Small Park Bites // Mario Party Confession [49]
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Transcript
Charlie Sheen is an icon of decadence.
I lit the fuse, and my life turns into everything it wasn't supposed to be.
He's going the distance.
He was the highest-paid TV star of all time.
When it started to change, it was quick.
He kept saying, No, no, no, I'm in the hospital now, but next week I'll be ready for the show.
Now, Charlie's sober.
He's gonna tell you the truth.
How do I present this with any class?
I think we're past that, Charlie.
We're past that, yeah.
Somebody call action.
Yeah, aka Charlie Sheen, only on Netflix, September 10th.
This is episode 49.
Whenever you arrange, Jeff, take it away.
I yelled the sync.
I don't know why.
Wait, what did it sound like when you did it?
Like, let's hear it.
Yeah.
It was like three and two.
I might shout.
Well, in the rich tradition of Gavin yelling, hello, and welcome to another episode of the Regulation Podcast.
This is episode 49.
My name is Jeff with me, as always.
Andrew, Eric, Gavin, Nick.
And this one's not going to be gross.
Although I will say, we're recording these back-to-back.
We just did 48 a couple seconds ago, so we haven't seen it, but I'm going to guess that the audience response to 48 was glowing and overwhelmingly positive, and they want more, more, more.
And I appreciate that, but we don't have it queued up yet.
We're going to have to go back to the lab for that.
So instead, you're just going to have to get whatever today's about to be.
Can I,
I don't usually start with stuff.
I, you know, kind of like leave it to the talent and not me.
But can can I float something to you guys real quick?
Yeah.
Talent.
Baseball season is back, and I'm a big fan of like AA, triple-A, minor league baseball.
They do anything they can to get you in.
The Hartford Yard Goats, the AA affiliate for the Colorado Rockies, are showing the float your goat, a quarter-pound all-beef hot dog with chopped peppers, onions, bacon, and brown mustage, submerged in a glass of 100% whole goat milk.
I'd try it.
I didn't realize it was milk until.
It was milk.
Yeah, what the fuck?
I thought you just hated water.
Oh, God.
Get off the screen.
Float your goat.
There's our.
That's our.
Don't take it off.
That's our cover.
I need that for the screen.
I need that for the thumbnail.
So, like, the squirrels weren't a problem.
It's, it is.
I mean, it's a wet bread thing.
Yeah.
It just didn't.
It didn't strike me as, oh, that's crazy.
You wouldn't eat that.
Brutal.
I'd try it.
You wouldn't.
Nick would try it.
Nick would absolutely try it.
Yeah, Nick would try it.
Yeah, absolutely.
So do we have to go now to Hartford?
I don't.
I love Hartford.
It's beautiful.
I don't know.
Let's do it.
I feel like there's so many other places we need to go first.
I was looking at what
the time of this recording is opening day for baseball.
Yeah, baseball started an hour ago.
Yeah, the Padres are about to kick off here.
It's be uh tea time here in about six minutes.
Why don't we just make this for Nick?
In the oh, yeah, we can make it, but like, yeah, whatever, yeah, whatever floats is goat.
I was looking at uh, what the other stadiums were doing because I was looking at like the major league stuff.
The blue velvet whoopie pie for the Kansas City Royals, which seems like that seems pretty good.
The Phillies
are doing a s'mores quesadilla.
Oh, I'm in.
Yeah, that's that's pretty good.
That's that's nice.
You seen the Mariner's corn dog?
Yeah.
That is exactly what I was sending.
The Mariner's What Up, Corndog.
Yeah.
What the fuck is that?
What has happened?
What do you mean?
They're trying novelty food.
None of this is food.
No, it's all food.
I just want to understand what I'm looking at with this corn dog.
It's
dyed like taco chips covering corn dog.
That looks like it would be so good at cleaning my tool glasses.
If you eat that, it's going to clean out your colon, is what it's going to do.
The St.
Paul Saints, who I'm not familiar with at all, are introducing this hot dog with pulled pork and fries covering it that is over 10,000 calories.
Oh, it is
six feet long.
Shit, look at that thing.
Let's get it.
There's a lot happening in baseball.
I'm excited.
What's great is that you could use that to measure how far you need to dig for your grave and then you're set once you're finished.
You just, You take bites leading down to it until you reach the bottom.
You know that you just lay down.
It's a perfect measuring stick.
That would be so funny to make the ground out of shit food and then you eat your grave hole.
Eat your grave hole.
Eat your grave hole.
I want to go back to the Hartford goat thing, the milk dog.
Is that going to be an item on their menu for the whole season or is this like a singular game event?
I don't know.
My understanding is that if they're doing that just for like the one thing for like the Hartford Yard Goats, I bet that they do it not just for opening day, I bet I mean, it's a thing to get people in the stadium, sure.
But that's the point of that thing.
Like, we did an episode, there's a thing at the Dell Diamond, the AAA baseball stadium here called uh, Nick, what is it?
The Del Del Dinger hot dog thing, is that what it's called?
Oh, what was it?
And it's, it's a hot dog, but on like like a grilled cheese.
And you go, that's so funny.
And then you eat it and you go, that's fucking sucked.
But they tricked you.
And that's the point of major, like minor league baseball.
They're just tricking you.
I mean, could we just make all these and rank them?
Yeah, yeah.
Do you want to start with the hot dog in the milk or what?
I think Nick was going to take care of that one.
And I can do the s'mores.
crepe or whatever.
I mean, I think it should be a series that we do,
a ballpark bites type series.
We'll call it small park bites because we'll be making it in our kitchen.
John, you're so, Jeff, you're so good at that.
How How did you name it?
It's a great achievement hunter, man.
Like, that was such a good name right there.
Dude, I've improved.
I put a lot of effort into names since Rooster Teeth and Achievement Hunter, trust me.
And f ⁇ face.
Well, f ⁇ face is great.
I stand by f ⁇ face.
You're right.
I don't.
I want to propose something to you guys.
I'm not done with the hot dog.
Are we
done?
No, no, no.
After Andrew's done with the hot dog, I want to propose something to you guys.
How long does the season go?
When is the last game for the Hartford Yard Goats?
Roughly.
like what month probably in august or september yeah uh it's probably like around that hartford yard how about this schedule yeah gavin hasn't uploaded his files 20 times last time i counted wow i've had to ask him about it 20 you're over 20 now that was prior to a few times i've had to ask it are we talking like you because a lot of the time with mario party right you'll be like upload your file and it's been 85 seconds since i got off the discord okay first of all it's 10 minutes and that that's more than enough time for you to remember to upload an audio file that is so short.
We don't need a tailsync for it.
I'm saying anytime you forget to upload, now, and I need to ask you for it.
Mario Party is going to be over by the time that this comes out.
If I have to, if I get to 50 asks for you, you have to go down and eat this fucking dog at the park.
You got to go to Hartford, Connecticut.
By the end of the season, you have 30 strikes.
It's way more than they have.
30 strikes in your house.
So many strikes.
Until when?
September.
September 7th.
It would have to be, I would say the last day of August would be the cutoff because we need time to book a flight.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
So August 31st.
All you have to do is upload your files that you're supposed to upload and not screw that up 30 times between now and August.
Well, let me do this in classic Andrew fashion then.
Screw your 30.
I could do 20.
Okay.
Yes.
Yep.
And in classic Andrew fashion, I cannot wait to see this blow up in your face.
Yeah.
This is...
Why would you do anything in Andrew fashion?
You're crazy.
Boys, get ready.
We're going to Hartford.
I've got upload confidence now.
Upload confidence.
Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Actually, if I don't.
You just, what are you doing?
Hold on, Eric.
Hold on.
Hold your horse.
If I don't upload
audio and video, does that count as two or one?
Yes.
That's two.
That's two.
You forgot two things.
You said 20.
That does make sense.
That does seem fair.
Even though it's one ask.
It's probably not one ask.
I don't know.
I'm asking you to do two things.
It's two asks.
Yeah.
Audio and video.
Yeah.
Okay.
