popular paper.

That's bullshit.

You know what?

Stop it.

Stop it.

Just stop it.

Stop it.

It wasn't illegal until a few years ago.

There certainly is a hard-right wing in this country, but they have no power.

It's a lot different.

Do you really think if

America had Muslimized ghettos, Muslimized, that's not the right word, radicalized ghettos of Muslims like London and Brussels and Paris,

where a woman who would walk down the street in a short skirt would be hassled because it was anti-Islamic.

What would Americans do if that happened in this country?

We would not put up with it.

We're a pluralistic society.

We have Muslims here.

I really don't know Britain.

I don't know France.

But they're integrated here very wonderfully.

They really are.

No, the other important thing is that there is significant evidence that when Muslims immigrate to the United States, they assimilate better in this country.

Way better.

And that's a good thing, and I think people miss that.

And a lot of the fear of foreigners coming here is that we have this myth that when they move to the United States, it's going to be a horrible disaster and everything's going to be ghettoized, and it's a nice thing.

We've been successfully assimilating immigrants for forever.

Can we all agree on this?

Because even the people

who fight me on this issue usually agree Islam needs a reformation.

Do we all agree on that?

Agree.

Yes.

Like the Christian world had in the 1400s, 50, whatever it was.

Okay, an enlightenment, a reformation.

What is mostly stopping that is that, I agree, there are a lot of moderate Muslims in the world.

They are afraid to speak out because of violent intimidation.

But that's a very important thing.

Okay, and every time somebody says Islamophobia, it gives the people who are intimidating cover.

No, no, but but every time we bash Muslims as an entire religion, it empowers the fanatics, not the moderates.

Because in the fanatics, they say, look, all the Americans hate you, all the Christians hate you.

That said, the fanatics are going to find ways to empower themselves no matter what.

I mean, look, are we?

If we're going to say, you can't mention this or you can't say this, because it's useful to radical Islamists, I mean, look, are we going to redact everything Bill Clinton did in 1996?

Because that ends up in ISIS propaganda.

I just think it's silly to say, oh, this is helpful to radical Muslims, but we can't say it at all.

The Reformation point, I think, is an important one, and where that really has to begin is within the Muslim community itself.

And you talk to a lot of folks, and Bill, you touched on it, there is an inherent fear because they don't want to be the target.

They don't want to have their families subjected to that kind of aggression within the community.

So they stay silent.

So

my argument is, how can we all help them elevate the argument within the community?

By defeating Donald Trump.

That would be a good question.

Because what he is doing is

Donald Donald Trump in defeating the idea that we're going to block Muslims from coming to the country.

At the same time, though, we also need to be reality-based and understand that the United States has a different immigration situation than Europe has.

You can't transplant it and be like, oh, Europe has a problem, therefore America has a problem.

Light your hair on fire.

Right.

Silly.

Okay.

All right.

Let me go to something lighter.

We noticed here at real time that, and it's sort of apropos to the discussion, that the internet does not just radicalize would-be terrorists.

It radicalizes everybody.

There is something about social media that makes people incredible assholes in a way they never would be in person.

Look at this tweet.

This is somebody during the NBA finals tweeting Steph Curry's three-year-old,

fuck your whole family.

That's so typical.

That's not an outlier on the internet.

And just to show that this could happen to anybody,

we noticed that three months ago, the Keebler Elves got a Twitter account.

And look, here's Ernie's first tweet: Do I call this a selfie or an elfie?

You see, it's a, I want to hashtag these fudge drives.

Which one of these is a hashtag?

It was all so innocent.

Three weeks later, look at some of the tweets from this guy.

Lucky Charms, want something really magically delicious, you mick bastard, eat my dick.

Oh my god.

At Kool-Aid Man, try using the door sometime, asshole.

At Pope Francis, at least my big dumb hat gets me pussy.

If I ever catch a girl scout outside my tree, I'll cut a bitch.

Our cookies don't cost an arm and a leg, but they're going to cost Chris Christie a foot.

The secret ingredient to our cookies, love.

Hashtag I jerk off on them.

That explains the swirls.

A donkey is one of the good ones.

At Lamasil mascot, are you supposed to be toe fungus?

