Andrew's Answers // Rainbow Six with Ray [68]

Why are there ridges on Reese's peanut butter cups?

Probably so they never slip from her hands.

Can you imagine?

I'd lose it.

Luckily, Reese's thought about that.

Wonder what else they think about?

Probably chocolate and peanut butter.

Hello, and welcome to another episode of the Regulation Podcast.

This is number 68.

My name is Jeff Ramsey.

With me, as always, Eric Badur, Nick Schwartz, Andrew Pan, Gavin Free.

And boys, let me tell you.

I was here for the earliest of early pleasantries.

Eric is shot out of a cannon today.

He is fired up.

I came in fired up, boys.

He came in fired up.

Yeah, I actually came into Pleasantries and I

couldn't get a word in, obviously.

But Andrew showed up exactly at 11.

So I'm a bitch.

I'm Gavin style.

We call that.

He did that.

He did that shit yesterday, too.

That's two days straight.

That's two days in a row.

It is exhausting.

I got a lot going on over here.

I'm sleeping as much as I can whenever I can.

Had an issue with a cat this morning.

You had a cat issue?

Cage.

It like it sat in its litter box, I think, overnight and had shit all over its tail.

So

try to get it out.

You got a shit tail cat?

I had a shit tail cat this morning.

That's messed up.

Are you setting your alarm right now to wake up one minute before the podcast starts so you can maximize your sleep time?

I was so tired yesterday.

I went to bed at 9.30 p.m.

I was up at 4 a.m.

Then went back to bed at 5 and then woke up at 8.40.

But then laid back into bed with my eyes closed until, yeah, 10 minutes ago.

So do you feel good today?

I feel way better than I did yesterday.

Way more energy.

I was dreaming that I got murdered while getting a hot dog.

It was crazy.

Do you think you have an Eric amount of energy today?

I got an Eric amount of energy.

I don't know why.

Why does Eric have so much energy?

I know him.

I just fired out of his can.

Just feeling good.

I'm ready.

I'm ready for the show.

Yeah, I'm glad that we pushed this episode to today.

I'm ready to learn about my homework.

Oh, that's right.

We all had homework.

Definitely had homework.

And not to worry, I did mine and then some.

Can I ask you guys a question before we get to homework, though?

Of course, please.

Everybody here lives in some sort of a family unit now.

And so

is it common?

Let me ask it this way.

How many decorative napkin holders do your families have by chance?

Oh, like now, let me ask, like, right now, in the house that I'm in, yeah, right now, in the house that you're in, yeah.

Zero.

Zero.

Also, zero.

Okay.

I would say maybe like a four-pack Christmas set of some sort.

Of napkin holders?

Yeah.

Little, like, rings.

No, I mean, like, a container that holds napkins.

Oh, zero.

Oh, yeah.

Zero.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I

watched my wife unbox our second one last night, and I thought,

that seems excessive.

Which she

very, very quickly let me know that no, it is not excessive because there are two different size napkins.

There are rectangular napkins, which need to go in the rectangular decorative napkin holder, and then there are square napkins, which need to go in the square napkin holder.

Sure, you could put square in the rectangular, but it doesn't look right, and you can't put rectangular in the square.

So, if you want to have both square and rectangular napkins, which I am assured I do, then we need both decorative napkin holders and they're both on display right now.

I just thought that that was, it seemed like a lot to me, but I was, I was informed extremely quickly and with some force that I don't know what I'm talking about and that it is appropriate.

I would love to know what scenario you use which napkin.

Is it meal specific?

Is it event specific?

How do you know which napkin to use at which time?

Dude, I'll be fucking honest with you.

I got, I didn't want to get in any more trouble.

I backed off.

I was like, oh, yeah, no, no, yeah, of course.

We, we need, uh, you know, hold on, I'll show you.

Are we talking cloth napkins?

Uh, no, uh, here we go.

This is one of them.

The colors are different.

It's more of a tan color, but that's one.

That's the rectangular one.

And then this is the square one that I watched her open up last night where I was like, don't we already have one of those?

And that's when I was informed that they're very different.

These were painted by first-time painters, or these were this is a very, very popular style from a lady named McKinsey Childs.

It's what ladies love it.

It's the new Spode, it's the new Tiny Town.

Everything in my house has this checkerboarded pattern on it these days.

Every piece of kitchenware.

And let me ask you this: How much would you think?

We'll talk about first-time shops, the bottom one, just because I have the price up, and I'm not saying this is what my wife paid for it.

I just noticed there's a price on it.

How much would you think the little square tin one would cost?

$49.99.

I'll say $75.

$68 is what it looks like.

I mean, we can just like,

I'll just like poorly scribble some squares.

You want to give me like 50 bucks for that?

I'm pretty sure my wife got it for much cheaper because she was shopping a sale.

Yeah, I just got a text in all caps that said it was on sale.

So apparently my wife is home and I am digging

myself some sort of a hole that I thought she, I wouldn't fall into until next Wednesday when the podcast comes out.

Say how much she love the napkins.

Say how much you love them.

Yes, no, I love them.

I think it's great.

I think it's awesome.

I think it's all, I think it's, I think it's amazing.

I just, I wasn't aware that each, that every home needs at least two.

Can you buy, here's, here's a couple more if you want to grab them.

I think Vans makes these if you want to put some napkins in there.

Eric, Will, you can put tissues in them.

Yeah.

So see if, see if she's into that.

Tissue holder, tissue holder.

You want to blow your nose a shoe?

Uh-huh.

If they're fresh, sure.

Just for the record, I think my wife paid less than half on that on that uh thing not 68 was more than the 30 range just so just so she's because she got such a good deal because she's a crafty consumer

i just use uh i just use kitchen roll

that works yeah yeah we uh then you probably are gonna

then you're probably gonna want to watch uh want one of these the McKinsey Child's paper towel.

Oh, that's that.

That I'm into.

And you can play a little bit of chess around all these.

It's great.

Yeah.

Does she have anything for holding napkins that you take too many of at the fast food restaurant?

So that way you have napkins from the fast food restaurant and those are your regular napkins.

Is there a holder for that specifically?

Or do I just have to use one of these other ones?

I'm not sure that

I think those go in the shoe.

That goes in the shoe.

Yeah.

It was 30.

Yes, it was confirmed it was $35.

And

that's a fair price for that napkin holder.

All these items look like they belong to like a 1950s Marvel villain that's obsessed with chess.

Yeah.

Yeah.

They need to be ready at all like the chess master.

Chessington.

No, it's not even the chess master.

His name is Chester.

Oh, it's Chester.

I have a question.

If I got this pattern tattooed on my back, how much do you think I could charge people to play chess on it?

Oh,

yeah, yeah, probably.

So you could buy a bunch of the holders, you know?

Would you pay that?

Yeah.

I'd book a couple sessions with you

i wonder how long it would take for you to pay off the tattoo yeah oh how much the tattoos how much would that cost uh don't worry about it okay the the more it costs the better the tattoos so just expect it to cost a lot are you on full back gavin with this board uh

maybe this chessboard that looks like a peanuts character child drew it this pattern i mean i think i'd get a tighter grid it's dude the pattern is on everything

maybe a foot square.

Okay.

Okay.

Would that fit on my back?

Yeah, I think that would.

One foot?

That's a small chessboard.

Oh, you think it should be bigger?

Well, I don't have the back real estate that you do.

That's a good point.

You've got to start working out or you can get...

Yeah, you got to...

Maybe Andrew should be the one taking this over.

Look at all the things that lady has managed to put a checkerboard on.

You got to be kidding me.

There's a checkerboard squirrel.

There's a checkerboarded bulldog.

There's a checkerboard squirrel.

What does that mean?

I don't know what that means.

What the fuck?

Oh, it's a squirrel with a checkerboard patent.

Like it's a plushie type thing.

There's a checkerboard bulldog.

That doesn't really translate great to 3D, in my opinion.

I agree with you.

This doesn't make any sense.

Here's one.

Here's one.

It's a checkerboard owl sitting on a moon that smiles a hat.

Gull.

There's a second checkerboard squirrel.

All right.

We go get one of these for Eric.

There's two.

Eric's desk.

Checkerboard squirrel.

This is like, it's shit like this.

It's like,

it's on everything.

Gavin, Gavin, it's $100.

The checkerboard squirrel is $100.

Now, here's what you can do.