No, you're right.
Oh, I like this.
I've got until August and I've got 20 strikes.
20 strikes.
Okay.
And I'm going to win.
What do I get if I win?
Nothing.
I'm less annoyed at you.
Okay.
Yeah.
What you win, we all win.
That's pretty cool.
I think they play at Dunkin' Donuts Park.
If you win,
I'll get you a plaque.
Look at that.
Wow.
It's pretty cool.
And then you can hold on to it until you lose it to somebody else in some kind of a similar bet.
It's going to be great when the audience can not only yell eat the pencil, but also eat the dog milk.
It's going to be fantastic.
Or you refuse to.
I would actually do it.
I wouldn't just look at the dog milk for four years and not do it.
Well, one of them is an edible product.
And the other is
not a food.
Quite a strange thing to agree to up front in there, wouldn't it?
Yeah, it was.
Yeah, that was a huge mistake.
Zero arguing on that point.
I just don't think that it's comparable a food item to a non-food item.
I mean, you get a snack and a drink at the same time.
Let me be honest with you.
I think one of the other of us will eat the pencil before you do.
I did see somebody say that
Andrew and I should trade and he should do seven-day survivor and I should eat the pencil.
I got no problem eating the pencil, but it'll be a cold day in hell before that seven-day survivor gets done in my name by anybody on this fucking earth.
Jesus.
I've got to start delivering because, you know, Andrew's pretty slow on the pencil.
Nick's pretty damn slow on these boots.
I want to get this limbo going.
What?
I need you guys.
Yeah.
All right.
Oh, yeah.
Do you want to stream it?
Like, is it like a streamable thing?
I think it's a streamable thing, but it just has to come out.
I'll need time to like learn it, won't I?
I could potentially stream the attempt, but should I do my research beforehand?
Oh, I was just thinking we do it on Fridays.
I want to watch you do this, but I mean, like...
Okay, yeah, we can try.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's great.
I mean, it's only like a three-hour game.
It's a three-hour game, but we only stream for like an hour.
We might have to stream until like 8.01.
Oh, I don't know how this game works.
I don't know anything about this game.
I'm just spitballing.
Is there saving?
The whole point is, Eric, is that he beats the game start to finish with less than five deaths, I think.
Here's what's going to happen.
I'm going to, oh, I'm going to die maybe 50 to 100 times just playing the game through.
Then I'm going to have to remember all the times I died and start trying to make it further and further without dying until I make it to the end with five deaths or less.
I was thinking about this just last night.
I've always wanted to get this achievement as well.
So I think what I'm going to do is I'm going to play just slightly behind you.
I'm going to watch you play and then play.
Oh, that's so small.
However, you die, you're just going to go, okay, I'm not going to do that.
That's so that is the smartest thing I've ever heard.
That's brilliant.
I can't even be mad at that.
Nick, you should play slightly behind Andrew.
Okay.
Does anyone want to play slightly ahead of me?
I've never even played the fucking game.
It's a good game.
If someone knows what's coming up, can they tell me?
I think so, but none of us would.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's true.
Yeah, maybe if you had better friends.
So that's so matter of fact.
No, it's just the truth.
Like, yeah, absolutely.
Yeah, none of us are going to be.
None of us know that game well enough to be able to do that.
But even if we did, you're not getting any lifelines.
I just learned it's three hours long.
Imagine if you watched me play all the way through.
You would then know and you could remind me.
Okay.
You'd get a lifeline, but it'd be soaked in kerosene, which is a hell of an American scenario.
We got to do Nick in the Boots.
I've been trying to push for it for quite a while.
We have so much to do.
We also have face-off season two.
We have Wheel of Decades coming up, which I'm very excited about.
I'm really excited about this limbo thing.
And of course, our summer, we got a Nick in the Boots thing, which will have to be a summer trip, I think,
at this point.
Okay.
To the mall, I mean, a summer trip to the mall.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
A summer trip.
Wait, summer?
Well, when else are we going to do it?
Anytime.
It's just him wearing boots.
Why is that what you're incredulous about?
Like, what?
It just became spring at this point.
Yeah, like, like that feels so long.
I just feel like we're, I'm about to be out of town forever, and then we have the anniversary to get ready for, and all the store stuff, and all the stuff content that we have to prepare for that.
And then that whole big thing.
And then, and then you're going to turn it on.
It's going to be June.
And then I figured then we do it.
Well, there's a scenario in which Face Off Season 2 is not that far away.
And I don't think we can start that until Nick films the boots.
I think you're right about that, actually.
I don't think it can begin until that comes out.
I'll eagerly await that scenario.
uh but i do think that we can start trying to pencil this thing in on the calendar but i have a feeling what jeff said is pretty accurate it's going to be a minute before we can probably get to it i just know how hard it is for us to schedule stuff in person and i just am just feeling like we're pretty we're more busy than we think hopefully it's much easier soon god i hope so we don't we just don't have to keep using your kitchen well the boots aren't going to do any good in my kitchen no no i have a clip oh shit gavin again that was fast Yeah.
Gavin's heard this before, but it just,
it's fitting.
I've been going through a CPAP journey, as you all know.
Going through different things.
And
the exact same day that we recorded the podcast about the foghorn being a sign of death, I tried a different CPAP mask.
And I was testing it out.
And I fell asleep.
And then I woke up.
a little bit later to a large message that my partner wrote saying, I don't know what is happening, but you're making a foghorn-like noise through the something's not right with how you have this mask on.
And they recorded audio of it.
I'm dropping it in the thing.
And they had no context of the foghorn conversation.
So when I read that you were making a foghorn noise after we had spent the entire day talking about that a foghorn would go off, indicating your imminent death, it was very alarming.
Here is the audio clip I'm putting as a video.
It's a black video.
If you want to listen, three, two, one, play.
Do you hear anything?
It's a slow build.
Oh my god.
Sounds like a ship pulling in.
My response was, oh shit, who just got born?
That was
the most fog horse sound you think ever.
It wasn't even just like generic horn sound.
It was literally like, I would think a ship is there.
100% foghorn.
I felt like I was wearing a pea coat.
Oh my god.
So you sounded like a horror movie trailer when it goes
like what the fuck was a thing where like the mask seal because I accidentally recreated it while messing with it uh when I was awake after that.
But yeah, it's a thing where like there was a seal issue on the side of my mouth and it was creating like that whistle foghorn sound, which is so much louder in person than the audio conveys.
But I did it's insane coincidence to have the conversation we had and then me to turn into a human foghorn that evening.
Very funny.
You, you sound, you sound
exactly.
You sound like
you sound like cinematic horn hits.
Mystery sound.
That's injured breathing at night.
There was a time, Gavin, you're a very busy man.
There's a time where you took my gagging noise.
I don't even remember what it was, but you put it to the Jurassic Park thing.
thing.
If I find a trailer that uses that, yes, I will.
Oh, that would be great.
Yeah, I put your, I think you were sniffing the
batter bottle.
Oh, and I put it over, I put that sound over Velociraptors, but then I don't think we ever even posted it.
No, we didn't.
Maybe we should put that on the Patreon.
Yeah, let's do it.
Because we have a place to do it because we didn't want to do it for, I think, copyright reasons.
Yeah, a little bonus oil.
And I'll tell you what, Andrew.
I'll go ahead and get that clip.
Tell you why, because I kept it.
Holy hee shit.
Oh, this is good.
This is good.
You kept it, but the question is, is it uploaded anywhere?
How accessible is it going to be?
I don't know.
I think that was a checkmate.
That was pretty good.
I love this podcast.
It's a great time.
It's a great time.
I'm so fucking excited about all that stuff we were talking about that's coming up on the horizon that we have to figure out how to record.
Everything we have to make is so delicious.
You know, I'm just so fucking excited about it.
I am equally, yeah, it's all going to be so much fun to do.
I'm equal.
The thing I wanted to pitch,
I'm just throwing this out there.
You guys know how when you go to like a basketball game or a baseball game, they have like the owner's boxes and the suites that like corporations will rent out.