You look like a sea monkey had a crack baby.

At Lindsey Graham, why do I get the feeling you handle more nuts than I do?

Telling you, the internet.

Slogan should be, nobody doesn't lick Sara Lee.

At Little Debbie knows what I'm talking about.

At Lil Debbie, stop using that old photo, you 52 years old, bitch.

Deal with it.

All right.

He is a comedian and host of Comedy Central's The Nightly Show.

Larry Wilmore is over here.

Larry Wilmore.

Larry.

Goodbye.

Paul.

Great to meet you.

Thank you.

Okay.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Wait, Bill, I have to say, before we get started.

Before we get started.

Before we get started.

I love a guest who does this.

Yes, because I have to say this, because, you know, I have my own show now.

And, you know, I get asked all these questions about influence and everything.

And I always felt that you never got your due props for starting late-night political talk and making it cool.

And I just would say, thank you.

I don't want to get all Sammy and my mother.

No, no, no.

That's very true.

No, but I wouldn't be Ryan.

And I don't get the props for still being the best.

Anyway, here's the thing marriage

um do you care about brexit larry i love brexit brexit i have brexit every morning actually

brothers see my brothers brexit bill

um you know what i think most americans don't know what the fuck brexit is they don't they don't care until a few weeks yeah and now they're trying to say oh there might be a brexit really there's gonna be a brexit well it's also so eurocentric i was thinking talking to my young half-Aztec friend there at the beginning of the show.

Yes, I followed it.

And I was saying, I don't really know my South American history like I should because when I was in school, and we're roughly the same age, same generation, right?

Same generation, kind of.

Okay, your mid-50s?

Yeah, 54.

All right, you're old, Larry.

Don't try to make a difference.

Black don't crack, though.

That's the difference.

Well,

black does crack, it just cracks more slowly.

No one is confusing Miss Jane Pittman with Siara.

That's true.

And black and the history of crack is not a fun thing.

No, no, that's fun.

We can do the black crack thing online at school.

Come on, man.

Listen to it.

What I was going to ask you is, like, when I was in school, it was very Eurocentric, the history they taught us.

And when you did a correspondence dinner, which we'll talk about in a minute, you were very eloquent at the end.

And you said to the president, you know, when I was growing up,

people wouldn't even imagine a black man being a quarterback.

That's true.

I was not making that up.

No, of course.

I remember that.

Yes, when it was a controversy.

So

did that cross your mind as a kid that you, like I remember in school, the only time Africa came up is when Vasco da Gama sailed around it.

Yes, when someone was avoiding it.

Right, exactly.

Yes, they were avoiding it.

Yeah,

and even as black people, we've had a difficult relationship with Africa.

Even when we tried to get Afrocentric, that didn't last too long.

Because I think of Africa, I think hot and brothers who speak French, which I don't believe is in God's plan.

Wouldn't agree.

And things that might eat me.

But everything was Eurocentric, I guess you could say.

I mean, that's your education.

But I've always felt that.

But that's not fair.

Well, it kind of the world that you were in.

We didn't even think about it as being fair then.

We're in a completely different world in how we view everything today.

Right.

You know, and so there's a different context for everything.

And Obama has been a game changer in a lot of that, too.

Of course.

Just as an example, and that's what I was trying to get to.

Right.

And notice when

during

your routine at the correspondence dinner, the two things that you were poking him with were not closing Gitmo

and drones.

Yeah.

Drone strikes.

Now, do you think he's really wrong about those issues, or was that just...

He had no intention of closing Gitmo, let's be honest about that.

I disagree strongly.

I don't think so.

Congress, that was Congress who didn't.

Yeah, but when he was running, he ran to the left of Hillary Clinton.

Like the whole vote thing, Hillary had to vote for the war.

She had no choice.

And I thought she should have owned that vote bill because she was a freshman senator.

Think about this.

She was a freshman senator from New York where the World Trade Center event happened.

Sure.

It's a year after.

What is she supposed to do?

You know, have a no vote in that situation?

And they're going to say, oh, the woman wouldn't vote for force.

You forget, it was not a vote to go to war.

Correct.

It was a vote to give Bush a badge and a gun, and that idiot fired it.