If you want to get a McKinsey Childs checkerboard squirrel, but you don't want to pay full McKinsey Childs prices for it, you let my wife know she's going to keep her eyes out.

When it goes on sale, she's going to snap it up immediately.

I promise you that.

This is the craziest shit I've ever

compound in upstate New York where you can go like tour their factory and buy their stuff.

And it's become like a mecca to my wife.

She wants to go so godly.

Parkham Asylum.

Isn't that what they have in Waco?

Don't they have Waco?

Like it's the other, it's like the other group or whatever.

The uh, oh, yeah, that's Magnolia.

That's uh,

yeah, that's uh,

uh, Joanna Gaines and Chip Gaines, right?

They fix up houses and sell home.

I guess shit like this, but this is just this.

This is just this lady finds stuff that she can sell that's porcelain that you can make a checkerboard on, Kevin, Kevin.

The frog's name is Dr.

Wacko.

Dr.

Wacka the frog,

Dr.

Wacka.

Dr.

Wacko is actually my neighbor in Goofworld.

He lives right across the street.

We're real close.

Just like the idea of Andrew coming out of his house.

Dr.

Wacko is always wanting the time change every year.

It's like Alice in Wonderland, the kitchen set.

It's like everything is so whimsical.

Andrew leaving his house in Goofworld.

Oh my God, I find a whimsy in this.

This is ridiculous.

I feel like if Andrew actually did live in Goofworld, living next to Dr.

Wacko,

he'd be like a Truman show-esque briefcase guy coming out of his front door every morning, saying hello to Dr.

Wacko.

Oh, no, Dr.

Wacko is

cutting his grass every day.

I don't know what's going on over there in two years.

He just does it every day.

There's nothing to cut.

Andrew just walks outside and Dr.

Rako goes, oh, hello, Andrew, my dear boy.

What the fuck,

greetings and salutations, my good man.

Just walks away, lawnmower still running.

They have their own slop o'clock.

God damn.

What the fuck?

Well, here's the thing.

No one's going to buy it, and then we have to sell it for a dollar, and then everyone goes, oh, I wish I had that.

Should we do the second run on a sloppy clock?

No, no one bought it.

Oh, no.

I don't want to make a thing at all that didn't

trick us again.

Yeah, maybe no one bought it because no one knew about it.

Oh, we did a whole thing.

There was related to the clock.

We did a lot with the slop o'clock.

We did a live stream for it i think i think we did a sloppy joe's night yeah but what time was the live stream i think it was sloppy o'clock slop o'clock

we did it at night because we had to get a we had to get like a director who was willing to stay and i think it was i think lindblad did it yeah and then we sold like four of them yeah then nobody yeah and they all went together and it was me jeff nick you like that's it we didn't sell any of these things maybe quarter past 11 isn't shopping hours so were you if we didn't do it at slop o'clock, were you going to say we should have done it at slop o'clock, but we did do it at slop o'clock.

So now you're trying to figure out the other way on.

That's definitely what's happened.

Yep, yep, yep, yep.

Okay, cool.

Can we talk about Andrew's homework?

Oh, that's a great idea.

And as we're moving on, can I just point out one last time that I think two napkin holders, decorative napkin holders, is the right amount for a home.

And I'm happy.

I'm happy that we have them because if I need a square napkin, I know where to go.

And if I need a rectangular napkin, I know where to go.

and aesthetically they're both so pleasing that it's improved the quality of my life materially and i just want to put that out into the universe and anybody that may be listening i'd love to know emily's thoughts on napkin rings

are there a lot of rings does she have a lot of napkin rings we have napkin rings yeah we gotta we gotta don't worry about that man so i want to make sure do not worry is this what i thought you were talking about initially with the napkins and storage or whatever yeah no no no i've never really felt the need to hold pre-used napkins i think they stack quite neatly in the plastic.

Yeah.

What about post-used?

Bin.

Bin?

Easy as that.

Wait for me.

There you go.

Open up that checkerboard bin with the checkerboard squirrel attached to it and throw those things away.

You're good to go.

But as we all live in a world where napkin holders are plentiful and loved and never derided, and it seems silly to keep talking about them when we have Andrew's homework to get to.

Would anyone like to go first?

What if we do it in the order we were given the homework?

Yeah, they were in numbers, right?

We did it in an egg order, but we skipped Nick.

Yeah, I did Eric and then we did Nick.

So Nick would be first.

Let's do it.

I was tired yesterday.

I did Eric and then I did Nick and so Nick goes first.

All right.

So my question was, who invented mini golf and where and when was it created?

Not one particular person is noted as having created it,

but I did find a couple of things about this.

In 1860 in St.

Andrews, a manager of the then-existing golf club set up a nine-hole putting course.

His name was Old Tom Morris.

And he apparently was an ideal terrain because it was intersected with a path that flooded fairly consistently.

But the first true mini golf course was designed by Englishman James Wells Barber.

who had immigrated to the U.S.

in 1916.

He teamed up with an amateur architect and landscape gardener to build a small golf course

on his estate.

It was in Pinehurst, North Carolina, called Thistledew.

D-H-U.

Thistledew.

And

I found out a little extra in that there was an article posted in Popular Science.

And you have pictures of the entire thing.

That's awesome.

It almost looks like a pinball machine.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Flippers at the bottom, it almost looks like.

And oh.

How do you become an amateur architect?

Is that just like a guy that wants to, in this scenario, build things later?

Hobby architect, hobby architect.

I build things for fun.

Yeah, exactly.

I don't get paid for this.

Listen, I'm just fascinated by building this.

This is so cool.

Nick, 10 out of 10 on the home.

Thank you.

Fantastic work, Nick.

Wow.

Thank you.

Kind of a suck up, too, but yeah, really good.

Yeah, I gotta go with Gavin.

Real brown nose here.

Yeah, I mean, just really.

Didn't you ask for extra credit?

Oh, you're getting extra credit.

Don't listen to that.

I think this is, I think you're getting responses from people that just used the Google AI answer at the top.

Didn't one of these two guys ask for extra homework?

That's true.

Eric did.

That was Eric.

No,

I didn't ask for extra homework.

I asked for the correct homework to be assigned.

Whatever you say, Dweeb.

Buried.

Okay, so I'm going next.

Gavin, pay attention.

Andrew's question to me.

Do geese have anything to do with gooseberries?

Oh, yeah.

Here's the thing.

Stocklin

is the German name for gooseberry.

Gooseberry is from a bush that is very thorny.

Stocklbiern is the term thornberry.

Gooseberry is simply because when they would cook a goose dinner, this would be the berry that they accompanied on the side cooked with the goose.

It's really a Nigel thornberry.

See, that's exactly what it is.

So the thing about gooseberries is that they are sometimes sweet, but mostly tart and sour by themselves.

But like Jeff told me earlier when before when we were doing pleasantries, when you add enough sugar to a fruit, it will make it sweet.

Then that is what happens with gooseberries.

You cook them down into a syrup, and

you can do you can brew with them to make a

homebrewed like gooseberry, like meat or wine.

It's not recommended and not very good.

The other important thing to know about gooseberries is that they are deadly to geese.

Oh, that is.

A gooseberry will kill a goose because of the hydrogen cyanide within the gooseberry, thus making the gooseberry the goose's ultimate enemy.

Goose kryptonite.

Nick is right.

Serving them together, insult to injury.

Absolutely.

This is crazy because I would have assumed.

I would have assumed the name would be in some way a positive related to the goose.

Somebody who loved the goose, loved geese,

but instead it is simply the thing that they would use to eat it.

Bam, we're eating all this goose.

This is really good.

What's with these berries?

Oh, my, oh, the gooseberries?

Absolutely.

Yes, the gooseberries.

Can you imagine not only

the insult of being cooked and eaten by a group of things, but for them to cook you with the thing you're most allergic to as well seems additionally insulting.

Yeah, it'd be like cooking and serving a human with a gun.

Yeah.

Oh, you want a scoop of human berries?

And it's just nine millimeters.

It's just bullets.

It's just a bunch of live rams.

You cook up with a person.

So there you go.

Cooked out Yosemite Sam's.

Just shots firing from the fire pit.

That's delicious there.

There you have it.

Also, if you weren't aware, gooseberries were actually once banned in the U.S.

Because they contributed to a tree-killing disease

called white pine blister rust that killed a bunch of trees, but now they're legal again.

Even with the name of the guy's first banned, white pine blister rust.