It'll be like AT ⁇ T will have it and then, you know, or like Warner Brothers would have one and like Allen would take somebody to like a fucking UT game or whatever.
Yeah, like a little schmooze cabinet.
How much do those things cost for like a single A baseball team?
Well, do they have them?
Wouldn't it be cool if our company was able to acquire one of those?
Or like at a hockey, like minor league hockey?
Like the least impressive.
You're talking about like getting a box, right?
Yeah.
Like right now, for a season.
Like for a season.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, for a season.
For a season.
It's got to be like six figures.
No.
No.
Not for like the level.
Not for minor league sports.
No, not for minor leagues.
That's what I'm saying.
If you go low, like Round Rock Express might be a little pricey because they're after
a high-profile minor league team.
There's got to be one out there that's criminally affordable.
What if we get one, but that's the only place we can record the podcast?
Well, that's going to be my, where I was going with it, was then it would become a recording space.
We could record episodes there.
But there's always like the sound of people hitting dingers in the background, the crowd.
Like, you can only record during a game.
What about like the Austin Stars hockey team?
Yeah.
That'd be cool.
Oh, yeah.
Like, how, I wonder how much it is to get, because you can get a party suite.
Now, you have to contact a ticket representative in order to get any of this information.
I know, right?
So stupid.
I don't know.
It sucks for Nick to have to do that, but
I nominate him.
Oh, God.
Party suites can accommodate 20 to 70 guests, and it'll just be four of us hanging out.
And we'll put Andrew on an iPad.
Yeah, absolutely.
Oh, absolutely.
Yeah.
I mean, interesting.
Very interesting.
I think, I think the big thing is it's you're trying to get like food and shit.
Yeah.
I think that's what they're trying to sell you on.
That's not where we should be spending our money as.
And I'm sure we don't have enough money to do it anyway.
But I just throw that out there as like a, you know, lofty goals for someday.
We could schmooze and take other public.
We could be like, hey, Ray, you want to go hang out with us at our booth?
And he'd be like, no.
Ray?
And also we know, hey, Michael, do you want to go go hang out with us at our booth?
Your pie in the sky dream is, guys, we got to get Ray to come to a game with us.
Ray's a good cat.
The problem is, I don't like to schmooze with people I don't know anymore.
So my pool is real limited.
Oh, you want to butter up your close friends?
Yeah, yeah.
It's like
if we don't invite Jeremy, I don't know.
We're kind of, I don't know.
This is what we do.
This is how we do it.
Remember when back in the day where companies would just sponsor us to do something and they would have money and they wouldn't have any clue what to do with it and we'd have to come up with it?
We just have the company that sponsors whatever we're doing in there just to pay for that for a season.
Maybe that Vegas.
Oh, I bet Vegas would be too expensive.
But there is that dude from
the Minor League Vegas team that reached out to me who works in the front office.
Maybe he could.
It just seems like a perfect thing to waste some corporations' money on instead of ours.
Yeah, no, I totally agree.
I don't want to waste patrons' money on anything.
That's what I'm saying.
It'd be like a down-the-road kind of thing.
But yeah, there would be if we could trick like
a hot dog company, oscar mayer
i'm looking at the bc lions what their sweet boxes are 215 per person is the most expensive minimum amount of people uh minimum amount of people looks like 14.
okay jesus
i don't know 13 other people who would want to go to something like this with me pretty pricey but like not
like that's a measuring stick i guess it'd be interesting to see how a cfl team lines up with like a minor hockey team in terms of because you're also going to need to find a minor team that is in a pro arena to even have suites.
That's that's an excellent point.
So there's a level of prestige required even on the smaller league scale.
We just have to find the shittiest prestige team across all sports.
Just a market that does not care, but they have a team.
I was going to say Florida feels like.
I was about to say like hockey in Florida.
Yeah.
They're so good.
It's so frustrating how good the Florida paints are.
How good they are and how nobody in Florida gives a shit.
Yeah, it's so upsetting.
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I have a thing to bring up that
this will be an
interesting reaction for me to see.
Because I said something and I was told that I needed to bring it up here.
Uh-oh.
Because I felt very confident about it.
Once again, related kind of my CPAP stuff.
I have a mask now.
that is just nose.
My other mask was nose and like covered the nose and mouth.
This is just a nose mask.
I'm trying to figure out like what works best for me.
And I was talking about the perks of having just a nose mask as opposed to the face and nose being covered or the mouth.
And one of the perks I said was I will now be able to sneeze without fear.
In which I was told that sneezing is a nose thing as much as it is a mouth thing, which I disagreed on.
Well, I think we've talked about this before.
Because I'm a mouth sneezer always.
Yeah,
I'm a violent mouth sneezer i i prefer it through the mouth otherwise sometimes my ears pop i didn't even really i'm such a mouth sneezer i can't even really imagine nose sneezing i think i'm only a nose sneezer really
fire out lugies sometimes i'm definitely more of a nose sneezer big time i'm not loogies but i've definitely sneezed like particles yeah
that's wild i think i at a young age started redirecting them through the mouth hole and i it like scares me to get them back through the nose when I sneeze It's like a dragon spitting fire like it is I'm just sending everything out via the mouth.
It's messy, but I'm covering it with my shoulder.
So it's fine.
But like if I wasn't there's spray everywhere.
Isn't the point of the sneeze to clear the nose?
Yeah.
I think it is.
Yeah.
Like when I when the counterpoint was explained to me, I was like, yeah, I think you're, that's all correct.
I mean, isn't the tickle in the nose?
Right.
Yeah, I thought so.
I feel like that's the light of the fuse is how I feel.
You choose where to fire.
You choose where to aim it on the way out.
Ah, dude, I'll be honest.
I don't think I have the ability to sneeze out of my mouth.
I think I'm.
I could definitely do it, but what we're saying is that if it's in the nose and it's trying to clear the nose, redirecting it to the mouth does you no good, right?
Well, it does the trick.
I don't need to.
I mean, I get the satisfaction from it.
Maybe that's why I sneeze three times every time I sneeze.
Because it's not.
Because you're not doing anything to fix it.
Yeah.
You'll notice this after a while, just like, oh, forget it.
Yeah.
You give up.
I never thought about that.
You're like, ah, I need to stretch my legs.
Ah!
Sorry, I thought yelling would help.
I actually do yell at the same time as my, as the sneeze.
Oh, yeah, absolutely.
I like it when it's like,
and it's like, it really feels like everything's flying out of your head.
Yep.
Oh, I got to be honest, I kind of like a sneeze.
I try to sneeze.
as loud as humanly possible because it annoys the shit out of my wife.
Yeah, me too.
I've started doing those real like dad sneezes too, where I'm like sat on the couch and I sneeze and I sort of curl up real quick in the fetal position for a brief second to the point where it's like I don't go full feel, but the force of it kind of lifts me off the couch a little bit.
I actually get little bits of air when I do a good sneeze.
Really?
Yeah.
Wow.
Oh, that sounds fun.
Maybe I'll incorporate that.
I enjoy a sneeze.
I think it's fun.
I love them.
I have a good time.
But I think my nose is too
vacuous to direct all the effort.
I think my brain would come out or something.
Yeah.
A big chunk of something.
You'd sneeze out a part of your brain.
Just like a little chunk.
How scary would that be if I just sneezed in front of you?
A little piece of hamburger meat came out.
Just a little bit of brain was hanging out of the nostril.
I have a question for you, Kevin.
Nose-related, nose-mouth, hair.
If we lit 10 candles and put them in a row, two sets of 10 candles.
Yeah.
Do you think you blow out with your mouth faster all of the candles or your nose?
What's more powerful?
Mouth.
Really?
Yeah, the nose is a nightmare.
Really?
In what way?
Because I assume it's surgical.
I just have very little control over the valves.
Like sometimes I'm trying to blow out through my nose and then suddenly it's like and it just goes shut and then my ears hurt and then it like comes out my throat.
I've got no control over it.
How are you getting on with that with the nose only?