Yeah, we didn't know the sheriff would go all

crazy in El Cottie.

Yeah, but Obama's very smart.

He ran to the left of Hillary.

He didn't have to vote on the war.

And I think Gitmo was one of those positions.

People may disagree with me, but I think when you become president, you get in there and you say, oh, shit, I can't close Gitmo.

What the fuck was I thinking?

And that's what happened.

And how about the drones?

Because I noticed last week after the Orlando shooting, Donald Trump made his comments, and then Obama came back and said, you know, Donald Trump's rhetoric, you know, this is what's stirring up the radical Muslims.

And I thought, maybe the drone strikes, too.

Maybe a little more drone strikes than words.

Not that I'm against drone strikes necessarily, but let's get real about what's really making people mad.

No, it's true.

I mean, no, you're absolutely right.

It's definitely problematic.

And if you're on the left and you've been silent about that, that's something that I can understand because you talk about due process and just indiscriminate killing and how many innocent people who aren't even engaged in war and all of a sudden, what the fuck, there's a bomb next door.

Are we in a war?

What's going on?

I mean, that's crazy.

And as you say, sure, if you're killing people who deserve to be killed, I guess.

Who determines that?

I don't know.

We just have to take all this on trust.

And, you know, our government hasn't had a good record.

It's a naughty issue.

There's no great answer.

It hasn't had a good record

in that trust experience.

So you know that no matter what you do in this life, Larry, you could cure cancer.

You could be the space tourist who goes to Mars.

Your obituary will say the dude who called the president the N-word.

I didn't call him the N-word, I called him my nigga.

Yeah.

There's a difference.

There's a difference.

If I had said,

if I had said, yo, my...

I'm not indifferent to white people because I don't see either white.

Exactly.

Right?

So no buyer's remorse?

No, absolutely not.

You have to own it.

Just because people made a controversy of it.

I loved it.

Yes, no, you have to own it as a comedian.

You have to own everything that you do.

And that was a special moment, you know.

That was like a black private moment in front of white people.

Right?

Oh, man.

And people were like, oh, my God.

Wait, black people talk differently when we're not around?

How the fuck, when did that happen?

And Obama knew it, because if you saw his non-verbal communication, which is always kids, he immediately did this.

He didn't do this.

No, no, he.

He had your back.

But you needed to look at Michelle.

She had a different look on her.

Michelle, just like it.

What was her look?

Her look was not appreciative.

No.

Well, I had dinner with the first lady.

She was very cold.

She was.

Okay, well, we'll have to check on that.

All right.

So let's get to that other big issue that happened this week was the sit-in that the Democrats did.

Do you have a gun, Larry?

I do not.

I do not have a gun.

Would you like one?

Because I've got several.

And I thought it was so typical of the paralysis in our government that Louis Gohmert got up there at one point and he was screaming, radical Islam, radical Islam, to the people who were trying to pass a bill to stop radical Islam.

Because the bill that they were talking about was no fly, no buy.

People on the no-fly list don't get to buy a gun.

But you shouldn't make fun of the mentally challenged.

And Louis is a dope.

He's an idiot.

No, he's a first-class idiot.

He's from my state of Texas.

And he's just a fool and an idiot.

But what they're trying to do is pretty common sense.

Hey, we have these terror watch lists.

If you're on that list, you shouldn't be able to buy a gun.

Pretty simple.

Yeah, but it's not that simple.

You can't get on an airplane.

John Lewis was on the no-fly list, for God's sake.

You know, it's very problematic.

When the government starts making lists and says, no, motherfucker, you can't do this and you can't do that.

That's very problematic.

But once you're on a list, I bought a sex toy 15 years ago.

I still get the catalog.

That's what I'm talking about.

It's very

good.

Also, like, like,

let's remember, it's really easy to to be chill about the no-fly list when your name sounds like you're a character on the Brady Brunch.

When the reality is that for Arab Americans, for Muslims, for folks from South Asia, like, getting on the no-fly list, first, you might not know.

You might not find out until you show up at the airport, right?

And then, second, we're going to legitimize these secret lists as a way of doing law enforcement.

I think that's

as simple as

that.