There you have it.

That's incredible.

This is great.

Great job, Eric.

Great job, Eric.

Remember that doctor's appointment?

That one you planned on booking, but then life got in the way?

Or that dental appointment you keep meaning to rebook since you canceled it before?

Why not book it today?

ZocDoc makes it easy to find the right doctor right now, and it's all online.

You probably could have it booked before this ad ends.

I don't know about you guys, but my social feed is filled with different health trends, like cottage cheese is an entire nutrition plan, or red light therapy can solve every skin problem.

I say we give these questionable trends a rest.

Turn to IRL healthcare professionals who can help you meet your health goals.

And with SockDoc, it's easy.

You can find doctors that are right for you and instantly book an appointment.

SockDoc is a free app and website where you can search and compare high-quality in-network doctors and click to instantly book an appointment.

We're talking about booking in-network appointments with more than 100,000 doctors across every specialty.

With a range like that, you know you'll be covered.

We're talking from mental health to dental health, primary care to urgent care, and more.

The range is incredible.

You can filter for doctors who take your insurance, are located nearby, are a good fit for any medical need you may have, and are highly rated by verified patients.

Once you find the right doctor, you can see their actual appointment openings.

Choose a time slot that works for you and click to instantly book a visit.

With easy filtering, you won't have to worry about finding the specifications you need.

And with ZocDoc appointments, they happen fast.

The last thing you want is a long wait, so typically within just 24 to 72 hours of booking, you can even score same-day appointments, which is so important.

If this was something something I needed, I'd use ZocDoc.

Stop putting off those doctor appointments and go to zocdoc.com slash regulation to find an instantly book a top-rated doctor today.

That's z-oc-d-oc-c.com slash regulation.

zocdoc.com slash regulation.

Hey, I'm here to talk about one of my favorite things, which is HelloFresh.

They're the parent company of Factor, which is another brand you may know.

What HelloFresh does is they send you chef-crafted recipes recipes and fresh ingredients directly to your home.

This summer, they made their biggest menu upgrade yet.

This isn't the HelloFresh you remember.

HelloFresh is bigger, healthier, and tastier than ever.

HelloFresh has doubled its menu.

Now you can choose from 100 options each week, including new seasonal dishes and recipes from around the world.

Dig into bigger portions that'll keep everyone satisfied.

And who doesn't love bigger portions?

Bigger portions always great.

You can feel great with an even healthier menu as well, which is also fantastic.

Who doesn't love a nice, delicious, healthy menu filled with high-protein and veggie-packed recipes?

HelloFresh now helps you eat greener with new veggie-packed recipes that have two or more veggies, including snap peas, stone fruit, corn on the cob, and more corn on the cob.

People like it.

Cats like it.

Everyone loves some corn on the cob.

I'm allergic to corn.

I love corn on the cob.

HelloFresh added more steak and seafood recipes at no extra cost.

That is more steak and seafood recipes at no extra cost.

Please help us thank HelloFresh for supporting Regulation Podcast.

You'll always find something to love from HelloFresh.

Get 10 free meals and a free item in every box at hellofresh.com/slash regulation 10 FM.

I love HelloFresh.

The recipes are always so delicious.

It's fun getting the box.

It's just a great experience, and I couldn't recommend it enough.

The best way to cook just got better.

Go to hellofresh.com/slash regulation10 FM now to get 10 free meals plus a free item for life.

One per box with active subscription, free meals applied as soon as discount on first box.

New subscribers only varies by plan.

That's hellofresh.com slash regulation 10 FM.

HelloFresh.com slash regulation 10 FM to get 10 free meals plus a free item for life.

Hey, before I go, do you guys know how when you they say if you if you taste pennies or copper or like you smell oranges, you're about to have a maybe a heart attack.

Uh-huh.

Uh-oh.

Or a stroke, whatever.

What if you smell prime rib really strongly?

Oh, then it's like me.

Like I just got the most overpowering for like the last like five minutes smell of prime rib in my office and I don't know where it could have come from.

Hold on.

You could smell the cut of meat?

Yeah.

You can't tell the difference between prime rib and other meat?

Not by smell.

Smells different.

Absolutely has a a different smell how really yeah so you could like sniff out a sirloin yeah oh i mean i couldn't tell the difference between like a new york strip and a ribeye or anything or a t-bone but i can definitely tell the difference between prime rib and other steak gavin had we've got a test large assumption that this is a a larger range than what you're saying I thought yeah, I thought you could sniff out the whole cow.

Every part of the steak.

No, no, I mean,

I could probably smell some differences, but there is a distinctive different smell to prime rib than other

you could have convinced him that you could smell the rarity of the meat.

I think you would have believed it.

I think you would have been like, Oh, we gotta test this.

Let's do this.

I think you can.

I think if you had dry-aged meat, you'd probably be able to tell from the cooking smell that it was dry-aged.

So, say the whole cow fell into lava and just cooked all at once.

Would that be like the best smell ever?

Because it's all the different cuts at once, probably, yeah.

You're spoiling the Minecraft sequel, Minecraft the movie.

Lava cow, lava cow is going to be the next big Spotify hit.

I bet it would smell really good.

Yeah.

I bet it'd smell great.

Unless, uh,

yeah.

Unless there's a lava smell that overpowers the steak smell.

Lava smelled me.

I hadn't thought about that.

What does lava smell like?

Like it, I would assume sulfur or something, you know?

I don't know.

Do they sell lava smell candles?

Lava scent?

Lava smell candle, right?

A lava scent?

What does lava smell like?

I'm assuming ash.

A combination of hot rocks and often a sulfurous acrid odor.

Smelling rock sulfur.

Yeah, people are saying sulfur.

Sulfur isn't.

I don't want that.

Just a volcano smells like a fart.

That sucks.

Yo, this volcano's gassy.

Definitely doesn't smell like a fart in my office.

Smells like prime rib.

Not sure why.

A little weirded out by it, but I do like the smell.

So I'm going to roll with it.

Wife Emily's cooking up a prime rib, so you stop talking shit about her napkin holders.

I would be pretty surprised and delighted.

And if I, now, if I go downstairs and there's not a prime rib in the oven, I'm going to be sad.

Andrew, I would like to turn in my homework if you would not mind.

Please,

just to refresh your memory and everybody else's who asked, Andrew asked me to look into who invented the peanut butter and jelly sandwich and when was it?

I can answer that.

Luckily, it is in print the first time it is ever mentioned in a 1901 magazine

called

the boston cooking school magazine it was published by julia davis chandler it was listed as a tea sandwich or a finger sandwich combining peanut paste which is the earliest version of peanut butter they would make peanut paste sounds brutal they would take roasted peanuts and they would stick them in a coffee grinder and just fucking run them through the coffee grinder until they turned into kind of a paste so they hadn't refined the recipe yet.

It was, it was not the peanut butter that we're thinking of today.

It's pretty strong peanut flavor, as I understand it.

And then they would use what's called Pullman loaves.

That's the kind of bread.

This is, by the way, before sliced bread.

So they would make these loaves called Pullman loaves, which were really good for sandwiches because they were a thick, spongy bread that was very soft.

And so moisture wouldn't seep through it.

There weren't like a lot of holes for stuff to fall through.

So they used a slice of Pullman bread, like a finger slice of Pullman bread, and then a little bit of peanut paste, then another slice of Pullman bread.

And on top of that second slice of Pullman bread, they would do a smear of currant or crab apple jelly, and then a third slice of bread on top of that.

So it's actually like a Big Mac.

There's three slices or like a club, which is way too much bread, I think.

And that is the original initial.

peanut butter and jelly sandwich, which she claimed to have invented in that magazine.

She said she was the, it was an original recipe.

At that point, peanut paste had only been used for about five years.

So it was relatively new.

So it stands to reason that nobody had thought to combine it with jelly until that point.

Crab apple jelly and currant jelly are both very difficult to get.

Pullman bread, you can just bake.

I watched a dude do it online on YouTube.

I'm thinking we should build the original.

peanut butter and jelly sandwich at some point and see what that's a great idea i actually i watched two different dudes on youtube do it uh and it's it's totally doable and totally possible.

We just have to make this Pullman bread.

The thing that I found, I thought was most interesting about this, genuinely the most interesting about this whole deal, right?

Is that the peanut butter and jelly sandwich didn't really take off at first because people didn't like to make finger foods and

that quickly people didn't like to slice bread.