Are you discovering what it sounds like when your mouth comes open?
Yeah, it's terrifying.
I'll be sleeping and then I'll wake up very suddenly, very scared, because my mouth has opened up during the night and it's going...
I likened it to when James Bond stabs someone's scuba tube in Thunderball and you just hear like,
yes.
I'm messing around the settings.
I definitely feel like I need to reduce the amount of pressure that's being currently shot through.
because the first time i tried it i felt like i had a nosebleed after about an hour like i just i it did not feel good i just i don't know funneling high-powered air through your nose is a lot
it's taking some good
it does not at any point feel natural no but you sleep well uh
okay better than before less dangerous than before well that's good yeah not having like disturbances or whatever but it's just yeah definitely a little bit of a learning curve I think I had a false
start because I hadn't slept well in probably like 10 months.
So that first one where I came in late for Mario Party gave me a perception of this is super easy and I'm just going to be great at this.
And it's been, I think, as I said at that time, a little bit of a learning process of, oh, how does like normal sleep work?
What do you do with naps?
Do you get all plugged in for a nap or do you just nap like normal?
So when I wasn't sleeping at all, I would need to nap throughout the day or at least have one nap a day.
So cool.
Later in the evening.
I'm glad you're fixing it.
Yeah.
Now, now it's like that has been the biggest change of like, oh, I don't need to nap at all.
Naps are good for you, though.
Yeah, they are.
Especially the older you get.
And
I think probably the way Andrew was sleeping and everything, it wasn't really a good for you thing.
You know what I mean?
No, no, no, no, no, no.
And also like.
Positive napping versus like needing, like I was, it was.
Required napping.
Yeah.
Saying, I think probably calling what I was doing napping is maybe a little inaccurate.
What was your percentage of hate naps?
Oh, man.
Not often.
I haven't hate napped in a while.
You know what's funny is that like the start of hate napping was I was just wrong.
Like I was so mad that they drafted a certain player and that player has been like the best player on the franchise in the franchise for like the past eight years.
I like that you went full hate nap on something that was completely outside of your life and beyond your control.
That's what being a sports fan is.
I don't know.
That's literally all sports.
Yep.
I mean, I get that.
I get like getting emotionally involved, but I'm surprised you weren't hate napping more for stuff in your own life.
No, I get, you know, I don't know.
I guess I like to settle things in a healthier way that that's actually impactful as opposed to sports where it's like, oh, there's no amount of like personal
working through this issue that matters.
Like this ultimately it doesn't matter.
I'm just very angry at this at this time.
yeah i mean that's probably a good thing that you weren't hate napping real life events you were just
yeah if i hate nap real life events i oh boy i don't think that works i think you would have taken a lot of a lot of hate naps after mario party if you were doing that
oh man
i am so on the fence about sharing because i oh i'm you know i gotta do it for content reasons i have to do it now you can't well hold on this is great This is do it.
What are you about to share?
What are you going to do?
I'd love to share something related to Mario Party.
But it's not over for us yet.
But we need to know.
Yeah, I know, but it's going to be way over by the time this comes out.
And
I think...
Just remember, we're about to play against you in the morning.
I know.
That's why I'm saying like for content reasons, it's the move, but for like strategy, it's not.
But fuck it.
It's content.
We're a content group.
Let's do the content thing.
I, and my math is probably very wrong, but I was tired one night and I looked up all of the bonus stars and like what the requirements were for them and then I picked five of those there's like six or seven different bonus star options maybe a little bit more like eight but I picked like five of them and I watched every turn of Mario Party and I counted each thing
to the best of my ability insane what the fuck so I have
How many spaces we've all moved, how many items we've all used, how many Bowser spaces we've all landed on, how many green spaces we've all landed on and this is something that in three days the game will do for us yeah but i i was trying to figure out like if is there things that because i if i have any chance and my chance of of succeeding or winning in this thing is 0.01 but is there anything i can do to potentially cover myself in a bonus star situation because i'm going to need all three of those things if i have any chance which is not it's almost impossible as it stands so going into the last four turns, I had a two mini game lead over Nick.
Nick was in second.
And so yesterday when we did it, I thought, as long as I win one, the worst that'll happen is he could time me if he wins out.
Oh, I just need him to not win or do whatever.
As long as I win or he doesn't win, and I just need to win once, I'm fine.
Nick won yesterday.
I lost.
Today,
we did another mini-game in which I needed only one coin to technically win.
And because Gavin was such a shit stomping on my head, he prevented me from doing so.
So I've lost the next two.
There are too many games left.
Nick and I are currently tied of my match.
Correct.
The worst case scenario in these mini-games has come forward.
Or it was like two days ago.
It was, man, if I just win one of these, and as long as he doesn't win all of them, everything's fine.
And I have lost, lost and Nick has won two in a row.
And it is not looking good.
It's concerning.
I told you when you crossed me five turns early, I told you Dil Kong is dead.
That's true.
You did say that, and it did play out that way.
You shouldn't have told me that, man.
Ooh, boy.
Yeah, well, listen,
it's going to be fun these next two turns.
I am rooting for you so much to land on a chance time right at the end of the game.
I think it'd be so exciting.
I think so, too.
It would be great.
But yeah, I did my best to look into all the things.
And maybe some of the moves that you guys are like, why would you do that?
Maybe that is the influence of
I'm looking at stats that maybe you're not thinking about.
Need to get those items down.
Andrew's over here playing Moneyball.
Is that why you took star steals instead of the dice?
It was a factor of like, I get to do two of these as opposed to just one.
Interesting.
All right.
Didn't work out.
Hasn't worked out.
I don't, like, when I look at the data, I don't know how you have such a lead because you're not winning in any of the categories.
No!
It's all luck.
It's the most like...
Booze on the map.
Who cares about the bonus stars?
That's fair.
It's just, it's so funny.
We're like, when I betrayed you at turn 15, things were looking so fine.
And I have one star, which I expect to lose tomorrow.
Anyway, it's going to be, I think, funny to listen to this because the audience will have fully seen what happens and we're still two days out from getting the end results, which I can't wait for.
Wow.
It's going to be so weird to wake up not with you guys on day 31.
It is going to be a strange experience.
It's become a nice routine.
Yeah.
It really has.
I like waking up early.
I like making my little coffee.
I like squirting out a little merry party turn and then going for a nice morning poo.
It definitely is nice to feel productive right out the gate.
Yeah.
Like it gets you ramped up for the day.
I'm really excited to play just a normal 30-turn game to see how that feels in comparison.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I definitely don't ever want to play Mario Party again.
Why?
But you unlocked all the levels, all the cool levels.
We have to play the cool levels that you unlocked.
Yeah, we got to play the Bowser level.
I did.
I unlocked all those levels for sure.
I've had a lot of 30-turn Mario parties in the last couple, in the last like four weeks or so.
I have some new updates from Meg on where Andrew has lost her.
Uh-oh.
Oh, no gains?
All lost.
There was one thing she agreed with you.
She says, and I don't really remember what this is.
She said, Red Ball is butts up.
Okay, no, that's fair.
That is
the game in school where you have to run and touch the wall.
And if the ball hits before you touch it, you have to stand and get pelted by a ball.
But it's like differently named.
Yeah, butts up.
Yeah, for me, it was red butt.
She also
does not agree with any of your bathroom food.
Yeah, no, that's fair.
Once again, reasonable.
Does not care for your under-the-desk hot dogs, your blind wiping, and Winnie the Poohing.
She's deeply disturbed by all that.
I will say, I think that's maybe where I went wrong in Mario Party because I was naked for probably like the first 15 turns of Mario Party.
Really tapping in to the primal dill kong roots.
Hang on.
So you were just naked with like a red tie on?
With a tie on?
I wish, you know what?
I need to get a red tie and I have a red tie.
Why would you be naked?
I'd just roll out of bed naked.
And, uh.
Like, no boxes or anything.
What?
No, nothing.
Tap it in my Kong.
Inner Kong.
What about your chair, though?