We can make the list more transparent.

We can give people more redress, but we can't just sit here and let somebody who's on a terrorist watch list buy a gun and go into Orlando nightclubs.

No, we shouldn't.

Of course,

it says a a lot about how,

I mean, I saw David Cameron today.

You know, I'm up at two in the morning when this all happened.

So I watched his whole speech, and it's like, well, I lost the vote.

I graciously leave office.

It's like their system works so beautifully.

We can't even get a vote on something that 90% of Americans agree on and can't get a vote.

Our system sucks.

Really does.

The Constitution needs a page one rewrite.

To be fair, if they voted, it wouldn't have passed.

Yeah,

if they voted on the bill, it wouldn't have have passed.

That sucks, too.

It does.

That doesn't reflect the people.

But here's a distinction between a terrorist watch list and a no-fly list.

For me, it's a terrorist watch list, and we're talking no-fly lists.

There's several different lists that the deal conflates.

Maybe you need to disaggregate them and look at them differently.

It's not perfect.

It's not.

But nothing in life is.

Doesn't mean we should.

The thing about it.

I agree.

At this point, when you do have an issue, and it still is a 90-10 issue in this country when it comes to guns, even ardent gun owners

want the Congress to do something to begin to turn the conversation around.

And you have four bills in the Senate that went down.

You don't have anything in the House.

And the country looks at this, and this goes back to the beginning of our conversation, and you wonder why people are pissed off.

And you wonder why people are looking at leadership and going to hell with you, because you can't even deal with the basics.

When you have 20 school kids die in San Diego, and that was a turning point for me on this issue.

Don't cry me a river, don't sit on the damn floor of the Congress now, four or five years later, singing, We Shall Overcome, when in Chicago, just a couple years ago, 560 young black men and women were killed, and there was not one song for someone

with aid.

There was not one protest for them.

So don't start this all of a sudden concerned about guns.

But that's not true.

There actually were many protests.

Not in our Congress.

No, but there were many protests, and there were many tears crafted and they just weren't covered on the news.

That's true.

The problem is not, I don't blame, and obviously I'm a professional Democrat.

I don't blame the Republicans.

I don't blame the NRA.

I blame the American people.

I helped Bill Clinton pass the Brady bill.

The next election, we lost 56 House seats.

And by one analysis, 19 of them were only because of gun control.

Okay, 19 people lost their careers to pass the Brady bill.

I'll give you.

How many lost their seats after Sandy Hook?

Wait, Zero.

The Republicans won a landslide after they killed President Obama's Sandy Hook gun control bill.

That's the fault of the American people for voting these clowns back in.

I'll give you the 20th, though.

Al Gore.

In 2000, may have lost the presidency because of the gun issue.

Al Gore in 2000 lost his home state of Tennessee.

He did.

That was probably because of guns.

But let me ask this question about guns.

Does it really matter if we are banning certain guns?

Because I see that the liberals, they talk about guns.

Now, I'm not a gun expert, but I see a lot of people talking about guns who don't know shit about guns.

I know a little about it.

It's like when the Pope talks about vaginas.

And that's when the conservatives stop listening.

Like, I know a lot of them think that AR-15, AR stands for assault rifle.

It doesn't.

And it's not an assault rifle.

It's not an automatic weapon.

Those are illegal.

There are a lot of weapons that are not even talking about banning that basically do the same thing as an AR-15 because you have to squeeze each round.

It's not

squeeze it.

That's what they had in Paris, by the way.

Yeah, those are all guns that no one's talking about making illegal that basically would do the same thing as the rifle.

It's just longer.

Not to mention those are the guns that were used in the Virginia Tech shooting, which I believe was the largest mass shooting until the Orlando shooting happened.

It's very easy to put up pictures of AR-15s and say, look at this gun, it's scary, it's ugly, no one should be allowed to have this killing machine.

But the reality is that they're used to commit just a teensy, tiny fraction of guns.

And also mass shootings.

The Washington Post says in 2015, 39 deaths from mass shootings.

Now, of course, we should say any death is too many, blah, blah, blah.

But let's get real.

A lot of this is a little bit elitist and a little bit racist, like you were starting to say.