Apparently slicing bread was a really big thing.

You know the phrase, it's the greatest invention since sliced bread that we still use to this day?

I didn't realize how how big of a fucking deal pre-sliced bread was.

It was invented in like the early 1930s.

So I think maybe a little bit earlier than that, but it was years and years and years after the peanut butter and jelly sandwich was invented.

It didn't take off until pre-sliced bread took off because they thought it was a gimmick at first that nobody was going to use it.

Because when you slice bread, the bread goes bad quickly.

So they're like, why would you want to slice up a bunch of bread that's just going to go bad faster?

But what it did is it just encouraged people to eat sandwiches like a motherfucker.

And in that process, where people were like, I can eat sandwiches like crazy or my bread's going to go bad.

And people did not let stuff go to waste back then, right?

So it was like, what's the easiest sandwich I can make?

Peanut butter and jelly.

And they just started going to town on peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.

Also, soldiers ate a lot of peanut butter in World War I because it was considered a good meat substitute when meat was hard to come by.

Last thing about this, and the thing that I think is the absolute funniest, when sliced bread was invented, it was a phrase, it became a phrase, greatest thing since sliced bread.

They said sliced bread was the greatest thing, it was referred to when it was invented as, this is the greatest thing in the baking industry since bread was wrapped.

So before we had

the sliced bread as a marker, there was wrapped bread as a marker.

So sliced bread knocked wrapped bread off the pedestal.

And if we'd never invented sliced bread, we might be running around saying, this is the greatest thing since wrapped bread.

I'm going to start saying that.

Sliced bread kicked wrapped bread's ass.

Nobody's talking about wrap bread anymore.

These seem like such basic things, it's crazy to think of them as revolutionary.

Wrapping bread?

I don't.

Am I missing something with the term wrapped bread?

Like, what's, what do you, what do you mean?

Like, they put it in something?

Yeah, they just put it in, like, a plastic bag.

They probably discovered that it doesn't go stale as fast.

It doesn't go stale as fast if it's wrapped and all the airs pushed out.

Guys, we got to put this bread in something.

Holy shit.

Well, I've just been leaving it out.

Yeah, but if you didn't understand the way staleness works, how would you ever figure that out?

Yeah.

Good point.

But doesn't it feel like you would know just by being alive?

No, like if I buy ice cream?

If I buy an ice cream cone, I don't wrap it up.

What?

What?

Why?

I'm right there with Gavin, but this might be the worst example I've ever heard in my entire life.

I do think

these things are like common sense to us because they've been a part of the fabric of our reality for a hundred years since before we were born.

But somebody had to be the first person to try everything, right?

So somebody was like, maybe it's the air that's making bread go stale.

What if I stick it in a bag and suck all the air out?

Oh man, it lasted an extra week.

Crazy.

It would have been experimental or an accident, I assume.

Yeah.

Do grocery stores exist at this point?

Like, what is the culture of that?

In my head, it's like people are buying from vendors.

You buy from a baker, I assume.

Yeah, like a bakery type situation.

The concept of, like, I'm not, I don't think they're shopping at Walmart.

Like, the idea like so i got an answer for you the first grocery store modern self-service grocery store was piggly wiggly and it was founded in memphis tennessee in 1916 so prior to 1916 grocery shopping involved customers providing a list of groceries to a clerk who would then go behind the scenes and get them and bring them so there was like there was a grocery store in the sense that you would just bring somebody a shopping list and they would shop for you.

I mean, consider the name supermarket, right?

Like it's just just the market that you would go to to get these things, but it's all everything in one place.

And then,

yeah, you just do it.

That's supermarket.

And then the supermarket showed up and it became the greatest thing since wrapped bread.

Really big fan of Supermarket Brothers.

Supermarket Brothers, great game.

Might be on the list.

Might be on the list.

Oh, anyway, that's my homework, Andrew.

And I got to say,

thank you for giving it to me because I think you've given me an entire episode of Saul, right, On the road, whenever I need to break in case of emergency, I can just reiterate all this crap.

But it was also wildly entertaining.

I learned so much more than this.

It just like it, I went deep into the bread.

I went deep into jellies.

I went deep into the history of the peanut, how it used to be called a goober, just all kinds of stuff.

I would have never guessed that crab apple was the initial jelly.

Crab apple or currant, but it seemed like crab apple was the preferred.

And I would really like to try crab apple jelly, which I'm assured by Eric tastes good good because of sugar.

Sure.

Interesting.

Huh.

Well, that leaves Gavin.

Pancakes.

It was pancakes.

Oh, pancakes is first.

Yeah.

That's what I assume because waffle is fancier.

There you have it.

That's the end of that segment.

So pancakes, you said not to show my workings, so yeah, there you go.

Where were they created?

Oh, you do want my workings?

I was just, I was curious.

It was more of a question.

I mean, I'm not asking you to show your work.

It was just like a follow-up.

Oh, no idea.

Okay.

That's what I would have assumed because a waffle just, as I said, feels more complex and fancy.

It's a complex shape in it.

There's no way you could do that with.

I mean, a pan is like, everyone's got a pan.

Yeah, there's it, and it also just seems like an evolution of like holding the stuff you would spread on it better.

It felt like something that would have come after pancake.

What I thought would be cool was a pan that has the waffle texture, so you could potentially have a half-waffle, half-pancake without any equipment.

Interesting.

So it's specifically a pancake pan because, like, what else could you make on that?

You can make an a waffle-shaped fried egg.

You could make a waffle-shaped.

I guess any liquid-type thing that you pour into a pan could work.

Just be waffle-shaped.

It'd be what I'm saying.

I'm imagining.

And you flip it over and it's a pancake.

I wonder, like, if you tried to grill a piece of chicken on that,

would it have the waffle checker?

Oh, I don't know.

If it's not fried, Andrew, I'm going to go crazy.

I appreciate the information.

That's confirmation.

That's where I would have guessed.

If I had to guess, if it was like a millionaire situation and I had to pick 50-50, I would have leaned pancake.

What an interesting amount of knowledge you've gained.

I enjoyed it.

That was great.

Andrew, do you want some new knowledge?

Please.

I beat one of your scores in Trials HD.

You know what?

I saw you do it and I forgot.

That's unfortunate.

I saw you playing Trials HD one day and I went, oh, he's getting one of my times.

I'll, I'll get it back before

he brings it up, whenever he brings it up.

And then I forgot because of life.

Life happens.

You know, you got the cats, you got the shit tail.

So I'm not completely caught off guard by this.

I saw it coming, but I forgot.

So I guess I'm like double.

I'm re-surprised.

What trials time did you beat?

Level six on the first game.

Level six, first game.

Or five?

I don't know.

One of the end ones, because we went back and forth too many times on the early ones, or I just can't beat your times.

And this was the only one doable.

Well, that was the one that you really mastered back at home.

I need to install trials HD.

I'm surprised you revisited this one, because last time we did this, you complained about how unbearably ugly you thought it was.

It's ugly.

I only started doing it because we had the 360s in the office for a video, and it was just on that 360.

and I just thought, ah, I'll play that.

Wait, so the 360 you brought in that was an old 360 you had, and it just still had stuff on it.

From yeah, they all were.

Yeah, oh, that's awesome.

We brought in six 360s to make four, I think.

You guys said there were like a lot of problems with them, huh?

Oh, yeah, we had a lot of fun trying to recreate that recording environment.

Took about two days,

and you read Rings of Death unexpectedly, yeah, two.

Well, one of Jeff's Xbox 360s has the fan that doesn't spin.

So

it turns on for about four minutes and then goes red.

Anytime you try to do anything, yeah.

By the time this is out, we can talk about that gameplay.

If you guys want to talk about it at all.

You want to talk about it?

Okay, or not, I guess.

Yeah.

Yeah, no, I think it's a great idea.

I was just, I was

actually going through some notes when you talked.

I'm very happy to talk about it.

It was the culmination of something that we have been planning since we started the Let's Play channel back at face.

Or restarted the Let's Play Channel at Face, I guess.

We

actually set up and started to test the environment way, way, way back at the Rooster Teeth offices.

before we, you know, got shit canned.