That's got to be dirty butt chair now.
No, I got like a blanket on the chair.
Dirty blanket.
It's cozy.
It's cozy.
Well, the blanket gets washed.
What's dirty about his butt?
It was just in bed.
Yeah, he was just in bed.
It's dirty.
I don't think it is.
I don't think it is.
I think it's as clean as if you.
If you, what?
I'm sorry, go ahead.
Well, a sleeping butt is cleaner than a sitting butt.
But if you roll out of bed and then sit down on a chair, I don't know how the...
What's getting dirty here?
You or the chair?
Chair.
It's a more spread butt when you're sitting.
So you're transferring your clean bed butt to the chair and that somehow gets it dirty?
Well, if you're...
Because I should be not going to have a shower every night, right?
What?
The bath.
Are you washing your anus every night before bed?
He lives in the bath, dude.
He's a fucking.
We're on a run, guys.
He's in the bathtub like 11 hours a day.
He's the cleanest human being on earth.
You know, I had a little bit of a loss with that recently.
I was in the tub, and an earthquake hit when I was in the tub a few weeks ago.
You didn't mention that.
What the fuck?
How many episodes has it been since that happened?
Probably like five or six.
It's been a while.
What?
So I had a bath.
There was a tub quake, and I got out of the tub.
And then
later that day, I looked in the tub and the side of the tub had cracked from me with being filled with water in the tub.
And so
I had to give up the tub for a bit.
And it was a tough time until it got repaired.
So you had to get your tub repaired?
Yep.
Wow.
Took about three weeks of no tubbing.
Was that the worst three weeks of your life?
Definitely.
I think
my skin didn't know what happened.
My skin was very confused.
What do you mean?
Because, you know, you get like pruny feet and whatnot if you're in the tub.
Yeah.
So there is no prunage.
There's no prunage for like three weeks and it's not used to that.
So I think my skin was probably confused.
It was the first time in all these years that you haven't been in a permanent state of damp?
Well, not damp, you know.
I'm a water guy.
So I'm having showers and whatnot, but
no, just to soak?
No.
It's been a while since I had that streak broken.
What was your tub made of that it cracked?
Are they made of metal?
No.
What?
No.
Fiberglass, probably.
Yeah.
Do you have metal tubs?
Do you have a metal tub?
Probably not.
Fucking metal tubs over here.
You're just guessing at shit.
Well, I remember maybe as a kid I had a metal tub.
Like I remember something got dropped in it and it cracked some of the ceramic material off and there was metal.
Gavin's melting his tub down to make a weapon like the Mandivorian.
Rewinding it a little bit, you said you woke up naked and played Mario Party.
Jeff did a shirt off Mario Party, but Jeff's thing didn't have anything to do with him getting out of bed.
He just did it.
I went and saw a movie yesterday called Black Bag, a Steven Soderbergh movie that I really enjoyed.
And everyone's very rich and
the thing that they wear sort of in a bunch of these scenes is what I call rich people pajamas.
Oh, yeah.
Those are rich people pajamas.
Do you guys have these?
Are they comfortable?
What am I missing about rich people pajamas?
Because this looks so uncomfortable to sleep in.
I do have
not that exact pair, but I have some that are cut the same, that are the same material.
Do you sleep in them?
I have that exact pair.
Do you really?
I think it was for a video.
I think it was for a pajama-based video.
So, are they like, I guess my question for rich people pajamas, are they so comfortable you can't help but fall asleep?
Because I can't imagine sleeping in what looks like pants and a shirt.
Yeah,
I can't get away.
I need boxes only.
Yeah, me too.
I think it's more for like tooling around the last like hour until you're awake.
I have them because Emily is super into pajamas, right?
Because of her whole sleep routine.
So every time she buys a nice pair, she buys a pair for me too.
And I definitely like, there comes a point at the evening at like eight or nine o'clock where you just like throw those on and then you just kind of chill.
And it's just like a more comfortable way to hang out.
You're like sitting on top of the bed, watching TV.
And then when it's time to go to bed, then you just take the pajama top off.
That's, that's where I'm hung up because what you're describing, I do.
I'm in like, you know, some pajama-y shorts and like a big t-shirt and who cares like right now because I already did the stuff that I had to do today that's like out of the house.
So that's fine.
I understand that.
Watching this movie, it's like Michael Fastbender being very rich and wearing these pajamas, but like getting into bed and going to sleep with his wife with these pajamas on.
And the whole, it happens like three or four times in the movie.
And I just keep going, no fucking way.
There's no way you're sleeping in that stuff.
Do any of them have the hat as well?
What?
He's hot.
His honkshead has.
Yeah, yeah.
He also has a little, he also has like a little candle holder.
So he gets up.
I wonder if it happens more in the movies because of
just ease.
You don't have to take his shirt off.
You don't have to like have that make sense in the background.
But he's like, he's got to be, he's got to be ripped.
I'm sure he is.
Maybe it's also like a thing where a lot of actors and actresses, like, it's like less nudity, which maybe is, you know, an issue for some actors and actresses who don't want to be gratuitously nude for no reason.
Not that it's nude, but you know what I mean?
Like, I don't know.
No, I get it.
It's just, I don't know.
I don't know anyone who like sleeps in these.
So I just thought maybe after like the third time it happens in the movie, I was just going, dude, rich people pajamas must be like so nice.
Like they just must be so comfortable.
Sleeping in a shirt, I think every single time I've ever fallen asleep in a shirt, like whether it's one of those pajama shirts or just a t-shirt, I think it's been on accident and I've woken up an hour to two hours in sweaty and like ripping it off.
Like it's, I only sleep in a shirt if I'm already sick or it makes me sick.
Yeah.
That's it.
I'm at the point where I need to be able to adjust my temperature based entirely on the covers.
Because if I have the shirt to take off, I've got to get it all around the hose and all around the head gear.
It's the whole thing.
I didn't even think about the C-Power.
I thought maybe you were calling your dick a hose.
Yeah.
How do you get your shirt around your dick?
You gotta get it around the hoses.
I didn't even think about that.
That's uh, oh man.
I have to, my, I have to change my philosophy on shirts and bed.
If I did do shirts, the neck would have to be wide enough for me to get all the way through so I could go downwards.
Interesting.
I would view a shirt and bed as like an emergency deploy pillow.
It's essentially how I would use it.
A pillow?
Yeah, because sometimes, you know, like as the bed goes from the wall and all the pillows get shot down to the floor, if I needed a pillow, I would just pop my shirt off and bundle that and then I could use that.
Andrew.
And you're an animal because there's 17 pillows.
You already have eight.
You need a ninth?
But they're all below me.
I'm on top of all of them.
Andrew, I sent you a TikTok.
that could solve your problems.
Did you see it?
No, it doesn't.
Yeah, it doesn't work.
That wouldn't work because the bed would keep moving.
Can you explain it?
It's a pillow that covers a hole in the back.
Yeah, it's like a like a like a foam guard that is meant to sit in the space between your wall and your bed to stop, literally to stop pillows from falling down.
Oh, you like strap it to the bed somehow so that it just like it's kind of like the thing that you buy that like goes between your seat and your dashboard and your car to stop your keys or shit from falling out of your pocket and going under your seat.
It's kind of like that.
Why wouldn't it work?
I really appreciated it.
Wouldn't work for me because the
bed bed moves until it can't.
And it's bigger than that.
Yeah, but wouldn't it stop any...
The bed moves because of the pillows that go down there.
Oh, you think that's why?
Yeah, they're creating a wedge system.
Yeah, I think so.
Oh, maybe.
Pushing the pillows down is pushing the bed away from the wall.
Yeah, I think it might be worth a shot.
Like, you're crushing the pillows down the back of the bed, right?
You're like lying slumped on them.
Yeah.
Maybe I'll get this.
I just, I don't know.
I've seen it.
I didn't trust it just because of how far the bed goes.
Maybe I'll get this.
The solution to this is in your house.
It's downstairs.
It's true.
You do have a headboard.
It's a lot of
steps.