It's like when shootings happen to white people in nice places.

I think.

That's the black.

Yes, that's the.

I don't think white people can make that sound.

What I got is, I think you should focus on the purchasers more and the weapons less.

I have

a lot of guns.

I'm a lifelong hunter, and I hunt, and I love it, and I shoot and I have a rifle range.

I love guns.

I'm very pro-gun.

But when you focus on keeping the guns out of the hands of felons, keeping them out of the hands of people who are on a reasonably constructed terrorist watch list, domestic abusers, when we passed the Brady bill, the NRA said, oh, all life would end.

Guys like me who are hunters could never get a gun.

Well, we can, but 2.6 million felons have been stopped from buying a gun because of the Brady bill.

Now, President Obama only wants to expand that a little bit and expand the background checks just a little bit.

And the NRA is just screaming like we're taking away the Second Amendment.

That is legislation we should absolutely get.

And I can't even get a vote on it.

But, you know, I got to say,

when I hear someone from the supposed anti-gun party say what you just said, that's when I stop listening.

When it starts from the Democrats with, well, I'm a strong supporter of the Second Amendment.

I like hunting.

I like guns.

I don't like killing people with them.

Well, I think guns are designed to kill something.

Right.

You know.

They're not designed to scare.

You can't put a gun on stun, you know, unless you have a stun gun.

But I think we need to take the glorification of guns out of the hands of the American psyche.

Yeah, that's a big battle.

I agree with that.

That's a question for L.A.

Let me ask a political question before we run out of time.

I mean, last week I was ready to pronounce Donald Trump pretty much over, and I see now he's basically tied with Hillary in Ohio and Pennsylvania.

We just cannot kill this monster.

Every time I think this monster is

to be fair, the polls that show them tied in Ohio and Pennsylvania are from Quinnette Piak, which is not a great pollster, had a very bad record during the primary.

Why is he?

Why is he even close?

If he has no money, he's broke, she's buying all the advertising, she's got all the organization, she's got all the people, he's a fucking nut.

How come it's this close?

I would direct that question to our Clinton supporter friend as to why she's not doing better.

Here's why.

First off, Trump has consolidated the right.

And Paul Ryan, a few other whiners, if you look at the polling, he's consolidated the right.

Hillary still has to consolidate the left.

Bernie's still out there.

He's not really running.

But that's a job that Hillary and Bernie are going to work on.

She has to consolidate the left to get her base together.

But in these swing states, in the Rust Belt states, Ohio and Pennsylvania, you talked about, and some of the others across the Midwest, you have a disproportionately high number of high school educated white people.

Okay, that's his base.

And so in places where they're higher, he's going to do better.

He's getting killed in Florida, even in the Quinnipiac poll, because it's a more diverse state.

But

people think this thing is over, they're nuts.

Our act today is a lot of people.

I hear it all the time.

Hillary has got it in the bag.

Hillary has a shopping cart.

Only thing she has in the bag is hot sauce.

And look at it from.

We just put $10.5 million today into Pennsylvania.

But look at it from the $70 million in other states.

I mean, this thing is.

You asked earlier about Donald Trump and the money, and you did

$1 million, $1.3 million in his account as of the end of May, $42 in her account.

Donald Donald Trump is looking at this and he's going, so let me get this.

I've spent $55 million over the last year.

I bested 16 Republicans.

All right.

I'm now the nominee.

And I've had the worst possible six weeks any Republican, any candidate in the history of this country has ever had.

And the latest poll has me down by seven.

Right.

Where is there a problem for me?

Exactly.

Yeah, it's a problem for us.

Thank you, panel.

All right, time for new rolls.

New roll just once, an Olympic mascot shouldn't make me wonder if my weed has been spiked with angel dust.

Meet the Rio Olympics, Vincius and Tom, or as I call them, flashback and bad trip.

Although, last time in London was even worse.

Look at these two.

You have to go all the way back to Montreal in 76 to find a mascot that wasn't scary, because who doesn't love a big hairy beaver?

New Roll, now that America has flown its flags at half-staff more than any time in our history, let's change our policy to always keep our flags at half-staff and only raise them when something awesome happens, like Bieber falling in a hole.