And then,

you know, they nuked us from orbit and so we couldn't do it but then when we started the new company about a year later we were able to do it again we and something that we gavin and i had been wanting to revisit for a very long time rainbow six vegas 2 which was a very popular let's play series way back in the achievement hunter days four-player co-op in this game type called terrorist hunt where basically you go in to a building and then you try to kill 40 or 50 terrorists that are occupying it it's and you play it on the hardest mode but the really cool thing about it is with the Xbox 360 Vision Pro camera, which is one of the biggest pieces of shit ever, you can scan your face and then apply your face to the game character model so that you're actually in the game, which we did to hilarious results way back in the AH days.

So we

dug, we dug all of our 360s out of the garages and we put them together and we played a couple of rounds of Terrace Hunt with Ray.

And it was so much fun.

What a great time.

What a fun game.

What just a fun thing to play.

The only issue I had with it was what I talked about before.

I had to try to scan my face using that camera, and it took me about an hour.

And I was wearing my mask of my face during it.

It was just squishing my cheeks.

I was so miserable.

I put it on, I did the photos, and then I took it off, and I was like, okay, it's processing.

It's going to be great.

Then it said it failed.

And then I just put it back on.

And I tried for as long as I could until I physically could no longer bear my face being squished and i took off the mask but i am happy with how my thing ended up turning out yours was phenomenal yeah you had four eyes somehow yeah i don't know how i got the additional eyes but 40 40 vision i'm watching all corners i'm ready to take out them terrorists it was so easy just to drop back into that mode of playing games with ray I was amazed because I, I mean, I know we did the one let's play when he came back at the Olympic one, but how long had it been since we've, we'd like done a let's play with Ray in earnest?

Uh, 10 years.

10 years or so?

It was like, it was, it really was like it had been yesterday.

It was like we just slipped back in so quickly and so easily.

And it was so much, it was seamless and it was so much fucking fun.

It was like zero time had passed.

It was really hard.

I know what you're saying.

It wasn't seamless.

We spent about 50 minutes trying to get it to work.

Listen,

that's the achievement hunter hump.

You got to get over.

We had too many achievement hunter people in the room together, so we had an hour of tech problems leading up to it.

Even though Gavin and I spent two fucking days trying to prep this thing, it wasn't our problem.

It was all on Ray's end.

But once we got that sorted and we were playing, from that point on, it was fucking smooth sailing.

I mean, one of the big problems with

on a modern Xbox, you just sign into your account and then bloop, you've got it.

On the 360, for some reason, it has to like download your gamer score.

So the more gamer score you have, the longer it takes.

And

Ray's probably couldn't take longer.

Yeah, Ray's had two and a half million gamer score, so it took two and a half million hours.

Well, he tried to circumvent that, right?

And actually, the whole thing was he wanted to, he changed his gamer tag years ago, but when he worked at Achievement Hunter, his gamer tag was Brown Man.

So he thought it would be funny to have the same gamertag.

Instead of paying the money to read, you know, to change his name, he just created a, or he had an alt account that he had that name on that he had switched it over to.

So he brought that account in, and it took us 40 minutes of trying to get him into the game with all of us to realize that that account didn't have Xbox Live Gold, which you can no longer buy on the 360.

And we couldn't figure out how to get it on the Xbox One through that account.

So he ended up just logging in through his normal account, which took two and a half million hours.

You can see in this picture here that Tina and I are being the lightning crew for Race Picture because their office is so dingy and shitty.

Nick is loving it.

If you look at look in the background, you can see Nick loving it.

Ray is getting

flashlights in his face.

It's so funny.

It was so good, man.

It was awesome.

But yeah,

hopefully people like it.

Hopefully people enjoyed the nostalgia.

They enjoyed us playing games with Ray.

I wouldn't look for that to happen again anytime soon, but you could see more of that stuff in the future.

I think we all had so much fun that we wouldn't mind doing some more of that kind of in the,

you know, not too distant to distant future, completely undefined, no expectations.

Absolutely.

But, you know.

And we recorded two of them.

So it'll be two videos.

Yeah, two videos.

There you go.

Which is two more than zero.

That is two more than zero.

I didn't even need to send you to do that homework.

You just knew that, Jeff.

You just nailed that one.

You know why?

It's because you've got me thinking scholastically lately.

Got that knowledge just shooting from the hip.

That's true.

The same amount of bullets as Vidius that we made.

i figured out a new way to start threatening gavin which i'm pretty into is it deleting files that he doesn't know were deleted no no no no oh blain blain got to hear all about that last night huh that was pretty exciting i played i played battlefield with blain oh how was it and i was telling him about the podcast we just recorded

how how how was battlefield with blain that's fun i don't really i don't really have a like one-on-one hangout with blain so i liked it it was nice nice nice uh i have discovered that

through the magic magic of TikTok, all of these pranks that people play on each other, and now I just send them to Gavin and I go, this is what I would have done to you if I knew about this when I was younger.

Or if I could build a time machine, I'd do this to you yesterday.

You sent me a video.

You sent me a video of some guy just like pissing at a shrub and then another guy just tackling him into his own piss.

And

I'm just so glad it didn't happen to me.

But I still feel like that feeling of like, oh, what if that was me?

I saw that video and I thought, I've never wanted to do something to Gavin more in my entire life, but obviously I'm too old to be throwing people in bushes.

This is an idea.

This is a time machine idea, but I wanted him to know that I wanted him to feel that I would do it to him anyway.

So I just sitting in these now and I'm just going like, this would have been you.

This could have been you.

This should have been you.

I think it was Bernie once while I was pissing in one of those trough urinals.

He just kicked me in the butt.

He just like shoved me in the butt while I was pissing.

And I flew forwards and I was really worried about my head hitting the wall so i leant back and my cock absolutely wanged the like the metal back of this urino

classic birdie

that dude loves to mess with a dude's butt in a public bathroom god damn

oh man so wait i i thought the threat would be that you're sending him videos to tick tock that he can't even view he doesn't even know it's happening because he complains about that.

That because Gavin doesn't have it.

No, I like to make him do the work to actually watch the video.

And then I verify that he did watch the video later.

I've actually stepped up sending him TikToks.

Yeah, so I have to like

pull the video over to the middle because it starts on the side in the browser.

And then I have to try and hit the tiny speaker button, which starts on mute.

And then I have to...

Try and get the volume up without like switching the video and then I have to slide the video back to where I can see it.

Or he could just get TikTok.

I could do that.

Yeah,

it would make it easier.

Although it's about to get banned, right?

Or not banned, it feels like

it's constantly impending.

Or there's going to be an American-only TikTok now or something.

Who fucking knows?

Who cares?

Nothing's real anyway.

Everything is fake.

Everything.

Do you guys ever think about how, I know we're out of our hot dog era.

Uh-huh.

And I'm happy to be out of that.

I'm ready for my hot dog break.

Yeah.

But do you guys ever think about how we eat hot dogs the long way and not the top-down way?

No.

I was thinking about that the other day.

I was watching somebody eat it, I was watching somebody eat an ear of corn, and I thought, why don't we eat hot dogs like that?

You can eat the middle of it.

Yeah, if the hot dog had a solid core,

like the meat stem, I'm sure you would eat it.

Well, I'm not saying you should spin it, but you could just go down that direction, you know?

Why start at the dick end?

Why not just go down the shaft?

I'm trying to think of any long food that you eat.

Yeah.

Have you ever seen this image?

It's a fake thing or whatever this guy just made to see if he could get it published in People Magazine and stuff.

And it worked.

It's a guy dressed like Justin Bieber eating a burrito sideways.

It's the craziest.

I never thought about eating a burrito the short way.

It is

really impressive to see.

Kind of want to do that with a hot dog.

Yeah, I think we should do it.

We should have a, we should have a hot dog eating contest where you have to eat it that way.

Oh, absolutely.

I love this idea.

I'm a kid.

kid, so am I going to surprise you with a poster board I need for the science fair tomorrow?

Probably.

But can you get up to 40% off back to school essentials on Uber Eats?

Definitely.

So order on Uber Eats and get up to 40% off.

Exclusions May Apply.

Check app for availability.

When did making plans get this complicated?

It's time to streamline with WhatsApp.

The secure messaging app that brings the whole group together.

Use polls to settle dinner plans.

Send event invites and pin messages so no one forgets mom's 60th.

And never miss a meme or milestone.

All protected with end-to-end encryption.

It's time for WhatsApp.

Message privately with everyone.

Learn more at whatsapp.com.

Someone on, I feel like I ventured into the subreddit yesterday and there's so many good Gerpla pictures.

There's like a picture of a baby drinking out of a Gerpler, which made me laugh for some reason.