Take it up one step a day.
Why not just put the mattress and shit down by that?
That's where you sleep.
No, no, it's not the steps.
It's, I just, I need to, um, I need to get rid of the bed frame that it's currently on and adjust that and then.
set that up.
Well, a short-term solution might just be the thing I found on TikTok shop.
No, I think it's buying these expensive rich people pajamas and making them into pillows.
I'm not a pajamas guy because I don't want to wear a work uniform to sleep.
That's exactly
what it looks like.
It looks like he works at Bed Bath and Beyond, and this is what he has to wear.
And then he goes home and he sleeps in it.
That would be funny to sell a set of sleep uniforms.
Well, that's what the jamas are.
Sleep.
So I don't wear them.
Yeah, but if they actually looked like other jobs.
Yeah, like fireman pajamas.
Like we do, like we do like khaki, like pajama khaki pants and red shirts so it looks like you work at Target.
Gatham just invented underoos.
It could be all kind of stuff.
You can be Captain America.
Maybe you can be Iron Man.
You can be Dr.
Doom if you're feeling evil.
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Have you ever...
I had a funny thing happen the other night where I watched the movie Timeline.
That interesting timeline.
The story's not done.
It's a Paul Walker movie with Billy Connolly.
Gerard Muller.
It's a Michael Creighton.
It's a Michael Creighton book.
It is?
Oh, I did.
I'm pretty sure it's a Michael Creighton book.
What's it about?
They go to like medieval Europe or some shit.
Yeah, they're like archaeologists and there's a way for them to go back to medieval Europe.
And so they go back because one of the characters' dads gets stuck back in time, played by Billy Connolly.
But I watched it because I remember seeing it in theaters as a kid, forgetting it existed, and then going, oh, fuck, timeline.
What a weird movie that was.
That is funny.
So I watched, well, you know what?
I'm done.
You know what?
No, no, no, it was hilarious.
You know what?
I don't think it'll get funnier than that.
So I think we can call it there.
That was a real hee-haw.
Yeah, that was, you know what?
I got my jokes off.
I got my laughs.
I'm feeling pretty good about it.
You can move by someone else's.
Sorry, I didn't.
I don't want to shove your story down behind the
bed into the ground below the pillows.
Please continue.
No, no, I'm good.
I'm good.
I got the pillow.
I set up the story catcher, and it's, you know, we're good.
Real funny.
That was a good tale by me.
This actually coincides with my final meg note.
Put this in the highlight reel of the show.
What is your final megnote?
Jeff is the real villain.
Wow!
Wow!
Holy shit!
What what made her wow?
What made her say that?
That's great.
That's groundbreaking.
That's so crazy.
Wow.
No, it was based on when
he was opening the batter bottle and huffing it.
And Jeff was.
Those are two of the most British words, by the way.
We just put those on the list.
Yeah.
Writing them right now.
What was the other one?
Bottle and what?
Batter bottle.
Batter bottle.
Oh, yeah.
Batter bottle.
It was batter and a water bottle.
And
Jeff was just intensely focused on Andrew actually tasting the Ming and Old Batter.
Like, didn't just say it once.
You must have asked him, like, eight times.
Well, you know.
What are you going to do?
Villain is an interesting word.
It's not a word I would choose.
But
I'm excited for the next time we all go out to dinner there because I'm sure she can elaborate on it.
Anybody got any other stories about?
I don't know.
Paul Walker?
No.
Billy Connolly?
No.
2000s?
Wells run dry on
was it like they touched a bone or something and got sent back in time like why why were they in dark in time?
They they hang on.
What do you think happened?
They're archaeologists.
I assume they found some sort of
medieval weapon or something and they got
back to it.
You're thinking of the Black Knight starring Martin Lawrence where is that what happens?
Yeah, he sees like a medallion and a mini golf course and he goes to reach for it and he ends up time traveling back to medieval times.
Oh wow.
That sounds like a fun fun movie i should watch that i don't know if the black knight holds up
i can't imagine it does but
what do you think is better the black knight or timeline oh probably oh boy probably black knight because i think i remember reading i remember reading timeline in eighth grade and being so confused by what i was reading i'm like i don't follow any of what's happening here i don't think i've seen i don't think the movie yeah i don't think like the movie was any good i jeff i cannot imagine black knight was in your wheelhouse to begin with i mean i remember when it came out and all, but yeah, I wasn't, I didn't watch it.
What was the one with Jean Renault, where he was a knight that got brought to modern times?
The reverse of that.
I don't think I saw that either.
White Knight?
French Knight.
There's one where it's like Jean Renault and somebody gets sent back.
Just visiting.
It's an American retelling of the 1993 French comedy blockbuster La Visiteurs, in which
stars Jean Renault.
Okay, there you go.
There's two scenes in it.
I remember one where they eat urinal cakes because they just don't understand.
And then another one where they see a minivan and they think it's a dragon and they just beat the shit out of it with swords.
Why would you eat a urinal?
Why would you think a urinal cake is food?
I don't know.
I mean,
I've seen people wash their hands in those piss troughs.
Yeah.
They think the urinal cake is a soap.
That's another one.
Put that on the list.
Yep.
Yeah, thank you.
Urinal.
Yeah.
Should we have a back-to-back, like a dual screening of Black Knight and French Knight?
Yeah.
Black Knight and French Knight?
No.
That would be fun.
We have so much TV show to watch, dude.
I don't want to watch it.
Oh, yeah.
We have to deal with Decade Night.
We have to wait for your ass to come back from your trip so we can watch this shit.
God damn.
Do you know when you watch a movie that you haven't seen in...
So long like have you watched a movie recently where it's like, oh, it must have been like 25 years since I've seen that?
I've already picked the show or the movie I want to watch that will will be the furthest distance from when i last watched it oh what is it i'm gonna watch it hopefully in my 70s and i'm gonna watch
i'm gonna watch blue streak
another martin lawrence classic because i i remember red to you from blockbuster when i was uh sick and i was turning a day off from school and i must have been
10 but i think A nice 60-year gap between viewings will be an exciting one.
They're making a sequel.
Oh, shit.
They are?
They're making a sequel?
Why did Nick know that?
Hey, hey, as Gus told us, if Luke Wilson's in it, I'm there.
That's true.
Gus, a huge Luke Wilson fan.
What's a film that you've watched as a child that you think would be fun to watch again, but much later?
Porkies.
No, I don't know if that.
Hey, man, I don't know if that's going to be a fun one.
I don't know.
Oh,
Maverick.
Oh, yeah.
The Mel Gibson.
Yeah.
The Mel Gibson, like, gambling one or whatever.
Look at your cards, Maverick.
Look at your cards.
And he won't do it.
He won't look at his cards.
You know what I'd like to see?
One of my favorite movies when I was a little kid was Six Pack with Kenny Rogers.
And I haven't seen it since I was a little kid.
What is that?
He's like a stock car racer and he stumbles upon this group of kids that don't have parents.
And he ends up like taking them in and they help him as a stock car racer.
It's like six kids.
and it's like a fan.
Yeah, there you go.
It's like a comedy.
How old is Diane Lane?
I was probably seven or eight when I saw this.
I'd love to see it again, but maybe I'll watch it when I'm 100.
Is Diane Lane is in this and she's like, how old?
This is crazy.
Yeah.
And Karen Gray is in it.
She's the lady.
Diane Lane was a child actor?
I guess so.
What the hell?
She was in six-pack?
That's crazy.
I remember it being a great fucking movie, but you know, I was like maybe eight.
So.
Wow.
I like that they're making toys out of all the car parts
they're having fun and they are not currently making a sequel to it i i don't think yeah who knows oh robin hood men in tights
would that be fun yeah i saw that like a year ago oh did you did it hold up not for the first time i mean i liked it yeah i haven't seen it in a long time what about hot shots oh i haven't seen that since i was probably 12.
i've never actually seen hot shots i've only seen the second one yeah what about hot shots part die?
No, I didn't see that either.
Man.
Well, I'm out of ideas.