New Roll, everyone must join me in congratulating Taylor Swift and Tom Hiddleston on their newfound romantic...

What's that?

It's over.

Sorry.

Never mind.

Neural, now that Charlie Sheen has joined Bristol Palin as celebrities advocating for safe sex, how about we find a condom advocate who's actually used one?

Neural, we don't need to see Donald Trump's tax returns.

We need to unsee this picture of him and his daughter.

Here's how you know your pose is too creepy if it makes a parrot vomit.

And finally, New Rule, since President Obama is constantly being accused of going on an apology tour, he should just go on one.

For two reasons.

It will drive Republicans nuts, especially if he wears the turban.

And more importantly, to a world that has been trembling over the prospect of us electing Donald Trump, it would be a great way to send the message, America, we're back on our meds.

So

it's true, the president is coming to the last six months of his term, which after seven and a half years in office must seem like those final few months of high school.

Remember that when you got senioritis?

One of those rare intervals in life when, but I always wanted to, meets up with why the hell not?

And as president, that means doing some things just for fun now that it's the end, like, I don't know, legalize pot.

Put Beyoncé on the nickel.

Invite RuPaul to take a transgender leak in the Rose Garden.

Did I mention legalized pot?

Or at least move it to the schedule, move it off the Schedule One drug list and move it onto the You Can Buy It at Costco drug list.

Or do something really crazy and come on this show.

And then, as your final act, go on that apology world tour.

Why not?

Our government has already apologized internally for Indian genocide, to victims of Japanese internment and the Tuskegee experiments, and of course for the slave trade, that horrible period when it was legal to trade a black man for another black man without a first-round draft choice.

Go ahead.

Give the white people permission to laugh.

Go ahead.

Give permission.

Say, the black folks are laughing, you.

We're laughing.

Yeah.

Yeah, that's good.

A dozen presidents were slaveholders, and Thomas Jefferson wasn't just holding them.

Oh, America did some bad shit.

For much of our history, America acted like a nasty drunk, it's true.

And now we should do what AA tells recovering drunks they should do.

Make a list of people you hurt and go around and apologize to them.

Because drunks get drunk and do drunk-ass things.

Robert Downey Jr.

got so high he fell asleep in the wrong house.

Mel Gibson called a cop sugar tits.

Brittany Spears shaved her head.

David Hasselhoff, remember?

Starred in Baywatch.

Terrible stuff.

But going around.

But going around and apologizing does help.

So isn't it time America was at least as enlightened as Earl?

Remember my name is Earl?

Well, my name is Sam.

And first on my apology list is Vietnam.

Sorry, Vietnam.

America wanted to fight communism in the 60s, but fighting it over here might have made a mess, so we used your country.

Sorry.

And sorry, Mexico, for taking half your country just because we could.

And a big sorry to Iraq, our eternal drunken booty call.

When we invaded, you knew it wasn't really you we were mad at.

We were pretty badly hooked on oil at the time, and it made us do some crazy things.

Sorry.

And sorry to all the countries where we toppled the government and installed some stooge.

Guatemala, the Congo.

Iran, the Dominican Republic, Brazil, Chile, not to mention all the places where we supported dictators because, well, we were afraid of our own feelings and Stalin.

I wish there was some way we could make it up to you.

Is there someone we could bomb?

No, no, no, no.

What am I saying?

Bombing.

That's the old us.

Look, Trump's campaign, that's the last dying gasp of the old America, America's inner asshole, the macho screaming man baby.

But we're not that guy anymore.

We elected a thoughtful black president and now a woman.

We've come a long way.

If you don't believe me, just remember this.

LBJ used to shit with the door open.

Obama has to go outside just to smoke.

All right.

It's the first week of summer.

You know what that means.

Time to plug my annual New Year's Eve gig

in Honolulu at the Blazedel on New Year's night at the the Maui Arts Center in Maui, I want to thank Paul Magala, Betsy Woodruff, Michael Steele, Larry Will Moore, and Shoota Scott Martinez.

Join us now for overtime on YouTube.

Catch all new episodes of Real Time with Bill Maher every Friday night at 10, or watch him anytime on HBO On Demand.

For more information, log on to HBO.com.