But I also saw someone wrote about my emotional poos and someone was saying that they also have like a runny nose and tears coming out of their eyes during some poos.

And it's called Defecation Rhinorrhea.

It's got a real name.

Defecation diarrhea.

I think you misread it.

No.

Diarrhea.

You said defecation Rhiner Maria?

Rhino Rhinoria.

Reiner Maria.

Emotional singing?

Whoa.

Isn't Reiner Maria a poet from Germany?

Didn't he write write the leopard?

Is that what it is?

Rhino defecation rhinoria, also known as poop nose.

Yeah, you definitely got it.

Kevin doesn't have to be a good idea.

Dude, you get fucking poop nose?

Poop nose is very misleading.

I don't have poop nose.

I don't know.

I don't want to be turned here.

It sounds like you do.

It sounds like you've got a burning case of poop nose.

I'm reading right here that says you have poop nose, bro.

That's a real bummer.

So have you always been a poop noser, or like when did this start?

What was your first poop nose?

When did you get poop nose?

Since I was a kid.

Poop nose.

Oh, interesting.

You've been a poop nose since a child?

Man, I wish it was new nickname time already.

I don't think we can give him a nickname of what he just is.

Or I guess we could.

Yeah.

Poop nose.

Or it's like, you know how

you give an opposite nickname, right?

Like, you call a big guy tiny.

Maybe we should call him not poop nose.

Yeah, it was a Smurf.

He'd be Poopy Smurf.

If all of our nicknames were based on a trait, I think Poopnose is fine.

Like, you could be long back, Andrew.

I'd much rather be long back than Poopnose.

Do you think Poopnose is fine?

And then the other one is long back?

Yeah.

Well, I mean, Jason used to be poop, didn't he?

He hated that, man.

Poopy, poopy, poop.

Yeah, he did that to himself.

He fucking hated that.

I'll still sometimes pull out my camera and do a video where I'm like, I met poop from Red vs.

Blue.

I'll never forget at a show at Emo's one night introducing Jason to a cool girl.

She's kind of hot.

I said, this is my friend Jason.

We call him Poop.

And she goes, oh, that's sad.

And he goes, goes, hey.

That's sad.

He goes, oh, that's sad.

And it's all because he

played some game as Pooh Pooh or something.

He played his, he played,

fuck, was it?

Yeah, I can't remember what game it was.

Quake.

It was Quake, I think.

And his name was Poopy or Pooh Pooh.

And so we just called him Poop after that.

It really is on him.

Yeah, it's like when you said it was on him, there was a thought of like, I don't know how much it really was on him.

No, but that's on him.

It really stuck, though.

It was such a great forum name.

Like, every all the cast of Red vs.

Blue had their old handles on the forum.

So it's like Busby and G-Funk and Poop.

And you'd be like, who are all these people?

And

Gus.

And Gus.

Yeah, yeah, that's that tracks.

That sounds right.

Yeah.

Oh, goddamn.

Gavin

really made me laugh last night and has changed how I've viewed movies in a certain way.

We were talking about the new Alien TV series just came out, the first two episodes.

Andrew got me to watch it.

I'd asked if he had seen it because I saw it.

I really enjoyed it.

And

I said there's more Ray Romano in it than you'd expect, thinking that he would think that I was telling a joke.

And then he came back because Ice Age is a weirdly significant part of the story, the movie Ice Age.

So Dennis Leary and Ray Romano technically are in the Alien TV series that just came out.

And he brought up that Sigourney Weaver's character, an alien, has an awareness of Ray Romano.

It's established in the universe.

Which then made me think about the fact that Sigourney Weaver and Alien knew about Ray Romano before any of us did.

Which has broken my brain.

I thought that was brilliant.

Every time I watch Alien now, I'm going to be like, oh, she's seen Ice Age.

She's seen Ice Age.

Also, I just love the idiot because I was the perfect age for Ice Age.

And maybe it's a Spongebob thing where I just am the weird kid that it didn't register with.

I never liked Ice Age.

I thought Ice Age always kind of sucked.

So the premise that it is like a beloved movie still in the year 21, whatever, is insane to me.

I never saw it.

Didn't think it was that great.

It is

going to be.

I was just gonna say that I actively remember being disappointed by Ice Age as a child.

I was so pumped.

It might be the first disappointment.

It was my tuxedo.

That's the one where that little dude's running for the nut the whole time, right?

Yeah, he's in it.

He's like the minion.

He's like a pre-minion, essentially.

Yeah, he's like a little squirrel.

Yeah, he's yeah, he's like the lemur of Ice Age.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It is going to be funny.

Like, if you look at like, we've talked about this before, but the entirety of our lifespan from when I'm born to the last one of us dies right there's probably going to be like four animated movies in that window that exist past us and it is going to be fucking weird that it's going to be like why is ice age one of those movies or like why did the aristocats end up resurfacing becoming a thing and not little mermaid or wait it's it's it's it's so weird how history and humanity picks the things that endure you know That would be an interesting if like post-life you could get information to questions about the future.

I'd love to know what what property that nobody gave a shit about eventually becomes the biggest deal in the world.

Because you're right, it absolutely is going to happen to something.

Or to be able to go back in time and say, like, okay, so we're looking back 100 years ago.

It was all like Buster Keaton, right?

Like, he was like the, he was the driving force.

People are like, no, he's a hack.

We liked Bill Johnson.

I don't know why everybody, why are you guys so obsessed with Buster Keaton?

Nobody liked him when he was alive.

Now, that's not true.

But, you know, there's got to be stuff like that that's already happened that, you know, we're super into like Hollywood Boulevard, but everybody else is at that time like the different movie you know i do get fascinated by uh

things that culturally are so important or like just so in your face i i'm refraining from saying important because my example is certainly not important but william hung means something to people of a very specific age and time and not at all to anyone else outside of it yeah but like was so present like the people that are so i hoctua will be that uh for some.

Susan Boyle.

Susan Boyle.

Another one.

Yeah.

Well, Susan Boyle, special place in my heart because of

Andrew Pan.

Her vocal coach being Andrew Panton.

But yes.

And it's interesting.

I guess like the modernized version of that are people that are memes that don't intend to be.

Oh, yeah.

It's definitely that.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's the memes that keep going.

And then you go, remember, remember Potato Chip Kid?

And this is him now.

And it's like him in jail and you go like oh poor potato chip kid that's sad

that's sad the rizzler is the only one i'm genuinely fascinated by i've seen like what does the ristler look like in 10 years and i feel like he's going to be fine yeah i think i think the rizzler is just going to keep looking like this forever i don't think there's any this is it man i think the rizzler is going to age like andy milanakis aged Yeah,

yeah.

That's actually, I think, a great comparable.

Yeah.

Because he seems unfazed by all of this.

Like, to him, I think nothing has really changed in his mind.

When you search the Rizzler, that's the first picture.

That's the worst picture of the Rizzler I've ever seen.

Dude, that could be him at nine or 49.

They keep making him, dude.

I love looking at the Rizzler in other situations.

They keep making him go on red carpets.

It's so crazy.

The fucking Rizzler.

Oh, God, I love it.

I love it so much.

I love nothing about what this kid does, but saying the Rizzler makes me feel good.

I love saying the Rizzler.

I enjoy that.

The name is a killer.

It's an absolute stone-cold killer.

Yep.

Yep.

Damn.

You big Rizzler head, Gavin?

I don't know anything about the Rizzler.

He's not on TikTok, so I feel like...

Chalk a chalk a cookie.

Those are his friends.

The Rizzler doesn't say that.

Those are his friends.

Those are...

Here's the Rizzler.

Friends of Rizzler.

His two Italian friends.

I went to a pro wrestling show in Arlington at Rangers Stadium, and the Rizzler was there.

And he came out in a cowboy hat.

It was pretty exciting.

Just keep looking at him.

I've got a life hack.

You have a life hack?

What's the life hack?

Well, it may seem convenient, right, to buy a printer that has a scanner on top.

But don't buy a separate scanner.

Because when your printer has a problem with his ink or doesn't have its ink, any ink, because it's 2025, the scanner doesn't work now.

So buy a separate scanner.

Or buy a separate printer and have double the ink.

When your printer doesn't work, you use your other printer.

Oh, that's...

I mean, nothing is less reliable than a printer you rarely use, though.

I feel like if I have two printers.

Are you...