I remember thinking that movies spoofing other movies were not my thing.
Oh, wow.
Yeah, like Scary Movie and all that stuff.
I never saw any of that shit.
I never, like,
I don't know why.
I just, it never appealed to me.
Yeah, but like Naked Gun and Airplane and stuff are great.
That's different.
That Naked Gun is different.
That's a different genre.
Yeah, those are funny.
That's spoofing.
Jeez.
Cop stuff, though.
I guess.
I mean, airplane is a direct parody of.
I forget the name.
That's true.
I guess
it's weird for me to compare airplane to scary movie or not another teen movie or one of the.
Are they not?
Are they not by like the same people?
No.
Not the scary movie.
The Zuckers did.
I thought that I thought the Zucker Brothers had something to do with Scary Movie.
No, no, it's the Wayans were the scary movie people.
Huh.
Yeah.
Scary Movie 4, director, David Zucker.
Oh, wow.
I didn't think.
Listen, I didn't think I was wrong.
I will say, I went back and Emily showed me scary movie.
Whichever scary movie has Chris Elliott in it, she showed me that one.
And I said,
okay.
And I laughed through the whole thing.
And I thought it was funny.
Oh, with his hand?
Two years ago with a strong hand and stuff.
Yeah.
It was all very funny.
And so I was like, man, I can't believe I waited.
I had never watched this.
Eric, can I make when we're done with it, can I make a compilation from Pico Park of all the times that you're wrong?
Yeah, no, that's fine.
I think it, I think it would be really good to have a YouTube short on our channel.
So, I think that's probably, yeah, I don't think it would fit within a short time.
I can't imagine it would be more than 60 seconds.
So, yeah, I don't really have an issue with that.
Go for it.
Any other thoughts?
We wouldn't have to tail sink for that.
Oh, also, the audience told me that that game that I tried to get everyone to play in GTA 4 recently with the
bike bat.
Yeah, it's cool.
It was bike bat.
We should have bike bat.
What do you mean it was bike?
What does that mean?
It was bike bat.
The wrong game type.
You god damn it.
Fuck you.
It was still fun.
It had bike in the name.
I was half right.
I feel like I even said something about it in the moment.
Like, I thought this was different.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I immediately knew it was different, but I thought maybe we get the bats at some point.
maybe next time we can play on pc oh my god hey with jeff out of town are we like going crazy on heist or what are we doing i know by the time this is out we've already figured it out or whatever but like i'm sure we'll film some more okay how many videos how many heist videos are there now
like what are we up to do you know nick offhand 11 have come out is that right but right but how many are we recorded We did 12, which was the original run.
And then I think we're through seven or eight doomsday.
Okay.
So like 20.
Yeah, right around there.
Plus the mini heist.
We'll have to get through those.
And then unfortunately, Jeff, we're going to have to play a lot of Repo without you.
I'm very sorry.
Oh, no.
That's fine.
I understand.
I would never want to hold you guys back.
We'll all die.
And then Andrew can beat the level by himself.
And it'll be really good.
It'll be a lot of fun.
Unfortunately, I'll be coming back from vacation right about the time you guys are sick of playing Repo.
I'll just miss it.
You'll be thinking about it for two and a half weeks.
And I feel like I am uniquely suited to that because that happened to me so many times throughout my history of Achievement Hunter that I'm just used to it.
What we need to do shortly after you come back, Jeff, is record the summer movie battle for this upcoming season.
I put together the list of movies and it is a strong list.
Is it really?
There's a lot.
Did we ever announce who won the kicker picker?
No.
I don't think.
Oh, I have no idea.
I think
I saw a comment about it recently and and I don't think we ever said, but can we just say
Eric won?
Yeah, I just assumed it was me.
I think it was Eric.
All right.
All right.
Well, there you go.
Eric won.
Cool.
Hey, Eric.
Congratulations.
Thank you guys so much.
Hey, honestly, I really appreciate it.
Everyone kind of showed up, showed out.
Everyone kind of went out there, did their thing.
It's not a solo venture.
It's a team sport.
Everyone's got their role to play.
Everyone's out there kicking for points.
And, you know, may the best man win.
And this time it was me.
So thank you very much.
there you go there's a movie from the summer movie battle that is untitled and is just actor director combo set for this date can't wait for jeff to buy it oh is it kevin costner it's uh
oh my god do you think that's gonna be on this list it's not it's not currently scheduled for the summer what horizon part two horizon part two yeah i don't know if it's dated yeah you do you do technically own it so it would trade it would carry over yeah i think i should just get it still.
I've already got that one.
I should stop it.
No.
What am I buying it again?
If anybody's movies from last year show up in the theater again this year, do they get, do we count them?
No.
Like if there's like a summer run of last year's
Is it adding to the box office?
You do own the movie.
I think so.
But it's for a different season.
If you draft the player and then they leave your team and play for someone else, it's not like, oh, I drafted them.
Yeah, but it's not a different, it's not the same actor in a different movie.
But it's a statistical...
What we're playing for is season by season.
You did not draft them in the next season.
You already own it.
For the season in which the game takes place.
Right.
This is no longer that season.
We're restarting everything.
Does it add to the box office total, though?
Yeah, but for for, but we're not totaling that anymore.
So what's the director actor then?
Of what?
Oh, my God.
Dude, we are.
I don't know if we're fried or what, but that was.
Ryan Reynolds and the Night at the Museum guy.
You stop.
What?
For Dead Blue 3?
Or whatever?
Wolverine?
You
know, that there's a movie you're excited for to pick.
Oh, it's just a director and an actor.
I was really caught up.
It's Trey Parker, Matt Stone,
and Kendrick Lamar.
I'll get it.
I'm good.
I'll take it.
July 4th.
Slated.
Because last time it was David Chase horror thing.
I don't remember who else was part of that.
Why did you say Ryan Reynolds and Knight at the Museum guy?
He was thinking director and actor of Wolverine.
Yeah.
He said, who's the director and actor?
The last thing we talked about was Dead Fool Wolverine.
So it was Ryan Reynolds and then the Knight at the Museum 2 guy.
I don't know his name.
But we're agreed that if Horizon Part 2 is up there, it's mine, right?
No.
I mean, yeah, I think so.
I paid for it.
It's not like I generated any revenue for it last time.
Well, too bad.
Not this time either.
Too bad, my ass.
What do you mean?
Do we get the carryover money from last year?
I think I totally agree with Gavin here.
If you're playing fantasy football and you pick a player and you redraft the next year, you don't get the points for the players you redrafted or you took the previous year.
It's a movie, though.
It's not a sport.
No, it's just a movie.
It's a fantasy game.
You did say it was a movie that our studio owned and produced.
Yeah, and we were tracking for one season, and then we're restarting, and we're losing everything.
I don't think we had studios.
Did we have studios for that?
Or was that just for our DVD box sets?
We did the DVD box sets with studios.
We didn't have studios at the time we did.
I mean, I did in my head, but okay.
You vote no.
You vote no.
My definition is no.
Nick, let's hear your reason for no.
I don't want it.
Okay, that's pretty definite.
Nick is a logical, reasonable man.
What you paid for it last year, it didn't come out in time.
That's on you.
I'm sorry.
So here we are.
It seems like Nick and Andrew are both hard-nosed.
Gavin and Jeff are both yeses.
Very.
So it's
interesting.
Very interesting.
And let's keep in mind that I had a disadvantage last year because
you played poorly.
Now, what was yes,
what was the disadvantage there?
I mean, you definitely picked, you made a shitty pick, dude.
I don't know that that's a disadvantage.
I think Jeff just changed his vote.
Don't start pushing me on their side, Gavin.
Yeah.
You don't think one of my movies coming out wasn't a disadvantage?
I mean, I had a movie that didn't come out too.
I had the fucking...
It was, but everyone's at risk for it.
I had the same problem with the David Chase thing.
By the way, if my David, the untitled David Chase movie comes out this year, I want it.
You absolutely should get it.
Yeah.
No, you can pay the points for it and get it again.