Wait.

So your life hack is just buy a second thing?

My life hackers don't buy the combination because of shitty dog shit ink DRM.

I can't scan anymore.

I can't scan.

I mean, that sounds like a real annoyance.

I'm calling bullshit on this life hack.

For the amount of shit you gave me for my McDonald's life hack, my life hack was significantly better than this nonsense.

Yours is just buy a different thing.

It's not a life hack.

Yeah, but

I'm trying to save you money on

buying.

I was trying to save people money by getting more food at a cheaper price, and that was apparently shit, but printing is fine.

I would say that the real life hack here to me is that you're reminding me and probably most people that there's a scanner on every printer in America that I've never used.

Oh, I use it all the time.

I could probably use it.

I'm disappointed with how often I have to scan something.

It really annoys me.

I just take a photo of any document or anything and I just mail that to email that to them.

Nobody's ever rejected it.

Some people are like, oh, you need to actually use a scanner though.

And then I'll be like, look, I did, even though it was taken on my phone with like the notes app.

And they're like, we could see the shadow of the phone.

It's like, oh, sort of a bitch.

Well, that's better lighting.

I think we're just doing different kinds of business.

I think so.

Yeah, yeah, I think Gavin is doing legitimate business.

Yeah, no, obviously.

I think we're doing different kinds.

Yeah, right.

What kind of business are you doing, Nick?

Oh, Nick's in the middle of money.

Oh, business.

Nick is in the middle of so much business that he fucking hates.

It's so

much business.

So much business.

So much business.

Sign this, send it back.

Now we have it.

Now you have it.

Now sign it again and send it back.

Oh, this has to be a good idea.

That quote was only good for 12 hours.

We need to generate a new quote.

We'll need to get you to sign that.

Why'd you send this this?

You shouldn't send it that.

Don't send that.

Send this.

Send this other one.

It should have been notarized.

Oh, you actually didn't.

You forgot to initial.

initial send it back sign it and send it back oh cool thank you so much this needs a witness i think online notaries are the best it's so weird to like have someone perv on you while you're signing something wait that's a thing oh yeah what you just have someone watch you on webcam oh that's so creepy yeah

what's the point why do i need to do that sometimes to prove it i can't

gavin gavin do you want me to become a notary for you uh it seems like annoying everyone I've known who is also a notary seems quite inconvenienced when you ask them to do stuff.

Dude, my mom is a notary.

She'd jump at the chance to help you, I'm sure.

Don't make me notarize.

Some people really want to use the notary ability.

It's like when you're playing an RPG and you have like a character-specific voice or a text prompt.

You just really want to use that instead of a generic one.

Sure.

Yeah, sure.

But I think if this was just a notary for friends only, like, how do you, what does it take to become a notary?

Yeah, you just have to like sign up for some stuff.

And I think there's like a class or something you probably just take online.

I think it takes like two weeks.

Once again, I can ask my mom.

She's, she's a notary.

Can you notarize your own stuff?

No.

I don't think you can.

I think that's completely focused.

That's like the one thing.

Yeah, it's like the one thing you can't do.

Oh, what if I

sign something and look at myself in a mirror?

Like outside where you shave?

I guess you could do that.

Yeah.

That could work.

Yeah, uh, yeah.

I really can't see shit in that mirror anymore.

Oh, no.

Is that why you got the beard going so much right now?

Part of the reason.

You need to get a new mirror.

You need to get a new exterior mirror.

Yeah, you need Meg to drop a mirror soon, so that way you have a new mirror outside.

Yeah, I mean, I didn't buy it as an outdoor mirror.

No, but I'm just saying you should.

You should get one.

It's become part of your lifestyle.

Yeah.

Did it break and become an outdoor mirror, or was it an outdoor mirror that broke?

No.

It was a mirror that broke, and then I just left it outside because I wasn't sure about how to throw it away without.

Right, right.

And then he started ape shaving in front of it.

Yeah, more of a slab squat.

Meg broke a mirror expecting bad luck to come, but instead it was just Gavin started shaving outside.

That was the consequence.

Do you ever clean the mirror or you just leave it to like the elements?

I just leave it.

Okay.

That's probably why you can't see it.

Yeah, you should probably spray it with like a hose.

Yeah.

No, it's like the reflective material under the glass is all fogged.

The mirror?

This man came in here with a life hack about printers and he can't even shave because his exterior mirror.

Get him, Andrew.

Get him.

What would the life hack be for a better outdoor shaving experience?

Buy an outdoor mirror.

It'd shave inside

or a phone holder.

Life hack, shave inside.

Yes.

There you have it.

Too much hair.

Clogs up all the.

I'm just saying there's two people that I know that shave outside.

It's you and it's Chris Damaris.

And if that's the company I have to keep to do that, I'm not sure about it.

Have you considered a shed?

That's where Chris shaves.

Shave shed?

Chris has a shave shed.

Yes, he does.

Chris brings power tools to his shed.

So it looks like he's going it for a reason.

Who's watching it?

Chris going in his shave.

Is someone notarizing his shave?

Like, why is he worried about it?

No.

I think Chris thinks that people are watching him all the time, except

then you see him act a certain way and you go, I just don't know if he thinks that anyone looks at him ever.

Like you've seen him run where he puts like his arms like to his side and just runs as fast as he can.

It's crazy.

He's just an interesting guy.

Well, I feel like you're all shitting on shaving outside.

Have you ever tried it?

No, should I give it a shot?

I used to shave outside at the old house all the time it's awesome i got no issue with shaving outside i think it's dumb to shave into a broken jagged mirror that you can't see out of

i throw my trimmings outside what no shaving outside is way better because it makes such a mess in your bathroom you got to clean out hair for the for a half an hour i did it this morning it's the worst I'm like, I'm not a hairy guy at all.

So like, I just don't think I have the same issue that you guys have.

Oh, dude.

I shaved my neck today and it looked like,

Eric, it looked like a temperate rainforest in my bathroom.

It was just like

fur and hair everywhere.

I'm convinced, Eric, if I just walked around your house

and shaved various amounts of beard in different sinks, I could block every sink you have.

That's one shade.

I do not have, I like, don't have this problem at all.

Yeah, I don't, I don't have that.

I have like zero body hair, like at all.

And then like my facial hair, you've seen it.

That's it.

It does not grow.

That's it.

Full stash, though.

Thanks, man.

That takes like three months, like a quarter of a year to get it like looking okay.

It's a good problem to have.

I wouldn't even call it a problem.

I'm fine.

I got no issue with it.

I'm not looking to be a hairy guy.

I just, you know, a little chest hair would be probably okay.

You know, I wonder what percentage of people would, like, if it was a box you could check to decide how many people are picking hairy

Harry guy.

I'm certainly not.

Yeah, no, I wouldn't check that.

It's too hot.

It's just a lot of work.

A lot of unnecessary work.

Seems like it.

You have to like shave outside in front of a broken mirror.

Like, there's a lot going on.

Great for the birds, though.

Hey, before we wrap up today, I have an idea I've been sitting on for about six months that I kind of want to pitch to you guys because I need a little bit of help with it.

I mentioned it to Andrew once before.

I think he was into the idea, but he agreed that it needed something.

And I was hoping maybe Eric specifically can help, but everybody is welcome to, obviously.

If you don't mind, I'd like to

pitch you this now.

Of course.

What is the most exciting thing in professional sports?

Don't answer.

I'm going to tell you, okay?

You think you know, but you may not know, but I'm going to give you the answer and then you're going to agree.

So I'll just go ahead and blurt it out.

The most exciting thing in professional sports is a game seven.

There's nothing better than a game seven.

The series is tied three to three, one game left to determine the outcome of two similarly matched teams that are just eking it out each week.

He gets on top, then they get on top, then they get on top.

And now finally, it culminates in this monumental final seventh game to determine who the greatest of whatever the fuck they're doing is, right?

What would be better for us than a whole series that we do that's just game sevens?

We We cut out all the middleman and we just do the most exciting part, a game seven series.

But that's if you've cut out all the other stuff, that's just like playing game one.

Like, there's no, there's no history.

That is where the problem is.

No, but it's all there.

It's all there.

It's all there.

We got, we gotta, yeah, I mean, that's one of the problems to address.

But we harness the energy of a game seven, so we just do game sevens.

What sport do you play seven times against the same team?

Baseball, basketball, baseball, hockey.

Off the rip.

Here's like four examples.