Yeah, exactly.
Well, I guess it depends on what Eric says right here.
Yeah, but
if I'm a studio and I buy a script.
We're not.
We're playing a game.
We're playing a game.
Andrew's going to get pissed.
If you draft a player.
And they blow their knee out.
That sucks.
You just take a hit.
That's just how it goes.
Hey, believe me, I lost a lot of kickers last year.
That is true.
What if we just pull the audience?
No,
what do we care about pulling the audience?
What are you crazy?
We're not pulling the audience for this.
Why not?
Because it's our game.
Yeah.
It's a game I want to play with.
Tremendous input on when everyone disagrees with me.
Look,
the company is split down the middle.
David has audience confidence after this worm stuff.
No, I mean, I've lost him this episode or the last one, but
I think it's a fair, I think it should be a fair vote.
I don't know.
I think we got to see what how Eric votes.
I think it's interesting because does this apply to every, I mean, there were, what, 40, 41 movies that were draftable last year.
And you're saying that if Maxine or A Quiet Place Day One or like Furiosa or whatever, come back into theater this year, like that's eligible because you drafted it before.
That's what you're saying?
Yeah.
Because sometimes a studio will hold a movie that's fully made, edited, finished.
I think it's way funnier if Horizon Part 2 comes out and somebody else gets to claim the money for it on the second goal.
That is very funny.
That is very funny, but I'm still, I mean, I agree that that's funny, but yeah, but what if it's now a shared studio product?
What project did I get a 50-50 split?
No,
just stick to your guns, Galenstein.
Stop trying to negotiate.
I'll tell you what.
You can take it if you give away the amount of points that you spent on it.
I don't think it's going to matter because that's very funny, by the way.
I think Eric's going to vote against us, Gavin.
I think that's the way the winds are blowing.
One, two, three.
Should we have to vote?
How many points did he give away for you?
Four.
I'm looking.
One, two, three.
It appears to be six.
I don't know if that's right.
I'm looking.
I'm checking right now.
It might be that he spent six points on that.
I will say the only way
I think Horizon and American American Saga chapter two is the only eligible one.
No other ones can be eligible.
It's that it's either that one or it's nothing.
Okay.
I was going to float a compromise of you get your movie back 20 years after it releases because that's also very funny to me.
If you have like a Titanic and it re-releases in theaters 20 years later and you're like, oh shit, this is my year.
I got that Titanic bump again.
I like that.
But I don't like when it's so close.
Yeah.
I think Horizon Part 2 is the only one that I would be okay with
Gavin getting.
But I also think now, let me pose this.
I don't know if this is one step sort of past it.
Should it cost him six points?
Yes.
Why?
That's just me buying it.
Get
meat.
Okay.
I bought it.
I owned the depth.
No, no, no.
You have to retain the rights to it.
To maintain the rights, you have to renew your rights.
Yes.
You have to renew your rights.
I think that that is totally fair.
But you know what?
You spent that, the six points you spent last season acquiring it also probably went into the marketing of it and everything.
Those are just sunk costs.
You got to do that again this year if you're going to release the film.
So it's going to cost you six points if you want it.
That's all.
It's going to cost me 100%
again.
It should surely be a percentage.
No, you have to pay, you paid a licensing fee.
It is a percentage.
100 is a percent.
I'm licensing it for myself.
No, what about this?
All right, I'll pay me six points.
No.
No, that's not how it works.
No.
You either subtract six points or it goes into the pool and anybody can buy it.
It becomes a lot of fun.
Oh my God.
There's
funny.
Now that's funny.
Now that's a great thing.
Auction and off
monopoly property style.
I like that a lot.
You have the first right of refusal because you bought it previously.
But if you don't want it for the points that you previously paid, then it goes back into the market for anybody else to acquire.
I can get behind this.
But I can still get involved in the auction.
Yes.
So I could potentially pick it up for cheap.
Yes.
Absolutely.
If you think it'll go less than, but anybody, it's free market at that point.
If you think after this conversation that
that's going for less than six, you're losing your fucking mind, buddy.
One of us is immediately just going to say for five, and then it'll just be him trying to decide.
It just
became revealed that one of us is the villain of the show.
Oh, that's a fun wrinkle.
I like that a lot.
Great idea, Gavin.
Once again,
great idea, Gavin.
Okay, so it's okay.
So it could be back in the pool.
You have a right of first refusal, and there you go.
This is great.
Stupid.
You're right.
It was a bad pick.
What are the chances that this fucking movie is coming out in 2025?
Zero, but
he wants to maybe buy it again, I guess.
So whatever.
We'll see.
Who's selling it?
That's a great question.
It's me.
I'm paying me.
No, no, you're paying.
You're just kind of like paying God.
You know what I mean?
There's like 0.0%
chance.
I will put it back into the pool
for six points.
You'll put it back in the pool for six points.
Is that what you said?
No.
You want to get paid six points?
Nobody else wants it.
I'll start with six extra points.
No.
So in this world, Gavin, and this make-believe thing that we've set up, this movie is
owned.
By whoever made the film in real life, and you've purchased a licensing right from them that expires after a season.
It's not their fault you didn't release the fucking movie last year.
Yeah, why didn't you release it?
Yeah, you should have released it, man.
Yeah, dude, come on.
Yeah, but that would have been a clause that says if the movie doesn't come out, the license extends.
No,
it should.
If it doesn't come out,
no such clause exists.
Can you point to that clause?
Actually, I have the fictional contract right here.
The clause says,
it says that if it doesn't, then you have first right of refusal for the same price the following year.
Yep.
I'm arguing with three annoying wolves.
Wait, four.
In a room that you...
He instructed me.
You heard it.
No, no, you heard it.
He doesn't think I'm annoying.
I know I was not included in that.
Three annoying wolves and a wool.
Oh, man.
All right.
We should wrap this up because I think we landed on exactly what we're doing, so I feel good about it.
I love it.
Yeah.
Great idea.
Yeah, great idea, dude.
Where do we actually end up?
What is it?
You have a first rate refusal.
Refusal.
It costs you six points if you want it.
If not, it'll go back in the pool.
So we'll just open with that.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, we open with that one.
Huh.
I'm glad you brought it up.
I mean, I think it's a pretty good compromise.
Yeah, I think so.
For who?
For everybody involved.
Yeah.
You basically get access to your movie again if you want it, and nobody can stop you.
Like, that's
lucky me.
I also get access to my chair and my desk.
All these things I bought guess what buddy.
I like
hey listen motherfucker.
I am sitting on an untitled David Chase movie that is not included in this fucking deal.
I think if it
should get I spent my points on it just like you did but I heard Eric say the only way I agree to this is if only fucking Gavin's movie is included and everybody agreed with that so I went along with a ride.
I'm like, yeah, okay, if that's how it is, that's how it is.
My movie didn't even have a fucking title.
Maybe that's the prerequisite.
It has to have a name for it to be considered.
It's cool.
I'll eat the cost.
And I acquiesced to that privately and internally because I realized it was what was for the best.
And I think that this is a compromise.
I feel we all compromised, and it's great.
Good compromise, guys.
Good compromise, everybody.
I feel like some came out slightly better than others, but yeah, that was good negotiation.
Yeah, some people have access to movies, other people don't.
That's pretty cool.
Yeah, nice work.
Poor annoying moves.
Can we tail safe?
We should.
We definitely should.
Boy.
This has been great.
Thank you so much.
Appreciate everyone who listened.
Thanks for checking us out.
Thanks for
watching Mario Party.
Thanks for sticking with us.
Thanks for checking out Patreon.
Thanks for being with us for almost one full
year.
It's been great.
And it's only getting better.
And that's from me, your kicker picker winner, Eric.
We'll see you guys next time.
Check out the Patreon.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Love you guys.
Oh, and just in case I die on vacation, this is the last podcast I was ever in.
So I love you all.
Bye.
Bye.
Oh, God.
Bye.
Good morning, guests, tomorrow.
All right.
Second, the last podcast I was ever in.
Bye.
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