No, I just didn't know any of them.

Most American sports.

Yeah, it's that American stuff.

All right.

Yeah.

When you get a game seven, you're so fucking jazzed.

When a series, the ultimate goal, you want it to go one of two ways.

You want your team to win in four games, a brutal sweep where you just demoralize the other team and make them question being athletes in the first place, or you win in seven games in the tightest fucking, like, just razor-thin margin ever.

That's what you want.

I will say, I feel like some of this, Jeff, is feeling is associated because of your fandom of the Celtics.

Something

dread.

Well, I'm not done talking.

Being a fan of a franchise that wins, that is capable of winning, your views of what a game seven means, I think, might be a little bit different than mine, where to me, a game seven is pure dread.

It is the most disappointment.

100%.

Oh, there's a tremendous amount of dread because you could lose, but that's it.

Things are the most heightened.

No, not could.

Will.

Only.

Only, only will.

Things are the most heightened they can possibly be.

The stakes can't be any higher than a game seven.

The emotions are at a high, but not purely positive.

I would say largely negative.

But the scoring, isn't that done overall like the whole season?

Like, what's it got to do with one team?

What?

What the fuck is he talking about?

I have no idea.

What does it mean to win against one other team on game seven?

Oh, no, no, no.

You play a series of first to four wins the series.

Like, the World Series is best of seven games.

So you have to win four games in order to win the series.

And you play them all back to back.

What countries are involved in the World Series?

United States and Canada.

all right just waiting for the rest of the countries to step up i mean i mean you could you could also look at uh where the players are from dominican cuba i'm just i'm australia i feel like japan is huge on baseball south korea wow in the world series

shohe otani was just in the world series yeah what are you talking about all right

anyway as soon as england wants to field a team they can Here's the small problem that I'm having trouble overcoming is how do you get to just game sevens?

Like, that's the pry.

We got to churn through games one through six in some way so that we only have game sevens.

Sim them on a video game.

Yeah, yeah, I mean, you have to, right?

Yeah, I think so.

Yep, well, yeah.

But then how do you ensure that the sim gets to a game seven?

I'm just trying to figure out a series where we harness the power of the game seven and only the game seven.

I'm bringing it to you guys to get me over the hump because I can't quite figure out what the show is.

I just see it in my notes every week and I think about it every time I see it on my notes.

What if we fire up like 20 consoles and we just start simming stuff in all these different games and we'll just stop at every game seven and then play it.

That could work.

I like that idea actually.

And sometimes it won't work out.

Like two Xboxes won't ever have a game seven.

So you Start them simming something else.

I think different sports games across multiple Xboxes that are constantly constantly being simmed and then stop on game sevens.

I think it has to be one Xbox doing it.

I think that the rarity of the game seven makes it sweet, like Jeff is talking about.

And if we just have 20 Xboxes going, we'll get a bunch of game sevens.

But to me, there's less meaning than one Xbox doing it.

And we go, oh shit, this one's a game six.

This one might get to game seven.

And it doesn't.

And we go, oh, I like that.

What if in the office at all times, we're doing real-time sims of games.

Uh-huh.

And it's just constantly working.

I kind of love that.

I kind of love having

that too.

There's like a TV that we put in a corner and we turn on the Xbox and it's simming MLB the show 25 or whatever.

162 games season.

Yeah, just go.

And you got to see if it gets there.

If it gets there, that's great.

Then we get to the game seven and we've been waiting and waiting and waiting for it.

And then we take over.

Or we just watch.

I think we watch.

I think we watch.

I think we have to watch and we have to bet.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And then, so there's only a game.

So the game seven show is only released when we get a game seven.

Absolutely.

So it could be like once a year.

It could be three times in a week.

Right.

It would be like insanely infrequent.

And that would be really fun.

We could even put in time lapses of the games not reaching game seven.

Yeah, game.

To like actually show how long it took.

Oh, we could have a slopper clock in the frame.

And you could see the time whizzing by.

And maybe the clock will stop at the same time as mine and Nick's clock.

Which last night I started thinking about again and I just couldn't believe it.

It blown my mind.

It's crazy.

It's crazy.

It's crazy.

It's crazy.

Never seen anything like it before.

Wild.

Did we put our batteries in at the exact same second?

We had to.

That's incredible.

Wild.

We're a minute apart.

All right.

Well, I think you guys helped me get over the hump.

I think we have a show here.

Only game sevens.

It's like oops all crunchberries.

Oops, only game sevens.

What if it's running in your break room and it's just on the TV?

Ooh,

I like it.

Yeah.

That's fun.

Yeah.

Yeah.

We just have to put an Xbox in there.

Yeah.

That's a problem.

All right.

I'll go buy us another Xbox.

I think we've got plenty.

Yeah.

Yeah.

All right.

Well, you're going to donate yours.

I mean, an Xbox One.

Or what was the other one?

A one X.

We got loads of those that we're not using.

We do.

We do.

Do we?

Don't you?

We do.

We do.

I every Xbox I own is in use, so I don't.

You didn't ever have a 1x?

Yeah, Millie's hand-me-down Xboxes.

Yeah, there might be like there might be old ones or whatever, and we just run an older game on it.

I think that's fun too.

Just running an older game on it.

It's fun.

Absolutely.

Which game seven?

What are we doing?

What's the sport?

Let's lock that in.

I like MLB the show first.

I like that.

Yeah, we just play an old version of MLB the show.

Just do like a 2018 or something.

Can you run a game in real time?

Or does it have to be sped up no no I think I think you can run it I think you can run in real time we'll just have to see if it's see if it's a thing that you can do with like their season mode or whatever and see how it goes yeah and then after we do a baseball season we'll do uh basketball and then hockey or vice versa and then switch we'll just cycle through yeah yeah yeah what when when we get to the game seven and we do it we go to the next sport after it oh

i love this

It's going to take so long to change a sport.

Yes, I know, but I think that's like how special it is to have the

game seven.

I mean, it's going to be a long.

Now, let me ask you this.

Are we only playing World Series game sevens?

Or if the National League Championship Series is a game seven,

it's got to be World Series.

It's got to be

the end of the year.

So there's going to be the end of the end.

There's a really good chance we'll play, we'll sim 30 teams playing 162 games each in real time and then not get a game seven.

Yes.

Absolutely.

Yeah.

Okay.

Okay.

Do we know what team we're going to be playing as?

No, we don't know yet.

We'll have to see what game it is and then what we can do with it.

We might have to spin a wheel to determine the team.

We might have to spin a wheel.

Wheel spin could be good, but that could also mean like we're never going to the playoffs.

Yeah, yeah.

We picked the Cincinnati Reds and we're fucking boned.

But are we going to sim

when you just sim every team?

Are we going to bet on any game, any World Series game seven, or do we have to be, does our Reds have to be?

I guess that's true.

It could just sim to any World Series game seven.

That would be it.

It's still super rare.

I mean, you still get one shot a season at a game seven.

Okay.

Well, let's see what we can make happen.

We can put it together.

This is great.

All right.

Something to do in the office.

What if the seventh game is a tie?

There's no tie.

It keeps going.

Extra innings.

Yep.

Oh.

Yeah, it's like a real sport.

How?

He didn't like that.

What sports not real?

Ones with a tie.

Well, I mean, you wouldn't tie a final in a sport, would you?

No, any sport.

No, so how could there be?

So, why would you suggest it?

Yeah, yeah,

yeah, yeah.

Who, who, whose side do you think Jeff is on right now?

Yeah,

could be yours.

It's not.

I'm on Jeff's side.

Andrew's on Jeff's side.

Wrap this up.

Get us out of here.

Well, there you have it.

You've listened to another hour and

about 12 minutes of absolute hilarity.

This has been the Regulation Podcast.

I have and continue to be Jeff Ramsey.

The others are themselves.

Thank you for listening.

Check us out on Patreon at patreon.com slash the regulation pod.

Check us out on Twitch at twitch.tv slash the regulation pod.

Check us out on YouTube at whatever.

We'll see you next time.

I have Jeff Ramsey.

I have and continue to be Jeff Ramsey.

I have continue to be.

I have been and continue to be Jeff Ramsey.

Okay.

Okay.

That's fine.

I'm on Gavin's side.

I'm on Nick's side.

No, I'm on Nick's side.

I'm on my side.

I'm a man alone on an island.

That's probably true.

I'm stopping.

Goodbye.